Chilluminati Podcast - Episode 120 - Boardgame Trips to the Void

Episode Date: September 29, 2021

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to stay on that piece of property you own. Whatever your needs are, we're here to help. Come visit a Motorsportsland RV Center or motorsportsland.com today and let Motorsportsland help you get away. Hello, everybody, and welcome back to the Chilumanati podcast, episode 120. As always, I am one of your hosts, Mike Martin,

joined by my two co-hosts, Jesse Cox and Alex Fasciani. Yes, ma'am. The Spangler and Venkman of California. Uh-oh, whoa, which one's which? I would say Venkman is Alex and you are Spangler. I'll take it. I mean, all right. You're the science guy all about.

I guess that makes me stance, right? You're Ray Winston. Wait, I could be Winston too. I feel like I'm more of a Ray. I feel like you started the whole show, so you can't be Winston. Yeah, there's no way. It's true.

Are you saying our Winston is still out there? Someone who just needs a job is still out there. Maybe you could be our Winston. Head to patreon.com. And maybe you could be our Winston. Probably not, but you never know. You never know what could happen to patreon.com. It's a great website that you should go check out

because if you do, you know what? It's going to keep us putting out episodes. And that's really what this is all about is just us being able to do this instead of getting real jobs. And that's much real. Back to you. That's all you need. That's absolutely all you need.

I know I promised everybody, all the listeners, we were going to be doing a game this week. However, I've made a kind of decision to bump that one week so we can do October proper. I think it'll be a good long multiparter to really give the the spook of Halloween. So instead, we're going to do something a little lighter and a little bit more fun.

We're going to be doing some reader stories. However, I have one question before we start and it's for Alex. Oh, is your apartment haunted? Why do you ask? Because your girlfriend on Twitter has talked about seeing shadow people in your apartment. Yeah, so we've been having some,

we've been having some. Get out of town. I don't believe you for a minute. What? We've been having some, we've been having some weird stuff. I don't typically, I'm not, I don't want to jump to ghosts right away because you never know what it could be.

Sure, sure. Yeah, we won't jump right to ghosts. I'm just curious if you don't mind sharing, we can always chop this out if you don't. Yeah, no, it's fine. So here's, so here's what's up. So this started like a couple of months ago when we had this like total freak out

when like somebody moved Kelly's charger from one plug to another. Like I have my own charger. So it's not like I did it. We're the only two people who live in the house and her charger moved from like by her bed where it always is to like another place in the house, plugged into another.

It wasn't like she ripped it out as she walked by and it flung across the house. It was like plugged into another plug somewhere else in the house. So that was the first thing because it's a small thing, but it was legitimate. Like we're a very honest people with each other and it was a very inexplicable thing

that was really disturbing to us. And then now I've been having like really bad insomnia. I'm sure other people are also stressed out about existing on this planet at this time. And I, you know, I'm up at night and I hear like, sometimes I hear people talking or like like people in my house talking and then I'll see like a little like just like a thing

kind of cause I don't know if you've ever been in my apartment like in the back half of the apartment, but maybe you have, but like I have like a hallway that's basically like just like a square room that's like a door to every room in my house. And that's where we keep seeing this thing is like in this room and we keep hearing like a woman talking all the time.

I don't like, I'll hear her at three in the morning. I'll hear her at 10 in the morning. Anytime that I'm alone and I will think that Kelly has come home from work or I'll think she's, I'll literally like turn off what I'm looking at or listening to because I'm like, what? And she'll do the same thing and it's always the same thing.

And it's, you know, it's happening. It's happening. I'm not, I don't know what it is. It's creeping us out, but I haven't seen any sort of like, you know, ghostly maiden who's waiting for her captain to come home or anything like that. Just seen some creepy things lately and it's been spooking us the shit out.

You know, coincidentally, we've been watching a lot of nukes top fives lately, which if you haven't seen, you're missing out as a shilluminati adjacent human being out there in the world, you should go check out nukes top five. It's mostly crap, but it's great. And I think we all know it's, I think he knows what's up to, you know what I mean?

Like it's not, it's not, it's not deadly serious. It's pretty good. I like it. That's a, that's pretty creepy, man. I mean, I am going to, I wonder, I mean, I'm going to be there in a couple of weeks more or less. So maybe I'll hear some voices along with y'all. I honestly hope you do because I would love to like.

I hope I do too. Yeah. I'm like really, really crossing my fingers. I would love to like get some corroboration from like somebody who isn't from my house. You know what I mean? Yeah, that's, yeah. Cause we got the live show coming up October 26th, everybody.

And yeah, I'm going to be staying there and I'm okay. I didn't expect a potential haunted stay, but you know, that's like, you've got very textbook, kind of like passive bizarre, just kind of occurrences again. I don't want to use the word haunting because there's no, you don't really have hard evidence, you know? Yeah.

Then there's no like persona, you know what I mean? There's no like, I don't know. Like a lot of people who have like family hauntings, there's like a whole fucking story around. Yeah. I wish we knew somebody like that. I would love to like. The ghost of Jeffrey the third.

Yeah. I would love to talk to somebody who we know, who has like a lifelong haunting who's like local to me. You know what I mean? Yeah. I love that. But yeah, I don't know. It's, it's been a creepy thing that's been happening

for a couple of weeks. If you don't mind. We'll do an Alex update as we go. Okay. I can't wait until you find out that it's just like a lady living in your house. I want you to know that. That would be even worse.

My house is not big enough for that type of thing. Like Dave, like some ladies living in the ceiling and drinking coax and shit. I live on the top floor. If she's in the ceiling, she's standing on the goddamn roof. I feel like I can see, I can basically see from one side of my house to the other.

There's no corners. There's no turning. I'm in here all the time. There's a pandemic on. I don't go anywhere. If this lady's in here, she is fucking Jack Scanlon. She's in the walls.

She is stealing your stuff. You, like ghost is the least scary option. I'm telling you, there was someone in that home and she's like, she's laying my children. She's laying in my couch like Danny DeVito. She's like, the only thing I can, the only place she could literally fit in this house.

Then one day she'll be birthed from that couch. Like, get her out of here. Yeah. Yeah. God. Oh, gross. All right. Well, keep us updated. We got, we got some great stories. I got to say, you guys have been leaving us

so many dreams, like to interpret more than I can interpret into a single episode. Otherwise, it's just a dream episode. We've got two pretty decent dreams. I'm ready to read for you. Do you really want to listen to dreams for an hour, folks? That's what I'm saying. Let us know in the in the in the in the subreddit.

If you if you're going to be in the subreddit, you know, they're going to say, they're going to say, no, I never. Dude, that's the thing I always think people are going to say. But at the same time, you know, maybe the audience is the best person to ask for what we should do next all the time. You are absolutely correct. All right.

So we're going to start before we get to the dreams. A couple of short, slightly creepy, spooky, slight ghost stories. And I'm going to hand this first story off to Jesse to start us. Yeah, you're going to be our our man at the start of our week. OK. Welcome.

To listeners stories. Go, go. Like a crow just came in my apartment. You guys would never believe it. Yeah, you have to have some like the like the old witch, like. You got to have a more fucking sound effect. Yeah. Don't know what that you remember doing in black episode

and that guy who kept his whole room like a haunted house. Well, he lived with his dad in the upstairs floor. And he did all the he ran that man. It's like Dark Shadows, the TV show. Yeah, yeah. What I'm thinking of. All right, take it away, Jesse. This is from Click Hell Spawn.

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with the spacious new Sequoia. They all come with standard features and some sweet, sweet tech. Check out this versatile line up at Toyota dot com. Toyota, let's go places. I've always been a skeptic, but we weaned from that viewpoint. Thanks to it. But have. Oh, boy. You know, I'm a startling beginning. I've always been a skeptic.

But if weaned from that viewpoint, thanks to experiences. From first one being when I lived in a house that was well over 100 years old when we had moved in. I've always heard creaking and what sounds like footsteps. But I could easily attribute that to the house settling. What I can't contribute to is the faint conversational whispers always coming from the second story when I was on the ground floor.

This could have been explained away, but one morning in my early teens, I was alone in my house and on the top of my bunk bed, I heard rustling. Oh, that would be the worst. I brushed it off as a possibly mice moving about. Yeah, we had mice until I heard the heavy breathing and persisted even when I held my breath, thinking it was just me and I was crazy. But the breathing persisted undeniably human. Second experience.

Well, that was it. That was his first experience. How bad experience end? It sounds like my stop. It sounds like mine. It's just, you know, it's nothing to get too excited about. You know what I mean? It's just a what the what are you talking? Maybe maybe there's something when you get a haunted house, Jesse,

maybe like part of it, like a mosquito numbing your skin before a bite. It dulls your panic senses. And you know, we're scared. Like where was the breathing? You know what I mean? Yeah, on the top bunk. I'm like he was in the bottom bunk. Yes, in the bottom bunk. And then someone above you is like,

and your kids help me. What is that? That's not breathing. That's not breathing. That's creepy. That's a witch that's dying to COVID. I don't know. That's that demon breath. That's a demon breath.

Yes, Zoolander. That's Zoolander working in the mines. I don't know what that is. That's an Adam Sandler. Demon breath. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, that's that's demon breath. That would honestly be super fun.

If that if that if I started here, now while I was in the shower, I'd be out of my house, Nick. I'd be like that dude in Jackass when the dude falls to the ceiling and he runs like four blocks down. That'd be me. I wouldn't stop running until I like woke up out of like a fucking trip. I feel like now. It's like David Rich.

That's fucking part of that. You're telling me. That shit comes out from behind the dumpster and that guy's like, oh, like that's you're telling me this story. It's like, I heard someone in my bunk on the top bunk. And then it's like. And so the next time they see there's no end. That wasn't it wasn't like it wasn't like he was like hello.

And the voice was like, hello, I'm a ghost. You know what I mean? It's just, you know, there's no like and then three hours later, I looked and there's nothing there or I finally got out of bed. Like if there was something there, he would be like and then there was a headless woman up there with who's breathing out of the hole in it. Oh, so just me talking to my dog.

That's how I talk to Wallace. It's me and my pal were smoking a few bowls and is in his at the time very old apartment basement. There was only one entrance to this basement. It was locked. We were quite stoned, but both of us saw a white orb. We both instantly laughed it off. This is a smoke, buddy, pretty baked.

Not long after a soil pot we have not touched began to shake as it was as if it was nudge. Once again, we chucked it up to us being stoned, but still freaked out. So we left the basement. We finished indulging on that you were like, I'm probably just hallucinating this. That's crazy.

Smoking a bowl of shrooms. We finished indulging on the stairs that led to the basement and we heard a violent crash, violent crashing of what sounded like lumber and stuff violently thrown about. There was lumber kept there, I guess. Oh, OK. Later, the same night, the niece of my friend that experienced this with me went to open the door

that led to the basement stairwell, where we had our puff heard the noise. She said she felt someone pull it shut. The context is she she as young and we told her nothing about her. She is young and we told her nothing about her experience. And that's where it ends. Yeah. So that's a straight up just like that is a new story. That's a nukes top five right there.

Bam. A little sprinkle of spook over your your evening dessert. Yeah. Yeah. Bam. Alex, you can take the next one. OK, this is called Late Night Fruits by Yoyo 2312. I'm a nurse and I used to work at an aged care facility doing night shifts. It was a small facility with around 20 residents or so on the night shift. There was only one person on shift and another person who would sleep and only be woken up for repositioning of residents or emergencies.

Sometimes it got a little creepy being alone in a big dark facility or walking around a corner and finding a wandering resident suddenly appear right terrifying. God, that would be the worst. It's literally like living ghosts. Yeah. But that was mostly in terms of late night frights. We had this glass display cupboard and they would change the items on display once a month. Once there was a display of World War Two memorabilia,

Australia Day decorations, Christmas decorations, etc. This particular shift, there was a display of different dolls. Some of them had been by the residents and others were collectibles or sentimental. And one of the dolls was very creepy looking. And every time I passed the display cabinet in the corridor on my rounds, I would shudder when I see it. The light in the display cabinet was always on in an otherwise dark corridor with only minimal light from exit signs.

The doll had dark skin and native African dress and face paint with colorful beads around her neck in her braided hair. Something about it just made me uncomfortable. Being on my own, I worked myself up so much about it that I would scare myself and jump at any sound. The next time I walked past it, I decided to pull my phone out and snapchat a video of it to my friend who also worked nights. I almost immediately got a reply snap from her, saying, oh, my God,

what the fuck is that? I replied something along the lines of, yeah, I know how creepy is that doll? She replied, no, not the doll. What was that dark shadow behind you? She could apparently see my reflection in the glass of the cabinet and saw something dark standing behind me. Nope. She said she replayed the video and saw it again. However, neither of us could go back and watch it again due to disappearing from snapchat.

Safe to say, I turned on all the lights in the facility after that and was so freaked out. A resident had passed away in the room directly adjacent to the display cabinet the day prior to this day. I'm not sure what it was, but she was adamant that there was something behind me and she's not one to make stuff up. If it was a resident, I'm sure she would have been able to see that from the light coming from the cabinet. And since I had just come from that direction,

I would have noticed if a resident was awake. This was not the only weird experience I had while doing nights there, but I'll save those stories for another day. Oh, a sequel. Oh, well, tease. I like that. Yeah, I like that. That was good. A shadow being is always creepy, but I think turning around having just like a 90 year old woman just standing there

Oh, I know, staring at you. Yeah, I just I would jump. Have you seen the kid dancing? And then there's like another kid behind him. Have you seen that one? Yes. It's just no, thanks. Dude, it's like it's so scary. It's like you hear this other kid laugh and there's like this kid in the darkness behind him and he kid the kid sees the I mean, it is.

What is this? It's a it's like one of those ghost videos that like goes around on the Internet. It is so good. Maybe I'll show it to you. Maybe like, yeah, I feel like we got to like reactive footage at the live show. We'll see. Well, we'll see what's up. Yeah, we've got some ideas. We've got some ideas. All right, I got this next one. This one's a dream.

This one is simply titled Board Game Trip to the Void by Loop Cat. Hello, fellow Chiluminati and Chiluminati crew. I was going through the notes app on my phone just now and was reminded of a very strange and unsettling dream that I had a while back, which I feel would be the perfect for a dream interpretation. For the sake of reference, I'm more or less a Jesse. I believe that statistically speaking, we probably ain't alone in the universe, but I also need concrete evidence evidence for anything paranormal,

trippy or unexplainable. I like that. I'm a type. Yes, you are now a type. Yeah, literally call themselves Jesse's. Like that's their thing. Just like a skeptic. Is that what that is? No, no, no. They call themselves a Jess.

Skeptic. Sexy Jesse. It's a it's a skeptic with a certain cosmopolitan flame. Exactly. When they call themselves an Alex, then what are they calling themselves? Patreon.com slash Chiluminati pot. OK, well, I'm Matt. We'll just go back to the story. But if I'm faced with it, but if I find myself face to face with something sparkly, glowing, bearded or white bearded white man when I die, and I guess I'll concede that religion was actually onto something

mentioning these things because I forgot the LOL. You forgot the important LOL. Sorry, LOL. Ha ha ha. LOL. Mentioning these things because though this dream starts off a little goofy, it gets pretty existential by the end of it. And personal perspective is always good for dream interpretations. So without further ado, the dream starts off with me watching

some kind of pro battleship tournament. Yes, the board game. Hell yeah. Right, I can't. I've never. Sweet. I've never had such a boring imagination where battleship tournament is where I would put myself. It's tight. We're talking about dope.

A bunch of adults are challenging some super smart kid and all getting their asses kicked. The final competitor cheated in some way sabotage the kids board so that it doesn't work properly. The kid has a Eureka moment and runs off to get his old and this is in quotes prototype board as a backup so he doesn't lose on a technicality. This board has a has a move programmed into it that'll let him win.

This is this is a very detailed. Yeah, what? This is like an anime about battleship, competitive battleship. It's like a sports anime. Yeah. And then in parentheses, it says this move is technically in the rules and is legal, but modern boards just don't have it built in for some reason. So yeah, really goofy ass movie plot shit. The kid comes back with his board, sets it up,

then realizes all of his cameras need to be readjusted. It's all being recorded and broadcasted. So there are like three cameras shoved up on his face in the boards. The cameras are all super bulky, but only because they're on huge rigs that keep them stationary. The rigs have all kinds of handles and gears for the positioning and focus and stuff. I noticed when the kid readjusted them, he got up to do something else. He bumped one of the cameras, messed it up again, and he didn't catch it.

So I hopped on it to readjust it for him. He looked over like, man, what are you doing? But I just told him I noticed it was messed up and that I knew how to work it because my parents were photographers and in real life, they actually are photographers, he notes. He kind of just scoffed like, yeah, right, go ahead. I remember looking through the viewfinder and it was sort of old timey for some reason, like it was a modern function and camera.

But for some reason, it was in like grainy black and white. Not only that, but when I focused on the kid, he now looked like an older man. Not like old old, but like a weathered 60 to 70 year old like that, dude from Dear Evan Hansen, who looks like he's about 36 years old when he's in high school somehow. Yeah, I imagine something along those lines. He also had slight Einstein without hair vibes. Just as I started to question it, an explosion went off

in the direction the camera was facing. What people start? Yeah, just as they started questioning what's going on, an explosion happens. Oh, shit. People's people started freaking out, being like, oh, my God, what happened? Did you get that on camera? I didn't hear who said it, but I got the impression that it was the kid's manager or something who was only looking at it from the perspective of this would make for great footage. I told him, no, I was focusing on the kid. So I tried to pan the camera up to find the explosion.

Just as I did, another one went off this time even closer. This whole thing was taking place outdoors in a small town or city. Everything was set up in an alley right next to a small parking area between buildings, not like a rundown alley. The whole area was just actually pretty tidy and nice. My dreams are also usually very detailed. So I remember the buildings having having brickwork and murals and posters and stuff. The explosions could could be seen from between the buildings,

but the lower buildings in the distance prevented us from seeing exactly what got hit. It was still a pretty clear view, though, in a weird way, like the buildings were positioned perfectly for us to see what was coming. After the second explosion, we started to back up like, oh, this is going to be a problem. But weirdly, I wasn't feeling stressed out. He writes questioningly or she writes questioningly. Only when another one landed across the street and somehow didn't kill us was I like, yeah, no, we need to leave now.

Just as we all started backing up through the alley, I heard a jet flying towards us. I look up, saw it and looked back down at where we were. Suddenly, the alleyway changed and we had apparently somehow been doing everything on top of a US tank and M1A1 Abrams to be specific. Remember that for your interpretation. OK, Jesse, it's an M1A1 Abrams tank. Yeah. Can you write that down? I'm literally, this is such a long story.

I'm literally taking notes. Yes. Yes. I only had a moment to think, oh, they must be going after military targets. They're just going to hit us next problem. They're going to hit us next, probably. Weirdly, I still wasn't feeling stressed out at all. Just as I finished that thought, the jet flew super low overhead and dropped three bombs directly on us. I was able to watch the first one hit the tank straight on.

And I remember seeing the other two pass just by my waist as they fell. Only in that very last second did my brain start to shift into fear mode. Everything instantly turned black and I was just screaming at the top of my lungs. I didn't stop. I was able to look up and look around. I realized it was only black because I was staring straight down at the floor. But then I started looking around and flailing my arms in sheer panic. Notice that myself and the other objects were white, not glowing white,

very much like black, a black and white fleer looking, which is like an infrared camera. It's always now his dream has now transformed into a fleer camera vision. Is this something I should write down? A player camera is like one of those cameras. Like when you're looking at somebody like bombing people in a country and they don't want it to seem like awful is they show you the FLIR footage. So it's like or or any UFO footage.

Yeah, I'll let you know. I don't I don't know how to interpret that. OK, cool. No problem. Yeah, basically, where black represented cold and white represented hot. It wasn't a clear effect either. Myself and the objects I could see were a distinct yet dull white, but there was enough inconsistency in our textures that we still had patches of darker spots all over us, if that makes any sense.

Just think like a gritty texture. As I was panicking, my body still screaming as I mentally absorbed my surroundings. I realized I was in a small bathroom with the door opening to an adjacent room. I hadn't moved from that spot, but I was immediately aware that I was dead and in an afterlife. Not only that, but those two connecting rooms were all that existed for me. I also somehow instinctively knew that even though there was a door in the other room, it led to nowhere, like a hotel room

and it's adjoining bathroom, nothing more. The bathroom was furnished just like a bathroom, a standing shower in the left corner, a sink and mirror in the right corner in front of me, a toilet to my back left and a cabinet to my right. Toilet to the left cabinet to the right, Jesse. I'm working on it. I'm taking notes. Yes, I suggest he's like sweating as he's scribbling. There's so much to store. I don't know how many pieces together.

The other room was very much like a hotel room, but with more personalized furnishings, a large double wide bed. Nightstands with lamps in a phone, clothes in random belongs, strewn about. Make sure it's strewn about, Jesse, strewn about. Yeah, some plants in a very large or they this person's clothes or someone's this hotel room with with personalized furnishings. Yeah, we'll go with that. We'll go with it's it's probably their clothes would be my guess.

Oh, boy. OK. And I think we're still in like FLIR. We're in FLIR vision. Yeah, we're in FLIR town. Random belonging strewn about some plants in a very large TV stand that sprawled the majority of the wall opposite the bed. Imagine a large flat screen in the center with numerous square nooks surrounding it, each filled with various knickknacks. All of this in the monochrome tones of a void.

I was still screaming. The lighting was just so strange how everything was black, but but objects were marked with white. It felt somehow felt like there was a very weak light coming from nowhere that faintly illuminated everything. But that was but that I was technically in the dark, not quite like a horror movie, but something about it unnerved me greatly. Like I somehow instantly understood the circumstances,

but I still have no idea where I was or if I was all alone. One of the last things I remember thinking was is this what happened to everyone? We're each given a tiny little hotel like set of rooms to exist in after we're dead. Honestly, it might not be too bad. It's like the plot of a Doctor Who episode. I'm pretty sure. Yeah, yeah. Black Mirror asking a lot of ways, too. You know, your only, you know, a visually outside world is a TV.

Yeah, a shitty hotel and a TV. That hotel that you stay in every time you go to a convention in like some town that's not a major city and you're just like, this is the same room. Why is Teen Titans and Gumball on? Like, are there more TV shows than that? I don't know that's very, very that's too true. It felt mocking in a way like we weren't given some grand afterlife or even just snuffed out of existence,

but instead just left in an isolated cell like this alone and afraid. As that fear kept setting in and I continued screaming, I woke up IRL and was pretty immediately awake with the feeling still fresh in my mind, not actually screaming, thankfully. So there you have it. My board game trip to the to the void. If this is being read in the podcast, then submit your unbiased interpretations now because the rest of this post includes my own thoughts.

It's very short. There's not much left. It's been a while since this dream occurred. Do you guys want to give me interpretation now? I just want to hear the rest of this. I think we should jump in with ours first before we. OK, what is your interpretation before we hear this person's final thoughts on this extremely bizarre battleship board game nightmare? All right, here we go.

This is a bless everyone for tolerating this because this is going to be gibberish. All right, board games, if you are playing a board game or you're witnessing a board game, it is it's a symbol of competition, right? It is attempting to outdo someone at something, right? Like the base level, that's what it's about. And so this the idea of this board game, this person, like going really hard at the board game and trying really hard. It could either represent the author of this story

or someone in this person's life being very competitive and trying to outdo them. The old man of that you're like peeking through and seeing the old man. Old man and dreams notoriously are about gaining knowledge or wisdom, things like that. So an old man in a dream is like, you know, it's like you're perhaps it's associated with the competitive nature is you're finding out information like a forbidden knowledge or something that will give you the advantage. An explosion is straight up just something destructive

or impactful in your life. So I mean, you know, we could get it real deep, but maybe it's order of operations. Maybe it's like there is something in your life that you're trying to do better than someone else and you're seeking some impactful knowledge that will help you get ahead. And the easiest thing I had to look this one up, though, but an Abrams tank signifies decision making

that is defensively expressing power. That's a tank. I mean, yeah, that's a tank. Yeah. Yeah. So I think that also relates to the previous stuff, which is like, you know, you're making a decision about how to like do better at something than other people and you're seeking the ability to do that, but you're also in like a defensive position for whatever reason. But the good news is the bathroom, like when you come out the other side of all this, the bathroom bathrooms in general are about detoxifying and cleansing

and, you know, purifying your body, you know, basically like when you mention the toilet, right, that's pooping, that's getting rid of stuff in your body. Oh, yeah, our that's like cleansing the outside of your body. So it's about purification of yourself. And then a hotel is a transitionary thing, right? No, like the idea of living at a hotel is not something you do forever. Unless you're super rich having this dream, unless you're like Lindsay Lohan having this dream, it means that it's transitive.

But you own property somewhere and you just have to stay at hotels. The idea of being at a hotel is you're not supposed to be there for a long time. So it's like you're like going through it. So you come out the other side in a place where you're like, I'm going to be here for a little bit, but I'm going to like get better. And then the clothes on the floor, I had to look this one up too, because I have no idea what this means. But apparently it signifies is it signifies losing yourself.

So maybe you lost yourself. You walked in the room. There's clothes on the floor and it's like, got to pick that shit up. I don't know. Did you lose yourself in trying to outdo someone and in your search for the knowledge to do so lost to you were forced to become defensive? And now only once you're through it all, do you see that you need to cleanse yourself of those worries?

Oh, shit, yourself up again and move on with your life. Oh, shit. Look at that. That's $100 for that therapy session. Thank you very much. Yeah, let's put in their interpretation and we'll see how we feel. It's been a while since this dream occurred. So unfortunately, I don't remember the exact mindset I was in at the time.

But the short version is that there's a ton of stress in my life due to still living with family, all of whom are very unstable and prone to verbal outbursts and abusive tendencies on undiagnosed, unmedicated mental illness, very stressful environment, not many options in terms of leaving, not to mention this dream occurred during the year of our plague lord 2020, which only add to the ambient stress. To fight to say my personal interpretation is that many of the events and of this dream can be attributed to such things as daily IRL stress

or even lack thereof because I'm so used to the nonsense, the sudden and explosive nature of arguments, the constant drain of always being the only one who's calm and reasonable enough to be aware of all this and the never ending fear of being stuck in a soul sucking void of an environment for the rest of my life. Or, you know, maybe it was aliens beaming theta waves into my brain while I slept at night. Yeah, maybe. Yeah, I will never rule that particular one out.

And I might even be on that side of with you on the other out there doing it. Yeah, yeah. I'm hoping he's getting theta waves. He wants. Oh, God, God, that would be so great if you were getting theta waved. I did say this would get extremely existential by the end, right? In any case, I hope it was at least entertaining read for some of you. And if it ends up getting read in the podcast, that's pretty neat. And if any of you ever find yourself endlessly screaming in a monochrome void shortly after your parent death, just remember.

Just wake up. Here's what I think. I think if you look at battleship and you look at like what that game is, right? It's it's literally not a game that you play against someone else, really. Like it's a game where the decisions are made at the beginning of the game. And then you just sit next to each other and figure them out and you have no control over it, like the decisions have already been made, like where the ships are. It's already happened. You you can look you look for them, but you don't really.

You're not like going back and forth with people. And I'm I'm going to assume that you're not a Gen Zer. I'm going to assume that you're a little older than a Gen Zer. Maybe I'm just being like maybe I'm just like I'm just saying I'm getting the vibe that I'm getting is there is someone who's not who feels like maybe they're not supposed to be living at home, just based on what they say. They say still living with my family. And if you're young, sure, you know, maybe you're maybe you're just living

with your family and that's how it's expected to be, right? So that's what I'm going to guess. But if the person was a young genius who's winning at battleship and then you look and it's old and it's a symbol of learning, maybe we're looking to maybe we're hoping that the next generation is better at politics than us. And if this happened during covid during the pandemic, like, you know, maybe, you know, a game like battleship is like a game

that represents what it feels like to be in a pandemic when you can't actually have any control over the decisions that have already been made a long time ago and you just hope your fucking ship doesn't get blown up. And then you go outside and there's bombs falling and it and there's so much violence in the world. You're not even afraid of the bombs. You're just getting hit by the bombs. I mean, like, yeah, I guess we should get out of here,

which, you know, is war is the apocalypse. It's all the stuff that's rushing towards us with a lot of like energy at this point. Right. And, you know, like you get so desensitized by it that you just kind of check out from the world and you go into your like little hotel room of disassociation, you know what I mean? And that's kind of where we all physically were for like a year. You know what I mean? Yeah, very true. That's the dream did take place in 2020.

So I mean, that also kind of fits the theme. Yeah, I still don't like go places like I did before. You know what I mean? I still am like a weird hermit in my house all the time. So, you know, I get it. I, you know, I don't know if that's true. I don't need I'm not even sure I believe that that's what this dream means. But, you know, as somebody who took English classes for a long time, that's what I think.

I like both your interpretations. They're both they both kind of fit what he seems. The person seems to be going through media undertones a little bit about, you know, what the media does to a situation, camera angles, what not? No matter what, nothing we say is correct because the brain is like, I that battleship was 80 things that happened to you today. You know, dreams aren't like omens. They're like your brain shuffling itself, I guess.

Yeah, there's there's so much that goes into one aspect of a dream that you can try to interpret what it is. But at the end of the day, that can mean anything because your brain is trying to process a million things. And that's just what it came up with to signify that one insane thing that you're dealing with. And that's, you know, that's what dreams are. Smoking if you got them. Hell yes. Oh, y'all.

All right, I'm going to we're going to reverse clockwise. I'm going to give the Alex this one because I want Jesse to read the one after this. OK, so this one is all you. It's another. This one's the next dream, Jesse. This one's the next. OK, here we go. This is a dream. Yeah, this is this next one's a dream. But I want you to read the one after that's not a dream. OK, so this one's Nightmarish Pop Culture by Winter Squashman.

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Call one eight of eight nine two five Jeep for details requires dealer contribution, a lease through Ally Financial currently must end by six three twenty four extra charge for miles over twenty thousand. Residency restrictions apply. Take delivery by five thirty one twenty three Jeep is a registered trademark. Just woke up. It's three a.m. Scared to death in my dream. My wife and I were getting hyped up for spooky month. She had heard about a horror movie coming to some streaming platform or

other and we decided we should watch it right away rather than wait for October. I popped some popcorn. She made some hot chocolate and we were good to go from here. The dream slowly changed perspective for me to the protagonist of the film. Imagine a slow zoom into the television screen and then soon I'm no longer watching a film. I'm participating in it. The protagonist is at a party on some sort of boardwalk talking to some of her friends about plans to go out shopping the next day.

She and three of her friends decide to leave the party and get some late night Chinese food things start to feel sinister. The lighting is oppressive and the shades all the party goers and shades all the party goers so that they're difficult to make out. This is like very cinematic. The atmosphere shifts shifts as the group heads outside the building and across the street to the restaurant. It's not as enclosed and the street lights have a comforting glow.

Once inside the restaurant, the group sits down and starts to talk about Walt Disney's frozen head. An elderly Korean woman is their server. The protagonist gets up from the table to go to the bathroom and things begin to change to more sinister lighting again. In the bathroom stall, the perspective changes from third person to first person. They hardcore Henry. So wait, are you the protagonist? Now, I guess now they are like when you're saying the protagonist gets up

from the table, is that you? You're just waiting to write it. Yeah, the way they write it seems like like it's almost like, yeah, they're in control of the protagonist in a weird way. Or they're just like along for the ride inside the protagonist's vision at this point. Anyway, the fluorescent light above the stall flickers and begins to strobe the red tiled bathroom. The protagonist exits the stall and sees the server at the sink, looking in the mirror.

The server's head begins to completely silently change and morph. At first, it changes to be more animalistic, gotish, monkey-ish. Then horns form and wrap around from her temple and pierce her neck. The horns morph away in her head, keeps on changing to more cartoondish forms. The fallout boy, I think they mean like vault boy, feels like an onie mask. But the wounds from the horns persist and slowly leak blood down the woman's blouse. The protagonist flees the bathroom and runs to her friends. Everything seems fine as she frantically tries to explain what she's seen.

But out the window, a few people are running around outside the big plate window. Her friends are concerned, but mostly think she's had too much to drink. One of her friends starts to cough, then his face begins to change. First, he looks like an old fisherman. Then Denzel Washington, then Treebeard. He gets to a wound. He get he too gets a wound from a branch of the tree of Treebeard's face. So it is growing into his face, I guess.

Everyone gets up and starts running around, including the face morphing friend. The protagonist runs out onto the street where she sees a few random people wandering around with morphing faces. One person is collapsed on the ground with their changing face in their arms, while someone tries to comfort them by holding their shoulders. The victim's face changes to spiked protrusions, which stab their comforter and themselves. Another person is hiding behind a car when the protagonist runs up asking what's going on. They start to respond, but then begin to choke as their head changes into a giraffe and they run off.

The car radio is playing and there's an emergency broadcast warning people to stay indoors. The protagonist runs to a nearby park and up a hill. They can see an overrun society with people running around with all sorts of weird head morphs. There's a bus on its side with the driver's head protruding from the roof in the shape of a blue whale. People in small groups are moving to the park when the group will suddenly split up as one of them starts to change. At this point, I subconsciously seem to have integrated fully into the movie, but I hear the melody of my morning alarm and come to my senses,

not in real life, but on the couch with my wife watching this movie. I start to tell her about being sucked into the movie to such an extent. I felt like I was the protagonist myself. However, as I relate this, I remember the alarm going off, which causes me to wake up for real thinking I'll be late for work, but it doesn't end there. My alarm hasn't gone off. It isn't scheduled to go off for about an hour and a half. So I roll over and go back to sleep thinking about my dream and how freaky it was

and resume the dream later on in the movie, fully integrated again. Have you had that happen before? Never. I know that you never had that happen. Never wake up, roll over and you go back into the dream. I've wanted to go back into the dream. One time, I had a great dream, and I'm going to say great. It was nasty. I want it back in that dream. I close my eyes. I was like, go back to sleep, you idiot.

Did it happen? Nothing. I woke up and was like, son of a. Were you the ghost that was having sex with Ann and Cole Smith? Were you guys losing dreaming together? Maybe. Maybe that was me. Oh, maybe. Maybe. I like that you gave me a maybe. Yeah, the protagonist is in the park in a makeshift shelter.

She peers out from a slit in a board to check her surroundings. There doesn't appear to be anybody around. So she creeps out. She heads down the empty streets to an ace hardware store a few blocks away. The store seems mostly normal, but they are stuck there. Yeah, there you go. This is the place. Hope for horrible.

But they are stuck with supplies instead of seasonal items. She browses around a bit before grabbing a double bit axe, a gallon of milk and a baguette. I still make it a baguette in the face morpher world. While she's shopping, there are other customers wandering the aisle, mostly listless, but everyone avoids any sort of contact. There's an announcement over the public address system that everyone must maintain their distance and not make bodily contact or eye contact with anyone, employee or customer.

Once the protagonist has gotten in line, she takes her shopping to the counter and steps well back, looking at a designated spot on what used to be the impulse by section plugged in. There is a television set to a news channel showing footage of some of the transformed people, but with black bars over their eyes. The news anchor was talking about new evidence that eye contact may not be a factor at all, but recommends the public avoid any and all forms of contact and continue to avoid looking into anyone's eyes or any depictions of eyes.

A bell rings behind the protagonist and she collects her shopping. As she heads toward the door, a person she hadn't noticed begins. I lost my place. I lost my place. Oh, shoot. As she heads toward the door, a person she hadn't noticed begins coming into the store from outside. They both look up and there is a brief moment of eye contact. The perfect person screams, but it cuts off in a gargle as their face

changes to the sweetest chef and then to a King Kong mask. The protagonist flees from the store, plying at her own face. In the reflection of the store window, nothing appears to have changed, but behind the glass customers and employees are frantically running anywhere else while the affected person stumbles around the store, still morphing faces. The protagonist turns away from the store and walks off. She walks by an employee, a large black guy wearing a welding mask and headed into the store ostensibly to remove the affected person.

And then my cat jumped on my chest and I woke up. So, yeah, Jesse, what the fuck does all that mean? I guess if this dream reoccurs, I'll add a third update. Thanks for reading. All right. When it was winter squashman, winter squashman. Yeah, that's winter squashman. I'm about to blow your mind. I actually know what like this was an easy one.

I'm so amped for this. All right. Oh, shit. So first off, a dream I've actually had dreams where you like watch yourself and then you're in it. You know what I mean? I think a lot of us have had that straight up the idea of watching a movie. It's like and then being in it is the idea of like this is a self reflection dream. This is you are sitting there on the outside watching yourself, but you're also in it because this is you like, all right, it's time to look at me. Time to like give myself a critical eye and it's it's a symbol of what you are

experiencing in your life, right, is what you're watching. The bathroom stall bit. Anytime there's a bathroom stall in a public place that is you're begging for privacy. Right. That is that is that. Here's the thing. This is the twist is going to be great. This is to everyone listening. This is to you, too. How often in dreams do you see the face of the person that's talking with you or associating with you?

If it's not somebody that I know specifically, it's like, yeah, I can't remember who I was with. There's people that I'm like, I was with somebody who was like my friend, but I have no idea who the fuck it was. Right, right, right. You know you're with the person, but facial details and dreams are for the most part non-existent. You might know that it's Kells, for example, and be like, Oh, yeah, this is I know this person, so you attach your face to it.

But in most most dreams, there are no faces. It's like a blur. And the fact that you are clearly seeing faces and this is a story about you, I posit that either A, these are the faces people are putting on for you or B, these are the faces you're putting on for other people. And the reason why they're faces of pop culture things or animals or whatever is because those easily interpret into, you know, this represents this

and this represents this part of your life and this part of your life. And all these different things you're doing are because you are either trying to pretend to be something that you're not or people around you might be giving you falsehoods in order to save your feelings. Or maybe you're in a bad spot where someone's like straight up lying to you and you're working through it. Like, who knows? But the idea that it is you are in it because you're in the movie,

but you're watching it so you recognizing that there's an issue. And the issue is that there are these people in your life or yourself that is this like, look, some days I got to pretend to be happy just to get through the day like that kind of thing. It's like it's actually first complicated as it is. This is like an incredibly simple dream because people have this all the time. Like dreams like this where it's just crazy, but really break it down. It's actually pretty simple.

And that's like, even I've had dreams like this. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I love it for a more like holistic interpretation that's like less about psychology and more about like if this was a book. How about this? OK. There's obviously there's obviously some some covid overtones here. Right. Like I'm serious. Like like there's like a thing like don't make eye contact with people.

Stay apart from people. If you look at people in the eye, you start changing your face. You know what I mean? Like stuff like that. And I think, you know, I've sometimes people feel oppressed like the same thing that makes a lot of people into sort of like anti mask type people is a feeling that we've all felt during the last year and a half, which is that like, you know, it's hard to ignore the parallels with things like 1984 and stuff like that, that it that it felt like when,

especially when the government was seriously being like, do not go outside. You dumb motherfuckers, like stay the fuck inside. We can deal with this in like weeks if you just don't talk to each other. Right. And it feels, you know, like the man is trying to stop us from having like love together, man. Like interacting, you know what I mean? Like real shit, you know what I mean? Like that type of Alex. Yeah. Oh, shit.

Yeah. So I'm getting there. I'm getting there. So check this out. So look, so the face is changing, right? There's two diseases going around in America right now. Weirdly, they both seem to be affecting the same people mostly. But I don't think that's even actually true because because the thing that is crazy about now is that we have the ability to there's a lot of freedom that people have now in society, especially in America that they didn't have before, which is a free the freedom to be

who you actually are, right? This is a new thing for a lot of people, like a lot of a lot of different demographics out there of people that have been having to hide who they are or pretend like there's some other way or, you know, weren't able to, you know, because of social conditioning, address feelings about who they really are in their lives, right? But that's not the same thing as being able to be whatever you want to be and for the world to be whatever it like you want it to be.

But I think, you know, these people with their faces changing, you know, if you're if you're like me, who have spent, you know, years of school reading like five books a week and writing interpretive essays about them, like you're talking about a disease of of identity and there's maybe a perception in your life that there are people out there whose disease is one of losing their identity or becoming an identity that is incongruous with who they are, you know, for some other reason, like a lot of people will change their politics

just to support their argument at the time. You know what I mean? Stuff like that amorphous opinions and strange situations and a society that's becoming further and further oppressed by this sort of like inability to be to to be to be fine with who we actually are, you know, now that all these people are able to be who they are. There's a lot of other people who are like, I know exactly who I am, but now I want to live in a world where like, here's what the story is.

You know what I mean? Here's here's what the real reality is. And it doesn't matter the facts for these people anymore. And it's not just about politics. You know, I think also like stuff like gaming, like the amount that people play video games or spend spend time on the Internet, which I think is just kind of another type of gaming without a lot of good story writing. Yeah, yeah.

Is like, you know, something that people feel like they're just allowed to do instead of participating in real life. And I think like, you know, I think that there's a lot of anxiety that comes with sort of like perceiving that. And I think that the pandemic and the way that it was to like go to the store and how you were like, so like, if you know, that feeling of like, if somebody like takes their mask off and talks to me, I'm going to like punch him in the face. Like, you know, if they're like, if they like try and like tell me

I'm a bitch for wearing my mask or something, I will fuck. Oh, yeah, I'm always ready to fight going into a store with my mask on. I'm like, go ahead and tell me, say something. It's a weird, it's a weird feeling that did not exist two years ago. You know what I mean? Every movie that you've ever seen does not have this feeling in it. You know what I mean? Like, this is a new thing that wasn't real until recently.

And I think, you know, maybe there's something, you know, I empathize. With this with that feeling, I don't know if it's real, but I empathize. I was going to on the flip side, one of the things that you hear people often say when they talk about mask wearing, which I felt like maybe this is part of that dream. If we're going to go with the Alex Holistic approach here, a lot of people when they complain about children, for example, in school wearing mask, they say, well, they can't see each other's faces.

How will they know if they're, you know, smiling or sad or they can't see their faces? And right, if you have a whole dream about faces, it's possible that it could be like, I can't see your face. What's underneath there? Yeah, it's an elephant. All right, like who? Yeah, exactly. It could be a blue whale.

It could be a giraffe. Denzel, you never know. Yep. It's probably a relief for celebrities. I didn't really think about that until just now masking up for like hiding IDs. Yeah, that I think that's probably a nice little benefit. Yeah, no one recognizes me anywhere I go now.

It's crazy. Now Daniel Radcliffe can finally wear different clothes. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I want to reverse card this dream and say, what if it's just memories of a dream? What if it's not a dream? What if it's real? No. What if it's alien? Look, right, it was alien abduction and you're just remembering all the experiments you've seen every time you've been scooped up.

And it's your brain trying to remind you of the bio bioengineering experiments humanity crossed with blue whales and giraffes. It doesn't end there, man. It just goes even deeper. Mathis, one time this is like, here's the thing. You would say this dream is an alien abduction. One time when I was in college and I still remember this dream, there was this girl that I used to just like

have the biggest crush on and side story years later was like, why did you never ask me out in college? And I was like, yeah, so mad. Anyway, needless to say, she's married now. I hate it. Anyway, so what like I had this Christmas girl and I had a dream that I was at a mall and I saw her and like ramp to go say hi. And when I turned around, she had no face. She like kept turning and then I got kidnapped,

like something grabbed me and pulled me into a room. And it was a bunch of Britney Spears body alien head having dudes. And they started like probing me and I was like, stop, no. And it literally was like Britney Spears music. While the aliens were like a man body. Yeah, Britney Spears body. This was like prime Britney Spears time. So Britney Spears, but like alien literal gray head.

It's like maybe you got scooped up and got milked for your seat. I mean, here's the thing. I'm fine with it. I'm fine with there being little Jesse aliens out there. Just, you know, yeah, give me like I'm fine with it. I'm fine with there being Jesse aliens. Yeah, I'm fine with it. Safety when the aliens are confronting that reality. Imagine confronting that reality.

Yeah, I'm fine with it. Imagine a little green guy that has like your like distinct facial hair and you're like, that's me. How many fuck me up with the fucking blaster and is like, it's time for the invasion. Father, you're no longer needed. That's where it's like, hey, that's like, listen to that. That's probably how the fucking baby would sound.

I mean, he'd be like, he'd make little noises like that's my kid. All right, the silver outfit with the hoop shoulders. I'm fine with it. If there was like any little Jesse aliens, I'd be fine. 80. Wow, they milked you a lot. Oh, yeah. I mean, obviously they milked you. All right, they did.

So I was trying to go back to sleep. I'm going to get as much of this as I can. The scenes fly by and Jesse's climbing on their ship. And they're just like, no, you're done. We're done using you. Some more. He's like that greased up guy from Family Guy, but just for those aliens.

Glorical security is back. God damn it. Can't get my boys. I got more of me. Oops, I fell down. Please catch me. Dude, what it's what you're actually doing is you're pulling the emperor's plan

and rise a Skywalker. You're building your own secret empire. That's exactly what I've been trying to do. Do you know all those guys look like Palpatine in that whole room? Yeah, they all look like Palpatine. You think they're just like alien, like 80 Jesse's. It's just like a bunch of Jesse's.

Like green on green skin. So they're just like me. Sure, why not? OK, all right, last story, Jesse. OK, this one is for you. Finding your perfect home was hard, but thanks to Burrow, furnishing it has never been easier. Burrow's easy to assemble modular sofas and sectionals

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Toyota, let's go places. A mild case of cyclothymia. Thymia? Cyclothymia? Cyclothymia? Yeah, I don't know. It's in the wild, 64. Hi, Jaluminati hosts and fellow Jaluminats. I've been enjoying the podcast for a number of years, and it's one I often reference.

Can we just say I can't believe it's been a number of years. I know, I was just thinking that. I don't want to say anything. Yeah, it's been. Oh, God. I'd like you guys to share my story on the podcast. If you feel it may be at all helpful, helpful. This will be interesting. I'll start by saying that the following isn't meant to discredit

any people or stories that may that many have shared in the past. I only mean for this to open up the discussion of a possible explanation that I don't believe has been touched on the podcast. Wait, what? What I know, I just want to save this story for you, Jesse. He's going to appreciate it. OK, last year, my grandmother was admitted to the hospital for covid fingers crossed during that during what would be two tumultuous weeks of uncertainty. I experienced high levels of anxiety.

What was not typical response and the reason I share my story is what follows. I hope your grandma's OK. Fingers crossed. Yeah, God, please. Yeah, me too. One night when I was listening to music on my couch, as I do during times of depression and stress, a flash of light appeared in my peripheral vision. I turned expecting to see my computer waking or Alexa telling me someone

was passing by my door. However, there was nothing. There was no apparent source. I would have thought nothing of this if only it didn't happen multiple times in those two weeks and not just in the living room that night. It occurred in bed before falling asleep in the shower with lights on, even outside on a walk. It wasn't always my peripheral, sometimes bring directly in front. The best way I can describe it is like lens flare,

but JJ Abrams isn't there to shove it in your eye holes. Yeah, no, OK. I would also have blimps of shadow appear as well, but I don't have any spooky stories with that. These are basically dark spots in my vision, as if something or someone was in my peripheral, but nothing would be there. Seeing things wasn't my only problem. I also heard things.

I have wood flooring home is about 10 years old now, so it's not old wood. I was about to say, so it's not old. Yeah. Oh, so sound echoes very easily and loudly, which at night can feed into one's paranoia. Several nights had not only hearing creaking, but also voices. Are all these people at your apartment, Alex? Is that what you're talking about in voices? They hearing voices. Everyone. Yeah, they're all there.

Listen, no, nobody's here. I don't know. Look, I'll try and record it if it ever happens. Like if I'm like presence of mind to record it, I will try my fucking best. And it happens to be me like happening to one of us. And you bought me the haunted doll and it didn't happen to me. Or maybe it did. And that's why you're in Texas now. Like maybe you don't even know. Maybe you got like, oh, yeah.

You teleported. You don't you. You're not even in the same fucking place. Where are you even at in reality? That that exercised you. Damn, didn't it? I'm blown. One such night in bed. I would have sworn I heard the door close accompanied

with aforementioned voices. This had me so terrified that my partner, our two kids and myself were in danger. I quickly told Alexa, wake the house. I love that Alexa is a character in this story. Yeah. Which turned on the lights in our living room as well as the TV. Took a few moments of silence before I braved getting out of bed to investigate with Sting in hand.

Yes, that's Sting, a big token fan. Amazing. I listen. You know what? I'm with you. I like if it was glowing, I would be like, fuck. Oh, I would. Oh, oh, sorry. You're talking about the sword, not the artist with Sting. With a songwriter, Sting in hand.

Like a G.I. Joe of Sting. Like a CD. I got like fields of gold, you know, playing on big token fan. And when the Lord of the Rings films were in theaters, my dad got me the Weta Reptica. Awesome. I got up to find what I. So it is like the metal one. I thought it was going to be like, yeah, metal Sting.

You can buy some up with this Sting. Like, yeah, like this is yeah. This is as real as this might as well be the real Sting. I got to find no one obviously inside the house, but that didn't mean no one was there. So I frantically opened every closet, verified all the windows were locked, checked the pantry, looked beyond the furniture, checked the deck, looked beyond the shower curtains and checked underneath the beds.

That is thorough finding everything in order. I crawled back into bed. Question, what did your partner and two kids think of this? Because I would have been like, why are you checking there? I realized shortly after that had anyone broken in, my cats would responded by skidding somewhere to hide. My frenzied search around the entirety of the house was also not a typical response for noises like the light in the shadows.

I would continue to hear various sounds, often muddle talking, yet not as severe as that evening. As I never experienced anything like this and felt and really felt like I was going crazy, I scheduled an appointment with a psychiatrist. Everything suddenly stopped after two weeks when my grandmother succumbed to COVID. Oh, I'm so sorry. And passed away. Although my symptoms had stopped, I recognized the importance of my appointment

and kept it on my schedule. It was during the meeting with psychiatrists that we learned that I have cyclothymia, a low grade form of bipolar disorder. These instances were psychotic episodes where mine briefly breaks from reality. Whoa, whoa, that's wild. Instances were fairly minor, so I could recognize them as not real. Others are not so fortunate. I also discovered that other random oddities in my behavior,

such as completely rearranging the garage or consolidating storage for more room on my random Sunday morning, a hypomanic episode, as well as my previously diagnosed depression, are symptoms of bipolar disorder. After the diagnosis, I was prescribed meds, which have since helped a lot. I still have episodes like a more recent one in which I saw what could only be described visually as a floating orb of smoke that swirled around on the side of my bed. My brain immediately jumped to ghost, but as a skeptic and being aware of my condition, I know that was not the case.

Thankfully, my meds help regulate my moods and anxiety, which in turn prevents these episodes from occurring more frequently. This again is to say this explains various sightings and experiences. There are often so many variables at play and my story does not replace others. I want to share one possible cause of experiences. I've been hesitant to share this in the past as a very personal journey. Still, I feel it's important to share mental illness often goes on diagnosed. And if this helps someone start the process of seeking out treatment,

and I think it's worth sharing, that is very true. And thank you for sharing. That is really cool. I agree. And super super condolences about your grandma. That is just the 100 percent. I'm sorry. I wonder this is this goes out, I think, to everyone. I wonder going back to things Alex has been saying all episode and COVID. This is a stressful time. And I am curious what that effect has on everyone from kids to adults,

to grandparents, to whoever. And if it does exacerbate any condition you may have. And so the fact that you had the foresight to go seek help. And then they were like, oh, yeah, no, this is a thing. I wonder if that is, you know, if things can be triggered in other people that maybe before they had nothing and now they have something, right? Like you said you were fine. And then like you had a two week period where you started seeing things.

Yeah, I don't know. Worth what if the big like follow up to COVID is like the birth of like a new magic and like we have to deal with like real forces of evil and demons. That's what you think is going to happen. Shadow Run is going to happen. I didn't say I think it's going to happen. I did not say we're headed for Shadow Run. What if all this leads to basically you're saying,

what if all this leads to something better? Let me tell you how reality works. Not better, not better. Dark magic coming into the world does not sound better to me. I'm not going to let you I'm going to let you down then. You're not going to have dark magic. You don't have any magic. It's going to just be this and then another stupid thing we all have to deal with.

Another pandemic. Yeah, another nonsense thing that we're just going to like handle. To like we're going to go to war with another country over fucking water. Because that's what life is. It's just one more bullshit thing to handle after the next. And you hope you hope you can find someone to hold your hand through the whole thing. That's life. Welcome. Yeah. And the best we can do in in in absence of that is heading to patreon.com.

So where you can support this show for many, many years to come until the earth goes to the water wars. And we love you very much. Yes, we do. Thank you guys so much for listening. We're off to record a story for that very patreon. Yeah, thank you for your stories. Drop them on the reddit is the best place to do it.

We we get them there. If you're part of the patreon discord is even a place from the discord where you can drop your personal stories that do peruse through there. If you're so often as well. Many so it is literally going to be here right now right here at patreon.com. Right after this right now. You can just keep listening to it. You can imagine we were still just sitting here.

It's a great time. It's a great time. We'll see you there. I mean, we still are. We're not going anywhere. We're just going to sit right here and record the next thing. It's like whatever. It's fine. Anyway, me and my wife were sitting outside indulging on our porch one night.

Enjoying ourselves. I needed to go to the bathroom, so I stepped back inside. And after a few moments, I hear my wife go, holy shit, get out here. So I quickly dash back outside. She's looking up at the sky in the fall. I look up to and there's a perfect line of dozen lights traveling across the sky. Yeah. Summer is back and so are the deals at Larry H.

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