Chapo Trap House - Bonus: This is Sus

Episode Date: April 4, 2020

Felix reviews the first two episodes of the hit 2016 NBC dramedy "This Is Us".

Hey everybody. It's Felix. Last week I made a commitment. I said that I will watch some shows from NBC's Primetime Drama Lineup in a Super Size Me type affair where I will watch these shows and do solo episodes about them. I've done it. Watch two episodes of This Is Us, the first two episodes. This is terrible. This is fucking awful. This is some of the worst shit I've ever watched. I went into this as a bit of a free speech fundamentalist. I've defended a lot of really problematic stuff. I think Mad TV should be back on. It should be more racist than when it was on originally. I've defended Brass Eye, Day to Day, the most edgy segments, all the video games where you tactically commit a school shooting. But this is probably

going to make me sort of a PMRC mom. I actually think that they should take these shows away from older Gen Xers and force them to play games like Soldier of Fortune 2 and Mortal Kombat. But we're saying true to our word. We're saying true to what we committed to. There is no fire without friction in life. I am going to recap these first two episodes and let you know what we have in store for the future of this quarantine-borne series. This horrible thing I'm doing to myself at the behest of people with real jobs, of people who are in physical danger. I'm putting myself in mental danger. For you, I would say I'm almost as brave or braver than Andrew from E1, who is a nurse. I mean, you decide. Our first episode, it starts with Milo Ventigliama. However, you say

that name, the guy who got fired for Breitbart for saying he wanted to make out with kids or something. He landed on his feet as an actor. It's good for him. He looks great. He looks better than ever. I always believe in second chances, unless it's for something like this, which is harming the world. Okay, so Milo Ventigliama, we're just going to call him Jack. His character's name is Jack. The thing that Joe Biden says when his dusty synapses shoot little dying spark plugs sparks at each other. Jack is naked, and his wife, Mandy Moore Rebecca, is wearing the worst pregnancy prosthetic I've ever seen in my life. She looks like she tried to smuggle a 100-year-old snapping turtle under her skin. It's truly poorly done. He's naked. It's got a classic

boner where you guys all know what it's like to have a boner when you see a woman in her bra. It's pretty nice. Have a nice set and those things. You're getting hard. He's turning 36, which is the age that everyone in Hollywood is stuck on forever. He's like, do a sexy dance for me. It's my birthday. She's like, I'm so pregnant. I'm disgusting. Anyway, he goes to try to eat her pussy and her water breaks. This is proof that no Italians actually do eat pussy. The spranos was right. It's just a trick to make their wives give birth so they can have a son that they teach to comb their hair back so hard it causes their hairline to recede at age 28. So they go to the hospital, presumably get that baby taken care of. The three babies,

she's having triplets. Then we cut to, there's a very overweight woman. She has a bunch of post-it notes written on the bullshit refrigerator. There's a birthday cake. There's a bunch of other shit. She's also turning 36. There was a quote at the beginning of the show about how many people share birthdays, but that's one way to look into it, that this is just like part of the inner mythology of this dumb show. There's some really dumb mythology in it. We'll get to that later. But I believe it's probably like a demonic signal by the writers of this show to their god king, Jeffrey Epstein. I never went to a Hebrew school or anything so I don't know that much about numerology. I'm sorry. It's up to the listeners to figure this one out what the significance of 36

is. She has a bunch of post-it notes all over her refrigerator. They say stuff like, don't eat this. She pulls back one that says, don't eat this. There's one beneath that goes, are you serious? Are you serious, Kate? She shakes her head and then she's like, you know what? I'm 36. It's time to lose this weight. She starts throwing all this shit in the trash. She's having a realization of her life and we see this hot stupid actor guy and he's with two absolute Instagram 10 out of 10 baddies and they're like, we want to work your heart on. However, you know how they write like sex stuff on network TV. We want to see if that thing goes. They're talking about his dick and he's like, he's just like generally being the brooding actor with a lot of money who's sad

that he doesn't do good acting. The only thing in the show I related to is the part after this where they take him out to the pool party or in like Vegas or some shit and he starts talking about how his life all started going to hell when he witnessed the Challenger explosion when he was in like fourth grade and this is a technique I've used to ward women off just talking about some tragedy that didn't really affect you but just an excuse to talk about it. It's kind of swag, sort of makes him the only likeable character in this whole affair that he is successfully um, warding off women and their awful advances by making an excuse. My favorite thing, the thing that gives life meaning, making excuses, making excuses. All right, so she, he's on the phone,

he gets a call that saves him from putting on a condom, taking a look at that bra, doing all that stuff we know about. And guess what? It's Kate, it's the woman we saw in the last scene. What? That's his sister? And it's his birthday? Whoa, what the fuck? Uh-oh, better, better make a bookmark there. Uh-oh, I hope you still have your scholastic bookmarks, readers. Hope you can remember that part because it's important. Okay, so uh, Jack and Rebecca, cut back to them, they're at the hospital and it's not their regular pussy doctor, it's this old guy. His name is Dr. K and he goes, you can call me Dr. K to be folksy because everything in this show is written in soycore. Like this scene takes place in 1980 and this

doctor looks like a fucking prospector that was forcibly bathed, but he's like, uh, yeah, so we're gonna do the thing where you act like you know me. I like, I'm gonna be a little folksy because everyone on this, everyone who wrote for this show has had their brain so warped by only being in writers rooms for like fucking two decades that they can only imagine people talking like them, even if it's like, even if it's like a Korean war veteran who has looked at, looked at broken pussies for 40 years. He's still, he's still talking like a guy who banders with Chuck Windig. Um, he's goes through his whole soycore spiel of like, uh, uh, yeah, so I've seen quite a lot in my day. I'm a, I'm 73. Yeah, I've seen all, and then he's like reassures Rebecca because she's freaking

out. Like I've never had a pussy, but I imagine like if you had one mechanic on it for however many months it takes to create the baby and a new one comes in, you'd be freaked out, but he, he, he, he totally ameliorates the situation by being nice. Um, so he's working on the, he's working on the undercarriage, nothing to worry about there. So we cut to this, uh, sort of, uh, I'd say like late thirties, like in shape, handsome black dude, finance guy. It played by Sterling Cape Brown. His name is Randall and he's looking at his emails and, you know, you've seen emails in network TV shows. They're like, um, great job on the business deal, subject line, a million dollars. And then there's one that's like, uh, the camera pans down in a

way where you can tell it's important. And that's right when everyone in his office, um, at his nondescript finance job, because he has his dual monitor setup, no RGB, no, no e-girl lighting, but he has a dual monitor set up to, you know, monitor currency trades. Um, they're like happy birthday, Randall, because yeah, it's his fucking birthday too. Whoa. Um, while they're there and all the people who are unindicted co-conspirators, which Jeffrey Epstein in his office are singing him the birthday song, uh, he looks at the email. It's a picture of an elderly black man. It's his dad. He didn't notice dad. Whoa, holy shit. All right. So Sterling Cape Brown Randall, he goes to, uh, he goes to this, um, like sort of row house and he barges in and, whoa, it's, it's, it's

his dad. And he, he said, he gives him this whole thing. He goes, you left me at a firehouse when I was a newborn. You piece of shit. Like he, he points to his, uh, bands outside and he goes, you see that car? It cost a hundred thousand dollars and I bought a cash because I feel like it. Like, uh, okay. Just, uh, this guy is presumably homeless for most of his life. Like, look, you know, no one has a good relationship with their dad, but you're also not winning any awards for playing, paying MSRP when you literally work in the most evil industry in the world. You can't just like, uh, cut a deal with some other guy who owns like a lesser pedophile island to give you like a car that fell off a truck in Germany. Uh, but yeah, it's like an extremely

malformed version of everyone's favorite scene, everyone's favorite series scene from Fresh Brits of Bel Air, you know, like, why doesn't he want me, man? But done really shittily, done in, you know, 2016 or whenever this, this show's first started airing where everything is like cut for time and like made with the idea that it will show up in gift form later or it will be like, uh, a video that someone posts on Twitter 10 years in the future where they go, who else, who, uh, who else felt like this scene snapped? Who else cried when this scene happened? And, you know, so, uh, Ken Olin, the never Bernie executive producer piece of shit of this show, can, uh, buy like a heated footpath for his Tesla with all the extra residuals from it going viral

even 10 years after this awful show is out of storylines. But, you know, because this should, you know, what's the greatest part of fiction? It's parallels. We get another bad dad scene. It's the actor in his show. He's in this stupid show called the nanny or the manny where the thing is he's a like hot guy who has a baby. I always say that you can tell the strength of a TV show by how well they do the fictional TV shows within the TV show. Think about it. The fictional TV shows in the sopranos, amazing, hilarious, like the Law and Order clone, they built an entire episode around it that was hysterical where Adriana thought like, uh, uh, spouses cannot testify against each other. Um, it shows the, it shows the imagination of the writers and how deep the

lore of the show is and how, how, how dedicated to world building, but in a compacted way the writers are, how much they're invested really. But when it's like, there's a lot of bad network TV. There's a really only bad network TV, but this is not a show that would be on. This is a show that would be on in like 1987, but because like everyone who writes for the show is 78 years old and has been saying they're 36 since the Clinton administration, this is what we get. But he brings in, uh, Alan Thicke to play his dad and they, yeah, well, what is, oh, his dad abandoned him in the show and they have a big argument and he, he really pushed for the scene because he thinks the show is stupid and beneath him and he wants like real

craft and the audience loves it. They're like, good job, Alan Thicke. Good job guys, the same birthday as everybody. You fucking bawled out. All right. That was, yeah, you're like, damn, good things still can't happen in this world. Faith and humanity restored. Cut to the sister, Kate, sister of the actor. She's in a eating, eating disorder group. And you know, the people are going around like, oh, my husband is keeping me fat or like, I have like, uh, overeating issues with childhood. And there was just a woman who has bulimia, but it just like, it just like played initially as a laugh. It's like, she goes, the line is, I know that you, that, uh, what you people think of me, but do you know what it's like to look like me and have that seven

extra pounds of, uh, of body fat in the middle? And it's like, yeah, I know that's no one would ever fucking say that. I mean, like, I'm not begging for realism in my TV shows, but just some approximation of how anyone would ever sound just ever, ever at all. I don't think that literally, I mean, you know what it is? It's like how whenever these people, these fucking screenwriter pieces of shit, right? Those dialogue tweets about like, something political happening where it's like, me, I think women are great. Trump supporter. I want to rape every woman, uh, Bernie supporter. I don't know. Joe Biden's bad. We're just like, no one sounds like this or even thinks like this. And it's like, oh yeah, you've had your brain warped

and totally destroyed by the smog in Los Angeles County and baked by the fucking sun. You're completely alienated from any human interaction because every conversation, every little interaction you've had with somebody for the last 30 years of your life has been from like fucking ballet guys to your friends has been someone trying to get something like someone's trying to be noticed. Someone's trying to be discovered. Someone's trying to become the showrunner on, uh, whoops, you know, whoops, I married my wife. You're all like, you just, everyone you know is a complete piece of shit. You would kill each other for your first EP credit at age 60. You just, you cannot actually conceive of an actual person's desires or even

just their most basic thoughts. So you get to write tweets like that that go viral and your show sounds like that now too. Um, so there like, there's a guy in the group who's epic. He's like an epic fat guy. He like, and he like starts laughing during one of the people's stories. And that's how we know he's epic. And he like immediately hits it off with Kate because like he's the only guy she's ever met who's epic. Keep in mind the real version of this character. The character's name by the way is, uh, this character's name is Toby. And, uh, if this character was actually true to form, he would be calling me the N word in CS go. This is what this guy really is. But because it's a TV show, they're like, whoa, he was epic to the

fat sister. Wow. Um, around this point, I started getting the thought, I remember this thing that my sister, my sister is a, uh, professor in writing. She's a PhD, she's written a beautiful book. She's the best writer I know, one of the smartest people, maybe the probably the smartest and funniest person I've ever known in my life. Something that she said about marriage story that I thought was incredible. She said about marriage story. I would tell, I would tell, um, Noah Bombach, something similar to what I tell my students. Is there any way that you could make the audience care about these characters if it wasn't a millionaire Hollywood director and his beautiful, perfect millionaire actor wife? No. Okay. Rewrite it. That's what, that's what's

going on with this show. Like you have, you have fucking, you have Randall and his only thing is that he's like a millionaire who has the, the trauma of having a bad dad who left him at a firehouse when he was a kid. The only other things he does are like make about a lot of money and be nice to his daughters. Is there any way to make anyone care about that character if he's not a fucking millionaire? The sister, Kate, like her only thing is that she eats a lot. That, that, that she has this problem with her weight. There's nothing else there. She's just like, she's just this fucking void that you throw the other characters shitty lines into. There's like, no, there's just no actual anything here. It's, it's just nothing. There's nothing,

there are multiple, at least like 80% of the characters. There's nothing there. And they, they have to think of like one thing to make you care about them. There's just, there's nothing. Every side character in this round is every fucking every, every, every gross restorkler, every like fucking associate you see who's killed in the same episode he's introduced has more characterization than anything here. The same is true of justified. The same is true of, you know, any, yeah, probably sons of anarchy. Sons of anarchy has way better characterization than this. But anyway, um, yeah, she, you know, what a surprise. The epic, the epic guy is going to go on a date with Kate. All right. Um, we cut back to the hospital and remember how Jack and

Rebecca were having triplets. Well, okay, the third one unfortunately died. And the doctor literally fucking after he fucking tells Jack this, Dr. K, he fucking sits down and says, do you mind if I try to be profound with you? Like, first of all, if I, if I didn't know it was going on with my wife and one of my kids died in childbirth and a doctor gave me a fucking soycore line like that, I would, I would, I would fucking airhole his entire head. I feel like I, for all I know, my wife is dead and one of my kids died in fucking childbirth. It was a horrifying moment of my life. And you're like, uh, yeah, so we're going to try to be doing this now. There was a little bit of a farewell. There was a 404 when your triplet was born. Uh, so yeah, that

happened. Um, as if your wife's pregnancy couldn't get any more dumpster fire. Uh, literally, literally, maybe Trump should build a wall around your wife's pussy. Um, okay, if anyone's got any cat gifts, we're going to need them. That would be the most shot doctor in human history. He would endure the most gunshot wounds ever. But to add insult to injury with this bad writing and bad characterization, the doctor who says this, I want to remind you is 73 years old in the year 1980. He lived through the great influenza. It's 1980. Like Jimmy Carter split. There's a chance he's still fucking president in this timeline. No one fucking talked like that then. No one. Whoa. Jesus fucking credit. Like this was this entire show is designed specifically to accelerate like my

natural predisposition towards internal organ cancers. It's probably accelerated by 30 years in my bladder while watching this show. But so somehow Jack doesn't fucking murder the doctor while he's giving his like why a wizened but soy spiel. And they're like, Hey, by the way, someone left a baby at the hospital. Yeah, there's just a spare one. Keep that in mind, man. Make that bookmark again. Okay. Cut back to the Randall and his bad dad, the crack dad. He's dying. I think of this, but I literally just said, fuck you while watching my screen. I just said, fuck you. Again, you can't think of any actual interesting characterizations. You can't like make that dynamic. The I mean, admittedly very hack dynamic of abandon son

reconciles with abandoning father is like the one of the most overused like TV drama or even TV comedy plotlines. You're like, Oh, yeah, he also has cancer. The doctor at the hospital has this like stupid phrase about lemons. Then Kate, we cut back to Kate and Kevin talking. She says the thing about lemons. Oh, is your brain started? Is your brain started ticking? Well, it turns out that Jack and Rebecca that part is taking place in the 1980s. Kevin and Kate are the two surviving kids who came out of the wife, the kid that was left at the fire station, brought to the hospital. It's Randall. Right here. I wrote the show is the most insane thing I've ever seen. I'm fucking done, man. All right. Well, after this, I was committed to a second episode. I'm committed to

every episode of this or at least as long as quarantine goes. So we start the next episode. Osaveda from Oz, his name is Miguel is at the bar with Jack. And he's his best friend. We know this because Miguel says, I'm your best friend. He they're they're talking about Rebecca and Jack brings up that kids at school call Randall Webster, right? Like his race is bullying. And then just out of nowhere, he says, you know, sometimes it's hard to see the woman I married, which I think like maybe there was a copy paste error in the script writing. Maybe there was an editing error, like just editing the actual episode, because that line shouldn't follow the previous one unless like Mandy Moore, Rebecca is the one who came up with that line. She started

bullying her own son by calling him Webster, which I don't know that might add like an interesting that might make her the most interesting character. My beautiful racist wife, who's mean to the son that she agreed to adopt with me. But yeah, Miguel says, you know, be grateful for your life. You're what your wife rocks. You're what your wife is so fucking poggers. You don't even know it, even though the scene takes place in 1980. Yeah, I'm thinking you're what I yeah, I'm thinking you kind of won the freaking life wife lottery. Okay, by now, everyone talks like Greg proves for some reason. The Kevin, the actor, he had a blow up at his show because they ended up cutting the bad dad scene. And he has a fucking blow up at the in front of the live studio audience. And

it's a viral video. He goes into his agency. And they're like, Kevin, you suck dick at acting. You have to like be nice to the president of the studio so you don't get fired. We find out that that Kevin makes $3 million a year, and that he his agents think he's totally talentless, which I mean, like, I don't think the writers or anyone had the ability to show this that there's a lot of there's a lot of comedy to be mined out of like bad acting and bad actors. But because these shows are just like rushed out and NBC shows and BC shows are like, it's like having kids in the in the medieval era. It's like you'd have to have like 12 because like 11 of them are just going to fucking die right when they're born or they're going to get killed by a bear or they're just going

to stub their toe and that kills you in 1411 for some reason. And there are 500 fucking billion NBC shows made every week. And they're all called they're all shit like this. And, you know, one will go on to survive. And in this case, that's this is us, which is like, that's like the fucking Charles the fifth, Carlos Pimao of NBC. It's the great conqueror, because it's in its fourth season right now. It's a vicious tyrant, but we'd never do anything cool like Charles the fifth did, which is try to kill Martin Luther. It will just slowly keep driving the mothers of America insane. Anyway, so we go back, you know, Kevin goes home, saying that with Kate. And Kate's like, you just need to get epic with the pedophile that runs the network, like you have to say I'm not doing the

manny anymore, because I'm too good of an actor. And he demands that Kate come with him because she gives him confidence. And they love each other because of brother and sister. And yeah, they're just they're going to watch out for that party, they're going to get epic. Jack and Rebecca have a fight when he comes home, because he's an alcoholic. Nothing really there. This is another scene that is probably been I've seen in like 500 fucking NBC dramas and sitcoms. We go to Randall's house. And Randall is literally running full speed on a treadmill at like 11 p.m. This is this is like the the only thing they could think of for this character was genius, perfect millionaire. Oh, it's time to do my equivalent of having a Scotch. I'm going to run. And so this is also

it. So this is also because no one who wrote the show has ever known a good person in their life, or if they did couldn't recognize what made them a good person. They're like, oh, you know, it makes someone like morally upright. They love cardio. All right. The idiot actor Kevin, we cut back to him. He has a meat. He goes to the party. And he blows it by being like, he's just like, I want to act. And the the network president talks about how he wants to like own an island to fuck children, not the second Barbie literally talks about wanting to buy an island, which is, you know, it's it's sort of like a vision board for the people that write the show, but not accusing anyone of anything. Parody, joke, joke, parody, parody satire.

Do all he's doing that. Kate and Toby, like the Toby coaxes her to the dance floor where he keeps getting epic. And he's like, oh, I'm going to I'm going to be the fucking epic dancing fat guy. And Kate gets self conscious because she thinks people are laughing at her. But then Kevin decides to get them really drunk. Okay. Nothing really to add there. We go back to Randall. He's probably just suffering with the worst hangovers life from doing too many pull ups. So his wife is afraid of letting him go to Zumba because of what a dark road that will lead him down. He will be sucking cock for hi it instructions. It's a it's a vicious path for Randall. His wife, his wife suspects that their dad Randall's dad who has moved into their house is using

drugs. And she has a confrontation with him, you know, after he gets home one day. And she gives this whole thing about how Randall's so good. And she literally says his vice is goodness, which seems like it should have been like a note in the writer's room when describing this shitty character. But they just like the they just sort of whoops all buried it into the fucking script. And she, you know, asked like, where do you go during the day? And he's like, Oh, well, I have a cat that I'm taking care of at my old places. It's the only thing I have. And she's like, Oh, I was wrong, you're not doing drugs. And she says, I feel like a bitch. Randall walks in and starts laughing. And this is this is one of those things that like I I see

and I'm like, this kind of sucks. And probably literally 30 million people love this scene. And get malware using Bonsie Buddy to send each other emails of like camcorder recordings of the scene to all their nephews and nieces. Oh, also in this scene, we learned that the failed ad, he named his cat Clooney. And he literally says it's one of those ironic names. Yeah, everyone, everyone in the fucking world is just like some sort of fucking pudgy guy who went to Tish in 1996. Everyone is like you man, literally every fucking a guy who fucking like a band in like a band in his son 40 years ago, and it has like overcome crack addiction. He's just like he's just he talks exactly like you. He talks exactly like every fucking guy who like went to

a Kamala Harris fundraiser. He's great proofs. Everyone's great proofs. I wrote God fuck you suck my dick man here. Okay, we go back to the party. And Kate and Toby have this tender moment where he's like kind of being epic, but he's kind of being like I love you and Kate's like, we doesn't say I love you, but like who cares. But Kate goes it's always going to be about the weight for me. And that's the thing that's like keeping them from having sex is that she's like very self conscious. And then Kevin pulls up. And he's like, Yeah, I fucked up my my thing. I'm going to move to New York to become an actor. Okay. Okay. We cut back to Jack and Rebecca. Jack is sleeping in the hallway. And Rebecca comes out.

He's like, Why are you sleeping here? Because it's after the fight. And he goes, I don't like being far away from you. I just yelled shut up at my screen at this point. Then he says like, Oh, I'm going to stop drinking cold turkey. She goes, you can't do that. And he goes, I will. All right. So then there's just like the ending sequence of everyone, you know, past, present, future, whatever, fucking around, like, you know, showing they love their kids and like eating cereal, but in a way that shows that they love their family. Oh, but we're at Sterling's house. Guess who shows up? It's age accelerated Mandy Moore. And it's Miguel, the best friend. Acevedo, you piece of shit. Mackie should have killed you. Fuck you. Oh, does this mean I'm sorry,

I shouldn't call Miguel the character Miguel Acevedo, but that was the shield such a better show. I'm just going to be thinking about it. Acevedo cucked his best friend or Jack died at some point or some shit, I guess we'll find out. Wow, man, this really took a lot fucking out of me. And I'm just going to keep watching this shit. I really can't believe the fucking committed myself to this. A few thoughts, a few thoughts in closing. So we've noticed that these are two, with these are just two episodes, right? Just two episodes. And the shit we have is my crackhead dad abandoned me at a firehouse and now he has cancer and we're reconciling. My wife is is giving birth to triple. It's one fucking died. It's just like all horrible

shit. It's all horrible shit. That's like the common denominator I've noticed with like every network drama show or even like a lot of basic cable shows. It's just a constant barrage of fucking awful things happening to people. Just cartoonishly awful. Like to the point where like if you watch it, you've seen it on network TV or like basic cable, you'll laugh when a character says I have cancer at stage four because it's just the writers running out of ideas. The only interesting thing they got is like five tragedies happening to like two people at once. It's their only idea. But if I can get if I can think of what the New World Order, the Denver Airport, John Hick and Looper, the Bilderberg group is doing here. All right, so we know Law and Order,

right? Law and Order is like an incredibly entertaining show. SVU even better. Everyone fucking loves Chris Maloney and Mariska Hargitay. Just wonderful, wonderful to watch. Very soothing. Like it's just like you leave it on the background. It feels great, but you're like gripped a little bit. It's like fun tight storylines. But it's sinister. Tens of millions of people watched it and it made them implicitly all the way. I mean, Americans already conditioned this way, but it helped them like implicitly start trusting cops, more trusting police departments and federal law enforcement. They're like, oh, we need to, yeah, we need to tap everyone's phones. We need to read everyone's shit. We need to, we need to like just be able to kill whoever we need to detain

somebody forever because you watch enough of this shit. You watch enough things where it's like, oh, literally every, every person is a pedophile serial killer. Or anyone will just murder for any fucking reason. It makes you insane. It just, it alters your level of expectation for the evil of the common man that you're like, yes, no, every cop's Chris Maloney. They're not just like a hot dog necked idiot that will just like find the first fucking black guy or they're not like fucking jackbooted fucking ISIS agents who terrorize families and sexually abuse them. No, it's like this, this handsome guy and this really pretty woman who are both like charming and mortally upright. And you're just before, before you know, you just, you're just fully

along for the ride. You would, you will sign off on anything they do. You don't even, you didn't even notice it happening to you. But what is, what is, if I was to read like the, the Illuminati purpose into why their counterpart, like the drama, the family dramas like this, why everything is just like, you have cancer, you, oh, you're, you, you were a band, like just a barrage of tragedies and misery. Well, I mean, one thing you could think is, yeah, the writers don't have any ideas. They can't make characters interesting at all to save their lives because they have no concept of what makes someone interesting or likable or even just compelling. Even someone you kind of hate, like what makes you, why do you think about them that much? They can't think of that. They're not

talented enough. They're not interesting enough people themselves. They haven't lived that interesting of lives. It's just, it's just the only way they can write it. Or you can think the second thing, which is like, this is sort of, this is sort of like, you know, how Victorians would just be obsessed with like diseases that weren't real. Or, you know, people before that would just think they were constantly at risk for demonic possession or witchcraft. Or you'd even think like, you know, women in the, in the fifties developing munchhouses by proxy. They're just like, in people who lead, lead very comfortable, sort of stayed boring lives that they, they have to imagine just horrifying terror and misery, either out of boredom, that they're not aware they're

experiencing, or out of this guilt, like, oh, I don't deserve this lifestyle. So I have to, I have to think of the world as this more chaotic, evil place than it is. In some ways, because the world is a chaotic and brutal and evil place, but for systemic reasons, but people don't want to confront it in that way. They have to think of it as like, all human evils manifested as random crimes. It's manifested as like, you know, like in law and order, just every, everyone's a pedophile serial killer. And so all this comfort and wealth that I have, it's not that I'm undeserved. I'm just like one of the only people who isn't, you know, literally a demon. Or, you know, I am, I am staying vigilant against evil. This is my friction in life. This is my struggle,

making sure my children who are like the most surveilled, like protected, comfortable fucking people, statistically, like ever in humanity, making sure they don't get abducted. And that's, that's the second way. And the third one, and this is, this is my crackhead idea I came up with, you know, we're recording this at 5.30 a.m. It's, it's that it's the kids that this is made by the Illuminati to beat people, to keep people beaten down, to make it so that even when they escape, even when they're watching fictional characters, they're like, oh, see, everyone, everyone who also gets cancer all the time. Everyone else's life is like fucked up as fucked up into moralizing his mind, but they rise above it because they love their family. And it's guys like, you know,

Ken Olin, or just whatever fucking California Democratic Party super donor barnacle pieces of shit who are involved in these shows, who are just looking down at normal people, their fellow Americans, and going, look at pieces of shit. Life's not fair. Well, yeah, the lives of these characters that are invented, they're not fair, they're tough. They have hardships too, but they don't, they don't demand that the state, you know, pay their hospital bills. They get through it because their brother and sister, their father and son, or their, their, their, their wife and husband love will overcome everything. And it's, it's, it's a fucking Judy and punch puppet show made by evil rich satanic pedophiles to do in front of normal people to make them think that

none of their problems are noteworthy and that they're, they're, they're in fact just B storylines. They're B stories. They're secondary to like the, you know, to the, the main plot. And you could just get over it. Closing. I mean, you choose what you want to believe here. I'm more inclined to believe the second thing, but maybe there's a little bit of column, column three in this, no? Maybe there's a little something to like horribly disconnected, shitty people trying to imagine a normal person's life is like people who would balk at the idea of ever paying a 70% marginal tax rate on their unearned wealth. Who, who mask it by saying things like, I'm actually a Bruny's lift. It's them going to come on you pieces of shit. I don't know. Maybe there's something

I don't know. Maybe there's something there too. I don't know. Maybe I'm, maybe I'm just like completely mentally ill from being on the road for six weeks and then being inside forever, like everyone else is going to be now, but I don't know. Hey, there's something from all three columns. I think that's the case as always, like Matt and Trey said to close it out. I wanted to compare what happens in the show, the dialogue and the dialogue is, it is potentially the worst part of the show. It's terrible because things that are like, like I alluded to, like things that are written as like character notes, like, oh, his only advice is goodness or just said out loud. It's just, you're just beating over the fucking head. There's, there's, it is the most contempt you can have for

your audience. It reminded me of something very specific and it's very specific, like personal cringe. And the thing it reminded me of was being 13 years old, being on AOL instant messenger, talking to a girl and when we were talking about our parents, me saying, I don't want to become my father. Like, what did I think I meant? I mean, I had definitely seen it in a TV show. I had definitely seen like a cool adult who has sex saying it. I was like, oh, this is a thing you say to women to make them think that you're, you fucking got something to you. You're like self-aware and you're very serious. You have gravity. Not knowing that it's like, that's guys talking that's like already like shitty writing, but it's about guys who are having kids

and don't want to like replicate things that their father did while raising them that they think, they think like scarred them in some way. Like, what the fuck did I think? That sucks so much. I know it was 13, but I'm fucking beat red remembering this. It sucks so much. It sucks so fucking much, but that's what every line in this show is like. It's just like, oh, oh, here's something that I've like a serious person would say. Just drop it here. Just fucking put it wherever. Oh, and also the guy saying it, we've decided that he has stage four cancer. Oh, yeah, no. The character here wants to get into alberth and he's an alcoholic. Okay. Yeah, no, I mean, if you like this or you hated this, I did want to, I was remembering that while I was watching

this and it sucks so much, but it's so fucking embarrassing and funny. I decided that it was something I had to give our audience that they could enjoy. Every like, everyone needs something to get them through these times. And I hope that you can find 13 year old me saying to a girl in eighth, when we were both in eighth grade, I don't want to become by father funny and also evocative of the NBC show. This is us. All right. That's it for, that's it for this week. I don't know how frequently I'll be doing these at least once a week. We're going to add to the rotation council of dads next week. I am fucking dreading it. This is already been fucking brutal. And I can't believe I'm going to add another fucking goddamn thing. All right. I'll see you soon.