Circling Back - Bit Madness: The Final Four & Championship

Episode Date: March 30, 2022

It’s time — The Bit Madness Final Four and Championship match-ups are upon us. Will the Cosmo Bartender complete his Cinderella run? Does Tiny Dillon have enough might to overpower Giant KJ? Will 1940s Gangster Accents finally see its demise? That and more on today’s episode. Support us on Patreon and receive weekly episodes for as low $5 per month: www.patreon.com/circlingbackpodcast Purchase a Circling Back Candle: www.vellabox.com/circling-back Watch all of our full episodes on YouTube: www.youtube.com/washedmedia Shop Washed Merch: www.washedmedia.shop (0:00) Fun & Easy Banter (15:00) Aliens Living Among Us (35:00) Bit Madness: Final Four & Championship (1:01:57) This Weekend in Fun Support This Episode’s Sponsors Vizzy: www.vizzyhardseltzer.com/washed Sunday: www.getsunday.com/steam20 (20% off) Birddogs: www.birddogs.com (STEAM) --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/circling-back/message Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

all right we're back circling back podcast presented by busy hard seltzer the only hard seltzer with vitamin c and superfruit acerola. My name is Will DeFries. To my left, David Bing Bong Roth. Why is the thumbnail from yesterday's Coffee Tuesday me, Kevin McAllistering? Like, what is that? Did I do? Obviously, I didn't do that. You don't remember the part where you put on aftershave live on the podcast? Obviously, I did do that. You don't remember the part where you put on Aftershave live on the podcast?

That's me. That's my impression. That was good. Kevin McAllister. That was good. Randy, mark that down for today's thumbnail. Oh, man. It freaking burns. Shoot.

That's not what he said. The thing about that scene is that it should only really sting if he shaved. If you just put it on your skin, it's not going to sting that much. Right. Good point, man. Maybe he did shave. I mean, maybe. And I would opt for, like, a natural, like, astringent, like a witch hazel.

Oh, for sure. For sure. That'd be a banger for sure. Dude, what I'm wondering about home alone is like what does kevin's dad do for a living like that house is huge to bring all those family members to france for a trip to and live in that house like he must be doing well i still think he should have just called the cops and just ended the whole charade uh is kevin actually a psychopath he was enjoying that violence a little too much Right?

This would be the worst podcast That's the stream room It's just us reviewing movies like that Alright, now that we're done with Home Alone Let's go to our next segment Is a hot dog a sandwich? Dylan, let's have you weigh in first That's the same vibe for sure That's scripted circling back

Speaking of the aftershave scene I was putting deodorant on the other day Parks was with me And he asked for a little you give him a hit he went a little hit of it and he thought he was like so manly yeah he started flexing in front of the mirror i was like dude this is sick the the the big moments of like puberty and stuff like they were almost embarrassing for me because i was like i had hairy legs before my boys like all that kind of stuff but when i got to start using deodorant, I was loving it. I was proud to get hair under my arms for some reason.

Armpit hair is kind of a rite of passage. It's gross, but I felt manly when I had it. I was showing it off. Yeah, because you got testosterone flowing through. Yeah, it was sick. Toxic. Weren't you nine when you got armpit hair? No.

No, I wasn't. I definitely knew some dudes a couple guys who hit puberty like i mean like i feel like it was like 10 or 11 oh yeah like they're very good at sports like yeah up until they get to high school and then they level off yeah uh shout out to my aunt shelly uh december 31st 1999 she took me into my parents bathroom and said well we got to get rid of this uh wispy mustache you got going on about on your upper lip parks has a couple little uh a little stache hairs he tells me he has a mustache coming in he's real proud of it it's just like he's your little wispy boy little kid you know peach fuzz kind of yeah my

aunt just didn't want me going into the new millennium with with the peach fuzz on my upper lip did your real disservice that night why oh by taking away my mustache yeah i mean like did it need to be done yes yeah no and it was a it was a good domino to to fall because like it it made me start doing it regularly and i was too scared to take the initial dive alone and i needed someone to do it for me well the rumor the rumor amongst my friend circle and i feel like this is universal is like oh well like if you want your beard or mustache or sideburns to grow in just shave like every other day and like when you shave it it comes back in thicker and like we believe that and uh people still believe that dave the results did shock me are people still trying to pull that over on other people?

It's like an old wives' tale. Yeah. You shave, it doesn't grow back. No, it's not. It might grow in at a different angle, and it might grow in a little coarser. But I think the idea that it grows in thicker and more rapid is just not correct at all. Are you telling me you shave and new hair follicles will just generate? No, it doesn't work that way.

Man, I'd be shaving my head like every month. There you go. Because I'm losing my hair. Right. Damn, we're men in STEM right now. We're not. Should we have a Guys in STEM podcast on Patreon where we just have people send us scientific questions and we try to sort through them? Dave is actively trying to get the thumbnail over here for this episode.

Look at him. So ever since probably a month and a half ago, we decided to change up our thumbnails on YouTube over at youtube.com slash watch media. And it's just been an all out race to get the thumbnail image. Hold on. Don't J bone it, man.

Come on. Yeah. I'm going start jayboning at one at one point dylan got like five in a row and i had to call randy out i was like what's your deal like why are you just giving all the thumbnails to dylan the entire time they were sick i just did that when you can't you can't hit it don't surrender surrender, Cobra. Oh, that looked like something else. Yeah, it looked like you were getting top. Okay. Oh, he's thinking, man.

Yeah, there you go. He's a thinking man's broadcaster. You can intro me if you'd like. I did. I already did. Yeah, he kind of did. Yeah, I did during the, it's a hot dog, a sandwich segment. So I would like to announce that Dylan's pre-wedding fitness journey is well underway. Or as I like to call it, Operation Shreddy Weddy.

Okay. It's going. Okay. Hit the... Randy liked that. Hit the stair climber yesterday. He just absolutely got after it. Just an unknown amount of stories.

Just noodle legs at the end of it, man. Just sweating buckets. Cut of noodles. It was wild. Like penne? Just ramen. Lifton it, man. Just sweating buckets. Cut of noodles. It was wild. Like penne? Just ramen. Lipton. Top ramen.

James Lipton. Anyway, look out. Don't say Top Ramen. Look out, dude. What's wrong with that? I don't know. Look out, man. You'll only recognize me in three weeks.

You probably will. So since when Dave and I roll over to the hotel, like before the wedding, like normally this happens at like, you know, for the guys, it happens a little later in the afternoon, but you're kind of doing the morning wedding on that Sunday. The ceremony starts at 1030. I need y'all to be up early. Yeah. So like, are we going to be like, are we going to be just pounding whiskey beforehand?

Like in the hotel room? We're not going to be pounding. We're certainly not going to be pounding whiskey. Okay. But I would like to have like a cocktail. maybe a glass of champagne or two since it's so early thank you for bringing that up since it's so early you're all gonna have a big old cock they're announcing in a rooster there's a fucking early wedding i mean 10 30 it's not 6 a.m have you ever been to a sunrise wedding i have they stink what no that's

a thing uh yeah i went to one like on the hike and bike trail like overlooking the lake it was like 6 15 what are you doing i had a few tequila sunrises before wedding everyone everyone went home and took a nap and then the reception was like later that afternoon what the fuck i was like this is i mean i respect it because it's different but fuck all that i mean the bride had to start getting ready at like three o'clock d-man needs six plus hours yeah i i i have an old take that i'd like to expose myself for i used to be anti new year's eve weddings i'm all in on new year's yeah yeah that's like in my 20s hated them in my 30s they're the best thing dude the last one i went to i think it was probably four or five years ago and it was so fun.

It was just a built-in party on New Year's Eve where we all got to get dressed up. Like, I'm all in on it. I'm going to renew my vows on New Year's Eve this year. It's a great idea, man. Thank you. Didn't you have food poisoning that one New Year's and you had to renew your vows? I mean, probably. I'm doing a lot.

Probably. We can move on. There's probably been a... Actual podcast. I'm sorry. There's probably been a- Actual podcast. I'm sorry. There's probably been a New Year's Eve where I had a tum-tum issue. Definitely was for me. That sounds on brand for me.

Yeah, you got a bad tum-tum, man. We need to bring that back. Like, oh, that's on brand. Oh, yeah. Stay on brand. Like 2016 internet stuff. I'll miss those days. The internet was simpler back then.

All we cared about was going viral. Still do. Go viral today. Smack. As you guys know, yesterday was the fifth Tuesday of March, which means that we had no other choice but to do Coffee Tuesday on Patreon. No rundown, just vibes. Yeah.

It hit Diffie. Also, we're doing Worst Of next week for Patreon on Tuesday. We're doing voicemails tomorrow. DadPod's going to make a triumphant return when it's April. Go over there, check it out. Patreon.com slash Jerkling Back Podcast. Like I said, we're also doing voicemails tomorrow. Call in 888-618-4422.

Again, 888-618-4422. If you're sitting there and you're like, I just called that last week and it wasn't working. Again, 888-618-4422. If you're sitting there and you're like, that's not, I just called that like last week and it wasn't working. Well, guess what?

It's working now. Yeah, put the word out. We paid our bill. Yeah. Dylan called them and bitched them out. No,

we had a credit card that, it's not even expired. I don't know what happened. It probably got flagged for weird non-company expenditures. Oh,

really? The card was used at the vet clinic and suddenly they had to shut it down yeah they're like why is this media company buying dogs you don't buy dogs at the vet you probably could you've never offered someone money for their dog at the vet before yo that's a sick doberman how much it's like gonna set me back hey i'll even cover whatever that dog's in here for today yeah i'll sweeten it deal for you. I'll pay off the rest of that contract. Just get this dog out of here.

Yeah, what's good with that corgi over there, huh? Ping me the paperwork. Corgis are cute, man. They are. They're vicious little fucks. That's what I hear. Dude, the one at our last apartment, I mean, he was generally nice,

but when he got pissed off, he got pissed off. They're just a little moody yeah it was kind of weird the the owner the owner was very corgi like as well and she seemed she seemed to have the same temperament was she mad cute i mean she was not yeah kind of okay i don't know mad cute but she was cute okay yeah shots are the corgi or the owner both of them you know dogs tend to look like their owners or vice versa that's the thing people say and you look just like rain i feel like that's exactly i feel like no i don't do i look like rosie yeah honestly rosie kind of has like the the brown on the around the mouth and then i have a theory that everyone looks like a certain animal like there's a i'm a certain you are you're very beaver-like.

Can I be otter instead? I feel like Dave's more of an otter than you are. You're beef. Dave's not an otter. Dave's like a... Oh, I don't know, actually. Like they do kind of have like a little mustache kind of thing going on, Dave. You actually...

You might be an otter, my friend. What's Dylan? Dylan is a... a grackle. That's so rude. That's a trash bird. I didn't know what a grackle was until I moved to Austin. They're trash birds. They're fine.

A pigeon is the rat of the sky. No, bats are rats of the sky, dude. You've said this before and I've corrected you. Bats are definitely the rats of the sky. Bats are nocturnal, though. let's give you guava though what what i once i was playing a concert back in the day and a bat flew on stage and i grabbed it and i bit its head off when did this happen like the 80s oh man guava is a fruit i'm way that was right before we played crazy what are you talking about? What am I thinking of?

Guano is bad. Oh yeah, bat poop. Guano? I was going to say guavas. Yeah, that was way off. That'd be chill if baths were just rolling around giving you guavas. I might acquire one. They just bring you guavas. Yeah, that's kind of sweet.

Yeah, there's bat poop coffee. Go rate and review the podcast as well. We definitely have talked about this. We talked about cat poop coffee. Oh, and review the podcast as well we definitely have talked about this we talked about cat poop coffee oh we didn't do yeah we did that okay that poop coffee sounds like it would start another pandemic like i'm gonna stay away from that for a little bit just saying well didn't that dude eat that bat in china no i don't think that's how i don't think that's how it really started didn't you have to eat a bat for uh we should give our theories though nobody had to eat a whole thing give you an easton i ate a whole fish

tail and head included bones included yeah it's their money dylan doesn't realize that the metal bats they use in college baseball have been like taken down a notch so it's not like they can just hit piss missiles like they used to dylan doesn't realize that yeah you don't remember the gorilla ball era of the 90s molded by it of the 90s you see when guys were just like murdering it like it was like 28 to 14 was a normal score for a game they had to really dial it back they did it several times you don't know shit a bunch of uh UT players had their obligations fulfilled yesterday for their Snap Kitchen NIL deal. Oh, that's awesome.

Yeah, they were just all posting photos of their Snap Kitchen together. Is Snap Kitchen worth it? There's one right around the corner from you. I would say that if... It doesn't matter that I deleted Snap from my phone. If you didn't have time to go get your meals every day and you wanted to eat a healthy meal at the office and you ate at your desk, I would say maybe it's worth it then. But because you have time to go get food every day and you can kind of manipulate your schedule, I'm going to say that it's not worth it for you. You don't know me, boy.

Dude, they're expensive. I actually think they're best meal to their breakfast. Facts. Well, let me tell you this. They put off major $14 for one meal that's not really going to fill me up because it's like 400-calorie vibes. Yeah, they have different sizes, but to get the size that you would need, you're paying $14. Keep going. Early Grand X days, Rhino used to buy just loads of those Snap Kitchen breakfast ones. They're in all the time. I one like every morning for a year and there's one called i think a morning sunshine or something like that then he called them sun cheese and it was for some reason pretty funny to me sun cheese have you have you

had your sun she yet today pre-made breakfast sounds difficult to nail they're so then lunch or dinner they're good they're loaded with sausage egg and like maybe like a sweet potato they're good yeah i was i was fucking with those hashes for sure yeah is that part of your shreddy weddy diet maybe no you can't be eating sweet potatoes doing your shreddy weddy so i got a pump in this morning and i had a smoothie sweet potatoes are actually a great carb i had a smoothie will low glycemic index actually there's something in my brain that every time i hear the word smoothie, I think, and then me and mommy made a movie. Yeah, that's fair. You want to hop on my Shreddy Weddy routine with me?

I've already got something I'm doing. And it's honestly more for your after wedding. Uh-huh. Mexico. We can rebrand it to incorporate the Cabo part of it. Okay. I like Shreddy Weddy, though. Shreddy Weddy's pretty good, I got to tell you.

You should trademark that. Put it on some merch. Yeah. I'm doing my hard 35 before my Italy vacation. You told me about that. Yeah. It's usually a hard 75, but you doubted that. No, I'm doing 35.

You knocked 40 days off. And I'm also not doing any of the other stuff that hard 75 requires. Is that where you have to go to the park and read a book and then do a couple push-ups? Yeah, you have to do one indoor workout, one outdoor workout that hard hard 75 requires we have to like go to the park and read a book and then do like a couple push-ups yeah you have to do one indoor workout one outdoor workout hard 75 is ridiculous yeah no my my hard 35 is i should i just call it the soft 35 yeah it's my soft 35 consists of me doing 35 days in a row of 35 minute workouts on the peloton the hard 75 is 45 minutes of indoor workout 45 minutes of outdoor workout then you have to read like x amount of pages in like a self-help book or something

that's that's real yeah the pages the pages read is not enough for me like like it's like 10 pages which should take you all of less than 10 minutes this is 75 days straight by the way hard 75 rules well you're looking that up let me just note that me just note that this chapter of my life is called Soft 37. Okay, here it is. Here's the full thing. So you have to follow a diet. You get to pick the diet. That's your choice, dealer's choice there.

The 45-minute workouts was correct. Drink a gallon of water a day. That's easy. If you're not doing that already. And read 10 pages of nonfiction. That's soft. 10 pages. And you take a daily progress picture.

Who's reading nonfiction these days? There's too much bad shit going on in the world. Learn yourself. You don't have to post it, no. Nonfiction's for softies. I read nonfiction. Shut up. I'm going to read nonfiction.

I have an imagination. I'm Dave. Oh, I'm thinking fiction fiction i'm an idiot i fucked this up on twitter the other day too my brain flips my brain flips this is another left right it's a flippy yeah i don't know why i can't do with this dude it's operation shreddy wetty i told you guys like when the when the lady at the golf tournament when the lady at the golf tournament was telling us to move to our right to not get run over by a golf cart, like my brain shorted out. Yeah, you panicked. I had visions. You just stood still.

Which way? I almost just laid down so she could drive over me and I wouldn't get hurt. It is very odd that you still have trouble with that. I have trouble with all that stuff, man. You put non in front of a word and I start second guessing. I start flipping things. There should be a word for nonfiction i start second guessing i start flipping things there should be a word for non-fiction yeah just call it made up or just call it real yeah real like

there's fiction you know it's like saying stupid and non-stupid yeah say smart yeah there's a word for it yeah see this isn't on me like they're making it confusing by just doing that dumb people thank you for justifying my stupidity right now people in their books think they're all smart they're actually just dumb wouldn't that be different because it's stupid and adjective it is so it's non-fiction and fiction is it it's a fiction book sure the book is fiction bird dogs we're just hey we're just scratching the surface of this wormhole, baby. Wait till you see where it's popped. Don't scratch the surface of my wormhole, dog.

Let's hear from our friends over at Bird Dogs. You guys know these gym shorts? They're called gym shorts, but they don't need to be gym shorts. You can wear them pretty much anywhere and get that fit off. I've also launched Operation Find My Bird Dog Shorts that I'm devastated to have lost. Fritz is obsessed with it. I have a pair of tie-dyed bird dog shorts that are sitting in my closet, and Fritz is obsessed with them. He follows me into the closet, immediately grabs those shorts, and just starts playing with them.

Put them on him. Dude, I mean, I don't think they'd fit right now because I'm a size 34 waist. He's getting chonky. It's pretty on brand for him, though. Oh, very cool. Yeah, he was born on 420. It's a pretty on-brand for him, though. Oh, very cool.

Yeah, he was born on 420. These things have a built-in silky soft inner liner that never rides up. The best liner in the game. They do have the goaded liners. They do. There's no question. I don't hand out that title lightly. But their liners just are different.

They are, man. Go to birddogs.com, enter promo code CIRCLING, and they'll throw in a free Bird Dogs beanie. That's birddogs.com enter promo code circling and they'll throw in a free bird dogs beanie that's birddogs.com promo code circling and boom a free bird dogs beanie with your pair of bird dogs stay warm and comfortable in your bird dogs baby dave do we have aliens coming for our asses i thought we're gonna do the carol de la veen story yes well no you called her cara Devine earlier. I did. I'm unfamiliar with her work outside of just vibing.

That's how I know her now. Next to the mayor of New York. This website stinks, baby. Yeah, I'm not clicking the link. I think my- I'm not clicking the Daily Star. Just mad pop-ups. It's a pretty reputable source.

Oh, my God. He's a professor of history at Temple University specializing in ufology that's a thing and he's written several books on the subject of alien abductions you see where i'm going with this interviewing alleged survivors to gather and compare different testimony like what's going on here he's just being a professor that's what they do he's probably got tenure probably just sits in his office and just drinks coffee and farts and shit. He's just cooking in the lab, man. Yeah, he's in there just whipping up that work. Anyway, he is now kind of sounding the alarm. He is saying that aliens are abducting humans and living on Earth before a full-scale invasion.

So they're among us. Per Dr. David Jacobs, a professor of history at temple university again just resetting the story what evidence does this uh fella have he claims that by just make a claim like that well i i believe this claim i don't know if they're all going to take over and invade but i do think that we're living among aliens he has uh spoken to hundreds of people who claim to have been abducted. And he has done hypno, reverse hypnotherapy. I don't know what it's called. They try to get a memory, a suppressed memory out.

Is that where you put it down, flip it in, reverse it? No, it's just where you hang out with the boys drinking hypno. Oh, that sounds sick. I've never had hypno. I think I have. You hang out in your parents' garage drinking Hypno With your high school buddies What is Absinthe? Is it in the same family?

No I don't think so Absinthe is like the It's supposed to make you trip out a little bit You can only get this in the Netherlands You can literally get it I drank it in San Francisco recently What is Hypnotic? Hypnotic is that blue shit

It's just liquor That's sick though go recently what is hypnotic hypnotic is that blue that blue shit it's just liquor yeah it's just liquor yeah that's sick though i mean way back to the have you guys ever have you guys ever watched someone from afar and been like they might be aliens uh i've never had that thought but i've seen some some weird ass people walk around like how do you how do you get that weird sometimes i'll just be like one day i was waiting for a sandwich i ordered a sandwich for pickup and as we all know during covid like you could wait in your car and they'd bring it out to you and i was waiting one day and i saw a family walk into a restaurant and the family just had weird ass vibes alien vibes and everyone in the

family at no point did they ever not hold hands they weren't all holding hands together but someone in the family was holding hands with someone else in the family at all times. They were transferring energy to each other. I was just like, why? Your kids are old enough where you don't need to hold their hand at a restaurant. How old are we talking?

Like 12, at least. I'm like, it's fine if you're holding their hand while you're walking to the restaurant down the sidewalk, but once you get in the restaurant, do you need to hold hands the entire time you're in there? I just thought it was weird. I wanted to see their hands and see if they had, like, a diamond or, like, a...

Oh, they don't have diamond hands. They might. They might invest in crypto. 100%. But what if they had, like, some kind of gem or jewel in their hands and they were, like, touching them? And that's how they were staying alive. Yeah, maybe the gems were uncaught.

You gonna make a jewel pod joke you can i'd like you to seem like something you do i was i wasn't going there in my head should we do a pod where we it's called the jewel pod and we have to hit take a hit of the jewel before we can actually speak every time dude you know maybe it's a terrible idea i like it maybe if they dabble in jewels maybe they're just here to save our souls it's fair i don't want aliens fucking with my soul save your soul not how it goes how's it go oh yeah that's a jewel how does it go for real it's who will who will save dave so it's more of a rhetorical question though who will save that was bad that one was bad oh man the other ones were they were they were all pretty much the same they all sounded like shit beautiful well let me just say this this is where it gets a

little bit spooky hit that cum thunder will hit man. Professor went on to claim that he had spoken to huge numbers of abductees who had told him that in the future they would have a, quote, job to do. He explained when they get older, they will be required to stand on the corner of a street. There will be a large number of people running down the street, and your job is to say, hey, just keep moving. Everything will be OK. That's a very specific job that i feel like it doesn't require a lot of training no i could do that job right now like i don't even think you need to be like osha certified for that this dude um this dude's wacky he's a whack job he's a professor well they they had some nice graphics that they used in this column randy can you throw one of these on the screen yeah so they have a they have one of these aliens sitting

in a what appears to be a red velvet chair just drinking a cup of bing bong he's absolutely shredded he's not doing a very good job of like blending in look at his trap very very obviously an alien his trap game is stupid how do you think he takes his coffee he looks so good with a cardigan over those traps bing bong i will take one large venti bing bong please one single crumb of creamer why is he drinking coffee like that dude he's just had a long day of mind control and shit he needs to block it looks like he just got done meditating and he's like all right now it's time for the maybe maybe that's what what is bringing the aliens to Earth. We have just the dopest coffee down here.

They can't grow it up on their shit. They don't have that bat guava to poop. Yeah, they don't have bat guava. Bats don't bring them any guava. Bat eats the guava, then poops it out, and then we make dope coffee with it. Maybe their coffee beans are super mid. I think that tastes bad.

You know what I mean? The fact that the other image that they used for this column is getting overshadowed, it's unfortunate because they just have a dude. If you saw this dude at the coffee shop ordering a bing bong, you'd immediately be like, oh, that's an alien. Yeah, hey, man, your face is blue and it has a grid on it. You're doing a terrible job of disguising yourself, sir. I can't tell you whether or not these images are Photoshoppedped but if these are real images that they used for this column

specifically then i have no other choice but to say that yes aliens are living among us there's proof there's photographic proof right here do you think these are fiction or like non-fiction so are they real or are they non-fiction they real or are they not real real you guys need to can we just do a segment where you guys start giving me things like just two different things and i have to tell you what they are because i i've struggled with non-fiction and fiction so many times are you a yin or a yang guy i think i'm a i'm a yang guy his uh his the way that he positioned himself to get the trucker vote i really appreciated that yang gang he's of course referencing and of course the one thousand

dollars a month for everybody yeah that was basic income sounds crazy sick i'm in we're a decade away ubi yeah i call it ubi sorry i don't know why friday's dead he needs to come up with a better name than universal basic income like no one wants to be called you don't want your income basic basic income having ass like if he called him an ass. If he called them swaggy checks every month, like monthly swag checks, we'd all vote for him. People would just go buy Balenciaga slides and shit with them. It's not swag if everybody's getting the same check.

I want my check to be more baller than that. What if he called them drip dividends? We're all voting for Yang if we get drip dividends every single month honestly yeah if you brand it that way how do you vote against that drip it in double d's instead of ubi like yeah i think i think we have something here hey if you understand basic economics and have any issue with what was just said definitely email dylan at washmedia.com let them know exactly why i will delete your email before even opening it if there if there was anyone at grand x who was an alien living among us at the company who do

you think it would have been i have mine and i mean it in a good way you ready for it yeah rachel page why she might be an alien why because she's kind of just living in like her like she's like she's crafted an entire world around her she has like i i don't it's something i don't i don't really understand but i i think that in terms of like taking her content as far as she can possibly take it she's done as good a job as anybody at grand x has done of making a living out of it she's riding her own wave yeah and you have to respect that if she doesn't if she's not an alien, she definitely has alien friends

that are like dapping her up and stuff. I think the answer's obviously Dylan. That's true. Oh, we don't have a childhood. Yeah, that's it. I think maybe Jake Goldman would be a candidate. Oh.

Because he, you know, he has that like, that like Hyde Park, not Hyde Park, Highland Park way of speaking. He's trying to figure out how to talk. He knows how to talk.

He sounds like he's from Southern California and Highland Park at the same time, but he's from Florida. No, it's the Highland Park kids have adopted the Southern California speak. Is it because they're watching so much Kershaw? And it's not just Highland Park. No, you're right. It's here, man. It's freaking here. No, I don't know.

Jake is from Florida, though. If you compared Highland Park to Westlake, who's got the better athletes coming out of there? Ooh, I think Westlake has had more... Like Justin Tucker is like the best kicker ever. I think Westlake volume-wise, but I think Highland Park has the studs. Oh, wait a minute. Yeah, they got Stafford, Kershaw.

I don't know if you know that. They played together. Yeah. Westlake has Drew Brees. You hear about this guy? I mean, they got Brees. I mean, Foles. Foles won a Super Bowl, but Foles isn't exactly.

The best kicker. Brees and Stafford have the same number of Super Bowls. The best kicker of all time. People don't talk about that. Goated. Yeah, I would say Highland Park, but kicker of all time. People don't talk about that. Goated. Yeah, I would say Highland Park, but it's definitely a conversation now that I really think about it. I think they should give the Lions a little miniature Super Bowl trophy for Stafford's win. Because they don't win the Super Bowl without us trading Stafford to them.

I think we should get a little tiny guy. Jake's not going to be offended by what I said. I love Jake. He's not going to be offended by that, right? Oh, I'm sure he won't, man. I mean, he hosts a podcast with dan and uh rob i don't think that anything you said about jake right now is gonna make him more offended than anything that they've said to him i'm gonna text him after this i'm gonna say dude dylan was just don't fix your jake yeah he's always been really nice to me

big jake guy you just got a beer recently you got what we went got a beer recently oh that's awesome that's the end of the story we just went got a beer recently. Oh, that's awesome. That's the end of the story. We just went and got a beer. Wow, what happened next? He went to Jets and picked up a pizza and went home, and my Uber took 30 minutes, so I just sat there by myself. That's true story. It was real fun. It was fun. Who's your alien pick?

Dylan. Oh, yeah. Yeah. I forgot that. It might be. No, that's probably one of the better ones. I mean, I know it's like the obvious pick but i could you could convince me bae's an alien that she hasn't seen billy madison talk about not having a childhood what's her problem like i wasn't gonna say anything about

that she's a 10 but yeah she's never seen just one of the most iconic comedies of all time. She's a 10, but she only sprays Pepsi out of her nose when she laughs during movies. That's a weird one, man. That'd be tough. I'll try to get her to stop drinking Pepsi. Like, imagine your couch after watching, like, Dumb and Dumber. Pepsi is not great. Not a big Pepsi guy.

Not either, man. And when waiters are like, oh, no, we don't have coke we do a pepsi like well okay well it's completely different no thank you they're not that much different they're just sugar water they're different wild cherry pepsi is better than cherry coke oh people weren't ready for that that is a good people weren't ready for that we had that at subway i don't know if i've ever had wild i've ever had it's so good i don't know why it's different but it's different it is so good we're talking crystal pepsi uh sign me up i've still never had that i don't think it made its way up to northern michigan the distributors didn't have that up there it wasn't like better but uh it was clear so you feel like you were doing

something special and you know and you were you ever had cherry seven up yeah it's essentially just having like a shirley temple in a in a bottle so good anyway sunday sunday gotta get down on sunday it's hard to imagine but spring oh i was wondering where this pretty much here at this point you know it's been a it's been a quick winter oh it's hard to imagine, but spring? Oh, I was wondering where this was. It's pretty much here at this point, you know? It's been a quick winter. Oh, it's been 80s this week, dog. We are so close to feeling that soft grass under our feet, but we need first to get our lawn back. And thankfully, Sunday gets your lawn growing

and helps keep it healthy all season long. My dormant grass is starting to bust. It's looking good. Last night, we didn't get a ton of rain, but we got enough. It's looking green. I'm feeling very good about it a ton of rain, but we got enough. It's looking green. I'm feeling very good about it. Thank you, Sunday, for helping me through the process.

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Let's have a lawn off. Okay. I might have one right now. I can show you. right we'll see let me see it we'll see about it do you want to see it the only way that i'll the only way that i rate lawns is whether or not it's going to feel good under my toes now you can't actually see boy you want a nice stick boy don't you but you can't see my son i got my toes in the lawn i don't have a follow-up to that like toes in the sand yeah i was trying to

shout out to jimmy buffett and Zach Brown and the rest of the band. They make it easy. They give you the plan. You can send your soil in. They'll tell you like, oh, you need this, this, and this. I used to try to do this myself before Sunday, like look up what I need to be laying down. Total beating.

Total beating. They spell it out for you. You had like a whole lab with like Bunsen burners and stuff in your garage at the Swing Academy. I was trying to make my own nitrogen. Harder thaning Academy. I was trying to make my own nitrogen. Harder than it sounds. You're trying to make your own nitrogen. Correct.

Particle divider. Damn. Oh, particle dividers divide particles. Right. These dudes over here are splitting atoms and shit. Yeah. Yeah. Splitting atoms.

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It goes like this. Da da da da da da. It's the final bit day. I'm very sorry. Da da da da da. I thought you were going to do One Shining Moment, but that's a little bit harder to do. I dated a girl whose uncle did One Shining Moment. Wait, why did I know that?

Because I've told you that before. Yeah. She always brings it before yeah she always brings it up she always brings it up hey what's she doing he had to got paid on that i think he did yeah her uncle her uncle uh i think wrote or whatever one shining moment you better be getting that mailbox money i think he might be i mean i don't know i've never i never met him was her last name barrett yeah his name's david bar Yeah. He's the writer of One Shining Moment. On the song's origins, Luther Vandross and...

Oh, there's a link. Hey, we have a David and a Barrett in Washington. I want some Marvin Gaye. Some Luther Vandross. A little Anita. Gonna set this party on fire. Dude, you sound just like Jamie Foxx. Could it be? Could it be? Could it be?

This is the worst thing you've ever done. This is the worst one minute of audio. Tell me that didn't sound just like him. Except maybe a little bit better. That was a fun part of the doctor.

A little Anita. I don't understand how Kanye got so many, I mean, I know that he was producing for Jay-Z and he was on Rockefeller and stuff like that,

but like Jamie Foxx wasn't some small get at that time. Like that was a big deal to go over to his house and record in his studio was that before or after ray i think it had i think it was before he was still a big party i fry ray came out in 2004 so it probably they were kind of similar like ray was probably in like post-production when he was doing that i'm making

that up i don't know the actual time he was in post you're saying yeah he was doing that. I'm making that up. I don't know the actual timeline. He was in post, you're saying? Yeah, he was in post. You know how it is. Man, Ray Charles, very talented. You want to do the shit now or what? Yeah, let's do the final four. Bit madness, baby. Say it with your chest, man.

No, you're right. He was very talented. Yeah. I agree. It's like your Elton John is underrated. he's under underrated take when did you have that take people don't appreciate a year ago i know i i just feel like he's he's properly rated as one of the goats no no are you gonna try to catch any of his like farewell tour i've been seeing people going to the shows and i'm a little bummed that i didn't make this happen i don't know i've seen

him twice don't don't don't do out like that he had to delay this happen. I don't know. I've seen him twice. Don't do Elton like that. He had to delay this one. What did Dave say? He'll do another one in two years. Wow, dude. So you're saying he's a liar? Him and George Strait. Wow, dude. And the who? I thought you drafted him

in your high school friend's death draft this year. No, we stopped doing that. Don't do that to Elton. No, I'm just... That's my dog, man. No, if anything, I'm saying he's going to be able

to perform in two years. That's my dog. That's a positive. Oh, yeah. He's your dog. If anything, I'm saying he's going to be able to perform in two years. That's my dog. That's a positive. Oh, yeah. He's your dog. Name five songs. Dude, he can straight up just tickle the ivory. All right.

Who's up? They used to call me Elton John back in the day. Really? Why? I don't know. I used to wear bedazzled suits to school every day in high school. Benny and the Jets. I want to keep singing until we go.

Until we go. All right. Our first matchup in the final four, the Mizzen and Main Bracket Champion 1940s Gangster Accents versus the champion of the Vizzy Bracket, Tiny Dylan and Giant KJ. Talk about some heavy hitters, man. Do we have a time? Do we actually know which episode we did the 1940s gangster voices in first because i would like to see i would like to see the first

ever time we did that he told me four years ago i'd believe it you could i think my guess is nine months ago i was i would say you could tell me it was in the last 18 months and i would i would believe that i think about nine months it feels like less than a year i still do it i don't even do it just on the podcast this is something i do around the house normally i still don't know why they speak that way i want to just i want a theory like why did how did that happen i don't know like vocal fry of today how did how did they speak like in the 1800s like did they have a different way of speaking then i think there's like hey what y'all want to go get some coffee some you know read the newspaper and shit i think i i truly think that it is the uh roaring 20s i think everybody was just doing they didn't realize how bad cocaine was for you they're just doing

blow making money bootlegging and shit going to the speakeasies and everybody was hopped up to talk that was the era amphetamines just maybe some opium too like liquor you know it's buying off the back of trucks and shit you guys have seen the movie lawless with uh shyla buff and uh tom hardy story of alexa highly recommend watching if you're if you're into dudes running liquor illegally and you're into dudes with big traps wearing cardigans like i referenced earlier that's already yeah tom hardy his cardigan game and his trap game in that movie is stupid i don't know if he just got done doing like warrior or something before he started taping but he's absolutely he he went shreddy wetty hey these actors who are like oh i want to get ready for a role and they'll like get down to go from like 28 to 4% body fat in like 16 days. Randy just texted me and he said this was around March 19th, 2021,

when we first did the first ever 1940s gangster. We invented it. Was this because it was happened shortly thereafter when you worked here, Randy? It was our first ever Tik TOK. Randy's got underrated knowledge of this company. Yeah. Randy knows more about us than we know about ourselves.

He really does. No, but really, how do these actors do it, man? I know they have like a trainer and nutrition and all that shit, but they do it so fast. Steroids, trainer, nutrition. They do roids? You could get absolutely disgustingly shredded in a month. That's such a short amount of time.

Yeah, it's probably not healthy to put that kind of mass on. Tom Hardy, I feel like, is naturally a bigger dude. Yeah, I think he's just one of those naturally hot big dudes. Look at Efron in Baywatch, you know? Don't mind if I do. Don't mind if I do. He was too shredded. And I know he was already a pretty lean, muscular guy, but my goodness.

He's the kind of shredded that I would never want to be because if you eat like one thing of fries one night, you're going to notice it. It's going to tank you. I was trying to find. I saw an Instagram the other day from Rob. How do you say it? Who's the dude from Always Sunny? I don't know how to say his last name. Sure.

And he pretty much like he posted remember when he was like out of shape and then he got absolutely jacked for that season of always sunny he put he's like i don't understand why everyone does this and then he went through his entire routine of just like having the studio pay for someone to cook all of his meals and train them every day stuff like that yeah it's like no that's just what they do yeah whenever people are like oh my god like they're in such great shape it's like well yeah dude like yeah men's health like every other men's health because i used to be a subscriber was like jim from the office like his transition to becoming a navy seal and it would be like this spread and like the exercise he did i'm like you know they're

not talking about the oh i don't know't know, the HGH, the trainer, as well as the nutritionist. Like, yeah, I'm sure he's really going through this workout and that's how he did it in six weeks. Hey, so I have a question. Your men's health comment kind of made me wonder about this. So I think that my neighbor, I think her and her boyfriend have broken up, but he's still getting golf digest to our apartment. Those are years now.

Yeah. How long until I, how, like, how long do I have to let the let the breakup you know simmer for before i can start stealing those golf digests wait are they addressed to him or her uh him and they're just sitting in front of her door they're they're sitting in our mail room because he doesn't have a mailbox so they just they're just sitting on a table and i'm like are they living together i guess that's weird to just have your golf digest delivered to your uh if they're just sitting there, they're yours. I think it's mine now. Yeah.

Just like the jet ski. I think the guy was also a chotch bag. You know, Golf Digest is my number one plane hard reading material. I have officially, I've retired from buying magazines at the airport. Just doing mental swing reps. 100%. 30 feet. I love getting another swing thought in my head for the upcoming trip.

Yeah. I just refuse it seems like they could if if everyone's golf swing was just like if if everyone wants the perfect golf swing don't they just need to release one edition of the golf digest to like show everyone what to do platinum edition and it's in like a it's in like a ziploc bag why do they sell play why do they sell playboys and stuff at airports? Do they still do that? They used to sell them and have the covered up plastic wrap on them. I was always like, what psycho is buying a playboy

in the airport? Who's opening this on a plane? You can just look at porn on your phone now. Yeah, don't be a weirdo. Look at porn on your phone and play. I like to read the articles. No, you don't. There's actually some pretty good journalism done there.

Remember when they decided to stop going nude? Idiot. Yeah, I think they doubled back on that one. I know. Like, well, we should probably go nude again. That's always the right choice. Do you think you'll get any Playgirl offers once Shreddy Weddy season?

I hope so. I'll pose nude. You won't even send feet pics to people. You're not going to pose nude. Yeah, if I get paid. Didn't they also send a pretty rocking cease and desist or demand letter over to Grandex early on? Grandex had to write a very big check to Playboy.

Why? Oh, because they used photos from shoots or something? And it was an article I didn't write, but I approved. This was before we had the, let's be careful what images we put on the site. Wild West, Will. It was. And so there was a girl who was... You don't want to see my hand where my hip

be at? It was like a sorority girl. Chris Rock didn't want to see his hand where his hip be at either. Sorry. We're topical. Anyway, it doesn't matter. I remember. I know on WordPress we could see who published and who approved these columns. Did it all trick trickle down to you i'll tell you i know exactly who wrote it yeah you don't have to add don't add them i'm not i know who wrote it he doesn't he's in care i'm sure he wouldn't care but uh yeah they they initially demanded like 85k per image

which was going to set us back like a cool million that's excessive and then we uh negotiated it i say we. I had no part of the negotiation. My grand ex negotiated that down. This is before my time. I would have just gotten us out of it personally. Dave, from a legal standpoint, if you go to them and you're like, guys, we're a small company and we fucked up. Do you think that they'd be nicer to you at all or are they just like, nah, fuck you?

Yeah. Well, I think at that point, their business model was failing because failing because again people can just watch porn on their phone yeah so they're just firing these out they saw yeah they hire these these law firms or collections agencies that all they do is go try to protect your image rights and they search they do the reverse google search they try to find anybody who's posted them on a blog without licensing it and then next thing you know you're getting that letter and you're negotiating we that's a pretty frequent thing we had to do but um 85k per image it was something like asinine like that i did we we literally can't pay yeah we can't do that sir we can go to court and you can spend money on

lawyers or we can just pay you like five grand per hour which is still a fucking lot i don't even know what no it's still ridiculous i think we settled for like 60 something k all that all that to say uh tiny dylan big kj goes through for death are you kidding me that's not why would i joke you're voting against gangsters voices y'all two can he's having them sleep what are you doing doing? You guys can put me in my place. Well, you know who I'm voting for. I'm 40s gangster voices all the way. This is hard. This is hard. No, it's not.

This is hard because I get a lot of enjoyment out of doing 1940s gangster accents. I also get a lot of enjoyment every time I see... That was a very fleeting, fun part of our history. It was here and it was gone. I just want to look at it. Yeah, if Randy can pull up the image, that might help me make my decision right now it was fleeting it was short and we laughed at it and we moved on i and like look we we learned if you listen

to too much dip the other day kj's uh moving to to wisconsin and like i just feel like it's only right that he makes a run like this that's fair this is kind of his cinderella story right now it's his one shining moment it's not he's one giant shining moment you're so tiny yeah it's photoshop no it's not how is that photoshop how is that photoshop because if this were to actual scale i would weigh about one-eighth of what kj weighs and that is just simply not accurate he played college football like yeah he's gonna be bigger than you i don't know why you're upset over it kj is a large man like don't get me wrong but he's he's not he's not 180 pounds larger than i am dude that's more than that that's like a different and this was also perfect because it happened

right around the time when uh biden met jimmy carter and just absolutely dwarfed him the way i'm looking up you're the jimmy carter of this situation a one-term president dylan that's all i would want if i was president i don't think i'd run for re-election especially if i was in my 70s don't spend i don't want to spend the last decent years of my life the corner of his laptop is missing no that's just a glitch on the camera is hovering that's just a glitch yeah he's gotta he's gotta get some stuff on that sticker because if the sticker's just hanging out there there's gonna get a bunch of dust and hair on it is there anything worse than hair on the a sticker the sticky side there are a few things that are worse literally nothing literally do i just throw the sticker out or do i peel it

off i'll throw something worse out uh the holocaust war famine no but dude but homeless no but when your sticker gets a little dust and hair on it it's like fuck what am i supposed to do now i hate hair it's gross yeah oh i hate hair uh so much so that I'm losing my own. How come hair on the head isn't gross, but when it falls off, it's like... If it's in my food, you better... You know what's weird? You better look out. What I have to say, this is psychotic what I'm about to say. Will still has to vote.

I am more likely to continue to eat my meal if I find one of Randy's hairs, which happens quite frequently in it, as opposed to a miscellaneous human hair. I'm numb to it at this point unless it's a long hair because if it's not a long hair i have to assume it's from me i'm a hairy boy and with that being said uh i'm not sending i'm not sending tiny dylan through instead i'm mainly sending giant kj through to the Oh, no way! It's big boy season. Wee!

What? That's in the championship? You heard him. Y'all have a handshake agreement before we do these. No, we don't! That's why El Glissadente won last year, which is bullshit. Are you kidding? Randy is the one who made that win.

That won last year because of the... I don't think Gliss Adente would have won last year if it wasn't for the Photoshopped image of you at the podium as a hot dog. Look at me. That honestly did it. Look me in the eye when I ask you this question. What? Answer honestly.

Okay. I'm going to read you. Do you guys have a handshake agreement before these tournaments start? No. You don't have to keep calling it a handshake agreement. Absolutely not. Absolutely not. David?

No. David? I've not discussed this outside of – Why aren't you looking at it? I handshake. Absolutely not. Absolutely not. David? No. David? I've not discussed this outside of... Why aren't you looking at it? I'll say this. I'll say this. Last year, there might have been a tacit understanding last year that I was not going to vote against Al Glyzidente.

That is not the case this year. Like, number three, Tiny Dillon and Giant KJ is not guaranteed to win at this point. We have a lot going on. If y'all vote for that over either cosmo bartender or what's the damage i know that there's some shady under the table shit going on okay the winner of the liquid iv part of the bracket is cosmo bartender i could have used a couple liquid ivs after i met him that was that was my my hungover day in vegas number one seed in the bird dogs bracket what's the damage that was your hungover day well no in vegas in vegas number one seed in the bird dogs bracket what's the damage that was your hungover day well

no in vegas in vegas in vegas no sunday was sunday sunday monday and tuesday were my non-vegas hungover days oh boy no i never mind just let's go number two cosmo bartender versus number one seed what's the damage i'm gonna go first here because this is an easy one for me. As much as I enjoy asking what the damage is numerous times an episode, the Cosmo Bartender, he really hit his stride at the correct time. He won his conference tournament and was like, nope, this is me. Yeah, they're shooting like 65% from three in the tournament. Like they just absolutely, everything's going in.

Oh, it's two Firehouse subs. I think he sold them. I just think that's, you got to point that out. Dave, no need to vote on this one because Cosmo Bartender is absolutely going through. I would have voted for Cosmo. You follow me? Hey, do the people get... Who's winning amongst the listeners?

Not sure yet. I haven't been keeping track. What? The bracket name that is currently winning is called Dylan is a Wine Mom. What? I don't get it. You do like a fat glass of red. Oh, yeah.

But I'm not a mom. I love moms, but I'm not one. Sometimes I wonder. Do you put... you have you have you what is i've never heard that i know you have a baseball game tonight why are you roast handing me i don't my son your son does thumbnail he's thumbnail chasing i'm not thumbnail chasing do you have you been to a any of his games yet with a cocktail no okay just making sure no no no why not but i am working the concession stand tonight oh you're gonna smuggle some glizzies out of there do we have to go are you hitting a hot dogs do they serve hot dogs there i don't know if they have hot dogs i don't think so i

think it's all um i don't think they have anything to cook with in there it's just all like can we go to his game tonight snacks yeah let's just. Let's just show up. Where's it at? Harrington Park? Northwest Little League. I probably shouldn't have said that. It's okay. You're going to get listeners out in the outfield yelling Chili Dog. Chili Dog. Parks.

That'd be kind of funny, honestly. Chili Dog. Come on, Chili Dog. He's got some confidence. He's going to smack the ball around the yard today, man. Check it out. They're using those aluminum bats, right? Aluminium.

They don't use wood bats. They're six and seven. Why not? They're not starting to break them. What's the difference at this point? What's the difference? Weight, mostly. It's hard to get that wood bat around. What are wood bats made out of?

Oak? Wood. Makes sense. They're different. They're different. Do different hitters have different like woods or is it is there is there one that is like a blanket normal bat for a major league major league ball players get to design their bats and they're a few different wood options

to choose from yes um i don't know the most common probably is oak i know that uh barry bonds i believe used a maple bat, which is more rare. Okay. You know, that's why I got kicked off the high school baseball team. Why? They said I could never play UIL because I was using a California red bat. Really? Yeah. We actually went out and cut one down, which is illegal.

It's also weird because in high school, you don't use wood bats. I did. Really? If you wanted to, could you? In high school? They called me Woody. I don't think so. If you were just like, no, I need to use a wood bat. I did. Really? If you wanted to, could you? In high school? They called me Woody. I don't think so. If you were just like, no, I need to use a wood bat. No, you could.

A dude at Dunnville did. That's such a hard-o move. He was doing it as a bit. I'm sure the coach loved that. He wasn't serious. He never made... I don't think he ever made the 4C team. Maple, Ash is another one.

Birch, Bamboo? No. I'm seeing Bam bamboo as well. That's kind of chill. We're probably looking at the same thing. I'm only a bamboo bat guy. I knew that ash was another common one. You can kiss my ash.

Types of... Anyway, we don't have to keep going down this... Toast your glass to girls with class. I always say that. Man, it's actually a felony to cut down a a california redwood that's why you got kicked out because you're a felon they didn't press no yeah well they didn't press charges they made me go back i had to plant a bunch of seeds across the country they're calling me davy apple seed dude i'm sure those trees will grow back in the next 200 years were you planting

apple trees or redwoods they're calling will Willie Apple G'd because it's a GDI. That's good. That is good. That's good. Stupid. Who won? Cosmo? Okay. And we get to pick the winner now? The Bit Madness champion. Championship round. We got the number

three seed. Tiny Dylan, Giant KJ versus number two cosmo bartender how scared is dylan right now 64 bits two left you follow me i feel like some people are going to be unhappy either way yeah i mean that's how it is no there's always going to be a bunch of fans that leave unhappy from any championship game david that's a great i mean that's honestly the realest thing you've ever said thank you who wants to vote first i don't want the onus oh i'll go okay oh god i know

cosmo bartender was it's it's a inside joke i mean this is how a lot of bits start that we brought to the pod and that we i think to this day we are the only people who have experienced listen to the show tiny dylan giant kj was something that everyone experienced at some like they realized wow this is a thing we put it out there on social. I'm seeing something special, you know. This is a two versus a three. And because I think I know how at least one of you is going to vote, I want to make it interesting.

And for me, personally, the one that I have gotten the most joy out of, even though I often walk around my house talking in such a manner. Tiny Dylan goes through. There's no way. There's no way what you just said was sincere. Dylan's a scared boy. And genuine. There's no way.

I don't like the way that you intimidated the other teams in the tunnel after the final four matchups. I'm going to join it out of a Photoshop picture of KJ and me over how much fun we've had with the Cosmo bartender. It's pretty funny, and it's not arguably not Photoshop. It's like, it's slightly humorous and like, okay, you move on with your day. Dylan's like the bad guy at the end of Teen Wolf when Michael J. Fox is taking the free throw and he's standing under the hoop. They just let him stand right there and stare him down.

Look how big my Yeti is. Isn't it weird how he tried to intimidate me after the last round? It's a 100-ounce Yeti. The way that he stared me in the eyes, I feel like I was kind of violated there. What do you got, Dylan? Oh, you want donuts on Will? I'm just asking a question.

Do I need to vote? You know it's Cosmo Bartender. I decided before this tournament I was going to vote it all the way to the championship. That's how much I'm, I'm into it. Yeah. I didn't even notice how big your Yeti was in that photo. The microphone's as big as my head.

Dude, someone must have photoshopped the Yeti. Oh yeah. That's weird, man. Somebody really went all out. Yeah. Why'd they photoshop the Yeti and like compromise the rest of the photo?

Is the onus on me? You know, it know it's though you know the onus is on you when it feels good i love having it all over me well as much as i love both of these and i don't think either of these are going anywhere if anything i think we need to start using the tiny dylan giant kj graphic more that's how i'm gonna remember kj when he's in madisonville madison no madison madisonville is that what they call part of it or something madison i don't know man the cosmo bartender i have to admit it my memory of him is kind of fuzzy i i i hung out with him for a long time uh but it was after our serving us he was serving us drinks, getting us twisted, having a good time. I do have some beef with the Cosmo bartender as he wouldn't start a tab.

He would only charge you $17 per cocktail and then hand your card back. That was part of the fun. That was a little frustrating. That being said, Cosmo bartender is the Bit Madness champion of this year. Let's go. Let's go. I would love to make Dylan miserable by, again, having him be the butt of a giant joke. What a great friend you are.

You want to make me miserable. Yeah. But I can't vote against the hottest hand in the game right now, which is the man himself who owns two Firehouse subs. Maybe he sold them. He's seen numerous women's under stuff because he's just very proud of that fact about himself. Oh, I missed that. Oh, you missed that? He's a little pervy.

Thousands of women have flashed their downstairs at him. Oh, yes, yes, yes. At the bar. That's a thing that happens typically to bartenders. Right. Maybe once some crazy night, thousands. I can go on record right now saying that I have never had that happen to me. Never.

Not once. Not once. What about Firehouse Soaps? It didn't happen at the harbour point golf club either didn't happen to singular wireless either really you didn't just have like just girls coming in just loving it it's time baby wow we gotta talk air church people are mad this weekend and fun presented by busy hey you guys you guys enjoy good vibes i love immaculate vibes only what does a good vibe mean to you guys oh just good good people good energy you know just walking into the garage to the fridge that's

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Must be 21 or older. Dylan, what are you doing this weekend? Thank you for asking, Will. Yeah, although tonight is not the weekend. I got Parks' baseball game, which I'm very excited about. I will have to watch it, however, from the concession stand out beyond left field. That's a bummer. I'm volunteering.

I'll still see plenty of action, I'm sure. You got Binox? No Binox. I'll be fine. A telescope? I have good eyesight. Yeah. Friday, it's going to be a low-key evening.

Brittany and I both have the kids that night. Maybe watch a movie, something low-key like that. Maybe go to dinner somewhere. I don't really know. Saturday, big day. Lil' Bay is turning five. And Lil' Bay has a birthday party. It's going to be pretty similar to the one that Parks had at our house.

It will be at our house, bouncy house situation. It's going to be fun. Cannot wait for that. I think you guys are even invited. We'll find out in a couple of minutes if you're actually going to attend or not, I guess. It's going to be a good weekend, man. Sunday's wide open. Got no parks that day. If y'all want to vibe with me Sunday. I might be a good weekend, man. Sunday's wide open. No parks that day.

If y'all want to vibe with me Sunday. I might be able to vibe on Sunday. Maybe drink a Vizzy with me. I'll be down for that. Maybe hang out in Dave's garage. Will's pool. I don't know. I'll say this. My pool is very cold right now. Maybe hang out in our new office as we get to move in on Friday.

I'm not going to just go hang out in an empty office all weekend. That'd be weird. But the option will be available to us. Maybe go spend the night there and make sure it's not haunted. We can play a roller hockey game in there. Ooh, I hope it is haunted. It'd make for good content. That'd be tight.

Dave, tell me I'm wrong. Wouldn't be great for our lease. It just depends if it's benevolent or not. Could be a friendly ghost. Could be. And that concludes my weekend. What's Davey getting into just staring at my soul i thought you were gonna start talking about your weekend dog i got news well there's not much to talk about makes sense but i had to change my plans i was going to this eric church concert he canceled it so he could go watch his beloved

unc tar heels did he go to unc or is he just a Tar Heels fan? I don't know. That changes things for me. It does, but it's also Carolina Duke, so I kind of get where he's coming from. People are mad, but I'm not that mad. I was going to go to his show. I've been a big Eric Church fan since he was selling sectionals from Rooms to Go,

his Eric Church collection. Carolina Duke sounds like a girl that's out of my league that went to like clemson or something oh it's pretty good that is good there's got to be a carolina duke out there for sure absolutely yeah that's a house divided that named it that daughter that we really don't have much planned at all i've been uh i'm working on my working on my game trying to get it ready to bring to a course to not embarrass myself. So I'll probably get out to Gray Rock, hit off the mats, because that's usually what you do when you go out there. I have not received an invitation to this party. I checked the mail yesterday.

This one should have been virtual. Ooh, an e-vite, a classic e-vite. Facebook or nah? We don't do Facebook, David. I don't think I got it. I'm sure you're invited. I might be watching the Valero. Texas Open?

I got to see who's playing. I got to see who's hitting the ball well. We've got the Masters the week after. Of course, home of Kevin Naas. What is that, a 14? Is that where he did that? Yeah. Na, na, na, na, na, na, na.

Na. Make him say, ah. Okay. Ah. Na, na, na. Kevin Na. Will, just go ahead and give us your weekend, please. You know, I'm not sure what I'm doing this weekend.

These last two weekends have been very Will heavy in the DeFries household. Yeah, a couple weekends ago, I played golf twice. Doing that with an 11-month-old, These last two weekends have been very will heavy in the DeVries household. Yeah. A couple weekends ago, I played golf twice. Doing that with an 11-month-old, it's going to put you up against the wall a little bit. And last weekend, I had a family member in town, so I totally took over that weekend as well. You played all your fun cards at this point. This weekend is weekend of Sally.

I'm just going to follow her around like a little lap dog. I will say, as I missed the homie's birthday for covid purposes i didn't want to spread covid at your son's birthday we appreciate that yeah unless i get covid between now and saturday i will probably be attending uh little bay's birthday party that'd be great man i'm gonna be i'm gonna get this absolutely twisted you should we're gonna have some adult bevvies there dave i've got an update it was not a 14 it was a 16 good for him 16 it was shockingly worse yeah i hit into the woods it wasn't did not take a drop you just uh played it out of there been there facts hero shots

that's it i don't have much else much else. Not a lot of footy. Very cool. In the pipeline for me. Okay. We'll see. Well, everyone have a safe and fun weekend. You don't even mean that. I lied.

I do have footy this weekend. I'm a straight liar. What time's the birthday party on Saturday? 11.30. Perfect. Right when Manchester United game starts. Can we put that on the Outdoor TV? Please say yes.

Well, I got to run that by bank. I'll give you my Peacock login. Oh, dude, I'm good. Do we have F1? We shouldn't. Three in a row would be pretty aggressive. Yeah, that'd be a lot. We got Australia in April.il oh down under okay bye