Chapo Trap House - 840 - Tom of Finlandization (6/10/24)
Episode Date: June 11, 2024Last week, we looked at Trump’s felony convictions and the various weaknesses that brings his campaign. This week, we turn to Biden world. First, Hunter is in court on federal gun charges, leading u...s all to learn about his bizarre taste crack music. Then, we spend the majority of this ep reading through the absolutely addled interview Joe Biden gave to Time magazine last week. How cooked is he? Can we make sense of any of this? How could we get two candidates this bad leading their presidential tickets? We discuss all inside.
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All I'm gonna do is hit a joker All I'm gonna do is hit a joker Hello everybody, it's Monday, June 10th, 2024.
We've got drop off coming at you.
It's me, Felix and Amber today.
I'm going to break it down.
And I guess I'd like to begin today with some of the ongoing travails of the Joe Biden administration.
Last week, we obviously dealt with the fallout from Trump's felony convictions in the New
York court.
So, in the interest of fairness, I think we do need to discuss some of the things that continue to play the Biden administration as well as his son's legal woes.
Now, I should say this, that we're going to be discussing a Biden interview and some of the
more intractable geopolitical apocalypses that he seems to be presiding over.
But I do have to say that I have never felt stronger than the feeling that I do have now
that Biden somehow will win this presidential election in November.
And I'm like, this is not informed on anything other than just vibes, other than just my
feeling and just sort of general like betting on the stupidest worst possible outcome.
But I will say, last week when the Trump convictions hit, the New York Times assembled this panel
of undecided voters to give the usual like totally conflicted and bizarre like, to give
responses that are like accurate and telling about like how the average American voter
thinks that is nonetheless totally baffling and incomprehensible to anyone who takes a comprehensive interest in politics.
And there was one thing, I don't know the gentleman in question, but there's one thing
the undecided voter said that really stuck with me, and I think it will damage Trump
in the long term.
And that was, he said, of his felony convictions, he said, yeah, I believe this was a witch
hunt.
I think the Democrats are out to get him.
But nonetheless, if you're supposed to be a billionaire and you can't commit tax fraud
and falsification of business records without the feds getting you, then you are not a competent
chief executive.
And then he also said, there are so many more attractive porn stars other than Stormy Daniels
to make an sex review. So many more attractive porn stars other than Stormy Daniels.
So I just like I think like calls into question both his judgment and his taste because I
mean I think the biggest liability for Biden is his age.
And as we've said before, the biggest liability for Trump is that he's a known quantity and
that quantity is loser.
And just like even if you think the felony convictions are, uh,
illegitimate in some way, it doesn't speak well of, of this, uh,
American Caesar figure to not be able to get away with paying off a mistress
to keep her mouth shut.
Yeah.
Alvin Bragg, even the most unimpressive Caesar, even the Caesar of like Cicero
Illinois would be able to overcome Alvin
you could overcome Alvin Bragg by gifting someone in his office Hulu premium
not even the kind with no ads just less ads he's crossing the ruby Tuesdays con
yeah that's another thing i'm sick of how many fucking Rubicons are there in America?
I'm so sick of it.
Anytime something like this happens, people are like, the Rubicon's been crossed.
Watch me lay down another year.
I think it speaks to the fact that Americans at this point love a scammer.
Oh, it's not for you.
It's more of a Shelbyville idea.
Now, wait just a minute. We're twice as smart as the people of Shelbyville.
Just tell us your idea and we'll vote for it.
But we hate it when they're bad at it. It's a different kind of loser.
Like, you know, there's the suckers who get scammed,
and then there's the guy who just trips over his own dick trying to screw everyone over.
And like, that guy's just more embarrassing.
Oh, this is bad. This is really bad.
You're working your slave and you steal just enough for a sweet lick of that shiny brass ring.
Don't I get a lick? Doesn't Gil get a lick?
You know, Amber, you're right. It's sort of like the difference between how Martha Stewart
remains a beloved cultural figure and in fact is probably even more beloved for having done a bit in prison. And Elizabeth Holmes is just like, loser, get her out of here. She's the
bad kind of scammer, the one who believed her own bullshit and is now doing a 10 year
stretch.
I will never forget what my, uh, my dad said his legal analysis of the Martha Stewart case
in 2002. He was like, really, they're just sending her to prison
because she's a bitch, but I bet Penn lay's a bitch too.
And I was like, yeah.
She was largely disliked, yeah.
I mean, it's not like she did anything that they don't all do.
Yeah, no, that's exactly what he meant.
And he was right.
That was at the core of it. And he would know he was right. That is that was, you know, at the core of it.
It was just that she was like mean and they were like, oh, you, you know, this woman
who's made seven hundred trillion dollars off of like finished
cutting boards. Oh, you made twenty thousand dollars on a stock that doesn't exist anymore.
We're going to kill you.
So, yeah, it's just it's yeah, I think it's not so much that Trump is a felon.
I think it's just that he's an incompetent one.
And the things he's getting convicted for are embarrassing penny anti crimes.
You know, he's not exactly John Dillinger over here.
You know, he's not like Bonnie and Clyde.
But we but we should talk about Joe Biden's son, who is facing some legal difficulties of his own.
And you know, like, this is, this is why it's my advice, never to get involved in a trial
of any kind, if at all possible avoid being prosecuted. Because especially if you're a
person of note, all of your exes will be called to testify about what a shitty person you are.
But the funny thing about the Hunter Biden trial where he's facing, what is it?
Like federal gun charges because you can't own a gun or possess a gun if you're
a drug addict, which seems sort of unconstitutional to me.
It's a weird one. Yeah.
Like there's so many things that could have like there's so many things that could have.
There's so many things that could have got him on.
And it was just like the most white trash.
It's something that like my stepbrother would get in trouble for.
It's not supposed to be the son of the president.
That's what they it's what they get every rapper for on federal gun charges.
If you have like any type of felony at all,
like you do federal time, if you've bought a handgun,
you remember when Lil Wayne was like in Rikers for a year?
That's what they got him.
It's like the charge that US attorneys use for rappers.
With Hunter Biden, I know he's a crackhead,
but it's like, aren't you like a lawyer?
What he is, I don't think I've ever looked into his education or I don't I don't I've just completely shoved that to the back of my mind. Right now. He's just hunter the way like Paris Hilton was paired like, like, he's just, he's just a he's just a fear. He's just another wacky another wacky disaster.
I mean, the thing I like about this trial, though, is that the
prosecution is calling like all of his ex girlfriends and former
paramourists to testify, but it does seem like it is. I mean,
like, it seems like they're being character witnesses for
Hunter Biden. I'm just going to read here from the Politico
account. It says, two of Hunter Biden's exes describe his years of drug abuse.
And I know the prosecution, like they think they're nailing him to the cross
with this, but it says here, Wilmington, Delaware, Hunter Biden's federal trial
on gun related charges took a personal turn on Wednesday as two of his former
romantic partners, including his ex-wife Kathleen Beale, took to this witness
stand and described Biden's
years of abuse and crack cocaine. Both women were called by prosecutors who have charged the
president's son with three felonies stemming from the purchase of a handgun on October 2018.
Prosecutors say he lied about his drug addiction on a federal gun purchasing form, then he legally
possessed the gun for about two weeks. So going on it says says the next witness, Zoe Kestin, a former
romantic partner of Biden, she testified she met him on December 17th, 2017, when
she worked at a strip club in Midtown Manhattan and he booked her and another
woman for a private dance.
Biden played the music by the indie folk band Fleet Foxes on his phone and he
smoked something she assumed was crack.
That's the most- That's embarrassing. That's not stripper music.
He's gotta be the first guy in history to smoke crack to the Fleet Foxes.
That's insane. Like that is- put him in supermax.
Yeah, this is why you don't wanna get prosec prosecuted. You did. They're gonna parade all
your exes out. I would kill myself. Well, Amber, yeah, listen to this, though. I mean, there's an
embarrassing disclosure that he smokes crack while listening to Fleet Foxes, which, you know, can I
recommend a little Hall and Oates, you know, private eyes are watching you. They see your every move.
But I want to say there's one quote here
that right after it says and you listen to the indie band Fleet Foxes and smoke
something she assumed was crack then she says quote I felt really safe around him
she said fellas fellas this is what I got to say here this is the way women
treat you this is the way females treat you when you're over six feet tall.
You can literally be smoking crack in front of them all day long and they will say shit
like, I feel really safe around him.
He was so alert and present at all times.
He had something to say instantly.
He was really listening, really hard.
I like that this is part of the legal process, like a humiliation ritual.
I like the, like, if I, if I ever like, if I like committed securities fraud, I
imagine that they would do, they would just bring in every girl I've ever known.
And they would be like, he made me watch Pink Floyd's, the wall on DVD.
20 minutes to find a DVD player
and it was underneath a pile of pants.
I would be, I would be.
You can't object, it's not, even though it's not related.
He used to fall asleep in his pants and his jeans
and not take his money out, so when he woke up
in the morning, he would be walking around
and coins would just be falling off of his of his back because they stopped him throughout the night.
Like an 80's submitted stereo.
Just ding ding ding ding ding.
Objection, objection. I would ask the court to have Miss Frost's comment stricken from the record.
The jury will ignore that.
By the way, speaking of a stitched up trials going on right now,
Felix, I know you saw that clip from the young thug trial that's going around.
That shit is insane.
Has anyone in Georgia has anyone in Georgia passed the fucking bar?
Like what the judge of that case is like, call the order.
It's illegal for the defense to have secrets.
No secrets in the courtroom.
I mean, it's amazing to me that this story isn't getting like,
it's crazy.
This story is broken by like, Young Thugger fan account,
like YSL News.
It's amazing, because there are cameras in this trial.
And basically, Young Thug's defense,, his attorney just got hit with a contempt charge
and was taken out of the court by the bailiff because he confronted the judge
with information he received about an ex parte communication between the judge,
the prosecutor and a witness, compelling him to testify that he wasn't present for.
And the judge is like, but before we deal
with any of that, I'm going to need to know who told you that. And like, confirm that
this communication took place. But then it was just like, I'm going to give you five
minutes to tell me who told you this. And then or else we're going to have problems.
Like it's insane. Like I get like if you're you know, there are a billion judges that
like, they are, they're not impartial, they're completely allied with
the prosecution.
That's probably like most criminal courts in America, right?
But most of the time, they don't do it in such a slapdash fashion where they are creating
the most appealable case of all time.
Even at this point, if this doesn't get like if another
court doesn't intervene or this doesn't just get fucking thrown out or whatever, like how
how will this not be appealed to oblivion? This is one of the like the most fucked up
courts I have ever seen in my life. Like was this like was it his first day? Rico trial
like he had never been a judge before. He just passed the bar.
Was he one of those like county lawyers?
Jack McCoy would never would never let some shenanigans like this.
Was he wearing like a I bet he was wearing like a seersucker suit under the robe. Like
he wanted he wanted to sort of embody a kind of like classic, you know,
thing but he was like kind of resentful about like he they wouldn't let him wear the outfit.
It put him in a sour mood.
Ever he's a sicko. So he's he's he's completely nude from the waist down. But he's still wearing
suspenders. He's still wearing suspenders just like clipped to an elastic waistband and nothing
else. His judicial gown.
sock garters too.
He just likes to he likes to feel to, he likes to feel it snap.
He likes to feel a snap when he issues a contempt charge.
Absolute pervert.
Yeah.
He's probably mad.
He's probably mad because he wanted to like do a good, like
old fashioned race, like a Southern racist case.
Yeah.
Where it's like someone like whistled at a woman or something like that.
Someone stole molasses.
Yeah, time to kill case.
But no, he has to do the young thug case,
the most confusing case ever.
The young thug case is, you know,
it is a racially swapped version of the Lev Parnas affair
as far as I'm concerned.
I'm so confused
There's so many love parties in this case I didn't know there were so many lead parties in Atlanta. I
Saw I saw I saw another amazing clip from it
We're for one of the witnesses pleaded the fifth one asked how old are you and then they were like you can answer the question
How old are you and he just says I'm an adult
Such a good answer.
I think that was such a good answer.
So, sorry, just to return to the other miscarriage of justice in the Hunter Biden trial.
Speaking of the young lady who said she felt very safe around him,
she saw him again a week later and they stayed together for five days at the Soho Grand Hotel.
He typically smoked crack every 20 minutes, she testified, and that he was just so charming
and so nice.
At the time, I felt myself having feelings for him.
Women are demons.
Women are demons.
What is this woman's life?
What guys did she date before Hunter Biden?
This is like I said, when you're six feet tall or or or above that,
you can do anything you can do.
And you can smoke crack and listen to the fleet foxes and women
will find themselves falling for you.
If you think about it, Hunter is the opposite of, you know,
a very typical five nine boyfriend that many women have experienced.
The guy who's one in particular is not I don't think you do this. I've never seen you do this. I don't think you would do it.
It's for a different type of guy. It's the type of guy where
him and his best gal are always going to local establishments.
And within an hour, he's always like trying to grab her wrist for some reason they're going
the late guy and
You know a tall striking crack addicted lawyer is kind of the opposite of that. He's not gonna grab your wrist
He's like just go if you want. Yeah, he's got other things on his mind. Yeah
Yeah, he's got other things on his mind. Yeah, I've got practice mode.
Yeah, go or don't or stay here and listen to, uh, listen to Feist while I smoke while
I pre-pick.
Listen to all the songs that they use to advertise the iPod Nano and the Shutterworks 2004 with
me.
Yeah, he just puts on like the Starbucks mixtape and he's just like, actually, Regina Spector's
later work is really good.
It's like he has never listened to his song.
Like he does have like he did have that like one rap song that he showed his lawyer.
But beyond that, it is all exclusively shit that was used to advertise the Zune.
Yeah.
It is industry plant, like indie stuff.
It's such a distinct soundscape that he has.
It's Starbucks music.
It's just like you can ignore it and you can't tell them apart.
And I think that maybe it's kind of like, you know, crack keys up. So
I'm told and like maybe he needs like kind of a white noise and that's his version of
like playing crashing waves or whatever. So he doesn't like jump out a window.
Yeah. I think, yeah, I think he probably had like, he probably has like bad experiences listening to like, by his age. Yeah. Rush. No effects. Like, like
harder stuff. What do you first start smoking crack? And he freaked out, you know, he like,
he ran through a plate glass window. He like, you know, he probably did some of the things
from American Psycho. Like he tried to put a kitten into an ATM. He did all that stuff. And he was
like, no more, no more early nineties pop punk or anything for me. That's that gets
me too crazy.
He was a sound we are going to listen to the sounds of Dumbo, New York City, Brooklyn in
2004. No, she was on an hour, hour, hour 65 of a cocaine crack vendor and I was hitting up
the ATM to take out another few hundred dollars and for a brief second the screen said, feed
me a major.
Look, we joke around a lot.
We don't approve of when Patrick Bateman did that to the cat.
In the book.
No, I think he's actually not a role model.
I don't think he's cool at all.
Yeah.
Come on, Bryce.
There are a lot more important problems than Sri Lanka to worry about.
Like what?
Well, we have to end apartheid for one and slow down the nuclear arms race,
stop terrorism and world hunger.
Patrick, how thought provoking.
Well, moving on from the sins of the son to the sins of the father.
The other week, Joe Biden gave an interview to Time magazine.
And I thought this would be good. I have a transcript of the interview here.
And the only way I think we could do justice to this interview
is if Felix reads the Biden parts, because this was comprehensively
the most E1 Biden that we've seen in a while.
So I mean, like just this sort of like there are a couple of big,
big issues confronted in this interview of, like I mean, like, just this sort of like, there are a couple of big, big issues confronted
in this interview of, like I said, the several geopolitical catastrophes that are currently
unfolding on his watch.
But like, let's just, let's just get a little glimpse inside the Biden White House.
And the other funny thing about this interview is that like, four of his aides, including
John Kirby, were in the room while the interview was being given and interjected various moments.
So for this interview, I will be reading the part of the Time magazine journalist and Felix
will be playing the part of Joe Biden.
Now I've given Felix instructions that these answers are kind of long.
So feel free to trail off into incoherence at will. And you will basically accurately
capture the nature of this conversation that Joe Biden had. So without further ado, this
is a Time Magazine's interview with Joe Biden.
Thank you for doing this, Mr. President. We appreciate your time. Busy moment. I'll dive
right in. You're traveling next week to Normandy for the 80th anniversary of D-Day to commemorate
a turning point in America's leadership with the free world.
But the anniversary comes at a time when the U.S. under your leadership has been unable
to deter a crisis, first in Afghanistan, then Ukraine, Israel, and mounting tensions in
the Far East.
Is America still able to play the role of world power that it played in World War II
and in the Cold War?
Yeah, we're playing it even more. We are, we're the world power and what I inherited
as a consequence of the mistakes that we made, they all made in Afghanistan, it's not a loss
in Afghanistan, Excuse my cold.
We are, we've had compared to the rest of the world put together as strong as lines and history is the world.
Number one, number two, we're not number two, number two, the order of the, the,
the thing, if you're black, listen to the radio, we're in a situation where we have
to be able to move in a way that recognizes how much of the world has changed and still
lead the world.
And it's in our security.
For example, the idea that if when Putin decided to go to Russia, I mean, if he's going to
go from Russia into Ukraine, the reason why I
cleared the intelligence so we can release the information we knew that he was going
to attack was to let the world know he was still in charge.
We still know what's going on.
I know what's going on.
I'm here.
You're here.
Welcome to the room. This point he pulls out a copy of his speech that Putin delivered on the eve, on the day
of the declared war.
It's the address to the Russian people on the Donbass problem on February 21 when Moscow
was going in and it lays out why I believe Trump, what he never
understood, which is that Russia, he wasn't just going into Moscow, I mean, from Russia
into Ukraine for purposes of keeping from weapons.
Have you believed it is an essential part of Russia from the beginning?
This is holy fuck.
I've added, I added some things before the, but it like
the last thing I read is like, you really get dissociative when you read this, trying
to read this out loud. It's this is fucking crazy. Number two, NATO is considerably stronger
than it was when I took office. I put it together. Not only did I reestablish the fact that it was the strongest
alliance in the history of the world, I was able to expand it.
Well, I was in the G7 meeting in Europe.
When I got back, I called the president of Finland, Tom
Finland, big strong man type of guy, you know, when I had.
Met earlier this year with Putin.
He said he wanted to
see the finlandization of NATO.
He wanted those drawings everywhere he said I don't care if it's a sailor, policeman,
strong man, you can get me one type of guy who's no shorter than six foot two, no taller
than six foot five, he taller than six foot five.
He's wearing one of those leather hats. It's like a train conductor hat, but it's made out of patent leather.
It's so shiny.
You could floss your teeth into it.
Not that you would with all that's going on and respect to the world, but we're
going to put Tom of Finland everywhere.
He's going to be everywhere.
And for once we're going to, and this is important.
We're going to have him draw someone.
We ain't white for a change.
That's not how it ends.
He just keeps talking about like in the actual transcript, he keeps talking about
the Finlandization of NATO and he doesn't explain what the fuck
that means at all.
It just ends.
I really like this part of the interview because it's like this is this is very clear that
like, okay, let's make a good case for Biden's leadership of the on the world stage.
And this is a good example of how it is permanently 1963 right before Kennedy got shot in Joe
Biden's brain because like the actual quote is he says, he said he wanted to see the Finlandization
of NATO.
I told him he's not going to get the Finlandization, the NATOization of Finland.
And everyone, he said, I told him he's not, he's going to get not the Finlandization,
the NATOization of Finland.
And everybody thought, including you guys, thought I was crazy.
So he's saying Putin wanted to see the Tomofinlandization of NATO, but instead he got the NATOization
of Tom of Finland.
And everyone thought he was crazy for saying that, including you guys.
I'll never forget that week in 2022 when we were all like, he's not gonna, he's,
there's no way that he's gonna make NATO into Finland or vice versa.
He's crazy.
And then he did it.
I have never wished more.
I wish the animus from the Assassin's Creed was real.
I've never wanted to go inside someone's mind so
bad. It's like, what does he mean? What does this mean? I can usually figure it out. But
like the Finlandization thing is insane. If this was like, if this was 19, like not even the 80s,
if this was 1995, this would be like disqualifying.
Like you would be out of politics if you gave this interview.
I also, I don't know that much about Finland except they have good schools and kids don't
learn to read or go to school until they're eight and there's a city called Espoo, which
is funny to me.
Other than that, and I feel like I know stuff about places, but I couldn't tell you.
I couldn't even venture a guess about anything related to Finland.
Here's a fun finn fact for you. Finnish is one of the only European language that is non-Indo-European in its roots.
It is Uralgic, yes.
And the Basque language. Yeah, and the language have no common anticy like the people
linguists don't know where the fuck it came from people. I
think they're making it. Yeah. Your algae. Yeah. I like I like
the Finnish. I mean, I don't like I don't you know, I don't
agree with what they did in World War Two. They were not
right to do that, but.
I, their general vibe.
I like that they're like, uh, Hey, we're not going to do these wacky Nordic languages, we're going to throw some J's all over the place.
I don't know, man.
I gotta say Brazil needs to grow up.
Speak Spanish, grow up.
That's ridiculous.
None of us are going to take it seriously until you do that. I'm sorry.
Shut up. By the way, I looked up Finlandization, the process whereby a country is induced to favor or
refrain from opposing the interests of a more powerful country, so like every small country,
despite not being politically allied to it, originally with reference to the influence of the former Soviet
Union on its neighbor Finland.
So I guess the issue is that they didn't have a problem with the Soviet Union.
I mean, they did during the winter war.
I guess he means that like NATO, like they bought more jets, maybe it's so,
it's so hard
That's what you're saying about it like he's he's permanently in like the very early cold war yeah Yeah, yeah, it's not even like if it's not even like, you know when his career like
Sort of like middle of his career in the late 80s,
what he gave us Clarence Thomas, it's like, these are things that
Dean Atchison talked about. It's so weird.
No, but I just love it. Like, like, this is his big, this is
his big, like, dunk. He's just like, I bet y'all thought NATO
was gonna get Finland does eyes. But in fact, it's Finland that
got NATO eyes. And y'all thought I was crazy for saying that.
You thought I was talking about my man's Finland?
But I mean, I want to use this like to use
this interview is just like a brief tour through the world of atrocity.
But as long as you're talking about the Russia-Ukraine war,
I did want to highlight a tweet I saw this morning
that's one of the most deranged things I've ever read.
Maybe you've already seen me post about it this morning.
But it comes courtesy of a guy named Nicholas Drummond,
whose bio lists him as a defense industry analyst
and consultant specializing in land warfare,
former British Army infantry offer, UK advisor to KNDS.
Views expressed are my own.
Now I guess maybe I should have read this first, but like it will not shock you to
find out that this guy is a self-proclaimed British infantry officer,
because here's what he says.
The average age of a Ukrainian soldier is 43 years old.
Good.
Old men can't run away quickly,
so they stand their ground, fight to the death,
and then make themselves a cup of coffee.
To which I have to say, I know I'm really getting old
when I am of the average age of a Ukrainian soldier
conscript into their army.
And like, I mean, and this does not augur well
for the cause of Ukrainian nationalism, but like, I mean, think this does not augur well for the cause of Ukrainian nationalism,
but like, I mean, think about how grim that is. Jesus Christ.
Your biggest strength is that you have bad knees.
That's why I can't I can't run. So I have to fight and die and then make coffee. I mean,
like I said, not a surprise that this guy is a British infantry officer, because he
just sees everyone on the planet as potential cannon fodder.
And I guess just like, is LeBron's late in career success giving people an inaccurate
idea of how good 43 year olds are?
I know they didn't make the playoffs.
I know he's putting up good numbers, but this is like the opposite of the IDF with their
like 18 year old colonels.
Now it's like the 40 year the IDF with their 18 year old colonels. Now it's like the guys are fighting with 40 year old guys.
Is the average age.
It's really fucking depressing.
I mean, yeah, Andalou, the Turkish news source, released a picture of guys who probably signed
up to be on home defense or maybe were even press g ganged into this like we've seen with some
people guys on the front lines who at their youngest were in their fifties and like just
the fact that like no one in the American security state even feels like a paying of
guilt over this like that there was a chance to negotiate and possibly end this and they're like, nah, let's keep this rolling forever. When is the war ever gotten worse?
I see nothing but good things in sight. And now it's this, like the thing that they keep pointing to,
even though that like they're like just fucking dipping into their country's reserve of middle-aged men
is that we're training a bunch of Ukrainians
how to pilot really old F-16s in Arizona,
which I wanna point out the F-16 is like,
the Russians have the most data on how to shoot that down
with their air defenses more than like any other plane
in the modern US arsenal.
Even if we get all those Nordic countries to give them those planes, they like there
was a whole fit.
We kicked Turkey out of the F-35 program because they bought F-16s and let Russia test their
air defense systems on them.
So like nothing, nothing is going to like nothing. Nothing is going to change.
It's just going to be this horrible fucking grind of attrition and no, and like not Tony Blinken, not Biden.
No one will really catch any shit from the American press for not
like going to the table when they could have when they, when,
when Ukraine was in a way more advantageous position and we could have avoided this.
Yes. I mean, it sounds grim. It sounds grim, but you know what an advantage is to fighting with the Gen X army? You can't phase them because they all grew up seeing the
Challenger explosion on TV. They also drank from the hose and they
stayed out, you know, they stayed out and played all day in the streets. They rode
their bicycles and skin their knees.
So, uh, I don't think they're likely to be phased by a
column of Russian, uh, heavy armor.
It's not a good sign when someone is trying to justify the worst possible
conditions for like a combat army by being like yeah but like Steve Albini man like it's
just not a good I mean to move on from one like I said just one intractable
disaster to another I feel like should we go back to the the transcript real
quick yes yeah yeah okay time magazine so in Israel obviously a difficult time the transcript real quick. Yes, yeah, yeah. All right, hold on. Okay. Time Magazine.
So, in Israel, obviously, a difficult time there.
What steps are you prepared to take against Israel
now that Netanyahu appears to have crossed your red line
in Raffa, Mr. President?
I'm not gonna speak to that now
because you're just gonna report this before I make before.
I'm in the process of talking with his rallies right now.
So I'm not going to.
Uh, what does that mean?
If I tell you you'll write it, it's not time for you to write it.
It's just, he didn't give an interview.
At least he knows he's in an interview.
That's, that's good for him.
Inviting a reporter.
I know your game time magazine.
You can't get one over old Joe.
Inviting a reporter there.
Oh yeah.
And what answer your questions so you can write them down.
Nice try.
Sure thing.
He's amazing.
Now, as long as we're talking about the Biden's red line in
RAFA, what are the nature of your conversations with the
Israelis right now?
Have you spoken with Bibi?
I've not spoken with Bibi since the...
I've not spoken with B BB since the pack Sunday.
Was it Sunday?
This is one point.
Advisor Ben LeBolt says, yep, Sunday.
I have not.
My team has.
Oh, they're like, who's your, who's your team though?
You haven't, you're not speaking directly with him.
That is a bad sign.
You're like, yeah, Marion accounting is doing it. The guy who makes the coffee someone in the mailroom like you're the
guy who's supposed to be doing it Ben the ball of our balls were son
the case but time to ask him but has he crossed your red line? I'm not gonna respond to that because I'm about to make it anyway
Anyway sounds like he just shit his pants
This is if my four-year-old niece responded to a question that way we'd be like we need to send her to stupid school. This is fucking crazy.
I was just not disqualifying.
How we in 2002 this would be the end of your fucking career.
I'm about to make it.
Anyway that's insane. I'm about to make it. Anyway, that's insane.
I'm about to make it.
OK, well, when he says I'm about to make anyway,
and this is in the context of has Israel crossed your red line in Rafa?
Well, I don't know if you've been paying attention to the news over this past weekend,
but suffice to say, unspeakable atrocities are still occurring.
But this time there are news reports that they were occurring with the direct aid of
US special forces. So it's sort of like in this in this hostage rescue slash massacre
that happened over the weekend. Not only is Biden letting Netanyahu cross his red line,
he's crossing it himself. He's committing, what are our news accounts?
I don't know, read for yourself, but apparently that they use the deconflicted zone in which
they were reconstructing the remnants of his aid peer to land US special forces troops
who then entered a refugee camp under the guise of a humanitarian aid truck.
Think about that
for a second. I mean, the old Trojan Horse maneuver, which is not only cowardly, but
I have to say, cannot be, cannot be separated from what I think is a conscious effort to
make the delivery of any aid into Gaza impossible. Because if every aid truck could just be potentially
like 10 Chris Kiles waiting with itchy trigger fingers, then like delivering
aid of any kind is just literally just murderous. It's just impossible.
I mean, yeah, there's a good reason that that is categorized as a war crime. Like it is,
it's hard to think of the US stooping lower on that type of thing than when they ran sort
of a bogus inoculation campaign to micro like, like,
Oh, right. Yeah.
It's exactly been lauded.
Yeah. This is somehow fucking worse.
Yet just the bar can always go lower
for the US security states.
Well, back to the time magazine interview on this.
It says time asked the president Biden,
more broadly from the intelligence
and the evidence you've seen either currently or in the president Biden, more broadly, from the intelligence and the evidence you've
seen either currently or in the last months, have Israeli forces committed war crimes in
Gaza?
The answer is it's uncertain and has been investigated by the Israelis themselves.
ICC is something that we don't recognize, but one thing is certain people in Gaza, the
Palestinians have suffered greatly for lack of food, water, medicine, gummy
bears, all games, ping pong, gum and baseball cards, gum and baseball cards.
and baseball cards, Nokia, engage Hawker, Hawker Phoenix, 1993.
And a lot of it has to do with just not just to do with his rallies, but what Hamas is doing in Israel as we speak, mass is intimidating the population.
I went over there right after that attack on the Israelis. What they did exceeded everything we've ever seen.
And I've seen a lot tying mothers and daughters together
with a rope and pouring kerosene on it
and burning them to death.
That kind of thing attempted to intimidate
and it is dastardly.
Saying dastardly, it's like they're tying mothers and daughters to train tracks and
twirling their mustache.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah. Well, it's like Biden loves these like completely debunked things that like even
the Israelis that are fit are fake.
But like using that language to describe it like like he goes to Auschwitz and he's
like, this is so mischievous.
Hitler was such a rascal.
Yeah, this is a testament to man's mischief to man.
We believe, we believe there are those who are still alive. I met all the families, but we don't have final proof on who's alive and who's not alive.
And by the way, I've been calling, we should have a ceasefire, period.
And to get those hostages, that's the main reason why we push.
Both the Israelis desperately want to ceasefire in order to get the hostages home and it's
a way to begin to break the momentum and that's why we're pushed so hard and were.
Is our intelligence chief in?
Where is he now?
John Kirby interjects at this point and says he is back sir he was just over in Europe
in Brussels over the weekend and then Time says and whose fault is that the the deal the
ceasefire for hostages has not been consummated is it Hamas or Israel or
both? Hamas could end this tomorrow Hamas could say unintelligible And, and, but the last offer Israel made was very generous in terms of who they'd be willing
to release and what they'd give in return, et cetera.
They're going to send Brett Ratner back to America to face charges.
Can I, can I ask something that might be a little naive?
Why is John Kirby here in the room with him?
Is that normal?
I can answer this.
John Kirby is Biden's comfort character and he needs him to be around when he's feeling
stressed out.
Yeah, he's his emotional support cabinet member.
It for me, I see it as like, um, it's like every bad grandson when they think that a
grandparent only has two years left to live and they're like, Ooh, Oh my God.
I'm just going to live in their house and do their laundry for two years.
And they're going to be so thankful that they like write me into the will.
And then with John Kirby, it's like, he's going to make me president. they write me into the will. And that with John Kirby, it's like he's going to make me president.
And then it's Kirby time. And then all the time.
It's like,
it's like what Alex said, that the best moment in a needs life
is when grandma slips and falls on the stairs. And then you can
be like, I don't have to be employed for the next 10 years.
I'm on full time grandma duty.
Yeah, exactly.
Exactly.
The neat thing where you're like, oh, yeah, I'd love to get a job,
but I'm just taking care of grandma and they're just eating all their food,
speaking up their house with fucking pre rolls, not doing anything,
probably celebrating their fucking death.
That's what John Kirby's doing.
John Kirby is taking all of Biden's dogs and blowing Delta 8 to their ears and
get them high.
The nurse who dressed my leg wound yesterday said that I'm actually really good at being the State Department spokesman. And I don't seem nervous at all.
Link, Lincoln Kirby.
Yeah.
I, I just like, again, the part at the end of the one, two questions ago where
he's like, and that's why we're pushing hard for the, Hey, where's our intelligence.
She's
right.
Where is he?
Yeah.
Are you my son? Like, it's just very, it's, it's, it to be there, right? They're like, where is he? Yeah. Are you my son?
Like, it's just very...
No.
It's a handler, right?
Like, Biden can't use the stove or anything, like, at this point.
Yeah.
This was like, I mean, remember, I think this was like, sort of,
immediately after October 7th, but this was on one of Biden's trips to Israel.
And he gave comments in Air Force One to the
press and there was that image of him speaking to the press looking desiccated.
And like John Kirby, no, no, no, I'm sorry, Anthony Blinken was just over his shoulder
like in the airplane bathroom just with a look of frozen horror on his face.
And he was like right over his shoulder and he knew that once Biden started talking, he
would look bad for him to just interject and be like, you can't say that
or stop talking, Mr. President. But yeah, I think I think all of the sort of the grandpa
minders around him live in a state of perpetual fear and anxiety. Like, for instance, that
the president look, I understand it's an executive job. There's a lot of people who work under
you. And like, otherwise, I wouldn't think it's so damning.
But it certainly does sound bad in the context of like, is America a world power
that the president would be like, where is our chief of intelligence?
Is it where is he? I lost him. What's he doing?
I wouldn't do anything to like
hear Blinken's internal monologue on that tarmac
when he was just looking at Biden in pure horror.
Oh, who's he?
Who's he made? Don't like this.
Looks like another long day of picking cotton.
Oh, we we break.
We're going to be breaking rocks in the yard all day.
You think he's in the movie Life with Eddie Murphy.
Returning to the The Time transcript, Time Magazine,
you mentioned the hunger in Gaza.
Some have alleged that Israel is intentionally using starvation of civilians as a method
of warfare.
Do you think that's the case?
No, I don't think that.
I think they're engaged in activities that is inappropriate.
Once again!
Once again!
Once again!
Young man, inappropriate!
Well, they're not starving millions of civilians. They're engaged in behavior that is simply inappropriate.
They're being naughty.
Both sides, there's rallies and the Rastafarians have to pull their pants up.
No one wants to see that.
You know they do that to show you to show others that they're gay in prison.
That's why it was invented.
No, I think it's that is when I went over immediately after the Hamas brutal
attack, I said then, and it became public.
I said, don't make the same mistake we did after bin Laden.
Don't try the idea of occupying.
Good advice. after bin Laden don't try the idea of occupying Afghanistan.
Good advice.
Israel is I'm sure Israel was like, all right, let's we're going to invade Afghanistan right after October 7th.
Wait, that's a bad idea.
Okay.
We're calling it off the deal that you had nuclear arsenals in Iran
that were being, I mean, in Iraq,
that were being generated, simply not true.
And it led to endless wars.
They were not true.
Don't make the mistakes we made.
And they're making that mistake.
I think, excuse my voice, I apologize. Okay.
Why?
I apologize.
I can try to parse this.
I dearly apologize.
What the fuck?
So he's saying, in the context of an interview
where just not even one paragraph earlier,
he said he had seen videos of a mother and daughter
being tied up and lit on fire.
He's saying, don't make the mistake we did of believing a bunch of dumb shit and then
occupying a country in an endless war that was a mistake.
Sorry about my voice.
Yeah.
I apologize.
I apologize.
This is so fucking, like everything is degenerated so fucking bad.
This would end your career if you were like, I don't know, a late night host in 1999.
Like you could you like do.
This is so far.
This would end your career if you were a boxer.
The Nevada gaming commission sanctioned about if your pregame.
If your pre fight interview, you were talking like this.
They wouldn't even hold this on a barge in international waters
if you were giving answers like this to a fight doctor.
Even Dana White would be like, all right, you can't fight. This is fucking insane.
I know we glossed over it a little bit earlier, but in the question about is Israel committing war crimes, Joe Biden did say, we don't recognize the ICC.
Which is, that's pretty, I know he's saying we don't,
I think he's trying to say we don't recognize
their judgment in this case, but of course
we still recognize them, you know,
if it's a Serbian or an African world, in this case.
But for him to just say, we don't recognize the ICC, an institution that like
we literally created and maintained.
Like I mean, yeah, like I, God, this will be three elections in a row where both candidates
are the only people that could lose to one another.
Like both candidates are the worst fucking candidates in history
for evolving reasons. And like I didn't think things could get worse than last time, but
I didn't think things could get worse than 2016. This could be the worst election in
American history. Like how does anyone vote in this election? How do you not just kill
yourself in the booth? They should have another lever to pull for suicide booth.
Yeah.
If more people commit suicide, then vote, then we agree to dissolve the country.
Like please, something like that.
I will kill myself in the booth if it means that that's an option
Throw my headphones up. I'm going dumb in the booth for this one
Okay, so it says here This after he says don't make the mistakes we made so time magazine says do you have an agreement from all the other parties to?
This multi-package deal both the power multi-part package of deals that would deliver that in Israel, in the region other than Bibi.
Is Bibi the only thing standing in the way of that?
I got to be careful because you're going to print this before the article comes out.
And I'm in the process of negotiating a lot of that.
You're going to print this before the article comes out?
What does that?
Hey, everyone, I know that I made a whole interview
with Biden, but we've decided to print it before the article comes out.
Well, you need teasers.
I'm leaking.
You need a preview. You need teasers.
But the question asked, what the question essentially asked is like, do you have a
negotiating partner in the prime minister of Israel, Benjamin
Netanyahu? And his answer to that is I'm in the process of negotiating that. I mean, is
he doing it too?
Yeah.
He's doing a coup, but I have to be careful not to tell you that I'm doing it because
you're going to print it before the article comes out.
You're going to print it before the article comes out.
I know you're fucking game.
All right. I'm going to the end of my highlighted bits that I chose from this, but it says here, the last two years of presidents, two term presidents tenure are usually focused on foreign affairs. You are 81 years old and would be 86 by the time you left office large majorities of Americans including the in the Democratic
Party tell pollsters they think you were too old to leave
could you really do this job as an 85 year old man I can do it
better than anybody you know you're looking at me I can take
you to a Time Magazine journalist who's asking him if 85
is too old to be running the country.
He says, I could do it better than anyone you know, and I can take you to right now
if you guys want to arm wrestle.
It's so Dan Quinn.
I'm busy.
Wow. And win. Like, it's, I'm busy. I really think that this journalist failed
on a basic matter of journalism
by not taking the president up on that offer.
Like the fact that the president challenges you to a fight
in response to a question about his age,
I feel like you have to be like,
oh, all right, well, I guess we need to settle this
once and for all.
Are you old enough to fight a time journalist? Imagine that happened.
Imagine you're like you're like a like a sort of like millennial
cusper journalist doing this article and you're like, OK, fine, we'll fight.
And you just deck him and he falls in a really bad way.
And you're like, oh, shit.
And you somehow escape the White House.
You somehow escape the White House.
You escape the Marines.
You escape the Secret Service. You somehow escape the White House. You escape the Marines. You escape the Secret Service.
Your Uber's already waiting for you.
You're in the taxi with Maria Villalobos from Pulp Fiction
asking you, what does it feel like to kill a man?
You're in the taxi.
You get back to the hotel, and then you have like two missed
calls from your editor.
And you're like, oh, fuck.
Oh, fuck.
And you call them back, and you're like, oh, no, oh, fuck. And you call them back and you're like, oh, no, it went great.
Nothing happened.
By the way, could you not print the article until it comes out?
Don't print this article before it comes out.
That's the most important thing.
We can't do that.
I think it's possible that Biden would have like an advantage because he'd want to fight
in that like 1950s New York gangs way where they like they like tie one arm by their
wrist together and then they have blades in the other arm.
Yeah, he would fight he would he would fight and go down like
Liam Neeson gangs of New York.
I'll take anybody jack but no no zip guns. Got to make that clear.
But like, does the Secret Service have a protocol in place where the president can order them
to stand down, like at the end of Lethal Weapon where Gary Busey and Mel Gibson fight on Muir
Taz front yard?
And then like, they surrounded by LAPD officers with guns.
And Danny Glover is like, no, this is between them.
Let them finish it.
That would be like, that would be really cool.
But like the secret service is too lame
to have like a protocol like that.
That's something that would happen
in the seminal, Jet Li classic hero, but not in America.
I think like eight Botoxes ago, Putin may have tried that move,
but now ever since he got his eighth baselift and became a COVID- COVID sufferer. COVID hawk. Yeah.
Ever since he busted out that long table and he got long COVID, he's not doing that anymore.
But I think if you're the president, they have to let you do that.
Even if Joe Biden would die instantly, even to the punch of a journalist.
I don't know.
I feel like it's probably one of the rules where they have to break it up that was put
into place during Joe Biden's administration.
Just because they knew he was going to try to start fights.
They're like, at some point, you know, Papi's going to get scrappy.
We got to have like a contingency plan for when he does the finger gun thing from Gran
Torino. Listen, pussy. Shut up. plan for when he does the, uh, the, the finger gun thing from Grantor Reno.
Listen, pussy shut up.
I'm representing when you know, but the boat people, Jack, they're
humong, I thought they were bad neighbors.
What are you, what are you Jacks doing?
All right, getting to the end here.
He says, Time Magazine says, do you consider not running again because of your age?
No, I didn't.
Sorry.
And what do you say to Americans who are worried about it?
Watch me.
Look, name me a president that's gotten as much done as I've gotten
done in my first three and a half years.
When all you wrote in time magazine, I couldn't get any of it done.
When you told me there's no pay, no way, no way he can get a trillion plus
dollar bill done in terms of to deal with infrastructure where there's no way he
gets $268 billion for dealing with the environment where there's no way I could get the legislation
passed on.
I remember when I was headed to Taiwan, excuse me, to South Korea, to reclaim the chips industry
that we had gotten 86, 865 billion in private sector investment, private sector investments
since I've been in.
Name me a president who's done that.
Great point.
He's bringing back the American chips industry.
I, you know, sold through a South Korean conglomerate and they're bringing back
the crab chips, the American.
I love it.
Like, like the journalist, the journalist was nice enough to just completely glide
past the fact that Biden challenged him to a fist fight and was like, okay, uh,
let's talk about some of your accomplishments.
But he's throwing, but he's trying to throw Biden like a life wrap and Biden basically just takes out a 38 and shoots it. He's like, no, I'll drown. Let me tell you about when I went to the
South Siam and I rescued all the kids. Back when I was an Indochine.
Back when I was an Indochine. Amber shared this in the chat.
Felix, do you see this?
It's a question about...
Okay.
All right.
So it begins, but Mr. President, won't your newly announced tariffs raise the price on
American consumers?
No, because here's the deal.
There's a difference. I made it clear to Putin from the very beginning that we're not engaging in, for example, Trump
wants a 110% tariff on everything.
That will raise the price of everything in America.
Editor's note, Biden appeared to be in Xi here, not Putin.
What I'm talking about.
Being very generous.
Yeah, this is one of the most generous interviews
I've ever seen.
This is a really nice guy.
Yeah, like, holy sh-
I don't, I never want to see any of the Biden people
say the media is out for them ever again after this.
Yeah.
Oh my God, yeah.
They are trying to be in the tank for you,
but you're literally too incompetent for that to be the case. They physically cannot be
in the tank for you. It's too fucked up. And there is no the president of the United States
appeared to confuse Russia and China. But after after the editors noted continues up,
what I'm talking about, I said we're gonna play by the same rules
Tell me if I want to if an American corporation wants to invest in China
When he has to give 50% ownership 51% ownership to a Chinese operator and that goes from there
And I said so you're gonna do that to us
And I said, so you're going to do that to us? We're going to do the same thing if you want to invest here.
We're not going to put a tariff, not putting a tariff on.
We're just saying if you want to do that, well, we're going to do that.
And you cannot change the market in a way where you flood the market by
ignore all Chinese government subsidies to undercut their ability as to deal with electric vehicles.
And we're not going to put up with it.
That's the thing we talked about.
And that's what we're here talking about.
We're not talking about tariffs across the board.
Slam dunk, posterized, and backboard shattered.
There's a part where they say unintelligible in there.
I feel bad, I feel like this is like, you know,
when we get the director's cut,
that unintelligible will be a scene
that we really wish was in the original.
I interpreted it as him just like,
literally saying something on it,
just making sounds, but like director's
cut, like seeing how in the tank the reporter is, it could have been something insane.
You're right.
Like he might have taken it out just to save his ass.
He's like, I didn't hear that.
I didn't hear that.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And we know that the Chinese, the Chinese, they can turn into a tiger, whatever they
want.
The thing about the celestial races, is that they love gambling they love the number
eight they can't get enough of it.
Double happiness Jack they can't stop gambling on electric cars we're not going to stand
for it.
And I told I told Fu Manchu you don't see me going over there putting on your hat, spitting and gambling, smoking
a cigarette, made out of wet paper. You try to put me in the hat. Don't come around and
turn that into a baseball cap. You come over here and try to wear our hats. Well, I'll
tell you what. Some of you jacks may have gone over the moon and turned to a jackrabbit, but when it comes turn for our.
That's when you know that I know where's my wife.
She's in Belgium, sir.
That's right.
Well, that's what I thought.
Yeah, I think you have a good impression of the state of the Biden White House.
But, you know, I just like I said, I've got my little man was talking to me
and he's saying Biden wins re-election by losing the popular vote and winning the electoral college.
I know and German has already put his chips down on that on that scenario being the most likely.
So I'm riding with Josh
I just got a feeling I think I think so. I mean you bring in
These Trump is really bring it like the batteries shark thing sinking boat like shark batteries
That's the that's the hit of summer
I say what would happen if the boat sank from its That's the hit of the summer.
I say what would happen if the boat sank from its weight and you're in the boat and you
have this tremendously powerful battery and the battery is now underwater and there's
a shark that's approximately 10 yards over there. By the way, a lot of shark attacks
lately. Do you notice that? A lot of shark. So there's a shark 10 yards away from the boat.
10 yards or here.
Do I get electrocuted if the boat is sinking,
water goes over the battery, the boat is sinking?
Do I stay on top of the boat and get electrocuted?
Or do I jump over by the shark and not get electrocuted?
Because I will tell you, he didn't know the answer.
He said, you know, nobody's ever asked me that me that question I said I think it's a good question I
think there's a lot of electric current coming through that water but you know
what I do if there was a shark or you get electrocuted I'll take electrocution
every single time I'm not getting near the shark I love that he's still going in
on sharks it's like his he's never been. He's never been in the ocean. This man has never been here.
That's cool.
Well, now we know why he doesn't want to risk it.
I love what I the
first thing I ever saw him say about sharks.
It was like before even the
Obama birth certificate stuff
was before he got into that.
It was in like 2009.
He was like back when he was like pretending
he like supported universal health care. He was like, back when he was like pretending he like supported universal healthcare,
he was like, sorry folks, I'm just not a fan of sharks.
Don't worry about them.
They'll be around long after we're gone.
Which I thought, what a great line.
Yeah, I really like it, yeah.
They were here before, they'll be there after.
I wonder if there's like any evangelicals who like won't vote for him because he said that because his shark cosmology runs
Sharks have been here exactly as long as humanity has
And when Christ Christ comes back they're gone just like we are
Sharks will not ascend in the fucking rapture.
I'm into like Unitarian cosmology,
where like, you know, there's like a pet heaven
and there's like a, you know, like heaven is like a Montessori
school, basically.
Everyone can get in.
Well, in his recent comments about would he
choose to be electrocuted by the battery in
a sinking yacht or be potentially killed by a shark and he said I'm going with electrocution
every time in one of his many digressions.
And by the way, I don't think I'd like to, what makes those comments even funnier is
that he was doing that, he was making those comments at a rally where it was probably
110 degrees outside. So I think like there was at least like three fatalities in the audience from heat stroke.
He was just, he was like in these endless digressions where he starts talking about
sharks and he goes, and he's referring to they like the shark scientists who want you to believe
sharks are friendly. He goes, oh, like just the other week, you know, take a bite out of some
young girl. But they say, they say, oh, the sharks, they don't know what they're doing.
They thought it was just food, but it wasn't for them.
And then they go where they know what they're doing.
Like he's like, you know, people are at home by big shark.
There are no angels.
There are no angels, folks.
You know, they sung in the church youth group,
but they were out there biting people. They were surfing one over again.
They killed them.
To go back to general election prognostications, it is gun to my head.
I have to say that Biden winning the popular vote either very narrowly or not at all while edging out in the battleground
states.
That's like, like if I had to pick right now, but it should like the thing that makes this
so hard, like I said, is that they are like, you could not design two worse candidates.
This is like, this is the worst possible case for the Trump candidacy
too, even with Biden being as incredibly fucking unpopular as he is.
Because like, again, you know, people, there are so many idiotic narratives
about 2016, uh, that people love.
But the thing that no one wants to admit is that Trump won because
independent voters saw him as more moderate than Hillary.
That was the only reason he was able to edge out a victory.
And that like, who is going to think that anymore?
You know, at least on the independent side and not only that he's a known
quantity and there've been four years of him talking
exclusively about a loss, which is just like that's poison. And that, you know, not even bringing up
like the conviction, which I like obviously for his base doesn't mean anything. But I think it moves a very non significant block of independence.
And with Biden, I don't like Woodrow Wilson was more coherent than this at the end.
Ronald Reagan was.
I just like, I cannot.
How does this happen?
How the fuck does this happen?
How?
It's what happens when too many Rubicons are crossed, okay?
Yeah.
These rivers are everywhere.
We're crossing them willy nilly and now we're in the real terminal stages of empire.
Okay?
Yeah.
So if you see a Rubicon, just leave it alone.
They did a much better job of hiding Reagan.
Like they like Biden has more yard time. They did a much better job of hiding Reagan.
Biden has more yard time.
I don't know why they don't do...
I know they have to trot him out every once in a while and they do kind of...
They keep him a little close to the vest, but I don't know.
He's a little too free range.
But I don't know. I think you're probably right, Will.
It's like second term Reagan, the Republicans, they had a really strong defense.
So all he had to do was just get in there, hand the ball off, maybe make a couple passes.
But Biden, man, they're asking him to go out there and win the game.
And it's looking rough right now.
It's looking rough. But keep in mind looking rough, but keep in mind who they're
playing against.
I don't see how anyone can be supremely confident in any type of Republican victory after the
off-year elections, the midterms, everything that we've seen. They have underperformed to an insane degree, like a historic degree, against a party led
by one of the most unpopular presidents we've ever seen in the modern era.
But yeah, no, it's just this is, I don't know, like I don't even want to say it can't get
worse than this because it always does.
Yeah, I just I want to see what that will what that what fruit that will bear in the future.
How can we go lower than this? Will it be, you know, fucking Ron DeSantis versus Gavin Newsome
after they both experienced a plane crash that robbed them both of the ability
to speak. Who knows?
Greetings, lie ahead.
There's no rule that says a dog can't be president.
Yeah, they're going to hear about it.
The future is so bright, we got to wear shades, but listeners, please, and I cannot stress
this enough, do not listen to this episode until it is out, please.
Yes, no, yes.
Yes.
This is super fucking important.
If you guys, if you guys print this
before the episode comes out,
well, like, kiss democracy goodbye.
We can take you.
We can take you.
Don't believe us, just watch.
We will go, we will go all the way We can take you. We can take you. Don't believe us, just watch.
We will go all the way to Nippon and we're going to put all the money on the chips.
Alright, let's wrap it up there for today, folks.
That was your Choppo Trap House from Monday, July, June 10th, 2024.
Alright, until the next time, talk to you again soon.
Bye bye. Bye. When the world it seems
That the fall seems so