Chapo Trap House - 380 - Our Dumb Decade (12/30/19)

Episode Date: December 31, 2019

We recap and review the 2010's. SEE US LIVE:Feb 1 - Iowa City, IA - Englert Civic TheaterFeb 9 - Derry, NH - Tupelo Music HallFeb 18 - Las Vegas, NV - House of BluesALL TICKETS ON SALE NOW AT http://chapotraphouse.com/tour/

Hey everyone before we get started here a we are Going to New Hampshire, Iowa and Nevada in February We've got live shows tickets on sale a chapeau trap house dot-com Slash tour will be there for the Iowa caucus will be there for the New Hampshire primary We'll be there for the Nevada caucus to caucuses and a primary wonderful delightful love to see it Come see us to caucuses one primary my favorite web video chapeau trap house comm slash tour All right

Let's uh, let's go soundcheck here test test test one two three three three More one one one two two three four five will will will turn the will up in my head hey hey Matt you there moh-tada moh-tada moh-tada and finally Radios, Virgil, Texas. Oh, hey everybody. Yeah, could not get Patriot Awards on Fox Nation That was one time only telecast kind of kind of upset. We all slept on that one. Well, who won the Patriot Award? The Patriots the New England Patriots. I actually know who won it's That it's this kid who went door to door to tell his neighbors to put up flags awful child Some like veteran who's like running for office Eddie Gallagher

Yeah, and most no-scope head shops the guy who made what the fuck's it called? That casual dining restaurant. We've got a oh, yes Mission BDQ. Oh my god Which is which is low in action pointed out in his article about the Patriot Awards. It's like funded by Goldman Sachs Yeah, no, it's a it's a pure. It's a pure cynical fucking Exploitation of national Rube culture. It's like, hey, we're the evil vampire squid Jewish financiers that you have nightmares about but we know that you Hicks love your flag and your fucking a boiled pork It's not here. I'm here. We're combining them for your pleasure. The guys I found I don't even veterans. They're like McKinsey type

One of them worked for Outback Steakhouse is it guess what he's not Australian either it always confused me why the Outback Steakhouse commercials are clearly a American now where else just right by American guy putting on an Australian accent That was actually Russell Crowe that was Well, no, and then you took over from him. That's actually people don't know that about you You're actually the richest one of us. It's a little boy Matt gets most of his work actually doing voice acting for like doing, you know flawless accent. So you're a dialogue coach Yeah, I work with that guy at the YouTube videos the vanity fair. Yeah. Yeah, yeah

Uh, Virgil, can you just bad rules just right? What what were the Patriot awards that you say Louie? Oh, okay, so You know how and again you should just read low and options Alex Nichols article in the outline about it You know how every time the Oscars happen conservatives always bitch that like how come there isn't an Oscars for first responders I'm like that. Well, we're gonna award best picture to the troops. Yeah, well, this was Fox Nation the Fox News streaming service That was their attempt to call that bluff and in St. Petersburg, Florida a month ago. They held the inaugural Patriot Awards which was

Exactly what it fucking sounds like it's like C-list box Categories though was there were there losers with their nominations like like someone they got raw there were losers I don't know Patriot of the year who watched it. Yeah, I don't actually think they were shortlist I mean this this is this is this is like the lowest kind of content This is like just absolute fucking swat up. This is the crocodile of television entertainment I mean there was like there's like that old like SNL sketch about like the like the very very early espi awards and the awards were like tallest player in the NBA

They just list the nominees and they're like it goes to minute bold just just because he is there were The whole thing's totally arbitrary. They just booked some you know people like the flag kid who was like a feel-good story on Fox News Okay, so the big winner was a kid who walked around his neighborhood knocking on doors trying to get people to put fucking flags up in front Of their house. Yeah, that and the mission barbecue guys and some troops. I guess and so maybe a few first responders diamond and silk were there I think Tommy Laren was there. We like I Peter hog hog warts. Yeah, Peter Yeah, you're Hagfish. He was the host. Isn't he another war criminal Navy seal? He was the guy who got them all off. He was the one who made it his mission He was also a troop too. Sure, but I don't know about his specific work rise

But I do know that he is by the way who will go on Fox and would look say mr. President if you're what watching what she 100% was Free my man will and that is the big reason honestly He is probably more responsible than for anything from than anyone for those fucking pardons happening Pete will Pete hog show her is He's a he's a mayor Pete type He's like a troop who went to fucking Oxford and shit or Princeton something like that Tom Cotton type Yeah, the worst type really the worst type you could be yeah So we're all really bummed because I just subscribed to Fox Nation to try to watch

a Patriot Awards and It's not on there. It was a one-time only event And you know what I find that charming in this era of streaming content where everything's available Bingeably at the touchy of your finger Here's something that was still had to be a moment of of collective experience in this era Like a Tibetan sound Monday Like a calm Sky it's just a beautiful moment in this era when people expect their paid subscription

Streaming services to have videos and content It's refreshing to just have some nice piece When I was when I was signing up for the Fox Nation It said that the the current like top videos to watch right now are a Bing Crosby Christmas And the Johnny Cash Christmas special It's just like yeah, that's the original content that you're getting. How many people do you think have died watching a Fox Nation? Assisted suicides They should have a channel or like a tv show or a stream

That is just all commercials from like the 1950s and 60s. Oh, yeah, or people just watch it and they just feel calm Chesterfield They can just watch that uh that just east music video Winston tastes good like a Cigarette should I want my maple Um, so it's so it's New Year's Eve guys. Yay Party and counting down all those acquaintances. They've been forgot. Should we should we get started with this? Yeah, let's pop Let's pop some balls. This is our this is the this is the chopper New Year's

Poppin bottles, huh poppin bottles, huh? Let's let's pour up So nice sparkling wine that does not violate any EU regulations on naming Oh for me It'll be that it'll be that soon enough like chicken frying Anyway, yeah, um, I don't know if you guys can hear in the background, but we're at a very cool party right now We're in the exclusive This is the elite podcasting though, but the only podcasters are allowed into we're we're banging on the bathroom doors trying to get all Our girlfriends to stop hanging out with the weekend

Yeah, no, it's sick though. It's a good party, but we're taking I think there's some time off on this New Year's Eve to bring it in for you guys With this podcast. You guys ever get bummed out that there's only one New Year's song? Yeah, there should be more. They're really it's a great time. Um, I don't know. Okay. Well, thanks. I'm there's princes 1999 Yeah, but that's only for one year ever Well, I think that I think no, I think that counts as any and you can play that song in a new year's Well, he should have, uh, you know recorded different versions of just like each successive year And that they probably would have charted every year. Well, you know, prince is such a perfectionist

You know, he probably would have done where they whereas they should have just you know edited in 2007 So all like saying that was a poem by uh, the scottish national poet ravi burns, right? Yeah, and uh, ravi burns. He was uh You know, he was a big cultural figure in scotland. Uh, he died and the uh Year after he died, you know on the anniversary of his death His friends got together at his house and threw a dinner party in his honor and do that every year And it eventually became like a big celebration like a national ravi ravi burns day is ravi burns day

And that is like essentially the scottish national holiday. I mean excuse to get drunk and fist fight your dad But you know, uh, like all holidays are And I don't know I was you know, I always really like that idea like if you know, if if I died I would hope that everyone would just get together in my apartment and you know There's still a party in my honor and keep doing it until it becomes a national holiday. Yeah, just keep just keep on doing it I will I will you know, I don't want to jinx anything, but I will commit to that right now. Well, thank you I think I think we can make that happen for you. You will be our poster laureate Actually, I don't know I

Kind of think it'd be nice if You know, I could be alive to see it Take your own death Well, I mean, I also feel like Tom Sawyer. Yeah, I don't want to hide. I want to like hang out at the party Something's fun now that I'm thinking about it. You know, all my friends getting together throwing a party. So let's just have a party then Yeah, I think I should just have a party. I'm sorry Virgil. This is yeah, you could just have a party But uh, the rub here is that I'm I will commit to this but only if you're dead So it's sort of a catch-22 that you've got. Sorry. I tricked yourself into a situation

Where the only way you can get will to show up to a party is but yeah, sorry Oh, no, it'll be super sick dude. It'll be like, you know, reach upon models I'll make everyone wear cat ears. It'll be super in latex. It'll be super sexy. Everyone has a whippet canister You'll be buried in a giant whippet canister Oh, that sounds great. No, it'll be like it'll be like, uh, the Viking funeral We'll just set you out on like a sort of like a beautiful like carved wooden, you know, sort of craft shape like a jewel Uh, but they'll eat but it'll be you'll be poured it'll be filled with your body with just um An unspent unused whippet canisters and then I'll lob some sort of explosive at it and it will just blow up

in a giant cloud of a frozen nitrous gas Virgil chunks, it sounds great. If you're out there listen to this, you know, uh first annual first annual Virgil Texas Day and the anniversary of my death You should you know, you should hold your own sympathy party as well. Let's get it going. Yeah Yeah, but I gotta yeah, I gotta have a song for it. You know, yeah a song composed of all your great posts Yeah, I don't know like like, you know, because probably burns had all lang signs. So yeah Well, that is so to get to his level of renown. You have to have your own new years. I've got it. I'll just use all lang signs Yeah, what's he gonna do?

So yeah, the beauty part is is that the copyright has long since lapsed that is public domain We could get weird owl Yankevich to do sort of like a parody version of uh old lang sign for you That'd be great. I would love to hear that. I can just hear that accordion wailing in my head A polka version. Yeah. All right, so well It's new year's eve and it's a special new year's eve because not only are we closing out a year We're closing out a decade. Yeah. Got another one. I mean some sticklers will say Technically not and I understand that they are these all the people that were like 2001 Yes, the thing is there is something to that because there is no zero zero

Not yet There will be very soon Matt. Oh god. Yes very soon the day of cleansing will come Well, all the matters is if you're planning on like starting some kind of publication or institution or something You got to do it now so you can say that spans two decades So I think for you this is one of those things where you know, people use literally figuratively Well, we're going to use the figurative version of a decade. So it's the end of the decade Well, yeah, it's we're crossing over into 2020. It's no longer the we've passed through the aughts We've now been through the teens now. We're entering the you know, the 20s the 20s

The first one that just comes off the tongue. Yeah, exactly. Finally. We don't have to say aughts Which is awful or teens are awful. I feel like we've made it this far Really never fully addressed what we call these decades and I honestly think that's part of the reason that it feels like there is no distinction Yeah, such like blur and you can't really like it doesn't have the segmentation of like 80s 90s or whatever Yeah, and part of that is because they fucking it's awkward and weird to say it. Yeah, so it just smears together Uh, I really hope now that we're back in a nameable decade. We can bring back One of my favorite 90s things which is people going. Hey, babe. It's the 90s. Yeah. Hey, it's the 20s It's 20 man. It's the 20s. You know what it is. Yeah, we don't even yeah

You heard of the roar in 20s. Well, welcome to the tweet in 20s It's going to be a decade of tweets And spoofs and goofs. No, it's not the last decade was decade of tweets. Yeah, we are Yeah, no, it's only going to be even more now or it's going to be if these trends continue. Hey The continued relevance of twitter will go up up up Um, no, but uh, I guess what I want to do now is um Take a look back at the decade that was This is a courtesy of the the wall street journal. I'm just looking here

What was news What was new what was news the decade's biggest story? The decades biggest stories a timeline of the past 10 years Told through the wall street journals coverage, you know, this is this is a paper of record here This is a timeline of the news stories that uh, according to wall street journal Not the paper of record. Uh, well, it's one of them. But a paper. It's a paper a paper Well, I don't know. I couldn't find the new york times version of this. So they snooze. We lose Um, anyway, um, and what's interesting about this is, you know, most of this decade

Was what I call pc pre choppo. Yes This is a lot of stuff happened before I, you know, really even knew you guys Those people were going around and they didn't know how to think about it What to feel about it because we weren't there to tell them. I know so, uh, what do you what do you say guys? You want to like just I'm gonna just go through I'm gonna read each one of these things that you know defined our decade If you have any reminiscences about them or thoughts or a little flashback If you remember them at all, you know, just a sound off. So beginning with

2010 the first Big important story of this past now over decade January 27th Apple takes big gamble on ipad Steve jobs unveils tab. Oh remember he was that was he was still alive then Steve jobs unveils tablet computer starting at $499, but must convince consumers they need another gadget And he does well done. He did it. Yeah, convince them and I got to say

I remember there was a lot of skepticism about the ipad Both because of the name a lot of people were like, oh lol. Do you mean like uh tampax? And also What it was just it was too big to be a phone. It was too small to be a computer. So what was the point? But it turns out people like that and that that was fitting hitting a groove for several people I'll tell you what the point is. It's uh, yeah too big for a phone too small for a computer Just right for reading my mangas That is I think what it mostly is

Okay, march 23rd 2010 Obama signs healthcare bill into White house guys, we did it. Do you remember when we could fucking get stuff done at this matter when people were uninsured? Oh, the horrible days when there was people getting going bankrupt because of health care costs white house ceremony seals big political victory But republicans aim to tap discontent over issue to rouse voters Spoiler alert they did uh, you know those uh, those far-sight cartoons where you just have like a whimsical scene in the caption would just be trouble brewing That's the

Larson cartoon is like obama signing the bill with like the republican caucus staring over. He's signing a bill But it's in a room full of cows. Yes Everyone biden tapped on his shoulder and said this is a big A big fucking deal. This is a big fucking deal Of course the the signature and probably only domestic policy achievement of the obama era But basically destroyed now largely, uh cannibalized Total failure total failure kind of some of the bugs because you know, biden has his own health care policy there's something like a public option. Yeah, and

Okay How come nobody holds his feet to the fire and say all right? So you're like implicitly admitting that obama care was not good. Yeah, like they did not do the thing You all promise it would do which is end, you know The the state of people being uninsured. I know we've talked about this before but this is a fun remembrance Uh, when they do a bit when they when they debuted the obama care website Oh, that was awesome and fucking Ezra Klein and those guys were like nutting in their pants about how cool and fun it was

Yeah, oh, you can check out what kind of plan, but it was like the website was a fucking Correct. Oh, it's just like it still sucks. Like there's like the Hindenburg And even like just you're just not fun to watch you're just talking you're just talking about the interface being alienating or whatever Let's not forget dude. Let's not forget that when they fucking launched it. It didn't work. Yeah. Oh, it collapsed I would say that that is a top obungal the website Absolute top number one. Oh bungles because it seems like something that should be so controllable It's you literally had one job. You run the federal government make a website. All the walks loved it They were like, this is like a spreadsheet

Oh, do I decide uh to gamble Do I survive to pay more money than I afford each month to get covered? Or do I gamble on a high-ass deductible plan that I'm you know, not going to get hit by a car Yeah, that's that's really it when they're talking about health care choice Yes, you know to to individual consumers on the market or even a lot of people with insurance Whose insurer says, okay, you got to pick from these two fucking plans one with you know High monthly premiums low deductible one of the high deductible low monthly premiums choices. Just triage. No choices is gambling It's straight up just a fucking gamble. Uh my unhealthy right now. Am I gonna need health care?

That's it But if you're in a socialized system, you don't have to weigh those things You don't have to weigh them against each other Well, right because obviously the health insurers they they make their nut off Fucking us not being able to price risk correctly. Yes. I want the bronze plan with the high premiums I want garnet for rebounds And the tip off Um, okay. Yeah, obama care. Remember that one. Okay, so

April 15th Iceland volcano halts europe flights. Oh, I remember that ash from eruptions just across the continent The name of the volcano unprecedented airspace closure. Well, could you read me the name of the volcano? I did not see the name of the volcano. Oh, come on. It's got that was part of the reason it was a story It's because how funny the volcano. Let me see if I can find it Rick's your oh my god under the this is just a string of fucking letters. This is just read it. Just read it Asia fall joe cojo coal See, I remember when everyone was having fun with that the first time

Uh, memory. I mean, I just remember seeing some very cool like satellite footage. There was a very good photograph. It's like the what if god We're smoking a blunt Getting high that's what it would look like. Yeah, right really did screw up all those flights because all those flights, you know They go over Iceland. They go over. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I remember seeing Iceland on one of our trips to uh, Britain when you fly right over it. I've been there. Uh, by the way, um, I would uh, would love to perform in uh, rakevick We should do it. Absolutely do it. Um, but you know, again I seem to be clear here for those who keep asking us like why don't you come to the south? Look We negotiated a contract that we had to sign

It's it's legally binding. We can't get out of it. We took it very seriously But like it's just it's just a matter of of the contract We have to perform in wellington Auckland, sydney, melbourne, Copenhagen, Amsterdam, Helsinki, Oslo, um, rakevick, Moscow, Singapore Singapore, St. Petersburg, St. Petersburg, um, Prague, Tokyo with an option to do Kyoto Um, yeah, and then yoyo kyo Yeah, neo tokyo. Yeah, exactly before Yeah, before we can do a single show in the american south or texas. I'm sorry. It's a bummer man

We we just we signed we also have to if I could go back in time and take that back I I wouldn't have signed it. I would have come and performed in in in raleigh We we would have to clean we have to clean the outskirts stables Uh, we have to fight that giant bore. Yeah, sorry. We've got a lot of things we got to do before I would have said no, sir. I care about our fans in abalone Okay, no, but seriously if you live in rick rickivick, uh DM me so I can have some knowledge of if we actually have enough fans there so we can go Absolutely eat some of that fermented whale

No, no, thanks. Oh Well, we'll be we'll be doing the whole show nude in a hot spring. Yes. Oh, man, that would rule Oh, man, we just like are sitting in the hot spring and the audience is just like floating in front of us phenomenal Okay. Oh, this is a good one. Um, you're five days after that natural disaster and even more terrifying man-made disaster April 20th the deep water horizon oil smell Oh, yeah, last jolt oil world 11 missing potential blow to industry. I guess that's one way to put it I would say more like Permanent blow to the entire ecosystem of the gulf of mexico. It's the gulf coast. Yeah

Genuine night. Uh, and yeah, that that was a real fucking nightmare to watch because it just kept going Everyone's just standing around and there is Oh I got nothing. There's just nothing to do about it and like every day that thing was just Just coughing out Just tons of what if we shoot golf balls at it? Yeah, I remember I remember staring at a live stream That you could watch online of just oil Bursting into the gulf my fucking tummy ached any time I thought about it

Just that I just feel thinking like it's doing that right now And it was also way worse than BP said oh and over again They said, you know, uh, it's not so bad. It's not so bad And then it's like oh, there's like 10 times the amount of fucking oil being real and chemicals being released there Then you said and then they said, oh, we're doing the cleanup. No, it's all good It'll all be you know, spick and span and then uh, that also turned out to be a lie It definitely I mean the lives of all these fucking fishermen all these people who lived in the the the you know, mississippi delta I mean, yes, the government of louisiana continues to be just disgustingly

Supplicated to or to the fucking oil industry even after that. Um, no and like that was the thing I remember like at the time just feeling like it was so apocalyptic And yeah, it went on forever and now it's 10 years later And again, like people sort of forgotten about it. Like I guarantee you Like you said the effects of that are so much worse than like even the most like pessimistic predictions about it are well like fortunately the uh Ocean every all life in the ocean is dying anyway because of climate change So it really isn't like that affecting, you know, it was all it was all gonna end

as well bb did bb did a It really good job of burying stories about the disaster They enlisted, uh, you know, the local police to keep journalists away from their refineries and the cleanup areas things like I mean the silver lining to this, um, you know Yeah to this play Is of course we got to get a a a wonderful film starring mark wallberg. Yeah

Berg about the deep water horizon. Yes. Did you guys do that for this show? No, but I did watch it I haven't seen it. I haven't seen it. They played on tv a lot. Okay. Uh, okay, july 15th Dodd frank passes Law remakes u.s. Financial landscape will touch most americans bankers gird for fight over fine print Well, would you'd surprise that you guys know that in the air since Dodd frank has been passed. It has been gutted Uh filled with loopholes and interpreted in such a way to become basically meaningless another big win This is a criss-todd and barney frank. Yes. Remember when his nipples look disgusting Disgusting protruding from his shirt

And uh, criss-todd is going on to be the uh, leading lobbyist for the mpaa. Yes. Yeah, just another little lobbyist Another piggy hoglet. Whereas, you know, I think you know, barney frank's just on to what's going on to just, you know, look good Yeah, cool. Yeah. Um, okay august 2nd forward sells volvo buyer is china's Zhijiang geely holding group. Uh, don't remember that story at all. Well, congrats. I don't really have any thoughts about it Don't care at all. Right to china another big victory Yeah, well, I love that presidency. My first car was a volvo, uh, 1995

Volvo 850 turbo wagon one of the fastest production Station wagons of the mid 90s. I have never owned a car. They're just very they're very safe automobiles. Yeah, that thing was like A car. Well, yeah, yeah, my only the only my first and only car I've ever owned was a 2001 forward focused hatchback in the city or in college. No in college That's the only time I needed to have a car essentially Um, okay, December 12th a and p files for bankruptcy. Goodbye Bye losers company was the u.s.'s first national super market chain

If you got to go Bye. Bye honey So 2010, um, yeah They were really they were really destroyed by all the bad press from that uh, john updike story And of course, I can't believe it wasn't in there, but that was the tea party boom wave election That uh, just annihilated. Yeah, there was no. Yeah, there was nothing about that in this roundup It really did set the stage for the whole new republican strategy of Of victory through, you know, just a stalemate

Because that swept them into power not just in the congress, but also in a lot of state houses Just in the exact moment that the fucking census was coming in and they were just going to start redrawing congressional It was also really the first time that the republicans could be swept into office solely on the basis of Grass roots idiocy like moron shit that, you know, I know like the the tea party was seeded by you know, billionaire money But come on a lot of that stuff was real freelance, you know true believer nonsense All the death panel stuff and the and the birther stuff was you know That was a majority of the republican base

I mean like you can juice these groups with like a ton of dark money But look at like, you know turning point usa like I mean like They're fucking like their memes are only catching on like old people on facebook If they did like an event where people actually had to show up to it They could get what a like a few dozen fucking people or whatever whereas like the tea party shit I mean like yeah, like these fucking people were coming out in the tricorner hats with the teabags hanging off of it and all that shit like So, yeah, um, and they prefigured the And most of them became them and it worked it worked for them

Because like especially after 2008 when you know, everyone dumbly thought like the republicans as a party were like as dead as the wigs or whatever I remember you know, that yeah, I think They probably would have been had it allowing myself to believe that which they honestly probably would have been Had it not been for the reaction engendered by the financial crisis the election of obama but also obama's complete failure to You know, ameliorate the effects of the economic crisis on anyone other than goldman sacks No, yeah, as soon as they decided to protect the bankers Uh, and especially fuck over homeowners. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, because like people say a lot of the defenders of obama say

Uh, uh, what would you do? We had to do it. Yeah, but like there's no better example than the the actual foreclosure crisis where they just chose to back the fucking banks Instead of the people who held the fucking mortgage. Well, not just that I mean, I think I always think we did the general demobilization after obama because a lot of reactionaries did vote for obama Because they were fucking fed up and they were getting fucked and then within six months He told you with every fucking action and this and word Everything you were pissed about that happened under a bush. I will continue. There is no change It's a good thing though that we uh, solved uh, this reactionary turn and I believe that october with the rally to restore sanity

Oh, wow. Yeah, we were one of the real just dark moments Yeah, no, honestly, I remember they did that rally to restore sanity because like, you know, for me The steward daily showed during the the bush years and then early early obama, but also the colbert report Where you know, like, uh, I mean, I know it's like Cringe recording to say now, but I you know, I thought we're very good or very important to me at the time Yeah, like that. They were good shit. They were a light in the early odds. There was not much shit But uh, man when that rally to restore sanity happened like that that's when like there's something in my my heart and soul Kind of like took a turn to the I don't know the dark the left hand path

Let's be honest the the the golden path the path of truth and light I just can't and the the way that they couldn't make any actual proposals Or point out the actual sinister and awful agenda the GOP was pursuing so they had to entirely make it about how uh, How unreasonable they were being they were yelling too much Use your inside voice was a popular sign at this fucking thing. They were they were dressing up in silly costumes How it was just an expression of urban bohemian smugness The exact fuel for trumpian reaction and culture and the thing is that's important about it is it's totally unideological You're not there's no way to argue. Oh, you're just mad about them because they're liberal and they have like liberal views

No, it's just pure smug performance. Look at us. Oh, we're so very clever. We're so reasonable And I love the fact that they did that in response to the glint back snake handling psycho like jim jones fucking What was that called again? What was it called rally for America rally for America something like that? It was off the chain and then these fucking nerds show up and be like no, we're gonna show how reasonable Yeah, I guess we sort of this is exactly was more politically effective Yeah, because the election was like two weeks later and it's like oh shit the fucking republicans just stops the doors off All right, moving on to 2011

uh, january 14th the arab spring kicks off tunisian's house president us applaud's change of power Rare popular uprising is shocked to arab world. See this is the beginning the true beginning of the posting decade It's true That's what people started to finally realize the posts had power that there was a power and a post Well, what we really began with was the uh, what we in the west called the green revolution in iran That was oh, I remember that when everyone like that was the very early days of twitter where any of those all have been told Everyone to like yeah, I have a great avatars Yeah, that'd be a throwback if you found somebody who still had like the green shaded avatar

I'm sure there's some user on twitter who still does that there are still people with the fucking triple parentheses around their names I'm sure there are other people doing that harry anton does i'm thinking back to the arab spring though. I think like tunisia Is where it started and I think it's still the only country where it actually worked out Yeah, I mean it like egypt was like the biggest one and like those here square Scenes were incredible and they overthrew their president From morcy and the muslim brotherhood who was then outed by a military Then like this with the ironic thing is that many of the same people who were protesting to get rid of uh, Mubarak cheered on the military getting rid of morcy because they just they didn't want to sign up

Yeah, the muslim brotherhood. Yeah, uh, it's just it wasn't really it's a real good example of how like as encouraging as it is to see protests, you know in some countries obviously other countries. It's all the cia uh, but protesting but the very spring's a great example in some countries anyway of Uh, the lack of cohesion and the lack of like an actual goal making it very hard to Shape events. You know what I mean? I mean, you could say the same about our protest movement becoming absolutely Women's march well because one million people in washington d dc gathered together to say we want something And of course, let's not forget also i'm saying some of them

You got you got the uh the us in there shake stir the pot some places Putting in a little chili a little salt salt into the pepper. You know what I mean? Spice it up the william a is a little bit You know, January 20th Uh power shifts a top google internet giant says co-founder larry page will replace ceo eric schmidt. Oh, no Don't really have yeah or memories or thoughts of that one. Don't really care. Is that when they became alphabet? Is that later? I was later. Okay You get my january they should have they should have changed their name to four tax purposes

Because that's why they did it. Yes, january 31st. I think to know I think they did it for the same reason that You know how some local companies will be called like uh triple a auto repair a one So he goes there first so they're first in the phone book. Yeah, uh, what's first the alphabets? always january 31st I mean, I feel like I'm going to be like a little more of a little more of a serious strong man time for quote reform in a rare interview Bashar al-Assad said that protests in the region are ushering in a new era in the middle east And that Arab rulers would need to do more to accommodate their people's rising political and economic aspirations. That's that's just what a forward thinking leader

Yeah, and you know, I mean, I'm again. I'm glad it all worked out and everything and everything was fine after that talking about this topic. Exactly. What do you think? Actually, no, hang on, hang on. Let's like cut our mics and just have a long conversation about what we really believe about this topic. And then we'll turn our mics back on.

All right. Everyone put your mics down. Oh, hey, Felix is here. Oh, Felix is going to start talking about Syria. Hey, buddy. What do you got to say? Okay. Are we back in?

And we're back. Okay. Great. February 16th, border closings. No, borders. I thought, wait, no. Borders closing. No.

Other borders begins a new chapter 11. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Borders closing would be a little later in the decade. Very good. Okay. February 16th, computer thumps, Jeopardy Minds. God, these really don't seem like the stories that defined a decade.

I don't know. We're going to have to start. No, it was a bad decade. These suck. Well, it was a terrible decade. IBM to unveil a pack to develop commercial application. Wait, no. Sponsored content.

Yeah. March 11th. March 11th. Quake Tsunami Slam Japan. Oh, yes. Deftal and the hundreds. Oh, no. Government order was massive evacuation near damaged nuclear plants.

Yeah. See, the quake and tsunami were bad, but again, they're sort of leaving out the real necrosoft here, which is that it was the fucking nuclear meltdown. Yeah. That was really bad news. Pretty bad as well. Pretty, pretty bad. But what...

Oaks, that good? But then again, you got to think silver lining. it created a huge like, you know, zone in Japan where like everything's overgrown and like looks fucking, you know, apocalyptic and cool. Exactly. Yeah. You can set your films there. You can do all kinds of fun stuff. I doubt you really want to be hanging out in the zone.

Well, it's not for too long, but no, you just need a certain guide to take you through the zone, a stalker, if you will. And yeah, you can go there. It's basically a forest where all the trees are twisted and animes are real. Oh, okay. All right, this next one.

You guys won't remember this one. This is a big one. May 2nd, US forces kill Osama Bin Laden. Yes. Yes. They have captured and compromised to a permanent end, Osama Bin Laden. Heart, dedication, loyalty, the things I wear on my sleeve. I'm one of the men and forces of men and women of our...

Men and women of our forces, please. Remember? May 2nd, okay, so President Obama says September 11 attacks avenged and commando assault on Pakistani compound. Again, a hilarious story in retrospect where it's just like, we did it, everybody. And by we did it, like the Pakistani ISI

were just like, just coughed him up and like, like just in a trunk, they just opened it up, pop, pop, pop. And they still managed to lose a multi-billion-dollar secret helicopter. My only memory of this. And also violated the airspace of a sovereign nuclear power nuclear weapons arm. Did it hit it again?

Nah, they ran on it. Yeah, I'm sure they were. I mean, there's no reason they would have done it. They probably had to save face to pretend like... Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. They're gonna pay the public. But my only memory of that is, honestly, from the newsroom episode.

And the fact that they fucking thought, oh yeah, this was such a big, important story. They thought that it was basically like, if JFK got assassinated on the moon by Buzz Aldrin. That's how they thought the fucking killing of Pidlop. I don't remember where I was. Who killed the fucking shit? I remember where I was.

I was in my apartment in the East Village and was saying, and was telling my roommate, hey, the rock says that we killed Osama Pidlop. I only think I really remember from the real event was these fucking DC dipshits going to the White House. That was so fucking tri-hard. That was so tri-hard. I remember, no, I do remember news footage from...

Was there Pete there? Was he one of those guys doing the ironic, God bless the USA in front of the fucking White House? No, this would have been unironic. I genuinely wonder though, if, let's say, I don't know, McCain had won and the same thing went down and they killed Osama Milan, do you think it would have been a bigger deal?

Probably, yeah. Like the right wing would have celebrated. Like this... See, that's just it. They could not celebrate this. Well, see, that's it. Is it because the people who push cultural trends like self-consciously are the right?

Because they have this aggrieved block kind of, and when they get, and they feel always, they feel like they're being ignored by pop culture, so they really get behind something, right? Yeah, no, but obviously, I think the most memorable, I know, I remember local news footage from New York of like 10 or 12 guys just hanging off like lampposts,

going to USA number one, baby, we fucking got him. And it's just like, I could understand that kind of reaction if we poached his ass and let's say, I don't know, 2002. Yeah. You know what I mean? But like, at this point, it's just like, dude, he won.

He won. He got everything. He quacked Myers in two countries. Osama Bin Laden did 9-11 because he wanted to get America bogged down in the endless war in Afghanistan. Guess what? He fucking doubled down on that one.

He got us involved in two fucking unwinnable disasters. Fucking owed. You've been owed by Osama Bin Laden. And the other most iconic thing, of course, was the photo that accompanies it, which is of Obama and Clinton and all the generals in the situation room. Watching anime.

Yeah, watching anime. But for this one of this photo, you know what I'm talking about. I must credit our good friend, Brace. Unfortunately, his account is locked. So I wish I could have retweeted this, but he said the feed they were actually watching on this television was a GoPro of Ed Buck's live feed.

Oh. Ugh. Okay, May 19th. LinkedIn IPO price at high end. I guess it's the Wall Street Journal, so they cover kind of these stories that I don't find. Yeah, it's boring. All this stuff is what actually determines our lives,

but it's boring, so I don't want to hear about it. May 30th, Germany to forsake its nuclear reactors. Action follows nuclear prices in Japan. Yeah, honestly, bad idea. That was a bad idea. Because how many people actually died in Fukushima? I know a lot. Not that many, honestly.

Like four. Yeah, it was a very small number. Well, I mean, a lot of the people that they used for the cleanup, they'll die later. Well, maybe, but they're fine for now. No, I don't even think so. Honestly, it was a very limited event, and anti-nuclear people like to push the idea that,

oh, it released all this radiation. I think it did. Well, they really saw it, but I really think it did. Okay, but the way they talk about it is, oh, the whole Pacific is an exclusion zone now. Well, I mean, I don't know, I haven't been there. Virgil is under the opinion that people can have little irradiation.

Yeah, feel the little, it's all good, it's all fine. July 21st. Space Shuttle era comes to a close. Russia is poised to take leadership and manned space travel as final mission of NASA's 30-year program is completed. Boring. I am actually one of those people

that thinks it's incredibly cuck that we just stopped doing space stuff. Oh, it really is, but I mean, it's, but it's boring. Yeah, but the thing is, is that there's the stuff we can do, and there's the stuff that we wanna do that would be cool and exciting. And there's such a big gap between those things. Yeah.

That we're kind of left, like do we just keep doing the same bullshit that we're kind of sick of? Because we can't make over, we can't make the hump. We can't make the jump to like Mars or something. Mars, yeah, yeah. And so it's like, we're just gonna keep going to the moon, really.

Let's go hang out on the moon. Build a base there. Well, we should definitely build. No, I'm with you on that. I'm just saying the reality of it is boring. And because it is just like decades of like just miserable failure. My failure, I mean like budget cuts and shit like that

and the ending of the shuttle program, the fact that we've got to piggyback on private fucking rockets and Russian rockets just to get up there. Yes. No, at the very least America should have its own system for delivering men into space. In case we need to get them up there.

Oh yeah, absolutely. And also, look, I'm not trying to talk shit about the probes and like the pictures of Pluto and stuff, but I'm sorry, I'm not rooting for the robots. You get a person up there. Get a person up there. Could be a child. That's fine.

Just get a child up there. It's a lot easier, easier, you know. Needs less fuel to lift them off. Yeah. But yeah, well, so we can go to Mars. Like we do have the technology. It's theoretically possible. Yeah.

This would be a big old other thing. It would take a while. I mean, the thing like this. And you'd get bored. The hardest thing to do. Well, that's the hardest thing about it is getting like, how do you figure out how to get people on them,

how long it would take to get there and not completely go insane by this time. Gaming. Gaming and anime. Yeah. But here's the problem though. No multiplayer online shit. No, no, local.

Land. This is a land party. Yeah. On the trip to Mars. Yeah. Where it would take like two years or something. Something like that. Yeah.

Two or three years. Yeah. Think about how many levels you could buff up a wow character. Well, I guess you can't interact with the world of Warcraft. Here's the part that's stupid is, you know, you've got to be there for two years, right? You know, on the trip. And then, you know, you land on Mars.

And then what? You're spending like three days there and it's on. All right. On your way back, took some pictures, you know, took a selfie, left a plaque. Doodoo. All right. OK.

August 5th, credit downgrade for US government. S&P strips US of top rating shaking a cornerstone of the global financial system. We're OK. Yeah, whatever. Was that either one of the first government shutdowns? Yeah. It was because of the breaksmanship on the debt ceiling

when the Republicans were doing the suicide fucking. Yeah, they were. They were doing Martin Riggs shit to try to like rattle. Oh, by the way, speaking of Sorkin, Katherine and I just did an episode of Dave Anthony and Josh Olson's West Wing thing show. I've also been on that show. And one of the episodes we watched.

Now I'm pissed. One of the episodes we watched was it's like Toby, it's like a recess period. And they want to do a recess appointment of some federal judges. And Toby has like a meeting with like the aides or top chiefs of staff of like the Republicans who are going to oppose it.

And like, you know, he's arguing with them or whatever. And he's like, you know, I'll disarm my guns and you put down yours first. He's like, because it would never even come to a vote on the floor of the Senate. And then he goes, he's like, OK. He's like, if you want to shut down the government over some rinky thing, stuff like that,

you'll win us reelection without us even leaving the White House. So just go ahead, make my day. And I was just like, yeah, imagine other Republicans would ever get away with doing something like that, shutting down the US government and like, you know, taking our fucking economy to like the fucking edge of the cliff.

Yeah, they'd never try that shit. All I remember from that is a tea party of people like getting apoplectic about like the Obama. He disgraced our credit ratings. You don't know what that means. Was this we don't know what a triple A credit rating is? Shut the fuck up. Well, all those are the ones that are responsible for it.

What was it? This is one of the other. I forget which one of the government shutdowns it was. But I remember people getting super angry that like no one was cleaning up the fucking statues around the National Mall and shit. And it's like, you go there and fucking clean up litter ass all get that care about it so much.

Get that kid who is going door to door for flags to clean them up. October 5th, Steve Jobs dies in 56. Oh, you bet. Oh, I think we've said this before. The single greatest refutation of all new age medicine and organic holistic horseshit. Yeah.

If he couldn't fucking live, there's no way you will by doing this shit. He had access to more and better of whatever the hell you're looking for. I remember it's apple stores across the country. People were leaving flowers and shit. A little handwritten mess like thank God. That is some real peasant mindsets.

Oh, yeah. That is some real. Like after that, like, you know, you have no authority to like laugh at the Tea Party in Bissell. Well, actually, this is the next fucking story in the Wall Street Journal. This is interesting. Their view of the world.

October 12th, the iPhone finds its voice. Features in the 4S include a system that answers questions out loud and learns a user's speech. How is this a fucking story of the decade? Because we're all love our phones. Everyone, you know what you're reading that story on? Yeah, my iPhone. Here we go.

Now who has been owned? You. November 4th, rolling the dice on co-working. We work by property in Manhattan near the Haaland Tunnel. Oh, if this thing's only going to go up, up, up. Listen to one of our very recent episodes on this. November 20th, Syria attention grows. Cut.

Can we take another break for a second? We'll be back. We'll be back. OK, and we're back. December 15th, battle flag comes down in Baghdad. US closes its mission on an uncertain note. Troops depart as America leaves the world's largest diplomatic presence behind.

Tensions arise between Shiites and Sunnis. We left. It ended. We ended the war. Do you guys remember when the war ended in 2011? Remember that? Remember when Iraq was this scary place you couldn't go to? Yeah.

No, there were no. And then there were no troops there. There's no troops there anymore. You'll find. I'm sure. I'm sure there's no way there's still hundreds of troops there. December 17th, North Korean leader is dead. Oh, all right.

Kim Jong-il is passing, opens a new and potentially dangerous period of transition and instability. See you at the crossroads, crossroads, crossroads. We at the crossroads. Honestly, his son is fucking. He's doing a great job. People were worried about him. They didn't know if he had an enemy.

He was pretty young. He was kind of rotund and kind of like a weirdo. Unlike his dad. He had gout from just too much Swiss cheese. Apparently that's true, but you know what? He took it over to go over and he asserted himself and he's feeling himself and I'm here. Did you see that those photos of him riding that white horse?

Yes, he looks fucking great. He looks like a little pimp on it. Honestly, he got one over on his dad by meeting with a U.S. President. It's true and getting a U.S. President to go to North Korea and be his best friend and be their friends that they run around together handshake and do each other's hair.

Yes. Talk about boys. Okay. Moving on to 2012. The end of the wine calendar. Remember when everyone was just crossing their fucking fingers if that was real? So we could all end this.

January 11th. Hostess on the shelf. Twinkies maker files for Chapter 11 protection. Oh my God. Next, please. March 4th. Putin wins third term in disputed victory. A mid-middle class revolt.

Kremlin boss reclaims Russian presidency. King. Another king. He just can't be beaten, you know, and his checks always arrive on time. May 18th. Facebook's IPO sputters. Underwriters forced to prop up IPO of social network.

Only a 23 cent rise. Oh, oh, oh. Don't care. May 21st. I was actually asking Matt about the, I don't know if this is a worthy avenue of conversation, but I was asking Matt about this while we were in the U.K. Do you guys think that anything will ever be done about Facebook?

It depends on who's president. I don't know. Yeah. I think they could face a very hostile environment, but a lot would have to change. Yeah. I don't know. I kind of feel like nothing's going to change any of those structures.

How do you rearrange the Internet, you know? Yeah. It's such a foundation. I already gave you the solution. Make me a mod. Yeah. Just make me the mod of Facebook and Twitter and LinkedIn and whatever, and I'll sort it out.

I've offered this many, many times. You should be the lawnmower, man. It all exists inside your brain. I mean, I don't even really know what a cyber being who goes into Matt, speak into the microphone and fucking cut Matt, speak into the microphone and you cut the grass. Yeah. May 21st.

A new home for computer screens. The face wearable glasses show turn by turn driving directions or displaying email and text messages. Could be the future. No. Definitely not. Definitely not. The future.

Remember when there was a minute when they actually tried to fucking get people to wear those things? Glass holes. What about there? Just to see, will people just react by instantly stomping you? And the answer is yes. They will. I remember seeing all the stories from the early adopters, San Francisco guys,

posting up some teenagers. They saw my Google glass and they beat the shit out of me and they stomped on it and they called it nerd wear. What they realized is that that is not going to be a viable technology because they would have had to literally change everyone's perception of everything to accept wearing that without looking like a dork. So it has to be something that you could clip onto a pair of glasses that will not look like.

And it's also broadcasting to everyone, hey, I'm wearing a wire. Hey, I'm an ARC. May 25th. Space chase billionaires. Some of the terrestrial world's wealthiest men, including Elon Musk, are backing private spacecraft. It's still going strong. Yeah, it's still going strong.

It's doing good. We're looking for their escape hatch. Let's scut back. I said the other day on Twitter that I think every millennial who likes Pete Buttigieg should volunteer to be like guinea pigs for Elon Musk's privatized space program. Yes. And it'll be like, yeah, there was a teacher on the Challenger. Now it'll be the teacher's pets on the Challenger 2.0.

I mean, I just remember that as like the introduction of Elon Musk as a character in the like pop culture narrative. All right, that was the first season with Elon. Yeah. That was like Epic Space Man. Yeah. Space Man, I think, was first even before Tesla. Yeah.

And honestly, Salute, so much juice from that character, a really delightful addition in terms of the narrative. It's like, if you're like these Musk fans, do they know how he became rich? He's not like Hank Reardon. He didn't invent some sort of new mind blowing technology that like changed the game in the sector. He was just a fucking investor in fucking what PayPal? That's it.

He just got lucky. Like every one of those motherfuckers, it's just a guy whose number came up at the fucking a tech stock casino. I mean, he's not a genius. I will say this about Elon Musk, especially in light of his idea to revolutionize transport by having like individualized tunnels that take one car at a time under a city. Yes. Not only an idea, but also his new, the Tesla truck that looks like it's from Total Recall

or something. Yes. I like that because I feel like I like anything where I feel like the world I'm living in now is catching up to like the dystopian science fiction of my childhood and teenage years. But also like the Tesla truck and basically every one of the ideas his company has, it reminds me of like a glorious era like in Hollywood, where like culture was just determined by everyone being on cocaine all the time.

Yes. And that Tesla truck is like only the product of that. That is a cocaine truck. All right. All right. These are two quick ones. June 1st, new cancer drugs use bodies on defenses. All right.

October 28th. People still die cancer, so. Uber and Lyft face Bumpy Road. Who cares? Oh, this is a good one. October 29th, Sandy hits coast, floods New York. I remember this vividly. Oh, yes.

That was like the, that was one of the best natural disasters I've ever been, had a privilege to be up close and personal to. Um, work was canceled. Most importantly, I got an entire week off of work. Nice. So honestly, I hope more of this shit happened, not now because I've got, you know, good job. Here's another story around Sandy that might take too long, but I think it's funny. During the week of Sandy, everybody was really cooped up when the transit finally came back

online. Some friends of mine came over to our place and were like, we've been inside all week. Let's go out. We got to go do something. So we went out. And uh, some other people came up to us and we're like, Hey, you guys seem fine. We've also been stuck inside and started talking to us. And what we have found out from this couple is that they were, it came to New York to

cheat on their spouses with each other, got hurricaneed into the hotel and then realized that they hated spending time with each other. And so they were desperate to interact with other people other than the people that they were trapped cheating on each other. Were they desperate to go home and like recommit to their bonds of their matrimony? I mean, maybe not that much, but that, that was, that is what I said. That bizarre interaction was the thing that I associate most with Sandy. That's a sad story.

That's a bummer. It really was a big tragedy, Sandy. Yeah. That's like a, I originally thought it was good, but after you tell me that, no bomb box. Yeah. Yeah. No.

Um, I guess the main thing about Sandy is just a taste of things to come. Oh yeah. And of course, one thing I remember is, uh, Chris Christie hugging Obama. Yep. Oh yeah. Yep. That has hurt him. Oh, it did.

It really did. I didn't hurt him more than that. The fact that he was just a less cool version of Trump. So, but that also didn't help. And then right after Hurricane Sandy, Obama wins second term. Oh yeah. Thanks for that hug. Get it.

Thanks for that wonderful hug. And that big boy. More important, more important than Obama winning a second term, November 10th, China's new boss, party chief Xi Jinping has charisma, a common touch and a beloved pop star wife. Oh wait, I didn't know that about him. I didn't know that either. King Pimp. But can he reform a communist elite accustomed to the fruits of corruption?

Hell yes. He can. Yes. Yes. The East is red. December 14th, Sandy Hook shooting. Dozens killed in Connecticut. School shooting.

Probably best to not riff on that one. So that, so that was a thing. Uh, no, but it definitely changed our culture. And, uh, we finally took seriously, you know, guns. And, you know, remember when there were guns? Yeah. Man, we were so stupid. Do you know the cops carried them too?

Jesus. I do like that a lot of people's way of coping with the reality of the horror of the Sandy Hook shooting was to decide it actually didn't happen. And it would be a good use of their time to harass the family members of the dead kids. I mean, because they assume that their children never existed. Didn't Alex Jones just, he just lost that job. Yeah. Okay.

All right, online courses look for business model. Let's just skip all the business one. Okay. The Wall Street Journal sucks. March 13th, the new Pope. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Hey, Popey.

We got a new Pope here. Uh, best part about the new Pope is that the old Pope's still alive. Still hanging out. To this very day. Still hanging out. In a, uh, a circumstance that has literally never happened in the history of the Catholic Church. Very true.

2000 years. Popes just don't really resign. Yeah. Yeah. Why did he resign again? Did we hear anything about that? There's a lot of normal reasons for very normal reasons. And my favorite thing about that is all of these, uh, all these trad cat people, the

way they just compartmentalize that in their mind, they're like, yeah, it's fine. Yeah. No, because he's the savior. They like Benedict. They wish he was still Pope. But it's like, yeah, he fucking resigned because he was in the middle of a nexus of fucking sex and banking scandals at the heart of the fucking church. April 15th.

Oh. Deadly blasts. Rock Boston. The act of terror kills at least three, injures about 140 as bombs. Uh, Boston's 9 11, otherwise known as the real nine. God, I feel like we covered all of these through bad movies. Can Felix prove his whereabouts that day? Yeah.

The bearded. Who's wearing out April 19th, US probes, new Syria weapons allegation. Moving on. Uh, April 24th. Deadly collapse in Bangladesh. Oh. This is by magic.

This is wonderful. Look, different countries have different safety standards. And that's. Okay. Oh, this is a big story. June 9th. Edward Snowden contractor says he is source of NSA leak claims. Oh, was this sparked national debate about surveillance lawmakers urge extradition to

United States. Welcome to the cyber war. Well, yeah, that was, I mean, that's, that was one of the, I think huge stories of the last decade. Oh, absolutely, because it's when it inaugurated like the cyber discourse. Yeah. Like that's when we started off thinking about being cyber beings and how we have to battle in the digital mind space for each other.

I also like how we reckon with exactly zero of those revelations. Yes. Many of them were actually just formally approved by successive laws. They can turn your phone on whenever they want. Yeah. That's the thing that like even only, let me remember when enemy of the state came out. Everyone who was in that movie is still alive. I have a lot of respect for Snowden because Manning convicted, went to prison, now currently

being held in jail in contempt of court for refusing to testify for a grand jury, Assange, you know, right now in jail, fighting extradition to the U.S. Snowden, free man, hanging out with his girlfriend in Moscow. Well, I mean, as free or fun, as much fun and freedom as one can have in Russia. Yeah. No, you got, no, it's really fun there. There's a bunch of doggos on the subway. And wild doggos, you can say hi to.

There's always people who are willing to sell you a drug you've never heard of and they're actually kind of aggressive about it. Driving is always exciting. Yes. Yes. Okay. June 26. How is Snowden not died just statistically?

Oh, I mean, I guess the other thing you said about like how everyone's just like, we all know now it's a matter of public record, like we all understand what the NSA does that they just hoover up every single piece of data and store it in like a gigantic underground bunker in Utah. Yeah. Yeah. They can turn on your phone at any time. They can track you, turn on your fucking webcam or your laptop or phone camera at any

given moment. And, you know, people are disturbed by that as they should be. But I guess I've kind of made my peace with it because I'm just like, I really hope there is someone at the NSA who has to watch me jack off. It's like I'm camming for someone and it's like that little thrill that I have without like doing it, but in kind of a private way. Honestly. I just want to think that someone's watching.

Honestly, you should be compensated for that because that is a sexual labor. It's work. June 26, historic win for gay marriage, high court rulings, lifts federal ban on same-sex benefits, weddings in California. Oh, yes. I mean, that was a big kind of watershed movement, especially considering how much of the previous black aid, how much of the culture war and presidential elections were defined by the gay marriage issue.

It really is one of those things where you, the shift is so rapid that it's almost breathtaking to look at how different things are and how central that kind of shit was. And every democratic political presidential candidate said they were against gay marriage. Indeed they were. Including Obama. Obama said that personally, I don't think it's between a man and a woman, but they basically just said, I think it's a state issue or state should be allowed. I would say, how about a civil union?

Civil union. Yeah. It's a different word, but it's the same thing. And then of course they all had to decide that they were always in favor of it and always loved gay marriage as soon as public opinion changed. Yeah. August 5th, Jeff Bezos buys Washington Post. And everything was great ever since.

Democracy dies in darkness. August 6th, Islamists sees air base in Syria, moving on quickly from that one. August 8th, the heroin epidemic hits small towns. Use sorrows amid a shift away from costly prescription narcotics that are becoming tougher to acquire. This is another huge, huge story of the decade. Opioid crisis. The opioid crisis is really slow motion.

It's eating out the entire heart of the country. I mean, it's incredible because, yeah, like no, it was caused by pharmaceutical companies and like everyone knows about the Sacklers now, but the way they pushed things like Oxy Cotton in the previous decade and then realized what they were causing and like the government did and they cracked down on it and like those pills became incredibly expensive and incredibly hard to find. But there was just, you know, tens of thousands, hundreds of thousands of people who were, you know, addicted to opioids who just realized that shit, heroin is better and cheaper and

more available. And the Mexican cartels shifted a lot of their stuff from cocaine, which they realized, I mean, had made them multi, multi-billionaires like at the level of like Saudi Arabia. What they realized is that there's not really a growth market in cocaine because like they've sort of maxed out on the number of people who can afford it and use it. They're doing it. Whereas heroin, they pushed in a big way essentially to self-consciously undersell US pharmaceutical companies and they've done it in an incredible way and it kills probably a Vietnam level

of Americans every year. And I think it's crucial to remember that part of that brew that made it happen was the Sackler families and all these other awful pharmaceutical ghouls pushing these highly addictive pills. The other part was a lot of people go to the doctor for injuries that they sustained at work at their shitty fucking jobs where they can't take off, where they fucking have no real workman protections and where their bodies are just wearing down. Wearing down and you have to keep going to work.

And there's a fucking pill that will allow you to keep making money so you don't fucking starve and then you end up depending on it. Yeah. And all it takes is just like a small back pain a little bit at a time over and over and over again. It's these small, non-visible ailments that are, again, yeah, caused by so much of jobs that exist in this country, especially for people who are not have like, you know, like office desk jobs.

Yes, exactly. The people who basically have a professional job, the people who basically have zero impact on any of the discourse that any of us talk about on a given day, which means that we really have to recognize that we, every day we're fucking sifting through whatever people are talking about, it is always going to be a radically distorted segment of people who are in some sort of professional capacity in a country where that is absolutely not the norm. All right.

The next two stories, a boring business shit. February 14, February 13th, GM wants his recall, but who cares, February 23rd, Ukraine president driven from power, Yanukovych leaves capital and decries what he calls coup by bandits. The made-end movement. You can look into that one. There's definitely some shady shit, I think. This is just more names of people from the Ukraine.

This is like impeachment stuff. Honestly, I want to just dramatically seal off anything having to do with Russia or the Ukraine or any of those stupid countries. It's all boring. It's all dumb. It doesn't mean anything. Just let them up. There's like a hundred million people in Russia.

Russia can have a little Ukraine. They can have a little Ukraine. Whatever. Russia and Ukraine, you mean the bear and the made-on fare. Wow. Wow. Wow. Holy shit.

Oh my God. Have you been waiting on that since 2014? March 8th, Malaysia Airlines jet goes missing. Remember that one? One of the last big stories that actually lasted. You know what I mean? They still haven't found it. Right.

But what I mean is that even like the panic shooting, that was like a three-day story. The fucking airplane stayed the thing people talked about for like a fucking month. I don't know if it's anything that sustained interest that long since then. It wasn't that one. Because nobody could find the plane. It wasn't that the year the Super Bowl lights went out. Yes. That felt very late.

Late Rome. I remember that happen. Okay, this is like a half an hour, all the memes from that Super Bowl lights, Bronx, Zoo, Cobra, Bronx, Zoo, Cobra, Pharrell's hat, Ikea monkey, Ikea monkey a little bit before that. For some reason, Bloomberg speaking Spanish, El Blumbito, I believe that Twitter account is still posting Spanish Bloomberg memes. That's good.

That's normal. March 18th, Putin signs treaty to annex Crimea. Yeah. I should have blew my joke on that already. Moving on, August 11th, violent night in St. Louis suburb. Police fight tear gas in Ferguson, Missouri to disperse crowd near home of 18-year-old shooting victim. Again, this is another, I think, legitimately biggest story of the decade is Ferguson and

the launch of Black Lives Matter, the violent repression of those protests by the police. Here's another story that's come out of this that gets almost no coverage that, what is it? 17th. A dozen of the organizers of those original Ferguson protests have just been found with a bullet in their head, burned to death in a fucking car. Yeah. Or just like he's been murdered.

Murdered or or claimed suicide. A lot of people have been found burned in cars. A lot of just mysterious deaths that just are getting written off as, you know, gang violence or something or suicides. It's a very suspicious pattern, certainly. November 3rd, one world trade opens. New era begins. Sucking, fucking building forever to build that piece of shit and it fucking sucks.

It is one of the just as it looks like a fucking it looks like Optimus Prime's dick. It's just garbage. It's supposed to like the thing that's supposed to be interesting about it is it's like these two like pyramids that like connect or something. But it's boring. It's just it's boring. It's really boring. They really should have just rebuilt the Twin Tower.

Hey, Virgil, thank you as, you know, as as mist of fucking New York over here. I got to say, I always I always wanted and I hope for from like September 12th on that they would just immediately clean it up and then rebuild the Twin Towers exactly as they stood. And instead of those reflecting pools or the fucking 9-11 Museum, the memorial that they should have kept is that one piece of like the outside frame of the Twin Towers that was still standing after the towers had come down. You know I'm talking about.

Yeah. They should have shard on the side of one of the buildings. They should have kept that in the place that it was standing at the time as like the part of the original World Trade Center and then just built the fucking two buildings exactly as existed before, which I thought would be like the ultimate fuck you to the people who did it. And you know what? And by that, I mean, I think not exactly the same, but they should have added one floor

to both of them and said, all right, if you destroy him again, we're adding another floor. The towers just got another floor. You know, you want to play this game, but we did that. The United States did that. United States rebuilt it exactly the same in the alternate universe where we responded correctly to 9-11 by not doing anything. Yes. The country that did nothing smartly rebuilt them.

The idiot country that pursued forever war to prop up its fucking military economy is the one that created this disgusting death cult worshiping site where all every fucking hay scene comes to fucking pay like some sort of weird ritual like hodge to America's like martyred nationalism. What the fuck is it? It seems very dark. Well, this is, you know, this goes back to what we were saying about OBL's death and how, you know, you're calling them OBL now.

Yeah, OBL. That's the tactical term for it. The Tea Party types, the right wing hayseeds, you know, the Hoopleheads, like they didn't really care about it because, you know, of course, it was Obama's victory and you can't let Obungul get one. Exactly. But also, you know, at the end of the day, they did not really care about 3,000 New Yorkers dying.

Of course I did. Those are the people you guys hate. Yeah, you hate them every other day in the air. You hate them as much as Al-Qaeda because you guys are kind of American Al-Qaeda. Yes. Yeah, very similar social views. As Dinesh D'Souza wrote in an entire fucking book after 9-11 that Al-Qaeda is right about American culture and that's why we get attacked by terrorists.

I would just say that I narrowly avoided working in One World Trade. You were told to stay home that day. Interesting. I honestly, very literally was in that I was fired on the Friday before Mike, if any of you guys remember that company that I worked at before I worked at Chappell was moving to the 80th floor or something of One World Trade and just in very tech startup way, you know, they brought us all to the 80th floor and then on finished office space lubed us up with cheap box wine and then that motherfucker Chris Alchek gets up and like, our move here

will symbolize Mike's placement in the center of the global media landscape and I'm sitting there like, and here's Action Bronson to perform for you. Yeah, and I'm just sitting there like drinking my third like wine juice box being like, just tell us you're moving here because it's cheap. Just do me the honor of like telling it to my face. Everybody wants to work in the 80th floor of this fucking haunted skyscraper. Yeah, this is a total aside, but you know, one of my minor interests is drinking beverages that are fictional.

Yes. And have you ever actually had wine in a can? You can't drink a fictional beverage. Yeah, I've had a can wine, Underwood. That's a good brand. No, no, no, no. What do you mean by a fictional beverage? You can't drink a fictional beverage.

Okay, fine. Let me explain this for you guys. A beverage in a fictional TV show like a flaming mow or something like that and you make it in real life. It's a fictional thing on blood wine. Things like that. Butterbeer. Butterbeer.

And, but no, no, I mean, you get a box wine, you got a box wine, you drink a can of Coca Cola and then you fill that can empty can with boss money. Yeah. From Always Sunny, right? Yes. Yeah. What does this have to do with 911? Well, he mentioned box wine.

So, yeah. But you've never done that. No. I have done it. And it is actually really refreshing and delightful because you can still get a little bit of sugar from the coke. Coke and red wine is a thing in bass country. I like that.

I love a coke and a coke and red wine. And it really is. And also for the reasons that they mentioned on the show, you know, it's, it's, I don't know. It's nicer to hold a can than it is to hold a wine glass. It's more secure. Way more secure. You can just circulate easier.

Yeah. You know, it's not sloshing around in there. There's like a hat. There's like a lower center of gravity. It feels, yeah. More substantial. Aluminum cans. Great containers.

Yeah. So just a heads up. I've given up for aluminum cans. Yes. I've given up for a Robbie Virgil day. Maybe that should be a thing. Maybe everyone gets a big box of wine and, you know, 12 pack of Coke cans and drinks the Cokes.

And for the rest of the night, just, you know, fills, keep your can, put your name on it, fill your can up with box wine. November 24th, police officer not charged in black teens death, violence flares again in Ferguson after grand jury declines to indict Darren Wilson in shooting of Michael Brown. Yeah. And it's, I feel like, how many other stories exactly like this have not made the news of the decade because they just happened after and everyone's just like, I could think of a few cops who have actually been charged.

That's what I was going to ask. One of these shootings, but they're few and far between. And there are a couple of these cases are just so grotesque and insane that we're like, the guy is literally lying on the ground, he's based on the concrete and just got shot in the back. Yeah. Was that guy even charged? He was.

He was charged. They decided not to charge him. Oh, wonderful. And then he sued the, and then he sued them for PTSD for like six figures. The guy who had your fuck written on this fucking rifle will American law enforcement agent agents ever have anything coming close to consequence in their orbit? I got to say, though, that it's a real issue that people have to really start thinking about like, we've cultivated a death squad network in this country.

Yeah. The use of like a punisher iconography and this thin blue line, blue lives matter shit where like the police have become, again, due to the war on terror in Iraq and like all that shit, a lot of them have come home from that and just gotten jobs of the police or private security or things like that. But you just cops having inculcated in themselves this idea that they are warriors and not peace officers who are there to like serve, I mean, when people talk about the militarization of American policing, obviously you're talking about the equipment and the tactics, but we

are also talking about as a mindset of being a occupying force in a hostile alien environment. But that civilians are your enemies are your enemy and that you are above them by virtue of your service. And that means that you have no, you have no fucking sense of duty to these people. You are there to subjugate them, which means they like, yeah. Do you know that? Do you know that? They're going to be a problem.

It's something like 10, something like 10 times more pizza delivery men die every year than police officers on the job. No, it's one of the same jobs you can have. Cops are such pussies. Absolutely. And like right now, the latest cop travel is like there's so few cops die in this country that right now the big issue is that, oh, the Starbucks lady wouldn't put my name on the cup and say I was a good boy.

Oh, they, they didn't see me at the Starbucks and I said piggy on my, well, that was made up. I mean, that was bullshit. But like that's what they're wild up about. It's like, I'm sorry. I'm not buying your shit about it being a dangerous job. I really, I really, I really admired the courage of anyone who works in a place like Starbucks and some fucking cop comes in and you say, no, fuck off.

Like that takes such fucking balls. No, we don't think I could just kill you back to the, like the Sandy Hook thing and about like how that was like, you know, in a country already numb to mass shootings, that was like far and away, like the worst thing that anyone could ever imagine. And the idea that like that could happen and literally nothing could change just to sort of signal to everyone that like guns are, we're not going to deal with that problem. We've given up entirely. Problems are just things that exist.

And the people who poo poo gun control kind of like are not entirely wrong. I mean, like I'm in favor of any like sensible gun legislation or gun control or background checks. Literally anything that could be passed. I want it, I'm in favor of it. But if you're talking about this and like Darren Wilson and these fucking psycho cops, I think the real gun control legislation I would like to see passed is disarming the police.

I think like cops in this country should not have guns. We need to stop it until we figure it out. You've proven beyond any shadow of a doubt that you're not responsible to fucking video in fucking Miami where these guys are just riddling this truck. With bullets with it. And they know there's in the middle of the high way that was over a jewelry theft for like worth several hundred dollars. They know there's someone in the cab and they're hiding behind people's cars.

They're literally using humans, civilians and shields. They are using humans as bullet absorbers. It's the literal version of those pro IDF psycho cartoons that are like the IDF soldiers in front of the baby carriage shooting at the back and Hamas is behind the baby carers are true. Our cops are behind the fucking baby. Yes. Yes.

And then they do it. And then they release the fucking cops releases a statement saying no law enforcement officers were harmed. We just just shot the shit out of a bunch of people killed two innocent guys. Now we did talk about in the show, but yeah, the UPS shooting in fucking Miami and like that guy was like his first week on the fucking job. It's just like really fucking sad. It's so, so depressing and fucked up just these cops like it's like, oh yeah, it's

like that. And the UPS's response that we're like, we're sorry to the officer who sprained his ankle while they killed our employees. Yeah. And of course, what's so funny is that the cops justification for their attitude of being beyond any kind of censure or public fucking supervision is, well, yeah, but I am the thin blue line that protects you from the animals. I am the fucking wolf that protect or I'm the fucking sheepdog that protects you from

the wolves, you sheep. I could never. I could not have been lower. They have the exact same contempt for regular people as they do for fucking criminals and will fucking turn on them just as easily that they don't give a shit like those guys instinctively hiding behind the fucking cars, putting civilians between them and the gun and without a thought about it. And my last thing on this is like, you know, like gun buybacks or restrictions like if

I could fucking press a button that could make that happen, I fucking would. And unlike those were like, there's just so many guns in this country that like it's almost impossible. Like there are those like 10, 30 guns for every single human being in this country. Taking away the cops guns could be done that easily because they're already working for the fucking state. So they just turn in your guns, send it back, can't have him anymore. Yeah.

If you can't get it done with a fucking taser or a fucking night stick or just your fists, like you're too big of a pussy to be a fucking cop. The real process has to be arrested is that our response to spectacular violence is, okay, you know what? We need more violence in society. We need more militarization. We need to put cops in school. And I know like that is mostly the, you know, the right pushing that stuff, but they are

just such a potent force and people are frightened enough to basically just go along with it. And at the, the, the Marjory Stoneman Douglas shooting in Florida, uh, my part is there were two resource officers with guns. Yeah. They were cops in the school who ran away during the fucking shooting. Like when it's not a fucking 12 year old girl sassing back at you, you can fucking throw it desk at and Taze, uh, not so tough. Now, are you?

No. Yeah. I mean, I would say like, yeah, what we, the militarization and like the, the, the punisherization of American law enforcement is one of the scariest, uh, stories of the decade. Yeah. Young people aren't being acclimated to it. They're not that they see like having to, if you're a fucking elementary school, like live shooting drills and shit, going through fucking live shooting drills, going through

a fucking metal detector and fucking like cops in your fucking class. You know, it's like, you know, implicitly, this is not normal or good. No, but what's so terrifying about things like active shooting drills, like being in, you know, sort of inculcated into that from such an early age is that it's like, it's like, you know, the duck and cover in the cold war. It's like, it's not going to save your life. Yeah. Nothing.

It's just like, there's no fucking chance. It's a ritual indoctrination into like, um, uh, like acclimatizing you to accept surveillance, social control, fear, and like, and also subservience to law enforcement. Which has been the name of the game since 9 11. It's been total mask offs since 9 11. Yeah. No, 9 11 was the template. 9 11 is the foreign version and the domestic version is mass shootings before 9 11 before

9 11. And it's just to make, to remind us to fucking be subservient because we need to be protected from these horrible threats. Because all the analytic energy before 9 11 was pointing out systems of control that are opaque, that are not apparent to you. And after 9 11, it's, oh, I guess we don't really need that analysis anymore. It's right there. It's just a gun in your fucking face.

Okay. Give us a fun one. We'll let last year of just, okay, uh, US resource, cubitize an historic deal. Obama thought it's half century freezer. Again, that's one of the only good things he did with his presidency. Now. Completely reversed. No, it was a good thing.

The run deal was a run deal. And then. Also. Goodbye. Yeah. Voting, uh, uh, uh, voting to condemn the settlements while he was a lame duck. That was a good thing. Well, I mean, well, I mean, yeah, I mean, compared to everything.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So, uh, Cuba, I mean, hope to go there one day and take back my casinos, the menaker plan. Yeah. Okay, moving into 2015, uh, okay. That was a good year.

Yeah. June 26th, Supreme Court rules gay marriages in nationwide. Right. I guess that was the final real big. Yeah. Oberfeller. Yeah. Yeah.

Oberfeller. Five four decision justices say constitution guarantees marriage equality to gay and lesbian couples. Here's my question on this. What are the chances of the Supreme Court overturning that? Very low. Yeah. Yeah.

Almost impossible, right? Yeah. I think the thing now with like the culture war. Like, like gay people, like gay marriage, all that, like it's, it's over. It's basically been won. But I think the, the right wing has like self-consciously, they've realized that they've been defeated on that, but they're like, they, it's a strategic retreat and what the new front they're attacking is just trans people.

Well, I mean, well, I mean, abortion is definitely still there, but I mean, in terms of like, specifically like the gay, like culture war, like it's just about making people fear and hate trans people. Yeah. Entirely. Yeah. Like gender and trans trans people are like the real new front in that culture war. Yeah.

But gay marriage proper, like that is so embedded in like our social systems that it's just, it's not going away. Very hard to imagine. And as well. I mean, you can also think about even if the right wing really, really, really wanted to push, you know, repeal a burger fell, that would just be such a fucking shit show. And you'd be doing it at the behest of maybe 10 states that would like forbid gay marriage. And it's just, it's, it's, you can't have some states acknowledge some marriages and

then other states not acknowledge those marriages. It's not going to fucking work. October 15th, hot startup Theranos has struggled with his blood texting technology. It'll be fine. Don't figure it out. She's a genius. Look at the fucking turtleneck. It's so good.

Is anyone else mad that they couldn't figure it out? Because I mean, it seems like a godsend for me. Go to the doctor. No. Owies. I mean, I am very anti always like when they, you know, I remember they had the flu shot that was a nasal spray. And they realized, oh, this actually doesn't work.

Sorry. This is my favorite because a lot. I mean, obviously all of these are bullshit. It's one of the funniest stories of all these big overvalued tech companies are scams at their heart, but they're scams that you have to take a second to think about or something, you know. But like Theranos was promising to do something that is not physically possible that like the technology to do what she said it could do does not exist.

She was basically promising, give me enough money and I'll invent it. And then turns out, no, you didn't. Maybe it's impossible. But you did not find out how to do it. So you're fucked. Never say never. Never say die. December 12th, global agreement on climate change.

Accord for the first time, binds rich and poor governments into reducing greenhouse gas emissions. And that's the end of 2015 because I remember there being a few other kind of big stories in 2015. That's it. Donald Trump started running for president. Wasn't bought a club. Yeah.

I mean, I wasn't bought a club in 2015. I mean, I'm just I'm really interested with the selection of these walls. All right. Well, 2016. We're over the hill. Now. Okay. 2016.

We are now in a post chopper era. This is what we entered. The picture. Yeah. Enter the chapel. Enter the chapel. Oh man. This is this guy's third 2016.

I believe is the first episode. I believe I know that off the top. And the first big story is in June 13th. You guys ready for this one? Microsoft to acquire LinkedIn. Fuck off. Fuck off. Shut up.

Two stories about LinkedIn and who gives a shit about the fucking website that we really know when it's used. June 23rd. Britain votes to leave the EU with something that was in past, isn't it, man? Boy, that's a story that keeps on giving and giving. You read us about 20 Chekhov's guns, right? So excited to see how the next few years turn out. June 30th.

Who could forget this story? Tesla autopilot. Shut up. Draw a screw. Shut the fuck up. Shut up. Oh my God. Drawing scrutiny is one of the big stories, two decade of stories across the fucking

world. Oh my God. One of them is drawing scrutiny. Oh my God. Oh my God. July 11th. Are you guys ready for this? This world shaking event.

Oh, damn it. July 11th. Hunter Pokemon has led to painful discoveries. What? What are the? Oh, yeah. A mid chasing monsters, quote, explorers have hurt ankles, broken phones, but also found kinship.

Oh, that's good. This is literally one of the biggest stories of the decade is the people who like walked into a glass door playing Pokemon go trash. Okay. July 25th. DNC hack prompts allegations of Russian involvement. Again, a story that just keeps on giving. Love it.

Keeps going and going and going. It prompted a few other things than that. You know, it wasn't just the providence of it, but the actual contents of the fucking hack that we're interested in. It is funny that it's like the decade kind of falls neatly in half, right? Where it's like pre 2015 things are check offs guns as you said. Yeah. And like everything from the deep water horizon to Sandy to the shootings and the cop stuff

where it's just like things happen and then nothing changed and it's it passed and we're like, it seems bad. And then post 25th, you know, in your back of your mind, you're like, hmm, seems bad. And then post 2015, it's stuff that we're still literally dealing with directly right now. Like the DNC hack is like all that shit is in the impeachment hearings on right now. Everything like this is to Felix's thesis. It's like, yeah, like all the checkoffs guns are all firing, but they keep firing, but

the bullet never hits anything. Yeah. It's just like matrix bullet time. It's just like going around and it's like, it keeps getting worse and worse and worse, but there's no resolution to anything. Because the system is broken down, the system cannot resolve real conflicts anymore. Boring, awful stories like the Russian DNC hack or Brexit, it just, they don't, they're just still with us.

All right. Okay. We're getting close. These next stories, just all fucking business. Wait, wait, wait, wait. What else happened? What's going on with LinkedIn's stock price in 20 LinkedIn stock buyback at 1372 a share at October of 2016, September 28th, big beer merger, Sab Miller, AB, InBev shareholders approved 100.

Oh, Jesus Christ. Yeah. That was a big moment for me. From home, my hometown brewery got bought by some fucking South Africans or something. Yeah. Now like all, all beer, like 90% of beer in the world is one of two companies. 90% of the beer in the world has diplomatic community in South Africa company and a Belgian company and they control all of the macros.

Those are, those are two good countries and they're probably going to eventually merge together. All right. November 8th, 2016. And remember what happened then? A really good show. There's a really good live show on a Guwanis ideas festival. Yeah.

We were on fire. Costumes were very good. The costumes were good. This was a year before I started producing, but I was at that show with watching. I mean, that was a hell of an experience. This was certainly an apocle moment for Chapo the show. This is, Virgil was on stage with us, but this is before you officially had joined the show.

Right. And you joined, shortly thereafter, joined the Chapo IPO. Yeah. And he, he was our election donkey during the show and he was looking at the polls and he had us a little election stick that he, Yeah. You were to our Steve Kornackie and we would throw to him over the course of show and half way through the show, we're like, what's going on?

And he goes, uh, Trump is just one Ohio and Florida and everyone just went like, just the fucking room. Just like, it's like someone dropped a fucking Daisy cutter and the oxygen got sucked out of everyone's lungs. Yeah. And then we were like, well, we got a half a show left to do. So let's fucking buckle the fuck down. You guys, I think we handled it very well.

You guys performed admirably. I have to say, given, uh, almost insurmountable, uh, challenges, uh, I was entertained throughout. Yes. We were gracious in victory. Yes. Donald Trump elected president. I kind of got, things get a little fuzzy for me that night, but apparently, uh, I ended up in a bar later, uh, and that, uh, when they were showing the, uh, the,

the, and when they brought out John Podesta to, uh, come instead of Hillary, I was apparently just started screaming at the TV, calling him a cum eating freak, which now is actually in retrospect, probably way too light a thing to call him pizza game is real. She didn't even talk to him at the chat. Oh God. Yeah. What a fridge. We've talked about this before, but man, that election night, gutless mood, sending

out Podesta to address, not even sending out Tim K in 2004, uh, when, you know, Kerry was widely lost, uh, they like three AM sent out John Edwards to say, it's not over. We'll talk about it in the morning. And then the morning they said, oh yeah, we lost because they were afraid like they're going to steal it again. I kind of did probably. I was, I was at the margin was so big. I don't really think this is another November eight story, um, some good news from that,

uh, from that year, marijuana gains at the polls. Legalize it. Voters approve recreational marijuana in four states, medical marijuana in three of the last day of the union to legalize, uh, marijuana. I mean, again, like that's one of those things where I would say, uh, things are getting better and by getting better, I certainly don't mean like, um, meaningfully redressing the horrendous atrocities of the drug war. But I mean, getting better in terms of like how good weed is and how easy it is to get

and like just the variety and shit like that. When I think back to how fucking hard it was to smoke weed when I was in high school and how fucking trash the weed we were getting, if we were lucky to was the delivery methods. Yeah. I've got my, how long you had to wait for it or had to get to talk to some weird guy or fucking like for every like shitty fucking clogged tarry bowl that I was packed in college. Now I have this little packs of vaporizer. Technology's wonderful.

Yeah. Yeah. So, you know, I, uh, lately, you know, I've been following a lot of the K high type, you know, lunatics and you know, they, they have been spiraling out of control since she dropped out the Ronan. Uh, just, you know, it doesn't matter who this is, the country side just doesn't matter to this. It's just going to read this one to you.

Bernie's plan to rig 2020 was one, evict the black women running the DNC to destroy the power of black super delegates, three, rig the debates to exclude candidates from poorer communities. How did he do that? What? Four. What candidates? No candidates are from poor communities.

Cory Booker, maybe. They're rich. Uh, encourage caucuses where only rich white people have the time to attend. Well, caucuses are bad. That's true. I'd encourage them. I mean, no, no, they, no, we, his people cut a deal saying, all right, we won't do caucuses. You cut out the super delegates, but racist to cut out the super delegates.

So both ends of it are racist. Oh yeah. Uh, you know, rig the debates to cut out candidates from poor communities, like, you know, Mike Bloomberg, a lot of communities in New York and he's from New York. Well, as long as you're talking about that, I want to talk about my favorite, uh, Kay Hive post of the day. I'm sure you guys saw this. This is from, uh, Kay Hive, Queen B. If Bernie was president, imagine his cabinet.

Sank Nina Turner, Cornel West, Bre Bre, Sarota, Chappos, trap house is the correct Jane, Jane and the squad. This is my favorite part. They'll troll Dems on Twitter, use power. Oh yeah. Warren as his VP, absolutely nothing we'll get, get done and will be stuck with the blame. We'll use our power and not get anything done.

That doesn't make sense. I also just like they'll troll Dems on Twitter and that's the worst thing that they can imagine. So we're with the power of the presidency, the plug, the ability to launch nukes. What's the worst thing you could do? Troll libs on Twitter is tweeting, is tweeting at somebody from like the at labor secretary, uh, Twitter handle. This sucks dude.

I think what she's admitting there is that the reason she hates them, the real, like the nightmare scenario is just getting, uh, them gloating at you and saying you're owned. And like some of those are like, uh, you know, reasonable. Like I assume if he becomes president, you know, we're all getting a job. Me and Nina Turner, well, it should certainly have some part in his administration and meet us. All of us. Okay.

All right. Here's the question though. Here's the question. What do you want? What do you want? Admiral. Admiral. Yeah.

Top Admiral. Top guy. You're the new Cestak. Yeah. I get to go on all the ships at all times. So secretary of the Navy. No. Just Admiral.

Admiral of the Navy. Admiral of the Navy. Well, you can't really appoint you to Admiral, but he can't. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. He can't appoint you to Admiral. He can't appoint you a secretary of the Navy.

Yes, he can. He can appoint me Admiral. It's not, no, he's the commander in chief. You don't have to confirm an Admiral. He points me Admiral. I'm Admiral. Can you appoint somebody a post officer? Yeah.

Oh, he can't. Yeah, he can. You have to fucking apply for the job. See, you're wrong. He's got, he's got the sword and he just, you know, puts the sword in your shoulders and your post, your postman, you're an Admiral, whatever, commander in chief, uh, Virgil Admiral of the Navy. Thank you.

My joke answer, uh, postmaster general, just cause it seems like a funny title to have. Uh, it is real, real uniform to real answer, uh, commissioner of the SEC, uh, clean up the media, just all around mod of TV, FCC, FCC, okay, they said, uh, SEC, FCC, I get to be a federal communications commission. I get to be in charge of all media. I say I'm the king of all media, that's exactly what I want to be. I got all the boats. I could also make the sailors do dance numbers, you know, song and dance numbers.

You know, it'll be wonderful because maybe you don't have a job, nothing to do, no sea battles. Just hanging out with your butts on a boat doing song and dance numbers, just having share perform for you. Yeah. Just awesome. Having a good, having a good ass time. Matt, what are you asking for?

Running the sun. Uh, I'll be press secretary. Ooh. I'd like to abuse those. You'd like to see. Yeah. Nice. Just show everything.

Just scream at them. They're pigs, just go, just every little disgusting hoglet. Just every day of fucking press conference with you, go screaming, shut up. Yeah. Shut up. Shut up. Just abuse them mercilessly because now we know definitively they will take it. Uh, uh, Mr. Crispin, Jonathan Carl, ABC News, shut up, shut the fuck up, shut the fuck

up. That'd be great. Well, how about you, Will? Uh, we could get them on that. You remember how fucking, how quickly everyone in the press corps came to the defense of that fucking Sarah Huckabee Sanders when Michelle Wolfe just made fun of her eye makeup? Oh God. I'll pretend that that was so beyond the pale when it's like, first of all, a, she looks

like a fuck. She looks fucking awful. She was. I mean, come on. Go. She looks, she looks. Yeah. Unfortunately.

Bye bye, honey. Yeah. She's unfortunately looking. Uh, and two, it's like you all know that she lies to you every fucking day. Why are you still doing this job? It's a bad human view report under oath that she lied. She told Mueller is like, yeah, I lied about that in front of the press corps. She's a criminal and not in a cool way.

No. Uh, she's a fucking Trump loyalist and defense all the evil fucking Monday. She will be the next governor of Arkansas. Yeah. And she's from one of the most fucking evil families in the country. Absolutely. Dogs burning psychopaths. Um, the answer, my, my answer to this question are posted by today from President Bernie.

I'm asking for ambassador to Ireland. Oh, wonderful. Yeah. Ambassador to Ireland, both because I've, I've loved all the times I've spent in Ireland, but mainly because there's just a few things I'd like to get done. I think I could lend my power and authority to an application. I'll take a destroyer and visit you sometime. That'll be fun.

Yeah. I could have a few uses too in the harbors there. Delphas is a big port. Oh, what about, uh, Amber and Felix? Amber, I'm sure I think she would be Secretary of Labor. I think that's what you want to be a good guy. Sure. And Felix would, of course, be the chairman of the president's physical fitness council.

Like Schwarzenegger. Like, yeah, exactly. Yeah. No, like Trump made a space force, uh, Bernie will make a gaming force, oh, no, owing to the fact that, you know, we live in the cyber age. We need a, we need a new cyber command and we need to, like, cyber is the battlefield of the future and who better to fight in the battlefield of cyber than Felix. Lieutenant.

Lieutenant. Felix country. Felix, we should be in charge of the cyber war. He's important. Yeah. He's the commander of our gaming forces. Yeah. I just hope ISIS doesn't have any, uh, eight year olds or better, mouses or whatever the

superior peripherals. Oh, actually, the ping in Damascus is really fucking good. Okay. 2017, we are rapidly approaching the present. June 1st, Trump withdraws from climate, all the news stories are now being contradicted. Nevermind. That big important thing isn't big or important. Well, August 21st, millions in U S looks skyward during solar eclipse.

I remember that. Including Donald Trump. It's directly staring straight at it. God damn son. Okay. This is funny. I remember, uh, I remember, this is actually, I do remember I was, this is when I was living in my old place on Quincy street and I went to the, uh, uh, the park, uh, down the street

and there was all these people there. They had like all the, like the glasses and the boxes so you could look at it. It was like genuinely like really cool because like it does this thing where like every shadow looks like a little crescent moon. It's very surreal. And I'm like, everyone's out there like having a good time. Like this group of like stoned teenagers just sort of ambled through the park, wondering what was going on.

And like these people were explaining it to them and they're like, just looked up. They're like, no, no, no, no, don't look at it with your eyes. You have to look at it through this. And they gave one of them like the, the glasses to look at it at the eclipse. And then he just looks up and he goes, oh, shit, that's wavy as fuck, bro. I will admit that I just looked at it. Yeah, I just looked at it. I'm fine.

I'm fine. I'm fine. Oh, some fucking nerds. They don't look at it. Well, yeah, fuck off. I looked at it. I'm fine. If somebody, if that fucked you up, I would have heard about it.

Like I would, there would be guys walking around who were like, I'm blind. Don't look at it. Yeah, there would be people walking around the casualties of the fucking eclipse. Yeah. It's fine. It's normal. August 25th, Hurricane Harvey slams into Texas, flooded the entire city of Houston, which is great because Houston is like house very, very like at sea level and it's an entire

just, it's like a concrete bowl. There's no drainage. Well, it's really fucked up because of course Houston, Houston has no huge shut the fuck up. Shut the fuck up. They have no. So we perform in Texas in 2000 and 60 are going to be very mad at you for, for this. Oh, they'll, they'll have their, they'll be, you know, firing their six shooters at the

ground and hovering slightly up from there. Okay. They have no zoning laws. You'll just have like a factory next to a house and all that fucking shit, which also means like there used to be these fucking wetlands there that would naturally absorb the water when so that would prevent flooding and no, now it's a, it's just a, it's just a long string of mission barbecues. It's good to know.

It's good to know that like, you know, these processes are working because they're, they're creating sustainable plans that can survive in the long term. It's good to know. Don't worry. All the way. It's been thought of. But don't worry. Barbara Bush took in all the refugees from Hurricane Harvey.

Personally. Who can forget on September 7th of 2016, 2017, when Equifax reported a huge data, shut the fuck up. Everyone got their $5 check. That actually wasn't, that actually wasn't really big thing. September 18th. Toys R Us is forced into bankruptcy. Remember that one?

They took Jeffrey, the giraffe up back and just fucking spoon in the tent. Another mafia bust out courtesy of fucking. Capital. Disgusting. Parasitic. Fucking. Hey, Deval Patrick. I know you didn't do any of the Mitt Romney stuff.

Did you have any, anything to do with killing Jeffrey, the giraffe, robbing a generation of children of their dreams of having toys, ripping off of the entire pension fund? When people tried to solve that, he just went, damn, science is too tight. Game recognized game. It's that, that that industry exists is breathtaking. How that is legal. It's like, yeah, no, we buy the company. Toys R Us was a good company.

We buy it. It's not a good company. I fuck. Hey, hey, children and their stupid toys. But what I meant is it was a problem because they have toys for adults also. So you know, I mean, of course, none of us like the fucking mulling crotch spawn in the fucking aisles, but getting all the all getting all the fucking, you know, box sets, you know, sticky with their fucking chocolate thing, appreciate the Lego Star Wars, the way you

and I do, Virgil, but private equity is the legalized mafia bust out that there's no way you can justify it. It's like, you destroy a perfectly good company, cost everyone their jobs, destroy capital so that these assholes could just pay themselves the money that they borrowed against the name of the company that they just allowed to go to hell. That's the best fucking part of it. You borrow the money using the company you're going to buy is collateral. Why can't we just do that?

Yeah. Yeah. I want to buy IBM. I don't have any money, but once I own IBM, then I will have IBM. Obviously. I mean, it's easy. What? So, you know, you know, 50 billion dollars.

Yeah. Yeah. Oh, bad. That's not illegal. September 20th. September 20th. I'm beginning to see a pattern here with this story is September 20th, Hurricane Maria hits Puerto Rico.

Oh, yeah. That giant, unprecedented hurricane. It was powerful to make landfall and island since 1928. Yeah. Um, the amazing thing about Hurricane, the Hurricane Maria story is it was like exponentially worse than Hurricane Sandy and Hurricane Katrina in terms of like the damage and lives loss. It was a story for like a couple of days in America. People forgot about it entirely.

And Trump's response to it made Bush's response to Katrina look like competent management of the disaster. Honestly, it really does tell you, like... It's terrifying. I don't know if it's just, if it's just... People just don't care because they don't know, they don't know that Puerto Rico is particularly part of America. I think honestly, that's a big part of it.

I think they, I'm not like, I think most people don't even, they think it's like, why do you give a shit about us having Puerto Rico in some foreign countries? Like, no, it's American territory. I don't think they know that. So I think that's one big difference between it and Katrina. Well, also, yeah, well, because every other week, there's a new story about some dumb dumb who's like, I saw a Puerto Rican ID and I wouldn't let them fly on a plane or something like that.

I mean, aside from the horrific, you know, death toll and just destruction of infrastructure and like, just the damage that it brought to that country and then also like that almost nothing has been done to rebuild or, and also that Puerto Rico as a country has been run as like a laboratory for austerity and Tea Party economics for the last probably 10, 20 years. I think in hyper, they've just been hit with a fucking booster after the fucking hurricane. Yeah. Yeah.

No, yeah. For all of that. Yeah. For the half of the schools in the country. Naomi Klein, Shock Doctrine, 101 shit. Yeah. But I would say here, like, you know, just as an addendum to this, any fucking Democratic president, if they get in in 2020, one of the first things they have got to do is statehood

for Puerto Rico and DC immediately if they take seriously any of this shit that they want to do, even the modest public option bullshit, they've got to do that. That immediately. Yeah. Day one. Day one. I mean, I don't know. I mean, obviously there's a lot of people in Puerto Rico who would prefer independence,

but I don't know. I mean, if you look at, you know, you know where you are being neglected by the United States, you know, you, I don't know if you'd be any better off if it was cut free, it might be better if it was brought in on an equal footing. Well, even if there was Puerto Rican independence, what's happening with all that fucking debt? Like, are you just keep that thing? Like independence movements in the world now, like Scots and whoever the fuck. I just look at them like, you know, you're all going to owe money to the same people

at the end of this. Like, where's the actual independence, at least the sovereignty, at least if you're a state, you can't go bankrupt. Yeah. I'm sure there are good arguments for and against Puerto Rican independence that, you know, I don't have the knowledge or wherewithal to discuss, but DC statehood at the very fucking least. That's such a fucking no brainer.

Also, we should just combine some states. The Dakotas, North and South Dakota, obviously just one Dakota, Delaware, New Jersey, that they fucking was the only reason those are two different states in the first place is because they would. They were both Republican states and Republicans control the Senate when they were carving them up and they said, well, shit, let's get four senators out of it instead of two. Yes. All.

Yeah. The Dakotas put stitching back together. Why only back to territory, Wyoming back to territory, or I was going to say, like Idaho, Wyoming, Montana, just combine it. We'll keep an even number of states. We'll keep that nice round 50 by making some states into several states. California probably should be above five states. Yeah.

More on the story. Let's shake up the state. Yeah. It's been too long. We have 50 years and no new states. Also, let's shake up our flag. Yeah. Let's get a new flag going in this country.

It does suck. It's not even symmetrical. Let's get a cool flag. How about like a marijuana leaf? Yes. Yes. It's a very interesting flag where instead of stars, it was different corporate logos. Oh, wow.

I think that would make a statement. Oh, wow. Dude. I think you might have been culture jammed. Did you know that? I discovered this about a week ago. Adbusters still exist. That's still a magazine you could subscribe to.

Can we get a company subscription to it? Let's do it. I don't know. I might be tempted to steal too many ideas, too many mind blowing ideas from their fucking magazine. I don't know. I don't know. The Foldins have gotten less and less funny over here.

October 1st, Las Vegas shooting, at least 59 are dead, more than 520 injured as police struggle to determine suspects motive. Now, I know certainly we've got a lot of material out of this one, but with the last on here, police struggle to determine suspects motive remains to this day one of the most baffling and terrifying stories. Yeah. I would say nobody to my knowledge has any idea of what, why he did that, which is why I'll be like, there's some weird, a lot of weird conspiracies about it was an arms deal

or something like that. Yeah. Sorry, Arabia. Sorry. You know, I could almost credit them or like, I don't, because I just, everything about it, like from like the pro of every other mass shooting, it was the most deadly by far and the least explicable in terms of the person or like motivations for doing it. Absolutely baffling.

So I claims that he had some sort of program on his computer, something that like destroyed his hard drive and like, they could be full of shit or that could be true either way. It means they're signaling to us that this is just nothing we're, something we're never going to know. We're never going to know. I, this rich ass real estate guy who could get sushi comped wherever he wanted, which just decided, I'm going to post up and kill as many people as I possibly shot 600 people. The thing is, according to like the searches that they did release, he was just like Googling

like where are large concerts like in the Western United States? Where can I go that's going to have the largest number of people that I could like potentially shoot at? That was his only fucking criteria and also just gone out of, out of the media in five days. And I, and like another perfect example, like we talk about how after nothing happened after Sandy Hook in this case, because he was using something that nobody heard of before, a bump stock, that created the perfect like compromise moment of, okay, because there's

no way we can actually get any big gun control legislation through, even though Trump decide, whatever there's a big shooting, Trump just goes to his instincts of being like, actually I'm a New York Lib is like, yeah, let's control the guns. And then of course the Republicans freak out and they forgets about it. But there's that one moment where he's like, yeah, let's do it. Let's band the guns. So in that moment, the thing that looked like it might happen was, we'll get rid of the bump stocks, at least, that allow you to make a semi automatic gun fire with the speed of

almost an automatic weapon. And yeah, never have reading these stories. Other than the boring like business one, like, you know, Facebook, IPO, Snowballs, it's funny going through this fucking decade. You begin to hear like it's sort of like a song we keep coming back to certain choruses, which are mass murders in America caused by guns, increasing hurricane and climate natural disasters, climate degradation, like just insane, billion dollar boondoggles from like the heights of American finance and technology, like just a bunch of successive scams and bubbles

and fucking rig bullshit. And I wonder what the new decade will bring again and again, that wedding after wedding after wedding. The thing I was talking about earlier is like listening through this song cycle of disasters. It's very much the thing that we say all the time is that everything stays the same. It just gets worse. Yeah. And it's like the first half of the decade almost neatly rhymes with the second half in

which it's like all the setups and then all the punch lines, you know. All right. October 5th. Harvey Weinstein takes leave from studio. I mean, that's one way to put the story. He takes a leave from the wine to see his, his Ghiblet I take on the new release schedule. Wonderful movies that we all love. Harvey Weinstein takes a vacation.

Movies on hiatus. No more Oscar gold for Weinstein Bros. Yeah. More. Yeah. Move follows media report detailing several instances of sex harassment by producer Weinstein says he will deal with the issue head on. And he did.

He did. Again, yeah. This I think, you know, like again, me too rhymes, you know, like Black Lives Matter is like this major kind of like a kind of like social movement very much driven by online and the media that, you know, attempts to attempt to confront a genuinely terrifying and intractable problem that is here to foreign American history has obviously been ignored entirely. You know, this is related to that.

It's a recent tweet by Lisa Blume who was Harvey Weinstein's big attorney, not just no, not not even his attorney, his consultant, like, like Michael Clayton. Yeah. Yeah. Well, his fixer, Ray Donovan, wrote up a bunch of memos proposals for how we're going to smear his victims. This was a tweet from her from yesterday, Elizabeth Warren is my top choice. But Pete Buttigieg is right.

We don't need purity tests. Who cares if he had a fundraiser in a wine cave? Our country is currently run by a whining cave man. Take any legal money you can raise and beat him in November. Remember when Harvey Weinstein before this story happened in 2016 went on MSNBC to accuse Bernie Sanders of being sexist? Yep. That happened.

You remember just recently found out that Hillary Clinton's PR people were working hand in glove with her and Harvey Weinstein to push back against these very accusations that he said he was going to meet head on? Well, I mean, that's that's absurd. That would almost, I mean, if that were true, that means like say during the nineties when her husband was facing accusations of sexual harassment and assault that she did some role in coordinating resistance and undermining the stories of the victims. Oh, anyway, well, you know, just to remind you, this is from Lisa Blooms of Wikipedia

page. Bloom, according to emails purportedly obtained by the Times, had proposed promulgating photos of several of the accusers and very friendly poses with Harvey after his alleged misconduct. Oh, Daily Beastly reported that Bloom had offered journalists Ronan Farrow opposition research on one of Weinstein's accusers, Rose McGowan, during his report that he got from Black Cube. That's literally the shit that those Mossad fucking Spooks got for him. Black.

Black Cube is the name of the Mossad front PI firm that they hired. Yeah. We're the evil. We're the evil company. Yeah. What I love. What I love the most about the wine cave thing is everyone defending it. It's, it's as awful as that person.

Yes. Like every single person defending is either in the bio, you know, I work for Pete Buttigieg or I am another fucking McKinsey, I or white shoe attorney. The fact that in the ostensible working class party in America, there's anybody, let alone top figures among elected officials and in the media to step forward after that debate in defense of wine caves is a massive indictment of the entire fucking party. I mean, it's just emblematic of its awful drift over the years. It's emblematic of, it's emblematic of their fucking arrogance because anyone with a lick

of sense hears that and goes, would try to downplay it. You know, it's like, well, well, well, you know, okay, wine caves, you know, that's, that's not a thing I'm concerned about. I'm concerned about training opportunities for people instead. Fuck faces like Gavin Newsom say, Oh my God, I've been in a wine cave for about 40% of my life. I've been in a wine cave for 40% of my entire waking life in a wine cave jobs for American citizens.

I own multiple wine caves. Whom amongst them? And Gavin Newsom said, and I mean, doubly awful because he tied it to the fucking wildfires which have destroyed a lot of California's wine wineries or whatever where he's like, we're hurting right now and attacking these wine caves. Jesus Christ. Or no, the other, the other great thing, Clara Jeffrey, where she's like, look, a wine cave is just a wine cellar and we all have one of those, it's just a basement where you keep

your wine. This is like the problem is that it's a bunch of fucking blood drinking billionaires getting together. The fucking cave is incidental, but the fact that it triggers them and they feel the need to defend the concept, you're so just soaking in bourgeois fucking self-satisfaction. Talk about fucking telling on yourself here. Yes. I don't know what a wine cave is.

I've never been to a fucking wine cave. It's not a cultural thing, but just your freaks because anybody with a liquor sense understands that wine cave is just a nice slick, a cynic's note for the broader problem of billionaire influence on politicians. Like that's what it means. But if you are so in that like town and country milieu of peace people, your instinctive love of like Sonoma fucking wine country is such that you are drawn to your feet to defend the noble wine cave and its place in American viticulture.

You're actively trying to be a fucking character in an anti-Howard Dean campaign ad from 2004. But actually speaking of which, Matt, though, I do have a line on this nice cask of a Montiano. You know him, you know him and a big Montiano head. You know it's my favorite. There's no come with me down to the cellar. You know what? I was a little worried. You know what?

I kind of, I kind of like, I was worried you were mad at me after I ventured upon insult that one time. But it's good to know that there's no hard feelings and you're going to show me your great Montiano. I'm over it. I know you guys saw, I know you guys saw Jane Lynch's tweet today by today, I mean a week and a half ago. Oh God, I feel like I'm in the fucking spaceship from Planet of the Apes just fucking circling

the earth and time is dilating, I'm in the fucking tube from 2001. My favorite part about that issue is just like, you know, billionaires deserve just as much voice as like the waitresses who serve them or the plumbers in my bathroom right now. Virgil, do you think specifically plumbers, let's say supers who try to fix bathrooms, do you think they deserve a voice in our politics? We might have to go off mic. Do you think they deserve a voice in our politics or something perhaps a little bit more stringent? Anything I say here will get me accused of being a PMC.

Any of my real views about the supers who come to your apartment to fix your toilets. December 20th, 2017, sweeping tax bill heads to Trump. Congressional Republicans score big legislative win with passage of one point five trillion dollar tax. I will know. That's probably the only big piece of legislation that Trump is talking about. Yeah, but you know what, that alone, like his presidency is already a success for the people who fucking voted for him.

Not the people who voted for him, the people who support him, he's given them what they want. We're probably going to be dealing with the ramifications of that for the next couple of decades. That tax bill is disgusting and just totally emblematic of everything evil and also efficient about even the idiotic presidency of Trump. I think that until this month, it was a powerful messaging thing to be able to say to his base, like the only thing this guy has done is give money to the richest corporations and billionaires.

Until this month, when the Democrats just handed him a big win on his trade renegotiation and the fucking military authorization to make his space force real, the fact that they fucking impeached him on the same day they signed off on the fucking reform, this guy who's a criminal, who's abusing his power and rewrote a fucking trade deal. We're going to sign off on that because it makes our fucking donors happy. That's what matters. And Pelosi herself fucking pushed hard for the passage of that trade deal. Just so, so good.

It's fucking good. She's a queen and she slays is the thing about 12, 12 dimensional chance. We're not. We're in the home stretch. No, guys. Woo. 20, 28, 2018, January 12th, Trump and Stormy Daniels. Trump lawyer arranged a hundred.

Oh, yeah. That real Trump lawyer arranged a hundred and thirty thousand dollar payment just before the election for adult film star silence about an alleged two thousand six sexual encounter with Trump. People familiar with the matter. Remember that? Remember that story? Here's what I'll say about the Trump story, Daniels thing.

And it is relevant to our current moment vis-a-vis Pete Buttigieg at his time at McKinsey. This is a great tweet, Will. Pete Buttigieg is claiming that he would love to tell everyone about his clients for the work he did at McKinsey, but unfortunately he can't because he signed an NDA. Oh, shoot. And he just honors the agreements that he takes seriously, just like, you know, the agreement we signed to tour all of Scandinavia, Australia and Micronesia before we go to Texas.

Baghdad. Yeah. Stormy Daniels broke the NDA that she signed with Trump after, you know, probably before fucking him so that she wouldn't tell anyone, I don't know, like soft serve comes out of his dick or something. No, she broke that because she is braver and more civically minded than Pete Buttigieg. Obviously. And Stormy Daniels, honestly, I think is a kind of a hero of contemporary American culture.

And let's not also forget, we talked about this on the show shortly after she did that, she was doing a gig at a strip club in Columbus, Ohio, where the police raided the strip club that night and arrested her on some bullshit trumped up charge that she's now just been acquitted of officially. And I think the police- They had trapped her on purpose. The police department had to have issued an apology about it as well. Because it was literally like a squad of like mega cops who want to do like a freelance

plumber op on behalf of their big, wet president. She paid an actual fucking price for what she did. So I just got to say, Stormy, you're a queen, like just- And it took a little longer than we said it would, but 100% happened. The president using campaign money to pay hush money to a porn star he had an affair with is now a thing that literally no one thinks about or talks about at all. I haven't thought about it probably months. If we had, if you, if that hadn't been in there, I might not have remembered to even

say, Hey, what about Stormy? Well, you know, I feel bad for Stormy because she got screwed by that attorney. Oh God. Michael Alvinani, just crime, just the man, the man loves crime and he wanted to run for president. He, well doing all of the crimes like he was doing a million crimes and running for president. And the thing is that's just like Trump cause remember Trump was like, Trump has been funnily

like fucking basically been a front man for a money laundering operation using real estate for like, at least his entire life. Well, I mean, at least the past decade, like since he became a brand, yeah, he's just been a funnel for Deutsche bank, like, like, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, like oligarch drug, uh, uh, uh, uh, drug and like who the fuck knows money getting laundered through the real estate in New York, New York, New York, and he still ran for president and that's like Alvinani. Like he's, he's, he's, he's stealing his own fucking clients, uh, settlements to like prop up his like coffee company.

That's what I fucking love so much about Alvinani. Remember that brief window and which he became a resistance hero? Alvinani is the exact same person as Donald Trump. It is so right down to the very specific details of his crimes and frauds and the only difference is that Alvinani is a little more in the gutters about it. He's more alpha. He's more of a, honestly, he is cause he's like, he's doing like the Howard Ratner like phone shit all day, like running around, getting all sweaty.

Whereas Trump is sort of in the Olympian, you know, office doesn't really interact with it as much. I do want to, uh, just to add that, uh, Pete did release his McKinsey client list, but only after McKinsey released the NDA. So he had to go to his old bosses, even though he's running for president and say, please may I, and they said yes. And then people are still finding discrepancy and I guarantee you they did not release any like full accurate accounting of any, like half of the shit he did, what his client,

who his clients were. Yeah. Exactly. I mean, just in that he did get the release and it's still fucked up and shady. Oh, you know, one organization that will never ever release someone from NDA is Chappell Trap House. Yeah, absolutely. Oh, absolutely.

Those are iron and clad. Thank God for that. February 14th, Parkland shooting again, it just, it's like, I know repetition is a good thing and art sometimes if it's handled artfully, but that was the first little, that was really when zoomer school shooting culture came into its own. You know, like the Parkland shooting is where like you started getting, you know, the kids who were, they got famous, you know, they had like a, they had a savvy built into them. You know, they, they did tick tocks.

And also there, but there was like, there was like the, there was like the Parkland kids who were like for gun control live streamed the shooting. And then there was the one kid who was like the pro MAGA pro gun. Kyle. Yeah. Yeah. The hogging. Okay.

Yeah. Kyle Cush bomb. Yeah. At least a couple of them fucking like live streamed the shooting. So like they've been documenting the entire thing since it happened. Interesting. The, the, you know, where are they now? The hog is increasingly talking about socialist shit.

Yeah. No, the hog is becoming a class first, a warrior. Yeah. No, he's being indoctrinated by Marxist professors. Yes. Yes. Actual Marxist professors as opposed to the fucking, you know, fake social justice. So, you know, system works.

Yeah. Here's another story about how the system works. February 25th, Xi era to continue in China, and hopefully soon by the way, he got rid of the term limit. You can be president for life. Just like Bloomberg. Yep. June 13th, Trump, Kim begin new phase of diplomacy.

North Korea's promise of denuclearization has few specifics. US president says military exercises will stop. This is a funny thing, and this is like one of the funny, like weird things about the Trump administration is that this literally only could have happened with him as president. Yes. Yes. And I would say him literally stepping over that line in the DMZ, into North Korea and shaking hands with Kim Jong-un, despite the fact that, you know, he's a fucking idiot

and the actual like denuclearization absolutely has happened or won't happen. This is a good thing. I'm sorry. I think it's a good thing. I mean, it was a good thing, and, you know, of course, all the liberals were mad about it, but it, you know, it objectively was a good thing, but it just all fucking fell apart. See, that's the thing.

Talks went nowhere with South Korea. And also, also, we did not actually suspend the fucking exercises. Trump just forgot about it, and all the generals just waited him out and said, okay, so we're going to do an exercise. That good, boss? And yeah, and they still have the troops there. Nothing has changed. The fundamentals are the same.

And yes, Trump's the only person who would have done that because Trump's the only person who's so fucking stupid that he doesn't realize that there is no fucking room on either side of that fucking negotiation to move, because they're not going to trust us. They're not going to fucking denuclearize and trust that they're going to get whatever they could get from us, which means they're never going to let go of their whole card. Especially if we're never going to move in the other, we're never going to move towards them because we require the getting rid of the actual nukes as the beginning thing. And they're not going to do that.

So it never would have worked. Nobody would have bothered with it. Also, Trump was such like a fucking pea brain and like, oh, he was like, oh, he was like, he was, he sent a nice letter to me. He's wonderful. He's a wonderful young man. I just wanted to like, let's do it for just the photo, especially because the other signature piece of form policy of the Trump administration is taking the complicated deal that we made

with another foreign adversary and do like, yeah, no, we're not going to do that. Also, just trying to fail around and like remake it basically from what it originally was literally just trying to make the same deal fucking Obama made, but like with Trump's name on it. So it's a defense bill that Pelosi's house just passed for bids a drawdown of the Korean Peninsula. How awesome. God, so good.

Okay. I would say like my last one, like I just think Trump and Kim Jong-un's friendship is like really sweet. It's interesting. I think it's nice. What are you talking about? Look, there's a lot of there's a lot of complicated issues and blocks between them, but I just want them to be together.

I want her to be happy. Yeah. It's yeah, it's a great long running reality show because like now now they're back to being enemies and they're sniping at each other. North Korea just said, we're going to play the do-tard card. We're going to flip out Donard, the most ferocious Pokemon of all do-tard. It's like, you know, you hang out with someone, you're like, you know, actually this person's not so bad.

Maybe you tell him a secret and you know, you bond over it and then you have another falling out and they're like, I'm going to tell everyone that you're a do-tard and it's just, it's just catty fucking bullshit. No, no, no, no fake friends on the Korean Peninsula. September 9th, CBS chief resigns. Leslie Moonves steps down amid sexual misconduct allegations. He was the TV Weinstein, got a lot less crap. Well, I mean, here's the thing though, like what I'll say about this story is like obviously

like, like again, unmentioned in the Wall Street Journal thing, like the fall of Roger Ailes and Fox News and like Bill O'Reilly and the fact that like, you know, now there's a fucking movie out about it that like, you know, Fox News is being run as just like a fucking like, just a sexual harassment factory and like, you know, up to, it was a conveyor belt up to and including a discuss the job of the hot, yeah, like at all their major talent at every level, like the systematic abuse of women who worked for that company was breathtaking. And like, of course, like they've let O'Reilly go and then Ailes died.

I have no faith at all that anyone's really been held to account for it. But the real story is shortly thereafter that Fox News, so evil, so bad, gross, awful, CBS, NBC, like all those fucking places were the same level of just like fucking sadistic, fucking like abuse and cruelty. Matt Lauer had a freaking button on his office desk to like trap women in his fucking dungeon. Les Muneves, all of these guys, every one of these fucking media networks, pure evil up and down. That's why I want to be the FCC chair hammer down November 12, California wildfire, complete

devastation, death toll, deadliest welfare in state history, 80% of the town of paradise destroyed. Again, another story again, natural disasters just seems to be getting a story is that Australia is having the hottest day ever. It was 105 degrees across the entire country. Brady said it was 115 degrees. That doesn't human in some places, but the total, the average, the temperature on the entire continent is 105 degrees.

That's not good. That's bad. So that's not a livable place. Oh, they're gone. How are you living there? No, it's funny because Australia has been like putting refugees trying to go to Australia in fucking camps in islands in the Pacific. And you know, in about 10 years, they're going to be calling on because they're mostly white.

They're gonna be fine. They're going to show up and become all the bartenders in London, so where they're going to go? Yeah, they love to go to London. Well, they have that sweetheart deal. You can get citizenship. Oh, yeah. I'm going to go anyway.

We can get some cocaine. You want to get some cocaine? I ran into some Australians right on this block this this week. I'm sorry. They were taking photos in front of the Brooklyn nine nine precinct. The right in front of here. And then they were at that one. That's the precinct.

Yeah. It's right on my life. No, it is not. It's like the 69th or something nice. And then they were like, how do we get? How do we get to the Brooklyn Bridge, Mike? And I was like, I don't know that fucking way. Did you ask if they knew mitbrady mitbrady?

I did not. You should have asked them because every every one knows mitbrady and then they were like, is it safe? What are you? What is this marathon man? Yes, it's safe. Is it safe to walk like daytime on a Tuesday down the middle of downtown Brooklyn? Remember when we ran into those Australians in Amsterdam and I asked them if they knew

mitbrady? Yes. They did not. Can you be from Australia and ask if something's fucking safe? Like you're half your content is on fire. Like in the other. Yeah. My mental image is mad.

Mad Max at this point. This place is the snakes. Okay. Here we are. 2019. The year that has just ended. That's right. It's 12 midnight.

China. January 3rd. China lands probe on moves far side. Wait a second. What's the story? I didn't even know. Yeah. China lands in a probe on the moon.

That's a problem. Sorry. Like all space stuff. That's not. We probed the moon already. Again. Yeah. All space stuff.

That's not, you know, pushing the envelope. Something new. Put a guy up there. If they put a guy on there, that'd be cool. If you make like a space hotel. That'd be fun. Yeah. That'd be amazing.

Anything else. Boring. Go to hell. Fuck off. Put guys in probe on Mars. It's like we've already done that. We got a big news story. We got some more fucking rocks.

We got some fucking rocks for you. Yeah. Fuck off. Do you guys know that there's a there was briefly in the 70s, a big mark black market for moon rocks? Were people selling them? Yes, because the US government as the only source of moon rocks in the world would periodically give them out as like little chunks of them as like a diplomatic plaques as like gifts

to foreign countries. I love it. Like they would get it. Yeah. Into the form into the black market and there are a few very colorful stories of you know people paying six figures, eight figures for moon rocks. I ever feel like I remember that one of these deals was done in a Denny's. I don't know.

It's a good one. But a lot of those, but a lot of those must have been fake fraud fraud, fraudulent rock. Anyway, who's going to know? How do you know? How do you ever know? I don't know. I'm sure there's probably a way. Good.

Good Wikipedia dive. Just sale of moon rocks. I'm sure there's probably a way. What are you going to say about that story? What if there was a talk about like, you know, putting on a putting a base or something on the moon? What if there was a moon weed now we're talking? Oh, hell yeah.

Smoking weed on the moon. Dude, what if you smoked weed on the moon, looking at the earth while you're smoking weed? Yeah, no bullshit though. That would be fucking awesome. That would be so fucking cool. You would jump up and never go. We know that would be terrifying.

That's literally my nightmare. But yeah, no, you're just like you're hotboxing one of those fucking spaces. The Apollo lander. Yeah. Yeah. You're cruising. You're tooling around on that go card up. Yeah.

Siphon blows. This sounds of like the premise of a Wayans brothers. Whole boys in outer space. Okay. March 13th. U.S. Grounds Boeing 737 Max. Oh, yeah. They program to crash, crash, everyone on board died because Boeing had the fucking

the patch and they made you fucking get a microtransaction to fix the fucking plan. And the entire code base was done by fucking Fiverr. They like what they went to like the Philippines and were paying people like fucking dollar an hour to fucking do code. I personally love that my my airplane flight functionality is DLC. Yeah. So those planes are still fucking grounded. I mean, once again, just sadly, nobody, no executive at Boeing is committed to Puku

yet. No, no. Just like ever more increasing like fucking like Marx Brothers levels of fucking like Prattfall absurdity of just like the fucking like just idiotic callous indifference to human life caused by fucking major corporations killing hundreds if not thousands of people over and over. And we need those corporations to make the innovation such as the planes that blow up. This is this is the search for profit in an ever shrinking profit environment.

Rate of profit declines and God damn it. You got to find it somewhere. You got to tap a new vein. What do you have to get? What if we would have programmed them to crash and then they had to pay more so that they don't crash? I will say I am mad. I'm mad that nobody's tried to bring the Concorde back.

Honestly, no one had problems. But the thing is, okay, yeah, one horrific crash, the one crash, it was so expensive. But the thing is, it was an accident. It was a free crash. And like it had like a comparable safety record to other fucking play. It was just that like it hit a fucking piece of metal on the fucking on the on the runway on the runway. It was a total freak accident.

Well, it wasn't it wasn't a problem with the fucking Concorde. And you know, I mean, the whole premise of like like international aviation is it gets better because every time it's a crash, like they investigate it, they make a report and that's, you know, that's faxed out to all the fucking aviation agencies who force the airlines to, you know, make some fucking change. And it's it's been an incredibly effective process. It's why flying is really fucking safe right now, you know, unless you're getting screwed by Boeing, of course.

So I mean, the Concorde, I mean, what you get from New York to London, like what, three hours? Less than that, I think. Like two and a half something. Yeah. Two and a half. And then we made this big sonic boom that pissed everyone off. March 20th.

Disney buys Fox Entertainment assets. Resistance is feudal. I know this is like another like a boring, like, you know, business Wall Street Journal type story. But this one actually I do care about because I think it's just such a fucking harbinger of just the absolute death of our culture. Oh, yeah. Yeah.

All culture produced by three companies. And the shit about one, eventually it'll happen. Right. We'll see a chapel trap house and positive America and who a media and the shit about them buying. We're a city area. Oh, that's right. Fuck.

The shit about them buying Fox, Fox Media, their entire back catalog, tons of classics of the golden era of Hollywood and being like, yeah, no, we're not going to put this shit. You'll never, ever be able to watch it in a theater. Yeah. Yeah. Which me and Will and Brandon James saw a year ago and a delightful theatrical presentation that's now not possible because you got to get it from the Disney Plus.

Yes. And yeah, so it's terrifying to imagine culture being just strangled by this just hive. But on the other hand, guys, baby Yoda, baby Yoda, let's give it up for Yoda, but a baby baby Yoda. He's a smaller, tinier version of Yoda who doesn't talk and he does cute little things with his hands. Wonder if Yoda was six inches tall and smoked weed. That's him.

That's the fifth. Fuck that guy. I've been thinking. I had this image in my head for a while now. What if you put on to baby Yoda Pharrell's hat? Well, you wouldn't be able to see him. It'd be too big for him. Yeah.

He would be completely fine. He would be totally subsumed by the hat. Ah, you would think so. But his ears would hold up the brim. I've had this image in my head for quite a while now, God. I don't want to know what other images are very attracted to it. DeviantArt.com slash Virgil Texas to see more of these images. April 10th first image of a black hole boring or the dense hole shown by

scientists six point five billion times as massive as the sun. We all saw the Michael Curry picture at the center of a galaxy. Fifty five million light years from earth. I guess just relevant because it's where we're all headed. Yes, one matter every single Adam in your body, every memory, every thought, every fragment of human culture obliterated is heading there to be pulled apart at a subatomic level. A dense hole is a phrase that's going to be rattling around my

around my head. I mean, I know the truth, which is that all of this is just a big simulation for me personally. And that when I die, you know, I wake up in a pod somewhere and everyone's like, so did you like it? And I like that. And then they're all like, I'm not having a fucking party for you. And then they're all have a party for me.

You wake up from the simulation. They're like, did you like here? Like, yeah, it's fine. They're like, look, everybody's having a party in the simulation and you're not there. Dude, they're all having a party back. No, it wasn't there. Hey, time it up.

Time it up at last. Okay, getting to the very end here. June 9th, Hong Kong protests. I do not want to say anything about this because people will get mad at me one way or the other. But your voice in either way would have such a huge impact on it. I do like when they use the lasers to shoot down drones.

That's smaller. That's the kind of technology we're all going to have to learn honestly. Yeah. Because the technical, the technological asymmetry between power and power list is already staggering. It's only going to get worse. But the beauty, the only good news is that there are, you know,

low tech solutions to some of these things. Yes. I have no opinion on the Hong Kong protests other than that. It is cool to watch those videos where like two guys defuse a smoke bomb in like two seconds. Okay. September 24th, Pelosi announces impeachment in Korea. Oh, a great idea that worked well.

I mean, I guess like when it happened, I was like, yeah, they should do it. Like, I mean, technically. Well, they should do it because what else are they going to do? I mean, what else are they going to do? Or like, but looking back at it now, it's like, what a fucking waste of time. They jumped on the fucking Ukraine thing.

That was their fucking mistake. But I mean, that's like the thing. They were so let down by the fucking Mueller report being a big bust. And then Trump does the thing, which is actually criminal. It's actually a fucking quid pro quo thing. And they thought, okay, now we got him. Once we tell the American people about this, and we teach them

all the goddamn Ukraine names and tell them about all the fucking junior sub ambassadors and consular officers who are goddamn mother shitting American patriots, they're going to rally to our side. And these Republicans rally to our side and we'll have like 60% for removing the fucking guy. And just like to underscore as well, since Trump started Trump's approval rating has gone up.

Yeah. Well, I mean, Marge, I mean, I really think that's just kind of the general variation. Nothing's moving. Nothing's really fucking moving. So I think, yeah, they made a mistake by limiting it to that instead of like alternate idea. How about just have months of impeachment hearings where it's

crime of the week and you just bring in fucking people like subpoena fucking Jared Kushner, you've got a shitload of crimes out of that motherfucker. You could spend fucking sweeps month doing just Kushner. How about this? How about this? Snacking Jared Kushner on the head. You can fit so many crimes in this guy.

Right. But here's the problem. Here's the problem. I wonder if, I mean, like this is a total counterfactual, but I do wonder if, you know, okay, if you'd done that, would you just run into the same problem, which is, well, Trump says a bad thing. He's like, does a fucking evil fucking racist thing every fucking week

or a buffoonish thing every week or a new crime every week. And like, we all just kind of forget about it. If you did that, would it just be have the same problem? Yeah. Or would it just like, but still, I mean, we're just saying, okay, our expectations are low. We know the Senate will never ever move them. So why not just turn the whole thing into a fucking campaign

ad for the Democrats for the next fucking year instead of having a finality where, okay, now we're done. And it goes to the Senate who's going to totally, you know, in Trump's pocket. Here's my idea. Take a page out of Trump's own playbook when he did honestly one of the best things he's ever done, which is bring all of Bill Clinton's accusers to the debate.

They should just have every one. He's done a sex crime to testify in front of Congress. I honestly don't think they should have done it at all. And I don't think there's any way to make it work because what you're going to do, we're going to say he does crimes. Everyone knows he does crimes. No one cares. People have processed that into their view of him, either good

or bad, or they ignore it. It's like we just had a fucking revelation of a Pentagon paper style trail of lying at every level of government about Afghanistan since the moment it happened. Nothing but lies, lies, lies. And it made no ripple in opinion. It made no impact on anything because we all knew that. And we all know that Trump's crooked.

I honestly don't know if there's any real fucking leverage there or mileage to get out of it. I feel like everyone just tunes this shit out at this point. Okay. You and I agree that the source of Trump's power is that everyone knows he's a crook, but his supporters think he's a crook for me. Exactly.

I'm in on the grift. He's on my side. It seems to me that a better thing to go after is not some inscrutable Ukraine name thing, but the emoluments thing. Like an old school, an old school crime of avarice. People are literally giving this guy money. Yes. It's something that everyone can wrap their heads around.

Remember that Chinese masseuse who just bought her way into the fucking Mar-a-Lago and just... That's the tip of the fucking iceberg. Exactly. You get what I'm saying. That kind of old school... Hang on, hang on. That kind of old school, he's greasing his fucking palms.

That, I think, becomes a little more unforgivable and starts to pierce the protective layer around Trump. That just shows him from what we all know him to be, which is a totally selfish, self-interested individual. That's what when Hughes says, like, crooked Hillary, what people imagine is like, oh, she's taking money to change her mind on shit. And he's literally just taking money through his businesses that

he said he was going to divest himself right. So he's never really been very good at prosecuting this point. And I remember when Hillary said at the debates, he didn't pay his architects. Like, what the fuck are you talking about? But the one problem that they run into is, oh, well, we also kind of do stuff like that, too, like all of us. So...

But the other point I want to make is that, you know, I thought very early on before this Democratic House was sworn in that okay, they should do impeachment because, one, yes, he's doing all the goddamn crimes, and two, like, what else are you going to do? That's like the least worst thing you fucking people are going to do, because if you're not doing impeachment, you're just giving a blank check to all the fucking shit that he wants,

which we're already doing anyway. But if you're not with impeachment, you can come up with the works a little better and also, like, just create so much chaos in the White House and, like, so, like, just discord and mistrust, you know, like... Make all these rats turn on each other, yeah. Yeah, exactly. Exactly.

Like, you're seeing with Giuliani right now. So, like, that's good. And to fuck up the administration is just a good thing. Right now, I mean, I'm still, like, honestly on a knife's edge about it. I mean, it's obviously not going to get removed from office, and it obviously hasn't moved the needle at all. But the one thing that, you know, I'm sympathetic to is that,

you know, Republicans have done a good job of throwing up so much fucking flak that nobody knows which way is up. And that's not, I mean, obviously they were going to do that in any event, but I don't know. I mean, it's like, even if it's an unwinnable fight, it's to some degree, it's worth doing. It's just not worth devoting any energy to. It's not worth any normal person paying attention to it

or fucking definitely not, like, driving somewhere and, like, holding a sign. Especially when the result is foregone, that it will mean nothing, practically mean nothing. I think that the fundamental dilemma at the heart of impeachment was always that no matter how you imagine impeachment, it's going to be carried out by the House Democrats. So any version of it will be the worst possible version of it

because of who's carrying it out. And that means that you can't imagine an ideal impeachment that gets at your points and, like, undermines Trump's arguments to the working class or whatever. The reality is it will be Nancy fucking Pelosi and Steny Hoyer and these fucking squid monsters doing the actual job of putting together a case. And lo and behold, it's terrible.

Well, of course it is. They are terrible. I mean, I'm just saying that your actions should not be dictated by the fact that, you know, the Republicans are going to lie and they're going to obfuscate and they're going to misdirect people in this nature. I mean, are you supporting impeachment against George W. Bush? It would have been futile, would not have passed the Senate, and the same thing would have happened, essentially.

Ultimately, I mean, like, you know, we talked about this on a recent episode, but the whole thing is just going to be a wash. It's just going to be a big fucking who care. The only thing I really do worry about is once Trump is, you know, acquitted by the Senate, you can't really impeach him again. You can't do it again. I mean, there's no double jeopardy clause in the Constitution. No, there isn't, but like, a practical matter, like, you know,

Pelosi had to be fucking pulled into doing this. She's definitely not going to do it again. That literally means that he's above the law. It's like a fucking dog wearing an electronic fence collar who realizes that it's been shut off. But that was going to happen anyway, so that means you never should have done it. If you knew, if the, if him giving, getting a state,

a seal of approval from the Senate is a green light towards total unleashed rapacity, then he never should have been impeached because that was the foregone conclusion, no matter what your strategy was the entire time. Honestly, I really think that's the best case, and that, you know, might be, you know, tipping the scales in my mind, because I think it's pretty clear right now

that, you know, it's not moving the needle at all. It's not like changing anyone's fucking mind. It doesn't matter. Anyone who's saying like, oh, this is get out the vote for Trump, sorry, no one's going to fucking remember. No, no, it really doesn't matter. It doesn't matter one way or the other. But, and you know, I'm sorry, Contra, Sam Cedar,

it's not really going to fucking matter in the Senate races. No. But like that actual one thing where Trump is like, oh, I'm a God. Okay, cool. I can do whatever I want. Well, she already does to some degree, but he also seems really screwed up when people say you can't do that.

And he just like gets into these like weird little fucking shit fits all the time. Yeah. One of you just like, yeah, I'm a golden God. I can do whatever I want. I don't have to worry about Nancy Pelosi. I'm just going to do crimes in front of you now. I'm just going to interfere with the election,

you know, shut down some fucking voting precincts in black neighborhoods. Yeah, what are you going to do? Daddy gets three scoops of ice cream tonight. What are you going to do? Impeach me again. Ooh. Yeah.

So, you know, fucking mask off. Not as good. I don't think. All right, guys. Are you ready for the very last story of the decade that matters and has defined our era? Yes. Ready for this one?

December 3rd. Google co-founders step aside. Shut the fuck up. There you have it, folks. How about the decade that was? December 3rd. A date that would live in infamy. How about the real last story?

11.59 p.m. December 31st. Podcasters remain friends forever. Aw. Oh, wait. What the fuck? Turn it to MBC. Oh, yeah. Turn it to MBC.

Okay. Here we go. The ball? Oh, there it is. There it is. The ball's coming out. Here we go. Ready? Do you have any New Year's wishes?

No, let's count it down. Here we go. Here we go. It's going. 10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1. Happy New Year. 20. Oh, 20.

20. He forgot. 30.20. 30.20. 30.20. 30.20. All right. Before we go, look at you guys.

We won non-political prediction for 2020. One resolution if you've got one. Oh, non-political prediction. This is really tough. Yeah, it's a pretty tough one, Will. You know, we eat, sleep, and breathe politics. We are. All right.

I'll go out on a limb. I think this is going to be the year that a like a big Disney Marvel project fails. Okay. I'll throw one out there. I think that I don't know what happens this year, but I think it's happening soon. A big social media backlash and a backlash against social media and for like smaller like networks like blogs. Well, not like blogs, but more like imagine like a smaller, like independent, like decentralized

social media network, smaller connections and like a resurgence in, you know, privacy as opposed to what we've seen in the past several years, which is putting all your thoughts out there and monetizing them. By the way, patreon.com slash chatbotrackhouse. I'd say there's going to be a 50% increase in blood dimmed tides being loose and at least a 75% increase in Falcons not being able to hear falconers. So also the bucks are going to win the basketball championship. We'll be betting our entire patreon in 2020 on that outcome happening.

Yes. Go to Mohegan Sun right now. Prediction a sports will happen. My prediction is 2019. There's like this, this movement started, but I really think in 2020, it's going to fully blossom in 2020, dudes will continue to rock and in 2020 dudes have nowhere to go, but up, but up solidarity, solidarity. I got high, high hopes for dudes and you just wait 2021.

No gender. Well, we got one more year to make hay while the sun shines and I genuinely though to all of you guys listening out there resolutions before the resolutions for all of you listening out there, what 2019 was, we've just capped off this entire horrible decade 2019. That was practice. Yes. 2020 is the playoffs. Yeah.

What happened to the regular season? We were surpassed. We just 20 that was 2016 to 2019. Okay. And then we went back into practice. So we're practicing regular season like January 2019 that was, that was the preseason and this year. That's not how it works.

Regular season. The regular season. We were doing spring training sometime mid 2017. I mean, I think the point here is that 2020 is the playoffs. Okay. And the finals are 2021. No, no, it's, it's the play, it's just, it's the whole enchilada. Well, you play off to determine who plays in the playoff as a Democratic primary.

The fucking finals is the general. That's all 2020. Yeah. Oh, you understand where I'm going with this now? Yeah. Okay. Resolutions. What's spring training?

Resolutions. Anyone? Resolutions. Yeah. I like Bernie. Next. Don't die. Try not to die for a year.

I am going to hit it hard in January to be less conscious of what I eat, be less active. I'd like to go outside a lot less. Yeah. I'd like to be sort of like physical exertion. I'd like to avoid that as much as possible and like just, just this is a bunch of different drugs I'd like to try. Oh yeah. I've heard a lot of good things about Chinese research or just, or just do more of in general.

Yeah. It's, it's for me. I mean, the Dundam. Yeah. I like Bernie and do less growth. No. No growth. Oh yeah.

Oh yeah. Yeah. No growth 2020. Do a shrinkage. Ignore. Yeah. Even more than multiplicity. My resolution is the same resolution I've had for the last five or six years.

Game more. I always, I always want to play more video games, but I always push myself. What game do you want to play next? That's the thing. What I really want to play is Age of Empires 2 on my MacBook, but I can't fucking figure out these emulator systems. If anybody has any recommendations for something that is, they're not very good. Like that, like Age of Empires 2, that I can play on my Mac, hit me up in the DMs.

Well, if you can figure it out, we'll play together. Age of Empires 2? Yeah. Hell yeah. Let's get a stream going. Hell yeah. Overall, now that it is officially 2020, we're in a new decade, 2020, the thing that will remain the same, like everything that has happened since March 3rd, 2016, Chapo Trap

House will continue to slay and continue to be the best of friends. Yes. That's true. Friends forever. And really quick, before we go, tickets are on sale, Iowa, New Hampshire, Nevada, February. Come out to see us at House of Blues in Las Vegas, at some other place rather than Derry, New Hampshire, and another venue in Iowa City, Iowa. The Engleberg Humphrey.

The Engleberg Humphrey. The Engleberg Humphrey. The Engleberg Humphrey. The Engleberg Humphrey. The Engleberg Humphrey. The Engleberg Humphrey. Engleberg. If you're there, check it out.

We will see you in those states, elect and Bernie, with you. We're in your states, elect and Bernie. Bernie's going to win. Have a good 2020. See you all in that year. Bernie or Tilleria is guided by God. Till next time. Love you guys.

Bye-bye. The Engleberg Humphrey. The Engleberg Humphrey. The Engleberg Humphrey. Get it.