Chewing the Fat with Jeff Fisher - 7/1/17 Jeff Fisher Show Hour 3: Murdering Zodiacs Of Fake News

Episode Date: July 1, 2017

- What kind of killer would you be?- Types of things we get sucked into on Facebook- Jeffy is fashion- Fake news stories of the week- A look for Independence Day celebrationsFollow Jeffy on Twitter: @JeffyMRALike Jeffy on Facebook: www.facebook.com/JeffFisherRadioFollow Jeffy on Instagram: @jeffymra Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The Blaze Radio Network On Demand. The experiment was a success. Begin Life Force reboot program. Now. Stand clear. Signs stable. It's alive. Set it loose. This is the Jeff Fisher Show on the Blaze Radio Network.

Welcome to the broadcast. number three on July 1st, 2017. Yes, are you like me looking forward to going to the fireworks on the fourth and seeing beautiful explosions in the sky? But I did find a kind of a cool place to watch some fireworks last year, so we'll see if we can, no one knows about it. It's a secret place. So I hope you have a good holiday weekend.

I know what's just getting started now. some people still have to, I mean, those of you in retail are like, what are you talking about? We're still working. I know. And on behalf of people who frequent your establishments, thank you. Appreciate it. And then those of you, some of you may have to work on Monday. I mean, Fourth of July, like on a Tuesday and Wednesday, that sucks.

Unless you could take the whole thing off. I mean, if you could take, say, Saturday, Sunday, Monday, Tuesday off. I mean, right? And plus is the fourth. Who wants to work on the fifth? You're out late shooting off fireworks. You've burned your hand with a couple of sparklers, right? You've burned the kid with a Roman candle.

You didn't mean to shoot it like that, but it fired backwards and burned some skin off the kid. Right? You don't want to go to work on the fifth. You're like, that's going to be a day off. So, anyway, we hear at the Blaze Radio Network, be airing a special Monday and Tuesday, regular programming, resuming on Wednesday the 5th.

Starting with Doc Thompson and then Glenn Beck, then Michael Pelka, then Chris Halsato, then Pat and Stu, then Buck Sexton. You're that your live lineup Monday through Friday right here on the Blaze Radio Network. We have programming this weekend for you. All our shows are on, regular programming. Some will be uncore presentations.

Others will be new material. But the regularly scheduled programming is on on the Blaze Radio Network this weekend. Enjoy the special hosted by Doc Thompson, Chaos and Clarity. It would be fascinating to see, listen to how all the final three hours were put together because there was some interesting interviews from Doc and some of the hosts here on the Blaze Radio Network. We all participated in the special. I don't know how much they used.

It'll probably be, and joining us is Jeff Fisher. Thank you, Doc. And now, Mike Brubhead. Wait, I didn't even. Welcome to Chaos and Clarion. joining us on the program, Jeff Fisher. Hey, Doc, yep, uh, sure is chaotic out there. And now Mike Broomhead joins us, Mike.

And they'll have, and now Michael Pelka. Chris Salcedo joins us for three hours. So we'll, we'll see how that works out. But anyway, we're here for you. I, I myself, I put down the fist, man. I said, gosh darn it. This is a working weekend. And whether it's raining or sunshiny, wherever you're at, we're on the air, the Blaze Radio Network.

Darn it. We're here for you. And I'm looking at the television screen and they're promoting the show laughing. And I apologize for sidetracking, but they just had three segments in a row with, do you remember Tiny Tim? That was a weird cat, man. You can quote me on that. he was a weird cat I mean

forget I mean laughing was created some tremendous characters and they had a great time but Tiny Tim was a weird cat that's all I'm saying weird cat

so I see a post on the beloved Facebook had you know I get hooked into them just like you do you know you're You're scrolling through your timeline. You're reading stories about, you know, your cousin,

witness an accident. It was horrific. We got out and we helped the guy. I was just reading one this morning where a lady in my timeline talked about seeing an accident and rushing to the victim and the truck had rolled over and the truck was driving erratically and crashed. surprised and she had

her daughter call the police and the guy that dinged into the truck that tipped over was there nobody stopped to help she was out running she went to help the guy to make sure the guy was okay in the truck

he wasn't in the truck when she got there he had flown out the window he was laying on the ground in the back and he said I wasn't driving I wasn't driving So I made her think that someone else was driving the car Come to find out no one else was driving the car. He was driving the car.

He was just drunk. Wasn't me. I wasn't driving. I was riding. The person that was driving ran away. But the truck is in your name. I know. And I let that guy that I can't remember his name drive me.

Yes, sir. So you get caught up in those stories. And then you get caught up in, I see the headline, here's what kind of cold-blooded, here's what kind of cold-blooded killer you'd be based on your zodiac sign. And you think, nah. And you keep scrolling.

And then you get to the story where Misty, our pet dog of 20 years, just passed away. We've been so sad. Go ahead. Scroll back to the cold. old-blooded killer story. I mean, I love Facebook, but there's only so many.

So only so many, I'm sad, my dog died stories I can take. And I am sorry that your dog died. But, you know, I just want to find out if I would be a cold-blooded killer next to my zodiac sign. Because I personally believe I would be. All right? I believe I would be. And of course, you know, you start reading about them.

And it's kind of fascinating because you realize, ooh, this isn't me. Aries impulsive, hotheaded, prone to rash decision-making. Arians are the signs who would mistakenly kill someone to see if they could get away with it. Their downfall would be the cover-up. Taurus, they're concerned with what is fair, good and right. A torus would be a vigilante killer,

Unfor blood against those who mistreat others. Yeah. The bull hardheaded. That's me, not them. Gemini, cancer. They said, I'm an Aquarius. So, you know, Leo, who cares? A Leo would be able to keep their own horrifying secret because of their need for attention.

Huh. A Virgo. Let's be real. There's no way a Virgo would commit murder and be caught. They're far too methodical and maniacal for that. Nice. Nice. A Virgo would be the type that would commit a series of murders and leave behind clues, zodiac style, just to see if someone was smarter than them.

Eventually, they'd grow bored of killing and move on to something else. Plus, the idea that people would constantly wondering who committed their crimes to a Virgo, that's almost the best part. Libra. Scorpio. Ooh, Scorpio. I have a bunch of Scorpios in my life. Cold, cold and collected. That's no kidding.

Plus, Scorpio's man. Scorpion's got that tail, man, and they love getting back at people. This is your horoscope story here on the Blaze Radio Network. Call now and we'll give you your horoscope on your daily hoscope. Information needed. Date of birth, time of birth, place of birth. We can help you out. Scorpio.

Cold, cold, and collected. A Scorpio would be a scorpio would be. make the absolute best contract killer. Out of the 12 signs, a Scorpio would have the least trouble with disassociating their emotions and feelings and look at each kill like a job. Another plus side,

they're terrific liars and love to shroud themselves in a certain amount of mystery. Catching a Scorpio and getting a confession would be next to impossible. Making them the perfect hit man. Oof.

To myself. Because we've got Sagittarius. I've got a couple of Sagittarians too. Sagittarius would probably accidentally kill someone and then spend the next 48 hours figuring out how to cover it up. Yeah. They definitely didn't mean to do it. They probably just got carried away.

It ended up in the worst case scenario. As long as the Sagittarius could figure out how to keep their mouth shut and they'd get away with the murder. But they didn't possibly let something slip and it would all be over. Right? Capricorn. Paranoid. Expect the worst from people.

they couldn't do it. Pisces, with their hearts firmly planted on their sleeve, a Pisces is most likely to commit a crime of passion. Aquarius, me. What do you think? What do you think? Does it say I could be a serial killer? A killer?

A cold-blooded killer. Here's what kind of a cold-blooded killer you'd be based on your zodiac sign. I'm an Aquarius. What does it say? about Aquarius and yeah well we'll take a quick a quick pull of the room yes me personally cold-blooded killer yes or no yes no I got a thumbs up in the corner thumbs down no not that finger my lord don't give me I didn't mean that finger I just meant the thumb all right Aquarius if you are looking for the sign most likely to be a sinister

unemotional stereotypical serial killer look no further than an Aquarius. An Aquarius wouldn't just kill someone because they could. They would kill someone because it was fun for them. And their tendency towards being onemotional, aloof, and slightly all over the place would make them the most sinister of killers. An Aquarius would definitely make a legendary killer. But no one you'd ever want to be alone with in a room.

I mean, that pretty much sums me up. This is The Jeff Fisher Show on the Blaze Radio Network. Network. This is the Jeff Fisher Show. You know, sometimes you wonder what people think about. How are you looking? I know that I am fashion. I have said it forever.

I am fashion. I get it. I understand it. I know it. I live it, I breathe it daily. So maybe I, you know, it's easy for me to judge.

But from time to time, I look at the television screen and see someone on the screen and think, dude, Why are you wearing that? Or, honey, honey, baby, doll. No, don't wear that again. Whoever told you that looked good, lied. There's a guy on MSNBC right now that's part of the panel.

He's got the jacket on with the thing and the thing. And it just, the hair is not trimmed. He's got facial hair that hasn't really been trimmed. and he's just he's got the thing and the thing going on. It's not good. It's not good.

And I haven't seen his name pop up on who he is, but I realize that it's the 4th of July weekend. It's July 1st, and it's MSNBC, and it's the show AM Joy, I think it is. Yeah, I am Joy. And I'm sure he's a nice man. But no, honey, no. Whoever said, oh, that'll look great on TV.

No, honey. No, baby. Don't. Don't wear that like that. Don't. Okay, I love you, but don't. Because. All right, a couple fake news stories for you.

Both strong fake news stories. Amazingly strong fake news stories. And they're great stories, but there's no way they're real. They're just not. I mean, they're tremendous. The stories themselves, you think, Wow. But then they're not real.

They're just not. Texas woman who police said packed a weapon in her vagina has been sentenced to probation guilty of drug possession. Now she was arrested and she was arrested for, I think she had meth

and some other marijuana on her. And she was arrested and when she got in the back of the car, she told the police, hey, Hey! Hey! By the way, by the way,

I have a pistol in my vagina. Her vagina is her holster. There's no way that's real. Sorry, it's not real. Fake news. Good story? You want to believe it. And you want to say to yourself, yeah, I can see that happening.

No, honey. No, it's not happening. The whole thing over the Castile shooting in Minnesota, where they're saying whether you should say whether you have a gun or not, because they're pretending, you know, they're saying that, well, if he had to say that he was a concealed weapon carrier, he wouldn't have got shot. So you shouldn't have to do it.

Well, there are several states, I think nine or ten, where you must say that you have a concealed weapon. Texas is one of them, which leads me to think that you want to believe this story because it happened in Texas, right? It happened in Texas. She's in the back of the police car. She may have wanted to say something earlier.

I don't know. Maybe she couldn't sit down in the back of the police car comfortably. But she got in and said, hey, guys, officers, hey. By the way, hey. By the way, yeah, I got a gun in my vagina. Fake news. Sorry. Not real.

No way that happened. Another story. Women arrested for stinking up bathroom and closing down restaurant. Now you want to believe that. You want to believe that. I mean, I do. In Charlotte, North Carolina. They say police and fire paramedics were called to a restaurant

I'm when it had to close his doors early on Tuesday, when a woman spent 45 minutes in the bathroom causing unbearable inhuman stench. Now, you want to believe something like that. You do. That's what makes these fake news stories so good, is you want to believe it. You want to believe that quotes like I couldn't breathe,

I knew she was in there blasting. I'm not calling it that. The smell was toxic. I thought I was going to take, my son to the hospital for sulfur exposure. He was coughing and dry ratching. The woman is some kind of beast. You want to believe a story like that.

You do. You want to believe that the first responders said, I never had my 30 years on the job as have I ever seen anything so rancid. You want to believe stuff like that, but you can't. You can't. You know why?

Because it's fake news. The Jeff Fisher Show, the Blaze Radio Network. The Jeff Fisher Show. I don't know why this rejoined music, all I want to do is go 96WN. Double ECHAD. I'll take the third caller at 893. W.H. Ed. You rip me off for an hour.

He's a jimoka shake. Free lube from Harry's Auto. And an ice cream cone from McDonald's as long as the machine is working. You know, never mind. Another fake news story. Quick fake news story. Just, it's kind of on the fakeish news story because I believe, you know,

the story actually happened. I just think that it's not, the reason that it happened isn't real. The story is this, you know, all over the place saying, a couple asked internet to Photoshop out shirtless guy from engagement photo. Regrets it immediately.

Okay, so I believe that they, you know, there's actually this couple who put their picture up and asked for someone. We're having such a hard time getting rid of this guy. I just can't seem to get this guy out of our picture. So if you could help us Photoshop this guy out of our picture without cropping it down so it's our engagement photo, I believe that actually happened. Do I believe them that they couldn't do it?

No. Because you don't ask the Internet to do something like that. You don't just throw it out there saying, hey, can you, could someone help me photoshop this guy out of our picture because then what happens people are photoshopping everything into the picture everything out of the picture they're moving everybody around and you get some pretty

some are funny pictures some are sad but you're not getting what you asked for and you know that going in there's no way that someone says we're having trouble getting this guy out of our picture It's really our engagement photo, and I really want him out of the picture, and I just, you know, could someone help us on the internet? Stop it.

Stop it. Fake news. Now, this story, while hard to believe, I hope it's fake news, but I don't believe that it is. And it's got there. Good luck. All right, so a convicted child molester recently got out of prison moves in with his mother.

Okay. And, you know, there's all kinds of laws about child molest sex offenders prohibiting them from living near schools or public grounds. But there's no law that says the child molester can't move in next door

to his victim. That's where his mother lived. I want that to be fake news. In fact, I hope it's fake news, but I don't think it is. You imagine your child gets molested by some freak,

some freak by the name of Harold English. Oh, I probably shouldn't have said his name. Now it's out there. Now it's out there. Oh, no. But he's convicted of molesting this girl when she was a little girl. And now he moves in next door to her? No.

No. If that were to happen in my neck of the woods, there may be, I don't know, I may have to stash a gun somewhere in a body part and go for a walk with Mr. Child Malester. Because you're not living next door. My daughter's not seeing you every day. I am not seeing you every day.

I don't care who lives there. I don't care if you need a place to live or not. You can go live somewhere else. and since there isn't a law on the books for that be prepared for new ones to come out because it's for the children and it's also agonizing

no way no no way letting that one happen and Miley Cyrus back in the news Miley turning her life around says you know she's doing

better. She's turning her life around. She's not, she's had enough of the, the, the, the phrechoids, and she's older now. She's gone through all of this, and she wants to turn her life around. And she also said that, look, I know I was a habitual pot smoker, you know, I just, it's been a crazy time for me. And I've just kind of been a, you know, a good-natured hippie, you know. And she'd previously described herself as a pansomber. sexual free spirit posed in some head scratching weird photos some sexual device theme performances she's now though declared herself at the age of 24 as a genderless ageless no different than an animal species okay then I think I'm weird because

I feel very genderless. I feel ageless. I feel like I'm a spirit soul, not even divided by human being, or I treat the animals the same, or hopefully treat the planet with as much respect as possible. I feel very much like there's no us and them. There's no me and you. I feel like I'm kind of just, I want to be everything, and I want to also kind of nothing. I just want to be able to be myself.

It may be time for. Just to maybe go back to dad's house or maybe not go back to dad's house because dad's probably a little whacked himself. I don't know him personally, but it seems that he's been a provider for some of your craziness. Most crazy people do have a person in their lives, the enabler in their lives, that pushes them over there. It's like someone who can't move anymore and stuck in bed and 600-pound life. They all have their enablers. The people who continue to bring the 600-pound man or woman,

food! Bring me a ticket! Wait me off! Don't touch me there so hard! They all have their enablers. I think maybe, Miley, it might be time to rethink. to reset, to look back on those exhausting 24 years of your life, and think to yourself,

what can I do to be a better person? Other than I think I'm weird because I feel very genderless. I feel ageless. You know, I feel like I'm a spirit soul. I'm not even divided by human being. Treat animals the same. and treat the planet with so much respect. I'm just a genderless, speciousless, ageless being.

No, honey. No, honey. Come here, baby. Let me talk to you for a little bit. You know that you're 24 years old. You've got a lot older since your little Disney days. You know that. You're aging.

You know that baby. And you know you're a female, a human female. Right, baby? Right. So, even though you feel like you're a genderless, specious, ageless being, and, you know, I know it feels kind of weird for you to feel genderless and ageless and feel like a spirit soul. No.

Just, I feel like there's no us and them, there's no me and you. I feel like I'm kind of just I want to be everything I want to be also kind of nothing I just want to be able to be myself now some may want to say mylie you're bat crap crazy

you're out of your freaking mind what are you talking about lay off the drugs okay lay off the booze and relax others may want to rethink and just say, no, baby, come

here, let me just give you a hug and it's okay. It's okay, baby. We're not allowed to get you. It's okay. Let's just go someplace nice and relax for a little while, okay? Oh, okay. But, you know, I still feel weird

because I feel, you know, genderless, I feel ageless. I feel like I'm just a spirit's soul, not even divided by human being or treat the animal. is the same, hopefully treat the planet with as much respect as possible. You know, I feel very much like there's, well, you know, there's no us and there's no them. There's no me and you. I feel like I'm kind of just, you know, I want to be everything and I want to also be kind of nothing.

I just want to be, you know, able to be myself. If those aren't song lyrics, then no, baby doll. You need to go find a room. With some pads in it, okay, baby? School. We'll find a room. Here we go. This is the Jeff Fisher Show on the Blaze Radio Network.

This is the Jeff Fisher Show. That it is and welcome to it. Hope everybody has a great Fourth of July. I'm looking forward to, you know, the possibility of, you know, hitting the powerballs. The Fourth of July holiday weekend, I figured, hey, you know, I'll play it. I think now it's up to a little over $100 million. I realize that for most of you listening, that just bumps you into a different tax bracket.

I got it. I understand it. But, you know, the $100 million for me, I would be happy to take it. Let's see what the Powerball is here. Powerball jackpot. See if it's up over $120 million. I don't like to win.

I don't want to win anything less than $120. Powerball. Oh, what are we worth? I might have to give my ticket back if it's not worth $120 million. million. So I'm reading a story about a guy in New York who stopped at a convenience store because he needed air in his tires and while he's there, he said, ah, give me a lottery ticket.

And he wins a million bucks. Come on now. I'm supposed to be happy for him, right? I'm supposed to be happy for him because that ticks me off. I mean, all right. I'm glad you won, but that ticks me off. All right. So the power ball is $106 million.

67.7 million cash value right now if I win it. I'm taking the 67 million and I'm out. Have a nice day. Have a nice day. Good luck. I want to win. Look, you're not going to win. I remember when the Florida lottery first started and you're playing your paycheck every week for a couple of months.

And then you realize, well, that was dumb. So you're not going to win. all right you're going to win a couple bucks everybody's won a few bucks here and there you know four or five hundred dollars and you and that's what keeps you along right you win the you win the four numbers for 500 bucks and you go yes I'm still in I'm close my luck is my tide is turning no it's not you're not going to do that odds are way it gets you Jeff you can't win if you don't play I know I know I got it so hopefully by uh by Saturday, we're up, you know, up to 120 million because 106 right now.

I'm hoping for at least 70 million cash payout. It's only 67 right now. Look, you know, just say, will I take it? Sure. Will I be disappointed? Sure. But so after, you know, after tonight, I may be gone. I may be gone.

I know. Look, if I'm like the guy in New York that wins a million, You can't quit on a million. You still have to work with a million bucks. You can, you know, you pay off a couple of things. You get to property, you know, buy a couple of nice things. And then you're done. 67 million, I'm out.

Okay? So I want you to know. I'm out. I'll still post a couple of pictures on social media of me waving. You'll know exactly where I am by, oh wait, no, you won't. I mean, I may tell you where I'm at. for a little while. If I win 67 million, I'm out. I'm loving this. I love

working for the Blaze Radio Network. Love working with Glenn Beck. Love working out the Glenn Beck radio program. I love Patton's too. I can't really say I love Pan's due. And I like being here, but 67 million, I'm out. So happy 4th of July. Don't burn

your hands with sparklers. Make sure the kids are safe. You know how dangerous they are. Be careful. You know, they're really fire. Don't let him play with fire. Have a great holiday. We'll see you next week. Take care of yourself and make sure for whatever you do,

don't wear that god-offel shirt to the firework. This is the Jeff Fisher Show. Only on the Blaze Radio Network.