Chief Change Officer - Singapore Parliament's Pei Ling Tin: From Psychology Major to Youngest Elected Parliamentarian

Episode Date: August 2, 2024

Conquering Her Darkest Period: From Psychology Major to Parliament Victory On this week's episode of “Chief Change Officer,” Pei Ling Tin, the youngest elected Parliamentarian, recounts some of the darkest moments of her journey from being a psychology major to winning the general election. She discusses how facing biases related to age and gender has made her more resilient, both in terms of stamina and ability. Wondering about her secret sauce to success? Connect with Us: Host: Vince Chan | Guest: Tin Pei Ling Chief Change Officer: Make Change Ambitiously. A Modernist Community for Growth Progressives World's Number One Career Podcast Top 1: US, CA, MX, IE, HU, AT, CH, FI Top 10: GB, FR, SE, DE, TR, IT, ES Top 10: IN, JP, SG, AU  1.3 Million+ Streams 50+ Countries

Hi everyone, welcome to our show. We live in a world that is obsessed with making impacts, fulfilling purposes, driving sustainability, and creating greater good for humanity. I've always believed this. If you are aiming to change the humanity for the better, something impactful, sustainable, purposeful, and hopefully profitable. The first human you have to change is yourself. Every meaningful change starts with you actually step out of your comfort zone, put yourself out there, and disrupt your own life to the point where the pain many forms and shapes. One common pain point is how wise and resilient you are in taking on both praise and criticism.

When you're out there on this journey of transformation, how do you learn to tell the difference between constructive advice and bad-intentioned comment that comes from a place of fear, jealousy, misunderstanding, or ignorance. How not to be fooled by a win you get? How not to be discouraged by a loss you suffer? How not to be distracted by the failure you experience? Speaking of change, I've made my fair share. 18 to be exact. One major moment was back in 2013 when I was 40 years old. I turned down a promising government job to take a leap of faith.

I published my first book and joined Chicago Booth for my second MBA. That's where I met Pei Ling. Our class had a meaningful mix of personalities. Pei Ling was among the youngest in our class. I was one of the most experienced. But by then, I already had over 15 years of work experiences in the business world and a seasoned MBA graduate from Yale. Yet, we all came together to be part of something special and monumental. We are the legacy class graduating in Singapore in the history of Chicago Booth, which was prepared to move its campus to Hong Kong. Pei-Ling and I were part of a six-person committee, organizing all sorts of special activities and graduation events. We spent time inside and outside the classroom,

in Singapore as well as in Chicago. Over the last 10 years, as a classmate, as an alum, as a friend, I've observed her growth. In my eyes, Pei Ling is someone who embodies the core essence of change, all the things I've mentioned earlier. Her story is a powerful reminder of what it means to own the change, to face the pain, and to emerge more resilient on the other side. In this episode, Pei-Ling is going to share her incredible journey from psychology to politics. Why did she give up on pursuing clinical psychology? The year 2011 was a life-changing year for her, but in her own words, it was also the darkest period in her life.

Facing in-person and social media attacks, Dealing with biases relating to our age and gender. More importantly, how did she navigate through those challenges, make peace with them, and take control of her life post-election? Becoming the chief change officer of her own story? Let's dive in and find out. Welcome, Pei Ling. Thank you for joining me on this podcast. Well, thank you, Vince. It's really nice to reconnect. Before you got into politics, you were in psychology. Why did you give up on that? Yeah, I was the youngest elected member of parliament for two terms.

So I'm in my third term now. I majored in psychology in university. That would be out of the norm amongst my classmates from high school, what we call junior college. Actually, most of my classmates would have gone to engineer or science, probably would have chosen. But somehow, I got really passionate about mental health and I wanted to do something about it.

So I chose to major in psychology. And so for the large part of my time in college, in university, I was solely focused on trying to achieve this aspiration to become a clinical psychologist. Whether it's from the internship that I sought out, forums that I organized, so on and so forth, it was with that goal in mind. But then a few things in that sense compelled me to have to change path. One was that my father had a mild heart attack and as the only child i had to take over this small coffee business that was sustaining the family so i had to to run it for some time so i had to take some time off college in between and even after my father recovered

the stamina was just not the same and so he had to retire earlier than expected. And so that meant that I could not continue to pursue a clinical program, which is actually required to practice in Singapore. So I had to rethink. So that's the resource part of it. For about a year, I had to think very hard. If I can't continue to pursue this, then what could I do? In the end, I distilled into two points. One is what do I look for in a career? And two is how can I continue to pursue my passion? For the passion part,

because I've already been in the grassroots, I've been already volunteering in the community for a few years by then, I realized that for mental health, I could continue to pursue this course within the community as a volunteer and still create a hopefully positive impact on others in the community by raising awareness, by availing channels. But then how did you get into business consulting? In terms of career, I hope it's dynamic. It's people facing new challenges all the time. Then that really opens up a lot of options. So shortly after graduation, I'm thankful and I think I was fortunate to have made it into Ernst & Young Advisory.

So basically that's business consulting. I never thought that I would pursue this, but I guess after joining, I learned to like it. It was a very good first job because there's a lot of fundamentals that you learn in a role like this, from project management to discipline. Because of the nature of the work, you really have to develop framework thinking. One of my bosses used to say, from zero to hero in no time. So it forces you to pick up things

and learn different concepts along the way. That is exhilarating because it helps you to gain breath. It always kept me on my toes. So you got into business consulting. Sounds like a good first job in your life. But then what happened when you decided to get into politics? I was in this for a few years.

And then I was asked whether I would be open to running in the general election. I was eventually fielded under the ruling party in the general election of 2011. That was quite a pivotal year for me, to be honest. It was my first time participating as a candidate in the general election. The overall political atmosphere was electrifying but also very tough for us because there were a few issues that had to be addressed. As the youngest candidate from the ruling party, as a female, as a newbie in that sense, there were considerable challenges personally for me. That probably was the darkest period of my life. For me personally, because there were a lot of doubts and criticisms.

And it was really very challenging. Very, very trying. Just even to go through the campaigning period, even after the election itself, It was life-changing. Would you say the move into politics was a big move for you? And you were a student in psychology, so let me flip the table to ask you about your own psychology. How did you feel about this change? Really depends on how you see it.

I actually was a volunteer in the grassroots and political party member since second year of university. So I had some exposure to what being an MP is like in Singapore. So in that sense, I didn't have a root shock. I do have some inkling of what the demands would be. But having gone through the general election itself, having gone through what some described as baptism of fire for me, that was quite a tremendous change. At that point, because I was still considered

fairly junior and young career-wise, I was also new to the constituency that I was fielded in. I had to choose between my career development, my professional development and doing a good job, at least to be responsible enough

to build up within the constituency. Professionally, at that point in time, I wasn't a senior, so I couldn't quite delegate. I would have to do most of the work and fairly so, fairly so. But if I had to take time away from work and focus on serving the people, then that wouldn't be fair to my colleagues or my bosses or to the clients. So in the end, I realised that being elected is a very sacred duty. I owe it to the voters who voted for me. At that point, I decided to quit my job at Ernst & Young and just focus on my duties as a parliamentarian.

Because I was a newbie, right? So I was new to the constituency, I was new to the role as an MP. And I really wanted to devote myself to that. I spent the time to understand the constituency, to understand the issues that my constituents faced, from bread and butter to municipal to aspirational type of issues. Honestly, looking back, the most precious asset to me in the past 12 years as a parliamentarian would be the bonds that I've forged with the people within Macpherson.

Every time when I see our elderly, them smiling at me, we ask about each other, them hugging me. It feels like family and that's precious. And I've also watched kids grow up and that's precious. And so these are, to me, invaluable. So I think that the change, partly because of circumstances, partly due to my own choice, there were adjustments. The nature of work is different. I have to spend a lot of time on the ground.

As a parliamentarian, to be honest, there is no so-called official working hours. It's 24-7 every day. You're always on call? Always, always. Yeah, so it's either you're on the ground in parliament or on emails. So it's really super, super stretchy in that sense. But I think it's fulfilling. It's fulfilling. You touched upon a bit about pre-election and after you being the youngest, also being a woman. So when you look back about your experience, how did you try to make peace with them, but at the same time, overcome these issues in order to do your job, also to take good care of your own mental health. Yeah, the fact that the political party, in this case, our ruling party, PAP, decided to field me.

I was in my 20s and I was a female and that they decided to field me in the election to show that they are progressive enough to create opportunities and that space for someone young and a young female to rise up and be a representative for the people. Because it is an important responsibility when you are elected as a parliamentarian. So I think that's one. At that point in time, it's also managing certain preconceived notions or stereotypes that people may have of certain gender and age. So to me, the big challenge that I faced was age. I was only in my 20s and even though I already had seven years of grassroots experience by then. I guess track record wise, people still do not have a clear grasp of what I have to offer. Damn, I'm young, I'm new. And I think a lot of people will be thinking, who are you? Do you really understand my problems? Are you able to, you know, solve it even if you do understand. And some also felt that

I was riding on the coattail of a former prime minister, Mr Goh Chok Tong, his emeritus. So there were all these criticisms. And I think this was the main doubt about me. So online, anything that I post

on my own social media, I get thousands of responses. Not so nice comments. And then on other platforms, Anything that I post on my own social media, I get thousands of... Responses. Not so nice comments. Yeah. And then on other platforms, other online forums, etc. And there are people who fabricate stories about me.

For example, they said that I have this boyfriend and I dumped him because he was fat. All sorts of things. And then... Well, you're actually married at that point. Yeah. And all these things were like so untrue and various things,

right? It was very overwhelming. Absolutely overwhelming. I remember every day I'll go home and cry at the end of the day. The next morning,

I have to like, hmm, okay, I have to focus again, go down to the constituency, go listen to the residents, constituents, understand their problems,

try to help them, so on and so forth. And this is every day. And let's just repeat for quite some time. I was under quite a lot of stress. Then in terms of gender, actually less so. But I did have a handful, a very small number of more mature men. We call them uncles.

And then they actually asked me, you're a woman, what do you know of the problems we men face? So I got those comments before, but I don't think they were meant to be mean, but it was genuinely like, do you really understand me? Fast forward, I would say that in the end, there's no shortcut to addressing these concerns that constituents have or that people have of me back then. It was really through constant engagement, listening, understanding, working alongside them,

trying to help them over time, building up trust, building up chemistry, showing my sincerity and my work through real actions, I think is the main critical success factor in that sense that helped to convince them that, hey, you can trust me, I'm here for you. And I think that's also the main reason why we have managed to forge bonds over the years. In today's world, if you look at ageism at workplace, many media focus on so-called the older end of the population spectrum, especially when you talk about like tech company innovation,

over 40 or 50. According to a lot of media, these more mature, more experienced or so-called older people, they are less tech savvy. Now, that is one narrative. But I always believe that ageism is not limited to the mature people.

It's that kind of both ways. Or the so-called younger, which you just share your story with me. I recall in my days when I worked in finance in some of the biggest firms in the world, men-dominated, white guys, and being the Asian, I worked overseas, I'm 20-something or early 30s. They may not say it in my face, but I can feel that they have their own in quotation reservation. I can relate to when you say, but then in my situation, I have one less worry, which is social media. Your political career actually started around a time that this

social media thing got more and more popular. So promise what, you got a lot of comments, responses, like every day, every second. So, that is the kind of pressure that an irregular human cannot just simply ignore it. You have to kind of deal with it and judge what is relevant, what's not relevant, and what is actually noise, what is actually a sincere comment. I guess you learned the lessons along your way. Yeah, definitely, definitely. Coming out of that period, it did accelerate my personal growth

and even emotionally, psychologically, I would say that today, I'm probably a lot more resilient. Looking back, even though that was the darkest period for me personally, I'm actually thankful for having gone through that experience

because it really helped me grow. And it also gave me a story to tell, which I hope would be useful for others who may have their own battles to fight. If it's of any consolation at all,

hopefully it will be helpful for them. I must say, coming back to the bias that you mentioned earlier, a lot of people would assume that age correlates with maturity. But maybe I can just share one

example. This was what happened in 2011. So that was the first general election that I took part in. I remember on polling day, that was the day that people went, goes down to vote, right? And then for us, we could actually go from polling station to polling station.

We can't get involved. We can just monitor and inspect, right? And so, I stepped out of one of the polling station with my election agent.

And as we walked out, a pair of sisters walk in the opposite direction. And I remember they were, I think in their 50s. As they walked past, they were heckling at me. They were chanting like something that was meant to mock at me. And I was thinking to myself, I mean, this felt a bit like high school.

I didn't actually experience it in high school. As that happened, I was thinking to myself, wow, what just happened? I mean, head over heart. I did not think that I did anything wrong. I did not hurt anyone. I did not commit a crime. Yeah, I was young.

Maybe I wasn't very polished, but I don't think I did anything wrong. And all I wanted to do was to do something meaningful. And yeah, it was quite a moment. I can definitely see this scene. Going back to some of the story you just shared, I guess over time, you change people's heart through your actions. Actions speak louder than words. As a public figure, you could, of course,

spend your time responding to every single comment. That obviously is a waste of time because a lot of comments may not be relevant. At the same time, silence is golden or I would say silence

is equivalent to absence of noise. So if there's so much noise, you just learn to recognize what is noise, what is helpful to absence of noise. So if there's so much noise, you just learn to recognize what is noise, what is helpful to you, and how you respond, and how you respond sometimes with words, sometimes through actions. Time would give you the benefit of doubt.

Eventually you grow and people see it. That's the message you try to send to the world through the growth of your career. Yeah, I totally agree. In our next episode, Pei-Ling will share why she chose to pursue an MBA degree despite her busy life as a politician. She will take us through her journey of balancing different roles and identities, including being a mother to two kids and dealing with what she calls mother's guilt. Plus, she's passionate about tackling

a range of social and business challenges to help build a stronger society. It's gonna be another compelling conversation you don't want to miss. Thanks for listening. See you in the next episode.