Chapo Trap House - 790 - Advice for Dark Psychologies feat. Hesse Deni (12/12/23)

Episode Date: December 13, 2023

After a last minute guest cancelation leaves Will in a tight spot, Hesse Deni from Seeking Derangements and Movie Mindset comes off the bench to field another slew of questions sourced from advice columns. Q's include: What to do when your mom spends too much money on premium pornography? What if your child is in school with a dark psychopath? How to defend your home from the tooth fairy and much more. Subscribe to Seeking Derangements https://www.patreon.com/seekingderangements/posts Submit Questions to the Seeking Derangements help line at 332 203 8247

Music All right, everybody. Hello greetings. It's Tuesday, December 12th, and this is your chop-o. Just a brief note on programming before we start today's show. One, I'd like to just know, I apologize that the episode is coming in a day late, but if you'll just allow me a moment to explain, we scheduled recording for today to use day December 12th to accommodate the schedule of, you know, sort of a well-known comedian. He's got a new Netflix special coming out and we really like, you know, we were going to record earlier in the day for him. I don't want to, I don't want to, you know, say any names or anything, but yeah, his new Netflix special came out. And then he contacted me this morning to cancel on today's appearance.

So, you know, as a result, like, look, I mean, he's got an ex-fix special coming out and he did say that he forgot that he had scheduled to do a fundraiser for the ADL this afternoon. So he can't be on today's show. I mean, again, I'm not going to say any names. I'm going to say any names. We're going to do some advice column questions today, but he wants to let you all know that he has agreed to come back at a future date and do a fundraiser for Hamas on our show. So another note of programming here. I've got no Chris backing me up on the ones in Tuesday.

I've got no Felix due to said scheduling conflicts caused by Mr. Tudan Big for Chappo. So what am I gonna do? Where do I turn to? Well, there's one person who will never let me down and really my loss is your listeners, all of you, your gain. Joining me today to go through the world of advice and dispensing it, taking it, it's Hesitani from Seeking to Rangements and Movie Mindset.

Hesitani, welcome back. Oh, thank you. Oh my gosh, it's my pleasure. Hesitani, it's great to have friends who support you, friends who are there for you. Yes. I'm sorry the math, right? Canceled on you. Well, you know, I gave him my chin and this is how we fucking, I gave him my chin and this is how he repays me, I woke up in the hospital and said where is will.

And the doctor said who do you think gave you that chance. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, no, I mean, I wonder under anesthesia and like it was like the twilight zone episode where I look like Matt Reif, but everyone else is normal. Yeah. It's so funny that he did like a reverse beauty in the beast where he got, he got handsome and then became like a horrible person because of it. Well, as I mentioned, like, you know, so we have sourced a wide variety of advice questions today written into a variety of different major advice columns. And now on a, I'm seeking to arrange them. I know, I know, I know you guys sometimes dispense advice.

So I'm hoping that you could join me on this journey through some some advice questions and maybe you know, help some people out today. Yes, I'll do my best on seeking arrangements the questions are calling questions that our viewers call in with. So a lot of them are like, should I become trans? So I'll try to apply the queer knowledge to these questions. You will apply the derangements method to these questions. Yes, the derangements method. You know, yeah, I have to say this first advice column

question, which comes courtesy of the New York Times ethicist column. I gotta say, I don't think it would be too out of place on seeking derangements. The question begins as this, the headline is, my 70 year old mother spends too much money on porn. What should I say? I have it. I have it. I have it.

I have it. It's an easy one. The letter of the letter of E is. The letter of E is. I have it. The letter of E is. The letter of E is herity answer that I'm using. My mother, who was in her early 70s and was widowed about a year ago, has been struggling to adjust to life without her husband. As her only child, I have also been struggling to find ways to be helpful.

Finances have been a particular challenge for her. One concern is the cost of her cable and streaming subscriptions. Recently she has added subscriptions for four separate premium pornography channels, adding $160 per month to her already-exorbitant cable bill. Although my mother is an avid internet user, she evidently doesn't understand that there's ample free pornography available online. Should I discuss this issue with her? I'm a gas-the-amount money. She's spending unnecessarily on porn But I'm incredibly uncomfortable with the prospect of having a conversation about it and a number of questions here

She says she's recently withered and like now he now the the the child is helping his mother out with finances Mm-hmm I'm wondering like recently with out like do these streaming subscription charges just show up or are these just be like Is this the husband's accounts? Well my immediate first thought is this guy this husband must have been dicking her down Like ten times a day if she's like having to fill this This gap in her life, so so severely She needs several hundred dollars worth of and I like the inclusion of premium pornography sites. Yeah, this isn't just some cast in couch,

you know, fresh off the bus from Oklahoma style pornography. This is premium pornography. This isn't check hunters, this is Luxembourg hunters. Oh my god. And I need to know, this is to the New York Times ethicist, Colin. I gotta say I'm a little disturbed by the unethical sort of implication here that the son is encouraging his mother to pirate or essentially steal, quote unquote, free pornography. Yeah, you wouldn't steal a car.

You wouldn't, you know, I do have an idea here. Okay. My idea is that you hire a male stripper, one of those ones who dress as like a police officer and they come to the door and they say, hello, ma'am, you, we've received reports of too much paid porn activity. And then he rips off his clothes and says, let me show you really quickly how to use Google images and the porn hub to like look stuff up. Yeah, mom, here's how you use Google image search to find

Hunky Fireman. Yeah. No, that's not hard for her at this point. I'm curious what type of porn she's watching is my question. Well, I mean, that's something that should be brought up in this conversation. Yeah. But I think your initial reaction to this question was like, you know, I'm just trying to put myself in

The Sun's in question position and I would probably just Rather wait for my parent to die than ever talk to them about their pornography viewing. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I think that's probably I mean It is it is funny to picture that like the Bills there's like something for like D&D mattress man four times. Because they do like a hidden name and the sun knows what it is because the sun is also subscribed to the same exact porn site. I mean like, people say that like it's tough to find common interests between generations. Yes.

But you're seeing pornography. The new Lisa and video. She's got plucked that one. She's got got by lover. Speaking of Jack and off, have you seen the latest? Okay, first of all, my favorite thing about the current era of Twitter is the ads that they're running. And I'm wondering if you've seen the jack-off joggers.

Who's that targeted at? Well, I actually have the product open on my computer right now. It's a holiday season. I got some shopping to do. And the product description here, and the shout out to my friend Sean for, for, for, it's cluing me into this one. But the Jack and joggers are, you know, on sale right now for $80 US. The product description reads, at first glance, J. O. Pants seemed like normal, an assuming pants, a regular Joe would wear.

However, these pants are not ordinary pants. These are jack-off pants. An extra long invisible zipper opens up the crotch area for easy access to your genitals. Jack and joggers are cozy, comfortable joggers with a simple, timeless design made with masturbation in mind. Stay covered in warm while pleasuring yourself. No need to turn the heater up and waste electricity to fat naked. Quickly conceal your junk if someone walks in unexpectedly. Never get caught with your pants down again. And the only conceivable, like the target demographic for this would be like,

fashers, just like, he's zip up the joggers before the woman on the bus notices what you're doing. Yeah, or like re Antarctic researchers. It's really cold. See like copy like that, you can't write that with AI. You need to human touch for something like that.

I like the Antarctic researcher one because it was just like, yeah, don't take off your survival suit, DeFap. You'll freeze to death. Yeah. Because I was like, how fucking, yeah, I just don't know, I guess it's the winter, heating is expensive.

But he was getting fully nude to check. Oh, I don't know. It's a bit, it's a funny image of someone who's like, there's gotta be another way. One of those con air commercials. And do you actually think of the other Twitter ad for the, like, it's a device to extract sperm from a spent condom to pregnant yourself against the will of your partner? I did see, I briefly saw that. I saw like a little bit of the animation that it showed to demonstrate it.

I saw like one second of it and I was like, I have to keep scrolling. I can't. I don't want to watch that. Well, I believe it or not, this is actually not illegal, but it is unethical. So, just an unethical. Just send that one into the New York Times. I got a great one yesterday for bisexual.org. I got an after bisexual.org. What are they doing?

What is this organization doing? Is it just promoting bisexual awareness? I think, well, I went on the page and it was like, oh, there's a list of bisexual fictional characters. There's a list of famous bisexuals. Oh, one of them was Malcolm X. Yeah, it's Malcolm X. You got the marquee desod.

I think, yeah, like John Maynard Keens. Oh, like, a bunch of, you know, during a depression, you can hire one of the genders to fill a hole and then hire the other gender to fuck whatever one you want. Yes, absolutely. That's Keene's Ian. Well, that's, by the way, what was the thing you posted the other day

that was like how to confuse people with dark psychology? Oh, that was a TikTok, I saw. I keep getting these TikToks about dark psychology. Oh, that was a TikTok, I saw. I keep getting these TikToks about dark psychology. Well, I mean, check your interests. That's the algorithm only shows you what's inside of you. My favorite, it seemed like a lot of them were about like, if you're getting yelled at by your parents, how you can get them to stop.

I'm like, it's like, to get someone to stop being mad at you, ask them if they're having a bad day. It's like what? To make someone uncomfortable stare at their forehead while you talk to them. Ooh, that's a good one. Why would you want to make someone uncomfortable when you're talking to them?

Well, that also reminds me of, sorry to go off on yet another tangent, but I Was exploring right at one time and I found this Locked Reddit called dark triad women and I to join you very rare Yeah, yeah, I was I was like, oh, I kind of want to join this but to join you have to send naked pictures of yourself To the woman who owns it. That is dark psychology.

That is H. West, the genius running that subreddit. It's like, yeah, I'm going to send naked pictures of myself to this person who's running a discord for psychopaths. Sounds like a great idea. Yeah. I'm going to send this to the zodiac killer fan for him. Yes. Okay, this next question, this next question from the ethicist. A headline, my dead relative may have been a racist gangster. How can I help his kids? The letter reads, recently a relative from a distant state was shot and killed and what the authorities believe was a gang-related dispute, leaving behind a spouse and young children

in the aftermath. Friends and relatives of the family used to go fund me campaign to help with the expenses. Photos have circulated on social media before and since that show my relative and their spouse and friends wearing clothes with the insignia of a gang which is well known. Over the years, according to the FBI and news reports, the gang has been tied to murders, shootings, Nazi symbolism, illegal drug trafficking and running an escort service, post by my relative spouse suggest that they are proud to be associated with the gang. I cannot support illegal and immoral behaviors that are antithetical to my beliefs,

and yet I do not want to walk away. I would like to help the children who I believe are at grave risk for harm and who immediately need support. How might I support the young children when their parent may be embedded in a lifestyle that ultimately proves harmful to their well-well being? First of all, my condolences on what happened to your relative, by the way.

Yes, I don't know what to do. I don't know what to do. When I was reading this question, I was like, I was trying to piece together in my head which illegal criminal gang that they were talking about because of the Aryan Brotherhood, right? Well, not see symbolism, but then you know, but, not many people who are, I don't know, haven't been spent a long time with their life in prison or like really like, supporting, you know,

was it the for leave clover? Or it's like sort of a more covert organization. I'm thinking like the proud display of regalia and symbols associated with, you know, drug trafficking and some light Nazi paraphernalia, it's gotta be the Hells Angels, right? Or like some sort of motorcycle gang, a mess of me. But I would just, I like the idea that like,

this is like a distant relative, the person sees the go fund me and someone has like a biker cut on and they Google like Hells Angels and just read their history of like being an outlaw biker gang and they're like, oh no, I don't support this. No, thank you. It really, my question is, had they ever met this relative before? It would be kind of hard. If someone's in the hell's angels, you can kind of tell. It seems like it's not, you know, a difficult, you know, they wear that jacket everywhere, that cool jacket, they write a motorcycle. And the thing is, the jackets are very cool. They're cool.

And so I guess like, I would caution the letter writer to just maybe like investigate a little further, because there's a lot of people who associate with the costume with being a biker that are not actually in the sons of anarchy, you know, they're sort of like the sturgis, you know, annual crowd where they like dentists to truck in their Harley from like, you know, out of state. And then, you know, like, hang out for a week playing, playing biker gang guy. One time my friends and I were in Vermont, and we saw a huge biker gang of just butch lesbians, just hauling down the road and like the whole

single style jacket. So you're like, wow, I want to get, if I wanted to get hate crime by any old man. If I'm buying bathtub cranks from those gal. Yes, absolutely. Just some shaken bake meth and like a non-difficult record. I don't know, I guess it's like a, this is named with hell done this, but I just like the idea that they may be embroiled

in a lifestyle that's harmful to their well-being. I would just say like, you didn't know this relative was a biker or in a criminal organization, so you probably don't know that well enough to donate to the funeral. So just, you know, take a load off, who cares? Yeah, I think it's probably,

it's probably those kids are gone. Those kids are, if this is true and the mom is posting like, we're proud to be, you know, part of the Hell's Angels, we love it, we love it. It's, there's really not much you can do. Like, I've never seen Sons of Anarchy, but I think, I imagine that I'm sure someone on that show has kids, and I'm sure they don't tell you. Well, I have to actually, I mean, like, having seen soons of anarchy, I can tell you what's going to happen to these kids.

Okay. And that is that what's going to happen, unfortunately, is that IRA connected arms traffickers will kidnap them and take them to Ireland. And then the whole third season will be derailed by this fucking ridiculous trip to Ireland where they take their motorcycle, so they double in and drive around and get back to Texas baby from the IRS. How do they get the motorcycle?

I'm a cargo plane. In a cargo plane. Okay, okay. So I would say to this letter writer, try to protect them from the Irish as best you can. I don't know what awards them off. Maybe garlic. I might be thinking of vampires, but mirrors, put a bunch of mirrors around the house.

Oh, do-wool. I would just put o-dewels everywhere. You know what? Actually, here's a sincere reply. In lieu of sending money to help with the funeral, send a copy of Hunter S. Thompson's groundbreaking work of investigative journalism, Hell's Angels, which is a book that does a great deal to demystify

the outlaw, micro mythology of the Hell's Angels and portray them as the nasty gering of sociopathic rapists that they really are. Yes, reading. Reading can save the day here. Okay. sociopathic rapists that they really are. Yes, reading. A reading can save the day here. Okay. This is the next question from the ethicist.

A headline, our summer intern brags about his illegal hobby. Should I tell HR? Well, I'm going to just stop you right there and say no. Yeah. I don't know if there's very few hobbies that this could be that you should tell HR. Well, the hobby will be revealed in the letter. The letter is as follows. Our professional services firm has an intern for the summer who by all accounts seems

to be producing good work. He arrives early, stays late if needed and shows that he is truly interested in what we provide our clients. This person is interested in a full-time role at the firm. I was recently having a casual conversation with him and he mentioned his hobby of fixing up cars and then racing them on public roads. He boasted that he frequently reaches top speeds of over 130 miles an hour, but he claimed that this driving is safe because they do it only when a highway is empty.

If it became known in our firm that he broke speeding laws in this manner, I suspect his chances of getting a full-time offer would be seriously impacted. Like most firms, we value our reputation. If you got caught speeding at that rate, it could be reasonably expected to end up in the news. I was struggling with what to do. Should I let human resources know about this behavior so that we take it into account when deciding whether to make an employment offer? Should I keep quiet and hope for the best and letting him be evaluated only on the basis of his work at our firm?

Should I approach him and tell him that he is risking his life and possibly the lives of others and Suggest that if he wants to keep racing he should do it unclosed to racetracks. Okay, so This is a lot going on here. It's a lot going on here. I'm just saying to this Financial Services firm or whatever client-based service is, if you want to fire Bruce Springsteen and knock him in the whole criminal, the summer's here and the time is right to go racing in the streets.

Yes. The, what I'm picturing is this guy, like who looks like, you know, Dwight Shrewd being at the water cooler, like, so like, what are you getting up to this weekend? And Danny Zuko, saying, like, you know, racing for pink slips, you know what I mean? No, this is like a coolest intern of all time. Should you tell HR, yeah, about like an upcoming promotion, maybe tell this kid in charge of the company, tell HR that you're a loser nerd.

I think what you should do is go to one of these races yourself, sit in the passenger seat and just get the rush. Because I think what you're afraid of, what you're really afraid of is, is that you wish you were, you were this man and you're afraid of what you're really afraid of is that you wish you were you were this man and you're jealous of him in his daredevil ways. Like I- Okay, she's gonna show up to the race like hoping to get covert footage that she can send to HR. And then what does she find?

The head of HR is like one of the chicks in the past in various movies who like drops of bandana before they It's every single other person that the company is in on the race track except for them So, yeah, this is an easy one. Just stop stitching stop stitching. Yeah, that snitches get stitches Yeah, that's that that's a very good ethical principle to hold to yes, all right Moving on, I would like to now switch to, yeah, we're now we're now going to move over to slate.com, which is really the the meat and potatoes of my obsession with advice

columns. And I said, this question comes courtesy of the care and feeding advice column, which is all about families and child rearing. So I don't have kids, but I will do my best to offer some good advice to this person. So the letter begins as such, dear care and feeding. My daughter, Suzanne, has recently started sixth grade. For the first week or so, she was excited to be starting middle school, but that quickly faded. And now she doesn't want to go at all. Most of it is anxiety about dealing with one of her new classmates, Peter.

Peter hasn't done anything to directly harass her, but he seems to just be a weird disturbing and possibly disturbed child. I actually did hear about him from the first day as everyone was supposed to introduce themselves to the class and say something short about themselves. Peter's speech apparently was, quote, I am the one who filates the giver and you had all better remember that. What the fuck? I guess I can't.

Okay. I am the one who filates the giver and you had all better remember that. I'm trying to like in my head, I'm rotating shapes in my head to figure out. And all I could think about is that this kid wants to suck off that kindly old man from that book. Everyone read as a kid.

That's exactly what I'm fixing. You were like, I keep the memories. The world going from black and white to color. The second month. Well, this question doesn't end there. It keeps going. He will frequently shout out in the middle of class pertaining to his interest, which mainly seem to be necrophilia, cannibalism, and beastiality. This is the sixth grade. I suppose that's supposed to use susan is understandably upset and having to endure this day in and out i called her home room teacher and voice my concerns about peter

the response i got was not encouraging after some back and forth on the phone i got told that this is not the first complaint she's had about peter but that the school policy that kids like him and you can hear the air quote had to be mainstreamed now and that she said should try not to get him should try not to let him get to her. I don't know what to do at this point I can't get her class changed and I can't seem to get the teacher to do anything about this problem child Should I move and try to get a different and into a different school district escalate to someone if so, who? The situation has only lasted a few months in this audience, rambling. I can't make my daughter go through this for years. I don't, that is a lot going on. Yeah. I was expecting something like

funny, weird that he was going to say for the speech, but that's just very scary. That's, you should call CPS is what you should do, honestly, because this kid is probably getting abused or something. Yeah, this is disturbing. When she called the teacher and she was like, kids like those need to be coat mainstreams now. That's very strange. What type of kids you're talking about? Like, aspiring serial killers?

Is this what wokeness has done to our school? It'd be funny if she meant like Polish kids or something. Yeah, it's just her. I would say the like, I mean, I mean, you know, classroom, classroom bullying is always tough, but I would say to Susan, you know, like, you got to give it back as good as you get it. So like just start saying, you know, you're, he said,

he say, you know, he brings necrophilia to the fight. You say, I don So like just start saying, you know, you're, he said, he say, you know, he brings neck refilia to the fight. You say, I don't believe in the Holocaust, you know, just keep escalating to say something even more appalling than what then I'm the one who filates the giver, say, I give Cunnelling is to enders game or something, you know, but yeah, you got, you got to stand up to bullies. Yeah, you got to, if I would say just move, you got to cut your losses, you got to move. I would say contact the FBI's mind hunter's division.

This kid needs to be mind hunted to a firm and it's great. This kid's parents are Henry Lee Lucas and artists too, or I think, the only explanation I can think of. Yeah, that's a tough one, but yeah, move or contact the FBI is what I'm saying. Okay, next care and feeding question. This is a really good headline. The headline for this question is,

my brother has developed an absurd rule about magic at his house. Let's folks go. This is about stopping me from playing the card game. This guy's got another thing coming. That chance. Wait till I break out my red deck, Saka. Alright, so fear-carren feeding.

My brother, Steve, is a very practical man. He's a good father, but he's not very sentimental, and I would never expect him to do things like Elfana shelf hijinks or sprinkling fairy dust when the tooth fairy comes. However, I wasn't prepared for just how practical he is and how it would affect my own parent him. He has the oldest child in our family, nine-year-old Levi. My oldest is six.

We saw Levi a few months ago after he just lost the tooth. I asked him if the tooth fairy came, and he told me that his dad says no fairies or any other magical creatures are allowed in the house. Pause. Pause. That his dad just bought his tooth from him. I thought this was sad. I asked Levi about how he felt about it and he shrugged and he said it was weird for someone to come in the middle of the night and take his teeth and leave him money and that he preferred to sell his teeth to his dad. I mean, there's a 1,000% chance that this is like a libertarian household. Yes, absolutely, absolutely.

We don't believe in nonsense like the tooth fairy. We believe in the free market, and his dad might be Gary Johnson. You can sell your children's teeth on a buyer's market. Yeah, we need an open market. We need to replace all fair mystical figures with free markets, and that will solve a lot of problems in our world. So, when I asked Steve about this, he said the ban on magical creatures was something he thought was funny, silly in a good way,

and apparently it doesn't stop with the tooth fairy. Any presence from Santa or baskets from the Easter bunny are left on the front porch, and Levi and his younger siblings make a big deal out of putting things in front of the door or at the bottom of the fireplace so the gift-gerving creatures can't get in. But like, okay. So he's saying like, no magic in the house, but like, this is weird because it's not like

he's saying that the tooth fairy and Santa Claus don't exist. You say, we have to protect our household from these magical creatures. That's honestly cool That's yeah If he was just like some fucking nerdy atheist who is just like yeah Actually the tooth fairy isn't real, but he's like no the tooth fairy is real and you know We need to eradicate the chimney now That fire going that's so cool I mean this this letter goes on and on.

It just says, here's the problem. My oldest lost a tooth, his second, while he was staying with my brother and wanted to sell it to him instead of waiting to keep the key to the only God home. So the tooth fairy was allowed to come. Steve went ahead and bought it from him and then when I picked up my son

and saw he lost the tooth, Steve pretended he would sell it to me if I wanted it. Later he just gave it to me. Well, I mean, he's a sucker, first of all, because I mean, you know, this is the most libertarian shit I've ever heard in my whole life. I was pretty upset and told my son we could put the tooth under his pillow that night for the tooth fairy But my kid was bummed out because he wanted Uncle Steve to keep it. I sold it to him I'm like my brother. I really like the magic of tooth fairy is in Santa But my son isn't buying into it anymore This just goes on and on and on here. I said so I

Okay, I'll tell your tell tell us on then okay, like, I can't buy this tooth from you. But if you knock a few more teeth out, I'll double, like, I'll give you double or nothing for it. Yeah. So we all pick one here. Say, um, offer one of your teeth to the sun as, um, it's kind of recompense. And I think that what Steve is doing is obviously funnier and funnier than just leaving a tooth under your pillow because evidence by the sun being bummed out that, and I do think it is libertarian indoctrination

a little bit, but I think it's probably, I think a lot of kids have to have a libertarian phase. So might as well get it out of the way when they're like six If the Easter bus if the Easter bunny trespasses on my property, I am exercising castle doctrine Assert my right to protect my home from any magical creature or like I don't know Maybe just start telling this kid about other like more frightening magical creatures. Like tell them that they're cousin is a changeling. And that like, and that like while he was so busy keeping Santa and the Easter bunny out of the house, like, you know, an Irish demon replaced his cousin as an infant with some sort of,

you know, yeah, changeling. Um, say, I think you should put a ring of salt around the entire border of your house and say, Uncle Steve is a skin walker and we can't talk to him anymore. We can't hang out with him anymore. Yeah, this is a confusing one. I don't quite know the best course of action in here. It's just sort of like the Donald Trump thing where he said about, like, you're nine, you can't possibly believe in Santa, right? That's, yeah.

So everyone has to have the, the scales fall from their eyes at some point. And the tooth fairy, like, come on, nine years old. I don't know. I think this is just sort of like, like in families, you gotta sort of let households sort of do what they want when it comes to things, like, you know, like in families, you got to sort of let, let, let households sort of do what they want when it comes to things like, should you shoot a magical creature if it trespasses, trespasses on your property?

Yeah. The, the barricading the doors and chimney thing is really funny. I do like that. All right. All right. This is another one from Karen Feeding Insulate. And this one, this is a great one. The headline is, teaching my young boys about consent seemed like a great idea until now. Uh oh. All right. The letter, the letter is as follows. Dear Karen feeding, as a mom of two sons, we've been working on consent since they were old enough to shy away from smooches and hugs at daycare.

Now three and four. Okay, I'm gonna just stop right there and just be like, this is, we said we were working on this for years now. Three and four, that's like really fucking young. I don't know. I'm calling it right now, this is a fake one by some right wing psycho.

This is the risk of teaching kids about consent. Yeah, what says now at three and four, we'll see well, it says now at three and four, we'll see with this one. Now at three and four, we've run into some issues when it comes to brushing our teeth, washing our hair, et cetera. My four-year-old has recently started the whole, I don't want to, it's my body.

His younger brother mimics him about 98% of the time, which I can appreciate when it comes to not hugging great aunt Millie, but when he comes out coated in mud and dirt and won't wash his hair Now we have a problem. I'm trying to empower my boys to make their own choices, haircuts, clothes, etc But most days they come in from playing outside looking like pig pen And I'm pretty sure if I send my kids to daycare smelling like yesterday's socks Someone's gonna call CPS. How can we manage the fine line between physical autonomy and decent hygiene? Reason doesn't seem to work and I'm not a fan of bribery.

Now, I think you have the exact right instinct here to spot a fake post. Yeah. And I'm going to do it. And like there's a couple, there's a couple glaring red flags in this one that like the letter writer is, like someone whose kids have been out of the house for a long time yeah and and and one of them is uh when she says like when they come when they come in from playing they look like pig pant they come in from playing they're covered in mud and dirt kids don't you have that anymore yeah kids don't play outside they've watched their iPads in the basement they're watching the ski bd. That's what they're doing. Yeah, and they're not going to come in there. I'm not going to let them dirt doing that.

And also, if your kids are three and four, what are they doing just playing outside, like, in the street? Like, should you keep them out of them? You working on this for years implies that you've set your one-year-old son down and said, like, let's talk about consent right now, because one year old sundown and said, like, let's talk about consent right now, because it's like so, you know, oh, you're allowed to tell great aunt Millie that you don't want to hug her. I think-

Great Millie is another big red flag there that the person writing this is from a completely different era. And it's certainly not someone who would have a three or four year old kid in 2023. Yes. And the fact that her second solution that she thinks of, that she's not a fan of his bribery is very...

Well, now we're back to the tooth fairy. Yeah, we're back to the Libertarian section. I... Yeah, so I'm calling bullshit on this one. I'm going to say, you don't get any advice. Advice paths are evoked. Because you're a fraud. You know, decent cut, you know, I mean, it was still a strikeout, but you know, you got, you got some wood on the ball at your

time. So I mean, I do like the idea of a, a three year old being like my bodily autonomy prevents me from taking a bath. Yes. You know, it's easy, you know, it's just, it's a little too easy, but, you know, so an effort. You know, it's just it's a little too easy. But you know, solid effort. All right, I'm moving on from Karen Feeding to the slate, how to do it at Vice column, which is all about sex. So headline here is, I brought a priceless work of art into my sex life. Now everything is falling apart. You know, I know those Mark Rothko paintings seem simple, but you really have to see the person. Yeah, an artisan like Jade Cochrane. Well, actually that's not far off.

Okay, so it says, dear, how to do it? I, 46 year old male, work in historic art preservation. A relatively small field, so I have obscured some details of this letter for privacy. A coworker and I began having an affair at work. She is married and shows not to disclose our secret to anyone. About six months ago, she has incredibly talented, attractive, and sexual. We would wait until after work hours to sneak back to the storage areas of our workplace

where we would engage in all sorts of sexual fantasies, many involving art, which is a career and a passion for both of us. You remember when that was like that old lady restored that famous painting of Jesus, and it looked like a fucking finger paintings. It was these people. They were doing sex stuff. The guy nutting and doing the scream.

No, it gets better. So what were those sexual fantasies you asked? Well, I'm glad you did. About a month into our trist twisting, I was receiving an excellent blowjob behind a somewhat famous neoclassical marble statue, which happened to be in our workshop being serviced. Oh, that's not the only thing.

Hey, oh, right before I could orgasm, I had a sudden bout of dizziness, which occasionally happens to me. So to study myself and without thinking, I reached out and grabbed the statue. To be more specific, I reached out and grabbed the statue. To be more specific, I grabbed the larger than life marble ass cheek of a Greek goddess. This cold hardness and sensual confirms of the statue combined with the hot real woman

sucking me off and overwhelmed my sensory brain. It was a good orgasm. My partner noticed and we began incorporating the statue into our sex game at one point having Pretend three sums and even a crisis when bodily fluids and he did emergency cleanup when a priceless work of art I even found myself fondling this artwork while I masturbated alone late after hours. Okay, unfortunately the Peter Greenaway movie This is Peter Greenaway movie. Yeah. Unfortunately, the work on our love statue was completed about two months ago, and the project was packed and shipped back to its museum home, leaving me unable to be aroused.

I have not been able to get a wreck since the statue has gone, considering I'm considering commissioning Aureplica, but a full-size marble and place to put it is beyond my modest means. My partner has been upset with my new found direct health dysfunction and doesn't believe that I'm sincerely love-loan over a piece of sculpted rock. She tried to tempt me with an offer to find a woman to dress up and participate in the same poses or sculpture, but I can't imagine hiring a person

to do something so silly. This is the longest I've gone in my adult life without being aroused. Wow. This guy got got cocked by Venus to my love. I'm trying to find a woman with no arms to incorporate into like a three-sauce situation. I'm thinking of becoming a serial killer like an episode of SVU with Steve from Sex and the City as the killer. Oh, right, right. Yeah. The reputation finished got. Yeah.

Oh, I did like the thing where I did like the point where he said like I was getting heads so good. I got dizzy. It was like he was like having like a stendoll syndrome. But yeah, that's happened all the time. Athena. Yeah. You know, that was a good one.

But I'm also going to say this was fake as fuck. So it was funny, but this is complete bullshit. This is Peter Greenaway wrote that for sure. I was, in this Peter Greenaway, the Peter Greenaway ending for this would be the girl dying and the guy using like wires to like steady her dead body like a statue and then so you could grab the ass and jack off and I think that's what you should do. I think you should kill

the girl and go full peter green away on it. Was it like was it movie like the the stomach of a critic? This is like the I don't know. Oh the belly of an architect? The belly of an architect? Yeah. This is the, I don't know, the blow job from an art restore. Yeah. All right. This is the next how to do it question. Headline, I think my alone time sex habit is fine. My friend thinks it's deeply sinister. Okay, horrible, wait a second. My alone time sex habit. I think my alone time sex. If you have to start a sentence like that, it means it's not fine.

If that has to be the first thing out of your mouth. Dear, how to do it. Can you please settle an argument between my friend and me, both 21 year old female. We recently had a late night discussion about sex and porn. I mentioned that I sometimes found this depth family videos that are all over every porn site pretty hot. I was surprised by her reaction.

She basically said she thought I might need therapy and probe me about whether I had been sexually abused as a child. I was not. My contention was that I wasn't a deviant. Again these videos are obviously being watched by millions of people and the people who watch this kind of porn are not really into incest, but turned on by the naughtyness and transgression. I said this statistically, of course.

Some viewers are people with genuine incest fantasies about real-life family members, but that those people are a tiny fraction of the population, and that step porn isn't making mentally healthy people want to have sex with their parents or siblings. My friend said incest is much more common than most people think and that porn normalizes it. She insisted she was not an abuse victim herself, though, and this is just something she feels strongly about. I didn't know what to say. Am I contributing to a culture of abuse

and sometimes by sometimes getting off with two adult teenage sons stumbling upon his hot, horny mom trapped in a dryer? Wait, trapped in a dryer, okay. She's trapped. Is that an actual scenario? Wait, you're not familiar with the dryer scenario has No, I'm not you're not she's trapped in a dryer. Yeah, yeah, it's like you know You like you you walk into the laundry room and step mom is like going as you know as often happens

You go too far into the dryer to get socks out and you're like your stuff and you're a shirt of like half on all fours and you're like help please I'm stuck in the dryer and then you you know have to have some stuff on. Oh so the dryer door is not closed and it's What's going into this pin cycle, fuck! No! No! No! Take her out in her hair is all like a troll doll. Those are dry or sheets in there. Your stepmom will be bounty fresh. It sounds like your friend isn't more into it than you are, honestly. He's a special.

And, you know, like, there's a lot of children with a divorce out there, and I just like to remind all of them that step parents and siblings aren't your real family, and never will be. They don't count. They don't count. But yeah, like just moms and step-subsying out there, be careful about when you're changing the laundry over from washer to dryer because it's a very common thing to happen. You can fall in, you can get trapped in there and get turned on.

I think it's probably fine. I think this person is probably fine. Yeah, I wouldn't stress you much about it. I wouldn't worry about it too much. Just tell your friend, yeah, I stopped watching that stuff. She doesn't have to know. Yeah. Okay, this is the next, how to do it?

Wait, it would be funny if that, the person met their friend's dad, and the friend's dad is like the sexiest like rock hard, bobby, like, it looks like Don Draper. Yeah. Could you help me get this pie out of the oven? Yeah, like a Tom of Finland guy like mowing the lava.

Shopping wood in the backyard. All right. This is the next how to do it question headline. I have specific requirements for a guy's package. None of them want to hear it. Dear how to do it. I'm a heterosexual woman in my late 20s. I've discovered after some experimentation

that while guys with bigger penises are nice to look at, they can be annoying and awkward to take. And sex is really much better with guys who are below average in the size department. However, I struggle to communicate this with prospective partners. Guys seem to have some sort of instinctive need to hear that they're bigger than average, and get some combination of defensive and angry if you even suggest that they're not.

And they seem to be completely uncomprehending of a woman who prefers a smaller partner. It's cost me a few encounters that could have otherwise gone well. How do I communicate with a man that I'm looking for someone with a small penis without putting their backs up? Okay. Just what do you think they all I'll build this up. I'll build this one. Okay, you can handle this one. To the letter writer, please reach out to Choppo Trap House at gmail.com and you know,

if you're on Instagram or whatever, just drop a link, you know. I mean, like, does she think that guys can like control it? Can you please go small? I mean like does she think that guys can like control it? Bring it up on the character select screen because you just like take that bar down just like a few tips far down all the way Like why bring it up You're like just by talking about it, like you're causing a problem that there were, there's none need to exist. Yeah.

There's none need to exist. Like, like, okay, like, you're with, you're with a guy for the first time. You know, like, you're back at someone's place, you know, it's like, it's going there. Yeah, I have to cross your path. You take off your pants. You like, you know, and you, at that moment of anticipation,

you know, you're unbuckleable belt the pants come down, the underwear too, the penis is there. And then you look at it and you're like, oh, thank God, I was worried for a second, you had an average to large size dick. But thank God, that's not the case. It's like the crying game. She sees a huge dick and throws it up into a trash can. Yeah. Yeah, like, it seems like a very simple solution. Just don't. Yeah, just don't comment on the size of it. Oh, you're so small. I can barely feel you. Oh, you're you're not filling me up. This was great. Yeah. Now we moved on from the the sex questions. So like this is like the standard deer prudence, the classic deer prudy advice column. And this

this first one headline, help. My friends are taking advantage of wheelchair rides at the airport. I just might join them. Okay. The first one, dear prudence, and then starting it with help is, is this the Beatles album? Sorry.

Sorry. A friend who vacations often discovered free wheelchair rides throughout the airport, making her first in line to, from ticket counter, security TSA to departure arrival gates to baggage claim and first boarding with access to on board storage. Recently, her partner, who was running behind with the luggage, realized he too could get a chair and that the attendant must also haul the luggage. Put some meds and check luggage, marked it in medical supplies, and it's free.

All of this, if they have difficulty walking long distances, which they claim is nearly everybody. Certainly us gearsers, given the size of expanded, huge airports. At first I thought they were taking unfair advantage or being unethical, but the more I think about it, the less I care. I travel rarely, navigating the airport logistics of knowledgeable assistance sounds reassuring.

I can claim difficulty walking long distances, as well as anybody. Now, I don't think that this is really an advice seeking letter. I think this is a letter just advertising to the rest of society that you can do this. Yeah, because now that I'm aware of this, you better believe I'm getting real cherished just this next time I met an airport. Signed Jerry Seinfeld. Like this is such a George, a George Costanza thing to do. Like this is fully, just be wary of like a Seinfeldian, come up and come in your way. You know, keep an eye out if there any, there any, if Kramer starts seeing a girl in a wheelchair or something

and she calls you out or something like that might happen. It could be coming through a hilarious comedic, denue mom, but yes. Until that time, just like take advantage, because I fucking, I mean airports are the fucking worst. Jesus. Yeah, I feel mentally handicapped every time I'm just inside one. So I might as well just go the extra step and pretend to be disabled. Yeah. It'd

be, bring a blanket, put it over your legs like a full nine yards. I have a monocle and like a cigarette in the holder as well. Also, is there one, has there always been one prudence or is the new one all listed like? It's like it's like the dollar llama. Okay. They find they find an infant somewhere and lay out like all the previous prudences, you know, letter answering technologies. Okay, we find the next one. Okay, dear prudence, help. I think my partner's self-diagnosed autism is a hundred percent fake. Oh, I mean, I'm not even gonna read the letter here,

I'm just gonna answer it for you. It is. Next one. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Well, I think it's a sign of autism to give yourself fake autism.

It's probably, it's like a snake eating its own tail. You know? Yes. Um, all right, this next one's a good one. Dear, your prudence. Help. I left my husband for the guy next door. Now my neighbors feel betrayed.

Oh my god. Uh, dear produce, this August I left my husband for my next door neighbor. My husband was upset, but we are now on good terms. Okay. That's a little. Is his the neighbor mowing your lawn now or something? I mean, is that the one who was just negotiated? He's got a clean the leaves out of the gutter. That's pretty housewives.

That's like my problem is with our other neighbors, the Barclays. I love their center. My eight year old son is best friends with their nine year old daughter and she usually lives at our house after school. Since my affair, they have refused to speak to me and forbidden their daughter from being in our house when I am there. We are alternating days. They have also blocked and deleted my number. The reasoning is that I betrayed their friendship. I agree I betrayed my affair as partner's wife. We were friends, but them? The interesting thing is that Mr. Barclay had in the fair five years ago. I believe their silent treatment stems from Mrs. Barclay's misplaced anger at her husband. She also stung the woman he slept with. I don't care

about losing the Barclay's friendship, but it's very triggering that our kids continue to play at their house every day, but that she isn't allowed to come with your Rs as if I'm a criminal. I just feel it just feels like unjust punishment. How do I get them to reverse course? Just like how another affair? Yeah, I think you got to get Mr. Barclay or Mrs. Barclay and your husband together in a room. Yes, try and get them. All skills will be evenly balanced at that thing. All accounts settled. No one will have any reason to be mad.

Yes, yes, exactly. And I think, I honestly, I think you've got to take your lumps with this one. Like, it seems like you've got a pretty sweet deal going. If you're with the next door, the hunky next door neighbor, you left your drip of a husband behind, and he's still on good terms with you, that's really incredible. You're pretty set up. Like, you say you don't care about the Barclays friendship. Like, just like, you don't have to, you don't have, I'm from Freaking New York City. You don't have to be friends with your neighbors. You don't even have to, like, be aware of their existence. Even though they're like 10 yards away from you. Exactly.

I like this letter because it, like, it reads like a, you know, the other one was like, uh, was in a Peter Greenway film. Listen to me, I was like a John Sheefer story. This is like, look at my husband won't stop going in our neighbor's swimming pool. I've left him years ago, our house is empty. He has nowhere to go. He just keeps swimming. Yeah, no, I, um, fully, I think to fuck the barclays. You know, unless they were giving you free tickets to their center, that's totally a non starter. All right, let's see, all right.

Next, let's make this the last question here. All right, this is dear privilege. Help, my father insists on ruining my precious visits with my uncle. So this is like, this is a good question. This is like a great uncle, uncle magic. Dear prudence, a few years ago, I asked my uncle to teach me how to whittle carve over FaceTime.

When I showed no aptitude for carving, it morphed into weakly low pressure, lovely catch-up session we both enjoyed. This all changed when my uncle invited my father, his brother, to join us. Before I get into the question, I just want to say like, I think just the idea of your uncle teaching you to whittle over FaceTime is like so precious. I know, that's so lovely. That's so cool. That's so beautiful. Apparently, some family who's fucking brother, my dad is gonna screw it up. My fucking dad. Thanks, dad. You're embarrassing me in front of Uncle. I have a good, but not easy relationship with my dad,

that I navigate by carefully choosing what I share with him. I would never share that I'm learning to whittle. Yeah, I'm just gonna be more than I feel like I'll do it anymore. I don't even have a little whistle to give you for Christmas. Dad. No clogs for you, dad. Sorry. I have a good, so it says, he now attends every week

and what was a low pressure outlet has become the opposite. I skip out a lot. When I do attend, I'm subjected to comments on my appearance, interrogations on my job situation, and my very favorite. My dad always working a celebrity I once loved who has since revealed devastatingly problematic beliefs and who my dad still admires into the conversation. Now this is really the only like relevant part of the letter

that I noticed or cared about is just trying to figure out who this celebrity is. Yeah, okay, let's work on it. We got a whittling family. So they're probably white. They probably live in the woods. They're probably. They live in woodland country.

Yeah, they live in woodland country. Maybe West Virginia. Let's say, probably not Dave Chappelle. Probably. But he says he's Michael Rapaport. No. I used to love record rapper part Hmm probably But he says he's a Michael rap report I used to love record rapper for it until all of the Beautiful acting style and when I discovered oh, he's not acting

When I saw his sort of like the his palid flush screaming into a phone camera I was like oh I can't talk about this guy with my uncle anymore. When I saw his the most alcoholic face in the world, I knew my dad's going to probably love him. I really am at a loss for who it might be. Maybe like, to Army Hammer. Well, going back to the kid who's into cannibalism. Yeah, this is bad. This is brother.

I don't know. I just like, I just gonna be funny if it was like, I don't know, it's not his beliefs, whatever. But I was just reading this thing. It's like, it's a Whitland family of good, you know, Salted in the Earth American folk. And the celebrity in question is Woody Allen. Every time he got, he hops on a whittling chat. He's just like, oh, I got to tell you about watch husbands and wives again last night. Oh, man, what a picture.

Man, if that's the case, send your dad over my way. We can talk husbands and wives the whole day. Talk money. I'll be in the dryer. I says, I no longer enjoy these face times. I feel terrible for my own girl, who is very kind, very close to my dad, and who may or may not understand why I so often opt out of these weekly meetups. I don't know. I don't really have any advice for this one. I just say, not up and just, you know, who cares if your dad keeps

bringing up Woody Allen during your FaceTime. You know, just keep moving on. Just keep doing you. Yeah, just maybe text your, I don't know how text savvy your uncle is. Sounds like he's using FaceTime, which, you know, bodes well, maybe text him separately. All of the stuff you don't want to talk about with your dad. And explain, you know, hey, you know, my dad, he, he's a big fan of, you know, Harvey Weinstein. I don't want to tell him about any of this private stuff that I'm telling you. Yeah.

But I would say just not up and go to the meetings. It's gonna be, you're gonna be glad you did it in the future. You're gonna be glad you learned how to whittle. Yeah, you failed at it. Well, so that doesn't for our advice questions. I want to thank you so much for subbing in for us today. Yes, thank you for having me and holding it down.

But I thought, maybe just at the end of the show, I would take this opportunity to maybe just sort of bat around some ideas for season two of movie mindset. If you would go to the movie, absolutely. I also would like to plug the seeking arrangements help line to if anyone has any questions they want answered. And please also subscribe to Seeking Derangement so on Patreon. Yes, absolutely.

I've got a few ideas here. I'll put my notes dock for season two and I just want to throw a few ideas out for you here. The first one I have is just Walter Hill. And I don't know what movies to do. Yes. Walter Hill. He does so many, I mean like, always movies to do, but yeah, Walter Hill. Cause like, there's just, he does so many, I mean, like,

all his movies are for like tough guys, but like, he does like a lot of different kinds of movies. You know, like, I don't know what I do. I do something comfort extreme prejudice, you know, the warrior times. Yeah, the warriors, the assignment. Okay, let's do that one. Well, we already covered that on CD. Yeah. Right.

No, twice, I think we actually covered it twice. Because we forgot we already did it once. But, yeah, Walter Hill would be amazing. I would love a Walter Hill moment. 48 hours too. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Kind of a darker lethal weapon. Yeah, rigs never use the hard art word,

and lethal weapon like yeah yeah rigs never uses the hard are word it's truly yeah but the poster makes you think it's gonna be a funny you know a fun filled romp but then oh you know what the whole movie I just watched the other day the lawn riders which is fantastic this movie about the other James gang really good oh dang there's like a lot of really good bullet hits and a lot of really good like slow mo of people being like thrown or shot through glass in that movie. Yeah.

Another idea I had, and like this one, I'm gonna rely on your expertise because this is a director, this has been requested a lot, but I have to admit that my knowledge of their canon of work is appallingly low. So my idea for another episode would be, Hessa teaches me about Mr. WRFASBender.

Oh my God, yes, yes, that would be amazing. Oh my God, we could do any year with 13 moons, we could do the bitter tears of Petrovon and can. We could do world, oh my god. A world of wires. A world of wires. I wanna see it. Yeah, that's it's so good. Mookie, I know the bitter tears of Petrovon

can is one of Connor Bebe's favorite movies. So maybe it's one of my favorite movies. Let me get a guess for that episode. Yes. Another idea ahead is I would like to get Andrew Hudson back on the show. And I'd like to get Taylor as well. Andrew Hudson and Taylor, two pock directs if you're out there.

I'd love to have you back for season two to do an episode on 90s Robert Altman. So like the player and shortcuts. Short cuts is so good. Let's see here. And then what would you say about doing an episode on animated films? Animated films of the Japanese variety. I was just favorites. I was literally just thinking this I was like maybe we could get Felix on for

For that one get I I think you know would be a fun one that I was thinking of would be an OCE episode where we do like Ghost in the Shell. I was thinking Pat Labor too. Which is probably his best movie. And then like Avalon, which is this crazy, old-ish-life-action movie. Yes. Yes. I think I don't know.

OCE would have to be its own episode because I don't know, it would be very hard for me not to do Ghost in the Shell. So maybe like OCE could be its own episode and then I'm not a single, I don't know, like, see, Oshii would have to be its own episode because like, I don't know, it would be very hard for me not to do Ghosts in the Shell. So maybe like Oshii could be its own episode and then on a single, I don't know, like, it's a Toshikon, like, Perfect Blue or something like that. Yes, Perfect Blue and Millennium Actress or Tokyo Godfathers is maybe my second favorite by him. That's like one of the best Christmas movies ever.

Oh, do you know what I watched? Do you know what I watched the other you know what would be? What I watched the other day that was unbelievably good what was pennies from heaven? Oh, I haven't seen that one if we do like a Dennis Potter episode the the famed British TV writer who wrote such such television series as the singing detective and such television series as the Singing Detective and the pennies from Heaven series, as well as the movie, and also made like all these crazy movies like Blade on a Fether and like just a real class act. The world is our oyster truly. There's so many. Oh, so you know movie I watched this weekend, being of a British filmmaker that was fucking fantastic.

Which one? David Leans, Hobbson's Choice that was fucking fantastic. Which fun. David Leans, Hubsons Choice, starring the great Charles Lotton. Oh, I've never seen that one. Oh, it's so good. It's one of his comedies, and it's about like, it takes place in the Victorian era, and Charles Lotton is this like, tyrannical small business owner who owns like a boot shop, and he basically just wants to be a

miser and drunk all the time and it's about this sort of contest of wills he engages in with his three daughters who he all makes work for free in the boot shop. But if you want to see some like excellent, excellent physical comedy of Charles lot and being shit faced and it also has like one of the great really tender and moving love stories in And it also has like one of the great, really tender and moving love stories in it as well. Hobbson's choice, I highly recommend it. Oh, do you know what would be really good? One, actually, the guy who made the shout,

have you ever seen the shout? No, I don't think I have. It's such a will movie. You would lose your mind at the shout. The shout is about... It's about a guy getting his dick sucked next to a statue. No, it's Alan Bates and John Hurt, and it's from the 70s.

And Alan Bates is this mysterious sexual wanderer who wanders into John Hurt's house. And it's like, I lived in Australia among the average knees for 30 years and I you know every I they taught me their magic and John heard is like wow When do you think you're gonna leave? He basically John heard is like a struggling experimental musician who can't make any good music and like kind

of sounds like performance. It's it's well the the the crux of it is that Alan Alan Bates is like. Um, they taught me a shout that can instantly kill anyone who hears it. Oh, yeah. And John heard is like, no, they fucking didn't you're lying. And he's like, are you put no wax? Well, he well, no, he um, he goes out to hear the shout, and I don't want to spoil it,

but some stuff happens. After it's truly an incredible movie. And it's the director of Depend, the one about the spa with Soundtrack by Cannes. And I think the director also did EO recently. Oh, right, the Donkey movie. Yeah a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm a director, I'm I apologize to all Polish people. All Polish people, if you figured out how to press play on this episode, I'm deeply apologize. Okay.

I mean, I don't, I mean, I have a few more ideas. I'm gonna give too much away here. I'm gonna leave a few back. We're like, I don't know. I was just thinking like we gotta do a rubber Mitchem episode. Yes. And I think we gotta do a James Cagney episode. But I was thinking like, what about some of the great actresses?

Like, could we have been to an actress episode yet? And the movie mindset promises that we will never feature a female director, but there are some great, there are some great names in front of the camera. Yeah, well, I don't know. I think a female director can be just kidding about that. If we do a Lillianna Cavani episode, we can do a Francesco.

Yeah, Francesco. And also the skin that you free of. Josh, please lines with. Yes, yes. There's also, yeah, I think a good actress would be like Marlena Dietrich with Taylor. I was just going to say Marlena Dietrich. Yeah, there's like a ton we can do. I can't.

I'm my brain cell. Some of those classic screen games. All right. Well, I don't think it too much. We will discuss further, but movie reminds us season two will be coming in 2024. But let's leave it there for today. So I want to thank you so much for filling in today. Once again, I was a pleasure.

Pleasure. Thank you for dispensing such valuable advice. And just you're not already a seeking derangement subscriber. Please get on that. Yes. And don't forget if you have questions, submit them to the seeking derangements help line. Yes. And I'm going to just double check after we hang up that, that's not Ben's personal number. Yeah, it's not Ben. Well, let me know before this is released. Yes, I will in a moment. All right, so once again, thank you so much. Till next time, everybody.

Bye-bye. Bye. We take all the action we can make and we cover all of Northeastern. We cover all of North East Asia When the strip sits down we run a ministry From the fire roads to the interstate Now some guys they just give up living And start down a little piece by piece

Some guys come home from work and wash up And go racing in the street Tonight, tonight, this frips just right I wanna burn all out of the sink We're calling out around the world We're going racing in this dream Thank you. you