Chilluminati Podcast - Episode 152 - The Kentucky Cannibal Part 1 - Not My Littlebury!

Episode Date: May 13, 2022

True Crime is back with an often forgotten Old West killer! And he's also heckin' handsome and a great showman apparently.  LIVE SHOW TICKETS:  http://www.chilluminatipod.com WE HAVE A PLUSHIE OF MOTHMAN COMING. GO TO THEYETEE LINK IN THE DECRIPTION Patreon - http://www.patreon.com/chilluminatipod BUY OUR MERCH - http://www.theyetee.com/collections/chilluminati Minisodes From Episodes: 115 116 117 Special thanks to our sponsors this episode Talkspace - http://www.talkspace.com Promo Code chill Canva - http://www.canva.me/chill Honey - http://www.joinhoney.com/chill Jesse Cox - http://www.youtube.com/jessecox Alex Faciane - http://www.youtube.com/user/superbeardbros Art Commissioned by - http://www.mollyheadycarroll.com Theme - Matt Proft End song - POWER FAILURE - https://soundcloud.com/powerfailure Video - http://www.twitter.com/digitalmuppet

Hello, everybody, and welcome back to the Chiluminati Podcast, episode 152. As always, I am one of your hosts, Mike Martin, and I'm not going to lie, boys. I didn't. You know what? The Wanda and Vision of LA, Jesse and Alex. There we go. Perfect. Perfect.

There we go. But is, are we really the same people that we were at the beginning of this intro? As our cells constantly replace each other's cells. Are you familiar with the sheep of Theseus? You're the most intelligent machine in the world, one of the most basic fucking metaphors. Broke his brain. He got him, though. He got him, though.

He did. He broke his brain. He broke white vision's brain. Do you remember for like a long time, people were like, he said something like, I got to work with an actor that I've always wanted to work with. Yes. Yes. Yes.

And then. Greatest troll ever. And then everybody was like, it's Patrick Stewart. This is happening, folks. And it was just himself. It was literally nothing. Yeah. Something to think about on the Chilibonati podcast, especially in this day and age of

Marvel. Yeah. And then another thing that's really popular in this day and age is crowdfunding because it takes it takes control of our beautiful art and journalism away from the hands of the evil corporate overlords and places them in the hands of the heroic creators like the Avengers. We're like the Avengers of of paranormal. We're like the Avengers of paranormal poorly researched episodes.

Hey, hey, hold on. Poorly researched. I contend with that. Good sir. I tried. I do my best. Let me. You do too.

You do great research. Let me tell you. I'm talking about myself. I'm talking about myself. You do great research. Don't put yourself down. I do. I treat sources that are not good sources as great sources.

My research is not fair. This is this is the Chilibonati podcast. Okay. This isn't the Chilibonati academic journal. All right. You know, here's the thing. People need to be aware that in the background of Alex's shot. This is how you know you can't say anything Alex has really little green alien.

I don't know what that is, but he's my bet is it's an ashtray. It looks like an ashtray. Yes. A green alien smoking a joint. It's a green out here. Oh my God. It's so funny. Yeah.

That's like, you know, you can't trust a word that Alex says because the background is like, we out here. We out here. That's what the aliens said. Not me. Yeah. Yeah. That was a gift.

Okay. I'm not going to tell you from who. Oh, man. You'll never know. Yeah. Patreon.com slash Chilibonati. Write an episode about where I got that ashtray from. Just kidding.

Also, let's let's pimp the live show because we have over 70% or something like that. Tickets sold. We're running low on tickets. Y'all. So please, if you're coming to the show in a couple of weeks at this point, get your tickets right now at ChilibonatiPod.com, 25 bucks a ticket. Our twirl. Right now.

All right. I also want to, I also want to point out that I did not actually advertise Patreon.com slash ChilibonatiPod. Oh my bad. I almost did, but then I got distracted by how cool my ashtray was. So please send us money so that we can keep making the show at Patreon.com slash ChilibonatiPod. And we will reward you handsomely with not just bespoke art, but bespoke feelings, bespoke heart, not just bespoke art, bespoke heart at the finest website.

Also, you get chill tracks and we got a hell of a movie coming this month. Good Lord. Every month, it's like, we don't know what we're going to do. And then we like, just like we have like a conversation and then it's an even worse choice than the previous month. Every time. I don't know that Nicholas Cage movie. Wow.

What a gorgeous time. That thing was. You're welcome. You're welcome. Here's the thing. It is exactly what you out there are thinking that it went exactly as well as you think it might have went out there. Listener available now at Patreon.com slash ChilibonatiPod.

I don't know what you're talking about. Pay the ghost. Pay. The ghost. The ghost. Pay the ghost. Let's be real. You need our track to enjoy that movie.

Did you pay the ghost? Stop. Stupid. That's the plot. Jesse spoiled the whole movie just now. You literally said the whole plot of the movie just now. That was it. That was all like me and going, what do you mean?

Pay the ghost. Great. Awesome. That's it. Chad, did you pay the ghost? Did anyone ever pay the ghost? I don't know. I don't think so.

Why do you know what she's doing with the payments? And also like, oh, we can't spoil the movie. The end is insane. The end is like. So many questions. So many questions. It really felt more like she was taking whatever she fucking wanted because she was a goat. But it doesn't matter.

It doesn't matter. I think we need a sequel. Pay the ghost to. Hey, the podcasters is what you should do. Shulman, any pod head down there, pay the ghost. And the last shill, hey, we have a t-shirt's gone now. If you missed out on our new t-shirt, too bad, so sad, but we still are opening up emails for getting notifications when the plushie goes live.

And when that goes live, you want to jump on that as soon as you can because I have a real gut feeling that thing's going to sell out super fast. So head over to the yeti.com. It's a cute, you know, by like 20. I've already had a couple of people who listen to the show, who I know personally like try to get the good in on the on the on the little moth man. Yeah, me too. We're getting them before you fools.

That's for sure. We better get them before everybody else. That'll be a prize possession to have on my shelf. That plushie is great. So go check that out. I think that's it for the shilling. So gentlemen, are you ready for a new Mathis episode? A new Mathis episode.

You know what it's going to be? Is this the year 2022? The year of true crime for me. So we are beginning part one of a two parter all about the Kentucky cannibal. Yeah, it's going to be a fun one. Can I ask you a question real quick, though? Just like a yes at the top. Is the Kentucky cannibal a chicken?

Unfortunately, no, because that would be that'd be well. I mean, like, yeah, if you're about to say that this chicken, did he eat other chickens? Amazing. That'd be amazing. Kind of fucked up. If you think about it, yeah, amazing. If John Wayne Gasey had eaten another question, he might be the Kentucky cannibal.

Yeah, another question. Did this cannibal deep fry his victims? No, he also did not do that either. OK, I got one last question. I'm ready for it. When you say this is a new Mathis episode, are you saying it's just a new Mathis episode? Are you saying it's like a new Mathis episode, like new metal,

where it's like an NU with an omelette over it? And it's like a good question, good kind of like hip hop, sort of gritty, acoustic clown imagery version, because there's a little bit of, like a subverting of expectations when it comes to killers like this. We'll go with NU metal. It's a little bit different than the usual. This is a new Mathis. This is a new Mathis one.

Mathis was a little with a little too early 2000s stank on it. A little early 2000s thing. Would you say it was not really rolling? Would you? Yeah, I would. I would say that he loves his chocolate starfish and his hot dog flavored water. I don't know about that first one or that second one. That's one thing and it's a real Lip Biscuit album.

Yeah, a little stank on today's episode, I guess. Because yeah, today, gentlemen, we are returning to the world of true crime in the year all about it for this podcast. Anyway, the story of none other than Boon Helm is a story that is a magnificent snapshot of a wild and violent time in America. The violence and do-it-yourself attitude of the 1800s Wild West mixed with the wildly accepted mean with the wildly accepted meaning of being a man at that time,

which helped to craft the monster that Boon Helm would become. Being a man in the 1800s really meant hiding, you know, working, not acknowledging any sort of emotion whatsoever. And if you could provide for your family, you needed to get murdered because you're not worth shit. A lot of people saw and respected others who clearly were able to provide for their families and so on. And if you couldn't do that, were you really a man?

And while the Wild West was certainly violent with with a much regarded sentiment of might makes right, even Boon Helm raised eyebrows and brought unwanted attention with his actions through his life. But don't get it confused. While Boon Helm was certainly an aggressive and violent man, there's a reason he's nothing more than really a footnote in history, unlike, say, Billy the Kid,

one of the most famous Wild West figures to exist despite his death at such an early age. Boon only lasted as long as he did because he had one rule that he lived by. Nothing was off limits so long as it ensured his survival into the next day. But before we get into Boon Helm and the awful deeds that earned him the nickname Kentucky Cannibal,

you get one guess at what those deeds may have been. Eating eating chicken. Yeah, was it chicken? So close. Yeah, so close, so close, boys. You'll have to find out. We'll be surprised when it happens. We have to acknowledge the main source for today's episode, the book titled The Kentucky Cannibal by author Ryan Green.

It's a really, really good book with as much of the information as you can really scrounge out about this person. And he does a good job at kind of adding layers of like fictional, we'll say description, putting feelings into people. There's no way he knew if they felt one way or another. It's making it a very easy read. But if you realize that's what you're reading, you can pull a lot out of this book.

So Boon Helm was born as the eighth of what would be 11 children to his parents, Joseph Helm and Nancy Helm. But since both of his parents were born in the 17 hundreds, 1787 for Joseph and 1792 for Nancy, knowledge of their life growing up is essentially non-existent. We know nothing about these parents beyond what we know about them in the context of Boon Helm. So our story begins very simply on the night of January 28th, 1828,

in a small cabin out in Lincoln County, Kentucky, where Boon Helm would be born in a way that foreshadowed his own existence. Nancy had had seven children up to this point. And much like the ones before, she'd figured herself prepared for yet another night of exhausting and painful childbirth. However, things took a quick turn as Joseph heard his wife screaming and wailing in the bedroom while she spent time while he spent time with his seven children, doing his best to keep them entertained

and distracted from what might be the very last night on earth. His wife would have. I can't help but think that you're going to say that he ate his way out of her body right now. Dude, I'm not going to lie, shadowing. I thought the same. I thought the same thing. Was it because I said foreshadowing? Yeah, well, yeah, it nearly meant violent and painful life.

Well, yeah, but like you. I mean, she's screaming in the other room and the dads with the kids. And I was like, that baby walks out of the room by himself. And the father, you know, I've been watching too many fucked up movies. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, exactly. Through all the children that they had together, none quite caused this much anguish, distress and pain in Nancy during childbirth. It took everything for Joseph not to leave his kids alone

and rush in to care for her, but unlike so many parents that end up with killers for children on all accounts, Joseph and Nancy seemed to both be good parents and he himself wouldn't abandon his children to keep them entertained and happy, even if it meant losing his wife in the process. As good as they were as good as parents as anyone in the 1800s could be anyway. And by the end of the long night, a healthy baby was born, the eighth to the family, and he would take the name Boone Helm.

And Nancy would survive. Their father was a hard worker, one who can who the community always looked fondly after. He worked hard to provide for his now very large family and would drop everything to help a neighbor in need, even if he was clearly exhausted or even maybe hurt. But no matter how hard he worked, the money made was only ever just barely enough.

Claims and whispers of free land out West during the rush had brought the Helm family out there initially, but too long after the initial rush had hit when they arrived, all the land had already been taken, but there was no going back. The travel was treacherous and making it back was never a guarantee. So those who would arrive late to the game were stuck working for those who sat in their large comfy homes on their large pieces of free land and work in mind for them for as little as those who own

the land could possibly pay them without killing them in the process. But then essentially you're stuck being these people's slaves only simply because they got there first and that's just how it goes out in the old West. I'm sure Jesse, like I see you nodding along. This is similar to how it's similar to how it still goes, bro. Yeah, in a lot of ways. Yeah. And but before before any sort of improvements in the life would happen, three more years would pass before another opportunity

for the family would come about. And in those three years, three more children accruing up to 11 children living under a very small roof out in little rural Kentucky. But just as things were getting desperate, word had traveled to Joseph that land was actually going up for the taking out in Missouri. And without a second thought, they all packed their belongings and followed that gold rush fever further west. Hold on. Just really quickly time out.

I know that we're talking about a Kentucky cannibal. And I was going to ask this question at the beginning of this episode, but I felt like, no, there's no way he'd do this. Is it a chicken? Is this someone called a Kentucky cannibal that is it doesn't take place in Kentucky? You may or may not be correct. You won't find out until the end of next episode. I understood. I just want to let you know. That's one of my favorite American tropes.

It's like, I'm Texas Pete from North Carolina. You're like, yeah, I spent three years in Texas before I spent 49 out here. Yeah, Texas Pete. Yes, the Kentucky cannibal from Missouri. OK, let's please make Missouri soda at this point. There was a separate states. Come on now, you should know what a fool I've been even though I said.

Missouri, yeah, yeah, exactly. But this time, luckily for Joseph and the Helm family, they were among the first to arrive. Joseph got to pick land and pick the land thinking best what would serve his family, not just now, but in the far future, many years ahead. And while they were certainly on the edge of civilization and often in more danger than they were back in Kentucky, they were also much closer to a small town that had just been formed.

And as as well as having the Santa Fe Trail run right through their backyard. So Joseph picked a place that essentially that they have a lot of land to work on. Civilization to enjoy. And Joseph thought if any of his kids preferred city life, they'd have an easy way back east because the Santa Fe Trail was right there. Seems seems plush. And it was. And it was a very good move for him. The land wasn't like rocky land that they couldn't farm.

They were able to soon get their land begin working and their land would begin to prosper with, of course, the help of all family workers back in the 1800s, all of their 11 fucking children. And Joseph and Nancy began to find true stability in their life for the very first time and much like back in Lincoln County, they were a family that had the love and respect of this small town as they got to know them. And soon that small town would grow and grow as traders and travelers

were almost guaranteed to pass through here heading west or back east. And while their family stabilized, soon the children grew no longer under the small restricted life that they had back east. They now had a farm to work and land to enjoy. Boone quickly took to the work and by the age of 10, he was 15 feet tall. I mean, while that is obviously wishful thinking, he had packed on noticeable muscle like the 10 year old was ripped and he took to the work.

And I don't like the idea of a ripped 10 year old me either, man. It's a very uncomfortable image. You're like, hey, Mr. He does a ship shirt just rips open because he waves it. He's thinking of that scene where Bruce Lee is like in the hotel room and he's like flexing his back muscles and that being a 10 year old kid. And then thinking of the one skit from that Netflix show with like the little boy boys.

There we go. The big old boys. You know why it can't be you, Kyle, right? You know why it can't be you. You know why it can't be you, Kyle. He knows it can't be him. I don't even know what you're talking about. I think you should leave is what it's called.

I know that show. I've never watched there's amazing, amazing skit about a buff boys pageant or something. And it's just like a bunch of kids in like muscle suits parading around on stage. That's something you go over right now. It's like a little boy. I think I have seen that. It's like a little boy, strongman competition that.

Well, Boon would win. That's what I'm saying. Yeah, he would win. He'd pick up those kids and hook them like he would just want. He would just throw them feet away. He'd eat them. Just he would. He might he might.

Yeah, Boon obviously quickly took to the took to the work and the work click clearly took to him. Boon soon began to run and hang out with the teenagers of the town who had much more experience living in the frontier and would quickly take Boon under their wing to teach him how to hunt, trap and skin animals. Boon really wanted to learn to live like these guys did in this small town to prove himself in many ways and get the approval of the older boys.

And he absolutely loved hanging out with them. And while the other boys could be squeamish when they ended up did catching something with their hunt or trap and it came time to skin the animal, Boon eagerly jumped at the opportunity. Not only did he thoroughly enjoy skinning his fresh catches, he would on more than one occasion begin to skin a rabbit well before killing it, only letting it die, screaming and writhing in his hands as the blood bled out of it. All of the boys would put distance between them.

Oh, all of the boys would put distance between them is like that's probably not the worst, the best way sentence. But he seemed to enjoy it. He was cold, stoic when he did it. He didn't have any issues whatsoever. Perhaps the first noticeable obvious issue with good old young Boon. It became apparent to Boon's friends that as well as the uncanny urge to skin a live animal, it wasn't enough for Boon to simply be liked

by his new teenage friends. Young Boon demanded respect, and when it wasn't given, he would take it. Even at this age, Boon was violent. And at the smallest hint of an insult, Boon would leap into a flurry of fists, fighting whoever dared to say whatever Boon thought disrespectful to him, beating and pummeling the person senselessly, oftentimes needing to be pulled off the boy by the others in fear that he might actually kill him. But even interfering with Boon as he was doling out his homebrewed

punishment was a gamble, sometimes beating the person who pulled off, sometimes going as far as to beat the person who pulled him off as their punishment. But there's two interesting things to note in this particular personality trait with Boon. One, while Boon seemed to be driven by respect and violence to earn it, when he engaged in them, he never outwardly ever showed anger or rage. The beating was almost a matter of fact, the logical outcome to the person who disrespected him. And two, those who pulled him off weren't thrown into an immediate fistfight then and there.

Boon would wait patiently sitting by day after day until he could get the jump on the person who had pulled him off of the beating alone. When nobody was around to save him, to pull him off and beat them even worse than he was beating the person who had insulted him, wildly swinging, beating and clobbering until he felt justice had been done to his name. Boon, in the end, truly didn't care about his bad reputation. Only the respect it earned him and the town was very much complicit in this. So he was just he was a violent ten year old.

He was just a very hard to say. Like he wasn't just a young kid. He was putting it to use. Yeah, he was buff. And yeah, I guess. Yeah, I guess putting it to use is a good way to put it. They love the town loved the Boon's feats of strength and agility, though. They would often circle around to watch Boon do some tricks that he would do for the town center. What? By the time I know, they would be like, Boon's doing something fun again.

They'd like pick up heavy things and throw them or do weird agility tricks to like jumping through hoops and shit like that. He liked to show off his physical prowess. Yeah, literally, yes. But think about it. You're in an 1830s at this point, essentially gold rush town that sprung up simply because land was given out. You don't have a lot going on other than mining and saloon. So when a young, athletic, talented boy comes around,

it's a free shirt. It's like a free circus show. It's like a free circus. It really is. And we'll actually talk about one of his his favorite tricks that he'd like to do in a minute, because by the time he was a teenager, not only was he doing tricks for the town, Boon was holding wrestling and boxing exhibitions where he would summarily beat down all the full grown adults who would dare try to step in the ring with him so he could just they could try and like beat down this young kid who never saying

this story to me. Yeah. I'm a 10 year old and the fact that you even use this line of dialogue. I'm letting you know it's him and the rain. It's like, I don't give a damn about my bad reputation. And he's like beating up like adults and shit. And everyone's like, yeah, that's a picture in that scene when Moon Knight fights Conchu, but it's like a 10 year old boy. I guess it's so ridiculous.

It is, though. It's like that, like minus the song. That's what it was. You add the song and it becomes like a comedy skit. But like that boy is beating up adults again. It's so it's hilarious because the town ate it up and really only reinforced the positive like positive reinforcements to his violent physical activities, essentially.

One of his favorite tricks to perform just one of his favorite is it agility tricks to perform was to get on his horse, have it canter across town. He would throw his bowie knife into the ground ahead of him. And while charging along on horseback, leap off the horse, grab the bowie knife and remount before the horse ever had a chance to slow down. That's a skill. That's a skill. This is he's like young teenager at this point, 13, 14.

This is absolutely insane. What are we doing? Did video games destroy us all? I think it's all going to do this now. This guy became a psycho killer. No, that's true. Video games keep people from going out and doing this. Interesting question, though, boys, if the three of us existed in the 1800s,

what is the 1800s version of our entertainment? I'm what do we do? I'm dead. How do we do it? What do I do in the 1800s? No, no, the what is it? Eighteen Hundred Chiluminati show. I'm just a homeless guy yelling at people in the street. Chiluminatica or whatever they would call it.

I'm at this. You are definitely the preacher with the Bible standing on the clock. The old stuff. Spoken. Alex is the old like, you know, there's always the old drunk minor who's like. I'd still be talking about Andrew W.K. Somehow, but like, yeah, it's 1870. And me, I'm like that saloon guy who's like.

You have like a perfect round like mustache and like ice cream every time Boone walked into the saloon, be like, boom, yeah, as you walk and walk by behind your piano. Yeah, you get behind your piano. Alex gets up already drunk. I'm not afraid of you. You know, he like shoots and everybody's like, yeah. They shot the crazy guy.

Oh, shit. It's funny because he did do that a few times. What? It's anyway. Yeah, the the they loved his feats of strength and it really was an entertainment thing. And the Bowie knife was his most popular agility trick. But the fun tricks of a young kid really only lasts so long

before the town grows bored and as Boone grew into adulthood, his misadventures slowed and no longer was he able to box or wrestle. And instead, since no one really entertained him anymore, since he was like 18, 19, eight people turned. What? He ate people. He turned to eating people. That's correct. That was the next course of action for him anymore.

And he was like, you know what, I'm going to eat a person. There's still some. I think you're still going to be surprised by what this man does. We've got a road to go, huh? And we do see. And yeah, yeah, he has a little club down in his KFC. No, he would, of course, no longer able to do those things. He instead did what everybody else did in those days

and he turned to booze and barfights as a way of still fulfilling that desire, that urge to show how strong he was to the town. Nearly every day, he would spend everything he made just on booze in the night before getting paid the next day and doing that same thing the next night over and over and over again. And of course, those barfights would bring in the law and the law knew Boone's face all too well. While his father and family had worked hard to earn themselves a good reputation,

Boone seemed dead set on testing the limits of that reputation. Slowly, his siblings would scatter to the world, some to cities, others further west, some perhaps further north. Before long, only Boone remained, eating at his mother's table, living at his mother's home. Soon, the law the law could even no longer overlook Boone with just warnings. And the latest, the very last saloon brawl he had earned him a proper warrant. But Boone was a man who only respected himself.

And when the sheriff came for him with the warrant, Boone not only refused to dismount his horse, he also rode it directly to the center of town and up the courthouse steps where he would dismount and burst into the courtroom, which was already currently holding a trial and in a burst of screams, threats, insults, curse words and slurs, demanded to know what judge was foolish enough to even approve such a stupid thing. And whether due to surprise or simply quote air quotes

it being just a different time, the judge waived the warrant and the fees along with it, as well as waiving the contempt of court charge. Are you fucking kidding me? No, he literally ran in screaming, interrupting a trial, and the judge waived it all. Was like, well, you tried real hard, kid. Yeah, basically, not only that, almost like a scene out of the movie. Boone went back outside, mounted his horse slowly with the grin as it stood by

the nearby courthouse door, looked at the sheriff and said, better luck next time, boys, before riding off away from them. It's like, dude, is Buford Tannen. This dude had mind powers. He had mind control powers, and he was hiding the money control. He was the first mutant. This is crazy. This is impossible. Dude, I'm not killing after breakfast.

Sorry, boys. It's like 1895 or something like that. This no 1830, like seven ish, 38, 37, and nobody just shot his ass. Sorry, this is more mid mid 1840s. But yes, correct. Nobody shot his ass. They couldn't have, but he didn't. He didn't murder anybody. So he didn't he didn't do anything worth being killed over at this point.

He just deserved to be thrown in prison, where he should have been left. But of course, no. And and again, he just with that with that last thing, he rode off. And while Boone was able to escape the law this time, it was becoming more and more clear that any slight slip up might end up being the last straw. And it was unlikely the judge would give him a second chance at freedom after such a shit show in the courtroom just a few minutes back.

And while Boone continued to age, it seemed his mentality was very firmly stuck in a young childhood like state. He desperately wanted to revenge on the sheriff. He wanted to kill him and put him in his place for even thinking he could be arrested. But whether it just be by understanding of his current circumstances or perhaps perhaps for a moment, he had true realization. He got he did realize even if he got his revenge,

countless men would take his shoes and seek Boone further. And his luck could only last so long. So instead, he was going to try and leave town. But first, like any good young man, he needed a wife. What? OK. All right. All right. Listen, this is Boone doing Boone. You know, you might not find logic in a lot of this man's actions over time so far. And of course, all his life, regardless of the trouble he caused

in the run ins with the law, he was the eye of a lot of women's desires. A wild beast they so assuredly thought they could tame. And while Boone courted many different women, it was the woman by the name of Lucinda Brown, who was only 17 at the time, who he eventually decided he'd want to marry. And nearly instantly after a mere one or two dates, he proposed to her. And while Lucinda was absolutely enamored with Boone, like many of the other girls around town, she wasn't a complete fool

and denied him wanting to spend more time dating him first. And this small act would bury itself so deeply into Boone's loathing mind. All while smile, all while he continued to smile and play the part, he would accept and woo her at every chance he got, doing his best to show what kind of man he, quote, unquote, truly was. And for a full year, he would court Lucinda Brown. And in the end, it actually worked. The next time Boone proposed, she accepted.

And the next time Boone proposed, she accepted. And not only that, both families gave their blessing. They would head to the courthouse to sign their license, making it official. And Boone was a married man. And Lucinda hadn't yet realized she was a prisoner yet and going to be eaten. So far, no one's seen anyone. And this seems, I don't know. We're setting up. We're setting up. You're telling me it took him a few years

to figure out people taste the good. Yes, it did. It took him actually quite a while. I've heard it. I've heard that it tastes that that humans taste good. Yeah, I've heard it smells and tastes like humans before. Have you? Yeah. Cooked. Have I asked this question if you boys could eat? Like if they can grow human tissue, not take. I mean, I like humans like I like sushi raw.

Yeah, you know, raw in life. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, obviously, obviously. But I've asked this to you right before, like if you could eat human flesh that was like grown in a lab, not cut off somebody, would you eat it? I don't I don't know. I don't think I would have the same. Yeah, I don't think no danger of prions or any of that shit because it's grown in a lab specifically for this.

It wouldn't be a health concern. And it wouldn't be the same feeling as eating a person's flesh. Right. That's true. Cut it off of them. But there's something about it that's still extremely gross to me. I don't know if I could put it in my mouth. I'm kind of with you on that. What about you, Jesse? Would you taste a respectfully sourced human flesh?

I guess it depends on what part. You know what I mean? Wasn't there some who like cut off his butt and let his friend eat his butt? Yeah, there. Yeah, there's a few people who eat some. I mean, like on TV, it's like a radio host. I don't know. There's like a thing set like I don't know. I mean, like it depends on the cut, right?

I don't know if it does, to be honest with you. That's what I'm saying. So it sounds like Jesse, it's a yes, as long as it's the cut. Do you want the sweetbreads? No, I mean, like I keep thinking that. You know, I've eaten chicken hearts before. That was all right. And I feel like, you know, I could tap into my ancient roots.

You know, when you eat your enemies and give you power, their power, like maybe that'd be cool. Be lit. You want to eat the heart of your enemies. Yeah, like if I had an enemy and he like died somehow, but like I had his heart in my hand, yeah, I'm not going to lie. I take a bite. I'd be like, yeah. You know, I shot your first tuna of the season. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

You're a man that's easily swayed by a fervor. I love a good fervor. Good fervor. Well, Boone is a man who enjoyed a fervor, too. So I appreciate being warned at a time because he fell into a fervor after his wedding license was signed because he immediately went to his wedding party. And as soon as the wedding party began, Boone seemed to treat his new wife

as a mere afterthought, spending the whole party heavily lusting after alcohol instead. Two would. Yeah, you like that? I love it. I was like, heavily lusting after alcohol. My God, seriously. The two had been gifted.

Luckily, the two had been. This is this is how you know it's a different time, boys. The two had been gifted a house from their parents, a place to put down groups and grow a true home without having to give them to a house. Yeah, right. They gave him a house. That's nuts. I wish they would give me a house. Dude, me too.

We all move in with you. It's fine. I think anyone out there listening right now owns a haunted house. They want to gift all three of us and we just move in there. I'm down. If you've got one, do it. We can do like a reality show. I do it. I'm living in a haunted house. Shilluminati Chateau Chateau Chilluminati. Yo, can I actually say, though, I've been having I've had the past

like months, some really bizarre experiences in this house recently. I just I will. It's a side tangent. I've had two very specific experiences. One has repeated a couple of times. I sent the cupcakes. Oh, shit. OK, so one. I at night when I go to bed

as I lay down, not like I'm in a daze and almost falling asleep, but I'm looking at my phone. I will feel like little pressure points across my leg. And I always feels like one of my cats and I have two of them. And I always look up and every time nothing is bad. That's your question. Yeah, do you have restless leg syndrome? No. Now you do.

Oh, OK, that's what it is. I think that's how it works. Yeah. And then the other one was one night I was resting and there was a large clatter coming from my stairwell. Like it sounded like one of the cats hit the fence and like slammed into it. I jumped out of bed and woke me up. It was like two a.m. And when I went out there, the fence was bent the opposite way that I had put it.

And Blaze was asleep in his tree. And Ali, my other cat came coming down the stairs, like all tired looking. Now, it's potentially possible that Ali knocked it while he ran up the stairs and then came down the stairs looking tired. But I know my boy and he looked like he was asleep. His fur was a mess. So I don't know. I'm just saying I had a couple of weird experiences not saying it's anything.

I'm sure it's possibly explained away, but I just want to put that out there into the world. Yes, and do you believe I'm haunted? No. OK, cool. Thank you. I just had to double check. Yeah, no, not in the least. Well, what's what? I mean, you got to try to document. Yeah, I don't know how to document the weird pressure feeling. I think just I think just when you do it, just note it.

OK, that's it. I can do that. I'll do I want a little note in my phone the next time it happens. OK, good call. I'll definitely do that. Anyway, so he got drunk. They got a home gifted to them. Let's move forward with that. Sounds great. I wish this happened to me. That you got drunk. I wish I got I wish I was drunk

and somebody was like, I got you a house. Oh, yeah, me too, dude. I would be so nice. But instead of the romantic boon carrying Lucinda over the new home's threshold, it was Lucinda who helped stumbling boon into the home instead. She spent the whole night caring for a drunk man, making sure he stayed on his side so we didn't choke on his own vomit to death on the first night they were wed.

And come morning, she cooked her new husband eggs and toast in hopes of helping him with his now splitting hang a hangover and headache. And now that he was married to Lucinda, it seemed that the law could no longer protect her from him. And his mask almost instantaneously fell away. His mood would swing wildly. One moment he was ecstatic about the eggs that she cooked from that morning and the next furious mumbling about tricking him into losing his rights

the night before, but Linda Lucinda had no idea truly what he was talking about. In reality, boon was pissed that he had to go through one full year of pretending to be something he wasn't to get what he thought he deserved. And Lucinda was understandably confused. What she hadn't known was that grudge that he held was now coming forward. And he was finally able to have his revenge in peace. The eighteen hundreds to keep in mind for the listeners and a reminder for the boys or as an obviously awful place to be if you were in an abusive marriage,

especially since at that time marital rape was far from a thought on these people's minds. It just simply didn't exist. The truth was Lucinda was truly trapped in a relationship that the law refused to protect her from that same day that she cooked him eggs. He would grab Lucinda by the hair and a grit and violently drag her into their now shared marital bedroom and forcibly took what he wanted from her while Lucinda raised during a time of submission to their husbands. Simply tried to just survive it.

Could in the violence in the violence from there only ever escalated. And then some kind of on a tangent to this, what I find kind of interesting about boon, especially if you've been playing serial killer bingo along with us every time we do it, is that he has none of the trademark abusive triggers or or traumas, rather, that most receive at that age that we know of the fair that we know of. It seems that the parents were at the very least did their best. There wasn't any noted head trauma that we know of again,

or like Jesse said, early eighteen hundreds. And there we don't think that there was any potential like sexual assault on him. But again, that might that especially would be something we probably wouldn't know about because he probably would have just kept it to himself. But as far as we know, there is no, you know, straight line in what created this this kid, other than it seemed his violent tendencies were praised up until a certain point and then became illegal after that.

And he was never able to kind of fully transfer from one mindset to the next after it became an adult and people didn't want to see him punching people anymore. Beyond that, though, back to the relationship. Boon wanted Lucinda to be the perfect wife. And every infraction in his eyes brought corporal punishment. And his favorite punishment was that of beating her with a belt. Initially, Lucinda really did do her best to hide bruises and cuts. But eventually she just stopped trying and stopped caring

and wore the bruises around town as though it was something every wife went through. And everybody would really realize and quietly know the secret their household held as time went on. But again, nobody dared to do anything about it. And in my in my mind, the town is just as complicit. I understand it was a different time, but everybody seemed to know the town wasn't very big and nobody even tried. And as they were married and time went on,

it became apparent that Boon did everything in his power to not work. He didn't even make enough money to survive and pay the little bills that they had drinking away what little he made. In fact, Lucinda's parents would send her monthly stipends until, quote, Boon would get on his feet. But getting on his feet was something he had no interest in doing. He would run up tabs at any saloon that would let him with zero intent on paying them back.

And when the demands of payment came, they arrived at Lucinda's feet. Also unable to pay them how much. How could they be at her feet? Because if he wasn't going to pay because he would avoid them, he would go to where they lived and Lucinda was almost always the only one home. It she he was out doing whatever it is Boon did during the day, what little work he would do and then he would be drinking. It's fucking nuts, Saks, dude.

Agreed. And she did. She did try to budget for them and she just couldn't manage and try as she might, keeping the house perfectly clean for Boon was near impossible because of Boon. Boon loved one of his favorite things in the world was his horse. He loved his horse almost more than anything, and he loved to bring his horse indoors

and eat at the kitchen table with them every single day. He would feed them off, feed his horse off of his own plate. Always expecting the mess to be completely gone after he got back from doing whatever work he had to bring the horse in again. Is the twist that she's the cannibal? I wish she would be the deserving cannibal. I would feel fine if she ended up being the cannibal, if anything. Oh, God, it's awful.

And so when it wasn't clean, he would beat her, even if it was his own fault. But Lucinda would eventually have a window of relief when eventually one of Boon's mining friends that he worked with had told him about a big gold vein that had been discovered out north and wanted to go out for a few months to gain what they could. Boon didn't give it a second thought. A large sum of gold would get the liquor flowing again.

It will also help with the debts that he's racked up. So he immediately packed and left without saying a word to his wife. Actually, Lucinda doesn't wasn't even informed and only discovered it when Boon hadn't returned that day and had to go out asking what had happened. And up to this point, Lucinda had Lucinda had resigned to her fate. She didn't expect rescue. And at least she could try to enjoy peace for a few months.

All while Boon went out with his friend and his friend got very quickly frustrated with Boon because Boon did nothing. He would hang out and sit while they set up camp drinking. He would drink through the night with them as they all ate. And when it came time to actually start mining, he would do it just for a little bit before quitting and heading back out to the camp to drink some more. He put in no work and realized just how much he hated the mining life.

And much like I said, Lucinda didn't expect rescue. And at least like in those few months she had were nice. But all that changed when after about a month or so, she realized she was pregnant while he was gone with his child, of course. It was then, though, that Lucinda finally found the courage not only to file for divorce while he was nowhere nearby to retaliate or turn it down, but also reach out to both of the families

for help and the help would actually come from Boon's father, Joseph. In an attempt to undo the great shame that Boon had brought to the family name, Joseph Helm not only paid for her entire divorce proceedings, but he paid all the money he could to support Boon's now child, which meant bankrupting his entire family farm having to move out with his wife, living somewhere else, leaving the town without ever telling Boon that they left. He literally bankrupted everything to help the wife and his child.

He left and everyone ditched his ass. They were like, this guy sucks. Yup, immediately. That's why I would have come down with all of them on this. And honestly, for 18, this is the 1840s, late 1840s to this point. I am actually like super impressed and proud that Lucinda was able to do that because so many women at that time wouldn't have even risked it. They would have just wrote it out.

Think about when we talked about a giggling granny, Nanny Doss, and even the time she grew up and how much the women around her. With all those other stories, there was something that kept them. Like it would be the reason she would stay would be like if Boon was a multi-millionaire. And she's like, at least I can provide for my child. This is like this guy is abusive and a bum. Like, nah, he's like, I have his own family is like, yeah. Yeah, fuck him.

We'll bankrupt ourselves to save the child and you from him. So in all this happened, like you said, while Boon was off on his merry way, led by the lie of free gold, because of course, they didn't find any fucking gold. And when he returned, he got to realize just how truly he was now, how truly alone he was now. He went back to his home and saw it abandoned, completely packed up and gone. And while he was mad and frustrated because he had been served the divorce proceedings,

he accepted his law and light and fate and did his best to forget about Lucinda, because in his mind, at least he could go back to the family farm and work and live there in the meanwhile, except when he returned. The farm was gone. You know what? I love this story so far. This is great. This guy's getting everything he deserves. Effless, dude, Effless, yeah. Absolutely.

They had foreclosed the farm, sold it to the bank and the bank was auctioning it off. And he wouldn't obviously not have any money to take that farm for himself. And now, without a penny in his pocket or a place to sleep, Boon began sleeping in whatever stables he could find. Now he was getting desperate. And in desperation, Boon began to write to his other family members, brothers that had left long ago, cousins that were as far as he knew they were. And it wouldn't be long before Boon would get word

that the Helm family tree still had branches in Missouri itself. He was able to connect with them as quickly as he could and would start to begin borrowing small loans to pay off debtors from his uncles, aunts and cousins. Good Lord. And then when he couldn't pay his family back, he would borrow money from debtors to pay off his family. And then when he couldn't pay his debtors back,

he would borrow more money from his family and he would loop that way. He Pyramid schemed himself. He appeared. Yeah. See, you should have heard it. It's what he did when you just owe more and more and more and more every time because interest would accrue and so on. And he put himself in a pit he couldn't get out of.

And while the worst rumors of Boon weren't fully aware by the family themselves and just how cruel he could be, he was still known to be something of a rambunctious person. And certainly not the best spouse. And before long, he would do his best to drag his cousins down alongside him. Why? Taking them out drinking as often as he possibly could. And soon their youthful enthusiasm about the now California gold rush

began to seep into his thoughts. And while he learned how while he learned quickly just how much he hated being minor and going out doing the hard work, the thought of becoming instantly wealthy was very hard to ignore. Especially with how much his family seemed to talk it up to him as the next thing that they wanted to do, but much like him, they only ever spent their time in the local saloon drinking and enjoying life, perhaps not as much as Boon once did,

but really had no true intent at going out to the California gold rush. And on the flip side, the town itself had obviously lost all respect for Boon. Now that he was back home after the mining incident and his family was gone, the sheriff was back up his ass day and night. And the women in the town had lost all luster for a man they now knew as a wife beater. No longer could he engage in the violent delights he once enjoyed nightly, but the eyes that watched him were as hostile as he was. Before long, the thought of running it out to California with family was no

longer a thought, but his actual true one goal. Besides Boon was certain that life out there would be better than sleeping in a stable. And that goal was not to go alone, but to be joined by his younger second cousin, a man or young, young man by the name of, I think you boys are going to love this goddamn name. Little Berry Shoot. What's that second word you said? Little Berry, what?

His younger cousin by the name of Little Berry Shoot. Shoot. Yeah, like bang bang. S H O O T. I'll be your little berry. Yeah. Little Berry Shoot. Little Berry Shoot. Little Berry Shoot. His younger second cousin.

That's a great ass name. What's that race from Final Fantasy 14? That's like the little guys. That's what that is. Lollafellas. Lollafellas. That sounds like one of those. Little Berry Shoot.

Holy shit, you're dead on. Oh my God. Oh my God, I want to make one and take that name for you. Little Berry Shoot. Little Berry Shoot. It's so funny. It's definitely a little twirly mustache for some reason. It does.

I'll be a little berry. Yeah. He's just a little cowboy. Mm, tiny, tiny, tiny holiday. Lollafellas. Oh, he's got to be a mechanist and he's got to be. He's got to have consumptions. Yes.

He's got to have little pistols. Oh my God. A little napkin and blood from his mouth all the time. I think I need to log in tonight because I need to make that character. I'll be a little berry. I'll be a little berry. I'll be a fucking little berry.

Yeah. Little Berry loved, or should I say loved, he very much enjoyed Boone's company because Boone was a wild company and he was good drinking companionship. He was just he was obviously rambunctious and his stories were always fun to listen to. And when the stories that were coming from Little Berry

were entertaining, Boone was a good listener. He was engaging and really like to hype up his family. But Little Berry was also smart enough to know not to go along with any of Boone's schemes. But that didn't deter Boone from at least trying. After a long night of drinking with Boone, Boone spent the night bombarding Little Berry with promises of riches and just needing Little Berry

to just say yes, just come on this one trip, how the two of them could make something of themselves, be rich, establish themselves and find true happiness and stability. Little Berry, however, continued to say no and deny his request. Little Berry had a head on him. Little Berry was smart.

You can tell by his name that he's gonna get ahead in life. But his sureness of his answers seemed to slip little by little, the more drink Boone offered him. Oh, Little Berry. Until eventually very late into the evening, Boone was able to get a begrudging yes from an extremely drunk Little Berry

agreeing to go out on this California gold rush on a journey with Boone. And Boone, who was not quite as drunk as Little Berry, was ecstatic when he finally got the answer he wanted. And when the drinking finally came to a close and Little Berry went home, Boone spent the night packing what few belongings he had, sleeping a bit before sunrise

and making his way right to Little Berry's house where he knocked ferociously at the early hours of the morning. Little Berry opened the door and obviously groggy and still either inebriated or extremely violently hung over, he simply let Boone inside. And Boone's joy very quickly melted away

when he realized that Little Berry had done no packing whatsoever. And not only did it seem like he was not going to go on the journey, it seemed he was more settled in than he had expected Little Berry to be. Just the night before, he had agreed to Boone that he would go

and his word should have been his bond. When he brought this up to Little Berry, Little Berry struggled to say yes, saying that he was still thinking about it and it would take a long while before he'd be ready to go if he'd be ready to go at all. It was a long journey to go on

and he had a life here and a house here. Doing his best to gently sidestep a potential fist fight with a man who reveled in them, he did his best to be diplomatic. But perhaps for the first time in his life, Boone's rage grew beyond that he could control. The ice cold look that he'd trained himself so well to maintain had dissipated.

And before Boone, he saw a liar and a man who couldn't stand by his own word. Damn. What kind of man does that make him if one at all? Damn. And for the first time in his life, at least according to Boone, Boone blacked out. And when he came to,

Little Berry's shoe was only inches away from him. And when Boone looked down, he saw his hand covered in a warm red blood and his bowie knife buried to the hilt. He killed Little Berry? Yeah, he killed Little Berry. Little Berry should have shot. That's what he should have done.

Oh my God. He didn't think it was gonna happen. And in his bowie knife, he had buried to the hilt and Little Berry's chest. God damn. Before anything else could be said, Little Berry slumped to the ground, the knife sliding out as easily as it had likely slid in.

And his cousin died right by his feet. He killed Little Berry. He killed Little Berry. That sucks, dude. Bro. Around Boone was evidence of some sort of struggle. It was clear he didn't catch Little Berry entirely by surprise with blood smears here and there

and other things knocked over. But in the end, Little Berry had nothing to defend himself with as he wasn't expecting his own family to kill him. This would be Boone's very first kill, all in a rage over a broken word that was made drunkenly. And Boone knew it would only be a day or more before this body would be found.

And luckily, he had already packed up his belongings in his house and his horse was ready to go. And for Boone, it was finally time for him to leave town and explore the monster that had always lurked deep inside. And that's what we'll pick up next week. For part two and the very final part of the story of Boone Helm. Son of a Kentucky cannibal.

He killed Little Berry. Or it is it? I'm so mad. Definitely. He's the first of many. Good, sir. There's a few more that are going to be followed to be. Little Berry's shoot, man.

Little Berry's shoot? But at least Little Berry's shoot didn't get Little Berry eaten. You know, he was left dead in terrains all over the world. Andy had a violent act in his name and neither came into play, which was mind blowing. None. It is.

It's crazy. I missed out that first time I got to really step it up. Little Berry's shoot was the perfect guy to eat. I didn't even know. He sounded fucking delicious. If I bit him, he had fucking Bavarian cream filling inside. Oh, it was going to be delicious. I think you guys are going to love the next episode

because the stories are just as insane as the ones that happened here and only get worse. And his end is fitting for one of a Wild West justice. I hope the whole piece of dynamite blows up and then the whole building falls off and he's standing right where the window is. So the building falls through and he's standing there at the end.

And guys, speaking of places that are from the Old West, come see us in Austin, Texas on May 26th. We'll be there and you can be there, too. If you go to chilluminatipod.com. Is that right? That is bingo correcto. Bingo correcto. Just remember that phrase, chilluminati pod.

Try it out on Patreon. Try it out on on on any podcast app. Try it. Try it. Try it right here. Just just say it out loud. It gives me words to power. You know what I'm saying? Let's all do some spells. You'll get this like weird fan web page

where they highlight every like entertainment cliche type thing we've done, which was fascinating. Remember that thing I sent you out? Yeah, that was actually quite upsetting. Like it was like a little bit too good. It was very, very, very good. Somebody was listening to the episodes

many times, very clearly. That's it for us, guys. We'll be back next week. The conclusion of the Kentucky Cannibal. Thank you so much for listening. We are off to record a minisode for patreon.com slash chilluminati pod as we do every week. We record except for last week

because it was a minisode compilation. Oh, that's right. I'm 36 now, boys. I'm in my late 30s. I had my birthday. Sunset. I'm on my way. The sunset has begun. It's all uphill from here.

You know, you think you think society has told you it's downhill. I'm like, you know, about to have the best years of your life. You're about to be like at the full I don't care stage of life. You're like, yeah, baby, I'm in. Let's go.

Let's do whatever. I'm down. All right. That's it for us. We're off to do a minisode. Thank you guys so much for your support. We love you and we'll see you next week. Bye.

Goodbye. Anyway, me and my wife were sitting outside indulging on our porch one night, enjoying ourselves. I needed to go to the bathroom, so I stepped back inside. And after a few moments, I hear my wife go, holy shit, get out here. So I quickly dash back outside.

She's looking up at the sky in the fall. I look up too and there's a perfect line of dozen lights traveling across the sky. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.