Chewing the Fat with Jeff Fisher - Ep 193 | Save My Ink Forever, I am Walt Disney, & Fat Bombs | Guest: Brad Meltzer

Episode Date: September 9, 2019

Do you want to save your ink? Listen to this awesome story about how to save your ink forever. Then Jeffy and Kris have a great idea about how to preserve history. Surprise guest visited Jeffy today to talk about his two new books "I am Walk Disney" and "I am Marie Curie". Mandy calls the CTF Hotline and leaves a LONNNNG voicemail.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

And now, a Blaze Media podcast. The title of this particular story is greatest ever shredding company slogan. And you know what? That headline is correct. The shredding company is Allegheny Shredders. Their logo is the shredding industry icon since 1967. I'm not aware of Allegheny Shredders, but if they're the Shredding industry. industry icon since 1967, good for them.

But their slogan, greatest ever. The future is here and everything needs to be destroyed. Yes, why are they not a sponsor on this program? Good to see you. You look great, by the way. I mean, I don't know if anybody's told you that today, but you do. You look great. And whoever picked out that shirt that you're wearing or blouse,

go with what they pick out in the future because you look fantastic. And remember, age is just a number. Age is just a number. And I give you a couple of stories to remind us all of age is just a number. woman 73 years old just gave birth to twins

that's a little frightening start having seven I could see the 73 year old males having uh you know becoming a father but a mother at 73 that's a little troubling did we just

this is a side note to the podcast There's something on fire in the other room? Why? Because I just saw like this giant light spark thing. Yeah. And you sound weird. And, oh, look, there's a flame coming up from the board. Maybe that's why I sound weird.

I mean, are we okay? Are you all right? I think we're fine. Yeah, I think we're fine. Is there any? I don't know. I don't hear that. You look more like in, in, in, in,

than I do with a mood and light that you got going on. I know. I like it. Oh, you do, yes. You look good. You do look good there. Thank you. The darker, the better for me.

We all know that. Also, another story that will get you age is just a number. 82-year-old man. Busted for burglary. He lived in Florida. The holidays would come around. He'd drive up to New York City. Sneak into the high rises of hoity-to-to-o-dy apartments.

break in, steal their jewelry, go back to Florida, hawk their jewelry, live for a while. That is the way to retire. I accept that he got busted, and now he can't do it anymore. Mw, mop, wah, wah, ma'am. He got busted because he'd go, he'd talk his way past the security guards

of these buildings. And so, he was, he went into one building, and he said, I'm here for, I'm here for, I forget what name he used. Gosh darned darned, what name did he use for the buildings? I'm here for Bill's apartment.

And the security guard was like, there's no bill here. Check the list again. No, no. I'm a cousin to Bill. I'm a cousin to Bill. I've got to get in. And so then said, no, no, no, nobody's here.

Nobody lives here by Bill. And so then the security guard calls the cops. What kind of mean security guard is that? You've already kicked him out of your building. You've called the police for. Is he trespassing? No. So next.

Right. He said, tried, he forgot it was a different, wrong building. I'm sorry. My cousin Bill lives in another one. Wrong building.

Wrong building. He said he would walk into the buildings and then get his way into the building. And he just walk around. And if there were, which is, I mean, he said if there was, you know,

backed up mail or stuff like that, you could tell when people weren't home. But I thought people had like separate mailboxes in those apartment buildings. So there's not mail sitting outside your door. You know what I mean? being delivered. Newspapers aren't being delivered. Yeah, don't they have the, yeah, they do.

There's that stuff being delivered to your apartment and sitting out in front of the door, right? No, yes. Right. Yes, yes, yes, yes. So I'm not, so maybe he's not breaking into high, the high end places aren't quite as high end as he thought. No, he's not going to the Trump Tower. No.

I'm leaving stuff at Trump Tower. Perhaps maybe he ought to stop going to the government buildings. But he's still walking away with jewelry. and he was dubbed the holiday burglar. I mean, they knew they were looking for somebody. But it just seems kind of strange. You're always looking for somebody. Don't give me that.

Don't give me that. Because if you're looking, you're going to find it. Just like when you look through husbands or a wife's text message, you're going to find something you're not going to like. Not on my phone. I promise you that. I don't know what you're talking about, Chris. There's four people in this room.

And out of there's four people in the room, your phone is the one that is most guilty. So don't give me that. No, it is not, Chris. And it isn't right now either because I don't know. Why are you locking it? Why are you locking it? I'll be deleting a couple of things right now.

I'll tell you that. There's a new trend happening in around the world. And I kind of get it. But it sounds on the surface a little creepy. So when someone passes away, you either bury them. You put them in, you get the coffin, you bury them, and you're done with it, put the headstone, and you go and visit them at the cemetery.

Or you get the body turned into dust, and you put it in a little container, and you carry it home, and you keep it on the shelf, and you're able to have that person with you at all times, or you turn some of their body into jewelry so that you can carry it with you at all times, right? and he's okay you know that person is with you at all times and we've we've become accustomed to those two different ways of remembering the people who have passed away well now people are and if you notice if you watch i watched i watched uh what show was i watched on the other day shoot and everybody had a tattoo they were show maybe it was just maybe it's just a football game No, I mean, I've seen ink

And my wife watches that from time and time I love ink. She's a big ink fan Both the show and in real life And she just got a tattoo like what, two months ago? She's got a new one It covered up an old one that I screwed up actually What do you mean that you screwed up?

Yeah, well you know, apparently You know Things aren't right Wow No we she There was Actually I forget what it was it was some sort of

medical patch that she had to wear at some point on her shoulders and I put it over the one tattoo that she had and it ate it up. Oh wow. She was so mad at me for putting it. Don't worry about it. It's a tattoo. It's not going anywhere.

It's fine. Put an aloe on it. Wrong. Wrong. Don't scratch it. Just put alo. Let's put some alo on it. Be done. Hello? Was it alo? Allo. My mother always called it a low.

I like that better than alo. So I just, I just call it a low. Yeah, I like that. But I believe it's alo. But I like a low. Okay. Hello. Everybody knows what you're talking about.

True. All right. Everybody knows it's fine. It's like my mother always called pedestrians, pedestrians. And I can't. You don't you see the sign pedestrian crossing? Pedestrines. Anyway.

So back to the new trend that's happening to our deceased. Have you said it yet? No. Okay, okay, cool. I thought I missed it. No. People, and so that's what brought me to, I was watching television the other day, and everybody had a tattoo.

I mean, it was a sporting event or something, and it was a big sporting weekend. We'll get to that, too. I mean, there was some great stuff that happened sports-wise over the weekend. Boo. But everyone, they showed the crowd, you know, you saw people clapping or whatever, and everybody's got a tattoo here. there, right? I mean, it's a huge thing. So now what people are doing is people are having the flesh, like if you have a tattoo that was a really cool tattoo and that's one, that's one, that's one, a

tattoo that's your tattoo, right? The mortician, or what did you call it last week? What's a mortician? No, no, you called, you called us something last week. Well, we're talking about a cemetery. Yeah, that's a cemetery. Yes. A cemetery. Yes. Mortician are the cemeterians. I think you have to be a cemetery to actually do this to pull this one off. Oh, okay, okay.

Yeah, but you, you, you take the, it's called a save my ink forever. Okay. And you, uh, you cut it off. And they save your ink. Your ink lives. Where? We're in a case.

Oh, so this is like when you cut off your ding-dong, when you're going from male to female, and to put it on a case? I don't know that they have saved my ding-dong forever, although a million-dollar idea. If they don't, they do right now. I think they do have a save-my-ding-doller. I'm sure they do.

I was sad. I'm sure they. If they don't, what is wrong with you? Have you seen the procedure? How is done? Yes. It's fascinating. It shows why I would want to do that.

I don't know. Oh, that is way too much. cutting and slicing. No, thank you. No, thank you. Either way. Yeah, either way. Yeah, either way, yeah.

Either way, yeah. Either adedectomy or take a dick away from me procedures. Yeah. I don't think it's called. Removing the ding-dong. I don't know what that procedure is called. Removing the dynchomy. Yeah, I like that one.

But like when you look at that, I'm like, why you're, no, don't slice there. That is not supposed to go there. And they go through, oh, it's fascinating. That's not the word I would use. Anyway, the save my ink forever. So they cut the tattoo off. Okay. Off with the skin.

The humans, yeah. How long, they've got to do, there's got to be some sort of chemical to keep it alive. Right. That's what I'm saying. Like, word do they're putting it. Are they put in the same place that they put the head of Disney and the head of Tim Cook? It's some kind of glass container.

that has the tattoo in it that you remember. Ooh, that's kind of cool. What is it? Oh, that's my grandfather's tattoo from World War II. It started as a guideline, you know, cutting the grass with a lot more, not just a blob, like a ghost. But it preserves it.

It doesn't say how they preserve it. It's a pretty cool idea, though. They just said they put it in a frame. With so many tattoos in the world. Heck yeah. Yeah, and it's like the Jew people when they, you know, they saved the little circumcision thing. I remember from the documentary Meet the Fuckers.

Great movie. And there's one part of the scene where, you know, Robert De Niro is about to fondue the little circumcision extra foreskin. Yeah, just like that. Hey, you okay? Nope, it's just like that. Yeah, you are just like that. Did I hit it on the head? Oh, you hit it right.

on the head. You know, Chris Cruz, that's actually a really good idea. When you were speaking of the circumcision? The Jew people.

Yeah, the circumcision. But what they really should do, and we were talking about this off the air, and really that's a really good idea. I think it's a good idea, yes. Is that with so few left of the Holocaust survivors,

there's, you know, the Holocaust survivor, wouldn't, as strange as it seems to say it, but it does seem like the people who were stamped numbers from the Nazis

and there were plenty, even around the world, but there were plenty here in the U.S. after the war who still, I mean, my father-in-law talks about people he grew, you know, dealt, did business with that had the tattoo. That too, yeah. I never seen one.

Have you seen one? Not in real life. No. I've seen them in pictures and yes. But what we were saying is that Save My Eng Forever should do that for the Holocaust survivors and preserve that. Yeah. And then give it to the museum. For the families or the museums.

I said it's for real. It'll be much better for museum. Well, you're not going to be able to. I mean, maybe. Well, they know how to preserve stuff like that. I understand that, but you've got to be able to, you have to okay that through the family. Yes, of course. Yes, I'm not going out there and be like, you know.

And we're taking your dad's number. Yeah. No, no, no, no, of course. But I feel like if you see, if save my. That's a really good idea. They should do that. They should sit down with their families and be like, hey, we want to do this. Yes.

Because, you know, remember. What's this slogan to remember? Never forget. You know, they never forget. That is a perfect way to honor those, you know, the survivors. Save my ink for. We should contact save my ink forever. And then you go go.

both ways you probably still have Nazis you could go the other way too you probably have Nazis that still have their tattoos when they were a Nazi you preserve that too as history not the new guys that are you did like the skinheads not those people I'm talking about like the real Nazis that are probably still alive if there are there's I don't know how many of those are still alive but there are some you know dragged one out of an apartment in New York not long ago yes they did and they deport him I bet you he's got one Yeah, and I say, again, whole history, preserve history.

Preserve history. Let's try to get a hold of Save Myank forever and talk to them about that. That's a really good idea. That I thought of it. Thanks for it. All right, let's go to the break room. I need a drink of Coca-Cola Zero Sugar anyway.

Desperately, it's Monday. Well, well, well, look who's in the break room today. Is that Brad Meltzer? So, you think of fiction, you think of nonfiction, you think of kids' books, you think of comics, you think of television, you think of books to TV. Who do you think of? None other than Brad Meltzer. Brad Meltzer, joining us in the break room here on Chewing the Fat Today.

Hello, Brad. How are you, my friend? So good to hear your voice. This makes me happy. Aw. So I go down that list, and the only thing I don't mention is movies. What's happening with you? I mean, I know we're hawking the new books.

I got it. We'll get to the new books. But what's up with the movies now? Go on. You got to make something happen for me. If you can help me crack it, brother, I'm in. You got to crack it. I got the television we got.

We got a new TV show coming. We got the books. But movies are just, you know, unless it's got a cape and underwear on the outside of your pants and it's a superhero, it is just hard to make a movie these days. I mean, think of it. Like, you know, I read all these thrillers, the escape artists, all these others. When was the last time you saw a John Grisham movie? when was the last time you saw any of those movies that you used to see all the time.

That's true. They just don't make them anymore in that way that they used to. Well, that's disappointing. We've got to make that happen. Yeah, no, no. If you just have $80 million, we can make one. You're the man with the $8 million. Don't get me started on that.

Right, right, right. Mr. World Traveler. Mr. All Over the World. You're the man that's got that. Let's make that happen. Let's deep pocket you. Yeah, right. All right.

So we'll get back to that. But I know that right now, coming out Tuesday, September 10th, 2019, you have two more to add to your list of children's books hitting the shelves. And I know you're excited. And they are what? Yeah. So we are doing, you know, we've done, and you and I've spoken at length, we did I'm Amelia Earhart. We did I'm Abraham Lincoln. All the idea being to give our kids rather than lessons of fame.

but lessons of character, showing them real American heroes with this biography series. We are now doing, my brother, the number one requested hero we get. It is I am Walt Disney, and along with him, I am Marie Curie. So two books coming out at the same time, and we finally get to unleash those on the universe in the I.M. series. That is fantastic. Now, these are what, the 18th and 19th of your series? Amazing.

I know, it's crazy. I mean, listen, the goal was always the same, was we wanted people to be able to to give real American heroes for their family to look up to, for their kids to look up to. And I love that parents have used our books to build libraries of real heroes for their kids, their grandkids, their nieces, and their nephews. And they've done it with, I am Jackie Robinson. I am Rosa Parks. I am George Washington is one of my favorite ones we've done.

And I love that, you know, even since it's been out, we still sell that book over and over and over again. And now with 18 and 19 in this series, you really can build a library. Yeah. And here's an idea for you to get closer to the 8. million dollars all right just off the top of my head when you when you release the 20th put them all in one little box and you sign everyone you just sell them all again just the box right and you know the funny thing is is you know amazon sells all the books it's great like i'm like why don't you make a giant box set why not buy them all like why not exactly i mean i want to do

something where we just like let people subscribe and you get one a month and whatever you get it we get two a month um but trust me if you if you can crack why you know you know publishers don't listen to their authors. Let me know. So now the last time we talked, you were working on, and I honestly, I don't remember if it was on or off the year, but you were working on getting the show ready to go for PBS. Now that's done in final, right? They're working on that, right? It's happening. That comes in November. We're doing, it's called Xavier Riddle in the Secret Museum. They're taking our series, the ordinary people change the world series, the IAM series,

and they're making a TV show out of it. And so it's about a, young boy named Xavier. He has a sister. And they have a best friend named Brad, the most handsome cartoon character you've ever seen. And they have a secret museum. When they have a problem in their lives, like they're being bullied, they go to their secret museum, they go back in time, they meet Rosa Parks. Rosa Parks teaches them how to deal with bullies. They come to the present, and boom, they deal with the bully. And every episode is a different historical hero like the ones we've done in the I.M. books. And it's crazy to watch because, listen, I love when we're doing I am Walt Disney, you know, we just talk about like why he's so awesome, right? But to be able to watch

a character named Brad that looks exactly like me meet up with everyone from, you know, George Washington to Abraham Lincoln to Winston Churchill to Amelia Earhart is just so humbling and crazy. And we debut November 11th, 50 years and one day after Cesson. Simmy Street first premiered, so no pressure on us. No, no, no, you're fine, no problem. Now, do you voice you? No, they want real, they want, no, we want to act, you want actors. You don't want dummies like me who just, you know, I can tell a story, but I can't

act, and you want these kids to be adorable, and I'm far from adorable. Oh, no, no, my friend. No, that's disappointing. You should have made that happen. Who is your manager? We've got to change this. The thing is, you know, the funny part was when we were doing the casting, I said to them, I said,

I said, do you want kids to be the voices or you want adults to be the voice? And I was like, well, our dialogue will be so witty and amazing. Only an adult can handle what we do and handle the comedy. We want it to be like, we wanted to be like Charlie Brown was, and they're like, dummy. Charlie Brown was all kids. I'm like, I meant we want all kids. So, quickly, they realized very early on, do not have me as one of these voices. that's really great

I'm excited for it I can't wait to see it it's really exciting now you're getting uh you know I read down this uh you know your publicist sends me you know the new update on you know the Brad Meltzer when I when you start hawking your wares every time and I see that you're being

honored all over the place I see your pictures traveling the world I mean what's happening you gotta be you're living the dream I trust me I feel blessed every single day, every day for what we've been lucky enough to have. You know, we're doing, I've been honored as a changemaker for Save the Children. In fact, when you pre-order a copy, if you order right now a copy of I am Walt Disney or I am Marie Curie,

the publisher, Penguin Books, will actually make a donation of another copy to Save the Children, which gives books to kids that need them all around the world. So you buy a book right now and literally a book gets donated to a needy kid. And that's incredible to me. So I love the fact that Save the Children is going to be part. You know, we'll call it ordinary people Save the Children is what we get to call it now. But it's an amazing thing. So if you're thinking about buying it, Walt Disney, you're thinking about it,

and Murray Curry, go buy it right now because you actually, your book is actually becomes two books immediately and gets donated, which I love. That's fantastic. I love that. So you're also involved in bringing a museum to this neck of the woods. Does that still going on? So, yeah. I didn't even know you knew that. Yeah.

So I'm a board member. Are we able to talk about that? Okay. We're able to talk about that. Yeah, no, we can definitely talk about it. Yeah, so I'm a board member on the middle of honor museum. And I've been on there for a while now. And the goal is to build an actual museum somewhere in America, where it down to

two cities. One is Arlington, Texas, near and dear and dear right by you. Yeah. And one is in Denver, and there are a site that's going on right now and meetings being held right now. And there'll be a big vote. I think it's in the beginning of October is the actual vote and all the board members were all going to be together and figuring this out. And obviously the goal is to honor these amazing heroes who win the Medal of Honor. And it's been really, you know, again, I, I can, you know, write these books and celebrate me and say me, me, me, but if you're not giving back to your community, if you're not honoring real heroes who are around you, what are you doing? And so that's been just a really vital part. And obviously, having been to Arlington many times,

many of them to see you when I come to Dallas. Yeah, it's beautiful. It's, you know, it's amazing of all the places we got down to that it's, you know, these two places that I adore. Yeah, and look, and let's be honest, Brad, Denver sucks. Okay, so it's just keep right here. df w i mean i just being honest that's basically what you want to present to the board right that's what that's you know so we brought in jeffy who's going to tell you his real high-solutant answer and that's what you're going to blurt out thank you we can vote now we're done um so what do you what else are you doing i am well disney you've got i am rickory which you know you're putting those out and you know you can pre-order now and obviously help out the uh save the children foundation uh or you can you know wait

tell September 10th and buy it from the bookstore and have it delivered to your house. But now's the time to, you know, pre-order it. And so, you know, what's the next novel? What are you working on? Are you just sitting around doing nothing? No, I'm working on the sequel to the escape artist. And you and you and I, last time I saw you, we were talking about the secret plot that killed George Washington. Yeah, right, right.

A non-fiction book for adults called The First Conspiracy. Which was tremendous. We're working on another book in that series. and you will hopefully see that very, very soon. Wow, that's great. So what else? You're doing any television, any radio? What are you doing?

So the TV show, the next TV show, as you heard, is the cartoon show. And then we are constantly talking to different people about doing different things. We obviously talk to the History channel because people know me from Decoded and Long History. And we love doing that. But I think, you know, once these books come out and once the next book comes out and the next book comes out, I need a nap. All right, fine. I'll let you off the hook then. It sounds like you're actually working a little bit now and then.

Brad Meltzer. Yeah, Brad Meltzer. The new books, I am Walt Disney and I am Marie Curie. Of course, the 18th and 19th books in the series. Amazing on the children's book and trying to put something else together. If you're listening to this chewing the fat with Brad Meltzer and you are part of the Hollywood crowd, there are novels that he has created that would be great for movies.

I don't know what you're doing. I don't know why you're not helping my man out, but make it happen. There, I sold it for you, Brad. You're done. That's it. I'm done. The success story has happened. I love you.

Listen, let me say the one thing that I always need to say to you, which is, you know, I know you a long time now. And I started with thrillers. And you supported those. And I started with the kids books. And you said, I'll support those. And we did the nonfiction adult books.

I'll support those. Now we're talking cartoons. I just want to thank you. It's easy to clap when everyone's clapping. But you were one of the first. And Glenn, obviously. of the dear place in my heart. So thank you for whatever the genre is,

always being there and always cheering us on. Oh, you're the man. I love you. Brad Meltzer, and, of course, you can get all the information on Brad from Bradmelzer.com. Thanks, Brad. Okay, thanks so much. You are listening to Chewing the Fat with yours truly, Jeff Fisher, on the Blaze Podcast Network.

Thank you so much for coming along for the ride today. Remember, if you're not already a subscriber, to chewing the fat with Jeff Fisher, my first question to you is, what are you doing with your life? What's your problem? They're losers. No, they're not.

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Well, yeah, then you're not a loser. If you're a first-time listener, you're still a loser but you're loser with with hope in the future to become a winner and it's a very easy step to become a winner

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subscribe on Apple or iTunes, you can rate and review the podcast. Double winners. Those are the double winners. You guys are like professionals. Yeah, there are. Clearly. So when you rate and review it, look, I know you have busy lives.

And if you, and I look. Do they have busy lives? They have busy lives. They have a lot of things going on. So I've made it easy for them. They just rate and review it. 20 stars, best podcast ever. That is easy.

Yes. And you're done. You've moved on with your life. You're all, you know what? Winner, winner. Chicken dinner. How can you, you can't even, you can't even say or hear winner, winter, anymore in this world without at least thinking to yourself.

Absolutely, yeah. Winner, winter. I mean, in your head, you're thinking, you're saying it in your head. Yeah, you're saying it in your head. Oh, you have just, even if you're at home, would you hear, winner, winter. Somebody say chicken dinner. I mean, that's life.

That's where we're at. That's where we're at. Now, some people have taken it upon themselves to review and rate their own way, which is fine. Oh, that's even an extra winner. You just went elite. I know that, looks, I know that they only let you click five stars for the podcast. I know that. All right.

Still, though, it should be 20 stars. Now, we've got some that says they've clicked five stars, but they've reviewed good but not great. Wait, what? Yeah, I was confused about that. Very good podcast, really funny, except I was expecting more tips on how to hide pornography consumption and how to make a profit as a distributor. See, that's why it's not great.

It's good but not great because I wasn't giving them enough information. Those shows are coming up. Yeah, they are. They're on the plans. Cemetery rating. I like that. Somebody playing along. I like that 20 stars, best podcast ever.

Okay? So you should have stopped right there is what I'm saying. I don't have to do the right. They don't have to do the rest. Took the family to PR on spring break. Oh, Puerto Rico, yeah. My question is why. Because it's a vacation destination.

Tour guide said it's mandatory for all PR students to learn English. Yes, that's true. Good. Yeah, that's good. Yeah, I like it. Guess that started after Chris left. Oh. What?

That's what it says here. I know English. And there's subtitles. We even bought subtitles for this stupid show. Well, that's because of you, though. I know. So you're welcome. So you should not be complaining about my English.

Plus, let's be honest. And look, I know you love the show and Chris. I got it. He wrote that too, a big deal. But what people don't understand is if you speak another language and then you speak English, which is why it is surprising that he doesn't know it better if he learned it in school. They have to process. Public school.

Oh, yeah. Even in Puerto Rico. Holy God. If you think America's worst, think about Puerto Rico, we're freaking sitting bamboo sticks. You hear, I have to stop now for a moment because I could go a little bit farther. He just keeps pushing me farther and farther. I'm not going to take it this time. We'll just leave it and sit on bamboo sticks.

Yeah. Write your own jokes after that, okay? You're on your own. Go. Flourish. What they do is if you're speaking English, they hear what they want to say in their own language first. And then they have to, then it has to, you know, they have to translate it and spit out,

which is why sometimes it gets screwed up. I know that. I mean, that's fine. Doesn't make it any more listenable. But I understand. I understand the process. It's a cool process if you think about it. Is it?

Yes, because you're speaking to me in English right now. I'm translating it. Then I'm like, okay, I need to spit out what I'm going to say, but it has to be in English format, not in Spanish format, because if I say it in Spanish format, it's not the same sentence at all. So, which sometimes you cash those. The human brain is a wonderful thing. Right.

Just overwhelming. Keep the fat flowing. That's gross. Five stars, 20 stars, best podcast ever. It is a great fun break from the politics that are infiltrate every corner of our daily lives. You're welcome, I say. I know, which is why I start, which is why I believe that I wanted to take a break with

this podcast and just do some things that, Just, it does infect us. And politics doesn't, like our world does not revolve around politics. And somehow we've gotten that confused. We're also around, you know, how to hide you porn and how to be a better human. I will say, I'll say keep the fat flowing. It was by fish and chimp. Fishing ship.

Fish and chimp. Okay. And the next one, 20 stars, best podcast ever. Thank you for what you do every day. Keep me my sanity. You're welcome. But that was written by plugged horse. A plugged horse.

It was written by plugged horse. That's a reference to the bit we did on Pat Unleashed with the service horse. Flirty. No, we weren't talking about. We weren't talking about what's your face. Camille? Oh, I thought you were talking about Camilla. Camilla.

Camilla. Camilla. It's Camilla. Sorry, it was my fault. We talked about having the service horse on a plane, and I said the only way to, you know, keep it from doing this thing is plugging it. So you got to plug the horse.

Is that possible? It's really funny. You know. You grew up with farm and animals. I did. You know, my first job. I know. You've talked about it.

No, I don't think I have, though. What was it then? Was it the horse thing? Well, you say horse thing. I've done a number of horse things stories. Is with the guy, the old man, yes. And either you worked at a track or the guy supplied horses to the track.

It's one of those two. Okay. So obviously I haven't told the story before since you don't even know it. When I was a little kid, I mean, 10, 11, Mr. Wallace down the street. I worked for the railroad for 100 years, an old man at the time then.

I mean, he was probably younger than me now. but he owned show ponies and they kept him at the fairgrounds. Yeah, I know I've talked about this before because I remember coming home and asking my dad, hey, Mr. Wallace wants me to go to the fairgrounds and clean the horse. My dad's like, what are you talking to me for? Did you ask out to the fairgrounds? Would you let your kid go with a 70-year-old? I mean, I don't remember how old he was at the time.

He was an old man though at the time. He was retired. and you know all that. He had arthritis really bad. But I rode with him every Saturday. Went down, walked down to his house. He drove. Would you do it now?

Would you let Max go or, um, your other one? I let Max go now as a 17 year old. No, back in when Max was 10. No. No. I know. It's difficult. Is it because of, what, two days?

Oh, you don't know. That just doesn't feel right. Doesn't feel right in what way? Like Harvey Weinstein and Bill Cosby way or like, huh, that's sad. I know. That is really sad. And maybe I could get talked into it.

You know, like a... Hey, Jeffrey, you know me? I'm not going to dittle your kid. Yeah. Okay, fine. I could probably be talked into it. But you have to think about it twice. You have to do like a family meeting.

Yeah, I wouldn't be my dad like, get out. Get out. But that was my dad with me though. My dad was like, get out. And that was what? Back in the 80s. 70s, 50s, or 40s? Yeah, you know, it was back then.

So was it like at the 40s? Yeah, I think it was the 40s. So that's when horses was a big deal back in the back. Who's back then? Yeah. Don't forget, though, he did drive to the fergras. Oh, so there were automobiles. Just want to tell you that as you're investigating the story.

Not going to tell you, but. Was this in Michigan or Florida? This was in Michigan. Yeah, Michigan. Okay, yeah. So it's probably the 30s and 40s. Yeah. Good times.

In Australia, in Australia, a new law, a new rule is going into effect. And I love it. All right, it's the keeping cat safe plan. Right? With the cat by law, it's going to start in 2020. I love this. cat owners are going to need to make sure their cat is indoors from 8 p.m. to 7 a.m. every night. Indoorse households will only be allowed to keep two cats in their home.

Thank you. That's it. And what happens? You say, oh, I mean, what if my cat breaks out or, and it breaks out of the house? We don't know what happened. I open the door to get a delivery. and all of a sudden my cat did you out the door what's that no my cat it was just it just ran out I didn't have a chance to catch it yet yeah no this cat season you told me that they

that the cats are dead but it doesn't say this in the story I keep looking for the are you on the face with page or on this story no I'm on the story yeah they're gonna go because you told me they told me they kill the cat the cats are dead but in the story I keep waiting for the line We will terminate the cat if it's out of the house. If it doesn't say that in the story. I read all three pages. No, I only have one.

Oh, there's another one in there. Oh, no. Oh, here we go. Hold on, hold on. Does it say that they're actually going to... Cat behavior. Bodies cat is defined. The first counsel will speak to the keepers.

Undertaking enforcement action is unclear, what would involve Constitution. The public is a resident. All right now. Two cats will be exempt. If you already own more than two cats, you get the grandfather rule you're already on. So the building capacity, address, cat numbers. The curfew is also the best interest for the people's.

Amy Ferguson, the mayor, outcry about locals. Love cats, tolerate cats. By law, Australian government, plan to kill two cats. It doesn't say that they're going to shoot these stupid things. They're going to kill them. It doesn't say that. They will kill the cats. That's what people are so upset about.

The curfews from like 8 and 9 to, Yeah, eight at night until seven of the morning. I know that. It got all that. Yeah, if you cat is outside. It doesn't say that. I wanted to say that, but it doesn't say that. Undertaken force next, the behavior doesn't change. It's unclear.

If the behavior doesn't change, at first, the council will speak to the keepers of the cats deemed a nuisance. If the behavior doesn't change, it's... It doesn't say that that's what they're going. You have to read between the lines. Oh And it's Australia Oh now it's between the lines

It's Australia Not as good as it was brought up to be It's Australia You know the Aussies are going to be like cat It's a domino effect I will say that I will say that Have you seen it a little fluffy

Oh You shouldn't have got out of the house man Shouldn't have let it out of the house Kind of sad day for cats in Australia Download and subscribe to more content At the blaze.com slash podcast All right, welcome to the dessert section, the grizzle, the back fat, whoever you want to call it here on chewing the fat.

Don't forget that we do have the CTF hotline still up and running for your voicemails. 214-735-9356, powered by Patriot Mobile. And, you know, if you have comments, concerns, questions, or even just a thoughtful insight. use that number powered by Patriot Mobile [phone] Now in the past

we've had animal stories that we've used here chewing the fat and even prior to chewing the fat when it was just the Jeff Fisher show where they talked about orangutangs speaking and using vocal ranges that made

them being able to communicate through voice with humans. And now we have a scientist at the Indianapolis Zoo, claiming that the Great Apes can control their voice in a similar way to humans by teaching them how to play kazzoos. So that's the story. They're teaching them how to play kazzoos. But I go to the story that's in the news report. The news report is the zoo people are to let them play gazoos.

It's just people walking up and sticking kazooz. cage and the orangut that blows on the kazoo that's I mean big deal but the news report is very fascinating now according to this they have research at the zoos where the team studied 11 year old rocky and 36 year old nobi at the Indianapolis zoo it's different than just blowing air like you would through a whistle that's just blowing I don't know I got news for you The news report just showed the blowing air. Okay? So I don't know what kind of research you're doing.

But we'll see. I know there's, all right, so you're going to hear the local news. And then we've got Dr. Rob Shoemaker from the Indianapolis Zoo. And then we show a little baby orangutan. We show Rocky and Kenobi at the Indianapolis Zoo. I might have to get them on the phone. I might want to talk to the researchers about this ring because I, I find it difficult to believe that someone just sticking a zoo between the bars in the face of a orangutan

counts as the orangutan are playing kazoo. The orangutans are playing kazoo. No? But let's hear the news. We'll head to the Indianapolis Zoo this weekend. Here's a live look through. There's a live look to. The animals here doing more than just greeting visitors.

That's right. I'll take it over from here. Part of the ground-breaking your study. Right here, I will pick up. It has scientists. Thank you. Talking. That was supposed to do it to begin with it.

Forget it. Screwed out. And the primates playing musical instruments. As Mike Myers is here. Tell us more about it. Hey, guys. Well, the scientists were able to teach two orangutans to play an instrument. Okay, but they never showed that.

Okay, they were building us up for this. Scientists have taught these orangutans how to play the instruments. I haven't played since you were a kid, and it's already changing the way. That's not true either. Go ahead. It's orangutan baby. The orangutan center of Indianapolis Zoo is special. Thank you.

Special for the kids visiting with their parents. It's an orangutan baby. It's an orangutan baby. The large field trip groups. But two of these playful apes can do something no one ever thought was possible. Well done. Okay. Stop.

All right, so that's fantastic. You think that's really cool. The orangutan played the gazoo. They just stuck it in his face through the cage. Any animal at the zoo would do that. You stick a zoo in the face of a giraffe after the giraffe stuck his big eight-foot tongue out. He'd blow into the gazoo. You'd get the same thing.

Oh, look at that. Look who's a good little orangutan blowing into the gazoo, baby. Come here. Well done. They can play the... No, they can't. Go ahead. It's different than just...

Stop it. No, baby. We need to rethink the research, okay? All right, go ahead. WGNL, ABC News, is rewarding. It's different than just blowing air like you went through a whistle. That's just blowing.

But to use a kazoo, you have to actually vibrate your vocal cord. It worked. They were just blowing into it through the cage. That's what we're calling research now. Times are tough in the research. You have to actually vibrate your vocal cords, your vocal folds. Now see, that's what I'm talking about.

That's the kind of stuff I'm talking about. The orangutans doing some distance. Like the orangutans that we had earlier in from the show that were actually speaking using vocal arrangements. Thank you. Let's see Rocky and Kanobe do that in Indianapolis. Why, they can't. That's why. They can't. Scientists at the zoo have found that great apes can control their voice in a similar way to humans. Studying 11-year-old Rocky and 36-year-old Kenobi. They say these findings may hold the key to how language evolves.

That was pretty good. This challenges some beliefs that have been held for a very, very long time. And people are going to have to rewrite their textbooks. And it's Indianapolis on the map. This result has gotten international attention immediately. All populations of orangutans in the wild are critically. Because you falsely advertised that they were playing kazzoos. That's why you're on the international map.

We absolutely need more people to add their voice to support orangutan conservation in the wild. Stop using palm oil from Southeast Asia. because that's where they live in the palm oil farms. And they're getting down to practically nothing. They actually are. They're struggling to live. However, the palm oil is used in products that we humans use, so we're not giving it up for the orangutans.

I was like, p. And I hope they find someplace else to live. And that's what they're saying right there. Visitors Visitors now saying hello to orangutans that are changing the way scientists think about great apes around the world. The zoo says there are a few things you can do to support critically endangered orangutans. They recommend only using sustainable palm oil because non-sustainable palm oil is the number one reason, actually, that orangutans are disappearing in the wild. And you can find it in a lot of household products like shampoo and lotion.

And also you can just visit the zoo because the zoo actually provides funding to conservation. Visit the zoo, baby. Okay. So who did they send the money to the zoo visits the zoo sends the money? Don't worry about it. To the orangutan community? The liaison. What they do is the zoo drops off like pallets of orangutans.

They've got pallets of palm oil to the orangutans in Southeast Asians. Here you go. Organizations. The nose that component of all of this. Yes. Yeah, absolutely. We don't need to hear this. There's a little after talk.

No, I want to hear the after talk. What are you doing? No, I want to hear the after talk. Yeah. You guys have been playing them all right. I'm not that great. There we go. So the reporter brought in.

Do they give these feet to you at the zoo? No, I bought them off Amazon. You bought them a lot. Okay, hold on. Oh, sweetheart. There don't have a freaking dollar store. You had to go to Amazon. I know, right?

That's her tough. She's, no, she's, this is, uh, Indianapolis. WGNO. The WGNO is not in Indianapolis, though, right? You would think that it had a live camp to Indianapolis, you'd think they're in Indianapolis. I don't think so, though. Maybe.

WGNO, TV schedule, where are you at? Now I got to hold on. Now I'm ticked. You'd think that that's where it would be, right? But I didn't feel like that was Indianapolis. Please hold, too. Yeah, it feels like it's Louisiana. Yeah, WG&O, that's Louisiana.

They're off hold now. You want to kill the hold music? I mean, thanks for holding, but we already decided it was in Louisiana. Look at you. All about the past. Look at you. How much money? $4.

Okay. I mean, it's $8. She spent $12 bucks, I don't know, six. Cool story. Well, IU and Purdue football both have their. You know what that story was? That story is, I don't know if you know this about local news, but they get, they get, like, network stories fed to them. Yes.

Yes. You know, down the television world TV line. And they've got the package for the Indianapolis Zoo. Homegirl stands in front of the screen and goes, and let's go to the Indianapolis Zoo now. And there you go. So she sees this come down the line on Friday. Orders the kazzoos from Amazon.

Gets herself a couple, gets three kazzoos for the show, stands in front of the green screen. Let's go to the Indianapolis Zoo. And then walks back over to the desk. Kick my gazoo. Hurry, hurry, hurry. Walks back to the desk. It's kazoo time at the desk.

I mean, that's money, though. I love local news. They are a lost. Local news runs America. I love it. Lester Hold, I love you. You're my main man on network news, but local news, man. So what's the verdict?

Did the orangutans or whatever the monkeys were, did they play the gazoo? I feel like, I mean, you ask, did. But I feel like we didn't see the actual research. And we didn't see, they're talking big about the research and talking big about the orangutan's playing the kazoos and doing that, but I feel like

they didn't give us the research. Yeah, that's just some kids sticking it in his face. Yeah, that sounds like in a bad dandy bathroom. Yeah, oh, I mean, that's like grandpa sitting in his wheelchair at home on the holidays. I got a kazooz. And they

chubbing in front of grandpa's face four no grandpa we want you to play the kazoo here thank you grandpa okay I can play the kazoo I can play the kazoo too I told you I can play it sounds like one of your grandma's pooters I mean okay

I'd like to actually see some the footage because we have reports of old world monkeys combining items in speech that nobody else shows their communications with each other, how they communicate with each other over birds and different types of animals and different kind of grooming habits.

So, I mean, they're studying that there are communication aspects. I just, and we do know that the orangutans actually do have, you know, a vocal range that they can pick up on. I need you to stop watching your documentaries. I feel like you're going to just start talking about the documentary plan of the apes. In the primates?

And the primate, yeah. I don't want to know that your research was compiling evidence from those documentaries. I'm just saying, no. No, no, I look. I'm not taking anything away from the documentaries. Okay, okay, okay. The main documentaries, I think there was,

well, there were four really good ones, Planned of the Apes. And I love those. Those are great movies. The old version or the new version? Both. Me too. The new versions are great.

The new versions are really... James Franco did great. 100%. The new versions are really good. A lot of fun. But they actually, scientists have actually talked about how the different monkeys

have different sounds and sequences for... Yeah, we all know that. It's like the whales and the dolphins. Wow. And the dogs and the cats. Well, not cats. Cats don't communicate. The jerks.

The birds, you know, the elephants. We all know that. And if you was putting... a kazoo. And let's say, let's say you're out swimming and a whale swims up to you. And you go, hey, whale, and you stick a kaz

and you stick a kaz in front of the whale. Now you've done research the whale can play the kaz. Can I do that to an alligator? In fact, we should do that research and the answer for you is yes. You have no idea how I want that to happen. Before we go away, can I play you something? Before we go away, can I play you something?

Hey, Jackie and Chris, this is Mandy. I'm calling in. I was just listening to the podcast. I had to pause it because I liked the idea of the chewing the grisles, but I think I got a little bit better than an idea. Can we stop for just a second? Kind of disappointing that you were listening today. Okay, go ahead.

section maybe I don't know if anybody listens or if you guys have ever done the keto diet Jeffrey oh Jeffrey uh no one one of the one of the reason why I want to result because she has a very key question um how many times have you done the keto diet well well she didn't ask you that but she says you know if you've done the keto diet but I'm asking you how many times I'm very familiar with the keto diet you are you are very familiar with the keto diet you are very familiar with the keto diet. And I have, the reason I'm familiar with it is because I've been familiarizing myself with the keto plan.

There are several different keto plans. I like the dental plan. Depending on your body type and, you know, blood type and different types. And then heart attack, pre-heart attack, post-heart attack, during heart attack. I mean, why you bring that? I think that plays key role in the keto diet. Does it? Yeah.

Does it? Yes. I mean, I've lost 25 pounds since the first of the year. And you've not smoked cigarette for... I'd like to say that I've lost more, but I've gone off the wagon a few times. Oh, no. Yeah. Off the keto or on the keto?

Oh, okay. Oh, okay. Oh, okay. So, you know, me and keto, man. Are synced? Oh. Okay. But there's a thing that I use a keto diet, they call fat bomb.

there's also a thing called in the Jeff Fisher household called Fat Bomb. What are those? I can't tell you about it on the air. Go ahead. And a fat bomb is basically like a dessert you can have, doesn't, you know, have all the bad stuff. Okay, now you're, it's Mandy. I just want to, wait a minute for just a second.

We'll go back and listen so we hear exactly what Mandy's talking about. But I got to tell you, and I appreciate to call, Mandy, but right here you're pissing me off. Because you're talking like, you're talking down to me. You briefed keto I thank you You actually the one They've been teaching people

You do courses You know The way you're The way you're talking right there On your little voicemail I know it's voicemail We're not You know face to face or anything

But You're pushing it Mandy I'll tell you that right And a fat bomb It's basically like a dessert You can have Doesn't have all the bad stuff for you Yeah see that tone right there

You don't like that tone Go ahead I want to cut her on That might be another good alternative For dessert maybe you can call that that ball so I want to know

it's an idea throwing it out there anyways I did have an idea too oh boy she's full of ideas Jeff Fisher I mean she is full of ideas

thanks for calling for I don't know there was something else you guys talked to that I think it was for the this is a perfect example stop right here

this is a good example of why whenever when you say to yourself you know somebody's how long did you you talk to that person, to your wife, say for example.

Okay. Oh, we talk for a couple hours. I gotta tell you, I have never talked to anyone on the phone for a couple hours. No, me neither. Never. No. I may have talked to, I remember talking to my mom for 20 minutes, maybe, maybe. You know, you call, hey, how you doing?

Love you. What's going on? How was your day? Oh, all right, I'm done. But that right there is why women stay on the phone for hours, because she's already done with her thought. Thank you. The fat mom. She's already done. Thank you. We're finished. I've already hung up. I'm done. And yet, she's still beandering. And then there's, oh yeah, you know, and there it is. Then there's another point. So you got to stick with it. You got to stick with the other point.

Had you hung up would have been gone. The dating app for non-binary people. And I was thinking, I don't know all the acronyms. for the LGBT, U-S-B-E-A-T-E-F-G community. I'm sorry, but that, I should have bleeped all that because that is very homophobic. Yeah. We let a slide. Oh, you let a slide?

Oh, okay, okay. But I do know that maybe, you know, because there's like that coffee meat, bagel, and there's those type of things. So maybe you could do like one that's like, there's a coffee bagel kind of dessert thing. I'm a fan of coffee. I'm a fan of bagels.

Huge fan of bagels. Yes. I send bagels. You know, this pre-keto days. L-T meets G, but I don't think that's all the letters that they use. But that might be one because E is, I guess, for bi, fellows, for lesbian, T is for trans, and then, you know, ELT makes G would be gay. I don't know.

Just another idea. Are we done now or are we going to ramble some more? I thought I'd throw that out there, too. Anyways, thanks, thanks, man. Thanks for the great content. this show. Love you too. Have nice day. Is that it? Yeah, that's it. Yeah. I just love that by the end. She's just

and maybe I didn't know, plan your call, write it out. And, you know, I'm going to say this. But she's not used to that. No, she's not. And I'm sick of you hollering at Mandy. I'm not hollering at him. No, you hollered at it. You called her talking down to us. You said that. Talked to her about rambling. You said that. Just stop talking bad about her. Because she's just nice and calling and friendly and now you're being a douche

now you're being a douche I mean there's plenty more stories we can get to which you already said before we wrap up and then I didn't realize we were going to an 80 minute call from Mandy what are I supposed to call the fat bomb turn the music down

I don't know what I'm talking or I guess that's supposed to mean I'm over right? All right sorry Mandy