Chewing the Fat with Jeff Fisher - Jeffy's Corner: Naughty Neighbors & Creepy Kids

Episode Date: January 16, 2016

Jeff Fisher is live from 6am to 8am ET, Saturday. Listen for free on The Blaze Radio Network: www.theblaze.com/radio & www.iheart.comFollow Jeffy on Twitter: @JeffyMRA Like Jeffy on Facebook: www.facebook.com/JeffFisherRadioFollow Jeffy on Instagram: @jeffymra Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

You're listening to the Jeff Fisher Show. When our water heater broke down last month, it was a nightmare. It took five hours for the plumber to show up, and he charged us a couple of hundred bucks just to come out. Then it cost another $1,800 to put in the new water heater. By the time it was all said and done, I felt like I'd been taken. But what else could I do? The smartest thing you can do is get a home warranty from American residential warranty. Their home warranties pay to repair or replace all your major appliances when they break,

and they will break and at the worst possible time. Call American Residential Warranty right now for free information on home warranties starting at just pennies a day. Don't wait for your refrigerator to stop running or your ceiling fans to stop turning. Call American Residential Warranty right now. Ask how you can save up to 50% on washer and dryer coverage. Just call 1-800-6-8-6-39-10.

That's 1-800-6-39-10. Again, 1-800-6-6-6. 686, 3910. Call now. So with the last story and the neighbors complaining about the kids playing in the yard, I was reminded before I get to, I was speaking about these creepy kids. And some of the stories are fascinating. We're going to, we have to talk about these creepy kids. But I was reminded about a story that I read about a neighbor who was upset.

with her neighbor because they were having very loud sex. Now, that's apartment living, right? And if you live in an apartment building, you have to maybe once in a while, perhaps you think about moving into a building with thicker walls, right? But she tweeted out and welcome to the age of social media. So at 1119, she tweets out, Who wants to hear my terrible neighbor having extremely loud sex?

And she has audio recorded. And then 20 minutes later, she tweets out, So this is still happening. Now, the second, the first audio is okay. I mean, you can kind of, you know, you hear what's happening. And you would think, well, you know, maybe it's okay. Then 20 minutes later under the, so this is still happening tweet, she sends this piece of audio out. So if you didn't have the first piece of audio, you may almost think that someone is being harmed.

Now that is an issue. I may have a problem with making, you know, with that. much noise in the neighborhood. But the homeschooling kids in the backyard in the neighborhood, no, I don't have a problem with that at all. That is great. So this is still going on. I don't know what I would do.

It's pretty strange. Because I've lived in a lot of apartments. But I never lived in an apartment where something, the neighbors were right on the other side of the wall. I guess. I'm trying to think of the smallest apartment I lived in. The bedroom was on the far side away. Oh, my gosh, the apartments were constructed correctly.

Do you mean that the bedrooms were on the opposite side of the next apartment so that you were asleep? You were the farthest away you could be in that room away from the next apartment. Huh. Amazing how that happens. So I don't know that I would, what would actually do. But if your kid's a creepy kid, this is what the people in Texas should be worried about. If you have kids that are the creepy kids.

My daughter has imaginary friends. Yes, are you saying your daughter is one of the creepy kids? No, not yet. Because she just plays with them. And they're friends. and I haven't heard anything like these. One of the stories and the creepy kid stories is my son, from the age of three,

always tells me about the creeper man who lives in my mom and dad's bedroom. He brings it up after he visits them. So that's his grandparents. I made the mistake once of asking what he looks like, and my son said, oh, he doesn't have a face. Oh, okay, great. Great, no problem. A parent of one of my students told us in a meeting that she was concerned because her son, seven years old,

talked about an invisible ghost who would talk to him and play with him in his room. He said the ghost was called the captain and was an old white guy with a beard. The kid would tell his mom that the captain told him, when he grows up, his job will be to kill people. And that the captain would tell him who needed to be killed. The kid would cry and say he doesn't want to kill when he grows up. but the captain tells him he doesn't have a choice and he'll get used to killing after a while. You may want to take your child to some sort of therapist if you're hearing that.

It's just me. Maybe get some help and I would make sure that perhaps you have some child locks on the knife drawers. When my daughter was three, she had an imaginary friend named Kelly who lived in her closet. Kelly sat in a little rocking chair while she slept, played with her, typical imaginary friend. Then, two years later, the wife and I are watching the new Amityville horror. Our daughter walks out right when the dead girl goes all black-eyed. Far from being disturbed, she said, that looks like Kelly. Kelly, who? You know, the dead girl that lived in my closet? Oh, okay, no problem.

My little brother's imaginary friend Roger lived under our coffee table. Roger had a wife and nine kids. Roger and his family lived peacefully alongside us for three years. One day, my little brother announced that Roger wouldn't be around anymore since he shot and killed him in his whole family. You bet. Okay, creepy kid. Creepy kid. Time to maybe, you know, get some hell.

Maybe. and I was 16. No, I don't want to do that one, never mind. This one was talking about how one of the kids always spoke of a man in an Easter bunny costume. No. So that was just a frightening

because the kid just yelled, he's in here, he's in here, but he never was. The bunny man. When my mom was younger, she had an imaginary friend named Shaggy. When she was finished with Shaggy, she topped him up and put him up and put them in the fridge.

See, if your kid were to, if my daughter came to me and said, one of her purple gang, no, or one less purple gang, dad, because I chopped one up and put them in the fridge, I might have a chat. I might have to have a chat. But that's just me. That's just me. When my brother was literally, he acted like he had angels talking to him

every second. One day my mom overheard him say, I can't kill him. He's my only dad. You might need some help. You might need some help. My daughter used to tell me about a man who came into her room every night and put the sign of the cross on her forehead. I thought it was just a dream. Then my mother-in-law sent over some family photos.

My daughter looked right at the picture of my husband's father, who had been dead for 16 years. That's the man who comes into my room at night. Wow. Think about it. Now, the father told the mom that his dad would always do the sign of the cross on his forehead when he was young. Aw, Grandpa visiting the granddaughter from beyond? My wife and I overheard my two-year-old daughter on the baby monitor, wake up one Saturday morning and say, What? Okay, I'll tell her. Then she got up, came into our bedroom, and told my wife, Mary says you're doing a good job.

Mary was the mother. She had just passed away. Coming back to visit the family. Isn't that special? Yes, it is. Getting visited from beyond from the old family members. It's important. In high school, one of my best friends had a little sister who was five or six years old.

One day we stopped by his place. Now, this may add to why. the girl may be a little weird. In the story, he talks about completely high. We stopped by his place, completely high, because he needed to get his magic cards. Right. While waiting for him to come downstairs, his sister came up to me and said, Icey told me to ask if you know when you're going to die.

I laughed her imaginary friend. I even helped her draw a picture of him once, so I played along and said, no, of course not. No one knows that. Hopefully when I'm very old. The girl shook her head and said, no, ICE wants me to tell you, it'll be tonight and walked away. So you go to your friend's house completely high. Maybe this little sister is, I don't know, messing with you a little bit. I was 17 and babysitting a friend of the family's six-year-old boy. He'd been in the bed a couple of hours, I just peeked into check on him. He wasn't in the bed.

And when I opened the door, I saw he was standing in the corner facing the wall. I asked him, what are you doing? All he did was turn around, smile, and put his finger to his lips. Shh. What are you doing? Leave us. It's the punishment. Okay.

Mom, dad, your boy's up in your room, standing in the corner. Okay? Uh, it's freaking me out a little bit. It's getting punished from the dead people. And my favorite creepy kid story is, A kid I used to babysit had imaginary friends. They were dead. One had no head.

One was an old lady. They were both bloody. The one with no head had inside sticking out of his neck. I didn't ask him questions about them because, F that. I didn't ask the kid question about it because, F, that. I don't want to know. So I guess that's the answer if the kid says, hey, no, I've got two friends. They're both dead.

One's an old lady and one's bloody, and the one has the inside sticking out of his neck. You don't need to ask any questions. Just, okay, time for bed. This is Jeff Fisher Show on the Blaze Radio Network This is The Jeff Fisher Show On the Blaze Radio Network

When our water heater broke down last month It was a nightmare It took five hours for the plumber to show up And he charged us a couple of hundred bucks Just to come out And then it cost another $1,800 To put in the new water heater By the time it was all said and done

I felt like I'd been taken But what else could I do? The smartest thing you can do is get a home warranty from American residential warranty. Their home warranties pay to repair or replace all your major appliances when they break, and they will break, and at the worst possible time, call American residential warranty right now. For free information on home warranties starting at just pennies a day, don't wait for your refrigerator to stop running or your ceiling fans to stop turning.

Call American residential warranty right now. Ask how you can save up to 50% on washer and dryer coverage. Just call 1,800. 686 3910. That's 1,80063863910. Again, 1,800, 686 3910. Call now.