Chewing the Fat with Jeff Fisher - Misidentified… | 3/5/25

Episode Date: March 5, 2025

Cinco De Marcho?... Waymo One and Uber now in Austin… WB and Sony partnering up in Vegas… Email: [e-mail] Carolina Fires… Another Fort name change… Reacher on Prime… MobLand on paramount+… Gangs of London / Spotless... Scream 7 is coming… Pete Rose Pardon?... Jon Gruden back in the Ring of Honor… Jimmy Johnson retires… Who Died Today: Sylvester Turner 70… Nine students dismembered in Mexico… Unidentified woman 57… Gene Hackman update… Pope update… Teleportation is coming?... Joke of The Day… Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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And now, Chewing the Fat with Jeff Fisher. Today marks a holiday that I was not aware of. If you're listening live, today is the 5th of March 2025. Now, it's also Ash Wednesday. Yesterday, I hope we all celebrated Fat Tuesday. Jeff, you celebrate that every day. Yeah, no, I got the joke. But today, because of the way the calendar works out,

it's Ash Wednesday, the start of Lent. And so that is good through April 17th, and then Good Friday is the 18th, and then Easter is April 20th this year. However, one of the things that coincides with the 5th of March is Cinco de Marcho. I apologize. I did not know that this holiday existed. So Cinco de Marcho is celebrated every year on March 5th. just 12 days before St. Patrick's Day. Okay, it is a play on the Mexican holiday name Cinco de Mayo.

And it's a day widely celebrated by those who are not regular or heavy drinkers so as to ease themselves into the demands of St. Patrick's Day. Now, of course, we have to say, hey, hey, hey, Cinco de Marcho is a celebration of drinking but you need to drink safely and in moderation uh-huh so uh-synco de marcho we don't know where it came from apparently there's a guy who created it that goes by the name of carlos fantistico who i guess is a made-up name because of his caro fancisco which is the 80s television classic night rider uh okay Sure. Apparently, the way the story goes in 2007, while drinking at a Mexican restaurant,

the Matador Fantistico was enjoying his margarita and happened to notice the date. It was March 5th. A thought came to him. He was at a Mexican restaurant enjoying a Mexican drink, but the decor around him was green and St. Patrick's Day was less than a fortnight away. He imagined a holiday that would celebrate the best of both cultures, and thus Cinco de Marcho. A holiday with a Mexican name celebrating the drunken jubilance associated with St. Patrick's Day. So you're supposed to go ahead and just start drinking today so you get that tolerance up for St. Patrick's Day. It doesn't say that if you're supposed to drink every day and build up that tolerance, or if you just do it today to get used to what you can and can't drink. I would say since St. Patrick's Day is, you know,

geez, quite a ways away, 12 days away. You need to go ahead and just, you know, just, you need to go ahead and just take a drink every day. But that's just me. But for sure, we need to celebrate this, it's a made-up holiday, this Cinco de Marcho, a holiday that, well, is new to me. Apparently it's been around since 2007. So those of you listening who celebrate Cinco de Marcho, I apologize for not knowing about this holiday, but we know about it now, don't we? Welcome. Welcome to Chewing the Fat. Those of you living in Austin, Texas, today's a big day. Uber expands driverless Waymo ride shares that are going to begin in Austin today. It marks the fourth market to receive the company's autonomous vehicles behind Phoenix, San Francisco, and Los Angeles.

So starting today, you'll be able to access the autonomous Waymo, one through the Uber app. Okay. I guess. Cool. We'll see. They've got a lot of money. I mean, Alphabet is backing them.

That's Google, for those of you that are unaware. So they've dumped in, I don't know, billions of dollars to the Waymo 1 Robotaxy autonomous vehicles in these other cities, Los Angeles, San Francisco, and Phoenix, like I said. And they've raised money. as well. And they're intending on expanding to Atlanta and other cities throughout the coming year and years. So Waymo confirmed that the start of the fully autonomous Robotaxi services in Austin. All you have to do, users who request an UberX, an Uber comfort, an Uber green or an Uber comfort vehicle will have the opportunity to opt in and match with Waymo's autonomous vehicles

when available. Riders who are matched with the Waymo 1 equipped EV, currently the Jaguar I-Pace, will be able to travel within a 37-mile footprint around much of Austin, including Hyde Park, downtown, Montopoulos. Through the Uber app, riders will see options to unlock the Waymo 1 vehicle's doors,

open the trunk, and begin their ride once they're inside. Yay! Now they say, all of their data makes it safer in many ways to use the autonomous vehicles. All right. I mean, if it's your data, if you say so. So it's a multi-year contract deal with Austin, and it's a partner, I'm sorry, it's a partnership with Uber and Austin,

and Atlanta is coming later this year. Miami is in the works for 2026. And there you have it. So be ready if you're using Uber today in, well, Austin. And for sure, San Francisco, Phoenix and Los Angeles. And coming soon to a city near you, you'll be able to order your Uber autonomous vehicle. So you don't have to even worry about an Uber driver.

You just hop in and go where you want to go. Within limits, of course. Yay. You know, I'm surprised that they don't have this in Las Vegas. There must be, I must, and maybe if someone is from Vegas, you can reach out to me and tell me if there's been some kind of battle between Uber and Waymo autonomous vehicles and taxi drivers, like there has been in New York.

So maybe that's why they don't use Vegas for their autonomous vehicles. Because that would seem to me that that would be a perfect city for it. I mean, they're building everywhere in Vegas now. I mean, I just saw a story where Warner Brothers and Sony have ditched their competing Las Vegas studio plans. They were each going to build this monstrous studios, but they wanted big tax credits. And Nevada said, we're only going to be behind one project, so you guys can go over in the corner and fight it off. Well, that's what they did. and they're going to work together now.

They're going to team up to make a single $400 million facility. Okay. So we'll see how that goes. Apparently, they still need another $80 million in yearly tax credits approved by the skeptical state officials. I don't know why they're skeptical. Just they give them the tax credits and let them build their damn studio. Are you working for Warner Brothers and Sony now, Jeff?

Yeah, yeah, that's what I'm doing. But them joining forces seems like a pretty good thing to do. The standalone facility, $8.5 billion in spending over 17 years. I would say that that's a pretty good deal. I do not work for the state of Nevada. I do not work for the city of Las Vegas. And I most definitely do not work for Warner Brothers or Sony. However, if they would like to use the chewing the fat,

Jeff Fisher consulting firm, I'm happy to help them out. Just reach out to me on X at Jeffrey JFR. You can reach out to me on Instagram or Facebook, Jeff Fisher Radio. You can reach out to me through email, Chewing the Fat at theblaze.com. And let me know that you'd like to, you know, contractually obligate yourself to my services.

For a reasonable fee. Chewing the fat at the blaze.com. And of course, you can, as a listener who is not affiliated with Vegas or Nevada or Warner Brothers or Sony, you can always email the show chewing the fat at the blaze.com and give me your thoughts. Many of you do. Thank you. I appreciate it. You know, the ones that are nice.

And you can also reach out and let me know if you want to be a contestant on what's the lie. That's the game show we play every Friday. You can reach out with your possibility, your submission for a joke of the day, which, you know, I see. them all. Some, you know, make me laugh. Some definitely need work, but I appreciate you sending that all to the Chewing the Fat email address. Now, you can always order a cameo. I doubt Warner Brothers and Sony are going to order a cameo from me or the state of Nevada or the city of Las Vegas, but I'm happy to do one for them at Jeffey JFR on the Cameo app. And that, of course, is not free for sure. But, you know, it's worth every doggone pay.

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spread to over 2,000 acres, and according to this, remained largely uncontained as of yesterday morning. officials listed around 160 wildfires in North Carolina as of yesterday afternoon. Now, they're putting some out because there was, I don't know, a couple hundred coming out of the weekend, which is incredible. And all the fires covered more than 2,300 acres of land, according to the North Carolina Forest Service. I mean, they cannot catch a break. Wow. If it's not rain and wind, it's then cold. And now it's fires.

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j-a-s-a-s-e-a-s-e-a-se dot com enter the promo code jeffy j-ffy at checkout and get a discount on your order so promo code jeffy at j-a-sse dot com so they did another one uh defense secretary pete had seth renamed fort more in georgia back to fort benning yes fort benning now it was a originally named for Lieutenant General Henry Benning, who was a Confederate general. Can't have that anymore. No, those are bad people now. So it's named now after Corporal Fred G. Benning. Oh, okay. There you go. Corporal Fred G. Benning, who served in Europe during World War I and was then elected mayor of this town in Nebraska upon returning home, according to the Defense Department. He died in May of 1974.

Corporal Benning was the embodiment of the infantry men's creed, if I'd say the word properly, has he never failed his country's trust and fought to the objective to triumph for his unit and his country. Okay. Now, the family of Hal Moore, who had the name after they kicked the Confederate general to the curb, after it was Fort Moore. They're a little unhappy. They thought it would stay Fort Moore

because Hal Moore served in the Army from 1945 to 1977, commanded the Army's first battalion in the 7th Cavalry Regiment, which was depicted in the 2002 film We Were Soldiers. Julia Moore was an instrumental figure in establishing how the military notifies and cares for spouses

of fallen service members. As the base is being renamed, Hedgeseth said he was directing the army to honor the legacy of the Moors in a manner that celebrates their significant contributions to the local community and the army. Okay. And he said that they are going to be renaming some other bases as well. So more to come from the new Secretary of Defense or Defense Secretary, Pete Hedgeseth. And as long as we're talking about changes, you know, President Trump renamed. Mount Danali or just

Danali to back to Mount McKinley, which, you know, okay, fine. I mean, Denali I thought was fine, but they, you know, obviously wanted it to be Mount McKinley again. And then the Gulf of Mexico is now the Gulf of America for us here in the United States.

Guess what? Other countries can still call it the Gulf of Mexico. Just here in the U.S., it's the Gulf of America. Well, Texas, Lieutenant Governor, or Dan Patrick, wants to change a name now. He wants to get rid of the New York strip steak. And he wants the menus to read Texas strip.

Okay. He's got a new resolution where he wants the stakes to be Texas strip, not New York strip steak. And, you know, we better market Texas beef. And we have 12.2 million head of cattle. And so liberal New York, should get to credit for our hardworking ranchers. You know, I like that and I get it,

but you're not going to change that. It's the New York strip steak, okay. I know, you know, you can call it Texas strip if you want, and if you own a restaurant or two and you want to call it the Texas strip, that's fine. You go ahead. But I think people will still call it New York strip steak, but, you know, we'll see.

We'll see if the resolution. solution takes hold. And then, so when you go to the restaurant, in the state of Texas anyway, and you see Texas Strip, that's really just the New York Strip steak. All right, let's go to the break room. I need something cool to drink desperately. You know, I talked about how 1923 is fired back up again. We're two episodes in.

It drops every Sunday. I'm really, the first two episodes have been really, really good. I can't wait for the next episodes. I'm in the middle of watching Reacher as well on Prime. I really enjoy the character and the show, Reacher. This new season has been... It's okay. It's all right. It's definitely Reacher.

I'm past... What's his face? Alan Ritchin and his Trump-hating diatribe that he was on for a little bit. But, you know, it's still okay. I love the character, Reacher. So, you know, it's... been worth watching. Then I see there's a new show coming out on Paramount Plus at the end of the month, March 30th. It's called Mobland. And it looks really good. It's from Guy Richie, Tom Hardy, Pierce Bronson,

Helen Marin, Patty Constantine. I mean, it looks really, really good. And I love shows like that. because it reminded me of gangs of London. If you haven't seen that show, well worth watching. If you like, you know, violence and mob stories, really good.

And there's another one that I love. I think it's two seasons on Netflix called Spotless. It might only be one season. It's called Spotless. It's really good. It's about this guy who does crime scene cleanup,

but then he gets goes into a business with this mobster in London. It's really good. Well worth the watch. If you haven't watched, it's called Spotless on Netflix. And for those of you wondering, and I know, man,

it's just deafening the calls for David Arquette and the return of Scream. Well, you're going to get it. He's going to return in Scream 7. So, Oh man, cannot wait for that, huh? I know. I am just as excited as you.

You know, another thing that I'm kind of excited about, although I guess I'm not really excited. That's a wrong word. It's just that it's about time. I see where they're talking about pardoning Pete Rose. So I guess Donald Trump announced that he plans on pardoning the baseball all-time hit king, Pete Rose. Yeah, in the coming weeks. I don't know what he's waiting for. Maybe the start of baseball season to do it,

but he's considering, you know, pardoning Pete Rose. And it's being reported that Major League Baseball is considering a petition to remove the Cincinnati Reds icon from the sports ineligible list. Yeah, well, he's dead now, so we can be nice to him again. And there's just, it's a crime in and of itself that Pete Roe is not in the baseball Hall of Fame. I'm sorry.

I got the whole issue with him gambling on baseball and how terrible it was. Sure, if you say so. But he's Pete Rose. And as a player, as a player, he should be in the Hall of Fame. And you want to throw in there that as a manager, Pete was disgraced and he gambled on baseball and we had to kick him out of baseball. Okay, fine. You want to throw that in there, go ahead.

as a player, he deserves to be in the Baseball Hall of Fame. No question. Also, a guy that was taken big-time heat and now seems to be making a big comeback is John Gruden. The former head coach of the Tampa Bay Buccaneers, took him to the Super Bowl, former head coach of the Oakland Raiders, Oakland Raiders, maybe L.A. Raiders, Las Vegas Raiders, he had with when he got into trouble with the NFL over those horrible emails those racist emails that went out and he said i think the lawsuit against the NFL is now done because he sued the NFL and roger goodell giddell the NFL commissioner accusing them of a Soviet-style character a

assassination by leaking the emails to publicly sabotage his career. It worked. So a three-judge panel in Nevada Supreme Court voted to dismiss Gruden's lawsuit. Okay. And in July, rejected a request by Gruden's attorneys to reconsider their decision. Hey, you guys made a decision. Do you want to reconsider that? Yeah, but no, we're not doing that.

But the court announced in October that all seven of his judges will reconsider the panel's findings, which center on the fact that Gruden's contract called for an NFL appointed arbitrator, not an outside court to settle such disputes. All right. So he does get a little revisit as that. Now, because of all this taking place, he was in the Ring of Honor in Tampa, and they took him down. They embarrassingly took his name off the Ring of Honor. Well, the Tampa Bay Buccaneers are now restoring John Gruden's name to the franchise's ring of honor at the stadium at Raymond James Stadium. And he's coming back strong. I mean, he's part of barstool sports.

He's been doing stuff on social media with his fired football coaches association. And everybody loves his take on football. And he's an inside football guy. Will he come back to coaching? Eh, I don't know. I guess he was quoted as saying he would come back and coach at the university level, but okay, I mean, he's an NFL guy. So if he's going to come back and coach, it needs to be in the NFL.

And I don't know that that is actually going to happen. Oh, and speaking to coaches in the NFL, Jimmy Johnson has now retired from Fox Sports after being the face of its NFL coverage for almost 30 years. Jimmy Johnson, wow. he was there for most of Fox's sports 31 years. He's 81 years old now. Wow. He said the most fun I've ever had in my career,

that's counting Super Bowls, national championships, was at Fox Sports. So he's no longer going to be part of the NFL coverage on Fox Sports. That's pretty amazing. Coach Johnson, Jimmy Johnson, has been there forever, and his takes are pretty good. So no more Jimmy Johnson on Fox Sports for NFL Sunday. I know, I know, dry your eyes.

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For alcohol, you must be legal drinking age. Please enjoy responsibly. Product availability varies by region. See app for details. Who died today? Who died today? Well, let's begin with Congressman, Democrat from the great state of Texas, Sylvester Turner. He died early this morning after serving just two months and two days in Congress.

he was at the state of the union address last night and then he died at his home this morning at the age of 70. Now he just took the place of Sheila Jackson Lee for her congress seat down there in Houston. Very sad. They did not give a cause of death but I guess he was taken to the hospital

and then sent home because I said he died. at his home. So whatever was wrong with him, the hospital said, yeah, go ahead, get out of here. Sad, apparently, he had suffered from bone cancer in his jaw that he had undergone surgery and six weeks of radiation therapy, but that was in 2022. So he should be cleared to go, I guess, at least that everyone thought. So rest in peace He was a big time

Trump hater And so he was and friends with Al Whatever his stupid name is It got kicked out of the speech last night You know the singer Oh yeah Al Green He's the one that got kicked out of the

Got kicked off the floor last night He was friends with our man Sylvester Turner as well and Sylvester had posted last night about hands-off Medicaid or something. I mean, Trump has answered that question for so many times. It's just disgusting. He's not going to be messing with Medicaid. But as a Democrat, I guess that's what you have to do is hate Trump

and pretend he hasn't answered the question a thousand times. So you just continue to ask the same question over and over again. So rest in peace to Sylvester, Turner, Congressman from the great state of Texas, dead at the age of 70. And just as a political side note, that means that the House of Representatives now has 218 Republicans and 214 Democrats with three vacancies, which gives, you know, the Speaker Johnson, a little bit more breathing room for some of the partisan battles. But there'll be special elections coming down the pike.

I think there's a couple in Florida, and then we also have this one as well. I know, that's enough politics. All right, we'll continue on with Who Died Today. So this story really is sad, but it's not as sad as it could have been. And I'm very sorry to say that. But I saw the headline, nine students found dismembered by the side of a Mexico highway after disappearing on vacation. Okay. So the first thing that I think of is that, holy cow, they are killing American students on vacation in Mexico.

A, don't go to Mexico on vacation. But if you do, you should actually stay on campus. Don't be venturing off someplace. But they were not American. They were Mexican students. So students from Mexico. And so as sad as it is, they were found dismember. by the side of the local highway with a bag of hands nearby.

So the remains were discovered in the trunk of an abandoned vehicle and underneath this tarp on the... It's just so sad. And four of the bodies were in the trunk. The other five corpses were left under the tarp. I don't know what they did. I don't know what they didn't do. But it's very, very sad.

The only saving grace for the... cartels or whoever killed them was that they weren't American students. I would say that. So they said they were listed as missing and then they saw some. I've got some footage of the students traveling on the highway, on the road. There's nine of them with the ninth victim. They said they have not identified yet. So rest in peace to the.

nine people who were found alongside of the road, the nine students, alongside of the road in Mexico, rest in peace. And then, while speaking of finding people alongside of the road, we can go, come back to America and go up to Pennsylvania. The police pulled this car over in Clearfield County, and they were stopped along Interstate 80, and police say Edward Stewart and Camio Evans. are each facing a variety of drug-related charges after investigators say approximately three pounds of methamphetamine along with a large quantity of fentanyl was found in their vehicle.

Now they also found this 57-year-old woman in the back seat who was barely alive. They don't even know who she is. She was just laying in the back seat passed out too high. Now, the two guys denied knowing anything about the meth. Drugs will make you kind of dumb. They said, no, we don't have anything. That meth isn't ours. We don't know what that is.

What's going on? Yeah, the fentanyl is ours. But the meth, we have no idea. Sir, I don't know what to tell you. Yes, we've got other warrants out for us. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We don't know who she is. She's asleep in the back of the vehicle.

You know, what are you going to do? She's passed out. back there. We don't know who she is. Well, now, uh, she has passed away. Very, very sad. And we don't even know who she is. So according to state police, Narcan was administered with negative results. And the stamp bag containing fentanyl and a glass smoking device was found on the ground next to, uh, the victim in the back of the vehicle. And so when, again, when they were, when they were taken into custody, they were like, Like, no, we, what, there's methamphetamine in the scar?

No. Yeah, yeah, the fentanyl is ours, but not the, yeah, the drug paraphernalia. Yeah, that's ours as well. But we got nothing to do with the math. So now that she's dead, now they're even in worse trouble, man. Going down. So rest in peace to the unidentified 57-year-old woman who was just doing a little bit of drugs, taking a ride with these two.

guys. It's so sad. So sad. Rest and peace to this unnamed female dead at the age of 57. A couple of updates for a couple of stories that we're following. The Gene Hackman death and his wife, Betsy Arachoa, and the Pope. All right, let's begin with Gene Hackman. All right, first of all, we have an update. The couple's German Shepherd named Bear, survived. Okay? They misidentified which dog died. Those bastards. We've been mourning the German Shepherd, but no,

it wasn't the German Shepherd. So, the German Shepherd bear survived along with the second dog named Nikita. But their kelpie mix Zina is the one that died.

Very, very sad. Wow. I mean, this is according to the Santa Fe Tales Pet Care facility that is involved in the surviving dog's care. So back off him, okay?

The German Shepherd is not the one who died, okay? The dog that died with Gene Hackman and his wife, Betsy Arachawa, is the Kelpie Mix Zena.

So, rest in peace to Zina. so the dog apparently died was the one that was always attached to betsy at the hip and it was a beautiful relationship wasn't it though and so uh very very sad they also um said that uh they want they want to be sure that it was not um carbon monoxide poisoning the bodies both tested negative and so we still don't know. We still don't know. The security or the utility company did an inspection. One burner on the stove in the house had a minuscule leak that could not be lethal.

And so we don't know. We don't know. And will we ever know? I don't know. I don't know. We do know that we've, been mourning the wrong dog so rest in peace to kelpie the kelpie mix zina dead with the hackman family now we have a quick pope francis update apparently he's still in the hospital he's not out and about yet i know i know weird

so apparently his overall clinical condition remains stable including heart kidney and blood valves according to the Vatican. He was put on the non-invasive mechanical ventilation a couple days ago after his big attack that he had. But as of yesterday, he was stable enough to switch to high-flow supplemental oxygen. That's put the nasal tube in your nose, right? And so now he's in stable condition, breathing with the aid of supplemental oxygen. flibental oxygen following the respiratory crisis that he had.

But when he sleeps, it's nighttime, they're going to be used the, we're going to put him on the non-invasive mechanical ventilation mask at night. So he's still, still hanging in there. The Pope is still rolling along, baby. And we are smack dab. It's Ash Wednesday. We're in Lent and Easter is coming up. I'm guessing that you could probably take some bets some way.

if the Pope is going to make it to Easter or not. And, I mean, I want him to. I want him to. But it might be a good bet if you were betting against that. But he seems to be making a comeback. With Amex Platinum, $400 in annual credits for travel and dining means you not only satisfy your travel bug, but your taste buds too. That's the powerful backing of Amex. Conditions apply.

Okay, so I'm reading a story about teleportation, and they claim in this story that teleportation will be possible by 2060. Okay. So everything that they've said so far that would be possible by a certain date, that timeline has moved up dramatically. So I'm guessing with how we are creating quantum computing and with the help of, of artificial intelligence, that number, we might be able to be teleported a lot sooner than that. So according to this, in 1998, scientists teleported the quantum state of a photon across one meter. This experiment proved that teleportation is possible at the quantum level.

Okay. Fast forward to today, and quantum teleportation is already being used for communication. If photons can be teleported, why not matter? Hello? Yeah, that's what we need to do. But it's really kind of difficult because you're talking about the human body. So, I mean, you've got quantum entanglement. When the two particles become entangled, their states are linked, meaning a change in one instantly affects the other, regardless of distance. So this phenomenon has been proven in countless experiments by exploiting entanglement. We can theoretically transfer not just information, but entire objects, opening the door for teleportation on a much larger scale. But you're talking about creating a machine that will move you from one space to another. and that means they have to break you down and then build you back up again.

That doesn't seem like an easy thing to do. I mean, we need to convert every atom into data, a task that seems insurmountable right now. But then we have, you know, quantum computing and AI. So processing such large amounts of data is becoming more feasible, according to the scientific experts. but it's not about just moving data from one place to another, but it's about breaking down and reassembling the very matter that makes up a person.

Yeah. So that means you're using nanotechnology and 3D bioprinting, which, you know, you're already building organs and tissues. You're going to reconstruct the entire human body, atom by atom. I mean, that's when you say, beam me up Scotty, and you think about Star Trek. And, you know, that's what they're doing. You're moving.

We've got to find a way to be able to move the entire body without breaking it down like that. Which, you know, is that going to come by 2060? I don't know. I think it'd be earlier than that the way things are going. So they claim by 2060, quantum computing and quantum internet will handle the massive data requirements needed for human teleportation. Quantum computers already are being developed will be able to process the enormous amounts of information required to teleport a person.

additionally artificial intelligence will play a critical role in managing the data ensuring that every atom and molecule is reconstructed uh-huh with the perfect precision ensuring safety and accuracy of course that's hello we've made great strides with that so we're just going to trust the machines to do it and we'll be there soon enough and plus i don't know they don't say anything about fat guy teleportation it's just teleportation i don't know if it's easier or the same depending on your size, right? Oh, no. You can't fit into a teleportation machine.

We do not have a fat guy size. Well, then, now we're talking about discrimination. And I won't have that in quantum computing or anything. But it would be cool. It would be cool to be able to go wherever you want to go from here to there, from there to here, from there to there, and do it in an instant. Just be teleported there.

And even if it isn't an instant with, you know, breaking down and reassembling, what is an instant? Is it seconds? Is it a minute? Is it five minutes? I don't know the answer to that. They haven't consulted me. But if you, if someone said you could walk into this room and we can teleport you to London from whatever city you're in, I mean, I'm in, I'm in, I'm in, I'm in, Dallas right now.

So we're in DFW, the Dallas-Fort Worth Metroplex. If I can walk into a room and be teleported to London in 10 minutes, would it be worth it? Maybe, depending on what they're going to charge you, because it ain't going to be free. And it's probably going to be, you know, the Tesla teleportation device.

So be ready for it. that as well. All right, let's get out of here. I'll leave you with the joke of the day. The joke of the day sent from Robert to chewing the fat at the blaze.com. Now, he prefaces this by saying, it's kind of spicy.

So, you know, clean it up if you need to. I don't think it's spicy at all. It's kind of mean. And, you know, we've had a lot of police officers in the news today. They found dead bodies in Mexico. They found druggies and, you know, a almost dead and then died body in Pennsylvania.

You know, nobody backs to blue like this program. Look, police are just doing their job. And gosh darn it, that's a very tough job. And I mean that. And I don't know how many of them do it. But they do and bless their hearts for doing it. But, you know, we do get frustrated when we get pulled over for, you know, a traffic violation that you feel like it's not.

not worthy of a violation. So here's the joke from Robert. A man was running late for work one morning, and he was speeding just a bit above the speed limit when he was coming down the backside of a bridge. And sure enough, there was a cop running radar, and he pulled the man over. Now, see, this is where you get into, like, come on, now.

Can't you just tell me to go and not give me the ticket? So the cop walks up to the man's window and says, what seems to be the rush? None of your business. I if you've got me speeding, just give me a ticket. No, that's not the joke. Never mind. The cop says, what seems to be the rush?

And the guy replies, well, I'm late for work. And I have a very important job. And the cop asks him what he does. And the guy says, well, I'm a rectum stretcher. So the cop says, wait, what, what is that? And a man says, okay, well, I'll explain. I stretch rectums for a doctor's office. And I start with a finger, and then I work up to two fingers,

and then I just keep stretching and stretching until the rectum is about six feet tall. And what the heck do you do with a six-foot hole? And well, you give him a radar gun and set them at the base of the bridge. See, because he would just turn him into, well, you understand. I'm pretty sure you're getting a ticket after that. wrecked him. Damn near killed him. Stream and subscribe to more Blaze Media content

at the blaze.com slash podcasts.