Christ With Coffee On Ice - taking it back ft. emy moore

Episode Date: May 17, 2024

Hey y'all ! Welcome to another Friday with CWCOI ! In this week's episode our host, Ally Yost, is joined by special guest and friend, Emy Moore! Emy shares with us her testimony and all the ways the Lord, her King, changed and refined her life for His glory. He took her from the bottom of the pit and into His palace with Him. "Let everything that has breath praise the Lord." Psalm 150:6 ☆ SUBSCRIBE TO OUR PATREON ☆ : https://patreon.com/CWCOI ____________________________________________  Connect further with us ! If you would like to give to CWCOI and support the podcast, you can do so here ! ➤ https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/cwcoi/support TikTok ➤ https://www.tiktok.com/@christwithcoffeeonice Instagram ➤ https://instagram.com/christwithcoffeeonice _____________________________________________  Connect further with Ally ! TikTok (1.9M) ➤ https://www.tiktok.com/@ally_yost Instagram ➤ https://www.instagram.com/ally_yost/ LTK.IT ➤ https://www.shopltk.com/explore/ally_yost Amazon Storefront ➤ https://www.amazon.com/shop/allyyost Pinterest ➤ https://www.pinterest.com/ally_yost1/_created/ --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/cwcoi/support Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hello everybody. Welcome to another episode of Christ with Coffee on Ice. I am your host, Ali Oast. And if you're physically watching, we are always in a new environment, I swear, on this podcast, but it's been so fun. We are sitting outside, too. So if you hear a little bit of distraction or if you hear some ruffling of pages, those are our Bibles just with the wind. The Lord is like this page, whatever. We're going to let him lead here. There will be some birds chirping. But I am here with Miss Emmy Moore. Hello, hello. This is so fun. grateful. I'm so excited. Guys, this has been highly anticipated. Right. Obviously. I'm so glad that this collab is happening. I know that the listeners are freaking out and everybody just adores you and loves you. I mean, I just love what you're doing with your platforms and the way that you honor the Lord.

Thank you. And so it is like honestly so convicting. Like if you guys don't know, she has a podcast. It's called Saved but Not Soft. Yep. And like her boldness, like the daggers that she throws into the pits of hell just through like, I mean, you mean, you mean, you mean. preach and like scripture like you are like spitting fire and it's like it's just so admirable and i just love you for that like you bring a certain sense of like power and just yeah just it's literally power through

the holy spirit and so i can't wait for her to bring that on the pods oh man and yeah no pressure but like holy spirit i was going to say it's not really pressure because it's always jesus and it's always in you like it literally is always radiating off of you where you're like we're not messing around like this is the truth this is the word can i actually tell you where that comes from. Yeah, tell us. So where that actually comes from is my perception of seeing God on the throne. Yeah. I've never talked about this. Thank you Jesus. No, this is fun. It's always been easy for me to see God as a king, to see him on a throne and for him to be powerful and authoritative. And I love seeing God, stepping in his authority and in his power. Yeah. Because there is the awe and the

reverence and the love of God, but there's so much power in the name. There's so much power in the throne. And when I pray to God, usually the first thing I think of is I'm at his feet. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I'm just like, how can I serve you? How can I just be a good warrior? I just think of a general under the king, you know? I just feel like I'm a general for my daddy. At the same time, learning for him to be my father is kind of on the opposite side of the spectrum.

But the first thing that came to me when I met Christ was him as a king. So where that power and that fire comes from is God operating as a king. through me as a vessel. So, yeah, that's where that comes from. That's powerful. I never shared that. So I love that. He just brought that to light.

Yeah, that's so funny because I feel like, so we just recorded for her podcast. Yeah. Like literally three minutes ago. Yeah. But whenever it comes out on your pod. Yeah. And it's so sweet that we're both talking about, and I want to hear about your testimony. Like I honestly don't even think I've fully heard your testimony before.

Oh, praise God. So this is going to be really exciting for me. But I love that, like the way that we both came to Christ was, like our experience was so different. Absolutely. You know, like I was talking about how I just felt, I felt like his love, which I know you felt too, obviously. But the way that your approach when you first like really met him, you were like, whoa, king. Like, you know, I love that. Yeah.

Yeah, absolutely. So I didn't grow up Christian at all. And that's what I've shared with you before. But I bet those are listening. They're like, I've heard bits and pieces, right? Right. I haven't heard the whole thing. The whole thing.

Yeah. I could summarize it pretty well. So how long have you been saved? I've been saved for three years exactly. Okay. That's right. I just had your birthday. I just had my three.

your birthday my golden spiritual birthday on april third turning three on the third i love that last week and it's wild because god you would think that i've been a christian my whole life and you would think i would have been in this since i was a little baby girl yeah the lord changed me and refined me in a way that i never thought was possible when i tell you that i was in shambles i was in chains i was wearing them as accessories and the lord said no more god really pulls me out of the pit and took me into the palace that's my testimony is I've touched the bottom of the pit. I was inhaling the dirt and God said it's no longer to stay in the tent outside of the palace. I have given you the keys. And I never understood that until he sat down and told me that he loved me. So what that looked like was I grew up. My parents

weren't, they were lukewarm, which means they're not Christian. Because if you were Christian, that means that God wouldn't spit you out of his mouth. Right. Right. That's exactly what Revelation 316 says. So my parents were lukewarm, meaning that they knew the name of God, but they never understood the nature. So Jesus wasn't implemented in my household, but I had an understanding of who Jesus was, but I never prayed to him. There's no Holy Spirit. No, there was no Holy Spirit. I never sought him. I was never curious to seek his presence, nothing like that.

My parents weren't encouraging it, anything. And I would like to say that my life was pretty good up until I turned about 10 years old. I kind of have nothing to complain. I had a great little childhood with my brother Avery. He's five years younger than me. I'm the oldest. My parents had me really young. My parents had me when they were, well, got pregnant at 18.

had me when they were 19. So they were kids having a kid. Wow. So that alone was already really hard, not just for me, but also for my parents, because they were figuring out their identity, let alone having to give a identity to their child's, right? So what happened from that was my life was pretty good up until it was 10. Everything was la de la de la de la da doing doing great, playing with my poli pockets and little pet shops and riding little, I used to do motocross when I was a kid and danced. Like I used to love to riding dirt bikes and like doing all that. that stuff. And then when I turned 10, my dad kind of sat me and my brother down and said, me and your mom do not love one another anymore. And that confused me. And I didn't understand

what that meant. The thought of my parents being separated confused to me. And I'm 10 years old, so I have a understanding of what that looks like. And but also not enough where you're like, but not enough. Yeah. It's like I have an understanding that, oh, this is real. And I wasn't just taking it in passively. My brother was five. So he didn't. really know what was going on. But for me, I'm the oldest. So there was also an unexpressed pressure that was on me to kind of be the filler in between. And whenever my parents divorced, it kind of just started going down from there. My mom remarried immediately. And she met my stepdad, which I love so much. And she had a baby boy, which is now my best friend, Austin. And he's nine years old.

And that's my bestie. But I was full of rage and wrath and angry because. in my head I was like you just left my dad you left us you kicked me to the side of the curb and I would just see my dad weep and see him lose the love of his life and and even my my mom go through stuff as well like on both sides I was just seeing my parents struggle in a way of them so much absolutely I can only imagine like the the feeling of like did you feel like you had to pick a side or like you had to have more compassion for the other like what did you feel like being in the center of that being the oldest child in divorce is really interesting because I didn't feel I didn't feel like I had to pick a side, but my parents would kind of just, they didn't pressure me to pick a side, but I was their number one

venting partner. Yeah. I was their number one, hey, we're going to talk about this. And I was too young to even understand, recognize what's going on. And I was kind of in conversations way too early about stuff that I didn't really want to know about just yet and seeing stuff that really broke my heart. It's really heartbreaking to see two people love one another and then make the decision to not. Yeah. Especially when it's people you love so much. And that broke me to pieces. And when my mom had a new family, I was with my dad. There was a period where it was just me, my dad, and my brother. And it was the most beautiful time of my entire life. We would stay up late and watching Adventure Time and always laugh at Amazing World of Gunball and watch ridiculous.

ridiculousness on TV and like me the time of me my dad and my brother was like the best time of my entire life. I'm just always been kind of like more masculine too. I think it's because I don't have sisters and I didn't really grow up in my family. There's not a lot of women either. I have a lot of uncles. I have a lot of cousins that are men. As far as women, everyone kind of in my family that is a woman is really dominant. So that's just kind of what I grew up around as well. So I just loved hanging out with my brother with my dad and then my dad remarried in high school and him just searching for love also was such a journey because you could just tell he wanted to just give everything and he finally found a wife and it was great they got married it was awesome after that happened when I was in high school the end of my

freshman year going into sophomore and after that that's when I noticed there was a switch in the way I was being treated in my family. Okay. And what ended up happening was to say it without saying it too much is the wrath that my father had on my mom suddenly started to be taken out on me. Wow. Okay. I don't know what the click was.

My parents have done just as equally bad things to one another. And I resemble my dad a lot, but I also resemble my mom a lot. I think I look smack dead just like my dad because he. We got the dark features and just like dark hair, blue eyes. But my mom, she's beautiful and she's an extrovert and she's loud and she's just passionate. And my personality and how I operate as a woman comes a lot from her, but also my creativity and the way I holds myself, the way my brain processes is like my dad. So I would trigger both of my parents just as equally. And I noticed that a lot of the things that they would get upset when it came to me,

was just unexpressed anger, sadness, or unvalidation that they had with one another. I was triggering for both of them. It mostly happened with my dad more than my mom. My dad, every time something would happen, he would just kind of bring up my mom. You're this, you're this, because your mom is this, this and this. Just like your mom. Just like your mom. I'm sitting here like, I don't think I'm anything like my mom. And so then that turned into narcissism.

Then that turned into a lot of psychological. psychological and verbal abusement. Things that happened to me in high school were not okay whatsoever. I would get grounded over things that never happened. Jesus. Things that weren't real. Things that were delusional and things that were illusions. I was painted as something that I was never doing and something that I never was.

Because here's the thing about narcissism. To be a clinical narcissist, you have to hit seven of these factors. Number one is being like superficial. so meaning that you are a certain way to certain people, but behind the stage it's something different. Also, lack of empathy, I would be crying, bawling to my parents and they wouldn't care. And there's just like multiple things that just,

and I didn't know this during the time when I was high school, when I was in high school that I was, that my parents were operating out of narcissism, but it completely affected my life. And the words that would come out of my father and my mother's mouth hit the depths of my heart, I'm talking word curses. I'm saying you're this, you're that.

The spirit of fear was always implemented onto me as a kid. The earliest example I could give you, I remember I was being taught how to cook mac and cheese. And my mom set up, you know, you boil the water, then you put in the noodles and stuff. And a normal parent, so the handle was kind of off the stove just a little bit. And a normal parent would be like, hey, sweetie, when you're making mac and cheese, make sure the handle's on the other way. So it just doesn't tip and fall, right? my parents and this is how they operate is you need to move the handle because if you pull it down

it will burn you will kill you just like your friend Emily whose brother died from this. It's like putting it's if you don't do this you'll die. If you don't do this you'll get hurt. We just talked about this today. Always like that. So I grew up but here's the thing my parents would always operate out of the fear of fear because unintentionally because they were kids raising kids. You know what?

I really I just want to say this. This is crazy. I feel like I relate so much to this. because my dad, like, girl, and this is just, I don't blame him, but my dad was a cop for 25 years. There you go. And he had to see some of the scariest things. Right. Like most heartbreaking, awful things, even probably to some people's children.

Right. And so the way that fear has been embedded in my freaking skin since the beginning of time, like, I was afraid to do anything. Like, everyone was like, oh, you probably were a rebel because your dad was a cop and you wanted to do all this stuff and, like, sneak out of the house and do drugs. And I said, I didn't because the fear was. was so embedded in me. I mean, sure. Yeah. That's actually how I was, too. That's funny you say that. I didn't touch no. Life was so scary

growing up because my parents were always like, bless, I love them. But it's such a spirit of fear. We're like, don't do that or you'll die. Yeah. You'll be sex traffic. Yeah. Don't do that or you'll get hurt or you'll be in the back alley with a needle in your arm. My dad's literally said stuff like that to me. Yeah. That's the same with my parents. I know that's like protecting your child. But bro, you are making me so afraid to be here. Yeah. Yeah. That's exactly what happened to me. I relate to that. I was scared to just operate in day to day life. I would even, there was a point even in high school where every day I was having anxiety attack because I thought the school was going to get shot up.

See, but isn't that crazy? I relate to that. So it's really the spirit of fear embedded in as good. And I can't, here's the thing, I can't blame my parents. I blame the wicked spirit that's behind it. Come on. I don't claim my parents. I blame the wicked spirit that was operating through my parents because I've forgiven my

parents. I haven't talked to my dad in two years, but I love that man so much. I love my mom so much. Gosh, I cry. Anytime I talk about my parents. Yeah. Because I just love them so much. It just sucks seeing things that they don't. It's a different type of heartbreak, you know, and having to conquer that.

But yeah, in high school, I was just full of fear. And that fear, because my parents were both so fearful, they were just pulling knives out of everywhere. And everything I was doing, it was combated with narcissism and with fear, which led into verbal and psychological abusement. I'm talking like I was punished for things, like punish and tormented in my mind for things that were like, why did that even happen? Like I'm talking about I would sit in a chair and they would degrade me for two hours, just telling me you're this, you're that. I think the worst thing that was ever said to me that like rips my heart to pieces was, and this isn't to pay him out to be a bad person,

but this is just like what happened. He just told me if you were a person I knew I wouldn't like you but because you're my daughter I have to love you. That's awful. And it just rips me. Like stuff like that would be told to me all the time of we don't actually love you. We just have to because you're our daughter. And that just threw me into pieces. And I don't think my parents are bad people.

I just think there is a really bad spirit that got on the back end of what they were doing. And actually, to just highlight that real quick, I believe my new dad, my daddy God is so good that he's going to restore their hearts. And even if they don't apologize to me, so be it. like I'm here to where I am today because of my testimony and the things I tasted and seen. But from the narcissism and verbal and mental misbehavior, that turned into, it started with anxiety. I remember all of a sudden felt like I couldn't breathe and my heart was always going to jump out of my chest. I remember the first day I felt anxiety. And then that kept continuously happening. And then whenever I was 16, so I'm 22 for reference. So six years ago, I was 16 years old.

and I did sports. Don't ask me if I was good. I just did it because I didn't want to go home, you know? So I did track and I made a video with my friend. I've always loved to dance. Like I said, I grew up dancing and I grew up just like riding dirt bikes and like shooting clay dubs and stuff. I live in the most complicated place in California. It's like half hood and half country.

I don't understand what it is. I live in the most complicated place. But I just loved it so much. And so before track practice, we were in the. high school parking lot and we were just dancing to the song walk it by like i talk about drake and amigos or whatever no because i i just i always grew up on rap too because my dad know those little mini ipod shuffles my dad had the dr dr dr dr dr dr dame album on it with m&m and i was bumping that when i was like six so i just always loved rap music so right before the the track practice were just

dancing all this stuff keep in mind i wasn't allowed to have a phone all throughout high school that was a part of my punishment i wasn't allowed to socialize do any of that stuff but i had like a burner film that my friends would give me and we made a video and I also had a Twitter that my parents didn't know about and I posted on Twitter that night I wake up the next morning and I see it's at a million views and I was like oh first thing I'm thinking is if my parents see this they're going to kill me wow this is crazy because they because I'm not supposed to have a little phone you know my mom ended up didn't not really caring and then I think my dad was just kind of like over the over time or whatever um he still thought social media was really really

weird and like brainwashing but this video just starts kind of half right yeah yeah yeah agreed now now that i'm older but this video kept growing and growing and growing and growing my following starts going up and up and think about this this is in 2017 on twitter this is when it's hard to go viral yeah this is when it's hard to go viral and so i start making dance content on twitter on twitter so i'm making dance content on twitter and it's just going crazy and i'm like okay and was so weird i was dancing i was doing nothing harmful and it turned into people just antagonizing me for no reason. I'm doing a little dance and people are sending me DMs to kill myself. I'm a 16 year old girl and I'm already thrown into anxiety and panic, attack disorder and all these things. And it was just like, you need kill yourself because

we don't like what you're doing. And so the bullying, the bullying spirit, it was happening at home, online and at school. Yeah. It was just like a target on my back for no reason. And I would also like to say, I was not perfect during high school. I will be so self-emitive of that. I was such a hurt person that would hurt other people. I didn't know how to manage my emotions, let alone did I know how to manage another person's emotions? So I was just like a ticking time bomb.

I was a ticking time bomb ready to just explode. And so with all that packed up, as I go into my senior year, everything starts getting worse. The anxiety I had turned into depression. And I start going down this rabbit hole. The verbal abuse from my parents got worse. and it kept increasing. And then also I was with my dad the majority of the time.

So whenever I go to my mom's, he would like tell my mom what I was doing. And I'm air quoting for those who are just listening. I wasn't actually doing these things. And then she would believe it. And then she would attack and ice me. So it was just like I couldn't run away from feeling like I was never heard, seen or loved. That then turned into when it was my senior year 2019 in January,

there was an altercation I had with my dad. And I was depressed. And then at the end, or beginning of my senior year. So you're living with both your parents. I would go back and forth. And they lives 30 minutes apart, which was really wild. And I live in a country town.

I don't like live in L.A. or Bay Area. People think that. When you think California, you're like. I'm smack in the middle. I probably live in the most diverse place ever. Like L.A., you get a lot of city people where I live. You get like city, country. You get L.A., Bay Area.

It's like a mutt. You meet so many different people there. But I'm blessed. I grew up with such a diverse group of people. Absolutely. Because I know how to speak to them. Hey guys, how's it going? Are we loving this pod episode?

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Thank you for your generosity. Now, let's get back into the episode. Yeah, so the Lord, yeah, the Lord is just so good. But at the beginning of my senior year, so I would say like October, because the year starts in August, I start become really suicidal. And I started to just hate my life. And I started having those thoughts every single day, thinking that I wasn't enough that no one was going to love me. I mean, when you hear that every day, you start to believe it. And so I thought there was going to be something I had to do about it.

And my parents made it pretty clear that they weren't going to provide. They weren't going to help me go to college. I was going to go into the Air Force because I felt forced. I was actually going to go into the Air Force for computer science and coding because I felt like there was no other option. Like I thought that's what it was. And I was just, me and my dad got into altercation in January. And I was like, he's just going to yell at me. and then say sorry two years two months later or not two months later two hours later and then the do is the same thing to me over and over again yeah

I feel like I could never escape it right and I felt like I'm never it's an endless cycle it's an endless cycle you hurt me you apologize but you're not really apologizing because you do it again and it was hurting my soul and I was like I don't even want to go into the military I actually hate my life I don't feel like anyone's ever going to love me I feel like I don't even my friends don't even love me because I feel like I'm such an awful person and I don't know how to fix it. And that night that my dad just kind of, he nipped me hard this one time. And I was all re-suicidal up to this point. Your family know this? No, they didn't. Yeah. And of course, I'm petrified to tell them or petrified to tell anyone.

The only person who knew was my, was my counselor at school. Shout to Mr. Marquez. He poured into me when I knew nothing. So, and he heard me when I thought I had no ears. So my counselor helps me a lot. But yeah, so he left the room and I was just pacing back and forth in my room. And I felt like that desire to like actually go through with it happening. And I'm always going to cry when I talk about this because I can't believe.

I can't believe I would want to create or kill God's greatest creation. Yeah. So I'm pacing back and forth. And I remember making the decision in my head that I was going to kill myself. Because it's different when you think about it and you're like, oh, like. Like doing this. When you make that decision, though, it's really sad because when I made the decision, I made it not really wanting to do it. Yeah.

I made it not because, oh, like, I really want to do this. I made the decision because I was so convinced and deceived that I was never going to be hurting or loved. And so I knew exactly how I was going to do it. I was like, I'm just going to overdose because I don't want it to hurt. I'm done hurting. I just want to go to sleep. And I started just write. a letter to my best friends and uh or a text message and i was like i'm just going to do it after i send

this right i send it i get what i need to get and i'm pacing back and forth and not even like two minutes later i hear banging on my front door yeah apparently they were like driving close by or they were like stupid close or something like that and they came in and they told my parents they were like do you know what your daughter's about to do and my my friends come in and he'll acknowledge them my friends erika and blair they came in and just held me like no other and i remember my friend erika looked at me and she said i know your parents are throwing you into the deep end but you have to stay for me yeah like i love you i love you you have to stay for me like we have to figure it out she's like i don't care if i got to adopt you like you got to figure something

out and I was like okay and I really needed that my parents kicked them out and instead of my parents being like whoa what the heck just happened are you okay it's fine my parents punished me yeah so they threatened to pull me out of school pull me out of sport well they did pull me out of sports and that's so disappointing because I feel like they probably were looking at it like oh she's being so dramatic well they told me that I should be grateful for the life that I live it's all just gaslighting yeah it's like you're so How could you want to leave this earth when you're so blessed and you have all these things and it's like that's not what it's about. Yeah. I literally feel worthless here on earth. Like I don't see my I don't see the purpose. I don't see what I'm doing with my life. I don't know why I need to be here. Like it sounds like I'm not benefiting anyone's life. Right. Especially when you're getting told every day that you're not worthy of being loved. And even if they don't verbally say it, you're showing it with your actions. And I'm not going to sit here and say that my parents were awful human beings because there was time. that were really, really great. This is one of those instances, though, where the negative did outweigh the good.

Absolutely. Yeah, that's real. And I made the decision to stick it through my senior year because I knew my friends were counting on me, right? And so then after that. This backs up scripture, too, of, you probably know where it is, where it's like we literally hold the power of life and death. Yeah.

With us in Proverbs. Yeah, within our top. I think it's Proverbs 27. I think that's it. Like that's exactly what you were experiencing. Yeah. It was a word curse because everything that was coming out of their mouths because we have, Genesis 128 says that we hold power and dominion here on the earth realm,

that we're given the keys to the earth. So things that come out of our mouth and we're saying it into the earth realm, it's being rooted into solid ground, right? Yeah, it has so much power. It does. And those, because they were speaking in faith with the words that they were saying, and not saying good faith, like in hope, like with confidence. Like they believe it.

Like they were saying those words in confidence and they meant it. It landed. So dangerous. That's why word curses, people are like, oh, I don't even remember saying that. But you said it and you meant it. And that's why it literally went down. Yeah. And people are like, oh, I don't even remember saying it.

It doesn't matter if you remember if you said it. You said it with faith. That's why sometimes we'll go through seasons. We'll go through seasons sometimes and be like, dang, I don't know why this is happening. God, why are you just pulling all these people and these things from my life? and he's like, well, because you were on your knees crying out two weeks ago, try me by fire in faith, thinking that I want to do it. God hears all things, and he's going to take you seriously. So how much more would the enemy take you seriously?

That's so good at me. Right? So the word curses that were put on to me in my life were taken seriously. And then also, I don't know if you've experienced this, but I'm also a first generational curse breaker. No one in my fam is Christian. Yeah. I've had to break off stuff on my mom's behalf. on my grandma's behalf on my great-grandfather's behalf yeah i've had to break off things for generations

because of the healing that my family ignored yeah my whole my whole family bloodline right that's real so anyways i stick it through senior year and sorry i got a little off track but no i brought you there yeah yeah yeah no praise god but i stick it i stick it through senior year and i moved to a new city i left my dad's house because it just got worse and worse and worse and i was like well my mom's um a little more tolerable. So I moved in with my mom, which was 30 minutes away. And I had a mutual friend with one of my best friends from high school. And her name is Monica, which is now my best friend.

She lived a block away from that house. I don't know how or why she knew I moved there. But she was like, hey, you want to hang out today? I'm like, okay, kind of weird bit. Sure. Why not? We hang out. We click like that.

Very rarely back then did I click with people. If anything, I didn't like it. I didn't even use to hug people. I would. You're very guarded. Right. Like it was it like a, was it a spirit of like, I don't really trust people.

Absolutely. Yeah. Because the, because the, you've been also experiencing. Because it's a spirit of abandonment and betrayal. So I wouldn't want to give anyone anything of Emmy at all. And,

yeah, that's scary. And also, like, I wasn't a huge hug. I bet you're like, girl, this is hard to believe. I was not physical touch at all.

I wouldn't hug people. If someone hugged me, I would want to cry because I felt like it wasn't genuine. And now I hug people all the time. So praise God, I'm heals from that. But I think I also grew up with, like,

my parents not hugging me too. My parents wouldn't, like coddle me or hug me or even when I was sick like they wouldn't really like rub my feet or touch my head or like I wouldn't have home cooked meals like it was just kind of yeah no nothing like that my my grandma would be the one who did that my me me but my parents were always working and they were always exhausted just figuring out their own stuff that it just it wasn't prioritized I guess you know it is what it is I can't complain but yeah so I met my best friend onica and the first day I'm like I don't know what it is with this woman but I'm going to be friends with her for the rest of my life and keep in mind

I'm 17 not stepping in wisdom at all. And I'm like, what's going on? And I start hanging out with her every single day. From the day we hung out, I hung out with her every single day ever since. The first time I go to her house, I got triggered because her parents were together and not triggered like I was jealous, but I was like, what's going on? I don't know this. This is weird.

Her parents were together. They would eat at a table together. They would do chores together. They would pray with one another. And I was like, and they were also a little too nice to one another to where I was like, still playful. but a little too nice to where I was like, you're,

no, right. You're like, something's going on. Yeah. So I'm witnessing the operation of her family in the way that they're working with one another. And I'm about, I'm witnessing this for about two weeks and just kind of hanging out nonchalantly with her,

whatever. And I ask her one day, I say, what do you have that I don't have? Come on. I was like, because something's different. And it wasn't out of envy or jealousy.

No, you're curious. It was like out of pure curiosity of, what do you have that I don't have? Because I'm looking at my life and I'm not really feeling it. I was going to the Air Force. Like what? Like what do you have the I don't? And she was like, we just have Jesus.

I was like, cut the cameras right now. I was like, girl, because I've heard, like I've been to church before. I've gone to the camps, but I never went for Jesus. I just went for my friends and so I could snowboard and all that stuff. But I was like, no, that's cat. Like, no way, right? And I just kept asking questions. Because I was like, what do you mean Jesus?

Yeah. Like I see you got a cross in your house. I've had a cross in my house. Yeah, you're also like, don't we? I don't know. Right. Like I never understood that. And little by little, she started to tell me about Jesus.

And I was like, I was evacuated, you know? And I wasn't like fully sold yet, but I was curious to where I was asking questions. That's enough. She just needs a mustard seed, babe. So about a few weeks ago by me asking questions, she's answering. And she's like passionately answering. She's like, I've been waiting my whole life to tell someone. I love this.

love this it's it was so beautiful and then one day i'm over at her house and her mom's like hey emmy and keep in mind i didn't talk to her mom like that she was like hey i need to come talk to you and i was like oh man she probably i used to smoke like really best i was like she probably saw me smoking she probably think i'm i'm doing something i'm not supposed to do and so i was like she probably caught me smoking or something like well here you are also getting ready to be lectured or something right right so i yeah so that's just trauma speaking that someone's going to lecture me and i'm going to be put down because authority would just always kind of trigger me. And so she brings me in the room.

Anika comes with and I sit down on the floor. She was like, I just want to tell you something real quick. I'm like, oh my gosh, what is it? And she was like, Amy, like, I see you. And I was like, I see you, mom. Like, I see you. She's like, no, I see you. And I was like, oh, what do you mean by that, right?

This woman read me like a freaking book. When I tell you, she started saying thoughts I've had. She said certain situations that she would never. The full spirit of prophecy was operating. When I tell you she said everything that no one could, it was God. Yeah. Everything that no one can ever know. Not even, not even Onica knew because we'd even talk about that stuff yet.

Yeah. We'd even talk about that stuff yet. She's saying stuff where I'm like, no one on earth would know this. And I start bawling my eyes out. She's pointing me to the heart of the father and I'm bawling my eyes out and I'm in her arms and she's just embracing me. And I'm like, nah, this is so wild and I'm bawling my eyes out. And it's.

And she was hugging me and coddling me. And in that moment, I felt the presence of the Lord. And I told him that I knew that he was real. And I believed it right there. And I said to him, I said, I don't know what I have to do, but I'm going to do it. Yeah. And I just was in his arms. And that's like when I actually submitted to Christ.

I don't know the actual day. I know either do it. Yeah. Sometimes I'm like, I don't even know. But I got, so I got baptized about a year later. So I've known Jesus for about four years, but I've been baptized, saved for three. And from then, God just, well, I got, this is a different part, but I got baptized Catholic and then left Catholicism and then went non-denominational.

That's a different topic, though. Right. But it's because, like, I just became so infatuated with Jesus and His Word. And I'm just like a, I'm just such a scholar when it comes to this. I just, like, want to know everything. I'm like a splines. And then God just started to move through me. I mean, I've been influencing for six years.

And I was an influencer before I was a Christian. Yeah. So I was already influencing for three years and just doing fashion stuff. And that's what I've always known. And then the Lord was like, nah, you're just going to share your heart. And so slowly I started to change all of my content into Christianity stuff. And then that turned into a podcast. That turned into stepping to ministry full time.

And then now preaching at places, which is wild. Yeah. And I'm only 22 years old. It's crazy. Which is wild. So, yeah, God is good. He's so good. And you know what I love, and I feel like this is such a testimony too of like how the Lord truly creates us from the beginning is that you found the Lord, but you didn't lose your passions and the things that also made Emmy Emmy, which is your passion for like fashion. You know, you look at your Instagram and you look at your socials and it's so clear that you still have such a love for fashion. And it's just such a part of who you are. And it's like literally how the Lord made you from the beginning. And what's cool is he like, he uses that as a vehicle to, also glorify him.

Yeah. And, you know, like, there could be people that originally come to your page because they love your fashion, which is so Emmy. Yeah. But also a huge part of who you are is literally Jesus. Yeah. And so it's undeniable that if people are kind of like intrigued by you through your fashion, yeah.

You're also leading them to the cross. Oh, absolutely. Which is so cool. And I just love that that's what the Lord does that. It's like, it's not that when you come to Christ, you lose your identity or like you lose who you are or now you're blitz. or now you're kind of just like this stale Christian like it's not that at all if anything. I feel like he makes us more vibrant and he.

Jesus. He brings who we were before but like makes us better. We don't lose like we're dead to the sin. We're dead to the parts of us that we're trying to find validation or worth in other things. But he doesn't kill what makes us us, which is our passions, our love, our creativity. Like he brings that in our journeys and like we get to walk stand like. next to him like in arms with Jesus but we still get to be us yeah makes us better yes I would love to add to that because God was never meant to be bland and boring that's not who he is and I think the

majority of that time he's beautiful this is where I get really confused and it's a wicked spirit that's coming against creation because here's the thing we're supposed to be the head of everything that's happening there is pretty much like seven pillars of like how our world works and that's the government entertainment, marriage, all these things, right? Creativity, all these things. Like, there's, like, pillars that make up society. Sure.

We're supposed to rule that because God has given us dominion and authority of the earth so we could fulfill his promise and his will. So why is it whenever I put on a really cool outfit, it's worldly? This is for the glory of God. Yeah. Who said I was supposed to be boring and wear jeans from? What's that, what's that story? American Eagle?

Sure. Abercrombie. Right. Like, nothing against them. like praise god y'all getting your bread but at the same time but it is actually so clear with like your fashion you are like you're not only set apart and actually this is the word that this is a word that the lord gave me while i was on the plane last night but this applies to totally you and like i think what he's doing in people like us in this generation with this revival that is happening

is he's also setting us apart from the world yes but we are also being set apart from like christians yeah the church within within the community sorry but like he's like no you are still my daughter and I still want you to love fashion and still it is still glorifying him absolutely like I only have the only reason I have a creative bone in my body is because of him is because of God it's so funny because someone came out oh wait it was Chloe while we were at X and she was like I just want like how do you get your outfit ideas I was like I've always just known what I've wanted to wear since I was a kid yeah I don't look on Pinterest even people ask me on Instagram like where do you get yourself like the the the most

The farthest I will go was on Pinterest. Where I mostly get my creativity, I kid you not, is walking outside. Yeah. Like, I know what I want to wear when I walk outside, when I'm walking, when I'm seeing other people. Like, I just go based off of what God created. Yeah. You know? Yeah.

And I think a lot of the times we see as like worldly, but I want to say this because people are always like, oh, be set apart, be set apart. We are called to be set apart. But the Bible also says that we're the salt of the earth. So, sorry, y'all, actually, I'll just acknowledge it. Our cameras died, but we're back. Yeah, we're back and we're better than ever. But I wanted to point out to this in the Gospels in Matthew 5.

We're going to start in verse 13. It says, you're the salt of earth, but if salt loses its saltiness, how could it be made salty again? It's no longer good for anything except to be thrown out and trampled underfoot. You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead, they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. in the same way, let your light shine before others that they may see your good deeds and glorify your father in heaven.

I really don't believe that our God is a God who's meant to have limitations. And I think we put God in this box of, oh, he's only meant to shine in church. He's only meant to shine when I talk about the Bible. God is supposed to shine in every area. It says in Romans that even nature is evident to his creation. How much more could the T-shirt be that I'm wearing? I literally want my outfit to represent God. I want everything I do, my passions,

the things that God is instill in my heart as a little girl to glorify him. And I feel like passions are his. Yes. And people want to put it in a box too that like that has to look a certain way. Like you were saying, Abercrombie jeans and a white t-shirt. And it's like, why are we making God so small? Right. And it's so funny because I told this to Claire's the last night.

I said, I wonder if people would take me a little more seriously if I wore. If you were wearing a blazer and some slacks and you were a little like more bland, I guess. It's because that's what stereotypically right. God told me from the beginning of my journey with him. He said, I've called you to break strongholds and stereotypes. Yes. This is kingdom right here. Yeah.

If God is a God that we cannot put limitations on, how much more would he keep his children in bondage and in sin? He wants us to explore our creativity and things that he's put within our hearts. To express ourselves. Not to make them idols, but to express the goodness of God. And I think sometimes it can become really perverted when people associate it with the world. And when I hear people say, oh, this is so worldly, you're giving the world more credit than what Jesus has created. How about it was Jesus is to begin with? And then the world perverted it.

And now we're labeling like it's the world, but it was actually his from the beginning. So now we are reclaiming what was already his. We're taking back with ours. Fashion ain't the world. Music isn't the worlds. Culture doesn't have to be the world. Why can't we just bring it all back to Jesus? Everything.

Every little thing. I've had enough. Yeah. It's everything is meant to glorify God. Let everything that has breath, praise the Lord. Let us let everything that we, everything that has breath. The things that we're putting our hands into, the things that we're making, let it praise the Lord. And you've got to think, like how you just said, these things are being used for wickedness,

being used to infiltrate and close to be only that exactly that let's bring it back and that's what it means to be the light right yeah to let it shine upon others to be the salt of the earth yeah and i think sometimes we'll be like oh be set apart be set apart be set apart be set apart be set apart but being set apart doesn't mean to isolate because isolate is putting yourself on a box and throwing get to a bottom of an ocean yep we're called to be set apart we're called to be on the same place the lamp the lamp putting it under a bowl isolation yeah no you put it on a stand on a stand for it to light the whole room. And that's literally funny because if you think of a stand, it's something that's above something, right? So you got to. It's elevated. This is elevated. Well, this table is different than the

platform that it's on. And because of that, it literally is set apart because it's two different things. Yep. Do you get what I'm saying? Yes. But it's created in the same realm. Right. Meaning that it's also the salt of the earth. Yeah. So I think a lot of people just to keep it simply, don't understand the Bible and what Jesus is saying. Or we're not looking at it with enough depth. And I don't think we're looking at it. Surface. And I really don't believe Jesus. I'm going to say it the way that it is. I really don't believe that people want God to be good. I believe that people want God to be mean, scary and full of wrath. And people don't actually want to believe that he is good and wants us to operate in creativity. Right. And operate in the giftings that he's given us. I think a lot of people feel full of shame and guilt. And instead of figuring that out, that's how you're

supposed to feel in front of the father. Right. Like the fear of the Lord. Right. Like they have it twisted. Right. And it's because of trauma. Yeah. Most of the time. And I think that's why I don't get so angry with people. I get so angry with the spirit behind it. We shouldn't. Yeah. Because this isn't a battle of flesh and blood. Right. Exactly what Ephesians 6 says. It's not flesh and blood. It's principalities.

It's the spirit's operating in the dark realm. And that's why we have to arm up each and every single day. God's goodness is so good that he wants that to shine in every area. We can't put limitations on that. Is there times for a conviction? Is there times to where fashion could become corrupted and over sexualized? Absolutely. We've seen it. Our job and authority and dominion is to take it back into the heart of the father and have him speak it back into existence and then we infiltrate it in faith.

Yes. So it's just a matter of us taking back was ours. And I hate seeing the Christian space claiming that they can't take back the thing that God has already promised us. We got the keys. We got the kingdom. and we're here. It's written. It's done.

Because he's in us. Yeah. It's literally that. I just hate how much we, how much credit we give to the secular space. Yeah. And how much credit we give to the world. Yeah.

Because it literally says that we are the head and not the tail. We're above and not beneath. Are we not taking that seriously? We are daughters and sons of the king. Like, do you believe that? Do you believe that? I really do believe that people think there, there is such a thing as humility,

but being broken, being in a posture of humility is not the same thing. Yeah. Being broken in a posture and a humility. that's why I meant to say not broke. But even that too, I think people believe that, oh, I'm supposed to be in poverty because I'm, because I'm a Christian. What? What do you mean?

That's not supposed to happen. The Lord wants to give you his riches. He wants you to stay humble, but he doesn't want you to suffer. Second Peter actually says that his will for us is Second Peter, I want to say five something, but it says his will for us is not for anyone of us is not for any one of us is not for us to perish, but for us to have eternal life. But it says his will for any one of us to perish, but for us to have eternal life. Wow. Wow. And when we touch and agree with his goodness, we have the same inheritance.

Thank you, Holy Spirit. I think it's somewhere in Romans, and it talks about how we are co-hears of Christ. I know Romans all today. But somewhere in Romans, it says that we're co-heirs of Christ, meaning that we share his glory. And yes, we also share his sufferings. But I think people like hyper-focused on, oh, we share his sufferings. But have you forgotten we share his glory? Yeah.

We share his glory. Yeah. And that doesn't mean we get to be. prideful and put things above the presence that's never going to be a thing that God wants us to do but God wants us to enjoy the things that he's put in our hearts yeah because it glorifies him yeah not because it glorifies us so if I were to God's always put always put fashion in my heart he'll kill it as soon as I make it about me yeah that's how God is yeah he'll water it though when I'm making it about him just let your heart posture change and let it be for the things of

God and he'll bless it because I told you to see you last night God will give you be the desires of your heart under his conditions because he has already predestined us with passions with a purpose he's instilled those things into us since we are a little girl or a little boy god has already put those things within our hearts it's just us not perverting it making it prideful putting it on an altar and worshiping yeah it's putting it at the feet of the father and saying god you have given me these talents you have given me this creativity how do you want me to steward this does that make sense yeah so i think god is so good that he does give us these things i think is a matter of taking it back because that's what it's about taking it back yeah i love that

jesus thank you god take it back what would you say is is that something you've experienced to where you felt like you've had something we're like oh i've just always loved this and then maybe when you came to cries you're like oh shoot i have to give this up but then god was actually like no i want to use you i feel like i know what it is okay well i think and i haven't even stepped into this yet but i know that it's what the Lord is going to be doing with my life is I've I've always loved being in front of people I've always love to be I don't want to say the center of attention because that sounds like a leader yeah but yes a leader god put me on stage like put me in the spotlight let me lead like let me be in front of people you know let me be on the red carpets let me be in interviews yeah let me be on the drew Barrymore show like whatever it is

like I'm like Lord take me there yeah but before I knew God it was obviously very self-motivated right you know like i was like but i want to be yeah but it's not that that wasn't who i was like i've always had that embedded in me i knew that the lord like had made me from the beginning someone to be special and like set apart and like in the spotlight and be a leader and to be a leader but it was just like we keep saying this word but it was so perverted in the beginning and twisted where i it was very self-motivated and so when i started to step into my faith with the lord i thought that that wasn't going to be my reality anymore because i thought i thought well, I must have only wanted those things because it was not a selfish motive, you know?

And so, but the thing was is I really did come into peace and this is full surrender where I said, you know what, God, even if I'm never an actor, because I've always like dreamt about being in movies. I'm like, God, I think I want to act. Like, I think I want to sing. I think I want to be like on stages. I don't know how you do it, but I think I need to be and I want to be. But I almost was like, man, maybe that was just me like being all about Allie. and maybe that's not how the Lord is going to use me.

And so I literally surrendered it. And I was like, God, if I never act, if I never sing, if I'm never on a stage, like if I'm never on a red carpet, if I'm never an interview. Like I just, I've always seen these visions of me being in like, you know, crazy interviews and stuff. And I'm like, hey, if that was just self, me, just being all boastful about myself, God, then I'm okay with that.

Right. And what I've seen him do with my heart is he's actually been like, okay, so just so you know, these desires were planted on your heart by me, not by yourself. Yeah. Maybe you did have it a little twisted and it was a little self-motivated in the beginning, but I'm showing you that that was me putting that on your heart. And I am putting you in front of, I'm putting you on red carpets. I'm going to be putting you on stages. You are going to be

singing. You are going to be on the Drew Barrymore show, like whatever it is. But it's going to be to glorify me now. Right. Right. Right. And so like the way that I was like, dang God, you're so good for that because I really thought that I was going to have to give all those things up. And so anyway, there's still a lot of that that I haven't like necessarily stepped into. But I do feel such like I feel the peace from him that he is going to have me still do those things and like how great is he for that. Yeah that's good. I know you are still going to be able to do these things that you love and these passions and like for you it's fashion it's like you didn't have to sacrifice or give it up. Yeah. But you are willing if you need to. I had to give up a lot of stuff when it pertain to fashion.

Right. There was stuff that I wore. I'm like yeah. Y'all tripping about the shoulders. You should see what I was wearing two years ago. Girl, you would have been shaking. I was wearing some stuff that was not okay. Even if I was covering everything, even the, I'm even like. I'm even like. I'm even like. like aware about the brands I wear now and just kind of like no that's stuff like that oh my gosh like like I even got convicted like last month about certain brands that were in my closet I just had to throw it out I was like oh my gosh I don't care if I paid thousands of dollars for this I have to take it out yeah I may or may not be speaking about Valencia I know I hate that because it's literally like I spent thousands of dollars on this and then I got thrown up this guy's well okay yeah but I got to listen to that yeah I was literally convicted

but the Lord did have have to refine me in fashion and he had to show me what modesty was was. But he didn't have to take the desire away. No, he didn't. I still wear my baggy jeans. I still dressed like a man when I went to. Just tweak it just tweak it just a little bit. And I wanted to touch on something that she said of like that desire of wanting to go in front of people. I've always had that since I was a kid too. Right. And I've always been told. From the beginning, bro. Ever since I was a kid too. My parents, same thing. My parents, everyone who's around me, even teachers in school would say, you're meant to be like you're going to be a movie star one day. You're going to do this. You're going to do that. I was like, now you're tripping by.

just kind of felt like something like that was going to happen for some reason. And I didn't have, I'm not like, I'm not like, I'm not, I'm not, I'm, like, I'm not like, I'm not like, I'm not like, like, there's like a weird calling on me. Yeah. Like, like there's like something very specific. Like I'm not, I'm, I was never made to live a normal life. I always knew that as a kid. Me too. And, um, I understand what you mean by like, it wasn't like, what, what it is now, wasn't prideful, but you were operating. It wasn't like, you were looking at yourself that you're like, I'm better than everyone. But you're like, but I do think I'm supposed to be like doing something, something in that area. And I want to speak to

those who are listening who are thinking who may be under the question of oh that is still prideful being and da-da-da-da you shouldn't want fame this isn't wanting fame this is wanting to influence others that's what it is which is completely different ever since i was a kid i was always wanting to be the line leader i always wanted to serve i always wanted to help people and i wanted to be the main person doing it not because i wanted the glorification under the gratification for it but because i enjoyed it and i knew i could get it done right right it's because i knew i could get it done i knew if i put my mind to it, I can execute it. And I think it's so beautiful where our testimonies are similar is we started off as

influencers and God made us influencers, which is of the world and then turned us into an influence. The desire on our lives isn't to be like these TikTok influencers or to be famous or all these things. It's to be an influence and to show the embodiment and the love of Christ. And if someone's going to do it, if someone's going to do it, like, I'm ready. I'll do it. do it and um wow and it's it's not the easiest call no it's definitely a hard one but also do you ever feel like you're like but i have no other option like absolutely it's not easy but also i can't imagine myself

doing anything else like this is like this is it this is it this is what he made me for yeah and as far as like now i'm seeing those things come into fruition to where i'm like okay god's having me preach places but here's the thing it's not like i'm going on a stage like my my physical body is going on a stage, but it's God's presence who's given the presentation. It's not me going up. It's my body, but it's the presence of God that's operating through me. And I think that's so beautiful that God could use anyone or anything for him, because I've always felt like I was a Moses of like, okay, you've called me here. But God, like, you know, I'd be stuttering at times. Like, yeah, at time. Even if I'm being honest, I knew that call was on my life before I knew Christ. And then when I found

Christ and he was like I'm still calling you to like be an influence and to be in front of a whole bunch of people I straight up told him I didn't want it yeah because I was like I'm fine right here I'm very good right here I can stay with my fashion stuff I could I'm comfortable I'm comfortable I'm good with my I can make my little makeup I could do all that stuff and he was like no you're meant to speak and you've always known that emmy since you were a kid that you were meant to speak he's like you can't deny it it was funny because even when I was in high school they do many like speech like things like you would give like speeches I would always win I would always win I would always There was one time where I was in FFA, so where I live, like I said, it's very weird.

It's like half gangster and then half country. Okay. So, no, like if you ever go to my city, one block is like the hood and then the other block is a barn. I get you not. Like, it's really wild. Yeah. Yeah. So as to why I said that is because I did dabble in being a little country girl, obviously.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And so there was this thing with FFA to where we were able to like give speeches and stuff. And I did it. and every time I did it, I would get some sort of plaque. I would just like win. And I just always did a good job. Or even in high school, like, and we had to give a presentation or go up to the class and speak, they'd be like, and we got it.

Emmy got it. I've always been able to just flow. Yep. That was a God given. Just like, he gave you that from the beginning. And it just happened from the beginning and then God watered it. And then whenever I found him, he was like, this is what I made you to do. And I was like, man.

But the desire was never to be famous. The desire was to help people because I knew I could help people. because I knew I was willing to help people. As I got closer to God, I understood the depths of the fire of it. And, you know, if you told me the fire from the jeep, I would have been like, you know. Yeah, we've said that. Yeah, like, if we had known before, I don't know. I don't know because, y'all, on a serious note, there's a lot of fire you've got to go through in order to step right here.

But it's all worth it for the glory of God. It is. So, yeah, just know that your gifts are never done in vain. It's just a matter of you stepping out of agreement with the world, reading your. your word, stepping into his presence, knowing what he says about you, stepping into your authority. Yeah. And claiming the goodness of God over your life, you're not meant to be put in a box. Yep.

It's never meant to be that way. What you said earlier, I believe God is using me and you specifically and a few other people we know to change what Christianity looks like. Culture. Absolutely culture. Yeah. It's literally that is we're taking back what rightfully belongs to God. And we don't speak that out of ego.

this is like no this is literally what the father this is what god is telling us right right everyone needs to be saved right got to places in areas that no one else can touch i say this all the time like because we were influencers uh i got to tell this story real quick how we were at the same brand event yeah and like we'd even know and like we were just like planning seeds probably three glasses into champagne right but like bless her but it's crazy because we were in the same place you were you were in three glasses of champagne but i was planting seeds yeah i was going like crazy which is wild but what's so beautiful is that god has put us in those areas because i don't just like the chocela thing like you guys aren't going to cochella to party no you're going to evangelize i would pray

about events that i got invited to and if god said yes i would go and i would plant seeds and it's it's not because i'm trying to party with tigga and all these people like i could care less yeah it's because only fans models need jesus yeah instagram baddies need jesus your favorite ticotter needs jesus Twitch streamers, they need Jesus. And you need someone who looks like me to tell them that. Yeah. Because they're not going to take a girl. Like,

you play the part or look the way, but because you also were there. Yeah. Like I honestly, I actually don't, I'm, because we haven't actively gone out to Coachella yet. I can't even imagine what I'm going to be feeling going on the grounds and like going to these events.

You're going to see people. We are like, this is the grace of God. This is what he is capable of. We are still being invited to. to the same events that I was invited to when I was in the world, I am still being invited to those events. As a Christian.

As a full-blown Christian, you look at my content, you know, it's all Jesus. And I am still being invited. Should I? Probably not. Probably to the standards of the world. I probably shouldn't be invited. But that is his grace and that is his sovereignty where he's like, nah, I'm going to make sure my children are there. So that we can spread his goodness.

But like the only reason I hold any authority to speak on whatever comes out of my mouth is through the power of the Holy Spirit. Yeah. But my testimony, because I literally was just there last year, only knowing the Lord for like three months. Yeah. So I was walking, running around naked. Like, I was like everyone else.

I was taking my shots. I was drinking. I was whatever because I just didn't know yet. I was still so new in my journey. But the reason I can talk about this. Yeah. And like help people and speak to them. The same way you can too when you go to these events is because I see you.

I see you. I see you. I see you. I see you. I see you. Yeah. Yeah. Like glory to God.

Thank you, Jesus. Like that's so. Right. Like we're not going into these environments being like, yeah, so I was born in race Christian and I've known the Lord from the beginning. And you know what? There is nothing wrong with that testimony. Like if you are that and you were sitting here and you were. Praise God. That's what I want my children. Praise God. That's what I want my children. Jesus from so much trauma and gunk from the world. Like thank you Jesus that there are people who have testimonies where they have known Christ since they were little babies. And honestly I plan that for my children. Me too. I plan that heavily for my children. I will seal that. They will know Jesus from the beginning. They know how to talk. You know. So there's nothing wrong with that, but we're not those kind of Christians walking into these environments. There's so much more of a witness to our story being like, sister, I see you right now because I was that 12 months ago. You know, and like what power. Like that glorifies the Lord so much that we get to walk into these environments dressing modestly but still being cute.

Can we talk about that too? Like I can't wait to walk into these events and not showing off my tautas. And I know people are going to be like, she got a cute outfit on. But she's glowing. It's going to be giving Emmy before she found the Lord where it's like, what are you? You have that. I don't. What is that? Yeah. I can't wait. There's a different energy when you walk in the spirit because what an honor. It's funny because, because obviously I dress the way I dress, but it's still modest. So I still wear baggy clothes and stuff that's like really awesome and just like I just love fashion, right? But it gravitates people towards me who wouldn't necessarily be gravitated towards the everyday Christian. There's no way they're looking at you and they're like, oh, she's gripping in the Holy Spirit. Right. There's no way. They're like, oh, her outfit's cool. She's like, she's don't. And they're talking to me and then all of a sudden Jesus, well, I say Jesus, if you talk to me ever, if anyone talks to me within the first five seconds, you're going to hear Jesus come out of my mouth. You're going to know who my

daddy is as soon as you meet me. And so when people would meet me, oh, I like your outfit. Oh, praise God. That's literally how I be, you know? And then they're just kind of like, you're not the traditional Christian. I, it's getting, breaking the stereotypes. Same thing. What do you have that I don't have? And I didn't know. Wait a minute. You can be a Christian and do this? You can be a Christian. and look like this. Right. I love it. It's breaking stereotypes.

Come on. In tradition and religion in the mighty name of Jesus. The whole reason as to why Jesus came in the first place. Like we're called to wash feet. I'm washing feet by showing people a piece of Jesus that they never saw. Yeah. Of hey, like, you haven't seen this. Let me invite you and wash your feet in it.

Yeah. You're not meant to be put in a box. You're not meant to be put in a corner. You're meant to fully be a full representative. of Christ. And whatever passions God has instilled within your heart, let's chop out all the vines and all the weeds and all the things that aren't good.

Like, let's just get that out. But besides that, like, let's cultivate the real thing that God has placed deep within sight of you. I think when people see, like, you're wearing something modest, but going somewhere to evangel, like, there's something different about you. And I can't put my finger on it. And people will tell you, I don't know how often you,

well, we've gotten this together of, like, people who don't know the Lord just come up to us. like you just have such good energy yeah it's always the vibe it's always the vibe yes such a good vibe it's the holy spirit yeah and then this there's something i always say i'm like it's so funny that people don't believe in the lord but they'll walk in a room and say that the energy's off girl what or like you're you're clearly acknowledging that there is a vibe or an energy about us that is good but it can't be god and it's good and who determines good right like there's someone who determines it and then there's someone who makes it.

So I just, I just think God has a very strategic way of the way that he plants seeds and uses his children to evangelize. Yeah. And we have to stop putting his plans, his strategies in a box. Yeah. And to our own understanding.

He's the shot caller. Yeah. We're just meant to obey it. Yeah. So. God's go good. God's good. Bro, this was awesome.

No, really good. I loved this. No, this was, I'm like, girl, I could keep going. I'm like, dang. This was really good. Thank you so much for us being vulnerable and like sharing all of that about your testimony. I love you. I'm so proud of you for everything that you've come from.

Like, praise God. Yeah. Praise God. It's literally like, um, was it Shadrach Meshach and Abendigo going through the fire. They had to turn it up seven times and they still left not feeling, not smelling like smoke. Yeah. Or having anything burnt off of them. Yeah.

And it said that people even watch them go through the fire. I had to go through the fire and come out, not. smelling like smoke so people know that God could do the same in other people's lives. Wow. That I've touched the pit. Yeah. But God gave me the keys to the palace. That's my story.

Yeah, it's amazing. That's, and that's where God wants to take. Anyone who's listening, like, if this is your first time here and you, like, feel like you're in a pit, God is urging you to believe that you have a place, a bedroom, a space in the palace. Yeah. And he wants to take you there. It's just a matter of touching and agreeing and saying yes to him.

And it doesn't take much. It starts with receiving his love. Just fall in love with him. Yeah. That's it. Just fall in love with him. And he'll change everything. Just seek his face.

Just get to know his heart. He's the prize. He is. He's the everything. Once you lock eyes, everything else just starts to unveil. It's so good. God is good. Thank you guys so much for tuning in.

Also, Emmy, I know I kind of already spoke. It's saved, not soft. Is her podcast. But where else can everybody, if they've never heard, of Emmy Moore. Where can they find her? Oh my gosh, I should have plugged you on mine. I even think about that. I don't, I don't have guess on. So I don't need to plug them real quick. Okay. So you can find me. Oh my gosh. Now I got to plug myself. Twitter. No, I don't know. Twitter anymore. I don't either. Twitter's scary. It's like literally demonic. Well, it's not even called Twitter no more. It's called X. Buy. What's going on. It's going on. It's gone. It's going on demonic. It's given like scary. Yeah. But, um, you can find me on Instagram. E. M-y-M-M-Y-M-O-R-E-E. And I'm black with an. And I'm TikTok, Emmymore 3. And then as far as my podcast, it's Save Not Soft Podcasts on YouTube and then on Instagram and TikTok, Save Not Soft Podcast.

Are you not on Spotify or Apple? Yeah, I am too. Okay, good. Yeah. Spotify and Apple, Save Not Soft. Okay, not Soft. Okay. And then that's that.

Okay. Perfect. Yay. But yeah, that's, if y'all want to do any, you know. Yeah, y'all find her. She's lit. If you're ready for like some fire and flames and just if you're trying to be convicted. Yeah.

Let me warn y'all real quick. Because I am. Soft speaks enough. Yes. But like it's exactly what it sounds like. We're straight, but we're not. I'm not straight. We're not soft girl.

Yeah. Right. So if you're with love, it's good. Absolutely. We all need that. If you're ready to be convicted and you're in a posture to where you know you need that conviction and you need a step up and you're tired of kind of people beating around

the bush and quite honestly the prosperity gospel. There's too much of it anyway in the world. Oh my gosh. Right. In the Christian space, there's so much fluff. There's lives. the stake to beat around the bush of the gospel and what my ministry, the goal of it is to know that you're heard seen and loved by Christ. Heard seen and love so much that the truth has to be said

under any circumstance, even if it may sting just a little. But come if you're ready. If you're not ready for it and you need to just like be refined behind the scenes. Like, but I'm not saying that my podcast ain't full of love, but it is a lot of conviction and it's a lot of mature topics. I'm so proud of you. I'm proud of you, girl. I love you. I love you. So much. So much. Hey, well, I also like to say this thing where we do a little outro. Well, first off, just thank you guys so much for tuning in. I hope that this touched so many hearts and you guys enjoyed it. Hopefully there are plenty more episodes of me and Emmy together in the future. In Jesus name. This will not be the only one. No, there's no way. Yeah, there's no way.

There's no way. But thank you guys for tuning in. Hey, can we actually do something really cool today, y'all? Can we just show somebody how cool Jesus is? Come on. Can we show somebody how cool Jesus is today? on assignment um i think that it's great to and this is what i've been saying but season three has been giving boldness i feel like that's the overall theme of like this season particularly because up until this point i've always said you know show his compassion show his love show somebody jesus just the way that you radiate just be kind right yeah but and i said this a bit on on the episode that we did for save not soft but we need to start speaking his name we need to start saying his name jesus can we show how cool he is but also can we start saying his name come on

Let's start showing people the good news, but telling them the good news. Like speaking his name and telling people where they can receive true, real actual freedom, which is through Christ. So can we be a little bold? Yes. A little extra boldness. I love you guys. Thank you for tuning in. I will see you next Friday.

We love Emmy. Bye, everybody. Bye, bye. Bye. Bye. If you guys can't wait until next Friday for another. episode, you are in luck. Subscribe to our Patreon where you will have early access to future episodes and occasional surprise bonus episodes. Make sure to follow us on Instagram and TikTok for more

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