Chewing the Fat with Jeff Fisher - Ep. 68 | Is Your Pig Getting Too Fat?

Episode Date: December 21, 2018

Jeffy tries to end the year by going thru his fat pile... and a new business adventure starts. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome to it. Two in the Fat with yours truly Jeff Fisher. Thank you so much for coming along for the ride today on the first day of winter. It doesn't feel like it, though. It feels like winter's been around for a little while, but today is technically the first day of winter. We have Ruth Bader Ginsburg. I know I don't know a lot of politics on the show, but she just had cancer surgery. Ruth Bader Ginsburg.

She's 85. For those of you going, who? You know, the Supreme Court Justice, Ruth Bader Ginsburg. she fell not too long ago and crapped some ribs and when she went to the hospital they realized that she had some out of the ordinary happenings going on in her lungs and so they did a biopsy today and got rid of them and you know I guess she's fine

she's 85 and if you want to know how the the people who hate Donald Trump felt today when they heard the news of Ruth Bader Ginsburg having cancer surgery? Oh, man. That was. It was,

she's nowhere close to being dead, but they certainly felt like it. That's for sure. I mean, the head was hanging low on all the people that hate Donald Trump because if RBG goes, he gets another shot at the Supreme Court. Oh, it would be the end of,

times. And I did like the new name tag that the press is giving Megan Markle over at the, you know, the Queens. Little girl, she's the new, the new royal. She's

being called Duchess Difficult. Ice. I like that. If I'm the Duchess, I am liking that. All right. This story got it takes me. So less than a month into a new job, this guy, Paul McCowns, goes to a bank in Brooklyn, Ohio. He wants to cash his first paycheck. But now this is the headline.

Instead of getting his money, he found himself in handcuffs after bank employees called the police. Well, before we even get into the story, let's be clear. in today's world, it's very difficult to walk into a bank and just cash a check. You have to have a, if you don't have an account there, you better, you have to create one. Or, I mean, it's, it's, or you have to have someone that has an account with you or the check has to be from an account member. I mean, it's a, there's some fine lines of getting checks cash. And if you have an account, a lot of times, if it's the first time you received a check from that company, it goes in, to your account and it takes a it takes an extra day or so for them to process it because they have

to make sure that it's a real check we've all been through that all of us and believe me i think it's agonizing and i'm all for people being angry about it and i'm all for how the banks rip you off on charging you fees in your checking account i got it but this story you think okay well, okay, what's the big deal? Well, according to this story, it's just the latest incident in a steadily growing list of black people who have been subjected to 911 calls.

Okay. So McGowan's a new employee at an electric company visited the local bank, and he wasn't a regular customer, and he was asked to present two forms of identification, as well as a fingerprint, and he readily offered all three. employees were suspicious of the $1,000 check.

They made calls to his employer that went unanswered. The bank said, you know what, we're not going to cash the check for you. And then they decided that, you know, the check might be, he might be trying, it might be a fraudulent check. We're going to call the police. And so he got pulled over. The police got him out of his car, handcuffed him, put him in the back of the cruiser, contacted the man's employer

and the man's employer said yeah he works for me he just started yes the payroll company pays him that much then he was released they took the handcuffs off got him out of the back of the car

and off his little merry way he went now then he goes to another branch and cashed the check okay well hey I wouldn't have gone to that same bank if I was him I'd have been done. Now, get this.

According to the Brooklyn Police Chief, there have been close to a dozen cases of police being called out to that Huntington Bank branch since July, all of which resulted in arrests for fraudulent checks. The bank spokesperson confirmed this, saying the bank employees called police were being vigilant. they all this is something that's been ongoing at their branch so it wasn't just a it wasn't just a random oh it's just a black guy we're going to call the police but that's how he sees it of course now mcgowns went on to say that it's also an example of the struggles of

black bank patrons um no uh you're trying to uh you know grab on to the cases that happened against Wells Fargo because this lady tried to refuse that Wells Fargo accused of refusing to cash this lady's check and they accused her of fraud

over a hundred dollar check, $140 check. That was in July. And for himself, he says that he wants an apology from the bank. and for a change in how the bank handles customers who don't have Huntington accounts. You know what that change is going to be?

We don't cash checks. You don't have an account? We don't cash your check. That's the change you're going to get. Thank you for that. He watched the person who made the phone call, that manager, that teller, whoever made the phone call, I feel as though they were judging. Yeah, they were.

That's what they do. You were there, you wanted to cash a check. They questioned the check since they had cases in recent past that were all fraudulent. They couldn't get a hold of your employer. Then they decided that you're another fraudulent case. Obviously, you were not. And in the end, it all worked out. Have you opened up a bank account?

So you can cash your checks or you're just going to continue to go through this? I mean, sometimes it's something that we all go through. It's not just racial profiling. It's not just living while black. It just isn't. I remember a while ago when, first of all, welcome to Fat Pile Friday. Chewing the fat, yours truly, Jeff Fisher. Thank you.

I mean, I appreciate it. We're coming up. My gosh, this is the end. end of 2018. We're going to be 2019, 2019 company and right around the corner. And I'm going to do, I'm going to post a few things over the holidays

and remind you of some past interviews over the holidays and you can keep an eye out for some newer things. And those of you that subscribe, you'll get alerts when those are posted. If you don't subscribe, subscribe, rate review. Please.

Subscribe. you rate 20 stars you review it best podcast ever you and I are good and if you feel the urge if you have time if you're at a red light share it with a friend if you don't have time

just rate and review it and then when you have time share it with a friend but we got Christmas we got New Year's we got college bowl games I'm so happy college football is back at least for the next couple weeks I miss watching college football

I miss football season I know the NFL is up, but I like college. So anyway, it's Fat Pile Friday, and we're going to try to blast through some fat here today, but good luck. Good luck. But remember when e-cigarette maker was going to eliminate their social media accounts and stop retail sales of flavors, the Jules account, and the plan came response to the U.S. Food and Drug Administration,

September announcement, it would investigate the major e-cigarette makers and review their sales and marketing practices. And you thought then, oh boy, goodbye to Jules. Have a nice day. Not so fast. Not so fast. The Marlboro Maker Altria Group with a jewel deal

just had invested $12.8 billion in the Jule labs. all right it's been rumored for weeks and they wanted to you know obviously expand their portfolio outside of cigarettes for a while the real kicker is the valuation the deal gives Jewel

$38 billion dollars Pinterest is worth $15 billion SpaceX is worth $30.5 billion Airbnb is worth $31 billion did I mention that Jewel gives a valuation of $38 billion

dollars. Now, the cool thing about the jewel, you know, they have a shelf space and access to a retail footprint of about 230,000 stores. Plus, if you worked for Jewel today, one of the 1,500 employees, they're getting about a $1.3 million bonus. Did I mention that I worked for Jules. I've been working quietly off the books for Jules. Somebody needs to let them know that they have 1,5001 employees. How sweet is that? Pretty sweet. Pretty sweet. And it's weird. I don't know how they're going to do it with the bonuses

because there was a story this week sometime that's in the pile somewhere about the, oh, here it is, about the Michigan company that's giving their employees big bonuses. they're doing a total of $4 million in bonuses to their employees. But they can't give it all at once, which is, it's based on longevity. They have about 200 employees. It depends on how long you've been with the company. But the average is probably going to get $50,000 to $20,000.

And if you've been with me longer, you're going to get about $60,000 plus $1,000. Okay, and there's a lot of, you know, everybody's really happy. happy, but they said that they had to break it up and give it to the employees differently. Like you get some money now and then you're going to get some money next year. And then some of it's going to go to your retirement fund because of the way the government has a set up. So that kind of stinks. In fact, it more than kind of stinks.

personally, I think it's racial profiling. I think that's what it is. No? No, it's just government profiling? Pastards. Well, since we're speaking to Michigan, I might as well go to Green Bay. It's right across the water.

It's right there. Investigators say 61-year-old Wisconsin man was arrested for tearing down a neighbor's Christmas decorations. And you think, well, you might be able to understand that. You know, they're bright, they're annoying, they're blinking. But not only did he knock him down and tear him down, but he did it while he was drunk and naked. That's a little scary in Green Bay.

It gets cold up there, bro. We're talking about some serious shrinkage going on when you're tearing apart the Christmas lights. I said he was naked kicking her door, tearing down her decorations. He had a blood level of 0.21. That's not bad. It's only twice the legal.

It's not bad. He didn't have any attorneys and he was just stumbling around. He needed to take care of... Officer said the Green Bay man was stumbling around and told officers he needed to take care of supposed drug dealers in a neighbor's apartment. Oh. So the neighbor is housing some drug dealers and he couldn't take it anymore.

Or he was looking to get his fix. And it didn't matter whether he was drunk and naked. I'm tearing down your lights if I can't get my fix. Even in Green Bay. My God. What is this world coming to? I was tearing to the fat pile here. I've got a couple of, I've got a, where should we go?

We've got the fat pile of some stories that aren't tagged that are just some headlines of stuff that I really like. And we've got the fat pile under the Post-it note, sex. All right, we'll go to sex after these. All right, we'll go to sex We'll see what sex is. Hold on. But I've got some great stories I wanted to get to other than the sex. What's better than sex? I don't know.

These stories here. What's better than sex? How about this woman who allegedly killed and cooked her lover but claims that he attacked her first? How about that story? Is that better than sex? That's better than sex, yes. She's accused of killing and cooking her boyfriend.

Medium rare or rare? He attacked her before she stabbed him. In connection with the death of her love, oh, this was her lover, they were seven years together. That's a long time. I mean, seven years. You figure you know somebody after seven years a little bit, right? Officials lost investigation out of the man who's reported missing.

After searching the suspect's home police found a human tooth in the blender. I mean, that's a good rule of thumb right there. Ooh, bad choice of rules. Not really a rule of thumb. It would be a rule of tooth. Oh, man. I am. So, the man asked her to go on a trip.

She didn't want to go. She argued over the matter. Upon seeing his blood, the woman said she panicked. Oh, here we go. She claimed he insulted her, slapped her across the face, and then pulled her hair down towards a table, bringing a knife into her line of vision. That's what she stabbed him in the chest.

Hey, look, there's a knife. Stab. How many times? Who among us can't say that? How many times you see it? Oh, there's a knife. I'm going to stab somebody. Upon seeing his blood,

have you seen the show this center on Netflix? Jessica Beal, Bill Pullman. Really, I recommend it. It's a big guy show, though. Be ready for it. Speaking of stabbing someone, though. because the first episode I mean this could be a spoiler alert

for the center so it's a USA Network show but it's up on Netflix now it's like seven or eight episodes pretty good but in the very first episode if I tell what happens does that count as a spoiler alert yeah it's the whole it's what the show is based on how long has it been out

okay so the first episode you can tell she's with the family she's got a kid husband she's working with the family business But you can tell that she's unhappy. Oh, then go ahead. She's befuddle. Yeah, you're fine. And so then they go to the beach for the day, and she's on the beach.

And she goes, takes a long swim, and you can tell that she's really struggling. She goes way out, way past the barriers. You think, oh, my gosh, she's thinking about killing herself. And it looks like she's going to drown. She doesn't. She swims back. And then she's sitting on the beach feeding her kid, and these group, these two couples are on the beach, She had the blanket up in front of them.

And they start making out and playing music. And she hears the music and she starts freaking out. She tells them to turn it down. And she runs up with the guy because she was peeling an orange or an apple for her kid. Might have been a pair. She was peeling some piece of fruit for a kid. And she just runs up and stabs the guy like seven times. And there he is on the beach laying there, believe it.

It's tremendous. I mean, it's great. I know I told you it's a big guy show. And those of you listening thinking, did Jeff just say that stabbing someone to death was great? The scene was great. The scene was representative of stabbing someone seven times and watching them bleed to death. It didn't really happen. It's just a show.

It's not real life. Back to the story. Oh, yeah, she had the knife come into her vision. She stabbed him in the chest and watched him hemorrhage. Upon seeing his blood, she panicked and sliced his body into the same. three pieces. Who among us? How many times? The head, the torso, and the lower

half. She then boiled him in an attempt to separate his flesh of the bow. That's not funny. And I'm laughing because I think who thinks like that? Really? Come on. Who thinks like that? He didn't return for the next few days and they

finally started saying, hey, what happened to homie? Started searching around. Is that a tooth in the blender? or were you just grinding up some bones? Thank you. I know. I almost went there, too. Did you say that on the air?

Oh, you should have, because I almost went there. Is that a tooth of the blend there? You just happy to see it. Are you happy to see me? So stupid. I always went there, and I thought that doesn't really work. It does work, though.

It does. But who thinks like that? Really, the reason I'm laughing at it, who thinks like, oh. Now, right, the beating that she's taking from the guy, the abuse is her word. Yes, it is. Yes, we don't know that. We don't know that.

So we do know that a knife came into her line of vision and she stabbed him to death. Yes. And then cut him up, cooked them, tried to blend up some stuff. Need a better blunder. The moral of that story is, get a better blunder. All right, so we're going to stay in the sex pile

or we're going to go to the other pile? Other pile. I'm kind of interested. That's the story now. I'm scared that that's the highest you could go. Could be. Possible. Okay, you just run with it. All right.

Ants in Florida collect skulls of other ants to decorate their nests. Huh? Come on now. Come on. Yes. Scientists are taking a closer look at the species of ant in Florida that decorates its nest with skulls of other ants that it's killed. What pile is this? murder? How to murder? How not to murder?

Stories I picked up along the way. It's been in a fat pile. I've been in a fat pile. I just haven't gotten to them. You know, I feel like we've been really bad to these audience because these are fantastic stories that we left for the last broadcast of this week. Like, what is going on? It was just they were in the pile. I finally went through and dug through. I'm looking at the fat pile right here. You know, sometimes you get too much fat. You can't move around. You've got to finally not. The fat pile has lost a little weight. You start feeling a little bit better, and you start finding stories about ants that are decorating their nests with skulls from other.

I love this. It's not their own either. Right? Their own aren't dying and then they're just setting up skulls. No, they bury those. They're setting up skulls of those bastards from Ant Hill 24 over there. Those ants, they have the hill over there by the palm tree? No.

I see another one of those over here. He's dead, too. I told him stay away. the Florida ant for Micah Archibaldi. Maybe we get the computer to say it for us, so we pronounce it correctly. I know you're busy reading what. Flight plans for the holidays has been subject.

This particular ant has been subject from study for more than 60 years. They've been watching this ant for 60 years. This ant can be killing humans. Their habitat is restricted to the southeastern U.S. mainly found in Florida and parts of Alabama and Georgia. So three states. Three states these sons of guns are in. Upon its discovery,

experts suit notices nests were full of decapitated heads of trapjaw ants. So at first, the researchers thought, maybe the ants moved into the former trapjaw nesting site. But no. Time lapse footage showed what happened next. The Florida ant sprayed the trapjaw ant, with formic acid to immobilize it. Freshly killed creatures are then dragged into the nest and dismembered.

And then they leave the skulls there. And the species, they refuse piles of their nests. I mean, these ants could take over the world. Remember the other ants, right? The other ants that we talked about that are the zombie ants, right? And the zombie bees. And the zombie bees, right? And now we've got these.

We've got these that are spraying you. We've got these, we've got these ants. The formica, what is it? Form maker arcbow would be. That's what I said. What was it? For maker arcbow would be. Yeah, that's what I said.

We got those ants. And they spray you, you are immobilized, and they kill you, break you apart, and they put your skulls by the door. Just to remind the other ants, no. Wait, can't have doors? Yeah, yeah, they do. Yeah, they're the little swinging doors, like the little bars that come in and out. Oh, the old Western ones?

Yeah. Yeah. I had those at a house I lived in once. Going into the kitchen, you know, the swinging doors like that. My kids loved them. My wife hated them. Which wife? My wife hated them.

I just, we'll just go with my wife. The current one. Just go with my wife. I, it was actually her. because I don't think she could see over him. She is short. Yeah, we're a height impaired. Move on, move on, move on, move on.

Absolutely move on. Next story. Are we saying to this pile? Yeah, this pile. Yeah, this pile next story. Visitor from the ocean's twilight zone. Between the ocean's bright blue surface and its blackest depths. Yeah, no, I don't like it.

Don't like it. Local park rangers. Now we're going to sex. We're going to the sex pile. We have sex music? Yeah. Do you like it? It's okay.

It was all right. It's okay. Well, you don't hear it? I hear fine. John Mayer. This story's been in the stack forever. It's an old story now. I actually remember the story from a long time ago.

I don't even know why I never got to it. But he was asked about, he was in an interview with Kazi David for his unofficial Instagram story series, current mood. How come we don't have a unofficial Instagram story series? What kind of producer are you?

Make that happen. Instagram needs a sponsor a show. Okay. I'll get on it. Chewing the fad with Jeff Fisher or Jeff Fisher after dark on Instagram. Ooh. You can't use that.

I've already got that tagged. Don't use that if you're listening. You can't use that. Stop it. We could just edit it out, but we're too dumb. the uh oh see got his feelings hurt now we're not too dumb we just left it in so you'd laugh with us okay chris really could have edited it out he's not that dumb you okay now she's his feelings hurt so bad listen i know you've got to you've got to order the plate ticket quick otherwise the

site just goes down you got to re-plug everything in so go ahead and finish it up okay so he was being questioned and talked about to John Mayer and he's Mr. Ladies guy, right? Mr. Mr. Everybody's everybody, everybody, anybody that's anybody in Hollywood has done John Mayor. And by done, I mean done with

John Mayor. Now, later they got into they want to know how many women he's actually been with. And Cassie instructed Mayor to blink if he'd slept with more than 800 women. When he maintained a stare, she asked him to do

same it was more than 500 he still didn't blink so he it's under 500 according to this interview i mean that's sad news for him right i mean john mayor mr mr hollywood mr if anybody that's anybody has slip with john mayor and he's less than 500 that's i would not admit that i john you should have blinked right away man more than 800 blinked who's saying a note to that. Everyone would have said, yeah, yeah, that's fine. Now, maybe it was a joke. Maybe he was just joking around. Like, oh,

you know, course is less than 500. But I doubt it. All right, the sex pile. What is this sex? Could breast, oh, no, I don't I can't do that story. We could do breastfeeding story. Breastfeeding for better or worse. What happened? Breastfeeding. What's that?

I'm back. About the place. Okay. He said breastfeeding? I did. I did. Give me more. What's that?

Give me more information. Well, this lady is just talking about how old her kid is and she's still breastfeeding them. Oh, let me guess. Nine. This lady is talking about she breastfed their four-year-old and six-year-old, and one who said the plan was to continue until her daughter was 10. Oh man, people get all wound up about that man. All wound up.

And, you know, I think rightfully so. I mean, at some point, the biological age, according to Texas A&M research, is two and a half to seven years old. And seven is almost, I mean, seven has pushed it because my wife, my wife now. Careful. She breastfed my daughter, my youngest. That's just, you know, it's the last thing I have in my mind. That's the only thing I remember is that she brushed fed bio. But you get to a point where, and it's beautiful.

And I mean this with every ounce of love in my heart. It is beautiful. And I was happy that they did it. And darn the luck, when you breastfeed, you don't have to get up in the middle of the night to feed the child because the mother has to. I know. I know. Yeah, I know. There was no, they didn't sell them.

Really? Yeah. Minas like 12. Now they got recalled. Yeah, when I, when Mayo was a little baby breastfeeding, they recalled all the breast pumps. All of them. It was bad. It was bad.

It was a breast pump recall worldwide. Wow. Yeah, it was bad. So, I don't know what's, I couldn't help. Wish I could, though. But the average is 4.3 years. Okay, hold on. Hold on.

4.3 shut up. Hey, when they do that. Well, because what happens is, see, the babies, as they get bigger, then they start growing teeth. And as they get bigger and they're running around and they start becoming more active, it's like, okay, get out of here. We're going to feed you like a regular kid. That's what happened with Milo. As soon as you got teeth, my ex-wife stopped. Yeah.

Yeah. And that's pretty average. And I don't remember the age, but that's, you know, I'm sure that that's 2.2 between, 2.2.2.2.2. 3.4 or whatever the points are. But I was really sick of people being in trouble for breastfeeding in public because that's just dumb. Of course, you can breastfeed your child wherever you want to. You should have some common sense and cover yourself. But if you don't, you don't.

I don't care. Just don't, you know, we shouldn't make a big deal about it. We should just, someone in your life other than people you don't know should let you know. you know, your breastfeeding is really good and all, but you ought to cover yourself up. That's your family's responsibility, not mine. But if you don't cover yourself up, I don't care. I mean, it's just polite society as you cover up. Well, when you start getting into kids, remember the cover of the magazine and the mom is standing up

and the kid is on a stool and he's standing up with the breastfeeding with mom and stuff, and they're bigger? I don't know, it just seems wrong. I guess if you want to do it, fine. I guess, I don't know. It just seems, it feels wrong to me. You know, it's like even in the animal kingdom, after a while, the mom is like, you know what, we're done.

We're done. Have a nice day. And I don't think it's, it's way before. 10. All right, we still got to get through some of this fat pile. It's Friday before the holiday break. I will be posting, you know, a few things over the holidays. So keep an eye out for those.

If you subscribe, you'll see the alerts. Keep an eye on. But for the most part, we're wrapped up for the year until the first of the year. We're back on the second. You're back on the second. Yeah, I know. The people who actually count will be back. Oh, baby.

Do not say that because you know with one button, I could shut this. Essential employees will be back on the second. Okay. Oh, that's fine. You know what? Yes, that's fine. I don't want to be essential because I'm the first one out the door until budgets. Think about that.

That's fine. That's fine. Is it? Yeah, absolutely. Is it? Absolutely. Yeah. See if you park, I guess, posted.

So we, let's say you essential employee, fat man. The, I mean, I've got. Just read the head. Headlines. Here we go. Let's do this. Read the headlines. If it's important enough, we go to it. If it's not, we move on. All right. I want to read that headline last because I know it will be important enough. All right. Middle School reduces bad behavior dramatically with reverse suspensions and invite parents to school when students misbehaved now. That's pretty cool. I like that. Kansas recalls hundreds of license plates containing inadvertent ethnic. You know, I love license plates.

Me too. And if you follow me on Instagram, Joe. Fisher Radio. And I sometimes share it to Facebook at the time. I take pictures of license plates all the time. I love them. And I have people now all over the country. And I mean this.

And I thank you for it. I mean it. But it makes me laugh because I have people all over the country now sending me license of plates going, hey, think of it. You know, even Chris Cruz. Yeah. When he's, you know, when he decides that he's just one of the ordinary people and not going to fly and drives around.

It's tough to take pictures of license. He's played in airplanes. I'm getting pictures from him. I'm getting pictures from my cousins. I'm getting pictures from my daughter-in-law is sending me pictures. And my son doesn't do any of the, I mean, very little social media. I mean, it's, you know, he does it for his work, but like to be on Instagram to look and something, he doesn't do that. It's stupid.

I know. We had him checked a long time ago. He can't help him. He's being hit on the head a lot. He has. He has. The damage is terminal. Permanent?

Oh, Terminal. No, it's terminal. Oh, wow. He's forever dumb. Really? Yeah. Look, I love him, but he's forever dumb. But she'll be taking pictures of a license plate, and he was, what are you doing that for?

I've got to send him to your dad. For what? Hell did he do that for? Shut up. That's what she told them. That's what I told them to. But the states have had a problem, though, because they screw up a lot of times and print license plates that have... Ass man.

I have things that, you know, that people get mad at. See, I'm okay with that. Oh, I love that. Really, I'm okay with any of it. Yeah, me too. Yeah. I don't care. If you don't like it, turn it in.

Tell me on a new plate. They'll give you a plate. You say, yeah, I want a license plate. They'll give you a license plate. And it says, I ask me, turn it in if you don't like it. You should be proud of that. Absolutely. But you don't get, you got to pay for those.

And it's pretty expensive. Like $300 bucks? Yeah, they're pretty expensive. That rolls around every year, man. They digging out that every year. My good friend, Jack Harris in Tampa. has his license plate is I talk to you, the number two you. I love it.

He's had that forever. I hate him for that. As a matter of fact, I don't even want him to be my friend anymore because of that license plate. I'll be in Tampa, so. Yeah, good for you. Oh, okay. Good for you.

I was going to tell you, like, maybe I could steal it and then bring it to you. I want Jack to have his license. Oh, never mind then. You can keep your license plate. You know what? I want you to steal Jack Harris's license. We're going to talk about it on the air. so when he comes out and it's gone

he knows that I have it and I'm going to take a picture of it and say hey somebody mailed this to me and it definitely wasn't Chris Cruz well you can't throw me under the bus like that I'm just saying it definitely wasn't you oh okay okay okay even though you admitted that you were going to take it it definitely wasn't you it was somebody else that mailed it to me

that did he make it in the podcast got thank you thank you this part we're not dumb enough to get we're not too dumb to get rid of the gonorrhea prevention Glaxo vaccine may offer STI, STD help. Well, good for you. We need all the help we can get for STDs.

Nearly 200 flash frozen sea turtles have washed ashore. Ooh, this was the end of November. This was almost a month ago. Wow, that fat from there? Nearly 200 flash frozen sea turtles have washed ashore in Massachusetts. That's sad. Global warming. They all washed ashore.

Global warming. They've died off Massachusetts coast. It is global warming. Of course, there's no other reason. No. No, global warming makes turtles freeze to death. So, wait, FDA, controversy approval. Look at that pot.

You're not even hitting, like, it still looks fat. 9,000. Here's a, here's a thing. You don't want to tell people that they look fat. Because I mean that they look fat. I mean that they look fat. We know, we got it. We know we look fat.

But you don't want to be reminded. See, I've been fat-shamed on this network for a long time. Oh, wow, yeah. Long time of this network. By everybody. You know, I'm aware. Yeah, like, even new hosts that come in, guests, you know, they just fat shamed me all day long. It's very embarrassing.

Thank you. But seriously, can you, like, say more so we could get rid of that pile? We do not want to go. We do not want to welcome the new year with all that fat. Can we at least burn some calories burning that fat? We do not want to welcome the new year with, Hey, here's some fat from 2018. We don't want to do that.

We don't want to do that. Rapper suing makers of the Fortnite dance. Fortnite over the dance. We have that. We have two rappers suing them. We also have... That stupid kid with the floss. Yes.

Shut up. And, oh, that was good. And we figured out that he was not the first one to do it. It was the Mormons. Thank you. The Mormons gave us the gift of the floss. Dear Fortnite. Thank you.

you're welcome we've busted the case wide open for you if you're going to give anybody cash you look fortnight's got you know 18 billion dollars they're doing so good yeah and so they've got okay here's some money go away and so by the way that latest dance on player number three the way that player dances uh-huh when you're getting ready to pick them uh-huh yeah i thought of that that was yours yeah that was my player three yeah wow i invented that dance uh 15 years ago. Oh, wow. Yeah, it was called the fat slide.

Ooh. Yeah. Can you show me? Show me, show me, show me. Well, you've seen the game. No, I have, but I want you to show me. That's exactly what it is. Yeah, but I want you to show me.

Oh, okay. I'm going to show you what. Okay. Don't push me. I'm not pushing you. Trust me. I'm not your monkey. Trust me.

Oh, trust me. I'm not pushing you. I'm not. Trust me. See what I mean about the fast champion? See, I'm not sure a little wind-up monkey. But I am. yours because you just and as well you should be that's what producers are that's what their job is

to be the wound the wind up little monkey that's what their job is massively overweight pig oh here we go fed cookies and donuts by the owner where's pita well they're pissed oh they're a pita oh that's a pita uh a fireman uh or franklin owners bought a two-year-old pop belly in 2016 they thought they were getting a mini pig. Uh-uh. She grew up to the point where they could no longer keep her and had to surrender the pig to the farm. Oh.

Now they're feeding her, you know, meat and vegetables, but... It's a pig. That's what I'm saying. It feeds... By the way, peas will eat anything. Yes, they will. Even human. Even teeth.

Yes. She got tremendous... That's what you need to get. If you can't get a new blender, get a pig. That's a new model. by the way. She got tremendously fat because she was fed

too much of the wrong foods. Shut up. It's a pig. Thank you. It's supposed to be fat. It's supposed to be fat. And then once you do, you cook them up and that bacon tastes delicious.

Thank you. So she had no opportunity to exercise or express normal pig behaviors. No more pig behavior is... Ruting and wallowing. What is that? Ruding and wallowing. That's where they root around in the dirt

and they wallow in the mud. You know what? I've learned from my wife. that that's not how you give a definition. By using the word in the definition, it's not giving the definition. I just told you what it is. But you didn't.

Yes, I did. I did. That's called, it's called rooting in the, you root around. You see my hand moving. That's his nose. This is supposed to be his nose.

My hand, okay? I'm only by now. Those of you are listening that my hand is up in the air with my fingers pointing down. So that's the pig nose. And then I'm moving it around. You know.

Oh Okay, got it. That's called rooting around. It's rooting around. Okay, okay. Digging up dirt. What's the other one? Wallowing.

Wallowing. Ging me with a hand. Wallowing. Wallowing is they just, you know, they have mud and they just gl. But hold on. I thought this pig was fat. Can he do that while he's fat?

Because that's the same. Yeah, that's the same feeling that I do when I eat a whole Oreo. Thing of cookies. All right. That's a pig. That's a whaling. Maybe you couldn't lay down though because the pig.

It looks a little shaky because maybe the pig realized if I lay down I'm never getting up. So we cannot stress enough if someone tells you they're selling mini pigs who will stay small their entire lives. They're not telling you the truth. Dun dun dun. Now, according to the MSPCA, Amy, the two fat pig the two fatted pig who was given

wrong foods had no opportunity to exercise or express normal pig behaviors she's depressed due to her size no I know she actually okay I got news for you

MSPCA this is not because she was depressed she's depressed due to her size and refused to move for days that's not depression that's not depression that's sitting down going i don't i'm not getting up i do that every day i'm not getting up have you seen my 600 pound life oh yeah i mean yeah and it's a gradual thing it's a gradual thing have i not talked about it's a gradual thing with fat people

before yeah i mean episode but number pick a number fat people talk somebody on the phone or is that is that Is that your alert telling you your ticket is paid for and you're good to go? Yes, it was. She's now on a strict diet and does piggy aerobics. Stop it. Stop. Hold on. Hold on.

Business idea. The Jeffie and Chris Cruz piggy aerobics here in Dallas, Texas. Is your pig eating too much candy and cookies and donuts? We'll now bring it to Dallas, Fort Worth, where Jeffrey and Chris will do some piggy aerobics. Piggy aerobics. Do not. Pig too fat. Doesn't root, doesn't wallow,

just lays there and snorts. It's time for piggy aerobics. There it is. I love it. I love it. That's on Tuesdays and Wednesdays though. Now, it seems like a dumb question. Okay.

Too fat? Because most people are going to say, no, my pig is not too fat. We'll be the judge. Yeah, we need to know. We need to know. Pig too fat. Pita's sending you letters.

Yeah, piggy aerobics. We'll take care of it. Piggy aerobics. And trust me, look, pigs don't know this, but they'll feel so much better. It will. Yeah. You know, of course, in the beginning, you don't feel good about it. You think it's not going to help.

But in the end, piggy aerobics will help your pig feel more comfortable, more at ease. more like a real pig. If you think we're joking around, trust me, Cam Anders can vouch for us. Yes. And if you haven't downloaded his latest podcast, I want you to download it because we have some sad news. Some of the animals do not make it during the winter.

What? Yeah. We lost some chickens. We keep them in the coop? Yeah, but we lost some. Too cold. We put some straw in the coop or something? He'll heat it up a little?

So download Cam Eddows. You got to make sure put a blanket over the freaking building or something. 40 acres and a full. I was listening to it this morning. I almost cried. He's the guy that's feeding the pigs, Oreos. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.

But he also said they're not getting pigs for next year. They're not? No, they're not. Oops. Spoiler alert. That's on the podcast. Oh, no. Because he told us last time that we talked that he had, oh, yeah, was the pig,

the first pig that they got that his wife couldn't kill. Yeah. They took it to the, yeah. Maybe that was a big part. He didn't tell us that on the air. That was something else he sent me in a private email. Never mind. Sorry, Cam.

Don't worry about it. I will take all this side of the podcast. It's all gone. It's all gone. If it's still in the podcast, eh, pig too fat, won't root,

won't wallow, just wants Oreos. Hi, Jeff Fisher here for piggy aerobics. Bring your pig on down. I gotta think of a great line, a good dance line for pigs, pig lines. Move, move your pig. Look at your, we'll make your big move. Do they squeal?

Do they, what do, what? When they can take care. Because I know one time I made a big squeal, I pulled the tail. You sure that was the pig? That's time to go. I'm getting whacked out of any hero. Well, that story. That story you put to the side.

Let's end the year with that story. Come on. End the year with that one. Go. The weird and outrageous request from visitors on the controversial sex island trip. Ooh. This is the island that you want to go to, right? Who and I never said anything of the kind.

The drug and prostitute fueled sex island is a brainchild of five hard partying friends in the 30s and 40s. He sort of think of themselves as Robin Hood. Nice. They frequently host these sex parties. Come on, man. But the island that they have, they got in trouble the last time because they were having these big parties

and it wasn't a private island. Was that this one house on the island? And they were like, no, we don't want you here anymore. Private parties run throughout the year. Sex Island is designed for every man who could drop $8,400 on a golden ticket. Sorry. $8,400 bucks on a golden ticket to a private island in the Caribbean with unlimited booze, food, women ready.

And drugs, right? Any of the hour of the day. No, there's no drugs. No drugs are illegal. Oh, okay. While there are drugs. Finish the story. Well, there are drugs.

Finish the story before you correct me. No, there's no drugs. Drugs are illegal. While there are drugs. I knew there were drugs, okay? But I think you got to pay a little extra for that. I know it says unlimited booze and food and stuff, but they're not, they're not giving it. For $8,400, I expect everything for free.

No. Yeah. For a weekend, no. Jeffrey, are you kidding me? That's two days. No, you know, I'm not putting up a party for a weekend and providing the drugs. Yes. No.

Oh, boy, I'm not going to your island. Bummer. Well, there are drugs galore on a four-day. So? head of PR Tony said that does not directly provide any illegal substances

but rather acts as a middleman between are you kidding of me dealers and guests see you get it's extra that's such a PR move so they had the private island off the coast of Cardi Annian in Colombia

but in Colombia was like no we don't want you here so they had to find a new place Puerto Rico is open Now they have a place. Puerto Rico's open. You got a lot of room.

Oh, stop. So they've got, I mean, for 8,400 bucks, and they have these parties all over the world, but this particular weekend, the four-day weekend for 8400 bucks is, you know, an all-inclusive. Events with their own, now they have exclusive. Oh, my gosh, what is this?

How much? What am I paying for this event? Hold on. The Private Island Lux Hotel has become a de facto home, home base for Good Girl Company, Sex Island's parent company. Over the past year, they've hosted roughly a dozen private events, ranging from Bachelor parties to a boys' weekend for a group from Saudi Arabia. Tony said... Again, Tony's back?

Tony's the only one that speaks. Wow, that's pretty good. And the first time it mentioned him, he says, the PR goes by Tony. so that's not his real name. Ah. Events with events come with their own exclusive price tag. So I have to pay more?

Ranging from 14,000 to 20,000 per person depending on the size of the group. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. So I'm already giving you $8,400. No, this is separate parties. But I have to give you more? 8400 is for another four-day weekend. I feel like this is a scam.

They just want my money. Not all the private events go off without a hitch during one of the parties and the client became enamored with a particular girl. Uh-oh. That's a big problem. Yeah. It's Amy. Tony said.

And this Tony guys. He's everywhere. I love Tony now. Tony said the men came to a resolution when an amorous client gave the girl 14,000 and threw 7,000 out for his buddy. Wow. But the sex island, the big sex. Island private event just for guys.

That's the $8,400. But it's extra for the... That's booze. $8,400 gets you on the island. Gets you the booze. That's the golden ticket. It gets you the unlimited booze,

food, and women. These people are out of control. Out of control. My wife did ask me what I wanted for Christmas, though. No? You can't... She can't ask for this? I don't think this is what she met.

This is not a Christmas gift. Maybe I'll just leave this sitting out on the table. Yes, there you go. Don't ask for it. Just sit on the table? Yes. Under the tree, maybe. I just sit it out.

What's that? I don't know. It's a story I fell out of my briefcase. I guarantee you with everything, every ounce of my 800,000-pound body. Oh, you're not some weight. Thank you. That my wife. If my wife is not forking over $8,400 for me to go on us.

If I got $8,400 to go on the sex weekend, that would be my $8,400 to be the last weekend away from home. What happened to dad? He left. Guaranteed. All right, have a good weekend. I'm out. Okay, that's fat pile. That's pretty much.

I mean, we got this still a little flab. How much are we have for next year? How much we have for next year? A little flab? That's not much. That's not bad. Look, we'll go to, this next week,

we'll go to a dock and we'll get a little, little liposuction. It's like a little bit more of this fat off. And then we'll come back and we'll be fine. Okay. We'll be fine. Because you go, you know, once you get liposuction, we'll be fine.

And we'll get, maybe we'll get a, maybe we'll get a face peel. Get a face peel for the holidays. And a tan. A good face peel, a tan, maybe a little collagen in the lips, right? Maybe a little butt implant, just for fun. Anything on the upstairs area? What kind of freak are you?