Chewing the Fat with Jeff Fisher - Ep 256 | Smart Criminals vs. Dumb Criminals & Animal News

Episode Date: November 25, 2019

It’s Monday and today Jeffy is talking about criminals and how they are either getting dummer or we have awesome police technology. In China they want you to try donkey because... you decide. Finally we learn how to make sure our cows last longer and yes it involves painting and stripes.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

And now, a Blaze Media podcast. Okay. I know it's Thanksgiving week. For those of you listening live Monday, 1125, 2019. Right. Thank you. That's how much money we spend on production here on June the Fat. That's our, I believe that was supposed to be a turkey.

But I just want you to know. What else would it be? I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. But I just want to tell you there's a list of things you need to be concerned about this week. you're going out shopping for food. All right.

E. coli salmonella. We have a romaine lettuce recall. Oh, come, my. For those of you from Salinas, California. E. coli outbreak. 40 people, 16 states. We have the raw pork products. 515,000 pounds of raw park items produced and distributed in Illinois.

Those are recalled. Because, remember, they got in without inspection. We have chicken fried rice recall. 172,000. 692 pounds of chicken fried rice. And who doesn't have chicken fried rice on Thanksgiving. Yes, that's like pinnacle. We have cheese nip recall.

Oh, I saw that one. How to throw mine away? No, you take it back for get money. That's what I did wrong. You don't just throw it. Oh, that's why they always throw it in. That's what they want you to do. You fell into big recall.

But I ate half of it. They always say, oh, you shouldn't have thrown it away. You're good. Oh, I thought you did. If you've already dug in. Like if you've already cooked the pork chop And it's part of the 550,000 515,000 pounds

It's silly to eat it Move on Don't worry about it The cheese nip Requel We are going to hell quick And Cottage cheese recall

9,500 cases of cottage cheese being recalled Wow Breakstone's cottage cheese so far craft times reports have been six consumer complaints of contamination what is going on they found a red piece of red plastic in the container oh not good and don't forget the blackberry recall hepatitis A in Indiana so I mean be careful be careful how does the world come to

Don't you need blackberries To the blackberry pie That's usually what blackberry pies are made of Yeah I don't know I'm not a baker fun If I were to order say A blackberry pie

I would expect there to be in blackberries in it With I have a tiny Man I think you cook it out Today Crime and Animal Day Yes

Crime and Animal Day It is amazing that I kept putting stories into the crime pile. Now there's a fat pile, but inside the fat pile is a crime pile. And then there's an animal pile. Then there's just health pile. And then there's just a regular pile of stuff. But they're all encompassed in the fat pile. Student Chris Cruz with your hand up.

Does that mean that we're not going to have a fat pile Friday this week? No fat pile Friday this week. It's a holiday. It's Black Friday. shopping. Spend money. Black Friday's at a holiday. It's an American holiday. No, it's holiday. Okay. We shouldn't even call it Black Friday anymore, but we are. I'm surprised they're still allowing it. We're still there. We're still there. We're still allowing it to be called Black Friday. But yeah, you got to go out and shop. Spent some

money. Get the economy going again. Let's go. Pick it up because it's not booming at all now. Wait, it is. Thanks to Donald Trump. Oh, don't hit the sounder. I'm just going off about the economy. So, we're not. do we start? Do we start with animals? Do we start with crime? Animals. Top 50 cities for the most rat infested cities. That is a Jeffie segment. Now, of course you know that during colder months, rodent activity increases as these pests seek shelter and warm areas with readily available food and water. In fact, the National Pest Management Association, the MPMA, And who doesn't know that?

No one is a bigger fan of the NPMA than this program. I get their magazine biweekly. So the 24% of homeowners report mice infestations specifically in the winter. Now, I find it strange that they're calling it mice infestations because it's usually rats. And to me, there's a difference, but maybe to the NPNA. I'm sorry, I apologize, I've got to get that right. NPMA. past management association.

They're saying it's a mice infestation. So you'd think to yourself, after all the news this year, that the number one city. Baltimore. Right. Thank you. Elijah coming. Yes. But no.

And we lost him. We lost Elijah. Wait, what? Yeah, are you sure? Yeah, we lost him. No, no, seriously. Are you sure? It was reported that he died.

Did you see a body? I did not. I never saw a body. I saw a coffin. Was there in state loo, something? I saw a coffin that said, hey, Elijah's in there, but that's it. I never saw Elijah in there. Or what used to be Elijah in there.

Was there like a state of emergency? What is it that they do when they put a body of member? Yes. Yes, there was a state of emergency. They said, holy crap. He's dead. Close that coffin. That's what they did.

That's why people were so angry. Because Trump issued a state of emergency. I think Trump issued that while he was still alive and then he died, but I don't know. I could be wrong. So the number one city is not Baltimore. It is not Baltimore. Why are you? I actually do see Trump doing that.

Yes, I know. That way it's true. So Madison, Wisconsin is 50. Why are we in Madison, Wisconsin? Oh, because it's top 50. Okay. We're starting at 50? I'm not going through.

I can give you, though. 50. These are all cities listeners that listen to chewing the fat. Is there a percentage that? My hometown. Oh, here we go. Tampa Bay. The three cities, Flint, Saginaw Bay City in Michigan.

That's in the thumb of Michigan up there. So that has rat infestation. Flint Sagina Bay, that's 46th. Okay, hold, let me write this on. One of them is a 46, okay? All right. My hometown. Tampa Bay.

Tampa St. Pete. Uh-huh. Oh, they put Sarasota in parentheses here too, so they're giving you the whole Tampa St. Pete Sarasota. These are TV markets, I'm guessing. 40th. 40th. Not bad. Okay, that's not bad. Not bad for a bit. No, not bad at all.

That's pretty good. Give me another city you lived in. Like Philadelphia. Is Philadelphia in there? Philadelphia is definitely. Philadelphia is definitely on this list. It's got to be up here. Philadelphia is number nine. Yeah. Number nine. I lived in

Wehawk at New Jersey. gotta be i can't believe that there's not a new jersey hard for no north of new orleans richmond charlotte rabbit san los buffalo national where's dallas orlando 39th oh Orlando 39th ohlando more than Tampa take that disney i thought i thought Dallas was in the in the first page is they're like 14 or oh yeah 50th Dallas 4 okay now i feel better oh man what am i who i thought i haven't seen any rats around here yeah you should come to my garage at my old house. Well, that's because you had crap in there. No, that's because it was wintertime and they were looking. I don't know if you read the report

from the National Pest Management Association. The MPTTS. The NPMA, yeah. They rodent activity increases during colder months. And that's what happened in my house. The rodent activity increased. I killed them all, though. Sorry, Peter, but I killed them all. I got rid of them all. I don't think Peter cares about the rats Yes they do Oh they do? Oh they attacked me

Yes when we were talking about Yes they got angry with them I got into a fight with them over the It's a rat They deserve the same rights No they do not I agree but Peter does not When they were using

When they were using ice To kill them When they'd stuff the Oh okay Dry ice dry ice into the rat homes in the cities and then that would kill the rats and pita was up in arms over the stuffing of dry ice into their burrows up in arms and they took offense to my tweeting that they're just rats so not to pita they're not just rats so we could do the top 10

although Baltimore, amazingly, is not in the top 10. Baltimore is 12th. So apparently they've been doing some rat killing in Baltimore, which is pretty surprising. Top 10. Rat infested cities. Here we go. Give me the top 10.

Thanks to Orkin. Hey, those are my pest people. There you go. They're spending your money wisely, giving you rat infested. The radiest. I think that's the headline. Radius cities in America Radius cities in America

Number 10 Atlanta, Georgia Yeah Number nine I told you Philadelphia Number eight Minneapolis St. Paul Ooh, it's cold there

a long time too They find there And everybody's home Seven Cleveland Akron and Canton Yeah well those are little Cleveland Number six Detroit Oh yeah

Absolutely Number five San Francisco Without pooping the floor. Yeah, that draws them. Number four, which surprisingly isn't number one. So apparently they're just counting the animals of rats. Not the people.

Not the humans. Washington, D.C. Yeah, because if you do count the human rats, it's number one. It's number one. Number three. New York. Yeah, you guys have the biggest, too.

Number two, Los Angeles, California. I wonder why. That one I don't get. Number, there's a... I think that one, the kind of in the people that lived there. Okay. The Hollywood star celebrity. Number one.

City in America, the radiest city of America. No drum roll? The radiest city in America. Chicago, Illinois. Chicago, come on down here and accept your trophy. Yes, it's a giant rat. No. That's not

Chris Christy No, it's not Chris Christie and it's not from the pizza place How can I think of the pizza place I know you're talking about We just did the story about

Yes, we did, yes Why can't I think of Seriously stop the music Why can't I think of the stupid Pizza Place The Rat Pizza Place Chucky Cheese No it is not Chucky Cheese

That thank you We know it looks like A trophy of Chuckie Cheese but no it's not. It's a giant rat. Chicago, Illinois. Come on now. Yes.

And hey, you're in a copy. Here's a big block of cheese to take with you, too. Congratulations. The radiest cities in America. Okay. Now what? Speaking of rats.

Are you ready to eat donkey? Yes. Are you ready to eat donkey? Well... You're already there. If you eat lamb, you're already eating donkey. in China now

their big thing from fat wangs donkey burger oh is that a restaurant yes it is I want to go there it's fat wangs it's like they have the butthole

over here chicken butthole yeah chicken buffalo what are you talking about it's a career restaurant have you never been there no oh you should

it's that's where the remember that post I put on Facebook of my food moving. Oh, yeah, I follow you on Facebook. That's for sure. Okay, and on Instagram. Did you see it?

Yeah, yeah, I follow you there too. That's where you get this live food that, you know. I do remember, yes, and it was at the butthole place? Yeah, chicken butthole. Yeah, you have a little chicken with a butthole in it. It's really cool. So Fat Wangs is growing in popularity. The Fat Wangs Donkey Burger restaurants in Beijing.

And it is soon you can bet if it's not already here. Now, I wouldn't be surprised if it's already here in America, they're just not calling it donkey burgers, right? Because we already joke about some other, you know, types of restaurants serving dogs and cats. But don't know. But the people are all excited about the fat wangs donkey burger joints. I just want a fat wang here in Dallas.

Right next to the chicken buffalo. You could quote me out of that. Yes, I want a fat wang here in Dallas. But Jeff, don't you already have a fat wang? Oh, thank you. Thank you. Be here all week. Anyway, something to look forward to.

Fat wang's donkey burger coming to a city near you soon. Animals. Since we're on. We want to start with animals, right? The nail salon worker. we saw the footage of the lady who, uh, sure, sure you go to a nail salon to get your nails done. Get your fingernails done.

Get your toenails done. Get the massage of your forearms and your thighs and your calves. But don't you also want your deer gutted, dressed and field tested for you while you're getting your nails done? No, I feel dressed right there in the story. No, she was, she was field dressing. So she was putting a dress on the deer. No.

I know you've been hunting before. Yeah, and you just gut the deer. It's called field dress. You skin it and then you just cut it in pieces and put it in a bag and put it in your fridge. It's called field dressing. But the photo salon in North Carolina, she just puts down the tar. Starts cutting the deer up. Good for her.

Yeah, good for her. There's got to be some kind of law against that's all right. Absolutely. I mean, I'm against it. Oh, yeah. She should not be prohibiting this lady from. feel dressing. I guess it's her shop. Maybe it's not. Maybe she's not.

Maybe she's not her shop. Then she needs to, I hope she has permission. But, I mean, go in, get a pedicure, get your deer field dressed. Or gutted. Field dressed. And take it home. Good luck. I hope she doesn't. I don't know if you ever, have you ever actually cut up a deer? Yeah. Yeah. You do not want to hit the. No, the sack. Yeah. Because it sticks. The whole meat.

You never get rid of that. Yeah. Just throw it away. I should be doing that on Wednesday and Thursday, so. Hitting the sack? Oh, yeah. It's not a good idea. I'll tell you that.

You'll be here all week? I will be here all week. Okay, good. New Jersey neighborhood. Speaking of turkeys. Cabo, cabo? So you give me that god-awful impression of turkeys at the beginning. That was an idiot.

First one was better. Yeah, it was. I literally can't say it. That's not it. That's not it either. Just play it back. Roll back to tape. It's so far away.

Yeah, it does. So apparently there's wild turkeys that are rolling around New Jersey. There it is. There it is. I'll try again. So people are all wound up about the wild turkeys in New Jersey along the Jersey shore. So they're gathering them up. Yeah.

Are they being parted? They're gathering them up. No, I've. They're gathered. Thank you. I don't. I'm going to gobble, gobble,

can I take? Shoot them. I'm out of them. Hi gosh. You used to say the finger forever. 20 and 23,000 wild turkeys

in New Jersey. That's a lot of shooting. Right. Wow. That's a lot of turkeys. You know, when I lived in New Jersey, I lived in the fine city of Wehawk in New Jersey for a summer

on Park Avenue. And I used to walk, you know, back and forth to the bus stop. This is the last bus stop in New Jersey and then it would just take you into Manhattan. Right there was by the Lincoln Tunnel. And there was no turkeys, but there was a wild chicken in this lot.

I used to pass every day. Every day you'd walk down the sidewalk. And the way Wehawken is built, you know, it's up against the granite rock mountain that they dug it out of. And so there's just a slab with some brush and weeds growing and a concrete wall that's next to the sidewalk.

that you're walking against. And every morning that chicken would be down on the wall, smoking a cigarette, giving you a turkey, good morning. And a chicken, good morning. And you say, okay, okay, good morning. I'm just going to the bus, man. Stop smoking, okay?

Take it easy. So if you're in New Jersey, good luck, God bless. Get your weapons out. And this story from Los Angeles, California. They're ranked in the, the radiest cities of America. They are, yeah. We also now have FedEx deliverers going around killing people's animals.

Nope, they didn't shoot them. Yeah, they're not shooting them. A FedEx driver was delivering a package to a home in Los Angeles. That's what they do. Yeah, and FedEx is pretty quick. It's what they do. They bring it to the house. And if you've got a gate or, you know, a yard that's protected.

Yeah, I asked them to do that a couple of times. But sometimes let's say the guard is, let's say the gate is locked or it's guarded by a dog. Okay. You just toss the package over the, over the gate, right? Oh, no. What do you mean? Oh, no. That's what you do to do to the package, as long as it's not a fragile package.

Yeah, but you said there's a dog in the back yard, right? There is a dog. That's why he didn't go into the back here. Didn't open the gate. I'm trying to see something happy coming out of this, but I feel like. Now there's nothing happy coming out of this. Nothing happens. The FedEx driver, whoop.

He's got a Yorkshire. Terrier, go good Lord. Oh, that is not a dog. Okay. I was about to feel bad. I am so happy. That's not a dog. That was a rat.

No wonder they're in festing. So apparently two people, their four-year-old terrier, they were sunbathing in the backyard. Oh, I just puked. And the FedEx driver tosses the package. Which contained crystal and a Christmas present. So it was fragile. Come on, man. What are you doing?

Jeff Fisher. Because of course you toss it over the fifth of us. I even said it was not fragile. Oh, wow. Jeffie, as a sitting member of the governor board of the United States Police Office. My people would not do this. Okay, they would not do this.

No. No. My people would not do it. My people would just leave the package outside the gate and move on. Come and get your damn package. Bang on the door. You've got a stupid yep and little Yorkshire dog puppy in the back. I'm not delivering it.

And I'd be okay. I'm behind him 100%. So he tosses the. the box over. He's got a box from FedEx. Okay. And he tosses it over the fence. Hey, that one says fragile, do not drop.

It's right there. He says, flip it, flip it. Where I'm looking at. Fraggle do not drop. Do we just kill another dog? I have no idea. But I didn't do that. We have audio recording and the cameras are all pointing at you as we speak.

It's not addressed to me so I don't care. That's not the fed. Reddick's never. That's literally exactly how the FedEx Robert felt and it's not for me I don't care. Plus it should have fragile at both sides. Right? You should not be grabbing. I think that's a crime. Isn't that like a federal crime right now? Touch a package? Yes. You are touching someone else a package. Indeed. Bolt just came off the board. Look at the bolt. Look at the bolt. Look at the bolt. What are you talking about?

Just wrap this up. Play music. Turn the cameras off. Holy cow. If you are watching this, turn the cameras off. Oh my gosh. The whole thing is gone to hell.

And that's what happened to the FedEx driver because the dog, the dog was left in a puddle of blood with his box on him. Apparently, now, how does the dog get lung and liver damage from a FedEx box?

The box dropped on the dog and you get internal damage So apparently they took him in to get him taken care of and, uh, yeah. So goodbye to the little, to Cooper, the Yorkshire Terrier. Sad we lost them. FedEx has got to pay for that, right? I mean, FedEx has got to pony up some cash for that. They can't allow that.

We'll give you $75 bucks, the same that United gave to the lady. How much did it cost a? That's what we're covering. So did you catch the American Music Awards on, uh, Sunday night? Yeah. Me either and apparently not a lot of people did either. What is that?

Record low ratings for the American Music Awards, the AMAs. I know. I thought it was like MTV Awards. You know. Oh, that's different. MTV Awards are separate and then you have the Grammys. But this is the AMAs. I didn't know.

Then you have the CMAs with the Country Music Association. Now that one I know. My girl Dolly was there. So the show scored a 1.7 rating. down 6% from last year. That's because Trump wasn't featured. Right? Now it did gain a little fraction of total viewers coming in with 6.7 million.

Last year they had 6.5 million. That doesn't. That's the same. The same people are watching. But they gained. They did gain. They gained a couple hundred thousand people. A couple hundred thousand people forgot to turn their cable box off.

He walked away. They were in the other room watching the NFL game because that's who, I mean, Sunday night football won that game and won the ratings for a regular football. And there was a game, a football game that went long

for CBS, so that took a bunch of the ratings. Is that the Harbor game? No. No, no, no. That's Saturday. That was college. You know the NFL is Sundays. College of Saturdays. It's the way it's played. It was on Wednesdays. The Harvard Yale game where what Chris was talking about

is where they protested climate change. You know, that's stupid game. First of all, I know I get it's a classic. Harvard Yale, been around for, you know, it's the longest running. Yeah, Pat, talk about it this morning. A hundred and thirty-eight-something years. Whatever.

It's been one of the longest running robberies. You know, they're protesting for, you know, them to be green and to cancel. It's that like the greenest stadium in the world. There's no lights. There's no lights. Please do that this weekend at the Alabama-Auburn game. Please protest.

Please protest at the LSU game this weekend. Pick a game. Wait a couple of weeks. Do it at the LSU Georgia game for the SEC championship. Do that. Go ahead. Let's protest there. The game continued on as people were killed and trampled on the field

and the game played on. Fans seemed unamused and unmoved by the so-called protest. I mean, it's just ridiculous. And of course, all the usual suspects are all for it. It's ridiculous. And the American Music Awards, of course, is where we had the big to do over Taylor Swift and her feud. But she ended up singing the songs, of course. Of course it happened.

She ended up singing a stupid song She was so angry about She now beats, holds the record Over Michael Jackson For the most awards It's ridiculous And she came out with her With her

Prison-style white shirt on This is what you missed Those of you, nobody, no one watched this So what you missed was her coming out With her prison-style white shirt Stenciled with the names of the six albums her old label owns. I'm the same shirt.

It didn't say how much money she made from selling those six albums to the new company. Don't bug me down with facts. It's ridiculous. Don't bog me down with facts. That's facts that should not weigh anything on her losing all her previous albums and songs

that she wrote about her ex-boyfriends. That broke her heart. Stop. Just stop. So I'm looking at a list last night that is amazing and I haven't gone through it all because I think there's got to be more.

I think there has to be more. So you're going to come half cocked at this? I am. You're half cocked at this. Because this list is all the TV shows that aired in 2019. All the TV shows that aired in 2019. It goes down, starts with all the networks. And it goes down to how many shows?

How many shows do you think? And just so you know, this list excluded children's and reality programming. All right. So this is just television. This is just shows. Like walking dead. Just entertainment shows. Just entertainment shows. And that list is how many total from January to December? How many shows? How many television shows? I feel like 352. Really? Yeah. That's where you're at. That's where I'm at. 543. Yeah. I thought 300 something was too high. But yeah, that makes sense. Now, does that include streaming services?

Yeah. Netflix originals. YouTube. And that's not bad. I mean, there's a, I got to go through all these. Does that include you in the fact? You know what? Hold on a second.

I'm going to say, there's the blaze. The blaze on here. Hold on. The blaze, the blaze is not under the. So let's go to Blaze. It's B. Yeah, check B and A. If it's not Blaze, it's just check Blaze Media.

Oh, boy. Hold on. Oh, no. Don't. No, don't do that. Oh no. Oh, no. Okay, here we go.

Okay, you found the B. Oh, hold on, ABC, Acorn, Amazon, Acorn. Hold on, Acorn. Yeah, Acorn, yeah, that's a good one. You don't have Acorn? It is? Yeah. Okay.

Okay, come on, stop with the... This Google Doc sheet is gonna tick me off. Okay, there you go. All right, let me see, Acorn. Who's on Acorn? Okay, here we go again. Why is it doing that? What aired on Acorn?

Girlfriends, Mid-Summer Murder, series, Murdoch Mysteries, no offense, striking out, series two. The Good Karma Hospital, I bet you that's a good one. I bet you that's a rippering. I bet you that's a take on general hospital. It sounds riveting. It is. Sounds riveting.

I mean, soap opera. And a place to call home. Detectoris series three, the final season. Are that, how come I haven't seen the, have you watched the Detectoris? Yeah, that one is like Dexter. from Showtime. Right. Yeah.

Got all the Amazon shows. Yeah, Bosch, Carnival Row, Fleabag, Goliath, Good Olman's, Hand on the Rain of Mottel, Man on the Hot Castle, the Marvelous Miss Maisel. Boy, I continue to try to get into that show. The Marvelous Miss Maisel. I continue, continue to attempt to get into that show.

It has all you like. I continue to attempt to get into that show. And I, I made it. Take it through about an episode and a half and I just have to go away. Freaking Jewish people being Jewish. I just. Like boobies hanging out. Like it has everything you like.

You know, I just want to be clear about something. Okay. You know, the episodes that I've seen. Alcohol smoking. The episodes that I've seen of the Marvelous Mrs. Maisel has not had boobies hanging out. Although you're not in enough. I think episode three is where she gets drunk and her,

she literally takes a top off in the middle of her set and like just flaps it out and the comedy is great. I continue to try to get into that show. Of course the comedy is. Yeah, the dad, he plays, Mr. Monk, he plays such a good role. And it's quick timing too. Come on, dude. Come over. We'll watch it together.

Continue to do it. Yeah. Yeah. Just get it. All right. So I'm going to go down this list. We're going to dig into this TV list because I, there's so many shows on this. Well, what's wrong with it?

That you feel it's not enough? Yeah. I feel like there's more. I mean, we are in the golden age of television right now, man. We are in the streaming. Streaming. Well, okay. Not television.

Golden age of viewing content. VOD. VOD. Yeah. I mean, it's just, there's so. so many good things. And there's a lot of bad things too. A lot of crappy things. I get it. But there's so many good things. So many and so many talented people without me that are creating content for viewing that is wonderful.

But people are creating content without you? That's impossible. That's disappointing. Yeah, that's no way. Disappointing. I know. It's disappointing. Can I tell you? That's what I'm saying. It's disappointing. All right, before we dig into the crime stack in the fat pile, one last animal story. If you're driving around and you see what looks like cattle, but they have stripes on them like zebras. They're cattle. They're cattle.

The white striped animals are now part of a deal that Japan has started, and it's coming here very soon. they've wondered for years why they were losing you know they're losing like a couple billion dollars a year they lose cattle to insect bites biting the cattle so the zebras don't get bit as much as cattle and they're trying to figure out why it's the stripes so they're painting stripes on the cattle to keep them from getting don't put your head in your hand

that's a million dollar idea so the Well, I know. That is a million dollar. The white striped cows sustained only half as many bug attacks as other cow groups. So right now. Stop talking. Just go. Your company should be these painting cows.

Come on, man. And they're pretty big. So that's a pretty big canvas. That's a big job. That's a big canvas. That's a big job. We've got to figure out a way to do it quick like a rabbit. Car wash.

You bring them through. Car wash. You bring them through with a, they just a, they just drop. down on top of them, Fum, stripes. Fulm, stripes. As they run through the... No, no, no. You're just like a car.

Start at the beginning. There's rollers, and they just, you push them, and you just roll it in. Just roll. Next cow. But then you can't get the lines blurry, though. They've got to be stripes, you know? Yeah, so each roller is like red, white, whatever colors you want. You know, pattern.

It's white, white, black. Yeah, okay, fine. We'll go there. We'll whatever color there's red, red, white. And blue and yellow in there. Every other is a different color. We don't want flags on the cows. We just want stripes.

It's okay. You push the cow right through. You have like six rollers in each side. You have a striped cow. It's a car wash deal with you. We have to do this. We have to do this. Now will this make any difference on like the Chick-Fillet cow?

Is a Chick-Fillet cow going to be a striped cow or spotted cow? Both. Both. It's about right. It doesn't matter. In today's world, I'm not going to, looks,

I'm not judging. If you want, I'm not judging you push your cattle through the car wash and we're going to stripe them. That's what the deal is, okay?

Oh, I don't like that. What do you mean? You're going to stripe the cows? We're going to stripe them. That's what we're doing. It's what we do. Feel like if I give you the cow, and you want me to strap them?

Does it sound right? It doesn't sound right. Maybe you define the definition of that. All right. So this story, this is something that seems to happen every year. And why does it happen?

because people are dumb. Who stuck a finger there? Criminals are dumb. I mean, let's just be honest. Okay, my crime stories that I have prove the fact. And I should rephrase that. Most criminals. The criminals we hear about are dumb.

Absolutely. The good criminals, of course. We're going to tell you, there are good criminals. And those stories we hear about, which we're going to hear about, there's a good criminal story in this stack right here today. that I'm going to get to. But this particular story,

police responded to a grocery store donation bin. Guy was stuck inside. Oh, no. Yeah. Every year some guy crawls into the donation bin. And he needs pants. Trying to get stuff out of the bin. What kind of donation was it?

And he gets stuck. Was it food or clothing? His clothing. Yeah. So you need your pants. I mean, dude, just hang out. It's going for him anyways. That clothes that they just picked out is little.

going to him. Yes. So he's kind of in the middleman. So now he's just stuck in the bin. Now the freaking cops are going to arrest him. It's sad. Once again, we love cops. Now,

oh no, I probably shouldn't have done this story. Damn it. He died, didn't he? Oh, crap. Okay, so. He suffocate? It appears he was trying to remove items

from the donation bin. He was stealing from the donation bin. We don't know that, allegedly. Right. He was in the bin. He got stuck in the bin. Careful there. Allegedly.

He got stuck in the bin. It appears he was trying. It appears. I like that. I like that. Okay. But he was found hanging out of the donation bin. He wasn't even all the way in.

He was hanging. He got stuck halfway in. Maybe halfway out. I don't know. Maybe he was coming out. You don't know. But they freed him. They freed him.

They freed him and they took him to the hospital. Where he died of his injuries? They didn't make it. But what cost is bad? Was it the slit on his tummy? Did he break some liver and lungs like the little chihuahua did? Like, did he get like lung and thing like the chihuahua? Maybe he was going into the bin to die.

Maybe. Maybe that was his thing. Yeah. I mean, it doesn't necessarily mean that the bin. Hey, Jeffrey Epstein killed himself in a cell. Thank you. This guy could have. Most places now, though, a lot of places don't have bins like that anymore.

No, it's very difficult to find those places. Yeah, they have their own. Because I don't want to deal with people. I just want to give the clothes. Just give me the stupid box. I know, but you got to drop them off at the place. You got to drop them off. Sir, you want a ticket?

No! Oh, yeah, absolutely want a ticket. Oh, you do? Yes. Why? Damn right. That's a tax right off, bro. Okay, $15.

That's not even enough to be worth it. The list is attached to the sheet that they give you. So I'm not saying that your list may be different than what win in the, the bin, but it's possible. It was $15. It's possible some people may have a list of things that went into the bin attached to the donation sheet and it may have not actually been donated. So they're lying on that tax document.

I've heard about it. I've heard about people that. I've heard about people that do that. You allegedly heard about this? Heard about people that do that. Yeah. So that's all I got. I mean, that's all I have.

There's so many good stories that we haven't even got to them. What? Subscribe, rate review. Yes, subscribe to the show. Of course. Of course, if you use Apple or iTunes. Or now you can find us at radio.com. You should rate and review the show.

Of course you do that helps other people find the show. Or you could just go to the blaze.com slash podcast and click on chewing the fat. And then we give you a plethora of places you can subscribe to. to the podcast. I always look forward every day for you the same plethora. That's ridiculous.

I didn't even get to the story about, oh my gosh, the lady, I've had this in the fat pile, the lady who's charged with three counts of lewdness for being topless in front of her stepchildren.

Oh, shut up. Right? Shut up. So her and her husband, her and her husband, who has the kids, I don't even have time for the stupid story. How about we'll do this?

Give me a quick story in 30 seconds, and we'll go. They're working in the house. They get itchy. They take the husband and the mother take off their shirts. The kids see her. The kids go back to stepmom.

They'll go back to their real mom because she is the stepmom and says, hey, mom, dad and stepmom went topless in front of us. The mom complains she gets arrested. This world is gone to hell when you can't be topless in your own home. That's just a quick recap of going topless in your own home. Download and subscribe to more content. tent at the blaze.com slash podcasts. So then Marie Osmond has to pipe up and she calls it pornography. What?

Marie. What did you say? They were itchy? What do you mean they were itchy? They were working in the garage. Okay. Doing construction. I don't know, remodeling the garage or moving stuff around.

But somehow they got itchy? They said the fibers of the dust made them itchy. So they removed their shirts. Well, see, here's your thing. I was helping you move a couple of weeks. ago and it was so hot. I'm so sick of hearing you talk about you helping me. I'm pissed at myself for asking

you to help me right now. I really am. So go ahead with your stupid story, but I want to be clear about something. This is going to be one of the last freaking times I hear about it. I was so hot. Then I wanted to take off my shirt. So I understand. Do you? I understand when you're working hard. Yeah, yeah. And then you get all sweaty and you took off your shirt.

Thank you. That's my. point and had you done that guess what we would have pornography or no it would not have I would have I would have made have given you a hard time oh yeah yeah as as friends

but oh well yeah so now you want the girl to stay itchy if my children walked in to oh shut up see their step on their father putting up drywall naked they weren't naked

they were not naked stop stop they weren't naked Marie Osmond. This is the time where I want you to bog me down with facts, because I want the facts. So let's do this. Let's say that dad takes his shirt off. Okay. And stepmom doesn't take all her clothes off, but leaves a bra.

No, not even, a bra or even a, a spaghetti shirt. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Isn't that really the same thing? Well, it depends. How hot is she? well they obviously were itchy and warm from working so they got all worked up and sweaty okay so they're hot okay then yes it's pornography

I mean come on is it is it you know are you do you walk around shirtless moms in front of their kids I do you know they're your kids yeah but there is a fine line of

step kids because I have to deal with that. So what you're saying is that you leave your shirt on around the stepkids. Yeah. See, that's why I'm kind of, do I think it's ill? Do I think she should be arrested for it? Absolutely not. No.

Is it a dumb thing for her to do? Yes. Yes. Especially if you go topless. And hubby and look, and dad should have said, what are you doing? Put a shirt on. Hey, put those things back in there. Yeah, put a shirt on.

Here's a t-shirt. Shut up. And you know what? And because of that, I'll put one on two. I'll put a shirt back on. And do we know that it wasn't just like she went topless in order to put a new shirt? The kids, right. The kids just said, you know, she was topless in the garage working.

So mom gets all bent out of shape because of the new step mob. She definitely is hotter than this one. Absolutely. She is definitely hotter. Hatter? Younger. Absolutely. Yeah.

Yeah. Everything's perked up. Yeah. Brent's pecking you. You got to see those perfect everything. before I had kids. That's exactly right. So calm down, Marie Osmond, with your pornography.

I do like how you call her by name, too. I like that. You call her by her name? It's agonizing. It really is agonizing. All right. So let's say you're a criminal. See, this is where criminals are dumb.

I'm going to give you a dumb criminal. And a smart criminal. We've got a lot of dumb criminals. a lot of dumb criminals. Like the pet shop owner that was getting robbed, and the owner says the two women were trying to steal some animals. Look at the pictures and read that one line again. The two women?

Okay. I thought the left one was a dude. The left one identifies as a dude, absolutely. Okay, thank you. Thank you. No, the right one, yes. But legally is a woman. That's why she's being called a woman in the story.

But you know, she's pissed at being called a woman in the story. Because I'm not a woman. I'm sorry, Marge? I'm not a woman. She looks like a Marge too. See, news reports, 21-year-old, Isabel Mason. That's got to be the one on the right. And 19-year-old Jamie Pack.

Yeah, that's the one on the left. Although, Isabel. Yeah, you could. Go either way. And she does. Anyway, they were robbing from an animal store. Thank you. rob me from an animal store and they were trying to get the owners trying to get them out

tackle them out of there they started throwing guinea pigs at the oh come on what did they do to you what are you doing guinea pigs are awesome now um some of the guinea pigs are still missing oh no oh no oh no do you got put down to like the dog did no telling if there was fendx drivers around so we don't know what happened or or a clothed donation bit hey g4 that movie g4 it was all about guinea pigs super smart guinea pigs uh Alaska man arrested after drugs found in spoiled goat guts. Now, you think to yourself, spoiled goat guts. Why would you have spoiled goat guts?

Well, apparently, he was traveling using an airline. Who doesn't travel with frozen goat intestines? Jeffrey, that's why TSA came up with that ban last week. Thank you. So it started to smell. and the Coast Guard at the airport and the TSA... Coast Guard, where the heck is this guy at?

Coast Guard investigative, yeah. The state troopers, we're there. I mean, it's at the international airport in Anchorage. Swarm, swarm, swarm. We've got rotten goat guts here. We need the TSA, we need Coast Guard, we need state police, we need everybody.

Everybody. We need them all. Bring the Secret Service. I think this involves a president, too. And look, it's at Anchorage International Airport. It's in Anchorage. Alaska. We finally get to arrest somebody. Bring everybody.

Bring everybody. Somebody's here we're arresting. Bring everyone. Obviously the cat pie park rangers were there too. So they smelled the odor of rotten meat as it thought. What are you doing, dude? What are you doing? See, this is why criminals are dumb.

And they started to, they started, do we invest to look through your stuff? Yeah, go ahead. Go for it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And they started to dig through the frozen meat. Wait, wait, hold on, hold on, hold on. You may. No, we're going to dig through your meat.

No, but you meant the top part. right? No, all of it. We're going to start. Oh, no, then no, you cannot search my bags. Wait, what? You cannot search my bags. I'm sorry, no. You can search the top part. Yeah, you go right ahead. But anything deeper than the second level? No, you can't do that. But I can get a search warrant and do that. Oh, that's fine. You know what? That's fine. But, you know, you don't want to. So then don't move and shut up because we're going to continue to let the meat thaw

while we wait for a search warrant, which is exactly what they did. Because we've got somebody we can arrest and search here. So we're waiting. We've got everyone here. We've got the troopers. We've got the Coast Guard. We've got TSA. We've got the Range Rovers. we got everybody here. The cars? Yes. Yes. Not the park rangers, right?

No. The park rangers took the range rovers. So they resumed the search. Wait, why? How? They got the search warrant. Darn. And they found packages wrapped in plastic that contained 740 grams of marijuana.

That wasn't enough in the goat intestines, 389 grams of methamphetamine. He was placed under a... razz. Why? Wasn't his? I don't even know how they got there. The goat ate them. I just bought the frozen goate them probably. That's all I know. I brought the frozen goby. I don't know what you're talking about. He was smart to stopping the search though. Giving some time to kind of like.

Gotta go to the law man. Yeah. But he knew that something was wrong. Absolutely. Yeah. And I love he probably was like, you're not going to check that far deep. They'll just move some shirts around. Right. Right. Million dollar in diamonds taken during a Maui heist. These are smart. Criminals. Oh, that's a smart criminal. Okay. Insurance company, because they've got them.

They haven't been arrested. Oh, that's why they're smart. Thank you. Oh, okay. They're offering a $50,000 reward to help find the masked man in a full black gown who stole more than $1 million in diamonds at a Hawaii jewelry store. And I don't think anybody should help on that. Let the guy, he escaped.

Oh. He escaped and he's probably in Aruba right now. If you know who this guy is, you say, man, give me $60,000. or I'm turning the end. Oh yeah, I'm asking the criminal for money. Absolutely. He stole a pink diamond value to 240,000. He sold diamond stud earrings value to 378,000

and a platinum fancy light pink diamond value at 450,000. So four items. Good luck, God bless. Four items got them to a million dollars. Dressed up Halloween, we're going to rob the store, we're good. How we talked to Kim Kardashian to make sure that her jewelry is safe. You know, speaking of that with her big jewelry heist.

Remember that was in Paris or London? Yeah. Everybody shut down. Kanye stopped the show. Yep. He left. He flew off. She was in danger.

Right? So not too long ago, I see her and read a story where her is wearing a ring that is like one of the, one of the jewelry that was lost. It was stolen? No, not lost. Stop. Stolen. Stolen. And so I'm thinking, okay.

So it wasn't an insurance heist, right? No, it was stolen, Jeff. I've had copies made. Yeah, of course, Jeffrey. Don't you have copies of all you diamonds and emeralds and rubies? Yeah, I do. Yeah, you're right. You know what?

You're right. And if you have emeralds and jewelrys and diamonds, oh my. And you don't have copies, you're just a... Oh, you're just dumb. You're just dumb.