Chapo Trap House - 766 - Mt. EverQuest (9/11/23)

Episode Date: September 12, 2023

Forgetful 9/11 to all our listeners. We start today’s show with an examination of the various kinks of American states. Then: Elon aka Mr. Too-Damn-Cap claims to have disabled starlink to scuttle a drone attack in Ukraine; and a chronical of the various humiliations Rudy aka Mr. Too-Damn-9/11 has suffered lately. Finally, a harrowing piece on the private companies attempting to foist metaverse VR into children's education. Link to Karl Stevens’ and Jaime Lee Curtis’ new graphic novel Will plugs at the end of the show: https://bookshop.org/p/books/mother-nature-jamie-lee-curtis/18322363?ean=9781787739130

Music Hello friends, it's Monday September 11th. This is your choppo coming out. You'll hope everyone is having a wonderful 9-11 and you know just dancing dancing dancing dancing that's what people do on 9-11 and it's what's trending on Twitter right now. Sometimes you want to cut loose footloos kick off your Friday shoes. We're just talking before we started recording today and I feel like we we have ended up recording on 9-11 like like a number of episodes, like a number of Mondays, you know, but you know, the original one happened on a Tuesday, but

I mean, it is sort of the ultimate Monday. So yeah, it's fitting, you know, oh boy. Yeah, it's it's the Monday of American Civilization. And we hate it. Our fields, he hates 9-11. Yeah. But I hope everyone's doing good, having fun. I guess I'd like to begin today. Did you guys see the list of the most popular kinks rated by state, according to FETLife.com? I was personally very, very disappointed and annoyed. I want to get to each of our home states

and some of the better results here. This is like disproportionately the highest searches for civic kinks and fetishes by state from the website that life. Beginning with my home state of New York, a number one fetish, human ash tray. Human ash tray, which I think is very very I think it's very fitting for New York You know because it's it's the city's dirty. Well like how do they know that it's like a kink search

Because like I could I mean I search for that a number of times while I was living in New York myself But not for sexual reasons. I just you were just searching for one and one. Yeah, yeah, just somebody to come out and extend his hands for me to just put my cigarette out of it. Yeah, I wanted like a drifter who I could humiliate, not, not sexual stuff. No, no, I'm not a bad person. No, yeah. Yeah, no, me, most of the people when I lived in the Upper West side, most of the people in my building had one of those. And I thought, oh, just a guy who followed them around.

Yeah, behind them. Yeah, a lot of guys would empty their pipes into his mouth. Mm-hmm. I've had so many problems with traditional asterisks, you know, containing all the ashes and whatnot. And I think the human aster estuary is the way to go. They won't spill a drop if you ash in their mouth in their hands or just put a cigarette out on them.

But yeah, I remember as a kid growing up, like an arts and crafts class, my parents didn't smoke, but I still I brought them home a human estuary. And they'd be like, what the fuck am I going to do with this? Of course, moving on to Felix Illinois, your home state. The number one finish in Illinois is business suits. Business suits. Yeah, okay. Okay.

So, like, what is their methodology here? Are they getting like top results they search for like on porn hub or fat life? No, this is based on how disproportionately users from that state like, like that kink when compared to other states. Oh, okay. So like, this is, I heard a similar thing about Iran that their top porn search term was like hotel business man. I remember that.

Yeah. Which is like, you know, suggests that like, you know, for 20 years, there was one porno circulating in all of Iran. And it just depicted like a guy in hotel, like having sex could be a similar thing. Or maybe we're just, as I've always thought, a state of go getters. Yeah. Yeah, you know, I don't see you at the club. Well, I don't see you at the bank, fucking someone in a business suit. I always think about like those fetishes, like, you know, how it would be kind of good to be

a foot fetishist because just like, you know, if you live in a warm climate or even if you, you know, you just watch a lot of TV. There are a lot of feed out there. There's a lot of material. Yeah. But like if you're a business suit guy, oh my god, all you have to do is just get an office job. Well, not now, not now. I mean, now you better be like a best fetishist. It's quite like, nobody's willing to give you anymore. Yeah. Like, you know, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, you could go to the airport and see people who dressed up to fly somewhere. Now everybody just dresses like a pig, including myself. So you're never even going to see a cool suit at the airport even, just some guy and a fucking NFL jersey of some kind covered and mustard. Yeah, it used to be everyone put on a suit to fly. Now, yeah, the only people who like put on a suit to fly, or it's someone who like just killed both their parents.

Yeah, and the pilot. And that usually, they a lot of times they don't even have a code on that thing. It's just a good short sleeve shirt. Get the fuck out of here. Okay, yeah, but like if you were a business suit guy and like, you know, 2000, oh yeah.

Then it's like amazing, probably. You know, like here in New York, there's all kinds of like, you know, mournful warnings about like all this commercial real estate going unused, because of all this like, you know, office spaces that's unleashed. I think the city of Chicago, she'd get on it and like have some sort of like Sarah McLaughlin

and a plaintive tone talking about like for just three cents a day, you can fill these corridors with hot men and women in business suits for you to jack off to. Yeah, like there's a derth of it. Everyone in Chicago is wearing like a Chicago Bears burlap sack, which is just a zero zero football on the back. I wonder if like if you're a business suit fetishist, if like the more intricate the suit,

like the hotter it, like, like what's the criteria? Like I use it as like, do you get harder for like wider lapels? Like it's not like a big dick. Do you want smaller lapels? It's more expensive. If you were watching like mad men

and you see a three-piece suit, is that just like seeing like huge tits? Yeah. I don't know. I think it's sort of like, I think business suit is maybe like a Jason to teacher or nurse in that like I think it's guys who want women. It's just sort of embody some sort of professional position of authority over them. Yes. It's like an 80s video. She takes the glasses off. Yes. Yes. Exactly. I do wonder though if they have their own like, yeah, they're perverts within the pervert community. Like the people who are really into those giant baggy 90s suits,

like you're a pervert if you like that. I'm sorry, even amongst the suit people, that's a terrible look. They call it be trading tapes of the 1999 NBA draft. I'm getting sensitive federal prison because I tried to download Shaquille O'Neal on draft day on public Wi-Fi. Matt, I will get to your home state, but I do, I would like to note that right next to Illinois, the state of Indiana, their most preferred fetish is just come lynching.

Just come. Yeah, simple people. Yeah, there's a couple of states that are like, okay, this is where the normal people still live. And it's Indiana with calm. West Virginia is just big tits. It's like, that's right. That's Virginia. I don't need to get all fancy. No, just take me home. Yeah, Those big jugs are where I belong. Give me some dang hooters. Okay. Now, now, Mama, talk about that. Indiana is come, but Matt, please, please, please account for Wisconsin.

Oh, God. What fetish diapers. Dipper. Dipper. Come on people. You're making me look bad here. Dippers. And the thing is, if you look at any map of binge drinking

in America, and more specifically, public drinking in America, and this is the important part, it's Wisconsin. Wisconsin doesn't necessarily drink much more than the rest of this alcoholic country. The difference is that there's more public consumption of alcohol in Wisconsin. There's a disproportionate number of bars

that people go to to drink. Like New Hampshire has a similar level I just saw that but they all just stay in there discuss their hovels and drink it alone like the insane Puritans that they're descended from yeah, I just under those which with the fucking fifth the jaymas But in Wisconsin you go out and drink and if you're out of the bar tonight and you break the seal What do you got to do yeah from having to go home and that is slap out of the diaper. If you got to go to Lambo Field and you've had 15 beers before they open the gates, how are you going to watch the game without missing the action? Motherfucking diaper. So they just incorporated it into the

sexual realm in the realm of the senses. Indeed. Yeah. No, actually, I just thought about New Hampshire that they have Wisconsin level drinking, but like they have just gone to the wrong. They have the least amount of bars of, you know, like, you know, per square mile of any state in America. Yeah. It's all about how alcohol is incorporated into your culture. And Wisconsin really is the only place in the country I'm aware of that has a open, publicly affirmed culture of

alcoholism, where alcoholism is a positive social trait to have and is reinforced that way. We, I think that's unique in that respect. Is this the cultural legacy of the, of the party Germans? The party Germans indeed. The Catholics, other Germans, the Pavilion types. They came in and they said, fuck all this noise. We just want to grill and get shit-faced. And they have done so for about 200 years now. God bless them.

It's, yeah, no, it's amazing. Yeah, there's just less public stigma on being drunk. There's less public stigma on drinking a lot every night. And so more people are willing to do it in front of others instead of trying to hide it from them, their families, their friends, and also from the people who call and ask how much they drink, which is why you have like these maps where nobody drinks in the Bible belt.

Okay, sure. And why? I gotta say, I've talked to you about this before, Matt, but since becoming sort of, I don't know, semi-Wisconsin adjacent, I really do appreciate the Wisconsin Supper Club culture. Oh, Jamie. That should be expand. I think other states really need to get on to this supper club lifestyle. It's a really it's a pleasant innovation of bringing together both bar and sort of casual

dining and gambling. Okay. So you saunter into the the supper club and it will be covered in some sort of some sort of fur on the walls or wood paneling, but it will be darkly lit. This is very important. Nice leather bank head type tables. Oh, yeah. And a nice bar that you sit in for about 45 minutes

to an hour before you are seated and have two or three cocktails. Not beers, cocktails, because you're going out. It's a night on the town. You don't drink beers for literally every other minute. Beer don't get you drunk. Beer don't get you drunk. That's just my way.

You order a brandy old fashioned, the state beverage of Wisconsin, which is an old fashioned and you're like, what about brand, what, what, yes, that's right, with Brandy. It's sweet as hell. And it is the reason that Wisconsin accounts for, this is true, 80% of America's brandy consumption. Because they're the only bars, they're only bars in the country that are poor and brandy all the fashions. You have two bars in New York. Don't even stock brandy.

Like, yes, you go back into the incredibly dimly lit dining area where there's big tables and and bankets and there's leather usually. And there's a salad bar with a bunch of very heavy dressings like, you know, Russians in there, you know, you're going to have like some some sort of bacon-based vinaigrette, which one time I went into a separate club. I was a kid. And I saw this like bubbling cultured with bacon in it and I thought it was soup. So I put it in my soup bowl and I got to the table and I'm like, this is way too salty. And I'm like, yeah, that is a bacon vinaigrette salad dressing.

That's it. I'm that's insane. I'm like, who would guess that? And then you order maybe like a plight or a fried shrimp and then you get like a nice room temperature prime rib or something like that or a big hunk of of a cod or something. Something from the lake maybe. That lake trout. And it's delightful. Yeah, it's like it's really cool. It's a fun place by alcohol.

Yeah, just a quick, a few more highlights from the, from the America, the state of fetish. California's number one fetish is something called decrypthelia, denodacrophilia, which I thought is a pretentious assholes. It's a fear. It's a fetish. I'd refer to tears. It's people have a fetish for tears and crying. Oh my God. Yeah, that's sick. The skate was right. I apologize to Jack Pesobiac.

That's there's no way to explain that other than Hollywood's literal Hollywood sickos, like Mason Verger getting the child tier to decorate his martini. Sickos. Yeah. Let destroy the state. Please break us off with this fucking San Andreas fault. Virginia has interrogation.

This one free. Yeah. This one no, but wait. Right. That acres that freaked me out the most I mean the California ones like gross, but it's like You know you can kind of you kind of see it coming right? It's yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm gonna go out there right the hottest thing to them is like a Crying actress being like please I have to get this part and like a sort of like musanex shaped man

But for like interrogation I never even entertain that as opposed never occurred to me that that was a whole Category yeah, they really take their work home Yeah, yeah, I mean, oh if you if you if you like what you do you'd never work it in your life I think that's the way to treat enhanced interrogations. Yeah. I like that uh, that there's this interrogation and West Virginia is as big to that's right, baby. That's what happens when you secede from the South because you don't have enough slaves

to care. Yeah. You guys go ahead and worship the death star of power. We'll be over here motorbought and some big old titties in the hall. Real quick, what's the, what's the, what's a high, oh, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi,

hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, hi, oh, hi, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, hi, oh, hi, hi, oh, hi, hi, oh, hi, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, hi, oh, hi, hi, oh, hi, hi, oh, hi, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, hi, hi, oh, hi, hi, oh, hi, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, hi, oh, hi, oh, hi, Oh my god. Are they are they only pulling like eight year olds like what the fuck? I mean, these are these are these are these are fat life wet wet you know users who are like you know in look this is out of this not a poll of like the state overall. This is a poll of people in the first meeting with each and within each state. You know, so it's not necessarily reflective of the broader character of this state.

But what I will say is that I think the lesson of these state by state fetishes is that each state takes its work home with them. Yes. I will try to interrogate the Ohio one psychologically. I think it's because Ohio, right across the river from Kentucky where real tobacco land starts. So it is close, but not exactly that. So what do you fetishize things that are nearby, but withheld a little bit of taboo.

That's what I'm beginning to covet. One cup of, one of the things that we do to covet. That's what I like about the West Virginia thing is like you're like presumably you're already amount around like like minded fetishes and know, you're either like a gross, kinky married couple or just like a greasy sex guy. And you're like, oh, I can get into the most insane things here. Like things that I could, you know, do with a normal partner.

Big tips. You can't find tips anywhere else but the fetish community. I was speaking of Kentucky, another normal state. Kentucky's number one fetish panties. That is so innocent. Okay, yeah. They're all freshmen perverts over there.

They just started out and being perverted. And then I got to say, like, easily the lamest state with like the lamest dumbest fetish is, you know, and it would have to be the state of Oregon for their fetish pirates. Oh God. That's Portland for you. Pirates. Yeah. Portland.

For it was the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, what was the epic bacon city? It was the place where people went to do epic internet stuff and then body the epic internet life. Yeah, that's Philadelphia now, but how easy we forget.

Pennsylvania is bootlicking. It's, oh, they play gritty during the day, but they bootlicked the fashion. That's what they're doing over there in Philadelphia. So yeah, that's it for a breakdown of the America's fetishes by state. All right, next thing I want to talk about, the story happened over the weekend. I'm just going to ask you guys, what the fuck is going on with this like Elon Musk starlink thing where he said that like by turning off his satellite, he stopped the

he stopped an attack of basically Ukrainian drone submarines destroying the Russian naval fleet in Sevastopol. And look, I think Matt, your inclination on this when we were discussing those correct, is it like any story that Elon Musk just assumed is just a drill ship? Yeah. Yeah. I mean, like, and then the Walter Isaacson biography is like, there's a lot of, that's getting a lot of coverage to him that like he seemed to let this slip

in a Washington Post excerpt over the weekend. And what I will say is if it is true, cheers to Comrade Elon Musk for throwing a wrench in the spanners of the American military industrial complex. Cheers to the American military industrial complex for not immediately killing him for doing that. I mean, how, if this really happened, how can there be a meaningful deep state? How is there anything besides a bunch of bureaucrats just doing their jobs and no coordinating

intelligence? How do you let this happen? The only explanation is, yeah, you privatized everything. And with privatization came a real lack of capacity and power that you can't even though you still have the formal structures They don't They're not invested with the same Capacities because you fucking auction them off and now this gomer can go out there and just be like hey Yeah, I'm your only access to these battlefields and I'm going to make a decision on what to do in them and have them be

Like oh, yeah, you got to die. We're, we're, we're gerard bullying your ass right now. And it's not like they'd even have to kill them. Like he's the most overexposed guy on earth. There could be a, they could march and call his ass with a snap of a finger. And yet he's still out there doing this. And even if he is lying, they're letting him go out there

and say he did this. It's not so much that he's lying as much as he's like most generously. I could say he's stretching the truth because as far as I understand, this was like 20 drones that like the doge-avvy guys bought online. This wasn't like a critical mass of like good deep state drones. This was like um, uh, so This was like, um, oh, okay. So it's like, something enthusiastic amateurs trying to go along. Yeah.

But at the same time, you know, it's like if this was not even like the dullest brother show, if James Baker was still here, you know, Elon would be found, you know, auto-orotic asphyxiation. Yeah. How hard would that be? one would be found, you know, auto-erotic, esphyxiation. How hard would that be? How hard would it be to kill this guy in a way that was be plausible that he died that way? Well, that's what makes the military budget so offensive.

It's like, I'm supposed to be invested in this and you won't even, like you won't even kill him. You won't even do this. You're still giving him contracts. Yeah, it's like, oh, this thing's just a giant money spigot that sprays money at interested parties and rentiers. And that's it. That's all it does. It's just an on-off switch. Cool. Good luck making democracy with that. And you know, it provides a good opportunity. I mean, because, you know, you won't must, isn't he like probably the biggest government contractor

in the world for the US? I mean, he's one of them. And in state, his whole edifice is powered by that. Just like with fucking base house, where the only thing he has that actually makes money is the fucking government contracts and the web services. The only thing, the only real cash flow going into any tusk business is government fucking contracts. Sure shit isn't the cars or anything else. Yeah, and like, similar with Bezos,

you begin to ask the question like, oh, he has all these government contracts. Like, why don't they pull them or like rap as knuckles or something, and I think at a certain level of government contracting, it begins to get like hazy as to who's the government and who's not. And he would write it exactly. I'm like, you know, but with Musk now,

I mean, like this provides him a good opportunity to, I don't know, promote a I'm like, you know, but with Musk now, I mean, like this provides him a good opportunity to I don't know, promote a kind of like, you know, his vision of global leadership or like, you know, Oh, I don't want I don't want Starlink contributing to war or death and like, you know, at least at least portray what seemingly is a moral stance. But I just I really wonder if the country in question where you if the country in question was not Ukraine and Russia, but anything to do with Saudi Arabia, what he would have done there, like, you know what I mean? Like, like, what the Saudis are doing with Twitter. I mean, before he was took over the company and certainly now that it's X or

whatever, like, you think of like, if Starlink was going to be used to like, I don't know, shoot some migrants crossing a border and the Saudis wanted to use it to do that. You think he would turn off the juice? I highly doubt it. Well, no, it's because he's part of an emerging and sort of unself-consciously, spontaneously organizing extractor revolt against global capitalism. That includes private actors like Musk and also governments like Saudi Arabia's that are pushing against a greater American-led power formation that they are increasingly seeing individually as against their interests. But they can't coordinate because they're fucking lumpin' forces, so they just act independently, they push against it and by so doing form this unconscious block now. And yeah, it's, it's, it's, it's the homeowners association revolt against global capitalism. I guess the other highlight from the like the Walter Isaacson book is the revelation

that fucking like the new names of his fucking kids with grimes, including one that was first of all, I didn't, I thought he had one. Do you know about, yeah, these two loves having kids, he loves having kids. Well, yeah, because he's got a spread of seed, because he's such a fucking genius. No, but like one of the kids names is a techno-mechanicus

or something like that. Mechanicus, epic. Just, just fucks it, Matt and Roman. Just fuck you. It's a thing is he said he's epic. And there are amazingly people who see him and his opposition to global capitalism. However, they conceive it or he does. As oh, this guy is an ally in like some populist battle against capital, but he's a complete moron who privatization and neoliberalism has allowed to achieve this insane position

of autonomous power. and he's going to use it like the dumb baby he is. He's not going to use it constructively. He can't. If he could, he wouldn't have it. They only gave it to him because of what the system selects for, which is the most empty, headed, and it's hearted, freaks on earth. I guess like the other bit of news over the weekend, a bit of celebrity news.

Has anyone's PR department fucked up worse than Ashton, Kutcher, and Mila Kunis? And now I say that, but then I remember that their PR department is probably the Church of Scientology. So when like other people might advise you, it's a bad idea to write a letter to the judge on behalf of your friend, the rapist. They just decided to go ahead with it.

I'm guessing maybe because the Church of Scientology has some dirt on them, but did you actually read the letter that Ashden Kutcher wrote to the judge in this case? No. Yeah, yeah, it's pretty, it's pretty incredible. So my favorite part is like, time that we would meet someone who was on drugs, dealing drugs or saw drugs, he would tell me that we were going to avoid that person forever. And that's what made me the guy I am today. Yeah. It says here, my name is Ashton, your judge, Olmeudo. I am Ashton. My name is Ashton Kutcher.

I'm an actor, investor, philanthropist, and most importantly, a father. I met Danny Masterson when I was 20 years old in 1998. He instantly became a friend, dedicated to a worker, and role model to me. He was remained as such for 25 years. He talks about like he saved him from a life of being a Hollywood drug addict because he like, he says, I'm grateful to him for that positive peer pressure. I attribute not falling into the typical Hollywood life of drugs directly to Danny. Anytime that we were, we were to meet someone, it would interact with someone who was on drugs or did drugs, he made it clear that he wouldn't be a good person to be friends with.

And like, I remember his character on that 70 show was the pot head. So he's advertising a drug, a drugged up lifestyle is something funny and cool, but you know, denying that behind the scenes. They never actually show them smoking weed. They just show them in a circle and they're kind of like, oh, and you're just supposed to think that they just like doing that. That has nothing to do with drugs. So you can't say that he was the hothead. He was sitting around in a circle head. We've spent hundreds of hours working together.

Danny takes his job seriously. He is kind, courteous, and hardworking. He treated everyone from the grips to the teamsters, to the actors, and to the caterers as equals. He showed up on time all the time and always pulled his weight. Okay, he's like, okay, I have to say. He doesn't seem like he's trying that hard here.

Like, everyone knows, everyone's mad at him and this probably is kind of the best he can do. Like, if you put a gun to Ashen Kuch's head and it's like, you know, you're Fred raped these people and he's gonna get 30 years in prison You have to do the best possible job to like, you know, grant leniency from the judge This kind of probably this would be the best he could do But maybe if I was him if I was Scientology and like, you know, work in the PR angle I'd be like look at how bad this was

He wasn't crying at all. Yeah I'd be like, look at how bad this was. He wasn't crying at all. Yeah. It does. Hey, my friend raped five people, but he was never late to that's the right show. Yeah. It sounds like they did a control replace in a letter of recommendation for someone to be manager of a fudruckers.

Yeah. Yeah, yeah, exactly. This isn't enough to like get somebody out of a fudruckers. Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly. This isn't like, this isn't enough to like get somebody out of a prison sentence. This isn't enough to like get somebody out of the halfway house. Yeah, this isn't enough to get somebody out of jury duty. Yeah, I mean, maybe this is like a, like a double agent situation. We're by writing a letter so annoying, he actually got an extra 10 years on his ends. No, the other really good one that goes, yeah, he has always treated people with decency, equality, and generosity.

After 9-11, Danny was a huge advocate for support of firefighters affected by the event, rallying his friends and co-workers to pitch in however they could. Danny had his daughter a year before I had mine. He said, he's at the standard of being a hands-on dad. But yeah, 9-11 affected him very personally as it did really affect all of us very personally So I'd like to I'd like to just get that on the record now Should I ever potentially be charged with the crime or facing imprisonment for anything? I just like the judge to know here and now before any crime has been committed. I was deeply affected by 9-11

My brother-in-law is in the FD and why well yeah one thing one thing he did do was he tried to convert all the firefighters to Scientology. Yeah. He, he, he, he, he, Scientology and Danny Masters said they, they had these detox centers in New York right after 9-11. Yeah. Firefighters would come in and they'd be like, no, no, like, don't take these six-year doctor prescribed you. Take these vitamins and let's get you on this OT meter.

And we'll take care of it. I would assume that most of those guys probably died of like the weird 9-11 illness, right? Yeah. Well, that may be true, but New York City had the clearest fire department in the country. And we're still proud of that to this day. Can't take that away. Look, so speaking of 9-11, to go back to 9-11 for a second, New York magazine has a, you know, we've, this someone we've been talking about recently, but New York magazine has a you know, we've this someone we've been talking about recently but New York magazine has put together You know, I'm not another sort of roundup of so what is Rudy Giuliani up to these days? And I think it's actually a perfect to dip into this on the anniversary of 9-11

Because you know, I think we talked about this like two episodes behind two episodes a couple episodes Bob go for a guide of fall that far in national esteem, like it is truly astounding. Because like, he's probably not even invited to any of these 9-11 things anymore. I mean, and if he is, the camera is not being focusing on him and he's not being asked to speak or anything. And honestly, I would say, well, you know, at least he's got the love and loyalty of, you know, 30% of the population, but I don't ever really get the sense that like, mega people really like Rudy. No. Like, yeah.

It really seems to rally to Rudy. He's not like a real media fixture op-ion being interviewed all the time, you know, like he's, I don't think his podcast is terribly popular. Mark Meadows and Peter Navarro get all the love from Mago World. Where's the love for Rudy? Rudy is like Trump's Memphis bleak, except like Jay-Z would pay Memphis bleak's legal fees. He wouldn't be like, here's a go fund, May.

Oh, man. But so in addition to getting sued for sexual harassment, and there's some other details in here. Like it says here, Giuliani often demanded, this is of the woman's doing him for sexual harassment julie on the often demanded that she work naked in a bikini or in short shorts with an american flag on them that he bought for her

and that he had her perform oral sex on him during business calls including when he was speaking to trump because it made him feel like bill clinton it's good to know that his vision of himself in office as he, you know, burrowed through American political institutions and his dream of himself as president was just Homer Simpson on the porch twirling the pistol on his finger while marching. The fucking through gonna bikini with a monicle. That's just it.

That was what he thought of. Why are you gonna be president Rudy? So I can do that. I'll do it.... rob the quickie mart i like that he bought her the pair of short shirts to the american flag print and very consider yeah uh... also uh... he is uh... what is he he's been raising money by a cameo uh... it's as here the the service that allows people to commission personalized videos from celebrities

this quickly generated new controversy when he recorded a video that appeared to endorse the case against his own legal client. Many other video appearances were personally embarrassing. Though there is a little chance to result in more legal trouble. In 2022, Giuliani accidentally posted video of himself promoting cameo in gigantic shorts. He also appeared on the masked singer performing bad to the bone. His unmasking prompted coast to go host Ken Jong to walk off the set and protest saying, that's what I can. Yeah, I'm done.

Oh, that was it. That's when you had your fill of the masked singer again. I still don't understand that concept of that show. They sing in the masks and then people guess who they are. Implifying that people should be able to recognize Rudy Giuliani's singing voice. I've broken thousand hearts before I met you. Break a thousand more, baby, before I am through. Yeah, yeah.

If somebody, if somebody I knew like was able to within 10 seconds identify like how we long by his Singing voice I would kill them I would call the police and be like I'm killing my friend and this is why and they feel like you literally kid you by hearing the voice You can essentially nail it down to man or woman and then you got to just guess It just doesn't seem like a very realistic the game show part of it during the voice, you can essentially nail it down to man or woman. And then you got to just guess. It just doesn't. I just like a very realistic, the game show part of it just doesn't make sense. You know, uh, from the first, any McCarthy about it, from the, from the,

from the, from the first few bars of trouble from the music man. I knew that that was former NFL defensive end Warren sap. Yeah, if you can, yeah, you, I mean, if you could do that, you're either like an incredibly like schizophrenic person who's like cobbled together clips of this person like doing karaoke or something, or like, I don't know, just the worst superpower ever, like the X-Men when they started running out of ideas. I, I also, I saw, I saw a couple good, like, pre like commercials for TV shows that are coming up now, like this is what the networks are doing to deal with the writer's strike.

I saw a commercial for a TV show, a game show hosted by David Spade, the concept of which is that contestants have to guess whether a product is real or fake. And it's just like all the hair-brained products that they pitch on, fucking Shark Tank, most of which I think are probably fake anyway. It's like they'll do those and they'll be like, oh, it's a suitcase that looks like a dog or something. And then you're supposed to guess whether the product is real or not. And then the other one, I saw, I was just, they're burning this one heavy during all the sports yesterday. A competition, like a competition based game show hosted by Josh Dumahel called Buddy Games. And you know, just like a movie that a mind of Jason would watch.

And it's just, yeah, it's like you just do like Cornhole and ping pong with your friends. This, you can't see it. He's good. These are only fun to do because they're by amateurs, they require minimal skill. That's what makes them fun and not like a rigorous test of the body and spirit, which is what like real sports are, which is why they're fun to watch. They're broadcasting pickleball on television. Oh yeah.

It's like, this is, standards have fallen in sports entertainment. You cannot deny it. I, God, this is a country that has killed millions of people in a really short period of time. Like, yeah. I would imagine if America knocked over your government and then you watch buddy games.

It's amazing. 9-11 doesn't happen every day. It's, I mean, we started doing it to ourselves just because nobody else would. This is demoralizing. You say that, but you won't be feeling that way after you buy a pair of $50 Rudy Giuliani sandals. Great products at reasonable prices use code Rudy for additional savings. And it's just a photo that just says new sandals, regular price, $80, but you can get these sort of slip flops for $50 use promo code Rudy. $50 for sandals. If you buy those sandals,

you should just have your entire accounts expropriated because you cannot be trusted with money. That thing's got to be five cents worth of Chinese plastic. And my favorite one of what Rudy's been up to is insisting that he doesn't have a drinking problem. It says Giuliani denying the courts that a drinking problem is to blame for the shift away from his America's mayor persona, and that he's talked to reporters while inebriated.

Quote, I don't think I've ever done an interview drunk. I mean, I drink normally. I like scotch. I drink scotch, he said. I'm not an alcoholic. I'm a functioning. I'd probably function more effectively than 90% of the population. I like that he started to say, I'm a functioning alcoholic and he just said,

I function better than probably 90% of the population. I function better when I've had a few. That's what he's saying. Yeah, exactly. But yeah, like, you know, it's like similar to Brett Kavanaugh saying, I like beer. I drink beer.

But he says I have a problem. He has a drinking solution. Yes, that's right. And one of the other things he was doing, shaving in an airport restaurant. There's Rudy Giuliani's personal grooming habits are already this stuff of legend, but he topped himself on August 22nd, 2021 when he was spotted shaving his face in the Delta One lounge at JFK airport. Traveler Nick Weiss shared footage on Instagram of the former mayor eating a bowl of lobster biscuits being on us, being served a plate of brownies, then pulling out an electric razor and shaving at the table using his tablet camera as a mirror.

Weiss said that what made the incident even more bizarre was that the lounge had a really nice bathroom. You just wanted to live that hobo life. Yeah. the incident even more bizarre was that the lounge had a really nice bathroom. You just wanted to live that hobo life. Yeah. Well, best of luck to Verde. I mean, this is, I mean, it's really like, this is his birthday, really. This is his day of special. It's true.

And I hope I hope he's having fun. I hope he's doing something fun. I hope he's treating himself to like a glass of scotch. Yeah, yeah, it's a couple. Yeah, as he prepares to be deposed under oath for the 10 hundredth time today. That's true. Get a little Dutch courage and go in there and tell them what for. Give him hell, Rudy.

Give him hell. Just like you did the 9-11 hijackers. I mean, he definitely did it to the 9-11 survivors. Okay. Next up, I have a story from the New Yorker about basically the like the daring new frontier is in education and it touches on a topic that we enjoy talking about. Virtual reality and the metaverse folks, that is the charter school of the future will be in virtual reality.

What you know, this is an incredible, there's some incredible stuff in this piece here. It just begins, it's 6 a.m. a little girl who looks to be about 10 years old hits the button on her alarm clock. She eats a bowl of cereal and brushes her teeth and hair before going to school. In class, she takes notes while her teacher, Mrs. Marty, gives a lesson. Then everyone puts on spacesuits and helmets and the class relocates to outer space. This is the vision for a new kind of education sold in a promotional video for Optima Academy Online, an all-virtual school that was launched in 2022. The little girl, like most of her classmates and teachers, spends a good part of her day in a Metacrest 2 headset,

a set of one-pound white goggles that extends in a single band across her eyes. She wears the headset on and off for about three hours, removing it to read a book, e to sandwich, and hot glue, some sort of tin foil art. Her classmates are scattered or are across different towns and her teachers live all over the country. In the video, the little girl doesn't have a single in-person interaction.

The virtual school is part of OptimaEd, a company in Florida, of course, founded by Erica Donalds, a 43-year-old conservative education activist. During the past school year, the Academy enrolled more than 170 full-time students out to the eighth grade from all over Florida. A number that OptimaEd will roughly double this fall. So basically, it's just, yeah, like, it's like a all-bet a quest, goggle, school thing, but the interesting thing here is that this is all being promoted by not just like charter school activists who want to destroy public education, but by like a specific kind of conservative education

activists who wants to like return to the classics, but do it in a virtual world. Do it in a video game. Cool. So you get to like shank Julius Caesar. Yeah. Is that a mini game? This is literally who I eat.

Yeah. Yeah, that sounds fun, honestly. Sounds better than Oregon fucking trail, which is what I have. Yeah. Hey, no, no slender about Oregon trail, please. That game was a little bit... No, but I mean, I'm just imagining Oregon trail, which is what I have. Yeah. Hey, no, no slender about Oregon trail, please. That game was, but I mean, I'm just imagining Oregon trail, you know, the eight bits, just the little musket balls just languidly going across, trying to get to the bison versus

like you're actually holding a 3D fucking black powder rifle and blowing away a thundering buffalo out. Come on, you can taste it. I want to feel what it's like to have dysentery. I want to feel that I want to shut out my virtual doo-doo ass. I just think the interesting thing here is like both the connection of Rhonda Santis, who is a expanded this program by making also students eligible for education vouchers funded that went from with money that would otherwise go

towards public school education. So yeah, you can get a voucher now in Florida. Just stick some virtual VR goggles on your head and send them to Optimus Ed, but it's gotta say I Feel kind of indicated here because when all this fucking metaverse bullshit first rolled out Everyone agreed this will never catch on. I'm sorry because it's unpleasant to no one wants to do it only like the most leading edge case freaks find anything appealing about this. And I said, I don't know. It's, yes, no one's gonna choose to do this,

but eventually there's gonna come a part where you are made to do it. And who the hell in the world can you make do something like go to the metaverse? Children. Yeah. There's the only people that you can make go to the metaors. And if you're their parent, homeschooling them or if you're some overworked public school teacher carrying out the module that like your local school district heads got a kickback to put into the classrooms, you're going to now be in there as a kid. And then maybe when you get older, you stay there

because it's all you know. But this is the way to make the metaverse an actual thing is start with the people who you can actually make go there no matter how much it sucks because they don't know no better. And you can tell them what to do. Yeah. I feel bad for kids the most in this because like, yeah, not only is it going to be foisted on them first, it's foisted on them with this ethos of like, oh, the metaverse, you love this shit, I bet. Yeah. Oh, you love computers? I bet you love graphics from 20 years ago on a game.

Yeah. I bet you hate legs. Yeah. I feel like, yeah, they get that, yeah, they're, like, feel like, I mean, I was thinking like, how is this going to work on kids when like they're like Felix, I mean, I was thinking like, how is this gonna work on kids when like they're used to these like immersive open world gaming experiences with like 1080p graphics? Yeah, it's, that's the most annoying thing about it, right? Is the metaversus like an old person's idea of how a game or any type of computerized experience could be immersive, right? Like the most immersive games aren't like something where you put a fucking

stupid helmet on and watch like a shitty like basically just stretch a steam deck across your head. It's like it immerses you in the same way that like honestly like good TV shows and movies do like you you connect on an emotional level. It isn't just like oh we're replacing your entire field of vision with just this thing. Like that's like that could maybe trick not even an ape like maybe a lesser monkey. It's just, it's so insulting. And like, yeah, especially like, yeah, kids who have already like experienced all these things,

it's really shitty. Speaking of insulting apes, Felix, I saw something recently about how Zeus around the country at their gorilla enclosures, like, you know, where there's like a clear, clear wall of glass, Zeus, like gorilla enclosures have to like put up notices now to not show the gorillas like videos on your phone of like TikTok and Instagram because they get,

like they, they, it upsets them or they can like, if you can rile them up and it's just like, it affects their brains in exactly the same way it affects ours because their brains are probably like 98% the same as ours. But like, I love that because I was just like we're torturing apes either it's Elon Musk putting microchips in their heads or we're showing them fucking shit on our phones. It's bad for us. We're just turning our brains into goop. But like don't show it to the eight don't just After you've been untainted from the stink of humanity after you should after you show them a phone video They start going around and being like if you see a banana with two brown spots on it

That means that you've been marked to be ape traffic Actually, I we introduced Twitter to the apes and they've given up bananas because we're not going to have them after their revolution. What's your job going to be after the revolution? I think mine is going to be flea picker. Sorry, back to you, Optima Ed though. I just want to read this next paragraph and just keep in mind what they're talking about is putting a meta quest headset on a seven-year-old. Optima ed builds its education as classical

with an emphasis on the intellectual traditions of Western civilization and the liberal arts. Younger students learn phonics and diagram sentences. Older ones read the great books and the Constitution. Teachers talk a lot about virtues such as courage and self-government. It's a very traditional back-to-basics education, Donald said on a podcast recently, but like they said, they're reading books and the Constitution. What, in a fucking, in a VR headset? Yeah, you roll it out like a big parchment. Yeah. God, that's, I already hated how they were like just forcing kids

to use tablets. I fucking hate tablets. No one under the age of 65 should use one. There's a, it's just such a, what an insult to the people who are, you know, losing their lives, mining the materials we use for micro processors. To make those garbage pieces of shit pointless. We have fucking, we have laptops that weigh like eight ounces. What are we doing with this? But tablets are way better than this. This is like, that is the worst possible way I could think of to read a book. That's a lot of work to attain.

Yeah, you retain the least information possible. Like, okay, you get the experience of reading a book. That's a book you were in a time. Yeah, you were in the least information possible. Like, okay, you get the experience of reading a book, but also like a painful audio visual experience. Also, like, why, I mean, I get why they're doing it now because we still expect kids to learn how to read in school. But who knows? Like, once you get a few generations of the cyber children, of the

meta children, you might realize, well, they don't actually have to need to learn to read. And it really is. It kind of clashes with everything else in the metaverse pedagogical wheelhouse to have all this, having to have to stop over these little symbols instead of just bum, bum rushing them with sensory overload. Because fucking print moves too slowly. No, they're just going to abolish it. And then it will work perfectly. Well, I mean, like, you know, it's also part of the agenda to a, not abolish that just public education, but I think, yeah, like I think there

is a movement of what to abolish just education as a concept. But keep that in mind. Next paragraph here, it says, uh, Donald's comes from the world of Florida school choice activism. She's well-known in Florida political circles A few of Donald's closest activist allies founded the group moms for liberty Which has become the leading conservative voice in the movement for parents rights and education and Donald serves on the group's advisory board She's also married to a congressman Byron Donalds a rising star in the Republican Party who is briefly a contender for Speaker of the House in 2023. The movement for school choice and parental rights sometimes dovetails at the classical

school movement, which has been experiencing a revival in America since the 1980s. Whereas the former often focuses on the shortcomings of public schools, the latter offers an alternate vision for education, a way of teaching students that calls back to the ancient wisdom and traditions of the Western world instead of instructing them using progressive pedagogy and frameworks. I hate progressive pedagogy and frameworks. Get it out of here. Yeah, but like, yeah, educating children in the way

and the ancient wisdom of the, ancient wisdom of the open world is what it's more like. But yeah, like just throw some, throw some fun. This is just a video game. What the fuck is going on here? We're gonna integrate this with the Prager You cartoon content and just have you interacting with the shitty looking cartoon versions of Robert E. Lee. Like, you see the other Prager You clip with Robert E. Lee and Lissy's S.

Yeah, it was like, oh, you were boy. We just boys. We got caught up on the run. Mix up. Yeah. Up, Shucks. Lee was a good man. We had fought together in the Mexican-American war,

but this time we were just caught on the opposite side of things. They also, like, I hated that one because they made Grant, who was like an alcoholic who, like, had 20 kids and 15 of them died. Like they just made him sound like a soy conservative. Like he has the same speech patterns as like Seth Dylan. Yeah, I mean that's the thing. These guys, they want it, they say they want to preserve history, but they actually are trying to destroy it and create this fucking Disney Land version of it that robbed of any meaning and flavor. I've noticed actually a lot of like sort of like neo Confederate accounts on Twitter now

will bring up Ulysses Grant's alcoholism as like he was a degenerate drunk compared to the man of pure virtue, Robert E. Lee. And I gotta say check Robert E. Lee. And I got to say, check the rings. Yeah. Yeah. Everybody's been off when John Jones and Daniel Korma in their rematch. Korma was prodding Jones for having been, I think the first UFC champion to ever test positive for cocaine

residue in a fight that he won. And he said, yeah, well, I beat your ass after a weekend of doing coke. Yeah. Same thing. Well, actually, let's talk about what's actually in the Optima Academy online. It says there are about 250 custom environments in which students and teachers can gather for lessons. These places do not exist in real life. They were built by Optima Ed's staff using virtual furniture, buildings, and natural elements. This is one of the things Optima Ed sells.

Independent schools, for example, can pay to have access to these custom built environments. According to Donalds, Jeb Bush, the former governor of Florida and an early school choice promoter, was wowed by his virtual school demo, asking with wonder, where is this? No where, Jeb, it's nowhere. So they've wowed Jeb Bush. This technology has blown the famous fucking socks off

of Jeb Bush. This being a classical virtual reality school, Optimus environments include settings in ancient Greece and Rome. Okay, I don't think we should be putting kids in an ancient Greek and Roman setting for school. No, I thought we were trying to... No, I thought we were trying to end that. We're trying to monitor the environment.

They have been trying to get that out of schools. Yeah. Today we're learning about Frotage. I was a motion capture actor for that. I had to do some terrible things. He plays a body thration. Okay, recently the head of the online academy, Dan Stervodant, and its academic dean Kim Abel took me on a tour of an early Roman outpost. The images are closer to an animated video game than to documentary footage.

We teleported past a Roman official's house decked out with red clay roof-tyling, up some stairs to an open patio of black and white checkered marble floors, surrounded by ionic columns and an iv covered railing. Here a teacher might spawn a set of bleachers for students to sit during a lecture on a subject such as history or Latin. The head of the virtual schools history department, Jonathan Olson has a PhD in American religious history and is responsible for verifying the historical fidelity of the ancient sites. Bleachers notwithstanding. Okay. Why would you give your kid this kind of education when you can just buy them the Assassin's Creed games, which provide an excellent education in all sorts of ancient historical environments.

Yeah, how many neck snapping is can you do in this bullshit? I think zero. Yeah, again, I mean, I hate pretty much every Assassin's Creed that came out really after the first Obama term, but they're more immersive than this bullshit. Like I'm struck by them using the term animated video game. What other type is there? Like yeah, that assures me that this is just top of the line, incredibly immersive audio visual technology. It's animated. Towards the end of the school year, I joined a sixth grade science class on a field trip to an Everest base camp.

The scene was elaborately staged. This doesn't sound like classical education. This is like, well, here's what Edmount Everest looks like if you were standing underneath. I mean, this is, they're not, we're the kids in a journal. It's just pure, it's just pure, it's pure, it's pure, it's pure, it's pure, it's pure, it's pure, it's pure, it's pure, it's pure, it's pure, it's pure, it's pure, it's pure, it's pure, it's pure, it's pure, it's pure, it's pure, it's pure, it's pure, it's pure, it's pure, it's pure, it's pure, it's pure, it's pure, it's pure, it's pure, it's pure, it's pure, it's pure, it's pure, it's pure, it's pure, it's pure, it's pure, it's pure, it's pure, it's pure, it's pure, it's pure, it's own, it's just, it's just pure spectacle, sensation, no context, so then nothing can make sense.

You can't like keep it in your head as anything, just it's these discrete experiences. And then it's like, it's good enough for you because nobody who's matters, kid, is gonna learn this way. Yeah, no, this is only for the invisible people's kids. This is like, this is like if they took what they did to Alex in Clockwork Origin, we're like,

it's a new learning experience. The orange, the orange, I thank you. It's a sin. It's a sin. Yeah. And it makes you fit to take things from one place to another. God, what a fucking, it's so grim.

How we teach the kids of our CVS employees, new drivers like here. You're like the backbone of this horrible shitty system that is near its apex of exploitation. But guess what? Your kids get a shitty tablet and now in onerous overheating helmet that last ever quest at them that you have to pay for. It's great. Timmy is doing wonderfully in class. Bad thing is that his invisible friend is Oscar Dirlwanger. We have great news. We've almost completely eroded the part of your son's frontal lobe that produces empathy. The teachers had set up a weather station equipment that a researcher might use such as a compass and a barometer. The kids struggled with the lesson. When a teacher asked them where air pressure would be greatest on the beach or at the top

of a mountain, they weren't certain how to answer. The session was chaotic. On the normal day, teachers might press a button and forcibly seat the students to prevent them from moving around during the Mrs. Christ. But since this is supposed to be an interactive meal trip, the kids are thinking to zoom around at will, which they did. One of them who had styled his avatar

with a helmet walked right through me. Roughly a dozen six graders are there, but it was hard to keep track of them with all the fidgeting. Okay. You know how, I mean, not to be too old-fashioned here, not to be too back in my day, but I'd say if you wanted to teach a group of six graders how to use a compass or a barometer, you would just give it, you'd show them a compass or a barometer. Not something that's fucking Mount Everest, Mount Everest, fucking side mission, which

is set up virtual weather equipment to prepare them for a life of being gig Sherpas for a DoorDash or whatever. Yeah. With the gemblish thing earlier reminded me that Neil Bush, my favorite Bush brother, Yes. He made, he made like a small fortune in selling like bullshit education software and like I remember using stuff like that when I was like in grade school like There you there was like math blasters. I'm sure people remember that but like Most crucially those things did teach you very basic like multiplication and addition

Yeah, And most importantly, it wasn't horribly uncomfortable and you didn't get scolded for acting like a nine or ten year old who's had a helmet forcibly placed on them that deadens out all their other senses. This is like, this is terrible. This makes me feel like fucking sad. Getting the virtual feel crate children. This is what it's like to be a vehicle calf. Yeah, this is the first one. I'm talking Pearl, Pearl jam. Do the evolution video remember?

Yeah, the fun. I'm going to go. Yikes. This is real. The wall style shit right here to forcibly seat the kids. Oh, Jesus. style shit right here to forcibly seat the kids. Jesus fucking Christ like just kill yourself. Not if you're the kids if you made this fuck you. I hope you fucking die. A little bit more about the virtual assent of Everest and says here in the next activity we attempted to scale the Kumbu ice fall which in real life is a deadly

stretch on one route up Everest. The format was a cross between a quiz show and a video game. Using the teleport function on our handheld controllers, we moved along the line of chairs set up along the icefall, occasionally passing a floating note card with a review question. There was also a physical rule put in place. No one could move the controller in their left hand, otherwise they'd fall from the mountain and force the whole group back to base camp

where we'd have to start all over again. At first, the students discussed the various dangers of the mountain. One suggested that we should all be quiet to prevent an avalanche, then started screaming to demonstrate what not to do. A teacher quickly muted them. Ha ha ha ha.

God bless kids, kids that can do the kids. Yeah. That is the only bright spot in this thing that the kids are fucking this thing up every chance they get, which they should do. They absolutely should. Oh my God, yes. The fucking controller.

Anyone, anyone who is subjected to this deserves the most unruly classroom possible. But it's like, so it's, pitch is this amazing thing because it's interactive. Yet anytime anyone interacts with it, it just freaks and has a fucking restart because it's made as shoddly as possible. Wow, it's almost like you could just show them

a fucking documentary if you were being that late. It's almost like that's a better way of teaching. Just slap, open get, get the TV, bring the TV into the class. Yeah. That is way less traumatic and mind-warping than this shit. Yeah. Like I honestly, ever, so from what it sounds like anytime that like a kid moves at all,

like puts any input in, they probably bill it as like, oh no, this is the same as like keeping order in a classroom. You have to like, but I think I actually think that it's so shittily made that it can't handle multiple inputs and it has to, it doesn't have like the video memory to handle that. So it has to reboot every time that it gets more than like one thing put it. Well, uh, uh, these, you know, these discipline problems with kids, uh, virtually moving and pressing the teleporter button when they've been frozen by the teleport controller, uh, these disciplinary issues will soon fall away when

optimum ad includes, like sort of like a, a dog collar that you can attach to the meda question, but you know deliver as a small jolt, just the mild jolt to the reticence student. Just finishing up about the expedition up Everest, as the exercise got underway, the kids grew increasingly frustrated. My teleports broken, one of them shouted, another one couldn't find the chair

in the line up the mountain. People must have been using their left hand controllers because the whole group kept falling and getting to reset at the line of the mountain. People must have been using their left-hand controllers because the whole group kept falling and getting to reset at the beginning of the activity. Every time a pre-recorded message from one of the teachers would say, oh man, well hopefully we won't make that mistake again. Several kids spent ahead of the rest of the group. It wasn't clear who was actually looking at the review questions. Just last paragraph I want to read here. Afterward, when I asked Sturd event about what had happened on the mountain, he described it as an opportunity for virtue development.

There's a virtue in serving your peers well by not being a distraction, Sturd event said, there's a virtue in having self discipline and being able to control your emotions. Those are the follow up conversations that we will have with the students. There's a lot of it would be virtuous if you went into your garage right now and just fucking gunned your car and neutral. If you got to do a bathtub and opened your wrist, you piece of shit, you fucking child torture profiteer. It really is evil. It really is.

Until you're self now. And like, and like all this, like, and you know, by the way, these people, they have, they have, they have contracts so they have like deals in place with Hillsdale, the sort of like evangelical Harvard. What a shock. All the schools where it just, all the administration gets off on like

disciplining and punishing children as much as possible. They love this shit. Were these, these were the same people that like during COVID were like, this is like horrible for kids that they're being put in the mask on them. Oh my God. Putting goggles on them. That's normal. Like to to a point, it's like, I am sympathetic to a lot of that because like

COVID was really bad for young people. Like, yeah, awful. Both like the anxiety and misery of COVID itself, but also like the isolation. Young people and losing like a year or two years of education as well. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, young people gave up a lot and it was really sad, but this is like, well, like they might as well just stay home. Like, this is the same thing.

You're taking all the socialized aspects away from learning. This is horrible. Like I think a Zoom school is like terrible. This is worse. This is way worse. This is a million times worse. And like I think they really strikes me about all this is like despite it's lofty aspirations and like association

with like supposedly the supposed institutions of learning like Hillsdale. And this whole agenda of classical education, let's say that there is some virtual lesson plan, what do you get to fall off Mount Everest 50 times and look at little pop up questions or whatever. And then when confronted with the guy, the stupid guy who should probably end his life, what's his name, stirred event. He says, okay, like, rather than any,

imparting any lessons about Mount Everest, like the country it's located in, how it call it is, like when it was forum, you know, like, I don't know, like anything of cultural, scientific, or political interest about the history of Mount Everest, it's just like, oh no, actually the lesson was about virtue building, like the virtue of helping others and not being annoying. Yeah, shutting your fucking mouth.

I mean, like, what a fucking tell that is, too, because it's right. Of course, there's nothing. There's nothing like anyone who's like ever sold, like, you know, education software, like we talked about, at least have like a pitch where it's like, Oh, oh well if you do it in this If you gamified in this way it makes people competitive about like learning facts or like multiplication tables or anything like that There's like a pitch that centered on the act of learning itself But because this is strictly a tool of a Miseration and discipline through sensory deprivation

of a miseration and discipline through sensory deprivation. He's like, no, this is about learning to keep your fucking head down and prepare for the future of DoorDash. And the thing is, I remember being in sixth grade, theoretically, some sort of TV documentary or computer game virtual trip to Mount Everest would be very fascinating to me as a sixth grader, I don't even imagine many other sixth graders because kids are fascinated with things that are big and like there's interesting things you can teach kids. According to Stardovand, he says here there's a virtue in having self discipline and being able to control your emotions. And then he says, uh, struggle is okay. Distraction is not. If there are ways in which the

technology gets in the way way we'll correct those things usually you should struggle with a sword jamb did your own stomach and then maybe the distraction can be ended by a friend be heading you after 30 seconds of bleeding you need to commit floor to sepico now well the last line i'll read from the article is it says it optimist virtual school rylan has thrived his mom said his parents work from home and they like coming from around especially because rylan used to be so anxious about the school day he doesn't have to worry about a school shooter coming in hillside he doesn't even have to worry about the drills anymore

boy oh boy we've really got you. I'll be there man. Yeah. It's just too. Shay. Yeah. Oh, I detect. I detect the vile Phantom Menace, the veiled hand of Zuckerberg behind this entire goddamn thing. Because we look at him, epically fakes planting with Meta and realizing, okay, nobody is going to choose to do this. Well, what about those people who can't choose to do anything? And if I'm not mistaken, Zuck is a huge school choice guy with a huge funding network within school choice networks. So how hard would it have been for him to stand up? A couple of independent organizations moving towards this new results-based techno-learning concept.

Oh, it just so happens to use the Meta platform. And you get it in the schools. Yeah. And you get it in the schools by bribing the school districts is basically what they do. And then it becomes derogor at a whole generation gets inculcated and brainwashed into that way of living. And of course, this is a moment when we have this Titanic battle over brainwashing children about ideological capture in schools. And meanwhile, you have a literal war on like,

what it is to be a human being waged on children. The thing you're saying you're scared of, but because it doesn't trip any fucking culture war triggers, it doesn't hit any trip wires, then it just is invisible. And then it's just going to happen. And you're going to have kids, the kids who don't really count, because of course, the voters and the policymakers, none of their kids are going to go through this. That's assumed. This is for somebody else's kids. And there's going to be two different modules, depending on which party holds your state government. You're gonna have the 1619 woke module

and you're gonna have the 1776 base module and then you get to just not learn anything from any of it. And just really just learn how to be a literal drone. Yeah, and we've talked about like the war on public education and obviously like that's a huge part of what's going on here. But as I said before, it's like, there is a war on the concept of education. And it's like under the guise of whether it's this like

classical, wink, wink, really virtual education, or I don't know, like decolonizing the curriculum or whatever, whatever shit that is. It's just a way to get to deliver this new way of being. Onto people. To deliver like, yeah, like, to deliver things to kids that are like under the guise of education that are like, it just stores your mind and you will live.

And the pitch and the pitch is, no, they have to learn the right things. They have to learn the right values or else we're going to lose the culture war, but they're not learning any of that. They're not learning anything. They're just learning to yes, be obedient and to not recognize human connection. If they fucking had any, Yeah. Don't move. Don't move the left controller. Matt, don't move the left controller.

Matt, you're going to reset. You're going to reset us. You're going to take it. You're going to take us out of Gettysburg. Hello, friends. It's Monday, September 11th. This is your choppo coming out. You know, I hope everyone is having a wonderful 9 11.

Um, and you know, just dancing, dancing, dancing, dancing, that's what people do on 9-11. And it's what's trending on Twitter right now. I, yeah, I, we have to like make this completely illegal within like three years. Or actually, but literally, if she had time, honestly, it's go time with this. If you can't beat them, join them. And I think we need to start our own Prager you and just start doing our own, like,

you know, your virtual professor Matt Christmas, taking you around the Antietam battlefield. I think that would be great for kids. We have fun to the sunken road. Yeah, you could tell them about all the people who died there. Yeah, the wheat. Yeah, Burn Burn sides bridge. If

we're just like because like this stuff is in education, I would just I would like to do a class where I teach the events of Elden Ring, like the it's real history. It doesn't actually matter. It doesn't matter. Yeah. The middle ages happened or if this happened. Yeah. Yeah. It's just a fun story either way. I met, according to virtual professor Gary Casper of the Middle Ages didn't happen. Check out Elden Ring. Checkmate.

Yes. Rome fell 20 years ago. I honestly, I feel like, I think a virtual class in with like, you know, a series of lectures that you gave, explaining like the entire lore of Elden Ring is better. Like they're not reading books in school anymore. That'd be better than most English lit classes

that they're teaching these days. That's got story, characters, themes, tropes. Yeah, they're like better morals in Elden Ring than there are in any of this child torture device as it exists, certainly. this child torture device as it exists. Well, best of luck to you, Optima, and the proprietors of which we should say names in a short meeting. Yeah.

If the, um, what was the guy's name again? Uh, start event, start event. Start event. Uh, if yours gets frantic and live in start event's neighborhood, please hear these numbers 17, 18, 19, 35, 7, 7, 17, 18, gray, 49, 70, 70, 108, 108, 9, 0, 0, black. Do what those numbers tell you. I mean, 200 and 8th in a row.

I'm fine. I know what that means. Yeah, yeah, I know. Yeah, we should got to do. We do not endorse any. We did it. Yeah. Just getting these. It was all a joke. If you're a schizophrenic, please do not take this seriously. Seek help. Go leave Florida. Get the fuck out of there. Leave. Not good for you. Mm we go today, I just have a quick plug. It is for my boy Carl Stevens and Russell Goldman. He is a drawn a graphic novel called Mother Nature that is based on a screenplay by horror legend Jamie Lee Curtis, Hollywood royalty. So I'll just like to

have my opinion on funny books means anything to you, be it Justice Warriors or or other other books I pitched on this show. I would just like to give a shout out to my friend Carl Stevens, new book Mother Nature that he did in collaboration with Russell Goldman and Jamie Lee Curtis. I will say about Carl just just just Google Carl Stevens. I'll include a link to the book, but he's an amazing artist, and I did just commission him to do a portrait of my dearly departed Marty, which beautifully captures my beloved cat.

So just a plug here for Mother Nature by Jamie Lee Curtis, Russell Goldman, and Carl Stevens. Check it out if you like graphic novels. And that is all for me for today's show. Till next time gentlemen, bye bye. Bye bye. Oh, my sense of the opportunity. Let you pass us in,

let's the re-adjuvation. We're all in the end. You pass us in, we're all in the end. We're in the end. You pass us in, we're all in the end. Oh, my cross guess, I want to be a good person

I want to be a good person I want to be a good person I want to be a good person