Chewing the Fat with Jeff Fisher - Ep 107 | USPS Delivers via Mule Train & The Top US Cities

Episode Date: May 22, 2019

Jeffy finds out the different ways USPS delivers around the US. Windsor whisperer comes back with some information. It's time again the top US cities. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We have got to do our own investigation. I think it's time for a chewing the fat investigation. I'm really baffled that almost every day a new story pops up of the dangers of plastic. Yesterday I have the story. Scientists find 414 million pieces of plastic debris on remote islands. then we have stories of scientists as they gut open a whale. They find plastic in its stomach and that's what killed the whale. So we found garbage island?

We have not found garbage island. And I think that's the deal, right? I think that we debunked garbage island. So they are now blasting us with, okay, so you don't believe in garbage island and there's no such thing. But plastic is killing us. More cities and states are banning plastic. More cities and states are saying how bad and evil plastic is. And now every story is finding something evil with plastic.

I think when we do our own investigation, we'll go into it with open eyes. If it's true, it's true. If it comes out that is true, we'll say, hey, you know what? It's right. These horrible remote islands are full of plastic. And whales are eating plastic and dying by the thousand. You know, a couple. But I think it's ridiculous.

There's no way. I'm sorry. There's just no way that we've got this much plastic showing up at this time. It's funny how that happened. Could be just me. Wait, what? I just did the study. Welcome to Chewing the Fat Investigates.

Today we investigate the horrors of plastic being found around the world. That's as much that we've got produced so far. Horrible story. Out of Illinois. Now, you know, we're big fans of zoos here at Chewing the Fat. I love zoos. I'm all about zoos. If you're able to donate to keep zoos alive, donate, and do whatever you can for them.

And we should be doing special events. zoos all over America. In Illinois, a zoo had to put down a flamingo. I know. You think to yourself, wait. Why is that a big deal? Because this is something that I would have done as a kid. Apparently there was a little kid at this Illinois zoo and he throws a rock at the

flamingo. Who knows why the kid threw the rock at the flamingo? If you've been to zoos, you see flamingos sometimes in their zoo habitat and they're not moving. And they've got their head stuck in their wings, and they're just standing there on one leg, and you're like, is it dead? Is it, are they alive?

What's going on? So I'm sure the kid was like, I can get this thing to move. And he picks up a rock and rifles it at the Flamingo. And it moved all right. It broke its leg. Right? I know.

Don't look at me like that. I didn't say I did it. I said I could see myself doing it. And this poor Flamingo. standing on one leg, then falls to the ground, beak in the dirt. One leg, not broken, but stuck inside. The other leg, broken. Now, you ain't lying, ouch, big time.

The flamingo had one leg broken. Ouch. So they can't fix it, I guess. Right? I mean, I know, it's a zoo, right? The doctors, you think they can't tape it up? They can't give them a... Did they snap off?

We see stupid videos all the time of people putting robotic legs on their dogs and cats and running around and dogs pulling around with two front legs and no back legs and they're dragging their hind in around. And we love them and they're so cute. They can't fix the flamingo. The flamingo can't hop around on one leg or give them a cane leg or something. I guess not. I guess not. So they had to put him down. Sad.

Now, the zoo said it's working with the students' family to make sure this is a learning experience, which means the kid's going to be working at the zoo shoveling animal poop for the next 10 years, which, you know, is not a bad thing. Good for him. But these are, I mean, there's plenty of flamingos. It's not like they're an indignant. I'm not saying we should put down all these flamingos, but this is a special, you know, special.

Flemings. The greater flamingos. They're found in the Middle East, Turkey, Afghanistan. Who knew? They're in West Africa, South America, throughout Europe. I mean, they're everywhere.

One flamingo drops in Illinois. We're worried about it. But I guess they're hunted. And they like their eggs and they capture their eggs for profit. Really? They're like dragon eggs? Do you get flamingo eggs?

They live up to 30 years. And some of them are, get really old. I mean, for flamingos, they're like 60 years old. So, uh, it's a sad thing. And just remember when you take the kids to the zoo, no rock throwing down. Don't be throwing rocks at the animals. I would like to know why we can't fix the flamingo legs, though.

We need to get a, we need to get a zoo dock on and tell me why a broken leg on a flamingo means you got to put it down. I get the horses. I don't know. Some horses we have to put down too with broken. broken legs, right? Animals break legs, you got to put them down. I mean, it kind of goes, humans are that way too. No, well, they put, you put yourself down, right? You break a leg as a human, you don't, you're not long. Yeah, you break a leg as a human. You're not long for the world.

So, I mean, that's where we're at now, right? Oh, did grandma break a leg? Loved her, though. We loved her. We're going to use it as a learning experience. Sad. More animal news. Well, insect bug news. So a couple heard this buzzing in their bedroom. And, you know, whenever you hear buzzing in any kind of room in your house, man, it is a problem. Unless you're the one buzzed. Thank you.

Thank you. Unless you're the one buzzed. Thank you. Me are all week. So they find, they find a bee. I have like 80,000 bees in their bedroom. amazing. I mean, it was in the wall 80,000 bees.

How does that happen? It was so big, I mean, it had to been there for a long time, right? An 80,000 beehive in a wall just doesn't happen. That builds up over time. So you've had to have seen bees flying around your house, coming in and out of a section of your house somewhere throughout the time. Don't you walk around your house once in a while and take a look? you're sitting out back and you see extra bees flying around.

You're like, how come there's so many bees flying around? You don't walk around, try to find where their hive is, something. But, you know, you're laying there at night and is that your alarm going off? Sounds like it's coming from the wall. 80,000 bees in your beehive. Okay. I mean, that's in your bedroom. Now, this is where they called people in and they got rid of it,

which is good. And they brought in their beehive relocation expert. That's a good gig right there. A beehive relocation expert. You know what my beehive relocation expert is? Where's my... You know what my beehive relocation expert is? Thank you.

With that burn the house down. Yeah, but the bees are gone too. All right, why wasn't I notified? The United States Postal Service is now going to start using semis, driverless. Now, they're not going to be driverless for a while. They're still going to have an engineer and a driver

sit back and see if it can go between Phoenix and Dallas. We're going to talk to an attorney sometime soon about what the outcome could possibly be when we have more and more companies going to automation as far as out on the roads. And I've got some thoughts on that myself. But as I'm reading this story about the, you know, the USPS and you know I'm a

I'm a fan I always wanted to be the you know I always wanted to be the head in charge of the postal service and I'm more than willing to be in charge again you know I was going to be the postmaster general and then I found out no postmaster general is just a do boy to the board so I once want to be a board member thank you thank you are you the are you the postmaster general sit down we've got we've got some duties for you to do

I said, I had a little board meeting going on. So in this story, it talks about how they deliver all their mail. All right, they move 484.8 million pieces of mail every day. Right? Although you'd think that it would be, but they lose money every year. I mean, they need me. How? They need me on the board.

How do they lose money? This is how they lose money in this story. In rural Alaska, postal workers run. hovercraft, prop planes, occasional parachute to deliver mail? What? Come on. Why is they saying near snow? They pilot boats in Louisiana, Bayou,

snowmobiles in Colorado, Minnesota, Montana, Utah, and Wisconsin. They're good snowmobiles. To reach the Havasupia, Indian Reservation, the Havasupia. We've got to see if that's right. I feel like I need to say bless you. I know. We got to make sure they're going to. We're saying that right.

We have computers on that. We have a computer? Yeah, we do. So, because we have that computer, uh, have a supia, Indian reservation. Have a soup pie.

That's darn near close. Is it? It's right there. It's right there. Have a soup pie. Have a soup. I've never had a soup pie before. Do you have ice cream with that?

The. Thank you. Those are Pidi room shots, by the way. What's that? Have a soup pie. I've never had a soup pie before. Do you have ice cream with that? Thank you.

I'm on fire today. I'm just on fire today. Have a supine. Thank you. We're burning down the house all right. So the have a supai. Have a soupie. Thank you. Indian reservation.

In the town of Supai. So the... Have a soupie. Indian reservation. The town is the... Pie. Have a supai. No, just supai.

The town isn't have a supai. Although... Pie. Although you can probably stop in for the little enough money and get yourself a supai. No, you don't... Would you like to have a supai? Cost you money. Thank you.

But, you know, it's just supai is the name of the city. Supai. Yeah, that's the name of the town. It's at the bottom of the Grand Canyon. So the Have a Indian Reservation And the town of

DuPai Is at the bottom of the Grand Canyon We deliver mail to them This is how we got here We're still talking about delivering mail I was just wondering By mule train What's a mule train

If you If you get your mail delivered By a mule train In 2,000 stop Just stop Because I've already I've already made all kinds of jokes about having a supai. And, you know, I'd like to have a supai.

So this is a mule powered by trains? Yeah, it's not how a horsepower. You know, cars run on horsepower. Yes. Yeah. These are special Grand Canyon automobiles run on mules power, mule trains. Now, they're mule. So is it a train or sort of mule?

It's a train of mules. It's like a pack of mules. Is that what it is? Oh, okay, okay. So, are you kidding me now? Here's an idea. Maybe we have the Indian people, I don't know, come up to the top of the Grand Canyon. We put their mailbox at the top of the Grand Canyon.

Can we just air drop it and just drop it? Okay. I mean, I don't even want to do that. I want to put, you know, people flip their mailboxes like at the end of their ranch. Yeah, my in-laws. Yeah. Right. So you go and you got to walk down or you got to drive down or you got to go down and pick it up.

You get a big mailbox in case a package comes and then you, you know, some days you look out and go, not today. And so you don't, I mean, maybe you travel to the post office, but they deliver to the box at the end of the road. You know what? Dear two pie town and all the all the. Have is you pie. People living in the town. Your mailbox is.

at the top of the canyon. We're delivering everything there for you. Okay. If you want to hop on a mule and ride up and get your mail, go ahead, but we're not paying for it. We're not doing it. Mules go up rocks. I thought like a sheep could go up rocks. So the mules.

Yeah. If you ride, you could take the mules down in the grand can. Have you not been to the grand. So now, I'm stopping now because I'm going to get myself angry with you because I've already covered this with you and I'm going to make myself angry again. But yeah, you do you ride mules down into the Grand Canyon. That's how you get to the bottom of people. If you're not one of the people that look over the ledge and fall,

try to take a selfie every year. And if you fall, do you land on a... Have a supie person? So I say put a big mailbox at the top. For all... You know, there can't be how big... How big is the... Two pie.

Yeah, how big is that town? Can't be that big. I mean, I don't know how many have a... Google it. You have a computer in front of you. It doesn't work. It's broken. How do you spill the town?

Well, is... It's the Havasupai Indian Reservation. It's have a, it have a soupy. It's have a Suppy Indian Reservation down there at the bottom of the canyon. Just put the mail on a mule. We'll drive it down to you. Mule train. Isn't that a, isn't that a soap too?

It used to be the Borox Mule Team used to be a soap? Never mind. I don't know. That's another. How many people? How many people? As of 2010, 639 people. Okay.

We're not paying for, no. We're not paying for mules to come down with your mail, no. And what are we sending them ads for the coals? Coles. Yeah, there's a Coles that's in Supai. Oh, that coal. Something like the actual coal. That's what they sell at Coles for the Supai Reservation.

Yeah. I mean, I'm guessing there probably isn't, that's one place in America where there isn't a Walmart. And I don't know that. Maybe there is. Maybe there is a Walmart at the bottom of the Grand Canyon. Bless their hearts. if there is. I mean, if you, if you come to the,

maybe that's why you're trying to take a selfie at the edge of the Grand Canyon because you want to get the Walmart sign in the back. Yes? By the way, they're being restricted to 518 acres and five miles wide and 12 miles long. Wow. I think my in-laws own more than that.

I got to be pissed, right? I mean, that's what they really need to mail. It's called email. Right? I don't know. Maybe the internet gets blocked in the canyon. Can't get Wi-Fi? Tell you what we'll do.

Tell you what we'll do. This will save us money. We'll put a mailbox or mailboxes up at the top of the canyon. And then we'll put a Wi-Fi tower up there for you. So you get email down at the bottom of the canyon. And then you've got to come up to the top to get your mail. So if you visit SuuPai, here's your amenities.

Cafe, post office. Okay. Yeah, they got a post office because they're mule trading the mail in. That's closing down. That's shutting down. Or the supai people can pay to have some guy ride up back and forth up and down the canyon and deliver mail. But it ain't happening from the U.S. Postal Service.

The Postal Service is delivering to your box at the top of the canyon. I mean, you're welcome. Now we're done with the postal service. We'll talk to the guy next week about the robot trucks running around. That's one window, didn't we? Yes. Congratulations to the great state of Washington as well. They became the first state to legalize human composting.

Yay! What is that? I mean, are you just asking these questions out of the blue just to, you know, like, really? Whales eat plastic? Really? I know who the Habasupai Indians are. No, so it means like dead bodies are now on the ground? Yes.

Yes. They just leave them laying there. and pretty soon they'll turn into dirt. You put them out back behind the shed with your banana peels and your food compost and all the stuff you throw away. You put them out behind the shed and you throw grandma out back there on the hill too. And sooner or later it turns out into compost and then you just, you know, you use it to fertilize the garden.

So it's just, you know, you're just rehashing everything. It's just recycling at all. It's the natural, what is that you ask? Wow. It's the natural organic method of burying human remains. to dirt, duh. This is what I said to begin with. So what they do is they mix your body with wood chips and straw.

And then in a few weeks, you're into dirt. A few weeks you've turned into dirt. Now, I'm guessing, there's just a thought. It doesn't smell that good. Maybe the wood chips and the straw soak it up a little bit. Put some essential oils? Maybe, maybe. Now you're up on the cost.

We're trying to knock the cost down. Well, that's a new idea, right? So it gives me, thank you. It gives meaning now to the use of what happens to our bodies after death, which, look, we've talked about it before. Remember last year in Dallas, they mixed the idea of liquefying the bodies, right? Homeless people. Or people, they're not only homeless, but yes, that was their big focus. But it was people who were left in the morgue.

Right. And I mean, they're spending all kinds of money on this and they're saying, look, then the school would take some of them. The University of Texas Southwest took some of the bodies for their studies. And then the other ones, like if you weigh, if you're, you know, 600 pounds. So fat. If you're similar to some people on the planet that weigh a lot, you're left there. They're not taking you.

The school's not taking you. You just left on the floor in the board. The compost area? No, it's not the floor. So, uh, they're saying, they're saying they don't want to cremate them and they, they turn them into liquids, liquefy stuff. And remember because they talked about how if they liquefy the bodies, then they could just put it in the sewer.

Yeah. And then the people could be, and then our idea was. And the bones were getting chopped up and they were getting thrown into the gardens. And then our idea was making an attraction. Thank you. Yes. The liquefied to human well. Yes. That's where we put them.

I remember like it was yesterday. Thank you. Yes. So at least in Washington, they're trying to step up the game a little bit and saying that they could use, you know, it's more environmentally friendly than cremation or burials. So that's good. And listen, recomposition gently converts human remains into soil so that we can nourish new life after we die. I mean, that's tough.

for me to argue against that. It's tough for me to argue against that. I'm sure there's plenty of people that are going to be upset about it, but good for Washington, and I hope it saves him some money. All right, let's go to the break room. I need a drink of Coca-Cola Zero Sugar,

and we have got some news that we have to talk about today. Has to happen here on chewing the fat, but I have to drink Coca-Cola Zero Sugar before I even get to it. I'll tell you that. Oh my gosh, it's so good. Okay.

I realize that this podcast went a little overboard. And I know that. We went a little overboard with our coverage of the Royal Baby Birth. And we went deep. I mean, we went deep inside the royal family to find out what was going on. Nobody else did that. No one else did it. Nobody else did it.

All right. Because we wanted you to be aware of what's going on. And we did not get censored. And we did not get censored. All of them. Because we did it right. So, and I know, and I've been backing off a little bit because the Royals, you know, wanted a little privacy and they want to be with their little baby. Oh, wait. Is that what we backed up?

Yeah. Okay. But I can't anymore. After this news happened, we've got to tell you a little bit of some more of what's going on behind the scenes at Windsor. So, we know that the queen is really not happy with Megan. She's screwed up by the, oh, okay in the wedding to Harry because she's, you know, just not the right person to be part of the royals. But the queen let Harry get what he wanted

because it's her grandson and he's had a tough life with the mom and the dad. Yeah, come on. He has horse face as a stepmother. So the, uh, uh, now we know that Charles is next in line to be king,

but Charles is in the 70s. He's not going to last. I mean, I'm guessing. And Queen Elizabeth probably figures she's going to live longer than Charles. I think so. All right. And we also talked about, even if that doesn't happen, if the queen dies and Charles becomes king,

as soon as he becomes king, he should then say, hey, I finally made it to being a king. But I need to give it to my son who's going to rule longer and let him be king, and I'm going to step down. I'm going to retire. So no problem. because Harry's not going to be king. Megan's not going to be queen, right? It's Kate. Kate's not going to be queen, all right?

William's going to be king, but Kate's not going to be queen. That's not going to be your title. She can't be. She can't be. Well, I know, but she can't be. So at some point, William's going to be king, whether he has to wait for grandma and dad to die, but that will happen before he dies.

Absolutely. Unless something horrific happens, no problem. which that's not going to have which he'll go to his son he'll go to William's son right so now Kate has been

gradually getting all this stuff we've told you little stuff that the queen has been given her let her do let her wear this she could wear anything that the queen because Megan asked about it she gets her hand slapped no no no it's right

we know that from the Windsor Whisperer that we have we know that for a fact right I mean we we know that Hey, Grandma, can I... No, not touchy, not touchy. So, now we get this news that Kate has been given

some more stuff from the Queen. All right, go ahead. The headline is, Queen Elizabeth II just gave Kate Middleton Dame Grand Cross Exignia. Here's what that means. Okay. Queen Elizabeth II made

Catherine Duchess of Cambridge, a Dame Grand Cross of the Royal Victorian Order, which is the highest title of its kind. Nice. This, you want to talk about just another way to slap Megan down a little bit. Look, she's not going to be queen, but she's going to have all of this. All right, and her hubby's going to be king. I mean, I know you're in love with Harry and everything, and I probably shouldn't let you marry him, but he's never going to be king, all right?

so now this title comes with some perks that Megan is going to be so pissed they get their own church they get their own hotel church like it's barely you're inside of the circle amazing

Sal it now William and Kate gets to go to the little separate church yes the chapel yes and can Harry gets to go right Eric Kegu, because he's part of the Knight's order. So he's part of her, you know, Royal York.

Yeah, because Harry's going to be. You can't not carry out. I mean, he's in charge of the knights. He's still the grandson. I mean, he's still the guy. But she can't go, though. But Megan can't go. Ow!

That hurts, man. Ouch. You aren't lying. Listen, I got my grandma called and wants me to run over. I got to run over. I got to meet them at the chapel before we go out tonight. I mean, do you want to wait outside while I'm inside? You want to wait?

No, no, no, I want to go inside. Yeah, I mean, I can leave you. I can leave you in the carriage with the workers if you want to. I mean, you can't come in. No, but I want to go inside. Yeah, no. Kay can go inside. It's just going to be, it's just going to be us.

Yeah, but Kay can go. I know. It's just going to be us. So it's going to be grandma, grandpa, grandpa, Kate, William, me. That's it. You know, and their kids and stuff. You can just watch the kid out back until I get it, until I get done. I mean amazing.

Right? This is a serious slap in her face hard. The queen, man, she's not messing around. We'll be inside with the Windsor Wins. I can't even say it right. We'll be inside with the Windsor Whisperer at another time on chewing the fat. You know, every summer, Mercury 1

in collaboration with wall builders. You may know wall builders, you know, David Barton, opens the doors for emerging leaders for its leadership training program. And it is, it's really amazing. It's an LTP program, life changing for these kids. LTP. I don't like that. That's you and me, bro.

LTP. And you know me. LTP. And you know me. It will literally change the way you think and the way that you act. You, one of the days mean you're speaking. Of course we are. Why would I?

I mean, that's on my schedule already. Yeah, it should be on your schedule. I confirmed it with them. You did? Yes. Me and you will be speaking. I mean, I know Pat, Stu and I have gone over there and talked a couple times.

We've had a lot of fun with them. Yes. Now I've got, I'm stuck with you. Yes. Well, my partner is no longer here, so it's me and you. Your partner, does she leave you? I thought you got married.

No, I'm talking about Doc Thompson. I used to do it with Doc. So now it's me and you. Oh, nobody can replace Doc. Apply to join this elite group of students for, Mercury 1's LTP. You know me. Now taking applications.

Spots are limited. It's only offered once a year for ages 18 to 25. I actually would, I actually, I'm just reading what it says here on their little commercial thing. I need to talk to them because I thought it was two sessions. I thought it was two sessions. It's two sessions a year. Originally I thought it was two, two, two, two, two. Do you remember there used to be a radio show out of Miami, Florida.

Here we go. We just forgot. Rick and Suds. And they used to have this bit about two-two. And Tutu was Rick's dog. Rick, from Rick and Suds, it was his dog. But it was all kinds of, the joke was Tutu, what kind of name is that for a dog? And people would call.

There was one guy that used to call all the time and he was set up this whole long story on the radio show. And I'm sure it was, you know, already set up to do it. It wasn't for real. But it was hilarious because the guy would call and he would talk about the military or whatever it was. And he'd go to this long story. and then he would say the end of the story would be, you know, and then they used to name the Jeep that they had of the military,

Tutu! Tutu, what kind of name is that for a dog? And that would be the... They had Rick and Suds. That was a pretty funny show. Are there's too long? Afternoons on WIOD. I don't think so.

I don't think so. I saw one of your friends passed away from WFLA. No, WDAE. Oh, WDHA. Yeah. I saw, well, I saw WFAA that tweeted, right? Yes. Yes.

Yeah. Steve Dumbig, the big dog. I do Steve. Steve and I worked together at the first sports station in the country, really, out of Tampa, WFNS 9-10. How many years ago? A couple hundred. That's what I said.

It was 100 years ago. Sports is being known for a while. And then we worked together. And then he came over to WDAE. I was, when DAA first started, I was working for another company and then I came on to work with J.Core and whatever. I worked with Steve along, too. We were the same building working together for a year.

I love Steve. He and I had a really, really good relationship. Very sad to see that he passed away. And that's Mercury1.org slash LTP. You could get more stories like that from Jeff Fisher because he'll be one of the speaker. That's Mercury1.org slash LTP. Speaking of Florida, I was very happy to see that five Florida cities are on among the top most affordable downtowns to live in the U.S.

Now, the cities in Florida, Melbourne, Florida. Well, I like Melbourne. I really like Melbourne. Number six on the list of the top down downs to live. What's that? You said five. Why are we going number six? No, I said five Florida cities are among the most affordable downtowns to live in the U.S.

not a top five. The list, there was, the list is actually 30. I don't know how many cities. Downtowns. Ooh, nice. Florida got five of the 30.

Nice. And not number six. Melbourne came in at number six. On the list, okay? Of the top downtowns. Ocala, Florida came in at number 10. Retirement city. Yeah, there's a lot of horses too.

Yeah, that's what I'm saying. Retirement. That's good. Plus they've got a, Yes, they do. They've got a water park there? They do, I know. We talked about it in the show.

I was at that water park once in my life. My friend used to live outside of Ocala. And this particular water park is a water park that I've seen. I saw more man breasts at this water park than I've ever seen my entire life anywhere else. It was a fascinating day at the Ocala Waterpark. coming in at number 11 on the list of 30. Wait, what happened to 5.321? No, I'm not doing it that.

I'm telling you the five Florida cities on the list. Then we're going to go to the top 30. I'll tell you the other cities. These are the Florida cities. Okay, sorry. Because I'm thinking... These are the top five Florida cities. Okay.

I get it. Cheesh. Calm down. Bradenton, Florida. Where is that? This number 11th. Just south of Tampa on the west coast. Tampa, Sarasota, Brayton area.

It's right there on the west coast of Florida. Coming in at 19 on the list of 30, but still in the top five of Florida cities in the top 30. Orlando, downtown. I know. I know. I know. What are the qualifications for this?

Median home price, $350,000. I'm sorry? Median home prices are $350,000. in downtown Orlando. Wow. In the city limits. Median rent is $1,600. That's not bad.

Cost of utilities, $131 a month. Monthly public transportation, $50. Really? I find that hard to believe. I mean, maybe if you want to wait around in a hundred-degree weather for a bus to show up, you might get away with $50 a month. Because Uber will take you more than $50. And West Palm Beach, Florida.

I like West Palm Beach. It was number 20. 21 out of the 30 in Florida. Weird that was Palm Beach is on the east side of Florida. Yeah. It's very weird. And well, so is Melbourne. Malborn.

Elbowern. Ocala's in the middle. Yeah. And Orlando's in the middle. Yeah. That's weird how they do that. The top 30, though, most affordable downtowns in the country. Number 30, I'm not going to do all of them. Really?

I was going to say. I'm not going to go. I'm not going to do all of them. No, I just want to let you know the top of the back of the list. Oh, okay. Got it. Number 30. Peoria, Arizona.

And man, when you think of a city you want to live in the downtown? Yeah, Peora. Peoria. Peoria. That's what I said. Yeah, and that's what I said. Arizona.

I mean, that's the first city that pops up here by. Absolutely. You think, man, you know, that's where we should move. That's what we should move. Just vacation. Then you have one in Richmond, Virginia, Chandler, Arizona. Maybe I will do all three. Colorado Springs, San Antonio, Milwaukee.

No, thank you. Durham, North Carolina, Fort Collins, Colorado, Memphis, Tennessee, West Palm Beach, Southwest, Las Vegas, Orlando, Huntsville, Alabama. No, thank you. No. I mean, Alabama, I will say. Alabama is prettier than you think.

Is that where you take the last train? No. No, the last train takes you to Clarksville. And that's not in Alabama. But the last time I was in Alabama, well, that I stayed. I mean, I've cut through Alabama a few times. But when I stayed there, my son was being recruited.

So that was 100 years ago. He was being recruited by Auburn University. And we stayed outside of Auburn in, What's the damn city that Auburn University is in? Auburn? No. It is Auburn, but the city that is in is something else. Opalaca.

It's Opelika, Opalaca, something like that, Alabama. And Opelika. Anyway, best outback steakhouse in the country. Of course. Of course. Best outback steakhouse in the country. Just let you know. Downtown Houston is on the list?

Where? Where? Stop it. One number. 17th. Oh. No. No. I'm sorry. Tulsa, Oklahoma.

No. Ashville, North Carolina should be higher. 15. I could live. Downtown Asheville is beautiful. What is it? Ashville, North Carolina. I love the Carolina.

Asheville is gorgeous. I could live there. I like South Carolina better than North. That North Carolina. Asheville is gorgeous. I spent some time there. It's really pretty. Raleigh, North Carolina.

Columbia, South Carolina. Columbia, South Carolina. No, thank you. No, it's hot. It's hot. And hot and they have the biggest cockroaches in the country. I know. We talked about it.

Yes. What I said, the hotel had a cockroach crawl across me in Columbia, South Carolina. No, thank you. Yeah, thank you. And it's a dead puppy now. I'll tell you that. Well, you killed the puppy. Eugene Oregon.

No, that's Eugene. On the East Coast, no, it's cold, it's wintery. West Coast? No. Not East Coast, West Coast, West Coast. Yeah, yeah. Brains in Florida, yeah, Ocala. Yeah.

Little Rock, Arkansas. Yeah. Arkansas is pretty, but The only pretty parts is where you could get the bath houses. That's the only pretty part. And I've been to them. Modesto, California, no thank you. Des Moines, Iowa.

No, thank you. It was Steve Duce write this. Dase. What did I call him? He's not Steve Duce. Steve Dase. He write this. Yeah, he did.

Isn't that where he lives? Yeah, he does. What number is he? Seventh. Whoa. Too high. Too high. No, thank you.

Maybe 30. Melbourne, Florida. Sioux Falls, South Dakota. No, thank you. Do they not know that it's cold in these places? No, thank you. A median home price for $147,000 in Sioux Falls. I'll tell you what, I'll give you $40,000.

Well, that's why it's so cheap because nobody wants to live there. 147 ain't cheap enough for Sioux Falls. Albuquerque, New Mexico, I mean, that's a lot of meth town. Winston-Salem, North Carolina. Yes. Grand Junction, Colorado. Cold. Number one.

Here we go. Downtown. Here we go. Hit me. the cities that are the most affordable downtowns to live in and across the United States of America. Oh my gosh. Just say it. Number one on the list of 30.

Billings, Montana. Where's that? No, seriously, like, I thought it was going to be more, like, more vivid. I feel like I got cheaped. I don't know if you got jeeped. but, I mean, some people may have to think they got jipped. But Billings, Montana, number one. Wow.

Give me the numbers. Median home price, $208,450. Median rent, $1,040. Monthly cost of utilities, $127.51. Cost of monthly public transportation pass, $28. Yeah, because Billings is, where are you going? Code ranks number one a list of affordable downtowns. The town itself is often looked at the gateway

to both the Little Big Horn Battlefield National Monument at Yellowstone Park. After being founded in 1882, the city acquired the nickname Magic City, due to its incredible growth. For residents and visitors alike, the magic continues to the present day with rustic charm, scenic beauty, and plenty of outdoor activities.

activities for about three days a year. Then the rest of the year, you're frozen or you're inside your home with the heat on. The population is only 109,000. Yes. I mean, that's a good-sized town, but I mean, that's the same as South Bend, Indiana. We've got a guy running for president from there. Who? Pete Buttigig.

Oh, Putty Judge. Yeah. I'm sorry. Did I go political there for a second? No, we're done. Number one city. You just said it. Billings, Montana, man.

And you notice it's not the mean streets. It's not the mean streets where Pat Gray is from. No way. That's not an affordable downtown. Most affordable. The best city is Billings, we are hurting in the United States of Billings, Montana. Is the most affordable downtown to live?

Is that what Deadwood happened? Wow. No, Deadwood was up in the Dakota's, right? I think it was Montana. Hey. Hey. South Dakota, sorry. What did I say?

Montana. What did I say? Yeah, you said Montana. Oh, that's what I thought. Oh.