Chewing the Fat with Jeff Fisher - 4/1/17 Jeff Fisher Show Hour 1: A Day At The DMV

Episode Date: April 1, 2017

Jeffy takes a "quick" trip to the DMV, National Crayon Day celebrations, April Fool's Day jokes, and a student facing charges for having explosives and intending to do damage at their school.Follow Jeffy on Twitter: @JeffyMRALike Jeffy on Facebook: www.facebook.com/JeffFisherRadioFollow Jeffy on Instagram: @jeffymra Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is the Blaze Radio on demand. 2017 is going to be a volatile economic year. We may see politicians throughout the world attempting to control central bank policies. Several renowned financial analysts have warned that political interference in central bank policies may mean our economic misses of inflation and growth targets. Gold is an international currency that can't be issued or controlled by governments. If you don't have the only hard currency that has outlasted every politician and every failed idea, of governments for centuries, you need to speak to Gold Line right now and learn how easy it is

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Now. Stand clear. Life signs stable. It's alive. Set it loose. This is the Jeff Fisher Show on the Blaze Radio Network. Hello. Man, has it been a long week? I don't know about you. I hope you had a week that was not or did not feel as long as I felt this one was.

Let's just breathe a second and let the oxygen take over your brain. Those of you that follow me on Twitter at Jeff EMRA know that yesterday I thought I would do a quick stop at the DMV. First mistake is never think you're going to do a quick stop at the DMV. You never think that at all. I get there and there's, as I would turn the corner to walk into the office, there's people standing in the hallways. And as I look, oh, this is what I wanted to see. Good. And, you know, I mean, I had the line laughing anyway.

So I walk in, I grab number 82. I look down number 82. No problem. 82. I see the people online. Okay. I look up at the screen, 29. Now, I will say that they moved along pretty good.

You know, we got, wasn't, wasn't a lifetime in the DMV. However, I discovered a way for you to kind of beat the system at the DMV. Okay. I'm going to explain this to you, Ed. You can use it like I did and get out of there even faster. Okay? So you go in there and you grab your number, which obviously I had number 82, and I looked up in, you know, 29.

I mean, it's just like a stab in the heart. You're like 82, and you're hoping for, you know, 80, even 75 would have been okay. Oh. So people are standing up in the hallways, and I don't want to go stand in the hallway. So I just wait a little bit, and somebody got called and went up, so I sat down. Now, I witnessed this a couple of times before I implemented my plan. the girls working, the ladies working, the females, I guess they were females,

they were dressed like what I would consider to be a female behind the counter. There were three of them. Look up at the screen behind them, and they see the number that's lit up. And so they call the next one, 30, and they wait for someone to come up to the window. If no one comes in a fashionable amount of time,

they go 30, they call it twice. If no one comes up at a reasonable time, they moved to the next number. 31. And everybody just sits there with knowing that their number is whatever number they picked. Right?

They're waiting for their number to be called. We're like, sheep. It's sad. So, I watch that, and I'm thinking, well, I'm, I could be 30. Right?

And then so I thought, all right, I'm going to watch them again. They do it again. They call the next number. and sooner or later, you know, they get to a number that nobody, the no person isn't there. Do it again. They wait, a reasonable amount of time, they call it again, you know, 40, 40, 41.

Okay. So, I'm thinking, well, why, I can be that number. All I have to do is tell them I'm that number. So I watch what they do. Now, some people go up with their number in their hand, and they hand it to the lady, and she throws it in the trash. I don't even look at it. Other people go up, they don't even, they're not looking for numbers.

They don't care. So she gets to 60, 60, and nobody stands up and I'm thinking, I'm doing this. I don't care. What's the worst going to happen? I mean, seriously, if they kicked me out, I've got to come back Monday. That's what I have a wife for. So, 60, and I figure what you do, and it works. you wait until they're just about ready to call the next number.

So you know nobody's there. You know that you're not taking, someone else isn't going to stand up and say, that's my number. I've got the tag right here. Because if that happens, then, you know, then you've got a fight started. If that happens, then you need to go, oh, oh, oh, that's right. You do. Okay, I'm sorry.

I was just spaced out. I'm sorry, go ahead. And you sit back down. Right? I mean, what are they going to do? So just as they're getting ready to call the number, you know, they call the number, 40 they wait for somebody to get up

nobody gets up 40 wait for a little while nobody gets up now just about as she's ready to call 41 I say I stand up

and I went oh 40 like I've been in the zone I didn't even realize that she was calling 40 and I walk up to the window everybody goes oh I just walk up to the window

I have my I have my 82 in my pocket take care of business, I'm out of there. You're welcome. You're welcome. Okay? So when you use this and you get busted and they throw you in jail for cheating at the DMV,

you didn't hear this from me. But I'm telling you, it works. So just remember, you got to let them, you got to let it go through a couple of times. Because, you know, you can't just walk in and walk up. You got to, you know, sit in the crowd a little bit and, you know, try to be, you know, just part of the crowd for a little while. But when they've got that, I mean, I was 82. And they're at 29 when I walk in.

I can't. And what's the worst other than when you walk out and you look at the guy that walked in right with just before you and you look at him and go, see you later. I mean, what's going to happen? One guy, maybe a guy comes up and says, he's not, he has not 40. He came in with me and I've got 81. Really?

What? What? I don't have 40? Oh, man, I don't. I have 82. I'm sorry. And you sit back down. I'm sorry.

I don't know what I'm doing. But they don't check. So I'm telling you, get your number, and you got to do it just before they're ready to call the next number so you know no one is there with that number. You let them call it once. You look around, you just kind of sit there, wait to see if somebody, you know,

if you feel somebody coming up to the window, no, call it again. You're just kind of sitting there. Remember, you're part of the crowd. 40. She looks back and she's ready to click it to 41 on that screen. And that's when you stand up. Just before she yells 41. Stand up.

Oh, 40. Oh. You've been in that trance. Up to the window you go. You don't even, in fact, I believe that you could crinkle up the number and hand it to her. She would just throw it away. Wouldn't even look at it. But that's pushing your luck a little because she might go.

Hey! This isn't 40. Sit your big butt back down. So you don't even attempt that. I mean, you might attempt it if you want to have some fun and you've got time to kill. Who doesn't have eight hours to kill it to DMV? So you just keep the number. You don't even give it to them.

You just go up and you start getting your paperwork out on the counter. Get it done. Like you were 40. That's your number. Move on. You're welcome. Now, and you just got it. I'm telling you it works.

I was amazed. watched it happen more, that whole scene of calling the number twice. Nobody's standing up and they call the next number. And everybody, everybody's just sitting there, I've got 50. I got away until they called 50. They didn't call 50. They called 33.

Nobody's 33. Hopefully 34 is going to come. I've got 50. No. No. That is like, Someone standing on a street corner with the don't walk sign blinking saying don't walk, don't walk, don't walk, and there's no traffic. No, I'm walking.

I'm sorry, there's no automobiles on the road. I'm going to cross. I've seen it. I've witnessed it. People standing on a street corner waiting for the walk sign to go. With no traffic on the roads. No. No.

I refuse to be a sheep in this country anymore. You know, at least until I get caught. Here we go. This is the Jeff Fisher Show on the Blaze Radio Network. 2017 is going to be a volatile economic year. We may see politicians throughout the world attempting to control central bank policies, Several renowned financial analysts have warned that political interference in central bank policies may mean our economic misses of inflation and growth targets. Gold is an international currency that can't be issued or controlled by governments.

If you don't have the only hard currency that has outlasted every politician and every failed idea of governments for centuries, you need to speak to Gold Line right now and learn how easy it is to add gold to your portfolio or IRA. Now is the time to diversify your financial portfolio by adding gold. Call 1-800-913 gold. Buying real gold is easy and fast at Goldline. And you're going to be happy that you finally made the call. 1-800-913-4653. Goldline also offers price protection against short-term market fluctuations on qualifying purchases.

So buy with confidence. Read Goldline's important risk information and find out of buying gold is right for you. Call Goldline, 1-800-913-4653. The Jeff Fisher Show. Welcome to the broadcast. 88893033 is the phone number. You, of course, can follow me on Twitter. Then I say, of course, because you should be doing it anyway.

At Jeff Emorym.R.A. Jeff Fisher Radio for Facebook and at Jeff EMRA for Instagram. So did you celebrate yesterday? Did you celebrate National Cran Day? What? You didn't? Crayola had a big announcement yesterday on National Cran Day. I wonder who was responsible for creating.

National Cran Day. I wonder who was responsible for creating National Cran Day. Anyway, Crayola, kicking a color out to the curb. Very sad, very sad news on National Cran Day. The Dandelion Cran kicked to the curb. Now they're trying, they threw him a bone. They threw him an extra color, an extra cran bone by saying, oh, well, we're not kicking him to the curb right just yet.

He's going to retire. We're going to send him on a, you know, a tour. So you're going to get sick of the dandelion grand real soon. Every morning show in America. And the dandelion grand is here. Oh, it's been a good run. Yep, it's been a good run. I've been, you know, I've been in the box since, oh, since 1990, I think, something like that.

Maybe not even that long. When did the stupid dandelion crue? go in there. But he's going to be replaced. They said they had this big thing. I'm going to have this huge announcement. They had giant crayon boxes and Times Square. And yet, then they're finishing was, you know what? We're not going to, we're not going to tell you what color it is. We're going to let you know that it's going to, it's going to be a shade of blue. A shade of blue. And you get to pick it. Yay! We thought we'd give you a chance to pick a hue yourself and nominate it for the new blue.

Just choose from the palette below and hit the submit button. We'll aggregate all the votes and come up with the most popular choices. So you think cool, we get to pick it. How cool is that? No. This vote is not binding. Crayola is picking its own color blue and will reveal more details in May. since the blues on your screen can produce are not exactly the same as those that can be infused in wax. There isn't a perfect correspondence between what you see

in your phone or computer and what your toddler is using to deface the dining room walls. You don't get to pick. Go ahead and pick, but you don't get to pick. That's nice of them. We're going to do what we want, but we want you to vote. I want to show you this is the most picked color right here. But we like this color better.

Now, when you think of it, I know a guy used to work with a hundred years ago. No, it's maybe 50 years ago. He used to think of your little sad things you do in life to make you happy for just a moment. He used to keep a box of crayons in his drawer, in his dressing room drawer, so that every once in a while or every day or whatever the hell he felt like it, he could bring out the crayola box and sniff the crayon. because he like the smell of the crayons.

I know. I know. I know. I know. I can think of a lot better things to sniff. But anyway, hey, it is the first time Creole's retired colors. Now, they've got to be, if you think about it,

I mean, Creole has got to be struggling a little bit, right? I mean, I don't know. They're in every classroom, I guess, in America. Every kid wants to color with the crans, and we've got 18 billion crans laying around the house. Did you know that when they break, you can't use them any more? more? I know. You think, well, no, you can, Jeff. They give you a little sharpener on the box

and you can peel the paper and still use them? Nope. Nope, you've got to buy brand new crans. That's a fact. That's how you end up with 18 billion crans in your house. Because as soon as it breaks, we can't throw it away, but we can't use it anymore. We need new crans. That's a Crayola law. So apparently in 1990, they retired eight colors. Mays, lemon yellow, blue, gray, raw umber, green, blue, orange, red, orange, yellow, and violet blue. Now, they replaced them with vivid tangerine.

Oh, and Dandelion. So Dandelion's been around since 1990. He's had a pretty good run. It's time to retire. Jungle green, Cyriline, fuchsia, Teal blue, royal blue, and wild strawberry. Those colors better sweat a little bit.

We've kicked dandelion of the curb. Those guys are on their way out. In 2003, the Crayola's Centennial Celebration. The company retired Blizzard Blue, Magic Mint, Mulberry, and Teal Blue. Oh, yeah, teal got the boot first before Tangerine. Oh, I'm so sorry, Teal. Burnt Sienna, I remember this stupid story. Burr and Siena was saved from retirement.

That's when I found out in 2003. So that's when I found out that the guy worked with a cup of the box of crans in his drawer. Oh, we're just stupid radio show. The colors in 2003 were replaced with Inch Worm, Mango Tango, Tango, Wild Blue Yonder, and Jasbury Jam. So I hope you celebrated. I know that just don't break the law. break the Crayola law. You cannot, the only time that you're allowed to use a broken

cram is when it's the only color that you need at the time and there isn't a fresh box of crayons right there. It's the only time. After that, once they break, you can't use them, you can't throw them away, you have to buy new crans. It's the law. I know. I know. I'm with you. We have the big final four tonight. South Carolina. Zaga, Oregon, North Carolina. You ready for it? I mean, it's exciting news. Exciting news.

We had the female basketball NCAA Final Four going on. Oh, my God, here in Dallas. We've made $18 billion. Money is falling from the sky because of the female NCAA championships. But if we pass a bathroom bill, that money will stop. It wasn't too long ago.

We were told that North Carolina was not. feeling the effects of their bathroom bill and that they were going to stand strong and that's the way it is and then we find out yesterday no actually the day before yesterday North Carolina flip-flopped on their bill because they had to do it by Thursday it was like their year anniversary or something and so they flopped and flipped and that's so good the NCAA is so happy and if it happens here in Texas they'll have to pull their events and money will no longer rain from the sky If Texas, and I'm very sad that North Carolina caved

because I was happy they weren't caving, they were standing strong. Damn it, they were standing strong. And yet, the minority wins again. Take it. So, of course, their comments here in Dallas with the female final four, the only reason you even know there was a team of girls playing is because there was a team that had lost in, you know, 111 games. games or whatever.

They lost here in Dallas last night. It was very sad. They couldn't pull off 112. So now the big thing, now they're going to have to get a whole new ad campaign for the championship because it isn't Yukon going for their 18,000th win in a row. They can't lose. They don't lose.

Now it's, you know, a couple of, teams nobody cares about. But money is raining from the sky. But if we tell people that they have to use the bathroom of the body part that's on them, money will no longer rain from the sky from the NCAA. I'm going to tell you something. Texas better hold strong. And tell the NCAA to get bent.

Get bent. We'll find another way to make some money. Oh, I know all those other universities. Yeah, they'll still stay here. The Blaze Radio Network. One has taken the blood-thening drugs, Zarelto, or Prodexa, and suffered an injury or even died. You could be entitled to substantial financial compensation. Jeff Fisher Show is on.

Welcome to the broadcast. 888-903-33 is the phone number. Thank you so much for coming along for the ride today. I know it's April Fool's Day. And so everybody's going to be trying to pull their little April Fool's jokes on everybody. Hey, Mom, I'm pregnant. Oh, wait, you didn't say April Fool's. Why?

So, yeah, I just don't know what. I was thinking that maybe I should, you know, we should do some kind of April Fool's joke. And then I thought, you know what, you guys are too smart for that. You're right. I couldn't think of anything funny. You guys are too smart for that. And, you know, we used to pull some. Just be ready for it today.

Just be ready. You're out and about. People are going to be, you know, trying to yake your chain for April Fool's. And just, you know, be ready for it. Okay. Because someone's going to catch you. Someone's going to catch you. Hey, your zippers open.

April Fool's. So when that happens, just chuckle and why? when you go to pull that on someone today, you know, just chuckle and keep walking. Gotcha. And keep walking. Now I want to do that today. I promise, I think I will do that today. Out somewhere.

Hey, your zipper's open. April fools. Gotcha. Oh, that'll be funny. Oh, man. Funny? So bad. So bad.

So bad. had a question in my head all week. So an 18-year-old high school student faces charges after the deputies uncovered her plot to carry out a shooting at the school. Now, she's going to be charged with both the possession of explosive materials with the intent to create a destructive device as well as possession of an incendiary material with intent to create a destructive device. Of course they sent her to a mental institution for evaluation.

She was the only person believed to be involved in the plot, and no one else is going to be charged according to this story. And, you know, it looks as though she was acting alone. Well, turns me, I'm a couple of things. One, if she was going to do something bad. I guess it's good we got it now. I mean, and not, you know, obviously I don't want her to kill a bunch of students, co-students, and kill herself in the school and teachers and anyone else.

I don't want anyone else to die. I mean, that's just dumb. But there were no weapons or explosives recovered at the school. Now, her journal is what they are using as huge evidence because it hinted at violence. it saw evidence of mental health issues or what there are a number of emotional issues. I mean, she's an 18-year-old girl in high school, right?

But in the journal and in her diary, it talks about, you know, she found a means to purchase materials. It was to create basically to be a mass shooting type event. But there were no specific names or charges. It contained detailed analysis of every stage of her plan that she expected to encounter, including information she gathered from speaking with the school resource officer.

She had the means and material. And the sheriff, it was very clear to us that she had means and material to cause significant damage to herself to the student body, faculty. We felt it was going to be carried out. There was no doubt in our minds that we averted a disaster up there. Talking about the high school. And she was also enrolled in law enforcement and a criminal justice program at the schools, districts, career, and technology center.

Now, twofold on this. What if tomorrow she wrote in her diary, man, I've got all this stuff together, and I've decided that this would be wrong. I wanted to show how easy it was for someone to attain all this merchandise and this whole thing, I just wanted to prove how easy it was to get all this stuff, but it's not real. And I'm going to use this in a book. I'm going to use this.

I want to make a short film, form of the film club. Or I want to have a presentation at the police, at the criminal justice program. Now what? So we've stopped her early, which, again, you know, I got it. I know that we don't want anything bad to happen and we're not, you know, what are we supposed to do, Jeff? Wait until she's actually shooting people? Well, maybe.

I don't know. Am I happy that no one's hurt? Yes. She'll, you know, no, she's in a mental, they'll give her a mental evaluation and then she'll go to prison and go to jail. You know she will. or they'll just say she's cuckoo and lock her up for 20 years and then she'll get out. Well, yeah, she was the one that will just have the stuff in her diary and had collected all this stuff but really didn't do anything. Yeah, that's her.

So I'm kind of torn at that. But, you know, I'll let that go if it's all for our safety and, you know, I got it. Terrorism, the whole thing. Okay. I'll let the pre-crime arrest. Although, you know, they'll say, well, it's not. a crime. It's not pre-crime. She had possession of explosive materials. We believe she had the intent to create a destructive device, as well as incendiary material with, we believe that she had

the intent to create a destructive device. So there's a crime there. Okay, you got me. Second thing I'm torn out of this story. How hard is it to be the parent? of this girl. The reason that they arrested this girl, got her diary, found all this material, was because of the parents.

One of her parents notified school officials to the threat of the school. They came forward, they did the right thing, said the sheriff's department, and she was removed from class on Thursday after the now they're trying to keep

one of the parents stepped forward later in the story. Her dad called school. Oh, okay. I wonder what parent it was. Okay, thank you. So how hard is it for the dad to

realize that your child is doing this? Right? Now you think obviously when you, look, we all know there's some kind of problem there. Is it a problem enough to get her arrested? I mean, if it were my kid, would you turn her in like that? I don't know.

I don't know. I don't know the answer. You know that you could get her help mentally if you thought she needed it on your own. No horrific crime has been committed yet. So I don't know that you could turn your kid in like that. I mean, I would love to, we should talk to the dad. And he's not speaking, of course. I'd like to know how that transpired in his mind.

Now, it said here that she wasn't, you know, the act was supposed to happen April 5th in her head or in her diary and all the plans. She had it planned out for April 5th. So I don't know if the dad knew that then when he turned her and he may not have gotten that far in the diary But so as a parent if you got that far you knew you had you know she wasn't going to do anything Horrific until the fifth at least that was her original plan so You don't talk to her first you don't confront her first

It'd be very hard it would be very hard to just call the police on your child. Now, maybe we find out that she's been, you know, a problem child for a number of years. We all know that parents know their children and know that what they're capable of, or at least most of them think they do. And if your child is needing help of some kind, most parents know, that kid's been that way ever since he was two. that kid's been a jerk since he was four years old. I hated that kid. Maybe she was one of those.

We've all had the families of banshees around. You know your kids. So maybe she was one of those. And maybe, you know, the dad's like, this is it. But I am really struggling.

I'd be really hard for me to turn in my child at this point. She had other stuff. They found the stuff, they found the diary, and the dead didn't confront her first. He called the authorities, and then they came and arrested her. And flip it around, what if, you know, so he doesn't call, and she does something that day. Let's say, you know, nothing, I know the diary said April 5th, but she's got all this stuff,

and maybe she had, you know, we're going to do a test run today that he didn't see in the diary. So he doesn't call the authorities. Something happens. They come to search the residence and they find all this stuff. All yeah, all the stuff's right down there. I looked at it earlier today. I was going to talk to her later about it.

I mean, he gets in trouble for that probably. You didn't call authorities right away when you saw this? My daughter's stuff. I was going to call. I was going to talk to her about it. So he probably gets arrested then, dragged out of there for not calling the authorities immediately. But by calling the authorities immediately, that had, I mean, got to tear your heart out. Got to tear your heart out.

And it's good, you know, we stopped for our safety. For our safety, we stopped a possible future crime. So it's all good. It's all good. This is The Jeff Fisher Show. Lays Radio Network. The Jeff Fisher Show. All right.

Welcome to it. So, I guess this happened on Thursday. Is that right? The Thursday, right? Thursday, the fire in Atlanta that brought down the interstate? So I was thinking it was last night, but it's Thursday. Yeah, okay. Atlanta firefighters first get the call.

Thursday night. Okay. 40 foot height of the wall of fire. 350 feet is the length of the length of. sections of I-85 that need to be replaced in each direction. 50% of traffic increase on I-285 bypassed day of class. My God, they might as well just shut down Atlanta. 22-220,000 plus estimated number of cars that drive through that stretch of I-85 daily.

Not anymore. Okay, so first they're not going to stop. It's going to slow down the traffic around Atlanta a little bit. Perhaps some of the busier intersections, they could put a item. know, a police officer on the corner and he could direct traffic to keep the flow going so they wouldn't have to worry about sitting through a regular light that doesn't intend on having 18 million cars. That's just a thought.

You know, that takes me on a, I will do the fire story, but I really pisses me off about, this happens a lot in this neck of the woods here in Texas. They have construction, so they shut down the roads. We just shut them down. We just shut them down. We know that 18 million cars drive this road every day. We're going to shut them down. And we're going to detour them over there.

You know, through the neighborhoods that have a red light that goes green, red, green, red, green, red. Because usually there's only a few cars that drive through there. But today we've shut down the interstate. So we're directing of 18 million cars through this neighborhood. You think, you would think. A, worst case scenario, you get a police officer out there directing traffic so that it flows, so maybe a few more cars could go through the intersection than normal. Or maybe we think ahead, the Department of Transportation.

Oh, on this day, we're shutting down the interstate. You know, we should probably reallocate the red lights in the neighborhoods we're detouring traffic so that they're green longer on the heavier flows. Do you think? Does that happen? on a side note in Atlanta they arrested a man for intentionally setting a fire now they're calling it a huge fire

I don't think he allegedly I don't think he said it to be a huge fire it was a homeless guy so I'm sure this is the fire that he's set to eat his dinner or keep warm right under the bridge and he's in this state fenced in area that had PVC pipes and then it got out of hand and he was like holy crap I got I gotta get out of here

I think that's a little bit bigger. I think we should talk to the construction people, too. A fire brings down an interstate. What kind of shady building materials have they been using? That's all I'm asking. This is the Jeff Fisher Show. Only on the Blaze Radio Network.