Chewing the Fat with Jeff Fisher - 3/11/17 Jeff Fisher Show Hr. 3: TSA Screeners Have Issues

Episode Date: March 11, 2017

President Trump starts cleaning out the justice department and people aren't happy about losing their jobs, NFL players considering suing the league for abuse of prescription drugs and new TSA guidelines leaves Jeffy questioning agents.Follow Jeffy on Twitter: @JeffyMRALike Jeffy on Facebook: www.facebook.com/JeffFisherRadioFollow Jeffy on Instagram: @jeffymra Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is the Blaze Radio on demand. 2017 is going to be a volatile economic year. We may see politicians throughout the world attempting to control central bank policies. Several renowned financial analysts have warned that political interference in central bank policies may mean our economic misses of inflation and growth targets. Gold is an international currency that can't be issued or controlled by governments. If you don't have the only hard currency that has outlasted every politician and every failed idea, of governments for centuries. You need to speak to Gold Line right now and learn how easy it is to add gold to your portfolio or IRA. Now is the time to diversify your financial portfolio by adding gold.

Call 1-800-913-Gold. Buying real gold is easy and fast at Goldline. And you're going to be happy that you finally made the call. 1-800-913-4653. Goldline also offers price protection against short-term market fluctuations on qualifying purchases, so buy with confidence. Read Goldline's important risk information and find out of buying gold is right for you. Call Gold Line 1-800-913-4653. The experiment was a success. Begin Life Force reboot program. Now.

Stand clear. Life signs stable. It's alive. Set it loose. This is the Jeff Fisher Show on the Blaze Radio Network. Ask the question. I wait for it. Then I get you wrong.

Okay. All right. So the White House breach was last night. All right. I didn't. And first of all, CNN, I didn't enable your darn flash. Okay. Your CNN go.

Okay, you're not, I may do it in the future, but right now I'm mad at you. All right. So, so, so, yeah, not doing it. Okay. So the intruder with a backpack arrested last night after breaching security at the White House complex. Now, don't we have armed guards on top of the White House? Haven't we spent another few $8 gazillion on extending the height of the fence around the White House?

Don't we have like landmines placed all over the White House? We've got dogs that fly over the landmines so they don't get blown up, but they attack people. We have all this. And yet the Secret Service officer by the South entrance stumbles upon a guy with a backpack that doesn't belong. Oh, hey. Goes out for a smoke and there's a guy with a backpack there. Oh, what are you doing here? You don't belong here.

We're going to arrest you. I mean, isn't there, some kind of motion lights? I mean, I've got a motion light. My garage, a cat walks by the thing goes on. This guy jumps the fence and gets to the White House? That's a problem. That's a problem. That's a serious problem.

I mean, the safety of the president and his family is at hand. That's a problem. And, you know, whether you, I go back, harken back to the Barack Obama days and the breaches of the White House, that's still a problem. All right? These people are our president. I mean, they're the leader of the free world. Well, at least.

Okay, they're the leader of the United States. And, I mean, that's a problem. That needs to be addressed. I thought we already addressed cleaning house at the Secret Service and the CIA. But I guess not. Not the CIA, Secret Service. I guess they're still, you know, doing rails on Hooker's stomachs or something.

I don't know. I mean, they're doing body shots. Oh, is that a guy in a backpack? Just a minute. Let me get this, let me hit this, let me hit this bump. I mean, come on. That's a problem. That needs to be addressed.

And some would say, if Donald really wanted to send an example, I'd drag that guy right out in front of the White House, man. Turn the cameras on. Turn the cameras on. Just shoot him. This man tried to get into my home. Boom. And walk away.

Oh No, wait, that's what dictators do. No, I don't want him to do that. No, I don't want him to do that. Let it be fantastic YouTube footage. Right there with his backpack on and everything. Just drag him out, turn on the lights. You guys got the cameras rolling?

This man breached the White House. Boom. Walk away. Let's drop the gun and walk away. Donald J. Trump. All right, so we'll go back to the Department of Justice for a moment as we're on to the Trump thing. Okay, so we told some attorneys that were appointed. Their job is no more get out.

And they're mad because they didn't get, he didn't give us any warning. When we found out about it, some of us just got the memo, some of us, heard about it on TV. Some of us just heard about it. We're so darn hurt. Okay. You should have known, if you're an Obama appointee, A, why didn't you leave?

Oh, wait, I know why. Because you're a little mole weasling your way around. Can you be a mole in a weasel? And, yeah, you can be a mole weasling around. And tough. That's my answer. That should have been Donald Trump's answer to. Tough.

Why are they still there? Why are they still there? I mean, the Attorney General has been, I know he's stepped into a firestorm from the very beginning. But, bye. As soon, I mean, Trump, buy, they made a big deal about the ambassadors.

Why wasn't it the, you know, these federal attorneys? Bye. Have a nice day. Get out. Oh, and the backpack and everything with stuff. in it? Yeah, no. Oh, and the federal cell phone you've been using? Yeah, no. Bye. Here's your check. Good luck, God bless. They're probably

needing some help in Chicago. Bye. Seriously, that's agonizing. All right. I want to go back to my Rolls-Royce story because I'm still struggling with what I should do. I'm still struggling with whether I should you know, push my Darum, Darum at the car dealership Auto Nation.

I'm, oh, why do I keep slipping that? And, I mean, it's just one of the, you know, franchises of Auto Nation. It's not the entire Auto Nation or anything. I mean, not like one company has one name over all these car dealerships

like Auto Nation. Oh, wait, they do. Wait, they do. Huh. Weird. Anyway, the, uh, And I got it. I went through the entire story. You can go back to the podcast unless I went through the whole entire story of what happened. I know.

And it's not apparently the inter... Do the paper away. The intermediate drive shaft coupler is not a safety issue. I got it. So since it's not a safety issue and, you know, I bought a... Look, I bought her. Used Rolls-Royce. Shoot me.

Okay? I didn't get a new one. I couldn't afford it. I couldn't afford a brand new role. This was in pretty good shape. They knocked off a couple of bucks because it was used. They did a little bit of work on it.

I guess the work they did on it was just because it was a safety issue. Don't worry about that drive shaft. That's just an intermediate coupler that's worn out and will make noise under the dash and hood. every time you start it and drive down the road. Nobody will notice that.

Don't worry about that. So I'm still in my five-day window of able to, I'm supposed to be able to, according to this is what they told me when I bought it, right? Five days. Five days with the used, you know, as-is thing, whatever it is, I got five days. I can decide whether I want it or not, or I just bring it back. And the deal's off.

Do I push it? Do I pull in there after work today? Just pull in and say, you know what? If you guys aren't going to fix this, I don't want it. Take it back. Deals off. I've got to be willing to walk away. Right?

I mean, you have to be willing to walk away. And I don't know that I am because I like the rolls. Okay, I like the rolls. Nice. When you see it, when you see me on the road, you won't be able to tell it to rolls because it looks different than a rolls, to some people. You know, this particular rolls General Motors made.

And this particular rolls was a few tens of thousand dollars cheaper. But to me, man, does it look like a rose? So bad. I want to dare him. So I'm so mad at myself for questioning this. I'm really mad at myself for questioning this because I want to. Look, if it was a lot of money, not the car, but the, what, to be fixed. It was a lot of money, you know, then I would not have a problem pulling it back

in and saying, just take it. I'm not going to, you know, I'll go find another car. Because the car that I don't have anymore, which they gave me a trade in value of, of dirt, by the way, I could have sold it to the illegals down the street for more than they gave me for it. Why didn't you? Because I just didn't, okay, get off me. That's gone, right? You're not getting that back. They're saying, even if I wonder if I do get it back. I wonder if they have to hold it for five days. Because if I go in and say the deal's off, that was part of the deal, right?

I mean, the trade was part of the deal. So if I say this deal is off, do I get my deposit, do I get my down payment back and my car that isn't really legal to drive on the road? Yeah. We'll give you auto-nation tickets, bonus tickets. You can use those for anything we have in the Auto Nation Nation. So, I don't know. I'm sorry that I've just hung up on this, okay? I apologize.

I do. I apologize. I do. I just can't get it out of my head. Okay. I just can't get it out of my head. I see where the TSA is implementing new pat-down screening procedures. Come fly with me.

Come fly, come fly away. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. They're telling people. They've alerted police departments that they're going to upgrade their screening process to be prepared for more inquiries from unhappy people. Just go through the scanner.

We all want to fly. No, we don't want to be touched, usually, by her or him. I mean, I get it. I got it. But, now someone tweeted me last night at Jeff E.MRA that actually was a pretty good idea. And I'm thinking about attempting it.

If selected for comprehensive TSA screening, can you self-identify as a female to request a female screener? That's genius right there. Genius. I am identifying as a woman right now. Don't you dare touch me. But then, you know, obviously they're going to slow down the whole process, right? They put the red lights on the machines.

Everything's... I mean, they shut everything down, and you'll be there forever, and you'll miss your flight. Yes, you can self-identify as a woman today, but we won't be able to screen you until Thursday. so you'll miss your flight and then you're you're done right so I mean it's funny and it'd be a nice try and I hope someone does it

I'm actually kind of thinking about doing it to be funny right right and they might do that that's a good point did you say that on the air no

you I'm telling you that's not a bet that's what they're going to do they're going to go we have it We have a trans agent down on gate three. We'll bring him her down. And they'll take care of it for you, okay? Don't worry about it.

So that's what's going to happen. Yep, that's what they're going to do. And you'll still miss your flight because him, her, will be busy down on gate four and you're on gate 12. Him her, we needed it at gate 12. Him her needed it at gate 12. Him her needed it at gate 12 for a pet. down and you'll be left standing there with your thumb where they're going to put it

later and uh whereas there's a doing good there it is i want to talk about a doing good story at an airport because it is possible to do good at the airport right so this guy uh goes to the airport taking his daughter they're going on a trip uh and i'll tell you the story as as it's told as a heartwarming story. And then I'll tell you how I look at. Okay, so it's the heartwarming story. A picture of a woman buying a ticket at an airline counter has gone viral. Photo caption tells the story of a father

who was checking in for a flight with his two-year-old daughter when he found out that his daughter's ticket would not be free. Oh, no. No, everyone has to pay for their tickets when their children are over two. The gentleman was checking his flight when the agent asked how old. old his daughter was. He said she had recently turned two. Dumb. Oh, I'm supposed to wait. Oh, wait. I'm supposed to wait before I tell you. The agent then asked if she had a ticket. The man was confused because he was under the impression she could ride for free. When you're

under two! I'm supposed to stop. Wait, I'm supposed to wait until we get through the heartwarming part. So the man was overwhelmed with emotion and crying because of the high cost of the second ticket for his young daughter. He stepped aside to make a few calls, hugging his daughter and grabbing his head. You can tell he was heartbroken. Suddenly, a stranger approaches the emotional father. After talking for just a bit, she went to the ticket counter, pointed at the young girl and said, I want to buy her a ticket. The agent, shocked, asked, you're aware that the last-minute ticket on the flight would be $749? Unfazed.

The woman pulled out her credit card and paid in full price. The agent kept talking about her goosebumps while the man hugged the woman and asked for her name to repay. The woman just kept saying, don't worry about it. She knew she wanted to help that man and his daughter, no matter what the cost. The story was posted on social media sites. Love what matters.

Oh wait, I'm supposed to wait. The site collects submissions, counting strangers, active kindness and love. The post ends asking people to share the story, so the woman's active kindness would be known to more people than just those in the situation. Thank you. As of yesterday, the story was more than 165,000 likes, 32,000 shares, hundreds of comments.

One user wrote that she knows the woman in the picture. I won't share who this lady is, but I do know her. I know her family, kids, and grandkids. get together frequently to discuss how they can use the abundance and blessings they get to serve and give back to others. She is an inspiration every time I see her and is constantly giving freely. She is so full of love for everyone and does what is needed without being asked. Bless her.

A couple things. A. Okay. You know they tell you that your kid has to be under two for free. Okay. You know that. So when asked at the counter, yes, lie, yes. How old is your daughter?

One and a half. I did that last year. They didn't buy it. My daughter goes, Daddy, I'm eight. I mean, I gave it a shot, right? Second, I got to say this next. Secondly, that's a good con on that lady. Okay, you crying and holding your head and making a couple of pretend phone calls.

hoping that somebody at the airport is going to foot the bill, let alone for an airline that's ripping you off for $750? Is that an auto nation plane? I mean, oh, I mean, come on. We're sorry, your child cannot fly today. She doesn't have a ticket. You answered the question incorrectly. That'll be $749.

Really? Really? Did I say she was two? I meant one and a half. She's going to be two. Her birthday's tomorrow. Something. I mean,

well, you're two, aren't you? Tomorrow? I mean, son, come on. They're going to let you on the flight.

I mean, if you're, well, she's two. When I booked the flight, she wasn't two. Okay, dummy,

then know that going in. And he's crying and holding his head at the airport. How many of you, raise your hands, and I know this lady, God bless her, for helping the guy out with his daughter flying, and she's probably a wonderful person and doing wonderful things. It says so on a Facebook post. But you've been caught.

How many of you walking in an airport? Think of yourself, right? You're already look at the TSA line thinking, the rubber gloves are being snapped on for you. You're thinking for sure. And now it's whether you're going. And now it's whether you go through the machine or not. They can push you through the machine.

And you're there. It doesn't matter. They still, you've been selected for comprehensive screening. How many of you see the guy crying and go? Sucks to be him. This is the Jeff Fisher Show. On the Blaze Radio Network. 2017 is going to be a volatile economic year.

We may see politicians throughout the world attempting to control central bank policies. Several renowned financial analysts have. warned that political interference in central bank policies may mean our economic misses of inflation and growth targets. Gold is an international currency that can't be issued or controlled by governments. If you don't have the only hard currency that has outlasted every politician and every failed idea of governments for centuries, you need to speak to Gold Line right now and learn how easy it is to add gold to your portfolio or IRA. Now is the time to diversify your financial portfolio by adding gold. Call 1-800-913 gold. Buying real gold,

is easy and fast at Goldline. And you're going to be happy that you finally made the call. 1-800-913-4653. Goldline also offers price protection against short-term market fluctuations on qualifying purchases. So buy with confidence. Read Goldline's important risk information

and find out of buying gold is right for you. Call Goldline, 1-800-913-4653. This is the Jeff Fisher Show. Only on the Blaze Radio Network. The Jeff Fisher Show. I'm just thinking about the TSA and pat-downs and wanding and everything. Hey, okay, I know that we're not supposed to profile,

but how about we profile? Right? I mean, it's kind of common sense. When I see, and I was, there have been a couple times where I've been held back at the TSA line by people that I was traveling with. Once in a while I like to speak up. Once in a while I like to say things.

You know, one thing leads to another. You know, some people don't get my humor. Other times it's not humorous. I'm just like, what are you doing, you idiot? And so when I see a TSA person stop a little girl between the ages of, I don't know, 9 and 12, and a person who could go, could be the double to Muhammad Atta going through the other line, and they're stopping the 12-year-old, that's stupid.

Okay? That's stupid. Now, if you say something, that's not where they want you to say, see something, say something. They want that someplace else. They don't want it at the TSA line. because I was seriously like Are you kidding me? And everybody turned around

and the guy I'm flying with grabs my arm and looks at me like shut up I mean he's literally squeezing Shut up And I mean everybody turned around I'm like are you kidding me Shut up Shut up

Shut up And so I never finished. I never finished my, why are you checking that girl when the lookalike to Muhammad Atta is going through the other line? With no one asking a second question, just whoop onto the plane. But you're messing with this 12-year-old girl.

Are you dumb? Shut up. I never got to that. All I got to was, are you kidding me? And when I never finished after that other people, they just turned back around. And my head, screaming! But all I hear is my friend squeezing my arm going,

shut up, shut up. So I just go. I just want to go through the scanner. Leave me alone. Let me alone. Look, I'm 800 pounds. I got a knee replacement. Just put me through the x-ray machine.

Okay? Once in a while, something happens where they go, They scanned my knee or they scanned my butt because something wasn't right. And then I'm gone. I don't have to mess around. I'm happy. I put my arms up.

Okay. Look, if the lady at the TSA window or the guy, either one, wants to take my x-ray and save it and go home and pleasure themselves to my x-ray, have at it. Have at it. I'm all yours. Okay, you're welcome.

All right? Because I don't want to be... I want to get out my plane, okay? I want to just get out my flight. That's all I want. That's all I want. All right, we've got a great NFL story about players suing the NFL.

It's a class action lawsuit. I don't know that I have time to get into it. It's such a great story. You know, I should just do a separate Facebook list. live or another separate podcast on this NFL abuse story of pain killers and other drugs. It's a great story. It's talking about the NFL, you know, crossing state lines and claiming that they're

prescribing and brokering drugs, you know, illegally to their players. Some players are suing them class action before saying, you know, they, you know, allowed them to abuse different pain killers and stuff. Yeah. you were the one saying I'm hurt I'm hurt I want to play and now you're mad at them for giving you something so that you didn't feel the pain and you could play

no no honey no baby go back into your room go back into your room until you've thought this through and then you can come out we'll talk again I mean it's absolutely agonizing now some of the things that see I'm getting into it it's going to be it's a long story and it's fascinating about how

They cross jurisdictional lines and how the NFL has really tried to get laws changed and really got together and had doctors specifically for the away teams from local markets so that they could prescribe and give the drugs during the games that the teams were away. Really? Come on. It's just government regulation at its finest. really and to think that now kind of like the concussion thing it really irritates me that let's say as an example

a year from now we find out that this little foam pad over the microphone I'm talking into causes lip cancer because my lip touches it don't tell Lawrence and now I may I may think about joining some sort of class action lawsuit

against the foam company I got to rethink my analogy a little bit because I would sue the hell out of this place I have to come up with a better analogy because if this foam causes lip cancer this place is going under all right it's going to be the

Jeffie Studios. I'm not going to be having to make designer mumoos. It's going to be Mercury Jeffey Studios. So you better hope this doesn't cause cancer, Mr. Beck. Anyway, I'll do a special Facebook live after the show with Brad.

Brad's always, we got to do a Facebook live. You got any stories? What am I? All right, whatever, Brad. You know, I'm here for you. A little Facebook thing. But we'll do the story on the NFL on the Facebook live. Another favorite story that I saw that was so, well, it was just fascinated because, first of all, I love trains.

And any time you see train accidents or train, I mean, life in the train age, man, I love them. I always have. I've always wanted to be a conductor. I always wanted to go to the Burt Reynolds School of train conducting. But I'm not living my dream. So I'm just a, I know, I know. Listen, don't feel sorry for me. It's okay.

I'm living my dream in other ways. But a train collides with the charter bus, which is horrible, right? I mean, unknown Das spokesman. The, they talk about the story and the bus was on the tracks, and there was a guy that was helping people get out of the bus because it was stalled, and it was great. And it talked about the people on the bus, and it talked about how bad the train hit the bus.

But there was actually the line that talked about the train engineers were not injured. And I thought, is that really part of the story? I mean, does anyone think the train engineer would be, are going to be injured in a wreck? No. Train hits car. Engineers fine.

Yeah. That's what, uh, that's what happens. That's what happens. The train engine stays there. The vehicles in front of the train move. The engineers pissed because he's, got to get out. This is so stupid.

And we also have all my zoo story. We'll just get some stories, because we're coming up on the end of the day. And the only thing I want to talk about is the NFL drugs and whether I should bluff my way at the dealership of Auto Nation with my car.

It's the only thing I care about right now. And I do care that you say some, have some prayers and some nice thoughts for Dom Theodore and his wife, Jen, who I told you at the beginning of the show, So Dom Theodore is the head of Blaze Radio and also oversees a little bit of the Glenn Beck radio program as far as, you know, dealings with Premier, that kind of thing. And Philin host.

And he's also, you know, well known in the radio industry. And, you know, and they were in an accident last night, had a collision. Jen is as okay as she can be with bumps and bruises. And Dom Theodore was in the rider's seat, was not driving. They were not intoxicated. They were not. I don't know about the driver that hit them head on. And he went to one surgery last night at about 1 o'clock in the morning.

And it looked as though they were going to have to do another one. so just have a nice thought for them today as you're doing your travels and know that when you hear the you never think about it when you hear the stories of in just a split second you know my mom always used to

it happens so fast just a split second one minute you're driving down the road and the next minute you're slammed up against the embunkment I'm not being funny that's the way it happens. And so just, you know, have a nice thought and a prayer for them today

and hug your own kids. Give them a hug. They know that, so that they know you love them. And know that, my mother was right. Wow. My mom was right. You got me, Mom.

Okay, this time you were right. You were right. You're listening to the Jeff Fisher Show. The Blaze Radio Network is the Jeff Fisher Show. Tired of the way you've been restricted by pants. Moos by Jeffie. I'm telling you, we are doing that. I want my designer moves bad.

Are you wearing a Jeffie? I've never been as comfortable as I've been 30 years since I got my Jeffie. I am in love with that. I want that to happen immediately. Now you can go to jeffyfisher.com, J-E-F-F-F-Y-F-S-H-E-R dot com

and get my Talking Walking Dead t-shirts that match up, you know, talk about Talking Walking Dead every week on our podcast, Talking Walking Dead, on the Blaze Radio Network under the Jeff Fisher show. But, man, we've got to, I mean, 1791, whatever. Gucci, whatever. Ralph Lauren,

big time, whatever. Jeffie. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Are you wearing Jeffie? Yes. I'll tell you, I was so I was so tired of being restricted by pants

and tight shirts. That's why I got Jeffie. Because Moomu was probably already gone, right? Mummo's done. You're not going to be able to use Mummo without them saying, you owe us millions of dollars for even speaking the words Mumu. So, it's just got to be

Jeff. But you know, when you're wearing a Jeffie, you've got a little bit of material hanging off you. Okay. All right, so it's St. Patrick's Day, right? Today is St. Patrick's Day? Is that right? Is today's St. Yeah, they're celebrating. I know that Dallas has got their parade, and they shut down downtown, and everybody wears their little green things.

So have fun. Go get drunk and eat your green food and drink your green beer. What is it they always drink that I just hate? Cabbage is a cabbage? St. Patty's Day. They have corned beef and cabbage. Oh, yeah, corned beef and cabbage. Oh, God.

Oh, nasty. I do not. Oh, ooh. Oh. Man, do I not want that. I see the giraffe cam. You know, we talked to, I love zoos, man. Zoos are a little pet peeve of mine that I love.

People don't like them. I like them. So they've got the big giraffe cam. This new giraffe is, this giraffe is ready to have a kid here soon. Well, the giraffe is actually going to have a baby giraffe, not a kid. But they've got the cam on it. And, you know how we talked to the orangutanang in the zoo here in Texas, the head little baby. So they've got the cam on the giraffe.

What is going to start happening, though? It happened in France. It's happened in Venezuela. But the poachers came into the zoo, killed the white rhino, shot the rhino in the head, sawed off the horns, and took off. I mean, the rhino horn dust is worth like thousands of dollars an ounce. It's supposed to be an aphrodisiac. Honey, have you taken your white rhino horn dust yet?

No, not yet, but Wait till it kicks in. Come on. Stop it. That's got to be a Southeast Asia thing. Oh, yep. It sure is. So it's probably, you know,

unless you haven't verified, you don't know that white rhino horn powder dust that you're purchasing might be fake. It might be fake. You never know. And we have time change. Time change weekend. Don't forget to turn your stupid clocks ahead.

You know, the ones that you don't, that aren't digital. Your cell phone will do it by itself. You're going to have to do your microwave. You're going to have to do your coffee maker. Everything else will be done. And if you have, you know, 100 watches, make sure they're all done by 2 a.m. On Sunday morning, otherwise the police will come and arrest you. We're not having your clock set right.

Got it? Okay. We'll do a Facebook lock. on the NFL, and I'll let you know next week. What happened? You can follow me on Twitter, and I'll let you know what happens if I go up against the Great Auto World. Dare them to fix my car! This is the Jeff Fisher Show.

Only on the Blaze Radio Network.