Chewing the Fat with Jeff Fisher - Jeffy's Corner: A Little Bit of Political Stuff Here

Episode Date: September 14, 2016

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This is the Blaze Radio on demand. Hey, this is Jeff Fisher. We'll get to the podcast. First, though, what if there was a progressive liberal phone company targeting conservative candidates and organizations? Would you want to switch to a conservative phone company to help fight against their liberal agenda? Or do nothing and accept that as the cost of owning a phone? Well, now you can take action. That's why Patriot Mobile was created.

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I'm going to start this off now so that we get it out of the way. Get it off our plate because I know. I'm going to apologize right off the bat. A little Hillary. We do a little political stuff here. We'll get it out of the table. Okay? Get it off the table.

Because we had the Hillary coughing fit, which was tremendous. And I say tremendous because, A, what do you think? Maybe we kill the mic. Just, you know, just a thought from me. Hey, just to pot it down. Hey, there's a guy running sound pot it down. Maybe it was a union guy in Ohio that couldn't do it.

He couldn't touch it. I know our man, Trumpka was there, so it's possible. The union guy said, that's not my job. I can't pot that down. Get the other, get the radio engineer here. So it could have been a union issue. could have been Hillary maybe, I don't know, drop the mic down when you're coughing. It's a good rule of thumb.

You know, when you're, when you have a microphone in front of you and you go to cough, I don't know, pull away from the microphone. That's all. Just pull away from the mic. Simple. Two, you know that they just heard from Dingleberry, the vice president running mate, Kane. So he'd already spoke a bunch. So he wasn't prepared to come back up there and talk some more, although it would have been a good call on his part to just step up there and say, you know,

go ahead, get it out of your system, let me finish up what I was saying, something. You know, maybe Hillary would be pissed. Cancels would get all hot and bothered if he did that. They all had throat lozenges. He even put one in his mouth while she was coughing. That's how bad her cough was. Other human beings were putting lozenges in their mouths. saying, oh my God, that's horrible.

I've got to put a lozage in my mouth just in case I start coughing. She had a glass of water there and she had a lozange on the podium. Maybe more than one, but she had one that she put in her mouth. So she was prepared for the possible coughing fit. Right? Not sure what brings it on. She had a great line prepared in case, look, if you get a new coughing fit and you're on stage, here's a line you can use.

Okay? It'll be funny and just get it out. And she's got it out poorly, but she did get it out. And she's just not likable. Now, I'm not going to play the whole four or five minute clip. I don't even know if I can take it all, to be honest with you, but I just want to point out that I counted in the entire time on stage. It was just under 30 coughs.

And it might even have been 30 because I counted like some of them. I let some of them go. because they weren't full coughs. They were like an extension of the last cough. So let's hear Hillary go into her cough fast and start off the week right. Our Labor Day special. Happy, happy Labor Day.

See, she's unbelievable. When we were trying to figure out where we could be, we all said, let's go to Cleveland. Unbelievable. Unbelievable. And I want to thank Congresswoman Marsha Fudge for hosting us. Two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, I've been talking, ten, eleven, twelve, thirteen, fourteen, fourteen,

see that was kind of an extension. Every time I think about Trump, I get allergic. Every time I think about Trump, I can't take anymore. Seriously, just let it go stop. Every time I think about Trump, I get allergic. Prepared funny line. Good line. She barely got it out.

She's just not good. Just not good. She's under fire. People worried about her health. Think she's sick. There are stories abounding about her health. Any kind of health issues, mental and physical. Emails. Email scandal still ongoing. Clinton Foundation scandal still ongoing.

And yet, who do we beat up? What is Aleppo? Gary Johnson. Come on. Now, while I'm not a big fan of Gary Johnson, you know, the douche on MSNBC, what is Aleppo? Aleppo I don't know What What are you talking about Are you kidding? Aleppo

Now What is Aleppo? Thank you Come on Come on now I give you You know I'm not a fan of Gary And I know that he's

You know They've even tried to let him get off the hook The next couple days And he couldn't even do it to himself He's still throwing himself under the bus He's just bad too I mean the top three. Holy crap.

We're in trouble. Hillary Clinton. Donald Trump. Gary Johnson. And Stein is in trouble, which we'll talk a little bit about later, but she's in trouble from, they've got an arrest warrant for her. I don't know if that's, we'll stand or not. So I think it had something to do with the pipeline up in South Dakota, which we'll talk

a little, which we'll talk a little bit about there. Amazing. And then we had our president. Barack Obama in Laos. The first president ever to visit Laos. Whoa. Okay. Thank you.

And he was, you know, another tour of the world, espounding how great the United States really is. It's not because that's necessary for development. It's usually because we're being lazy and we're not being as creative as we could be about how to do it in the smarter. sustainable way. All right? Okay. All right. Okay.

So any other countries we haven't called on yet? Vietnam? Any other countries? We've got all the countries around that are close neighbors right here. I'm in Laos, but we're going to talk to all the countries. I'm in front of all these countries because we're all here answering questions, and I want to be sure to tell them how lazy we are in the United States of America.

But if that wasn't enough, just the one time, heck, let's do it again. The United States, it's not because that's necessary for development. It's usually because we're being lazy and we're not being as creative as we could be about how to do it in a smarter, sustainable way. All right? Okay. That's the same one.

He did it again. Is and can be a great force for good in the world. But because we're such a big country, we haven't always had to know about other parts of the world. You know, if you are in Laos, you need to know about Thailand and China and Cambodia because you're a small country and they're right next door and you need to know who they are. They're attacking you all the time. If you're in the United States, sometimes you can feel lazy and think, you know, we're so big. We don't have to really know anything about other people. and that's part of what I'm trying to change because this is actually the region that's going to grow faster than any place else in the world.

I really do. It has the youngest population and the economy is growing faster. He can't leave office soon enough. The sad thing is he can't leave office soon enough, but who's going to be taking his place? Hillary Clinton Donald Trump Gary Johnson And what is Aleppo

Jill Stein No No I mean yes but no Just bad Just bad I told you We'll talk a little bit about

Donald Trump It has immigration plan Coming up in the broadcast But I told you that I'd prove to you That Americans are not lazy And I'm sick and tired of being told that Americans are lazy. I'm going to give you an example

that proves Americans are not lazy. This is American ingenuity, capitalism, and freedom. All wrapped into one little story. I want you to meet Monica Riley, 27 years of age.

She models on websites for big, beautiful women. And she wants to keep filing on the pounds right up until she's immobile, with the goal of becoming the world's fattest woman. Monica gorges all day, scarfing food cooked by her devoted boyfriend, Sid Riley. Now, I will say at one point in my life, I said I wanted to be the fattest man in the world. I said I wanted to be cranged out of my home for Christmas.

but I never actually, at one point I stopped myself from doing that, lost weight and realized, no, I can't do that. Monica, it's gone beyond that line, setting an example to all fat people. Feeder Sid, 25, spends his entire day cooking for his obese girlfriend, feeding her through a funnel, rolling her over when her 91-inch stomach is full. size 38, Monica, will gorge on over 8,000 calories every day and already needs her boyfriend's help to wash herself and move around. The plan?

Reach a thousand pounds and become immobile. I would feel like a queen. Sid waiting on me hand and foot. He's excited about it, too. It's a sexual fantasy for us, too. We talk about it a lot. He already has to help me get it. get off the sofa, get me out of bed.

Heck, if I lay down after a big dinner, he has to help me roll over because my belly is too full for me to roll. You know, we're so big. This is America. All right? Capitalism. Freedom. And we are not lazy.

Sick of hearing about it. We are not lazy. After she met Sydney Online four months ago, Monica gained 56 pounds and started to feel sexier than ever. In a typical day, she'll eat six biscuits, six sausages in a bread roll, a big bowl of sugary cereal, two weight gain shakes, four McChicken sandwiches, four double cheeseburgers, large French fries, 30 chicken nuggets, macaroni and cheese, taco baguette, bell and a gallon of ice cream. The bigger I get, the sexier I feel.

I love my big soft belly stuffing myself with food really turns me on. Sid loves to cook for me and hand-feed me, and I've achieved so much since we've been together. He feeds me around the clock, and I never have to get up to do anything. Sid claims that he loves his girlfriend's enormous figure. He claims he'd stop feeding her if she decided she wanted to lose weight. Wait, wait, wait, what? You're going to stop feeding her if she wanted to lose weight. Sid, you need to rethink that.

This is a misconception about feederism. The immobility is about control. I love her and I love doing things for her. Caring for her is a dream come true. Sid prepares special milkshates to help Monica gain weight and will feed them to her through a funnel. In fact, the funnel feeding is what I really look forward to, said Monica. I find it to be a very sexual experience, and I know Sid likes it too.

I have 20,000 online fans, and they love to watch the funnel feeding. It's a big hit. This right here is America at its finest. Okay? The next time you hear our president of the United States tell you that America is lazy. You say to yourself, no. What about Monica?

Okay? Monica is out there. Proving capitalism works. Proving freedom works. There is one little problem with the story that I have, although you may not. They plan to have a baby, which they will raise from her fat bed. She said, there's nothing to stop me from raising a child from my bedroom. We could get a nanny in to help around the house and take the baby out and about.

There's nothing to stop us raising a child. Some people might think it's selfish, but I'm confident we could be good parents. Terry is just one of the people who warned that her eating obsession would kill her, but that hasn't stopped Monica from wanting to gain even more weight. Monica said I could get hit by a car tomorrow and my life would be. be over. That might not be necessarily true. If I, at least if I die this way, I will have lived out the life I wanted and fulfilled all my dreams. See? Try doing that in Laos. Try doing that in Vietnam. Try doing that in China.

I think not. I think not. Monica, on her way to being the fattest woman alive, cared for by boyfriend, by feeder, I'm sorry, I don't want to call him completely boyfriend. Boyfriend feeder, Sid, hoping to one day surpassed the 91-inch stomach. Hoping to one day continue to be able to gorge on more than just 8,000 calories a day. Tell me, tell me America is lazy again, and I will call you a liar. Hey, this is Jeff Fisher. Let me tell you about this, and then we'll get to the show, okay? If you're in the market for a new mattress,

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