Chilluminati Podcast - Episode 55 - John Titor Part 1

Episode Date: June 19, 2020

Patreon - http://www.patreon.com/chilluminatipod Thrillist Article: https://www.thrillist.com/entertainment/nation/john-titor-time-traveler-predictions-story BUY OUR MERCH - http://theyetee.com/collections/chilluminati Soundcloud - @chilluminatipodcast Jesse Cox - http://www.youtube.com/jessecox Alex Faciane - http://www.youtube.com/user/ThatOneLaserClown Art Commissioned by - http://www.mollyheadycarroll.com Theme - Matt Proft End song - POWER FAILURE - https://soundcloud.com/powerfailure Video - http://www.twitter.com/digitalmuppet

It's Jeep 4x4 season. Make your next adventure epic, and hurry in now for great deals. Now, while qualified returning FCA less seats, get a low mileage lease on the 2023 Jeep Grand Cherokee L Laredo 4x4 for $3.29 a month, for $24 months, with $3,999 due its signing, tax title license extra, no security deposit required. Call 1-889-25 Jeep for details, requires dealer contribution, a lease through Ally Financial. Currently, this must end by $6,324. Extra charge for miles over $20,000. Residency restrictions apply. Take delivery by 531-23. Jeep is a registered trademark. Music Jesse, are you recording? That's fine. Alright, Jesse, are you recording? Fantastic. Hello, hello, everybody, and welcome to the Chiluminati Podcast, episode 55.

As always, I am one of your hosts, Mike Martin, joining my two best buddies and co-host, Alex. I was going to go with best co-host, but it just didn't sound right. I like best buddies. It sounded sad at the end there. It's kind of like best buddies. We're like the air buddies. We're like the air buddies more than the best buddies. We're like the three dogs that can play basketball. Oh, air buds. Yeah, all the way through. I got you. Well, the air buddies are the puppies. I never saw the air buddy one.

Oh, there's a lot of them. Let me tell you. Enough for a basketball team, at least. Yeah, air bud, and it's in space. And the crazy thing is nobody asks the questions. Nobody asks the right questions. How do these dogs get these powers? What's the deal? Why are these dogs so smart? How? How? Nobody asks how. Was that not answered in airbud one? It was a long time ago. I don't remember. I haven't seen them for a long time.

Oh my God, there's so many. Yeah, there's so many. Starting in 1997, going through to today, airbud, airbud, golden receiver, airbud, world pup. Yeah, that's what he's in the world cup. Airbud, seventh inning fetch, airbud. That's the baseball one. Airbud spikes back. He plays volleyball. Nice. Then he has children with air buddies.

By the way, between airbud one and air buddies, 10 years past. That's not the same airbud. Then he has snow buddies. Yeah, that's the bobsled one, I think. Then space buddies. They're literally just space helmets in that one. Santa buddies. We're in improv scene wacky town.

Spooky buddies. Spooky buddies. You're eight puppies who can play basketball that found themselves in space. Go. Actually, it's sixth puppies, but whatever. Then there's treasure buddies. What's that? Pirates? It looks like kind of a mix of Indiana Jones. I say it's Indiana Jones because one has an Indiana Jones hat and there's the monkey from Indiana Jones in the image.

The monkey from Indiana Jones? The cameo. The bad dates monkey? Yeah. That same monkey. Then super buddies. He's like slaps chocolate out of there. Super buddies is the last one in 2013.

Powers? They finally died. Super buddies? There's so much footage of them. I don't even know if you can, but we would consider AirBud a cryptid. I think so. If there was sightings, yeah. If people started seeing AirBud.

A dog dunking basketball hoops in the local park after midnight. Like some Russian guy filming it. Look at this. A fuzzy video of a dog doing backwards over his head. It only comes into focus when the dog's on the ground looking at him and then he has to run. Shit, he saw me. He's just running. You hear the squeak of basketball sneakers as he chases?

Jesse, what got you? Yeah, what's going on? I'm currently watching the trailer to Super Buddies. And it is just as bad as you think. Oh, they have powers. They all have different powers. And in fact, at one point, a green monkey shows up, which I think is the monkey from the previous movie. Indiana Jones monkey?

He has elf ears for some reason. He ate the bad dates and he got powers. Why are we getting powers from doing things and I still don't have mine? He didn't say bad dates. He said rad dates. Well, none of these super. Well, first off, the buddies and AirBud believe in the power of Jesus Christ alone. And unfortunately for you.

No, no, no. Jesus doesn't get away. It's got free, dude. I tried to bargain with God first. It didn't work. And then you made a small amount. And then I went to temptation round. That is what the devil is counting on.

That is what the devil is counting on. And he still failed. He still gave me nothing. It doesn't even. It's almost like you've never read anything from the Bible. That's the whole M.O. That's the whole S.I.M.O. You know why it's because you're not like a mean billionaire.

Like you need to have that extra. You need to learn that lesson. You know what I mean? Yeah, you need to at least lure some kids to their deaths first. Right. And then you're in. You need to cover up like a spill. Like, you know, you got to do something real bad.

Have any of you ever seen the movie, The Mangler? No. No. Sounds like a sex toy. There's a movie where an old man is like, I run this town. See? And you damn kids ain't going to stop me.

And when they confront him, he opens like a door to the mangler. And the mangler is like a machine that eats people. And so he's like, watch out for the mangler. The mangler. I'm not even. I don't even. You know what? Driving action of this movie.

I'm just like, no. There's a bad machine. Yes. That's pretty much it. How did they let an old man overpower them all? I mean, the old man has like traps and he's rich. This is like. Dude, you know old man's strength.

Old man's strength. Old man's strength exists. I don't buy it. I've literally. Have you not seen that Eastwood movie where he's like a hundred years old, but he's still a drug drug, like a drug cartel guy. He's driving over the lines of Mexico. What?

I'm just going to. I'm just going to say everyone. Hang on. Let me give you the name of the movie. I can't remember. Everyone needs to go look up the mangler and I'm going to send the photo of the image to these two guys and chat. I can see it.

What the fuck are you guys talking about? The mangler. There's an old man and it's based on a short story by Stephen King. That's Robert England. Dude. Dude. The cleaniest movie I'm talking about is simply called The Mule 2018. 2018.

2018. He's like a hundred years old and he's like this drug cartel driver, dude. Who's like a badass who draws the attention of like the DEA and all this stuff and so it's dumb. Yeah. After he, after he recorded his own, everybody thought I was going to say that when he started talking to the chairs when I checked out, actually, actually when I checked out was when he sang his own theme song at the end of Grand Torino.

It is the weirdest thing ever. He just, I'm going to spoil the end of the movie. He dies. He gets shot to death by like a gang to like save a bunch of like people that he like learned their culture, even though he was an old racist white man or whatever. And at the end of the movie, the car drives off and he's singing. He's like, but it's like really weird because he just died in the movie. And so it's like, it's just like his ghost singing.

It's a weird, I can't believe people like that movie so much. Don't you know what? You know, we're here for the preliminary punch. Instead, you could watch The Mangler. The Mangler we could watch. The Mangler, a movie about what is essentially like a dry cleaning press that kills people. That cannot, I cannot understand how it sustains 90 minutes of like footage. It's based off a Stephen King short story.

Of course it is. It was called like the stove. It would have the same effect on me. I'm just like probably one of those like all like, no, you know, the Mangler is one of those short stories written in his cocaine fueled haze, like where he was just banging out short story after short story in the span of like eight hours overnight. Yeah, it sounds like it. The Mangler is like probably what he was called.

The old man was just like, watch out. The man is going to get you. They're like, why is he a prosthesis? Like if it and like he's just feeding people to a machine. So why is he like Palpatine out? Why is he out now? He's an old man. Does the Mangler like give him old man powers?

No, he feeds the Mangler because he's, you know, he's like in league with the Mangler. Is there? What does the Mangler want? Does it have a evil core? Is there the movie? All right. All right. All right.

We should watch. All right. Hey, everybody. We can just say that. I want to say before we get going, hey guys, big thank you. Honestly, the Patreon has just been wonderful and it's been such a great thing for us. So if you want to go ahead and support us and go above and beyond, you can go to patreon.com slash Illuminati pod.

Throw us a couple bucks. You get some behind the scenes things. You support the show directly, allows us to keep doing this every week as we do. And you get some bonus behind the scenes footage and bonus mini-sodes as well. Today, patreon.com slash Illuminati pod. Don't miss it. You just don't, don't miss it. Just type in that website and then run away.

Don't be late. To your next date. Anyway, this is everybody, another Alex episode. We're very excited. I have no idea what you're bringing to the table. Oh yeah. We're so excited. I'm excited.

I love you guys. You guys have no idea. This is the most excited I've been since Andrew W.K. This is a big deal. Whoa. I'm excited about it. Andrew W.K. turned into a two-parter though. Oh, did it.

Well, let's go into this one. All right. All right. Look, I, I know that I've been talking big game about JFK and I promise that eventually I will do some episodes about JFK, but I, there, there's a lot of different books. I'm trying to do a different theory per episode. So there's a lot going on, but I also just think maybe like today's society has given me ADD and so I just kind of like have a bunch of notes open on my computer and I just work

on them randomly and this one is done now. So I'm doing an episode on it. You know, I just want to say I think this podcast lends itself to just diving into holes, man. There's just no end. You're just, you have infinite tabs by the end of a day of research and you somehow started looking up like, you know, something simple about science and then you ended up in the alternate dimension where time runs backwards and you don't know how. Yeah.

Yeah. No, I look, I, this is, that is exactly what happened here. This is exactly that. This is like one of those things where the deeper you go, the more shit, like just a shit tornado of nonsense just swirls around this, this thing that happened. And it, I don't even understand. It's like the Tiger King almost by the end. Like it's so fucking weird and crazy, but I'm going to get into it.

Also, real quick side note, I was going to do this haunted house episode today instead, but the LA library was out of a digital edition of a haunted housebook. What? What? It was on loan to somebody else. But it's digital. Just in case you were wondering whether copyright laws are weird as fuck or not, they are. Yeah.

So I had to wait for, I finally got it yesterday, but it was too late. So instead we're going to do this. So last week when we were talking about Art Bell on the podcast briefly, it got me thinking again about one of his most classic like quote unquote guests on his show. This wasn't really a guest, but Art Bell is involved. And when I Googled it and found an awesome new oral history article about this on Thrillist, I knew that it was finally time to talk about John Teeter on Chaluminati. I'm ready for this.

I'm ready. I actually know John Teeter. I've actually researched and followed this. I love this. This is great. I also said the name is vaguely familiar to me and I don't know why. Well, you might. Yeah.

You might know it as Tytor. Some people call him John Tytor. Or Ttor. Ttor. Yeah. But I think it's Ttor and I've always said Teeter, so I'm going to just keep going with Teeter. But I also want to, before I get into this, I want to shout out to Daniel Fischel and Evan

Lockhart, who are the two guys who compiled the quotes that I like the majority. I, you know, Alex episodes aren't Alex episodes. Yeah. And yeah. So I just do it. I know why I know this name now. I was like, I was flying home from a convention or something and on the way home, I was in this whole about this guy and I just was like ripping apart.

Yeah, I'm ready. This is awesome. Yeah. This is going to get, this is going to get crazy. But honestly, this article on Thrills, it's probably the best one out there. I have the link for it in the notes and it had a bunch of stuff that I hadn't heard about before. Like, yes, there's like a crazy mystery at the center of this, but the world around this

mystery is just as crazy as the mystery itself. And we'll eventually get to that stuff. But first, let's get into the basics. You guys have heard about him a little bit, but I'm just going to start from the beginning just because I feel like, I feel like if you're a listener of the show, you need to get like the bread and butter down because this guy is like as, to me, as, as, as important as the Mothman or Slender Man or any of those characters who are like very big parts of like modern American culture.

I feel like John Teeter is in there. Also, he's a major character in Steins Gate. I don't know if you know what that is. Yeah. The anime adventure point and click adventure puzzle game. Yeah. It's super weird that he's in it. It's very weird.

Check it out. Even though this really kind of started on coast to coast, which is a radio show if you don't know. But this guy, I feel like is one of the very first like Internet rabbit holes things that there was. It's like Mario one creepypasta. Yeah. Yeah.

I can see that. This is early on in the Internet's like lifespan. Yeah. Oh, the modern Internet. Let's say. You know what I mean? Like the way the Internet is now, like I feel like John Teeter was the first thing. And actually there is another crazy like event slash living urban legend thing that happened

that people point to as the very first thing like this. But that is going to be another episode. But I mentioned it now because we're going to touch directly on it. I'll be it extremely lightly a little bit later in the show. But let's get to it anyway. Once upon a time on November 2, 2000, there was a guy on a forum called John Teeter. But unlike most people on the Internet, not saying there are not others. He swore up and down that he was from some type of time travel organization that was

located in the near future. He said that he was here to pick up an old computer that he needed because he was on a mission from a from an organic like from a government agency to pick up this old computer. And for some reason, even though it kind of seems like the exact type of thing that you wouldn't be allowed to do if you had his job, right? He was very he became very popular because he often would go into depth about like the very juiciest types of things that you would want to ask a time traveler like the specifics of the time travel technology that he uses or the classified details of his secret mission.

And probably the most exciting part of all to most people probably who are reading this is for warning people of future events that were going to occur, right? And obviously from the team Jesse side of our mission, their ship, I can already hear brain vaults slamming shut and locking closed from the possibility of this being time travel. But he does break the golden rule, right? Like do not interact with those in the past, lest you create a ripple effect that, you know, you end up in this timeline. You end up fucking your own grandma accidentally.

And that's what happens when you mess with my yes, yes, yes, yes for sure. That's like time travel 101. But in the world of John Teter, in the lore of John Teter, there is a very good reason why he is able to do well. I don't know what it is, but my theory, it just is knowing what I know about things. I don't confirm yes or no, but it'd be less of a time travel thing and more of a parallel world thing would be my guess. But we'll see.

Yes, yes. Yes. You're on the right track there. Obviously time travel, like it's a big pill to swallow, right? Things that you need to consider about time travel, right? Due to the nature of it, it would be almost impossible to verify something like this, right? I've thought about that a lot.

Would we even know, you know, that's the thing you got to think about with time travel. It's like, even if it is real, even if it's real now, people are like, where are the time travelers? Why aren't they just coming to our meetings that we set? It's a very complicated thing. Time travel. And if it is real, like, unfortunately, just like everything else, aliens and cryptids and all that shit, the the the very experience that you would have if it was real, unless

you were there experiencing the actual time travel is an experience of experiencing nothing. So it's tough. But as time went on and certain things happened in our timeline, people would either become more and more convinced he was real or peace out from the whole thing and write him off as like a fake every time something that he said turned out differently than he predicted. But before I tell you what I think, let's take a closer look at how stuff went down exactly. And then you guys can be the judge yourself. Is that cool?

I'm ready. Yeah. I mean, of course, it's cool. I'm the fucking guy. Is that? Yeah. Anyway, I said July, I said November 2, 2000 was when he appeared on the Internet. But the actual first appearance of John Teeter was on July 29, 1998, back when people still

actually use these things, Art Bell read a fax from a listener of his legendary paranormal radio show Coast to Coast AM. And here is a quote about that episode of Coast to Coast from a quote unquote researcher and hosts hunter that I found on the Internet, who is embroiled in this whole thing, whose name is John Razimus. And you can look him up later. Listeners. There's no point yet because I'll tell you how he figures into this.

You can look him up later. He said, I was a huge Art Bell fan in the 90s. He would have the time traveler open lines night where anyone could phone in with stories. And I actually heard the very first incarnation of John Teeter live when Art read the faxes in 1998. I didn't have internet access for the next few years, so I missed the rest of it. But this was like a he was like, all right, it's a time travel show. Everybody can call in anybody can send in whatever they want.

Here's the facts that we got. That's what this was. Hell yeah. And so I edited down the facts a little bit because it's a pretty long thing. But just to get some of the specifics in there, I edited it down. So I'm going to read that to you right now. Dear Art, I had the facts when I heard other time travelers calling in from any time past the year 2500 AD.

Please let me explain. Time travel was invented in 2034. Offshoots of certain successful fusion reactor research allowed scientists at CERN to produce the world's first contained singularity engine. The basic design involves rotating singularities inside a magnetic field. By altering the speed and direction of rotation, you can travel both forward and backward in time. Time itself can be understood in terms of connected lines.

When you go back in time, you travel on your original timeline. So pause. This is like, if I time travel, I can go to like, it will always be Earth 616. My Earth. Use that Marvel term, baby. I'm ready. Yeah. But when you turn the singularity engine off, a new timeline is created, and that's a new

diversion point due to the fact that you and your time machine are now there. Yep. That makes sense because you immediately change history. So you rewind and place yourself wherever you want in history, and then you go from there and immediately it's new. Yeah. So you can fuck with it in that way because it's a new timeline. It doesn't matter to you.

You're not, I mean, it's probably immoral, but you're not doing anything to your timeline. Your prime timeline. Yeah. But you can get... Like any organism. Oh. How? Okay.

I'm thinking like video game, like, okay, so how do you get back to your timeline? So you then have to rewind again, and then fast forward on the main timeline? Like... It'll make sense in a second, but yeah, it sucks. You basically, the truth is you can't do it all the time. You can't. There's always some time. It's a fun thought experiment.

No, no, no. The facts goes on. Some interesting outcomes of this are, one, you meet yourself. I have done it often, even taken a younger version of myself along for a few rides before returning myself to the new timeline and going back to mine. Two, you can alter history in the new universe that you have just created. Most of the time, the changes are subtle. Sometimes I'll notice car models that don't exist or books that come out late.

But fortunately, it was also discovered that anyone going forward in time from my 2036 hit a brick wall in the year 2564. Please pray that we discover the reason why there is no apparent future after 2564. So that's the basic message, but he also starts talking about all these crazy, apocalyptic things, political upheavals, natural disasters, all that kind of stuff. But in real time, as the show is happening, as Art Bell was reading the facts, I guess he heard his facts being read on the air. And then he sent another one through the facts, as the show was being recorded live, which

Art also read as a follow-up. So here's a little bit of that one. Dear Mr. Bell, I'm glad you're back. I faxed this information to you the day before you left the air. I wanted to make sure it wasn't lost in the shuffle, so I am sending a gift. As I said, then I am a time traveler. I have been on this world line since April of this year, and I plan to leave soon. Typically, time travelers do not purposely affect the world lines they visit.

However, this mission is unusually long, and I've grown attached to some of the people I've met here, okay? So this is where the legend of John Teter started, right? I like it. On this fax radio show. Such a good start. This is like the tip of it. I know.

I know. I love this shit. Nothing really important to the narrative happened for two and a half years after that, which is why I say that maybe without the internet, this is something that wouldn't have ever become as big as it was. It would have just been one of those episodes that two people who watch Art Bell maybe talk about every once in a while, like, hey, remember that weird time traveler guy? But it really became something more than that.

Because like I mentioned at the beginning of the episode on November 2, 2000, Post began appearing from a user called Time Traveler Zero on the forums for the Time Travel Institute, which I guess at one point was like actually a real forum where people would meet to talk seriously about the concept of time travel. And along with a lot of the same info that was read in the faxes a few years before, there was a lot of stuff like this. Greetings. I am a Time Traveler from the year 2036.

I am on my way home after getting an IBM 5100 computer system from the year 1975. My time machine is a stationary mass temporal displacement unit manufactured by General Electric. The unit is powered by two topspin dual positive singularities that produce a standard offset tippler sinusoid. I will be happy to post pictures of the unit. So by January, that's like in like a span of two months, we start seeing the name John Teter.

We should be alive at that point still, dudes. What do you mean? 2036. That's only like... Yeah. Fingers crossed. Right? You think Shlumanati's big in 2036 on his timeline?

I would love it if we could be future Arpels. That would be the greatest. Right? That would be the greatest adventure. That would be the greatest adventure. Shlumanati into the new secret shadow government of the world. I'm fine with that too. And chill everybody the fuck out.

Here, go ahead and throw me an email, man. ShlumanatiPod at gmail.com. Let us know. Well, we can't spoil things yet. Don't... Well, no. It's on his timeline. Actually, be careful what you wish for.

Yeah. Yeah. Okay. So we start seeing the name John Teter pop up in January of 2001. And we see a mirror post to the original November post pop up on the coast to coast art bell forums, which is why he's always tied to art bell, no matter what, because most of the posting really went on on the coast to coast forums. And for two full months, they got regular posts from someone everyone was now confidently

calling John Teter, okay? According to him, like he said in a lot of the messages, he came from the year 2036. From 2036, he traveled back in time along his own timeline to 1975, where he had some business involving a computer. And then he jumped forward 25 years on his way back home, part of the way back to his own timeline to the year 2000. And then he spent several years in that timeline. And then, and he says that's for, quote, personal reasons, while he waited for a, quote, favorable

window to jump the 35 more years back to 2036. That's interesting to me because like, if he's stopping for years at a time, he's not immortal. He's still a human. So now he's just living years of his life in random timelines. That's got to be traumatic in a lot of ways. If you think about an astronaut, right? Like they sit up in space and it's like fucked up.

Right. But when you return to your timeline, you're now many, many years older. So the question is, do you... Yeah, it's very comic books. Yeah. So do you jump to a timeline where you're appropriately aged now? I wouldn't. But I mean, if he's a government, if he's working government, I'm saying like, take

this from a government perspective. You go, you're, you're, do you, for the sake of cover, you consider sending him back in time a five to 10 year mission, assuming that he only has certain times he can jump so that he comes back at a time where his age and body is appropriate. Because I imagine... If he had no earthly connections, I would be down with that. But like, if he has a family, I would be like, he has to come back 10 minutes after he left. Yeah.

That's what I was saying. Yeah. Well, he probably doesn't. He doesn't imagine missions to like places outside the solar system or even missions to Mars. Yeah. Like the, the time difference that I imagine, imagine you're the first group of people going anywhere.

Yeah. Anybody's going to Mars, have a funeral for them. Yeah. Yeah. They're not coming back. And I imagine it's the same way. It was with time travel. Yeah.

Imagine the first people who, if we ever discover a real way to do it, it'd be like, all right. Good luck. Like we may not see you again. You might be able to video chat in like 50 years. It's like the, it's like interstellar. Like the person, people come back and they're 85 and they're like, yeah, I had a great life. I did a crazy thing and like, you know. Exactly.

Exactly. But also, yeah. So according to him, the reason that he has to be in the timeline for so long is because he has some personal things to tend to. There's maybe a mission parameter in the year 2000 and he had to wait for a favorable window to jump back. There's not really a consensus about what exactly his personal reasons were. But as you may have already noticed, it was sometimes heavily implied by Teter himself

that it had something to do with an event that went down on what he calls a world line, which what we're describing, I think is these like divergent timelines. But here's what he says about it. He says, although I do have personal reasons for being here and speaking with you. The most I could hope for is that you recognize the possibility of time travel as a reality. You are able to change your world line for better or worse, just as I am. So what he's saying is he might be coming back to our timeline to change something for some reason, but you don't have to be a time traveler to change the course of history,

which is inspiring. You know what I mean? Yeah. And that's this. That's the weird thing about this is that like for some people, John Teter is like a hero. You know what I mean? It's like a war hero, basically.

He's like an American hero who's like saved us from things. You know what I mean? Even though we have no idea what he was doing out here and it could be as mundane as like collecting a file. No. Yeah. Exactly. Well, I mean, I think the main thing that everybody thinks has to do with Y2K.

Oh, the Y2K bug that was supposed to hit the computers. Yeah. I think that's I think that's like what most people think. But he predicted a lot of things. So let's just let's just get into them. One of the main things that John Teter post would always focus on was like being prepared and being brave, right? He always liked those like those words about changing history.

He's always trying to be inspiring to people and he would always warn people they were too soft, too complacent, dangerous around every corner all the time. It's like, you know, he's like talking from this perspective of 40 years down the line from the year 2000, he's like, you guys need to like fight for what you believe in or the world is going to eat you alive. At that time, near the end of the 90s, the big scare on everybody's mind, Y2K, which if you don't know what that is, it has to do with the fact that computers were programmed a certain way so that when the date line switches over from 99 to 00, it like fucks everything

up. And people were predicting like airplanes falling out of the sky, technology going haywire, going back to the Stone Age, all this crazy shit. Nothing really happened. But you know, for clarity's sake, it's they just didn't put 1999. Everything was like 98, 99. And so it reset to 1900 and everyone was terrified like the world was going to end. It was real fear.

Like I remember people panic buying like it was a real thing people worried about if you're like a younger person, you don't remember that it was really a weird thing. One of the guys I used to teach with bought a house that was built on top of a multi-level bunker because the dude thought the world was going to end in the year 2000. So he has a normal house and then underneath it is a three story bunker. Like he has a six story house technically like that's it's crazy. Man, remember back in our naive days when the year 2000 was when the world was going to end.

Yeah. And then 2012. Remember those good old. I do. My prediction. God. All right. Okay.

So whether or not we actually experienced any disaster on this timeline or a previous one we may have all been on before he came in and maybe ended Y2K for us. One of the first big things people used to talk about was the fact that when John Teter went to 1975, he was able to do something that prevented Y2K from ending the world the way it was supposed to be. And he actually touched on that topic a little bit in February of 2001. He said, would I be any more believable if I told you I had just stopped a horrible event and you won't hear about it because it didn't happen?

I don't want the responsibility of being expected to know who lives and who dies. I know it would change me for the worse. Besides, how can you be sure my inaction now isn't a result of something I've already screwed up and I'm trying to fix it? The example of not preventing Pearl Harbor relates to Y2K. Have you considered that I might already have accidentally screwed up your world line? Like maybe stopping Y2K was something that he did for his own means and that our timeline is fucked up now.

You know what I mean? It's another interesting thing because you think of that in a more personal and I go to therapy every week and one of the things I talk with my therapist about is like, if you could go back to your younger self, would you do anything? Would you say something to him to make him either feel better or change anything? And that's such a hard question because I'm like, but if I did, I wouldn't be where I am now and I'm happy now and it required me going through a lot of hell to kind of get here.

So yeah. And that's the same theory applies to time traveling and timelines. It's interesting. And the world. Yeah. And the whole world. Macro sense and a micro sense. So it's interesting because like, how do you send time travelers on missions when you

don't know what the end result to the timeline is going to be? And the answer is you just can't care about that other world anymore. You just don't care about the other dimension because you don't know for sure if it's real. It doesn't matter. But also some of the stuff that he said sometimes got off base. He said, the civil war in the United States will start in 2004. I would describe it as having a Waco type event every month that steadily gets worse. The conflict will consume everyone in the U.S. by 2012 and ended 2015 with a very short

World War three. Yep. That's what wildly offer this timeline. At least unless he was off by a couple years. Now that could be him being wrong or it could be explained by his future being a little different than ours now that he stopped Y2K or whatever you want to believe. And either way, every single post was just this with like a huge AMA afterward. Like he would just say some crazy shit and people would be like, what the fuck are you

talking about? Like all the way down. And it's actually awesome because the article that I would that I've been getting these quotes from the Thrillist article, they actually got quotes from the forum of other people like talking to him. It's pretty good. So people would like go in on him. There's this chick, Charlotte, from the Art Bell Forum from February 6th.

She said, please list the price of gold for the last 20 of your years and I can tell you the condition of the stock market in the future. Will it still be fairly lawful for me to own and use handguns? When are beginning your time travel adventures? Is it possible for you to bump into yourself and you are time traveling? Saw a John Claude Van Damme movie about that once. I think it was called Time Cop. Whatever you do, don't shake hands with yourself.

If you do, you melt. But on the other end of the spectrum, one guy, Mike said, ho hum, another time traveler. Well, time to run him through the BSO meter. So there was a lot of different attitudes about him at the time. You know what I mean? I mean, it is fairly easy. Like if he's saying the timeline we're on is what is kind of his original timeline up to the point where he's changing it.

He could easily like, okay, here's the 20 years of gold pricing and you could. I mean, it would be so easy to just look up our own history and lie about it. Yeah, exactly. Another one of the big things that you would mention, though, besides Y2K was a giant outbreak of something called Kreuzfeld-Jakob disease or Kreuzfeld-Jakob disease. Probably a medical professional is laughing at me, but it's called CJD, a mad cow like brain disorder which claimed the lives of hundreds of thousands across the world. I don't know if it's real.

I don't know if it's a made up thing that he made up, but it's a thing that he said would happen. And he said something that was like a little creepy considering what's going on today. He said, I get no pleasure out of being right when it comes to CJD disease, war in the Middle East or suffering people in faraway lands. There's nothing like the look on someone's face when you tell them 100,000 people will be dead tomorrow. So it's interesting to add, like if you're in this situation, you're a time traveler,

isn't it interesting that you wouldn't actually be able to predict the future? Yeah, yeah, because the minute you change the timeline, you don't know what's going to happen anymore. Yeah, it's like you could say whatever you want, you could say the craziest shit ever. And even though, I mean, it's frustrating, it's the same thing as Bigfoot being on a blurry camera every time. Yeah, exactly. It's literally...

Yeah, but it's also legit like a scientific theory. This is probably the most likely, if there is many worlds, this is probably the most likely situation that could come from time traveling. I don't think you could ever get back the way that he describes. Yeah, I'm curious what he says because it's almost like I could see in a very dystopian capitalistic world, time travel is invented, you pay a maximum price for a reset and you get to just go live out in a different timeline. Yeah, I just don't know.

I don't know the specifics of it, but it's like the problem is this checks out with science, even though it's almost certainly fake. But let's talk about the time machine itself a little bit. Yeah, let's. Just for a little bit. Because none of these facts matter at all if the science doesn't add up. You know what I mean? So according to Teeter, time travel was discovered in 2034, just two years before he left and

was based on the work of an actual time travel related mathematician from our world and he's a physics genius too. His name is Frank Tipler, who you may know as the Tipler behind the Tipler cylinder, which he recognized as allowing closed time like curvers. Don't know what those are in 1974, even though the cylinder itself was discovered earlier by somebody called Willem Jacob von Stockham and Korn Zos don't know what that means. In 1946. Yeah, definitely a demon of some sort, the elder God of maze to Korn Zos two different

scientists just discovered the basis of this, but the Tipler cylinder like application and why it's called the Tipler cylinder happened in 1974 by Frank Tipler. I'm not going to go too far into the specifics of it because it is extremely hard to understand and I would have to like really break it down and I was like, you lie five, you lie five quantum mechanics for me, sir. It would just be very boring for me to do and to explain it succinctly wouldn't be meaningful. But it is a real thing you can look up and read verifiable sources about. So you're just going to have to take my word.

But here's a quote that Thrillist pulled from Frank Tipler from an interview that he did in Omni Mag in October of 1994, which at the time of John Teter was only like five or six years old. He said, I don't think I'm a crackpot. But no crackpot thinks he is right. An astronomer once published a list of the rules for determining a crackpot. Well, if you read Darwin's origin of the species, you'll find he was a crackpot by some of the criteria.

I'm very conservative scientifically. I'm just changing the boundary conditions and cosmology from the beginning of time to the end of time. I accept all known physical laws and just change the point of view. Emanuel Kant claimed that the three fundamental problems of metaphysics are does God exist? Do we have free will and is their life after death? I turn those questions of metaphysics into problems of physics and solve them answering. Yes, yes, yes.

The history of science is typically about turning insoluble problems of metaphysics into problems of physics and solving them like one of Kant's problems. Has the universe existed forever or only a finite time? Kant thought this was fundamentally insoluble too and had a purported proof of this. But in this century, we've turned this supposedly insoluble metaphysical problem into one of physics and solved it to find the universe is 10 to 20 billion years old. I'm just taking the next step. My reductionist belief is that a problem that can be solved can be solved by physics and

only by physics. That's some real Reed Richards Tony Stark shit right there. That's Frank Tipler. So he's a pretty interesting guy and he does sound like the guy who invented time travel. Like he talks the talk for sure. According to Teeter, the time travel application of this technology is created after a breakthrough at CERN using their particle accelerator. I was going to say which in and of itself is a topic that might even deserve its own

episode because with CERN and the Hedron Collider comes the question of did the world end in 2013, 2012 ish with a microscopic black hole and we're simply living out the final years of our universe and is fucking nuts. Yeah, it's fucking insane picture evidence of like things that are in like it's supposed to be in a spot in New York and then aren't there but they're like weirdly blurry. It's so weird. It's so weird. Yeah.

Are you? What are you on? Oh, you know, you've never seen this stuff. Dude. Okay. We're about to detour for me. You know the Hedron Collider. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. That thing. Yeah. That thing. Everybody remember everybody was going crazy about it like just being dangerous because it's like. Yeah.

And then it wasn't dangerous and everything was fine. It's essentially super science. Well, the danger. I mean, the danger was real, right? Like the danger. The thing that could have happened was like them talking about it, right? Which was to create a mini black hole that could eat the whole universe by accident. Right.

But it didn't. So we're good. Uh, maybe it did. Maybe it didn't. It has. It all has to do with our perception of time, which is why it's frustrating. Well, here's the thing. Uh, if we, if it was created on this planet, a mini black hole is created on this planet.

We are so close to it that we would have already been like, like, many black holes don't operate and like it's tiny. So it takes longer. It's not like that. It's not like that. It's just imagine how quick it actually would happen. Okay. Imagine how quick it actually would happen, right?

And then imagine that you didn't even notice that it happened. But because of the way our brains perceive time, we're just on the stretching timeline that's spiraling into a black hole and have been for, for the last seven years, except we're just like a, like a shit streak on the side of the black hole. Yeah. It's fucked up. It's fucked up. We are traveling back and forth in space.

It's inconceivable. There's no way. It's an impossibility. It's inconceivable. I'm just listening right now. Shoot these two down. Send the messages that are like, you're so wrong. I'm invincible.

Okay. I'm like Boris from GoldenEye. No scientists will prove me wrong until you get frozen and you break each other. Please. I'm just being silly scientists. Please do not waste time trying to tell me that. Yeah. No, we know we're not scientists.

Don't worry. I understand how crazy I'm sound. Mathis is jumping on like, yeah. No, we're done. Please. I'm not a scientist. It's cool to think about though. Please.

Anyway, by 2034, this was ubiquitous technology. Teter had a model from General Electric that he installed and used from inside of a 1967 Corvette. I hate that element of this story because it makes it seem so bullshit-y. But here's what he says about the time machine. The means by which I travel in time is very physical. I require a machine to do it. It weighs about 500 pounds and gets quite hot.

I do not own it and I did not build it. Within limits, I will be happy to discuss how it works and how future science thinks time works by using two microsingularities in close proximity to each other. It is possible to create, manipulate, and alter the Kerr fields to create a tippler gravity sinusoid. Sinusoid. I don't know how to pronounce that word. This field can be adjusted, rotated and moved in order to simulate the movement of mass

through a donut-shaped singularity and into an alternate world line, thus safe time travel. He includes diagrams and things like that, which people could clearly see were drawn up by someone with knowledge of engineering, the physics, but nobody could look at it and figure out how it could possibly function. But according to the Thrillist article, and this isn't completely related, but I think it's fucking insane anyway because what isn't about this story? There was a man called Marlon Pullman who applied for patents on these diagrams in 2004. And here's a quote about him, about it from him that happened in 2006.

I have a degree in physics and engineering and back engineered this based on John Teeter's post. I work for a large software company and have no profit motive. I just want one and didn't have the means to build it. And then in 2013, here's another quote from him that gave a little bit more insight that said, I patented the time machine because I had to do something while I was going through chemo for Hodgkin's lymphoma about 2002. I had nothing better to do.

I think I made a mathematical error. However, that's probably the last we're going to hear from that guy in a while because the last part of that interview came from when he was on trial in 2013 for the drugging of four women with, quote, LSD, ecstasy, and nitrous oxide, which he mixed into spring-loaded syringes and injected into his victims in their neck before having his way with them. That is a real thing that happened. Fuck that guy. What a piece of shit.

I tried to patent John Teeter's time machine. Is that not insane? That's nuts. He pled guilty and he was sentenced to 75 months in prison, which he is still serving. And now that we kind of have an idea of how John Teeter got here, at least conceptually maybe in a light way, let's get a little closer look at why he came, the mission. According to Teeter himself, his original purpose in traveling back to 1975 was to grab a computer that was almost impossible to come by in his time of 2036, which is a computer

called the IBM 5100. It is a 55 pound computer. It was built in 1975, five inch CRT monitor on the unit, and it was one of the very first portable computers ever built. And obviously portable here is a relative term, but it's a unit that's not like a room. You know what I mean? It's like the grandpa of what we currently think of as computers, as opposed to agents of SHIELD, agent Carter, ticker tape computers or whatever.

According to Oliver Williams, who was interviewed as a John Teeter archivist in 2012 by a guy called Kevin Moore. He will talk about more later. It was all part of a military operation that Teeter was a part of, complete with a Star Trek looking insignia and the actual computer unit, like the specific one that he needed apparently was located in Rochester, Minnesota. And here's a link to the insignia of John Teeter's time travel thing, if you guys want to see it.

I dropped it into the chat for you guys. You can check it out on his Wikipedia page. It looks like Star Trek or something. But people did not buy this. People were not into this idea that he went to get this computer because going back to 1975, the year that the computer is launched seems like a dumb way to get the computer. This guy, Charles M, elaborated on the forum. He said, why would you want an IBM 1500?

I can find them at auctions for next to nothing. I think they were the first 286 CPUs. Why didn't you stop this? Why didn't you stop in this year and buy one? We have a good, well, I have a good question for you in 2036. Do you still use toilet paper to wipe your ass? That was a great question. That is an awesome question.

What about the three C cells? All the comments are like presented with their normal grammar, like their actual grammar from the people who wrote them. So I apologize for stumbling through them sometimes. That's a good question though. I mean, he could easily stop at any point in time and just gotten them. Yeah, but here's the thing. He actually responded to that.

He said, the 5100 had a very simple and unique feature that IBM did not account for and decided it was not in their best interest to advertise, which in hindsight was not very smart. This accidental feature was thus removed from any future desktop computers. In order to take advantage of this feature, the 5100 I have now required a couple of special tweaks that had to be done by the software engineers who actually made the computer in 1975. Anyone who is familiar with this feature and was told to keep their mouth shut about it will be able to tell you what it is.

Yes, we still have toilet tissue and some people still suffer from extreme anal fixation. Yeah, he like roasted that guy. Hell yeah. He didn't toast it. What is that feature though? So according to Oliver Williams, quote, there was some special trick or technical issue inside this computer that allowed it to speak basic APL and some system language. Some IBM engineers came forward and said, I don't know if that guy was a time traveler

or not. This is a quote. I don't know if that guy was a time traveler or not, but everything he said about that machine is true. And maybe only 20 people knew about that computer's true functions. So how about that? So how about that? That's cool though.

That's fucking cool. It's so wild. John Teeter's last official post of the original Burst of Posts came on March 24th, 2001. And even though it definitely would not be the last we'd hear from John Teeter, it has a nice finality to it. And so to close out this surprise, part one of two John Teeter episodes, I'm going to read it in its entirety for you right now because I think it's kind of boy. Oh boy.

Dude, you have no fucking idea. I will be leaving this world line shortly and this will be my final post. There are only a handful of people who will know exactly when I will be leaving and I'm sure they will let you know when I'm gone. In the last few days, I have found your choice of topics quite interesting. And from an objective viewpoint, I think it collectively answers one of your own questions. If time travel is real, where are all the time travelers? In the past, I have stated that quite frankly, you all scare the hell out of me with a capital

H and I'm sure other temporal drivers would feel the same. But now I have an expanded explanation with two examples. A while ago on one of the posts, I related an experience I had with my parents while we were driving down a highway. Every now and then, we would pass someone who was in obvious distress in their vehicle. I was amazed that so many people could pass them by without stopping to help. Their explanation was fear. The risk of helping someone was too great and with today's technology, they probably

had a cell phone anyway. If they didn't, the walk to a gas station would be good for them and teach them a lesson for running out of gas. The other example is the plight of the homeless. When you pass them as individuals on the street, I see the way people selectively choose an alternate path to avoid them. Those two examples best define why time travelers do not show themselves. In trying to help you, we put ourselves at great risk and there's really no point to

it. We know the nature of time dictates that traveling between exact world lines is impossible. Therefore, the only results we will see will be the ones we stay to see. Since world lines, outcomes, and events are infinite, we have better things to do. When I arrive in the new 1998 world line on my way home, I could easily start all of this again and continue to go through the same conversations with all of the same people. However, I already know you won't pay any attention or believe me because we've already been through this on this world line.

Besides, I think the walk to the gas station will do you some good. My parting thought revolves around something JC had been harping on since day one. No, I do not have a secret agenda, but I have been paying a great deal of attention to your world line. My interaction with you was not a direct mission parameter, but it was a secondary mission protocol based on standing orders given to all temporal drivers. That secondary objective is basically to gather as much information about a world line based on a set of observable variables when we first arrive.

Your world line met those conditions. What amazes me is why no one here wonders why Y2K didn't hit them at all. Bring a gas can with you when the car dies on the side of the road. Farewell. It's interesting. John Teter part one ends. It's interesting. I'm curious what the realistic explanations people have for John Teter are when we get

to the end of this. This. Okay, so part one is all set in a fantasy world where there's a time traveler named Don Teter. Of course. Part two is the Tiger King, and you're going to learn how this whole house of cards comes crashing down and maybe still is standing at the same time somehow, impossibly, impossibly. So I'm so disappointed that we didn't like you don't listen.

It's about to go from like time travel story. No, I understand. I'm disappointed that this show is not longer for this specific purpose. It's I mean, we're doing a whole other episode. I know. I know. It's just this is crazy. This is crazy.

You have no clue. You have no clue what's about to happen. Tell me that the very least that the idea that like aliens come in at some point. Uh, no. How do I? How do I break this to you? No. Is the answer?

No is the answer. Of course it's the answer. Why would it be the answer? Yeah, but another another scary, scary unearthly creature does big foot. No. No. But I'm not going to spoil it. I'm not going to spoil it.

No, no. Yeah, that'll be that'll be in a few days, actually, because we'll be back on Sunday to wrap this this little thing up and put us right back on schedule. I figured it'd be fun to do a surprise one because you guys are going to get both of them like pop pop. Yeah, you're going to you're going to get him within literally two or three days of each other. So Alex, as always, appreciate the wild ride you bring us on.

I am excited for the next part. Like the things you talked about on this one, I knew like a little about like I knew about the computer, but I didn't know the reason that he gave. So it's interesting. I'm excited. Dude, it is. It is so good. And I wouldn't be able to do this each and every week if it wasn't for you guys out

there. I was going to throw you something at patreon.com slash shilluminati pod donating your money and your time to support our fine show. Thank you so much. And if you guys want more of us talking right now, just at this very moment, head over to patreon.com slash shilluminati pod. And we will read for you 15 to 60 minutes of more paranormal nonsense. So it's true.

Peace out, friends. And see you next time. Thanks for watching. If you want to reach out to us as always, you can hit us up on Twitter, Mathis Games for myself, Jesse Cox for Jesse fussy on a for Alex. And of course, shilluminati pod for the podcast itself, subreddit by the same name R slash shilluminati pod. We had a dope submission of like animation and some music and stuff over there in the

past few days. Then really, really cool. To the chill wave synthwave. Yeah. Power failure. He came. I have that on board. I could play us out with that if you want.

Um, yeah, that's it's a great song. Go check out power failure. He did a little synthwave redo of our theme song and he has a great bunch of songs over on his SoundCloud. I love that. Yeah. It's great. Thanks for listening, everybody.

We'll be back in just a few days. Goodbye. Nice. Anyway, me and my wife were sitting outside indulging on our porch one night enjoying ourselves. I needed to go to the bathroom so I stepped back inside and after a few moments I hear my wife go, holy shit, get out here. So I quickly dash back outside and she's looking up at the sky in the fall.

I look up too and there's a perfect line of dozen lights traveling across the sky.