Chewing the Fat with Jeff Fisher - Ep 274 | Putting a Bow on 2019

Episode Date: December 20, 2019

Studies show that some people have had a better... intimate...experience in 2019. Speaking of... intimacy, Hugh Hefner is not in a better place right now, but his son is in... the air force? Uh, thank you for your service, I guess. Also, who is the most googled female of the year? And which cancelled television shows are we glad we missed and won't have to see again? Finally, Jeffy shares the story of the time he shoplifted a bag of candy from a grocery store (what a criminal!) and the tale of a British man who inadvertently bought a 26-ft inflatable Santa. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

And now a Blaze Media podcast. Welcome to Fat Pile Friday, phone call Friday, and stories that just can't really be real. You know, I mean, I love them. Like the story of the Chinese man that's making the rounds now that's had a seven-inch long glass bottle removed from his rectum. Wrecked him. Ouch. It down there killed him. Ouch.

No, don't give me an ouch. Ouch. Oh, I want a rib shot. I want to get the rim shot and I'll tell you when to play it then I'll tell you when to play the ouch you ready all right

had a glass bottle removed from his rectum rectum it damn near killed him okay now he said that he accidentally inserted it into himself ouch thank you now he went to the doctor

and he told doctors he was trying to use the container to scratch his itchy backside when it slipped into his body all of a sudden. Right. As we come to a close of another year, decade, and this is the, well, this is actually going to be the final chewing the fat of 2019. I wanted to talk to a few people and see how they're holding up

and, you know, what's on their mind as the year comes to a close, as the decade comes to a close, as the decade comes to a close. And Anthony from South Carolina is on the line. Hello, Anthony. How are you, sir? Jeffrey, this is an honor, sir. Oh, the honor is all mine.

How are you? Wow, I'm doing well. I was off at work, off of work, and I saw that we could call live on your live program, so I decided to call it. Excellent, thank you. Chris isn't here to dispute it. Thank you.

I know. It makes it even that much better. Absolutely. Absolutely. Absolutely. So what's on your mind? as we come close to another year. I mean, it hasn't been a good year for you. We're closing the decade out.

You're looking forward to the future, or are you just exhausted? Exhausted, sir. I know. I know. You know, to be honest, when did your first show on the Blaze come out? Because I am shocked

that by the end of the decade, you're not on the top of the list. I know, but that's, you know, thank you for that, and I appreciate it, but I know, I'm not. So it's okay. I'm barely on the list, my friend, it doesn't matter, so it's okay. Well, you're the first one, you're the first live podcast that I listen to every day. Thank you.

Before the Pat one. You know, whatever that guy's name is. Yeah, I know. I barely like him, that's for sure. I like him a lot more than I do, Stu, but I barely like him. So, I really, seriously, are you looking forward to next year? Are you excited about it, or are you just kind of, you really just, I mean, I realize we're exhausted now, but by the time the first of the year rolls around, that exhaustion is going

to hopefully look into maybe being positive, right? Right, well, right. And, you know, the thing that amazes me is how much technology we have and the information that we have constantly 24-7, and that's kind of one of the things that this decade really brought to the forefront. Yes, it has. You know, we don't, we don't ever have to wait for anything. and it shocks me to see newspapers on people's driveways now.

Oh, no kidding. You're already 48 hours behind. Did someone put a yellow piece of trash on my yard? What is it? Oh, wait, that's a garbage. It's a bag with some kind of paper in it. Okay. It's a dead tree, I think.

I don't know. Well, the local papers are actually, you know, they are more trying to sell ads and let you know what's going on in your neighborhood and your local stores and stuff like that. I mean, I kind of, I understand that. I do. Right. And they're trying to make a living.

I get it. I don't blame them. I don't blame them. And that's the only way that you can do that now. But as far as, you know, really newspapers, I mean, hey, it's been a long time since I've actually been in a convenience store, especially since I quit smoking now that I think about it. I mean, I go into a convenience store where you would see, and even when I was still smoking over a year ago, you walk in and you see the rack with newspapers on it. And you're like, what? Wow.

And why? You got to ask yourself why. Why is it there? Is that? I know. I know. Remember when they told us that all the technology and information at our hands would make people smarter? Anyway.

It doesn't seem to have, but we'll roll with it. No, it hasn't. Anthony, thank you so much. I appreciate it. Have, you know, Merry Christmas. Happy New Year, and I appreciate you listening. Thank you. Thank you, sir.

See you. You know, the other thing that's happened in 2019, and I should have asked Anthony about it. A new study out, nearly half of Americans claim they have had the best sex of their life in 2019. Oh, yeah. Pull of 2,000 sexually active Americans. Nearly half, 47% say their sex life was better in 2019 than 2018. Oh, yeah. I mean, take a moment.

Take a moment. And think to yourself, has this year been the best sex life year of my life? Now, I know my answer. It was a year for experimenting as one in six Americans tried phone sex for the very first time. And a further 29% tried using a toy for the first time. Like the guy in China that was an accidentally trying to scratch himself, itch himself. It was an itch.

It was an it's. That's what it was. I was trying to scratch an itch. Uh-huh. Of course, so were these other people. 29% for the first time tried to use some kind of toy. Wow. What does the world come to?

Results found from having that kind of sex, you know, where the bottle was for the Chinese guy. At the very first time, using handcuffs and blindfold. this is turning into an adult conversation. So I'm going to try to, this is some of the study I haven't edited yet for non-adults. So just bear with me.

I may just go for it. I may just go for it. And I know many of you let your kids listen and I love you for that. And so kids, put your headphones on. Go watch the YouTuber that we talked about yesterday that telling you how to unbox toys. Go watch him. Okay.

one in five had sex in their car for the very first time. Wow. One and six role played for the very first time. What are they, what's the age group of their people that they're talking to on this study? Hold on. We got to find out the age group. They talked to two thousand sexually active Americans, but this is, This can't be people of any substance age for any of these things.

You're doing for the first time? 57% say skills in the bedroom have improved over the past 12 months. 52% trying new positions. A quarter of those surveyed had absolutely zero sexual regrets from the past 12 months. Well, that's pretty good, right? 25%. Zero regrets? who doesn't have regrets

man I wish I hadn't have done that I just want to leave I don't want to be here anymore shouldn't have done that 52% saying they and their partners tried new things experimenting

trying new things being honest looking to put a spark back in is what we're supposed to be doing yeah yeah thanks doc when it comes to different positions

58% preferred one position you know like your pets and the other 37% preferred the

regular church position and then 24% wanted to be a cowgirl. And no, they did not want to be Camilla. No, they did not want to be Camilla. 22%. I see in 69.

22nd of the top of the top. All the greats, adventures. This is all that. I mean, it's been a good year. It's been a good year. This is, this is me editing for you. If you can follow me on Twitter at Jeffrey JFR, Facebook, Jeff Fisher Radio, Instagram, Jeff Fisher Radio.

And I will tweet at Facebook a link to this story so that you have an idea of what, 29% and 24% of this. And I'm trying to be a talk. And 79% were happy. So you'll understand exactly where I was editing as we get into the story. of 2019 and nearly half of Americans, according to this study, had the best sex of their life

in the year 2019. Speaking of the best sex of your life in the year 2019, the son of Hugh Hefner. I think of science and Hugh Haffner. I just tie it in there with the Hugh. So Hugh Heffner, of course, passed away in September of 20th. 2017. I mean, I don't get any sad music for Hugh Hefner.

I mean, okay. I mean, Hugh Hefner. The one thing that was wasn't said when Hugh Hefner died. He's in a better place. He's in a better place now. No.

No, he's not. So, sorry. I've got to let you down, but no. It's the one thing that never was. Anyway, his son. His son. His son. Cooper is 28 now. Now, Cooper is, you know, he's got some playboy money still.

There's still some cash. It might be not as much as it used to be. You know, let it run down a little bit. Hugh let it run down a little bit. He lived large and, you know, it's fine. It was his money and his deal. He got to do with it. He's got the daughter running the business

and they tried to change things up with not putting nudes in the magazine. And they realized, boy, That was dumb. And then they went back to put some dudes in the magazine and now Cooper was there, but you know what? And I think Cooper was the one. If I remember one of the documentaries I saw that he lived next door to the Playboy Mansion.

And because Hugh, when he divorced and had the kids, he bought the mansion next door, so his kids would be next door. And they had tunnels and stuff that would bring them over to the mansion. So they were always around. When the parties were there, the kids were always sneak around. They had the animals. You know, you had the damn near a zoo there on the property.

So, I mean, this guy's had a great life, and he's 28 now. And he is now going to be in the Air Force. He joined the United States Air Force and is headed to basic training. Wow. I mean, he inherited $35 million worth of shares. So he's got a little cash? He's got a little money. He was part of the, it was part of the Playboy Enterprises.

I mean, he was the one. He was the one. It talks about it to the story that realized, man, my sister is dumb for taking nudes out of the magazine. We're going to go ahead and put those back in. He was the one that realized was smart enough to do that. that and now he stepped back you know what I'm done

I'm going to join the Air Force I mean on behalf of the country thank you is Chris here all of a sudden and a boys give her the gun

is Chris here all of a sudden I got to hear the Air Force music no I'll tell you one thing though you can get rid please good dear Lord please put them down Um, seriously. Nothing to stop the United States Air Force. Okay.

Uh, he hates the band members. So I know that Chris isn't here because he would be playing that. Uh, he hates the band members. But, so anyway, son has decided that he's going to leave the Playboy Enterprises and he's in the Air Force now at 28. I mean, he's starting to get a little long on the tooth for the airport, or for the Air Force for any military. And he's. he's got all this to look forward to

and now it's just nothing to him he's sad now listen I want to throw this out there this is just you know just me throwing it out there Playboy Enterprises

if you need somebody to help you out while Cooper's gone in the Air Force call me I'm here for you we'll make 2020 the best year ever for Playboy Enterprises that is something that I will promise from the bottom of my heart.

We'll make 2020 the best year ever for Playboy Enterprises, or at least the best year's had in a long time. All right, so I found this story. As long as we're, you know, coming to an end of 2019, headed into 2020, and, you know, this is the last, this is the last chewing the fat for 2019. You can look for, you know, look, I'm going to be, I'll be doing some, you know, some Instagram lives and some Facebook lives and so throughout the holidays.

And, you know, we'll still have some fun. But for the specific, doing the fat shows, you know, we'll be back until after the first of the year. I know I'm doing a couple of Steve Day shows. I'm doing a couple of shows. I might still be doing a couple shows in Tampa. I know I'm doing a Dana last show. You know, so I'm still, I'll still be around. Warm your hearts.

It's okay. Dry your eyes. Still be around. but chewing the fat won't be back until after the first of the year. So, you know, I want to, you know, Merry Christmas, happy New Year, love your family, spread your love, try to get in the spirit of the holidays, love your family. And I'll end the show with my favorite Christmas song, ever.

But I was looking at this list that popped up the 50 most popular women on the web per Google search results from 2010. Now that made me think, well, who the heck is the most searched women of 2019, right? So the top nine of 2019 are pretty, you know, number nine is Shakira. I mean, okay. Number eight is Britney Spears. Oh, yeah, because she's been, you know, whacked out of her brain even more this year.

Miley Cyrus, another whack-up, I mean, another person struggling. I have some star. Number six, Keisha, yeah. Number five, Madonna, they're still Google searching her because they want to know why she can't sell tickets to any of her shows. But she's in love with a 23-year-old, but don't worry about that. Bless her heart for that. I mean, I see.

Bless her heart for that. Number four, Kim Kardashian, yeah. Big news on Kim, too. As long as we're doing entertainment, there's news out there that Kim and Condier may be ready to break up. So, I mean, it might just be news. I don't know, you know, I just report it. I just report it.

We don't have any breaking news from the street on Kim and Kanye or anything like that, but I'm just saying it's just the news that's out there. Kim and Kanye, you know, might be on the rocks. And they're trying to, Kim is trying to figure out how to, how to maneuver through the waters. Number three for this year was Rihanna, Rihanna. Number two was Joanna Cropta.

It's Krupa. I know. Get off me. And number one, searched female of 2019 on Google, Beyonce. Wow. So what were the top 10 in 2010, 10 years ago? Number 10. April of it. Number nine.

Paris Hilton. Number eight, Miley Cyrus, also still Google searching. 10 years later, good for her. Number seven. Oh, these are, well, these are everyone. These are just women. I thought this were women. It says, most shirts women.

And then I've got Justin Bieber. We're counting him as a woman. Okay. You say so. Brittany Spears on the list. Still on this list 10 years later. Holden strong. Rihanna.

Beyonce? Not number one, but still on the list. Madonna, still hanging in there. Keisha. Lady Gaga. Ooh, Lady Gaga was not trending this year. That's tough. Not in the top ten anyway.

I mean, if you look at the top 50 from 2010, man. There's plenty of people still in the news, but they're not really, and they're probably about the same spot that they were. Except for Sarah Palin, no way she's 18th anymore. She's lucky to, she has no way she's in the top 50. No way.

No way. Taylor Swift. was 12th. She's probably close to that now. Shakira was number one this year and 11th. So I mean, she's still working hard to climb the charts.

Jessica Simpson. Yeah, no way. She was 19th. No way she's 19th this year. No way. Although I was always a big fan of Jessica. I remember meeting. I've probably told the story about meeting her before. She did not. She didn't think I was funny.

I thought I was funny. she came with her entourage to the station. She's carrying her little dog around and he's being Jessica Simpson, right? I mean, that's who she is. And I came around the corner and there she is. She's just standing there with her little puppy. I'm like, hey, Jessica, how you doing?

Seriously, stop looking at me like that when you're on TV. It's embarrassing, you're embarrassing yourself, you're embarrassing me. He looked at me like she could not get farther away from me faster. and I just turned around and walked away. It was fantastic. And there's no way she ever remembers that. But I just, I love the idea of seeing the look on her face.

Jessica. Jessica Simpson. Hey, good to see you. Thanks for being here. Please. Stop looking at me like that on TV. You're embarrassing yourself. You're embarrassing me.

Chewing the fat is the name of the podcast. And that's the show that you should subscribe to. Chewing the Fat with yours truly, Jeff Fisher. Just go to the platform of your choice and subscribe. Be a subscriber. It's free for right now. And the easiest way to do that is go to the blaze.com slash podcast, click on Chewing the Fat, and then find the platform of your choice.

Click on it, subscribe. And now you're a subscription freeloader. And that makes you in the 11th. elite of subscribers. Yeah, I know, I know. I know. So,

a thief, and this is part of it, shoplifting is a big deal, especially this time of year. I mean, shoplifting is huge, and with cameras everywhere, it's tough. You know, I don't know if you know this, and I worked in a grocery store for many years in Florida. No, I know. I know it's a surprise. I don't talk about it much.

But shoplifting was a big deal, and you could catch people used to, one of my favorite ways, that one type of shoplifter used to come in. They would come in and they would take the cart and they go down the grocery aisle. They go down the cereal aisle and they take several cereal boxes and they put them in the cart, only they line them up as like a wall

around the outside of the shopping cart, and they drive around and they push around and they put some stuff in the shopping cart that they want, and they go down the meat aisle or whatever, and they put some stuff in there, and then they scroll back around, they scroll back around to the store and then they take out the meat

and stuff it down their pants and they stuff it you know so they're walking out with big hunks of meat and their pants and you know bags of rice no that's not what they're thinking at all at least I don't think so they're thinking that's way

before that they might be thinking about that once they get home with the product but they're not thinking about that in the grocery store so this thief in Riverside California is was viewed at the Vons market in Riverside

who doesn't love Vons Market in Riverside came in the store three times in the span of 15 minutes and he stuffed a total of 30 bags of frozen shrimp down his pants Ouch I mean I don't know that it was it was freaking cold though I'll tell you that

I mean but frozen stuffed out of your pants like that So each time he went to the frozen food section Stuffed the shrimp down his pants And then walked out And walked out of the store And He valued Like 500 bucks

Five hundred bucks where the shrimp Stuffed down this guy's pants And three times So They have the security footage And they're busy Busy looking for him I mean

Back in the day When I worked at the grocery stores for shoplifters. It was way before, you know, digital pictures and any of that. We used to, you know, snap pictures, uh, snap pictures of the, the shoplifters. And we'd give them, you know, trespass warrants so they couldn't come back in. And, uh, it was just, you know, just a strange way of doing things.

But people tried to steal a number of things. And who among us haven't shoplifted before? I remember once. Now, I don't raise your hand like you. I haven't shoplifted. Everybody's taken something from somewhere just to say if they could get away with it. And that's clear. Please.

But I remember once as a little kid getting busted for shoplifting at a store. Guilty, guilty, county, county! I don't know that I ever told this story before. I remember I was in there with my friends and we were, you know, cruising the store and deep pocketing stuff. and then as we go to go out, we get stopped by the store security and they drag us into the back and open to the security office.

Now, I still had a giant bag of M&Ms in my sock. All right. They didn't know that. They made me, you know, I had other stuff in my jacket and stuff, so I gave, turned those in, but I left the bag of M&Ms in my sock. And I sat there at the desk

and listened to them how I'm in, tell me that I couldn't come in shopping with into the store, anymore and I couldn't even come into that store anymore if I came in with my parents. All right. I had to, they weren't going to tell my parents, but I was going to have to tell them if my parents wanted to come to that store because I couldn't come into that store. And I knew that if I were to come into that store with my parents, there's no way they're

saying anything. They may be watching closely if they remembered and if the same security person was working, but there's no way. I mean, I'm sorry. There's just no way. but the whole time I've got this big bag of M&Ms in my sock

and he walked us out and I remember being so happy hopping on my bike and riding away thinking oh yeah and not that kind of oh yeah that I've got still got a bag of M&M

I felt kind of bad about that I thought I want to apologize to that store the store's out of business now and it's probably out of business because of the bag of M&Ms that I took. So I will never let it happen again. I apologize. I do.

I apologize from the bottom of my heart. No, really, I apologize from the bottom of my heart. So I'm looking at this list of television shows coming to an end as we end the 2019 year, and we review some of the things that happened and some of the things that we thought were going to happen, or at least people predicted we're going to have. happened and didn't the last couple days.

You know, a couple of shows are just coming to an end, right? Mr. Robot and The Good Place and Madam Secretary. But some of the shows just get the ax. And I was looking at this list, like some of them, no wonder they got the ax because even I, as a TV aficionado, didn't even remember some of these shows like Pearson. Oh, great, I guess it's a suits spinoff starring Gina Torres. Okay. Good luck, God bless. Lodge 49.

All the previews on Lodge 49. I actually remember like, I got to watch that, but I just never did. The in between, oh yeah, agonizing. That was on NBC. It was agonizing from the beginning. It got some of the lowest ratings ever. Have a nice day.

You know, we're just gone. Grand Hotel. Yeah, agonizing. Spike Lee's, she got to have it. Okay. I mean, that's agonizing. that's agonizing. It was over at Netflix for season two,

and then even Netflix was like, no, we're done. Have a nice day. Take care yourself. The adaptation of the new Murphy Brown, that show was agonizing from the beginning. It was just, I couldn't take it. And they even dragged in Hillary Clinton for the special scene.

It was ridiculous. Remember the Hillary Clinton scene with Murphy? Brown and Hillary Clinton was just horrific. And she walks in off the whole. No, I have to stop now because it was just, I don't want to get too political. But the Murphy Brown episodes, you know, definitely were political.

And they were so good. I know. I know. No, that's enough. I'm stopping. It was just good riddons. The fix? Yeah.

The story of Marsha Clark produced illegal thriller The Fix. You know. okay marsha you know we kind of like you did your o j thing you've been around for a bunch of years but uh good luck god bless last call with carson daily boy what a shame i don't know what we'll do uh

we'll do without that show he was on for 17 years 17 years for that god awful show we are you and i are doing something wrong when that show is on for 17 years and uh it's done fuller house oh no i know i know it's over and that was even that's because

Lori, Lori, Lori, pay my tuition, Lori. You have a nice day. Designated Survivor, year one, great. I'll even give you year two. But after third season and it was trying to go into its fourth season, no, it's over. That was Keith for Sullivan. You know, the premise was great.

It should have been a limited or short series and been done with it. then you have elementary that show was actually on for a while I remember trying to get into that show and it just never was it was seven seasons that show is going to make them all kinds of money in syndication seven years that's what you need man

you get seven years you're knocking out some syndication money and the show is just eh just eh and you had ransom oh CBS that even went three seasons

And it was still, eh. The Ranch on Netflix, there's a show that everyone ran and raved about. And I did my very best to try to get into that show. No, couldn't do it. The new 90210, What's Her Face, really tried to make that work because she's broke, man. Tori Spelling. She's broke, spent all of Daddy's money, lived large like a queen for years. Daddy died and the money dried up.

And now so she tried to make some more money, then good luck. God bless her and hubby or living in Hawaii or something. It's just agonizing. Modern family. Wow, modern family 11th season, 11th and final season. Good for them. There's another show. I mean, syndication for that show is huge.

The Good Place, that stopped. You know, my wife, I'm forced to watch that show. The Good Place, because she kind of likes it. And what's her face in it? She's in a lot of stuff. Yeah, Christian Bell. She's in The Good Place. She's busy, man.

She's done a lot of stuff. Remember Veronica? She's still doing Veronica Mars, which is, I mean, that's, that show's got 70, 80 episodes now. The Good Place was, you know, 50-some episodes. I mean, for her, that's huge. She's in another TV series that's getting started now called Do Ray Me. All right. Good luck.

God bless. but she's a busy actress. She does a lot of... She's working a lot, man. Love that. Show up. Learn your lines. Last Man Standing with Tim Allen. I feel bad.

I don't even know what that show is. I feel bad on NBC. What is that? A freshman comedy that aired earlier this year on NBC. It aired 13 episodes. Didn't gain any traction. That's because it sucked. Add in the mediocre reviews.

Nobody knew when it was on, and it's over. Have a nice day. The kids are all right. Goodbye. The cool kids, goodbye. Have a nice day. Proven innocent. How many seasons is proven innocent?

I tried to get into that show, and the premise is kind of good, but it just didn't quite have it on Fox. How many, is that just one season for Proven Innocent? Yeah, it was just one season. Wow. I mean, I really kind of tried to get into that, and it just didn't quite have it.

Smill, Santa Clara Aria to Diet. Santa Clara Aida Diet's been around for a while. Yeah, third season, yeah. Lethal weapon, no, stop it. You're not going to, you know, everyone knows that. I'm not going to do that. There's plenty of shows saying about, look, we are in great times on content and television shows,

or at least shows, whether you want to, you know, call them television shows. But we have so many places creating great content for shows. shows. The problem is, is that all these networks still have to provide content that a lot of times not good. It's just fill content. So if you can just do content that's good, then that will help you. What a novel concept. You mean like the Blaze? You know, one of the things that's coming, and it's already kind of here, you know, I mean, we have the, we have the, our smartphones and our fit bits and, you know, we have all our health watches and our health phones and we're able to do things, you know, through the, through our computer systems. You know, in Madison, Wisconsin, at the University of Wisconsin and Madison, two scientists have created a smart toilet that's going to be.

become, you know, a tool to monitor your health. And, you know, they're going to do it for your safety and health to start because it will give you early signs of, you know, cancer, diabetes, and when you have health, things going wrong. But really, inside the story of their study, they talk about, you know, they did 10 days of their samples and they did unveiled, according to them an evolving snapshot of their day-to-day health. And we think a lot, this idea of personalized medicine. By looking at people's urine, you can really get a nice picture of what's in the blood. And we can find out how much alcohol, coffee, how much over-the-counter medication, what they need.

So that's where we're at. It's not going to be so much. I mean, this is going to be insurance companies are going to mandate, health insurance companies are going to mandate you have the smart toilet, man. It is coming. It is coming. We're going to find out that we want to know everything we can about you. Now, you don't have to have it. Did I say mandate? I meant they're going to strongly suggest because you don't have to. You don't have to. You're just going to, well, you're going to pay a lot more if you don't. But you don't have to. We don't have to know everything we possibly can about what's going on with your health and what medication and pills and food and drink that you're putting

into your body, how much you're running, how much you're walking, how much you're sleeping, how much you're awake, how many times you're actually urinating during the day? You don't have to do that. We don't have to know that. But we're going to charge you so much money if you don't. If you don't, it just won't be worth it. Sounds like you're in trouble. Somebody should have flushed.

that joke right down the toilet. Oh, thank you. I don't want to sound mean. I know it's the holidays and, you know, it's, you know, we're supposed to be in a good mood and giving and helping people, but did I mention I was in Louisville, Kentucky? Oh, the other day, and I lost a gold bar.

I gave the Salvation Army a couple of some change coming out of the store, and then I got home and I realized, what did I do with that gold bar I had in my pocket? Oh, I didn't accidentally drop that in the Salvation Army's kettle, did I?

Now, is it me to me to think that Salvation Army, if I go there, I say, you know, I didn't mean to give you the gold bar. I just want it back. I mean, how nice is that? A gold bar, about $1,500 worth, was among the donations in one of the kettles outside a store in Louisville, Kentucky at a Kroger store. That's, I mean, that is proof that America still wants to give and help people, no question. Now, I know people get a little upset with the Salvation Army,

and they're out there ringing their bells, and they've got their buckets and stuff, but it works. It works, and they're helping people. And guess what? It doesn't matter whether, what kind of person they are, or what kind of sex, or what kind of sex they want to have, or what kind of sex they think they are. They still help everyone.

It's a wonderful thing. but hey, I digress. Anyway, they were all happy that they got the $1,500 gold bar at Salvation Army. Kind of cool. And what I like most about it, I think, is that it was just put in the bucket. It wasn't some guy taking a picture saying, I'm giving my gold bar to the Salvation Army so that he could get credit for it. I mean, that's the way you're supposed to give, right?

And it's a matter of what the, and it doesn't matter really what the Salvation Army does with it, although it does to that person. Like when you give, I always had the argument of giving money to homeless people, well, they're just going to go get a beer with it. So I'm giving my money to them because I feel better about giving them money and I want to help them.

What they do with it is what they do with it. I don't care. I can't do anything about that. That's fine. I still want them to have the money. And I don't want to have, you know, there was a story the other day about a, People who were giving a waitress money, they went in,

and each person at the table gave the waitress $100. I don't have it in front of me. But they made her open the envelope in front of them, and they made a big deal about it, and they interviewed her. I mean, that was all about them. That wasn't about giving. It was all about them. And look how good we are for giving.

It wasn't about trying to help someone. And that's kind of sad. That's kind of sad. And didn't we call it? We called it. It's going to have... You knew it was going to happen, and it's kind of agonizing, but the United States of America pageants is being sued now by a beauty queen that goes by the name of Anita Green.

Now, Anita Green is biologically male and transgender because... He believes that she. Well, he was denied, he was denied a chance to compete in Miss Oregon pageant because of his sex. Now, he's claiming discrimination. He's attempting to force the pageant to change the rules and is still seeking money. It's about giving minorities a voice, green claims. Is it? I believe I'm beautiful.

And I want to set an example for all women, cisgender and transgender. Beauty doesn't have to fit into specific molds. Well, no, it doesn't. And you can still set an example just not in this beauty pageant. You have to actually be a female to be in this beauty pageant. Okay, baby? The eligibility requirements, you've got to be between 13 and 17 years of age. a U.S. citizen or permanent residency.

I mean, that's almost bad in itself right there. Works or goes to school in the state they are competing. Natural born female has never posed nude in film or print media. Is single, not married, has never been married, and has never given birth. gosh, the hatred of the United States of America pageants. I mean, it's coming. We're not, there's just going to be higgly-pigley, throw it out there.

It's not going to matter. You're not going to be able to know who's male, who's female, what's that. This is going to be, it's just a pageant of who looks the best and who's the smartest. And it's just start your own pageant. Anita, start your own pageant. the America transgender beauty pageant do that

but that won't be good enough will it no because you've got to infiltrate everything so if you haven't got your Christmas decorations up you probably aren't going to put any up right now is the time don't try to just jerry rig a couple of bushes out front with a you know a couple of strands of lights

thinking oh just that's my Christmas decorations just it's better off that you don't do anything because the other neighbors that have done massive amount of of Christmas lights are all going to look at you going. Holy cow, what a loser. I mean, it just looks sad. Somebody needs to tell them, take them down.

But the big thing now is, you know, the inflatables. Everybody's got the inflatables. And some of them are cute. And it's nice. And they got the little yard inflatables and the little Santa in the sleigh, Santa in the pickup truck. And you got the little reindeer and the little snowmen. In fact, I may even have a couple of the snowmen and Santa.

Santa's in the, you know, we've got so much Christmas stuff. And I haven't done, I haven't put any outdoor decorations or anything this year. So I'm good. Okay. Good. Yeah, that's right. I'm good. And I'm just the house in the neighborhood that's dark.

All right? No problem. Because there's plenty of houses that went all out in my new neighborhood, man. They definitely went all out. So the new guy doesn't have any lights. That's right. I don't. But there's a story about a guy.

in the United Kingdom that wanted to get a little inflatable Santa because he's got a new baby and he thought it would be fun and it would be fun to get an inflatable Santa from front of the house so hopped on eBay and he figured he'd spent about 100 bucks got a little eight foot inflatable Santa and he's good to go. So the box comes

and he thinks to himself, well it's looks a little bit of, little bit bigger than, you know, a little eight foot Santa. But, uh, take a look at it, get it out, spread it out, start putting some air in it. Yeah, except, uh, it wasn't eight feet. It was 26 feet. It was eight meters. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. Giant business Santa Claus in front of his house.

and he lives in. Look, there's nothing bad about where he lives, but it's just a small little two-story home. You've seen him in, you know, you're familiar with the United Kingdom. A lot of neighborhoods are, you know, the houses are connected and they're just double houses too high. They're all together, and that's where he lives, right? He's got a little driveway there and it comes up. He's got this giant 24-6 Santa Claus right in front of the house. It's fantastic. When you think to yourself, you wouldn't want to do this, but when you see it, you think,

Yeah, I want to do that. He had to bring the neighbors in, and they've tied it down. Now they had five of his neighbors rope it down. And he talks about it getting windy, and it was trying to start to blow away because it was so big. So now he's just the crazy neighbor with the 26-foot Santa. I love that. In fact, I mean, I want like three of these in front of my house now. There's three giant 26 feet Santa.

That'd be kind of cool. Maybe you have more than three. Maybe you have a couple around the side, a couple around the front, and that's all you have is these 26-foot Santa's. Now, that, my friends, would be kind of cool, except you take some serious, you need some serious power to inflate those bad boys, man. You've got to have the generators running 24-7 to keep those boys up.

Put some air in it makes sure the air keeps going. The inflatable is all keep... You got to run out and turn the engine back on, blow them back up. And up they go, then... there's always that was falling down in the yard you got to go turn the thing out again so you end up just leaving the just leaving it run just put them out there you tie it down you turn it on the machine and you know you walk outside your house and all you hear is and it's just the machines keeping the air in these damn inflatables the whole neighborhood at night so I mean if you had a few of those around the house you'd be running some serious generator power but it would be fun to have like five 5 25-foot Santa's all around your house. Nothing. Nothing, my friends, says Merry Christmas

from chewing the fat to you. Then 5 25-foot Santas. Download and subscribe to more content at the blaze.com slash podcasts. All right, since this is the last show, the last Chewing the Fat for 2019, and we're heading into Christmas and the holidays, I did want to say thank you. Thanks to all of you that have listened to chewing the fat this year.

And if you're new to chewing the fat, thank you too. And if you're listening and you haven't become a subscriber, I mean, make my Christmas. All right, make my Christmas and subscribe. So go to the blaze.com slash podcast and click on Chewing the fat and subscribe to whatever platform warms the little cocklems. of your heart for the holidays, okay? But I did want to wish you Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year, and I hope you enjoy your family and your friends and make everything, I hope everything works out the way you want it to work out.

Live your American dream. That's the one thing that I want this show to be, I want you to know that I believe that you should live your American dream. Not somebody else's. Live yours. and I wanted to leave you with my favorite holiday song from the CD Believe and it is David Osmond along with Clyde Bowden and it's O'Come All You Faithful. And I listen to this song year round yet it means a lot more this time of year.

So just enjoy it and have a Merry Christmas. And thanks for listening to Chewing the Fat. Oh, God. So good. Merry Christmas. And much love from Chewing the Fat.