CheapShow - Ep 357: To Thrift And Buy In LA

Episode Date: November 3, 2023

Years in the planning, CheapShow is finally leaving the UK and heading across the Atlantic ocean to explore the city of angels itself, Los Angeles! In a very special episode, Paul and Eli explores the many nooks and crannies of LA in an adventure that takes them over an extremely large, and particularly varied city. Along the way, they'll take a walk along Santa Monica pier, explore 3rd Street Promenade for a thrift store, hunt for the Winkie billboard location, try to escape Hollywood and a few other odd surprises too. Paul thinks being in LA makes him a better person, Eli doesn't believe it and just wants to find a place to have a smoke! It's Part One of "The LA Trilogy" of CheapShow adventures! Alt CheapShow Theme by @noiselund See pics/videos for this episode on our website: https://www.thecheapshow.co.uk/ep-357-to-thrift-and-buy-in-la And if you like us, why not support us: www.patreon.com/cheapshow If you want to get involved, email us at [e-mail] And if you want to, follow us on Twitter/X @thecheapshowpod or @paulgannonshow & @elisnoid www.thecheapshow.co.uk Now on Threads: @cheapshowpod Like, Review, Share, Comment... LOVE US! MERCH Official CheapShow Merch Shop: www.redbubble.com/people/cheapshow/shop www.cheapmag.shop Thanks also to @vorratony for the wonderful, exclusive art: www.tinyurl.com/rbcheapshow Get hold of Spunk.Rock’s exclusive CheapShow 300 Artwork: https://www.redbubble.com/i/t-shirt/CHEAPSHOW-EST-2016-by-spunkrock/115961855.WFLAH.XYZ www.instagram.com/spunk__rock Send Us Stuff: CheapShow PO BOX 1309 Harrow HA1 9QJ

Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls of all ages, welcome to Cheap Show USA. I'm Paul Gannon. Why are you doing that voice? Because I'm doing it professionally for fucking once, aren't I? Bit of class, jet-setting international podcasters. It's the big leagues for us now, we're no longer in our fucking dirty flat in London. I beg your pardon? In our shitty, horrible fuckfest hole.

Are you including your flat in that? My flat is not included in this conversation. Fuck you. How about that? No, how about that? You start off with some crappy pretend radio voice. It's not pretend, they're working radio. It's the voice I always use. Ooh, ooh.

Okay. Well, two can play that game. Girlfriend. We won't gonna come out. Anyway, hello, two can play that game. Girlfriend. We won't go on a coma. Anyway, hello, welcome to Cheap Show. We are in Los Angeles. All right, fuck off then. We're on Santa Monica Beach, everybody. We are. So, we're starting our audio adventure here, but we've been here for about a day now.

Yeah, I'm still very, very jet-lagged. I'm getting nausea and sort of sweats. I just feel out of place out of time paul out of out of my zone it's also because it's really warm here we just came from a really pissy miserable month of england i didn't manage to change my pants yet but don't let that disgust you okay anybody disgusts me by the way because all he keeps him up it's just a fucking piece of cloth in front of my balls that's all you said they you know when how your hungry nuts go scrub a scrub over the years on the on the gooch and there's no there's no gusset left on these pants whatsoever so hold on bubba gump is that what you're saying you got a bit of a bubba gump going on right now huge bubba grump mate mate. Hey. Oh, what?

Should we go over there? No, let's walk and talk. I like it. I'm losing my breath. I'll talk then. So, look, we are in Los Angeles. We've just walked from the Santa Monica Pier. We're in Santa Monica.

And over the next few days, we're going to be recording bits and bobs, a scrapbook, if you like, of audio. And then there's no real agenda. There's no plot. There's no characters. Because it's different audio. I feel like you have an agenda. And you know what your agenda is?

The no agenda agenda. I have a no agenda agenda. And basically, there's going to be no theme. Eli's eyes have come out on stalks. Because it is a very attractive. Just for balance, look at some men. And go, oh, what a nice willy he might have. I'm het.

You know I'm het. Yeah? You know that. And I'm bi. And together, we fight crime. As het and bi. Oh, don't. Honestly.

But I did want to make one point about Santa Monica Pier, which even though I stayed in Santa Monica several years ago, over 20 years ago, we didn't get to the pier. You know, I lived here for years and I never went to the pier. It's like that, isn't it? It's like you don't go to the pier, do you, generally? No, you don't. It's like Brighton Pier on

steroids, isn't it, basically? It's bigger. It's just a sort of trashy... No, what it is, Brighton is like Santa Monica on meth. That's the way you want to look at it. Because this is what a proper beach has to be. Sand, sea, sun. You know what I mean?

Where's Brighton? I mean, on a good day, beautiful. I'm not knocking Brighton at all. But, you know, it's a stony beach. Stony beach. It's that kind of thing. It's different. Where is Venice?

What? Venice Boardwalk in relation to here. That way. Almost like a mile in that direction. Yeah. Because, like, Muscle Beach in Venice is all that way. like a mile in that direction yeah because like muscle beach in venice is all that way so we are doing did he just call say ron howard for no reason did he think i was ron howard yeah you look a bit like ron howard i don't because he's old and tall and bald and ginger i'm not ginger you are kinder in this light you look the strawberry

blonde is coming out mate strawberry bond look see. Look, see, Venice Boardwalk. Yeah, that's why I said. 34 minutes, does it say walk? Yeah. This is not a walking marathon podcast. This is a Explore LA series of episodes. Can we talk about the flight? Let's sit on this wall and talk about the flight.

Bear with us while we adjust. Hello, everybody. It's tube show time. My name is Paul. Yes, that's mine. Let's sit on this wall and talk about the flight. Bear with us while we adjust. And over there, I won't let you guess, because I'll tell you when you hear it's Paul Gannon. Chief Showtime, Chief Showtime, Chief Showtime, ooh-ooh. Chief Showtime, Chief Showtime, Chief Showtime, ooh-ooh. Hey, everybody, it's Chief Showtime. It's the time of the week where it's yours and mine. Oh, yeah. My name is Paul Gannon, that's Silverman. Eli J, what you say? Come on and come right in Every use of me good shows me out of time

Clap, clap, clap Use of your good shows me out of time Boom, boom Chief Showtime Chief Showtime Chief Showtime Is that alright? It was okay. Right, we found a wall to sit on, so we're sitting on a wall because we're not beach ready. I was going to have brought me flip flops and me shorts and we could have gone on the beach, but we didn't, so we're sitting on a wall because we're not beach ready i was gonna brought me flip-flops and me shorts we could have gone on the beach but we didn't so we're sitting on a wall now we're

gonna explore third street promenade which is have where some shops are and such and we're gonna look for some thrifting for our guests that we're recording tomorrow that we're in our pants about eli thoughts tell us about the flight in Eli, thoughts? Tell us about the flight in. As cyclists go past on their cycle bikes. The flight was booked through British Airways, Paul, but the carrier in the end was American Airlines. Yeah.

And the seats were very cramped. And I'm a small guy. They were very cramped, weren't they? Yeah. Very cramped. And I'm a small guy. They were very cramped, weren't they? Yeah, yeah. Very cramped. And Paul got a bit confused. He booked the tickets, of course. And thank you. I do thank you for that.

I just want to say that. And I'm not having a go. No, it's a go. Just get to it. I'm not having a go, but I am kind of having a go. And then, before we go on, you said something about, I got you a low-sodium meal. Yeah.

And you didn't really justify why you'd made that decision. Because when you get the app, it says, you can book your meal now. And I thought, well, you must have to do that then. So I was like scrolling through. But they don't give you meals. They give you types. So it was like vegetarian, vegan, or like something else and something else. And then one of the options was plain. One of the options was plain, and the other one was low-sodium.

Because I think you're a very unhealthy man, as that cough and your cigarette has just proven to me, I was right to pick a low-sodium meal for you. It's nothing to do with my sodium intake, having a cigarette, though, does it, Paul? And don't be all mightier than now. You'll be having one of these in your bum hole. You'll be smoking with your bum. There we go.

There's something about when we turn the microphone on, No, I won't. In your bum hole. You'll be smoking with your bum. There we go. I don't know what you're saying. So, there's something about when we turn the microphone on, you become a weird monster. Unless there's a guest, in which case I keep stum. Yeah, you do. You get shelled right up. I shelled right up. Now, so, Paul got a bit confused, it's safe to say.

You don't have to, you just get the meal that they're going to give you if you don't select one of the special options. Yeah. Okay. to say you don't have to you just get the meal that they're going to give you if you don't select one of the special options yeah okay but you thought it was a necessary part of the process to select the meal which it wasn't so we got our meals first which is which was a boon because we got our sodium in one plane what's called it ended up being a beef stew horrible thing literally like you know i know airplane food and whatever but my word it was terrible being a beef stew horrible thing literally like you know i know airplane food and whatever but my word it was terrible so this beef thing was really underwhelming i couldn't even eat more than a few mouthfuls of it and you got um was it a vegetable tagine or no it was something it looked like a rabbit had been sick in the box next to a pile of rice it's what it was

which was the vegetarian option. Because we ordered specially, they brought them out before everyone else's. And then we sort of picked at it and thought, oh, this is a bit shit, let's skip it. And then they announced what the options were for everyone else. And the option was, there's a vegetarian tagine, which obviously doesn't sound good, but the normal meal was meatballs.

And that sounded good, man, after I'd seen that stew a meatball is something that could work on an aeroplane you know you can't go too wrong with meatballs unless you eat one and get the shits but apart from that the flight was overall fine it wasn't as if there was rowdy babies

screaming, there was someone who was letting off non-stop at first my fingers pointed to you I did let off, Everyone does, come on. I didn't. You held it in on an airplane. No, I didn't need to fart the whole 11 hours. I do not believe that.

Meanwhile, I'm sitting in literally a human pipe organ of guff. Sitting there, pop, pop, pop, pop. And there's like different tones of it as well. No, mine weren't bad. No, yours were bad. Yours smelled like copper pipes with dog dirt in. His were, mine weren't bad. No, yours were bad. Yours smelt like copper pipes with dog dirt in. His were worse, weren't they, Paul? His were worse.

His were like cloying, like properly smothering. Cloy, shitty. Like an unflushed toilet kind of nastiness. And then his wife would get out her spray and start squirting around it. And that was suffocating as well. And they were just annoying people. What about his headphones running upside down as well? It bugged me that he put his headphones in with the...

You know, like, it's meant to dangle down. The Y was pointing up, so it was like... And I was just like, you fucking... And the first thing they did when they landed was check their phones with the football results. Rugby. It was the rugby. Which apparently was an exciting match. Who gives a fuck?

England got knocked out. Either way, they were boring cunts. And they've gone probably straight to the fucking boring part of LA and won't leave the hotel for three days. Anyhow, to finish the food story, and then you get the smaller meal, the snack, I think they call it, towards the end of the flight. Ice cream.

We got an ice cream. That was the best thing. That was the best thing. That was nice. A little tub of vanilla. And I dipped it in my coffee. Yeah, that was nice enough. Nice.

But then we had the snack and again the snack was something different because from everyone else everyone else had the choice of barbecue chicken wrap yeah but I think that we did the better thing in the end anyway I ended up with a if you can believe this a chickpe go. A chickpea curry lattice. Now, I thought, I took one bite. There's some, I'm against lattices in food. I don't think, I think a lattice should be something that you grow ivy or an ornamental vine on

and not something that you put food in. It's like tryptophobia of the mouth. It's got, it's a geometry that shouldn't be uh associated with food and it was it was disgusting what was your wrap you didn't even open it no i had that egg frittata or whatever that was the best thing on the whole flight it was actually the best thing i ate on the whole journey and it was it was basically a credit card sized piece of egg vagina frittata okay so so anyway we got here fine. We are... Do you reckon we could say?

I mean, we're staying with a guy called Brian Wecht, who's graciously let us into his family for a few days, and we're staying with him. Graciously. Graciously, thank you. And if you know him at all, you know him as Ninja Brian from Ninja Sex Party, the comedy music group.

And yeah, we're staying with him, and he's been giving us some handy hints. But for us right now, because of our guest, from Ninja Sex Party, the comedy music group. And, yeah, we're staying with him, and he's been giving us some handy hints. But for us right now, because of our guest, we're going to explore Third Street. We have to do that quick, mate, because we need to get a train back to Hollywood. We'll go into that later, the metro,

because that's a whole other thing as well. It takes fucking forever. It takes forever. And it's full of, like, poor people, essentially. You know, there's not the mix you get on on london no everyone who has any money at all out here drives yeah so i mean it goes to show i mean someone drinking a big bottle of malt liquor on the on the tube and lots of people asleep who obviously were just kipping there was that guy who was like the dormouse in alice in wonderland you know every now and then the dormouse pops out of the teapot i go where am i then slowly

loads the lid back down it's like there was a guy like that he wasland. You know, every now and then, the Dormouse pops out of the teapot. I go, where am I? And then slowly loads the lid back down. It was like there was a guy like that who was sat on a chair. And every now and then, he was like bent over asleep or something. And then he would just raise his eyes up. And then pass out again. And then pass out again.

It was like that nightmare. It happened to me, like I say, once when I was at an all-night thing and ended up on the Northern Line. And I woke up at the end of the Northern Line when it terminated. Oof. And then I got back on the Northern line and went all the way back down.

Because I passed out again. It's like you can't remain conscious. You can't sort of... No, you can't. Hang on. I just want to take a picture of that sign, Eli. I just... We had to take some pictures and some video.

Again, there's no real rules or structure to our journey here today. But we're going to give you all we can. Right, I'm going to sign off for now. What are we doing now? We're going to look for what? There might be record stores or thrift shops. Hopefully on 3rd Street, so we're going to have a little look around for that now

and see if we can pick something up for tomorrow. We're going on the Pedo Bridge over the... I don't think it's called the Pedo Bridge. It's just a bridge that will take us across the road, the PCH, across PCH to 3rd Street. So we're going to do that now. And again, we'll join you back a bit later. We don't know where, we don't know when, butch to third street so we're going to do that now and again we'll join you back a bit later we don't know where we don't know when but we're in la we're

doing it we're here thanks to our supporters on patreon as well so thank you all and let's hope we have some interesting adventures ahead of us see you later hey air cal makes flying easy. Easier than United, Western, or PSA. Here's another way. Greater comfort. Air Cal has increased legroom on all Boeing 737s over 15%. The other airlines charge exactly the same. But only Air Cal gives you first-class legroom at low coach prices. So enjoy the extra luxury of Air Cal at no extra cost. Air Cal. We make flying easy.

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These are your NEC big dealers. Right, well, we're heading back to the station now, the Metro line, because we're going to walk around Third Street. Time is not on our side. We want to explore as much as we can. So we found the Goodwill store, thrift store, and your thoughts, Eli? Huge, mainly clothes. much as we can. So we found the Goodwill store, thrift store, and your thoughts, Eli? Huge. Mainly clothes.

The brick-and-brack section was ravished by theft and was incredibly pricey. Yeah, I mean, spoilers for the next episode. Actually, you're not going to too many spoilers, but we bought some things for our guest episode. And what I think would come to about a tenner ended up being about $25, $26

which is steep for the fucking stuff we got really and the quality of it it's not as if we were getting high end gadgets or anything the clothing and the sunglasses as you might expect in a sunny state California were good and they were good prices on the sunglasses so you live

you learn Paul one thing I can tell you as well, you get off the main drag and everywhere stinks of human feces and piss around here. Doesn't it? There's a little bit of that. That's the problem with LA in a nutshell.

You pop off, see something beautiful, turn down the wrong street and it's like, ah, let's get out of here as soon as possible. But, I mean, people are friendly and chatty. That's true.

Especially the staff in the shops. Very nice. Oh, well, if there's a train, we should probably run for that. Oh, I'm not running. Oh, right, friendly and chatty. That's true. Especially the staff in the shop. It's very nice. Oh, well, if there's a train, we should probably run for that. Oh, I'm not running. Oh, right, we're not running. But anyway, this is just a little update to say we've done a bit of shopping. This is the end of the line, isn't it? We're at Santa Monica Station at the end of the line on the E line.

We're going to Hollywood now. And every time the announcement goes, you're on the E line, I feel like. Yeah. I keep thinking it's saying Eli. I hate the reminder that you exist. Mate, I'm standing right here. I hate it. I absolutely thinking it's saying Eli. I hate the reminder that you exist. Mate, I'm standing right here. I hate it. I absolutely hate it, mate.

So we're going to run for this trade now, or a trade. I'm still feeling the real effects of jet lag. We only came in yesterday, so I suppose that's to be expected. I'm not feeling too bad, though. I feel nauseous. My whole digestive system isn't working properly. Exhaustion, and then, you know. Hyper awake.

Yeah. Yeah. Either way, that's our day. It's our day so far and now we're heading. We're going to go to Hollywood. We're going to go to Hollywood and give you a report from Hollywood. I've brought my actor's CV with me. It's laminated.

Do you think I could go meet some producers or something and then just give it to them there? Yeah, yeah, yeah. But go into a shop there. Can they pass it on to like Spielberg or someone like that? Everyone who runs a shop in Hollywood has a close-knit connection to a John Landis, a Joe Dante. Landis isn't working.

Neither is Dante. You're a... That's why every fucking shop owner has a connection to them. Yeah, that's my point. Is that neither of those two directors you just named have made a film in years, have they? Joe Dante did a film recently. Did he?

Or he worked on Creepshow or something. They're still doing bits and bobs, but mostly producing and doing podcasts. They do podcasts? Yeah, Joe Dante's one's quite good. Anyway, that's our report for this part of the walk. Bye, everyone. See you in a bit from Hollywood. Holly weird, more like.

Am I right? I don't know. I haven't been there yet. Well, let's find out. See you. Holly shit, more like. Yeah, maybe. Holly smell of piss. Holy shit.

Right, well, it is just gone half five, and Eli and I are just walking through the back end of Hollywood. How did you find Hollywood? It's, um, it's kind of depressing, but, um, look, this is the Scientology. Mate, there's loads of them.

We're looking at a window here, a shop window, and there's a whole case full of L. Ron Hubbard novels. Loads of them. Is this a Scientology building? It must be. Because you were saying they own loads of the real estate rounds here. Yeah, for no real reason. Other than to kind of... It's almost like fake it till you make it. Oh, look, the Funk Brothers star.

I've been looking at all the stars, because this is the stars. And it goes for miles. So, can you do me a favour, Eli? Just check the back of my bag a second and tell me what you think you see. The back of your bag? Yeah, you see my bag? What's missing? So, you know I had pin badges on it.

Yeah. What's missing? That badge. He stole that badge from you. Right, so, we were in Amoeba Records, right? I'll just do the... I can't believe that. You've got a hundred of them.

I've got a fucking hundred. But it was the first one out of the bag. What a fucker. Let's go back and explain the story. So, me and Elo were just in Amoeba Records, right? Which you were recommended. Brilliant, brilliant. I could spend a lot of money and a lot of time in there.

Yeah, we nearly did. I've got some 7-inch singles and I bought a pin badge. And I bought a haunted mansion book and a pin badge of my own of a haunted house. However, when I was going, just before cashing out, I was in the queue and there's this guy going oh, what's that badge, mate? Is it Ghostbusters? And I was like, no, that's something I've designed for my own thing, blah, blah. And I kind of gave him a potted version of what the badge was. And he goes oh do you sell them? No I don't. Do you have a website? No they're all in Britain. Sorry mate. Oh oh. And I'm waiting in the queue and he's standing there.

And then right now before I noticed the badge is off the bag. And I was like he's fucking nipped it right off my fucking badge. Of the bag. What an absolute shitbox. Yeah, right. Hello. That's a weed shop. Jesus Christ.

Oh, what gives that away? Is it the big sign saying weed shop in gold paint? The other thing is I've been looking for a bit of the old legal cannabis. One shop I went in, they said I needed to show ID. Oh, Weeke and Croft, there's no said I needed to show ID, so it... Oh, we can cross, there's no... I needed to show my passport. She said it needed to match my card, my debit or credit card.

But then there was a sort of van on the street who sold me one joint of what he called Delta 9. He was saying it's real weed, it's real weed, but it's these other cannabinoids which are legal not quite as strong as thc delta 9 and delta 8 and he said it was that delta 9 but it was only it was one joint for 10 bucks so even if it's fucking nothing i haven't been you haven't been hoodwinked out of it he just said and he didn't want id he said oh i believe you're over 21 it's like yeah no shit sherlock but yeah i mean at least he didn't have to ID. He said, oh, I believe you're over 21. It's like, yeah, no shit, Sherlock. But, yeah.

I mean, at least he didn't have to dance for a hoop to get it. But then it was a van on the side of the road. I don't think they were up to the same rigours as a weed shop or whatever. But they've given me a lovely gift bag for it and a lovely sort of tube with the joint in. I mean, a lot of packaging. So, yes, and that's the other thing. Just the last thing just the last thing on the cannabis

Paul the smell is constant up here in Hollywood yeah yeah yeah but I tell you what we'll do we'll go one road over and down and then we're going to

get an Uber back to the sanctuary but look if there's one thing not that it's not been like this

since when I lived here 20 years ago but like the homeless situation is fucking crazy here and you know people think of hollywood glitz and glamour they think like that at all they think it's some you know beaches and rich people and playboys and it it's not it's like there are vast swathes of likeates and buildings. The smell of urination, public urination, all over the place. I don't want to sound like we have the best homeless in the world in London. That's not what I'm framing it like, but there's something really unique about the homeless here.

Well, it's because it's California, and it's easier to be homeless because of the climate here, isn't it? So people, you know, if you're going to be homeless anywhere in the world, it's better than being in London, because freeze your ass off in London yeah but at the same time it's like there's a there's a sense of a I don't know how to describe it but like the filth that I saw this one guy before and like his hands and feet and face were just black with soot and oil or whatever it is. And it's really sobering in a really fucking dark way. Because right now, we've walked, what, a quarter of a mile, if that, away.

And look, posh houses. Yeah. It's like the Columbo scene almost, you know? Yeah. It's all residential up here now, isn't it? And we were going to look for for the winky billboard today because i know where it is but then even from where we are in hollywood it's one road over to sunset and another 47 minute walk and we were just like not today mate maybe another we'll have to

wait i think we should just get a taxi right there and then take a few snaps and jump back in the taxi maybe another day i'm actually feeling a bit of a burnout now because you know we've covered quite a lot of ground today and i'm still very jet lagged yeah we we landed yesterday afternoon i remember so yeah yeah we're trying to get every sense of this journey out of us so we don't feel like we just sat at our mate's house for four days and come home and so we've got our big guest recording tomorrow. Fingers crossed. Fingers crossed it does not end horribly and embarrassingly for us all. And, yeah, we're off.

No, I'm pleased. I'm very pleased with the records. And we went to Santa Monica, and I've never been to Hollywood. Everyone want to go again? No, not really. Not really. It's er, it's sobering like you say. Because it is just nothing but like, er, like tourism trap stuff isn't it? It's like badges and t-shirts and posters. It's like the wrong end of Oxford Street on steroids, basically.

Fuck me. Yeah. And even that guy we just spoke to in the morning, I thought he was a gentleman, because he looked quite well-dressed and stuff. He even asked you for money. And then he was like, can you have three dollars for a meal? And I was like, Christ.

So I don't know, mate. There's parts of LA I really love, but it's so big that I think the kind of troubling outweighs the... Well, where we're staying, it's really lovely, actually, around there, I think. I mean, it's nothing grand or... Not special, but it's just a nice... It has a nice feel. Yeah.

You know? So, we're thankful and very thankful that we're there and we're heading back there now. And that's it, really, for our report. I don't feel funny. That's for sure. Are you still feeling a bit dicky? Yeah way dicky yeah like I've got a dicky. Dicky battle. Anyway so synagogue oh yeah and what else is anything else to report anything else we need to mention?

Oh we were on the transit. Oh we're were on the transit. Yeah, again, coming back. One of the lines was over the ground, but it's the stank of human defecation and wee. Is that the B we were on? The E line. E line. Isn't it funny how the one that sounds like your name is the one that smells of piss and shit? With your fucking cloth, loincloth pants situation

that you've got going on. That's loincloth, that's the word. Yeah. These have degenerated into loincloths. It's like, take your pants off and your fucking shirt, you look got going on. That's loincloth. That's the word. Yeah. These have degenerated into loincloths. It's like, take your pants off and your fucking shirt

and you look like Tarzan. I've done a fucking hack. I modded my pants, mate. Yeah. So I think the plan is now we've just got to find a little bit of... Because if you didn't want

to get an Uber anywhere near Hollywood, I think that would have been fucking crazy. We're quite far up from Hollywood now. Yeah, so... We're going to find a corner here

and then we're going to grab an Uber back now. So that's all for tonight. What? We both need wee-wee. I think I can hold it until we get back. You can hold it until we get back. I think I can. Why do you need to?

How long of a drive do you think? It's about 20 minutes tops. Oh, really? Yeah. It's close. Oh, yeah. Okay, great. Yeah, I can hold it as well then.

Cool. Well, then we're going to both hold our piss until we get back to our residence tonight. We might do another recording. We might not. We don't know. As I say, this is very ad hoc, this recording session while we're away. We just need to check all the technical details for tomorrow.

Yeah. The recording tomorrow. And just the kind of fatigue you only get through jet lag, basically. Yeah. The kind of fatigue you only get from going, let's get up dead early in the morning, be knackered by 10 o'clock and then head out the door to do things. I was knackered all day, Paul.

But we did, you know, we've put some miles in. We've got some steps in. We did some thrifting. I've got some steps on my watch, which I'm sure would be great had I turned it on when we're doing all that frigging walking. But no, there we go. Oh, what you're...

Yeah. Honestly. See how nice it is around here, though, how the grass is trimmed and... Yeah. No, that bit is... Woo! It's actually scary. Yeah.

I would go as far as to say it's quite a scary... And look, I wouldn't want to be here two hours from now. When it's dark? Yeah. No? Do you think you'd get mugged, basically? hours from now when it's dark yeah no do you think you get mugged basically it's not that it's just like okay so let's just say you go out to the theater and that's you and that's where you're going to and you've got to go to your parking

space through that yeah it's kind of like as we're saying to you'd think they would pull out all the stops to clean up that area and make it more alluring to tourists but i don't know tourists go there anyway everyone flocks there anyway because it's so famous i mean you learn again to compare to leicester square or something it's an absolute shithole you know i mean with a stupid new park in the middle yeah anyway anyway i'm gonna break wind oh not again i accidentally crop dusted when I was in Amoeba Records. Oh, there we go. You wouldn't have heard that. Okay. But Eli's going to smell it.

I'm not. You are. I'm going to walk in front of you. It's a breeze, don't. The breeze is coming at me. Stop trying to crop spray me. Crop dust. It's like that scene from North by Northwest

with my arse flying over you in your Cary Grands. Thank you very much. Anyway, so that's the only time I'll ever get to... He was a big acid freak. Do you know that? Oh, yeah. He was a part of bringing the whole acid culture into, like, Hollywood parties and stuff. He lived out here and his psychiatrist or whatever,

his shrink... Yeah, was like, go on. Gave it to him. He loved it. He fucking loved it. Right, Hollywood and Vista. I think this is where we should... No, that next one's a proper junction, so we'll do a proper junction.

Gardner. Yeah, that's a proper junction. We'll get more luck there. That's fine. So here we are. It's nice and calm here at least. Yeah. See what I mean?

I didn't want to get an Uber there because where would you tell them to park? Where would you go and collect it? It's all bad. Ah! where would you go and collect it? It's all bad. Fucking double barrel blasted in with some ass gas. You can... Ooh! Ooh! That has a temper to it, mate. It does have a proper angry temper one. We'll never be true professionals if we do too much fart stuff.

I think we're past that. We just need to embrace our filth. Right, Gardner Street. We're going to get our cab from there. Hollywood and Gardner. Perfect. And there's a bench we can sit on while we wait if we need to. I don't know. All right, cool, cool, cool.

And I'm going to message Brian saying we're heading on back so he can prepare accordingly. OK. I expect a red carpet. That's well in the land of the red carpet, aren't we? Yeah, true. Although mate, my pants might have a bit of a brown carpet now. Very good. Right, well we'll see you in a bit everyone, as we sit on this bench and order a taxi by the

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If you want a sailor box, go see Cal. If you want a brand new Dodge and your driveway or garage, go see Cal, go see Cal, go see Cal. Well, it is Tuesday. Yesterday was a day... I don't know what the timeline with this podcast is. Because we recorded an episode yesterday. But this episode that we're recording right now will go out before that. So should we tell people what to expect now?

I don't... Who are you? I'm Eli Silverman. Hi, everybody. Here we are on a fantastic pedo bridge. Don't pedo bridge. Please don't make it sound like a place where paedophiles hang out, mate. They probably do, don't they? Well, it is near to a theme park, so yeah, maybe.

Well, where are we, Paul? This is Universal Studios Tube Stop, essentially, right? Yes. So we've decided today we are going to walk about, and we've got a few plans. We're going to try and find the Winky billboard for Eli, because I went last time. You haven't seen the spot where it took place.

We're going to do that, but we're going to make a nice sojourn on our way down there, and we're starting at Universal Studios. Not because we're going to the park, but because they have a place called City Walk we can get some food and start there and then we're jumping back on the tube line which should be a nice traumatizing morning experience for us all no hopefully there won't be too much defecation or naked homeless now and human tragedies since we you last

heard from us we've got an Uber from Hollywood Boulevard, right? Yeah. And Paul was running up and down like that travel dad from the Fast Show because the app kept saying a different pickup point for the Uber. But we literally ran all the way like 200 metres down and then back again. And you were like, come on, come on! You freaked out then back again and you're like come on come on you freaked out paul and you shouldn't have freaked out but a little bit of a johnny wobbler yes i did because i was because he said your attack is going to pick you up there and i was

like well that's two blocks away yeah but you should always just ignore that and give it a and especially as as we were walking off we noticed the actual car with the number plate. It was barfing right there. Anyway. So that was fun. But then we got back fine, and we did a big episode. I'll just tell them, because I think this part of the stuff we're recording now will go out before that episode anyway. But basically, yesterday, the only thing we did was we set up the studio where we've been staying with Ninja Brian. And we recorded a special episode with a very special guest. And that guest is Tim Heidecker.

Comedian, actor, singer. He has been a big influence on us because, you know, we rip off on cinema quite a lot. So it was a pleasure to have him and Brian on an episode. You're going to hear that next week. And I think, considering how nervous we fucking were, that turned out all right. I do think it turned out all right, Paul. Both of us were really nervous.

It's that thing when you're in a... You're not at home, you know. Already we're in a sort of, you know... Foreign environment. In a foreign context. And then someone who's a professional hero of yours is going to turn up there and then you know so well dealt dealt with you did go a bit word salad 100 miles per hour that's kind of

par for the course for me really isn't it that's what you that's the quality ganon content you're expecting a mouth garbage fuck face tongue man bastard tongue man bastard and perhaps it's your subconscious um having a go at you, because in your sleep last night, you bit your tongue, didn't you? I bit my tongue. I might have a little bit of a... today, on my speech. Yes, you do.

But don't worry, Paul. Everyone's here for you, and you have your ragged tongue mouth injury. Well, I'll tell you what we can talk about, what we did yesterday as well. Actually, actually, is Brian said, hey, do you want to go see some of the crazy Halloween

decorations these houses have? Yes. Topanga Valley, is it? Yeah, basically. No, no, not Topanga Valley. That's way far away. It was Pasadena. Topuca.

Mate, that's just not, this is, we'll never be on Heidecker's League now. You fart. He doesn't do that. That wasn't me farting. That was that naughty duck. Come here, naughty duck, come here. Oh, that naughty duck. No. Orville, Orville's followed us out. We went to Pasadena, because there's like a kind of posh area where a lot of celebrities have houses out there, and interestingly enough... It wasn't Pasadena. It was. We didn't get to Pasadena, my friend. Ventura? No, it was Topanga Valley.

It's not Topanga, because that's way, way over there. That's in the hills. Anyway, it's an upscale part of LA, residential, and obviously there's a tradition of extremely elaborate Halloween decorations outside the houses. And there was loads of other people doing it, the tourism, wasn't it? I think they post lists online and stuff oh yeah like a map you can travel to all these houses that go over above and beyond for their decorations but a lovely thing to do in a lovely cool uh temperate evening you know my favorite one one house had music playing and a dry ice machine as well as

the skeletons i was into that one it really felt like being on a Ed Wood film or something my favorite I mean we didn't get out for this one but I like that Beetlejuice display with the whole sand words coming out of the garden and I mean we'll have pictures for all of this of what we took but effectively we got to a point where every other garden was this huge elaborate light show and there was like a place called Lily Hall which is like nothing but pumpkins and it's like a really kind of spooky old haunted house look and one of them where apparently we were we spent some time trying to find um a giant pumpkin display like a building height but they have changed their uh display and it was much more sci-fi themed there was a big they had a huge inflated moon and they were projecting a

video of David Bowie performing Space Oddity on onto it brilliant all that 50s atomic age sort of it's a weird sci-fi could he had like a gourd from the day the earth stood still a Yoda and like they also had a table with a TV showing the black and white TV showing. Yeah. And so really elaborate. And like, as I say, something you just don't get in the UK at all. I mean, maybe there are one or two houses that go out, but like it's whole communities out there that share and spend a lot of fucking money to do so. So this is just a little catch up.

Is there anything else we need to mention in our catch up? Amoeba Records. Did we talk about that yet? We did yesterday. We went to Amoeba Records. Also, we. Yesterday was just our catch up Amoeba Records did we talk about that yet we did yesterday we went to Amoeba Records also we yesterday was just our fear about Tim Heidecker

then doing Tim Heidecker and then recovering from Tim Heidecker it warmed up it started to go well with Heidecker and it was cool lovely to meet the guy

it was funny because I said he came in and we all shook his hand we were all very he was wonderfully polite there was no sense of I'm lo loathing myself to be here. He didn't have to do it, did he?

No, he didn't. So we had this whole situation where he came in, and I thought, this will be a nice breaker. And he went, so thank you for coming. Honestly, I'm nervous now, because when I sent the email, I fully expected you to say no. So when you said yes, you kind of ruined everything for me. And so he giggled, and I was like, he likes me no but he did start with his arms crossed a little at the beginning yeah i mean you

know it's just it's slightly uncomfortable he's just total strangers but it's like i think that it's his attitude of being open to do a lot of stuff which is reflected in his career and i think it's a great it's a great um of working, you know, because you never know what's going to happen. So the other thing we did yesterday... is that a roller coaster castle? Is that the park? Is that Universal? No, that's the Bowser castle for the Super Mario Kart ride. Right, so that is the theme park, essentially. It's not the main Universal theme park, it's Nintendo World.

It's the newly built Nintendo World. Oh that looks cool, I'll get a shot of that. With the other thing we did... Oh mate. What? get a shot of that. With the other thing we did... Oh, mate. What? Here's that naughty duck. Get arrested. No, don't. It's fine. Get arrested.

No, if I pushed any further, it wouldn't be a duck. It would be a dirty brown otter. Close to the edge by the band, yes. Yes. Down by the water. Now, the other thing we did yesterday, brilliantly, is we went to the Topanga.

Is it called the Topanga? I'm saying Topanga. It is so far away from where we are. What was the tiki bar we went to called? Tiki Hut? No, the Topanga Hut. I swear to God, if you say Topanga one more fucking time. I don't know, but we went to a tiki bar with Ninja Brian.

It was fantastic. We had two tiki drinks, and I was completely blotto, like dangerous levels of blotto. It's funny as well, because I got this one called Mojave Punch. Yes, Mojave. And I got it first, and you got one, and he got one. But then in the second round... We all got the Mojave, because it was nice.

Very fruity flavour. The gin up front, and then a sweet, full-bodied, sort of melony almost flavour, you know? Yeah, yeah. Lovely stuff. And I had, what did I have? A ginony almost flavour, you know? Yeah, yeah. Lovely stuff. And I had, what did I have, a gin ricky tiki tarvy? Yeah, whatever that was. It's a gin one.

I liked it. It wasn't quite as good as that, because I try to avoid rum usually. Sometimes with the funkier end of rum, I find it a bit off-putting, you know? Yeah, yeah. But anyway, what's the name of that tiki bar, for God's sake? We will mention it later in the episode when we do some research.

The Cowabunga Hut. Yeah, do some research the Cowabunga Hut it's called the Cowabunga Hut we just thought we'd do a quick little update today our plan is to kind of wander we're going to head to Culver City, we're going to head to downtown there's a few bookshops, I'm going to introduce you to the Winky location there's a bookshop near Sunset Strip we were told to go to

it's a one that Brian recommended this morning yeah which is called? The bookshop. I don't give a jack shit about anything. I need to get some cannabis in me, and then I'll start remembering stuff again. That's the absolute opposite of what cannabis does.

No, for me, it helps with memory. Does it? Yes. It's like the guy who says, oh, a little drink before I drive really helps me. Gives me a big dick as well. Does it? Cannabis.

Full balls, big dick, great sharp memory. So what, it's like spinach to you? Yes. You'll get your Popeye out. Alright, but we really do need to get some food. So we're going to head into City Walk now and just go a little bit of a shop and get somewhere to sit down and have a break

and that's the plan today. So, with that in mind, join us for another leg of our Hollywood wanderings. Yeah. Hey, yeah. See you in a bit, boys and girls. You join Eli and I as we sit near Chateau Marmont, the hotel just there. Oh, that's the Marmont.

Yes. On Sunset Boulevard as we walk towards the location of the Winky billboard, which I think we'll get there in like five minutes or so from here. Paul, why is there a volume, like a huge fake volume reader on the back of that billboard there? I don't know. The little Netflix billboard. I mean, funnily enough, this goes into the Winky thing itself, where like Sunset was known for its billboards,

and like this is one of those, a minor, elaborate billboard, right? It's very elaborate. Look, it's got a working needle. Is that a volume metre? It's like a... It's a decibel metre. I doubt that has any real effect on anything. No, I'm not saying it's a working one,

but what is it portraying is a decibel metre? It might... I don't know, actually. I don't know, MHS, that's... That's... Hurts, or... I mean, mate, you're getting into the weeds or something, it don't know, actually. MHS, that's... That's... Hurts or... I mean, mate, you're getting into the weeds or something, that doesn't matter. All I'm saying is it's probably TV... Well, the whole fucking show doesn't matter, Paul.

All right. Nothing, you know, what the fuck matters? What matters? Go home. Go home. I can't get home from here. Go home, sit at the fucking airport until the flight goes and fuck off. Anyway, Chateau Marmont was a place built to replicate like the chateaus of France and Europe.

Yes, it has that look, doesn't it? But they were originally bungalows for the rich and famous. And then when the money ran out, when Hollywood changed, it became a hotel. And it's where, famously... That's not bungalows. A bungalow is... No, it was. There's a whole complex in there, mate. Oh. That's just one part of the building that you're seeing here now. No, there's sort of, on the hills behind it, there's bungalows. No, it was. There's a whole complex in there, mate. That's just one part of the building that you're seeing here now. On the hills behind it, there's bungalows, are there?

But do you know why it's infamous, that place? Murder? No. But there is a death involved. Is it where...? We were literally talking about it an hour ago. John Holmes? Why not John Holmes? Belushi.

Oh, Belushi. That's where Belushi had his snowball and died. He didn't die there? Yeah, Bungalow 13. Oh. Cool. At least I hope so, because I'm pretty sure I read up on it before we came out, like landmarks we could go to. They do ghost hunting nights there very rarely,

but you see it on these haunted nights, and then you read the actual history of the thing, and not one single article goes, there's a ghost in that building. Right. It looks like the type of place where they'd say there were ghosts, though. Of course, because it's got that

ghost Disney haunted mansion vibe to it, kind of. Well, we've had a big, long trek up Sunset Boulevard. I've enjoyed it, Paul. We walked from Hollywood, where we were the other day, which was, you know, I still contend, one of the most depressing places I think i've ever walked through but sunset has a as a vibe it's it is run down and a bit grotty but it has a sort of funky vibe it's enjoyable i have to say the closer we get to the the trendy section of sunset the more it kind of

moves away from the grimness of it all and becomes a little bit more i don't know cosmopolitan yeah more financially and there was a lady walking behind us talking about her royalties and stuff so it's quite showbiz around here isn't it there's a bus here number yellow orange m bus we can't use this with our pass by the way because we only bought a metro line oh so the tap doesn't work on the these no because we've got a tap which is the equivalent of an oyster card you get in london yeah but in london the oyster card will get you on the buses as well of course yeah it won't do that here well because there's a there's a cap on it right so effectively i mean that's the thing we traveled on it that day and we only spent four dollars and we traveled quite a fucking miles miles and miles

from literally behind the hills all the way up to uh santa monica santa monica yeah whereas in london uh we'd be talking 20 quid flat out for that i reckon right should we get do you want are you smoking then i thought we were going to walk let's walk i'm going to put this out so we're near winky we're heading to w. I think we're about five minutes away. Well, maybe a bit more. But I just want to get a conversation started because this is where sunset becomes the sunset people have in their heads. Because the real sunset is the one we kind of carefully tiptoed quickly through earlier on.

Because seriously, I think we were saying... Do they call it Glitter Gulch? Oh, that's the first I heard. I think it's, yeah, I think it's Glitter Gulch. It's the rock and roll equivalent of the film, you know, Hollywood. Yeah. Because we passed a few, like, guitar shops and Hollywood photographs of the rich and musical.

But what I was going to say is... Rock photography, that's what you're trying to say. No one walks, no one really needs to walk in LA, unless, frankly, you're poor. And it's that thing we've noticed where the metro line... I don't know if this is a racist thing to say, but we were the only white people on the train, any of those at the time, yeah.

Not that I have to complain, I'm just saying... There were Latino people, weren't there? Yeah. And, you know, obviously people who work in the service industry. Oh, hello. Inspector Gadget's coming past. Take a picture of the Chateau Marmont at some point. Oh, here we go.

Oh, it's a big red fire truck. It's exciting, isn't it? Oh, they must be coming for me because I'm too fucking red hot sexy. Don't frust me. I frust you. Oh, yeah, all the billboards. There's loads of billboards up here. And Eli went to IHOP and had a rancid bacon.

I had their breakfast sampler, it was called. You got country ham, which is gammon. Yeah. You got two big pancakes. You got two link sausages. delicious, two eggs, I had over easy, and two rashes of bacon that smelt of fish and were rancid. And I'm really hoping it doesn't start to... The last thing I want to do is once again go to Disneyland with a friend and spend half

the time clearing up their arse mess. Really? Is that what happened last time? When I went with my mate Dave when we were teenagers, he ate chips, right, that he thought had mayonnaise on. No, it was the birds on the branch above shitting on his chips and he kept on eating it. What was wrong with his fat mouth? Well, he'd also put sauce on it as well.

He ate the whole bag? He had a big chunk of it before it all started coming back up again. And he literally just started to, ah, that's horrific. But the saddest thing right was apparently my dad had to go into a bathroom with him nearby in Disney

and it was going everywhere apart from the toilets and my dad had to use an empty soda cup and scoop up all the chunks and pour it into the toilet he didn't have to

he could have left it to the staff he could have but I think my dad quite rightly went no one needs to deal with this I'm going to do as much as I can

so yeah long story short Mr Silverman I hope my dad doesn't have to get a soda cup to scoop up your arse mess yeah oh yeah do the marmont try and get that sign in as well so it gives it context right go landscape yeah go landscape mate when well in doubt go landscape but there is a certain kind of unique hauteology to some LA buildings which yeah because there's no consistency to any of the designs of these buildings there whoever's taste dictated the design at that time in that period of time as well but it's all it's all faux it's all fake it's all faux. It's all fake. It's all like aping what sort of an American in the 20th century thought

was like a sort of French chateau style. Well, that's what it goes back to, the whole idea of the modern idea of what a haunted house looks like. It comes from the rich Americans in the late 1800s building faux Gothic mansions and castles that quickly ran down because they lost their money couldn't keep up with the upkeep fell into disrepair and then got a reputation for being haunted because they were abandoned and so a lot of these buildings have that same vibe but because

they're in LA they've never really crumbled away in the same way apart from when the hills will eventually collapse at some point the buildings come down with them yeah it's all very fin de siècle fin de siècle oh i think we're actually real close to where bit winky was well i'm looking out for the we're crossing roxbury here yes because i think there's a hotel nearby called the standard i keep the other car i can't remember we'll figure out when we get there but it's opposite that and jeff Olan, who we mentioned in the documentary, emailed me today. What did he say? Can we meet up? Oh, busy.

We're really busy. He was saying if you look at the... Well, what would we get out of it right now? He wants us to work for him on his winky documentary, doesn't he? Yeah, it's a bit awkward because I think we've discovered that he wants to work on something himself with a person who can get a netflix deal which you know is hollywood speak for i'm just saying this anyway out loud on the hopes that it will happen but i would i'd rather not i'd rather not work with him directly because i think there's a bigger story than just

his experiences there but yeah absolutely anyway anyway so we are walking now we want Dr Winky himself we want the doctor is in uh so yeah oh live girls nude nude nude no girls girls girls oh I know I read it as nude nude nude mate I like how these strip clubs have like, like fake Greek art statues outside as if that instantly is class, yeah well, as if that's instantly class. Oh, there's a pub called the Naughty Pig. The word sexy is a suggestive more than literate. Yeah. Stop. Well, nothing happened then, I don bottle of water, please? Stop.

Well, nothing happened then. I don't know what you're talking about. Do you want it right now? Yes, please. All right, give me a sec. I'll tell you what, I'll pause this one sec. We've accidentally found it. We're right here.

This is it. The sign that says the fall of the House of the Nepo Babies is the winky sign. I think it is, because it's at the hotel. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on, hang on, hang on, hang on, hang on, hang on. I think this is it.

This is it. This is the billboard. Well, they lived on that. Was it any wider? Well, look, because it was different. I mean, this is a completely different build than the one that was there all those years ago. Yeah, and I think that was the building

they stayed at for cleaning themselves. That was the boning pad. Well, yeah. Unless there's a place around the corner. Let me have a quick look. Yeah, it could have been this apartment complex here at the side where they... This is definitely it.

This is definitely it. This is definitely it. The reason why I didn't spot it is because when I came last time I was on that side of the road. And I remember doing my little video there. So yeah, this is the billboard. This is where it happened. I'm going to touch it. Touch it? I mean, as I say, it's figurative, isn't it? It's funny, isn't it? I'll tell you what I want to do right now before we go any further

I want to check my YouTube I want to check the video and make sure this is the right place but I'm pretty sure this is it because the landscape's changed completely since 84, 85 Yeah but you were here do you remember that?

Yeah, yeah, yeah but again 2019 I came past last and I just want wanna make sure this is definitely it before I get confirmed but I think that's the hotel I remember it being next to and yes yeah yeah this is it this has to be it we're gonna come back in a minute bear with What's he laughing at? I have no idea what that guy was laughing at, because whatever was coming out of the speakers didn't sound funny. Anyway, so we've double-checked,

and yes, this is the exact same corner it happened on we are in the right location it is sunset and sweets avenue which is funnily enough right next to a freddy fast birds pizzeria place which i presume is there to advertise the new movie oh it's a fake it's just a sign they've put up or they can actually open a oh you know what it could be right it could be just an elaborate billboard using a shop as a... Yeah, it's a fake pizza front for the new Fat Freddy 5... What's it called?

No, you're right. Fat Freddy 5 is the name of the film. No, it's not called Fat Freddy. Five Fat Freddies at night. What's it called? Five Fat Freddies. It's not called Five Fat Freddies. It's called Five Freddy Fat Fingers.

It's called Fat Finger Fuck My Mum Freddies. Fuck Mum Fanny Fanny Finger Fanny Fanny. Finger Bash My Finger Hole. Knuckle Punch My Clit At Night. How about that? Yeah. Yeah, we got it. So, here it is in... Five Nights At Freddy's. Yeah. Five Fingers Up Freddy's Mum. So, here we are on the corner. And you can imagine it would be intolerable being here for six months. Did they have any shelter? No. You saw the video.

What did they do? Well, I mean, that little... Where did they take a shit? See those apartments there? Behind those bushes? They went there to take a shit? That's where they went for a shower, take a shit, and apparently drugs and sex as well, with people who were interested in doing so with

certain peoples. It's grubby. It's definitely grubby, but you know, we can only go by what he says. We can't say that. People have needs, Paul. I have needs. I'm a man with needs, Paul. How has this helped me? What am I getting out of this? I'm not trying to help

you. I'm just saying I have needs. So what we're going to do though now, because there's not much we can do, it's just nice to finally be here. Is that all you've got now? Yeah. No, it is good to be here, Paul. We've made it.

It was a long walk. God, I'm hot. I think I'm going to get baked right now. I've got swamp nuts, mate. I'm going to get baked right now. I've got swamp nuts, mate. I'm going to get baked on legal fucking weed. Why? Did you bring it with you?

Yeah, of course I did. I'm not going to smoke it around in the house, am I? Oh, mate, I thought that was a Greg Turkington thing just then as well. It looks like Greg's tour van, doesn't it? Is there anywhere like a little park or something? No, there's not really, mate, to be fair, around here. There's maybe somewhere we can find it. We'll have a look.

But I want to go around the corner because around there there's a few things to look at. And that bookshop's here as well, nearby. Okay. Give me a hug. We've made it to Winkie's. Come on. Let me give him a hug. I've got needs.

I told you I have needs. But we also have to do a video version of this and pretend this is all new for the first time. So we found Winkie. We're here. We're good. Huzzah. Do you take a picture of me? Low angle looking up at that.

All right. Right. And then we're done. So we'll catch you a little bit later as we go further on our LA jaunt. I hope you're having fun. I'm here. All right. I'm coming here.

Daddy is all being tough. Look at me. I thought I'm looking at the sign. Okay. meant to look at the sign. Okay, point to the sign. Look. Lower your hands a bit. The fall of the house of the neat fall baby. Now pull your hand towards you a bit.

Yeah. Yeah? Yeah, because it's just, I want to silhouette your hand. Yeah, there you go. Okay, cool. There you go, mate. A bit of a fall, happy with that? Right, let's move on and do something a little more interesting instead.

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Sunset Strip. A lot further to be fair. A lot further we popped into a bookshop The Book Soup. Had a little look around. It was pretty she-she wasn't it? I mean it's a nice selection but one of those ones you know with loads of really expensive gifts in amongst all the books. Yeah well it's like but like... Yeah, but it's what it is, right? A lot of bookshops are like that. But we saw a much more interesting bookshop a bit further on, which we didn't go into. Mystery Pier.

Which had all mystery and paperbacks, but it was down a little alley. Yeah, it was all kind of creepy and you got frightened, didn't you? I just thought, I don't want to be the only person in this bookstore. Being judged that you're never going to buy anything anyway. Yeah, but I would have. Because I love, I'm looking for that. There's all sorts of stuff I'm interested in.

Noir crime stuff from the 60s. Well, hopefully we'll find it when we go to Culver. Which is available out here, which was literally never published in Britain. Yeah, we'll go to Culver. We'll see how it goes. So, we are heading back now, but I wanted to take you past Mel's driving. Diner. Well it's strictly speaking Mel's driving.

Drying in is it? Drells mining. Drells drymiling. I'll kill you. You'll kill me what? With both my hands. You don't want to get down here? I'll strangle.

You don't want to get down here? I'll kill you with both my hands. This is the shishy neighbourhood. This is the shishy bit. Bring down the tone. No mate. I'm not want to get down here? I'll kill you with both my hands. This is a she-she neighbourhood.

This is the she-she bit. Bring down the tone. No, mate. Wherever we walk, we leave a stain behind. It's what we do. Speak for yourself. No. I speak for both of us.

Speak for yourself. Don't speak for me, OK? You're a dirty little shitter, mate. You're a grubby little monkey. Just because my camera's hanging out. I don't want it falling out. Or what notary. Oh, thank you. I'm a prick.

And you're the big baby who can't go into a bookshop. Big baby can't get book. Can't man judge him. This fucking thing. Why won't you go in my bag? Fucking thing. Why won't you go in my bag? Fucking thing. Oh, there's a Warhol. And look, there's a Brilla.

Cornflakes. Is this like a Andy Warhol thing? What are you doing? What are you doing? What are you doing? Taking footies. don't i didn't give you permission you're not just my likeness trying to be funny i need to we need to get more drinks that's because mate listen to everyone while i've been here not been smoking can handle

my drink not been bitten by mosquitoes eli oh oh it's hung over i had two drinks last night oh that weird that smoke you've been a big baby haven't you little big baby did your mom shut your mouth how about that whereas I've been like living the LA life bish bosh ding dong bish bosh ding dong that's literally what that guy who who that guy yes mate finish your sentence you little that programme, driving around with Peter Kay. Paddy, but Paddy. That's what he fucking says. You sound like Paddy McGuinness.

I may sound like him, but he didn't say that. He does, he says stuff like that. Oobish, bash, baa, twat. No, he says things like Nicky Nacky Noo and shit. Yeah, which is very close to you going, bing bong, my goodness. Yeah, but you like that guy who goes Nicky Nacky Noo and Cricker Cracker Crew

wherever the fuck it is who eats outside of chip shops at the table. What's his name? Rate My Takeaway. Ding Dang Do or something he says. Yeah, he does say that.

Cricker Cracker or Nacka Me Cracker. You should put on a 12 stone and like me Nacka Crackers. Why don't I just put you on my back and put you under a t-shirt

and get the same effect. Look, there's Mel's driving. We could have gone there but you wanted to go IHOP. And eat some rancid bacon. Yeah you had some rancid IHOP bacon. Equinox. The third eye. I don't know what all these things are. That's a big building size poster for the new Marvels. Marvel film. Marvel, Marvels. Well, it's like we've said before. Sunset Strip was the place for billboards. It's notorious for it. That's a huge one. It's quite impressive, just the scale of it. Reasonably impressive, yeah.

But I've seen bigger, mate. I've never seen Inspector Gadget as big as your arse. It's quite empty. Is it open 24 hours? Yes. You could come here at 2. Cool. 2 or 3. Do you want to have something here, or do you just want to get to Culver? It's up to you, mate. Do you want to eat?

No, if I'm being honest, I couldn't. Really? Yeah. I mean, I'd like... Let's get to Culver, we can have a bite there. Yeah, maybe. I was just kind of looking forward to it a little bit. Maybe we might get a chance.

Maybe we'll get a chance. Because it's not going to be that bad getting the cab here. No, I guess not. Maybe we could just for a laugh get a midnight cab. That's what I'm saying. Either way, we'll see. So look, did you get a picture of the logo and shit? Do that, because otherwise they're not going to believe

we came to LA. And what I don't want are people accusing us of fraud. We could be on High Street Chem right now. We're not on High Street Chem. We could be on High Street Chem right now. We're not on High Street Chem. We could be on High Street Chem right now. You don't know that. They don't know that. Fucking listening.

This is just a terrible angle. Go behind the... Stand here where you can... No, stand exactly here. And the sun's right behind the sign. I'll fucking do it. You useless prick. Watch me do a great picture now.

You can judge how well they came out on our website. Here we go. What a fucking great picture that is. That's a great picture. Eli can get fucked. I am Daddy Gannon Cool, sweetheart of LA. Have all the ladies love me, all the gentlemen want to be me, and they see me walking down the strip, and they know who I am Daddy Gannon Cool, sweetheart of LA. If all the ladies love me, all the gentlemen want to be me,

and they see me walking down the strip, and they know who I am. I'm a big Paul Gannon, and I'm driving a van. And my van goes bing, and my wheel goes bush. And Paul... Shut up, I'm doing a funny rhyme. You're not doing a funny rhyme. Everybody knows Paul Gannon's on time, cos he's the cool cat, meow. The cool cat of LA, he is the cool cat, meow. The cool cat of LA, he is the cool cat meow the cool cat of la he is the cool cat wow the cool cat

of la he is the cool cat there's a jelly there oh so you want to go to the deli but you won't go to mel's get a sandwich get a sandwich from mel's couldn't you i'd prefer a deli sandwich you're just in you're ingrate you're ingrate i'm trying to give you i'm trying to give you a american slice of good Americana. This looks really good. This is my Americana. Do you mean it looks fucking good? It's sterling. It looks good, doesn't it, this place?

How... How is it... You've just seen the outside table. You thought, that's good. It does look good. Go on, have a look then. Have a look at the fucking menu. Right, I'm cross now.

So I'm going to turn this... I'm just going to turn this off. You've ruined this, Dan. Turn it off, you big cunt. Do you know what it is? You've got nicotine withdrawal. I don't. I don't.

You only bring this up. I'm saying, if you bring this up as an excuse for the things you just don't like me saying, say, oh, Paul, it's just nicotine. I'm not in a bad mood. Shut up. It's just that you're an ingrate. Let's get something here.

I'll have a sandwich. All right, OK, fine. Well, unfortunately, we could have had a real Hollywood experience there at Mel's get something here. I'll have a sandwich. All right, OK, fine. Well, unfortunately, we could have had a real Hollywood experience there at Mel's Drive-In. Go there, then. Have a look at the menu. If they have a sandwich there, what do you want to eat there? And Cheap Show will pay for it. How about that?

OK. All right, then, Paul. You fucking ingrate. You dirty fucking ingrate. Just listen. You savage. You fucking mouth savage. Fuck you.

Food goblin. Let's just get... Right, we're going to Mel's driving. We've been walking for about an hour, mate. Oh, is that a tough problem for you, is it? Yeah. Is it a tough problem? Is it a tough problem for you?

Honestly, you need to eat. You're getting grouchy as fuck. Grouch you up, you prick. Right. I'll give you... Anyway, let's have a lovely time in Mel's driving. Drive-bys, dives and bars. What's that show called?

Diners, Drive-ins and Dives. Drive-by, Diners and Drive-bys. Right, we're going to go in Mel's driving. Drive-bys, dives and bars. What's that show called? Diners, Drive-ins and Dives. Drive-by, Diners and Drive-bys. Right, we're going to go in. Have fun. See you in a bit. Mr Silverman, Mr Silverman. Hello. I'm Paul Gannon from Cheap Show News at one o'clock.

I don't see why I should be nice to you at all. Why? Because you've just been a cunt to me every time you turn that thing on. Honestly. I'm sorry. I time you turn that thing on. Honestly. I'm sorry. I saw you warming up for it. Did I just buy you a lovely meal at Mel's Driving, which was my suggestion? People of the cheap show bought me a lovely meal.

But I have the card, don't I? No. So it's me, does it, isn't it? You're so toxic. Listen. Just shut up. We've gone, basically. Just so everyone knows where we've gone.

We were on Sunset. We had a lovely, lovely... Thank you, patrons, for the meal. But didn't you have a lovely... Tell them what we had at Mel's Drive-In. Oh, yeah. We had grilled cheese sandwich with short rib. Nice stuff.

Incredibly rich. And they gave you... We both went for the coleslaw as our side. Good choice. And it came with a little pot of creamy horseradish, right? Yeah. I've never had that before. That's really nice.

Really lovely touch. Very rich, but delicious. Wasn't it? Extremely umami. Very nice. Umami. We've got a pin badge from Mel's driving. Again, pictures on our website, thecheapshow.co.uk.

Oh, I think we made a walk away. Fair play. And now we're in Culver City. So Culver City. It's very film industry, isn't it? Because we just walked past the Sony lot. Sony lot. And this is a lovely old deco cinema here.

Yeah. Which is no longer a cinema, I guess. No, but this is all new. This is all fake. You think? No, I know. I know this is all fake. This is all built around the Culver City Sony studio lots.

And it's like a fake kind of... Oh, that is a cinema? Yeah. Oh, cool. But I don't think any of this is all that old we could watch The Creator mate er no

why I don't want to spend my time doing something here we could do at home but what about that film what film The Creator we can watch that

at home though can't we what do you think is it going to be good I don't care this is not a fucking movie review podcast I'm not wasting my time well what do you want to fucking this is what I mean? I don't care. This is not a fucking movie review podcast. I'm not wasting my time.

Well, what do you want to fucking... This is what I mean. Because I want to tell me stories about when I lived in Los Angeles. Oh, you've ruined it again now. I have not. It's your accident. Every single fucking time we do a walkabout, I remember when I had a willy wash around there.

I remember when Daddy took me to... When I had a willy wash around here. Is that what you said? Yeah. Have I actually ever said that? Yeah. What, my Daddy... I remember when my daddy washed my willy around here. I didn't say that.

No, I didn't say that. Daddy was coming out of your mouth. The word daddy. Daddy did come in my mouth. Go on, tell the story. I'm really thirsty. That's the thing, Paul. Well, buy a big water fountain as well with a magical man.

All right, can you just tell the story? I'm getting a water. Oh, right. Okay, well, there's a thing there. Wet willy. Or just open your mouth and go under the fountain, Eli. Open your mouth under the fountain. Oh, Rob, Rob, Rob, Rob, Rob.

Yeah, that's fucked off. It's all right. I'll tell you a story then. So, yeah, 2019. You might even see it if you're a Patreon supporter. I put the video up here on Patreon. But this is a... Well, there's shops and shit.

Mate, stop being impatient. There's a big fountain there. I don't know if it's picking... I mean, it is picking it up. But it's like a wizard or something. And a ball. I'll take a picture. I'm going to take a picture.

How about that? Watch this. Oh. It's like a lion or something. A lion, like a wizard in this water, dancing around it. Right, done it. I kind of don't want to tell the story anymore. I will say this. The last time I was here was the last time I spoke to my ex-wife,

who won't be named because she doesn't really like that kind of thing, but I thought we were going to meet again while we were here, and a nice catch up because even though we did depart our ways in about 2005 or whatever it is, we were always cordial, staying in touch so the last time I was here in 2019 for the Ghostbusters Fanfest we met up in this little square, Had a lovely coffee. Caught up. Had a chat. But now, moved out of LA. Like, as we discovered, quite a fair few people.

Not that we know them. Left LA during the lockdown. The COVID lockdown. So, she was one of those ones who went away. So, now I don't know what to do. Because Eli's fucked off. We're having a nice bit of banter, didn't you think? Didn't you think?

Where's he gone into? He's gone into Chipotle to ask for a bottle of water or a cup of water. Well, that's good. He's very enterprising of him. But wouldn't we have told Culver City was a place to investigate? I mean, maybe we've gotten here quite late now, I don't know. Have you ever told your stupid fucking story?

Yeah, here's my story. Stop doing that! You fucking idiot, honestly. Do you want some of this? They gave me it for free. Oh, I did see you were quite enterprising when you went in. Oh, is that at the tap? No, it's slightly flavoured water. What is it flavoured with?

I think it's just tap water. Good. Unless the flavour is... Well, no, I'm not... Yeah, exactly. It's from the aquafresca thing. Fine. It just tastes like it's...

Oh, aquafresca means fresh water, doesn't it? No, maybe it has got that kind of straight-from-the-river flavour. Maybe. It tastes fine. I don't know. It's water. I don't know. It's water. I don't know. You're a fucking moron.

Why am I a moron, you ingrate? Don't stop. Daddy called me ingrate, but I can't deal with Daddy Willy Wash. Willy Wash. Daddy Willy Wash me. This is really dangerous territory now. Is it?

Well, maybe your daddy shouldn't have washed your willy then, should he? It's going to take us forever. No, what will take forever, mate, is if we get a car and we get an uber and we take that uber from here to there because that's going to be forever that's the forever part all right so if we jump on we're done no we're not you keep making this mistake we're on the e-line here i know we're on the all the way to seventh street and then all the way back up the b-line to hollywood but my point remains is that if we do that it's direct there's no traffic jams there's We're on the fucking B line. All the way to 7th Street and then all the way back up the B line to Hollywood. But my point remains is that if we do that, it's direct.

There's no traffic jams. There's no sitting in an Uber. There's also no paying $70 when we've already spent just a dollar to get back. Do you not think that that's the best way? Fine. Fine. Fine. Yeah?

Or do you want to sit in another taxi and listen to dance, disco, rave? I mean, I actually quite enjoyed that. We were on a lovely Uber ride down with Alexis. Compromise and maybe go to somewhere closer and get an Uber just so we're not on the… My plan was to get it to the end of where we were chained and then get an Uber from there because that would be just cheaper. Okay. Yeah?

Yeah. Christ. Yes. Yeah. Okay. Good. We've reached a compromise. We don't have a bag. Just so you can smoke round there, because you know what fucking LA's like. Look, this is a...

That's not, that's just a bollard, mate. I don't see any signs. It'll be fine. No, well then fine. Do it. And if a policeman comes, I'm running away. So... If a policeman comes, you know what you have to do in LA?

What? Wash your willy. Say, can I wash my willy, big boy. Can I wash my willy, big boy? Can I wash my willy in big boy policeman's mouth? Oh, please. You said it. No, I don't want to do this. Are you sure?

Yes, we were in an Uber. Female driver. Unusual. They were playing dance music. Black tees. Black v-neck or something they're called. And it had an interest in competitive eating. We talked a lot about beard meets food and man versus food. And Fat Sal's which is a sandwich chain here in LA, sounds good, dirty good, has this incredible food challenge sandwich that looks it's 14,000 calories

it's like eggs with cheese and chips and bacon and marinara sauce and bread and all sorts you know what

they'd have eggs in mate you know what they'd have eggs in do you know what they'd have eggs in mate you butt this will get us arrested I've ruined them all I've ruined them all.

I've ruined them all. Oh, God. Oh, you asshole. You egg-flowing arsehole. Well, I'm having fun, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls. I'm hoping you're having fun too. If you don't like that cigarette, mate, you'll kill us all. You'll set us aflame.

Anyway, look, we'll kill us all. You'll set us aflame. Anyway, look, we're having fun in Los Angeles and I hope you're having fun along with us too because we're just out here living the dream. Tomorrow we're at Disney. It's exciting, isn't it? It's unusually pedestrianised here. Yeah.

Yes, Disney, exciting. What I will say about that is we will not be taking our recording into Disney. Two reasons. I think, A, if I do, they'll take the bags and take it off us anyway. You think? Yeah, which is why I'm just taking the 360 and that'll be a video. That's so weird how you can shoot as much video as you like,

but as soon as you just record half of that, which is the voice, then that's not allowed. How is that real? Exactly. I don't know. I just get the impression if they do check our bags and see this, I'm going to have to do a lot of bullshit explaining and all that stuff. So the plan is we are going to take the 360 camera to Disney tomorrow.

And we're going to make a special video there of our day out doing that. So with that being said, yes, it's not going to be part of these adventures. But also we can admit now that we're also going to be doing a special two-part episode with Brian Wecht and Leighton from Leighton Night with Brian Wecht. And that's going to be something to look forward to. So that's going to be coming in the next week or two I think um I don't know months worth of content out of this that's all right isn't it four weeks of fun yeah that's good you've taken the vim out of me how do I put the vim in you don't I'll put the vim in just sit down will you your cup's there I can't sit close to you

we can't do our top bants if your cup is separating us you haven't drank so much water have you in a while this is really dehydrating walking around yeah really

lovely sandwich there yeah I did enjoy Mel's dining Mel's driving But I told you didn't I it was worth to go because you were like let's go to that place

and I was like no if we're going to do this let's go somewhere else and Molly was the lady who served us and you could tell she's lived in LA all her life

right she must have been what late 60s yeah covered in tats like cool tats that weathered skin look yes all her life, right? She must have been, what, late 60s? Yeah. Covered in tats, like cool tats. That weathered skin look. Yes, that's... And has probably worked at Mel's Diner since the 70s,

maybe 80s, you don't know. In London, you don't get waiting staff of that age, do you? It's not the same culture. It's a totally different culture, yeah. I mean, yes, there might be a family-run restaurant. I'm not saying good money but a wage waiting staff here can make decent money because of the tipping you know and you get regulars who you know and you you build these relationships i guess and yeah you

can make much more yeah but in london it's all like you know 16 year olds who like just want a job for the summer or whatever. Well, there's that whole thing after COVID with the whole crisis of staffing. And then you had all these really young people in hospitality venues, you know. And also, if that is how you're making your money and COVID locks down places like Mosdana, then that's a severe...

Was there a big lockdown like we had where all the businesses closed here? Imagine that. Crazy. Especially here, right? Crazy. So, I don't know. I mean, I can imagine a lot of these restaurants did a takeout service, but that still doesn't help the tipping bit, the waitresses who work there.

You know, they would have been told to stay at home. But, I mean, we're here now, and we don't live here, so we can't tell you how the impact really affected people. But you get the effect that just... You get the impression a lot of people mention it when you're small-talking, don't you? So I think, yeah, it's had an effect. It's just kind of given... I don't know, it's a vibe more than anything else, but... I don't know, mate. I like being back here. It's weird.

I'm just going to say it. There's a weird confidence I have when I'm back in la that i just don't have when i'm at home like i'm chatting with the waitress at the mel's diner and being chatty and the guy behind the counter who took the payments i'm not like that at home i just want to i'm not i'm not like that but here i'm chatty and friendly and confident and everything i wish i could really be in real life and i'm not and bullying and abusive towards your co-host as soon as you press record no but to be fair that doesn't change

that doesn't change LA hasn't if anything LA has softened me I wish I hadn't said Willie Washington about Mississippi stop doing that

you didn't hear that one let's get on the fucking tube and go home well we gotta do that so we're gonna head back now let's walk and talk let's do the walk and, we've got to do that, so we're going to head back now. Let's walk and talk. Let's do the walk and talk.

All right, we're going to do that. Well, I've taken a load of photos today. Us too. It's been a good day. Winky, Viper Room we saw, remember? And the Whiskey A Go-Go. Yeah. Two bars of infamy, in certain respects.

Well, the Viper Room is where River Phoenix famously died after coming out of doing an eight ball or whatever what do they call it a snowball

when you it's a snowball when you mix heroin it was the same thing that John Belushi died of it's a mixture of heroin and cocaine essentially in fact you could probably

hop back and forth across the street along that whole area and find a place someone died of a cocaine overdose at some point and the

whisky and we saw the Montmartre in one of those bungalows that's literally something we talked about in the podcast

but the Whisky A Go Go you were saying was kind of scuzzy and a lot of bands lived around there for the sake of crew famously

all of those groups Guns N' Roses Hair Metal right Hair Metal yes which was a massive scene obviously yeah yeah yeah burgeoned crew famously, all of those groups. Guns N' Roses. Hair Metal, right? Hair Metal, yes. Which was a massive scene, obviously. Burgeoned. Burgeoning scene. Burgeoned. It's not burgeoning no more.

No, it's bonged. It's burgeoned. It's burged. Whatever that means. So, yeah, there's not much to really do for us around here, because let's be honest, for a show called Cheap Show, ain't nothing around here cheap, sir. Pretty ritzy places like that. at that that's all it's all new money old money mingling to keep their money with themselves right although lovely it's very attractive people around here that's a very nice street to live on you can imagine as well but then yeah so here we are uh

Yeah. So here we are. Carousel coffee, I don't know. Let's, I think we should take a right by these. This is the Culver Steps. You want to go up the steps? No. Oh. Let's find, I think if we go to the left.

Oh, there's a market down there. Let's have a look. Let's come this way then. Let's do it. Mate, time is ours. Let's do what we want. It's going to get dark. We don't want to be out here. Let's get on the Metro before dark, yes. In fact, now you've said that, now I'm shitting my pants, mate. Well, let's just have a little look at this market.

Because it ain't too fun during the fucking day, I'll say that. Although, compared to New York, it is a step up. The Metro, really? Yeah, yeah, yeah. All right, we're going to investigate this market quickly, and then if there's anything to fund, we'll report back, but... If there's anything to fund? Why don't you just suck all the willy-washing all right we're done let's move on let's stop then

i'm going to but i want a bit of sound to fade out okay well don't let it go down on me mate willy wash update an important development has happened in that we have discovered there is a spirit Halloween shop nearby. Now these are buildings that sell stuff for Halloween, right? They pop up. Billions? Billions that sell? What? What are they?

What? What are they? A shop. A shop? A shop that sells Halloween stuff. Okay, you said these these are bloomin'... Don't! Stop!

It's funny how two minutes ago you were whinging about having to walk an extra half an hour, despite all the trade-offs I got you to do to come along, to see this special, special, particularly American outlet. Fine, I'm fine with it.

I can say. Well, you seem to complain a lot, don't you? For a man who is on an adventure. I've been walking for about three hours today, that's all I'm saying. Alright, that's all I'm saying. Isn't that what the content these good people want when they listen to Cheap Show, though? I don't know what they want, Paul.

Shall I tell you what they want? What they really, really want. So, just as an aside, we're now walking past Sony Studio Lot, the actual place where they have the sound stages. Back where we were, that was more for the CEOs, the people with the money to make the big deals. Here's where the magic really happens.

But it's not because it's Sony Pictures and magic never happens here. But we're going past. It's a very ornate little colonnaded row. You can tell how that Culver City was built around the fact that this place exists. It was built around the studios. Yeah. It's a historic landmark. On this site.

1915 was founded the first motion picture studio in Culver City. Thomas H. Ince. OK, it's that place called Ince, isn't it? Ince Road, yeah. 1919, Samuel Goldwyn succeeded to the title of Samuel Goldwyn Mayor. MGM. MGM. Anything else of interest?

Was once part of the vast La Balona Rancho. What does that mean? Whose settlement began in the Spanish period of California history. So basically there used to be a ranch here, now there's a movie house. They built the early studio lot on a ranch. There, funnily enough, mate, that screening there, Lowell's, that's where we premiered the Cleaning Up the Town documentary.

The Ghostbusters documentary. Right there. How funny. That's a nice art deco. How funny that we're right back here. Yeah. I'll get a photo. Yeah, do that.

Cool. That's fun. I'm having a nice little road show of my dreams. But like every little street here is named after a starlet from history. And it's got its own like map in there of where you need to go. It's a whole complex, gated.

Yeah. Yeah. It's quite amazing. Quite amazing. So anyway, we're heading off to Spirit Halloween now to see if we can pick some fun things up for ourselves and also we're going to try and get

something nice for our hosts who've been looking after us while we've been in Los Angeles so we're going to get who are Halloween freaks aren't they they are so we're going to hopefully

get a little present for them say thank you so that's what we're doing right now I only really turned this on because I hope it would spurn you with a little bit of energy once the mic comes on

I've got energy I'm okay I just you know we have walked a great deal today. Yeah. That's all I'm saying. And I'm feeling great. You just... What? Nothing.

I asked you a question. You need a cigarette pole. You need a fucking cigarette pole. Because you're dealing with me, Eddie. You are, though, aren't you? No. You don't like this version of me? Clean living. I kind of don't. Clean living, confident, happy.

It's not confident. I'm happy. It's more of an arsehole. I'm happy. It's a kind of... It's an assholishness. Oh, look. House of candles.

Oh, look. House of candles. All right, OK. I just thought you'd add some more to it than that. What am I going to do? What do they do with those candles? They put them up my arse. Is that what I do with them?

While someone washes my willy? Mouth wash my willy. Do you want a mouth rinse and spit? I love that. I want a candle up my arse. Is that what Elton John meant by candle in the wind? Mate, where is this place? We've been walking for fucking hours.

It's been 20 minutes. Let me check the map again. I'm pretty sure we're all right. Hang on. The whole time we've been walking along the side of this huge lot, haven't we? Look, we're a block away. Five minutes, I think. It's just that this whole black section is Sony.

As far as the eye can see. It's insane how big this block is, this lot. And these are all new developments coming up now to opposite it. So, yeah, there you go. Anyway, that's it. A little update on what's happening next. We'll report back as soon as possible. Right, so we're on the platform at, where are we?

Because you're leaning on it. Culver City. Culver City, waiting for the E line, the Eli line. The Eli line. The Eli line to, we're going to change at 7th Street and Metro Centre, where we will then decide if we're going to brave the red line for a bit or Uber. Honestly, I think the car's going to be just as long at this traffic this time of night. As someone who's lived here.

How are we going to get, because it's quite a long walk from... No, we'll get an Uber from there. If we end up getting it to the red line, blah, blah, blah, we'll just get an Uber from there. We'll get it from where Brian dropped us off. Yes. That is the closest stop. Is it? It felt like he had to go onto the motorway to get to it.

But that's the closest stop. I know, it looked like it, but trust me, that was the closest to him. Anyway, the point being is that we're now waiting for the train. We went to the Spirit Halloween store and it was lots of fun, but the Killer Clown stuff that was there was not there. What it mainly had was a lot of those terrible, cheap Halloween costumes in that thick cellophane.

Yeah. There was one for a Crayola, which was just a T-shirt that said Crayola on it, I wanted, and a silly hat. And what was else? You know what's quite scary is the Bert and Ernie one because it's like an elongated, stretched out Ernie. Or is it Bert? Which is the strict one?

Yeah, it's Bert. So it's Ernie who's the wide-faced one. Yes. Hey-ho, rubber ducky. The skinny-faced one, but it's even more skinny. He looks like Mr Poopy Butthole, for being honest. The other thing I found interesting was... The next full-line train to Santa Monica is now arriving. Please step back and allow customers to exit the train before boarding.

Oh, they will. You can talk. You'll have to listen to that. It's how these costumes skirt around sort of ethnic problematic areas. For example, they had several pimp costumes, but all of the models that they have in the front photo were white men so you know because it's like they're looking at there's a stereo racial stereotype obviously of the black pimp here comes the eaves from santa monica heading on towards the coast but i did

notice that the voodoo another very problematic thing is voodoo as an exotic costume, because it's an actual religion, as we know. A legitimate religion. But they used a black model for that, I saw. But there's all sorts. There's Chucky, there's Killer Clowns, there's Scream, there's Freddy, there was Haunted Mansion, there was Fall. I mean, there was everything.

Because as you've pointed out before, it's not just scary things for Halloween. It can be video game characters Step Brothers costumes from the Will Ferrell film Step Brothers That was the most ridiculous it was just a

it's like just wear a cardi and a wig same fucking difference yeah but anyway after that got an Uber here and now we're gonna

tube it train it home and you know what think about it there's a little bit of train travel in this episode bit of walking bit of adventuring bit of bit of walking, a bit of adventuring, a bit of winky.

It's a bit of everything, isn't it? I'm feeling pretty worn down, I have to say, Paul. And we have an early night ahead of us because tomorrow morning is our Disney episode. Well, for Patreons, it's going to be our Disney episode, but for us, it's just going to be a nice day out at Disney. So that's our treat to us. It's our little treat to us.

Yeah, you're flagging. I'm flagging. So none of that spicy, willy-wash dialogue from me for the rest of this journey, I promise. Thanks, Paul. We've got a little treat for a friend of mine, and we've got a little treat for the family we're staying with. So, wonderful, wonderful things.

Yeah, I can feel it in my voice. I'm flagging mentally. Hello, I'm Eli Silverman. Welcome to TubeShare. Gash, splash. That'll do, won't it? No, it will never do That's what they like, innit? When we say Gash Splash No one likes you

They just listen for me Fanny Fudge They might like that one Yeah, they might like Fanny Anyone likes Fanny Fudge I like a fudgy fanny All packed up Oh, God

All packed up tight with it And then you heat treat it And and you've got toffee. Toffee alvalva. Yeah, I want this one. Quim spit. No, that's... Quim spit. I got some quim spit.

I don't like that. You know what? I don't like you. Oh, I think... Is our train coming in? I can hear rumbling. No. Anyway, that's enough.

That's enough of this. We just want to have closure on the Spirit Halloween adventure. Everything's an adventure with me. Aren't I great? No. Yes. It's Private Call, the phone all my own. My own photo album, a lock and a key. This phone gets used by no one but me. Five is for Jenny, six is for Glenn.

Eight is for Barbara, and nine is a ten. Your calls are all private, now so is your phone. Get Private Call, the phone all your own. I get a nice feeling when I've cooked a good meal. Same with saving money. Vons helps me do both. This week, clip Vons' own coupons from your newspaper and get Best Foods Mayonnaise. 32-ounce jar for just $1.29.

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So tonight, my date is in for one good time. Well, I hope you score more points tonight, buddy boy. Right now, save on these men's dress shoes. On sale for just $14. Payless Shoe Source. You could pay more but why So Eli and I are standing at Terminal 4 LAX our

American adventure has come to an end and so we thought we'd do a little wrap-up before we throw ourselves into the airport so we do a little wrap up before we throw ourselves into the airport so since we last spoke to you we've done a disneyland adventure haven't we yes we have paul and if you want to know what we got up to in our disneyland adventure well two things you can see it as a patreon supporter because we did a video diary but also we talk about a very specific story that happens in a forthcoming episode. A two part episode where we cross over with a podcast called Late at Night with Brian Wecht. There's a particular

story that happens during that day so you can listen to that when it comes out in a few fucking weeks. I don't know what the timeline is as we record this right now but it's coming. Thoughts before we get into the airport, Mr. Silverman? We were just in an Uber. He had

to stop to take a piss and he got stopped by a state patrolman. If I'd known that, I would have shat my guts. And I had the cannabis cigarette that I've been saving and trying to smoke and I almost chucked it out the window when he stopped to take the piss

before I knew that the state patrolman was coming up. So that would have been a thing. Yeah, I would have loved it. Excuse me, sir, can you please get outside the vehicle? Don't be chucking stuff out the window. That's sus as all fuck. You would be bent over the bonnet of the Uber getting your fucking cavities furred by a fat-fingered police officer.

That's what you don't want. I know, but when I saw, when he said, he went, I'm going to have to pull over, know, but when I saw, when he said, he went, I'm going to have to pull over, Jen, sorry. And I was like, why? Why? And then I turned round.

On the freeway, by the way. He was pulling over on the freeway. And I saw the cop coming up and I thought, what on earth? I didn't see that. And I had a little moment where I thought, oh my God,

this could get really, if he gets arrested, do you know what I mean? Oh, we're fucked. We're not getting on this plane. Or we might have been all right. The policeman might have taken us unless he searched your bag.

But, yeah, because I didn't see it because I just presumed he was taking a piss. Cannabis is legal here. Let's just remind ourselves of that, okay? Fucking hell. But my point is, I didn't turn around because I presumed he was having a piss. He definitely was having a piss because, as he said when he got back in, he'd been driving for hours and needed to take a break. I didn't see the cop car. is perfectly understandable i mean what are you

gonna do he was a lovely driver his name was albert so thank you albert because he started listening to the podcast now so if he ever gets this far thank you albert you slightly scared us for a moment but uh yeah so this is it this is the end of our adventure really um yeah we we found the uh the the winky, we had that day out, we did that stuff, Disney all yesterday, and today was just kind of, well we recorded two episodes. So we worked all day, mate, we worked. Yeah, and then had to pack almost immediately, and then.

Yeah, it's a bit, I mean, I'm a bit sad, I don't want to go home, really. It's always a feeling you have when you leave the States. But, yeah, with me personally, it's one of these things where it's like, I you have when you leave the states but uh yeah with me personally it's one of these things where it's like i know you're going to take the piss but like every time i come out here it feels like home to me and i feel more confident and i feel happier and you know i haven't smoked look inside yourself and and sort of think why that is and i think a lot of the things here are things that you can find back home.

Not good fucking weather for a start, because I honestly think that has a massive effect on my mood. To wake up and have a bright, sunny day that I'm eager to get out into. You need to get one of those SAD lamps, mate. I could maybe try and find a way to live in Los Angeles. If anyone listens to this in Los Angeles and wants to give me a job, I'll do it, I'll suck a dick. I'll suck it all. You'd suck a dick anyway, Paul. Whatever works. In fact, you'd suck my dick. Nah, I've got off that idea. I've got off it. Yeah, I've

got off it. I kind of feel spoiled. So, every time I hear this now i keep thinking of airplane the white zone is for loading and unloading screw you margaret i love it so so yeah it's kind of sad for me because as i say i have a history with this place i really like it we've had a lovely time brian and his family's been really accommodating to us we can't thank them enough um You know, we've had a really good overall positive time. Absolutely. And they were, yeah. Thank you. Brian and Rachel were fantastic.

And they have a fantastic daughter, Audrey. I say, lots of fun. So there's that. Disney was great to go to. We spent a whole fucking day, 14 hours there. It's great. What else, what else, what else, what else, what else? I don't know.

Today we just recorded two episodes. We're going to do a crossover episode where Cheap Show is doing the content from late at night and late at night they're doing Cheap Show content. And actually I think they're two really good fucking episodes, right? Real fun. Yeah, they felt good. So that's coming in the future. And I guess that's it really.

I don't want to harp on too much longer because, you know, what's done is done, what's said is said, and we just need to get home. So we have a nine-hour flight. It's 7.30 now. I'm hoping we can get some kind of... Fight to eat. Yeah.

LAX isn't like Heathrow. It's not really as stacked food-wise. There will be some fast food so I guess that's it we're going to say goodbye now really and thank you all because obviously without your support as a Patreon those who do support us on Patreon

this would not be possible so thank you all for giving us this gift I'm welling up, I can't do that right now that's weird you've been emotional all day I have been. I had a cry. Come on, man.

I don't know why I'm crying. I'm just sad to go home because I hate Britain. I know. I fucking hate the place. And so, yeah, thank you, patrons, for allowing me and Eli to have this adventure. And I hope with all the content that we've made, you've enjoyed it. What else? That's it. That's it.

That's it. So, look, if you want to see pictures from this adventure that accompany this episode, it's patreon.com forward slash cheapshow to support us on Patreon. The website where we're going to host pictures and some videos from this time is thecheapshow.co.uk

and it's your one-stop shop for everything you need cheapshow-wise, social media videos, the lot that's it okay, I love you guys I love you too, right take care you lot, thanks and a month of

Cheap Show episodes to come from LA and then it's back to the usual Cheap Show muckiness from the house of pickles, until, take care. Au revoir. And have a nice day. Stop saying and.

And have a nice day. That's what Americans say, isn't it? Have a nice day. You guys have a great day. All right. Take care, everyone. Homeward bound. I need a new TV, now! Hello Remco!

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