CheapShow - Ep 439: Boffalongo

Starting point is 00:00:00 Okay, Paul, I've got something to say at the start here. Yeah. I'm waiting for you to do something hilarious. You always do. Oh, it's a cold open speciality. You have brilliant. You do something brilliant. Okay. And I listen, listen, okay, we're all we're all supporting you to do something just a brilliant improvisation like the original ones. You always do. And I've got a joke that I made up today. I got a joke. I could do you a joke. I put it on Twitter. It was quite successful. Shall I do it here? Sure. As a joke? I'm waiting. So I do it just as is or shall I try and stand up? I don't know what you're talking about now. I mean I try to be supportive. Shall I do my gag as like a stand up?

Starting point is 00:00:38 Just do the gag man. You're meant to be a comedian. Alright, here we go. So anyway, like four, I decided to get round to watching that film that was doing all well recently. What was it called? Yeah, I watched that concave film. But when I watched it on the screen it was weird, it was all like- I can see where this is going. Don't interrupt the gag!

Starting point is 00:00:56 He's in the mood again! Woah! He's raging out! How am I meant to do a gag? Alright, start again! How am I meant to do a gag when I'm getting interrupted by a fucking oaf? Start again. No, I'm not doing it.

Starting point is 00:01:08 Was it- Read on fucking X or B-Sky, whatever I put- Was it convex? I'm not doing it. Was the punchline convex? No, it wasn't. Oh, I didn't know where it was going then. I'm sorry, Paul!

Starting point is 00:01:18 Go on, do it, you funny thing you got then, you old joke. No, wow! Do it! Do it then! I haven't got anything now! You said you had a little joke Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa, I didn't know you were gonna completely rage out just tired of this Come on fucking tired of come on Paul, please. I do want to hear your joke

Starting point is 00:01:35 I'm not doing it now cuz now the air has been taken out of it Well, this is gonna be funny no matter what I do now is if you don't do it Paul if you don't do it now We're in trouble. I'm not is it? If you don't do it Paul, if you don't do it now, we're in trouble. I'm not doing it ever. I'm never gonna tell that joke on this podcast. I don't wanna do mine. You've put a bad feeling in the air. Oh, I wonder why that is. Is that because once again,

Starting point is 00:01:57 I was just in my flow. You could have just ignored me. No, I can't. So let's just say you're doing standup then and you're trying to set up a gag and then someone on the front row goes, oh yeah, I know, this is going. Isn't that gonna throw you off? Isn't that gonna actually gonna throw you off? Not if you're doing stand up then and you're trying to set up a gag and then someone on the front row goes Oh, yeah, I know which is going isn't that gonna throw you off is that not a professional? Yeah, but no, I don't I disagree I'm right quit and break all the stuff. We got fucking break more if you don't tell your fucking gag now I don't want to tell my fucking gag now This is like bad dad Paul. Oh, he's got a knife everyone

Starting point is 00:02:27 Cutter here. Wow. That looks nasty. He's gonna cut the box. Careful. Is this you? It's been really weird. That's your neck. All the gore coming out of your neck. Please do the joke Paul. Do your joke. Do your joke or this cardboard box. This wasn't the way this was meant to go this cold open. I know you Right birthday. You've put this podcast in jeopardy right before its 10th anniversary you Eli J So we just have a truth here podcast in jeopardy. Let's just do it next week We're gonna do then stop brandishing the fucking Stanley night today Gonna do then slash Stop brandishing the fucking Stanley knife at me! What are you gonna do then? What are you gonna do then?

Starting point is 00:03:07 Slash you, slash you, Ganon! Yes, you could maim me! I mean, why does that... Why is that in any way... You know, that would... Fucking shaking, and I'm holding a knife. Please! A real knife, ladies and gentlemen, this is a real Stanley knife that I'm holding.

Starting point is 00:03:22 I promise not to interrupt you if you do the jack go... I'm not doing the Jack Goat. Just don't do so much fucking pointless setup. The whole point is the setup. You went to see Conclave blah blah blah blah blah. What's that film called? I'm not doing your joke. Your joke.

Starting point is 00:03:33 Go on, do your joke. Will you do yours if I do mine? No. You either do your joke or this podcast ends today right now. Right now. I'll put it out as whatever we've got here. Four minutes. I'll put it out and that'd be the last cheap show

Starting point is 00:03:45 do it now do it now do it now do it do your gag all this podcast is over you're in charge of the future of this podcast do it now do it I'm not doing it you do your joke I'm not doing my joke if you want this podcast to continue please you do your if you want this podcast to continue please do your joke no you do your joke I'm not doing my joke you're you do your job. You want this podcast to continue? No, you do your job doing my job. You're you doing your job until you've done your job. I'm not doing my job I'm never gonna do my job We are not getting out this cold open until you tell your joke And if you don't tell your joke, we're never getting into the episode joking about having a joke There was is no joke. So there's a lie now lie upon lie. You put me on the back leg

Starting point is 00:04:23 You put me on the back leg and this is how you treat me yourself on the back leg Well, it's back five ray isn't it how back foot you should have seen it everyone. Yeah, he was Do you want to see it again? You better tell me any joke right now? I don't have any any Joe right now What does a snowman say when he goes to the moon go on Oh, he says oh, oh those craters look like melted snowballs, right? It's fucking podcasts over. Take care Those craters look like melted snowballs. Right, this fucking podcast's over. Take care, everyone. Bye bye.

Starting point is 00:05:05 I did a joke. I did a joke. Bye bye forever. That was a joke. That was fucking hilarious. I've got new projects on the go anyway, so I'm just going to dovetail into those now. Oh yeah?

Starting point is 00:05:14 Yeah, do. What new projects? What? What? Which? What? League of Extraordinary Board Games with Stuart and Olly. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:05:22 We started an episode last week. I saw that. Yeah. Why didn't you tell me about that? Because I have to have my own needs and desires. I have to have my own goals. Oli! Yeah! We started an episode last week! I saw that! Yeah! Why didn't you tell me about that? Because I have to have my own needs and desires. I have to have my own goals. I have to have my own ambition.

Starting point is 00:05:31 And I'm gonna! Because I can't stand here! Is that a YouTube thing? What? What is it? To a fortnightly YouTube channel where me, Oli and Stuart play board games. And they like it, unlike you, who's always like, this is shit! This is horrible! Well guess what? I've got new friends now

Starting point is 00:05:46 You don't mean it. Can you do your joke, please? And then I'll do my real joke. I went to the... I decided to go watch that film with Ray Fiennes called Conclave When I was watching I thought there's something wrong with the image because it was all Pushed into the middle and then stretched out to the side. It turns out I was watching concave instead. Was that the gag? This podcast is over. Welcome to Cheap Show. I do have a gag.

Starting point is 00:06:32 Now that you've told me yours, you've... It's not... It worked better written down. And you asked for a joke. It's okay. And I've given you. And I thought it was his lovely whimsical dry wit. Thank you.

Starting point is 00:06:41 Concave. Thank you. Sounds like conclave. You know. Yes. Thank you. I mean, I could have done done convex but it wouldn't have really fitted the wordplay I was doing. It could have been a totally different joke but it would have been along the same lines. And I'm sorry to interrupt you that first time, I didn't interrupt you the second time. Now you're ready for what I think is going to win the joke contest today. Oh and this is not a contest.

Starting point is 00:06:57 Alright, it's going to be good as well. Is it? Yes, you are going to love this. You are going to love it. Is it going to be as good as your Moon Man joke? What the Snowman joke? That was pretty good. Off the hoof.

Starting point is 00:07:08 That was pretty good. No, no, no. There's no back leg, back leg. Come on. It's memorable. No, it's only in the fact that you had a complete mental wobble breakdown right after you said it. Actually during the whole process.

Starting point is 00:07:17 Are you ready for my joke? Yeah, go on. It's so funny. I can hardly say it. Oh, what am I doing? Where do you put up pairs of pants that have died? I don't know Eli Silverman, where do you put a pair of pants when they've died?

Starting point is 00:07:34 Grunda ground. No, nothing. There's nothing. Maybe the podcast really is over. I'm beginning to think we're not going to reach our 10th birthday. And I think this is all down to you. It's not why you behave. Ground to ground. No, I'm sorry.

Starting point is 00:07:59 That has not worked for me on any level. No joke. I could have told would work for you there. First of all, I didn't know what you meant by pants, because in America, for instance, pants are trousers. In America, for instance, they fucking call Stanley Life's box cutters. Are you? I'm reaching out to an American audience.

Starting point is 00:08:15 You're reaching out to an American audience. I've just noticed. And also, I've been more considerate to an international audience, and sometimes you forget that simple punnery doesn't quite translate in some respects. But what do they call pants in America? Undies or knickers or boxers or underpants or wife fronts. I like it. Where do you bury underpants?

Starting point is 00:08:34 Grunderground. Right. I had a much better version of the joke when I woke up this morning from a dream but didn't lie it down. Yeah just like Paul McCarty when he wakes up from his dream he writes yesterday and then you come up with that. Great stuff. Oh no, what we got coming up on the show anyway? What is it when you cremate someone?

Starting point is 00:08:53 It's cremation isn't it? It's cremation. Can we do another gag about it? Ah, easy! It sparked your imagination, hasn't it? I'm basically trying to fix a broken down building. It's your joke to fix a roper, is what I'm saying. Yes, I knew that.

Starting point is 00:09:04 So where do you bury underpants? Oh, the skid-stain cemetery. The cremin-gussitorium. Hey, hey, hey, cremin-gussitorium. Hey, hey, cremin-gussitorium. Oh, I've got a cremstein. Oh, is it from an eclair? No, I was thinking something else. I think it's a bit like a building full of different types of

Starting point is 00:09:31 cream called the crematorium. Well, no, do you know there's an apparently reviving Britain's high streets? What is cream? Yeah, cream is the heist variety. Ice cream is is is what? Reviving Britain's high streets. In what respect? Because there's a lot of crematoriums. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Come to the crematorium. The ice crematorium.

Starting point is 00:09:53 That could be a holly, like a Disneyland theme. Halloween themed. Halloween themed. Halloween. Halloween. Is that why they call it Halloween? Because it's like your soul gets ripped out. No, they call it Halloween. Halloween. Is that why they call it Halloween? Because it's like their soul gets ripped out. No, they call it Halloween. So, you know, they don't do that. Right. Anyway,

Starting point is 00:10:12 come on. Well, it's been four minutes. Welcome to Cheap Show, the economy comedy podcast where Eli Silverman, who's him and Paul Gannon, who's me, go through bargain bins, charity shops and pound lands at all of the UK and we bring you back the treasure we find amongst the trash, if there indeed is any. And today's episode is a PO Box Delivered Price of Shite episode. The Price of Shite is a price guessing game that goes way back on this 10 year old show.

Starting point is 00:10:39 Right back to the early days. Price of Shite is a guessing game. People buy or we buy items from a charity shop. For a bit of a laugh, we try and guess what we paid for those items. That's what we're going to get into a little bit later.

Starting point is 00:10:51 However, we've got something before that. A little bit of admin. Just the link in the description for this episode will give you a link to our live show on the 18th of October. Our guests for the live show will

Starting point is 00:10:59 be Nick Helm and Rhea Leena. Also links to the pre-orders for the album. That's going ahead. It's looking good. We've had loads and the pre-orders for the album. That's going ahead. It's looking good. We've had loads and loads and loads of people buying it. So that's fantastic. If you want yours,

Starting point is 00:11:10 go to the link in the description and pre-order now. The sooner you order, the sooner you'll get it. It's going great guns. We've done a bit of admin today. Next week's episode is a 10th birthday laid back episode. Me and you, we're just gonna chill, have a few drinks and reminisce on our favourite episodes. If you're listening and you have a favourite moment

Starting point is 00:11:28 or you have a favourite episode, email thecheapshowatgmail.com and tell us your cheap show story, how it feels to love us. And we're doing a live stream on the 13th of June, Friday night, 8pm UK time, two hours with guests, just a fucking muck about for a laugh to celebrate 10 years.

Starting point is 00:11:47 It might get messy, it could be a massive anti-climax, but you won't know unless you join us. We're streaming on YouTube. In on YouTube Live, yeah. Right, we are now going to do a Tales from the Dancefloor, but before we get there, I'd like Eli to share his, because you said you had one. Little one, Paul, DJing the other night.

Starting point is 00:12:03 Yes, now okay, Tales from the Dancefloor is the bit of the show where Eli explains to us some of the asinine stories that he's experienced being a DJ in some fucking dingy club somewhere in London where he's on the paid and on the valued. Go on. Well, thank you for that. I agree. And it was getting towards perhaps my final set of the night. Anyway, this young lad comes on the stage and he leans over the booth and... In your bubble, gets in your bubble. Gets right in my bubble and I don't like it because I've got the vinyl players there and they kind of, you know, with their drinks... So already I'm on edge always just because you think, oh...

Starting point is 00:12:35 Stay away, don't fuck this. It's going to fuck it up. But he was perfectly charming and he said, oh, this is great. It's great that you're playing vinyls. I've got a request. Uh-oh, here we go. At least he says, I've got a request, not, can I give you a request? No, he didn't do that. He just said, I've got a request. And his request was? Kissing his ugly girlfriend.

Starting point is 00:12:54 His girlfriend was not in, I don't, his name was Carter. Oh, bolly. He was from America. Did you get him? I didn't get him. And he wasn't an unstoppable sex machine either. No, I was.

Starting point is 00:13:04 Was he a big light, light but is out of shape? Was he one of those guys? Anyway, go on. He leans over and he goes, his request is... I didn't hear Songtile and the artist and I didn't hear It to the artist because I laughed into his face. And the words that came out of his mouth were dancing in the moonlight. Oh dear.

Starting point is 00:13:22 Do you know what I mean? And I just laughed because it's like, he thinks he's being so cool and it's like, this is... That 90s middle of the road hit by... Huge radio hit. Dancing in the moonlight, everybody's feeling... It was a colour version of a sort of disco, it was an original disco one. Perhaps he was asking for the original, you know. Yeah, who sung that in the 90s?

Starting point is 00:13:42 Top Loader. Was it Top Loader? That's the one hit wonder they had, wasn't it? I don't know. Yeah, Top Loader. It was ubiquitous in Britain anyway. And I said to him, that's just such a sort of mainstream request. And he said, well, they don't play in America on the radio. Jubal? Yeah, Jubal. That's the original from the late 70s. Is that right? 79 or something? Oh, hang on. Sherman Kelly wrote Dancing in the Moonlight after a brutal gang attack. While recovering, he envisioned an alternate reality,

Starting point is 00:14:09 the dream of a peaceful and joyful celebration of life. What a load of shit. This seems like a whole story. Stranded without money after Kelly left his wallet on a boat, an innkeeper offered them a room if Kelly's girlfriend slept with him. They refused at a second inn and they slept on the beach where they were attacked. This is for reading something else out. girlfriend slept with him. They refused at a second in and they slept on the beach where they were attacked. The song was originally written by Sherman Kelly recorded in 1970 by Kelly's band Bofolongo. That's what it says here Bofolongo B-O-F-F-A-L-O-N-G-O.

Starting point is 00:14:38 And then was a hit single by King Harvest in 1972. I tell you what, King Harvest, that's the one, that's the most famous one before the Top Loader one. I do like the name though, Bofolongo. I took some of those Viagra. Oh yeah. Bofolongo. I had a Bofolongo for months.

Starting point is 00:14:58 I could smash toffee with it. Where do pants go when they want their freedom? Bofolongo. The underground railroad. No wait, that's not good. That's not good at all. Sorry, I'm sorry. I am genuinely sorry.

Starting point is 00:15:16 This, if anything, is the problematic material of Cheap Show this week. And he also got excited and went, DAMN! And every time he said damn he smacked his hand down on top of the booth and the record and it's just like come on man. Oh he did that? Because I said oh look be careful because the record player. Yeah. He went no that's fine I know about that. You don't though obviously. And then he's smacking the top like oh anyway. Good story. Thank you. Now let's have a Tales

Starting point is 00:15:39 from the Dance Floor sent in by a great listener to the show. Yes well I got this as a message on Instagram from someone called Beanie and Beanie on Instagram happens to do a kind of, I don't know what you want to call it, happy hardcore house that kind of music, innit? It's hard to tell what genre that is specifically because you said two separate genres and then you made a funny noise. Happy, happy hardcore. Happy hardcore is a genre.

Starting point is 00:16:04 Yeah, and then what was the other one I said? House, completely different and much wider genre. But to the layman, it's all the same fucking muck, isn't it? Not really. It's all the same fucking muck, that music. I think even the layman could probably... That doesn't sound like either of those genres. What's the one that I like that goes...

Starting point is 00:16:22 That's dubstep. I like dubstep a lot. EDM, that became EDM. That goes, whee! Wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub wub 30 minutes, say, when I am gonna cut to fuck. Right. It's hot in here. I know it's from Beanie. Let's wrap this up. Hi. Here's a relevant tale from the dance floor, Mr. Gannon. So, girl comes up to him, which is slightly unusual. Do we know where he's playing?

Starting point is 00:16:55 He doesn't say. He's a live DJ. And it's dance music. And he does wub wub wub stuff. Bibbidi bobbidi music. Bibbidi bobbidi music. Bofolongo tunes. Beanie Bofolongo.

Starting point is 00:17:04 I was gonna say, I didn't want to insult Beanie, butbidi music. Bofolongo tunes. Beanie Bofolongo. I was going to say, I didn't want to insult Beanie, but he should put a Bofolongo after the Beanie and then he'd be Beanie Bofolongo, which would be fucking great. It's a great name. Call yourself Biffy Bofolongo. Not Biffy Bofolongo.

Starting point is 00:17:16 Oh yeah, no. Call yourself Biffy Bofolongo. Beanie and Biffy Bofolongo. Because if you don't, next week on the show, we're introducing a character called Biffy Bofolongo. Because if you don't, next week on the show we're introducing a character called Buffy Bofalongo. So, a girl comes up to me, which is slightly unusual. Da da da da da. Yeah, thank you.

Starting point is 00:17:32 I can do it. No, no, good. Which is slightly unusual in my type of DJing, but I know this girl is a regular so it's all good. Right. And then she goes, do you have double zoot? To which I say yes. Then she replied, and then the teen yeti one, to which I say yes then she replied and then the teen yeti one to

Starting point is 00:17:46 which I of course said yes and fuck yes did we play both afterwards we were talking for a bit and she said she started listening to cheap show a while ago and liked it a lot so if you ever doubt yourself remember that your fans are so good they run your marketing for free now I remember little story that I remember beanie did actually share the Teen Yeti one with me. Do you remember it? Yeah. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:18:08 He's done two or three I think. He's using a fragment of a Teen Yeti lyric which is in fact one of the raps that's on the forthcoming LP. Which is where he goes from the fucking Alps or something. That's that lyric isn't it? But I would say that genre of that track that Beanie sent me was much more Gabba. Gabba. Gabba I don't know. Gabba techno, which is that really fast stuff.

Starting point is 00:18:27 As long as he knows, that's all that matters. So the Double Zoop was that album where all the language is made up and that's where the Kiora song comes from. Ah. Fedora, right? Fedora is the group, yeah. I think Double Zoop was another track off that album that he might have sampled for some reason.

Starting point is 00:18:42 Right. That's what I'm thinking. Anyway, Beanie, thank you very much. Thanks, very much. It's a lovely little story. Right. Now, let's exhaustively fucking roll into the actual meat of the content of this podcast, which is today's PO Box Delivered Price of Shite. Price-o to Shiso. Don't get it, Rongo. It's a Bofolongo segment. Bofolingo Longo?

Starting point is 00:18:59 Bofolongo segment. Bofolingo Girl. Bofolongo Longo. Come round the outside. Bofolongo long- Come round the outside. Bofolingo girls come round the outside. Come here darling, you fancy a bit of a Bofolongo in the Congo? You won't go wrong-go if you suck my dongo. Eli has his pen and paper ready. I'll be taking the guesses, the price guesses now.

Starting point is 00:19:23 For it is time for... The fucking price of shite. Oh, it's the fucking price of shite. Oh, it's the fucking price of shite. Oh, it's the fucking price of shite. That's right! And that's right. It's time for the price of shite.

Starting point is 00:19:36 The game show where Eli and I guess the price of shite bought from a charity shop. And Eli now is going to explain the points system for how this rolls out item by item. One thing you have to remember about the price of Shite is the points in this game are referred to as petwings. That's very important you won't get far on this show if you don't recognise the power of petwings. It's the power of petwings and petwings is the things that we strive for when we play the price of Shite. You get awing, if your guess of the price is 25p, either way the actual price, Paul. Understand the lingo, don't be a boffa-pertwingo.

Starting point is 00:20:13 What is it? Bofolongo? Bofolongo, boffa-twingo, boffa-pertwingo. As soon as you read out that food group is called Bofolingo, we both knew we were going to try and make hay with Bofolingo Look hours by now people have recognized that this is also the title of this week's episode So of course, I've already bought into it Grunder ground Bofolingo. Yeah Got a terrible case of underground Bofolingo Grunder ground Grunder grounds Bofolingo Now one between you get if you're 25p either way the get of the price

Starting point is 00:20:44 So let's just say I say one1.25 and the actual price is £1. I'd get a per twing. And also would get a per twing if you said £75. Exactly. See where we're going with this? Why it's easy. If you want two per twings in this game, Paul. I would like two per twings, Ely. How do I get them? You score two per twings by getting the price exactly right. On the nose, as we like to say, if it's on the nose, you score two betwinks. If it's on the nose, you keep your clothes. You keep your clothes

Starting point is 00:21:11 on, including your grandies. Yes, indeed. Now, we all want two betwinks, but they're hard to get. Now, those are the basic rules. There are other supplementary rules and sometimes the kind listeners who send in the boxes have stipulations. Now do you want me to talk about the quidscan bit now? Well I reckon we can say that because it doesn't look like this week it has a quidscan bit. No quidscan bit this week. Shall I just reveal what the letter says and then we can make adjustments to what we've already stated.

Starting point is 00:21:37 Please. Dear Eli and Paul. Thank you. Big congratulations on your award. I reckon it's about time you got some recognition. I have been a fan for years so I thought I'd put together a price of shite for you. Big congratulations on your award. I reckon it's about time you got some recognition. I have been a fan for years so I thought I'd put together a price of shite for you. I have enclosed five items. Five items purchased from Cancer Research UK in Portsmouth.

Starting point is 00:21:55 All from one shop? Yeah. For a total of £11.25. We've got a ceiling. We know it ain't gonna go any higher than that when we guess our points today. In fact, that is the exact price that it all came to. 11 pounds. 25p. 25p. Okay, I'm writing that down. The usual Pertwing rules apply except for one item which was quite surprisingly cheap or expensive. I forget. Anyway, this item is worth double betwings, so best of luck

Starting point is 00:22:25 identifying it. The prices are in the envelope and indeed the envelope... I know what you're about to say. What the fuck was that all about? So do we have to guess an item that is either too cheap or too expensive? Yeah. Well... Isn't that like the most nebulous thing? Here's what I suggest. Underexplained there. What's their name? We haven't gotten there yet.

Starting point is 00:22:46 I know. Is there more? I'm not going to... I'm holding back in case you rip into them and I'm going to protect their identity. I'm not going to rip into them. I just wanted to address them by their name. Maybe I don't want you to know James's name. Well the letter is addressed to me, Paul. Don't you think I have a right just as much as you to see what their name is? Absolutely not. You're being really weird. I am.

Starting point is 00:23:02 God I'm sweaty. God I'm sweaty. Yeah. Good thing I've got nice wicking grandals. Eli goes Pongo with his boffa Pongo. Fuck off. Boffa Pongo. His boffo Pongs quite a lot. So what do we do then? It's either surprisingly cheap or surprisingly expensive, I forget. So I don't know how you how we formulate that in our ad it probably say on the price list, right? Yeah, but if it's too cheap and we think it's gonna be too expensive Then it's gonna throw our numbers off. Perhaps we just get the extra petwings whoever's closest on that particular item Also, it makes us double it makes us kind of not trust our prices

Starting point is 00:23:38 We don't know if something's meant to be expensive when it's cheap Did they say which item that would be no whether they Whether they'd... it will become clear once we... Well, we hope so. Can I have their name, please, now? I'm not going to give you James's name in this letter. I've already said this to you. Bit unclear there, James, on the last thing. Why do you think it's called James?

Starting point is 00:23:54 His name's not James. That's just the name I've given him so you don't attack him. Fine. Really is James, though. Anyway, I hope this makes for a decent price of shite and I can't wait to see you both at the Cheerful Earful Live show in October. Keep up the good work and yes James, we will see you there and then. Thanks James.

Starting point is 00:24:10 So there are five items. I've got a graph, a grid, a sheet, a form. You know what I'm going to do? I'm going to amend the game plan. So we don't know if it's going to be too cheap or too expensive. I reckon after all five items, we just look at the one item we think is too cheap or too expensive. Regardless of what the price is, what they're thinking about when it comes to that.

Starting point is 00:24:28 Basically we just have to guess. It's an extra guess. A guessing game. Right, so there are five items and we can get going right now. So shall we start? I'm up for it. Let us begin. The price of shite. Right, I know what these are because they're written down here. I will just pull them out and what I think is of interest. Come along. Don't be timid, Mises. It's time for the prices to shises.

Starting point is 00:24:51 I want to get this one out the way because I saw this and I thought, oh, we can't get any comedy out of this. This is a cycling quiz book by Collins. Over 2000 questions to test your cycling knowledge. Oh boy, exciting stuff. You want a cycling question, Paul? Did you ever pass your cycle proficiency test in school? I did not. I did. That's what my flatmate does. Oh yeah, of course he does, yeah. And I've got a little badge up there. National Cycle Proficiency badge, the little triangle one with a badge.

Starting point is 00:25:17 Oh, I love that. He might actually like this. Mate, he can genuinely have it if you think it's going to benefit him and his life in any way. Do you want a question from in here? Of course I do. I want to see if the layman can get some of these. Okay. I'm more surprised that they could find 2,000 questions based on cycling. I've opened at a random page in this book. Random page?

Starting point is 00:25:38 This is quiz 56, potluck. Oh, I like potluck. So there are 20 questions. Which one do you want? I'll give it an extra potluck. Start at the top. Just start at the top. You want number one? Yeah.

Starting point is 00:25:48 Okay, you're gonna love this. This one's too easy. Too easy? I'll tell you what, do me the first and last because there's gonna be difficulties. Too easy, too easy. Go on. Who in 2013, everyone knows this, who in 2013 became the first Czech rider to win the one day Amstel Gold Race?

Starting point is 00:26:04 Fuck it, it. Whoa. Who the fuck cares? Right. I'm Bofalongo. Bofalongo. Do you want the last question then? Yeah. We're not even gonna bother looking that up are we?

Starting point is 00:26:17 Give us a fuck. If you know listening to this then congratulations. No one else is interested. This is multiple choice so you've got a good chance here. Give me an edge. Go on. No one else is interested. This is multiple choice. So you've got a good chance here. Oh good. Give me an edge. Go on. What was the nickname of early Tour de France winner Maurice Garin?

Starting point is 00:26:31 Was it? Multiple choice. A. The butcher. B. The chimney sweep. What the fuck? Or C. The undertaker. No! Crazy Undertaker!

Starting point is 00:26:42 The grumbletaker! No! And the grumbletaker. No! No! Crazy Undertaker! The Grumble Taker! No! And the Grumble Taker! No! No! Give me your grumble! I've gone crazy! He's going to set off my PTSD!

Starting point is 00:26:56 I'm going to play my organ! He's taking the knife out! Do you want to drop character and say this? I'm looking for an excuse to be the crazy Undertaker! Right, well I'm just going to slide and then I'm going to slide and then I'm going to slide and then I'm going to slide and then I'm going to slide and then I'm going to slide and then I'm going to slide and then I'm going to slide and then I'm going to slide and then I'm going to slide and then I'm going to slide and then I'm going to slide and then I'm going to slide and then I'm going to slide and then I'm going to slide and then I'm going to slide and then I'm going to slide and then I'm going to slide and then I'm going to slide and then I'm going to slide and then I'm going to slide and then I'm going to slide and then I'm going to slide and then I'm going to slide and then I'm going to slide and then I'm going to slide and then I'm going to slide and then I'm going to slide and then I'm going to slide and then I'm going to slide and then I'm going to slide and then I'm going to slide and then I'm going to slide and then I'm going to slide and then I'm going to slide and then I'm going to slide and then I'm going to slide and then I'm going to slide and then I'm going to slide and then I'm going to slide and then I'm going to slide and then I'm going to slide and then I'm going to slide and then I'm going to slide and then I'm going to slide and then I'm going to slide and want to drop character and say this? I'm looking for an excuse to be the crazy Undertaker! Right, well I'm just going to slide the revealing blade out. I'm going! Fuck you, Jesus party pooper! I'm sorry we've gone to this stage of the podcast where I have to threaten you with a fucking knife

Starting point is 00:27:18 to drop your characters, but that's where we are. You're the one who said the Grandaltaker! And I wasn't allowed to develop the Grandaltaker! You were! I was just being... Don't you think both our Undertaker characters could be in hand at the same space? I think we've got too many Grundle-taken characters in general. There's no other crazy Undertaker! There's no other Grundle-taker! Yeah, and there's George Mental, which is, you know, who you're ripping off with your character.

Starting point is 00:27:41 Anyway, what was the answer? I don't know. I've lost the page. It was the butcher. I don't know. Why would you call someone the chimney sweep? Why would you call a cyclist a chimney sweep? It's what I don't understand. Well, what do you think it is then? The butcher because he chops in front of people maybe. Okay, all right, let's just say someone came up to you and went, have you met Ganon over there? You know, the old chimney sweep. What would you fucking think? You'd think I was still going to deviate, wouldn't you? Maybe. You know, people have lots of different nicknames.

Starting point is 00:28:05 I have friends who call me Breadcrumbs. Yeah, but that's fine. Why is that fine? I think it's unfair. Yeah, but it's not like- There's only one time when I was making Breadcrumbs for a meal. That's why I got that nickname. What I'm trying to say is, it's completely arbitrary what sticks and stuff. So maybe he once got his head stuck in a fireplace and they said,

Starting point is 00:28:23 oh, the old chimney sweep. Anyway, I don't know, what's the answer? Let's just, we've got the answers coming on page 117. Will they be delivered into a microphone as well? 117, yeah. It's usually quite handy, that's all I'm saying. You know man. Sun-tides, Paul.

Starting point is 00:28:36 Happy birthday to us. Fucking threateningly, with a fucking Stanley knife. It's come to that. It's not a box cutter. It is to the American audience who I'm appealing to. How many of them listen to this shit? None of them can even understand what we're saying. They think we're two Australian men.

Starting point is 00:28:53 Lots of Americans listen to us. All right, you ready? Yeah. It's chimney sweep. It was chimney sweep. It was. Does it say why? No.

Starting point is 00:29:00 This book is just... I want to read you one out then. How about this? Let's even get one! I'll give you another potluck, alright? Give me a question number. Seven. Who was the only Spaniard to win a stage on the 2013 Giro d'Italia? Fuck off!

Starting point is 00:29:16 Who fucking cares? Anything, is there anything that isn't just about people who are cyclists, you know? Gregorio is Italian name for what? A break. Er, where are the answers? On a different page. What page? 78?

Starting point is 00:29:29 It says 78, yeah. I'm changing my answer. Gear changer. A domestique? I don't even know what a domestique is. Now I need to figure out what a domestique is. A domestique? What was the other question I asked you?

Starting point is 00:29:38 Who wouldn't have fucking whatever? Who was the only Spaniard to win number seven? Benet. You know what? I can't read any of this. I can't read any of this! I can't read any of this! Anyway, it's a terrible item. Let's not dwell on it, Paul. We need a guess. Now, do you want to guess first the price?

Starting point is 00:29:53 Yeah. I should mention to everyone, we do have a Guardian of the betwings. They're in a nice brown envelope, manila envelope. I can see it there. And Grumpy Fibbage is sitting perched atop. I will say this. One answer, and I don't know what the question is, but one answer is willy

Starting point is 00:30:06 plink pluck. Willy plink plock. Willy plink pluck. Plink pluck. Yeah. Anyway, I think this is 75 English pence. Okay, he's gonna have a guess, 0.75. No quids gambit, no quids gambit, but I'm gonna say a quid.

Starting point is 00:30:21 Although if any of these items end up being a quid, oh mate, what have we done? Well we can put the quid's gambit on. He didn't say he couldn't do the quid's gambit. That's true. Sometimes they highlight it and sometimes it's a game we have to play ourselves. There might not be any item that is a quid though. Yeah, that's true. So are we gonna have one extra per twin for...

Starting point is 00:30:37 I'm still gonna say 75p for that. What are you gonna say? A quid. Right, item number two. Ready for item number two, Paul. Oh yeah, and you mention Multifibber Jar mascot mascot made by Nicky, is currently guarding the prices. Well done. He is guarding the prices there.

Starting point is 00:30:48 Right, I think you'll like this one though. I like it. I got that one out the way because it has no interest to us either, really. I know, and we tried to get some laughs out of it, didn't we? Wow. I don't know, it wasn't happening. There you go. And he's handed to me, it's wrapped up.

Starting point is 00:31:00 It's a tiny little thing. A little package here. You could slip it in, I don't know, like a little match box if you wanted to. Very small. I'm guessing figurine. Well, you wouldn't be too far wrong. I'm guessing some kind of little figure of some sort. This was found in a box labelled Whimsy's.

Starting point is 00:31:17 Whimsy? Well, that's what we're all about here on Cheap Show. We love our Whimsy here. It's a big Whimsy festival. Oh, it's one of here. It's a big whimsy festival. Oh, it's one of these. It's a little, I like this. Who will tell them what it is? It's a little porcelain dog, but these have got a name

Starting point is 00:31:32 because they're, I can't remember what they're called. I mean, it is the most generic of ceramic items. Little ceramic dog. And it looks like it's actually- It must have had, you know what it looks like at the bottom? It used to have like little green felt or something on it. Well, it looks like it's actually resin pretending to be a ceramic. That's what the bottom it used to have like little green felt or something on it. Well it looks like it's actually resin pretending to be a ceramic. That's what

Starting point is 00:31:46 the bottom reveals. It's a varnished resin. Not bad, not bad at all. A lot of these are chipped by the time they get to you and this looks like it is in pristine condition. Dogs these days have to be chipped don't they so their owners know where they are and if they go missing they can find them. Yes that's a pile on the work chips Paul. What's the connection between a real dog and a porcelain dog? They have to be chipped. Nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom

Starting point is 00:32:13 nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom And I can just retire on a beach in Magaluf. I heard Bofolongo is good this time of year. Bofolongo I'd love to go to but the price is sky high this time of year. I saw that ad. Come along go to Bofolongo. That one. No it was... Don't be a drongo, come to Bofolongo.

Starting point is 00:32:36 No it was like to Loungeo, come to Bofolongo. Yeah fair enough. Anyway how much you think that little fucking dog is? It's on Loungeo, Bofolingo. How much you think that little fucking dog is? Sun Lounge, oh Buffalingo! How much do you think that fucking little dog is? I think these dogs can be priced up. These are very collectible. Certain ones are collectible. And you remember, I bought one from that charity shop in Pinner, the hospice in Pinner,

Starting point is 00:32:57 and it was six quid. And you were outraged. It was a little fox. Maybe this is part of the whole, it's too expensive or too expensive. Ah. Maybe. It's my turn to guess first. But here's the whole, it's too expensive or too expensive. Maybe. It's my turn to guess first. But here's the thing, we're going to not ignore the price on that. We're just going to try and guess the item on its own in situ. Well, I think he's giving me a clue here.

Starting point is 00:33:15 Maybe. You're right. These do get priced up. Or maybe I'm reading too much into it all. You always do this to me. You have some kind of theory and then I think that's right. And then I end up being wrong, but but I'm gonna stick my neck out here. And if you think about it, it's only five items but we have to get up to £11.25. I'm gonna save £5 for this. I'm gonna save £5 for this.

Starting point is 00:33:34 That is one of the most daring gambits. Dog £5. A very daring gambit. We can always go back at the end and change our prices. Is that right, Paul? No. That's the way we've always played it. Is it? Yeah. This is the first time I've played the game. I don't know Is that right, Paul? No. That's the way we've always played it. Is it? Yeah.

Starting point is 00:33:45 This is the first time I've played the game. I don't know what your rules are. Shut up. Well, you tell me. Yeah, we can. Right. I'm going to go ahead and say £1 on the nose. I feel like a sign saying Wimsy's will also have a sign saying

Starting point is 00:33:58 every item a pound. OK, you're right. Now you've got a different theory. Yeah, but I could give you a different theory right now and it would work like it's a box of Wimsy's. Therefore, they're going. Now you've got a different theory. Yeah, but I could give you a different theory right now and it would work like, it's a box of Wimsy's, therefore they're going to be 25p each. I'm still saying five, you're saying one. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:34:10 Okay, let's go for the third item. Next one. Are you saving the best till last? Well, I mean, objectively speaking, yeah. This looks very phallic and he's handed me a... Now, I'll be honest, when I first saw this, I did think it was like a honey pot for penises. This is a little plastic box containing what looks to be a Christmas themed fleshlight water bottle. It is very pink and fleshy looking, rubbery looking. Can I

Starting point is 00:34:33 tell you what it says it is on the letter? What does it say? Which I think is at odds with what it is. I'm opening it now everyone. It's a Mr. Cheers pink stress toy and they say this looks incredibly wanky now as I say it does look like one of those sex toys a honey pot or whatever they call it okay you stick your member in and give it a squeeze no this is I mean mate that did just extend like a sex toy come on like that it did it is but it's got a little zip around the neck so what you put in it it is like a water bottle holder it's like a purse it's more like it's got a little um maybe it's like a pencil case thing.

Starting point is 00:35:05 Is it for like in your car you you hang it up and it holds your water bottle in your in a car? Maybe. That's what it says. It says here stress toy right but it doesn't I don't think it is a stress toy. It's not a stress toy it's got some kind of utility. I would say it's a pencil case. It's telescopic because you can scrunch it up yeah and unscrunch it there. You see that? I like that sound. Oh. Although mate. Better on the way out isn't it? If you put a little latex opening there Yeah, and unscrunch it there. You see that? I like that sound Although on the way out isn't it if you put a little latex Opening there that is definitely a blowjob toy You could fill it with some kind of gel or Vaseline or whatever or you know fill it from full of chunky The girth is like you know

Starting point is 00:35:40 Hey, it's a me a cardinal sin. Are you doing? I'm Cardinal Sin. I'll tell you, I like a little bit of buffalongo. A bit of buffalongo go a bit a long way. What is your view on the new pope? Oh, I like the new pope. He's a razzmatazz guy from America. Cool. Hey everybody, it's me, Cardinal Sin. Off you go then. It's too hot in here, that's what it is.

Starting point is 00:36:02 I'm gonna hold the knife to myself and threaten myself to not do characters again. Please don't. I thought I was happy to see the cardinal there. El ala bi, bafalago! Now this depicts a person, it looks like a pig, wearing a reindeer hood. This is quite cool actually. I just wish it had a more defined purpose. What does it say on the back, did you say?

Starting point is 00:36:23 It's all in Chinese. I can scan it. Or Japanese, scan it. Let's have a little look. Looks like it's it's one of several characters you can get because there's other characters portrayed on the card there that came in the thing. Okay, officially speaking. This is a Silicon pencil case. Pencil case. It contains silicon and a metal zipper. That's all it says. It is a telescopic pencil case, Paul. And there's a website called Quncle. Q-U-N-C-L-E.

Starting point is 00:36:49 Uncle, yeah, that's what it says on the Q uncle. Yeah, that's what it's... Quncle. It says that on the zip. When you get like a cyst on your fanny. Oh, I've got a terrible Quncle. Ah. Cut that out.

Starting point is 00:36:58 Cut out the cyst. Nah, that's the podcast. With your box cutter. Hey, it's a me, cut it off. I'm also surging of fannies. I cut it off for you, darling. Now you've gone too far, Cardinal. I cut it off for you, darling. I rub a bit of ice on it. I can't do the voice no more. Good, I'm glad. We're all glad.

Starting point is 00:37:20 Hey, it's a me. Oh, that's it. It's like a Mario, isn't it? Oh, I know. I know. I've got it. I've got it. You've reminded me. What? Where do you, where do, um, underpants, um... ... Where do they go, um, when they're... Where do they go, Paul, underpants? Where do they go? Where... He's zoned out, everyone.

Starting point is 00:37:39 Where do they go when, um, they're looking for, um, when they're on a romantic journey? I'm gonna fucking blow my brains out in a minute. When they're on a romantic journey into a rock and roll future. Don't know. Grunder Road. God, that was so fucking labor. I've got one. Grunder Road, but what is Thunder Road?

Starting point is 00:37:57 What is Thunder Road? It's Mad Max, isn't it? It's a reference to Mad Max. No, that's Thunder Dome. Yeah, but it's Thunder Road. Oh, there's a board game called Thunder Road, by the way, which is is that so where do underplants go where they want to play a board game you fucking tell me go under road or uh nothing anyway i've got one for you nothing i got a joke for eli eli where do you bury your spunk in a cementary cemeteryry. Semmen terry, semen terry, buffalo go.

Starting point is 00:38:26 OK, it's too hard. Seven. It's because we have to know. Please drive a little break after this. Yeah, a little break. No, we can't have a little break. Why, of course, we can. The only segment we've got. Yeah, but it's already running long

Starting point is 00:38:38 and I'm getting fucking tired of it. So I'm sure the listener is between between items between items. Yes, that's how we sports score the points No between I just saying between I get it. It's points weird. You're weird. I'm sweating. Yeah uh What are we doing? Forgotten. Oh price price. I'm gonna go to guess the price first on the uh pencil case

Starting point is 00:39:01 How much did I say? The first two items were sorry, can you just remind me? I'll just give you a little recap here, Paul. If you would, yeah. Just skim through your little book of papers and notes. My little book of papers and notes. I don't even know what the atoms are, just tell me the prices. You said 75p for the first item and one pound for the second item. I'm going to go ahead and say for this one it is maybe something like 250.

Starting point is 00:39:21 It is mint on card. You've got the card, the box, it's a nice thing actually. I mean it's a pencil case and it's a fine pencil case. It's weird this whole trend in toys where the toy depicts a child wearing an animal costume. You've seen there's teddy bear ones, what's that all about? Weird. It's a sort of post-modern thing where the doll depicts a doll inside another doll sort of thing. What this says to me is that the sex shop factory had moulds going and the next door

Starting point is 00:39:50 pencil case factory went can we borrow your fleshlight mould to make pens? Exactly that's what I'm saying. I think with a little bit of work I could turn that into a very very good sex toy and I will. Well you just need a bunch of mucks to fill in the girth hole. Just put some like chopped chicken in. Oh yeah. Stiff, stiff liver. No liver, stick it full of- Just go out the butchers, go where's your off tripe? Fill up my silicone pot with your liver.

Starting point is 00:40:16 And then like go home. Yes, we're doing well today Paul, we're doing well. And then I'll bury it in the cemetery. Do you know what it is, Paul? I've checked out. It's too hot in here and it's like Edinburgh after two weeks in a hot, sticky room. There's no laughs to be had. No.

Starting point is 00:40:33 I've been forcing it. Also, extend it to ten years and we're all on the same page, mate. We don't make each other laugh anymore. Oh, we do. 250, you said. Yeah, we do make each other laugh. I don't know, man. We do.

Starting point is 00:40:44 We had a good laugh last week, remember? Did we? Yeah. £2.50, said there? Yeah, we do make each other laugh. I don't know man. We do! We had a good laugh last week, remember? Did we? Yeah. £2.50 you're saying, yeah? For that, I liked that price. I like it Paul. I like the sound of it. I like it.

Starting point is 00:40:53 Sounds good, sounds natural. It's a bit of a shot in the dark, I will say that. Sounds lovely coming out your mouth. I'm going to say £1.75. Fair enough. He's hedging his bets there. Well, I've gone way out on the dog for fiver. Way out! Way out! He said a fiver already might-

Starting point is 00:41:13 Before that porcelain dog. But you might be right. We'll soon find out because we have two more items and Eli can amend his score later if he wants to, but for now- Thank you. But for now, we must roll on past the sex toy pencil case onto our next item. Hello everyone, we're back with the Priceo De Shiso. Priceo De Biso. We have guessed the first three items that James has sent us, thank you James,

Starting point is 00:41:41 and he has given us an actual price ceiling all five of these items come just to remind you Paul to £11.25 and you want to know what you've spent? That's exactly my question. Okay don't get too shirty, is the box cutter here? I can't find it. Oh good you've spent £1.75, £3.75, £4.25 so you have another £7. Interesting Mr Bond Okay and I've spent £7.75 so I've got less because I did put the dog, the resin dog

Starting point is 00:42:14 Quite high Quite high because I've seen them go for a lot and Well it's time to get the fourth item out so let's whip it out Whip out that item Paul, we ready to ready to see it oh I had oh I just had a thought go on what what TV TV network do underpants like to watch? Grundy. yeah that was the thing I was fishing for. you were fishing for Grundy? I was fishing for Grundy. okay oh it's a board game yeah I've got to actually cut this with a knife. The box cutter's coming in.

Starting point is 00:42:46 It's handy. It's actually handy. I have to say, Paul, that is a nice looking box cutter. Is it, Stanley? Ah! Oh my god! No, I'm alright, I'm alright. I'm alright, it just pricked me.

Starting point is 00:42:58 Fucking hell. Careful, you're tired. I've got the shakes. Just use the box cutter well. I've done it, I've done it. It's alright. There's no blood. I just pricked it. You're just a prick? Uh huh. Don't try and respond to that. It's perfect. Don't fret me with the fuck. Who made that box cutter? Stanley. It is a Stanley knife. It's a nice one. It's a heavy bugger as well. Oh it's got a lovely weight. That's a primo one. Where did you get that? Probably Amazon or something.

Starting point is 00:43:30 It's a very good one. Yeah. Lovely weight to it. Yeah. A pleasing weight in the hand. I killed a few monkeys with it. Why? The animals always get it from you. They get the fucking books. The animals get... They get boned and then they get slaughtered. Is that what it is? That's's not right Paul that's not right mulchy fibbage is here mulchy fibbage is a deity of the woodlands and all those animals yeah well monkeys live in the jungle he doesn't like jungles mulchy mulchiness there's no mulchiness in the jungle so therefore there's no sodden leaves to mulch through he's got relatives in the Amazon

Starting point is 00:44:04 El Mulcio Fibbacio no that's not racist that is and also probably Italian by to Mouchfu. He's got relatives in the Ametan. He's anti-young jungle. El Mulcio Fibartio. No, that's not racist, that is. And also probably Italian by the sounds of that. There aren't Italian jungles, are there? Are there Italian jungles? Why can't you just go for something? I'm not doing anything you want today.

Starting point is 00:44:17 Item four is a board game. It's called Think Blot Game. Can you spot in a blot? Can you spot in a blot? Are we going to play this? This looks fun. It looks fun, man. I don't know what the rules are.

Starting point is 00:44:29 It's going to be more fun than cycling trivia, that's for sure. Oh, boy howdy it will be. Boy howdy, that's your thing now. I saw that you posted boy howdy when you were promoting last week's episode. Can I ask, from where did Paul Nick boy howdy? I don't know, boy howdy is the thing people say in American films, they're like, Oh boy howdy, we're gonna be dootin' shootin' tonight. Boy howdy, we're gonna be dootin' shootin' tonight.

Starting point is 00:44:52 I think it's something like that, they say. Bootin' shootin', I'm a bootin' shootin' cowboy, Darn with me, crazy my obsession from a western, But Dan's floor a babe, Imo-dee-oh, ro-dee-oh, Gonna be b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b- western but Dan floor babe, I'm only your rodeo gonna be bad boy with a big bamboo one two three four five once I caught a fish alive that don't impress me much oh it comes with a dice and an egg timer egg timer egg you with that egg timer dice egg you with there's a pad where you write shit down what do you

Starting point is 00:45:24 have to do I don't know. The rules I think are in the big thick book it comes in. It looks like a calendar or binder. It's nice. Instructions. Just read them and we can play it. Hello, allow me to introduce myself. I am Dr. Seymour Blotts.

Starting point is 00:45:37 I created Think Blot image by putting ink on... I don't want to hear him. I don't want to hear from him. How do you play it? The ink's formed in many smudges, blobs, lines and globs. Splodge. Bofalongo. Images can be...

Starting point is 00:45:48 Right, OK, good. Object. To see as many different items in the think block images as your imagination can suggest. Oh, fuck. Points are scored by identifying as many items as possible within each think block image and persuading other players to see them too. The winner is the first person to get to the end of the scoreboard and back. One, set up the bind, then flip the front

Starting point is 00:46:09 to the front back. Clip, pencils, blar. Let's play. Roll the dice. Think, I'm just going to go to a think blot and you tell me what you, there's all rules and shit. Is it not very good? There's all rules and shit. Right, let's just do a think blot and you tell me what you think it is. This is image one, Eli, and I want you to tell me what you see in this think block. What is it? The Rorschach test. Rorschach. Rorschach. What is it? Rorschach. Rorschach. I think it's Rorschach. Rorschages. Another related word is Peridolia. Isn't it, right? This is like Peridolia the game. And if it was between my butt and my arse

Starting point is 00:46:42 hole it would be? Perineumidolia. That's the one! I'm going to show you this. I'll tell you what, I'll take pictures of the images we use so you can go on our website or Instagram. Now, you can't say we're not creative around here. Some people would. I think some people would. Perineumidolia. Yeah, I'm going to take pictures of everything we use in this image, right? And oh, there's little... Okay, so judging by the back... Popularized in the years after World War I, boy howdy. Okay. American vernacular. Now, the raw shock test is when you look at something and then whatever you see in the

Starting point is 00:47:14 inkblot image represents something about how you see the world with psychics. Well, you're a therapist, I think they've been widely discredited by psychological science. You don't see it these days, do you? It's like sinking sand. It's basically just a way of... Quick sand. Of getting someone just to think of something, and then you try and look at the Freudian metaphor. Behind it.

Starting point is 00:47:35 So what if I see, oh, I see my mum, for example. Oh, I see my mum sucking off the postman. Yeah. And then they know about your trauma. I mean, that is just how it works. Yeah. So I'm going to show you this first. You know, I'm getting at. Let me just repeat myself one more time so I can get this out.

Starting point is 00:47:49 You're going to show me the first image? No, shut up. Let me fucking say it before you let me fucking get on with it. Right. I'm going to take pictures of what we see and I'll put them on our website and Instagram so you can see whatever it is that we see in these blots. Okay, give me a blot one block one is your first blot. Is it the oh, oh, I see. Just like a Spanish matador.

Starting point is 00:48:10 Yeah. Right. Do you see that? I see a bow tie. Okay, I'm in the middle. Yeah. And that's his mustache. And he's got like no, he looks like a matador. That's why I said.

Starting point is 00:48:20 And also look, it looks like dollar sign there on the right. Yeah. This is shit. Look, it looks like sickles. Looks like he's holding sickles. Oh, and those things at the top look like F's on their side or those musical... Oh, this sucks, man. So maybe... Oh, it looks like a jester head at the bottom. Yeah, maybe it's a matador.

Starting point is 00:48:36 Oh, it looks like... look. Pegging a jester. Hand me it and let me show you. Does this look like someone doing the splits with his head down and his arms up? Do you see what I'm getting at? It's funny you say that because on the back it has man doing splits and then man's face. Sickle, I said sickle. Dollar, I got the dollar.

Starting point is 00:48:54 Yeah, dollar sign. So there's that one. You pick me one at random. All right, cool. I like the way they've got the answers on the reverse side of the page. Yeah, it's not like answers. It's like I think there's a common... Some work and thought has gone into this, you know, it's not a terrible thing. No, if we played it properly it might actually be interesting. Okay, I'm just gonna randomly pick another blot.

Starting point is 00:49:14 Okay, what we got here Paul? Mate, that is definitely Mummy. It's Mummy. Where's the postman? No, there's no... There's the postman behind her. There's Mummy's eyes at the top. Yeah, I've got the eyes, I've got the face here, but this looks like ovaries here.

Starting point is 00:49:25 Yeah, mummy's. That is mummy. Mummy. It's ovaries. Oh look, that looks like someone in traps. No, that's not. Do you see what I mean? Like a gynaecological shot of a...

Starting point is 00:49:34 Of a split leg. You know, you're getting it aren't you? Yeah. We're porn damaged. Or it could be two... I can't not see that. Or it could be two cocks back to back as if they're about to have a... Yeah, but why would they be like that?

Starting point is 00:49:43 It could be that Mexican guy who's got two willies. No, it's like, they've got two cocks back to back as if they're about to have a... Yeah, but why would they be like that? It could be that Mexican guy who's got two willies. No, it's like, they've got two cocks back to back and they're going to go five steps, turn, then shoot. This looks like an anchor. Anchor. You agree? This looks like someone on a trapeze or something. Well, I was going to say it's like a man fencing, like with his sword.

Starting point is 00:49:57 Yeah, but the sword's bent in half. What does this look like up here? Potato flying, that looks like spunk flying through the air. Yeah. Shall we see how many we got? That looks like a flacc see how many we got that looks like a flaccid willy it does look like a flaccid willy two flaccid willies at the top staring at me mum's face he looks like a boxer yeah you got that as well yeah and ovaries in the middle we both agreed on the ovaries both agree with me mum but it's got the ovaries yeah my mummy what's this like it says feet upside down

Starting point is 00:50:20 for the ovaries no it's mummy's ovaries with bridle, looks more like a horse cock mate. Dog catching a ball. I can't see that. That looks more like a fucking crocodile puppet. What's that top one you said was sponksplash? Violin with bow. Bollocks. Right, here we go.

Starting point is 00:50:36 Hard to see how it works as a sort of competitive thing, because you can argue forever, can't you? I think it's like, do you see this? And it's like, you can always say, no, I don't see that there. Do you see what I mean? Apart from the official ones official ones all right let's do another one one more what's this one oh we've got keep seeing people just with their legs in the air yeah you know ladies oh looks like a crab at the bottom see crab with the pincer I'll give you crabs I'll give you crabs you'll give me worse than that let's not go with a grated nutsack. No, that didn't happen remember. That was the fictional. The cheesy grated nutsack leg. That's the fictional Eli. Yeast protein.

Starting point is 00:51:09 Yeast lice silverman. Yeast lice silverman. Yeast lice silverman. I don't know it. Oh I'm sick of this. He looks like some cunt playing a guitar or something. You know what it looks like to me? Like someone diving into like an aquarium. Oh yes. Or maybe it's a fish diving in. Oh, you know what? It looks like a ski jumper who's inverted sort of like Eddie the Eagle Edwards has come off the is falling down. So it looks like a turtle with an arrow in its back like a turtle head or something. Do you think we've got any of these ones? That could be a fiddler. So that's that's what I saw.

Starting point is 00:51:38 I saw someone playing a violin. Crab fiddler. They are like Rorschach in that they are symmetrical. Yeah, they're both all symmetrical. What have we got? Oh, upside down diver. I said that. That's what we said.

Starting point is 00:51:49 No, I said ski jump. That's what I meant. Look, legs. We got them. And Florida was the other leg. Oh, fucking Florida always comes into this. I thought there was Florida with that flaccid penis in the last one. Finger pointing.

Starting point is 00:52:00 There's no crab. That's an obvious crab. So shit. Anyway, how much do you think the psychological game is? Ooh, see I gave five quid for the dog. I know. Is it you to guess first though? No, I guessed the last one first.

Starting point is 00:52:15 You did, didn't you? Okay. Well, I'm glad we're in a better mood after the break, aren't we? Are we? Don't start questioning that. Right, yes, because you guessed two-fifty for the... I did 250. For the pencil case. Right, so the very, very...

Starting point is 00:52:28 Very... Sex toy-like pencil case. Sex toy-like pencil case. Spoffo Longo. Spoffo... Longost. Spoffo Lungosteen. Now, stop making me noise. Stop making me noise. No. Right, I've got a guess, don't I? Yes mate, eventually you should fucking get involved in the reality of what's going on. Three quid. Three. I'm gonna go with two fifty.

Starting point is 00:52:56 Two fifty again? What did you say? Three? I said three. I'm just gonna go ahead and say two fifty again for a laugh, for a hell of a laugh. Now I'm hoping this last item is quite cheap because I've spent most of my budget. Just to remind everyone £11.25 spent in total. We have the Cycle Trivia book, the Ceramic Dog, the Sex Toy Pencil Case and then that was Ink Plot Game. Sex Toy Paper Case. Paper Case. Hang on, let me get it right, hang on, let me get it right. Let me get it right. I'm gonna.

Starting point is 00:53:26 Sex toy pencil case. Well done. For your good times, for your bad times. Have one, have one. Flungy plop pops, flungy poo. Stop. Flungy pop pops out a fludgy wudgy woo. Now you're gonna drive me mad.

Starting point is 00:53:43 Good. Let's move on! Flungy pop pop! Oh please! Stop! Stop! I'm crying! I really hope this last item is cheap. I'm not a passenger! I gotta get off! Here we go! Last item! Oh it's this one! This is the one you've seen already! It's this! Oh! It is a toy!

Starting point is 00:54:02 That doesn't look cheap. So look, we had a little go this already, but effectively, you remember the game Bop It? Where it's like a little stick with gadgets and levers and pulleys and things on and it shouts out what you're doing. That was pretty cool, the Bop It. Yeah, this is a Bop It, but different. This is basically, it's meant to look like a cardboard box. Like a package. Like a package you'd been getting in the cardboard box. It's Manila kind of covered.

Starting point is 00:54:22 It kind of looks like the box it came in. That's right, and they're, but it has different colored stickers on every face of cardboard box. It's Manila kind of covered. It kind of looks like the box it came in. That's right and there but it has different coloured stickers on every face of the box. Yellow. So it's rectangular box. Purple, green, red, blue, orange, yellow, yeah. And then basically it has a little speaker on and then you just kind of play bop it with it. The idea is, I mean there are different versions and levels but effectively it says throw it in the air, catch it and make sure when you catch it, it's facing the color it says for you to have feet on. Is that the only thing you do, basically?

Starting point is 00:54:49 Yeah. It's also like that fucking Rubik's thing. Remember from ages ago, that Rubik's toy I had, where you pressed it, it was like blue, and you turn it to the blue side, then press the button. Well, all of these go back to that Simon game. Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Starting point is 00:55:00 Don't they? It's the same sort of idea. A little core principle. Yeah. Little electronic thing that you have to perform tasks with So let's see if we can hear and I have a go. Hang on. Yeah, you can have first go. Thanks What the games called this side up? Yeah, it's like the whole concept is like a fragile box Isn't it a fragile? Here are the levels

Starting point is 00:55:28 Parties and party we can play together part? I don't know, let's find out. I'm gone. Listen for the color, then toss the box and catch it with that side facing up. Alright that's what solo is. Solo extreme, listen for the color or symbol, then toss the box and catch it with that side facing up. They've also got symbols, like one says heavy, one one says caution See they have the symbols as well Party listen for the color when the box is tossed to you and catch it with that side facing up We're doing that one. What about party extreme? Party extreme listen for the color or symbol when the box is tossed to you and catch it with that side facing up Do you want to do party extreme or just try party first? Let's try party first. Can I have it? Oh, yeah, you can start if you want. I know I can throw to you and you've got try party first. Can I have a, oh. Yeah, you can start if you want. Okay.

Starting point is 00:56:05 No, I can throw to you and you've got to catch it. All right, well. All right, party. All right, here we go. We're just going to move the mics. You might not hear this very well. Let's see how it goes. Hang on.

Starting point is 00:56:13 All right. Ready? Yellow. Purple. Purple. This side up. What happened? You didn't, you flipped it after you called it.

Starting point is 00:56:21 But that's what you, hang on, we'll do it again. Solo. Ready? No. Hold the box to start. Purple. No. Score zero. Hang on.

Starting point is 00:56:30 Solo extreme party. Here we go. Listen for the color when the box is tossed to you and catch it. This side up. This side up. What's going on? Solo, ready?

Starting point is 00:56:44 No. Hold the box to start. This is the thing with games that have only one button to make it work. Right, start again. I am. No, I don't like this. It's not very good. Can I have a go at the solo though? Yeah, go ahead. Just let me have one go on solo. Hang on. He is. Shake it.

Starting point is 00:57:25 Shit. I thought he was already on yellow. It was on yellow. Shake it. Yellow! This side up! Shit! I thought you... it was already on yellow! It wasn't yellow! It was already on yellow! I did want to ask! I did want the thing asked me to do! Maybe it's got a gyro meter in it. Shall I try one more time?

Starting point is 00:57:34 Yeah. Which button do I press? That one. Solo! Ready? Whoops! Hold the box to start! You are!

Starting point is 00:57:42 Give it a turn it over. Blue! Oh, I did shit! I'll do a go. Here we go. Give it a turn it over like oh Did you I would do a go here we go Probably get easier It might not be working very well, we'll just carry on. Oh, it's gone off. It stopped. Yeah, I think it's broken, mate.

Starting point is 00:58:13 How much do you think that is? Well, it might need better batteries. I haven't changed them and it had batteries in it, so I don't know. I also think you'd be better at it if you memorise where all the colours are in relation to each other. Yeah, but also you've got to flip it, so I'm guessing you've got to give it one rotation to register. It does seem like something that you could learn a sort of skill, you know.

Starting point is 00:58:32 Maybe, but it's not, I wouldn't say it's even... Wasn't that fun? No, I would say the fucking frisbee thing we had a few weeks ago, the one with the word puzzle game, was more fun in the similar context. Yeah, there's all sorts of things like that, but it is interesting to see and well done, James, for picking it up. It is a nice little thing. I've seen this before and I like the look of it

Starting point is 00:58:49 more than anything else. Yeah, but it's like big and plastic. I mean, yeah, anyway. You need to guess first on your last item. Right, how much have I got left? You've spent... 680, 789, 10. You've got four4 something left.

Starting point is 00:59:05 I'll just say £4 then. £4 for the box. I may as well round it up to £11. I'm locking myself in. I'm going to lock in those prices. Really? Yeah. What are you thinking for this one

Starting point is 00:59:13 since you've obviously gone over now unless this is £50p? Which, according to the letter, it still could be. £8. Because remember who said in the letter, oh, this one was super cheap or actually really expensive.

Starting point is 00:59:23 I don't remember. Don't you James? Well, are we going to guess as well which item we think is the thing, is the item? Do you see what I mean? That he's referring to. I think it's the small dog. I think whatever his context he's talking about, I think it's the small dog. I think it's the dog. That's why I said five pounds for the dog. Yeah, I know.

Starting point is 00:59:38 Maybe it's four pounds for the dog. But I'm thinking for the dog for the other reason. It's super cheap. It's one pound, you said, for the dog. Yeah, I'm sticking with that. Is that cheap? Because it's a whimsy. That's not cheap. Waper. Six, seven, seventy five. Or it could be expensive. You think it should be cheaper and it's a quid. Ten seventy five. That would be, make this fifty p. I'm going to take a quid off the dog. Oh yeah. All right. Yeah. You said I could.

Starting point is 00:59:58 Quid off the dog. A quid off the dog and then I'm saying this is two, I'm going to say two pounds for this. Okay. Do you want to change any of those prices now? No, that's, I'm happy now. In that case, it is time for us to remove Mulchie from his place and check those prices. I don't know, we're doing it after the sound effect because we have to do this the right way. I don't know why you give a shit. It's because it's, it's all about pomp and circumstance, man. Listen, you've already insulted, you should let me handle Mulchie because you've insulted his relatives in South America. No, you did.chy, because you've insulted his relatives in South America.

Starting point is 01:00:25 No, you did! And he doesn't have any relatives in South America. He does! He does have... He has relatives in Mexico. Don't. Now, ladies and gentlemen, it is time for us to cautiously approach Mulchy Fibbage

Starting point is 01:00:44 and ask ask him nicely if we can have the scores. Can I have the scores please Mulchy? Of course you can. Thank you. There he is everyone. Do you have relatives abroad Mulchy? No. Didn't sound like your voice there. Anyway, shall I open... It's a harmless game of voice of noises. Oh, I'm in charge. You're in charge. Oh, that's right. Alright, you open.

Starting point is 01:01:17 Because you're in charge of... Okay, I've got the score. I've got the scores in case... In case you start changing your scores when you start knowing you're wrong. I won't be, but I often traditionally don't do as well as you at this game but I'm looking for at least one between and I'm happy basically I think you won the last one in the last fence didn't you? that was very close yes very good well that's nice there's an actual real card in the envelope on the front of the envelope is on the front of the

Starting point is 01:01:42 card King of Plasticine they've written in pens off for the day. And happy birthday your excellence. I mean, nice, nice attention to detail on this whole kit. Nice card all the same. Right, here we go. We'll do it by how we've written it down. Okay, so the one you wrote down first.

Starting point is 01:01:59 Yes. Cycle book. Cycle book. Cycle trivia. You said what? I said what? I said one pound. You said 75p. It was. 50p. A Pertwing for Paul.

Starting point is 01:02:11 Fuck. Do you get one? No, you don't, do you? Next item, Eli, what did we say? One Pertwing for Paul there. You said that we said the dog. Oh, dear, the dog. So I say it the price again that you said for the dog. I said four pounds in the end.

Starting point is 01:02:26 Yeah. And you said one pound. Right. And also we both said this was the item of suspect. Yes. Which is a bonus between. Yes. Because this is going to be interesting.

Starting point is 01:02:35 The small dog whimsy was the item. Yeah. That was overpriced. So we both get between there, yeah? But Eli, you're getting double points because it was four pounds. Wow. You got it spot on. Oh I'm feeling so good now. I mean you took a gamble there mate and it paid off big

Starting point is 01:02:51 time so that's four put-twings for you and the fifth. I've moved into the lead. You've come up well. And I get a fifth for what? Because we both spotted it. We both spotted it so you're on two and then I get four. Yeah so you got five altogether., I don't get four for getting it on the nose. Yeah, but it says double. So double betwings would be... It says double on this piece of paper. Yeah, it says four pounds double points. So I'm guessing if it's two betwings for getting it spot on.

Starting point is 01:03:14 I get four betwings. It would be four betwings. That's only fair. Yeah, so that means you've got five and I've got two, yeah? Yes. Oh no, I've got three. No, I've got two, I've got two.

Starting point is 01:03:24 Get excited. You got one for the first item And then one for spotting this as the item. Okay. Okay. Right. Next one. So the scores going into the third item. Who would have believed it? You're on two and I'm on five. Okay. How much now? What is the next one we did? The next one we did was the pencil case. The rather sexy... The sex toy pencil case? Sex toy pencil case. Sex toy pencil case! Yes indeed. You said £2.50. Yeah. And I said £1.75. £2.50. It was £2.50 on the nose. Oh you bastard! So that's another two for me I believe. He's almost fucking closing the gap. What is it? What is four? Five versus four now. You're on 4, I'm on 5.

Starting point is 01:04:06 Nice work. And then you didn't get anything. No, because you were 50p out. Okay. I was 75p out. Next one is the Think Blot game. Think Blot. What did you say? What did I say? I said 3 quid on the nose. You said, go for 250. 250 again? Are you fucking? No, you're cheating. You're a big old cheat. I don't even want

Starting point is 01:04:25 to look at it. This is so like... I'm showing you the last answer. The hand in Casino Royale that is totally rigged. What is it? You say it out loud and I'm not cheating. Say it on the mic. 250. So two points for me again. Two-per-twins. No, but that one above it is 225. Yeah, but you shouldn't be looking at that one because that's the hidden one I was trying to hide for the last one. Oh. That's why I'm trying to hide it with my hand. Sorry, I'm sorry. So you fucked that one because that's the hidden one I was trying to hide for the last one. Oh. That's why I'm trying to hide it with my hand. Sorry, I'm sorry. So you fucked that as well, haven't you?

Starting point is 01:04:48 But I want to see the other thing being... Where's the fucking knife? I want to see the other score of 250, please. I want to see 250 twice on that list. No, just get on what's the last one. The last one is the... The game this side up. This side up game.

Starting point is 01:05:00 How much did you say? How much did I say? I said two, you said four. Right, then that means you get a Pertwing because it was 225. That was the one price you saw. So what is it? What's the final scores? Six each. Bang on. Yeah. Oh, well, I think that was a very successful round for us both. You got two twice in a row. Yeah. And then you got the big double points. Let's just double check because this is, this is unheard of everyone. This has gone Pertwing crazy. Come on, come on, quick. So you said for the cycle book, 75p. And it was 50p.

Starting point is 01:05:28 That's one between. Yeah. You said one pound for the dog. But I was wrong. But I got a bonus point because I did spot it as the suspect item. So you get the one between for that. You also get a between for the same. I'm just counting your between.

Starting point is 01:05:38 OK. OK. And then the pencil case was 250. On the nose, you get two between. So that's one, two, three, four. Yeah. Thing blot, 250. On the nose, you get two Pertwing. So that's one, two, three, four. Yeah, thing blot, 250. On the nose. And then the last one was this side up.

Starting point is 01:05:52 Which you get none for. Which I get nothing for, but you get Pertwing. It's six all. So yeah, well, there you go. Ladies and gentlemen, it is six all. That is a Pertwing festival. I am covered in Pertwings. Wow.

Starting point is 01:06:03 I'm sapped with- It got exciting at the end. I thought I was gonna win it after I got the fucking four in petwings. Wow. I'm sapped with. It got exciting at the end. I thought I was going to win it after I got the fucking four petwings. It was kind of like a horse race. It was neck and neck. You must have thought I was going to win it then. I did. I got nervous. But then I saw the prices for the last few and I was like, fewie boy. You guessed £2.50. I thought boo boy howdy. No, but how weird is that Paul? The two of the items were the same price, £2.50 and you guessed both of them on the nose. I couldn't have cheated because it was completely sealed.

Starting point is 01:06:26 I don't understand. But then you got the £4 one. Maybe we were just in the zone, mate. We were in the zone today. Maybe we were just in the zone today. I did, because I thought… I did 10 years of doing this and we got finally get in the zone. It was a reason that I thought the dog was overpriced. That is definitely very…

Starting point is 01:06:40 Because I've seen them, they try and overprice this style of ceramic animal thing whimsy and can I just say because I paid six quid for that Fox no thing described as whimsy should be four pound just on principle you know what I mean and you see I bought it down for five quid yeah to add I know to add it to the other one and got a putwing on the other one as well mate it was mate it's weird what ten years in what a fantastic result. Six swings each, and I don't know about you, but I'm feeling pretty happy about that. From a fucking really mediocre episode, right into some of the best work we've done.

Starting point is 01:07:13 Oh, right, let's wrap this up. Hey, guess what? If you want tickets to our live show, 18th of October, go to our website. If you want to get a pre-order for the Cheap Show album to celebrate 450 episodes in 10 years. Where do they go? Go to the website.

Starting point is 01:07:30 Hey, if you want to see a page dedicated to each episode with photographs and sometimes videos to accompany that episode. Where do they go? Go to the website. Will they see pictures of all the stuff we've covered today there? Yeah, they will on our website. If you want to see where we are on social media, go to our website. What's the website? I'll tell you in a minute. If you want to see where we are on social media, go to our website. What's the website?

Starting point is 01:07:45 I'll tell you in a minute. If you want to see episodes of Cheap Shots away from YouTube, you can see them there as well on our website. I put them there as on the front page. All right. It's there. Latest episode, we're doing Pocketeers, tell me Pocketeers.

Starting point is 01:07:56 Where'd you go? Our website. And guess what as well, if you want our PO address to send us wicked cool stuff like James did today, where'd you go? Front page of our website. Website. What's the website? It is of our website. Website. What's the website?

Starting point is 01:08:06 It is thecheapshow.co.uk. And look, a lot of lovely people have helped us get to 10 years by supporting us on Patreon. Lovely support. If you would like to help celebrate 10 years of Cheap Show and give us a little bit of something to say thank you, go to patreon.com forward slash Cheap Show, but only give what you can, if you can.

Starting point is 01:08:23 Something like that. That's not a go. I can't believe that. Give what you can, if you can. Only if give what you can if you can. Something like that. That's not a go. That's something like that. I can't believe that. Give what you can if you can. Only if you can. Only if you can. If you can. And you'll get access to, depending on the tier, extra videos, bonus podcast, behind the scenes stuff, magazines, all sorts of sundry and love and joy will come your way. Thank you, Patreon supporters. And that's it. Do you have anything?

Starting point is 01:08:43 Oh, yeah. Next week is our 10th anniversary episode. So on Friday the 13th, you'll get the podcast in the afternoon. That will be just us kicking back, celebrating 10 years, talking about favourite episodes. Favourite episodes. And again, if you want to talk to us about your favourite moments or episodes, email us thecheapshowatgbell.com. And then in the evening of the same day, 8pm YouTube UK time, we're going to do a live stream.

Starting point is 01:09:04 Two hours or so with some of our friends all having a laugh. Come and join us and support us on Cheap Show and that's it in a nutshell. Thank you in a nutshell. As anything you want to add? I'm gonna name this ceramic dog Barnaby. Bofo Lingo. Oh Bofo Lingo!

Starting point is 01:09:17 Longo. I think Bofo Lingo has more of a ring to it. And in the nature of fair playmanship and going into 10 years with a song in our hearts, I would just like to confess that the pencil case was £2. Good-bye everyone! Oh my god! Good-bye everyone! I won! Good-bye everyone!

Starting point is 01:09:36 That's all for Jesus! That's why you were covering up, you fucking piece of shit! You couldn't even let me fucking win! I'm fucking not... What a finale! He couldn't even let me fucking win! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

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CheapShow - Ep 439: Boffalongo

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