Circling Back - Depressing Meals & Stimulus Checks

Episode Date: March 30, 2020

Reviewing This Weekend in Quarantine, the most depressing meals we've eaten during quarantine, what we plan on spending our stimulus checks on, the first drink we plan on having in public, Tiger vs. Phil Part II, and Brett is back with his Breaking News. Support us on Patreon and receive weekly episodes for as low $5 per month: www.patreon.com/circlingbackpodcast (0:00) Fun & Easy Banter (10:01) Reviewing This Weekend in Quarantine (29:03) The Most Depressing Meals We've Eaten (34:45) Stimulus Check Spending (50:05) The First Drink We'll Have In Public (57:31) Tiger vs. Phil, Part II (1:05:05) Brett's Breaking News Hawthorne: www.hawthorne.co (CIRCLINGBACK for 10% off) Hims: www.forhims.com/steam --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/circling-back/message Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

all right we're back circling back podcast coming to you live from my apartment dave's house dylan's house, Brett's apartment, everywhere. Right in front of me on the screen, Dave Ruff. In these uncertain times, I'd like to wish everyone a happy Monday. That's big of you. Well, these times are pretty uncertain, Will.

How's Dylan doing right now uh you know pretty good sipping a nice cup of joe here i have a an ear infection which you know by comparison is not a big deal compared to what's going on in the world but i can't hear out of my right ear very well so that's a problem have you thought about going to the er anything for that uh no i had this weird this weird like dark green liquid build up in it last night it was okay not cool yeah i don't know your new house isn't haunted and you're having slime come out of your ears yeah it basically looked like slime not not ideal but we'll get through it it sounds like ectoplasm uh it could be sure honestly what you should do is you should just get a big

yeti full of rice and just dip your head in it for like five minutes you think that'll do it that should do it i think i think sally recommends that just get the coffee yeti and then just yeah just put your entire body in it you can lay down that'll fix everything i have going every issue i have going on with my body that's tight or just go full Van Gogh and just cut that thing off. No, I think I'll keep the ear for now because I might get better. So we'll see. If Van Gogh was a real one, he would have cut something off besides his ear. Like he wasn't doing podcasts.

He didn't really need the ear. Guys, I'm sorry. The Rand man just pushed the door open and it was really cute. He's never done that. He just popped his head in like, y'all recording? He knows when the content's happening it's like when you go live it's just ran man all the time i wish i could i wish he was remember when he was small enough i could pop him up in my lap remember we did that one video yeah yeah was he even small? I imagine him being the same size as he was. He was like probably 70 pounds.

They grow up so fast, man. Where does the time go? Hey, big game. Yeah, how's Magic Bullet doing? Wow. Hey, guys. It's nice to be on the pod. Welcome to the stream.

It's been a while. It's been a minute. It feels good to be back. What have you been up to the entire time? Have you been working or doing anything? Have you just been sitting in your apartment doing nothing? We had an IO come in this morning for Sunday. How about that?

We've been doing phones. I responded to we may have an article coming out that involves circling back and other associated podcasts. I've been on the phones. I've been having a good weekend here.

I'm getting tired of like the same spot. I think I'm going to be a walk guy at this point. We quarantined you earlier than a lot of companies quarantined people. I March, what was it? March 17th, 16th was my first day. We've never heard before anybody.

Yeah. Or tried to. to get our part. What did y'all do? Just hypothetically. I was going to say that the Royal y'all. Yeah. The Royal. Hey,

I can, I always worry about big game when he's wearing a hat. It means that he had an early morning. And it's not that he doesn't look good in a hat. It's just that like, I feel like something's gone wrong if he's not sporting the flow hair yet. It's not that he doesn't look good in a hat. It's just that I feel like something's gone wrong if he's not sporting the flow. Yeah, it's just I haven't showered yet. That's the deal. But you don't wash it

anyway. I use the shower in order to style it. Yeah. I don't understand these kids, man. Showering is not to wash the hair 90% of the time. It's to get the hair wet so that you can put it where it needs to be exactly it's to hit the reset button dylan did you get a haircut

somehow no i got a haircut like two weeks ago what do i do if i need a haircut throughout this entire ordeal we're gonna have to do it please please cut it yourself i'm good people are doing it i was like i'm trimming so i'm trimming my beard by myself obviously and i told her like if this if i make a bad move and i take out like a big chunk it's going to be on something that doesn't involve the mustache and so we're going to have to give the mustache a test drive for a while until the beard grows back in think about if this quarantine lasts like several more months three or four more months which it very likely could.

People are either going to let their hair just go wild or they're going to find a way to cut it themselves. Isn't that weird to think about? I might ask Teresa to come to our dog park and just cut my hair. I'll put this out there. I am going to let the beard grow. I am going to buzz my head either today or tomorrow. Whoa. If we're quarantined in June, I'm probably going to like buzz.

I'll never. Well, I can't picture you with a buzz. I can't either. I've never had it. I've never had it happen before, but like I, I get really anxious when my hair starts to grow out longer than it needs to

be. I look terrible. We had this conversation last night on a call duty, me, KJ and Klein played. And Klein said that I do not have a good dome for bicking my head. I think I agree.

I think he said that you do, Will. No. I don't know. I've never thought about it. Not to flex on everybody, but I don't think I'm going to have to worry about that at any point unless this quarantine lasts until August. Then I'm going to have to... I don't know. I feel have to worry about that at any point unless like this quarantine lasts until like august and then i'm gonna have to like i don't know i feel like you do have a good head for it i don't know i don't really know the the barrier of entry for having a good head to bick

your head i would pay money to see dylan with no hair oh it's not it's not a good look i don't have the hairline for it man not good like a dumb ass i've watched uh so i've watched several things but i started watching what people have been like just sending to me all the time because the guy in the show looks just like me and uh it's the english show or the the soccer show right yeah the english game yeah and i can now say after watching the show that i totally understand why people are saying that and every time he's on the screen i can't't take my eyes off him because I'm like, this is weird. Because he's so handsome? He's just such a snack.

It's so cuddly. He's also been in a lot of other things that I've seen but I've never really noticed it before, presumably because he didn't have a beard of this scale. Shout out to all my beard boys. I did a little trim last night. How's it looking? It looks good. Yeah, it looks fine. It looks great through this. I actually did a little trim last night. How's it looking? Yeah, it looks fine.

It looks great through this. I actually did a pretty good job. It's very full. Maybe it's the light. I feel like out of everyone, I have the worst camera on my laptop for everybody. It's just devastating to do Zoom calls with people and have the worst one.

How many Zoom calls are you doing? Dude, are you guys not just doing numerous Zoom calls a day with people? I've done zero so far. Are you serious? We do a lot of FaceTimes. Yeah. I don't think my family knows about Zoom. I might just need to take the reins here and show them what's going on.

My sister, she already knew a lot about Zoom, but she's been having us – we've been doing like family Zoom calls a few times a week. And then just like, yeah, sporadic. I don't know. I'm turning a lot of group texts into just straight up Zoom calls now. Do you have a 40-minute thing on Zoom though? No, because my sister's an administrator.

She's like a teacher. She gets to do the longer than so we get longer not to flex do randy's in the house what's up ran golly that dog oh look at that dog daddy oh should we talk about a Hawthorne real quick? Yeah. You guys know that smelling good is important and Hawthorne smells really good? It's pretty convenient. Getting Hawthorne cologne is also so easy. We've all gotten it.

Can someone explain how you get this stuff? You have to go online and there's like a little quiz. And it just asks you some basic questions. Sorry, my mic got muted. Yeah, it takes like one minute, two minutes. It's very quick and easy. I've been putting on Hawthorne here at my house just to kind of feel like a little bit of shed of normalcy. But yeah.

I mean,ave said it you go online you take a two-minute quiz and author tells you the two colognes that are best for you one for work one for play and the beauty of it it's totally risk-free with free shipping and free returns i mean the stuff is just great it uh it arrives at your place it's got some of the nicest packaging i've ever seen it makes me feel like i spent way more money on it than i did which is very convenient because it always feels better to feel like you spent more than to actually spend more. But it's just awesome. It takes your other cologne or scent preferences in mind when you fill out the survey and it sends them to you based on those.

But it's just great. Like I said, totally risk-free, free shipping, free returns. Check out Hawthorne at hawthorne.co. That's Hawthorne with an E and use promo code circling back to get 10 off your first order that's h-a-w-t-h-o-r-n-e.co and use our code circling back to get 10 off your purchase hawthorne.co might have been the first time i ever thought about my personal scent preferences by the way i know it's not something i'd given a lot of thought to oh i mean i you got dude it's it's part of you you got to think about that stuff you're right

um should we uh do you guys want to talk about what we did this weekend should we review this weekend in quarantine yeah sure i guess i'll kick it off. You always do, dog. Yeah, so I stayed quarantined all weekend. Not super tight. I did not have parks all weekend. I get them back here in a couple hours.

So it's just been lonely around the crib, man. So I've just been putting stuff away. It's still the final touches of settling in here. It's going pretty well. I also had to mow my lawn for the first time. Gosh, it's been years since I've mowed a lawn. I had a brand new lawnmower. I had to put all that together and go get gas and oil and all that shit.

I mowed my lawn. That was kind of exciting. How long did it take you? To mow it? Yeah. Oh, like probably 20 minutes. Not too bad. I was hoping it was going to be longer because I'm just looking for ways to fill up time at this point.

I did pop top to mow. Well, I had just gone on a run. So I popped top. I pulled a Dave. On the run, you popped top. Yeah, I went on a run. And when I got back from the run, I was already nice and sweaty. decided to mow then so i just i just kept the the top popped and uh right as i started mowing the neighbors across the street they a few neighbors started congregating

and they husbands and wives and kids were running around i was out there just with my shirt off i felt like kind of a douchebag but what are you gonna do were they congregating because you were mowing your lawn or was this for a different reason no i think the guy i think the guy across the street from me is kind of uh it's a hub of neighborhood activity he's like he's popular and so people started walking over and and they they dropped the tailgate down in the truck and they were just chilling did they invite you over yet? Did you partake? Not yet, but the guy next door to him came over the other day.

I was doing shit out in the driveway, and I talked to him for a minute. He's in banking. His name's Jordan. He's tall. He's nice. Of course he's in banking. Dude, you need to wear the face mask while you mow, the pollen in the grass that's not helping the ear that might be affecting my ear you're right yeah but there's no mask for your ear as far as i know so hey you could wear some headies i could yeah i could literally a

mask for your ears yeah anyway that was that was my weekend in quarantine how bored are we that the most exciting thing dylan did this weekend was shirtless lawnmow yeah you mowed more lawns this weekend than i have in my life so that's that's good for you you've never mowed a lawn in your life never oh not happy about that i probably should at some point you're a turf guy now yeah i mean when you got the turf you don't have to worry about it unless you have the tote you can mow mine whenever you want hey we'll do a video randy will come over too and we'll do a video of me mowing the lawn okay just like don't tell will anything about anything. He has to just do it himself. Will would start a lawnmower cold without gas or juice in the whatever it is.

The clutch thing? Yeah, primer. If you're going to try to roast me, at least know the part that you're trying to talk about. You return serve. It's the little red button that every lawnmower has. You just don't know what it's called. It's a choke. It's like the re-bought pump on the table. It's a choke.

Yeah. I know how to operate a choke because of boat engines. Oh, you know how to choke. Yeah. We all really know how. Oh. I mean, I didn't do much i didn't do much obviously i self-quarantined the entire time the only the only reason i left this weekend was to pick up food from a couple places what'd you go with you know i i went big uh i actually was craving pizza the other day and i really wanted some bufalina one of our favorite pizza spots

that we've talked about on the podcast before. They're closed for the duration of this. I thought they were doing it. They were, but they're now not doing it. Why would they not remain open for taking it? Well, I'm concerned that it's on a bigger scale than... I'm worried that they're financially struggling.

That's a great spot. I hope not, but just them shutting down abruptly and putting on their instagram was kind of concerning to me uh i got swedish hill dave uh or no i didn't yeah i got swedish hill i think on friday but i did uh i did june's one of i've talked about them numerous times i i post from there all the time uh had some great takeout food from there there were some people on the sidewalk while we were picking it up who were not social distancing and uh it was very concerning but uh you know i stayed in the car the entire time did not get near them so i

think i'm safe um outside of that dylan and i have are officially just playing car racing games on ps4 all the time yeah we're just have one guys uh we can we play online dylan is there is there a way to do that you're asking the wrong guy i just want to turn it on and off that's it ellen dylan's been asking me he's asked me numerous times how to increase the difficulty in the f1 game because he's he's having too easy of a time on it i figured it out you did so what'd you what'd you knock it up to 40 oh wow yeah i'm still i'm still cooking though man i'm still still up there at the top of the pack. I think you have better technology than me.

I'm Team McLaren, so my technology is kind of lacking, whereas you're a Ferrari guy, so you've just got the fastest cars. It must be nice. It's nice. But outside of that, I did something I've never done before yesterday. I did an hour-long Peloton ride. Wow. And I went hard.

Usually, my ride is about 30 minutes. But I went hard yesterday. I got 600 kilojoules. So I was just popping yesterday, just feeling real good. So many kilojoules. That's 100,000 joules. I'm a kilojoule. After I got done with my ride yesterday,

it notified me that Micah was in a warm down, cool down ride. And so I joined it and just immediately started like just chopping in order to beat micah you can high five people within the chat so i high-fived him and then i just started chopping just to catch up to him and beat him does micah put up numbers on that thing he's got the legs for it we know that he doesn't yet but i don't i think it's not because he's not capable i think it's because he's not pushing himself hard enough. He's still just doing classes and stuff, and I just have the theory that in order to actually maximize it,

you have to disregard what the instructor is telling you, and you just have to chop alone. He doesn't deserve those legs, man. He doesn't know how to use them. He deserves them. Hey, who's the most impressive Peloton celebrity right now? Like athlete that's remained in the profession? Yeah, Booger's putting up numbers, dude.

I will say for being relatively scrawny dudes, there are some golfers out there who are pretty impressive. Like I was on Sned's the other day. He puts up sneaky numbers for looking like how he looks. He's a professional athlete. I know, but you're still just a golfer. He's a golfer, though. Bubba Watson is putting up zero numbers.

He is lame. Well, he has spaghetti on him. Yeah, and Justin Thomas is doing the exact same thing. Their numbers are kind of embarrassing considering they are professional athletes. Wasn't Rory putting up numbers, right? Yeah, Rory does really good numbers on Peloton. Dude, Rory almost looks unhealthy how thin he is right now.

Yeah, his profile pic on Peloton, it's concerning. He looks weird. And he still carries 328. How does that happen? I re-watched the Dell match play over the weekend. I thought that. That was supposed to be on or supposed to be going down this week, I guess, or last week. And golf might be the most re-watchable sport.

Well, there's so much stuff that you forget happens mid-coverage. Like there's so many shots that you forget that happened early in the rounds. Yeah. you forget that happened early in the rounds yeah and uh like speaking of rory with carrying it like i mean uh what's the what's the drivable par four uh on the water is it 16 no 12 12 yeah we were close roy roy just went pulled big dog and just carried it by a yard. It's just fun. Golf's fun. I like golf. Have you been re-watching a lot of old sports stuff? Yeah.

ESPN News was showing classic fights. I watched Ali Spinks, 1974. Ali won the title for the third time. Can I make a simple request to the squad? Yes. If there is something like a replay like that, that's very rewatchable and kind of cool. Something I probably haven't seen before.

Can we make sure that this isn't the group text? Yeah. It took way too long for me to realize that Nadal Federer from Wimbledon a few years back was on a replay on ESPN two the other night. And I was pissed that I didn't just record it so I could watch it another time. You saw Duda's tweet, didn't you?

I saw it. Yeah. I saw it the next morning. I was like, well, this is not helping my case right now. I would have loved to sit down and watch that. I'm running out of TV shows. I never thought I'd say this. I'm running out of TV shows right now.

I was on ESPN over the weekend. I don't know if y'all saw that or not. Why? They played the rookie. Shut up. Dude, why would you wear a polo hat to the baseball diamond, bro? They chose it. I didn't get to pick what I wore.

Were you trying to put off fratty vibes? No. People on Twitter are so dumb. Who plays baseball in a polo hat? I don't know. I don't either, dumbass. The freaking producers picked it. It looks like you do. Well, I don't. I never have once ever in my life because that would be a It looks like you do. Well, I don't.

I never have once ever in my life because that would be a really stupid thing to do. The only film that we have of you playing baseball is you wearing a polo hat. Literally. I wasn't even playing baseball. Is there any footage of you going yard? I was walking by Dennis Quaid. There's a highlight tape out there somewhere.

I got to find a way to dig it up. Maybe you were wearing your team cap on the field and then like you wanted to put off a vibe so you switched to the polo well the reason behind the polo hat they told us to bring a bunch of options that was a hat that i had that i just like wore um they didn't want any logos but the post since the polo was so small in the hat and they thought i'd be just an extra way in the background, they didn't think it would matter. And they ended up bringing me up to the forefront where Quaid was. So that's how you can see it. Dude, I would have loaned you my red New York Yankees Fred Durst cap.

No, man, I'm good. If you could be an extra in any movie, what movie would be an extra in? Not Fool's Gold. Dude, shut up. What's your beef with Fool's Gold? It's just a Sunday background noise movie. It's an all-time movie. It's an all-time movie.

Is that like a take that you've had for years that I just missed in the PGP day? Yeah, it's kind of a take that one of my really good friends, he thinks it's like the perfect movie. And he said he's watched it over 250 times. And I actually believe him because I've seen him watch it numerous times is that uh uh it's my buddy drew he just loves him some fool's gold yeah who is it that's true yeah we watched uh watched how to lose a guy in 10 days right into fool's gold wow which is basically a sequel to how to lose a guy in 10 days damn have a weekend like i was going hard on the mcconaughey and kate hudson movies

that's understandable if there's ever a time it's now um dave i wanted to say this earlier when you were talking about golf uh there's an addition to the day of rough swing academy on the way and some might say it's custom this better be good is it the stand-up putter that you can just address the ball and then walk like leave the putter and it stands up and you just walk behind and check your line? The STK. Have you noticed the Instagram ad for that putter mat that's got all the yard lines on it, it looks like? I saw

Bo Hosler using it on his gram yesterday. I've seen some semi to some small to mid-sized golf influencers have that now in their homes. Why don't you make it happen? I'm going to have to reach out. Don't just stare at it, eat it.

Dave, that putter you were just talking about, the one that stands up, what the fuck is that thing? That can't be legal, right? Why is it a thing? Is it legal? The worst thing ever. Well, maybe you should try it out before you start talking down on it.

Can you imagine Adam Scott? He's on 18 at a gunpoint. He's lining up his putt. He steps away, and his putter's just sitting there in the middle of the green. That's so lame. That would be awful. Even if it was just a group of your boys, I would just flame one of my friends off the course if that happened.

What are you doing? Yeah. Well, it shaves three strokes, dude. it's not worth it you would have made a cut on 18 at wolf dancer i just thought of a i just thought of a movie that i would really like to be in as an extra you guys ready for this yeah yeah showgirls mighty ducks yeah showgirls would be good you're just in the club just in the back Mighty Ducks 2 USA Team USA versus Trinidad and Tobago

and I'm in the crowd jumping up and down next to the steel drum band I think that would be the perfect that would be the perfect cameo for me that's terrible best childhood movie tie-dyed jersey

steel drums better than the rookie being in Miracle would be the best extra it'd be pretty cool to be in miracle just to be there and see what it would feel like to like be at the game itself yeah absolutely alert what sorry rosie just rosie's off your shoulder and it just creeped me out for a second yeah she i i'll be honest uh while we're while we're recording from home i do have concerns about her she will randomly just like be sleeping and then she'll pop up and be ready to go out at like you know drop of a dime so we'll see well i'm

gonna have to record so i'm gonna have to record mail-in later and our episode tomorrow with parks here so i gotta find a way to keep him distracted. I can't just have him play knee hockey for an hour and a half over here. Just taking cuts? He takes after his dad. It's not going to work. It's weird how little credit I'm getting for this gift. You're good.

I'm sorry, Will. Dylan, did you see the Joey Gallo of the Rangers? Has like an in-house or in-apartment batting cage? Uh-uh. Oh, yeah. It's sick, but it looks so unstable. Like he has like a big loft-style apartment.

Where does he live? Do you live in the Dallas area? I think he's in Uptown, yeah. Okay. But he's pretty good at taking people's guts off the tee. That's tight. There's some ridiculous stuff in celebrity houses that I never knew existed. Yeah.

I mean, the thing with Joey Gallo's setup, too, is that if he misses the apparatus he has set up, the ball's going through these glass windows. His floor-to-ceiling glass windows. Yeah. He needs to be accurate. How many reps do you think it took Hashtag Chad to sink that shot last time?

Holy shit. It looked impossible. It was so sick, though. He kind of hit it two different times, too. The first one rimmed out. Then he nailed one. Pretty a lot a lot of strokes dave could dave could do it theoretically in his house dude chad lives in a mansion though i don't you have vaulted ceilings they're vaulted but like i mean chad's just got a swag of your home so i i don't know i don't want. I don't have full floppage.

I have not picked up a club in two weeks. We got to get that Dude Perfect money. I haven't picked up a club in months. Yeah, same. Are driving ranges safe? I was at

Topgolf this weekend. It was empty. I was... I've got some insider weekend. It was empty. So I was, I, uh, what? I've got some insider info. A lot of the private courses are able to stay open because they have restaurants and they're leaving the restaurants open. And I think there's a catch where you have to get food and then you can

play, but they don't have any flag sticks. They have the cup raised like an inch and a half out. Basically, if you hit the cup on a putt, it counts. From what I understand from an insider, Spanish Oaks is in great shape. Oh, really? Okay.

Are carts, is it full spectrum round of of golf can you get a cart and all that it is full spectrum that's tight yeah i would not want to watch guac spanish oaks that is a beautiful course but very hilly and very long part of the i was talking to sally about this this weekend part of the reason that this quarantine stinks so much right now is because we're in peak weather in austin right now every time i walked outside this weekend i was like man it's literally the perfect day out it was an all-time weather weekend here it was it's just brutal and like friday and saturday morning yeah well this is the time too when like i want to like i actually want to be outside drinking in austin and before know it, it's going to be too hot for that, and I'm going to have to wait until October again.

I'm pretty much not leaving my apartment until October at this point. The lockdown is going to be lifted, and it's going to be 99 outside and humid. Yeah, that's kind of a bummer. I'm worried about the power grid. If we're all locked inside just cranking the AC, I'm worried about rolling blackouts and whatnot. Oh, man. Yeah. Not great.

Not great? Whose dog's barking? I think it's my neighbor. Oh. Okay, I was going to say, who got a dog? How is that even possible? Apparently sound just comes through here brett was saying he heard birds earlier from outside my window there's a big oh yeah there's no point in showing it because the people at home can't see but my deck's just to my left over here

show us the deck you want to see the deck yeah yeah let's see the deck dog oh wow oh look at those windows so nice oh dude it's a great deck i can see how deep the deck? Yeah, let's see the deck, dog. Oh, look at those windows. These are nice. Oh, dude, it's a great deck. I can see how deep the deck is, but how long is the deck? It's a long-ass deck, all right? Y'all come see it here in a few months, I'm sure. And there goes the Rosie.

Look, this is probably a working-from-home deal, man. Can I ask you all a question? Yeah. What's the most depressing meal you've prepared for yourself or not really prepared for yourself so far? Oh, they're actually really good, but I've been doing nachos with leftover steak and chicken. And it's just the class.

I'm using Siete, the almond chip, or what are they, the almond flour chips? Liv Langdon has them. Yeah, those are not for me. I'm doing that, just sprinkling cheese, just throwing. The dispersion on my sour cream isn't great, but put some refried beans on there. It's very hard to spread, then just toss them in the oven.

isn't great but put some refried beans on there it's very hard to spread then just toss them in the oven well i'm doing peanut butter sandwiches just straight up peanut butter and jelly or just straight up peanut butter peanut butter just peanut butter dude i've probably had 10 000 peanut butter sandwiches in my life i love them they're so good just so good i wish i would have gotten some uncrustables for quarantine it wasn't even something i thought about like but now i'm like shit like yeah speaking of spanish jokes i have them in the i know those little food huts those are dangerous i'm trying to come out of this quarantine looking hotter than i entered it but like having a bunch of uncrustables around around is a dangerous game to play.

I haven't really had any depressing meals. Don't make that face, Will. This is our new segment. Yeah, okay. I've done a pretty good job of loading up on groceries. I made some chicken last night with some spinach. It was good. How'd you cook it?

I baked it. I did that French's... I did the french's okay hold on if you did the fried onion thing you're good that's the only way to do that you're good man get this guy an air fryer but uh we air fried a chicken last night david you likey uh oh this was the best air fried thing we've done yet whole chicken tastes like fried chicken. Just stuff that thing with butter. It was good.

Yesterday, I had honey nut Cheerios with sliced bananas out of my deck here. And I might post it, but I took a portrait mode shot of it. Because I was just so bored. I was just so bored. Oh, indeed. It makes me happy that you said that you've been eating honey Nut Cheerios because I've been eating so many Cheerios. It's like my meal between meals, but also sometimes fills in as a meal when I'm feeling lazy. My cereal on vacation only rule has been suspended for quarantine.

Oh, yeah. What is it? Oh, yeah. I really like that rule. That's kind of what I do with omelets. The homie and i go heavy we heavy with uh honey night cheerios man can i ask a question so sally and i both been eating cheerios and i've realized that i make much larger bowls of cereal than she does what's your how much

cereal do you put in and what's your gauge on how much milk you put in i fill it all the way to the brim basically until the cereal is submerged i do i do cereal at brim level of the of the bowl then i just i milk it from there that's cocky yeah yeah i go about two-thirds of the bowl and then i fill it with milk to the point where uh it's like the point just after the cereal starts to rise that makes sense yeah when the cereal starts to rise. Does that make sense? Yeah. When the cereal starts to rise, that's when you cut the milk. That's enough milk.

Yeah, that's when you cut the milk, the second it starts to go up. But it gets right up to the brim pretty much. But I don't fill it to the brim with cereal. That seems reckless. Dave, you go aquatic Cheerios though? You go everything submerged? Yeah. I mean, until until like if everything, I need to know that I'm not going to get a bite of dry cereal.

I make sure I can guarantee that at a minimum. See, that's when I just start mixing. I just dunk it. I dunk my cereal before I take a bite. You just push it down into the milk. I've been air frying my bowl of cereal. Shout out Instant Pot.

I didn't know you could do that. Can you send me your recipe? Dude, you know what is, I've been told, awesome, and this sounds great. Air fry your peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Just crisp it up like a grilled cheese, only instead of cheese it's PB&J.

We know in Texas, at the State Fair in Texas, Dave, they have deep-fried PB&Js. Shout out Big Tex. RIP Big Tex. I hope he doesn't get COVID. Hello, Dylan. Didn't the guy behind the voice die, right?

That what happened? Just retire him? I think he's legit. He's a dead man. I don't mean to laugh. It's definitely not a fake. You meant the character Big Tex, not the actual human. Yeah, I wasn't talking about the actual guy.

Well, he's not actually alive. It's just a big fake person, so he can't die. I thought he burned down. They rebuilt him, Doug. You got a fresh new fit. Got it. Are you doing the tryouts for the next voice with Big Tech?

I would love to, yeah. I already have it down perfectly. I'll shut it up. Thank you. You know what happened with Big Tech, right? No. He got his stimulus check, and then he used it for stem cell therapy. And that's how he came back.

Really? Is that what the stimulus check is for? Correct. Okay. I didn't know that. Yeah. It's available in certain states. Do we want to talk about what we would use our stimulus check on?

Yeah. Let's stimulate the conversation. Let's stimulate. Right. What are you doing? Do you see this on burn? I got this weekend. What were you doing? No one can see this on the pod.

Were you in Cabo? This is, Ooh, that one's good. What is it from? Do you have a tank top tan? Did you go to Roundup this weekend? No, I did the thing where you pull your shirt up like this.

Yeah, I just really wanted to move for you. Brett, you have such fair skin that you're not allowed to just roll up your shirt like that because you're always going to get a burn. You're always going to get a tan line. I mean, is this from your balcony or're always going to get a tan line. I mean, is this from your balcony or did you go to the pool? Yeah. Has your

apartment shut down your pool? Dude, and it's so sad too because people, they don't know that and they walk down to the pool and get to the entrance to either grill or go to the pool and then they're just locked out. And I've seen some very bad reactions to that.

I don't know why people don't know it's closed. We get an email. And the gym's closed too, so I've been getting in just crazy work-from-home workouts. Brett's one of the people when you see on Twitter that there's people on the beach in Panama City because the governor hasn't shut them down like brett's been secretly on spring break i was actually in galveston dude no one's doing sunburns right now except for brett yeah that's one of my

big concerns is coming out of this super fucking pale yeah i've been on the top on the runs it doesn't take much to burn me like i have to stand outside of the microwave when it's cooking because I don't want to get taken out. Okay. Yeah, that's good. It's just how you do it. Dylan, what are you going to spend your STEM check on? I really don't know, man. I haven't really put much thought into it i i spent way too much money on furniture already getting this place all set

up so i'll probably just hold on to it for a little bit i don't know i'll be honest that's one of the worst answers i could have imagined i don't know man i'm telling you i spent way too much money recently on we get a golf cart dylan get it. You want to buy a golf cart, Dylan? Oh, yeah. I do want to get a golf cart. This is the easiest answer of all time for you. You can't get a golf cart for $1,200, though. No, but you can at least put a down payment down. You need to find some dude who's lost his ass in the market who's selling his.

Yeah. I might look in the Austin Classifieds or whatever, but there's a dude in my neighborhood who has one, and he had his whole family in it, and he was just cruising down the street, and I got so jealous. They have like this little side garage thing that's perfect for it too. Wow. Yeah. It's lit.

You tow that thing to the golf course and use it at like Spanish Oats too? I think if I was going to get one, I would want the one that doesn't have a spot for the golf clubs, just has like an extra seat on the back, you know? I think that makes sense. I think that makes sense given your get one, I would want the one that doesn't have a spot for the golf clubs. It just has an extra seat on the back. I think that makes sense given your situation. It'd be really annoying to want to tote a couple people and then you're just like – Yeah. If I lived half a mile from an actual golf course, it would make sense to get the golf club type.

Yeah. But I might just get a people know a people hauler what color do you want what's the closest course to you barton creek fazio is uh i mean uh yeah fazio canyon is not far at all actually i mean as a crow flies it's like a mile and a half maybe but to get there you got to drive around so it's um so there's canyon there's another one that's kind of close what color do you want i mean i might i might just go og and keep it keep it white i don't know i'm not supposed to get like a fire ass red one or something put flames on it i don't know don't put flames on it okay i don't think that's the move okay i won't do that you do get

one we're probably going to order decals and like trick it out one night when you have like a house like your housewarming party or whatever oh we don't have truck nuts you'll wake up with truck nuts on your car i promise you that's why they call me no no what do you do stimulus check will i don't really know i like i really would I would like to replace the television in my apartment, but that seems kind of lame. I feel like TVs are just diving in price anyway, so I should probably use it on something else. I don't really know right now. I'd probably just buy a new TV. I know that's a really lame thing to do, but I don't have anything cool that I want right now.

That's cool. A new TV buy a new TV. I know that's a really lame thing to do, but I don't have anything cool that I want right now. That's cool. A new TV is a cool thing. Maybe a trip wouldn't be... I mean, knocking out some plane tickets that are necessary evils would be nice too. It's always nice to get a free flight, so using money that you didn't know you had to pay for that flight...

It's like when you have a flight credit or something. It's just the best thing in the world. It feels like you get a free vacation even though you paid for it six months ago and had to cancel something else that's tight maybe it just goes into will's bachelor party fund and everyone just gets a party dude is your bachelor party gonna happen hard to say hard to say i'll be honest i have not planned one single thing of it i've been on the outside of any conversation that's going on with it um and so i have no clue but it feels like uh june is like you know i feel

like we're going to be at the tipping point then like people are either going to be able to go out and like you know resume their normal lives or we're all still going to be just completely uh quarantined and hating our lives so we'll see i'm thinking about doing a zoom bachelor party if anybody's interested hashtag chad actually pitched that to me. I'm out. Yeah. That stinks. Is it because you don't know how to use like a, the zoom technology or you just not want to like party both. Okay. That's cool.

Yeah, I get it, man. Thank you. Thank you for our, uh, I'll probably use it. Uh,

probably donate to local business charities. $3 worth of pine house pizza. i mean i just a pizza party could be dope oh wash media pizza party first annual have we not had one yet we definitely have not well not with like that or we've had we've had our own pizza parties we we had like many pizza parties when Brett first moved here. Remember? It was like every other week we were – or every week we were eating it. It was every week. And then we started doing lunch there too.

It got excessive. It got bad. It's fine by me. Yeah. I'd kill for one of the pizza rolls right now with their salad. Oh, they go so hard. I'm probably going to buy a piece of exercise equipment in the next few days. So I'm probably going to have to earmark that stimulus check to pay off what I'm about to do.

Are you going to just buy $1,200 worth of pull-up bars? Dude, pull-up bars on your in-home pull-up bar are harder than at the gym and i don't know why i don't know they're just different because you just don't have like all the like overflow testosterone from the rest of the gym like pouring it in dude that's absolutely real i think i guess i don't know resistance bands where i ordered them anyway it's hard to get a pump in, man. Are you worried about coming out of this just looking really thin? Dude, I've lost like six or seven pounds.

Dude, the only thing you can do is get cut. You got to get cut. You got to get shed, shredded. Not great. I'm worried about Dylan just coming out of here looking like a shell of himself. Look like Bubba Watson when I come out of this.

Are you going to test drive the mustache for the quarantine? Maybe. That's by far the best time to do it. You can't break out the stache when you're the new guy on the block and you haven't even been accepted by the cool block parents yet. You can't show up there with the stache. Oh, yeah. Dylan just looking jacked with a mustache, tan body, just mowing his lawn in the front.

That's cocky. Dylan with a mustache looks 48. There's no doubt. Dude, I can grow a good stash. Yeah, I know. You should do that. I might. We'll see what happens.

Have you made any meals for your neighbors yet? Do you do the thing where you knock on people's doors? I guess it's kind of a tough time to do so. Are they supposed to make shit for me? I'm the new guy. Have you not had any mommies come over? Has anyone offered you an Arnie Palmy or anything? No, nothing like that.

The older woman across the street, she has some kind of collie. She's super nice, but she hasn't made shit for me yet. Damn, calling out grandma. Thanks for nothing, bitch. Hey, what's your next store like? Is it popping or not? I haven't gotten on it yet, actually.

I don't know. Yeah, I haven't checked that out. What are you doing? I don't know. I forgot that that was part of being in a community like this. Yeah, I got to do that. What college flight are you flying outside your front door? I don't do that.

No? No hook-up signs out there? Maybe do a terrible hook-up, dude. I got a bad thumb. You know that. Oh, yeah. That's right. That was that thumb.

Oh, yeah. Can you really not bend your thumb? No, I'm mobile. that's right. That was that thumb. Oh, yeah. Can you really not bend your thumb? No, I'm mobile. It's fine. The nail is just hanging on, though. I don't know what's going on with this nail. Did you suffer on Call of Duty at all once you started? I did.

Yeah, first couple games back were rough, but now I'm out there just fucking murking dudes. How's Twitch coming? Didn't we just talk about? No, it's not coming along well well we're gonna we're gonna throw some more money no we're gonna know about dave's twitch experience is people on people on reddit being like dude what's the deal why is this about that i'm about to go get the geek squad to show up here and install my twitch i feel bad like i yeah it's like i can't really help you and i don't think i would even i think i'd make matters worse at this point i can't even

tell dylan how to turn turn up the difficulty in an f1 video game i'm not gonna be able to technology has passed us by i feel like it passed me by the day i got married i feel like it was like oh you have a ring on your finger now you officially don't know how to work technology it's a miracle i know how i can get this stream up and running in my place. Without Brett, we would just be recording our own solo podcast and piecing them together and releasing. Probably. What was the thing you wanted to do? Will wanted to learn.

Well, I didn't know how easy it was going to be. I didn't know if we were going to have really good quality podcasts by being able to record remotely. And so I came up with this idea that I put into action. It's still available if anybody wants to do it. Actually, go match that subscribe button right now. It's called Hunkering Down. It's just another

feed where we're going to do micro dose podcasts throughout the day of just us being bored as fuck. It turns out that business can go on as usual so we don't have to worry about it but uh hunkering down is live on spotify it's tbd whether or not it's live on uh i forgot about that yeah i mean it has it had legs and i i did this way in advance like i definitely had the foresight uh the content it's not a bad idea you're an innovator no let's see

i don't even know if it's approved on iTunes yet, so let's find out. We even recorded a test episode. I was talking about that we wanted to buy three other road casters. Yeah. We should all have a full setup in our apartment if we need to record a podcast at any given moment. I would like to own a road caster. Convince me I'm wrong. I would like to own a road caster at some point.

For those who don't know, that's the board that we produce on. You mean this board? That's the board I'm referring to, yeah. There you go. Do you guys miss the sound effect? What do you guys miss most about the lodge? The guy next door, man. I bet you he's still in there making calls.

I can confirm that Hunkering Down is live on apple podcast as well wow do we have a logo and everything for that what's it look like uh hard to say it's just it's just all just you know kind of hanging out right now there is i i logged into it the other day to see if anybody had like accidentally discovered it and sure enough there's one total listen in the history of the podcast and it had to have been me once i checked to see if it was live sounds great oh how what's the hunkering down category like uh i don't know it should be leisure i'm like as a noted leisure podcaster i think i'm gonna rechange to change the name on our YouTube happy hour to just live from Wilmonds. Happy hour. Wilmonds, they're having a tough go at it right now.

Really? I've had to talk to our employees. Yeah, they're a little worried about everything. Are you all still doing takeout? No, we can't. What happened yesterday with the hammocks? Dude, one of our dishwashers he's been on this like big kick about going to yosemite for like an extended period of time and i was like all right

dude if there's ever a time you can do it it's now and so we told him he could go told him it was fine he wanted to free solo everything i was like no dude if you need climbing equipment and so he took all the carabiners off all the hammocks in the courtyard and it's like dude what like how are we supposed to like get grams off with a bunch of hammocks sitting on the ground? No one cares about that. That's so selfish. I know.

I know. You got to fire that guy. You know, there's stimulus money available for struggling businesses. Well, I know, but I don't know. Like you don't believe in handouts.

Well, we were trying to get like a, an infinity pool put in, or maybe like a, a waterfall. Like we want, we just want to add more water features to Wilmonds overall and i didn't really want to spend twelve hundred dollars on just carabiners so i don't know i've taken a pay cut at wilmonds um i'm no longer making six figures

at the restaurant so i'm you were making six figures yeah that was very you're not going to get a stimulus check oh we got a we got a bunch of uh we got a bunch of funding um like when we first started wilmonds i went on shark tank they didn't air it because uh one of the guys that i was presenting with uh sparked up a blunt on national television so they couldn't air it but mark cuban ended up investing several million dollars into it so i just made my salary really, really high. He didn't see the vision. Dude,

that sounds like fraud. It's not fraud. Like I got the money. I can, I can do whatever I want with it. Right? Like there's stipulations on that, on those investments.

So when Mark Cuban invested $3 million, it wasn't responsible for me to give myself a $2.9 million salary every year. Probably not. I feel like you got to spread that out. Are y'all doing to-go alcoholic drinks though? Oh, yeah. Yeah, but it's weird. Like this isn't even cost effective either though because we don't really –

we don't have like the resources to buy a bunch of to-go containers. So we've just been giving full blenders full of the drinks to people so they can just bring it home and blend it themselves. Can I stop by later for a painkiller? Yeah. Do you want the drink or do you want the ones that we sell out of the back? I want it

in a blender if you're giving it away. Okay, so not in a pill bottle? No. First drink post-quarantine that you will have out in public. It's going to be a frozen Mark for sure. Matt's margarita. Yeah.

Yeah. I don't want to do that, but it will definitely be a Matt's margarita or a knockout martini. It's going to be a Coors banquet at Bolden Acres. Wow, dude. I might go Tiki. I don't hate it.

I might go painkiller. Do a bitch. Oh, that's going gonna knock me on my ass too yeah oh we're getting we're getting annihilated when this thing's over hey dylan do you remember when uh on this weekend and fun you would always be like oh i'm i'm getting annihilated tonight we would go out and you'd have like six beers you'd go home how many beers beers. Six beers is a lot. You'd go home and you'd have a beer. How many beers that actually was. That's a lot of beers.

I don't think you guys understand. I'm getting annihilated tonight. Yeah. Those are good times, man. Can't do that anymore. Well, out anyway. What's the most boozed up you've been since you've been quarant quarantined probably the live stream yeah actually it was that night because uh my my sister and brother-in-law were here and uh i had two beers during the stream and then i switched to wine and i put i put away some wine

and i got a little faded i accidentally put away like almost an entire bottle of wine last night i bought some really really bad wine while I was preparing for the long haul, but I needed to hit the number of bottles that I needed to get in order to get the discount at the store. Oh, yeah. You know House Wine, the brand House Wine? No. It's an inexpensive brand of wine, and they have another one called Steakhouse. I was like, well, that sounds tight.

I bought it, and it turned out it's one of the worst bottles of wine I've ever had. It's just not for me. I was just trying to plow through it last night and I drank three quarters of a bottle of wine and felt pretty turned up. I think that's the drunkest I've been since. Fucking A. Not much to be proud of. I did have two beers

so I was double faded on the live stream that one night. We've been doing Ranch ranch water pluses here what's that or the l dave plus it's this is the l dave with a splash of quantro so margarita no it's an l dave plus will okay sorry that was insulting to l dave's i didn't mean to do that you're lucky i'm quarantined No, it's an L Dave plus will. Okay. Sorry. That was insulting. Del Dave's. I didn't mean to do that.

You're lucky. I'm quarantined. What are you going to throw hands? I'm going to ride my, I'm going to ride Randy's bike over there and just slap you silly. Let's talk about hymns real quick. Are you guys ready for this? Hymns. You know, 66 percent of men

start to lose their hair by age 35 and once you've noticed thinning hair it can be too late sometimes your hair is slowly moving backwards you got some bald spots coming up last night joe buck was just ripping justin thomas for his hair it was just it was very very ruthless on twitter i don't like that line of humor no it's not funny like this is no joke i don't think people understand that the best way to prevent hair loss is do something about it while you still have some i mean brett you you know all about this you're not losing your hair but you're doing it as a preventative measure which is just as important as doing it when you're losing your hair yeah i don't think anybody else out there is doing what i'm doing and if you're not you should

so i'm not trying to convert you to a preventative measure here by getting on HIMSS before you need it. If true, that's big. There's no more awkward in-person doctor visits or long pharmacy lines. 4 HIMSS connects you with real doctors online, which could save you hours. It's confidential and discreet. All you have to do is answer a few questions. A doctor will review, and if they determine it's right for you, they'll prescribe you a medication to treat hair loss that is shipped directly to your door.

Sounds great. Right now, our listeners can get started with their first month free. Go to 4hims.com slash steam. That's 4hims.com slash steam. Prescriptions require an online consultation with a physician who will determine if a prescription is appropriate. The offer is valid only if prescribed. It's a three-month minimum subscription.

Additional restrictions do apply. See website for full details and important safety information. But remember, that's 4hims.com slash steam. Dude, everything's an online consultation now. They were early. They got ahead of the game. Yeah, they're pioneers. I got a question.

Brent, where are you recording from? I see a wood fence behind you. Yeah, this is my new apartment. Are you in Houston right now? Yeah, Brent's in H-Town. He's teening from H-Town, isn't he? Oh, okay. God, you rascal.

Really flattening the curve there, huh? why he's this is why brett's wearing a hat i told you that there was something up with brett's hat well i would have done it anyway i've been i've worn a hat on all morning podcasts we've done so when i told you before we got on that your your audio and your connection seemed better and you're like yeah i'm in a different spot better wi-fi you didn't meet i didn't know you meant like a different area code he tried to keep it from us that's that's what's going on yeah you guys well all right here's the deal i'm in houston and we're quarantining it's it's a very quarantined thing it's not like we're going out it's a very quarantined thing we're being the precautions are high but so you were sure they are is she is she in the room with you right now no okay dude were you in galveston yes

or no no they did close the beaches though by the way she told me that all the beaches in galveston have uh it's like the water is like dirt. It's like not dirty, but like brown. They're not good beaches. You didn't know that? I didn't know. And then she was saying all the lakes and rivers and stuff, all the water is brown. But they just swim in it and do it anyway. The lakes and rivers where?

In like Texas and Louisiana and stuff. I don't know about that. Yeah, that's not accurate. Slow down there. You see, all the... Brett, people down here have different standards for their water quality compared to us up north. That is not true. Lakes up north, you can see the bottom.

And they're like, what? Okay, so the Mississippi River, that's where it all flows west when it comes out of the mississippi river like all the dirt and silt and shit and that's why uh our beaches are in the waters like that it's dirty texas is not known for their beaches surely you knew this was a thing i knew they weren't known but like south Island, like is it still dark down there? Yeah.

Yeah, it's not great. You don't get into like decent beaches, in my opinion, until you get to the Florida Panhandle. What about Orange Beach in Alabama? Gulf Shores is – actually, Gulf Shores is not bad. Any place west of the Mississippi River, the mouth of Mississippi is dirty. East is nicer.

Dude, we got to be doing a hell of a reduction of pollution right now, right? Yeah. That's what people are saying. That the Earth contributed. It's slowing down

climate change. It's a current age. Fuck this. Yeah. Like when the movie gets made one day, that's going to be the, the protagonist. Hmm.

Hey Dave, can I ask you for some background on something? Yeah. I saw a tweet about this, but I didn't see the actual response from Phil Mickelson. What's the deal with tiger Phil part two? Oh, uh,

so someone tweeted Tiger and Phil essentially saying, hey, you and Tiger should go do a live stream and just video it. Y'all two and a cameraman go out the course and just play, mic yourselves up. And Phil responded. Phil said, working on it, something like that. And I don't think he would have responded because this wasn't like a big account that asked him. I don't think he would have responded had he not been serious. So it looks like we might get a tiger Phil part two.

Hopefully this one has a little bit more personality because the last one, I gladly paid for it, but, and I would pay money for this, but like it left a lot to be desired as far as the fun and easy banter. Yeah. They like, I think it was a tweet that he responded to the one that said that they need

to be in the same golf cart together. I don't know. I don't think so. I love that idea. The idea of having them in the same golf cart with like GoPro strapped to it and like full mics and everything like that, it would make it so much more interesting from a fan perspective than having them walking around with their caddies

and not actually talking or interacting with each other. How about this? No caddy. I don't want any caddy. Yeah. No. Get them out. Give me Tiger and pretty much anyone else other than Phil.

No, I disagree. Dude, Phil has more to say tiger's so reserved tiger's not good in those phil those two bring out good stuff in one another though who do you want dylan i mean give me uh give me kepka i'm tired i'm tired of i'm tired of him and I don't really care about what he has to say anymore. I'm not even a Kepka guy, but I think it would be good TV. I think I just end up getting really mad because I feel like Brooks would come in with a bunch of premeditated staged answers to things,

and he would be volume shooting trying to say things that make him sound tight. Give me Ricky and Tiger. I could see that being fun. Ricky. That'd be fun. Ricky's got a personality. Don't say the golf boys. Patrick Reed.

I'd probably run at that. No, not Patrick. Dude, I want JT over Ricky. I don't want any JT on my screen. If I'm paying money, it better not be for Justin Thomas. I don't want his giant polo horse on my TV screen. Oh, come on, man. I don't want those beady eyes looking at my living room.

I don't really have a better option. I want Tiger and Phil again. I'm good with them for a little bit. Give me Pat Perez, somebody with personality. Should we just get Charlie Hoffman and Pat Perez? Does Hoffman have personality? I don't know much about Hoffman. Of course he does.

You just assume he does because he looks like a wild card. Yeah. I haven't really – apparently a bunch of the F1 drivers are doing time trials against each other and stuff like that. I feel like that's something Dylan and I need to get into. We got to figure out how to race each other. I know. I'm worried you're better than me though.

Like from what it sounds like, it's absolutely smoking me. So I don't really know what to do with myself. Speaking of racing, uh, horse racing. Did you guys know it was just still going on? No jockeys,

right? No, they have to have jockeys no they don't someone tweeted me like tagged me in a tweet they're doing horse races without jockeys somewhere I swear really yeah it was actually a barstool tweet I think some guy

tagged me in you're talking about big cats big cat derby we've had a few people reach out to us tag me in. You're talking about Big Cat's Big Cat Derby? We've had a few people reach out to us. Is that real? I don't know. I didn't really look at the tweet that closely. Yeah, but I feel like horse racing should be doing more.

This is kind of a moment for that. It's the only sport. So no spectators. It's just horses and jockeys, and that's it. They're still running sport. No spectators. It's just horses and jockeys and that's it. They're still running them. They could not do the Kentucky Derby without the pageantry and the fans though. No one would care. They just shove the

horses in the starting gate and just let them go? Yeah. I don't understand how this works. You still got to have people there leading them, so why not just put a jockey on it to make it easier? How do they stop these things? They have a giant net that the horses run into, then you pick them out? You still got to have people there leading them, so why not just put a jockey on it to make it easier? That's what they do. How do they stop these things?

Do they have a giant net that the horses run into, then you pick them out? I don't understand how this would all work. No, they have jockeys, Will. That's what Brett's saying anyway. Yeah. But dog races, it's just dogs. They just turn them loose,

and they chase that little rabbit around. Yeah, they chase the little rabbit. Didn't you have a rabbit thing, Dylan? Wow. You talking about the vibrator? Yeah. No, see, I don't have any news for that. My brain did not go there.

I think there's... Dave, did you see the Combat Sports Minute news? What? I just found the tweet by the way they're not i'm sorry they're not horses they're camels still it's still close camel racing that's great um but But Tony Ferguson fight is done. Like it canceled?

Yeah. Because the reason why? Is it Corona? Khabib's in Russia and can't get out. Oh, they locked the borders. Yeah. Dude, Putin. I guess that makes sense.

You can't get a PJ out of an exception. Yeah, what's the deal with PJs right now? Can you fly PJs still? You got to think. In Russia, probably not. I don't know. I feel like that was the whole thing about the Tony Ferguson-Khabib fight was that it was never going to happen, right?

Because he always backs out. Khabib got really fucked up trying to make weight, like had liver failure. Tony Ferguson tripped over a cord and blew his knee out before the fight. Like this is like the fourth time it's been canceled. It sounds like a really lame 30 for 30. And now it's because Khabib can't leave Lush. But they said they offered the fight to Justin Gaethje.

Justin Gaethje? Yeah. He's a beast. He hits hard. It's not the same. It's a fight I'm paying for, but I'm not as excited for it. I don't know who any of the people are. Yeah, he said, yeah, Habib confirmed in an IG chat earlier today,

this is per Ariel Hawani, in Russia he can't leave because they have closed their borders. Did you see Texas close their borders to Louisiana? Yeah. That must have been a bummer for you, Brett. You're probably trying to go to Bourbon Street. Yeah, Brett's trying to party right now. You ever hear of the party after Mardi Gras?

It's just all the month of March. It's on Bourbon Street. What? I don't know what you're talking about. Never mind. Anyway, I have so much breaking news here i'm almost it's just bursting at the seams here do breath-breaking news dog we're ready for it man how's john prime doing uh so far just positive for coronavirus i don't know if he's dead oh man

he's got who is that i have major worries about him he's's old. He's an old school Americana singer-songwriter. He's also had very severe issues with his throat, but I don't really know how that affects him. Hey, speaking of old time Americana singer-songwriters, did you guys see Bob Dylan released his 17-minute epic about the assassination of JFK? Can you call something 17 minutes an epic? I think it's

one song, so yes. Oh, it's a song. I thought this was like a video of some sort. Why is he doing this right now? Is he bored? I don't know. Dude, now's the time we need him more than ever. I don't know.

I feel like I'm getting on some Bob Dylan for a bit. I'm not going to ever pay for a Bob Dylan concert at this point. Do you think this song slaps? I haven't heard it yet. The subject matter just kind of seems like a downer to me. Yeah, our president was assassinated. I don't think we're going to hear this in the club anytime soon for numerous reasons.

Do you remember when Ravel tweeted the uncensored assassination footage? It was digitally remastered to show more skull fragment. Yes. He didn't warn us about it. He just let it rip. Dude, it's important that he did that, though. Hey, Will, this one's for you.

LA's beloved taco trucks are in survival mode. Why is this for me? Because you're about to get a taco truck for Wilmonds at a steal of a price. That's actually a good call. If there's ever a time to start investing in that, I guess it's now. We could actually do a Wilmot's taco truck. We could do a pop-up. Okay.

We could do a pop-up taco truck. This sounds like a side venture. Okay. If you guys don't want to be financially burdened by this, I can do it myself. I've gotten myself into this mess. i need to claw myself out uh hey dylan uh ghetto boys star face revealed tested positive for coronavirus oh that's too bad man that's all i got on that one that's all i got on that one too they will i'm surprised you don't like the ghetto boys he's a king of the south

what brett do you know do you know any scarface songs doing because i know that you would know one i probably do but i i don't they don't come to mind off at the office space soundtrack oh yeah yeah that i used to go hard to that one, actually. Opening song, I think, where the dude with the glasses in his car. Yeah. Dude, Office Space is so good. Will Damon feel good to be a gangster?

Damon feel good to be a gangster. Yeah. Yeah. It will. Trump says the U.S. will not pay for security for Prince Harry and Meghan Markle says the u.s will not pay for security for prince harry and megan markle inside the border good why would we they gave up their royal like their all their royal stuff like in what world would we ever think that it was like prudent for us to pay for it like we don't need to pay for another country's like-royalty to get around.

It makes no sense that they would expect the US to cover that. Do they expect it? Is that the expectation? That's unclear. Is Trump just shooting from the hip for no reason? Just trying to divert the conversation away from coronavirus? Like, alright, I'm just going to tank the royal family right now. I feel like the government provides

all the celebrities with protection. Yeah, that's like this is as meaningful as Trump saying that he's not going to provide circling back with any royal family right now. I feel like the government provides all the celebrities with protection. Yeah. This is as meaningful as Trump saying that he's not going to provide circling back with any security detail in the United States. Why would he? Are they going to live in Canada anyway? Yeah, they were.

Then they were like, I'm all set. I'm actually going to do the U.S. They didn't like the taxes up there. They live in L.A. They are? Why am I the one that's behind on all this news? Good question. Why would they move to LA? Uh. They want to be in the scene, though.

Don't move to the scene. Is she going to start acting again? What's the play here? I hope not. Actually, I don't care. I have no opinion on it. She'll probably get like offered so much money for like a role in some blockbuster she's gonna get offered like a marvel role magic mike three i think harry should start acting i mean i i'm just i'm kind of out on them just because i can't imagine a scenario where i'd be like yeah i don't want to be royal anymore

all right did they did that i think it's cool yeah i'm just trying to put myself in this situation it's like you know if i can live in if i mean like when prince uh when prince what's his face why am i blanking right now william prince albert prince albert prince albert that was good um what's their dad's name charles charles with like charles is quarantined in like a scottish castle right now like did he test positive like me yeah he tested positive but he apparently his symptoms were pretty low but he's quarantined in a scottish castle right now meanwhile we got like harry and megan trying to get security detail in the united states like which which scenario sounds doper. Harry wants to go to the club and do drugs and shit.

Yeah. He's a wild boy. Yeah. And nobody's wilder than the wild boys. That's true. Him and Peter are going to start rolling around together. If Peter starts hanging out with Prince Harry, I'm going to be devastated.

Let's go. I mean, I had a shot this entire time. That's true. Hey, uh, Hey, is the mic picking up Randy heavy heavy breathing next to me i think so

he's like he's like he i let him out of the room and he just walked back in and sat down he's just he's really antsy man i mean it's it's we're getting to that time he can get let out if we need to it's all right is that is that the finale of Brett's breaking news? I still have more. Dave, this one's for you. A person, I don't know if you saw on Twitter, flew a drone over to this lovely lady who was dancing on her roof. And now they are quarantine dating. Video. I don't think this is for me. I don't.

This sounds fake. This sounds fake. This sounds staged. It sounds like a bad attempt to go viral, and it sounds like it works, so maybe it's a great attempt to go viral. I don't like it. No. The way the guy narrates the video that he cut together is the most insufferable thing of all time. Where can I find this video?

In the Washed Media group text. It's just terrible. Like I just, I don't believe that this is real at all. And it's got so many retweets and like people applauding it that it kind of makes me sick. Why would you,

like the reason I know that this guy is not being genuine about this is because he didn't just release it and cut this into a video. He did it on TikTok. Yeah. And I'm sorry. Like if you you're not if you're doing it on tiktok then you're obviously doing this for content purposes and not to actually like find somebody it is i don't want to be a jerk and like i'm sure it's happy and whatever i just watched like the first 15 seconds and this sucks yeah listen to him narrate it. It is fake, but if by some chance

it's real, I hope that their relationship fails. I didn't know you could buy bubbles like that and just get in them. They buy them on me? Yeah. I feel like that's dangerous. He buys one of those six-foot Zorbs.

Like a big hamster ball. Yeah. Zorb. Remember in Rocket Power when they would get in the Zorbs and go down? This whole video stinks. All of it. I'm out. Is this a meet cute?

I don't think that qualifies. Hey, last but not least drake has shared his first photo of his son adonis right i'm gonna ask you this once and only once have you ever had sexual intercourse with drake's baby mama because that baby looks way more like you than it does drake um yeah you know you're you're right i have not okay i have my concerns so he looks he's half black half jewish and she is like a dark feature almost looks latina and uh the baby has blonde curly hair and blue eyes and fair skin i don't get it. Very fair skin. I don't know. I can't explain that one genetically.

I don't think... Does the mom have blue eyes? It's hard to say. Don't a lot of kids have blue eyes when they're first born or whatever? Some do. And then they change change i don't know i don't i was like when i was born i had like jet black hair

and then like as a kid like a lot of kids do i was just like fully blonde for a while and now i'm obviously not so i've just been all over the map. My eyes have been the same color, I believe, though. Run the gamut. Well, guys, that's it for breaking news. There's a lot of electric stuff. Should we get out of here? Yeah, it's been fun, y'all. Hey, if you aren't aware,

we have a YouTube channel now. We might be going live from it. YouTube! Yeah, get on the YouTubes. Search Watch Media. Subscribe. But yeah, also, we'll be going live from it yeah get on the youtubes search watch media subscribe um but yeah also we'll be back tomorrow we're doing a patreon episode opto only tomorrow sorry guys sorry to all you people out there they're just five dollar backers this is opto only uh but yeah we got some we're still cooking things up to uh keep things fresh on the uh you'll quarantine front but you know this is our first first outside of the studio so bear with us during this trying time are we gonna have this week

what are we in a live happy hour again this week i can confirm that i will do at least one live happy hour this week oh yeah every time i tried to get will to happy hour with me last week he bailed i just want to put that out there no i didn't you asked me one night at like 11 o'clock you asked me if i wanted to go live and everyone i went to bed at 9 30 last no no no dekembe it would you had one at 11 yeah after you would respond to my previous text from like three hours later you're like sorry man i was doing something and then i was like let's just go now and you didn't respond oh that's one of those scenarios where my phone is set down and I don't look at it because I'm watching a movie

and then you try to like, then I respond back and immediately go to sleep. I'm not looking for a response back. I'm giving Will a taste of his own country boy Will finger wave. That was a sexy one that I did though. Yours isn't as sexy. Dude, mine's hotter. I have the hottest finger wave.

Yeah, but it's not sexy. There's a difference. That's fair. Yours is more cute than hot. Will's got a cute finger wave. Yeah. All right. Bye.

See you tomorrow. you