Chewing the Fat with Jeff Fisher - Jeffy's Corner: 'Food Stamp Banana Booze Buy Back Program'

Episode Date: March 21, 2015

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You're listening to the Jeff Fisher Show. Then, of course, we have the story of people getting all wound up because people are using the EBT cards. Not for food. What? They're trading them for drugs? Now, according to a sheriff in Florida, he is saying that it's actually worth more than cash, the EBT cards. I, you know, I find that hard to believe. It's just as good as cash.

There's no way that you're going to get more for your money with the EBT card. It's just not going to happen. If I'm a drug dealer, no way am I saying, you know, you have $100 worth of goods on your EBT card. I'm not giving you $100 worth of drugs or goods if you aren't going to use it for what it's supposed to be used for. You're going to get, I'll tell you, you know, I'll give you. $75, and then I'll take the card, and I'll use it for the $100, or I'll trade it again. That's been going on forever. Some of the sheriffs need to get up to pace a little bit.

I mean, even when they had actual, when I was in the grocery business back a thousand years ago, you know, they had food stamps, not the cards, but the actual money, and you would issue them. And the only thing that you could get change from, actual money from, was the debt. So you could use, you know, if you had $100, you had $520s. Okay. So you use that and you would get change back in food stamp money. Stores had to have all the food stamp money along with real cash. It was the cards have got to be far superior because then you're not getting real cash back.

However, what some of the – I mean, they busted people a lot over the year, stores that would take. give you 50 cents on the dollar for a food stamp. For a food stamp dollars, you give them a $20, they give you $10 cash, so you could go buy whatever you wanted. Most people, I'm guessing, were using it for some sort of drug. And the drugs, the alcoholics that just wanted to buy alcohol, the liquor, we used to have a, there used to be a lady that would come in with $1 food stamps and she would buy a banana.

so that, you know, the banana was, you know, whatever, we'll say a quarter, and then she would get 75 cents back because she would use her dollar food stamp bill and get 75 cents cash back, real money, so that she could just build up. And she would just go through the line and at the time, I'm like, come on. I mean, we've got to, there's got to be some kind of, there was no real rule that said she couldn't just keep going through the line. So, you know, I was like, okay, once an hour. All right. You're going to try to, you're going to kind of get out me, you're going to try to do me for some cash so you can go buy some liquor. You go, you go ahead and buy a banana, go through the line, and then, you know, once an hour. Okay.

I'll set my own rule for you. You come through once an hour, you get a banana, you get your cash bag. She wasn't very happy about that. However, amazingly, she did it. So this has been going on for a long time. So I don't know that you get around that except that you maybe try to get less people on the electronic benefit transfer cards. Maybe try to find them jobs so that they actually have some money to do business. So maybe we do that.

Or we just keep giving more and more EBT cards out. That's all. No problem, right? Doesn't matter. Doesn't matter at all. Now, today is the first day of spring. So I got to, someone sent me a link to the 25 best two-line jokes. And if you follow this broadcast, we like to have some broadcast dedicated to humor, jokes to get you through.

So it's not, I don't know that I'm calling this the entire joke Saturday, But, you know, it's the first day of spring, right? It's the spring, so it's a spring into two-line jokes to get you through spring. You can take them with you. So every break, I thought I'd give you a couple of, you know, a few two-line jokes to take with you for the day. And, you know, you can chuckle to yourself. So we'll start out with three of the best two-line jokes here on the... First day of spring on the Blaze Radio Network.

Parallel lines have so much in common. It's a shame they'll never meet. My wife accused me of being immature. I told her to get out of my fort. Women only call me ugly until they find out how much money I make. Then they call me ugly and poor. This is the Jeff Fisher Show on the Blaze Radio Network. Thank you.