Chapo Trap House - 854 - Medbed Bugs feat. Alex Nichols (7/29/24)

Episode Date: July 30, 2024

Felix and Alex provide some Olympics commentary by reviewing the last few Assassin’s Creed games. Plus, a return of our Animal News segment with a discussion of how much screen time captive gorillas should get. Then: Republicans get “weird,” Megyn Kelly critiques Kamala’s rise to power, Trump seems like he’s running out of gas, and Israel gets a January 6 by people demanding their soldiers’ freedom to commit sexual violence. Finally, a reading series on the phenomenon of “medbeds” and the people who hope Trump will unleash unlimited free space healing technology. Get your fresh merch restocks at: https://chapotraphouse.store/

Thank you all. Have a good time with your Bitcoin and your crypto and everything else that you're playing with. Greetings everybody, it's Monday July 29th. This is your Chopo coming at you. I hope everyone had a good weekend and a great Olympics weekend. That's right. It's everyone's favorite Luciferian spectacle of Saturnalia and defravity, the Olympics, team USA, number one.

I love the Olympics because every four years I'm reminded of countries that I didn't use to hate, but now I do. Like Australia, they've got to be stopped. I'm sick of their arrogance in the swimming pool. Australia, you were on notice. We are canceling the AUKUS security agreement because of your metal hogging behavior in the pool. I think someone in Australia,

they should just take an AR-15 and just let their anger out. Why doesn't that ever happen down there? They never get their comeuppance. But yeah, no, my favorite thing about the Olympics this year has been the reaction to the opening ceremony on a scale of one to ten, zero being godly, ten being satanic. Where were we? Where are we? Where are we reading this opening ceremony?

Felix, I was thinking of you because it did feature the Assassin's Creed guy. And I know your feelings on Ubisoft and that franchise. So yeah, the worst thing France has ever done in history. Ubisoft since 2012. Yeah, they really I I was disappointed. I mean, obviously they're going to have some, you know, Ubisoft there because that's, um, you know, that's one of their big conglomerates. But why didn't they honor the real auteur of French video game making David Cage? Why wasn't there a Detroit become human segment in the intro show? Why wasn't Jesse Williams there, uh, being the D-Ray of androids as he was in that game. I was very disappointed.

Well, you know, I mean, it's probably because it's a Detroit based Android simulator founded by the French. Hey, only one Assassin's Creed game takes place in France. Yeah, unity. Yeah, unity. And the rest of them, you know, they're in America They have like eight in Italy. There's one here on in the Ottoman Empire one That's one of the last good ones. What a new one. No, no, no, no, that was one that came out in like 2012 I think really not a really long day. Yeah

Revelation. Oh, okay. It was the last one before they did the America one I missed that one. My favorite one was the last one before they did the America one. I miss that one. My favorite one is the Caribbean one when you're a pirate. Yeah, that one's pretty good. They brought back the boat mechanics for the Greece one, but it's not quite the same. The newer ones are just horrible. They instituted like a Witcher combat system.

It used to be that even those guys that are paralyzed and have to play games with their tongues could beat these games because all you have to do is just press the counter button. But they're like, no, that's bad. Every game should be like the Witcher 3. And they make everyone level up. Yeah, I'm sick of leveling up. Every game has leveling up. I didn't beat the one with the Viking one because they keep leveling up your enemies and it's the same thing over and over again. And you would think like clearing out the same village

a 16th time, they would make it a little easier, but it's the same thing, but they keep scaling up the difficulty. Like that's the point of progressing in a game, so you can genocide trash mobs. That's like one of the rewards. Yeah. So you could kill like, you know.

Native British people. Yeah, they take that away from you instead of designing interesting enemies I really yeah, it really should have done Detroit become human. That's a great game. They should do Assassin's Creed Detroit Yeah, but like when it was first founded like being a fur trader Yeah, I guess they kind of already did that with America. There was the American but they did they do it in France They could do it like a new France version They should do it in like this sort of Motown area, a sort of era of Detroit, you know, but but instead of killing people, you got to put out, you know,

it's a rhythm game. It's a rhythm. It's Assassin's Creed, but it's a rhythm game. And you can play as like Barry Gordy. Yeah, they can have LMFAO, his son and grandson. Oh, yeah. How about yeah. A very a Barry Gordy like tower defense game

where you're fighting against lawsuits and you can issue NDAs. Yeah. The final boss is Diana Ross. She serves you divorce papers. You have to just unload into her. And LMFAO are like special units you can use. Yeah, they're your summons. Yeah. Summoning your grandson. Oh, but no, I have been enjoying the

the rather overheated reaction to the French Olympics opening ceremony. It's just like, what do people expect? It's France. Like, it's they're the host country. They get to do their thing for the Olympic opening ceremony. So, yeah, it was going to be weird and gay. But like, that's France. What do you what do you want from them? And like, all the Americans who are getting angry about the imagery of Marie Antoinette being beheaded. I'm sorry, what is

killing royalty a bad thing now? Like if if after the American Revolution, if we had chopped off George III's head, like wouldn't we celebrate that? Not the loyalists. There were a lot of loyalists back then and there still are. We never really got rid loyalists. There were a lot of loyalists back then and there still are We never really got rid of them. We didn't de loyalistify America after the revolution and we should have we should have shipped them all back You don't like it go back over there. Are you one of you want to live under the king leave? I really this one really annoyed me because I don't know just a lot of Johnny come lately to

Christianity lately yeah like Elon Musk pretending to be a god guy is so like calm he's still got the Baphomet costume in his avatar yeah you literally dressed up as one of the devil's friends subordinates who's Baphomet what does he do I think he is relationship to's his relationship to... He's a demon. A grandson. He's his grandson that he summons. Oh, he's L-M-F-A-O. Yeah, yeah. Barry Gordy is sort of the devil of music.

Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. I'm sexy and I know it. Yeah, so the Olympics, moving on, I wanted to, I wanted to start out today, Felix, I have some ape news for you. And I wanted to start, moving on, I wanted to start out today, Felix. I have some ape news for you. And I wanted to start, you know, look at the thing, look at some of the issues

facing apes today, and this comes courtesy of the Wall Street Journal. Headline is, zoo's new dilemma, gorillas and screen time. And the article begins, bearing the gorilla's image as he pulled out his phone. Akuba stood on all fours and began watching videos of himself and other gorillas. He is really watching. I wonder what he's thinking, said Cecilia Lee, a visitor from Orange County. Anything that brings us together is fascinating. Akuba isn't the only gorilla enthralled with devices. Across North America, zoos have grappled with and sometimes embraced primates taking an interest in screen time.

In Louisville, Kentucky, a 27-year-old gorilla named Jelani has been enamored with phones for years, flicking his finger or tapping the glass when he's ready for a visitor to swipe to the next shot. At the Toronto Zoo, keepers have hung signs to dissuade showing screens to gorillas, citing disruption to their family dynamic. Now, Felix, as one of America's number one great ape supporters, I'm curious on where you fall on giving screen time to gorillas

or showing gorillas images of other gorillas or maybe just content on your phone. Well, I don't know. I'm against giving any developing organism, whether it's like a toddler or one of nature's great apes, any type of tablet. I think tablets are really bad. They've set old people back a lot.

They already know how to read. They just have a great remedializing effect. But a desktop setup, I think, would be very nice for a gorilla. I do believe that. Yeah. When was the last time gorillas evolved? Like, um, 10 million years ago? It's kind of-

Roughly around the time we showed up. Right. They're kind of not doing a lot. So like maybe a desktop would, um, put some fire under underneath them, you know? They do know how to do math. In Japan, they have them do math. And I'm not making a racist joke. They do know how to do math. In Japan, they have them do math. And I'm not making a racist joke. They do have them press the numbers.

I don't even know what the racist joke would be there. Like, I that would be a very confusing racist joke. Well, the girl is over there. They like math, too. And they also have hippocamores and culture transmits across species. Going on here, it says, some see the trend of gorillas watching phone videos as the latest human indignity, foisted upon the endangered gentle giants, would spend most of their time in

the wild eating vegetation. I get that people want that sort of connection, said Beth Armstrong, a conservationist who helped shape a pioneering gorilla program at the Columbus Zoo beginning in the 1980s. But the reality is what does it do for the gorilla? She wishes people would put down their phones and learn from watching the animals, be it parenting tips or how to navigate a tough social dynamic. What parenting tips do you think people are learning from gorillas? I mean, from what I've seen like-

Don't let her die, babe. Throw hay at your son. Yeah. That from what I'm seeing, like, die, bait, as you said. Throw hay at your son. Yeah. That's what I've seen. Throw poop. Yeah, throw poop, throw hay at your son, pull their ear really hard, they love doing that. I really don't think the two things translate.

Like, I'm as big of a gorilla fan as anyone, but I really would not advise most people to start living their life like a gorilla. I don't think most people are really equipped for that. What are they too busy doing that they can't use their phone? Well, you know, like- I get why you wouldn't let a kid use a phone because it's like their brain is developing

and they're gonna have to go to high school and go to college and they're gonna have to do all this stuff and learn to be a human being. But the gorillas just get to be in there. They just get to be in that same room and they do the same shit and someone gives them food and they don't have to go anywhere or do anything. So it's like, they're already completely dependent.

They're already not in the wild. And also being in the wild probably sucks. It's probably pretty boring. It's like the gorilla equivalent of going to work. Having to like, having to fight off other troops and shit. Having to like, having to fight off other troops and shit? Having to like, having to worry about like, uh, uh, bush meat hunters and all that shit? Yeah. Yeah, you're like, oh, leaves again.

Great. Yeah, leaves again. Not a bunch of delicious apples. They're not giving me edible arrangements every day. And then letting me watch Family Guy clips with uh, with uh, sewer surfers or whatever. On the bottom. Well, you know, Alex, like, it says here like, some view this as just, uh, like, another guy clips with us sewer surfers or whatever. Alex, like it says here, like some some view this as just like another indignity foisted upon these majestic creatures by human beings. Like, they're already in the zoo being gawked at by

people from Columbus, Ohio. Like, they're famous. Yeah, they get to be famous. I would rather be one of the famous gorillas in the pen who gets free food than one of the ones in the Congo. I don't want to be in the Congo. In the mist? I don't want to be in the mist. Get me out of there.

I can't see shit. The view distance, the draw distance is turned all the way down in the mist, but in the zoo, you can see for miles. Yeah, you can see photos of yourself on other people's phones. I like the detail about them tapping the glass when they get bored with whatever they're looking at. They're like, no, go to the next video. I want to say I've seen that cat before.

Yep, I've seen that. Why are they allowed to tap the glass? Why isn't there a sign telling them not to do it? They're so smart. Yeah, but this got me thinking. What online content would you think would be beneficial? What online content would you expose apes to? If anything? Because I have something in mind and I'm curious to your thoughts.

I don't know, maybe like, um, Demonious X? See if they're capable of making fun of them. Like an entry level figure like Demonious X? Yeah, like Coco the gorilla signing gorilla signing like my cage much cleaner. My idea for the for online content that I'd like to share with apes, I'd like to share with any animal, I'd like to get their reaction to it. We talked a bit about it on last episode, but Lord Lord Almighty, he has blessed us. He's back.

I'm talking about Club Random, and I think we need to expose apes to Bill Maher's podcast. And more specifically, the recent episode he did with the Hawk Two Girl. I mean, Felix, I know you're your America's number one club random head. Please, sir, have you watched the Hawk Two Girl? Of course. Of course I have. It's amazing. And you said in the last episode that it's like outsider art. And this one really was like encapsulated that perfectly

Well anytime bill has on any type of woman like the two the two best episode types are like woman like woman under the age of like 80 and A celebrity that Bill Maher hates like the rain Wilson episode is very good for that reason because like bill will always have on like a celebrity who wrote a book about mindfulness and be like don't don't you think it's not working because you're depressed but um a woman episode we've seen that before the Bella Thorne episode obviously quite famous uh for how funny it is. But this one was, he reached new heights

of stilted conversation in this one, I thought. I like the part where he doesn't know what white claws are and he goes, what are you drinking? And the girl goes, white claws. And he goes, what? About seven times. And then he's like, oh, ha, ha, ha. Because he's like 70, he's a 70 year old man.

I liked when there was a lull in the, like Bill Maher obviously, like he does with all of his young woman guests, he calls her hot in like a very old way where he's like, the whole world loves a pretty girl. Like one of those old guy ways to flirt with a girl. But after that kind of goes nowhere, he goes, were a lot of people you know addicted to Oxycontin?

The Chinese just brought back a rock from the dark side of the moon? What? The Chinese sent a probe up to the moon and they brought back a rock from the dark side of the moon, which we had never done. Maybe they'll smoke it. I know what I'm saying. Moon dust, actual moon dust. Why?

Is that a thing, moon dust? I don't know. Oh. But it's actually off the moon now. Did you see a lot of opioid abuse in your area of, you know, that's the part of the country that. Oh, thank you. I don't know. I don't pay attention. Yeah, yeah. That was the moment that I really that I wanted to zero in on because like, he's trying to tell her that China just brought back moon rocks from the dark side of the moon and was getting nowhere with it. She was just like, yeah, they should smoke them moon rocks or whatever.

And he's like, can't do anything with that. And he just pauses and goes, are there a lot of people where you're from addicted to oxy? Yeah. She was like, not really. She's like, I know. Yeah. Like I think she's from the suburbs. Talk about Riffer's Paradise. It's like it's like being 21 and bringing a girl home

and then she talks to your dad for like 10 minutes like you go in the other room to do something and then you Come back and she's like like her her pupils are all wide and she's like, I want to go home And you just look at your dad you're like what did what were you talking about? I don't know Yeah And you just look at your dad, you're like, what were you talking about? I don't know. Yeah, CharlieStyledave on Twitter said that, it's really funny to watch these episodes, but imagine that Bill Maher, without fail, has fucked every single woman he's had on. Like somehow he's killing it.

And I think that adds a lot to it. Just somehow this is working. These very weird, like very weird weird stilted dated like he asked him about like threes company All his references are from like 50 years ago He'll always ask like a vaguely insulting question like if everyone they know is addicted to heroin But somehow he's just he's he's fucking all these women. And in the year 4000, 5% of the population will be able to trace their ancestry to Bill Maher and one of any of the women who are on Club Random.

I also liked it like I think at the beginning of the episode where he pitched it like, you know, she had been sort of had the mantle of fame and celebrity placed on her by the universe and that that's a difficult thing to deal with. And he's going to give her pointers on how to like navigate the world of showbiz success. And like, you know, by doing so, like just smoke a lot of weed. Just yeah, and just just take it easy. Well, that also is like, that was a great moment because like Bill is so old that he thinks like the celebrity making process is still like it was in 1984. Like you can get you get discovered by by doing something and then it doesn't matter

what you got discovered by you. You just need to parlay that into like a development deal and then get a sitcom and then be in a movie. He doesn't realize that there have been like 80,000 internet celebrities that like they blow up, they sell a like some fake cryptocurrency and then who is the Vinny from a hometown gets them in the celebrity boxing match? Oh yeah. They have to be in a van with Van Margera.

Yeah, that's the trajectory. There's no, like you don't like skyrocket into celebrity for there's no like right move you can make. That's it. You've got like a month where you, you know, you're doing a bunch of just humiliating things, but for like slightly more money and then you're gone. What happened to this bagel guy?

Would Bill Barr tell this to the bagel boss guy? Listen, you're really hot and you have a special moment here. Yeah. She's like uniquely long lasting for an internet celebrity like that. Like usually things like that don't last longer than like an hour. Someone just saying something crazy or someone getting interviewed on TikTok. Like all the people on the channel 5 interviews, like half of them have funnier stuff than that or crazier stuff and it doesn't go viral. But even then, even at that level, you still can't really get anywhere.

Like maybe she can get on The Simpsons in four years, but I don't know if you'd even be paid for that. Like I don't know if the Planet of the Base guy got paid by The Simpsons. I don't know if the planet of the base guy got paid by the Simpsons. I don't know. It might be done by AI. I don't know if there are humans involved. Yeah. Well, seeing Bill Maher shine just makes me think that there are probably, most of the apes in the world aren't familiar with Club Random or Bill Maher.

And I'd like that to change. So, if you know someone at the Columbus Zoo who can expose apes to maybe let the Richard Dreyfuss episode, because I think they could learn a lot from Richard Dreyfuss, like how to sit and just you know, just sort of how to how to be Well, they're trying to keep apes from doing one of the things Richard Dreyfuss talks about on that episode. Namely, incest. They really don't want the Apes to do that.

That would be bad. That's a very, the Richard Dreyfus one is one of the, I think the strangest interview I've ever seen in my life. I don't know if you've seen that one. But Richard Dreyfus, not even deep into the episode, a couple minutes in, basically confesses his incest fantasies to Bill. And Bill is like, Bill's trying to do the thing where he talks about like, you know,

jerking off to celebrities when they were young. But Richard Dreyfus just won't stop. He's like, yeah, but I've never done it, but like I would jack off to my mom and sister a lot. And Bill is horrified. But he just has to keep going. It's weird that his son turned out so weird. You know, I wouldn't expect that.

I really would. Growing up here in your dad be like, man, I want to fuck your grandma and your aunt and your other. Yeah, I remember I remember Bill Maher had Richard Dreyfuss on real time, like years ago, and he was like trying to get anything out of Richard. This was like during the Bush administration and he was trying to like he was trying to juice something out of Richard Dreyfuss. And then Richard got very frustrated at one point and just said, all of our problems are because because we don't see civics anymore and we can't fix any of these problems until we learn about civics again. I miss that. People don't say that anymore. Yeah, it is a very old guy answer, but I always wonder like why they're so confident in that. Like how do they know? Like weren't all Richard Dreyfuss's kids like already in college at that point?

They didn't study enough of the Constitution in high school. And that's why Ben is the way he is. And the people who study the Constitution, those are the craziest people. Yeah, that's like the federal society. Those are like the people with the fringe on the flag, like those people. Moving on to a topic that's been very much in the political news this week, that's very much, I think, adjacent to our previous conversation. Let's talk about how one word, one word has upended the presidential

election and the political party system in this country. And that word is weird. I don't think Kamala Harris is going to pick anyone as weird and creepy as JD Vance. Frankly, JD Vance, just dumb Vance, is pretty weird. It's not just a weird style that he brings, it's that this leads to weird policies. They're just weird. Donald Trump and his weirdo running mate. More extreme, more weird, more erratic. The agenda, the way they talk to people, the way they address people. It is bizarre. It's weird. It is weird.

Well, it's just plain weird. And this is the word that the Democrats have sort of gelled on as being their kind of pitch for reelection. And it's Donald Trump and JD Vance and the Republican party in general are weird. Now, I will say that this comes sort of congruent with, I think, the now thoroughly dead horse of JD Vance fucking a couch, which is like, look, I enjoy him being humiliated, but there's something about the little bit forced about that, or it just wasn't all that funny to

me. Because like, there are so many other things about JD Vance that are true, and just like, you know, like the way he looks, the way he sounds, and the things he says, whereas like the couch fucking thing, it just, it struck me as trying a little too hard. But that being said, the right wing are there till they're there, they are pressed right now by being called weird. And you're seeing it in some of the reactions to being called weird that I want to highlight here.

There's a couple ones. Felix, I know you saw this one. This was one JD defender who said, at JD Vance should go on the offense and double down in response to the couch trolling. He should tweet out something like, what a great day to be a handsome, successful white man. Or, all my enemies are ugly. Crazy how that happens. Then watch his critics go insane.

Yeah. He should thank the Democrats for all the views. are ugly crazy how that happens then watch his critics go insane yeah he should he should thank the democrats for all the views he should say that he's laughing he should say that he's showing this to his niece and she thinks it's funny too he should say that a stranger gave him an award for how cool his jacket was yeah i i i've enjoyed all I like all the responses that are like, oh yeah, we're weird. Look at these 10 terabytes of trans photos I've saved on my phone. And I'm now pulling up. Look at how I have deleted every photo of everyone I've ever known and replaced it with like a screenshot of like a trans tick tock.

If I'm weird, why did I teach myself how to reverse bottom surgery by hand? Why did I learn all the steps so I could offer it to people? But to the weird comment in particular, we got Vivek Rameswamy saying, this whole their weird argument from the Democrats is dumb and juvenile. This is a presidential election, not a high school prom queen contest. It's also a tad ironic coming from the party that preaches diversity and inclusion. Win on policy if you can, but cut the crap, please. They don't need to respond to this shit.

Yeah, they're just taking the bit like nobody in real life knows about this. They don't care. And if you said that to them, like, aren't the Republicans so weird? It'll be like, yeah, I don't know't know man like the like it just seems so crazy because The president was Joe Biden or the pre still is the president the president is straight-up fucking senile and probably had a stroke And he's and he's just he can't even get into a car without falling over and then he had two dogs that they had killed falling over and then he had two dogs that they had killed and then his top advisor who's telling him not to drop out even though he was senile until a week ago is his crackhead son who's a convicted felon and has like 10 million nude pictures of himself on the internet. So like

it's like a week out from that so I don't know if like the weird thing is gonna fly. Well but like I mean it's flying in so much as like you're saying that they're rising to the bait and being like, I'm absolutely not weird. And by the way, there's no way to respond to it. Yeah. Yeah. It's a couple of things here. I really like that a line that I've seen a couple of times with, or just like that, like when people talk about how JD Vance is like cratering favorability numbers or particularly like how bad he's doing with suburban women, which is something that they really need to win this election.

And I've seen a number of responses saying, they're just admitting that this election is a popularity contest. And it's just like, whereas, as opposed to what? Yeah, it is a contest to see what person America likes more than the other guy, which is essentially a popularity contest. And if you wanna have a debate on policy, go ahead, but it's not gonna help you in your weird department, because the policy is like,

we need to prevent George Soros from flying black women to get abortions in California. It's weird that he said that to Amy Therese, because didn't Amy Therese come out in support of abortion for that reason? Like we don't need, she said something about like like we don't need any more cheniquas on welfare or something like that. When the Roe v Wade thing happened.

So like I don't even, I'm not going to go listen to that podcast, but I wonder what they were talking about because it seems like they're on polar opposite sides of that. Here's another one from Helen Andrews of the American Conservative Magazine. Calling people weird is such feminine behavior. Textbook sex difference. Men engage in open conflict. Women police conformity. It's honestly disorienting to hear male politicians use the line. Well, the candidate's a woman.

So I don't think it's that big of a deal if there's feminine energy coming from the campaign. I think she's talking about Tim Walz. Yeah, him saying it. Tim Walz is a Minnesota governor. He was the guy who sort of coined the, that got the, their weird ball rolling. And this is a really good one that I saw just before coming online. There was a, there was a guy who said here, like, he was like, the sophisticated wordsmiths

have come up with the word to defeat Trump and it's weird. And now all the NPCs are using it. I feel the idea that it's like, this is a sophisticated word smith technology that they're employing. They're using adjectives like weird to brainwash the masses into thinking that they're a public person. Was that the guy? I thought this was funny.

This guy who said it, he was replying to Helen Andrews, appears to be some type of Jewish magician. Yeah. Yeah, he was replying to Helen Andrews, appears to be some type of Jewish magician. Yeah, yeah, that was him. Yeah, he's a self-built psychic who's also like a Orthodox Jew. He builds himself as the premier psychic of our day. Yeah, well, like that's not allowed. God's against magic. God defeated a lot of magicians in the Tanakh. I don't know what you think you're doing there, buddy.

But I mean, clearly, he thinks words are psychic powers and magic. Yeah, they say says here they all started calling them weird at once. It was obviously planned, cooked up by a sophisticated wordsmith and then distributed by their network. I mean, he's just talking about like once again, he's just talking about a presidential campaign Where one side attempts to define the other negatively in competition and essentially a popularity contest among the American people Right. It's the same thing as like the the whole like current thing. Yeah Where it's like, oh my god events are happening. This is the same thing where it's like wait You're telling me that a party

and their allies in the media have a line of attack? Oh, that's really scary. Yeah, like where's the consistency? You're living in Independence Day. There's a PR campaign coming down from the Kamala campaign and then people on Twitter are getting too excited about it. People are getting a little high on their own supply. That's about it.

There isn't really, there's nothing nefarious going on, but they do look weird trying to come up with a conspiracy about it instead of just saying like, is this all they got? Right. I mean, it's like the same problem that they have with like the voter fraud stuff. They previously like had some success like, you know, with the policy goal of all that which is to like you know keep more people from voting especially like Demographics that typically did not skew Republican But they did that by you know

You know the normal like Lee at water stuff. That's also bad obviously but like it has some purchase in American politics as opposed to like, um, you know, now where it's like, we're going to have Mike Lindell make a 12 hour movie about how they, they, you know, Chinese up the voting process. Yeah. They do both of those at once. Like, yeah, actually put in policies in Georgia to keep Democrats from voting. But then also you've still got the apparatus saying like, we've got to look at the data

from 2020. We got to pull it up. We got to look at the Chinese characters in there. Yeah. Well, it's like when Biden dropped out, it's like they all decided that he was that was the moment he became the democratically elected president when they all started to pretend that this was a coup of some kind. Yeah.

They're like, they overthrew the democratically elected president. Nobody's voted for Kamala Harris. And it's just like, wait a second. At what point did he become democratically elected? Because I thought the whole thing about him was that this was a fraudulent election that he stole from Donald Trump. Why do you care if he's getting, you know, shit can out of the top spot on the ticket by his own party? You don't think any of this is legitimate, so why do you care now? A lot of them think he's dead too, which I don't get because that's exactly what the Democrats want.

They would have loved if a month ago he had just dropped dead and then Kamala could take over and it could be this whole thing like LBJ taking the oath on the plane. It could be like a whole dramatic West Wing moment for them. That's what they wanted. And they wouldn't have to cover it up. They could just say, okay, he died, Kamala's president.

They didn't want like a fucking two month long psycho drama of Joe like petulantly stomping out of meetings and like news reports about how Obama had to tell him he's the best president ever or else Joe would cry. They didn't want that. It wouldn't, like him dying would have been that solves everything. You know? Yeah.

If he had died on day one of his second or his presidency, I thought he had a first term for some reason. I was trying to remember like Biden Trump, Biden Trump, Biden Trump. That's all I can remember as long as I've been alive, but that would have been perfect for them. Alex was born in 2020. We wouldn't have had to deal with this old fucker falling over, having his stupid dogs in there. Well, better dogs and cats, you know, these cat ladies.

I mean, I think of weirdness. Here's what I think JD Vance said this week about his wife. Quote, obviously, she's not a white person, but I love Usha. She's such a good mom. That's a that's a little weird way to talk about your wife because isn't she also a super successful, is she a banker or? I don't know enough JD Vance lore

to tell you what job his wife had. I need to start following the account Usha Vance wins to find out more Usha Vance stuff. I don't really know. Was he talking to Megan Kelly, one of those people? And I guess she asked him a question about his wife and he said, well, yeah, she's she's obviously not white and a lot of white supremacists have attacked us over that, but I love her.

And that was ladies. That's how I would defend you in the same situation, even if you are white. Well, also, I was speaking to Megyn Kelly. Megyn Kelly is the one that's been hammering home this idea that Kamala like has hucked her way to political success by dating the mayor of San Francisco and Montel Williams. Like, look, I know this thing about Kamala has been out there for a while, but I do like the Montel Williams keeps being included on this, like her climbing

the ladder of success. He was fighting with cat turd. You can't get to the top of the Democratic Party without fucking Montel Williams. Obama did it. Biden did it. It's kissing. It's kissing the ring, you know, before James Clyburn will even talk to you. You have to show him proof that you blew Montel. Yeah, you have to open your mouth and show that it's still on your tongue. That's how that's how we knew Bernie was serious in 2020 is he he sucked Montel clean on a live stream.

Yeah, but he didn't go down to Jim Clyburn's office and show him his mouth, though. Yeah, that was like, why didn't he do that? Why didn't he just show him the load? He wasn't serious. He wasn't serious. You already blew Montel like what the fuck? Yeah, come on. Sunk Cost. But Alex, you're the one that pointed out that Megan, Megan Kelly got all this positive press coverage because she was the one who came out and talked about how she got her job at Fox, which was basically like, you know, showing off for Roger Ailes. I mean, I felt like sleeping your way to the top. They made a movie about it.

Yeah. Sleeping your way to the top is like a tried and true path to success. And honestly, like when people say it's illegitimate to sleep your way to the top if you're a woman, untrue. I mean, like it's more impressive to me to get to get there in politics doing the things that like sleeping with Montel or Willie Brown than it is to do any things that men do to get to the top of the political ladder. It's a better, it's a more impressive and translatable skill than, you know, I don't know how Bill Clinton got on to got to the top of the Democratic Party. Yeah.

If you can get to be president by sucking dick, like I don't think Megan Kelly really got to the top. She's kind of been like just falling off for years. Kelly gets like 10,000 views and it's so sad because she's basically like, it's like when you put an animal in captivity, taken out of her natural habitat of the news, she's just doing the news for like 5,000 people on YouTube. And it's like, Megan, you're not the news anymore. It's really,

really depressing. Yeah. She doesn't offer anything compared to Newsmax or any of the crazy people on Telegram and gab and rumble. They're just, there's so much stronger shit out there. Yeah. And also she came out against Trump, didn't she? Did she have like a lib phase?

No, she did. She did. She had MSNBC phase, right? Or did she switch networks? She came out, she was briefly on MSNBC. They paid like tens of millions of dollars to like fire her and not have her on TV because she like I was like, was it Black Santa? That was something about Black Santa.

Yeah, something like that. She was like, we all know Santa Claus is white. OK, we've all seen the photographs. Anyhow, yeah, she, she was on Emma's, but yeah, her Trump thing was during the, before the debate or during the debate, she like asked him some like kind of tough question, I think. And Trump said, Oh, she looked, she looked like she was bleeding out of her eyes or another part of her body. Like, yeah, yeah. I remember that. Was that 2016? That was 2015, I think.

He won after that. Yeah, he did. He didn't do anything. You can say some real foul things about women and still win, unfortunately. You can say you grab them by the pussy and they let you do it and you will still win. We've seen it happen. Well, here's another thing that women are up to.

Did you guys see, there's been a lot of hay made about this, the white women answer the call, which was the largest call in the history of Zoom. And it was like, it's a part of this sort of, like white women for Kamala, white men for Kamala. And I think there's been, I think people are being a little too overheated about this as well.

People are like, this is white identity politics. And like it is, but you know, not the bad kind. It's just it's just white women. They want to feel included. They want to feel cool. And yeah, it's it's hokey as hell. It is corny. But like, what do we make of the white women for Kamala Zoom call? I mean, that's it. I mean, that's who votes like, come on. I mean, get get them all in a zoom call. Get them hype for Kamala.

Well, she's she's married to a white man. She's married to a white man and not a white woman. So I think she actually likes us better. Just saying. So I mean, like, that's why white women need to up their appeal to her. Does she have any women in her family? Probably not. I think she only likes white men, which is why I'm voting for. All right, let's turn to Trump for a second. Trump had some good, he had some good hits this week. Uh, the, the one that people have been talking about a lot is his comments that seems to imply that if you voted for him, you wouldn't have to

vote again in another election. Well, I thought this was good politics. Yeah. Frankly, Joe Biden, Joe Biden should have gone with this. I know, right? Yeah. It's like, um, no one likes voting. And this was like the first guy to recognize that.

And think about the average age of people in his crowds. Like this might be the last election they vote. It's probably true, yeah. No, I think you're exactly right, Felix. I think, you know, for the liberal opendocracy, I mean, look, it certainly sounds malevolent when a former president and current presidential candidate says, vote for me so you won't have to vote in another election, we'll solve all the problems and you will never have to vote again.

But that being said, I think you're right, Felix. I think for Democratic and Republican voters, provided their candidate was the one who won and ended democracy, I think people mostly will be on board with that because no one likes this shit. Yeah, no, it's not fun. It's not fun to vote. No one thinks that. But yeah, you could sell it from the left saying that they're just going to try to steal it. They're going to do all this voter fraud bullshit.

So why do we even do this? Why do we even do this? Can't we just have the experts figure it out? Yeah. But like deeper than like, you know, obviously like it, it betrays a certain authoritarian streak in him. But I interpret it as something different way. I think it betrays how tired he is of running for president and how badly he wants this all to be over. Right.

Right. I think he's protecting himself. Like he doesn't want to have to keep doing this. He doesn't want to keep doing this. And now there's a new person to run again. It's like, it's like your senile and they change out your nurse. You have to learn your nurse's name. Like I'm going to have to ask her her name 50 times.

It's going to be it's going to be like the work, the hardest thing I've ever had to do. There is another another good Trump clip from earlier this week. He said, but we will be creating so much electricity that you'll be saying, please, please, President, we don't want any more electricity, we can't stand it. You'll be begging me, no more electricity, sir. We have enough, we have enough.

We have enough, we have enough. Like, what does that even mean? It doesn't make any sense. He's like, he's playing the hits. With money or something. He's playing the hits. He's replaying the hits. He's replaying like, you know, Tired of Winning.

His heart is clearly not in this one. You can't really have Excess electricity as a consumer. You only get as much as you're Consuming. It's not like coming out of the outlet. It's just a weird way to use that analogy. My TV won't turn off. There's too much electricity. Stop, Mr. President.

You're going to have so much water. There's going to be so much running water in your house. You can't turn off the faucets. It's going to fill. It's going to be on the floor. You're going to say, Mr. Trump, Mr. Trump, no more water, no more water. It's causing mold damage, no more water. And I'm going to say no, keep it on. He also said, speaking of his golf game, he says, and I can hit the crap out of the ball. When you win a club championship, that means you can play under pressure. You can ask a lot of people up there like Brett Baer, ask him Trump can play. So Brett Baer are waiting for comments on this. I mean, I don't think I'm

thinking you have to like, oversell I think Trump is it probably a pretty good golfer. It's like the one thing he enjoys doing in this life. But it's like similar to the electricity comment to the you won't have to vote again comment to him talking about this golf game. I don't I think his heart is not really in it this time. I think I think he's looking for a way out. Yeah. But, you know, I mean, he could still win. And that, I mean, like, I think that would be like kind of punishment for him at this point. Yeah, he doesn't want to. He does not want to lose, but he doesn't want to win either. He's probably he dies. Yeah.

Yeah, he's in a pretty impossible spot. Like he feels he has to win or else like he, you know, he goes to trial. He goes to jail for like having the dirty bathroom with the documents in it, which, like, is not going to happen anymore, from what I can ascertain. Like, the judge was like, you can, your bathroom can be dirty if you're the president. It's OK. But, yeah, he feels like he has to do that. And also he doesn't want the humiliation of losing. And he feels like if he wins this time, it will show that he actually won in 2020.

But he fucking hates this. He hates being president. He was so unhappy as president, except for like a few instances like the handsome football hamburger party. Yeah, that was getting to sit in the truck. Yeah. Yeah. Feeding the fish with Shinzo Abe overfeeding the koi fish. Oh, Yeah. Feeding the fish with Shinzo Abe. Overfeeding the koi fish.

Oh, yeah. So good. Oh, it's so good. Oh, God. Look what happened to Abe. Look what happened to fucking. Yeah. Trump's the survivor. You would think of all those two leaders, you would think the one that would actually die from the gun violence would be the one in America. But he just got his ear. Yeah.

Yeah. It shows what happens when you want it more. You know, like that's what I think like Trump, Trump, Trump almost getting killed was like, I think that was the nadir of his political campaign this time around. I think that was the best thing that happened to him. And I think it's all going to get bad from there. And if only he had just turned a little bit to the left, he could have been he could have he could have gone straight to Valhalla, he's going to straight to the great golf course in the sky and he would be remembered fondly as our greatest American president

Was that before the VP our greatest American president to be killed? Yeah, that was right before the VP pick right before I wonder What would have happened who would they have nominated? It wouldn't have been JD Vance. That's for sure. Maybe DeSantis I can't think of anybody who would be out Marco Rubio little Marco. Maybe there's nobody who has the swag to do it. I don't know what they would do. Probably Glenn Youngkin. Yeah. If like the party finally gets to do it, I would assume like Glenn Youngkin or like Doug Burzum as an outside pick. Like one of them died now. They would pull Vance out.

They wouldn't make him 100 percent. Yeah, no, they would pick one of the more normal telegenic governors. Glenn Blumkin or Doug Burzum? Yeah, well they like yeah, they a lot of people thought I don't know that Trump was gonna pick Burzum just because it would be the smart choice But like, you know, the point of Trump is always that he doesn't do like the smart politician thing He does like whatever he wants to do, which it sometimes like is a great advantage. And other times is like the 100% worst fucking choice anyone could ever make.

He wants JD Vance to be his son. Yeah, that's the that's the vibe I got at the RNC when he was watching Eric and he was watching his shitty actual son speeches and just kind of falling asleep. And then he has JD Vance sitting next to him. He's like my new son, my wonderful new son who has the resentment and hatred of his bitch mother that drives him. None of Trump's sons have that. None of Trump's sons hate their mom.

They like their mother and that's why they can't beat Trump. But JD Vance hates his mother and that's why he can beat Trump. To examine things from the other side of the aisle, I did want to touch on something we talked about last week. It's in the New York Times from just the other day. This is by Peter Baker, who's another very reliable regime spokesperson. But this is about sort of Harris's sort of a change in tone as it relates to Israel and Palestine.

The headline is, Harris offers support for Israel but calls out Palestinians' plight after talk with Netanyahu. We talked about the closed door meeting where she supposedly read him the riot act. But here's in the New York Times, Peter Baker writes it, Vice President Kamala Harris offered Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu strong support for Israel's right to defend itself from terrorism on Thursday, but declared that far too many innocent civilians had died in Gaza and that I will not be silent about their suffering. In what amount did- I will not be silent?

You're the president. Like I think so much of this genre thing is annoying, right? Where like Joe Biden would tweet out like, you know, we should have gun control. People would be like, you're the president. Like, okay, we get it. But like, he's trying to use the office of the president to, you know, put forth his stupid policy goal. But with this, it's like, we won't look away?

Well, you could do a lot more than look, you know? There's more things, there are more powers afforded to you here. It's just a generational update of the same spiel. Yeah. They just know to use different words. They know to use different phrases. Like, we see you, we hear you, we're listening.

You are valid. We're gonna do the same exact shit, but you are valid. We're going to get better help to Palestinians. He says, and what amounted to her debut on the world stage since her rapid ascension as the presumptive Democratic nominee for president, Ms. Harris sought to strike a balance and capture what she called the complexity of the strife in the Middle East. But while she did not stray from President Biden on policy, she struck a stronger tone on the plight of Palestinians. What has happened in Gaza over the past nine months is devastating, she told reporters after meeting with Mr.

Netanyahu at the White House complex, the images of dead children and desperate hungry people fleeing for safety, sometimes displaced for the second, third or fourth time, we cannot look away in the face of these tragedies. We cannot allow ourselves to become numb to their suffering and I will not be silent. Like this is the most condescending, this is worse in my opinion than Joe Biden talking about, you know, videos of babies that he supposedly saw. Because this is like, oh, I'm acknowledging how devastating all these images are and I won't be silent about the images. What's producing the images? I'm still going to be silent about that. And the images will continue, but we will feel the plight in a

way that's even deeper and more emotional now than it was before. It reminds me of what Matt called, you know, the idealized perception of Obama towards the end among Democrats, which is a witness or in chief. Yeah. Straight out of that playbook. And I'd like to bring this up in light of today's events that are going on in Israel, which basically, I don't know if you've been following this, but they're experiencing something of a January 6 style event in which mobs of settlers

are overrunning military courts and bases. It's however, it's not to stop the steal. It's to stop the ongoing rape of their political prisoners. And no, this is not an exaggeration. Well, no, they're the settlers. The settlers and politicians are storming the bases. Yeah, military police are arresting Israeli soldiers for raping Palestinian detainees in military prisons. Sorry, I misspoke.

It's to stop the arrest of people who are raping their political prisoners. Yeah, they're going to have a civil war over their soldiers' right to rape. And it's not a, you know, this is not like a fringe position. Several Likud ministers are involved in this. What a wonderful country. Yeah. Hope it doesn't last too much longer. The Israeli people really make their government look good,

which is really saying something. I mean, not in this like the government is sort of with the people. I know. I know. I know. But, you know, it's just and they're arresting these guys or they're at least investigating it because they want to prove to the International Criminal Court that it can investigate and prosecute their own war criminals. So we don't need your arrest warrants. We'll handle this ourselves and look what's happening. Yeah, yeah.

It is sort of the perfect Israeli thing because they're trying to show like some sense of like propriety or impartiality, but they can't even like muster that for two seconds. They can't even like agree on the idea that it's like bad to rape like a 15 year old that you arrested for no reason. Well, they're at war. This is a war right now. We can't we can't prosecute war crimes when there's a war. Peace time is when you focus on war crimes, right? You just let them happen and then maybe 10, 15 years

in the future, assuming there isn't another war, then we can deal with them. But yeah, so yeah, this is the country that Kamala is adopting a slightly more emotive tone about. I have seen as you have, I'm sure, the images, the photographs of the loss of civilian life in Gaza and it is heartbreaking. The injury and death to children.

So let me start by saying that it is absolutely tragic when there is ever anywhere any loss of innocent life, of innocent civilians, of children. no word that I can offer you that justifies any other feeling in terms of the loss of that life. It's tragic. I just want to follow up specifically with the refugee camps. Do you think that that is a legitimate military target? That it's an acceptable war? We are not telling Israel how it should conduct this war. And so I'm not going to speak to that. Moving on, I have a reading series here at the end.

I'd like to dive into another New York Times article today that I think speaks to the sort of general weirdness we've been discussing. I mean, this is an old story, but I think it speaks to the weirdness that we've been discussing. This is a headline wracked by pain and then raptured by a right wing miracle cure. This is about, are you guys familiar with med beds? Oh yeah, I love med beds.

No, what are these? Okay, well listen to this. It removes cigarettes from your skin. Ooh. 50 years of smoking cigarettes, it can just go away like that. And Trump's going to bring them to us. Sorry, the article begins, Michael Cheesebrough awoke to the same reality as he did every morning with pain radiating up his spine and into his shoulders before he opened his eyes.

He remained still for a moment, summoning the courage to reach from his bed to his nightstand. He rolled onto his back, which was fused together with metal after almost 20 years as a paratrooper in the military. He extended his arm, which had broken several times while wrangling balls and horses on his ranch outside Cheyenne, Wyoming. Finally, his hand found his cell phone, and he logged onto the online universe where he spent most of his days. On the other end of his phone were hundreds of people in a live voice chat for Patriot Party News, one of about a dozen far right media platforms that has grown in both size and influence over the years,

not only by creating an ecosystem of disinformation, but also by providing an authentic sense of community. The company was co-founded in 2020 by Warren Armour, a conservative with no media experience who runs a flooring company in Tennessee. But Michael admired the Patriot News slogan when he first saw it shared on Facebook last year. If you hate mainstream media, you are going to love us." So he's basically like, he's got chronic back issues and like, you know, these chronic pain issues, which is, you know, enough to drive anyone insane. Like I, you know,

W Bull, L Veteran, W Bull. If you get injured wrangling with Like I, I, you know, W bull L veteran W bull. If you get injured wrangling with a bull, I think you deserve your injuries. Like, I don't think they should even take you to the ER. They should just leave you on the ground. Um, but so it says here, um, I'm so glad we're in this war together. Set an aircraft mechanic who went by the name oath keeper bill. We need you healthy and strong. Have you been following the latest news on med beds? Oh, yeah, they're here and they can heal anything. Someone else responded cancer, dementia, broken bones, arthritis.

Forty five minutes in one of those beds and you'll never be in pain again. Come on, Michael said. Really? So I remember this being a plot point in the Matt Damon movie Elysium, but let's go a little further to talk about what these med-beds are. Of all the wild conspiracies he discovered on Patriot Party News, the concept of med-beds had initially struck Michael as the most far-fetched, even if it was among the most popular. Every few days, someone else on the platform shared an illustration of a futuristic-looking chamber sometimes with a doctored image of Trump superimposed in the foreground.

The founder of the site, Armour, sometimes mentioned videos or podcasts about med-beds that had become popular on the far right corners of Telegram, Discord, Rumble, and Michael clicked on the links, as did millions of others. The videos claimed with no evidence that the US military was already in possession of advanced or possibly even alien technology that could cure all diseases and extend human life. There was said to be at least three types of med beds already in existence in secret military tunnels. One, a holographic med bed, scanned the body to instantly diagnose and then heal any sickness no matter how severe. Another bed was able to regenerate personal DNA so people could regrow missing limbs in a few minutes. A third was designed for reverse aging

and could rewind people's bodies to the age and condition of their choosing. The only hold-up, according to the videos, was that a collection of liberal billionaires kept hoarding the technology for themselves. On the Patriot Party News Radio audio feed, people speculated that med beds wouldn't be available to the public until Trump was back in control of the White House, at which point everyone would be invited to make appointments for free at a secret underground military base. There's something just so deeply disgusting to me about these people, these old people, who hate their kids. They've left their children nothing. They've left us a world that's worse than when they found it. And then at the end of their life,

while we're all like struggling, they're like, what if I could just make myself young? What if I could make myself my kids age and then I could get a second chance? Well, that's your kids, that's your kids. It's not you, you don't get a second chance, it's your kids. All right, a couple of elements It's your kids. All right.

A couple of elements here. I'd like to, okay. I like the idea that these are available only in secret underground military bases, but also that these devices will be available for free at the secret underground military bases. What country do you think you're living in? If such a thing existed, why do you think it would be provided for free by the government or the military?

And number two, if this technology existed, why didn't they use it on Joe Biden? If this could cure dementia and aging, why didn't they put Joe Biden in a med bed? Or has he died years ago? And what we're seeing of him shambling around is what a med bed can do to someone who's dead. They can get you to the level of a senile dementia patient, it provided you're dead. But if you were actually alive, they could have reversed and they could have like reversed him to like Amtrak, Delaware Joe that we all know and love. That whole thread of conservatism is so weird where they're basically like the

Queen Romana people in Canada. Yeah. They think like the government should pay everyone's mortgage. They should pay everyone's bills. They should just cover every everyone gets a house. Everyone gets three cars. Everyone gets a spaceship. Everyone just gets whatever they want for free. And there doesn't have to be an actual economy. Like we just use space magic to create unlimited resources for everybody.

But only white homeowners who are behind on their mortgage payments and not for anybody else. Well, it's the legal immigrants. This is conservatism. And then meanwhile, they hate homeless people. They hate welfare. They hate freeloaders. And instead of that, they're not even doing like the personal responsibility capitalism

thing. They're just saying the government should fix all of my problems magically. Everything should just be done for me magically. And they already have it, they just need to give it to me. They just haven't shipped it out to me yet. It says here, thank God the wait is almost over. Michael heard someone on the audio channel in the last days of spring.

Med beds are finally coming. I hope I can get my mom to the front of the line since she's stage four. Oh, that's depressing. Ouch. Yeah, that's very grim. That's really grim. Someone, that's depressing. Ouch. Yeah, that's very grim. That's really grim.

Someone says, I hate to rain on the parade, but are we sure this isn't too good to be true, Michael said? Sounds like it could be a scam. Why haven't we heard about this anywhere more mainstream? Right, someone responded, because the mainstream media is always trustworthy. Okay, true, Michael said, but nothing from doctors, hospitals? You expect to hear the truth from corporate medicine? Look, it sounds true, Michael said, but nothing from doctors hospitals. You expect to hear the truth from the corporate from corporate medicine. Look, it sounds great. Michael said,

if I can lay in a bed and choose my age, my wife will be changing my diapers at the beginning of my life and not at the end. But I'd like more evidence. So like, wait, wait, wait, you want to be turned into a baby again? Hold on. But you're turning into a baby. into a baby again. Hold on. But your wife is the same age. Why would you be turned into a baby? If you would make your wife a pedophile, your wife would be married to a baby. She would be married to a baby. They would take you away and you would become an orphan. It's like, look, I do want my wife to change my diapers, but only when I'm a baby, only when

I'm an infant, not someone who whose her age. That's weird. That's so weird. I think there's a burgeoning conservative baby fur movement. Like this? Elon Musk? Have you seen the Elon Musk baby fur truth stuff? Oh yeah, I did, yeah. And I wonder what that guy thinks about trans people.

This guy is like, I need a machine where I can make myself a baby. I need to become a baby so my wife can take care of me as a baby. But I don't want to do any weird shit. None of this gender crap. If it was a girl baby, oh my God, that would be off. They need to turn that setting off. Don't let them do that. Do not let they can cure stage four cancer and they can regrow limbs, but do that. Do not let, they can cure stage four cancer and they can regrow limbs, but do not, I don't want you regrowing a penis or anything like that. None of that stuff, nothing below the waist.

That would be unnatural and against God's plan for human life. It would be unnatural. Yeah. But yeah, extending your life in some horrific pantomime of like cheating death, yes, please. I never want to, I never want my kids to inherit anything. I'm going to be, I'm going to be in this house for another 200 years. You're not getting shit. You think you're inheriting this house?

Wrong. I'm getting in a med bed and becoming a baby again. And you can't, and you, by the way, you can't use the med bed. Yeah. I'm going to inherit from you because I'm going to be a baby. If you're a parent and you become a baby again, I think your kids have to take care of you because who would they give you to? Maybe your siblings? Listen to this. It says here, several other companies had started producing their own versions of med beds in the last few years. One company, Tesla BioHealing, had purchased a half dozen old motels in places like Tampa, Florida, Dubuque, Iowa, and Butler, Pennsylvania, and then turned them into med bed centers

where each room came equipped with proprietary canisters under the bed that provided what the company called life force energy. Other groups were running scams on Facebook and charging $800 for redemption cards with a photograph of Trump's face and a code that said they would provide secret passage into the underground military bases where med beds were said to be ready for use. You've got to get the med beds out of the deep underground military bases. We've got to get them out of the domes and into disused motels in Dubuque, Iowa so people can turn into babies again. And you have to pay for a pass.

So they don't even really want it to be free. Like if it's free for them, they would take that, but they actually, they prefer it if they're paying for a secret gold ticket that has Elon Musk and Donald Trump on it, and only they get to use this and not other people. Cause that's what they're after most of all, is the feeling that they're smarter than other people cause they read some shit on Facebook and they have the true information.

I mean like yeah like the the the revalued currency the Iraqi dinar you know gold med beds oh it's just yeah it's just there's gotta be some magic thing. Everyone's waiting for the miracle. Waiting for the miracle, you know? Yeah. I just wish there would be some luck for white boomers. Like, I just wish that they could have, they could get lucky just once. Like, they bought their house for $400. They went to college for $200. They had three cars. They got a free house because of, they got a job that paid $40 an hour in 1962 where

they were just watching shit go by on an assembly line, filling out a clipboard. And I just wish they would have some luck. Yeah, being born in America after World War II is like hitting the powerball jackpot of human existence. It's like you've won the lottery twice already. And you're like, I just, I just, yeah, I've got to, we've've got to get some we got to get it back. We've got to get our we learn a hot streak, but now we're all losing it. And they're

hiding the med beds from us. But yeah, like there was there was an article there was something earlier in the piece that I didn't get to where we talked about that it's liberal billionaires are keeping the med beds for themselves in the deep underground military bases. So in collusion with the military, like George Soros is using the med bed for himself. But have you seen George Soros lately? He looks awful. I mean, most conservatives have moved on to his fucking son Alex Soros,

right? Isn't he the new boogeyman? Well, no, that is George. That is George after the med bed. Isn't he marrying Huma? Is? Isn't Alex Soros marrying Huma? Is it? Some Soros is marrying Huma, right? Anthony Weiner is former wife. He met a traitor, right? Yeah. Anyway, I think that does it for today's episode. I hope everyone, wishing the best, wishing the best to Team USA and getting that bed bed if you're to win those medals. Just turn yourself into a 22 year old again

at the peak of athletic performance. But if that doesn't work, turn yourself into a baby and start training from, you know, really from day one. Yeah, it's never too late to start over. All right, till next time everybody, bye bye. Oh yeah, bye bye. Wait, actually, no, no, no, before we leave, before we leave, very important announcement.

Reminding you of our new merch store, chapotraphouse.com slash store. No, there's a pot. Okay, I stumbled on it. It's Choppo trap house dot store. No dot com slash store. Choppo trap house dot store. Yes, choppo trap house dot store. We've got new merch in there. We've got the Zapata oil hats, get the t shirts, and we'll have some new merchandise coming out

by this fall. Yeah, throughout the rest of the year. Throughout the rest of the year, there'll be new merch drops happening at ChoppoTrapHouse.store. All right. Thanks to Alex for joining us today and we'll see you again on Thursday. Bye bye. Yes, sir. Bye. I'm a jerk, come on Touch me, I'm sick

Wow, I won't live long