Circling Back - Darth Gator And Real Or Fake Preworkouts Volume 2

Episode Date: August 18, 2021

We talk about the alligator trainer attacked by an alligator named Darth Gator, the Time Travel TikTok guy and when we would travel to, the second edition of Real or Fake Pre-workouts, This Weekend in Fun, and more. Support us on Patreon and receive weekly episodes for as low $5 per month: www.patreon.com/circlingbackpodcast Watch all of our full episodes on YouTube: www.youtube.com/washedmedia Shop Washed Merch: www.washedmedia.shop (14:08) Gator Attack (25:45) Time Travel TikTok (36:37) Real or Fake Preworkouts II (1:01:11) This Weekend in Fun presented by Birddogs Support This Episode’s Sponsors •    Honey: Join for free at joinhoney.com/CIRCLINGBACK •    Headspace: www.headspace.com/CIRCLING for free month •    Birddogs: www.birddogs.com (STEAM for free football) --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/circling-back/message Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

All right, we're back circling back podcast presented by busy hard seltzer. The only hard seltzer with vitamin C and super fruit acerola. My name is Will DeFreeze to my left. To my left. Just to be crystal clear, he is to my left. David Carter Ruff. It may. Yeah, I noticed something on the T-Element a minute ago. I need to talk about it. I'm excited for what you're about to read. So Internet Party, there's some friends of ours and they're in our network. And apparently on their latest episode, they discuss at circling back pods, that's us, Harry Potter knowledge, parentheses, or lack thereof.

And I don't really know who they're going at, but I will listen. I'm going to listen to the episode as I often do, but I just, to be clear, I never claim to be like Remus Lupin or something. Like I never claimed to be like a professor of the dark arts or just to know it all. But for them to come at me hypothetically if that's what they do and if not, I apologize. I think that's a little bit out of bounds.

That's all. Wow. Now, now, they could be talking about somebody else. Yeah, you never know, dude. It's always something with these guys. Yeah, they could just be mashing that homonym Rebellio, and it could just be someone else they're talking about that's not you. I was about to say the same thing.

Dude, right? Might hit them with that Ricky Rubio. Yeah, they should just stick to pervy stuff, you know, and stay out of our lane. Damn. This is our lane. Dude, they just hit you with the immobilist because they just stopped you in your tracks, player.

Damn, dog. You're pulling out all the magic tricks on them they just stopped you in your tracks, player. Damn, dog. You're pulling all the magic tricks on them. I'm just a big Harry Potter guy. Big Harry Potter guy. Man. Speaking of a big Harry guy that likes pot, Dylan Chivary. Such a reach. I'm very happy and excited today.

He's not even Harry. He's not that Harry. I'm not that Harry. No, you're mid-Harry. I got Harry Chess, you know. All that pre-workout. Speaking of, I'm very happy hairy. I'm not that hairy. No, you're mid-hairy. I got a hairy chest, you know. All that pre-workout. Speaking of, I'm very happy and excited today. Very happy.

Ask me why. Why are you very happy and excited today, Dylan? Because we're doing real or fake pre-workouts, addition to. You said, you said, very defiantly, that you exhausted it last time. I thought I did. So I thought I did. And then we posted it and then people started to comment being like, oh, you left off this. You left off that.

So it got me thinking, what did I miss? So I did a deep, deep dive to the Internet looking for ones that I may have missed. And guess what? I missed a lot. I'm going to put this out there. I did not read any of the comments of other ones that have been made. I have not Googled any other ones because this entire time I have been very much hoping that we would run it back. Dave, on the other hand, I can't speak for Dave.

Have you been cheating? No. Okay. Anything that happened a month ago, when did we do that? Two months ago? There's no way I would remember it. That happened a month ago. When did we do that?

Two months ago? There's no way I would remember it. But I will sell out. As long as we can get more free pre-workouts sent to the office, I'll do whatever you want to do. Yeah, as long as I can get some more apeshit cuts up in this bitch, I'm fine. I've been taking apeshit cuts. That stuff hits. Yeah, it's goaded.

Well, I don't know if it's goaded, but it's something. It's great stuff. So, yeah. It's coming up later in this episode, folks. Just stay tuned. Dave, did you happen to, by any chance, stop at McDonald's today for a glass of milk before coming into the office? No, I didn't even have time. I'm going to take a break from McDonald's Westlake, actually. Really?

Yeah, my iced, basically it was supposed to be iced coffee, but it ended up just being creamer with a splash of coffee. It didn't hit yesterday. In fact, I'll pull back the curtain. We were recording our Patreon episode, our worst of. Check it out. I had to pause in the middle of the recording and go take care of some business. And I'm blaming the creamer that I did not order. Dude, what's up with fast food restaurants just messing with us?

I tried to get a double chicken burger last night, and instead of that, they just gave me two chicken burgers at P. Terry's. I don't need two chicken sandwiches. I just wanted one. Did you take the chicken off of one and double stack on the other one, or did you just eat both of them? I thought about it, but then I was like, no, it's going to get too loco if I do that. I'm just going to have one, and then an hour later, I ate the other one.

Damn. You waited an hour. Yeah, I didn't think it would be prudent to just slam both of them. And so I waited an hour before I had my second chicken sandwich of the night. No regrets. Nobody's going back-to-back chicken sandwiches on a Wednesday, a Tuesday even. Yeah, you don't see that anywhere. It's never been done, actually.

Not going to lie, I opened up the New York Times app, which at this point isn't even a news app for me. It's just for the mini crossword. Big mini crossword guy lately. And the Wednesday one was available last night around 9 p.m., and I started freaking out. I was like, what day is it? I had no clue what day it actually was. A little early release? Yeah.

I was like, don't release this early, please. Dave knows about that. Dude, I'm sorry. I'm in real fake pre-workout mood right now. You know how I am. You know how I am, David. Nothing makes Dylan more giggly than when he's doing this. You were cackling at your seat.

There's some ridiculous ones. God. This is all on the heels of you doing a 9.30 a.m. chicken sandwich from Shake Shack. A chicken sandwich. A chicken sandwich. I love chicken. What's that kid up to? Does he have a podcast yet?

You won't believe it, but he's already 35 years old. I was going to say the kid's nine. You want to feel old? That kid's already retired. That's crazy. That kid's now the president of the kid's nine. You want to feel old? That kid's already retired. Wow. That's crazy. That kid's now the president of the AARP. Why do child actors grow at like five times the normal speed?

You know what I mean? It's in their DNA. Really? I always thought the Olsen twins were younger than me growing up because I watched Full House. They're older than me this entire time. It blew my mind. I was like, wait, what?

I was like, how did they lap me? Kevin McAllister is 40 years old. That's wild. Old ass. Me and my buddy Tanner in college, they called us the Molson twins. Oh, that's sick. Because you couldn't find us without one. Y'all just pounded Molson?

Just consistently just pounding. What's the over- one. Y'all just pounded Molson? Just consistently just pounding. What's the over-under on the amount of bars that serve Molson in San Marcos? Man. Catch us at the tap room, just eating queso burgers, just slamming Molson. Well, Brett has that restaurant in Houston that he goes

to that's essentially just a Canadian bar, and I think that would actually do pretty well with all the out-of-towners that come down to Austin. I feel like you could make a nice little killing doing a bar that just serves northern beers. When are we getting that Yingling plug? Yingling is here, by the way. You know that.

It's in a few different bars around town. It was all over New Orleans. Everywhere I went in New Orleans, I saw just Yingling everywhere. I still think it's overrated. I think it's a good, cheap beer, but I think people stan it too hard. Well, you've got to understand, people from this side of the country, it's such a rare thing.

That's true. So when we get a chance to drink it, we just capitalize. You know what they always say, thy covets what thy can't have. Wow. We got Prophet Dave up in this bitch and in this scenario it's thy covets yingling because thee cannot have it it was written exact that's exactly right there's gonna be a there's gonna be a yingling hardell that comes into my dms and it's just roasting

me for that would be weird if i do that's disgusting i don't know digital come man if only we had some programming notes to go. Oh, look, it looks like we do. Dude, we started Worst Of yesterday. Oh my god, that's crazy. Patreon.com slash Circling Back Podcast. Every Tuesday up until spooky season, we're doing Worst Of. We might mix in a couple other

episodes of something wild that I think the listeners will like, but we're doing primarily Worst Of stuff. Got some great stories yesterday and got even more submissions. If you have more, email worstof at washmedia.com or head over to Wash Media and fill out the form on the Worst Of part of the site. We're also doing Friday voicemails on Thursdays. And you can get 10% off if you subscribe yearly instead of just doing it monthly. Also, head over to YouTube.com. Not sure if everyone's aware of this, but, yeah, we have a new studio set up.

And I have to say, our episodes look beautiful now. We look very handsome on screen. Definitely go check out our episodes on there if you haven't already youtube.com slash washed media we have every every episode that we record is up there in its entirety and go tell a friend about the podcast don't watch today's though i think i messed up my mustache trying to trim it this morning what's your what's your what's your mindset when you go into trimming your mustache? Well, the last few days it's been try to get this done before Rhodes starts losing his shit. Because I'm now on Rhodes duty, my son, while Alyssa's at work.

Do you trim it every day? No, but I do it every couple days. I just don't like it when it starts flipping out. And so I was doing it, and the next thing you know the kid's losing his shit you look great man yeah don't zoom in on me randy remember that's that super sassy weed dealer in new orleans your mustache made me think of that guy why was he so sassy he hated you yeah why did he single me out this dude rolled up on a schwinn and tried to sell his joints. We were like, nah, man, we're good. He just got real sassy.

He got mad because nobody wanted to smell him. He's like, no, smell it. And Will was just like, no, we're fine. He had a little sassy attitude. But he took it all out on Dave. Yeah, Dave was his target. You know, I think he had a little crush on you. Yeah, I do too.

I was looking pretty dope. What day was that, Saturday? Saturday. Just a sass machine from that guy. Yeah, I honestly was not even a part of the conversation. He just turned to me and went in on me. I want to be like, man, do you struggle with sales, your business here, because you're so sassy and rude to your would-be customers?

But he just wheeled off. I think we received an all-time dumb review. Ooh, let's hear it. This is from SlickestWillie69. Okay. I did not leave this review. Some people do call me SlickestWillie69, but I did not leave this review. Okay.

It says, DVD player review. So this review is for a Panasonic VHS player I purchased from your website. The player arrived promptly and in good condition. I was excited to finally have the opportunity to watch the tapes of two guys, a Girl, and a Pizza Place I recorded years ago and have greatly missed. He just goes on for like 200 more words talking about how he wants to watch Two Guys, a Girl, and a Pizza Place on this new thing. Is that a real show? Didn't they change the name to just Two Guys and a Girl? Yeah, they got rid of the Pizza Place, unfortunately.

That's how you know your show's doing well, when you change the name. Yeah. Which we did. I think it went up against Dharma and Greg. I was a Dharma and Greg guy. She was a real free spirit. Greg was frat. He didn't get enough credit

for being just frat. Was he? Damn. Yeah, dude. He wore a suit like everywhere. I didn't know it was a real show. We also got a review from Maddie B.

So that guy just posted a review to the wrong thing or he's just trying to be funny? No, he's just being funny. Oh, okay. We got one from Maddie B. So that guy just posted a review to the wrong thing or he's just trying to be funny? No, he's just being funny. We got one from Maddie B and it just says my hooves get great. I don't know if that's the real Maddie B that left that, but you gotta think it was. It's gotta be. Doesn't he have a beard now?

That's what I've heard. I haven't seen this beard. I don't know if I want to. Let's look it up. Do he and someone else's Dauda still have things going on? Me and your Dauda. I hate that so much. Why?

It's heat. How many Twitter followers do you think Matty B. Raps has? Like 825,000. I was going to say 2.5 million. 796.9K. Pretty good, Dylan. Let's ride. Price is right rules.

We both lose. Who said he has a beard? I'm not seeing it. I don't know. It's ride. Price is right rules. We both lose. Who said he has a beard? I'm not seeing it. I don't know. It's like patchy. I mean, it's a better beard than I could grow, I'm sure. Who's got the patchier beard, Dylan or Matty B? Okay, let's not play that game.

No, it's our new segment, comparing Dylan's beard to high schoolers. He kind of looks like a young Chet Hanks. Okay. Okay, I'm looking at a very recent picture of him on Instagram. He does have some scruff. He's got a little 5 o'clock shadow. Love that. The kid's growing up, man. Love that. I'm looking at a very recent picture of him on Instagram. He does have some scruff. He's got a little 5 o'clock shadow. Love that.

The kid's growing up, man. Love that. The kid's just getting older. Damn. God. Hey, let's hear from our presenting sponsor today. Yeah, let's hear about it. We all shop online. We've all seen that promo code field taunt us at checkout,

but thanks to Honey, manually searching for coupon codes is a thing of the past. Honey is a free shopping tool that scours the internet for promo codes and applies the best one that it finds to your cart. It's got over 30,000 stores online that range from tech and gaming products to popular fashion brands to even food delivery. You guys want to know how this works? It's one of the simplest things I've ever done. I mean, I know how it works because I use it every day,

but please tell the people how it works. You don't even have to do anything. It does it all for you. So imagine that you're just shopping at one of your favorite sites. You're in your browser. And your browser is just humming because this doesn't slow it down at all. Just want to be crystal clear about that for people worried out there. And then when you check out, the Honey button drops down.

And all you have to do is click Apply Coupons. Wait a few seconds as Honey searches for coupons it can find for that site. And if Honey finds a working coupon, you just watch the prices drop. I'm always mashing that Honey button. And if Honey finds a working coupon, you just watch the prices drop. I'm always mashing that Honey button. I wouldn't be surprised if Honey at this point has saved me north of $600, $700. No joke.

No, no joke at all. And it's the easiest thing in the world. It is the most simple, straightforward sponsor that we have, and I absolutely love it. It's something that I will not check out without even checking first. Absolutely. And even if you forget, it's got your back because it's auto. Yeah, it's like, oh shoot, I was going to buy this whole press like an idiot. Dude, that's great.

I know. Dave, guess what? It is great. You act like I haven't been using Honey for the last half decade. Is that facts? I've been using it for a minute. You said that you've saved like $600-$700. The over 17 million members have saved over $2 billion. That's more than you.

Do I look surprised at that number? Because I'm not. If you don't already have Honey, you could be straight up missing out on free savings. And it's literally free and installs in a few seconds. And by getting it, you'll be doing yourself a solid and supporting this podcast. We'd never recommend something we don't use. So you can get Honey for free at joinhoney.com slash circling back. That's joinhoney.com slash circling back.

You guys know us. We've never strayed away from an animal attack on the TL. Can we just skip to the pre-workout stuff? No, we've got to make the people wait, dog. Sorry. Can't you just respect the rundown? Yeah, can you respect this nice young lady who got bit by an alligator? Everyone's going to fast forward to it anyway.

She didn't just get bit. Randy. Where was this uh utah this is truly scary okay no don't give us another gator attack david no uh yeah so this is a child's birthday party and uh there's many people have probably seen this i think this dropped monday after we recorded but uh let's just do a little play by play here there's the trainer she's with her gator and it seems to be encroaching in her space she's We've seen this. I think this dropped Monday after we recorded. But let's just do a little play-by-play here. There's the trainer. She's with her gator, and it seems to be encroaching in her space. She's giving it the stop command, and he's got the hand.

His name is Darth Gator, for real. And yanks her into the water. Luckily, it's shallow, and just immediately starts death-rolling her hand. Oh, my gosh. Dude, the roll. She ate that roll, though. Like, she ate that tackle. Why is Joe Ingles, why is the kid in the Joe Ingles jersey just, like, affixed?

Like, he cannot stop looking. Because he was in shock, dude. It took the parent too long to get the kids away from the scene. Is the kid in the jersey low-key smiling? He got snatched so hard. I say let the boy watch. I think the kid might be smiling, but I think the kid is just confused about what's actually going on here. He thinks they're just playing?

Maybe. Maybe. This is terrifying. When that thing starts rolling, I thought it was game over for this young lady. What I took away from this video initially was the fact that it might have been a little too chill. It's like they didn't want to alert the kids that this gator attack was going down. And so instead of being like, holy shit, they got her. They were just like, oh, we have a problem over here.

Which I think is the move. You don't want to scar them emotionally. The kid in the Pacers jersey is scarred either way at this point. He was watching. He's never going to be able to go to a live animal exhibit ever again, I don't think, after this. How calm the lady seems to be, and there's no volume, but how calm she seems to be is noteworthy here.

She absolutely handled this about as well as you possibly could have. And the guy, obviously a hero, got on the Gators' back. That's a random dude, Bob. That's just a dad. He's on his king shit. Kind of looks like Ted Cruz. The guy in the PFG. What a stud.

Don't do him like that. What an absolute stud. Dude in the PFG is just kind of watching. Like, he's trying to get some of the clout from saving, and he's not really doing anything. Yeah, but he's definitely going to be telling this story at the bar, like, later today. Okay, there.

He got her out. He pulled her out. By the way, the young lady's name is Lindsey Bull. Shouts to her. That's a strong name okay here's now he has yet so he's on top this guy jumps in and jumps on the alligators back and now she got she got out so he is just on top of the alligator not knowing like what to do you need an exit strategy here which this thing is squirming and the tail is very dangerous too that could break

your ankle break your leg are his shoes waterproof like Carl's in Bachelor in Paradise? I think he's got Yeezums on, actually. I don't think this 55-year-old man has Yeezys on. He might. He's not you. Why is he wearing a reflective vest? That's what I'm wondering. Because, dude, you got to announce that you're there when you go. He's just getting a fit off in whatever this is.

We're going to find out that that's what triggered the gator. Oh, my gosh. What a hero. Do we have an update on how her hand is doing, Dave? We do. She was discharged from a Utah hospital Tuesday, and it appears she has a broken wrist, which makes sense, as it was death rolled, broken thumb, multiple fractures,

some lacerations, but she's not losing it. She's not losing the hand. That's big for everybody. A happy ending, which makes this video not difficult to watch. TMZ has graphic photos of it. I have not looked.

I'm good on those. Yeah, I'm good. I'm good. I don't handle blood very well. She seems like she's in good spirits. So say you work at one of these exhibits. Okay? You're sitting around the conference room table, drinking your morning coffee,

and they're like, hey, we got a new gator in here. And do people just start volume shooting names? Wait, what was the exhibit? We should do somebody getting the carpent. They're pimping the alligator. Okay. They're pimping the gator, yeah. We should do real or fake alligator names.

I would love to be a part of the committee that gets to name the animals that are being brought to these exhibits. I think I'd feel bad for the animals, but I still want to be the one that's sitting there naming them. I think Darth Gator is hard. The guy who came up with Darth Gator was like, yeah, I absolutely murdered that. Now he feels bad about it, though. It turns out that Darth is a savage. They're not going to kill this thing, are they? It was just being a gator.

Yeah, you can't kill a gator for being a gator. I think they normally let the guy who discovers it name it. Like you get the gator and you get to do it? It's your name now. Under the right conditions, they can live forever. Yeah.

They can grow to be the size of an AT&T stadium pretty much. But you've got to feed it a lot, so it's not going to happen. Can I at least just read the explanation for why we were talking about this? Wasn't this from Touching Base Days? I feel like this comes up like twice a year. It does.

This is why crocodiles do not die. Which, by the way... They do die, though. No, I don't know. This says, Crocodiles have no such thing as old age. A seven-year crocodile is as good as a 70-year-old one in terms of agility and other life parameters. Aging has no effect on them.

Although they can't die from natural aging, they also can't live forever. Nature has a way of killing them. The way they die is out of starvation or if they contract a disease. My secret is I smoke an American Spirit cigarette and have a Nature valley bar every morning what's yeah what's their secret it's longevity i do a shot of vermouth and whatever micah brought to the bachelor party for net that is such shit by the way no it's the best i do a shot of frenet every night i'm bringing a bottle before i get in bed i'm bringing a bottle to pierce's crib for uh hell yeah you are Why did my old man sound like Pierce from The Bachelor Party? Who nobody knows who that is.

Dude, it's Pierce. We might go live with Pierce Saturday. It's P-Dawg. The P-Man. I still don't understand how Hook got eaten by the alligator when the alligator was just a clock. Like, it doesn't make sense to me. Was the alligator alive when it fell on him? I don't know, but like, either way, it's a clock. It's just

like, what's the problem here? Dylan's never seen Hook, huh? But it's been a minute. I don't remember that scene. It's a metaphor, because time comes for us all. Wow. I'll be honest, Hook, it's okay. Dude, shut off. That's an all-time kids movie, dude. Top five.

Actually, no, not even top five. It's Mount Rushmore kids movies for me. Dustin Hoffman? D2. D2 is my number one kids movie for myself. Hook is probably number two. And then I think I got to mash that Aladdin button. Aladdin is so mid. Oh, no, no.

Certainly not, my friend. Certainly not. I saw the one with Will Smith. No, I'm thinking of the Genie one. Was that Aladdin? The new live action Aladdin? Yeah. Yeah, I didn't watch that.

It stinks. I did. It wasn't bad. I have not seen one live action Disney movie that I've found entertaining yet. Not one. For me, there wasn't enough live action. I turned off Pocahontas. Wow.

Watched the old one instead. I'd never seen the old one until this year. Because you didn't like the message that it was putting out? I don't even know. They just didn't have songs. You can't recreate Pocahontas and not put the songs in there. That seems weird. I've never seen Frozen.

Honestly, the songs are really good, but I think it's kind of a mid-movie for me. But I don't think I'm in the demographic. Cold never bothered me anyway, David. Isn't there a dude in there that only wears shorts? I don't know. It'd be great if there's a dude in Frozen that just wears shorts because his legs don't get cold. Olaf is straight up one of the most likable characters ever. Same guy who doesn't even wear sunscreen.

He's like, dude, I don't ever get burned. Nah. Big ups to Olaf, though. Oh, I meant Mulan, not Pocahontas. Randy just corrected me and I apologize. Wow, you're an idiot. The Mulan one didn't have it. What's your problem? It's like you blow every segment.

I wasn't a big Mulan or Pocahontas fan. That was kind of after my Disney fandom started dying down a little bit and I started watching more D2. I thought the sequel to Mulan was a little tough. Mulan or Pocahontas fan. That was kind of after my Disney fandom started dying down a little bit, and I started watching more D2. I thought the sequel to Mulan was a little tough. Mulan Rouge. It was like a little bit aggressive. That's so stupid. I'm not showing my kid this.

That song was on TRL all the time. Dude, Maya. For a minute there. Woo! What was that song? Real Lady Marmalade?ade no the other one with pross ghetto superstar wasn't she in that that was a that was a big trl phase that was awesome that was awesome that introduced me to like a whole different genre of stuff i was just like this is great you remember the vmas and they performed it and odb almost rest in peace by the way, almost walked into the pyrotechnics and they had to pull him back.

He was almost torched live on stage. Kind of how Pepsi did Michael. I don't know what you're talking about. He filmed a Pepsi commercial in the late 80s I think. Jackson? Jordan?

Scott? Which Michael? Michael Jackson. He would have melted. Because he had so much plastic surgery. Oh, I see. Yeah, I got it. It was a shitty joke. I don't have anything else here.

I'm just, I'm checked out at this point. Very sick, yeah. So I'm glad this young lady's okay. Yeah. Lindsay Bull. We probably wouldn't have covered it had she not been okay. No, I wouldn't have watched it. I'll watch a death roll if there's no limbs lost or life.

That's the only circumstance in which I'll watch a death roll. Are you bringing the homie to any gator exhibits anytime soon? Does he own gators? what do you mean what exhibit okay stop you ran that one back stop it's two and like five minutes i can't wait till the day that you meet you meet exhibit in a las vegas elevator and you make a joke you make a joke to him like, I didn't know the exhibit was open today. And he's going to be like, shut up. He probably prefer that than me bringing up Pimp My Ride. Like, okay, at least it's something different.

I feel like at this point, if you bring up Pimp My Ride, it's just like the Jim Rome interview with him. He's like, say it one more time. Was that Jim Everett? Will you Pimp My Ride? He just comes across the table. He just tackles you. Say it one more fucking time.

Will you put a fish tank in the back of my car? Oh, it's funny. Oh, it's funny. What are you looking at? Are you looking at pre-workouts over there, David? Dave, are you cheating? What would I even? I'm just saying, if you do, I will come across this table.

I will crawl across this table. Damn it. I'm not. I promise. I was looking at trending topics on Twitter. Okay. That's fine. You're allowed to do that.

And look, when I talk about these, you can look up this specific one, but don't go wandering. I won't even do that because I know you're going to get all. I'm not going to do it. Brings them up together sometimes. Hey. Hurts no one. What's up with this time travel TikTok, dude? Are we covering this or are we not covering this?

I think he was wrong. Why? Hold on. You're saying that the dude didn't time travel from 2741? Did he time travel or not? 2714, Will. No, it doesn't look like it. There's a guy on TikTok apparently claiming to be from the future, 2714, Will. No, it doesn't look like it. There's a guy on TikTok apparently claiming to be from the future.

2714, as Will said. Well, that's way in the future. Yeah, and I like that his platform of choice was TikTok. That's the best way to reach us. I've always kind of thought that, like, for me, if I was to time travel, I think I'd go back to 1738. Why is that? What was going on? Dude, I i don't know i just think that'd

be the move i heard 1738 was a movie would y'all go forward or backward that's a hard question so that's that's my number one time travel question for myself i'm not going forward i'm not gonna dude you think it might be bleak yeah no well mate probably but like everybody's gonna be way more advanced than me. Yeah. I'd rather show up somewhere and blow minds than show up somewhere else and just be like complete. I feel like my anxiety would just make me cower. I want to be the dude who shows up in like 1200 with a slinky and just blows their little

fucking dicks off. You would bring a slinky. Not like a laptop. I worded that poorly. No, I would bring a slinky. I would start sending them to the laptop and use all the Wi-Fi. What am I going to do? Show them like Minesweeper?

I would bring them 5G. How do you transport that? I'd bring a crew of some subcontractors and we'd put up some towers. You guys are all going to pile into your time travel machine. And they'll be like, bring all the materials

and construct a 5G tower. What the fuck are you doing? What is dude what is this guy doing i can't explain it to you now but you'll thank me one day you're gonna bring a whole crew construct towers correct and set up 5g correct wow i truly have no idea where i would go back in time to i don't either because if i only have one choice like'd know that I would just blow this. I just don't know what I would even do. I don't either. Like you could go back and fix a mistake you made in life,

or you could just go back to some amazing historical event that happened. I will be going back way more than 34 years. Yeah. Yeah, you kind of have to, right? You wouldn't want to waste it on a sporting event, though. Would you go back and prevent some terrible thing that happened? Like slap the bat out of that kid's hands? Like, dude, what's your problem?

Stop eating that bat, dog. Yeah, why are you doing that? This has a lot of ripple effects, my guy. I would go back and hold Steve bartman when he reached out to really yeah okay i like sports too cubs cubs are getting the next uh field of dreams game against the reds i think bartman's gonna go throw the first pitch probably not lame could you hit a dinger into the corn? It's a standard baseball field size, right?

Yeah. Have they recovered the balls that were hit into the cornfields? I've been wondering the same thing, actually. If I was a little kid, no. And BP, they take BP out there and just launch them into the corn. They're now children of the corn. I think they go get them. They've all emerged as 1940s baseball players?

Eh. That's quite the stadium, Sam. You you got to build a nice stadium here. Dude, there's the night. When did the 1919, uh, black socks, black socks.

Probably. Yeah. You know what happened with that team? They didn't, they cheat. They don't know. Then they, they had corks in their bat.

They threw the world series for bets, right? Oh yeah. For a batch saying we've got a big one riding on this. I probably would have known it, too. They were probably getting paid like shit. Yeah. Yeah, we didn't make much money back then.

Yeah, like, if this was their one opportunity to cash out, I think you'd just throw the World Series. I just want a little taste. They didn't have, like, Twitter and stuff to get clout on after winning a World Series. Like, they just wanted to get paid at that point. Whole squad got to eat, see? Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Let me get my beak wet. Yeah. There's a little nibble. We're going to turn up down in the old brasserie downstairs. One single crumb. Yeah.

Brasserie. Yeah. We got some hooch down there that we're going to be drinking later. What's brasserie? Stop by. Some hooch. Why do they call it hooch, man? What are they doing?

They got the hooch. He looked up Brasserie. That was right before It's an informal restaurant, especially one in France or model down a French one with a large selection of drinks. I'm not going to lie.

I didn't know what a Brasserie was when I said it, but that kind of works perfectly for what I was just talking about. It does. I never heard the word. There's a restaurant in Austin called Justine's Brasserie or something. Yeah.

I never really knew what that meant, but it puts out vibes of 1940s gangster accents. I would have guessed, like, lingerie store. Yeah, you would have. Perfect. Hair boy? Brassiere. Sure. It's just like a sexy word, really.

Brasserie? Yeah. That restaurant's the sexiest restaurant in Austin. It's making like a sexy word, really. Brasserie? Yeah. That restaurant's the sexiest restaurant in Austin. It's making me brass right now. Okay. So are we time traveling or not? So this guy didn't time travel just to get on TikTok. Yeah, it turns out he had some prediction August 11th,

and it's now August 18th. But he said something amazing happens on August 11th. So that was, was what a week ago what happened we had a good pod is that what happened we don't know maybe he was talking about michael's bachelor party that could be it he said there will be a mysterious war on earth in 2025 i mean that's that's that's so generic that's a layup that's yeah like oh yo there's gonna be a weird war cool

that's just life yeah he said Atlantis will be found in the year 2022 okay hold my breath for that one this dude's watching too much Little Mermaid

what platform would you come back on if you were from the future Peach yeah or Cyber Dust I would probably just i would just show up on slack and like some random company is it sad that we're too old to like relate to the all the yik-yak stuff that's been on on the tl lately so you can't a problem right i guess yeah it sounds like the worst thing ever and apparently i saw somebody on twitter saying that like an anonymous rumor

spreading board is what it is it's a? It's like a user data grab. They're just bringing it back to get people to sign back up. I thought that was just a shitto tweet. No, I think Omar. Oh, it's like an actual thing? No, that's actually what happened. Oh, okay. I'm probably getting a lot of that wrong.

I believe it. But we do that a lot here, so. I mean, yeah, it sounds like just an absolutely unhinged next door. It makes me think of what Matt Felser did when he was at Penn State. What was that? He was our old tech guy. Yeah, our old tech guy. Now he works for Facebook.

So what he did was, it wasn't Yik Yak back then, but it was a similar forum where you could just anonymously post shit about people, and people would say awful things about other students. It was just unbridled rumor spreading. Yeah. So Matt Felser hacked into it, took it down, and put his little coding into it and relaunched it. But when he relaunched it,

he made it so where he could see everyone's information that was posting. Oh. And then he released he like took it down again and then posted everyone's name like real name next to the shit they were saying about people so when it used to be anonymous it was now attached to your name and he got in a lot of trouble dude good for him though good for him though and i think i think as we've learned like what he probably did that in 2000 like 10 11 12 like around that time yeah like if we've learned anything now it's that like anonymous stuff on the internet is like definitely not the move at this point i remember madison talking

about hiring him and he was like yeah when i brought him in for an interview i had to make i was like he talked to him he's like so if things don't go well for you here, you're not going to, like, bring us down, like, hack into our shit, right? And everything worked out. But the dude was pretty capable. I didn't realize he did that. That's bad bullshit. It made it. Actually, TFM covered the story before we hired the guy.

It was kind of a. Worlds collide. Yeah. Yeah. kind of a world's collide yeah yeah i would uh again i would i would just i would like to be i would go to the future then come back to say that i am from the future because technically that's correct and i would show up in like uh i don't know like a texas instruments company slack and just drop like some fire gifs like the simpsons gifs like the like the the grandpa walking out of the and then turn him back around and walk him back into the that would be me damn hey what's he trying to tell us dude i didn't know you were a savage

oh my god dude that's an epic gift dude that's so epic or i would just start the man on fire one somebody will respond you on the internet today sir dude i would appreciate that one. Can we talk about our friends over at Headspace? Wouldn't it be great if there were a pocket-sized guide to help you sleep, focus, act, or just be better? Well, I got news for you guys. There is. And if you have 10 minutes, Headspace can change your life.

Headspace is your daily dose of mindfulness in the form of guided meditations on an easy-to-use app. It's one of the only meditation apps actually advancing the field of mindfulness and meditation through clinically validated research. So whatever the situation, Headspace can really help you feel better. If you're overwhelmed, Headspace has a three-minute SOS meditation for you. If you need some help falling asleep, they even have wind-down sessions for their members that they swear by. And for parents, Headspace even has morning meditations you can do with your kids.

I think Fritz and I might need to start getting meditations off. You know I like to meditate. The road man needs that in the morning. He needs that as I'm trimming my mustache. You just toss on a Headspace and call it good? Just give me three minutes. That's all I ask. Headspace is great.

It's one of the most aesthetically pleasing apps I've ever seen, which also brings some mindfulness to me while I'm actually using the app. It's wonderful. If they sent me merch with that logo, if they sent a dad hat that just said Headspace in that orange circle, I would wear it. Oh, I would absolutely wear that. I want people at the bar to know that I put out meditation vibes. You're just a chill-ass dude.

Yeah. They know that I put my mind first. And your mind is right. Yeah. Yeah. God, his voice on here is just perfect for calming you down. It's just perfect. They're backed by 25 published studies.

You aware of that? 600,000 five-star reviews. Over 60 million downloads. That's way more downloads than we have on this very podcast. Wait for beginners. If you're looking to get in the game, this will walk you through it step-by-step, and it's so easy and so effective. If you're worried about your attention span, just try one one of the three minute ones and see what it does for you

i guarantee it helps headspace makes it easier for you to build a life-changing meditation practice mindfulness that works for you on your schedule anytime anywhere you deserve to feel happier and headspace is meditation made simple go to headspace.com circling that's headspace.com circling for a free one month trial with access to Headspace's full library of meditations for every situation. This is the best deal offered right now. So head over to Headspace.com slash circling today. It's time. Where are me and Gif?

Oh, that's the one I'm dropping. Yeah. What does this mean? I'm just going to post the video of the dude walking into the room i love that gift so much it's so good dude why is he getting like the most fire courtroom fit off he is he is i don't have the guts to wear where uh that's my courtroom appearances the cockiness from his courtroom appearance for harboring a terrorist by the way i looked into that's what it was? Sometimes you've got to harbor terrorists.

I don't know. I thought he was trying to sell dime bags or something. Can I just say this? I would go back in time and stop Matty B from doing 9-11. Okay. That's a good one. Thank you for that. I want to put that out.

That's a good one. All right, folks. That's what we've all been waiting for. It is time for Real or Fake Pre-Workouts, Volume 2. So we did this the first time. And, of course, pre-workouts, the branding is a bit aggressive. What do you have? Sorry.

I'm in my family group text, and one of the young infants that we have in the family group text right now just had a hilarious photo where he accidentally pooped on the carpet. It's just kid stuff these days. You know what it is. Wow. Wasn't Fritz.itz of course not fritz would never do that he would okay he would he likes pooping boy those poops after they start eating solid food stop dude or i guess baby food or whatever oh my god my food i haven't gotten there yet are you doing these or what back to the real or fake pre-workout sorry i don. I'm talking about baby shit over here.

We're trying to make it harder for Timo to clip. Baby shit might be a good one, actually. Actually, yeah, that's not bad. So the branding for pre-workouts, pretty aggressive. We talked about apeshit cuts last time. We talked about meth lab. Those are two real ones. Just to give you an example of how these go.

Dragon cum, not real. It will be at one point. I've put together a list of 20-plus pre-workout names, some of which are real, some of which are not real. Fake. Hold on, let me pull up my list. Watch the Google fingers, all right? I'm not going to Google shit.

You know I don't do that. Are you guys ready for Real or Fake Pre-Workouts volume two we've been ready okay number one feral pre feral pre there's no way that's real there it can't be real is it spelled feral like a feral hog or like perry for real lead singer of porno for pyros like a feral animal feral hog or like Perry Farrell, lead singer of Porno for Pyros? Like a feral animal. Feral hog, feral cat. Feral pre. Is it like Will Ferrell? I just explained. Is this made of Will Ferrell's pre?

It could be. You got a fucking dart in your neck. Feral pre. How many times are we going to reference old school? I say it's fake. Feral pre? That's real. Feral pre is a real pre-working.

God, dude. Randy, can you keep score, please? Or somebody. What do I win? You win some Farrell Pree. You get some of the apeshit cut stuff that they sent to us. I had some. Number two.

The results did shock me. The curse. The curse. The curse. I think the curse is real. I mean, I don't have any reason to think that it would be fake. By the way, assume everything I tell you is spelled the traditional way unless I specify. See, if this was the curse spelled with a K, then I'd be like, okay, this makes more sense.

But I'm going to go fake. What if this is like the imperious curse? Stop. Dave, is it real or fake? Stop. Fucking real. The curse is a real pre-workout. I mean, that makes – did I say – yeah.

You said fake. No, you're doing great, Will. Yeah, I'm 0 for 2. We're going to turn the heat up a little bit. Hey, Randy, stop keeping score. Number three, sewer sludge. Sewer sludge. I don't like the word sludge.

Which is like sludge you might find in a sewer i'm assuming here whenever i think of sewers and if i think of sludge i think of the teenage mutant ninja turtles and i think of them having there's just more ooze than sludge yeah exactly so they had the ooze and i'm thinking that i could see i could see parks being into like teenage mutant turtles right now and maybe that's affecting Dylan's thinking. I'm going fake. A lot of people often mistake that Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2, Secret of the Ooze, is not about Dylan.

Okay. Can I get a real or fake out of you? It's fake. You said fake as well? I said fake as well. It's fake. I got one right. I knew if I said fake enough times that I'd eventually get one right.

Hey, let's turn up the heat a little bit. Okay. Let's go from volume two to about five. If you're not watching at home, Dylan's turning up the heat. I'm turning an invisible knob that's presumably a volume knob. Okay. My ooze. Did you do that already? My ooze.

Number four, Jim Mollie. Jim Mollie. Wasn't that a CBS sitcom? Molly and Jim? Jim Molly. Of course, Jim is G-Y-M and not the name Jim. It's like a gymnasium. Okay?

Gymnasio. Jim Molly. Of course, Molly is a popular party drug among youths. Wouldn't know. Very hard to find in New Orleans. Wouldn't know. I wouldn't know that either, Dave. I'm sure that drug dealer that roasted you on Bourbon Street

would have given you some fake Molly if you asked him for it. It would have been like an ibuprofen with Raid Spray on it. Is Jim Molly a real or fake pre-workout name? I'm letting Dave lead this one. That's fake. My heart says that it's fake, but I really want this one to be real more than the other ones that you've named so far. Jim Molle is a real free-for-all.

If you work for Jim Molle or if you have any association with the company, I need to try Jim Molle before my next Peloton run. I know I said I wouldn't do it, but I've got to look that one up. I've got to see what that packaging looks like. Feel free to look them up. Oh, it's very aesthetically pleasing. Yeah, that's not bad. Yeah, we need to get some. Oh Oh, it's very aesthetically pleasing. Yeah, that's not bad. Yeah.

We need to get some. Oh, but it's Jim Molly Pro. The next one. Sidewalk Cracker. Is that like a sidewalk slammer? Sidewalk Cracker. Cracker is spelled with an A at the end. So Crack A.

Sidewalk Cracker. I think this is fake because I think you had sidewalk slammer subconsciously in your head, and I think that's what you came up with. For those wondering at home, a sidewalk slammer is when you drink a 40. What do you do? You drink half of a 40, and then you fill the empty part up with a Four Loko. You chug that, and then you take the glass bottle for some reason and slam it on the sidewalk i love not recycling when i'm getting hammered so you're creating uh shattered glass what if

you slam it onto like a stack of pogs that'd be tight those are your sidewalk cracker that's real uh real sidewalk cracker is a real pre-workout. What? Just what? I take back what I said about wanting to like sit in a room naming animals. I want to sit in a room and name pre-workouts. Yes. Yes. We have the next one. Yes.

Coke fiend amped Coke fiend. Okay. Amped. Yeah. Some people bring their pre-workout to the gym in their bag. You can pull that out of your bag it is weird it is a bit weird you can't have that just pop it out you're probably dong out hey it's pre-workout not during workout take it before you go in there what are you doing thank you anyway coke fiend amped fake uh because I have doubted the affinity of these companies, the affinity that they have for drug use,

I've poo-pooed it in the past. I'm going to embrace it now, and I'm going to assume that this is real. Coke Fiend Amped is a fake pre-workout. Damn it. You got me. You got me by just driving home the drug stuff. I have no faith in these companies anymore. We have a bunch more, guys.

I'm ready. You ready? Domestic Terrorist. Okay. That has to be real. Domestic. Okay. That has to be real. Domestic. That has to be real. Oh, my God.

It's someone who's a terrorist, but they do it domestically. Sure. I can see them sitting there naming it and then just all laughing and being like, yeah, put that on the board. Yeah, just name it domestic terrorist. Domestic terrorist. Real. That's real.

It is a fake pre-workout okay okay that's probably good that's probably good the next one bull blood bull blood is it associated with raging bull lindsey bull could be no it's not associated with raging bull i don't there's like a few people who will find that funny the dividends that they can get you No, it's not associated with raging bull. There's like a few people who will find that funny. Dude, the dividends that they can get you. It's crazy. The pumps and then the dumps.

I like bulls. Always wanted to go to a bull fight. Kind of want to do running of the bulls at some point. I'm going to go all in on bull blood. I'm going to stay real. I got to tell you, you don't want to do running of the bulls. Dude, I think I do. What are you talking about?

I think I do. My buddy did it. It looked lit. You would get trampled. Are you kidding? I'm nimble as hell. Most people don't get trampled. Yeah.

But if I'm the one that gets trampled, it's going to be a movie. Yeah. It will be. What did he say? I said real. Bull blood? That's real. It is real.

Good job. I would try bull blood. Jumping right into the next one. Blood thirst. Two bloods in the same sequence is concerning. Blood thirst. This seems like a line drive into left center. This might be the last time he put on the headphones. Sorry.

Secure reference. Yeah, I'm lost. Can you explain the reference so someone on Reddit doesn't mansplain it to me later? Here's the dude who had the hot mic as he was announcing the game, and then in the middle of his apology, there was a whole run. Castellanos. Yeah. that was how he started he said this might be the last time i put on these headphones was it did he get fired i think he's working he got fired but he got a new gig oh okay somewhere not as cool what was this called again he's on sub stack blood thirst blood thirst uh

i'm going real this seems this seems like it seems like a very normal name at this point for me yeah this doesn't even phase me this is real it's fake okay there definitely there has to be a blood thirst out there there has to be one out there there will be in the next year the next one psych ward love the idea i don't like how a lot of these like are a play on like losing your mind. Like mental illness. It affects millions of people, and it's like, no, this pre-workout. Psychotic is a real one.

We talked about it last time. Psychward's real. I'm going real as well. It is fake. See, what I like, something that's underrated with these, and I kind of wish you would include them, is the flavor of them. That's a whole other the apeshit cuts that I have are pink lemonade flavored

and I'm like this is so soft compared to being called apeshit cuts but there's also orangutan blood is it made out of actual orangutan blood

yeah that's one of the flavors I don't know if that's the move psych wait we did psych ward already yeah we did psych ward okay red rum which of course

is murder spelled backwards what movie is that from The psych ward red rum which of course is murder spelled backwards what movie is that from the shining red rum never saw it have you ever seen a show there i saw fish there a few years back yeah i tried to get some panic tickets but like it just didn't work out dude it sells out quick yeah it's hard are you talking about red rock you're talking about i don't get it yeah i did i did watch uh i did watch the scene from a few good men the other day it was on amc just speaking of like jack nicholson and the shining is that a goaded scene which one the you can't handle the truth it's it's up there it's up there it's incredible if that's on tv and you see that you're approaching that scene you're stopping every single time and watching jack

scream also for demi she looks pretty good she got the body of a goddess she a runner she a track star she's she's a runner she's a track star a few good men we should do real or fake adult film names. That's not bad. Red rum. Real or fake pre-workout? It's real. It's real. All right. Let's turn up the heat just a little bit more.

Oh, we're turning it up more. Let's go up to like a seven. Are you on your Traeger app just boosting it right now? I'm straight hitting, bro. Turning the invisible volume knob. Yeah, it's been hot in this studio ever since we got more lights in here.

I don't want to turn it up too much more. I'm hitting. All right, next one. Lumber Jacked. Yes. Yeah, it's been hot in this studio ever since we got more lights in here. Let's turn it up. I don't want to turn it up too much more. Turn up the heat. I'm pitting. All right, next one. Lumber jacked. Yes. Yeah, I love it. Absolutely love it.

Lumber jacked. I just want a picture of a jacked Al Borland, like a way too sexy Al Borland on the front of this thing. Busting out of his flannel. Yeah, he doesn't even have sleeves on the flannel at this point. They've ripped off. I'm going real. Lumber jacked.

That's too much of a layup. That's gotta be real. It's real. What is the branding of Lumberjacked like? Yeah, I want to look this up. Look it up, dog. You ready for the next one? Hang on, give us a sec. I need to see if there's a jacked out Borland on here.

I know, but... Oh, it's just an epic beard. Yeah, they didn't need to do the beard. This looks like a... This looks like an aluminum-free deodorant company. So Lumberjacked has both a pink lemonade flavor, but they also have a Freedom Pop flavor. That's their American one. Of course they do.

Freedom Pop. All right, here's the next one. You know I like that Freedom Pop. Sick and tired of these terrorists and when they're going to fade out. The next one is called Choke Me Daddy. There's no way. There's absolutely no way there's a Choke Me Daddy pre-workout. Choke Me Daddy?

No. There's just no way. There's no point in that. If you're getting choked, you can't actually ingest a pre-workout. Choke Me Daddy is the sister brand to Pump Me Daddy. There's no way. This is real. This does not exist in 2021.

No. So you're both saying fake. Yes. It's fake. Yeah, it had to be fake. I knew y'all would say that. You can't choke someone out. No, you can't.

Well, you can. Oh, you can. What you do in your own bedroom is your business. All right. Continuing on. Drone strike. Drone strike. Drone strike. So the concept behind this would be that you're taking the pre-workout

and it's drone striking your body and causing it to tingle and just go all remote location. Low key, I kind of get it. I do too. Oh, Dave is excited over there. Did you just flip your laptop over? Are you just furious right now? Just thinking about the Obama administration.

Did you take some drone strike before you sat down? I wish I did. I probably should have taken a pre-workout before this week's podcast slate. This is real. It's real. Drone strike is a fake pre-workout. Damn it, dude. That needs to be real.

Are you sure it's fake? Like, have you Googled the fake ones? Shout out to Randy. He came up with that one. That's good. Oh, wow. You didn't come up with all these you're just you're relying on you're gonna claim when it goes viral in the talk you're like that's my video and you're not gonna give any of us crowd i used a few from randy i just googled i just googled uh drone strike pre-workout and

yeah it's there definitely isn't one well there will be in about a month next Next one, Honey Badger. Honey Badger, which, of course, is the most aggressive animal on the planet. I thought he was a cornerback for LSU. He is. Wow. That's a sports reference. Go Tigers. Honey Badger, of course, in the weasel family. Weasel.

Weasel. I'm a weasel. That's exactly how they sound. that's exactly how they sound. That's exactly how they sound. Related to the wolverine, of course. Are wolverines not as vicious as honey badgers? I looked it up. They're very similar animals.

The honey badger is more aggressive. The honey one is aggressive, but it'll save you like 10% to 15% on internet purchases. No, I can guarantee the honey apple not badger you about their their discounts very good we call that added value in this folks they're gonna love that yep honey i'm gonna go real honey badger day real or fake if it's real they have to be licensing it because i'm from the actual honey Badger because surely he trademarked that. I'm going to say real. It is a real pre-workout. Randy, what's the count?

Do you have it over there handy? Dave is up by two. Dave is up by two. Very cool. I feel like I'm up by way more than that. Yeah, I do too. No, you're doing a good job keeping score, Randy. Animal Rage.

Animal Rage. What was the video game primal rage for some reason i just imagine animal rage having the exact same marketing as primal rage i feel like every person that grew up to be a branding person for a pre-workout company played primal rage on sega way too much that's one where you could scale the buildings no you it was pretty much just like a battle game like or you know between two guys. It was like Street Fighter with dinosaurs, right? Yeah, and it was really bloody. What game are you talking about? Because I know what you're talking about and I can't think of it. Maybe it's just a

King Kong game or something. Rampage? Rampage. Rampage. That's what they called our yearbooks because we were the Harbor Springs High School Rams. Get it? Rampage? Rampage. That's kind of clever. They should have done that for the school newspaper. I don't know why they didn't do that. Yeah.

Whatever. I'm going. What is it called? Animal Rage. Animal Rage. Real? It sure feels like a real one. Folks, it's real.

All right. We have six more to go. Okay. And Will's down by two. Okay. I need you to crawl your way back in. I'll do it with my animal rage. DK Metcalf, him, and run his ass down.

You ready? You're rooting against me, huh? Murder was the case. That's absolutely fake. Murder was the case. There's absolutely no way. It's real. I'm going with it.

Murder was the case. It's a fake pre-mortem. Damn it. So now I'm down three with's real. I'm going with it. Murder was the case. It's a fake pre-workout. Damn it. So now I'm down three with five left. I mean, what would that even mean? Like most of these you can kind of think like, oh, I guess why that's a pre-workout. Murder was the case, like you murder your workout. I don't know.

Yeah. I guess you're murdering it in the gym. All right. The next one is shredded titties. Okay. Titties is spelled T-I-D-D-I-E-S. Shredded titties. Thank you for explaining how titties is spelled.

Well, it's not a traditional way of spelling it. Dave, you have to go first. It's your head. Shredded titties. Is that a real or fake pre-workout? It's so egregious it's real. I'm going to go fake. It is a fake pre-workout.

Let's go. Down two, four to go. I think you're down one now, right? No, I was down three. Okay. Four to go fake. It is a fake pre-workout game. Let's go. Down two, four to go. I think you're down one now, right? No, I was down three. Okay. Four to go. The next one. Crack.

Crack is real. Crack. I'm going to, full disclosure, I've seen this one. This is crack. It's real. Crack is real. I've never seen it, so I get a point for that. There is a real pre-workout out there called crack.

I think I've seen crack. Which I assume people are taking. Dude, nothing better than a play on the crack epidemic of the 80s, man. Just so cool, man. Right, right. Yeah, very big. The next one, RPG, which stands for Ripped Pump Pumped Gains. Instead of Rocket Propel Grenade.

Instead of Rocket Propel Grenade. Instead of rocket-propelled grenades. Ripped, pumped gains. Ripped, pumped gains. It has to be real. If this is fake, this is the most creative one you guys came up with. I was going to say real, but you should have let me go first. Real. It is fake.

Oh, that's a good one. Who came up with that one? Randy got that? Randy. That's good. He is so proud of himself. No, he should be proud of himself for that. That's a really good fake Who came up with that one? Randy got that. Young Randy. That's good. He is so proud of himself. No, he should be proud of himself for that. That's a really good fake one.

It is good. We should private label that. We have two more. Okay. Harambe Blood. Harambe Blood. Way too soon for that. Harambe Blood is the deceased silverback gorilla who was put down after an unfortunate zoo incident. David?

The Onus. Harambe Blood. I guess it's not the Onus on you. Harambe Blood. That's fake. I'm going to have to go real. I have no choice but to go real in order to claw my way back. Harambe Blood is a real pre-workout.

Let's go. I'm amazed at, I'm surprised that Harambe isn't trademarked in some way by somebody. If you're the Cincinnati Zoo, aren't you trying to trademark that so that no one can ever do anything with it and not draw attention to you? We should release a shirt called the, it says like the Cincinnati Harambe is on it. Dude. What if we did like a play on Trump and just did make Harambe alive again? Ooh, that plays.

Okay. That was a good shirt. Thank you. That shirt stunk. No offense. That was the best one of the bunch. Thank you. That's not saying much though, David. Correct. It's not. Correct. All right. That was the best one of the bunch. Thank you. That's not saying much, though, David.

Correct. It's not. Correct. All right, the final one. What's the score? Do I need to get this one right versus Dave? Force him to answer first. That's the last one?

Dave is answering first. Overdose. The last one is overdose. Is that a real or fake pre-workout? One is overdose. Is that a real or fake pre-workout? Again with the drug place. It's just unnecessary.

Yeah, I feel like this is just irresponsible branding, but I do believe it's real. I have to go fake. Overdose is a fake pre-workout. Let's go. Let's ride. This happened a couple times ago. Someone's going to find out Randy was keeping score wrong and after the fact, it won't matter.

I feel like I was up like five after the first hand. If you want to do a tiebreaker, I do have some real or fake energy drinks. No, we'll do a gold medal. No, we're saving energy drinks for a different day. We have to. No, a gentleman's tie. There are some very aggressive real or fake energy drinks that I have listed here. Ripped, pumped gains is still, that needs to be done.

Yeah. Randy, good stuff. Thanks for the help. Hey, great work, guys. Thank you, man. You know what it's time for? That's always a lot of fun to do. What?

I thought you were going to talk about that time traveler again. No, we're not doing the time traveler again. We might travel in time this weekend, because this is this weekend of fun presented by Bird Dogs. I don't think any of us are going to time travel this weekend. I don't know what Dylan's got planned. I felt like I did last weekend. Imagine time traveling in Bird Dogs.

They're like, what are those? Dude. Go back to like the 40s. Like, oh yeah, I got some Bird Dogs on. Oh, dude, can you imagine bringing a bunch of bird dog shorts back to the 40s? They'd be like, oh, my God, they make clothes that are not out of wool. They have a liner. A liner is built in.

They have a liner right here, see? They'd be like, what? They're my everything shorts. No underwear? Yeah. Yeah, these are my brasserie shorts. Yeah. From the brasserie to the boardroom.

These are my factory shorts. These are my brasserie shorts. Yeah. I'm going to wear these down to the swimming hole. Yeah. They got that built-in liner. Keep everything contained. Yeah.

My wife watches it real good on the outback. Hang dry. On the scrubbing board. Yeah. What does dry clean mean? Oh, my God. Bird dogs are going to be like, they literally say go off. They say go off script.

Yeah. Yeah. That was not part of the script. I promise you. Dude, they've got some great names for these new ones. They've got the Lunchman Larrys, the Art Fartknockers, the Captain South Americas, which are very chill, I might add. Wow.

Duffy the Vampire Slayers. They even have something called the Tony Softnuts. Are you kidding? That's Dylan's mom. Oh, yeah, Tony Softnuts, eh? Dude, the comfort, the built-in underwear. They got it all. From the factory to the brasserie, dude, everyone's wearing Bird Dog shorts.

They even stole Lululemon's designer. They were like, no, player, you're coming with us. They put him in the back of the Model T, say. I'm going to bring him down to the boys to wear at the bathhouse. Yeah. You don't work for us. You're sleeping with the fishes. We'll have to give them a branded read after this. No, no, no. I'm so confused. All the names down at the brothel. Nah. Yeah. You don't work for us, you're sleeping with the fishes. We'll have to give them a brand new read after this.

No, no, no. He's so confused. All the names down at the brothel love them. These are the perfect sports for doing literally anything. Beach, golf, brunch, pool, factory, brasserie.

They're the short shorts of the summer. Bird Dogs is back with one of their famous giveaways. You guys remember the nunchucks that they gave away? Oh, yeah. Well, now they're doing

something even more wild. Go to birddogs.com, enter promo code STEAM, and they'll throw in a free Bird Dogs whistle tip football. It's like those Nerf Vortex Howler footballs with that whistle when you throw them. Hold on. Go deep. Timo's got it.

Yeah, Timo's got one. Timo's throwing to Timo. Hold on. Oh, it worked. It worked. He fucking honed that thing. Let's ride. Timo.

That's birddogs.com, promo code STEAM, and boom, a free Bird Dogs whistle tip football with your pair of Bird Dogs. You will not take these things off. I promise. All right. I'm going to throw it back really hard. Ready? Whoa, dude.

Dude, you just blew Timo out of the building. I think I was laughing during the most important part of that, which is the URL and the code. That's birddogs.com. Promo code steam and boom. A free Bird Dogs whistle tip football with your pair of Bird Dogs. You will not take these things off. I promise you. I didn't know Timo had a howitzer on his right shoulder. I didn't either.

He's got a better arm than me. This is not good for me. Dylan, what are you doing this weekend? Thanks for asking, Will. I told you I had that soccer game tonight. I forgot you're going to the Austin FC game. Not exactly a weekend event, but it is a fun thing I'm doing. I'll report back tomorrow.

I think based on how you got the tickets, based on the fact that they're corporate tickets, and I know what company they're from, I think you're going to be in a nice little situation. I think it's going to be a lituation. There's a nice, I'm not going to name her, but there's a nice backer who works at the stadium. If you're in a corporate kind of situation, I think

you might be seeing her. Very cool. Friday is going to be probably low-key. I have parks that day. I'm just going to keep a low pro and just kind of chill out, I think. Might go do a dinner somewhere. I'm not really sure. Saturday, we have a little couple shower situation to get to for our friend Micah Weiner.

Dude, Micah's just cucking our weekends. Leonard Frenette, as I call him. He's taking all my – That's good. That's not a bad day. It's really good. Thank you. Yeah, that's pretty good.

Yeah, so Saturday we'll be doing that at our buddy Pierce's house. Dude, P-Dawg. The P-Man. Does he even know how much play he's gotten on this pod? No. There's no way he's listened. Apparently at Lafitte's, this was, I think, after probably mid-second purple drink at Lafitte's,

apparently I just tipped back in my chair and just looked at him and said, we got to hang out more. Yeah. Yeah. Big Pierce guy. He's great. Turns out I'm hanging out with him this weekend. It's for the boys.

It is for the boys. The wives will be there, too. Yeah. Yeah. My Sunday's open. Not really sure what I'm doing. Yeah, I'll call you, man. Maybe we will be there, too. Yeah. Yeah. My Sunday's open. Not real sure what I'm doing. Yeah, I'll call you, man. Maybe we can meet up.

I'm good. Don't worry about it. I'll find something to do. Yeah, for sure. For sure, dude. Mm-hmm. What are you doing, Dave? My Saturday looks like the day.

I think I'm playing golf with you. Forgot we were playing golf together. Early. And then I think I'll be at Micah's thing we were playing golf together Early And then I think I'll be at Micah's thing Micah and Caitlin To celebrate the couple Kind of forgot we were playing golf together

Until this very moment Well I hope you didn't give away that fourth spot Didn't It's all you So you have a fourth spot available And you didn't even talk to me about it? No, Dave was the fourth spot

Dave had expressed interest earlier And so he was granted First right of refusal No, it's whatever first right of refusal it's whatever man after the last time we played lines do you really want to run it back there no i don't i mean there's a lot of major streets that are in play streets are talking like lake austin like enfield and lake austin they are on i mean we get it yeah they're on push watch i was actually taking, I took a walk along that hole yesterday, and I was kind of hoping I'd see a ball just fly over it. Yeah. Didn't work.

Didn't happen. I was looking for some new Pro Vs. Actually, shit, I got to buy golf balls. Damn. Not ideal. I've got some Kirkland balls if you want them. I kind of do. I'm desperate.

Yeah, pretty low key. I got to, you know, hang out. After last weekend, I'm'm not gonna drink any purple drink i don't know what if what if we show up at micah's shower and they have a frozen margarita machine they're making purple drinks i need to look up what's in that recipe and we need to do that at some point i'll do that for my housewarming party when we finally have it what was it called voodoo something i don't know. I don't remember. Dude, I got a big-ass weekend.

Whoa. I got a big weekend. Well, tell us about it. Well, I'm going to a jazz concert on Friday with one Micah Wine. You're actually going? Yep, we're going. His name's Marcus Hill. It's going to be very exciting. He's a Chicago

trumpet player. Very excited about this. Micah and I are going to go off there. You've got to think it's Going to be very exciting. He's a Chicago trumpet player. Very excited about this. Mike and I are going to go off there. You've got to think it's going to be a swanky cocktail attire kind of situation. That sounds pretty lit. Yeah, what are you wearing? I don't know. Well, unfortunately, I'm going to – not unfortunately, but I'm going to a birthday party after this that does have a dress code,

so I might be dressed a little ridiculous for the jazz show because I have to wear all white. So I'm going to be wearing all white to the jazz concert. Who's doing an all white birthday party? Ooh, it's ditties actually. Wait, you're talking about Friday?

Yeah. Oh yeah. And then, uh, Saturday golf with Dave going to that, uh, the shower in the afternoon. And then Sunday is,

is meant for lounging. So I will be watching some soccer all Sunday. You'll want to come over from the man. You game at 8. AM. Dude, for sure. I'll be there. Dude, United. Put some coffee on. for the Man U game at 8 a.m.? Dude, for sure. I'll be there.

Dude, United. Put some coffee on. I'm there. United. Right. It's going to be lit. I don't need to put coffee on. I have an espresso.

It's on demand. It's always on. Great. It's always on site. That's all I got. Are we doing Brett's Breaking News today? I don't think we're doing any Brett's Breaking News. I think he's doing business in whatever that room's called.

What's that room called, Randy? He's on his Grind Boy shit? The Alpha Finance Lab. He's in there. It's the business laboratory. He's in there just cooking. That's what he does. He cooks. He's got a couple Bunsen burners going, an Erlenmeyer flask, some tongs. It's a fun episode, man.

I might be living fajita loca this weekend on Sunday. I've been craving some steaming fajitas for a minute. Let's do Lupe. Maybe. But? It's closest to me now.

I was talking to him. Oh, I'm right here. I heard you. We'll text you, though. I heard you, too. We'll text you. Let's do Lupe, but let's do just the boys, and let's sit at the bar. Wow.

Is it on Saturday? That probably wouldn't go over well, given we were all gone last weekend. And given how much, yeah. The fajitas are quite expensive. I think we might get some shit if we just go out and blow a bunch of cash on the fajitas. They're very expensive, but they're very good. True.

The tortillas are about 10 feet tall. That's just big facts. All right, so it turns out this time traveler was not right. Really? Who would have thought that the TikTok time traveler was incorrect? There's some people who think this might be part of his plan because he's trying to throw us off because we won't be ready for the day when it actually does come. I'll look more into it. We can talk about it on the Patreon. Perfect. Let's not lose sight of the fact that there's a pre-workout out there called Gym Molly.

No, and if someone works for that company, I would like to try it. Someone works for that company. Yeah, someone to try it. Someone works for that company. Yeah, someone's producing it. Yeah. Shall we? We shall. All right. Bye. you