Chilluminati Podcast - Episode 56 - John Titor Part 2

Episode Date: June 23, 2020

Patreon - http://www.patreon.com/chilluminatipod Thrillist Article: https://www.thrillist.com/entertainment/nation/john-titor-time-traveler-predictions-story BUY OUR MERCH - http://theyetee.com/collections/chilluminati Soundcloud - @chilluminatipodcast Jesse Cox - http://www.youtube.com/jessecox Alex Faciane - http://www.youtube.com/user/ThatOneLaserClown Art Commissioned by - http://www.mollyheadycarroll.com Theme - Matt Proft End song - POWER FAILURE - https://soundcloud.com/powerfailure Video - http://www.twitter.com/digitalmuppet

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Rev it up at Toyota.com. Toyota, let's go places. Music Great. Hello, hello, hello everybody and welcome back to the Chaluminati podcast, episode 56. As always, I am one of your hosts, like Martin joined by Alex Fasiana and Jesse Cox. Hi. What's up boys? I, look, enough intros. Let's get to this story.

John Titor. I mean, John, John Titor part two, you left us with such a cliffhanger. The, there was no, uh, cause you, you alluded that this episode is you're going to kind of rip everything you built down. You kind of built us a nice castle and now you're going to break it apart. I told you the story. I told you the legend of John Titor, like the part that like when you see like a fluff piece on this in like some sort of magazine, that's the part that you got last time. Yeah.

Just magazine. Yeah. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? Oh yeah. Go ahead. Please take it. I'm just saying today we're going like the complete other side of the coin.

Like we're looking at the weird world around John Titor and the monsters that he's created out there in the American. He's creating monsters. Internet scape. You'll see, you'll see what I'm saying. I'm nervous. I purposely did not dive any deeper because everything you said I mostly knew and you gave me some new details that I had no idea about. So do you guys want to discuss the air buddies some more? I don't know.

Okay. Before we get there is a clarification. I think we're good. The disease that you talked about in the last episode, I got endless tweets, endless tweets about how mad cow disease is a very real thing, which we already knew and that the disease you talked about is just a version of mad cow disease. I guess. What I was saying was that I don't know if it's possible that that type of disease can become a global pandemic. That's the only thing that I was explaining.

I obviously know what mad cow disease is and that disease is sort of like the thing that mad cow disease puts in your brain when you eat disease. Well, also we got messages. Was it was it this episode or was it the the the Patreon episode where I discovered that you two both believe that the world is a black hole? That was the last episode because we're talking about CERN and the hatred collider. We're talking about CERN and you're both crazy people. I'm glad that real scientists were like, no. No, honestly, I am too because now that existential dread is long gone and I don't have to worry about it anymore. You literally could have Googled.

You literally could have Googled what a science thing. Because there's so many conspiracy things that pop up. What do you mean? Here's the thing. I'm an anthropologist. You know what I'm saying? I'm a culture anthropologist. What I'm trying to do is I'm trying to lay out the story as I heard it.

Do you know what I'm saying? I'm trying to preserve the kooky American folkloreity of these weird stories. Also, if it wasn't apparent, we're not scientists, everybody. We're here to tell you cool stories. And obviously, you should not come to us looking for facts. Speaking of Patreon, though, thank everybody for supporting us over there. After today, there's going to be six exclusive minisodes on the Patreon. On top of the compilations are already out.

This is going to be the sixth one that's going to be just exclusive to Patreon. We're due for a minisode compilation already, but your support has gone such a long way. We have over 800 patrons over there now, which is freaking awesome. We're marching towards a thousand, which would be wild. If you guys love the show and you want to support us directly, head over there. Throw us a few bucks. You get some cool behind the scenes stuff, and it helps us continue this thing every week. Join the Chalumarmy at Patreon.

Chalumarmy. Chalumarmy. Hey, little Chalminis. How you doing? Chalumarmy. Join them at patreon.com. Chalumarmy. Chalumarmy.

Chalumarmy. Chalumarmy. Sounds terrible. Chalumarmy. That is straight out of 2011. Straight out of 2011 YouTube personality, dude. I don't want a Chalumarmy. Chalumabuddies.

Chalumabuddies. Chalumabuddies. What about Chalumabuddies? The Chaluminati. Hey, you know how to like that one. No, that's just the Discord members. They're the Chaluminati. That's the nude show we do once per year.

Okay. The thing is, you guys don't know which show it is. That's a host's only tradition, and you guys don't get to know which show we're naked for. All right. So last time we talked about this. I'm just talking about, I'm just adding to the lore. Yeah.

Come on. Our once a year pre-show nude gathering. Yeah. Don't worry about it. So last time we talked, John Teter was this sort of mysterious man of mystery figure who's maybe on a mission, maybe trying to change history, even though he's technically not going to be around to see it himself because of the way that time travel works in his universe. This is all the stuff that we basically covered last week, right?

Nobody's really sure if he's completely talking out of his ass like on purpose or if he believes what he's saying. But some of the stuff he says kind of checks out. There's certain people who have come forward who said, oh no, this thing is true or whatever. But the overwhelming feeling that I think people are feeling is one of most people I think doubt him or look at what was happening as some sort of prank or hoax or joke. I think that's the general consensus about John Teter on the internet. That's just my own sense of that, but I feel like that's what most people think.

But I haven't exactly told you the whole story yet, and there is one person who definitely didn't think it was some kind of prank, and that woman was called Pamela Moore. So of all the people who have sort of been caught up in the whirlwind of this crazy John Teter internet theory storm that happened in early 2000, 2001, everyone agrees that if anybody had any sort of verifiable one-on-one contact with Teter, as in like private conversations with the guy, it's Pamela Moore, who apparently on multiple occasions engaged in well-documented private conversations with him via chat. So here's a quote from Pamela Moore describing herself from an interview that she did in

2017. She said, everyone thinks I started out asking John too many detailed questions when he came in 2000, but the truth was I had a detailed dream of a time traveler in 1998. So I don't know what kind of person she is. I don't know, I don't know like where her mind is at coming from, I don't know her personally. I know her more from interviews than I do from reading all her writing. Already to me, she looks like a Marianne Williamson. But the implication is she had a dream about a time travel, yes, a premonition, and it

relates to this, which I think most reasonable people could be like, okay, I'm ready, I'm already suspicious, but continue. Yeah. She implies that there's destiny involved in her meeting John Teter, which is kind of interesting. But she sort of like over time kind of like maneuvered herself into being like a contact point for other people who were in the forums to John Teter, like four people on the message board.

Like people kind of like saw her as sort of like a in between. Was there ever any evidence that she actually talked with him? I mean, other than that, they talked to each other in on the message board as if they had talked to each other, no, but there was a safeguard. So because she was talking to John Teter, there was sort of this understood sort of danger that she was going to be encountering a lot of people who were pretending to be John Teter when, you know, she only really wanted to be talking to the real guy. So the story goes that he gave her a quote secret song, which if you have time is like

worth an afternoon or two of Googling and going down rabbit holes all by itself, because it's such a like romantic detail of the story that he would like give her like a secret song that he would sing to her every time so that she could like identify him, that people have sort of like gotten obsessed with like figuring out what that song is. And there's a lot that you can read about just about the secret song, but that's not like what's the over and under being Despacito. Despacito. It's a future song by a young boy Google Justin Bieber.

I don't know. I don't know what the song is. I don't know anything about it. I my understanding is that it's like a short little melody. You know what I mean? Like how Willy Wonka goes like, it's the state farm jingle. Of course. Yes.

And then the oompa loompas come out right. But that's its own thing. You can go read about that if you want. It's not really related to John Teter as a whole other than that people just got really obsessed with figuring out the melody of this song. But here is a quote from Pamela about it from an email that she wrote to the guy I talked about last time, the hoax hunter guy, John Razimus, who I quoted at the beginning of last episode.

So here's she she did an email interview with him. She said, I only I honestly think only John himself knew it. Perhaps whoever he was, he never told anyone else. He told me in a chat, not an email. If John ever decides to come forth, I will have the info to confirm it was the same John who posted as John Teter. And apparently at least since an interview she did in 2017, she is still in contact with John Teter pretty regularly.

Here's a quote about that. She said, the latest package I received had several things in it, a letter from Kay, which is John Teter's mother, a letter from John, an album with a record inside and a CD with some songs on it. But I'm keeping what was on it secret because I am not really sure why he sent those to me. More likely I'm more than likely to find out later. I received it in September of 2016.

My theory is that it's an album called Everyday Chemistry by the Beatles only available in certain universes where they didn't break up. Yeah, that's very true. So what was the thing from the mom? I feel like the mom is an additional thing I wasn't aware of. Yeah. So so wait, can I also ask a question real quick? I mean, maybe you answer this and I'm already forgetting.

What should he not be alive literally right now growing up? John Connor style and we should be able to just figure out where this guy is. Yes, but we don't we don't know for sure if his name is actually John Teter, right? Everyone thinks that John Teter is like an anagram for something. OK, OK, and and depending on how old he is, I mean, it's 2036, right? So if he's like under 36 years old, right? It's possible that what he did in our timeline made it impossible for him to be born, which might be true.

You could always if you go down certain rabbit holes of this, that's like what some people think, what's his other mission is to like cancel himself out of this timeline. But why that doesn't like I don't know, I don't know. It's just like a looper. It's if you think about it in the same way, right? Like if she's the only one who has the song, it just means that she gets to decide who the real John Teter is based on nothing, theoretically. But also like if I had to Occam's razor, this whole thing, you could also say,

why isn't she John Teter and she's, you know, originally started out pretending to be this guy and then we're like, oh, now I'm I can only talk to him. And that's like the beginning of a Mormon religion. Well, I mean, there is some extra stuff here that that like probably time out, time out, time out. Aliens. Yes. Bigfoot. Yes. Yes.

Extra dimensional things. Yes. Yes. The Mormon religion, Mathis is if he on. Because you can go back in history and you can go look at what a fraud that dude was. He saw Book of Mormon, you know what I mean? And which is straight up straight up true. So you'll believe that people can see ghosts. But but like an answer, I did not believe people see ghosts.

I said I would love to see a ghost. I love where you draw the line. I love that you draw the line. I am firmly in the I want to believe camp. I so fucking badly want to believe. I just need to see one thing. I just had to call you out on that. I heard that was like, hold up now.

Well, to answer your question, Jesse, there's like a whole like lower thing that started and after after that post in March of of 2001, there's a lot less uniformity around what that like what official communication from John Teter was. And like a large portion of that is like what this episode is about, but specifically addressing his mom. Like I don't really know what the Lord is there other than that. Like there are other characters in this story and that his mom enters into the

enters into the equation somehow because she is alive in this time period, for sure. You know what I'm saying? So it's like a junk. It's starting to sound more and more like the actual Terminator series and that sometimes it's John Connor and sometimes it's his mom and sometimes it's new characters and sometimes the past has changed and sometimes it didn't change.

It's like that kind of thing. All right. But it gets even crazier because OK, because because whatever's happening with Pamela, right, like whatever the truth is there, there is there is evidence just based on how it's been going that she's at least talking with someone because there's there's it just seems like she is talking to someone and whether or not he's the real John Teter is completely up for discussion. But it seems like she is talking to someone and it seems like she believes what she's talking about.

A lot more than some of the people we're going to get into. But the exact question of who that is is deceptively deceptively complicated because she talks about it and sums it up pretty well in her and in her interview where she says he then went on to explain how I was communicating with more than one John, that John and they need the posts to stay up as long as possible. Now, on the surface, this doesn't seem that much wilder than anything else that John Teter has told us, right?

Like we already know he creates a whole new timeline every time he time travels. And since we know he's done that multiple times in multiple decades by now, it kind of stands to reason if you're able to swallow the time travel pill in the first place that you can swallow the pill, that there might be multiple Johns out there in the time stream at any given time with their own motivation, shaking things up. The only thing that gets murky for me about this is that if they're talking about it creates a new timeline every time that you go back in time,

like, are you seeing other John Teters? If you're John Teter, you know what I mean? Like, doesn't that seem to go against? Didn't he in his post, he said he has met himself multiple times and took his younger self on a joy ride at? Yeah, he did say it. So then that's the thing that doesn't sit right with me about this, is that like the fact that he would meet himself seems to be

against that a little bit, unless he can travel back in time. Like, maybe you travel back in time on the world line that you're on. I really, I don't really know. I have to assume like two. So like if you travel, so like, yeah, but it's all like if you travel back in time on the world line that you're on at a certain point, your original world line and that world line's history are the same and you'd be traveling back on that same point.

It only diverges when you arrive. So you can go back, right? On that original point. But then there's another day that see. All right, imagine you get back to that same world line. I don't know if this is the paradox. This is the problem where it's like, OK, close your eyes for a minute. Imagine listeners, close your eyes.

Imagine you're going back in time. Let's say you go back to the year 2001, right? And you travel back to 2001. At that point, according to John T. Door, there's a split. There's a 2001 a 2001 B, right? Yeah, at least. Yeah. Yeah. And so then imagine if you go down the path of 2001 B, like that's

that's your new path you're on. And that John T. Door says, I want to go back to the year 2000. John T. Door then goes back to the year 2000. There's another branch. And so the question is, is then when it branches off of the year 2000, is there one branch that branches off as 2000 A, which has no for the branches?

And is there one branches 2000 B that then has another branch? That's 2001 a B, right? Yeah, I that's how I understand it. You know what I mean? Like, that's what that's. Yeah, that's how that works. Then he could potentially try to be like, OK, well, I'm going to go to like, can he do this? Can he go? I'm going to go to 2001 B or go to 2000 A.

Can they do that? Or is it he says it's only on the timeline you're on? Yeah, I mean, it happens all the time in Doctor Who. I don't know if that's the case. If that's the case, there's a John T. Door on every timeline. And so every John T. Door can travel back in time.

That's what it that's that's where it starts to get crazy. Yeah, that's where it gets for me. That's the biggest that's the biggest pain point for me in this whole thing, like full disclosure is like, how could you meet yourself? But, you know, we're not sure. So as soon as Pamela found out that secret song was going to start becoming pretty useful, I mean, what I meant to say was and as she soon found out that secret song was about to become pretty useful,

she wrote about it in a forum post from 2009. So this was still a few years after any sort of like official communication from John Teter that we all agrees from John Teter. You would not believe how many people write to me and tell me they are John. Everyone seems to want to be John or they will post on a forum and say they were John and these people were like literally everywhere. I remember like when I was in college and I was watching the John Teter thing happen in real time, like like almost even like back when I was in high school,

I think this was happening, like just people popping up saying they're John Teter, all these weird like he kind of almost became like a modern version of D.B. Cooper, where people were just like, yo, John Teter, like fucking saved, like killed Hitler, like John Teter, like, you know, whatever. Like he became kind of like that type of guy, Chuck Norris type guy on the internet for a little bit. But as often happens in those types of scenarios, one dude eventually separated himself from the pack of like not the real John Teter, like John

Teter clone guys and kind of rose to the top of like the food chain there. And I think that it was for one simple, like marketing related reason, which is that in order to like not get confused with the original version of himself that was running around and like posting and being on Art Bell, this guy called himself John Teter, the second, like with two like Roman numeral two after his name. OK. And I think people liked it because it gives off like a terminator vibe.

Like I think people like got on board because he seems cool because he's John Teter, the second, like he's John Teter, two Mark, Mark, two John Teter. But he was different than the original John Teter in a lot of ways. Even Pamela Moore was saying there's something slightly off about this guy. And she I mean, I don't know. Me reverse John Teter, dude, he's got the goatee. But one of the main differences between the original John Teter and John Teter, too, is that John Teter, too, love taking pictures, love going on TV,

love going on the radio. He even wrote a book about the entire ordeal. He was even making YouTube videos up until shelter in place started. I have like a link to his YouTube channel if you guys want to see. He claims to be any claims to be a John Teter. He claims to be the like second clone of John Teter, a clone. OK, like like a time clone. You know, like OK, yeah, like a branch from a different area.

Like, yeah, like a copy. Oh, my God, this dude. Yeah. But in December, but in December 2016, Kevin Moore, the same John Teter archivist that I quoted in the last episode, blew the lid off of the entire John Teter, too, situation. It turns out this guy, John Teter, the second is actually a like career con man with many aliases. And this is all alleged. I don't want to like start slandering some guy.

This is just according to Kevin Moore. And he turns out the dude was a career con man with many aliases, a criminal record. His name was Dana Lee Stern, senior. And his whole part of the story was just some weird cuckoo bird shit. Like, like he just sort of like decided one day that he was going to be John Teter, it seems like. But the reason the reason this thing went down so crazy

with like a little extra spice on it was because Kevin Moore, the archivist guy, he was actually one of the co-authors of the John Teter, the second book, which was called Disclosed. So now, like he's not only he's he's he's mad about it because he's dedicated his life to studying John Teter. But he's also mad about it because this guy basically like tricked him into putting a book out with like fake fake information in it.

So he's like literally going online, like lambasting this guy. He had like a meltdown telling him about telling his fans about John Teter, the second he like it was like a ranting, like long, angry video. But then he calmed down the day after he took that video down. He recorded a nice level headed explanation of what went down between them and directed people to his site, thecrystalsun.com for more information, which I obviously visited.

And I'll give you the link for right here, Mathis. Yeah. That's for the victims of John Teter, the second page. Then you can see if you want to like go deep into all the reasons that he's sure. You can look there. But it's got it's got a lot of it's got a lot of like the talking points that I just said. It's got a lot of clear evidence showing

Dana Stearns like picture attached to his name. It also shows him as the CEO of something called John Teter, the second LLC on Nevada Corporation. It also has a bunch of receipts and emails tying the whole thing together, showing him like talking to people on email about how to trick people, how to get people to lie for him. It's all there at the link. But the one thing I did want to read from there was just a little bit of this

absolutely insane blog post, which Kevin Moore links to at the bottom of the page. For, quote, research and information only. Judge for yourself. It seems to be from the oldest son of Dana Leestern, who is called who's called Leestern. And it's multiple blog posts beyond the one I'm about to read. And it is filled with typos. It looks like it looks fake and weird, just based on like how it's written.

But it has so many like specific, incriminating details about him that only a family member would know that I'm tempted just based on my initial impression to say that it is at least based in truth and is at least maybe written by the person who they say they are, probably, I think. All right. Very reassuring. They say things. They say personal things about this guy that that like came out just the week

of of Kevin Moore figuring out about all this. Gotcha. And and like this is like the evidence that he used that he discovered this by. So I think it's true, but you should take it with a grain of salt, just in case it's fake. Here is what he wrote. My father, Dan Leestern, a.k.a. Dana Leestern, a.k.a. Dan Stern, a.k.a.

Dana Sergrist, a.k.a. Dan C. Stern, a.k.a. Bob Hempstead, a.k.a. Bob Smith, a.k.a. Dana Leestern, a.k.a. Dana Leestern, a.k.a. Who knows is a pathological liar who has deep-seated mommy issues. He thinks everyone should worship him and needs to dominate everyone around him.

This is compounded by his cowardice of the first order. He fled the 82nd Airborne for Canada after stealing a car and wound up in a prison in Canada. His father had to make a deal to get him out. Then he was unceremoniously booted out of the army after betraying some of his fellow soldiers in order to escape getting a dishonorable discharge. This also makes him a traitor to some. While he looks impressive on paper, it is all an illusion and trickery on his part. His PhD was bought and paid for online for $120.

His Pulitzer nomination for his coffee table book on hacking was done by his agent, who cares? As for his employment, he has many, many coworkers that are now enemies. Even several of his coworkers talk about his attempts at extortion of the companies he worked for. His ex-wives have compared notes and found it very revealing. The lies he told about different ones to the new wives don't hold up under the light of day. His son so despise him that most are considering changing their names. His oldest son is the only one to seriously catch him out and prove him to be the coward and liar he truly is.

At the end of his miserable existence, it has become apparent that almost nothing about the life of Dana Leastern Sr. is true. There are some who believe that he may have even stolen the identity of his oldest son who has had to go on disability. Why else would he start attacking his oldest son within two weeks of his oldest son signing up for his disability? A private investigator will help us find out the truth. And they did hire one, and he did find out the truth. So it was not looking good for John T. or two at this time, though it does get a little bit weirder than that. I can't find any reference to this anywhere else besides the Thrillist article that I like based most of this off of. But maybe it's from one of his YouTube videos where he's like trying to slander everybody who discredited him.

Like if you go to his website, if you go to his YouTube channel right now, you'll see like most of his videos are just him like talking shit on like some specific person in each video. I don't like it's like Kevin Moore is a piece of shit. Like that. There's one about Mitt Romney. There's one about Robert De Niro. He's just like call out vids. Let me say if all the alleged is true, what a piece of shit. Right, right. Jesus Christ.

But apparently Dana Sr. has said that that same son, I don't know if it was like in retaliation for him calling him out, but Dana Sr., the guy who says he's John Teter, has said that his son, Lee Stern, actually injected Windex into his own brother's brain in order to give him cancer. I have no idea. Wait, what? Can you say it one more time? Okay, so like like imagine, imagine this shit came out from Lee Stern, the son, like incriminating his father. His dad fired back with

he, the son injected Windex into his own brother's brain in order to give him cancer. My, my, immediately he'd be like, all right, you lying sack of crap. I keep thinking about that, that Geico commercial where she's like, that's not how this works. That's not how this works. Yeah. I don't know. That's like Dahmer trying to create a love zombie levels of like, I don't know man. Yeah, so, so John Teter too has like been the big thing, right? Like for years for people with John Teter love who like

follows stuff online, John Teter too has been the sort of like big things a relative term. Having seen his YouTube page, he has about 97 views per video and most of it is like cuckoo banana stuff. Sure. Like he's been, he's been sort of like the face of this mystery online. Like his YouTube channel has not ever been his main thing, but he, like, he's the one who does interviews on radio shows. He's the one who put the book out. Like he's the one who's been keeping this story alive, alive, alive for this whole time. But now that we know that John Teter too has nothing to do with the real person who did the John Teter stuff

and that he's just kind of confusing the truth a little bit, I want to also go into what possibly the original John Teter stuff is. OK. So there's one element of the Thrillist article that goes throughout the article that I have left out of the show so far because I wanted to save it for this half of the show. And that is the comments from an interview of an extremely interesting dude who is called Joseph Muthini. OK, Joseph Muthini is a trans-media writer. He's an artist. He's known for spearheading something called Ong's Hat,

which I was, that's the thing that I was referring to in the last episode that I said was like the earliest internet mystery proto ARG thing that is out there. That's about like a weird town in the New Jersey Pine Barrens. That's like a weird sci-fi horror extradimensional thing that started in the 80s and a secret lab and all this shit. Fun, fun stuff. They basically created like this entire trans-media like thing about, they basically invented an urban legend. I would have loved to have known about that when that was happening.

That's so fun. Man, that's so fun. We're going to we're going to get into that. I'm going to do that eventually. I have I have a couple books about that that I just I have always looked up to this guy as like a guy who's inspiring to me. So I was excited to see him pop up in the John Teeter stuff. But here's what he had to say about this. He said, I'm going to be picky with what I say to you over what I've said in the past.

John Teeter is a story that was created as a literary experiment by people who were observing what I was doing with Ong's Hat. And these people wanted to do something like that. I was a consultant on the project, but it wasn't my project. We knew at some point this was going to get out from underneath us and we were going to have to let it go. I thought everybody would get this was a wink, wink, nudge, nudge. But when they didn't, I went to the other people involved and said, let's come out and tell the truth. Nobody would. So according to Matheny, the people who came to him whose names he still will not reveal

Were in it for the art. They're like trying to they really were into the idea of The internet as like a futuristic version Kind of telling a modern fairy tale fairy tale folklore sure seeing it as the modern version of that and it seemed like How cool would that be though? Like you know just to create something like a modern fairy tale and literally watch it kind of come to life before your very eyes And then walk away because you know the internet has decided it's theirs now And you just get to watch this thing become something You don't know what it's going to turn into. That's that's got to be fascinating

Yeah, apparently what drew him to the thing was that it seemed like that Like uh, they were just super into the idea of like incubating it and forcing it into existent We got to come up with the chilaminati fairy tale monster dude. It's not even out of the question. No, I'm saying we don't we don't need to We but we I mean we don't need but like we need to we should just make up our own cryptid and like Completely merchandise off of it. We'll make do a whole episode. We'll wait another year. Nobody everybody'll forget We'll just do a fake cryptid episode. Yeah, all right. I'm gonna pitch it here right now the boston bean man Half bean half man Half bean half man the boston bean man. He's like a little sprite and he like goes around and steals socks

He's like cool spot. Why socks dude. No way dude. He steals little nugs. They're legal out here Yeah, he's no man. He steals all of them the nugs If you're legal weed goes missing The box out of a hole in your baseboards and he goes And if he can smell the that legal government weed he comes out and he gets it and then And then he smokes it I carried a nug in my mind. He's just like hell yeah, it's gonna be fucking great later But here's the thing here's the thing right like we gotta leave a sacrifice out for the boston bean man

Like we're making jokes, but like the version of this john teeter legend that like i'm being told Includes like in jokes from the creators like okay, like, you know the 5100 ibm computer that he needed from 1975 According to metheny's version of the story The people that were working on this just all happened to be old it people who happened to know this information And because it was a piece of like Like little known information That they that just they had they thought it would be funny to include it because it makes it seem like

John teeter has like insider knowledge of something When really he doesn't it's just People who know their shit about computers Uh, but the problem is though with this right because I want to I want to believe this The problem is that while metheny is a legit verifiable guy Who's known to not be like a liar and has actually done the things he says he's done He has a website you can go check it out. He has he's in like people he gets interviewed in like major publications all the time Uh, he still refuses to disclose these names of these people that he supposedly worked with on the project

So and because it's not his project So unless they come forward with some kind of evidence that it's been them all along The only difference between this explanation and the real john teeter explanation is whose word You're taking as true Uh, so he's not but but he's not even the only person who's suspected of being at the center of john teeter Okay, and in fact most people out there will tell you that this next version of events is the most likely one that they've probably heard online in in recent years And it all has to do with an attorney

Uh, who's called larry haber. Okay, this guy's a real guy Because see according to matini After a certain point Once the thing grew its own legs to stand on right? He and the people that worked on it just stepped away and let it go right? I've already said that but according to him the thing that's crazy is that he says that that moment came For the people who originally made john teeter Even before there was any posting on the art bell forums

so he's saying so what matini's saying is that Everything that's happened since the original facts to art bell Basically has been other people the only thing that was real from the original creators of john teeter Was the facts. I believe that. Yeah, I actually believe this completely. I think yeah Most people especially because it was art bell Most of the response is opportunistic. It's people trying to like copycats make a buck I believe that because art bell is you know Same thing with the people who are like art. I just I saw a I saw a you have followed the other

I think most of it is they like that aspect of fame because there's It's associated with it And it's something right like you have a little attention as opposed to none when you call in on those radios You're the star for 30 seconds. Yeah, so we don't so we don't know exactly Who the heck anyone was right at that time Just it's like impossible to verify the identity of anybody posting teeter stuff on the internet almost unless I guess you have a Fucking secret tune that you can sing with the person and then you know, it's them or whatever But almost immediately once these message board posts were done in march of 2001, right all quote official

Publication like public communication since then has been through this guy larry haber Who claims to be the attorney for something called the john teeter foundation? Which according to him belongs to john teeter Uh everybody who knows larry haber knows him as an entertainment specialist lawyer including pamela more and john rasmus Who actually has a john rasmus is this like sort of hoax hunter guy again that i've been talking about and he's not Like looking at his channel if you watch it like it's not super like

It doesn't look very credentialed But he's the main guy who's been looking into this and he's the only guy I think he has his own little theories that he's kind of trying to push but he does a good job of collecting Uh interviews and and statements from people. So that's why i'm using him here He says I think they were fans of art bell They created one of the first internet hoaxes and it blew out a proportion Perhaps they have some book rights or movie rights. They've been sitting on and that's and that's that's so that's his hypothesis And weirdly larry haber himself sometimes half supports this

Except in the quote I have he always refers to a k As the client making all these decisions about the john teeter story rights Which I assume to be the same k that pamela more is referring to as john teeter's mom Right, so that's already another weird thing and according to rasmus is extremely circular and repetitive two hour long documentary Uh on the creation of don't john teeter with the haber brothers, which I think his video is not Super like you should not watch that as fact Uh, but uh Also two hours on john teeter most of it dude. He said the same things

He says the same thing. Yeah, he just talks in a circle over and over and over again for a long part of the video But that's because there's nothing to say. Yeah, according to him and a lot of this is substantiated by larry haber the creation of john teeter can largely be credited to morey haber who is larry's brother Which is then sort of corroborated and supported by the other haber brothers who are arthur and john richard and larry's son benjamin Except for one problem, which is here's a quote about it from larry haber My son is not john teeter. My brother is not john teeter. There is no john haber in my family

So that's fucked up like there's already like they're already making up brothers that don't exist That was fucked up shit and even worse if larry's story is true Then metheny's story isn't true Right like the way that larry says it happened and the way that metheny says it happened don't sync up And so metheny said I saw some people that were clearly using the story as an effort to make money Which I am not cool with larry haber. I don't know who he is none of us do he's not nor has he ever been involved with the group

I was in he's an entertainment attorney. He's somebody who jumped on the bad wagon And weirdly enough though if if this actually is about money The only commercial product ever released by larry haber's john teeter foundation Was a print on demand edition of all the original john teeter posts from the internet called john teeter a time travelers tale Which came out in 2003 print on demand and you can't even get it anymore uh From the print on demand service. The only way you can get it is a copy on amazon for nine hundred dollars Oh god, yep

But that money but that money doesn't even go to the john teeter foundation necessarily depending on who's selling the book You know what I mean? Yep. So there's not even like really a money motivation here, right? uh But somebody still sent pamela more a copy of that book And she said that she doesn't know who sent it that whoever did left a song written in the back of the book But unfortunately, it's not the same fucking song That that that that john teeter used to sing to her apparently according to her

So here we are again in this like the weirdest of muddied waters. You can't even see an inch in front of you Nobody fucking knows what's real anymore So the best I can see is either there's really evidence of a time traveler visiting this timeline And saving us from y2k or Some like really neat like artists with a andrew wk type Mindset tried to make something cool that captured people's imaginations and then some people who got greedy Ruined it to sell a shitty book

Now twitter will have us know that hundreds of millions of dollars was pumped into Uh technology to stop the y2k bug from happening and john teeter did not do anything and I say to you Prove it I'm just saying where did they get the technology? You know, maybe none teeter showed up at each one of those businesses and no He just went way back in time Right when the computers are being made and he implemented the fix right then and there That's the thing

It's like people are like look at this real world evidence to like fly in the face of time time travel and i'm like If time travel is true Like it doesn't matter what happens in the real world like you like that's the problem with time travel Is it's like doctor who like there's no we don't know the rules of time travel for sure We don't know anything about it So it could be anything and that's why it's frustrating and why it's kind of perfect For this type of like art project to do time travel because it's such an enigmatic Thing versus like creating an alien event which is one of my favorite things to work into like a tabletop rpg though

Yeah, absolutely, uh, but uh According to joseph metheny Like that's all according to plan and here's a quote from him He said we achieved what we said we wanted to achieve We wanted to take that legend and write it on the new sphere like graffiti If anybody has decided to believe the john teeter legend pay attention to anybody who is trying to sell you anything books dvds or a belief system attached to this as as leverage Give it a real hard thought before you do any of that because john teeter would not approve

and that is After two fatty boy episodes John still Is not the end of john teeter because before we go today I want to walk you guys through one last outsider theory that surfaced from the depths of forchan in 2016 That made it all the way to famed uk tabloid the daily star Everyone's favorite cesspool on the internet making it to everyone's favorite tabloid cesspool It's about how john teeter didn't actually come to stop y2k. He came to destroy us all he came to stop a nuclear war

with isis It all began Like jesse What it took it was a delayed second and i watched your brain short circuit in real time It all begins in 1943 and the national defense research committee needed to go through famous inventor nicolai tesla's notes after his death To see if there was military applications for any of his research The mit professor they called in to look over them spent three days on the task before declaring that there was nothing of work to be found But forchan conspiracy theorists allege that it was during this investigation

That this professor actually found the plans for a tesla designed time machine that professor was john george trump And soon he would impart what he learned to the future about his future about the future to his nephew donald Who would change history to set on course a chain of events leading to his eventual inauguration as the 45th and possibly last president of the united states of america I have heard pieces of this theory. Yeah, the link to this shitty s article is in the description

That's actually the end of this episode All right. Okay. There you go. Yeah But now I ask you guys like what Do you think the most likely thing is obviously the most likely thing is not that This has anything to do with a real-time traveler, right? Right, but to me the thing that's interesting about this is that this guy Joseph metheny is like being a little cagey about what is actually happening here and I don't really understand why It would be bad to reveal the identities of the people who who made john teeter

Well, because it it's like Well, if you put their names out there take it from them if they want to do this again If their identities are out there, it's easier to track them down. I guess but I just I feel like I feel like at this point like even if somebody did come out like I feel like that's already happened You know what I mean? Like I feel like in this age What if in their mind though if they come out and Indefinitively put an end to the story the art project officially ends and maybe in their mind Why are we calling it an art project and not a scam?

Because they have nothing to gain from it. You know what I mean? They're just putting on purpose to just like well hopes they gain they gain You know, we're assuming that there's financial gain, but there's also the gain of like ha ha got them Yeah They're doing here, but I think they're doing it in a sort of like like intellectual way. They're you know, they're seeing it as like the creation Whole sale of like, you know something like Mothman, you know, it's like what if you could just the boss the boss the boston bean boy the boston bean boy the boston bean boy

Not man. He's a boy now. All right. Right. He's a bit of a iteration. Yeah. Yeah, that makes way the boston bean boy Is he oh my god? It's because he's underage, which is why he steals the legal weed Yeah, and he's not baked because he's like baked. He's baked because he's smoking all that legally. Right. He lost a big bean boy. Absolutely. Yeah Look at us making this. It's perfect. Does he wear anything? Does he have clothes? He's just a naked bean. He's a literal bean I'm saying is he like a bean with trousers or is he just like a bean? No, he's a bean, but he's like he got cartoon feet. He has like the like sticks She's a little like Betty Boop Arms. You know what I'm saying? Yeah

He's like Rayman, but with like Betty Boop Arms But like here's what I mean is like, okay Even if this is people who are like making shit up to fuck with people, right? And they did it in the year 2000, right? Even if they came clean right now The only people who are gonna like benefit from it in any way are people who are actually like willing to accept that It's a fake thing And I feel like the whole spirit of this is that like

I guarantee you that if they did come out and say that we're the people who invented Uh John Teter and Joseph Matheny came out and said yep, that's them The first thing that would be posted on the John Teter subreddit would be like So here's the fake Yep Here's the latest fake attempt to to cash in on John Teter So I I I feel like at this point

I would like to put out a call to anybody who maybe is involved in this if they do hear this somehow If they are still stroking their egos and and looking as far as John Teter goes and you're listening to this I would like to just know I don't care if you go public I don't care what but I just want you to tell me I just want to know Just because I'm impressed and I want to I want to read the plaque on this at a museum You know what I mean? I want to like know what's up. I want to know what you guys are thinking about I want to know where your head was at with this because I think John Teter is awesome

Even if he is fake and honestly the reason I like John Teter so much is because he perfectly exemplifies like everything that I like about Like this type of shit in the first place. He's like, I'm not so much interested in whether or not Everything is true. Like I'm just more interested in this as a way that specifically Americans in a lot of cases tell like stories to each other and I I feel like John Teter is like the og like if there was no John Teter, there would be no slender man There would be no

Momo there would be no You know any of that type of shit. It's cool man. Humanity will take anything and make it a storytelling device if they can The internet being that that the most the newest example, I guess speaking of storytelling devices and john teetor 2019 book published february 7th 2019 John teetor is an asshole by jeff o bryan Sarah Bartlett a sexy 80s horror movie host yearns for eternal stardom or at least to stay relevant for a few decades I know that after seeking out world-renowned renowned time traveler john teetor a hero from the future Struggling author and 80s movie expert jeff o bryan is sent to help her achieve that dream

But such services do not come without a price neither for sarah nor for her knight in shining armor Both are about to learn that john teetor is an asshole that is a book it exists. You can get it. It's a book Oh, that's wild. I want I was hoping it was like a shitty b movie It is a book by jeff o bryan starring jeff o bryan I'm blown away. This exists. There's also a video on jeff o bryan's youtube channel Which has 17 subscribers? That is called my real experience with john teetor. He really is an asshole And he says in the description. I wrote a book about fictional time traveler john teetor

Little that I know there is a guy who thinks he really is the titular character He's also an extortionist among several other things All I needed was google and a little expert level trolling and the help of a few friends to get through to this one That's so good He now also Is being harangued by john teetor the second For writing a book called john teetor is an asshole. Oh man. That's so good. Oh the layers are ever present But don't you think that's crazy like imagine being one of these people

Who's like life is like based off john teetor Like you know, it's not real if you're if you're faking it, right? No, yeah, or you're or you're just severely mentally ill and you truly believe you are john teetor I guess that's I guess that's possible too. But I mean, I feel like most people who are like trying to profit off this Oh, definitely anybody who's trying to make money Yeah, like even even with the kevin morthing though like this book like it was a paltry sum that the book made like it was It was doing well on kindle I guess but like there we're talking about a couple thousand bucks total here

You know what I mean? That's it's not not worth not worth it But you also have to know that shows like coast to coast am profit off of people Like learning about these things. Oh and really like a great. I've always thought this I will continue to think this When our bell host at coast to coast am our bell would shoot down things all the time all the time like all the time And the show was like it was on but it wasn't huge George noi took over and George was like tell me more. What is this about? I want to learn about this thing and what would never shoot people down

And it blew up the show exploded overnight Yeah, and that is better at like getting people to talk about Like he'll he'll like poke a hole in it and then the like wait for the person to answer and that was so interesting about it That's why if you want to share your stories with us, we're gonna become the modern coast to coast So share your stories to believe you we are not me. I'm ready to question everything you say Well, you got two George Norris in an art bell. All right, so it's fine. We gotta have that balance Otherwise, it's too too crazy George Norris in an art bell is like the shittiest party I feel like I'm not I feel like I'm not fully molded or fully scully. I feel like I'm somewhere in the middle

I feel like I'm here for the the story Yeah, you're one of the guest hosts like the guy who was like a Jesuit priest I can't remember his name the guy who'd show up on weekends and he'd host during the weekends I think so wasn't there a guy I'm gonna look up coast to coast hosts. I don't remember his name So many good good guests on that show Well, anyway, I don't know I felt like it was important to do in him like like a definitive john teeter and I know this one

This one kind of ends up being like a big question mark at the end But I feel like the fact that it ends as like a legit mystery and I'm not like a hundo clear on like Who made this or what there is still like this weird element of like Unsolveness to this one that I feel like someday somebody's gonna come clean about it And I just I just want to know I don't care. I won't share. I won't share. I just want to know I'm interested in it. I just want to know From a sociological level just let me know Well, it was a fun ride dude your internet mysteries are wild and they're uh, I'm glad I'm glad you take us down these deep rabbit holes

Gessie, what are you doing right now? I'm trying to find this guy's name. Oh the Jesuit priest. Oh Ian Punnett was his name I'm that guy Yeah, he was a regular host, but he retired because he got tinnitus. No I sometimes have tinnitus. Oh, you're truly truly gonna be following his path. I don't think he was the Jesuit There was a guy who was like a priest. I don't know if that was him or not But yeah, he had tinnitus and he had to stop Oh Okay

Well, I mean, yeah, that's all I got for you guys today. Fantastic man. That's John teeter part two. That was awesome Thank you for that wild wild ride. Um, we've got a uh a minisode compilation coming up very very soon There'll be another four episodes Um, even after that comes out there should still be two or three exclusives over on the patreon and growing over there Uh, and then after that, I think we're due for another fan stories relatively soon So if you want to be dropping some fan stories, I've seen them Yeah, there's so many good ones. We've got dreams up there for jesse to interpret. We've got all kinds of good stuff So if you want already, I will interpret your dream. It's the best. I'll be the best dream interpreter

I'm kind of ready for like an extra chunky fan stories. I think we could do it I think there's so many stories up there now like the the stories just never stop So drop again drop them up on the subreddit make sure you tag it to let us know It's okay to read on the podcast and we will uh, we'll choose a few stories and we'll go through them like we always do Um, and finally again, thank you guys for the support on the patreon head over to patreon.com slash illuminati pod You can go ahead and support us go above and beyond get some behind the scenes extras by throwing us a few bucks And it just ensures that we get to keep doing this and going through weird shit in the world with you We're gonna go if you're not ready to finish

listening to us We're about to record some more and you will have six exclusive episodes to go right to after let me tell you This one's gonna be a good one. They're always Not like those other ones those ones suck I've just been excited to talk about I've just I've just been excited to talk about the thing that we're gonna talk about today So I'm pumped. I'm pumped. Um, as always guys if you were listening drop us a review We're just about to cross 1200 Reviews over on itunes maintaining that five star average. Let us know what you guys think drop us a review

It's it goes a long way to help us out and we will see you all Next week. Goodbye everybody It's ram season which means it's time to serve with ram 1500 ram 3500 and ram trx Hurry in now for great deals on the trucks that are built to serve Right now during ram season get 10 below msrp on the purchase of a 2023 ram 1500 Laramie Not compatible with lease offers or with any other consumer incentive offers contact deliver details take retail delivery by 531 23