Christ With Coffee On Ice - what should my standards be with dating?

Episode Date: February 7, 2025

Hey y'all ! Welcome to another Friday with CWCOI ! In this week's episode, our host, Ally Yost, goes through submissions sent in by you guys and shares her spiritual wisdom. Ally talks through topics such negative thoughts, being pursued, and heartbreak. We hope you love this episode and let us know if there are any more topics you'd love to hear more on! "We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ." 2 Corinthians 10:5 _____________________________________________  ☆ JESUS FREAKS | OFFICIAL TRAILER ☆ : https://youtu.be/DbbJHm0WfJg?si=ErjC8Z9_TmC5VLar ☆ SUBSCRIBE TO OUR PATREON ☆ : https://patreon.com/CWCOI  If you would like to give to CWCOI and financially support the podcast, you can do so here ! ➤ https://www.paypal.me/CWCOI CWCOI MERCH ➤ https://allyyost.com _____________________________________________  Connect further with us ! TikTok ➤ https://www.tiktok.com/@christwithcoffeeonice  Instagram ➤ https://instagram.com/christwithcoffeeonice _____________________________________________  Connect further with Ally !  TikTok (2M) ➤ https://www.tiktok.com/@ally_yost  Instagram ➤ https://www.instagram.com/ally_yost/  ShopMy ➤ https://shopmy.us/allyyost Pinterest ➤ https://www.pinterest.com/ally_yost1/_created/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hello, everybody. Welcome to another episode of Christ with Coffee on Ice. I am your host, Ali Yost, and it is a joy and honor to be here with you guys this Friday. Happy Friday, everyone. How are we doing? Before I just jump into everything, I want to check in on y'all. I hope that your hearts are doing well. I hope that your minds are doing well. Your spirits are doing well. And yeah, I also would just love to start this episode with prayer. I want to bless y'all. I want to bless you. I want to bless y'all especially because you guys were so quick and willing to just bless us here in l.A. last week with us praying i would love to bless you guys and just pray for you so heavenly father lord first and foremost we love you so much and i am so grateful for the way that we all got to wake up this morning

and that today is the lord's day today is your day as every day is father and so whether my brothers and are listening to this at the beginning of their day or the end of their day, God, I just pray a blessing over them. And yeah, we're just so grateful, Aba, for today. And I think sometimes the worries of the world can take us away from remembering that the breath in our lungs right now is a gift. And so, God, we will not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow has enough worry of its own. And we will just worry about being present with you right now, God. And so if there's anything that could be distracting for my brothers and sisters that could be worrying them or making them anxious, Lord, I just pray right now for a peace that surpasses all understanding. Holy Spirit, I just ask right now,

Holy Spirit, who is our comforter? I just pray for comfort over my family right now, God. I just pray for comfort over them, that even if it's just for this hour of us sitting down together. But I also pray for a peace for the rest of their day. That just doesn't make sense because they were once anxious before listening to this episode and now they're not. And I pray that that piece

actually stays with them for the rest of their day. But especially as we're sitting down together right now, God, I just pray for an escape, just a way to escape in your presence, in your spirit, God,

that we just get to have fun conversation, maybe even real conversation, but just we're just communing together. and that all worries will just go in Jesus' name. I bless them. I bless their families, Lord. I just pray for health over them.

And everyone that they love, God, I just pray a protection over them, that no weapons formed against them or their families will prosper in Jesus' name. And that today will be a good day. Thank you, Jesus, that you are with us, that your spirit is always with us and we are never alone.

In Jesus' name, amen. Well, hi, guys. I will be honest and say, I don't really know what we're going to do today. I didn't really make a plan. I tried to, but this is when I just, I really rely on the spirit. I'm really relying on you. But it's true. I'm going to need him to show up today because I don't really know what we could talk about. I have some ideas and it's kind of, hear me out, hear me out. We might hate this. We might love it. I would love to hear your guys's feedback because ultimately at the end of the day, I want to do what pleases the Lord, but I also want to do what pleases y'all and, like, is fruitful for you guys, you know? Like, you're investing the time to come here and

listen, and I want it to feel like you're getting something that you asked for and that you love. And so as long as my Heavenly Father is like, I love that too, we'll do it. But I felt today that we could kind of do something like we used to do on Girlie Popcast. Back in the day when I had my podcast before this one where you guys would write in and submit like questions or just things that are on your heart and we could talk about it. And so I did post on my Instagram stories. I was asking for you guys to just throw out some topics and things that you would want to talk about on the pod.

And some of these I feel we could discuss in just a couple of minutes that we couldn't, I don't know, I don't know if we could do like a whole episode on it or not. But what if we just kind of popcorned around today, just briefly talking and touching on certain topics that you guys have brought up that you want to hear about? It's kind of nostalgic of us to do this if you are somebody who has been listening since Gurley Popcast. But maybe it can be fun. These aren't necessarily scenarios because that is more of what we did back on that pot is we would talk about certain scenarios or things that you guys were in. But we could talk about things that obviously are weighing on your heart that you would love clarity on. So why don't we just

do that? Why don't we just not limit ourselves to one topic on this episode? Let's talk about multiple things. Also, if you are wondering about this hat, this is one of my favorite pieces of merch that we have with Jesus Freaks. So if you watched our reality show series that Ashley and I have started on YouTube, you know exactly what this hat is referring to. I'm literally just a daughter. I'm just a daughter. but it's kind of giving if you know, you know, and it's my favorite piece. Like this hat and maybe even the hoodie, because on the other side of the hoodie

on the front it says, I'm just a daughter, but on the back it says, and last time I checked, daughters don't lift anything heavy or they don't carry anything heavy. That was a moment in the show. That was just iconic. So yeah, anyway, it is available

if you would like to match me and it's embroidered. It's like the quality, actually. Surprised me. I said, okay, the merch is eating. I am obsessed with this hat. So anyway, if you're curious, It is available.

Okay? We also have our coffee on ice. The merch with Christ with coffee on ice has always been available. It is still available. I love this freaking Tumblr. You guys, I use it like almost every day. I love it. It's so convenient.

Sorry if that's distracting, the ice. Okay. All right. Guys, today is a good day. Can you feel it? I can feel it. Today is a good day. Regardless of how you felt waking up this morning.

it is. Okay, let's see. Let's see. Oh, okay, this one. How to overcome bad constant thoughts. This is something that I literally had to do last night. I don't know if this is something for y'all, but typically for me, bad thoughts can come at any time. Okay, we've all experienced that warfare. It's so dumb and inconvenient and stupid and annoying, but the enemy and his little minions are always trying to like throw nuggets of just ickiness, discouragement, bleh. In our minds all the time all day. there are no limits to that. But this is something I have to do as well. We're all in that boat, y'all. Sometimes there are some bad thoughts that can come into our mind. And it doesn't always have to be the darkest of dark thoughts. It could even be as simply as, you know, a thought

crossing your mind that's saying, you're not good enough. You know what I mean? You're unworthy. You suck at this. You know, whatever that sounds like where it's just not giving you peace. It's not encouraging you. It's not edifying you. It's not lifting you up. It's not from God. If it's not doing any of those things because God is an encourager. He is our cheerleader. He is always cheering us on. He loves you. He adores you.

He believes in you. And so any thought like that that comes through your brain is not from your Abba. That is not coming from your Heavenly Father. So obviously we can say, all right, it's warfare. Cool. How do I overcome these bad thoughts? Especially if maybe it's like the same bad thought that comes back often. I think just things.

I'm going to talk from a POV of Allie and what's worked for me. Okay. What's worked for me and sometimes these thoughts are more stubborn than others. Like sometimes it really is just a simple, I rebuke you in Jesus name and it's gone. But other times I've had to out loud like, okay, if you're watching, you can like punch like just keep saying the same thing over and over. Like keep saying the same truth over and over. Whether that's scripture in that moment where you're like no weapons formed against me will prosper. in Jesus' name, what are some other scriptures that you could speak over to yourself in moments like this? Let's look it up. Okay, Hebrews 412, for the word of God is alive and exerts power and is sharper than any two-edged sword and pierces even the dividing of soul and spirit and of joints from the marrow and is able to discern thoughts and intentions of the heart. Second Corinthians 10.5 would also be a really good one that you could speak over to yourself in moments like this where you're having just really icky thoughts. We destroy every proud obstacle that keeps people from knowing God.

We capture their rebellious thoughts and teach them to obey Christ. And after you have become fully obedient, we will punish everyone who remains disobedient. Another translation says we demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God. And we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ. So this is basically being like every thought, every thought that I have will be obedient to the truth of Jesus. We take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ. Sometimes it's more stubborn than other times. And so if there are moments where you're like, okay, I don't understand like I prayed and I'm still having these thoughts, an example is just how persistent the enemy really can be, that sometimes it doesn't take one same.

rebuke. It's like you really got to like punch him in the face a few times for him and his little minions to run away. And I've seen that. I've seen that where sometimes it's easier to rebuke in just a moment versus I have to pray for multiple minutes on end and just intercede and speak truth over me. I think the most effective way to do it is obviously your own words, but just speaking the word of God over your situation. And the beautiful thing, y'all, it's even what I just did, Google. If you do not know what verse could help you in that moment, well, what are you feeling? I'm having a lot of bad thoughts. You're going to Google Bible verses to help combat bad thoughts. You know what I mean? I utilize the internet so much on my personal walk with Jesus.

And so if you don't have this whole thing memorized and you don't know what scripture to use in whatever situation you need it, I really think that the internet can be your friend. There's just so many resources and incredibly helpful Christians who have, now is everything reliable on the internet? No, don't trust all of it. But most of it, I feel you can. You know, if you just need a simple Bible verse, Google it. What are you feeling? I'm feeling fearful.

Bible verses to encourage you to not be afraid or Bible verses for fear. You know what I mean? Bible verses for anxiousness. If you feel like you're spiraling into a panic attack, you can also just call on to the name of God. I think calling on to the name of Jesus. us and asking Jesus for help is like those sinking moments, you know, with Peter walking on the water and he's sinking is like calling out to Jesus and being like, I am literally sinking right now, God, I need you. Sometimes we don't have the energy to know the things to say. But our simple cry to Jesus in that

moment, he will send his spirit and he will comfort and he will combat for you. You know, sometimes our battles are too big for us to do by ourselves. And of course, you know, Jesus has given us the authority and we do have the Holy Spirit. Like we carry that in us. And so we absolutely can rebuke and we can we can fight and we can do those things through the strength of Jesus. But sometimes we just need him. And so it's okay that even in those moments, you call out to Jesus and you're like, ah, I don't even know what to do, God. I literally feel like I'm on the brink of a panic attack. I need you Jesus help. He will come. He will come because he cares about you and he loves you. And he's not going to let you sink. He's not going to let you sink in that moment. So I just think sometimes too,

remembering that, you know, you don't always have to like fight your own battles, you know. Exodus 1414 says the Lord will fight for you. You need only to be still. And sometimes we just need Jesus to give the enemy a good old knuckle sandwich, you know? And we can't always pick ourselves up in those moments. I have pleaded to the Lord at times where I'm like, I can't do this. I literally physically can't pick myself up, God, I need you. And that's what he's there for. That's what he's there for. Yeah, I don't know if that helped at all. But I think the best thing to do is word of God, speaking truth over yourself, rebuking multiple times if it's what you have to do. And give it a little umph, all right? Give it a little umph. I want to hear some authority in what you're saying and I want to

hear some faith in what you're saying, even if it's as small as a mustard seed, okay? Because that's biblical. God told us that we just need faith as small as a mustard seed. Okay, you don't need to like break out into the Hulk, okay? But even if I want to hear faith in what you're praying, because that also is so powerful, is believing in what you're praying, and it doesn't hurt to get a little angry. It does not hurt to get a little angry

because something that I've learned is anger is actually not a sin. It's making sure, scripture says, to make sure that we are not sinning in our anger, but getting angry in itself is not a sin. So get a little mad. Get a little mad. there are times that I have literally screamed at the devil. And I just feel like at times it was so much easier.

And I guess tempting for me to just lay down and accept what was happening to me in that moment. But I've so many times about the Holy Spirit like snap me out of that and be like, I'm sorry, there's a lion in you. There's a lion in you. And it's from the spirit. It's from the Holy Spirit. You can fight right now. You are the head.

You are not the tail. Like you stand above the enemy. We actually in the ranking, like if you're looking at the spiritual ranking and whatever, we are above the enemy because of Jesus, because of Jesus, y'all. It's nothing that we earned or did. But it's like if you have the spirit of God dwelling inside of your heart, you automatically rank in authority over the devil, over all of his evil. So where's the lion? And I know that this is situational.

Sometimes, like I said, we don't have the energy and there's grace. It's okay. but if you can pick yourself up in moments like that and be like, I'm sorry. Last I checked, I rebuked you and I said you were not to return. And so to the spirit of discouragement, to the spirit of lust, to the spirit of anxiety and worry and fear, or whatever is filling your mind, I bind you and I send you back to the pits of hell where you belong and you will not return. I plead the blood of Jesus over my mind.

And get mad. Like literally get angry. It's okay. I've done it multiple times and I felt the Lord be like, get up, you can do this. I want you to go to war right now and scream at the devil a little bit and tell him to go. Because yeah, I don't know why, but sometimes I think we're just like more willing to be like, it's just happening to me and it sucks and I just, I feel anxious and I don't know what to do. Like you literally have a weapon.

You have multiple weapons actually that our Heavenly Father has given us to fight these demons and darkness, we're not going to lay down. We're going to use them. We're going to use the spirit. We're going to use our faith. We're going to use the word of God. And that's what I have to say to that. Okay, period.

That's what we're going to do. Anyway, was that helpful? Okay, moving on. Next thing. Let's see. My sister submitted one. She said, Gracie Mae and Daisy guest appearance. My dogs, that would be chaotic.

I don't know if we can bring the girls on the pod. Maybe one day. It would be too much. Someone said, attention at all. What does pursuing someone? look like. Okay, I don't understand the attention at all part. Love you. I love you. But it's only because you're only allowed to say so much with these submissions. Like they can't like send a whole sentence. So I'm sure she like had to keep it brief. I would assume that what she's saying is like

attention from a godly man, like any attention at all. What is that? And what does pursuing someone look like? Yeah. Let's just talk about that. I think that any man who is being led by Jesus would pursue you the same way that Jesus pursues us. Because Jesus invented pursuit. He did. He pursues all of our hearts. He pursues us every day. Even the ones that aren't saved, like even me before I was saved, Jesus was pursuing me. And he was knocking at my door and he was consistent and he was persistent. But it did take me accepting the invitation and being like, okay, Jesus, okay, I want to be your friend. Okay, yeah, I want to get to know you. So I think pursuit is not strong. stalker behavior. Okay, there's another side of the spectrum where it's a little too much pursuit where it's like, okay, now this person doesn't even have the opportunity to say yes or no, you're just forcing yourself on them. But there is a level of consistency and clarity. Clarity. I like want that in a rainbow with sparkles right now. Yeah, clarity. If it is unclear and you don't know if they're pursuing you or not, either, I don't know, they're just simply not being led by the Lord because,

I just, I feel if a man was being led by Jesus, Jesus would literally show him how to make it clear to you. So either he's just, he's not abiding in the spirit. I don't know. It's just a theory I'm having. Or they are not pursuing you the way that God intended pursuit to be. Or they're just simply not pursuing you. And they're just kind of like entertaining it. Maybe they like the attention.

Maybe they like a little bit of a chase. Maybe they like the flirtatious part of it. But they're not actually interested in like person. pursuing you and you alone. And so those are a few of my theories if it's not clear, but I just know that if someone was ready to pursue you, you would know that you were being pursued. It's just obvious. Like they're just being very clear about what they want, whether that's verbally or their actions. Actually, I think both would be great. I think actions and words are very important because there have been times where a man has pursued me physically, right? Like taking me.

me out and doing all these things, but there was no conversation about what we were or what was going on or what his intentions were. And so I think a real man of God, I think a real man of God is going to tell you his intentions like from the get go, like straight up, right at the start. Before he even takes you on a date, I feel like his intention. Now his intentions don't have to be so intense where he's like, I think I want to marry you, but I want to date you first. Like, I mean, obviously all of our intentions as Christians should be we're dating to Mary, right? But I think at the least, he should be like, I really want to get to know you more and I want to take you out. Like I want to get to know you more. I'd love to start seeing you. I want to take you out on the town, girl. Whatever that

sounds like, but it's very clear that he, he's like, I am interested in you and I want to take you out. And then I think another thing that would be really healthy is like after that date, he's continuing to pursue you. And he's, you know, saying things like, I want to take you out again or I want to see you again. And then as time goes on, maybe by the third date, fourth date, I think by then, it should be like clear in his intentions of I really see this going in a really great way. And maybe he's not necessarily asking you to be his girlfriend yet. But he's like, I really want to keep seeing you because I would like to get to a place of like really dating each other. There's just a healthy amount of communication. And it doesn't have to be love bombing, going all in, saying, I want to marry you right from the beginning.

But there's that communication both in the natural, in the physical, and also verbally where the things are being said, that he is looking for a wife. Maybe he's not saying you're the one yet, because that might be giving intents. But he's saying, I'm looking for a wife. These are my intentions when I date a woman. And I would like to take you out. And I would like to get to know you more because I am looking for my wife. and you seem really lovely, and so I'd like to get to know you more. That, I feel, is a healthy pursuit.

Man of God. Oh, my gosh. Yes. Right? And I'm not saying a man can't be shy. You know, he doesn't have to be like crazy bold, but communication is key. Okay, clarity is what I'm saying. Clarity is very important, and I think that's how you'll know someone is pursuing you.

Because I'll also say one more thing about this is that anyone can flirt. Anyone can flirt. Okay. Anyone can give you googly eyes. anyone can take you to church. Anyone can be a little extra flirty to you, whatever. Anyone can do that. But I want to see the pursuit.

And I want to see like kind of an old-fashioned pursuit. I don't know. I want to see a pursuit that's like, I want to take you to dinner. And I want to feel like I'm worth being taken to dinner. Even if it doesn't work out, like, okay. I feel people like argue that, you know, just investing and taking women to dinner.

or all the time gets expensive. And it's like, okay, well, how many women is he taken out? Oh my gosh, does he think every woman he meets is, like, worth dating and could possibly be his wife? Or is he being discerning at all? Is he being discerning at all with the Lord? You know, I don't know how much I love that because it's like, well, is he taking a woman out, like, four times a week?

Oh, my gosh. I would like to think that you are worth one dinner every so often, even if it doesn't work out. But, like, yeah, I think that would be sweet. That's just me, though. Maybe not everybody's comfortable with that. Maybe some people want something a bit more casual, like a coffee date or whatever. That's fine. But me personally, I want the old school.

I want the, he's taking me to dinner, and he's showing up at my front doorstep, and he's gotten out of his car, by the way, gone up, rung the doorbell, knocked on the door. I come out. He opens my car door for me, and he takes us to dinner. I don't know. Am I crazy for that? That's just an alley thing, probably. I know there are other women that feel the same way, but that's what I want.

That's what I want. And that's giving clear pursuit. Is it not? Sometimes coffee can be a little blurry. Sometimes going to church together can be a little. But like if a man is coming to your house, picking you up, standing at your doorstep, open in the car door for you, it's giving. I am pursuing you.

I don't think it gets any more clearer than that. Okay, let's see. Caroline says men. That's all she said. She goes, men. I said, what do you guys want to hear about on the men? Well, I think we kind of talked about that right now. Maybe that would be something fun to talk about with a man on the podcast.

We could bring a man on the podcast and we could talk about pursuit and what that would look like for like a mog, you know, like a man of God. The coming of Christ. Get ready, I would say. We need to be ready. Let's see. I'm just kidding, guys. I just, I think that's like probably a whole episode in itself. Healing from heartbreak. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Okay. So this is a very real. part of all of our lives is there is heartbreak, whether that is romantic, whether that is friendships, whether that is just maybe things that we hoped for that didn't work out. You know, heartbreak can come in multiple forms. It can come even through death and grief where our hearts are literally shattered. And that is just the reality of the world that we are living in right now. It is something that still happens to us Christians. Isn't that true? It doesn't just happen to the

world. It happens to all of us. We are not exempt from heartbreak. We are not exempt from pain. We're not exempt from grief. That is a very real part of our journeys here on earth. And it is something that we have to lean on the Lord through. I think that's obviously no brainers that through heartbreak, we have to lean on the Lord. But I think, you know, there's no specific timeline of how quickly you should be healing from heartbreak, especially if you have Jesus. I think it depends. It depends. on the situation. It depends on you. And it just depends on how deep that cut goes, you know, in your heart. I have, you know, just through my walk with Jesus, I've realized that there are even things that I thought I was healed from in certain heartbreaks that were still there. And it's so ugly and

honestly, so annoying for me sometimes where I'm like, wow, are you literally joking? This happened to me however long ago, it could even be years and these things will still bubble up and resurface that I thought were gone. I thought I was healed from. So I think first and foremost, in any heartbreak, I think something that's very necessary in healing is having grace for yourself through the healing process because not everyone's healing journey looks the same. And so if you see other people moving on quicker than you, even if it is your ex, even if it is your ex best friend, or, you, you know, you know, if it's situational with people and you're seeing the way they're moving on and you're like, okay, why am I not healed like that? You know? I think also we should take all of that with a grain of salt too. If this is just what you're going off of on social media, we've talked about this before.

We should take all social media with a grain of salt because, you know, people are only showing you what they're willing to show and there's a lot more behind the scenes that you are not seeing more than you think. So yes, of course, taking that with a grain of salt. But I think the most dangerous thing you could do, is compare your healing to someone else's. So grace for yourself in that healing is number one. And I think that just allowing yourself to feel, you know, I think that that is the best thing that's helped me in scenarios is I've wanted to suppress things and I've wanted to just move on.

I think also just out of me being impatient and not wanting to have to take forever to heal. I'm like, I just want to be healed in a moment and move on with my life. and that's just not the case always, especially if it was something like so painful, like if you were betrayed or cheated on, you know, that type of sin that's done to us is so hurtful. And it's not going to be a matter of a day or even weeks or months sometimes. It's like you just need to take it at the pace that your heart needs. And making sure that at that pace you're going, you're just holding hands with Jesus.

and you're allowing him in that healing. I think the only way that we can heal properly and effectively is inviting the ultimate healer in our healing. We won't heal the right way if we're not letting Jesus in. And I have seen that in my own life as well, where there have been situations where I definitely was denying and suppressing. And so with that also, I was denying and suppressing Jesus from my life. and we kind of had to go back and start back from when I stopped holding hands with him

because there's just no ground of healing that should be covered without walking with Jesus and letting him patch up those holes or cracks in our heart. Something that just came to my mind is this Japanese art form. I actually went on a retreat a couple years ago with Rare Beauty. We went to, was it down? or Houston, somewhere in Texas. And we went on this retreat for a few days to this resort. It was so beautiful.

And we did this exercise where we had bowls and we smashed them. And then from the pieces, we glued them all together, but we filled all the cracks of it with gold. So this Japanese art form called Kinsuki, where broken pottery pieces are repaired by gluing them back together with glue, essentially. that is dusted with gold powder, essentially highlighting the cracks with gold instead of trying to hide them, it translates to golden joinery in Japanese. The philosophy of this is that it actually is supposed to represent embracing imperfections and celebrates the history of an object by showcasing its cracks with gold, rather than attempting to make it look completely new again.

Broken pottery pieces are carefully fitted back together using a solid, special glue, then gold powder is applied to the cracks creating a visible golden seam. And the symbolism in this is the practice is often seen as a metaphor for healing and resilience where even something broken can be made beautiful and stronger through repair. That literally makes me want to cry. Ah, I love humans. It's so funny because even when we don't know Jesus personally, there's just this knowing in our hearts of what is right and this is just so right like this is so beautiful and it just really makes me think of

jesus like he really is the gold that fills in those cracks of our heart and when we're hurt and we're heartbroken and these awful things happen to us he allows it he even allows the breaking of the pot if that pot could also be represented as your heart he allows the breaking of your heart into a billion you know shattered pieces And we can sit there with all the broken pieces and think, how in the world can this even be my heart again? Like, how could this even be beautiful again? What is so beautiful for us to remember about Jesus is that he can do anything. He allows the shatter to happen so that he can mend our hearts together and actually make it even more beautiful than it was before by then filling all the little cracks and crevices of where it was broken with gold, which also,

probably makes it more valuable. If you think about gold, it's very valuable. He's not just filling it with, you know, rubber or something else. It's like he's making it more beautiful and more valuable. And I think the value in heartbreak is just the growth of our character. I think that's really when God can bring beauty out of ashes is from our brokenness. Our character is grown. Our faith is probably grown. We're probably a lot more stronger. You know, we can only become stronger through you know, heartbreak challenges, all of the things that feel so ouchy and icky as they're happening. But we do become stronger, especially if we're embracing Jesus, especially if we're embracing his healing, which is the gold in all of the cracks of our heart.

So ultimately, my advice would be that I think we should embrace the heartbreak. Embrace it. Feel it. Let yourself grieve and feel whatever it is that you need to feel. And embrace Jesus through that pain. extend grace and patience to yourself. And also, I think just always reminding yourself of the goodness of God and that it's not something that you need to feel defeated in. It's not something that you need to feel like you can't trust people. You know, I think sometimes when heartbreak happens to us or we're even betrayed by people, that's just an

example of heartbreak that we'll talk about right now, is it's very, very easy to feel like we have to then protect ourselves. Okay, now it's going back to a spirit of control where you want to protect yourself and you're like, I don't want this to happen anymore, so I'm not going to trust anyone. That isn't the answer either. It's not the answer for you to now isolate and feel as if you can't trust anyone ever again because that's not the truth. I think it's okay to want to give yourself a little break maybe, you know, especially if it's in the aspect of dating, if you're like, I don't know if I'm even in a place right now where I can trust. You know, you're not saying that you won't get to that place one day, but if you can't right now, that's okay. But I don't think we should

go to the other side of the spectrum where we are now fleeing from any opportunity to be loved or to have redemption. God loves redemption. He is a just God. He believes also in justice and what is right. And the justice for your life would be to have this part of your life redeemed. And you are in a beautiful friendship or relationship or whatever that looks like. You have to also open yourself up to a an opportunity for redemption to happen. And so if you're closing yourself off from everything, okay, yeah, maybe you are closing yourself to anything bad ever happening, but you're also closing yourself off from anything good happening as well.

And so that's when we really have to trust God in the scary things where you're like, all right, God, you know that this is an area of my life that has not been the best. And I've gotten really hurt in this way, in this area of my life. And so I really want to run away right now. And I don't want to ever date anyone again. I don't ever want to let anyone into my heart. I don't ever want to trust the church again, whatever that looks like. But as painful and as ouchy as it is, I'm just going to give it to you.

I'm just going to trust you. And I'm going to believe that you are my protector. And I'm going to believe that you are going to protect my heart with stepping back out in faith. And we're not going to flee in fear. That actually will be an act of faith by being like, okay, God, I'm just going to trust you this even though I'm really scared because I got really hurt last time but God I'm just going to abide by your spirit. I'm going to listen to your voice. I'm going to stay discerning and I'm not going to be paranoid and I'm not going to also run and try to protect myself. So those were my pieces of advice

today. This was kind of fun. I would love your feedback on the style of this episode because I know it was a little bit different. If you guys could give me any feedback anywhere. I don't know how you could do it. DMing on Instagram, comment section on YouTube, reviews, writing a review for the podcast, which, by the way, I haven't acknowledged that in a hot minute, but thank you all. I don't really look at them a lot because I just, I really try not to put any of my worth in this pod with, you know, that type of feedback and reviews. But oh my gosh, you guys, I looked the other day and I cannot believe all of the positive feedback and reviews for this podcast. Are you guys serious? Thank you. So even if it's through that, writing a five-star review for the pod, that really blesses me and is always so appreciated.

But I love you guys. I hope that this was kind of helpful. I put my counselor hat on today. But I love you guys. And I'm so proud of you. And I'm so proud of the way that you're pursuing the Lord. And you're also allowing him to pursue you. And thank you for being here.

Thank you for hanging out with me for another Friday. Also, can we do something cool today? Can we show somebody how cool Jesus is? Please. Can we do that? That would be so fun. I want every single one of us to commit to showing someone how cool Jesus is. Okay, I love y'all.

Have a beautiful weekend and a blessed, blessed week until I see you guys next time. I love you. I'll see you on Friday. Bye. Are some of y'all still listening? Okay, if you're still here, that means you're a real one, which is why I'm about to share this with you. If you've already caught up on all the episodes so far and you don't want to wait until next Friday for a new one, I have really good news for you. Subscribe to our Patreon to get early access to the episodes every week, early access to merch launches, or any other exciting news, and receive personalized, encouraging messages or Bible verses from us.

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