Circling Back - Coffee Friday 014: Choppin' It Up LIVE

Episode Date: September 6, 2024

A little special Friday Morning Live for you fine folks. Enjoy a free one-week trial on Patreon for additional weekly episodes: www.patreon.com/circlingbackpodcast Watch all of our full episodes on our new YouTube channel: www.youtube.com/circlingback  Shop Washed Merch: www.washedmedia.shop  Support This Episode’s Sponsors Rhoback: https://rhoback.com/ (BACKER20 for 20% off) Squarespace: https://www.squarespace.com/steam (STEAM for 10% off your purchase of a website or domain) Bourbon & Beyond: https://bourbonandbeyond.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Coffee's for closes only. You think I'm fucking with you? I am not fucking with you. I am, I am, I am, I am not fucking with you. Coffee's for closes only. Cl-cl-cl-cl-closes only. Coffee's for closes only. I'm Kajak.

I'm Sham. Bebop. Welcome to another Coffee Friday. I don't even know what number this is. Do you guys? 14. Coffee Friday 14, baby. My name's Will DeFries in the studio with me.

My absolute boy, Dave Ruff. No, no, no. My numbers don't reflect that, Randy. What he said I think is incorrect. I've got Coffee Friday number 79. Just saying, we've got coffee Friday number 79. Just saying we've done a lot of these. I don't know who's keeping track here. Hey, really looking forward to the show.

Can you edit that original part out, Randy? Yeah, edit this stuff out. Actually, no, this is live, so we can't edit it out. Who are these young ladies that have been hitting the TL? They're tennis wags. So I think it's tonight or tomorrow. It's like the first all USA men's semi-final in a while. Tiaffo.

And as I think, I could be wrong. I think the one in the white is dating Taylor Fritz. I'm not really sure. The Fritz man? Fritz man, dude, Fritzy. Dylan Shivery. I was gonna talk about how the humidity is gonna lift this week and I'm really gonna come alive but Randy there's a I'm sorry I want to pop that thing on your head so bad. It's just it's staring at me. That's such an asshole. Oh come on dude. What a weird

thing to do live. Come on. I'm sorry. We're going to go live to a million people and you're going to talk about that? It's so ready. Anyway, I'm sorry. That's not how we need to start this thing. That might be the first time you've crossed the line. That's not a line cross. No, that's a line cross.

We all get pimples. I get them. I'm a classic. The second I have it, I try to get that thing popped. Oh, me too. Me too. I know you're not supposed to do that, but like, I'm not even thinking about it. I go straight in. I'm sorry, Randy. You look very-

Apology not accepted. You look very handsome. Go pop it on Dylan. You look very handsome. As always. Am I, Dave, what's in that cup of yours? Do you really want to know? Yeah.

This is actually just straight bourbon. Oh, okay. Oh shit. I'm going to try this. Do you It bites a little bit, but it's got like a nice candy aftertaste. This is filled with Irish coffee. Why are you guys drinking? It's literally 1006 AM. It's coffee Friday. I have a drinking problem. Avery Tomasko said Saturday afternoon, central Texas will feel like an entirely different planet with the humidity dropping. Dude, I'm so ready. Look, I'm an Avery Tomasko guy.

That's my go-to weather guy here in town. It's just not going to feel like a different planet. I will. Now this is big weather to a T. Have you ever seen something more big weather than saying that we're going to be on an entirely different planet on Saturday afternoon? I bet I'm sweating outside on Saturday afternoon. That first fall front, it lifts the humidity and is sneaky, one of the best things about the fall. Right, but there's plenty of places on this planet that feel like that currently.

No, there's not. I don't know. It's going to be like, wow, where am I? I guess I can't really say because I've never been to another planet. It's true. Yeah. Except for the one time I let Will make a bud brownies in college and he made the butter and he put way too much weed in it. And I didn't know and I ate like four of them and then Betty Boop jumped off the wall and ran out of bed. What planet were you on? Hard to say. When I got my wisdom teeth taken out, a friend of mine brought me some butter that was infused with marijuana and I thought I was supposed to use all the butter.

Don't do it. And so I used all the butter and put it on some mashed potatoes for a player. Fuck yeah. It ruined the next 36 hours of my life. Wait, how many pranies did you have Dave? Actual brownies. Did you say four?

I it's, I don't know, but I did have more and I wasn't a weed guy and I didn't really, nobody told, we weren't prepared for it. They weren't like, Hey, be careful. Cause you're eating this, you know, not only is it homemade, but it homemade, but you're eating it, so it's gonna hit you different. I didn't know that. I've gotten reality becomes cartoony high once before, and it was shocking. That was a hallucination.

That's the only time I've full on hallucinated. I had to ask my mom to sit down with me and watch a presidential debate with me because I was freaking out so bad. What year? I don't know. 2004. You watched a presidential high? Why would you do that? Presidential debate? You got to watch the presidential debate. Come on. That'd be very existential to me. Wait, did she know you were? No, I didn't tell her. I think she thought I was just like on the

painkillers they gave me. But I was, my biggest concern was getting dry sockets because you know how you get cotton mouth? So I thought I was going to get dry sockets and have to go in and get like stuff done. And so I was just like in a bad place for so long. Yeah, that, I think I've told the story that one affected me for a long time for probably at least two years. If I smelled weed, my body would have like a visceral reaction and I would get adrenaline and like almost panic attack. It was very bad. Dillon doesn't, he wouldn't do that because the sugar in the brownies is just simply too much. Yeah, the sugar is, it's just, it's not worth, the juice isn't worth the squeeze for me. Will, what are you saying? You're on my screen. It looks like it, I've been informed that the Rizzler is related to the Costco guys.

I still am not positive that he is, but it looks like they're like, are they about to break down a wall with them? This is when they use the Rizzler as a battering ram. At Sally Slices. Yeah, save Sally Slices, they defeat the mafiosos. I was hoping we would get some more Costco guys content during this episode.

There's some big news about our boy Timon. Dude, I know. Let's go out this weekend. There's a crazy event happening. If you want to go to Timon's profile, he posted a reel about 40 minutes ago and he officially has braids. It appears as though he has gone on spring break in Mexico. Pretty sick if you ask me. I don't see any sunburns in the parts of his hair, but it doesn't seem ideal either way. He's kind of good looking.

Yeah, he's a good looking dude. Yeah, and he's jacked. Yeah, I mean, honestly, I just don't know if he needed the braids. I'm not going to act up, but I could see how I might act up. Bro, let's go out. Can I say something about Timon? What's with dudes on Twitter, like quote tweeting like a good looking girl and being like, can how it might act. Bro, let's go out. Can I say something about Timon? What's with dudes on Twitter, like quote tweeting like a good looking girl and being like,

can I say something? Okay. Yeah, I mean, like we get it. She's hot. We're all thinking the same thing. Yeah. Oh, those are, those are a braid braids. I'll throw this up for the folks at home.

I wasn't kidding around, dude. He's got a crazy event this weekend and he is showing up absolutely flossing to it. He doesn't go to the crazy events. Did he need the extensions? Like he has long enough braids with his normal hair. I just don't know if he needed the extensions. Bro, let's stay in this weekend. What happens if this dude shows up as a bombshell on Love Island just with the braids?

I don't know if he's going to be really sought after with that look. I don't know. Or maybe he is. He's an edgy guy with big muscles and tats who just stays in on the weekend. Is he... Okay. I'm trying to think of what level of appropriation we're at here. This isn't the final boss. I wasn't going to go there, but someone might have a problem with it. Yeah. Yeah.

I think he could be doing worse, but I also don't think that he's putting himself in a position to defend himself well. He's appropriating, um, Texas state sorority girls, like circa like 2004, 2000 through 2008, cause I had a number in my class that would go to like Cancun or Cabo and come back with that. One that we both know actually. Really? Yeah. We'll talk off mic. Can't wait. I might just grow the mullet out and get braids. A braided mullet. I don't think I've ever seen that. A brullet? Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Yeah.

We can see your comments, by the way. Randy has displayed them on the screen in front of us. So we see everything you're saying. It's a little distracting, but I kind of love it. Y'all ever been to Jamaica? If your comments are good enough, we'll talk about them. I'd go to Jamaica. Of course I would go to Jamaica.

Closest place I've been is the Bahamas, cultural-wise. I went to the Virgin Islands, which I heard they named after you. Hey, I went there and everybody knew you. I had a son. I fed sex exactly one time and got a son out of it. It was great. I have a absolute glugger right now. What's in there? A busy cold brew, B-I-Z-Z-Y. Oh.

You guys freak with this stuff? I don't know about it. It's pretty good. They sell it at H-E-B. It's the largest container of cold brew you can buy from them. I did something weird earlier. I went to go top myself off with some more cold brew.

You can do that. And don't be gross. And I accidentally just grabbed the milk out of the fridge and just filled like a bunch with milk. So it's extra milky today for all my beta males out there. Devin's got a good point. That's not triggering your gluten. Yeah, Devin doesn't have a good point.

Devin has a good point. Dylan has motion today, he said. You don't. Are you serious? What's that T-shirt? You get that from Micah? That's a tiny T. We've talked about this before.

Is this a tiny T? It's a tiny T. I mean, it's a short. The sleeves are a little short, but it's's a tiny tee. We've talked about this before. It's a tiny tee. It's a tiny tee. I mean, it's a short. The sleeves are a little short, but it's not a tiny tee. It fits. Okay. I'm going to rip the pocket off that later. Please don't do that. Why?

One of the funnier things you could do. I told you about the time I did it to a kid in high school. That's fucked up. We were, okay, it was an undershirt, to be fair. We were, it was baseball and we were in the weight room. And I was just giving him a hard time. And I said, I said, say I won't. I put my fingers inside his pocket. And he goes, you won't. And I ripped it and it ripped the

whole not just a pocket shirt, the whole shirt like almost in two. Did you buy him a new one? I said, Man, I'm really sorry. Like you probably want to punch me right now. He didn't. He took it pretty well. But I felt terrible about it. It was an undershirt. It wasn't I feel like you didn't. He took it pretty well, but I felt terrible about it. It was an undershirt. It wasn't. I feel like you didn't feel bad. I did. High school, high school, you did. I legitimately felt

bad. I feel more bad. I want to go find this guy and shake his hand and be like, dude, I'm really sorry. Dylan did that. I know he was younger than me too. It was a whole thing. One of the best fights I've seen in high school. I saw in high school, excuse me, was over an undershirt weightlifting class guy got there and Didn't bring like a workout shirt. So he went into his friends acquaintances locker and got his undershirt and

Used it and the guy got the class late and saw he was using it next thing you know, they got into a huge fight and it ended with coach Anderson shout out to him winner of the Calpatty classic at least four times, tackling the bigger dude and holding him down. And while he was like trying to break it up, holding the guy just got like three or four free licks in. So it ended up being like horrible that the coach got involved.

That's not good. Not good at all. I was at a baseball game recently and this dude in the row in front of me was trying to fight me. And I was just, I started going like this to him. Yeah. I was just dodging. Yeah.

You look good for a minute. And then what happened? He pissed me off. Yeah, he got you. Yeah, he absolutely pissed me. Is that why your shirt was covered in blood that day? Yeah, I was hoping you guys would think it was tie dye and I was at a dead show.

What do you blame that loss on? Was it the fact that like you decided to throw zero punches? Yeah. What was that guy doing? Like it was just eating. You just eating punch. So cocky to enter a fisticuffs with someone and simply throw zero punches and just be like, no, I'm going to Muhammad Ali this guy entire mile. You didn't even try to block them. You just take it. You can do that when there's someone who's about to break it up and you know it. But when you're kind of there at the game and you know like, no, this is going to go on for at least three minutes, you got to throw some kind of defense. The most embarrassing thing the guy

did was give up the higher ground and lose. Like losing when you're a row up is so embarrassing. Yeah. He set back higher ground for like many, many years. High ground, you have no excuses, man. No. Unless you're like, well, I didn't throw a single punch that's why I didn't beat him up like that's a decent excuse like why are you doing that? This episode doesn't end until my bing bong is gone. Randy can you set up a can you set up like an AI thing that shows the level of my coffee live for everybody? It's at like 96% right now. It's over Anakin. I have the high ground. I saw a villa in Lake Como, Randy, where they filmed Star Wars. There's like a popular meme of guys taking their girls

to like scenic places in Star Wars. Like she thinks that we're going on a romantic trip. The real reason we're here. And it's like a picture of definitely from a scene from Star Wars. The tour guide told us, he was like, yeah, no, a bunch of movies have been filmed here. He's like James Bond. And I was like, yeah, that makes sense.

Then he goes Star Wars. And I was like, what? Why does Star Wars need a baller lake? It was because that's when Anakin was falling in love with Padme and turning to dark side. I get it. I turned to the dark side for Natalie Portman. Pretty pivotal in the lore. I always just say Princess Leia, where are you tonight?

Okay. And who's laying there by your side? It's a Blink-O-Nade 2 reference, Dylan. You understand that, right? You wanna borrow my Dude Ranch CD? You didn't have to point that out, I already knew that. Thank you Cheyenne for the compliment, I agree. For those of you who wanna wear Coffee Fridays,

no rundown, just vibes. But we do have a friend that we want to talk about today. Can we hear from our friends over at Squarespace? Yeah. Today's episode is sponsored by Squarespace. We love Squarespace. It's the all-in-one website platform for entrepreneurs to stand out and succeed online. Whether you're just starting out or managing a growing brand, Squarespace makes it easy to create a beautiful website, engage with your audience, and sell anything from products to content to time

all in one place, all on your terms. The second you sign up for a little trial on Squarespace, you can just see how nice it is. It's so easy to manipulate the website and make it look exactly how you want. They got a million different templates. Pretty much every font they offer, make sure that your website has absolute drip.

We did a Squarespace read while you were out of town, and I said, it's a real shame that Will's not here to do this. He's their number one fan. He's been using them longer than I think anybody. I'll be honest, like whenever people talk about building a website, I just look at them and I'm like, they're like, yeah, I gotta go hire someone to like get a website for this.

And I'm like, just go to Squarespace. Just go to Squarespace. Go to Squarespace. You can build a website. You can build your audience on it. You can save all the emails from your audience. You can collect emails, send out emails to everybody. You can blog on it. You can host, you can put your audience. You can collect emails, send out emails to everybody. You can blog on it.

You can host, you can put your podcast up on there if you want to. You can do everything on there. It's a beautiful, beautiful service and they would just make everything easy. Head over to squarespace.com. Try your free trial. When you're ready to launch, go to squarespace.com slash

steam to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. I ride for Squarespace because they ride for us. I've been using it for over 10 years. I love it. Jordan Wells. Yes. That's exactly what happened.

That's exactly what happened. Exactly what happened Jordan. Yeah. Brett famously is a grind boy Which like you can't get mad you can't get mad at your sales guy for being an absolute grinder But when you request to not have ads on labor day and then you have to make up for it on friday It doesn't really feel the same. Yeah to be fair a few weeks ago I don't even think you guys were in the office. He goes can we make up an episode like the week of labor day?

Because we have extra ads. I was like, you know what? Yeah. Yeah. So he did at least run it past me and only me, but that is exactly what happened. I think the issue is that in the 2023 calendar, we put in big bold, do not sell ads on these days. And I don't think that was the case for the 2024 calendar. Before I left, someone made a joke about Labor Day. And then Brett was like, wait, are we coming in on Labor Day? And I was like, no, no, we're not. It's called Labor Day, dude.

It's kind of the thing. It's one of the two days that isn't like Christmas or Thanksgiving where like we just straight up don't come in because we're normal. Also, Will's in Italy. Va bene. Sure. He was clearly in Italy. Prego. Wasn't a joke. Va bene. Sure. He was clearly in Italy. Prego. Wasn't a joke.

Prego. I played my Zocchard last night. Oh shit. Yeah. It was kind of a reckless decision. We got the Via 313 normal pizza, like not Detroit style. Okay. It's like a tavern style, right?

Yeah. Why would you do that? Because my son, I don't think his mouth can fit over the pieces of Detroit style. Oh yeah. I don't think three-year-olds vibe with Detroit style pizza that much. Fair. Their sauce is pretty spicy too. And I know that because my son doesn't like spice too much. So he's not a big via guy. Kyle?

Just wanted to point that out. And why do via when you could, you know, it's got all the baggage when you could just go to Jen's. Well, okay. Sally last night was like gonna get it from Domino's, just get thin crust Domino's for the Fritzman. And I was fine with that. Like I'm not a Domino's guy, more of a Pizza Hut guy.

Everyone knows that. And I said I wanted red onion on the pizza and because Domino's doesn't offer red onion on pizzas, they just do white onion. Is that weird? I don't know. You know, I don't really, my palette doesn't really care either way.

It's the standard. I don't think I've ever seen red onion. Red onion on pizza is so far superior to white onion on pizza. If anyone wants to fight about this, I would love to, but. I would love to get into like a food argument that gets way too tense. Hey Dylan, is chili a soup?

I don't really have like a take. No. I'm not against red onion. I wanna get out in front of it. See, the best way to do red onion is to have it as thinly sliced as possible. You get that mandolin out. This is the way.

You can see through it. The mandolin. It doesn't look like that burger on Twitter that shows up at like every week that looks like Steve Harvey. Okay. You've seen that one? I have.

It's a cheeseburger that looks like Steve Harvey. Since we're roasting bread, when Brett does that, does he get out his Mondo land? That's good. That's good. I'm fun here folks. We're live by the way, if you like live comedy, check me out I'll be at the fun Factory next week two dates opening up for Matt Reif You're really big on this Matt Reif opening is the fun place an actual place It should be you it probably is if it was an actual place I was gonna say,

you know a lot of comedy clubs for someone who allegedly does not do drop-ins, like open mic nights. That's what they call my garage, the Fun Factory. Go in there, there's a bunch of shit, some boxes, we need to like break down and recycle. But then- There's fun shit to do. There's a TV, service suspect, Coleman cooler you can sit on, it's great.

I've been there. Help the uh grill, build the grill. You did. Yeah. Can I say something? This is uh the podcast that you're one of the hosts. So yeah. Now, you have to interject. There you go. We're here so you can talk.

Let's hear it. I want it to be known that I'm a ball knower. Wow. Okay. Yesterday, yesterday on Dylan's track house live stream, I said, Xavier Worthy, start the man. He's getting two Tuddy's. So surely Dave started him, right? Obviously, I think that Dave started him. Since friend and ball knower, Will DeFree said, hey, he's gonna get two Tuds. People don't like that I know ball but I know

ball, you know? Look, ultimately it was my decision. So how many points did he get you? The buck stops here. The friend of the show, and a DraftKings contributor, I'm adding him, Boiky Locks is like, "'Dave, here's why.'" And he gave me like some good reasoning

and I love good reasoning. And I was like, you know what, you're right. Did he pull like historical data? Dude, he went, yeah, he gave me everything. He's like, this is why it's a bad matchup. Traditionally, the Raven secondary, blah, blah, blah. I sat him and on that reverse, his first touch of his career was so sick. I'm just watching it and as soon as he turned the corner, I knew, I was like, well, here's six. Yeah.

At that point, I was just hoping for it. I was like, yep, keep going. That play was so sick. It was so well blocked. So two of his three touches were touchdowns. Yeah. I did say he was going to go for 118 yards. So I guess I was incorrect about that.

It's not smart to just not cover him when he runs a route. That's what we call busted coverage. Completely busted. And he made a path. Happy for him. Can I be a co-owner? Do you guys have punishments in your leagues? We have stuck with the loser caddies for the winner. We do it like around the golf before every draft and we've been doing that for the last like three years. Okay. Okay.

That's one of ours, although you can get out of it by posting a no context shirtless selfie on Facebook, making it your profile pic. You can't be like, I lost a bet. It's just, you got to go on there. Even if you haven't used Facebook in 10 years, you just got to go post it. I mean, and that was my idea. I got to say, and I'm pretty proud of it because it just makes me laugh. Has anyone done it? No one's done it. The closest I think was noted New York Times bestselling author, W.I. Ball. Like what if your handicaps at a 10.1 and you're like desperate to get under 10 and you're like, okay, I just, I'm going to post this

mirror selfie because I don't know if I'm going to get on the course again. I think I'd do that. Yeah. I don't think I would do it. There's nothing worse like worth that. Cause then you've got like fringe family, you know, that you haven't seen in a long time and they're like,

did you see Dave? Oh shit, Dave's lost his mind. Yeah. It's tough. Look at, Croy Martini. Well, you did some good yesterday. You talked Croy into getting some points. Good, good.

I'm the new Matthew Barry. Come to me with your fantasy picks. I'm gonna do what Big Cat does on Sunday mornings and ask people, start cinnamon vice. Rest in peace by the way. Who? Big Cat does on Sunday mornings and ask people start cinnamon vice rest in peace by the way who big cat Matthew Perry oh you know a lot of stories about the ketamine Queen is that what they're calling them there that's what they're calling the person who supplied the ketamine that killed him ah yeah yeah just don't do ketamine in the hot tub.

Yeah. Rest in peace, Matthew Perry. Y'all hear about the dumb zone, fantasy football punishment. Loser has to do a five minute set at Addison improv. Ooh, I'm glad you brought that up. That's good. That's good. Shout out to my dumb fucks. I'm trying to think who's built for that.

We did that once in my league. Loser had to do a five minute stand up. Like open mic? Yeah. Travis Dowerpul. He did it? He did it. I feel like he'd be good at it though.

He held his own. Do you try to come up with a tight five beforehand? Yeah. Oh yeah. Well, I feel like that could stress you out more if you just go abroad. It's like well All right I'm just gonna this gonna be the worst five minutes of my life bombing but like at least I know I didn't put effort into

It because what if you what if like I spent, you know 20 hours putting together a tight five and then suddenly I get up there and it bombs and I'm like, oh well, okay I this sucks people. I think the audience appreciates the effort You start working the crowd. You can't confront that it's a fantasy football punishment though, right? That should be one of the rules. That should be, yeah. So I assume with Jake and Dan's deal, that's not an open mic. That's like if it's the Addison improv, they're probably getting like an actual slot before like an opening act type deal.

So that's, that sounds awful. Truly. I didn't even know Addison Rae did improv. Okay. Okay. She's brat. Yeah. Unfortunately, when I saw Addison,

the first thing I thought was Addison Rae too. I'm so TikTok coded. Well, yeah, you are. How many followers you got on TikTok? 8,000 something. I thought you had like 9,400 or something. No. Go viral again.

Okay. How do you get written up in all like Daily Mail and New York Times, all this stuff, you don't have over 10K? Traditional media. Are they not linking to your profile? I don't know. Are they not embedding? It's a failing New York Times.

They just guess they're suppressing me now. I feel like the typical New York Times reader isn't just jumping over to TikTok and hitting that follow. Yeah. They linked to the Sunday Scariest page when I did the interview the other day and I don't think there was a noticeable bump.

Like it wasn't like, oh man, this is crazy. Yeah. Speaking of noticeable bumps. Come on, man. You gonna call out Randy again? Man, I do feel a little bit bad about it. It's so messed up. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that.

I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that.

I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that.

I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that's true. You did think that? Do you have any dates this weekend? Nope. Okay. Get one of those little patches that makes it

disappear. Have y'all seen the tool that you can use? Oh, I used to have one. I like the little. I love to see them live. Yeah. A little circle. Yeah. They work. I don't like it, dude. That thing hurts. Randy, I'm gonna give you the the keys

of the castle and I didn't realize this until I was older. Warm. Okay, get a washcloth. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Go warm. Hold hold it on there, moist and warm for a few minutes. Alternate, ice cold rag, hold it on there. Promise you. Really? Promise you. Don't try to pop it, definitely don't pick at it.

Do that, if you do that for long enough, it'll be gone in a day. It'll still be a little red, but it won't be as bulbous. You're still voluminous. You're still scrumdiddly umptious. He's just trying to make up for it. Yeah, you're really trying to fail him, man. I gas you up all the time, Randy. I've never heard him gas me up once. I call you handsome all the time. He's a good looking guy. He does have a lot of HR violations regarding your backside.

Exactly. And then I report them to him and then guess what? They're on there because it's him. They're currently under review. We'll get back to you soon. When y'all were at BMW and I was just alone in the office, I did get a chuckle when I walked over and saw a sticky note on Dylan's desk from Randy that just said, HR complaint. Dylan has been objectifying my juicy ass.

Yeah, it's under review, like I said. As a guy who struggled with skin issues in high school, I, man, that would devastate me. I would have left the lunchroom. I was pimply growing up, for sure. I had them right here on my nose or down here. And then I didn't have a bed anywhere else, except I would get, I didn't have back knee, but I would get zits on my back. Oh, I had zits on my back. Did you, one day I was wearing a white t-shirt in like eighth grade and I popped one, like underneath it and it bled. And then like a girl called me out for it and I was just like, okay. Oh, sorry. I got stabbed. Yeah. Sorry. Sorry. You're calling out my gunshot wound.

The ones on your back, you could get those ones that were deep and when you would go back and like you'd feel it and it'd be like that. Oh, dude, I still I mean, I still get them. The back ones. Yeah. It's a killer, man. Thought they'd go away when I turned 30 and here I am at 40. I still got to stop washing my face, dude. You still got high T. Hell, yeah. Dave. Fuck yeah, dude. Why are you all washing your faces?

You're just training your face to be dirty. Nah me, I keep a layer of dirt on there, I never get zits. That is crazy, you don't wash your face. I've washed my face like once this year. That's so weird. And it's cause I was at a hotel and they had like face wash in the shower and I was like, well I got time.

I'm an oily boy, I have to wash man. Okay Leo. What? I too struggle with skin flute issues. Okay. You get sits down there? That would stink. Did you guys see the chiefs of hall that got sentenced?

No, for what was it? 17 and a half years armed robbery. Damn. I don't know, a lot of people are making jokes, but as somebody who struggled with chiefs of hall for many years, I just don't think it's funny. Whose arms did he steal? Not my homes, right?

No, he still has both of them. Chief Sahalik. He was addicted to the Chief Sahalik. You think he got to follow the game last night? He probably found out. Some of them. They got internet in jail, right? Are there prison fantasy leagues?

Dude, you gotta think. Yeah, it's different though. But they trade cigarettes and shit. Yeah, you don't want that punishment. You think he was in the hole? And like, you know, he had been out in days. And then all of a sudden, he like something like slid under the door.

He's like, hey, Jesus, hold it. And they could slid it under and he looked and it just had the final score and it like got him going. He's like, yeah, thank God. Something to get him through the day. Yeah, he's made that. That's a nice story. Other than the 17 and a half years in prison.

Yeah, what did he do? Arm robbery. He stole arms. He fucked with the wrong arms dealer and they called the cops They didn't realize that the Russian arms dealer. He was robbing was a narc. Now. He pulled a Thule out Taylor's Taylor didn't step in I Don't like she has the jurisdiction so she was going Taylor Swift can get someone out of jail She was going denim last night Kim Kardashian does that? Mm-hmm a week

Are people talking about how Casey kind of brought denim back into the fold? I don't think so. Taylor Swift looked phenomenal last night. I'll be bold enough to say it. Okay, relax. She looked phenomenal. Relax.

She's not dressing for the male gaze, Dylan. Maybe the hottest she's looked. She's just going to a football game, trying to support her boyfriend. Just one man's opinion. Kind of getting to the time for old Trav here, about to be a year into this relationship. And you know how celebrity couples move pretty quickly.

Trav's new haircut, it's not doing it for him. Are you kidding? I think he's never looked better. No, it's not working. I think he looks great. He's got the low skin fade and then the hair's just coming straight down. It looks like an 80.

Their arrangement's about to come to an end. It doesn't matter. You think the year contract is up? Yeah. I would believe that it was a somewhat manufactured relationship that turned into an actual relationship. It's either gonna end this year,

it's either gonna be forever or it's gonna go down in flames. I think it's true love. All right, that's good. That's not. Gonna be forever. You guys wanna do a worst of story? It's a news story.

We had a couple worst of stories, but I'll be honest, I didn't think they were good enough to center an entire episode around. If you do have a worst of story, send it'll be honest. I didn't think they were good enough to center an entire episode around. If you do have a worst of story, send it to worstofatwashmedia.com. If it's college tailgate, like we can approve that right away. If that comes across my desk, I'm stamping that with approval and we are going. Oh, yeah. Thank you. Mickey Mendoza makes a good point.

Mayor Morris put it best. If you like it, you should put a ring on it. Thank you, Mickey. Las Vegas, Nevada. Been there. It's where worst of stories begin most of the time. Uh, August 27th, a woman named Patricia Sierra. Did she trip over a cactus leaving the hotel? 47 years old.

Speaking of. Did she trip over a cactus leaving the hotel? 47 years old. Speaking of. She broke into the affordable cremation and burial funeral home on West Charleston Boulevard. What could she possibly be doing? Have you guys ever broken in anywhere while drunk? No. No. There was this time I was filling my car with gas and it was late at night and the people who were closing the store forgot to lock up. And I walked in and there were no one was working in the convenience store. And I was like, man, I could really do some damage in here. But I left.

Did they have any taquitos rolling? I took exactly one taquito and left. Nice. Yeah. I had a similar thing, but it wasn't actually me. I had to commit some light vandalism to prevent something. It was outside of this place in New York city, Duncan's Toy Chest.

Okay. And these guys, I got wind that they were going to go in there and they were going to bust the joint off. Oh my God. Steal all the money and all that money that they made that night, Christmas Eve was going to go to charity for kids, for the kids at the hospital, weirdly across the street. Oh my God. Steal all the money and all that money that they made that night, Christmas Eve was going to go to charity for kids, for the kids at the hospital, weirdly across the street. Oh my God. And they were going to steal it? Yeah. These guys were bad dudes. These guys are sticky, the stickiest.

Oh, fuck. And just borderline wet. And I was waiting for them. And once they got in there, I got my camera, I snapped a pic, and then I had to throw a brick through the window and set off the alarms. So no, to answer your question, no, but you prevented in a way. Yes. That's that's a good deed, man. Correct. I have a similar story. I actually drove my car through the front of a storefront, but my car was shaped a hot dog. And we were in like, there's all this like nice clothing. And I thought I was safe that no one knows me

but I forgot I was wearing a hot dog costume and they kind of knew immediately it was me. Wasn't it also a Luby's? It was also a Luby's. Colby asked me what I did at the gas pump. I just filled my car up. Really? You sure?

Nothing else. I broke, my buddies and I broke into an old fort. It's now like a tourist attraction. It's like three in the morning. We were celebrating the Red Wings, you know, in the playoffs, having a good time. And we decided to take all the firewood in the fort and we just spelled out, go Red Wings, and just left.

That's sick. And we were like, what do you think they thought the next morning they walked in? There were they like, oh, someone came in and did this. Like we didn't do anything bad. Some kind of vandals. I'm pretty sure it's like government owned land at this point.

So if we would have gotten caught, I think we would have gotten in some pretty big trouble. But you know, it was pretty innocent to just like, just do that. Anyway. Back to Vegas. Surveillance footage showed a woman breaking through a window and unlocking the front door before proceeding to enter the property's viewing room and wheel a coffin outside. She apparently dumped the body in the coffin outside the funeral home and after that,

she left the coffin and fled the crime scene. Can you imagine she claims... So, okay, around 330 a.m. 911 received a report of a body lying in front of the affordable cremation and burial. Authorities rushed to the scene and identified the deceased remains. They learned that the body had arrived at the funeral home a week earlier and they had a viewing before being stolen and thrown outside. There wasn't an empty coffin she could have stolen. She claims that she remembers absolutely none of it. Oh my God.

She didn't even steal it. She on Ambien? I think she was drunk, David. I think she was on that Hennessy. Damn. She's gone off the Henny. What if she was gone off that hip now? That's some weird drunk behavior to break into a

like cremation place. That's enough to like, What did you come to at that point? And you're like, hold on, am I, what's going on? Can I say something? It's a podcast Dave, yeah. I get that like the idea behind this, this particular burial place is that it's like affordable,

but the name, the name just feels a little cheap. And I guess that's the idea, but the affordable cremation and burial. Well, is that, is it worse than the place in, what's the Texas coast town I went to? Galveston. Galveston. Headstone World? Headstone World. Really. Headstone world. Headstone world. Really?

Headstone world. Yeah. Welcome to the world of headstones. Yeah, it's a bit cheery for what you're there to purchase. They have like a Willy Wonka figurehead who like comes out and like, yeah, actually. Come along, look around, I'll find out what you're going to be buried next to. That's good. It's pretty good.

I like it. And he does a little flip like Randy does. Andy Cooper makes a good point. Maybe she thought it was a Yeti coffin cooler and she thought it was filled with beers. Oh. She's just like in a classic mix up. Yeah, that happens a lot.

That would be such. At the affordable coffin store. That'd be such a bummer to think that you're getting a Triple Hops Brewed Miller Lite and you slam that thing open and it's just a dead body. I feel like, uh, it's a tough surprise. Desecrating a corpse like that is, is a felony in most States. It's gotta be a, it's gotta be a crime. So we've got trespassing theft.

We've got theft over. I mean, what's a coffin cost? I mean, it's affordable, but coffins are not cheap. About 800 bucks or more. Sure. Dude, coffins are expensive. You have to let, some people like start putting money down for them beforehand. If I die, if I die, I don't want to be buried in a coffin then.

You put me in a little Folgers tin and I'll be fine with it. You just bury me into the Gucci store. Yeah. Dump me off over a lake. Titty baby? What'd you call me? Two chains, right? Titty boy.

Titty boy. Not titty baby. Why do they call him titty boy? Did I say baby? I thought you did, I don't know. I said titty boy. Titty baby's what Randy's always calling me. Titty boy. It's true.

Two chains. We'll spread you in Lake Como, Will. That's the only place you'll ever be happy again, according to theitty boy. It's true. Two chains. We'll spread you in Lake Como, Will. That's the only place you'll ever be happy again, according to the stream yesterday. It's true. Someone called out that I said, I uttered the phrase yesterday on the podcast, quote, while I was trying to enjoy myself in Lake Como,

and they're like, that is just a really insufferable way to say something. Yeah, you were trying. Dude, I was trying to enjoy myself. It was a tough day. Trying to catch a break, posted up by the lake. Just can't even enjoy myself here. You can't come back from stealing a body in a coffin.

Like that stays with you. I think this is more innocent than like what it leads you to believe. Like I think that she just might've been off that hen and just decided to get wild. Isn't like I don't remember it the best defense you can come up with though like maybe she I don't know. To her credit she didn't like like she wheeled it out to her credit she didn't like try to like you know go down the street with it what if she had gotten in the coffin after

wheeling it out and like rode that bitch down the middle of the strip. Just ghost ride it? Yeah. Like jackass in the shopping carts. Yeah. You could lose the coffin. That's tougher. Did the body fall out of the coffin, like coffin flop? I didn't have to have tipped it over. I didn't rig shit.

It is affordable. It could be shit wood. Coffin flop for me is the number one skit to show somebody to find out whether or not they will enjoy the show. It's a vibe check. If you're a coffin flop person, welcome to the show. If you're not, it's time to move on. Finally got a hit on Corncob TV, Dave.

Didn't you show people I think you should leave and you started with a weird-ass episode? He made me start with Carl Havoc. Starting with Carl Havoc is like the move. Dave got me sucked in. Really? Okay. To the move. They've got me sucked in. Really? Okay. To the show. Oh, worded. Um, for normal people that's worded fine, but you guys are just.

He got me sucked in. Yeah. I feel like that's still worded weird. I didn't say sucked off. I said, get me sucked in. Okay. Fucking human vortex. All right.

Let's just move on from that. No, it was Barrett and Laurel. It was after it was New Year's Eve. We went back to their place and I put on an episode of I think you should leave and it was just it was not the right time nor the right place. And it's a delicate balance of hair stuff. Yeah, it was tough. Yeah. It was tough.

What is YT Bernie talking about? There's just some new show, some new. There's an English teacher show based in Austin. It's like a CBS show or something like that. I don't know, heard it's woke. No, it's okay. So it's not a reality show or is it? We're not woke, right?

That's a mind virus. Randy's always saying, Randy's always like, dude, stand back. Did you see Conor McGregor's running for press? Yeah. Conor McGregor? Not here, in Ireland. In Ireland?

He's famous enough to win. He is. But I don't want that guy running my country. Why not? Cause he's a wild ass. He doesn't apologize to anybody. He's unhinged. So he's never fighting again.

That's just not gonna happen. That's fine though, right? I'm fine with it. Yeah, what's his record in this last? I'm fine with it. Yeah. What's his record in his last like four fights? Not good. Yeah. Like I would care if he was like undefeated and he wasn't going to fight again, but like

he kind of has lost his luster on that, on that front. It's a situational comedy. Thank you, Bernie. I love a good situational comedy. I'm just not watching that. No, I got too much loss to get through and. I'm just not watching that. No, I got too much loss to get through and now I'm starting an industry maybe. You're not.

It's everywhere. The more I think about it, yeah, I don't think Dave takes, he doesn't take our recommendations seriously. I respect it, honestly. That's not true. I take recommendations to heart. I have a theory that you refuse to watch Dave

with Lil Dicky because it's called Dave. He stole the name of your TV show. He popped up on a Rich Homie Kwan song I was listening to yesterday. Rest in peace. Oh, yeah. Let's save that money. Yeah. Yeah. Great song. It's so much that we have recommended to you so many shows that you decided to just go and watch Lost, a show that no one is watching. No one's watching it, but it is a historically well-watched show. Oh yeah.

Allegedly groundbreaking. It took over for a while. I would say it is groundbreaking. I was so sick of people talking about that. Yeah, I get it. To be fair to you, Dave, most of the shows that I recommend that you watch are not actually like prestige television.

Most of the time I walk in being like, guys, season 40 of the challenge, come on, it's time to get in. So I would love to do that, but I feel like there's so much backstory on characters and I'm just like, no, Dave Dave the first the pre-episode of This season for season 40 the challenge explains all the drama. So, you know going in You got all the heavy hitters because they have they dropped the bag on everybody So any anyone who's anyone is on this season? They should have gotten Theo Vaughn though. Oh He might be too big too big. I know but it would have been great. But like they got CT bananas. They got

the whole crew in there. I saw a tweet complaining about Anissa about how like her storylines been the same thing since she got her back surgery or something. I don't know. Anissa, Anissa ain't gonna win the challenge anytime soon. Okay. She usually gets pretty far though. Usually gets pretty far. Speaking of going far, what if I told you you could go to the Beyond? Ooh baby.

The Bourbon and Beyond. It's not next week, right? It's the week after next week. That sounds right. Okay, okay. September 19th to 22nd. At the Highland Festival Grounds at Kentucky Exposition Center in Louisville?

You talking about the world's largest music food in Bourbon Festival? I am, yeah. You mean the,ville? You talking about the world's largest music food in bourbon festival? I am, yeah. You mean the, I'm really talking about the unique immersive festival experience that includes some of the best music talent in country music, Americana, classic rock, alternative rock, roots, blues, bluegrass,

and adult contemporary. And boy, that's no joke because the lineup is sick. Are you a little worried about getting over your skis a little bit with these bourbon tastings? Yes. Okay. I am. Gonna have to really monitor my bourbon intake as I run from stage to stage. Yes. We got Zach, Brian, Cody Jenks, Dave Matthews

band, Sting, Beck, Tedesky Trucks band, Tyler Childers, My Morning Jacket. We were listening to some Matchbox 20 in the office yesterday. Oh, joy. Come on. Are you going to go next week, dude? I'm going to just wait for bourbon. They're in town a week from today. Just go see them, dude. Yeah, I'm not crazy about the Moody Center. You don't like paying $23 for a beer? No. Oh, okay. Okay.

Then I guess we'll just wait and see my bourbon and beyond. I'd rather drink bourbon with the boys. We're staying at the Louisville Marriott downtown. Shots to them. Very excited about it. Downtown right in the thick of everything. Don't tell people where we're staying, man. People are gonna be like showing up, like, good, show up, show up. Broadcast.

What, you think it's gonna be like an away soccer match? Like where like the listeners show up and keep us up all night. They're gonna be calling our rooms. The dumb fucks are gonna show up and try to make us tired. One of the artists is staying at our hotel. They walk out and they're like,

what, you're not here for me? Like, no, no, our favorite podcast is staying here too. Yeah, we have little microphones for us to sign. Waiting for Dave to walk out. He's my favorite. D-Man. Dude, man, when touching bass, broke my heart, so happy y'all are back. So long ago.

For more information on Bourbon and Beyond, please visit bourbonandbeyond.com. They believe in quality over quantity, so please drink responsibly. There's a link to purchase tickets in the description of the episode. Can't wait to see you there. I am a little stressed that we're about 24 hours away from kickoff Michigan Texas and I have exactly zero plans for this game. You know I'm gonna throw this out there Will and do with it whatever you will. Your house is a great place to watch a game. Yeah but just to pull back the curtain a little bit there are two people in my house

right now who are very sick and one, and then the other person in my house is just getting over being very sick. Okay. So I'm actually penciling myself in to acquire this probably tonight and then wake up tomorrow with like 103 degree fever. You should go to one of the wellness places

and get just like the full IV drip. I think I'm just gonna get a hotel room downtown and just chill there for the weekend. I did that during COVID when I thought I was exposed. It's a baller move. I think you just want to get out of the house for a couple days. Honestly, I mean, I walked down, I got pizza on Rainey, went home, went to the hotel room, went right to bed, nothing in between.

There's a new viral burger in Austin, Texas that Randy's been chomping on. I had about three quarters of it. You didn't finish it? I didn't finish it. Too much? The NADC burger that everyone's talking about. It was good. It wasn't amazing. Great. It wasn't like the Leroy and Lewis burger. I think that's a really good burger. Interesting. What does it say about me when people start like doing an insane glaze of burger and stuff that it just makes me want to try it even less. I'm just like, all right, I'm sure it's the best burger of all time. I still need to try the Bill's one. You're the one that glazed that one. That's a really good one. That's a really good one. I'm gonna say it's the best of all time, but like in Austin for me, it's a top five burger. Which one? Bill's, oyster. Still need to go there.

Well, next time we go to a Bob Weir show at Moody Theater downtown, I'll take you to Bills. If my old roommate's there, he might give us the employee discount. And I'll buy you a cheeseburger. Might get a hat too. I'll get you exactly one Miller High Life, the champagne and beers.

Oh, glad to. You know they have Miller High Life there. I didn't, I've never been there. Very few places that have, okay. Very few, they have Miller High Life there. I didn't, I've never been there. Very few places that have, okay. Very few places that have Miller High Life these days in Austin, Texas. Okay. I'm just a, I'm a high life living the low life brother. No, what's he talking about? What's Leo H. The Furburger from Coochies. I don't know. I've never been to

Coochies. Dave, have you? No, that was at a time. The Fur Burger. Come on. Place you were recommending on your track house stream. Leo, that's a little horny for 11 a.m., brother. I need to do some work on this coffee. Randy, what's the percentage out on the AI? Beep, bop, boop.

Yeah, 50%. I'm not at 50. Actually, with the ice, I could be. Yeah, you're questioning AI? Dude, Beyonce last night, she put up an Instagram post and it got tagged as utilizing AI. She deleted it and reposted it this morning. And I really want to know what happened there. No way.

To pull back the curtain, to pull back the curtain, I'm not trying to expose Beyonce. I used a photo of her one time on Scaries, and that post is the only post that I've ever gotten tagged as AI on Sunday Scary. Where does it say? At the top, like you know where it usually says the location? Wow. Yeah. That's embarrassing.

Like even for the biggest pop star in the world, maybe second biggest. Does that mean people turn her in or is there some kind of algorithm that figures it out? It's an algorithm. The AI police. You can turn it, if you actually make something

with AI yourself, you can turn on, like, hey, this was made by AI, and it'll tell people. Which I think people might do so they don't get called out for trying to do it. That's a tough look. Like, you know, Billy Strings? I don't know.

The bluegrass guy though? Not personally, no. Like he had an, they contracted out an artist who used AI to make all the merch for a leg of his tour. And- Is he upfront about it? Oh, he like, Billy Strings, like once they, once he realized what was going on, he like did a whole thing being like, I'm, I'm sorry. We obviously don't down this.

He's a Michigan boy. Beyonce has more followers. Is he the guest picker this weekend? No, who was Dylan? Was it you saying that like Will Ferrell is going to be there in Ann Arbor? Yeah. Do we ever figure out what Michael Phelps Phelps is the guest picker. He went to Michigan though.

Why is, why is Will Ferrell who's USC playing this weekend? Why is, why is Will Ferrell going to Texas, Michigan? I don't know. Maybe he's got something to promote and he went his way in. I don't know. When game day comes to Texas this year, which they will, because Texas will be undefeated deep into the season and they're going to have a big game against Georgia, who is the top person to get for the game day picker?

I mean, they're running back McConaughey and Glenn Powell over and over again. You have to do Glenn, I think. the top person to get for the game day picker. I mean, they're running back McConaughey and Glenn Powell over and over again. You have to do Glenn, I think. I think Glenn's a better get right now than McConaughey. Glenn was at, he did it for, I think Texas OU last year. Okay. Or maybe it was two years ago. McConaughey's still a bigger name.

He put on a fake blonde mullet wig for Quinn, so it must have been two years ago. But I don't think McConaughey moves the needle as much as Glenn does for people right now. You're right. Depends on what demo you're talking about. Yeah. And also, he's the next McConaughey. He passed the torch as the hot Texas fan actor. I need to come up with like a short list of things

that will be the serious role that Glenn will win his Oscar for. It's gonna happen eventually. Oh. Or he's gonna play, he's going to go serious at some point and do some type of like really hardcore weight loss or weight gain or something for a film. It's gonna happen.

Game day was at Texas twice last year, right? Cause they did TCU. I heard Doug Dimmadome is gonna be the guest picker. That's when I was at the Doug Dimmadome and they had Spieth as the guest picker. Texas TCU was a game day? I guess TCU came out with a Natty appearance. No, that was a huge game.

Scheffler and Spieth are players too. I skipped the second half and went to Kanji. Oh, I skipped to go dove hunting. They lost to TCU in that game. Sheffler and Spieth are players too. I skipped the second half and went to Kanji. Oh, I skipped to go dove hunting. They lost to TCU in that game. It makes sense. That was two years ago. I told Sally, I was like, we have a Kanji reservation at 9 PM. I think like we were sitting at the game and I was like, I don't think they're like, I think if they lose, we're going to be pissed that we sat here for the

second half. I think we should just go there. If they win, we're happy. If they lose, then, Hey, at least we didn't waste our time and we're full of jerk chicken. That's a good consolation. Yeah. Mid-November jerk chicken on a cold night in Austin, Texas hits so good. Yeah, I can't argue. Scotty might be the biggest name. Oh chef. It's Glenn, pal. For celebrities, it's Glenn. I think Scottie would be an awesome guest picker though.

Who will plays better with the game day crowd? The athlete alum or the actor alum? The actor. He's got more charisma. I feel like Scottie's sneaky got more charisma than we think. Definitely more than Jordan. Scottie's not gonna talk any shit well in the match

against Brooks and I don't know, man. He's a crook, felon. He was arrested. It's true. Never convicted. Charges dropped. Take it back. I take it back. Who's that dude? Who's that golf dude that I have muted on Twitter? Use golf facts? No. He's like generic golf guy on Twitter. He's got decent tweets, but I just got sick of seeing him because I didn't follow him, so I muted him. But he did a breakdown of how much Scottie Scheffler made per shot this year, and it was like an absurd amount. And then somebody made the comment like he should have taken more shots if he was making that much. That's good. That's a good comment. Yeah, that said nobody ever to me.

I don't need more shots, right? If you're going to a bar this weekend and you have to go buy a round of shots, what are you picking up? I don't remember the last time I did that. I'm going tequila. Yeah, I'm just going tequila. Silver tequila.

I'll keep it simple. I'm not doing like a mind eraser, whatever people are doing. No, we don't sit on this podcast live and talk trash about mind erasers or a kamikaze I'm hitting them with the fireball. Look at this pick real quick Green tea shots are like the biggest ones right now. You're talking about This pick that boy but Johnny Dallas Johnny upside down Dallas He said he said nobody nobody informed him that Aloha Friday, his office was canceled.

It doesn't explain the upside down Dallas hat. Can we play, we were just talking about liquor. Can we talk, can we play that clip? Yeah. From the Dallas food blogger. Oh, well, what Mike is doing. That almost looks like a fake upside down Dallas hat because I didn't, does Michael wear an RG shirt?

I've never seen it on a dad cap before. Yeah. That's what I was thinking. I kind of hate it on a dad cap even more. Is this the most swag list version of the upside down Dallas hat? Yeah. The idea that Michael might've bought a fake upside down Dallas cap is my favorite.

You got it made like custom. He is Johnny Dallas though. He is. Yeah. Let's play, let's play that video. So a listener sent this to us. Well, we had a conversation on the track house yesterday about what? About different tequilas. We're talking Lalo, Clausé Azul. Lalo is great. But this happened in Dallas, speaking of, good segue, from an Instagram account, Blondes Who Eat, which I always say are the best Blondes.

Real eaters. Love them. But let's just hit play. This is good. Because I just got home and tomorrow I feel like I just won't care anymore. We went to dinner here tonight in Dallas and I'm not going to say the name of it because the food was exceptional. But we got the bill. Normally I don't look at bills. I'm just like, yep, sounds good. Here's my card. I like in my head knew that we only got like $100 worth of food. The food was great. So how did we get to $530?

Let me tell you. And I ain't just, I'm doing this because I just need justification or like if this is normal. Haley and I got Lalo Blanco Skinny Spicy Margaritas, right? $14 plus prep, $3.. I was like, what's prep? And he was like, oh, it's the shaking of the margarita. You charge $3 to shake the margarita. So our Lalo Blanco margaritas were $17. That's fine, right? Just put $17. Don't put prep. So then we go further down for Tlaiseanco, $32. Okay, great.

It's fine. So I'm going for $32. The prep for that specific one was $13. $13 to shake the margarita. Then Casa Dragones Blanco, three of them, $28. Her prep was $15. Then she got a double, which was $22. $75 drink. $75 drink. What? Pretty bad, right? So yeah. How do you not tell us the restaurant? The comments were really, really... Is there anyone in the comments that are guessing?

Can you scroll down and see? Because like I would feel so I would feel like such a shithead as the waiter bringing a tab that said that it was a three dollar prep for a martini or twelve dollar whatever it is. I am not a push back guy when it comes to like arguing

bills. I would throw a fit. I would I would I would talk a fit. Yeah. I would, I would, I would, I would talk to the manager. Like this is, that's unbelievable. She needs to say what this place was to charge a, like, what is the, so you're only paying for the alcohol and depending on how you do it, like, yeah, just thank you, Seth. Just hide the charge. I appreciate her for putting this out there because the more, the more people who like talk about it and shame a place like this, it's got to get changed. That is unbelievable. That screws over the waiter more than anybody too because like people just get pissed and take it out on you and then your tip is lower.

Like I would never work at somewhere like that. A prep fee. I had a woman one time complain that between the time that she sat down for lunch and when lunch was served to her, it was 45 minutes and she threw a fit and I looked at her and I was like, I'm not making the food. I know I'm treating you well. Customer's always right. I went and I was like, whatever. She went and found the guy whose name was on the restaurant who was there that day and

she talked to him about me taking too long with their meal. And I was like, are you kidding? And he looked at me and he just goes, take it. Just take it right now. Go over and apologize. Then he grabbed my arm and he brought me into this like side area.

And he just looked at me and he goes, fuck her. Don't worry about her dude. And I was like, thank, I was like, I thought he was gonna fire me. And he was just like, don't worry about her dude. There's awful people, there's terrible customers thank they, I was like, I was, I thought he was going to fire me. And he was just like, don't worry about her, dude. There's awful people. There's terrible customers. Don't let them ruin your day.

Oh my God. That's unbelievable. I've never heard of that in my life. I gotta say, I bet their table was really fun. The list of drinks and the fact that like, she's a blonde who eats. The one that one girl, uh, went the fuck off. Yeah. She got three drinks and then a double.

I mean, what's going on? $28. No, were they doing it table side? It doesn't sound like, can you imagine sitting at the bar just being like, all right, I'm going to go, like, I got some time to kill before this concert. Let's go get a drink at this bar. Let's see if they have any seats open. You go, you get one martini and you look and you're like, wait, wait, what?

You charged me $12 to shake my drink. But to sneak it in on the tab it's like the the menu clearly says it's a $14 cocktail and then like oh by the way it's actually 17 and then you got tax and tip on top of that and you're talking about a $14 cocktail turns in a 22 23 bullshit this uh this is this is big news, especially with the news that Austin's own Estelle, Estelle's closed. I'm happy about it. I went through for about 15 minutes and read the comments and there was maybe two positive ones and the positive ones were like embarrassed to say they enjoyed that place. But everybody else was like, yeah, I like going to the bar across the street and just watching the worst people you've ever seen walk in.

Yeah. I mean, by all accounts, it was like a cool, vibey place. Yeah. I never went. The space itself was cool, but like you walk in there and you're like, okay. It's a very pretentious place. It looks, I went to their Instagram and it did look very pretentious. Oh, Aaron Ryan makes a good point here that she might be in the wrong because

she's discussing her finances publicly. I bet she doesn't do that typically. I appreciate this blonde who eats for putting this out there. Have you guys ever brought a bottle of wine to a restaurant where they have a cork fee? Yes. No. Did you have to pay to have it? What's the place that was over by Deep Eddy? It was a little house.

Yeah. Something in Twig or something. Yeah, I've only been there once Dave, and it was the Christmas party of Grand Ex after they let everyone go. I thought that place was close by there. As you can imagine, the vibes were crazy in there. Dude, that place is like tiny.

The second that dinner got over, Micah, Boo Boo, and I sprinted out of there and said, we need to go have a drink somewhere else right now and calm down after this night. Nothing bad happened, but it was just like, none of us wanted to be there. What did they call the fee again? Like a mixing fee. What was it? Yeah prep prep fee Unreal I've never heard of that in my life I'd walk up to the bartender and just be like do you really think this is how we're doing this?

I think really the bartender is probably like dude. Do you think I have anything to do with this? But I'm like four martinis deep. Like dude, what's your problem? Fuck that place. I hope that place goes under. I really do. Do you have any guesses what it could be? Like what are the most ridiculous restaurants in Dallas? I looked at all the ones that had been tossed out and I didn't recognize any of them. Somebody said the Rustic and I knew it wasn't. That's Pat Green's place. So Carbone wouldn't do it because like Carbone's too popular to have that kind of- No, that would have gotten out by now.

Yeah. No, it's being, I don't know. I don't know. There's so many new like upscale Mexican-American cuisine places that I don't recognize the name, but it sounds really good. Seth is saying the corkage fees are ridiculous. Like I want him to tell us what a ridiculous corkage fee is because I don't really know what

to expect. I was talking about this with someone recently that it seems like a good move, but you don't want to go pay for a bottle of wine and then pay $40 for a corkage fee. Sometimes it's like $40. I did it one time and it was $30, but the bottle of wine we brought in was not nice and we were just like, well, we're still saving a ton of money right now. So like, I don't really give a shit, but I would like to know like what a ridiculous one would be. I'm kind of done. I don't want to sound like Sam Taylor right now, who famously talked about this recently on her podcast, but I don't really care to order a bottle of wine at a restaurant at this point. It's a lot of wine to drink. I need one single glass with dinner and I'll be a happy boy.

I'll take down a bottle. I can't do it. I can't take down a whole bottle. I'm a whining boy though. Yeah, it's true. You spit or swallow. I just drink it. No one's doing hat tips to their trailer episode like I do. Yeah.

I'm still, I'm shocked by this still. It's bothering me. We should do a Dallas meetup and go to the place once it gets outed. I would like someone to go- I'm I'm still I'm shocked by by who wouldn't put up with this. She would know the manager's name within five seconds. What happened, Dave? James, who is watching the stream, who's in the comments, is texting me like shows on Netflix. He loves texting during live streams. I guess, intern Klein was texting me

during track house yesterday. He wants us to talk about it. I don't mind a track house text, but intern Klein, he said, do not read this on air. This is my version of posting Instagrams during the mid pod. He just wants to be talked about. He said, dude, rebel Ridge on Netflix is incredible. Rebel.

Thank you, James. I'll read a shout out on the stream. Yeah, he got it. Do you think Avery Tomasco when he was in high school, his buddies called him sauce? Yes, Barrett, Sam Taylor is a Matt El Rancho's girl. Yeah, we got a DM from a listener recently or maybe just a tweet that said that we've ruined him and he can't say it the regular way anymore. And I am the exact same way.

When we were at my in-laws wedding and like the family loves Matt's, I said Matt El Rancho's and was like, I'm so sorry. That's El Rancho But it rolls off the tongue really nice. Yeah, she's onto something Hey, since James is is texting me. I'm gonna I'm gonna do more of this during small business but look our friend James has been looking for a job and He is a first of all, he's an Oregon grad. Don't hold it against him. Oregon's a great school, I guess. I don't know. He's a partnerships manager and a content strategist. He also has great calves. He's got great calves. He's been- Sounds like we should just hire him. His skills include empathy-led client

services and partnerships from pitch to close, which is huge. He lives in Austin. He's a grinder. He's a good guy. Good style. He has aura. He'll text you when you're in the middle of a live show. He has aura. But if anybody out there has a company that's looking for someone, I've got his resume here. It's a good resume. I've got to say, he's got it all on one page, which you love to see. I've got a little project for Sunday Scaries that I'm tasking James with helping me with. We're having a Guinness over it next week. I like that.

You got to feed the fam dude. I want all my boys to make it even as before me. What I like about James is that he's used data driven insights to forecast and refine campaign strategies. We need this company to work out long-term because I never want to write a resume for the rest of my life. I got to say, this looks like something we could use at some point. I know.

I just don't know. Anyway, if you have any interest in hiring James, email me, Dave at washedmedia.com. I can forward you the resume. When I tagged you in a tweet or in a text yesterday, Dave, did it tag you as David or Dave in the text? Like when you tag someone, does it acclimate to their phone? Or does it show up on- I've always wondered that.

Because what did you tag me in? I was tagging you to where the, I wanted, I said odds that you dress like Blake from The Bachelor for Bourbon and Beyond. He's wearing the sleeveless shirt that says good things happen to those who pet dogs. Do you know how many people have pet dogs before? A lot.

Sometimes I reach out and pet dogs. Reach out and pet dogs. That's what he's doing. Oh my God. Will, when are you doing a Goodles on track house? It tag me as David. You're right. Okay. Yeah. Sorry. I have you with your birth name. What's a Goodle? I'm looking it up. Do you know what it is, Randy? I don't know. I know what Gator wine is. Gatorade and Boone's farm. Just wine or Sutter homes, whatever

it is. I mean, I'll drink I'll drink one of those. That's probably fine. It's just it's just a lot of sugar. Google's like, aren't those just like a brand of noodles? That's oodles. Oh, what's your favorite noodle shape? It's a really good question. I don't like penne. Oh, we're talking that I thought we were talking about like little kids macaroni. You know, you can get like the Mario macaroni. Like Spider-Man. Oh, were you guys traditional Kraft Mac and cheese or were you a Velveeta shells and cheese? We mixed it up. There's only two ones when you're that age, you know?

Velveeta shells and cheese goes crazy hard. My sister was a big Velveeta shells and cheese guy and cheese goes crazy hard. My sister was a big Velveeta shells and cheese guy and my, I was more of a traditional craft. But you know, when she won that fight, I wasn't upset. Yeah. I started putting buffalo sauce in my mac and cheese like eight years ago and it changes everything. He's clarified here. It's a Guinness and a cup of noodles. Yeah, no one's doing that. I mean, I don't know. Yeah, I don't need it. Give me rigatoni. I think I said, we talked about this last week. Rigatoni.

What's Tony rigging? It's a funny one. It's a fun one to say. Not fun. Rigatoni's, I feel like, I feel like good rigatoni's really good, but like if I made rigatoni, it would suck. Pinet is my jam. You guys like these little tubes? Tube shapes, you know?

I'm a tube boy. What shape? I'm a tube boy. My tube. I heard you like angel hair. Somebody hated angel hair. I don't love pasta that I have, that's hard to eat. Like spaghetti, I mean.

Why is it hard to eat? Cause you can't spin it? I can spin it, but you still can't you still can't keep it. It still falls. It does. It does. You can't do a perfect spaghetti bite and it all stay right up on the fork once you spin it. Not everyone's perfect. I have a pair of shorts that I brought on vacation with me. And I busted them out on like the, I don't know, second to last night so I could wear them again.

And they were stained both with pasta sauce and Campari It's hot. It's like dude. I was fucking living that this guy was on one This guy was being a tally this guy went to Italy for sure You guys are so European Pilled because I'm probably going to go ramen or maybe even chow mein if I'm going noodles You like those weird slick clear noodles clear noodles. I do creepy, dude. Those are creepy. Those are so good. I don't know why they remind me of like a deep sea, like worm.

What's it made of? Maybe sweet potato? I'm not sure. White Bernie might be right here. Papa Dela. Oh, it is White Bernie. He clarified it's YouTube Bernie. No, it's White Bernie.

Okay. It's not YouTube Bernie. That's what he said on the stream. So he said on track house, yeah. Sorry. They used to call me Mr. Rigatoni. Really? What was that subway commercial?

There's like a subway commercial and they're like, they used to call me Mr. Spicy Rigatoni. Like what? Oh, and it was the real big guy lost a bunch of weight. I don't know oh Jared yeah Jail do you think it's in a fantasy league? I Don't want to even know you when this is are. What do you win? Cigarettes.

Cigs. Toilet wine. What's the hottest commodity in jail? Cigs? Cigs. How do you get a lighter? I bet cell phone access. Well, yeah, for sure.

Which you can get in prison. The closest experience I have to go into prison is watching KJ. The Night Of. That show sucked. That was a good first episode. One of the goaded pilots for any TV show ever. It fell off a steep cliff. The rest of that show just sucked. It fell off a steep cliff.

Every Sunday night, it was like, hey, let's see how miserable I can be for the next week. Yeah, maybe they redeemed themselves this episode finally, episode five, and they just didn't. Hey, let's see how little they can move the plot along in one single episode. It was terrible. It was great acting by all the people involved,

but the storyline just sucked. The first episode, you got everybody sucked in. I don't even know how I don't even know how it ended see you were that one right doesn't matter John away was on that though he's been rapping KJ's in the chat what's KJ KJ gotta holla at my hair Tony I didn't say it we almost got canceled I didn't say it. We almost got canceled. I don't know. I clicked on the wrong Twitter video before the live one.

Don't even describe it. That would have been bad. Yeah. Elon's got to clean it up. Do you have autoplay? No, I thought it was a normal video. I just clicked on it. And suddenly there's just the most severe of hate speech you could ever have.

Like what? I don't like that. I deleted the Twitter app from my phone for a little bit. I was spending too much time on it on vacation and I was like, all right, I'm just going to delete it for now. Like I don't need to be on here. You just went off the grid. So if I'm tweeting, just know that it's real Twitter hours and that I'm sitting at a computer.

I'm not saying I'm not going to get on Twitter, but I think I shouldn't spend my free time on it right now. I think I'll redownload it once this election's over. It's just so good during sports. I don't know. It doesn't, that has not changed one bit. See, that's, that's the game changer, Dave. I have not watched any sports since I've deleted it.

And so it's going to be tough this weekend during college football to not hop on. Got to get those game day tweets off got to Game days a juiced juiced up tweet hours. We're like you throw something out there. That's like yeah, it's fine It's a good a good tweet, but nothing nothing you feel great about and then you look down and I wait Cut a little cut a little algorithm. Dude. What's McAfee gonna do this weekend? And Arbor with all those jeeters in town.

McConaughey. Jeets is in town. Jeets. Michigan guy. Will Farrell. Is there any part of you that's bummed you're not going to this game? Of course. I will I will love to go to the big house at some point. Yeah. Yeah. Hog. You think we're going to get a McAfee hog reveal finally?

Finally. I bet he did. I'm surprised he didn't do it during the Ireland episode. Yeah. I could see him spinning that thing. Oh, it's not just a reveal. It's a helicopter. Helicopter.

See, Tony P did some SponCon with Comcast Xfinity. No. No. Yeah, he did a full video about getting his internet set up. He went to the store and sat through an in-store presentation. Did you hear the crazy fact about him? He said this on the Barstool show. So he's a, this is gonna blow your mind. He's a Democrat, but he likes sopranos.

Like isn't that crazy? That's wild. He's just like a, he's a different dude. You just don't see that very often. That's what he said. It was like some big revelation. He's Italian. There you go.

The, the Shirley Temple King's Italian as well, Randy. I, the Randy has a new op. I don't know. I respect his ratings for Shirley temples. He's clearly the king and he's had plenty enough of them. But if he's going to give that Mountain Dew Baha Blastulato an eight one, are you kidding me? Shirley Temple King? I'm looking at you. That was not an eight one. I enjoyed it, but not an eight. You guys familiar with the Shirley Temple King? No, there's no one on social media right now with

more moxie than the Shirley Temple King. This kid just goes to baller resorts, orders their Shirley Temples and rates them and he is not kind. If it's a good Shirley Temple, he will call it out. But like if you serve it with ginger beer instead of like ginger ale instead of sprite, he'll call you out. If there's less than I think three cherries, he's either a two cherry guy or a three cherry guy, he will call you out it's hardcore play one of his reviews oh damn dude this kid's gonna grow up and be a full-blown announcer like he's really good at what he does see yeah let's just do the most recent one looks like Seth MacFarlane

guys this is Shoa Temple King and I'm here at Trail 87 in Westover Vermont now I gotta say this is definitely one of the coolest chairs I've ever seen. It's made out of skis. Cool chair. Really cool. I'd like to have one of these like in my room. Great hair on this kid too. Because why not? They look really cool. Um but anyway, the Shirley Temple, beautiful color, two cherries. I think it might be a little light up here. Let me give it a little mix and but as I'm exploring this, a lot of ice. I'm very happy to say that there is a lot of ice so let's give this dry

Cheers everybody It is a lime soda, but there's a pretty good grenadine ratio The only bad thing about this is that it is right and it's missing one cherry so with that and it's missing one cherry. So with that, I'm gonna have to give this a six point five out of 10. Cheers everybody, have a good day. It's fair. I like the top comment that just says, try Hennessy.

Yeah. That kid's got it, man. Dude, right? I think he's got a future in this. But like all the places he goes, you just know that his mom and dad have baller jobs because it's like, like oh you're at this You're at this really nice resort drinking, but one of the nicest things you can get

But yeah, I don't think that the gelato was not an eight one. I'm sorry I think I think Taco Bell paid him off, but it's fine I don't think he's doing under the table spawn con with Taco Bell. Yes. I wasn't I was being honest If I want to pay me I I will definitely review my review. Can I talk about the logistics of your review? Yeah. Did you... My socks weren't knocked off.

Did you bring it home and put it in the freezer? Or did you bring it home and then eat it immediately? I put it... I brought it home and put it in the freezer for maybe probably an hour max. Okay. Because I already got my regular Taco Bell too. I'm like, well, I'm going to eat my taco. and put it in the freezer for maybe probably an hour max. Okay. Because I already got my regular Taco Bell too.

I'm like, well, I'm going to eat my taco. Yeah. I didn't want you to go home and immediately eat it before you ate your Taco Bell. Like I wanted it to be structurally sound for you. If anything I did it the right way. I ate it as the dessert after a Taco Bell meal, how it's probably supposed to be enjoyed.

What was the Taco Bell order? I did one soft shell taco. I did a chicken flatbread thing that they have, it's pretty good. Hm, mungweed. That sounds terrible. And a like beefy, crunchy, five layer burrito or something like that.

Oh yes, yes. And like I said, I don't have a go-to order. I let the menu speak to me. I heard rumors that they're bringing back some old menu items for like a limited time as Like a heritage menu and they might be bringing back my all-time favorite item from Taco Bell the maxi melt Oh is the Mexican pizza still on there? I assume the Mexican pizza still on there brought it back It's is that a sock hard play. Oh, that's good. No, it's not

No, if I get if I get Detroit style this weekend, and I didn't have Detroit style earlier in the week Is that a different za? Please say Look at it. Okay. It's a pot. It's reviewed. Yeah being reviewed. There's one thing that they should bring back It's the Cool Ranch Doritos Locos tacos so good. Oh, yeah I never had any of those but it honestly sounds really good I guess everyone that I've ever talked to has been like that That's the best item they've ever had I don't like to read up. So you want to hear the dumb guy thing I did yesterday? Sure So roach has taken two english muffins

In the morning And um, he ate probably a quarter of one and he said Can we he's like, I don't want it, but i'll eat it after school. It's like, okay, we'll save it Now this is like here put this up put this in the fridge And I was I was doing something else and I just got it on the plate And I didn't even put it in a bag and I just put it in the fridge And then we were home yesterday and he wanted it like, you know five o'clock. She got it out She's like did you not put this in a bag? I was like, I did not. She's like, this is like a brick. She's like,

he can't eat this. And he's rogues. Like what's wrong with my English muffin? Your dad is a real dumb dumb. I liked that he's a nooks and crannies guy though. Little honey on it, little butter. Is that a Thomas? What's the other brand? Not Bay, but there aren't other brands, dude. No, he's not a Thomas guy. He's the other one. Sally, Sally bought whole wheat English muffins the other brand, not Bay, but there aren't other brands, dude. No, he's not a Thomas guy. He's the other one. Sally, Sally bought whole wheat English muffins the other day. They're not the same. English muffins do go pretty well.

They don't have the nooks and crannies like the, I don't even know what kind of bread the other one's, it kind of is giving sourdough. I'm not sure. Bay's, he's a Bay's guy. I don't know what that means. But I know that you're like, you're a wheat bread guy if you're ordering a sandwich somewhere. I am.

But can I say that if you're eating an English muffin, it's got to be the white bread? Oh yeah, of course. Okay. It's wild to me that they even- No question. The wheat ones are so mid. If you were like-

No question. People that bug me, if you go to a cool sandwich spot and you get a New York sub and you get it on wheat and not the white bread or something- I'm a white bread guy. I love white bread. There's very little difference I think in how your stomach digests it.

What do you order for toast if you're at a diner? Sourdough. If they have sourdough, I'll go sourdough. I'll go rye on them once in a while just to keep them guessing. Rye so thick. It's not that- Is it rye thick? It feels voluminous. You mean dense?

I'm not a rye guy. I don't know. Do you like rye whiskey? Sure. Sure. Okay. Come. Hey, Randy. Wow, Will's finished. We are zero percent coffee. Well, thanks to everyone who tuned in for Coffee Friday. That was fun. I want to do this more. I'll be honest. I think we should do most episodes completely live. I do too.

Maybe not with the chat up. It's kind of distracting with the chat up. It is. But sometimes we'll get a good comment to put up on the screen and talk through. I kind of enjoy it. It is a little bit distracting. All right, guys. It's distracting but hmm. All right guys. It's been real It's been special. It's been real special Cl-cl-cl-closes on Coffees and closes on And Kajak

Holy shit, what a car Bing bang