Chapo Trap House - 308 - There's Nothing Like a Dame feat. Nick Hayes (4/21/19)

Episode Date: April 22, 2019

Virgil corrects the record; we riff on the church thing from a week ago; we crow over two Grey Lady articles about the anti-Bernie crowd running scared; and Nick Hayes (@nickfromdetroit) sits in to talk about Means TV (@means_tv), a leftist streaming service. Means TV: http://means.media Donate to Means TV: https://actionnetwork.org/fundraising/lets-build-means-tv DecrimNY Fundraiser: https://www.crowdrise.com/o/en/campaign/decriminalize-sex-work-in-new-york1 Ithaca Show (4/26): https://www.facebook.com/events/2289071681420039/ Housing Works Trivia (5/1): https://chapomaydaytrivia.splashthat.com/ European Tour (ON SALE FRIDAY): http://chapotraphouse.com/tour Sign Up For Our Newsletter: https://chapotraphouse.us17.list-manage.com/subscribe?u=8e5c6079155c6d17d65bb0a32&id=eaf859b922

Hey everyone, I have to take a moment and respond to some statements made on this show a couple weeks ago when I was not present. Now I don't listen to this program. I've never had to listen to my own podcast, I'm not terribly sure what it's about. All of this percolated down to me through the hate messages I received from the weepy woke people, identity Europa members, sexual offenders, and other such individuals who contact us, and that gave me the gist of what you creatures have said, and I feel that I must set the record straight.

First off, allow me to settle this trivial controversy, yes it is wrong to have children. I've explained this many times, imagine if I built a robot capable of feeling pain, and then I told it I'm going to unplug it in 70 minutes, and then I set it on fire. It would be wheeling around in circles, flailing its flanges, going why, why, error, error. And now that'd be funny, and we'd all be laughing of course, but I've still done a bad thing. Don't have children. It has nothing to do with climate change, and it has nothing to do with the Jacobin articles by people who fucked up and had kids and are trying to delude you all into thinking they

didn't fuck up, which we all know they did. We all think that. Evidence, we don't have kids. There you go. My arguments for having kids, I'm bored. I'm ready for the next stage in life. I want to watch something learn about dandelions and ethnic cleansing. I'm aging, and I've given up on all my dreams, so I have to offload them onto someone else

and a desperate bid for immortality. These are all modeling selfish reasons for bringing life into existence. You might be thinking, oh, I can program my child to feel happiness. Well, guess what, Omelie? You can devote your resources right now to those who are suffering in poverty, to organizations as imperfect as they are that can direct your excess income towards social justice, political change. And if your only ethical imperative is to create joy, you can do that by putting LSD in your

boss's coffee. Ideally, ideally, we would forge a global agreement to no longer have children and to use the surplus resources that would otherwise be squandered on child-rearing to the development of labor-saving automatons. The devices powered by these resources could drive our vehicles, conduct surgeries, have sex with us, and otherwise increase our quality of life. And we program to feel pain. Well, of course we would.

That'd be funny. To conclude my first point, no moral reason have a kid, no ethical reason have a kid, no logical reason have a kid. One exception. If you're in a relationship that's on the rocks and you want to try to keep it going, maybe having a kid will do the trick. That's worth a shot. Number two.

You live in a dying world. Any rational person would conclude that the situation you're in is hopeless. Should you feel joy? Obviously, it's easy for me to answer this question. I'm with the half of my colleagues who used to have a low standard of living, grew up on a fixed income, used to take advantage of various welfare programs. Other half, potty trained on golden thrones, went to the same fancy lad Westchester High School where the boys room stall had AOC's phone numbers scrawled on the wall in Latin.

That's, you will know, he's laughing because he knows. But now I'm doing great. Some of my debts are paid off. I have a lot of legendary skins and I'm experiencing ego death weekly. Yet, I recognize that in the absence of systemic change, what we might even call revolutionary change, all of that is trivial and transient. The neighborhood I'm standing in will fall under water, et cetera, et cetera. So should I feel happy about that answer, yes, because I'm spending the podcast money

on drugs that enable me to appear behind the curtain of reality and gain insights from the spirit realm, which I then deliver to you. And by the time the IRS realizes that's not a valid business expense, we'll all be dead. As for you, the anxious and self-conscious listener of my words, I permit you to feel joy 25% of your day. A regular person sleeps about eight hours a day. So combined with that, you're spending 50% of your time alive on earth in bliss. That's a square deal.

In closing, that should solve all your issues. It's rather cheap to get an IUD or a Zectomy, although these are not publicly funded as they ought to be. Ohio has just passed a six-week abortion ban, which stands to be upheld by the far-right-wing high-court majority. Hold the balance of power over your body, in which case, if you're a feminist like me, you should make yourself aware of which kitchen improvements can slice through the bone for when society breaks down.

That's all I wanted to say, you know, don't let me otherwise interrupt the little Lord of the Falkeroy Socialist Autarchy Roleplay Hour, DJ, let's hear that trot. Okay, a formal rebuttal to OneVirginalTexas. The word children comes from two Greek words, chilios, which means cold, and dren, which is a guy with a cold saying den. Through this, we can see that a creating progeny is a cold cave. Cave is the root word for the English word comfort. So we can see that it's a cold comfort.

To have a kid is to imbue them with the name of whatever fandom you have. You want to name your kid Lannister? Go ahead. You want to name your kid Deep Space Nine? You want to name your kid Porgo? I do. You want to name your kid The Matrix? Do you want to make your kid dress up in an assassin's creed outfit every day?

You can do it. But the most important part about having a kid, especially if you're a politically active adult, like everyone who listens to this show, most of whom not in danger of having kids, not because they're not sexually active, but because they stick condoms down their urethra's. They don't know how to put them on. They've never successfully applied them. They just stick them down their urethra's.

They eat female condoms because that's how they think it works because they're trying to be male feminist. They just swallow them whole. This is one of the lowest IQ listenerships of any show. But to have a kid is to have a device you can use to win an argument. You arguing with someone about some just fucking indecipherable internal drama and whatever left organization you're in, hey, it'd be like, I have a kid and I don't want to raise them in a world where bylaw 562 exists.

Well, that person that you're arguing with is going to be afraid that you're going to kill your kid if they pass that bylaw. Boom. Problem solved. Having an argument about fandom. Oh, who do you think knows more about X-Men days of the past in front of us? Do you think it's just the dumbass or do you think it's the guy who named his daughter Dark Phoenix Neo?

So not only is it all right to have kids, it's the most moral thing you can do. Don't drop that beat. Let's hear some Mozart for a change. This has been Firing Live. I don't know what I believe anymore, but there's there's much to think about. Well, in Assassin's Creed, you sit in a special chair and you access the memories that are left in your dad's comb by putting on a robe and jumping into, hey, do you think the game of Assassin's Creed would be possible if people didn't have kids?

No, I'm so confused. I don't know what to do. Should I have a child? You should probably have like three because what if one dies? That's a good point. One of them, just like I'm doing the math here, one of them is going to be like deeply affected by their sibling dying. So that basically a wasted kid as well.

You got two missing. One of them is going to be pretty resilient. That's why the bushes had like seven kids despite being rich. You know what's even more fun to dress up as your favorite fandom? Kitty cat, a little kitty cat dressed up like SJW Star Wars. That's true. It's pretty good. It's pretty good when a cat puts on like Boba Fett's hat like that a lot.

It's pretty fun. It's like, hey, little guy, I hope there's no cat nipping space. Well, regardless of where you come down on this issue, I think we can all agree on one thing is that you should make pretty much all major life decisions based on what we tell you to do. Oh, yes. Absolutely. Yeah.

No question. Here's my bit. Yeah. Hello. Je m'appelle a guillaume. I am a lazy French construction worker. Oh, sorry, mon ami. I lift my little gawa cigarettes in a bucket of oily rags while I took my three hour lunch

and the mistress break from work at Notre Dame Cathedral and my bad, mommy. Did you guys see by far the best joke about Notre Dame burning down was Brace's joke? Ray said Macron was told that a 607 year old woman was getting hot and he dropped everything and ran. This I got to see. I don't want to I don't want to join this like making fun of French people after their historic volume burned down or the, you know, body's adjacent space that was bad and deserved to burn down.

I don't know what you're thinking I have yet, but do you think it's funny? Do you think it's funny that the French safety inspector who inspects all the buildings in France was distraught over a particularly emotional Mr. Bean skid he saw? He didn't expect any buildings. That's it. Funny. Do you dude? Yes, it is.

You guys, that's not even. That's how it happened. That's not what did it. And some people say, oh, it was definitely Muslims. It was not. It was it was a prank by a bunch of USC frat boys. You really think it's funny. It's funny that this horrible tragedy happened because all the safety inspectors were on

strike because McCron tried to raise the work week to 17 minutes. We think a lot of French people all the time and they deserve it. But it is cool how they're like, McCrone will be like, what if we have a law that says you can no longer kill your boss? They just fucking fuck you and then they just start going out punching cops in the face. It is cool. But they're really good at setting cars on fire too. So cathedrals, you know, shouldn't be too big of a leap from there.

Yeah, it is cool. But look at what they squander all that labor power on. What? Being smoking cigarettes? Yeah. Yeah. Being racist. Driving around on a bicycle with a baguette in their bag, demanding of an increase to

the earned income mistress allowance. French people, they have like an earned superiority complex by, you know, how relatively big dick their labor population is compared to, you know, anywhere else. But they lose it because they'll watch like dumb and dumber and just start weeping at how brilliant it is. Yeah. No, they have universal basic order on. Well, I do want to talk a little bit more about Notre Dame burning down.

But first, I want to introduce our guest who's sitting in the trap this week. It's Nick Hayes from Means TV. He's the the wonder kid behind the the brand new socialist streaming platform that you may have heard about. Nick, what's up? What's happened? And thanks for having me. That's what's up.

He's like a he's like a mad mixture of Sergei Eisenstein and Brandon Tartikov. Well, I don't know about that brand in Wardell, probably that too. So I feel again a little bit responsible for the burning of one of the world's most historic heritage sites. What the fuck dude? I feel like we willed it into being by doing that episode about Ben Shapiro's shitty book about the death of Western civilization and not too far, not too earlier than that, doing an episode on Glenn Beck, who certainly covered himself in glory following this fire by like,

you know, Shapiro, of course, the the death of the West Brigade people are just like the burning of Notre Dame is what's been happening every day. Like people not going to church is really what burned Notre Dame down. It's just symbolic of the West abandoning its heritage. And then Glenn Beck took it a step further, literally saying on TV, if it was arson, we'll never know. Yep. It's just like, what a cool sickos of France are going to cover for the Islamists because

they don't want white people to wake up to what's happening because they're part of the Soros Cabal. I mean, it's amazing and it's perfectly self-contained because in their minds now it was definitely arson because there's no evidence of it. The fact that there isn't evidence of it proves that it was because it means it's being covered up. Done and done. But I just think they're being the wrong kind of racist because as soon as I saw flames

leaping out from the scaffoldings of the Notre Dame renovation, I was just like, well, this is obviously lazy and competent French workmen smoking cigarettes. And yeah, Have you seen any of the Facebook posts of people being like, wow, the sanctuary still standing like faith, you know, that kind of thing, like the brick part just burned, wow. Well, I mean, Nick, that's interesting because like I was thinking of the like the other day, like all of the like the death of the West people who are won't admit it publicly because they're too busy like, you know, crying and lamenting on the timeline, but like deep

down inside, they're really glad this happened, you know, they really love nothing more than to wallow in this kind of shit and, you know, pretend that it was like, you know, Muslims who, you know, burning on there. Because even if it wasn't, people start thinking about what if it was, what if it was, and would that make me feel? Yeah, exactly. It would make me feel exactly like I'm feeling now all the time, but now I have like a physical image to look at.

Yeah. But the thing is like, there's something so essentially like faithless about that and like, you know, I'm not a religious person, but if I was, it would be so easy. Like after this massive fire like swept through the entire cathedral, you just be like, oh, wait, look, the stained glass window is still there. The crucifix is still there. It seems like God saved it to me, like, you know, have you seen the music of like Jesus running into the fire, grabbing shit and saving it?

They're like the weaves who don't know anything about Japan, but for Catholicism, they're like, oh my God, Muslims came in there and burned down the Christ machine. Christ machine's broken now. Do you realize how important that is to us Catholics? It's like Santa's Slam. Do you realize that Muslims poured halal sauce all over St. Peter's sword, I think? St. Peter's St. Peter's street catenna, the boxing of the seven sacraments. They rare a crown of thorns unboxing.

It appears to be breathing together in the glass tube. We are here doing, this is another of our famous unboxing videos. This will be the unboxing video of the Ark of the Covenant. Oh, no. Oh, dear. Oh, no. And then, like, of course, the other thing is, let's go around the circle. I've been to Notre Dame, visited it, inside in it, saw it before the fire.

We win. We win. Matt and I have seen it. I have not seen it. Oh, never owned your own. Felix. Chris. I'm owned.

Chris has seen it. Hell yeah. Felix. The word cathedral comes from the Latin word Catholic and the word Benadryl. And so it's a medicine for the soul. I saw it when I was eight years old. It's a very tough time. So since you two losers, yeah, well, because you can never do it.

We've done it. If I had died when I was 16, eight years old would have been the middle of my life. So think about that. My friend told me. What's the most pivotal? If I had died earlier, one of the most pivotal moments of my life that I forgot about until you asked me would have been a wreck. So could you please fuck me?

My friend told me that she went there, but she didn't go in because they don't allow outside beverages, so I'm pretty sure I would have made the same calculation. As a troll, like they've just they've already raised like a massive amount of money to rebuild, you know, the one and a half billion dollars. I think we should do a competing GoFundMe, but just as a troll, do it like and like get concept art made where it's just like, we're going to rebuild Notre Dame, but update it with brutalist architecture. Yes, the big concrete slab shutting out of the middle is the most inflammatory thing

you can think of. Like there'll be a Funko Christ. Ah, you work in mysterious ways. The Notre Dame Fire Day Twitter was just really abysmal because like on the one hand, there was like the ultra like left woke take, which is just like, it's actually good that just burned down and like, you know, oh, you're crying for Notre Dame, but not, you know, a million other catastrophes or tragedies that are going on in the world, which is dumb. But then like even Dumber was just like all the people just like just ashing their teeth

over this fucking building. It's like, dude, sorry, it had a great run as the world's number one building, but I think it's time to give I don't know the Chrysler a shot. I do love the Chrysler. The number one spot. You know, come on. My favorite art echo. It would have just like caved in.

Like it sounds like the reading, even like a little bit about it, like they did all this shoddy like reconstruction work on it at the turn of the 20th century, and it was like just part like huge segments of it were just like slipping off the foundation and stuff. And that's why they were doing the reconstruction transit. Gloria all must and get over it, but it's just, it's just, it was a big deal and it is, it's humbling in that moment to see such an, you know, an enduring symbol of civilization burn in front of you. Like that is, it should be humbling for a minute.

I wasn't. So of course not also you don't have to break your ass to show everyone else how upset you are about it or how little you care either way. You just have to get on on fucking record with everybody. I am incredibly moved by this. That's how soulful I am. That's how much I care about culture or being like, I am so fucking woke and I'm so anti imperialist.

This is funny to me. I'm like the dang joker over here is funny that it burned down like in a way. Well, I don't look, I haven't come up with the most infuriating possible position on this yet. I'm sure you will. I think it's, I think it's somewhere along the lines of like, I don't know. It's a tough one to work on because I've refused to actually learn anything about France. So I don't think we're going to make a full go of this one, but just, you know, a very

historic building burning down because let's assume someone just threw a cigarette somewhere. That's probably the reason, right? That's pretty funny, but it was a cool looking building. So that's sad, but no one died and that's good. And okay, they should make it a Baha'i temple. Boom. I just want to like bring up kind of a silver lining to all this too, which is assassin creed unity is alpha.

I did a, I did a search for assassin's creed Notre Dame and the results were. I'm beginning to say the least. Were they epic? But you know, a lot of people didn't physically get to see them, but they did get to see them in Ubisoft's adventure, assassin's creed unity, where you get to clip through the altar itself. Felix, people are, people are crying about what happened to the, the cathedral and assassin's creed, but like raccoon city is still in the state it's in, you know, can we get a fundraiser

going maybe? No, I, it was, it was another one of those events that like, I feel like if it happened like 10 years ago, this would have been like a three month long news cycle and there would have been like a special time addition, the special issue of time that you read in your dentist office. A hundred most influential buildings. Not, not it would just be like the past and future of Notre Dame or like, you know, beauty from the ashes or whatever, but now because it just, we get so much information all the

time and every, every day there's a new thing that would have been a new big cycle like 10 years ago and our receptors are just completely fucking fried. Everyone's just tripping all over themselves to just examine this one input and jam it down the same pipe, but just sort of filter it through their shitty brain. You know, be it like, I went here with my parents when I was 14 and it made me the person I am today and it's basically like you fucking killed me today or you know, fuck Notre Dame or what, and I don't really get mad at anyone for doing any of that because that's the, you know, the government, the nanny state is stepping in on, you know, things that hurt

no one like abusing opiates and this is all we have left, but you know, we're going to forget this happened in two weeks. One group of people whose brains are definitely fried and for shit or like the, I had to check in on Rod Dreher, of course, he burned through every synapse in his brain on this and it's just like I said earlier, the way these people just love feeling this way, like they're so happy this happened because it gives them a chance to, like I said, like theatrically wallow and how miserable and besieged they feel, but it's the same people who always say that Muslims have like, they talk about like Muslim, martyrdom complex, it's just

the clearest projection ever. Being a Christian in America who thinks they're oppressed, like I thought it was bad during the Bush years and it was maybe like a little bit more infuriating then because it felt more officially enshrined in state policy. Not that it isn't now, I mean it very much is now, but I guess it's less culturally overt now, but to do it now is just so fucking funny if it wasn't so insufferable and infuriated. The move that they're doing, of course, is like, you know, Glenn Beck, just like already first stalling, like you could ask him like, what would convince you that this wasn't arson

and nothing good, like he just literally gave people permission to believe what they're already going to believe about this. And Rod Dreher was like, I certainly hope we find out this wasn't arson because I can't imagine with the violence that France would suffer in retaliation for that. He's just edging. And he's like, he's already like buying his plane ticket and getting fingers crossed, but He was just slapping his erect cock, didn't even jacking off, he was just fucking open

palm slapping it. Yeah, we're going to get a really good answer on this one. You just picture the French fire inspector standing in the ashes, sucking on a cigarette going, oh, life. What if through a chain of events, like Rod Dreher goes over to France to like investigate it and figure out their bathroom situation and he becomes like a Jerry Lewis figure. They like think it's a comedy act. Who's this 60 year old man who's obsessed with bathrooms?

This is the rebirth of Lewis. He could become the new Mr. Ooloh. Yeah, he'd be like the bathroom shenanigans of Mr. Dreher. It's called a Rod Dreher's bathroom playtime. That's the new funniest French movie ever made. La Toilette Créton. One of the best reactions of this vintage is that guy, that wet face creep Matt Wall sh who is just like bang for blood and just going, I'd really like someone to explain

to me how a fire could get that big that quickly. Yeah. It's just like, I don't know, like an ancient wooden structure covered in construction equipment. And he's like to send him just like the Wikipedia article for fire. I've never read about this before. Fire spreading. I don't think so.

Did you guys see that video of John Kasich doing like a reaction video? Oh, that was great. I thought I was like waiting for him to be like, I've donated $20,000 to Notre Dame University. He is going to be doing guy in his car YouTube soon. No, like, uh, yeah. I hope so. Kasich was just in a parking lot in Ohio, which I really liked is the contrast talking

about this World Heritage site and he just being like, I'll tell you what, you know, he's like, you can burn the building, but you can't burn the memories. Oh my God. No matter what, no matter what, the Irish will stay fighting, they'll be fighting the fires wherever they are. Yeah. He's standing in his desolate parking lot. There's a security guard in the right off frame.

Like, Hey, you know, remember that Western culture we're all mourning? Yeah. This is its gravestone right here. Right. He said I couldn't sleep here and I told him this was public land. I mean, the two most likely outcomes, Kasich burned down Notre Dame while trying to charge his phone. A Samsung Galaxy note.

Did you hear about the fire at Notre Dame or it was a symbolic act by forces sympathetic to Dan Quinn. Oh, you're right. Lucifer Lou Holtz, that they think his bones are enshrined actually in Notre Dame. I like it. I think it'll be funny when the billions of dollars for the Notre Dame go fund me or squandered and missing and McCron posts a screenshot of his note saps saying, you know, I'm still in a toxic situation and I just got out of rehab for my pastese addiction.

So I don't really, this criticism is just harming my mental state. And of course it wouldn't have been a, you know, world level news event if our own president didn't chime in on Twitter with the hilarious suggestion that they use the like the forest fire airplanes, just several tons of water, a bunch of guys are just standing there watching a fire. Totally helpless. Like we need the big, wet, senile baby to tell us what to do. I just love it.

Oh my God. If only we knew what beat fire. I just, I love his confidence though. I mean, it shows you why he is president is that he does anything that happens. Like he feels like he can just, he's like, you know, I think the key to putting out the fire is to use more water than there is fire. And then, you know, like people pointed out, like the, the drop that was on forest cause like to drop all that water is like really heavy and it would literally collapse the

entire stone and fist of the building. So that's good. But yeah, be on the lookout, Ben Shapino, of course, as usual is like smarter, smarter than like the Mount Walsh Glenn Beck figures in that he didn't outright start immediately making intimations that this was some kind of a covered up arson job by the Mohammedans. Oh, he's more subtle than that. But he did hilariously claim that Notre Dame is a monument to Judeo-Christian culture. And as many people pointed out during the construction of Notre Dame, the Jews were

literally expelled from France and they burned every like Jewish like text in a big bonfire in front of Notre Dame. You know what? You have a few tips. People make mistakes. You have a few disagreements. You get together stronger though, you know, once again, that's what stronger together means.

Yeah. These people literally know nothing about. They know nothing about. At all. Yeah. They know nothing about it. In the middle ages, if your kid got a whooping cough, you went and killed a Jew over it. I mean, that was just like how you dealt with any kind of problem in your life.

Well, I mean, you know, they got rid of whooping cough though. So I don't like to cure, but like if that's what works, just walking around like Liam Neeson, just like, I gotta find one of these bastards. Well, you know, our condolences to the people of France, sorry, we can't make it there on our tour. But you know, you don't speak our language and aren't very funny anyway. So I gotta say, see, Jewel of St. John the Divine now number one, number one in the world sorry, Notre Dame, you had a great run, but Cathedral of St. John the Divine number one.

I think Rick Warren's church is now the number one cathedral in the West Saddleback Ranch. That's the shield of the West, my opinion. So pizza ranch, actually. All right. So there is a certain New York Times article, there's actually two New York Times articles that came out this week about this presidential race and some of our favorite characters contained within this plot line that when formed together are just a magnificent tea party that I really have to share with our listeners and you guys.

It's just, it tastes so damn good to sip. This is a particularly delicious tea and piping hot. Courtesy of Elizabeth Williamson and Kenneth P. Vogel of the New York Times, we get an amazing profile of near attended of the Center for American Progress, the headline, The Rematch. Bernie Sanders versus a Clinton loyalist and like this is New York Times, this is the paper of record and it is now in the paper of record, basically all of the inane shit that we talk about and make fun of Twitter all day long. Yes, we've been vindicated, sir.

This is real news. Twitter is real life and don't believe anyone who tries to tell you otherwise. Yeah. So this is a, this is a good counterpoint to all the people who are like, when you talk about Twitter bullshit, when you talk about real shit, well, we have been talking about real shit. That's what this is. Harassing this old woman is real shit.

So I'm just going to dive into this article here. It says, the bad blood started early in 2008, near attended, then a top eight on Hillary Clinton's first presidential campaign, accompanied Mrs. Clinton to what was expected to be an easy interview with the Center for American Progress, the influential group founded by top Clinton aides, but Faiz Shakir, the chief editor of the think tanks, think progress website, asked Mrs. Clinton a question about the Iraq war, an issue dogging her candidacy because she had supported it. Ms. Tandon responded by circling back to Mr. Shakir after the interview, according to

a person in the room, punching him in the chest. I didn't slug him. I pushed him. A still angry Ms. Tandon corrected in a recent interview. Hell yeah. So off the bat in this profile, near attended, we have her admitting to assaulting a coworker for asking Hillary Clinton a pointed question about her support of the Iraq war. She's basically Shug Knight, but Felix, I know you would like this, holding Matt dust

over a balcony. Oh, man. I don't know. Well, I mean, I know you're in favor of physically abusing people who work in DC and any job in Washington, DC. Yes. Okay. If Amy, too, is the last dragon near a sheer sea star, she, I don't see how you walk away

with this from this article, liking her less because, okay, the things to actually not like about her are like policy related, but I'll be honest, my image of her before this article was sort of like an icy, like that icy is not the right word, like robotic kind of like the way that people in DC are robotic and seem to take no pleasure in anything and have no passion. But this is like, this is real shit, man. And he's real. Shit.

She's, she is the real ass dude. Real ass dude of the week. Well, it's what Felix is what you and me always admired about Peter Dow and Tom Watson. Just their posters. Well, Tom, Tom, Tom's just, Tom's like, Tom's there for a paycheck. I think Peter though, Peter is a man of passion. Yeah. It's nearly as two, I, I, I got some respect for it, man.

Well, she's fucking posting at three 30 in the morning every day to the people with a hundred followers. She's powered by pure hatred and vengeance. And Fias too. He's the campaign manager for Bernie too. So this is cap. This is near tanned and literally punching the Bernie campaign. Yeah.

Yeah. As I said, he, Fias went to, went on to be, you know, running Bernie Sanders campaign. And then, you know, this week, they've think progress to that video, sort of making fun of Bernie about being a millionaire because of his, his book. And then the Sanders campaign, you know, sent them an angry letter saying, you know, like, I thought you were supposed to be, you know, neutral in the campaign and then fundraised off. Yeah.

Yeah. So reading, continuing in the article it says here, the blowup is another reflection of the ideological divisions among Democrats, this time between a legacy Clinton organization and a liberal wing trying to move the party to the left to harness the energy of millennials. Mr. Sanders team remains convinced that the Democratic establishment worked behind the scenes to deprive him of the party's nomination in 2016. His campaign has cast the group as beholden to corporate interests set on thwarting him in 2020.

Ms. Tandon rejected that characterization and asserted in an email to Mr. Shakir that the center shares the goals of unity. Jodi Enda, the editor in chief of think progress said her that her website is editorially independent and that we don't have a favorite candidate and we don't have a candidate who we disfavor. Still, Ms. Tandon's mother, Maya Tandon says that her daughter can be very aggressive. She's not going to let anyone rule over her, she said. And she has loyalty to Hillary because Hillary is the one who made her. Those Bernie brothers are attacking her all the time, but she lets them have it too, Maya

Tandon said. She said Sanders, she says Sanders got a pass in 2016, but he's not getting a pass this time. So this is Nira's own mother spilling the tea. Okay. She's very mad about that. Why did they call her mom? Yeah, why?

Like, what the fuck? It's a very odd choice. You're like, why did they do that? It's a very odd choice. I don't. I can't. That's an incredibly odd choice. Yeah.

This is Connie Chung all over again. Yes. I can't. I can't speak to why they did it, but I'm certainly glad that they did do it. Oh, of course. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know if I am.

It's just very odd. I don't know. Oldest woman. It feels very strange to me. I don't know why the fuck they did that. They were Romeo dialing Felix. I guess so. Everybody's been like, if you go look at that tweet where she's like, this is really upsetting.

It's just like people on the left climbing over each other to be like, this is wrong. I'm sorry this happened to you. All the people on there, it's just like, who cares? It's fine. I mean, talk about things we're not really going to remember a few weeks from now. I'm just very puzzled by it. I have nothing to say, but that is incredibly puzzling to me. Felix, are you taking this opportunity to send a coded message to his mother to never

pick up the phone or talk about him to a journalist? My mother would say, I mean, I have a Jewish mother, so she would only talk to the press to say, I'm a perfect angel who has a clean room. Liar. Well, it's the thought that counts, isn't it? Continuing here, it says, the Center for American Progress and its sister political arm with a $60 million combined annual budget and 320 staff members have played an outsized role in the Democratic Party for nearly two decades.

Founded in 2003 by top advisors to Bill and Hillary Clinton, the organization has sought to rebrand itself as a brain trust for the anti-Trump resistance. Its donor roles overlap substantially with those of the Clinton's campaign and foundation. The think tank has taken in millions from interests often criticized by liberals, including Wall Street financiers, big banks, Silicon Valley Titans, foreign governments, defense contractors, and the health care industry. Individual donors can ask to remain anonymous. Ms. Tandon, whose salary was $397,000 in 2018, was an unpaid advisor to Mrs. Clinton's

2016 campaign while running the think tank and was considered a candidate for a top White House job had Mrs. Clinton won the presidency. I think that just seems wrong. That's just okay because there's no more campaign finance laws that she can be an advisor to the Clinton campaign while running this organization with huge shadow donors. Yeah, that seems like a convenient workaround. But back to Mrs. Tandon's Maya Tandon, the mom, she says, that's what she does. She shows up at rich people's places because she needs funds from them.

That place runs on near a Tandon. Damn right it does. She runs on Xanax. So yeah, I think accurately describing her job is just like kissing ass of rich people to get their donations. I mean, I'd launder their shitty points of view in a liberal way. I sympathize with that. That's kind of our job too.

That's why we're doing this whole European tour. We've got to go to the Iron Bank and explain ourselves. Yeah. Or else, if we don't go over to Braavos, aka Germany, the Iron Bank, aka the ECB will back PodSafe America. They do an example, though, of how this courting of donors does seem to influence the policy of CAP. It says here in November 2015, after Mrs. Tandon invited Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu

of Israel to a question and answer session at the center, a dozen staff members stood during an all staff meeting and read a statement of protest. In an email Ms. Tandon sent on the day of the Netanyahu visit stolen and released by WikiLeaks, she told the think tanks founder, John D. Podesta, that the far left hates me for hosting Mr. Netanyahu. But the invitation may have sealed the deal with a new board member, Mrs. Tandon was wooing Mr. Levine, a pro-Israel philanthropist. The next month, Ms. Tandon wrote a jubilant email to Mr. Podesta telling him Mr. Levine

was joining the board. So Netanyahu was worth it, she added, with a smiley face emoji. Mr. Levine no longer sits on the center's board, but his foundation remains a big donor. Oh, speaking to her Twitter habits, it says, on one recent night, Ms. Tandon feuded on Twitter with liberals over whether Mrs. Clinton's condemned far-right hate mongers strongly enough more than two years ago. The online bickering raged for an hour, drawing trolls from both factions. When the woman originally targeted by Ms. Tandon's tweets delivered a wake-up call.

Nira, you're responding to a graduate student on Twitter at 1.40 AM. That was Hannah Gase, actually. Yeah, shout it out. But the article does give a pretty good look at how CAP operates as a fundraising arm. I think it can legitimately be said that they raise money from incredibly rich donors, and in exchange they craft and talk about policy in a way that doesn't offend them or speaks to their goal. And they help create the agenda of the Democratic Party because those dollars in Congress don't

know anything about policy. They're all unemployable fail-sons and small business fucking Philistines and, like, local TV anchors. They have no practical understanding of any policy. They need to outsource that shit, and CAP does it. And in one end of it goes money from fucking Gulf dictatorships and the defense industry and pharmaceuticals. And out of the other side comes things like Medicare for all plus, platinum limited edition.

One more thing here says, Ms. Tandon acknowledged tensions with what she called millennial agitators in her party, but blamed Mr. Trump, who made crazy radical ideas seem more normal, she said in the interview. Oh, my God. Crazy. Again, she's talking about Medicare for all. That's the same as putting a dome over America. Yeah.

I mean, yeah, no, this is what CAP exists to do is stop something like Medicare for all happening. Which is why anyone who got mad at Bernie for criticizing CAP, you just fundamentally don't understand what the stakes are here and what the issues are and what the conflicts are. The odd thing about that where they're like, why is Bernie picking a fight with a obscure think tank that, like, you know, most Americans, you know, couldn't care less about or know about.

And I'm like, well, A, if that's the case, then what harm does it do? And B, like, maybe most people may not know it, but, like, this is like a real contest for, like, who's going to control the future of the Democratic Party and they are on the other side. Yes. I mean, they have to lend the est. I think one of the common criticism of Bernie recently is people saying, oh, he has no idea to do the things he wants to do.

Well, if you're unaware why Trump has not been able to do a lot of things he's campaigned on, besides a lack of will in doing it, it's because all the people he has to staff his administrations and departments with are people from existing think tanks. And those think tanks have positions identical to Rubio or Jeb or someone like that. So he ends up governing like that out of laziness and out of default. And so to take on the existing think tank world, whether you agree with how it's done or not, it does show that he has some idea of how he wants to get some of these things done.

You can't have both. Yeah. Well, before we move on, Felix, this is the New York Times calling your mother. This is Mikey Barber calling your mother. Mrs. Biedermann, I'd like to ask you some questions about your son. Oh, yes, his sister's marrying a doctor. Got him. That was just a cute little slice of life.

That's like a Gilda Ratner character. The Second Times article that dovetails extremely nicely with the nearer article is another news article by Jonathan Martin. The headline, Stop Sanders Democrats Are Agonizing Over His Momentum. Again, just delicious Earl Gray here. Earl Gray. Earl Gray, hot. The real money paragraph here is, from canapé-filled fundraisers on the coasts to the cloakrooms

of Washington, mainstream Democrats are increasingly worried that their effort to defeat President Trump in 2020 could be complicated by Mr. Sanders in a political scenario all too reminiscent of how Mr. Trump himself seized the Republican nomination in 2016. Okay, I'll stop right there. Can anyone see the problem with that formulation, at least as far as Democrats go? They're worried that Bernie Sanders is going to be a repeat of Donald Trump, the guy who won the presidency. He fucking won.

Yeah, and the guy who's also doing an amazing job now. 2016, they've just decided to pretend it didn't happen. These people are more fixated on the 1972 presidential election than the one that happened three years ago. Well, it's a fascinating election. It's just like every single argument they make is rebutted by the simple words, Hillary lost. Everything you want to do is what Hillary did, and it failed.

Therefore, it can't work by definition. You fucking scumbags. But what if it worked? Yeah. Yeah, then you'd be saying the opposite. Continuing how, some Democrats are beginning to ask, do they thwart a 70-something candidate from outside the party structure who is immune to intimidation or incentive and wields support from an unwavering base without simply reinforcing the establishment is out to get me message,

the same grievance Mr. Trump used to great effect? But stopping Mr. Sanders, or at least preventing a contentious convention, could prove difficult for Democrats. He has enormous financial advantages already substantially outraising his Democratic rivals that can sustain a major campaign through the primaries. And he is well positioned to benefit from a historically large field of candidates that would splinter the vote. If he wins a substantial number of primaries and caucuses and comes in second and others

thanks to his deeply loyal base of voters across many states, he would pick up a formidable number of delegates. Oh no. Going on here, there is a growing realization that Sanders could end up winning this thing, or certainly that he stays in so long that he damages the actual winner, said David Brock, the liberal organizer, who said he had discussion with other operatives about an anti-Sanders campaign and believes it should commence sooner rather than later. So he's taking what he learned doing, rat fucking Anita Hill during the Clarence Thomas.

Again, just to remind you about David Brock, he was a Republican hatchet man. He was like a Roger Stone figure right up until he claims he had a conversion moment when he saw Pat Buchanan speak at the 1992 Republican convention and just incite a pogrom against gay people, which, fair enough, he feels personally attacked, but that was his motivation to become a Democratic party hatchet man. He's not a guy who like- He called Anita Hill a little bit nutty and a little bit slutty. No, and his also conversion took place far later than that because he was still going

after Clinton in the first few years of his administration, right? Yeah. He was part of the whole Arkansas project thing at the beginning. So just last thing I want to read from this here, it says, the matter of what to do about Bernie and the larger imperative of party unity has, for example, hovered over a series of previously undisclosed Democratic dinners in New York and Washington organized by the longtime party financier Bernard Schwartz. The gatherings have included scores from the moderate or center left wing of the party,

including Speaker Nancy Pelosi of California, Senator Chuck Schumer of New York, the minority leader, former Governor Terry McAuliffe of Virginia, Mayor Pete Buttigieg of South Bend, Indiana, himself a presidential candidate, and the president of the Center for American Progress, Nira Tan. There she is again. So again, it's hilarious that they really, and this is really fun to read because they are kind of checkmated in a way in terms of like, I mean, they're still going to attack him and try to defeat him with everything they've got, but they're checkmated in the

sense that like they've already said, if all of the rich people who donate to us and all the leaders of the party can't literally meet together in private dinners to find out a way to stop him from gaining the nomination. How can we do that without making it seem like that's what exactly what we're doing? Right. How do we wander our hand in this? Well, that's obviously working against him, just like we did in 2016. Well, that's not a checkmate.

That's called a zogzwang. If you're just some like lackey consultant and you just managed to like get into one of these dinners, like I'm sure there's a bunch of people who get in and get the dress up and get all excited about going and you just sit in a room and you're surrounded by all those people and then they get up and they're like, all right, so how are we going to prevent Bernie from winning? It's like, how do you not just be like, oh, I'm in the evil room. This is like the, this is like there's Kent Brockman and fucking Dr. Hibbert and just

birds and a vampire. Vampire. Vampire. Vampire. I mean, that's, it's like that. Who controls the British pound? Who keeps the metric system down? We do.

We do. It really is. But I like that they couch their concern in, well, we're worried that he's going to either damage the eventual nominee and make them lose, or he's going to get nominated and then lose to Trump. They're acting like the real concern is he's going to lose, but that is a hundred percent bullshit. The real concern is that he would win.

Yes. They would love it if he lost to Trump. That would be fantastic. Another four years where they don't have to do anything to govern and they get to ram it down our throats. Exactly. They would be, and you get to probably put paid to socialism for being a threat again for another 20 years.

They would love it if he lost to Trump. If Bernie wins, they are fucked, or it could be if he actually is serious about it. Here's the point I want to make about that, though, and Dave Weigel made this point, and I think he's exactly right. What they're really concerned about, but none of them are going to say, is that if Bernie gets the nomination, and it's, you know, like I said, like anything can happen. There's still a tunnel to go, but he is in a very strong position. He has got the pole position to fucking right now with his money, and the fact that he does

so well in caucuses, and the fact that there are so many other candidates to take this to the convention and leave with the nomination. They're too afraid to say, but what they're all thinking is that if that happens, then Howard Schultz is going to get in the race, split the vote, and ensure a Trump second term. However, Jacob Baccarac added a little to what Weigel said, and I think he actually has exactly right. What all these people are saying, when they're like, they're saying, we're worried about

Bernie in the general. What they're really saying is, I'm going to vote for and support Howard Schultz, ensuring Trump's second term, because I'm going to do everything possible to keep Bernie from becoming president, because that then, like, we vastly prefer Trump being president to him being president. Absolutely. That's why this article was both very encouraging to me, in a way, and also discouraging. It was encouraging because it really showed you, oh, he is a legitimate threat to this

fucking party structure. The argument that he is somehow a sheepdog for the Democrats, and he's just, like, herding all these potentially radical people away from, like, you know, a fucking PSL or something. He is clearly seen as an existential threat to this fucking party, which means great that's good. This party needs to die. But it also tells you that if he did get in there, he is going to be so fucking hamstrung by the fact that the people in his party are going to have no investment in his presidency

and, in fact, are going to have an investment in seeing him fail, which is going to be matched by the one that the Republicans have. So that's going to be very dangerous if he gets the vote. Not to mention also, and also to add to that, should he become president, he will immediately face a media that is more uniformly hostile to him than they are to Donald Trump in every regard, up and down. You know, that goes to show that these people need to not just be defeated in these primaries, they need to be evicted from the party, they need to be evicted from the coalition or the

canopy. And that's why CAP has to go. Because the thing is, Bernie exposes their impotence. Bernie doesn't need their money, he doesn't need their know-how, which they don't have any fucking know-how. And he doesn't need their votes because they're all on the fucking coasts. Yeah. Yeah.

Like their existence as, you know, hey, you need us because we're the ones that put things together to make it a party, otherwise it's just sort of a bunch of people aimlessly opposed to conservatives and with no ability to exercise political power. But Bernie's model is, no, you don't have to do this. You don't have to create this funnel, this laundering mechanism from corporations and from special interests connected to, you know, then take their money to create a party. You can create an alternative source of revenue, which means an alternative source of legitimacy. So I don't worry about them supporting Howard Schultz.

I mean, they should do what those, you know, labor rebels in the UK did and start the fucking problem solvers party that gets 2% of the vote. Yeah. I mean, the thing is, is that the whole theory of power with Bernie is that, I mean, yeah, if it was, if it was a typical Democrat Republican race, Bernie could end up losing to Howard Schultz sort of spoiling it 2000 nader style in reverse. That's possible, but the idea is that Bernie changes the electoral math because he appeals to people who otherwise wouldn't vote for a Democrat or otherwise wouldn't vote, which

means that that 2% who probably will vote for him in, you know, the suburb in Raytheon Acres, Northern Virginia, and, you know, both shoes, Rhode Island and stuff. But that will not impact the national popular vote because, or the national electoral college because Bernie's going to run up margins in a lot of states that are more a blue collar corner. Right. In other words, he causes a realignment. And the thing is, there is so much pressure on those who want to be Trump that I think

he has very little to worry about. I think potential Howard Schultz candidacy would take more from Trump's column overall. Yeah. But here's the thing, though, like all those people in those dinners, if Bernie gets the nomination, will either openly or tacitly support Howard Schultz. And all the people, the stop Sanders people who are obsessed with party unity and claim that they, they all claim to hate Bernie personally because they feel that he was a spoiler for Hillary Clinton, that he damaged her beyond recognition.

Even though he refused to talk about the giant ethical problem that was the huge albatross around her neck the entire year. They claim to not like him personally because, you know, of this or that or he's rude or mainly because they finger wagged or he acted as a spoiler. I mean, you shouldn't be fooled by that. They hate him because they hate his politics. They do not. They have a vested interest in Medicare for all or anything like that.

They want to prevent that from happening ever. And generally, as far as a leadership of the Democratic Party goes, have a vested interest in just not governing or not being responsible for governing. They do not want to be responsible. They do not want to be on the hook for running a country. No. Oh God. They were so horrified to get that supermajority in 2009.

They were just desperate to get rid of that thing. No, but like what's hilarious about this is like the thing that these people still, the reason why like if you still to this day search Susan Sarandon's name on Twitter, you will see some of the like most mind-melting drivel imaginable is because he was a spoiler. And they are going to absolutely try to do that against him. They would have no problem supporting or voting for Howard Schultz. That's what they're telling you is that if you work hard for Bernie and he runs a good campaign and gets a nomination, guess what?

I'm going to vote for Howard Schultz. That's what these people are telling you. They're not saying it openly, but if you read between the lines, it's not easy to figure out. No, they're right there. Yeah. Howard Schultz's campaign would be like great fodder for comedy, though. Like every time that dude steps in front of a camera, he says something that just is like

a shit dump. He is really dumb. He's very stupid. He's really stupid. He did a masterclass on like being an entrepreneur and it's him like trying to like fumbling with an espresso machine. Like he's trying to show how to make coffee. It's so silly.

I got to say, I think those defections would help Bernie, who would, you know, if he wins the nomination would, you know, face an immediate problem of solidifying his support in a party with, you know, people like that, because everyone recognizes, okay, we have a pressing existential need to defeat Trump. That's the one thing that has to happen. If Bernie wins fair and square and you're maybe, you know, like his policies, maybe a little waffling on him, well, you're really going to fucking hate the people who are just straight up traitors to that cause.

Absolutely. I also like the idea that if you, if you read a lot of these people long enough, you always see them come back to this idea that he was never vetted in 2016. And you know, if he's a nominee, oh man, what the Republicans are going to dig up about him. Did you know that he supported the Sandinistas in the 1980s? It's like, good. I'd like to have that debate where like the other side is like, yeah, we were pro-contras

in the 1980s. You know those guys who sold crack and murdered children and nuns and shit? Yeah. We literally like those guys. One last thing about Bernie this week, because it was the other big news from him and the campaign was his, the Fox News Town Hall that he did in Bethlehem, Pennsylvania, which, you know, leading up to it was, you know, controversial on the left because like there are people like, you can't legitimize Fox News, you can't legitimize the single biggest

fucking TV news channel on the, in the country. Highest rated one. Can't legitimize it. Highest youth reach too. Yeah. Can't, can't legitimize it. What about if, when Trump got mad at that segment, that was the angle he went with? Bernie went on and gave a platform to white naturalists, very, very, very gross.

Well, white male leftists should reconsider their actions. You know, it was very gross to legitimize this place that, you know, says some very, very, very bad things, nasty. Well, hilariously, like the idea that like this would help Fox News, all of the, like Trump was very angry about that. I really should tell you all you need to know, he was very mad, he felt betrayed by his friends at Fox News. He was pissed off at Brett Bear and the crowd and literally said that like there are many

people outside the panel that like outside they had Trump signs, they love, they love Trump. However, Fox viewers are pissed off about it too because they know how bad it makes them look. Yeah. That like, and literally the most common comment I've been seeing like in responding to this is people just saying, I made the switch to OAA and like the Mike Huckabee fucking evangelical news now.

Oh man. They're like, the media's fake news, Fox's phony news, the Mike Huckabee show is the only thing we can watch to get the real truth. Hell yeah. So I mean, this is even like, I'm sure it's like, it won't have any real effect on Fox News's bottom line, but it did, you know, it has opened up a pretty funny fracture in their own audience. And the second point I want to make is like, I watched that Bernie Sanders thing on Town

Hall, he fucking crushed it. Like his closing statement, I thought like literally I was like, he could be president if this is the message he goes with in the general watching just a couple of points. I think sometimes the divisions in this country get a little bit too hot. Okay. At the end of the day, we are all Americans who love this country. And I also think, and the media plays not a good role in this again, not just Fox, is we have a lot more in common than most people think we do.

All right. So should we raise the minimum wage to a living wage? Yes. Should we rebuild our crumbling infrastructure? Should we make sure that our veterans get the health care that they have earned? Should we make sure that we do not cut Social Security or Medicare or Medicaid? Should we give huge tax breaks to billionaires? You know, that's how most people feel.

So I hope, I hope, look, I'm looking forward to a good campaign and the last point that I want to make, and I thank Fox for the opportunity of being here. And that is, I want to see our country have the highest voter turnout in the industrialized world, not one of the lowest. So no matter what your views are, get involved in the political process, stand up and fight to make this a better country. Thank you all very much. I don't know.

Maybe I'm being too optimistic or something, but I thought it seemed like even the, even the organs that are hostile to Bernie had to give it up. Like Politico had a whole piece about how, yeah, he, he fucking killed it. What's funny now is all of the other struggling Democratic candidates saw that and are now like, well, yeah, I'm going to do a Fox News town hall and they're all, they're all going to get owns. So bad. Oh my God.

I'm humiliated. Yeah, Fox News audience, like, yeah, you're going to ace that. I do want to see Eric Swalwell bust out his team of rivals idea of putting Eric Swalwell is a congressman from Massachusetts and his California. No. Oh, right. Yeah. Yeah.

He's California and he is running. He's doing one of those things where he's just going to have one issue like Jay Inslee is the climate change guy. He is the gun control guy. He's running. Parkland teens following him around like a school of fish. He, he, and he's kind of smart because it's a very highly emotive issue. It's a super partisan issue that is very weighted towards like Democrats rank it highly.

They have a lot of emotion around it. It doesn't offend any of the big donor groups like our health insurers don't give in the fossil field industry. Don't give a shit about fucking gun control and Bernie is waffled on it and he, that's like, they pointed about who he's not. He doesn't have an F from the, from the NRA, you know, so it's, it's, it's kind of a decent wedge issue, but he also has now said that he wants to appoint Republicans plural to his cabinet to show the way we can cross over party lines.

And I just think if you hear that and you think that's what we need, you will have a putting brain. You're a baby. You're a moron baby. Yeah. He said, you're not just a baby. You're a stupid baby. You're a baby.

The other maybe babies make fun of for being a moron. Yeah. You're a baby and you're listening to this. You're valid. I see you. Swalwell said, I want to make a team of rivals, which Obama also said after he was elected. I never understood why that was persuasive. Because it's Doris.

It's Doris Kirk. It's a good word. I know. I know what the reference is. It's just, I like the idea of a team of rivals if it's like young, sexy hotshots, you know, and they're going to do a bank job. Yes. And they're brave.

Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. One last job. Yeah. The idea of the book, because, I mean, at least Obama, you could argue his team of rivals

thing was based more on the book, which was popular right around when he got elected. Because it was about personal rivalries. Like William Seward was the guy that Lincoln just beat for the Republican nomination. And so they had that enmity. But it was not ideological rivalry. They were all on the same side. They were all fucking Republicans or they were former Democrats who had moved to the Republican party.

They were all pro union. I mean, they were all on board with, with the fucking program. The modern idea of team of rivals would be like, if Abraham Lincoln put Jefferson Davis and exactly what the fuck are you doing? Clement Van Lanningham is fucking, it was actually, it was like when they made Johnson his VP and how the fuck did that turn out? So that's the pitch that will work on me. If it's like an Ally McBeal thing, it's, you know, rivals in the boardroom, friends in

the bedroom. Oh my God, dude, could you imagine if like Ray LaHood fucked a Kathleen Sibblis sexual attention there? So fucking hot, dude. I love it. Thank you. I, the Fox Town Hall, I'm most excited to see. I think the Buttigieg one is going to be more boring than you think because Buttigieg, she's

a lot of the way that conservatives talk about him now reminds me of how conservatives talked about Obama in like 2005, 2006, where they're like, sort of neutral to positive on him now. Like I thought it was very notable how Ben Shapino talked about him. If you remember, Obama got a lot of like positive play after like the perp America speech. But it's going to be a lot more boring than you think is Buttigieg is a robot. He's a killer. You know, he knows exactly how to say whatever, bullshit, whatever fucking stupid audience he's been in front of because he's been like, Buttigieg is like, he's like, you know, Floyd

Mayweather grew up in a storied boxing family and he was taught from like a young age how to jab and he always held up his shoulder the right way from every waking moment was spent preparing for prize fights. And that's how Buttigieg is with job interviews. He would just wear like little sailor suits. He had like a little he had a little like a little fucking busy, you know, busy box and I had like a fake LinkedIn screen on it, but he had a speed bag. But for the question, what's your greatest weakness?

I volunteer too much. I I am most excited for Inslee's town hall. That's the guy who talked about accidentally seeing porn with his mom during his kickoff. That was Hickenlooper. That's the other script, Western governor, two of them, one of them should dance. No one knows which one is which you just do it. No one knows which one is which, but they're very different because Jay Inslee is the climate change guy.

He's about all about climate change and Hickenlooper literally drank fracking fluid to prove to people it was safe. Oh, yeah. He's fracked the entire state of Colorado and just it's going to collapse into a giant sinkhole. It's going to open the hollow earth. Yeah. Fucking.

All right. Denver Airport, of course. For journalistic purposes, we're going to say they both saw a deep throat with their moms. This is mandated by the FEC or yeah, FEC is a fairness doctrine. Every candidate saw a bang bus with their mom. I mean, I guess the last thing I'll say about the Fox News shit is that Fox News obviously is a reprehensible institution that has done incalculable damage to our culture and politics.

But if you're going to make that argument that you can't engage them in any way, then you better fucking make that argument for NBC, CNN, and all the major networks and other cable use networks because they're all on that spring point. Really what you're saying is that it's only because Fox is the openly racist one that makes it the no-go zone or whatever, but for instance, what all the networks or the New York Times, for instance, did in the run-up to the Iraq War, yeah, we're pretty much okay with that. That bridge is still okay to cross. I think you could say arguing long terms in terms of the role that Fox News had in softening

the brains of the boomers of this country, that they are more responsible in a general sense for Trump's presidency, but if you want to say which news network in 2016 was more directly responsible for Trump, it was fucking CNN. Jeff Zucker admitted it. They're like, this is great. We love the Trump campaign. It's huge ratings. It's electric.

They covered him all the time. Everything. He had more free fucking advertising than anybody else could buy combined. All of those other 16 people, and that's because CNN decided that it wasn't worth not focusing on every insane jabbering thing he said, and that just took the air out of the entire fucking campaign because it was all going into Trump's giant mouth. You can't just say that this is Fox News. All these fucking institutions sucked absolute dick.

Yeah. If you're going to make a structural analysis, you would have to conclude that all of the capitalist press is your enemy and a detriment to our society. You want to talk about melting brains. How about fucking Facebook? The nightly viewership of Fox News is less than 1% of the population. The other thing is, I would say that, look, if it's a question of should you be interviewed by Fox News if you're a leftist or interviewed by Tucker Carlson, for instance, then I would

say no. There's no point in doing that because he's just going to shorn into whatever ridiculous scenario that he's doing. He has leftists on there so that they can criticize liberals, but only in a way that will lie with his critique. As far as Fox News as an institution goes, if you're running for president of the United States, it is the biggest cable news network. The idea that by boycotting it, as you said about, the DSA people are going to stop buying

catheters and gold coins, and rascal scooters from the people who fucking fund Fox News. Putting all my Iraqi dinars in a bonfire. It's silly, and how well Bernie did in that forum speaking to that audience. Like I said, on a major, the biggest American cable news network, to respond to a question about Medicare for All in two unbroken minutes, which you never, ever get to do on any cable news. Based on concision, you have to say things in 17 seconds or less, but to have two minutes to explain something like Medicare for All to a national audience, I think was incredibly

useful and good. You want to talk about what's more embarrassing, but you've seen these fucking CNN town halls where every single fucking person asking a question is a fucking intern on Capitol Hill. So yeah, but I guess as long as we're talking about the malign influence of the media in our country. Yeah, man. Can someone build a media that works? Somebody has.

No, we're sitting here with Nick Hayes, who has done just that with Means TV. You may have seen some of these videos on Twitter with friends of the show Street Fight, Josh Androski, Sara June. You know, you probably hear people constantly talking about this horrible thing called capitalism. I have. Yeah, you've heard that? Yes. You're like, how does capitalism affect me?

I will tell you, it runs your entire fucking life. When you wake up in the morning and you feel like shit and you have to wipe the sleep from your eyes and like look around and be like, why does this have to happen this early in the morning? That's a capitalism and it controls everything like your healthcare, your education. It all comes down to making money, but some things just don't make money. Nick, you just like tell us a little bit about like, first of all, for anyone who doesn't know what is Means TV and like what you guys are trying to do with this, this new platform.

Yeah. Yeah, Means TV is a project Naomi, who's my partner, and I started like a year and a half ago around the time like we were starting to get involved in like electoral politics stuff. So like before we did the video for AOC, we were kind of like, we need like a media platform that doesn't suck shit. Wait, pause. Just so like in case you're not aware, Nick, you guys, you did the like the major AOC campaign

video that everyone saw. Yes. That was you guys. Yep. Yeah. That was very effective. And building our national profile before the primary. Yeah.

Like, yeah. We reached out to her when she had like 8,000 followers. So it was, that was really big. And then we did like Kaniella Ng's video, which was just trying to like bury like all the slander basically like Hawaiian media had been pushing about him. And you did that. And you did that AOC video basically at cost. You basically lost money.

Yeah. Yeah. No, definitely we did. Yeah. We just did that because she ruled and because there was no like the only people we saw doing video on the left for like even like leftist socialist people like also did shit for like Wells Fargo and stuff. Yeah.

And it's like that doesn't square. So yeah, we did, we started doing like electoral stuff and we were like, wow, this is like we're making a lot of impact here. Like this is really cool. But we also want to do some stuff sort of outside of like electoral politics space because like politics is boring and annoying and you get burned out on it really quickly. So we basically started trying to leverage like our political contacts, people we worked with and shoot some different stuff like with Kanyela Ng with Street Fight with all those

guys. Like the model is a kind of like a cooperative of people who produce and you know, edit and share like these videos and then it's based on like you guys are getting from like subscriptions and Yeah. Like we're a worker co-op, which we are advocating as like the model for digital media now. Like we're seeing digital media jobs like only becoming like harder to maintain. Like nobody can keep a digital media job for more than a fucking year.

And cannibalized by venture entrepreneurs and capitalist firms as they pick the bones off of you know, you know, once proud organizations or not so cool. Yeah. Exactly. So yeah, the whole thing is like we're worker owned. So anybody that's like, anybody that's a full-time employee at the company within a certain period of time gains access to a percentage of the profit and equal voting power as anybody else in the company.

So we saw over the last couple of weeks the Street Fight video explaining in their own way you know what capitalism is but like as this goes forward like what's on the horizon like what kind of stuff are you guys going to come out with. Yeah. So we're doing, this campaign is basically like a proof of concept because when we say anti-capitalist entertainment to people, people don't know what that is and so this is trying to show people like this is what we could have you know if we were to sort of fund and invest in like a structure like this.

But the end goal of Means TV like what we're working to raise money for is a platform like Netflix sort of a digital streaming service that you can go to that you can pull up on your Apple TV that you can pull up on you know your phone or whatever and you can watch like movies, TV shows, reality shows about workplaces being unionized like animated shows about like people like Elon Musk being shitheads like it's a place for leftists and it's also just a place anybody can go and like watch some shit that isn't like aggressively individualistic or militaristic or. Or like if you are you know have creative pursuits or like you like doing animation

or videos or things like that this could be a place that you could potentially pitch to and a platform where people could see your work if you wanted to create it or maybe even get money for it. Yeah we do we take pitches and we like work with people to develop those and develop budgets for those projects like you know not only are we trying to like provide people with anti-capitalist entertainment but we want to create a place where like if you're like a person like me who's just staring down the digital media landscape right and like it's like okay I can go cut ads for the Saudi empire for violence.

Or my wrists. Yeah right right it's like there's there's it's such a bleak landscape there just has to be another option for like young people like people will then sort of anti-capitalist politics to go and add something creatively. This very ambitious producing all of these programs producing a full slate of programming for a streaming service that's obviously very expensive even if you're doing a lot of stuff in the house how do you make this into a self-sustaining enterprise. So a big part of that is I think being clear with people what we are and what we're trying

to do which is we are explicitly political we like are anti-capitalist we are socialist we work with communists with anarchists we are a multi-tendency big platform or big tent platform right and I think that's why like like we were just talking about Fox News it's like Fox News tells you what the fuck they are you know and like you know where CNN is like we're unbiased and it's like you're not though and I think just being honest with people and being like this is our perspective this is where we come from goes a long way but the actual funding of projects and stuff like that will be subscription based basically like we're going to be always putting out free videos and kind of infotainment stuff

just to like bring new people into the fold of like leftism but we'll also be creating like a paywall system basically. And why make a streaming service from scratch instead of say a YouTube channel or a Twitch stream? I mean YouTube can just take your shit down as they are like YouTube if they don't like your stuff they can just take it down and I think there's a lot of power to be built on YouTube but it's a corporate platform I mean I'm getting recommended Jordan Peterson videos after I watch a street fight what is cap per yeah you know me so it's just it's

like that platform is they know that their viewership is coming from these kind of alt right channels and that's what they're pushing in algorithms and it's like you see people like contra points who are doing a great job of beating that back but I think YouTube is so personality focused and so like I'm talking to camera for 30 minutes about just like some you know whatever that sort of expanding that imagination a little bit and being like what if we also had TV shows and movies and like web series and animated shows and all these different sorts of things that we've never had like also similar to what we talked about with with contra points like the vast majority of the content on YouTube is just unwatchable

dreck with zero production value thought or care put into it at all it's just like yeah it's not very inspiring so talking to his laptop you know whereas like you know doing something a little bit more artistic merit or value to it or just you know production yeah I mean that's in the left has been you know it may be rightfully so a little bit but kind of cast as this like lazy like kind of incompetent like we go check but it's like we're not like we have people every you know leftists are everywhere like leftists are the most creative people in our society like making the best art and it's kind of always been that way but there's we've always had to work through these hyper capitalist structures

and platforms where you know our ideas are stifled or they're gone through they go through a corporate filter and they're suddenly anti-worker when maybe we set out to make something different and that's I think what like me as a young person like looking at like how do I plug in and try to like make an impact in media it's like oh I just don't I just eat shit for like my whole adult life and then I'd like retire I guess maybe but probably not so it's it's yeah like a platform for us to be able to build power in visual media in like a highly produced way in a way that feels like familiar to just like your average person and you know to the example of like you know how this is this is all very ambitious but

like you know how do you make it so sustaining you know like the model of like small donors or some monthly subscriptions I mean shit like this show is a fucking like prime example of how that can fucking work because like the show wouldn't be successful if we had done it through like a medium where like we weren't in control of like you know like our our own content and how it was done yeah I also just wanted to pop in and say because Nick and I were discussing this right before we came here about how in terms of sustaining and building something when you look at even like I don't know any other form of corporate online media we were talking specifically about vice like we just heard today that vice live went

under and power yeah and obviously we're all extremely sad about that we're crying right now it was my favorite nightly program but like you know all those companies are built rather by designer in the end to just like cut the base production as low to the bone as possible and funnel all the money up to this top like six people with the sometimes the explicit goal of eventually harvesting and selling it change Smith yeah yeah yeah we were just talking before we like started like could you describe like like how means TV let's say how your approach differs from the I don't know the vice model for instance yeah I mean the biggest difference is that we're not a pyramid scheme we're not like selling

we're not going to investors we're not going to investors but we're also not going to investors and being like we're going to bring millennials back to cable television knowing damn well that will never happen you know means TV promise number one we are not a pyramid scheme exactly TV promise number two our co-founder is not a neo-nazi really but yeah if you're just like if you're operating like a cop from a very basic basic level you don't have to worry about whether or not it's all going to just be taken apart by investors you know two years down the line once it's proven successful because that's not the model of the company I think that that is like a single fundamental having worked in online web media for a long

time that is like the single greatest difference that you could ask for you know that as a creator your content is like there to be supported and it is the lifeblood of the platform. So I guess just to close out Nick I want to thank you so much for joining us and all the great work you've done with means TV but you know for our listeners if they want to check out means TV or like subscribe review as they say where do they what do they do. Yeah so we're actually doing a fundraiser right now you can go to means.media we've raised over $50,000 already and we're trying to raise close to $500,000 to fund our first year of TV shows movies reality shows animations all that stuff so means.media is where you

can find that stuff and then you can also check us out on YouTube we have the channel with the original Neon Cat video thanks to Sara June which has been a huge huge boon to the YouTube channel and to the meme the online left meme culture one of the all time great memes mm-hmm so I would I would check us out there and we're at means underscore TV on Twitter and thanks guys for having me on the talk about it absolutely thank you and before we go let's go give us those beautiful plugs let's plug it up oh boy we have a bevy of plugs today first off as you might have heard we're going to Europe the American expeditionary farce nine will be in holiday Berlin Germany on June 1st Glasgow Scotland

June 3rd London June 5th Manchester June 7th closing things out Dublin Ireland June 9 tickets go on sale this Friday you can find them when they go live at chapotraphouse.com slash tour uh also you know while you're there subscribe to our newsletter just go on chapotraphouse.com just like a little link at the bottom right there and if you're in Europe you have no excuse for not coming to one of these shows now that place has fucking trains and who doesn't love traveling up by rail the gentleman's carriage I'm not a fuck if you're in Europe if you're in the Middle East if you're in East Asia guess what it's called Eurasia it's the same continent take a train walk drive fuck you come plug number two mayday mayday

we are doing a live show at the housing works cafe and we do have a correction in Brooklyn the one in Manhattan it is a 126 Crosby Street in the lower east side you can get tickets at the link embedded in the description of this episode or go to chapo mayday trivia dot splash that dot com I believe some tickets are still available this is a benefit for housing works and we'll be doing pub trivia yeah all of us will write a 10 question category of our own how long do I have to do that yes you do and you know I said how long do I have dumbass till mayday the yeah I'm the dumbass it's literally called a mayday show you fucking idiot also come up oh I don't celebrate that holiday could be any day in May 31 days in

May there could be any of them Felix the questions can't all be about fortnight or game of thrones no they can this is Felix yeah nobody's going to be able to answer any of these maybe one person you think I give a fuck if they're stupid or not that's not my problem that's there that's taking up with their parents their IQs are that bad it's really nothing I can do about it plug number three we are doing a live show in Ithaca New York on the evening of April 26 that's this week it will be a Cornell University thrill one tower road room 105 it is sold out on event bright but I kind of think they were free there so any any wag could have just reserved a ticket even if they're in Tacoma yeah with some bastardly

proud boys as I understand it it's a late April Fool's joke my bad it's captain 140 people first come first seated maybe there's a standby if you want to come check it out and if you can't get in well there's a nice slope you can hang out on and this is for closing out Union days 2019 that is a that's a thing that they do at Cornell it's about unions unions and how they're good final plug of the evening this one's fun our friends at Decrim NY which is an organizational coalition through policy advocacy community organizing public education working to improve the lives of people who perform sexual labor by choice circumstance or coercion it is a union of sex workers and allies three goals decriminalization

decarcerization and destigmatization of the sex rates in New York they are do I know these organizers and they have been doing phenomenal work in terms of applying a great deal of public pressure towards what seemed unthinkable about a year ago which is decriminalization of sex work in New York and they're hoping to become a national organization they are doing a fundraiser to keep the lights on because this is this organization advocacy is very expensive work and you the listener can get something very special if you donate for $50 okay so Virgil did a shit job of explaining what this is and asked me to record a pickup explaining what the gift is we are going to record a podcast episode with will Matt Felix

and Virgil and then I'm going to have my friends at a cassette tape label press this podcast episode into 100 unique cassette tapes after that I will destroy the digital file of this podcast it will only exist as cassette tapes and if you donate to this charity fundraiser we will send you one of these 100 absolutely limited completely unlistnable unless you have the physical object cassette tapes and they will be packaged with nice cool trippy art and yeah back to Virgil it will never be released digitally it is going into the k-tel vault if you want to hear it you must donate $50 so please it's a very good cause please go to the link embedded below and even if you can't donate $50 you know donate whatever

you can those are the plugs thanks again to nick from means TV very cool project we hope you guys will all check out and till next time boys yeah love you yeah