Chewing the Fat with Jeff Fisher - Humanely?… | 1/18/23

Episode Date: January 18, 2023

Netflix looking for a flight attendant… Porn music on the BBC… Meth at the library… Go back to Crack / Boozie… TikTok Banned at UT… [e-mail]  … www.blazetv.com/jeffy… Promo code: Jeffy Ant-Man & Black Panther headed to China... Year of the Rabbit… Madonna headed out on the road… Who Died Today: Lucile Randon 118… Grizzley bears with Bird Flu… Monkey Whisperer has license revoked… Monkey trucking company shut down… Dallas Zoo update?… Headlines: Oldest Runestones found… Vikings Valhalla… Disney Board fight… Microsoft layoffs... Tinder subscriptions… Last day of this year…  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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And now, chewing the fat with Jeff Fisher. Well, if you're looking for a new gig, I've got one for you. Netflix is looking for a new flight attendant to join its dream crew. Yes, the streaming giant is hiring a primary flight attendant for one of its super mid-sized private jets based out of San Jose, California, near their Las Gatos headquarters. In addition, though, I mean, this, look, it's not. going to be an easy job. Okay.

You're going to have to perform pre-flight cabin inspections. You're going to have to conduct safety briefings. And you're going to be responsible for maintaining the stock room. I know. I know. I expect a lot out of you.

You're also going to be required to work flights on the Gulfstream G5 as needed. So the candidates are going to be required to demonstrate a professional representation of Netflix aviation at all times. while performing the duties of the position. The applicant should embrace Netflix culture

and be able to operate with little direction and a lot of self-motivation. So just make sure you know what people like that usually fly on the planes and make sure that it is well-stocked before takeoff. Okay. Of course, Netflix aviation is confidential air transportation. So you should do your job with,

discretion. That means shut your face. Now, they claim they're not giving a price, a compensation, but according to market value, anywhere between $60,000, I'm not doing the flight attendant job for Netflix for $60,000. And they claim that the upper pay is $385,000. Yeah, I'll do it for that. So maybe, you know, this time around your new hire, we get you in for $300,000 a year. No problem. Oh, I forgot to mention. look, it's going to be a varied work schedule, including domestic and international travel, weekends and holidays, extended travel periods, and you're going to have to be able to lift and carry up to 30 pounds.

I keep adding things on what you're going to have to do. It's amazing, but if you want the job, it's what you're going to have to do. Now, they have 30 offices around the globe. Things are tough for Netflix. They've got offices in Madrid, Seoul, Tokyo. Mexico City and London. So, you know, aside from the United States of America. So Netflix, if you want to gig, you can be their flight attendant on their private jet.

That's, you know, good luck. I hope you get the job. I'm willing to do that job, to be honest. That would be a nice gig. but I'm probably not qualified. I know. That whole thing about discretion and keeping my mouth shut

kind of ruins it for me. Welcome! Welcome to Chewing the Fat. So how could you turn away from the BBC when they were doing a wrap-up of a soccer game, their show with Lanker and Shearer,

and all of a sudden, they had all kinds of porno noises going on behind them all kinds of sex sounds going on behind them and it went on for about 10 minutes they couldn't stop it they didn't know where it was coming from

the whole time they're just on the show trying to figure out hey where is this sound coming from we've an F8 Cup we've an F8 Cup winners only policy in the studio and I don't know who's making that noise

But so Alan Sherry's on the commentary alongside Steve Bauer. And whatever, 10 minutes. I'm not turning away. I am not turning away. That is still happening. I know what about the children? What about them?

Come on. I mean, they don't even what they're listening to. What's that noise? I don't know. I don't know. Go play. So apparently it was a prank phone that had the porn sound effects on it

as a ringtone. And this Jarvis, known as Jarvo 69, and BMW Jarvo on social media, began calling it on the live stream of the FA Cup coverage. So apparently he had hidden the phone back behind this portion of the set. And once the broadcast was done, the announcer Lanarker said he found the tail, They found the phone taped to the back of the set. As sabotage goes, it was quite amusing. And so the guy, the video guy, posted a video of him stashing the phone.

And then he recorded him continuing to call the phone when these guys were on the air. So he kept calling the phone for, you know, 10 minutes, more than 10 minutes, until it stopped answering. And then he was like, oh, they found it. So it was a bit. I don't know what happens to someone, uh, to the old YouTuber Giro 69, but,

uh, you know, keep an eye on your sets. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha,

so the next time you're watching a live TV show, uh, just know that it's live. You know, BBC 1 is doing their, uh, doing their shows live because this guy's got his, uh,

got his, uh, got his ringtone set to, uh, just, he just kept calling it. so that the porn sounds would continue on the air. It's funny stuff.

Funny stuff. I'm sure the BBC does not think that. So if you go to the library, if you're one of the people that use the library, and I used to love libraries, and you come home and you have an itchy throat to runny nose, bloodshot eyes, you could have secondary exposure to meth.

Now they believe that it should be fine, and it shouldn't cause long-term chronic health problems. But, you know, just beware. A second library in Colorado has been closed down because of a methamphetamine contamination. Officials in this Denver suburb of Englewood shut down the city library last week within a couple of hours of getting test results

showing that the contamination in the facility's restrooms exceeded state thresholds. I'm not sure what those state. thresholds are but countertops tested positive for lower levels of the drug and so they have a require a specialized cleaning and uh we got to clean everything and plus uh you know we don't know what we're going to do as far as the tainted services the walls the duck work the exhaust fan equipment i don't know maybe you just don't let people smoke meth in the library maybe it's just me you know whatever So I know that they closed down another library in Colorado not too long ago because of a meth contamination.

So now they're concerned about, you know, hey, should we let everyone into the library? How do we keep them clean? Remember they were having overdoses all through the, you know, the mid-2-10s with the opioid crisis. and they made sure all the libraries had Narcan, and, you know, they were able to, you know, help people that were having overdoses in the library. I don't know, maybe you treat it like a gas station. And anybody can use the bathroom, but you've got to get the key.

And you put a big board on that bad boy. And if the person does not, you know, does not have a library card, appears to be intoxicated with some sort of substance, you tell them to go someplace else. Maybe you do that. Or maybe you put a separate outhouse inside the library back in the corner for the meth addicts. Can we use the bathroom?

Sure. You can use that one over there. Maybe you keep the bathrooms cleaner. Maybe you clean them up. Maybe you hire somebody to come in and, you know, clean up the place a little bit. I know Colorado is saying, hey, hey, hey, our strict state rules for cleaning up math once. testing reveals it. The standards are, you know, acceptable,

and they were developed with an eye toward homes where frequent exposure is more likely. So you should be fine in a public setting. We're just going out of our way to protect, you know, infants and children from exposure. So just beware of that when you go to the library. If you happen to come home with an itchy throat, a runny nose, bloodshot eyes.

You know, it's not COVID. It's just meth. Now, I will say that while we have meth at libraries, we have a fentanyl issue in America, no question about it. And I see where rapper Boozy, you know, boozy badaz is the real name Torrance Ivy Hatch that goes by Boozy Badaz, B-A-Z,

or simply Boosie, the American rapper. And he was with the, you know, concentration camp and he's a hip-hop star. He was filmed. That was, I saw it on Twitter. I don't know if it was for his Instagram or his Twitter account,

but it was from Boosie Badaz. And he was telling people that perhaps, just food for thought, boozy was really, really high here. It looked like he was just smoking. He had a big, he had a big blonde with him,

a big cigar marijuana stick. And he was in the middle of smoking it. And he was filming his thoughts. And he was reminding people that maybe, maybe you ought to go back to crack. Hey, shake this out. Too many people dying. in 2020, if you're going to be an addict,

you might need to go back to crack. Crack heads live longer than anybody. You still see them around. That's fend all the way stronger. If you can't shake it, go back to crack. You're going to be funnier. You're going to live longer. Food for thought.

Food for thought. Think about it. That's all I'm saying. If you're going to be an addict, go back to crack. I mean, it's food for thought. That's just words for boozy. If you're going to be an addict, go back to crack. All right, let's go to the break room.

I need something cold to drink desperately. So I see where the University of Texas at Austin, one of the largest public universities in the nation, has banned TikTok from its Wi-Fi and across its wired networks. Wow. So the university is complying

with the Texas Governor Greg Abbott's recent decision to forbid state employees from having the app on government-issued devices. How about the students aren't state employees? Anyway, and it's just the latest major

U.S. campus to confine its students to Instagram Reel. Huh. Public universities in at least five states, including Auburn University, which is in Alabama, the University of Montana, which is in Montana, and schools in the university system of Georgia have banned the TikTok app. Pretty incredible. Man, that's now, look, students are going to access their TikTok accounts through their own data plans and their personal Wi-Fi access, right? I mean, that's still going to happen. But the university had a lot of things going for it on their university TikTok channels, right? I mean, the mascots and the professors and some of their sororities were using the app to hype recruitment. I mean, TikTok is a pretty big deal.

I mean, according to this, and I would venture to say that it's probably, more, but according to Pew, 67% of 13 to 17-year-olds have used the platform, making it the second most popular app behind YouTube. But we've talked about it before that YouTube is, or I mean that TikTok is a, you know, wholly owned subsidiary of China. And, you know, we shouldn't be using it. But, man, that ship has really sailed. So now we need to hope. that we can contain as much as we can and keep as much as we can here in the United States. And I don't know if that's possible or not. So be sure to follow me on Twitter at Jeffrey JFR.

Facebook and Instagram is Jeff Fisher Radio. YouTube is Chewing the Fat with Jeff Fisher. You can always email the show Chewing the Fat at the Blaze.com. I do not have a TikTok, although I have fought with my household for quite some time. about TikTok and lost that battle. So, you know, and I watch some of that. I get hooked into some of the TikToks. I talk to you about, you know,

wanting to start my own AMSR channel. It'll be, I mean, there's thousands of, thousands of people watching these stupid channels. And, I mean, it's incredible. And TikTok has their own, their own channels where they're selling stones. It's just amazing how that, how that system works.

So, I mean, I'm fascinated by it as well now, but I do not have my own TikTok channel yet, but I could. Still, maybe possible. But until then, at Jeffrey JFR on Twitter, Jeff Fisher Radio on Facebook and Instagram. Did I mention that I'm on cameo at Jeffey JFR

and that you can order a cameo from me, whether you want it to be nice or mean, I'll do what you request. That's not free, but, you know, I'll do it. Okay, so at Jeffrey JFR on Cameo as well. Speaking of China, I see where Black Panther and At-Antman sequels get February releases in China. Yay! The first Marvel movies to be released in China since 2019. Yay.

So, I guess Beijing has lifted its de facto ban on Marvel. And so the tent polls releasing both in February. It's the Chinese New Year coming up. I mean, at the end of the week, we have the Chinese New Year, right? It's what is it? It's not a year of the pig. It's a year of the rabbit. Year of the rabbit.

It's not even year of the cat from Al Stewart. It's year of the rabbit. So that means the most recent years of the rabbit because every 12 years you get a new animal. So, well, I mean, the year of the rabbit occurs every 12 years. And so the year of the rabbit symbolizes longevity, positivity, auspiciousness, woodiness, cautiousness, cleverness, deafness, and self-protection. Yay!

The new year brings new fortunes. And in 2023, people can expect prosperity. Hope and calm. I don't feel like that's... I feel like that's not true. But that's what this person is saying. So, because of the rabbit's characteristics, we can expect relaxation,

fluidity, quietness, and contemplation. Oh, that's so sweet. So there you go. Yay! Yay for China. Yay. Speaking of yay, Madonna has announced the Celebration Tour, the Celebration Tour, a 35-city global tour beginning in July that will cover.

her full catalog of over 40 years of music. Madonna. Yes, the greatest hits tour. 40th anniversary of a breakout single, holiday. Yay. So the 35 date celebration tour will see her return to arenas and stadiums. Yeah, remember she did the theater thing with Madam X and had to cancel and it was, you know, was more like the acoustic version of Madonna.

But now we get, and she canceled the last part of it. She canceled the last part of the Madame X tour because, I don't know, she had something wrong with her hip and her knee. She had to go back to the nursing home. But now we get the 35 city tour, global tour of Madonna.

So aren't you excited? I know. Me too. I mean, she's going to be all over the world, right? I mean, she's going to kick it off in Vancouver. Then she's got New York, Barcelona, Paris, Stockholm, wrapping up in Amsterdam. She's only has one date for London, but apparently, according, if you look at the schedule, she's got a week off there, so she's hoping to maybe add a show or two while she's in London,

depending on how ticket sales go. And ticket sales go on sale this coming Friday, the 20th of January, 2023, with pre-sales for fan club members. Starting, it's already up. You can get them right now. If you're a fan club member, you can get your tickets right now.

So, congratulations. Congratulations. You can get your tickets right now. I mean, look, her other concerts have been huge. Even the stupid Madame X tour was still huge. And where she's made a big resurgence is something we just got done talking about TikTok. She's made some big resurgence there saying that her music has been all over TikTok the last year. So she's making a big, I mean, the younger audiences finding out who she is. so Madonna, the icon back on tour Four decades of Madonna, the celebration tour. Yay! With Amex Platinum, $400 in annual credits for travel and dining means you not only satisfy your travel bug, but your taste buds too. That's the powerful backing of Amex.

Conditions apply. So who died today? Who died today? Sister André from France, the nun, born Lucille Randon. She was born in 1904. She had turned 118 years old. She's dead now. Rest and peace. She didn't make it to 119.

I know, sad. Because we lost the, what's her face from Japan, who was 119. We lost her back in April. So now we've lost Lucille Randon, the nun, French nun, at 118 years of age. So that leaves us with Maria Brannas Moray. from Spain. She is 115 years old, almost 116 years old. We have another person from Japan, Fusha Tasimi,

115 years old. And she is, with 115 years, 268 days, the lady from Spain is 115 years, 320 days. So she's a 1050 years, 320 days. So she's a tad bit older than Japan. And then it goes way down to 114 days, 114 years, 347 days. And then you're down to these young whippersnappers of 114 years, 240 days, 114 years, 214 years, 12 days.

I mean, you're down there. Those are just young spry. Young spry chickens. We're talking about the old ones. So Lucille, Roe. Brandon is who died today at 118 years of age. Rest in peace. Also, not really under who died today, but I guess I could do it.

I just don't know how old they were. They were three young grizzly bears that have been euthanized in Montana. All three bears were observed in poor condition, showed signs of disorientation and partial blindness, among other neurological issues. And this is the first time that this virus that they claim these bears were sick with had, you know, been seen in grizzly bears. They had contracted or been infected with bird flu. So now bird flu is not only killing birds and affecting what we eat in the price of our eggs.

now bird flu is affecting our bears. And so if your grizzly bear is seen wandering around disorientation and running into things, partial blindness, it probably has bird flu and needs to be put down. So that's what they did in Montana. They went ahead and put them down. And what are you going to do?

What are you going to do? Say, hey, you're here, little bear. Let's try to fix you up. So I guess there's been previous reports of black and brown bears getting infected with the bird flu, but not grizzlies. Not grizzlies. So I don't know. I guess we've got a real bird flu issue. Fox and skunk has tested positive for the virus.

Raccoons and coyotes are catching it across the country. I mean, I'm not a fan. I'm not a fan of bird flu. According to the CDC, more than 57 million poultry across the U.S. were infected with the virus as of January 11th. Today is the 18th of January, 2023, for those of you listening live, you know, the vast majority of those birds have been killed. They keep saying the human risk is low, the human risk is low,

but now we're all kinds of animals are getting bird flu. so the crossover effect is, you know, happening soon enough. So the bird flu is happening. So if you get fevers, coughing, nausea, abdominal pain, vomiting, diarrhea, eye infection, difficulty breathing, you know, it could be math at the library, or it could be bird flu. I mean, see your local physician. as we're talking about animals, we might as well get into monkeys, my favorite animals.

Those are not animals, okay? Those are primates. Okay, you got it. The U.S. Department of Agriculture has officially terminated the exotic animal dealer Jim Hammond's Animal Welfare Act license. So the monkey whisperer,

the guy that sold Chris Brown is monkey, the monkey dealer, out of Florida has now been shut down. He can't do it legally. Now, you know, he cannot exploit vulnerable animals. Oh, what am I working for PETA now? Yes, yes, I am. So he's got five years probation,

more than $90,000 in fines, and now they're taking his way of life away from him. So good. Good for him. Because, I mean, good for him. you too because all the monkeys are going to be safer now that he's not around but we're going to find him we're going to make sure he's on probation and we're going to take his livelihood away from him good good good that's awesome and remember the trucking company that had the crash that led to the

monkeys escaping in Pennsylvania last year yeah the crash happened I mean it was just almost a year ago. The tractor trailer collided with the dump truck and 100 monkeys were being transported. Now they claim only four escaped. Okay. All right. All right. Pennsylvania State Police searched and found the monkeys who were later

euthanized. Humanely. Yeah, we didn't just we didn't, we just didn't put a bullet to their head. Although I'm not opposed to that. Humans first. Now, I don't know if there was anything wrong with these monkeys. They were on their way to

testing site, right? So I don't know if they had any, you know, any disease in them when they were, you know, out free from this crash. But of course, we caught them all and we euthanize them humanely. So I don't know if that just means we gave them a shot and let them doze off into death or if we called, we put a silencer on our gun or maybe not even a silencer. You don't put a silence or on a gun that's too much you just call them up here here little capoosha monkey come here little caboosea monkey come here all right where's the other one come here bring him over here come here little monkey it's okay we know you broke out of the crash it wasn't your fault come here where's the other two get him over here i mean to me that's humane i'm sure pita would think different

Anyway, the transport company, the Quibito's transport, that is the trucking company, that has now shut down, according to PETA. So don't get in a crash. Don't haul monkeys are getting a crash. Otherwise, you get shut down. And as long as we're, you know, talking about animals and updates and shutting down companies and keeping companies open, what are we doing with the Dallas Zoo? We have not got an update on what happened with the clouded leopard. know that the cage was tampered with and the clouded leopard got out. We know that another cage was tampered with.

I mean, are the cameras broken? Is there some kind of a, you know, a Jeffrey Epstein thing where the cameras are broken? There's some kind of Paul Pelosi thing where the cameras aren't working when they need to be working. What's happening? Why have we not got an update? What are we doing about the person or persons attempting to set an animal? at the Dallas Zoo.

We have not gotten an update on that. And I, for one, I'm a little upset. Boarding for flight 246 to Toronto is delayed 50 minutes. What? Sounds like Ojo time. Play Ojo? Great idea.

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Please play responsibly. Concern by your gambling or that if someone close you, call 18665331-2-6000 or visit Comex Ontario.C.A. All right, just a few stories to get you through the day. Some headlines. Archaeologists in Norway said that they have found a run stone. I think that's run run-estone. Rune-A-S-T-O-N-E.

Rune-stone. Yeah, that's what I said. Roonstone. Rune-stone. Thank you. They claim to be the world's oldest Saying the inscriptions are up to 2,000 years old And date back to the earliest days

Of the enigmatic history of ruinic writing Now you may ask yourself How did I get here? No, that's a talking head song. You may ask yourself, hey, what's a runestone? You know, what's a... Runestone. Well, I'll tell you what they are.

All right. They are several feet high and made of granite or other stone material predominantly during the Viking age between 800 and 1,050 there were over 6,000 ruins stones across Scandinavia.

Speaking of the Vikings, you know, I started watching Vikings Velhalla on Netflix. There's two seasons. All right, so I made it through season one. Why did we just run off the king? I know that we're supposed to,

you know, think that this is kind of a real story, kind of, it's based on a true story. But, like, close to the end of season one. There's a couple episodes left. They just run the king just disappears.

He took over. He takes over London. Oh, this is a spoiler for Vikings Valhalla. He takes over London. And then he marries the old queen. And then he disappears. This goes away. He goes off to battle.

And I liked him. King Canud. I loved him. He was a great character. And he just disappears. And they bring in an old guy that kind of looks like him. That's his father. And so they ended the season without the king.

I just don't understand. I know that he was going off to battle and stuff. And I know that we're, you know, basing this on a true story. I get it. But I feel like, you know, since we're basing it on a true story, maybe we, you know, let the guy stay.

He was kind of a cool guy. It was a cool character. He was king. He was a king. He was a king. Connooth. Just disappointing. So I'm hoping.

that since season two, they bring my boy back. Now, I know in real life, I was reading a little bit about the king, and in real life he goes off, and I think he dies in some battle in Denmark or something. But I don't know that he ever comes back to London. I think he's supposed to come back to London, though, before he goes off to another battle. But anyway, I enjoyed the first season of Vikings of Hala,

except for that. I like the Greenlanders, like the Vikings, you know, where they're battling be amongst themselves between the pagans and the Christians. And, you know, it was interesting. But if it's based on a true story, you know what, let's

change a couple of things and keep the king around for a little bit. What do you say? Okay, sorry. Sidetrack. Back to a little bit of the headlines. Chemists have developed a fluorescent dye that allows imaging of difficult to see cancerous brain tumors. I thought we already had

to die, but I guess we needed some new kind of die. FDX discloses $450 million of assets that were hacked. Yeah, I don't know what happened to that $415 million. We were hacked. What are you going to do?

You know, I set it down. The next thing I know, I turn around, the computer was gone. That's just another $415 million. What are you going to do? Sorry, I know. I know. I want it to be there. I want that money there for you, but, you know, I'm just sitting here in my mom's house thinking, wow, man, if I only had to let that $415 million be hacked, you guys could have got some of your money back. All right. All right. No problem. I see where Disney is

having trouble with their board. The Mouse House is not pleased with the new investor Nelson Peltz trying to gain a spot on its board. And they're fighting. They're doing. They're doing. They're duking it out. In fact, that's what they're doing at the Disney board meetings. They're just fighting it out. This guy accumulated like $900 million in Disney. And then he wants to get a seat on the board. And he's saying that, hey, the company is screwed up. They don't know what they're doing. And the CEO successions plan is BS. And so I want in. And Disney's like, no. So that's fun. Oh, and Microsoft, the tech giant as you know. Rumored to be cutting 5% of its workforce, about 10,000 people.

They're getting the pig slip, I think, today. But the report is that it's coming. So according to the CEO, that, hey, Microsoft isn't immune to global changes and predicted a challenging next two years. Okay. Well, I thought you guys were just investing in the $10 billion chat GPD OpenAI. Yeah, we're doing that. That's separate.

That's separate from you employees that need to get paid. We don't want anything to do with that. Oh, all right. No problem. I know Amazon is getting ready to cut big time, too. And one little political thing before I give you a couple of my favorite stories to end the show. One thing, I see where Army General Mark Millie traveled to Ukraine, Poland border, and he's holding in-person meetings.

with top Ukrainian military officials. I do not like that at all. Do. I know these dingleberries at the WEF are talking about making Ukraine part of NATO. If Millie's over there on the border, I know that we had some kind of training going on over there. Our military, instead we're bringing them over here now to train Ukrainian military guys with our equipment.

But now if Millie's over there, we have still our boots on the ground in Poland, the NATO country. Stay out of there. We need to be done with this Russian-Ukrainian war. Man, we are in this thing for a long time. And Millie's another one that screwed up Afghanistan, or at least the withdrawal of Afghanistan. And he's over there. He's going to screw up this Ukrainian-Russian thing, too. I just...

I want to be done with the U.S. Ukrainian-Russian war. I want to be done with that soon. And I don't think there is anything close to being done with it because this administration loves it and is all for it. So, all right, all right, all right. It's not really all right, though, but I just say that because I get angry and I don't want to be angry.

I don't. I'm talking to you. I don't want to be angry. Let's talk about the price of love. You know how much it costs for love. Well, Match Group is testing a $500 a month subscription to Tinder. So according to Bloomberg, while the Tinder feature is still in an experimental mode,

they're moving ahead with subscriptions for Hinge, which is another one of the dating apps, rolling out a souped-up version for high. motivated daters that cost up to $60 a month. We totally sign up for it if it meant seeing. This article talks about, hey, do we get to see extra special profiles? I'll sign up for it.

Really, what they're doing is setting up a way for you to subscribe to prostitution. That's the way I read this. I get a subscription to your app. and if I'm paying $500 a month to swipe right and the other person is paying $500 a month to swipe right when I swipe right I expect to swipe right you know what I'm saying

and I think you do and I'll leave you with one last thought for the day here during throwing out some headlines at you I read this yesterday on Jeff Fisher Radio Facebook page. The last year, or the last day of this year. The last day of this year is 1231, 233.

So that means the last day of this year is one, two, three, one, two, three. Now how scared are you? Stream and subscribe to more Blaze Media content at the Blaze.com. slash podcasts. Unwrap holiday magic at Holt Renfrew with gifts that say I know you. From festive and cozy fashion to luxe beauty and fragrance sets, our special selection has something for every style and price point. Visit our Holt's holiday shop and store or online at Holtrenfrew.com.