Chilluminati Podcast - Episode 251 - The Tall Whites with Arin "Egoraptor" Hanson

Episode Date: May 26, 2024

This weeks guest Arin Hanson joins Alex and Jess as Mike takes them through the insane lore behind the Tall Whites and the man who met and vomitted at them all. MERCH - http://www.theyetee.com/collections/chilluminati Special thanks to our sponsors this episode - All you lovely people at HTTP://PATREON.COM/CHILLUMINATIPOD HelloFresh Ghostbed Jesse Cox - http://www.youtube.com/jessecox Alex Faciane - http://www.youtube.com/user/superbeardbros Editor - DeanCutty http://www.twitter.com/deancutty Art Commissioned by - http://www.mollyheadycarroll.com Theme - Matt Proft

Hello, everybody, and welcome back to the Chaluminati podcast, episode 251. As always, I am one of your host, Mike Martin. Today, joined by the Bubbles Blossom Buttercup of L.A., Jesse, Alex, and very special guest, Mr. Aaron Hansen, none other than one of the game grumps, one of the grumps, one of them, you've seen Aaron fucking everywhere, voiceovers in plenty of cartoons, video games. If you know the name, Aaron Hansen, you probably have heard of him and seen him in many of things. Thank you so much, Aaron, for joining us, and welcome to the show. Thanks, man. Which, which Powerpuff girl am I?

That's a great question. Actually, we spend about four minutes at the top of each episode talking about this because he always says we're someone different every week. What is it? Bubble cup, Blossom? Blossom bubbles and buttercup, the Power Pump girls. Come on. Bubble cup is it great. That's like a, that's a fusion, dude. I was going to say it's like a fucking DBZ fusion of one of them. If someone get that, can we get an artist to draw that on the subreddit? Oh, somebody already has. I feel like I'm bubbles. You're definitely not, I would say you're definitely not Buttercup. But I don't know. That, that's, that's, Maybe it's just because I'm totally blue right now, but that's just me.

Jesse's Buttercup then. Oh, I'm Blossom. You blossom? It's the red hair. Aaron Buttercup, how does that feel with you? How does that land on your shoulders? Aaron's Buttercup's the angry one, yeah? Yeah, the green one.

All right. There you go. I'll take it, man. She was always my favorite anyway. Yeah, there you go. Yeah, welcome to the show. Usually it'd be top of the show before we even dive into anything. Alex has a question that we like the level at all of our guests to kind of gauge some a bit

of your, well, I'll leave it to Alex. Alex, why don't you take it away? Yeah, I don't know how familiar you are with our show, but there's three of us. I don't want to say it's because of this. It's just a happy accident. But we kind of have landed into the three roles of like the believer, the skeptic, and the dude who smokes weed. So first of all, where do you land on paranormal government conspiracies, aliens, all the different things that we do on the show? Where are you at in that zone, first of all?

I think as long as it. doesn't get racist. It's just fun. We learn we use that lesson quite often how quickly things like that can get racist. Very, very fast. That is that is that is a very, very good description of what it feels like to open up a book of 101 incredible UFO stories. It's I, I had somebody in my life who was just go like going harder than I had ever heard before. You know, I've I've, I've, I've read and watched videos of, of certain things and read little articles and kept track of stuff. And, And I'm like, oh, that's neat. This is neat over here and stuff.

And it's just kind of fun little hoo-ha. And then this guy in my life was just going off about like, bro, there's like space brothels. And like, and I'm like, what? And he's like, everything you see in sci-fi movies is true. Like, watch this. And I'm like, okay. And I watched the documentary he sent me. And I'm sure y'all have seen it.

I don't remember what it was called. But it was, like, it started out like fun. And then about an hour in. then it started getting like, uh-oh, and I had to turn it off. On unsavory. Do you think it was directed by the guy whose uncle works at Nintendo? Possibly. I don't know.

Well, that's my dad. So my dad works at Nintendo. Oh, well, nice. There's only one guy that works at Nintendo and it's my dad. That description of a documentary could be so many different documentaries I've seen that they just got to a point. You're like, uh, we've crossed a Rubicon here. That's what always happens in the lore episodes.

We're getting very racist very quickly. So quickly. It's so fast. The deep lore, though, is it keeps getting more racist the deeper you go in to the point where one mask off. It's like, oh, no, there's like multiple aliens. One mask off. But they're all controlled by the tall whites.

And you're like, wait, what? And they're like, yeah, they look like Nordic people. And you're like, what? They're the cleanest of the aliens. Yeah. You're like, what? Can it just be funny, silly little guys with the big eyes and they run around going, like, why can't it just be that, you know?

Yeah. Just give me that. Anyway, it's a wonderful world we live in. So you said, as long as it's not racist, it's just fun. I love that. Do you have, despite your chill attitude towards this type of stuff, do you have any, like, personal stories or like that time your grandma saw or whatever or, you know, anything that like floats around at when everybody's a little tipsy at Thanksgiving or whatever?

Yeah, I do. I have one thing that happened to me. I've wanted to see a UFO my whole life, and I've never seen one. And I saw... I've tried, just literally screaming in the yard naked for them to come and they've never shown up. Seriously. And, you know, I've heard the story, like, I was sort of knew someone tangentially who could

like summon them. You know, there was like, and it's like, oh, look, there's a new dot in this guy. That's crazy. But I never saw him do it. Anyway, my story involves, I lived in Palmdale for a brief period of my life, which is like, you know, over an hour north of L.A. Kind of out in the middle of nowhere. Oh, I know it will.

Yeah. It's not a great place, but it's close to an Air Force base. Shout out's Palmdale. And I was driving home one night. It was like 2 a.m. from L.A. And I got trapped behind like this convoy. And it was like a military convoy and police. And they were escorting a flatbed truck that had like,

I just the most stereotypical like saucer with a dome on the top uncovered and they were just blasting through lights and this was in a time where the phone I had was a sidekick and I tried to take a picture specific era yeah and it was just there was it was not happening I was I was like snapping picture after picture and it was just like complete in total darkness I was like this sucks

I oh my god at a time where that kind of instant information sharing wasn't, it's still budding, it's still growing. Yeah, exactly. And so I throughout the years, kind of looking back up on stuff and finally this like declassified like drone ship came up that kind of looked like what I saw. And I was like, okay, I think this

might be it and they were just like testing it and like bringing it back or something. But it's from the angle I was looking at it. It's like, I like can't make it up just straight up like Looney Tunes ass like just with the alien inside. The boop on the top and then.

in there. Dude, it was crazy. I love that. Just banging on the glass. You need to take over Earth. That was fun. That was my only experience. I never saw anything in the air. Nothing like more than I ever got, man. I mean, props to you for immediately being like, I wonder what that was factually. Let's Google it. Yeah, because it's obviously, most of this stuff is that.

You know, I'm sure you know that guy, I wish I knew his name, who just like immediately debunks everything with fucking like flight paths and stuff. There's a lot of people like that. But yeah, there's a, those people are needed though. Like, if we're going to figure out what's actually anomalous, we need to be able to strike out what we know is R-Tech or something in like a satellite or whatever. My feeling is, like, if you're right or die, if you're like, aliens are fucking real and people need to know the truth and all that shit. If you're like truly like fox moulder ass dude, you should be like the biggest proponent of like debunking.

Yeah, like figure that out for real. Like, let's get definitive answer. Yeah. Stop giving me a hard time, internet. when I say it's not real and you're like just just he's ruining the show it's good because if you weren't here there's been one episode where it was new were not here

and we had Santel in place and shit went off the rails for oh it was crazy was it that was a threat for me to the audience about what happens when Jesse's gone but what about like ghosts or anything like that you ever seen anything like that or like a weird thing in the woods or anything like that

not really I I've had a few oh man there was one recently that was like, that was fucked up. It was like a, it was just like a, oh man, what the fuck was it? God, it's like, I saw my dead grandma. Something just like a door hinge was just like, and I was like, oh, man, that's wild that that just happened.

I have no earthly explanation for that. Yeah. It was something like that in a hotel room or some shit. Bro, I happened Alex in a hotel room on our last fucking show that we did. Yeah, that was about a year ago almost. Wow. That long ago. God, damn.

I don't know, I don't know what any of that stuff is, like, where, we're, like, something like, like, uh, uh, door knob shakes or anything like that. But it's really, like, I feel like, as far as, like, what paranormal experiences are that people describe a lot, like, a lot of them are easily explainable as, like, something that you didn't see right or something that you didn't understand or something like that. Yeah. But the ones that are, like, parrot, like, uh, what do you call them? Poultergeistee? Those ones are real. They feel real to me.

Well, we're stuff where stuff just gets like fucked with. Like you're in your kitchen and then like a fucking pantry door like opens. You're like, oh yeah. Like I don't know. That feels real. I do. You know, I remember, well, first of all, I just want to be clear before I tell this story that I, even though that is my mindset on this stuff, I am by no means not a total wuss about it. Like I, oh yeah, I fuck it. Like, like, Me neither. If somebody's like, this room's haunted, I'm like, okay, I hate this room now. Yeah, let's avoid that one.

I'm never going in here. It's terrifying. Bro, I run toward it for my own problems. Like, where is the ghosts? Show me the ghost. Oh, yeah, I'm like the complete opposite. But there was, so we, I have, I'm in a band and we went to record at a studio called Sonic Ranch. And Sonic Ranch is like a live-in studio near El Paso in a town called Torneo.

and it's like right on the border. So there's like a non-zero amount of like cartel activity that happens around there. Yeah. But there's a room in that studio that's been dubbed the blue room because everything's blue in it. That as far as I know, I don't think this is fabricated, but like one of the family members who owns, who owned that farm that it's on was killed by the cartel in that room. and it's the most haunted room in that fucking house. And the stories I've heard of that place are like,

like literally people walking in on like somebody sleeping in bed and the bed's like floating off the ground and like, you know, and from my own bandmates too, like there was one guy who was producing on our album who was like, I walked into my room. I have the same routine every day. I come in. I lock the door.

I throw all my clothes off. I pass out on the bed and then I wake up and I do the whole routine. And when I woke up that morning, my shoes were like, laces tied like right at the door facing forward. And like I locked the door. It's not like anybody came in and like clean the room or anything. That's the type that's so messed up. I've heard a lot of stories,

but I've never had a personal experience. I will say when I walked into the blue room, I was like, no thank you, not staying in this room. Fuck that. Like, do you ever feel the vibes? Yes. I'm huge on like energy. Whether or not it's true, you know, I just, I feel a certain way about a thing.

And I'm like, okay, that's the energy that this thing's given me. And the blue room sucks. I hate it. Every time I walk into it, I'm like, nope, don't want to be in here. Don't like this. Yeah. It's like the Palmdale of the rooms. Yeah, exactly.

Was that before or after you were told that it was a bad? Okay. So that's an interesting question. And it was before. Ew. Okay. Yes. We were being, because you get a choice.

of like what rooms you want to stay in. And the blue room is one of the nicer rooms. So we were walking through those, the rooms and looking at them like, oh, cool, cool. And then we walked in the blue room and I was like, ooh, I don't like this room. And then they were like, funny story about that. And I was like, oh, okay, interesting. So yes, I did get that feeling before. But again, you know, my skeptic brain is like, I've heard stories about like the frequency

that fear gets created at or whatever. And it's like there's certain rooms that like orchestrate the bouncing. around of that frequency or whatever where I'm like, okay, maybe there's something to that. But, you know, I don't believe that there is a ghost of a murdered man in there. At the same time,

it's fun. I always think it wouldn't be like to do that ghost, never to be able to leave that one room, always there, angry, never able to murder again. But like, is it you know, if we're going to get on the ghost train, like, is it a ghost? Could it just be energy? Could it? Like, there's that's why it opens up too much. I'm

curious if they painted it a different if it was no longer blue or they moved out the furniture and put a new, like haunted houses, refurbish that thing. Let's see what happens, right? Like, who knows what to go on? Jesse has talked about his family's clown room that feels haunted, but is not haunted. No, no, no. And my parents' old house in Kentucky, there was, this house was built next to a Civil War battleground and near what was an Indian burial ground that was removed then made into a cemetery. If there was ever going to be a haunted location. That's it.

It would have been there. And one of their bedrooms had this creepy yellow wallpaper with paintings that looked like they were from the 1800s and it had a vibe. And I was like, if I was ever going to be haunted, this is the place. And nothing ever. So that's where I'm at. Or I'm like, it should have been the spot. Yeah.

The signs were there, but I got nothing. Yeah. There's a lot of spaces that I've been into where it's like an old Victorian house, you know, from the 1800s or whatever. and it's like so many people have lived here, so many people have died here. And I'll spend a lot of time in those houses and just be like, I didn't feel a goddamn thing. It was fucking quiet. It was like just a pleasant experience.

And there was nothing where I was like, what was that? Like it just, it was great. It's fine. Yeah. That's how it'd be. I think, I think the creepy vibes is like just like really aged, mature, like fine, like wine, like, liminal spaces that have like stood the test of time. I think is like what haunted houses are. I think they're just like off spots that people like go like, oh.

And then it just reverberates. That's how I feel. What's called the new sphere? That's where it is. The new sphere? Is this like new age ghost stuff? New sphere is like it's not new age ghost stuff. It's like new age pseudoscience regular stuff.

We were talking about it on the, and I don't know if it's pseudoscience. Like I'm not, I'm not going to roast it. I think I think there's something a little bit. real about it, but it's the idea of a little bit real. A little bit really real, like pseudo-science real stuff. Like pseudo-reel. Look, real adjacent.

I, look, if you have, if you're interested in the newsfeer, check this out of Patreon.com slash Chalminati pod. Just kidding. Boo! Boos, man. No, the news sphere is like an instinctual, like, energy field that we can, like, that we can access as living things and maybe there's like a human one for example

and it's it genetically stores or like in a radio space or somewhere some sort of idea of a sum of all of our species knowledge is somewhere and you can access it somehow and it plays into some UFO theories it plays into some

ghost theories it plays into some actual science and like the guy who made it is not like a wizard or anything. He's like a regular guy. I think. I think. I hope he didn't like do malpractice. Wait, wait. So it didn't exist before and then some guy. It's a theory. Thank you. No, it's a theory. It's a theory. Hold on. Hold on. All right. We're getting there. We're going to get there. Oh my God. We got a show to do. I'm going into this. No, we're doing a, we're doing a cuckoo bird newsfear episode. No, we're not. Right at the beginning. I, did you know the work I put in these goddamn episodes. We're doing the episode. Alex. The news sphere is nonsense. Sounds like nonsense.

But it's fun nonsense. In a fun nonsense. And a fun way. because it's one of those things where it's like the force. It's postulated. There was a way that we were all connected and we could like reach back into the past and we can connect with. Sounds like somebody's first mushroom trip. Verdonsky put it forth and made it popular. He's like a it's more philosophical but it's like

it's like a theory that there may be something that we can access it as living things that contains the knowledge of what our species has learned instinctually. Why not just like write a novel? Like why why make it a conspiracy theory? I think it's real.

I think he was, I think he was being earnest. On the ice walls of earth is one day. No, you do not. You don't need to introduce anyone to that. You've already done too much damage to general knowledge by doing two episodes on it. I am not done any of that.

And I am not at all about to do that today. I think that's the inherent problem is done too much damage. Everything we talk about in this show, everything. Even the stuff we're going to talk about today. Yep. Is somewhere there's someone that had a good concept for something. And rather than like,

I don't know, add to collective knowledge of mankind. They were like, I'm going to make my fanfic version where the aliens took me to space. And it's like, all right. Well, you've set us all back tremendously. But thank you. That's the vibe of most of what we cover is some dudes like, she was beautiful, the alien. She became my bride.

I put a wig on her, though. And it's like, why do we need this? We didn't need this. I'm just sitting there asking, why not me? Yeah. You know those aliens with the big eyes, the gray round heads, bald heads? Imagine all with tits. Oh, there we go.

I got you. I can help you with that actually. Oh, hello. Yeah. That's a good play to camera joke for a podcast. He does it a lot. It's the same joke. No one can see this right now, but it's fine.

That's the hottest thing I've ever seen in my life. So hot. Immediately bricked up. I'm good to go. There's a book. There's a sci-fi book on my reading list. And it's sometimes I'll go to like vintage bookstores and I'll just like pick up some like one dollar book or something that looks like shit.

And there's this one that I picked up that I got to read. And I, you know, I might bump it up because of this. It's called Ta. It is, it is sort of known. Yeah, it sounds familiar. But the idea is that it's like an alien planet and the plants are hot. Oh, yeah. And so the cover is like a dandelion with huge titties.

Yes. Oh, yes. Fuck. I got to introduce you to the man who paints his alien encounters, and it's like gray aliens with tities who fuck him. It's phenomenal. It's not, no, it's not phenomenal. No, no, no, no. It's funny. No, no. You're just living life at that point, man. Yeah, exactly, brother. See, I'm with you. See? Top shelf erotica. Top shelf erotica. All right, we got to talk about the fucking episode today, gentlemen.

And speaking of talking about tall whites, but not racist version. Today's episode is all about the tall whites. Is that what they're called? Is that what people call them? They're literally called the tall whites. They are called the tall whites. They're like the vest aliens. They're like the ones from like the 70s.

Even not the tall whites that I've taught you about. These are different tall whites. Like I said, non-racist tall whites. I'm pretty sure by the end of this. This is going to be racist. I'm letting you know. I'm pretty sure. They don't just look like Abba?

I promise you no. All right. It's about the story about the tall whites. and possibly the most boring man to ever have walked the face of this earth, a man by the name of James Charles Hall, who was the one and only person to ever directly talk to and encounter these tall white beings. Up top, I'm just going to go say my, you know, reference my two main sources for today's episode, one of the most boring documentaries in the world called Walking with the Tall Whites,

followed by one of his six books, millennial hospitality because after the first book, shit just gets impossibly weird to follow. So don't worry about it. You know what we don't need? Millennial hospitality and walking with the tall whites, this dude needs to figure out his titles.

Can I be pedantic for a second? Please, please do. His name is Charles James Hall. Oh my God. You said James Charles. Which I, which I googled. And it immediately like filled in the blank and made me search for James Charles Halloween costumes. James Charles?

Who the hell is that? Oh my God. James Charles Halloween. Oh, no. Charles James Hall. My brain absolutely flipped those two. It sounds better the other way around like phonetically. But that's probably why my brain did.

Anyway, he is arguably the most boring man that I've ever read about. The book he wrote is written in the most dry, painful way. And he, even the way he sounds, the documentary was only an hour and 20 minutes. And I hope you can hear this. I'm not to plaps a button. Hopefully it works. Mathis, do you hate this guy? No, but I wish, I wish he had gotten somebody to, like, help ghost write.

You just had a rough, you just had a rough week reading. On Amazon, I went to go see when walking. with the tall whites came out. Because in my mind, the way we talk about people on this show, they're usually, they made a documentary in 1974. This came out in 2020.

Yeah. And what's even crazier about this is the image that shows on walking with the tall whites. You'd think that the cover of this movie would be an alien face or some sort of like UFO. It straight up is a man's face, one fighter jet, and then walking with the tall whites.

I don't know what most people think of when they see this, but I don't think it's aliens. Oh, yeah. Yeah, you're right. Yeah, a little, like, fantasms there. Yeah. Maybe they're like little, maybe they're like living lines of cocaine. But they're so small, you would not notice them. And again, big bold letters walking with the tall whites and then it's a fighter jet.

This image that's showing up on Google image search that's, it's like a couple times. I think it's like a, like a woman tall white, and it's like a green eyes. and it's like kind of stretched looking. There's something like weirdly erotic about it. I don't know. A lot of that out there, man. That's pretty much it. This is exactly what I'm talking about.

This is like the pre-green alien vibe of aliens from like the 70s where everything just kind of looks like a Jared Hess movie. You know what I'm talking about? You know how deviant art kind of has a look? Even though it's a bunch of different artists. Yes. And it's like that's kind of how it is with alien art too. I don't know why it all.

kind of looks the same. Like how menu art for some reason. Every diner has the same artist somehow. Yeah. Same thing. I don't know. There's something about alien art. It is a little erotic. So I'll send this link to the dean so we can slide it into the episode. Oh. But you only need to listen to the first

like this few seconds I link you to understand the sound of this man's voice and how it's so hard not to just fall the fuck asleep, listening to him talk. I press play. Hold on. I've got switch accounts. Don't people to know.

Yeah, I got to hide this. And the shrapnel killed him. He dropped instantly. And although I was in the tower above him, it had wooden sides and stuff, so it stopped and the wooden floor, and it stopped the shrapnel. So it didn't blow off any wind. There's no concussion with the mortar shell, and none of the glass or anything was harmed. Oh, is this guy right here?

Yes, that is the man. This is the man that the tall whites interacted with. And so as I looked there, it looked like he was play acting. It looked like he was an actor and he wasn't very good. He sounds like how my grandmother used to speak. Like Jimmy Carter. It looked like he just crumpled. I thought he was play acting.

They kidnapped these guys because they target them because they know nobody's going to believe this fucking guy. Exactly. It just took me away. Exactly. See, you're on the right wavelength here. So that's a picture of him. And basically, at the very beginning, beginning of the book, there's a foreword by his wife that basically she just is so mean to him.

Because she basically explains in the foreword that, and I'll just read this for a little bit, a small quote, over the last 18 years from time to time when I enter my room where my husband sat at the computer, I noticed that he would quickly shut the screen that he was working on. When I asked him what he was doing, sometimes he would answer nothing or just relaxing. God, just relaxing. Other times, he would say that he was working on a book. In May of 2002, he became unemployed. After he was doing all of it.

After he was a month in unemployment, this scenario repeated itself. He said he was working on a book, his book, and I said, quote, well, you know, if you die tomorrow, there's no way I'm going to go hunting through that many files to look for whatever book you're writing. I suggest you print some of that out right now. I'd like to see it. That's what she said to her husband. And he said, which book did you want to see?

And she said, what do you mean, which book? How many books do you have? And he said, a couple, three. so naturally when she says when I saw some of the chapters I was determined that we publish it I felt it was excellent material and it should be picked up by one of the major houses

but I knew that it would take time but I knew that it would This is good shit She goes I knew it would take time And since no income Since no income was coming into our house We decided to self-publish The manuscript

Yeah no way It's just easier The manuscript needs editing badly partially because he had started the books on an old Tandy 2000, and there were technical difficulties in retrieving them. But the other major problem I had with the book was the macho language that he needed to use. Stop, dude.

Is this written by Mon Flanders? This is literally the forward of the book. My daughter and I were up to the task of editing the material, and Charles was much in agreement when we told him that the story was so good, the swear words added nothing. And furthermore, deleting them would make them a book appropriate for mid- We were robbed. society was robbed.

The voiceover is like, these fucking aliens that came out of their goddamn ship and there they were. Fucking around, tall white, giant bitches. That was amazing. Reminiscent about the death of my friend.

Fucking Clinton's in the room. The last bit she goes as well, Charles worked hard implementing all of our corrections, but then inadvertently used older and unedited files to compile the CD to send to the publisher. I will leave out some of the drama that followed. It slowed things down considerably. And because we were so

anxious to start marketing our books, I had ordered 500 copies of millennial hospitality before I saw one bound copy. We decided to re-edit immediately, and Charles sat for days and hand-edited some of the worst mistakes from the 500 copies we already had in our house. If you have one of those- This is the foreword of this book? Yes. If you have one of those copies, they have already become collector's items. That was then, and this is today. The day it is. The day it is. is that you are beginning to read millennial hospitality. The day that it is today that you are. Is there like a pretext here of like, oh, this is like an epic tale that like is it was

in the making because it feels like self reporting here where it's like so just so you know, this is the ramblings of a crazy man. I just want to make that clear up front. All right. Read the book now. It's his wife. This guy's a piece of shit. He's crazy and he couldn't get this shit published on his own.

Also, the language is fucked up. Have a good time. money. He wouldn't get a fucking job. All he was doing was working on his Tandy 2000. Honestly, I'm just surprised James Charles has a wife. So she ends up by saying we both hope you will enjoy reading. And if you've not

already read Millennial Hospitality 2, the world we knew, and Millennial Hospitality 3, the Road Home, we know that you will want to read them as well. There are six. Millennial hospitality could not be a worse title for a book to have than a number

and a subtitle. It's called a millennial. It's called millennial hospitality. Yes, it is. Sounds like a textbook. That's just staying over at my house, dude. That's like Tostitos and Ranch. That's it. That's what it is.

Yeah, so there's six books all told over 1,400 pages of text. No, I did not read all six books. I read just the fucking first one. So if you want more, just know there's a whole world out there after this. And this man is, like I said, other than being boring, it's his boringness that makes him uniquely qualified to be the individual that this all happened to. He looks like if J.R. Tolkien was the snowman from the beginning of Rudolph,

the red nose reindeer. What? What? It's been bugging me this whole time. I was trying to figure out who he looks like, and it's that. Again, I can't tell if he's trying to be subversive in his work, because if you look up millennial hospitality, the book cover is the painted version of him next to what I assume is a cactus.

and I couldn't tell you what this was about. Don't worry. I had a hard time trying to piece it together too. Millennial Hospitality 1 and Millennial Hospitality 5 and Millennial Hospitality 3 all seem to have really similar bookups. Self-publishment. Well, what you're not getting is this subtext. There's a whole lot of negative space above him, right, which is to imply that there's something out there. Yes.

Oh, damn. Slightly. Tush. Microsoft Word Art. for each title, different, like, stretch flat. Let's dive into this man's life, his experiences with the tall whites, what they are all about, and what he was actually doing with them. And as always, kind of just start with a very quick profile of who this man was.

Who Charles James Hall, I'll just be referring to as Charles from now on, was born in rural Wisconsin and was a curious and adventurous child. He always eager to explore the world around him. He was very just kind of inquisitive. He grew up in a loving family, surrounded by a lot of nature. his father was a World War II veteran instilling in him a kind of a strong sense of duty and honor to the country. His mother was a devout Christian and taught him the values of compassion and empathy.

And these early influences would later guide him through the challenges and wonders that he would face, both in real life as he would join the Air Force and as he took on this tall, white, years-long event. As a teenager, Charles developed kind of a keen interest in science, particularly astronomy. He spent countless nights gazing at stars, fascinated by the vastness and mystery of the universe and read a punch of books about just space exploration, dreamed of becoming an astronaut, and really just wanted to discover the secrets of the universe. For some reason, I thought I saw a hand raised, but I think it was just the delay in my camera. I was like, who's raising their hand?

After graduating from high school, Charles enlisted in the U.S. Air Force, and he hoped to serve his country and maybe get a chance to fly out into space, but his dreams were dashed when he was assigned to Nellis Air Force Base as a weather observer. Disappointed but determined, Charles embraced his duty and performed his tasks with diligence and dedication. His life at Nellis was routine, uneventful. It's not that it wasn't without its challenges. It was a harsh desert environment for one. There's a lot of isolation, constant threat of danger just from military exercises to test his resiliency and adaptability in the moment. But Charles seemed to take it with stride and learn to survive and thrive in this kind of unforgiving new environment of his. Charles Hall's time at Nellis Air Force Base

was not entirely uneventful before his encounter with the tall whites. In fact, there were a couple incidents that kind of, I wouldn't say foreshadowed his extraordinary experiences, but kind of are interesting in that they kind of frame Charles as a hero, something that we're going to see throughout the rest of the story, where Charles always seems to be the guy that they just needed in the right moment and he was there and he could help. The two incidents at Nell's Air Force Base that are mentioned within the first book, the first being involving six aircraft that were stuck out in the desert, circling an area for 30 minutes

running out of fuel. In one evening, Charles received a call from the control tower, informing him of these six aircraft that were trying to return to base, but were unable to land due to a sudden dust storm. Visibility was near zero, and the pilots were running low on fuel. And so Charles, with his knowledge of weather patterns and his quick thinking, devised a plan to guide the aircraft safely to the ground. He used his weather instruments to track the storm's movement and relayed the information to the pilots. He then directed them to a specific location where the dust was less dense and enabled them to land safely. Basically, Charles knew the wind real good and that was what they needed to have him land these planes. Don't shake your head.

Is any of this corroborated? Or is this all from his book? What more do you need than the words? What a great honest question that we will never get an answer to. We can corroborate that yes, he was part of the Air Force and he was in the Vietnam War. this particular incident, you know, why would he lie? Like, is there anybody in his life other than his wife who's like, you know what, this guy's trustworthy?

I believe him. Like, is there anybody? I mean, not, not into the degree where they're willing to say the events that follow might be wholly truthful. Is there anyone who is not financially invested in his success? What does that mean? I need you all to just open up your third eye, my bro. And you open up your third eye and just put on your believing pants for today, Jesse.

just for me, please? Because that's, I mean, that's the stuff that is exciting to hear when somebody's like, it's like, this guy's so awesome and like he's always been, and then this happened and whoa, you know, so like, I don't know, I don't believe in aliens, but like I like him, you know, that's the stuff where I'm like, oh, that's interesting. But this, this all seems like, like Mary Sue fan fiction. Yeah, which is pretty much. That's most of it.

Even the stuff that we've covered, that's like the most believable that has corroborating witnesses. You know, I think of what would you say this is the most believable story that we've covered on the show? About aliens? Yes, about aliens.

I was going to say, JFK's assassination, very believable. Yes, excellent. That was done because of the aliens. I don't know. Betty and Barney Hill is probably the most. It's pretty good. The most famous for sure.

I don't know if it's because of the co-op- Everything about it, everything from the way they describe the aliens, way that people talk about them as a couple to the way that they reacted. Like the whole thing has a vibe to it. That's like out of all the stories, it's the most believable. Do I accept it completely? Not really.

But it's the best one by far. Even like today, initially the plaintiffs did Travis Walton. We're going to do that next week. But even his story, all the people that were involved, some of them later came out and said the whole thing was a hoax. So like even those types of stories are filled with reasons to kind of like put to the side. Benny and Barney Hill is one of the,

one of the more tighter cases. I like the one where the guy's pants get ripped by the alien that rips his pants off. Yeah, that's right. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. The man's pants.

It's like, it's like, tired tracks and shit. And he's like, it like ripped my pants off and it like hit me with a flame thrower for like one second. And then it like, and then I passed out.

Yeah. I'm like, oh shit. What a Thursday. And yes. Yeah. Yeah. And yes, Charles was stationed at Nellas Air Force Base as well.

Like he was there at the times he's saying he was there doing the job he supposedly was supposed to be doing there. But because everything's so secretive and whatnot, you can't corroborate if any of the alien stuff that happened actually happened to him. But he's not lying about where he was, the rank he was and being part of the military and all that. That was real. I always wonder, I always wonder how they justify like being the only one telling about it. What's, what I think going to be interesting is that all the ones that we've covered that are insane, like Project Serpo, like last, like last weeks, this is the one where I'm like, if he's making it up, he could have done such a better job. Like there's, it's not like, it's kind of almost sad. Like the story is kind of almost like, I pity the man.

You can't use someone's inability to tell a good story to be like, it could be true because he was so bad at telling you. I can't, but I just did. And we're just going to, you know, the biggest problem with this is for some reason, we also give a lot of credibility to this dude. was in the military. And already he's above everyone else. I'm like, that doesn't mean, that doesn't mean that this story's true. Agreed. That would be like, he was a teacher for 25 years. Right.

Never had any problems. And he saw an alien. So he's credible. Like, you can say that for anything. What's more, I'd say valuable. If you want to put value on this, of this is like a lot of what we know of the various quote unquote alien races and the lore all are rooted somewhere. And like, this is this, this version of the tall whites is the first time these kinds of like version

show up and you're going to see the similarities between a little bit of similarities to the Nordics but also the tall whites that are look like grays but like command the grays that we kind of briefly touched on years ago is this hold on is this why it's so when we went through Aaron we did like a whole video episode or whatever thing one time where it's like every single alien race that exists that we know of yeah and at some point there's rehashes it's like okay so there's tall whites they look like like like angels like Nordic and But then there's also the tall whites, and they look like a little different. And there's so many different versions.

So this is where the other tall whites come from. This is the origin of those. Okay. The less racist tall whites. There's like the Hitler tall whites and then there's the alienish tall whites. Well, this is like, but these tall whites control the grays. Well, that part, that's one of the theories of people who say they've been abducted, have seen them with the gray.

So there's some theories there. This is like regional workers. The tall whites control the grays. Yeah. Of course. obviously. You're following, right, Aaron? It's all true. What if it's all like every single one's real? And they're just, they're just chuckling at us from afar. Bro, the reptilians in the tall white just sharing a piece of like blueberry pie.

Human? Human jerky? Human jerky? That they got on the way to alien Vegas. That's right. Dude, hold on to the Vegas thought. Just hold on to the Vegas thought. What do you mean? What does that mean? No, just hang on to that thought. Hold on to that thought. This is going to be, I'm telling you the story's great. So yeah, he's a whole. He first one involving, like, landing these aircraft. His knowledge of the wind essentially helped him land the other other ones. Then there was a second incident that happened while he was there, which was a little bit more personal and somewhat embarrassing.

Charles was invited to a social gathering at the officers club one evening where he found himself in the pleasant company of his superiors and their spouses. And he was feeling a little awkward, anxious, out of place uncomfortable as he tried to just kind of blend into the background. But his awkwardness did not go unnoticed. And one of the wives of the superiors, a woman known for outgoing, personality and love of dancing, approached Charles and asked him to dance. And despite his initial reluctance, Charles eventually agreed, and they took to the dance floor.

To his surprise, he found himself enjoying dancing, and he and his partner twirled and swayed to the music. They were laughing, having such a good time. This unexpected kind of turn of events boosted his confidence and helped him feel more at ease in the social situations. But what he didn't realize is that the officer was a jealous husband and didn't want anyone dancing with his wife. But he wasn't anywhere nearby. And that's why she approached him and decided to dance. don't shake your head like that in disbelief jessie this is very real you've seen the man he's no i've anything this is the one thing i believe a jealous husband i'm oh yeah no that sounds right the next morning he got a call uh to come into the office and speak with the officers uh who's

husband who's uh the husband of the husband of the wife and he fully expected he's about to get his ass completely reamed out he's about to get punished and yelled that but instead of uh instead of him getting yelled at he expressed gratitude towards charles and he explained that as wife had been feeling lonely lately and isolated due to his frequent absences because of work. And he thanked Charles for being kind to her and for bringing a moment of joy into her life through their dance last night. And she, she was very happy when she got home.

Are we talking about Archie right now? What is happening? These are the two incidents he puts in his book as the weird incidents that happened before the tall whites came into play. So just to let you know, the kind of life this man was living. There's more to this. That's it.

No, is he telling his story about how he cut his, I think that's what's happening. Yeah. Yeah. Fuck her next time. And I was like, thank you so much for cucking me last night. I just, she needed it.

I needed it. I don't, but what does that have to do? What's the A to B to C to tall white? Listen, I can't tell you what the A to C is there, but he made me learn that. He just included the story? He put that in the book for me to learn. Now, you have learned it and your brains forgot something useful so that you could remember what I just told you.

Is this supposed to be like, this is how he learned to ingratiate himself with people and how he, well, again, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, once I learned from from this family, I felt like I could bang anyone's way. I would say the first story of his like knowledge of weather patterns is what got him the gig in that area in the first place. The second thing was I guess he's just a really approachable guy that anybody is willing to approach. So it's really valuable. Aliens even. But you literally say it like that, but you, I mean you're correct in that tone.

Like even. I'm aware. Oh, no. I wasn't joking. This is what I assume is the plot. Yeah. Okay. All through the.

His time in the military, though, in its free time, he still pursued his passions that he enjoyed as a kid, reading scientific journals, attending lectures. He even built himself small telescopes to observe the night sky. It's just, you know, he was always kind of interested in space. Is that truly what this part of the story is for? Like, is he actually justifying why he was abducted? He's like, listen, you know, I'm not just any guy, dude. They took me because I'm the best. I'm a fuckmaster, bro.

You would think, but wait until we keep. talking because like the way he paints himself is not the most like heroic picture at all. So yeah, he's out there doing his thing now. He lives out there kind of working on that base at Ellis Air Force Base. And his life and his

the journey he was about to take, he was fully unprepared for. Now before we move into his first encounter with the tall whites, I need to quickly educate you about one of the base's biggest legends. First encounter. Oh, baby. First of 14, baby. Oh, settle in. Just you wait. The first thing I can teach you out is a legend that was on the base known as Range 4 Harry.

Huh? Legend of Range 4 Harry was well known around Nellis Air Force Base long before Charles showed up. Will you just say that one more time? Yep. Range 4 Harry. The number 4. F-O-U-R. Range 4.

Like, he belongs on Range 4. Harry from Range 4. Got me from range 4, but they call him range 4. Range number 4. But not a range 4, Harry. Correct. No. Harry who lives on.

That's how I heard it too. Like a charity event they do every year. Range for Harry. This one, this is for Harry. No, like Harry who lives on range number four. Gotcha.

Gotcha. This is like a super well-known like tale around the base. It was a legend whispered among the airmen, a story of a mysterious and elusive creature that roamed the vast expanse of the Nevada desert. I'll let the book describe the legend. Quote,

Range four Harry is supposedly a, horse that got too close to an atomic bomb blast that was set off way up at Frenchman flats back in 1954. It was right after the blast that people started seeing him. He's been down here out on range for ever since. The radiation burned him real bad, so usually he hides up in the mountains. But on warm summer nights, he comes down to the valley and roams the number four range up at Mojave Wells. One side of him glows a soft fluorescent white. No one knows what the other side of him looks like. Everyone who is... He never turned.

Everybody was just on the one side. He's always exiting stage left. Just never any other way. It's like a living moon. Everyone who has tried to walk around him and look at him from the other side has gotten... Has died. Has gotten burned pretty bad or attacked. What do you...

Wait, really? Oh, that's the excuse? Correct. You can't see his other side because he'll burn you. This is like a fallout character. What the hell is this thing? Either way, they've all come back scared stiff. If you see him, don't ever try to walk up in front of him and look him in the face.

Harry doesn't want anyone to see his face. A few people who have seen him from the front say his face is a human-like, but very unusual. But very unusual, he is said to have large blue eyes and his head. is real large. They say his face looks sort of like the face of a horse

and his tail is made of long blonde hair. Whoa. So this. Like a horse? Potentially. A horse. Is a horse?

Is it some sort of horse human hybrid? Yeah, something like that. There was a rider and it nuclear fused the human into the horse. Probably like persona five

fusion of like personas. Awesome. That's amazing. Range four. Harry's kicks ass. He's a fucking. I love it. Range four,

dude. And Charles initially laughed at the idea, but nobody else on base did. They all took it very seriously. It seemed like everyone was terrified of Range 4, Harry, among other things that were happening on base. The man he was sent up there to replace a man by the name of Sullivan, even explicitly warned Charles never, ever to go out on Rangers 3 and 4. And then to just make up the winds you're supposed to record in the weather for those

areas because nobody fucking checks anyway. And only ever stay on Range 1. Range 1 is the only safe place to be to be. I was like, and this is the man Charles came up to replace. Sullivan did what he was about to do for four years. I'm so pissed off. There's no fan art of Range 4 Harry. Also, for safety reasons, for safety reasons, Charles never uses a last name and

changed the first name. So we're only getting first names that are completely changed from the actual person's name. That actually was on the face. Range 4 Harry has the last name. No, no, no. Talk about Sullivan, Sullivan. Like Sullivan. It's actually range for Larry, dude.

Sorry. My name is Range 4, Larry, you motherfucker. This is Range 3 Larry and range four Harry, and they have territorial disputes every so often. Haritorial. This is also, not only is this a book where he talks about the time I slept with my boss's wife. Which is badass. He did not sleep with his boss's wife. He only danced.

Sure, sure. Dance. Yeah, yeah. But more. But also it's government and military negligence. There's like, do not do your job. Just peeling back the curtain. Don't go stay on range one.

Don't go all the way out to four and don't record any information. You know what that sounds like is like the like environmental storytelling of a horror video game. They're like, yeah, stay at range one. But watch out for range four. We've had some reports. Never go out to range four. Yeah. And if you do.

It's the note you find in the first chapter. Yeah. If you do, but don't. But if you do, but definitely don't take this. flashlight with you, it's the only thing bright enough to hold this camera and this lighter. We're sending you out to go investigate what's going on.

Yeah, no. Also, by the way, this is a great argument again for like, why didn't you just write a, like, I would read the Range 4 Harry book. Yeah. That's awesome. Get a sick comic artist. I'll watch, like, he sounds sick. Yeah. And if anybody

everyone wants to like, if he wants to fight crime, you just turn. You just did the porky big Everybody, like, so perfect. How about it? Oh, fucking caught me off guard. I haven't been this hype about something in a long time, all right? I'm glad you're loving the story of Rage 4-Herry. Now we've got to listen to the rest of this stupid story.

We need Rage 4-Ary. Does he have a big M-16? Yeah, so quickly, Charles quickly learned that no actual work was actually done on those ranges, at least not the work that he was sent out to do, like, the weather measuring and to, like, jot it down and shit. No actual weather balloons were being sent out. They were just left on the ground. Wind recordings were seemingly random as air.

men were just too terrified to go out into the range. Charles was confused as to why he was even sent out here in the first place if everybody was just going to tell him not to do. This is his explanation for why it definitely wasn't weather balloons. Is that what? I don't know. No, I don't. Yeah.

Yeah, all right. Dude, nobody was doing their jobs. The weather balloons that were on site were deflated and busted so it couldn't have been them. Little did Charles know. His very first encounter with the tall whites was about to be actually had. One night, while Charles, Charles, Charles was out kind of patrolling the ranges in his truck out on his duties.

He caught the glimpse of something that seemed to be peeking out from behind a nearby sagebrush. He stopped the V truck, flashed a flashlight over, and what he saw, as soon as he saw, whatever it was, was a little girl who took off running the minute the flashlight was leveled at her. Oh. But you look confused, Jesse. Got a problem? No, I mean, I'm just curious why little girl's there. I'm waiting for the answer.

I'm excited. Curious but call. Is it a tall little girl? I like the way you think. Aaron, your mind's in the right place. You had to pick one color to describe the little girl. I might go with white. So,

cool calm and collected, he went back into, he threw his truck in drive and followed the little girl in his, in his truck that popped out from the nearby sagebrush. What he saw as he eventually cornered her into a thicker sagebrush area, when she stopped moving, what he saw was approximately three feet tall, white skin,

but not white as in like us like pale white. How many feet? Three feet tall. Not tall. It's not that tall. It's not that tall. All right. Their skin was a grower, not a shower.

Dan, she's a girl or another show. Nothing wrong with that. Not white like our skin, but more white like chalk or porcelain. Like paper? Yeah. Yeah. Like an actual like pitch white. I don't know if you've seen me lately, but I've got a whole lot of sun.

That's the same thing. You see my butt cheeks, yeah. But while she did look somewhat human, she was distinctly not human. For one, he described her as much too thin to be any ordinary human girl. Her eyes were also much larger than any humans. And instead of being front facing, they were more on the sides of her head like a deer or a goat would have them. Cool. Don't look like Jesse.

I'm trying to imagine it. Look, my faces are faces of brain activity. Let me have this. It's an audio medium. It's audio medium. Moreover, her fingers were elongated and ended in very sharp claws, realizing that whatever this was clearly wasn't human, he began to slowly and calmly back his truck up to leave. But as he did so, in the distant somewhere behind him, he heard a loud screeching sound that panicked him to the point where he just slammed the foot down on the pedal and he took off. The whole drive back, however, he continued to feel as though he was being watched. So when he finally turned around mid-drive, he saw another white creature, but double the size

of that three-foot-tall-tall-old-old-old-old-old-heed-old-heed-old-heed-old. He just, like, literally just went from 60-100. And then you realize you're in big danger. Mama-bear's around. Yes, yes. That's a, yeah. You kind of, kind of that feeling. So as he floored it back to the weather station, and after getting back to safety, he tried

to logic himself out of what. what he just saw, rationalizing, he said, to say, oh, it must have been some sort of undiscovered genus of seagull that he just saw. I'm sorry, what? Yeah. That was my first thought, too. Right, right. Yeah, that's what I thought, too.

Yeah, maybe it was the biggest fucking bird that's ever walked this earth. Yeah, that's what he, that's what he told himself. He said he told himself, it was just an undiscovered species of seagull, for sure. For sure, that's what I saw at six feet tall and three feet tall. What a day, man, whatever, it helped him sleep that night, I imagine. But before he got back to the base completely, Charles goes on to say that he felt what he described as a presence thanking him for finding a lost child. This caught Charles entirely off guard, freaked him out so badly that he needed to pull the truck over, throw it in park, get out, and bend over to vomit. Oh, man, poor guy.

Okay, wait. How much detail does it go into about this, what communication he got? About that much. He just, he said it was a feeling. It wasn't like a word or an image. It was more of like a feeling for finding a lost child. Somebody was like, did little,

thank you. You are, just a little weird giggle that proceeds and ends every communication. Yeah, that's what you just said. And it made him so nervous, he got out of his truck, he had any puked.

Which marks sort of character quirk will notice from Charles from now on. He vomits a lot. Puking. Puking from being. scared, puking from being tired, hurt, even puking at some points just from how excited he got. Good for him, man. Good for him, man. Good for him for bearing that out. Charles writes and apparently just kind of pukes all the damn time that eventually he would make it back to the base where where he thought he would just go back to the dorm and lay down. He walked in to smell a meal

of an enormous serving of bacon, a thermos filled with coffee, eggs and toast cooked just the way he liked them, all made up by the base chef, a man by the name of Smokey. And through Smokey, as he came back and Smokey had cooked up a meal. Like really talking like late, like 3 a.m., like 2 a.m., somewhere around there. And through Smoky, he learned that the general of the base had somehow already known about what he had just transpired to him out on the range with the little girl alien and said he'll never have to worry about, quote, unquote, anything white out on the ranges. anymore. This came from the chef. Yeah. Aside from like the context of those, those words just being like,

you could just phrase that in a better way. Like, you're telling me that what happened here was that the general went to Smokey, the base chef and said, you better make this guy a delicious breakfast in the middle of the night because I'll tell you what, he went out there and he saw an alien in the middle

of the field, Smokey, I want you to know that he saw an alien, a little girl alien. And when he gets this big ass breakfast that you're going to make from in the middle of the night. I want you to tell him that he doesn't have to worry about anything white on that range ever again. And I literally, the next line of my script is,

now you might be asking, why did the general use the chef? And how did he know? Yes. I tell you, Smokey, it was a little alien. And then when he was driving away, he saw a bigger alien. It was twice a size, Smokey, I swear. It was a big seagull of an alien. Smokey, you're cool, man.

I like you, Smokey. So unfortunately, the book's not like super clear on like how the chain of communication there works. The way I think it works is that the tall whites contact the general and let him know that Charles did like a good job or like whatever. And then for whatever reason, he then, instead of contacting Charles himself, then contact Smokey, who like you said, then tells him to make a breakfast instead of, I don't know, giving him like a panel.

I don't know, reward. I just got a feeling, Smoky, that this guy needed breakfast. breakfast. It's the same vibe as like when you do good at work and your boss gets you a pizza party. A gift card for $5.00. Yeah, it's like elementary school. It makes it more believable in a way, isn't it? In a weird way. Yeah. Yeah. Uh, like the, the idea of it being food is fucking weird. Yeah. And the fact that it comes through the chef is also kind of really fucking weird. Um, and yeah, so like, why does it go through that chain? Doesn't really fucking, doesn't really fucking get answered. Has anyone talked to Smokey about

this? Not to my knowledge. No. I think Smokey. Has anybody, confirmed, Smokey is real? You know? Remember, his name was changed. Smokey sounds a lot like corn pop. I'm just saying. I bet you the name was changed. So I wonder what his real name was.

Okay, I don't know. We don't know. Misty. Misty. So I think this is a great time now to break down the tall whites as a species from their biological, like, a life cycle to a little bit

about where they come from after kind of getting a nice glimpse of them there. So tall whites, first and foremost, there are species of alien that lives 10 times longer than humans do. Averaging around. How do we know that? Oh, don't.

I have. That will be answered. That will be answered. We know, uh, uh, the average. The book of seagulls. Book four. They brought,

they dropped it a little Brian frowd-esque, like, dissection book. Let me just say. I'm like, did you know? You got a feeling of that. There's a tall white,

only known as the teacher that will meet in a little while. Don't you worry. Hell yeah. So yeah, they average around 800 years in age. And when we say tall white, like I said, we're not talking about human kind of white. We're talking chalky white, porcelain white. And they supposedly also glow very gently under low light for one reason or another. Mr. Burns.

Their brains work seven times faster than the human mind. Their whole planet is such a made-up type of fact. Not six, not eight, seven. Very specific. It's like being like, my. car is four times cooler than the average car. Their home planet is slightly hotter than Earth,

which is why they ended up living in the Mojave Desert, something that's a lot closer to their home planet. They're like, yeah, exactly. Yeah, it's fucking freezing out there at night. What are they talking about? With this Nell's Air Force Base, and in alien lore, there's a total underground base where a bunch of aliens

live and work with the government, and these tall whites have, like, presence there. They live there. So, like, I imagine when it gets really cold, they go underground, and, you know, wherever they live. Sure. Yeah, just because sure. That's the exact kind of person,

I like the kind of mood you should have right now. And apparently when it comes to the Mojave Desert, the U.S. government actually gave them a piece of the desert, like legally, like signed it over to them. The aliens? Yeah, to the tall whites. Yeah. Why do they need to own anything?

They're not even. Good question. They pay taxes? He mentions and brings up in the book, a question arises. Why? Because as far as Charles Hall knows, and as far as he tells us,

Tall whites don't enter or take things freely or make deals with anybody unless they are benefiting greatly on the other end. So what did they get and what are they allowed to do? No. James Charles doesn't even understand. I mean, Charles James doesn't even understand. God damn it. Don't God damn it. He doesn't even understand.

No, what I'm saying is he doesn't like the fact that he's like, I don't know why they own it. They must own it for some reason. I'm just picturing the fucking paperwork on this. like what are we talking about who bought it the seagull yeah yes i guess what do they what do they pay what they came to yeah like imagine technology i get we get a piece of their tech um we are even then you can't write so can't buy land i don't put this in the episode if but like they're also according to the book the tall whites kind of use us as like a the planet earth is like a stopover planet where they repair their ships because they like a rest stop very much they don't really like love the human race

very much. They kind of just deal with us. They don't really trust us very much. That's how I feel about them too. Fair, fair. So, you know, there's not like a great relationship between us and Tall White's according to an ex-Air Force man. But they don't, but again, just this one man. They don't like us. They have all the technology in the world. Why

do they need us? Because Earth is out in the boonies and there's not a lot out here. So like, we're one of the few places they can stop, repair, refuel, and then they can leave. Earth is not really in the galactic core, man. But this begs question again.

Imagine, just math imagine for a minute. I want to want to know. You're out in the boonies. I'm out in the boonies. Let's say you're in the middle of like. I lived in the boonies for a long time. I got you.

The middle of America. You're in a small town. Where are you going? What do you mean? I'm asking the question if you're an alien and you're out here in the boonies, air quotes. Is the military air force base? That's where they live.

Where? Oh, like, I don't know, Sagittarius. Athi centauri? Aviciris, bro. Come on. But I'm saying like, like, what I'm asking is it doesn't make sense. Their path of travel, why even stop here?

Listen. Maybe we're in between two awesome spots, bro. That could be it. Go back to Vegas. Maybe the mad Greek is here. Maybe there's some. We're the mad Greek of space soon. Maybe there's like some flavored pistachios.

It's like, what's the name of that town? Oh, God. I'm sorry. We're the death valley of. Yeah. Yeah. Like, are we that town that's like right across the border of California?

That is like the last stop for weed. It has like alien jerky. Yeah. Yeah. It's exactly right. I think that's what Earth is like and it makes sense to me. It's got a fudge factory. It's my favorite part of Earth already.

So it makes sense that it's like the spirit of Earth encapsulated. But I also love that like if it's a stopover planet, you'd think it be like convenient, but it seems horribly convenient to like, like be so secretive about stopping off here. Yes. Like, okay, don't just don't like fly over Australia or anything. Like that'll be fucked up. Like just come at it from this very specific angle and like, and like turn off the sound and like make

sure, you know, you only land in this spot. And like, because people will see you and it'll be fucked up and you'll mess up the whole planet. Like God, this is a lot of paperwork for a fucking backwater planet. So you might be wondering what's the average height of these species if we continue down what these species look like? Six to seven six to seven feet tall. I was going to say, they've gotten as tall as they can get as tall as around nine feet or so. And they go through three very specific growing cycles, baby to adolescent.

And this is when a tall white is at their most dangerous from baby to adolescent. I thought you were going to say fertile, dude. Most white. What? Did I say? You were going to say most white. He said fertile. They're most dangerous, bro.

No. They're most succulent. So the tall whites really get you most excited. I'll tell you that much. Takes a drag of a cigarette. I met the tall wife's general and his tall white wife came over. I said it was cool if you fuck my wife. In fact, I'd always want to be.

cup by a human. No, the tall whites are as a species, relatively reactionary and I would cause paranoid defensive. And at their youngest age, they are extremely reactionary on top of being impulsive and very wildly dangerous because they have those sharp claws. You know, it's crazy that you say that? I, when you described the first, the short white, the little girl, I thought of, my first thought was the little witch from Left for Dead. Oh, yeah. Yeah. That is such a good idea. Where she got like the claws and then

they're saying like they're defensive and they're kind of like, it's like, oh man, that's just, that's exactly what I see in my head. It was soft disclosure, bro. Left for Dead was soft disclosure. You know, I'm going to go for it. It came out after Left for Dead, didn't it? Yeah, Gabe knows. Gabe knows if aliens are really. Wait, so is the assumption here that he, when he was out in the desert and he saw

this little girl? He was so. The little girl was. The little girl was violent. It could have been yes. And that it could have ended badly for him. He was in his truck, so he was safe. That's why he never really got out of his truck. But yeah. They have five fingers?

Yeah. Yes, they have five. What do you suppose the evolutionary advantages of having five long fingers with closets? I imagine defense. That's also something I was thinking of where it's like, okay, if they're, if they're violent or defensive or whatever, like the side facing eyes is like a evolutionary, like not. It's like a prey thing. It's a disadvantage. Yeah.

That doesn't help them at all. They're very, they're a prey-like species. You'll learn that they're very reactionary because they're so fragile. We'll get, like they are a defensive. Oh,

the children have to have the defenses. Correct. Because they are hunted. Yes, correct. Correct. You are figuring whatever was on their planet. I don't fucking know. Dude,

they're being hunted by Range 4 Harry, man. Fuck! Yeah! Motherfucker! Range 4 Harry just became a fucking badass movie that we need to fucking make. Dude. Alien bounty hunter.

chasing these tall whites. I'm obsessed with Range 4 Harry, dude. I think he's sick as fuck. How is he like a footnote in this story? He is way cooler than anything else happening. He comes back. He's going to come back. Don't worry.

Oh, awesome. Don't worry. I told you the story's fucking great. How does that? So, yeah, the kids are extremely reactionary, impulsive, very dangerous. Not until they go into their second adult, a growing phase where they kind of come their wise into adult phase, which is another reason Charles is so good at this job. is because he's so uniquely

fucking boring that the child tall whites aren't prone to feel like he's a threat at any time. I'm dead serious. He's like, stay calm. Stay calm now, child. It fits, man. Yeah, exactly.

You like that, Alex. You got it. What was that impression of? That's him, dude. I only listen to him for about two seconds. I just can't. I'm just trying to think how any of this.

I guess the question is, how long is their childhood cycle? Like, how long are they children? About 200 years, about 200 or 300 years. Shut up. Oh, never mind. All right. So they need to survive for 200 years.

Before they can become wise. So their claws go away? Do they, like, what happens? No, they always maintain their claws because they're always been a fragile species on their planet. Even as adults, they're fragile. But they, you know, when they're out of adulthood and they've, you know, fully grown up, they're not like impulsive kids anymore.

They're more wizened and able to think before. acting. Do they use technology to battle the things that fought them? I imagine at some point they did because they dominate their planet now. So then when did the war with the with the monsters that hunted them end that they still genetically have? We have to make that movie to find out because I don't know. There is the, you mentioned a war that he never mentioned. How did you know about the war? You said they dominated the planet. Yeah, well, because they're like millions of years ahead of us in in terms of technology. They are literally the alpha species on their planet. I don't know how it happened. But you would think over a million years, they would evolve into having not cloth.

That's not something he asked about. I don't know what to tell you. I think they're lying to us, dude. I think the tall whites are liars. So when the tall whites are making love. Yeah. Do they have their hands up in the air like they're on a roller coaster or something? I got to just try and not to.

They interlock their hands together like insects hooking into each other. That's beautiful. It is. It's all about true love. Um, so they can grow six to 70 feet, six to seven feet tall, some going as large as nine. And through their life cycle, they go through three total. This one, they typically have to actually leave planet Earth to go back to their planet

because the gravity on Earth is not, it doesn't help them grow to the six to seven feet tall they would normally be. It's too much. The gravity on Earth is too heavy for them. In fact, on Earth, the tall whites that are walking around typically have a bunch of small children, adolescent tall whites walking around with them, helping them maintain posture. because if they didn't, they'd be slumping over. Shut up. How do they do that?

This is why we do our research here at Illuminati podcast. How can a short white help a tall watch? Documentaries that are pointless so that I will always remember this shit for the rest of my life. How can a short white help a tall white? They like walk around with holding their hands and like providing support. But like pushing up. A little bit until they sit down like when they have to get up and walk. Who holds up the short whites then?

Because presumably they're small enough. They're small enough. They're good. They're good. They're only three feet tall. The gravity doesn't affect them as much. They're just squat. They're chody. It's still not affect them. They have no bearing on what gravity does to you. I'm just saying that's why they have to leave the planet so they can grow without having to worry about that kind of thing happening. You know what I mean? So are they birthing new tall whites on planet Earth? Well, short. Shortish whites.

A little bit. Yes. But in there, but in their facility within the government base. So let's let's move. Let's keep going. After the first growing phase. It's a great place to raise kids, by the way. Oh, absolutely, dude. Let the government raise your kids. you. Never mind. I stand corrected. I thought it was just weight affected gravity, but it's height and weight. So this checks out. I've Googled it. It checks out. Yeah. Science says I'm correct. It checks out. Google's AI that's never steered me wrong. So they grow up and they grow to their adult size, 6 to 7 feet. And then that that's their like, uh, their next and final growth spurt happens about halfway through their life cycle. 400 years old, it's their third one. So they go a baby to

adolescent, adolescent to adult, now adult into their final one. And their final phase of growth actually is the phase that kills them over time. The reason that they die at around 800 is because their body doesn't stop growing at this phase. And they will grow until they have organ failure from too much growth. And that's how they die. Oh, like alligators. That's crazy.

That's like those, every time you see a guy who's like seven feet tall or whatever. Yeah. That's always his story. That kind of, you know what? This may be real. See, it's more believable than Project Serpo was, which kind of sucks, actually, because Serpo was great. But again, the problem, so Aaron, we did this thing last week that was Project Serpo. And the only reason why it was so trash is because it was so detailed with facts that are not like bullshit facts anymore.

Like Saturn's rings or rainbows. And they came from 40 anonymous emails from an anonymous senator that like, but that happens all the time in alien stuff. It's like, the problem is that they did facts that are, it was like, yeah, they traveled to this distant star at the speed of light. And it took them this amount of time. And then people just calculated how long it would actually take to travel there. And they're like, that's totally false. That's not right. And so they have to be like, oh, well, though, the spaceship, though.

Of intense jeez. The alien spaceship was like a different, it's a different thing. And it's like, no. Yeah, but it's different, though. You don't get it. This is kind of fun because it's just vague enough to be stupid enough to be fun to listen to. Instead of getting outrageous. It's especially fun to picture because as he is, as Charles James is describing, he's,

the reason that they like him is because he's so boring. Which is just such a, like, it's just imagine like Hank Hill hanging out with a bunch of aliens. It's like, what the hell is happening over here? You guys. And they're just like, it's cool. Don't worry about it. No, watch this, watch just boo. And then he just pews.

He's crazy. Charles is always doing this stuff, man. He's crazy. Meanwhile, in the background, a really tall one just starts like shrieking and dying. Body works itself apart. Oh, he must be a hundred years old. their eyes are large and blue they sit on the sides of their head like I said earlier but they look human enough that if they wore enough of a disguise they can actually pass as

human like fucking ninja turtles dude that was my thought too like the same fucking thought and guess what they do it all the time because surprise the tall weights fucking love Vegas. They love no. Stop. I'm not kidding you. I've seen one. I've seen one. No, I've seen one. Love Vegas. They think gambling with our

currency is fucking hilarious in a great time. They often go to they often take trips to the strip just to enjoy the nightlife of our humanity. They're just like us. I know several actual Norwegians who think the exact same thing. So I feel like

I feel like if you're going to, if an alien could describe themselves, Vegas is the place that could get away with it. Vegas and like anywhere in Florida. So where do they get their money? I'm sure the government just gives them like a stipend or something. To gamble in Vegas. That's how they bought the land. They just work in a, there's just like a subway uptown that they just all work. This is a huge threat to public safety, but go have fun. They're very sensitive and very reactionary, but also go gamble. And they have four inch long claws on each of their fingers. Right, right. Right. Yeah. But so in order to, in order to

participate, though, in that sweet human Vegas nightlife, the tall whites need a way to communicate because they don't speak English. They're not like fluid in English. So you might be thinking, well, maybe they're just like every other alien. They are telepathic like every other species that we've talked about in some way. And you're like, if you were

thinking that, you're like 75% wrong. The tall whites employ a mechanical device shaped like a small box that's hidden under their clothes that sits on their belts that translates languages back and forth instantaneously. them. And if they

wanted to, they can also use... It's called an iPhone, dude. No, it's a little box on their belt. And they can use that box to also telepathically communicate with them, but they'll, they also have devices back at the base

that are telepathy helmets that eventually Charles starts to wear regularly after he starts to get used to people. Well, I don't know what this. is it. I'll put it on. Whatever you say? I'll tell you what. This is comfortable.

I can hear all their thoughts and shit. This is great. So yeah, they can use that box and these helmets that they later use to also use for telepathy, but it's not an innate ability they have in their mind like the Greys use. It's a technology reason that they can actually do it. But it's more used for instant audible translation of languages back and forth. So wait, so let me ask you a question. so do they speak yeah but in the box

I think gives out a voice and this is all totally believable when you're at the craps table right well yeah you're like four feet away it doesn't really matter all right they got money this dude's rolling dice and like

his dick is just talking to people what you mean on the side of his hip not the center not a belt buckle just on the belt I feel like the house would be concerned about the location of his eyes Listen, the government

He can see everything. I bet you the government reaches out and lets the place know ahead of time. You're telling me, the Luxor. By the way, aliens are real. So don't freak out when an alien walks onto your gambling floor and wants to run some slots. He said they were believable enough if they were able to dress up. So you have to imagine they're just passable.

They look human. Yeah. Slides you a 50 under his ID to get a better room. Yeah, exactly. Over 200 years to their eyes. like slide to the middle of their face? No, but it's like, you know, kind of like around the side and a little bit into the front, but not fully.

Oh, no. I feel like you would notice if someone had even remotely side eyes, like just like a little bit. Never been to Vegas in my life, so I just imagine that's normal. Just seeing people like of all walks of life. Doesn't matter where their eyes are on their body. No, I mean, that's, that's true, but they're still people. They look kind of like people apparently, according to Charles. Kind of like is not the same as like people.

But they wear wigs, they put on makeup, and they wear clothing to hide like their fire features. No, they fucking wear like shitty Obama Halloween masks. Like, that's the only way. Maybe that's what they do. All those guys dressed like Spider-Man on the strip. Alien. There you go.

If you were curious and actually wanted to know what they sounded like when they spoke and not, you didn't use like that translator. Please tell me there's a recording. No. But I can tell you though, is what Charles says, most of it is inaudible to the human ear due to its frequency, but there are bits of the language that are audible to the to the ear. And he says they sound like, quote, a combination of the beautiful lilt of the song of a metal lark and the sharp, short stabs of a barking dog. So if anybody wanted to, any one of you want to take a stab at that.

So they're just, so they're just hearing almost nothing, but it's like, ah, a meadow lark. Uh, the sweet lilt song, beautiful lilt of song of a metal lark and a short. sharp stabbing bark of a dog. Let's hear a metal lark. Oh. That's good. That was good.

Sounded like they were right here with us. A witch getting tickled. It's like your stereotypical bird chirp is like what it sounds like. So that mixed with like the bop bop bha-b of a dog. But that's like low. That's not. I mean, unless he's talking about like a yipy dog. He said the short stabbing barks of a dog.

that sucks. This guy sucks. That's not creative at all. It's not like cool to imagine that. It sounds like it would sound annoying. So after Charles first encounter showing these tall whites to seemingly be to have been mostly neutral around them, tall whites can still be,

he learned, incredibly skittish. And if they feel threatened in any way, they will use extreme. They'll fold. It's like, Dave. I'm out.

This is a bad hand. I'm out. No, they will use extreme force and violently defend themselves from perceived, said perceived threat. Moreover, it's not very difficult to make a tall white feel threatened, apparently. It's very easy to make them.

Like, theoretically, this is due to their, like I said earlier, the physical vulnerability and being aggressive on a hair trigger seems to be part of their evolutionary path. Did they find humans threatening? Well, they're doubly anxious on Earth because an extreme. violent species who loves to shoot each other first and ask questions later, it kind of dominates it. And according to the book, they're so nervous around humans that according to the book,

if you're going to move in any way around a tall white, you must declare your action beforehand, less they think you're about to stand up and attack them. Like Pokemon. Everything from standing up to walking to sitting down, you have to say it first before you do it. Or they might panic. See, this is how I know this is fake, because this is a very, American like aligned kind of it's like oh erase it shoots first and ask questions later it's like

yeah one country like you say fake I say another point for Charles being a boring man yeah land in the fucking fields of Sweden and nobody's shooting first and asking questions later um what tall whites though lack for in physical strength they make up for in dexterity and they can move at a such a speed that they can retrieve and use their pencil-shaped multi-use weapon slash device that they keep within the nearby pocket that can hypnotize, stun, and even kill human beings using microwave frequency weaponry that interacts within the ions of the human body. You're talking about a sonic screwdriver from Doctor Who? Sick, dude.

Can we? I just like, yeah, it's kind of like, it's like an M.I, like a men in black, like, forgetter device, killing device, everything rolled in one. It's like very, very bizarre. And those that aren't violent but friendly still do so with a bit of arrogance and egotistic nature to them. They typically kind of like casually insult the humans they interact with. Not in any like attempt to insult us, but more in a matter of fact that they're better than us sort of way in terms of like technology and way of life. They're like punching down more than they're like.

Yeah, very much. So yeah, yeah, yeah. Which mixed with humanity's pension for not taking that kind of thing well has apparently led to many a violent encounter and even death. of humans in the past who have been trying to deal with the tall whites because they get offended when the tall whites say something mean to them and they talk back and then they die. See, this

it's like these are stories that have happened like where's where when? Mojave Desert. Like who wrote about that? This guy and that's it? It's like oh they've had so many interactions with people where they've done

this and that with people and it's like who? Who? Who's talking about this? Where's that slashed up guy who is at the Vegas table? Yeah, how do we know that a dude got brain zapped? Did the aliens say it? And if so, how do we know we can trust them? Don't worry, I got answers for you.

I still have. I did. Bro, when do I not read like books in water? This is, I'm well researched on this useless information. Research is like such a loaded term here. I just must stress it. It's not that you don't know. It's that oftentimes the stories, like the stories that you tell, I'm like,

what about this obvious question? like, no one knows. Well. And it's just like, all right. Well, you know, for all these stories above, I posit this is the reason why Charles was the perfect candidate to take on this job. Boring to the point of safety around the tall whites, that they not only tolerated him, but some of them even seemed to enjoy his company.

Their arrogance around him became playful. He asks one point about their planet, like what the name of their planet is. And they laugh at him and ask if he knows how to speak their language. And of course, when he says no, they said, well, even if we told you, there's no way you could possibly know it. He even introduced them to propane and propane accessories. Charles, while he was out on patrols, would also see them out there running around on the range at up to speeds of 35 miles an hour. These things were running at. Damn, that's faster than range four, Harry.

Dude, he even did distance running himself, timing himself. to see if that he was right about how fast they were. And fun fact, Charles could run about eight miles an hour. That is a fun fact. That is a fun fact. Ladies. That's,

I mean, look, looking at him, that's like pretty fast. Right? Yeah, yeah, exactly.

He got little, that little, he looks like a hobbit. Yeah. He can move. But he's actually like six feet two, I think. Oh.

Yeah, he's not, he's not hobbit size. So he's a tall white himself. I can still take him. He is a tall point. Truly. Even better,

he describes the way they would run physically. And it's just the Naruto run. Their hands are outstretched. Their body is bent forward. Why is that part of it? And they literally run in the position of the Naruto run. So, you know,

they have that image now at least. So one night when Charles was out doing, Jesse, you got. just again. I'm on the evolution thing right now. I'm just trying to figure out why they would evolutionarily choose, like, why that would be the selective choice in evolution to have them run like Neruda. It doesn't make sense. Aerodynamics, my man.

Prey species. They got to get away fast. Aerodynamics, dog. Then the rest of their body would have been built to speed. They are. They're very, very skinny. You can go faster with four limbs. Maybe not them.

Maybe that not. Maybe not. I don't know. Maybe not. I don't know. You're not. Okay. All right. One night when Charles was out doing his duties, driving around his truck, he saw a generator shed

had a glowing, flickering light coming from it. So having to go check it out to make sure everything was fine. He had been, he stopped over to the potential malfunction, and it was his duty to ensure that basically everything was running well. That's why he would do patrols. He'd just make sure everything's kind of just operational. And so he stepped into the dimly lit shed where he kind of began in his inspection and the hum of the generator was the only thing breaking the silence.

However, after he finished, he made sure everything was good. When he turned around, who was standing in the doorway himself, none other than face to face, range four hair. Yes! Oh, yeah! Oh my God. Wait, so we know what Rays for area looks like? Absolutely. We do. He looks like a horse, kind of. He said he had like a human face, though. A little bit of a human-ish face, yes. What does that mean? Like, when you see a dog that kind of has the eyes of a man? Yeah, kind of. Yeah, I think. You don't know what I'm talking about. You see the dog with her. Yeah, I know what you're talking about.

I truly do. This creature stood tall. Its eyes were glowing with an eerie luminescence and held a strange metallic device pointed directly at Charles's temple. Held how? Because while he may look like a horse, he's actually a tall white. He has hands. Oh, shit.

What a fucking twist. Dude, now we can take the bounty hunter story and it's one of his own. He's his own. Harry, God. He's like Blamey. He's a righteous defender of freedom. It's the Daywalker. Wait, but is he still like,

he's the Grey Walker. Is he still like half tall white, half charred from the explosion? Tall white. He's never fully described like why. Left an X. And like exactly other than then it is. Don't Mathis. Don't Mathis me. I must stress this to you.

If you're about to tell us that Range 4 Harry is like, do not listen to them. The tall wets are lying to you. I'm here to save you from them. This is the greatest story you've ever told us. in 100% because now you're going to be sad. Unfortunately, but we should make a comic that that's how it goes and it can be called range

three Larry copyright avoided. Did he copyright range for Harry? Range 4 Harry is a real guy. Come on. I don't know. You can't copyright that. I don't know actually if you copy wrote. I hope not. I hope we can use that. I would love to write like a single issue comic about the Bounty Under Range 4. All right. Let's

hear. Let's hear who Range 4 Harry really is what he is. Turn around face to face with Range 4 Harry who was holding of a strange metallic device pointed directly at Charles's temple. And from that device, a high-pitched wine emanated from it. Don't worry. Oh, geez. He said, don't worry, it won't hurt you.

So you might, what had happened not too long ago is he heard his knee. At one point, Charles was out. He was doing his patrol. He got out of the car. And as he was getting out of the car, he saw a tall white from one of behind the bush. And it scared him. And he slipped, fell, twisted his ankle, broke. his knee fell into a sage brush and then vomiting.

God damn it. So, you know, it just kind of, uh, it happened. Actually, so that the reason that even happened was because after he tested himself and he was running eight miles an hour, he decided that he was actually going to start training in hopes of one day being able to be fast enough to maybe keep up with them in some way. So one, so one day he was practicing his broad jump and he slipped and fell, smashed his knee, tumbled under the thorn patch.

vomited and now moaning such fucking looney tunes dude this is the training hot rod falling down the end of every gag now he's moaning and in pain desperately

he needed somebody to come help him because mind you he decided not to train on base he went out into the middle of the desert to do this but eventually a few tall whites stumbled across him and as they approached him they were carrying what he described as like an old-timey medical bag He got super nervous and no and the tall whites noticed and even backed off from him because he was so like obviously nervous.

But he quickly learned that the Pentagon was contacted and the government sent over somebody to get him because what they have is the one of the tall whites contacted one of the tall whites inside Nellis Air Force Base who then contacted the Pentagon who then cared enough about Charles's Charles's health to send out like a military unit to come get him and then bring him back to the base. Wait, so where does Range 4 Harry fit into this? So now he's out a couple nights after. He never got his leg properly looked at. He's in a little bit of pain, but he's still doing his duty. He gets to the generator. He turns around. Now, Range 4 Harry standing there.

That's when he touches him to the temple, you know, does the thing to his head. And Range 4 Harry says, quote, don't worry. It won't hurt you. It's a voice that kind of echoed in his mind and the words formed without being spoken aloud. And the voice was very calm and reassuring, but still undeniably alien to him. and Range for Harry gestured towards Charles's knee, which had been injured during that practice, and he felt sudden warmth on his knee,

and basically Rain, for Harry showed up because they needed to look at his knee, and nobody was able to look at his knee because Charles wouldn't let anybody look at his knee. So fucking Rain, for Harry showed up, did a little zap to his head, and what felt like just a few moments as his vision blurred past,

he realized two hours passed because they needed to fucking handle his knee. Hey, question for you, Buck. You're telling me that this man told everyone he hurt his knee. I was out there, I hurt my knee. I was terrible. But then what did anyone check on his knee?

Yeah. And then eventually an alien showed up and fixed his knee. Yeah. Cool. Okay. But didn't you just say that he was in a situation where he, like, got really nervous and they called the Pentagon on him?

Because like, wouldn't they just be able to like touch a thing to his forehead and be like, you're not nervous anymore, child? I guess they respected his wishes and range for Harry got the order to go do it whether he said it or not. They're masters of both medicine and diplomacy. Yeah, they're scary easily. They know what it's like. Yeah, yeah, exactly.

See, thank you, Jesse. And there's a reason. Now can you use that on the bar? No, we get it, dude. So he felt a strange sense. His eyes blurred and moments, like I said, felt like the past, but it was actually two hours that passed. And when he came to consciousness, he didn't feel fatigue or discomfort.

his knee actually felt completely fine and was actually fully healed. So he rained for Harry came over to help him out. Eventually, after this incident, the next incident with the tall whites, a few nights after this would be one where Charles would come across his very first family of tall whites out on on vacation. No, just out on range three or four at night. You know, after the sun goes down. Why are they always just out chilling on the range?

They're just, you know, doing experiments. you got to get some air sometimes jesse yeah see you can't just be underground all the time do you think the kid aliens enjoyed it was this like they're dragged along like when the family takes you to williamsburg and you're just like oh man as we wrap the story up you'll see there is you're gonna like earth you're gonna see there's a there is a reason that they're here and what they're doing here and uh charles is you know very very involved in it so it's not a stopover it's an actual thing there's a let me get to it jessing right now all he is is a guy who is a guy who's a guy that's starting to interact with the tall whites.

That's what he's doing. This just feels very convoluted. This also speaks to what I was saying earlier where it's like, okay, they like warmer climates. But if they're all hanging out outside at night, it's fucking freezing in the desert all the time. Okay, I don't know.

I can't answer the question. I don't know. He would know that too. If he's saying they're out in the day, if he worked in the desert, yes. He would know at night. It's fucking cold. Maybe they're wearing special alien clothes

that keep them warm. No, because they're glowing. They're glowing, Mike. that's what they say, but I know the truth. I know the truth. And we're actually going to get to it in a goddamn sick. Okay, I'll shut up. So as is, he, he's dealt with tall whites before he knows what to do.

He approaches low and slow. Once he's close enough that they notice him, however, each one of them stood straight up as though they were about to be attacked and faced him. But just as, but just as they did, who else showed up but range for Harry again? Oh, hell yeah. Now, at this time, his fucking cowboy hat and his fucking buckles. I'm picturing a rope comes down first and then he slides down the rope. And at this time, there is the introduction of the tele-teleopathic helmets.

And we know that Charles wears one at night when he goes patrolling at this particular point in his life. So, Range 4 Harry appeared wearing himself a what's known as a thought transference helmet, something that the other tall whites were also wearing. And through this, Charles, yes, they were wearing, I don't know what to tell you, they're wearing helmets, Jesse. Through this, Charles tried to relay that he wasn't here to hurt anyone or do anything but to harm them that he was here just to doing his job. But one of them couldn't stop thinking that Charles might run over, attack one,

tear the limbs off of them, and stuff the body into one of those, quote unquote, terrible garbage cans. Oh. Yeah, that was the thought that could happen. After around 10 minutes of this, the family was finally calm down enough. They were able to move over to Range 4 Harry calmly while Harry thanked Charles for not moving an inch during this entire process trying to talk him down. Because Charles's life was in danger in this moment. They could attack him at any moment and Range 4 Harry can't stop a family of them.

It's too many. Even he, the coolest warrior of the mall. even though he's been trained in alien jiu-jitsu. Let's you know how it's serious. Follow-up question. If this is them out in the wild, why Vegas? They love Vegas. Yeah, they're in the Mojave Desert, right?

Yeah, Mojave Desert. There's only one Vegas. Right, but if they're so panicky over everything. Yeah, there are like smaller strips. Why is Vegas? The ones that are fully adults, the ones that have gone through their first two growing phases are the ones that are going where they can handle it a little, little bit more than those who are younger who are the more feral I would call them. Oh, the ones that are

dying. Yes. They got 400 years of dying to go. So like, it's a long time. Like, they're all right. They got time to enjoy it. Do they take the bus? I bet they do. I bet they take the best. They do wear human disguises and they bet you they want to experience the magic of a human bus. The smell of a human bus. Do they eat? Do they eat human food? Yeah, do they go to Guy Fieri? They don't. Do you think that's, they can't eat human food. Their food is rather boring and bland. And Fun fact is one of the reasons Charles tries it at one point and it causes him to vomit. Where do they stay

in Vegas? Yeah, no, weird. They don't, like, they don't sleep over. What's their hotel of choice? No, they'll go overnight. They come back to the base when they're doing. What do you mean? They get fucking, no, they get plastered and they got to pass out somewhere. Where are they going? They're staying at the Rio? They're like a good magic show? Well, they sound like avid gambler, so I don't

think they have any good money to like a good hotel. Oh, I can gamble with your own money. of Vegas. I don't know where you would stay. They're landowners. They are landowners. They own real estate. The Mojave Desert. It's true. The government gave them some real estate. So as that tense tenement encounter, as Charles was making his way back, he was still connected to the thoughts of others because it's a distance thing. You know, there's a distance before it severs. And as he was listening to the thoughts over in the distance, in time, he was able to

overhear Harry tell the family that Charles would never harm them and that he was so much more intelligent than any of the other humans. And in fact, Harry had never seen someone as intelligent as Charles before. Yes. This is the guy who wrote it. And his dick is huge. I mean, it's gigantic. His wife forced him to publish this book.

This was a private book that according to his wife's forward, he would close his laptop every time, be like, I'm not saying. This was the scene. This was the scene that he was writing. Time out. Time out. Time out. I think we're on to something here because,

The wife said she went in there and changed stuff and removed the dirty. He definitely banged that guy's wife. The aliens said he had a huge dick. I'm convinced of this. It might have been a way better version. It's book of all the macho talk, as she called it, would have been left in. What it was? Relaxing.

Just take out this smile. Yeah, yeah. I'm writing my memoirs. Please leave me alone. So yeah, he heard like, use the same cover. What's wrong with the first cover? So, yeah, Harry, apparently, Harry had never seen someone as intelligent as Charles before. never that's what he said in the thoughts that he overheard it's after this that the tall white

seem to take and a genuine says a lot about our military doesn't it does it really truly does oh man it says that even me and any man can become a hero in the right circumstances uh it's after any man lord of the ring yes correct lord of the rings it's a modern day any man any man any man every man every man whatever any man is worse than the every man the every man is like all of us it's like a message of almost. The any man is like, a fucking psycho can do it. You can fucking eat your own poop. You can do it.

Any man. Yeah, fair. Yeah. So after this event, it seems that tall white seem to take a genuine interest in Charles. And so much so that they kind of start like hazing him and like fucking with him on the, almost nightly just to see how he would react. Like a mean science experiment, like a bully in high school who tells you. the pain is just weakness leaving the body.

You know, that kind of like, that kind of bullying. One of my favorite stories is when Charles, apparently Charles saw a white parachute that was floating kind of weirdly outside the gate of the base, to which made Charles immediately extremely nervous and scared and caused him to vomit. He saw the balloon? He saw a parachute looking thing floating out from the gate,

and it made him really looked back. back on the ground and he saw the weather balloons there and tatters and he barred and he just threw the he just threw up yeah uh he also then saw the very next night a piece of plastic he says floating around that looked odd and like it didn't quite belong this made charles extremely anxious and caused him to vomit what's okay okay all right so these aliens yeah welcome to the show aaron 251 episodes and you are taking it these aliens are living on the space with with the knowledge of the U.S. government and Charles is discovering these aliens through just like being around like he's not this isn't being like disclosed to him he's just like

wandering around and then finding these guys so like is there is this happening to anybody else like what like wing is he a part of like how is how is anybody? who like knows these aliens not like observing this guy and being like yo there's a guy from fucking range one who's like hanging out with our aliens like what the fuck is going on with that oh no that's not right when he came to the base they literally said they make up numbers and nobody goes out there because everybody's way too scared to deal with these things it sounds like the scene of men and black with the aliens are like j and they're like pouring themselves coffee he's just walking around and they're hanging out with them yeah yeah uh pretty much kind of it's kind of like that's kind of like

Yeah, yeah. I just walking around the base. It's like, yeah, they live there for some reason. Have you seen the dude that the aliens are hazing right now? Like, should we do something about that? They're really fucking with them. It's all good fun. One of the other things they eventually took him onto one of their spacecraft,

which he goes on to describe uses a form of propulsion that doesn't adhere to typical human understanding of physics. Traveling in these crafts often caused him severe motion sickness leading to him vomiting. While the tall whites, they also primarily communicated with their vocal translators, they used the technology to also telepathically communicate some of the time. And they quickly learned that Hall seemed very sensitive to these things. It would overwhelm him.

It would cause an intense pressure in his head accompanied by immediate vomiting. Do you think all this stuff they said about him was just fake? Like, oh, he's so smart. When really, what they passed around was like, dude, this guy's hilarious. We've never met another human like this guy. This is the cucked general getting back at him for dancing to his wife and sending him here for his job. Because that happened. He got this gig after that.

Oh, 100%. This guy knew it was up. The general was like, sent him to the tall whites. Paul also mentions that tall whites sometimes use high frequently sounds as a form of communication or technology, and these sounds were often inaudible to the human ear, but caused physical discomfort in hall, including headaches, pain, nausea, which then induced vomiting. Is he like showing off?

Like, what is this? What is this big? I don't know. He's like just leave it out. He doesn't have to say that he vomited everything. Like, he really doesn't. And he, and he did probe them about, like, what these noises were for. And they, they refused to explain them.

they would not tell him what they were for. Well, yeah. They just didn't. I think they were like, want to make the human peop? That's what it sounds like. And then once, while the tall whites brought him to the food hall where they would eat, they're just giving him some of their food to try. They knew ahead of time that the food was not compatible with human biology.

They did not tell him that. And on several occasions, he without like, they like just excusing it that he must have gotten sick. So it happened a couple times. He would consume their food or drink, which would result in him becoming ill. stomach cramps, pain, and then vomiting. Yeah. So, yeah. He went through a lot of people.

This guy's got a fucked up esophagus, man. I'll tell you that. Like, yeah, he's fucked, dude. All this was, all of them, like, hung out with him and seemed to at least tolerate his company. But this would all eventually lead to his fate and encounter with a tall white that he called the teacher. Oh.

It all started when he got a call that an airliner had gone down in the Mojave desert. But Charles had known that no airliner was supposed to be flying over that area during that day. And so he sent out a few men to check out the area. And when they returned, they ended up reporting that there was in fact not an airliner crash, but there was something out there. One of his men even returned with a burn on his head so bad that he continued passing out. Eventually, when he came to, he spoke of something that in fact was in the desert, but was not a crashed airline, but something that seemed to look like a plane without wings, my mind, Tick-Tac shape.

Like a cigar? Yeah, or cigar shape. That was on fire in the ground. He shouted for everyone inside of what he believed to be a human aircraft to get out. And when he did, outwalked what he called four pale, tall looking mutant humanoid creatures that came climbing out and were immediately growling at him with a sound that he claimed seemed to be a mix of a horse and a coyote. Okay. Were they on fire?

Yeah. No. They're smaller, like three feet tall. So like four, like three feet tall. So these were the kid version? Yes. These are the small tall white. Why did it take them so long to get out of the burning craft? I don't know. I have no idea.

They waited for him to show up. Yeah, he showed up and shouted for them to get out and they were getting out. The small creatures that were then followed by an actual tall, tall white, who said that they were, don't worry, they were only playing and that he needed to run and get out of here right now if he wanted to survive. They were only playing. Literally said, don't worry, they're only playing and you need to get out of here right now if you want to survive.

So what he told the guy, the human soldier. That's what the tall white said to the human soldier. You know, so very playful children. He didn't believe a word of what they were saying, though, and ran up and tried to grab the woman that he believed, like the mother of these children, and get her away from the fire before two other tall, tall whites came out of the plane. stopping him, screaming at him to get out of here and run for his life already. Because run for his life because the kids were like about to like attack him, I guess.

Still trying to save him, ignoring those people. And he's still trying to save this one of the tall whites. One of them ended up pulling out that pencil like tool, zapped him in the head and called him a stupid pig. And then he had no right to touch the teacher. And he ought to kill him before he blacked out and passed out. What? No.

Oh, that's it. then he was carried back by the guys who, like he was, remember he was passing out because he was burned so bad. It's because he passed out near the fire. Yeah, but he didn't vomit? No, this isn't Charles. This is one of the men, Charles sent out. This is one of his men.

Yeah, no, Charles would have vomited by now, 100%. As Charles was told all this, he was the only one that seemed to have any sort of positive interaction with these tall whites that they went right back to Charles to tell him about it, only for Charles to kind of shrug at them and say, okay, what do you want me to do about it? Like, he just like, okay, why are you telling me this? I don't know what you're all going to do. All right, again, to confirm, all these people on base were like, yo, Charles is a tall white guy. Yep.

So we'll talk to him. Yes. And who are these guys? And why aren't they saying anything? These are like the dudes he said that Charles grabbed to send out to investigate what he was told was an aircliner that crashed when in reality it seems to be an alien spacecraft. Right, right. Right. So they had this whole fucking first encounter kind of shit. And where are they now?

Now they're back at the base with Charles. No, I mean like now. Like, why aren't, you know? Oh, this is not their real names. They're an enemy is kept for their privacy and safe. They're chilling in Cabo San Lucas, baby. I don't know where they are. I mean, I just call them up and ask him about these aliens. You know, there are many, many, many videos of him doing interviews on many, many, many different panels and shows.

And if you can suffer through it, I bet you there's one of them where he answers that question. I bet. It's not one that I listen to. So this teacher comes, now this teacher knows of Charles is coming looking for Charles and decides that he's going to come to the, the teacher came, he's going to come right to the base looking for Charles. So the teacher goes looking,

ended up meeting with one of Charles's men that went out. Wait, what? He just shows up at the page. Yes, just shows up. Angrily knocking on the door like, hey,

right now. More interested in speaking with Charles, be like, I've heard this human Charles is actually a fascinating person. Let's speak with him. This tall white known as a teacher got done up in a ton of makeup, a human disguise, and a wig, and came out to this base,

like Mars attacks? He met a soldier that was out there initially, a man by the name of Brian, where she learned that Charles was actually out for the night in Vegas having a good time. And so she said, Vegas, hot dog. I'll be right there. I'm out of him.

I'll be right out there. I can't away. She said, thank you, and then turned around and left at a speed that wasn't human, according to Brian.

And that was it. She got done all up for that. She ran away with her arms behind her. I imagine she was like, Naruto run immediately out of there. You know, and just zoom to Vegas. So,

you know, with that one attempt to failing, in order to ensure that they get a hold of Charles, they, so the tall whites set up a, a faked doctor's appointment,

telling him that he needed a standard appointment with the local on-based neurosurgeon for some reason. Neuro-neurdo surgeon. And when he arrived at the doctor's office, at the receptionist decks, and this is in the book, I swear to God, a tall white that was dressed up like a woman in a wig

with a doctor's clothes on and like a little hat, had him check in and then made him wait for 30 minutes in the reception area. To make it really believable. Yes, yeah. Well, there was a point, actually. Eventually, he was called in to meet with the supposed doctor where he was instead met what he thinks was either a security agent or something, where they started having small

talk about fruit trees for a while. And then afterward, this security person kind of out of nowhere says, congratulations, Charles, you passed the first test for waiting quietly for 30 minutes before being sent in the building. That was the first test. And he passed. Wow. Man, he's just all about congratulating himself.

Next, he was instructed to leave the building and walk directly straight for a mile without looking back once. And he would arrive. And he would arrive at the place that he would be working on. Don't fall forward, Charles. He's all to wait. Where he would arrive at the new place where he'd be working on base, where he would spend at least six months at a time there with the occasional two-week break. And so, without really arguing or asking any questions, he said, okay. And he left and then walked straight for a mile where he arrived at a small little building

on the base that he was already working on, where he was told that he was now on a new secret mission. Oh, hell yes. One chosen by the Pentagon itself just for Charles, quote unquote, incredible reasoning ability. That's why the Pentagon chose him. Yep. That's what he said. It's just literally Michael Scarn.

And that they never met somebody who has the guts that Charles had. Fuck off. It was Neil Breen. Neil Breen, yes. You know, honey, I love the party of the story where you go on the secret mission for the Pentagon. That's my favorite part. People are going to love that part. Just get the swears out of that, baby.

Do we really have to publish this? Penguin is knocking down. on our door. But you know what? I think maybe we should just put it out yourself. So at this new station, he would finally meet and greet the teacher herself, a six-foot tall, elegant, tall white that he described as, quote, looking upon a beautiful horse. What's his deal with horses? What is his deal with horses? Dude, he's like a horse guy. I don't know what that means, man. Does he know what horses look like? I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. He grew up in the Midwest. He grew up in Wisconsin. He has to.

Dude wants to fuck a horse. That's all there is to it, man. Maybe that's what this was initially was like a weird, like furry porn thing he was writing. And she's like, we can sell this, but we need to change everything. You gotta take out the horse fucking, honey. Nobody's going to read your horse fucking story. Little than he if he's waited another like 30, 40 years, he could be a rich, rich man. Yeah, so this is a new secret mission. Meeting up with the teacher, it's beautiful horse-like creature. And the first encounter with the teacher was as unexpected. as it was intriguing.

Wait, hold on. The teacher is not a humanoid. He's a horse. They're a tall white. Right, right, right. That just looked like a very attractive horse. I don't know what he means when he says it looked like looking upon a beautiful horse. I genuinely.

He thought that Harry was a horse and Harry just turned out to be a tall white. I don't understand. I don't, yeah, I guess. Yeah, yeah. I'm questioned what he is. I don't think he knows what horses look like. Is there like a disease where you just instead of seeing like shapes like you just see horses everywhere? Yes, actually.

So there. I did not. All right. All right. Let's go. I'm ready for this. So here's a question that I wanted to ask a while back. Um, when, when he was approached by range for Harry with his little device.

And he was like none other than range for Harry. How did he know that that was range for Harry? I wrote that. So, uh, well, because he. He had described and supposedly like seen Range 4 Harry before, but not up close. This was the first time he'd had gotten to go to Ranch 4 Harry up close. Exactly. It's like they all kind of look the same.

How dare you first of all? Not to be racist against tall whites, but like how would he, was he like, yes, I'm Range 4 Harry. Like he doesn't know. I maybe because the telepathic thing. Yeah, I don't think so. I don't, I don't buy it. But he wasn't weren't telepathic? There's a lot.

There's a lot that kind of just doesn't get acknowledged. that we just have to assume the telepathic helmet does a lot of things. All right. I don't know what else to say. It's just a helmet that you put on and you know all information is what you're saying. Also the thing that Professor Xavier puts on.

Cerebro? Cerebro. Cerebro. Oh, Cerebro. Thank you. I just, you know, the X-Men cartoon was so good. X-Men 97 was phenomenal.

Cerebo. All the aliens had cerebrose. I don't know, though. They had like an MIB device in their pocket is what they all had. I'm saying they had on base these telepathic helmets. I don't know if they had infinite supply of them. Oh. good, dude. All good. Yeah, yeah. You're asking too many questions at this point. Clearly.

Half of him is irradiated and the other half is tall white. Anybody also looks like a horse, but also if you look at him, you die? This is the coolest thing that's ever existed. There's, there is, I googled Range for Harry and there's like no pictures of him in Google image search, except for there's two a little bit down. There's one that's fucking awesome. And it's like a horse and it looks like there's like blue electricity running through them, and it's awesome. And it's the Y files. What is for range,

Harry? But then there's another one where he's like, it's like green and somebody photoshop the face on him. That's amazing. Oh, that's so good. Oh, I'm going to, I'm going to send this link right now.

This one is. I got a picture of Harry Potter. This one's directly from Reddit. And this guy says, this is what I imagine range for Harry looks like. And this is awesome. He's a heart panel. Yes.

Yes. Yes. I love that. Yes. It's kind of like, yeah. That's horrifying, though. I would hate that so much.

But then he's like, I'm here to fix your knee. I don't know if I would trust him. He's a nice guy. He's a nice guy. He's a nice guy. He truly is. So yeah, remember, Charles,

incredible reasoning ability. Smartest guy in the world. That's why they picked him. He's on the submission now at his new station here, meeting with the teacher herself, six foot tall, beautiful horse-looking creature. He was stationed at the remote Indian Springs base,

diligently recording weather data one afternoon as he finished his readings, a figure emerged from the shimmering heat waves of the desert. Tall, slender, and clad in a shimmering white garment. And it's here he realized that these tall whites didn't actually glow because of their bodies. It was the clothing they wore. Oh my God. That was somewhat aluminum that made them look like they glowed under low. How did he not figure this out until this point?

In Vegas, they're totally fine. He didn't get super close before. Remember? Yes, he did. Fucking race for Harry went up. touched him with a metal thing on his head. Okay, well, that, he, like, zapped him in the mind and, like, things happened. All right.

I don't know why. Maybe he ranjured before Harry's naked. No, he clothes. All right, fine. No, I refuse. No. Part of the legend of rage for Harry is that he glows. No.

He closed. No. No. When they first got together, uh, though interested, but interested in that she showed up, but not remotely afraid as he's dealt with tall white so long. It wouldn't be long before the tall white known as a teacher would become kind of intrigued by humanity in a sense. Her very first question was simple but profound. What is this thing you call love? She asked. Oh, my God. She's. Oh, my God. My people have told the

tales of your lovemaking. And I am intrigued, Charles. What is horny? What do the human means by brick up? Five books? Five books he wrote of this? Six, six books. Six books. Six books of documentary and countless interviews. Awesome. And this is like us, you know, it's not like a very major wrinkle in UFO like culture,

but there is a place in UFO play world where people believe this is actually real. Like this actually happened. It is Googlable. It like does exist up there. It is Googlable. Yeah. Another question she would ask that night is, why do humans laugh?

Oh no. And what do you mean? Why do they laugh? They're fucking playing pranks on them and shit and they don't laugh. He said gambling with human currency is hilarious to them. To Charles, it was clear that her base intention, at least initially, was to try to understand the complexities of human emotions and behavior. Intrigued by her inquisitiveness, Charles engaged in conversation,

trying his best to explain the nuances of human emotions and social interactions. And again, he read the books. The man is not great with words. I imagine very much a Hank Hill attempt. Boy, I tell you what, man, laughing. It's the best. It's so good. You want the movie airplane and you're just in stitches.

I'll tell you what. Some stuff's not ha-ha funny. It's just kind of... You've got a VHS player. I carry a copy of airplane in my truck. Sometimes things are funny on purpose. Some things are funny on accident. All right, I got to go.

It's that mind. It's that razor-sharp mind that he has. It is. It's that end on is a just genius and unbelievable guts he also possesses. I still trap. He also didn't even click with me. They called. They said that he is like he's one of the bravest men alive. The man pukes anytime he gets scared.

I'm telling you. They're messing with them. Like, yeah, this is this general just. They all convinced her to go out. They're like, all right, we're going to send this like really hot alien to go mess with them. She's like, tell me about love. And they're all laughing like in the background. I think that's way closer to the truth.

These initial conversations, too, were brief but frequent, occurring whenever the teacher found herself near Charles's location, and she would appear unexpectedly, sometimes while he was working, other times during his leisure time, and each encounter was an opportunity for Charles to learn more about the tall whites culture, technology, biology, their perspective on the universe, and more. And to answer the question of where we learned all these things, it's through his conversations with the teacher

that we did learn about all the tall whites and how they, you know, their world operates and how, you know, they evolved the way they did. Thank goodness. And it seemed the teacher's curiosity was insatiable. She asked about everything from human history to politics to music to art. She was particularly fascinated by human emotions, often struggling to understand the complexity of love, anger, and joy. And Charles, in turn, shared his knowledge and experiences, patiently answering her

questions and trying to bridge the gap between the two cultures. Their interactions were not always smooth, though, and there were misunderstandings and miscommunications due to the differences perceived in ways of expressing them. themselves. And one of my other favorite stories is over time, he'd spend over six months here. They would be bringing, the teacher would bring along with her small tall whites, children tall whites. And they would have, she would have for them ask him questions. He would also like ask them, like just kind of talk with them and stuff. But on a couple occasions, due to a sudden movement or something he did, like, answered wrong, they would get aggressive and defensive and they

like start snarling and stuff. And it would freeze and you have to wait and she'd have to take them away end their session early and when they left he vomited. So, you know, keeping true to who he is. When he's all by himself, it's just like, yeah. It's like the climate. He just out of nowhere. He's done. One day, the teacher asked Charles about his family and his childhood.

He shared stories about his parents, his siblings, his life growing up in rural Wisconsin. And the teacher listened intently her expression a mix of fascination and empathy. She said at one point, your family sounds very loving, she remarked. We do not have families in the same way that you do. Our children are raised communally by all members of our society. So they're a communal species. That's why this children kind of lean to be kind of all over the place because everybody's being raised by everybody else. As their interactions continued, the teacher began to take on a more active role in Charles's life.

She would often appear during his work hours, observing his routines and asking detailed questions about his duties as a weather observer. jerk him off. That part was edited out by the wife. She was fascinated by the technology humans used to predict and understand weather patterns, and she often engaged Charles in discussions about meteorology and atmospheric science. One day, the teacher invited Charles to accompany her on a little field trip. Wait, they ventured into the heart. They have space travel to other planets, and she's fascinated by fucking somebody who's like,

oh, it's going to rain tomorrow. Like, what? Yeah, yeah. I imagine it's a cutesy fascination of like, it's adorable. your technologies. I think they're playing with him. I think he thinks he's more hot shit than he is. And they're just like,

he's kind of like Neil Green and that he's not self-aware. The way they, he describes them talking to everyone else is like humans. But for him he's special? No. No, they're playing this. He impresses them.

Good job once in this guy. Yeah. Who's coming to dinner? So they went out a little field trip. They ventured out to the heart of the Nevada desert, far from the confines of the military base. And as they walked, the teacher pointed out various plants and animals,

explaining their significant. in the ecosystem and their potential uses for the tall whites. She also shared insights into the tall whites' own technology, explaining how they harness natural energy sources and how they used advanced materials to construct their spacecraft and other devices. Charles was amazed by her knowledge and her willingness to just share it with him. Their field trips became a regular occurrence, each one a unique opportunity for Charles to learn and explore.

The teacher introduced him to hidden locations in the desert, where the tall whites had established secret bases and research facilities. He witnessed firsthand their advanced technology their specificity of infrastructure and their harmonious way of life. In a way, he was becoming the teacher's friend. Wow. Bro, this is all just what fucking happened in his head

when he had that one dance with that general's what. Like she asked them about the weather and then his family. And then she was like, I'm an engineer. I do this stuff. And he's like, that's cool. And this is what played out in his fucking imagination. He's so wordy and smart.

Yeah, man. Maybe that's a, that's a, and he held on to it for decades. Like he never. did like one hit of like some meth or something and just had like this whole. This man did not do meth. You've heard the way he speaks. This man did like I-O-O-O-O-O-Sco one time and like lived this life. He like imagined it for so long.

Through these experiences, Charles understanding the tall whites deepened. He came to appreciate their disrespect, their culture, their commitment to peaceful coexistence, and their thirst for knowledge. He also began to see the potential for collaboration between humans and extraterrestrials as a whole, a vision that would inspire his future work and advocacy. He went on to do other things about like, physics and alien physics and stuff. What is alien physics?

They've got their own reality that they work on. It's fine. Books. What's the name of it? There's one more book he did. Not millennial hospitality. That's not what he is. I also love that this is his idea.

That's what he did, but there's another book he did as well. Oh, beyond relativity. It's good to call. This book is an expansion on Hall Photon Theory, first presented in 1998, his own theory. And recent observations by Hubble support HPT and nothing has come out against it is what he says. Oh, sure. I'll just link. I'll go ahead and link you to the book if you want the paperback version on Amazon.

Real quick, real quick. I've forgotten that this is called millennial hospitality. This was released in 2020, by the way. He's still active. Sure, sure, sure. Do we know why it's called what it's called? Millennial hospitality? Yeah.

Because the aliens and their hospitable nature toward him. Yeah, and they grow to be a thousand. 800. Get it right. 800 is different than a thousand. That's a big difference. You can't just be like millennial hospitality. I know,

but that's what he did. Man, he rounded up. To us, it's nothing. It's nothing. What's another hundred years? Like,

we'll be dead. Who cares? Who cares? Doesn't matter? Yeah, and there's the book, his other book that he wrote for 2020. Like I said,

he went on to go to other things. His own theory about photons that I did not read. I do not know. And I, maybe one day all, if we're like an episode of thousand, I run out of topics. I just,

I just love that. the idea that this guy is like fraternizing with this fucking alien that's being kept at a military base. Yes. And he's like, this gives me an idea. We should collaborate with the aliens. Oh, fuck. They are actually. Like he's like fucking Thomas Edison or some shit.

Like he's like sitting there like pressing his finger to their finger and like a light happens and it like zooms out. Yeah. Like she actually would speak to him about her childhood. Her training as a scientist and her. her role as a mentor and guide to younger tall whites. These personal anecdotes gave him a glimpse into the heart and mind of a being from another world fostering a deeper connection between the two of them. And as Charles's relationship with the Teetcher deepened, she began to reveal more about

the tall white's true purpose on Earth. They were not mere visitors, she explained, but rather caretakers of sorts, observing and guiding humanity's development because they saw potential in humans, but also recognized our destructive tendencies and our capacity for self-destruction. And they love the gamble on the side. It's a typical message we seem to get with a lot of alien encounters where they're like, you're ruining the earth, man, find love, live in peace and harmony. You know, that kind of thing was basically the message.

But moreover, the secondary use for Charles very specifically is that he was told and eventually learned that he was being used to help acclimate young child tall whites to humans because he was so docile and so non-threatening. They could bring children to him and kind of have them fraternize around him as a human to get used to other humans. Dossile. He's a genius. He's a lover. I'm telling you.

That was it. That's why she started bringing children around. She started like, it was because his purpose now was to help the tall whites acclimate their young to humanity. And he was the perfect first step to that. I'm not kidding you. That's in the fucking book. So, you know, it's just true. He would spend two years at this place, continuing to interact with tall whites, learning more about their culture, technology, and so on.

He would witness their advanced spacecraft, underground facilities, remarkable abilities to manipulate energy and matter. He also learned about their complex social structure, rigorous training programs and their deep respect for knowledge and wisdom. So the military just, like, lets them hang out and do their advanced technology shit. They like him. Yeah. It's very sitcom vibes at the military. Because they give some to the government as well. Like the government gets a piece of their tech

Whatever that's worth. The teacher remained his primary contact And through these two years, guiding him through the intricacies of tall white society And helping him understand their motivations and intentions. She kind of became his confidant, sharing her concerns and humanity's future and hopes for a peaceful resolution to the challenges that everybody face. Obviously, the relationship wasn't without its challenges either.

There were moments of tension and misunderstanding the two as they kind of tried to learn each other's cultures. Always left the toilet. seat up. Dude, I bet he fucking did, and that's got to be the worst sin of all. But after his two years were up, he would eventually end up as a temporary sign. His temporary assignment concluded, and then he would be transferred to another base. And after that transfer, no.

After that transfer, that ended, the government literally ended abruptly his interaction with the tall whites, because after he was done and he got moved, he never interacted with the tall whites ever again. Oh, that's so sad. It's like Romeo and Julia, dude. Yeah, that's what I'm saying, man. This guy had friends. He had tall whites that loved him and respected him.

I thought he was the smartest, most not vomiting man in the world. Little did they know. And that is the story of Charles James Hall and his interaction in our only deep glimpse at this version of the supposed tall whites. And I got to say, it's fun, but man can't write an ending. that's uh no no no to be fair i did not read the sixth book like then he was like and then i woke up there's a point

where i was like i'm in i'm in i want to know where this goes like what's going to happen are they going to like have a relationship is this going to like is he going to have to tell his wife like what's good but no they just that's it great supporting cast great supporting that's the story yeah it's just one of those

where like does his the abrupt end make it more believable i don't fucking know jesse i know immediately started looking something i'm looking up this, I'm looking up this, the second book. I need to know. So how does the sixth book end would be? No, no, I just need to know what this is like, is this, you know, like when movie one ends. Yeah. And they don't think they're going to get a sequel, but then they get a sequel.

They have to like start it up all over again. What, what happens? So this, he didn't speak of these encounters until the early 2000s because he was afraid of being ridiculed and so on. But this all took place in the 1960s, mind you, 1965 to 1967. Yo, all right. I don't know. Obviously, I only have access to so many pages.

of this sequel, but the sequel opens with Four Nightmares Come With Many Cares. And then the chapters are The World We New Settling in Valentine's Day

Customizing the Winds Shadow Run, the Rabbit Test. There's one called the Night The Laughter Stopped. This is awesome. He got married after all of this. He got married when he got out of the Air Force. Oh, man.

So, yeah, he wasn't going home. And oh my God, the second book ends with Summers. And the egg just cracked open. This man is writing Game of Thrones. This is amazing. He's just not writing Game of Thrones. He absolutely fucked the alien, dude. He did.

But this is after he never saw them again. And she removed it home. He never saw them again? Nope, that was it. At the end of the first book. We don't, we don't know that. That's what I'm saying. What I understand is that the six books are his two years of dealing with the teacher and

learning all kinds of things. Just zoomed in? Yeah. Okay. It's like Harry Potter kind of. Yeah, I'm not going to read the next five books. I'm not going to lie to you. I'm not going to read them.

So I don't know what happens. It's a mystery. If you want to go read, good luck. It's a tough to get through. Because like he writes, Jesse may say he's writing Game of Thrones, but he lacks the Lord. The oomph. 1400 pages between the six books.

In terms of page count, this right here says, this review on Amazon says, this second book continues his story as the main point of contact between the human race and the tall. White. It's just two years. Like I said, I think this is two years while he's talking to the tall whites. As the main point of contact? Yes, he's the only one that tall whites can be around because he's that cool, calm, and collected and genius and smart. Who the fuck is negotiating these deals where they sell them land and give them underground tunnels and shit? Well, he's the only one that can be around the children, okay? It became like a tall white nanny. This is incredible. Yeah, you want to read them? Go ahead. They're not expensive.

What do you mean? Not expensive. It's $33 for the hardcover for millennial hospitality three. Good Lord. I just bought the Kindle version for five bucks. Hardcover. There is apparently, um, across all the books. Millennial Hospital. Readability and content very high. Thumbs up. However,

repetitiveness and authenticity are very low. Yeah. People are not sure if it's real. If you want to come back for an episode too, I'll fucking read more of these books. But if not, fuck the rest of these fucking books. I'm going to come back for every time you want to talk about this guy.

Because I'm so, I'm so invested in Range 4. I'm so invested in Range 4. I'm so invest. in his fucking alien mistress. Like, this is awesome. I want to, I want a range for Harry video game.

I want to range for Harry comic. I want a range for Harry movie. 2D action platformer range for Harry. I can't fund shit, but I'll play the shit out of it. So I had to look up why it was called millennial hospitality, because I'm going to let you know, I did not believe you when you told me that was a.

Why would I love? It literally says, millennial hospitality is a series of etiquette books for the 21st century. It suggests how we want. I interact with aliens and answers questions the readers had. Like I said, him talking to the millennial and how nice they are. That's a great premise, by the way. I would read a book that was like, this is an etiquette guide based on what I learned from

the aliens. That's what like the pitch of the book because that's not really how it reads. Like that's rough. By the way, this whole like framing of him really reads to me as like, it's a Mary Sue character, but somebody told him that the character. he used to have a flaw and he can't cut his general he vomits that's the flaw his wife yeah that was his wife his wife his wife and his daughter were his editors his flaws that he barps yeah so like they were like perfect in this book you got to have a flaw stop sleeping with the other and the

general's wife jesus uh well thank you so much erin for joining us and uh jumping on chluminati i can't believe that's it oh that's so disappointing that's two hours and 20 minutes of man you you you fucking got your hooks in me and then you just fucking let me go into the ocean, dude. And you never saw them again, the end. And that's when I know you'll be bad. Now imagine 250 episodes of this bullshit. That's why I love this fucking podcast. You can fucking do anything. It's like when you go to someone's house

and you leave something over so that you can have an excuse to come back. They have to come back and get it. When we do another one, I'll let you know, my dude. But yeah, I very much appreciate you. Is there anything like big going on that you like want to shout out or where people can find you online? I mean, I know where most people probably have our audience nowhere they can find you, but still.

what's something what's something what's something good that people are doing head up to range four this weekend yeah after this no question harry at range fours it's the bar I don't know what am I watching

what am I listening to are you watching anything good anime wise I'm about to I don't know if people know Indy Mouse but I'm working on starting an anime podcast with him so oh cool we're gonna watch first but I don't know go kiss your love

loved ones. Tell them how much they mean to you. That's probably the best answer we've ever had. I'll be honest. Best answer any of my guess I've ever had, period. Thank you. I'll go kiss my mom. It's very, very chill. Thank you. Thank you for joining us. We're off to go to a minisode for this week. It's over at patreon.com slashulminati pod. We appreciate you. We love you. We'll see you next week. Goodbye. Bye. Bye. Hello, everybody. Welcome back to the Trulminati podcast. As always, I'm one of your host, Mike Martin, joined by the, I don't know who the, I don't know who They are.

There's two. Terrence Hill and Bud Spencer. No. Leo and Trinity. Oh. I don't understand. And I probably never will. Let me just tell you right now that there's two.

Kennedy and Claire Redfield. I'm telling you, I think he literally just looked up famous duos. Cheech and Chaw. And he's been going through the list ever since. I'm trying to dig deep. Which one of you is Dick Powell? Me? Your name's Jesse Cox.

As a naughty podcast. As always, I'm one of your host, Mike, Mike Marcy. A shooting star, a shooting star across the sky.