Circling Back - Dork Genes & Flauta Boy Summer

Episode Date: June 5, 2023

With so many flautas flying around this weekend, yeah, the boys are buzzing. Dave's all in on flautas, Will breaks down his golf trip, Dillon has a sneaky good app idea, alien spacecrafts and communication, Zuckerberg is denying getting choked out, and so much more. Enjoy a free two-week trial on Patreon for additional weekly episodes: www.patreon.com/circlingbackpodcast Watch all of our full episodes on our new YouTube channel: www.youtube.com/circlingback  Shop Washed Merch: www.washedmedia.shop  (0:00) Fun & Easy Banter (12:40) Recapping This Weekend in Fun (26:12) Dillon Has An App Idea (32:28) Alright We’ve Got Alien News (45:45) Alpha Zuck (58:00) Dave Has A Food Take Support This Episode’s Sponsors Nutrafol: www.nutrafol.com/men (CIRCLING for $15 off) ROW by Academy: Head to a store or at www.academy.com/row  Athletic Greens: www.athleticgreens.com/circling (FREE 1 year supply of immune-supporting Vitamin D and 5 FREE travel packs with your first purchase) --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/circling-back/message Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

all right we're back circling back podcast coming to you live from austin texas my name is will to my left david ruff welcome back will it's good to be here i don't know if you had a chance to listen to last week's shows but um a lot of people were saying that i was volume shooting and to those people i say fred on good sirs i was what i do if i'm sitting in this chair i'm not turning down a shot you put dave behind that board with the switches and the thingies, you don't know what the fuck's going to happen. Anything.

He's like a Vici back there. He is. Completely different show. Chopping and screwing. Yeah. No two shows are the same. He's on the ones and twos. Well, yeah. It'd be really weird if we just put out the same show numerous times.

I don't think that would perform well the second time around. People would probably stop listening. Yeah. Nobody would notice. Yeah. I don't know. People listen to songs all the time on like on repeat. That's true. Why not podcasts?

People spin Valerio again, over and over again. Podcasts are just songs without music backing them. No audio bed, Dylan. It's all art, man. It's podcast week. It is podcast week. It's podcast week. That's cool. That's cool. How are you guys celebrating podcast week?

I'm recording podcasts every day this week. That's what'm gonna do too i'm gonna keep keep with the regular schedule of recording podcasts this week but it is about podcasts yeah yeah i'm gonna steal your catalytic converter that's how i'm celebrating i'm gonna steal your girl okay is whiskey girl or his normal girl still in chivry ladies and and gentlemen. All of them. That'd be weird. You're going to have a harem of Dave's girls? You got two girlfriends. Yeah, but I want another one. Hey, Will, I am... That was very rude to open a beer.

He just completely cucked whatever you're about to say. You may as well just leave. I was about to say I missed you, but I fucking didn't. I think you did. I was also about to apologize for posting a gram at d shivery without you but now i'm not sorry that i did that thank you for ease non-consecutive was it was it difficult to see that good of a photo get posted and not be a part of it yes um it was a great pick it was tough it was tough it was a great pick yeah it's it's It was tough. It was a great pick. Yeah.

It's never great when the squad is just thriving and you're watching from afar. Whole squad looked handsome as fuck. We replaced you with Harbs. Dude, don't do that. Sorry, man. Dude, we can't... Harbs can't get released to the masses.

He's too alpha. Yeah, he can't. He's too alpha. We can't let him out. We got to gatekeep Harbs. Yeah. Yeah. You can't have your most alpha friend

start making friends with everybody else because then suddenly you're on the back burner. out we got to gatekeep harbs yeah yeah like you can't have your most alpha friend like like start making friends with everybody else because then suddenly you're on the back burner yeah i've i've had that happen to me before like i don't think he would steal my wife because he seems like an upstanding guy but like when you look at that dude you're like dude he could steal your wife for sure i've got a friend who's a friend stealer if like you introduce him to like a new circle like that like you bring around like he'll immediately just like take your spot that's sorry it's real sorry a friend stealer yeah it's he just he just takes it over he's like well there's enough for everybody to go around he's like i'm the i'm the star or the sun in this solar system now the the you guys revolve around

me you're out you being me is that kind of like when you bring um a friend around your girl for the first time and he's just like hella charismatic and funny and shit like what are you doing yeah what's your problem this isn't you yeah shut up he's just it's just like a riz because he knows there's no it doesn't matter if like his jokes don't land so he can just try anything okay and you know like it's the first time meeting so he's gonna get some laughs yeah that's true yeah courtesy laughter courtesy laughter hey as long as people are laughing i don't care why we've made a career on courtesy laughter it's true that's why that's why i have a seat at this on this podcast i think i laugh at you guys that was a cocky sip how is that

las vegas nights you're wearing a new shirt today. All night long, it says. All night long. Oh, kind of didn't realize you bought that shirt so you could sing unnecessarily on the podcast. I noticed in the bullpen earlier when we were talking about your Vegas Knights shirts, you didn't sing. No, but it says all night long spelled, of course, like the Knights. Boy, I hate their aesthetic, man. Boy, I hate you. I don't give a F.

It's trash. I don't give a F what you think about my team. They're a great team, and they're probably going to win. I feel like I'm in the minority of people who don't like the Kraken jerseys. I like the name more than I like their logo. I like their color scheme. I'm not into it, and I feel like it might be a bad take. I'll take that.

Yeah, you know, the Golden Knights, it's not the best aesthetic. I understand that. Why did you say, the Golden Knights, it's not the best aesthetic. I understand that. Why did you say it like that? Aesthetic? Who's favorite in that series? Sports Will coming up. The Golden Knights. They're also up 1-0.

Okay, I haven't been paying attention. Congratulations on your Stanley Cup. Is that? I'm not doing that. Come on, Dave. You can't do that. Grow up. You can't do that.

Oh, no. It's done. Dude, come on. That's messed up, dog. Dude, I believe in the reverse jinx so much come on that's messed up dog dude dude i believe in the reverse jinx so much that's just messed up dude panthers are a fun story but sorry dude i'm a big thurs guy every day's thursday in my household is that a panthers thing yeah people call the um the carolina panthers the thurs i think sometimes i've seen that on the grom i'll

tell you that stinks yeah i don't like it there's something weird about it I think, sometimes. I've seen that on the Grom. I'll tell you, that stinks. Yeah, I don't like it. There's something weird about it. Yeah. It's a soft word. It's not as bad as... Actually, it might be worse than the Ning. Thurs sounds like a nightclub. The Thurs.

Come down to Thurs. Yeah, dude, we were gonna go to Thurs, but, like, the fucking line was so long. And they were just letting chicks in, but, like... Connor says he knows the doorman, though, but it didn't work. It's Thurs, but it's got, like, the little in but like connor says he knows the doorman though but it didn't work it's thurs but it's got like the little um like the scandinavian yeah yeah i don't know what it is not an accent scandinavian the two dots dude we're going through we're going that's an umlaut right no one knows that's that's hansen's uh first single

i was actually watching uh i turned on m MTV the other day because there was nothing on TV and I was going through and it was like 90, and it just said like 90s music videos. That's phenomenal. And Oombop was on. And I can't imagine having three sons who started a band at that age

being that famous at that moment in their lives. The drummer was like six years old. Yeah. Fritz and Rhodes should start a band or a podcast who's the bad boy of hansen i think it was taylor the middle one yeah i don't know their names that's probably that's probably a good thing so so you're telling me that if umbop came up on you know do you know it you struggle getting there? You wouldn't even show us your answer? I would get that one right, but I don't know their names.

I think if you don't write down an answer at this point, you deserve to get docked points. I get stressed out. I get anxious leading up to those shows because I just know that I'm going to perform very poorly. The music part really stresses me out. Randy's got something to say. I feel like I did do umbop on one episode. I think you did. I's got something to say. I feel like I did do

umbop on one episode. I think you did. I think you did, yeah. I probably got it right. I think I did. I bet you didn't. So much I did. I bet you got the name

of the song. I bet you didn't get the name of the band. I probably put, actually, you know what? I think I put the Hanson Brothers. I think you did, too.

That's sounding more and more familiar. He's just a hockey guy. If you guys don't know what you're talking about, patreon.com slash circling back podcast, where we do a game show called, do you know it to end every month tomorrow?

We're doing exactly five minutes where we take listeners, submitted prompts and discuss them for exactly five minutes. Go sign up. Dude. If in fifth grade, sixth grade, if, if you got caught listening to Hanson or even like somebody walked in your

house and you had Hanson like on the TV, it tv it was done dude i actually thought they were kind of swag like they i they were rollerblading in their music video like they were in a band like i thought they were kind of tight but i was embarrassed that i thought that i wasn't willing to tell other people that like when i would go rollerblading around the neighborhood i was acting like i was a hansen brother are they still making hits no dude i mean i bet they i bet like i bet one i bet like they're doing well for themselves they're hanson who doesn't like hanson they get that mailbox money it's crazy i bet they signed a bad record deal yeah yeah they definitely got exploited at some point your first your first deal is never

a good one you just get smoked what's yours oh god damn it. Huh? Your deal. Oh, that's good. Hold on. I found Chris Hansen. Dead & Co. My favorite Dead & Co. song from this summer tour is when they play this song, Deal. And every time I see it, I think of you. Hell yeah, dude.

Like, Dorns is way lamer than this. That's what's up. What did you find out for us, Dave? Despite their short-lived time together, the group went on to amass a net worth of $60 million. What? As a group. That's 20 each. So the parent... Was this a situation where the parents were, like,

stealing their money? Well, I haven't heard that, but you could see how that might happen. Like, I was... I've been... Sometimes I'll toss on a Laguna Beach episode just to feel nostalgic. It's crazy to me that

parents signed off on their high school kids doing an entire show about them dating and drinking at people's houses and doing all that just seems bizarre to me that parents were like you know what we're gonna let our kids do this sign them up it's free range parent we're gonna let them go to cabo where steven's gonna be a piece of shit. Oh, yeah. You would not have liked Steven. Were you team LC or Kristen? I was always a big Kristen guy. I started LC, but as I

get older, as I get older, I still, I'm a fan of both of them. I want the best for both. KCAB is bad. I just love the whole Laguna Beach squad. Like that show, that show changed my life in ways that I don't think I realized. I don't think I'd get married there

if it's not for the television show. Was Laguna Beach the predecessor? To the Hills? Yeah. Correct. Yep, the Hills was more the college days and the internships. I think I was more into the Hills

than I was Laguna Beach. The Hills was a better show than Laguna Beach was at the time. Actually, my friends and I, we created a parody video one time called um the hills country play on hill country and we did it like to a similar like intro with it was kind of funny uh our boy mitchell is one who made the video i'd pay i'd pay money to see that it It's out there. It still exists? It's out there. Heck yeah. I'll try to find it.

If you haven't already, please go to youtube.com slash circling back and go follow us on there. But without further ado, I think it's time to recap this weekend in fun. Presented by Athletic Greens. Our next partner has a product that we use literally every day.

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Again, that's athleticgreens.com slash circling to take ownership over your health and pick up the ultimate daily nutritional insurance. Dylan, what did you get into this weekend? Thanks for asking, Will. Friday didn't do a darn thing. Just hung out with Parks, and we had a pretty mellow night. Saturday was the day, though. Sorry to say, Will, I know you weren't here for it. No, it's okay.

It's okay. Saturday was the day. Went to Brett's little birthday celebration out at Ski Shores on Lake Austin. Yeah, you said you wanted to go skiing to hit the slopes this weekend. Okay. I didn't go skiing. Brett has a crew, man. Brett rolls deep.

I was telling him, and I met his sister, by the way, who surprised him. She came in this weekend. He didn't know she was coming in. Excellent to meet her. She's great. Did Randy help with that surprise? Oh, there's no way. I was talking to her

and i was like i just i gotta realize that brett has more friends in austin than i do at this point yeah which is sad since i grew up here and he's been here for like 20 minutes it made me really sad like it made me happy for brett when he said this to me but it made me sad personally when he was like yeah dude like no one rsvp'd no besides you to this party and i was like dude i struggle to get anyone to hang out with me at this point i'm just old and lame if i texted everyone i knew and said hey i'm gonna do this thing out of ski shores please show up it's for my birthday i get maybe 18 people redhead well over like 25 i think it was great anyway had an excellent time it was one in one out the vibes were on point dave even came through austin's aust Austin's hitting right now in terms of just like weather and vibe.

Randy came through dripping. Little storm, little storm cell rolled in and pushed us out. So we moved it to mats. Had a great time there. Poncho style or not? I saw the Instagram story,

but I didn't see any actual poncho style nachos. I'm not sure that poncho style. Who posted the story about you getting poncho style nachos and then who didn't post the nachos me That's on me. I I was a little toasty by that he's too busy being I was like cuz I was like man I actually want to see these I know I've seen them before but it's always from a distance like I want to see them on

The ground I will have Sunday morning first thing. I thought fuck I forgot what a picture the notch What while the nachos were good these weren't these weren't the? Best put together nachos. I've gotten from there. They were not photographed well. Is it maybe because the waiter didn't know what you were talking about? Probably. The waiter's like, I don't know a poncho style. You have to help me out here.

I was like, oh, okay. Well, he just hit me with a little guac and some refried black beans. That's what they did. No beef steak? Yeah, I got beef fajita meat. Swag. Yeah. Sunday, big family day sister brother-in-law my two nieces came uh came up and we hung out great time cooked out watched a little basketball it was good man what'd you cook um my my brother-in-law kendall did the did the cooking

yeah that sounds about right yeah we grew some shrimp, had salad, and some garlic bread. It was very tasty. Who are you on, Heat or Nugs? I would love for the Heat to win this series. I'm a Jimmy Butler guy. See, I'm just trying to heat up some Nugs, yo. Yeah, I guess that's a joke. Okay, that was...

That's not bad. That's not bad. Yeah, that's it, man. Good weekend overall. What's up? Yeah that's it man good weekend overall what's up yeah um thanks man uh we um laid low friday um you know the uh upcoming scorsese movie please don't squash i see uh is it what is it killers of the flower moon i don't know i bought the book isn't it three hours and 40 minutes yeah that means i'm not going to be able to see it oh i will it'll take me six days to finish it i bought the book and i started the book this weekend um not very far into it um but anyway i went to bed very early friday because i

knew saturday was going to be a long day. You guys remember Phil from Club Cool Fame? I do. Old Phil Battaglia. Yeah, I'm familiar with his game. We went to his child's first birthday party. He was on Peace Park. Remember Peace Park? Parks definitely did a birthday there.

He sure did. Parking there, not ideal. Not ideal, but good time. Good to see Phil, as always went home immediately called an uber said daddy take me to ski shores i'm on a that's the basis i'm on with the uber driver call your uber driver daddy yeah it's cool my dad does drive uber so i should probably tell you that we get out to ski shores one in one out. Everybody's there. Brett, you got to have a special wristband for the Brett Merriman extravaganza.

It was crazy, man. They were the led ones. They glow really like, like, like if you're at a Taylor Swift concert, like, yeah, I don't know how, what kind of budget Brett had for this thing, but let me tell you, I was a little worried getting out there because I think I was, uh uh approximately one beer deep getting out there and i was these guys have been brett's been going since noon he's been doing the ski thing dylan i didn't know if you'd been skiing or not but did you go on the boat with them i did not go on the boat with them no i forgot to mention i got aggressively hit on at ski

shores it was great it was good for the old ego needed it needed it it was good what happened woman walks out there's b-lines for me and she clearly she clearly came off the lake and she had been uh she'd been drinking a little bit i think that leg monster got her she i was in there just talking to ben and she's like uh are you straight and i said yeah sure yeah yeah for sure and she said are you interested And I said, yeah, sure am. Yeah, for sure. And she said, are you interested?

I was like, not right now. And she's like, okay, great. And she walked away. And I was like, that was quick. That was efficient. I appreciate the forwardness. We live near a boat launch, and if you go out there on a Saturday, and if you have Rosie with you or something, drunk girls just come up to Rosie and they're all over them.

I'm like, guys, this is kind of annoying. Please get the, like, they're not even, they're not, they're not even looking at me,

but like the drunk coming off the boat, just feeling confident and happy and everything. Like there's a real, there's a real like air to those people. She had her big, you know, wide brim sun hat on and she was, she was on one.

She was having a great time. You should try that. I want, I want guys guys at home i want y'all to walk up i want to see if because i'm feeling there might be like a double standard because if a guy tries this i don't know how it's gonna go randy what are you laughing at is this your move what what randy you think it would go well to a woman and said that randy's i don't know randy r know. Randy's just bold facing us. He's not saying a word. He's just over there with his tiny t-shirt. He's not telling us something. How tiny is that t-shirt? What shirt

is this? Is that a Vegas nice shirt? Yeah. It's a regular shirt. It's a regular shirt, he said. I'm going to have more on my Matt Salarancho order later in the show. But let me tell you, the most inconsistent. You haven't seen the end of the rundown? I guess not.

You should scroll down and see what the segment's called. Okay. It's good. I like it. Can't wait. It was a good time. I would say that our table was probably a B-minus table. Wasn't in the main dining hall. And it was kind of tucked away in a corner

and I kind of was facing the wall. Other than that, delightful time. Don't put baby in the corner. Nobody puts baby in a corner. That corner table you guys were sitting at has got a weird vibe to it sometimes. You're right. That room is not the vibiest of rooms.

No, no. Yeah, it changes things. Actually, it's the least vibey room in the restaurant. Yeah. Yeah, there's vibier places.'s facts that's facts yesterday man just not much just hung out kind of licked my wounds a little bit hair the dog with the four corners out of dallas shout out good time watch some sports pretty low-key weekend minus the four or five-hour stretch Saturday afternoon and evening. What about you? Are we going to do a separate pod for your week?

It was a big weekend. Thursday, woke up real early. 3.45 a.m. alarm. Flew up to Michigan. Had the stiffest back in northern Michigan when I showed up, went and played a course that's pretty hard to get on. Golf guys love talking about this course called Crystal Downs. Difficult course. Numerous putts were putted off the green. You can check the gin out for my score. I did shoot in the two figures, not three figures. So that's big for me. And it was a good time. So yeah, I was up in Northern Michigan next day, played 36. I haven't played 36 in a while. And I think it'll be the last time I play 36 for a minute because my body is absolutely ruined right now. Wait, at what point did you text me that we need to play more golf? Mid 36.

Will's feeling himself. Yeah, mid 36. But we absolutely need to play more golf. when I was actually out on the course, I was having so much fun. It had been a while since I had played that much golf in such a concentrated time. So the courses we hit, because I know a lot of, I'm sure some backers will reach out. Crystal Downs, which is difficult to get on. The next day, we played Harbor Point Golf Course,

which was the course that I grew up playing, and then in the afternoon, we played a nice little gem in Northern Michigan called Hidden River Golf and Casting Club. Had a delightful dinner there. Shout out to the trout. And then the next day, we played a nice little gem in northern Michigan called Hidden River Golf and Casting Club. Had a delightful dinner there. Shout out to the Trout. And then the next day, we went and played Bay Harbor Golf Course. Mike Trout was there?

Yeah, Mike Trout. Yeah. Is that the one that has that black couch in Pro Shop? What is David doing? Yeah. Can you explain the reference? It's just kind of like their thing. It's like their logo on all their hands.

I very much enjoyed being up there. I got to see my parents. Got to hang out with them for a while. Got to drink a few Oberons. You guys are fans of Oberons, right? I like Oberons. We've done those. Yeah.

Yeah. They're fewer and far between now down here in Austin. It's kind of a bummer. Yeah. I feel like I haven't seen those in a while. Yeah. I went to the store the other day. The only Bell's beer they had there

was a bunch of IPAs and light IPAs, drinkable IPAs. What do you guys think about the all-day IPAs, the ones that you're supposed to, you know, they're kind of dialed down a little bit? I prefer those. Yeah, I think I do too at this point. I think it's like responsible for me to do those at this point.

Heavy IPA just has too much bite to it. I can't do it. Yeah. I probably need a limited IPA. It's a little harsh. I didn't even know that was a thing a little harsh in the palate will yeah i agree i agree i think the the the bells half-hearted ale is a little too dialed down but overall i think i'm gonna try to start doing some uh lower octane stuff what was the what was the attire was this quarter zip in the morning, then pop it off four holes in? Not ideal to go up to Michigan to get some cooler weather

and be sweating the entire time. I mean, I forced a quarter zip the day that I arrived, took it off before we even teed off. The next day, I made it to hole number nine wearing a quarter zip, had to peel it. It was pretty hot for northern Michigan it's pretty rare that you're getting in the 80s up there oh damn especially this early in the season but yeah yep as you can tell I got a little sun Sally was not impressed

with yeah he's only two that's that was good that was good it took me a second you can't be mad about that took me a second took me a second. You can't be mad about that. It took me a second. It took me a second. But yeah, Northern Michigan is turning into a just absolute golf mecca. Every dude in the airport yesterday was just decked out in country club gear and golf stuff. They all looked a little beaten down. A lot of people theragunning their legs while they were watching the playoff hole. Oh, my God. It was a great vibe up at that airport. I loved pulling out the Theragun at the airport.

Guess how long I sat at the airport before I got on my plane yesterday. I arrived a little early. Three hours. Three and a half hours. That's some dad shit. I like it. It was not an ideal situation.

Yesterday was one of the worst travel days I've ever had with no delays. Take the early flight, people. Also, go take your Nutrafol. Mmm. Yeah. I took mine this morning. You don't have to choose between better hair growth and your health.

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I'm trying. I'm trying to do it with Nutrafol. It's what I've been doing. It's the number one dermatologist-recommended hair growth supplement clinically shown to improve hair growth, thickness, and visible scalp coverage. Are you guys familiar with nutraceuticals? No. Learn yourself something.

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You, too, can grow thicker, healthier hair and support our show by going to Nutrafol.com and entering promo code CIRCLING to save $10 off your first month's subscription. This offer is only available to U.S. customers for a limited time, plus free shipping on every order. Get $10 off at Nutrafol.com, spelled N-U-T-R-A-F-O-L, .com, promo code CIRCLING. That was a good ad read, Will.

Dude, people are surprised by how with it i am after this weekend really i feel terrible it's great is it just it's more so the the body yeah it's not like a hangover feeling at this point it's more just like i'm too old to play that much golf and that's a sad realization to have were the boys boys there gunning each other? No, we were just, we were just massaging each other. We just did some hot oil massages after the rounds just got lubed up together. That's a business idea I had back in the day. I couldn't get funding. Funding was not secured. It was like a, a trailer that would pull up to golf courses and it was hot oil massages. And's like a subscriber thing a membership there's perks too we had a cold plunge turns out not that many people were into it was a little bit ahead of my

time anyway now i'm here i want a cold punch so bad yeah i would do anything for a cold plunge i told you about my app idea scratchies right the back scratch app it's like it's like an in-house massage, but just for a back scratch. You don't need a professional assistant. You can swap out. You can scratch each other too. Scratchies. Oh, dude.

Look into it. Is it above closed touching? Yeah, that's the idea. Can you do it with your jeans on? Once you're behind closed doors, it's really up to you. Sally's very selfish when it comes to back scratches versus me. Like, if I do it to her, I do it for an extended period of time. And when I ask her to do it, it's 60 seconds and out.

I'm a very giving person. I'll scratch your back. I enjoy doing it. I don't get them in return. It just doesn't happen. Dude, I don't even get them from our hair person anymore. She used to do scratchies all the time on your shoulders before we get out of there. I never get scratchies anymore. She gave you scratchies? I used to get – yeah. Scratchies were a thing back in the day. She never gave me scratchies. Oh, early days with her, she asked, like, you want scratchies?

I mean, she gave me like a little scalp massage when she was shampooing my ship. No, no. This was straight up scratchies on there. I've seen those scratchies. She would go like this. Yeah. She would go like this. She was afraid you were going to enjoy it a little too much.

She's going to get a strongly worded text message. She also doesn't use – she used to have like a construction grade massager that she used to do. It's still sitting on the thing, but I never get the offer. That thing's a little much. Those are, no, I love those. I think it was kind of great. It just rattles your body. Anyway, find me on Scratches, at D Shivery.

Hey, I know we have a story to do, but when I was home, so my dad had shoulder surgery, so in the shower shower there's one of those long brushes so he can get his back i kind of want one yeah i kind of want that i want that option to really exfoliate back there because there's there's parts of my back yeah i'll just tell you right now you've never even seen them it's not getting scrubbed there's like that little like two or three square inches of space you can't reach well you're a you're a no no washing the legs guy right no it's so just yeah it falls it runs down i wash my legs i do i'm not just saying that to

to protect myself but i understand the thinking there i understand why some people don't hey i just sweat too much i gotta scrub the entire thing i have a uh go ahead no you don't i'll do mine let the scratches guy talk I have a friend. Y'all know him. I've talked about him before. He does a lot of gross stuff, weird, gross stuff. When he showers, he showers every day, but only about once every four or five times does he use shampoo and soap.

It's just a rinse. Oh, he's a European fella. I mean, shampoo is fine. If you're doing that every four showers, that's fine. But he doesn't do body wash? He just gets in, he rinses off, and he'll throw his clothes on and go to work. Like, if you're doing that every four showers, like, that's fine. But he doesn't do body wash? He just gets in, he rinses off, and he'll throw his clothes on and go to work. Dude, he's a naturalist. He's really gross.

I kind of respect it. No, you shouldn't. I don't. I don't. Dave, do your thing now. I realized that what I was going to say would not really apply to Will. Was it about scratchies and how you want to invest? No, Will, because I was going to circle back to something will said what will said he'd do anything for a cold punch

and i was going to say well why don't you just go to the gas station get a bunch of ice and then i was um not to put will on front street he didn't have a bathtub and that's why i wasn't going to say it why you got to expose me for not having a bathtub dude i'm sorry why you got to do that to me he's he's he's maybe maybe i could sit in fritz's little inflatable bathtub that's in our steam shower he's got a steam shower he's doing just fine it kills me that we don't have a bathtub fritz loves getting in a bath if we're if we're traveling somewhere and we get in the bath he's all about it dylan why did what is this video you just sent me called tub girl dude i'll just think about how scratchies is gonna take off dude it might do you think scratchies has more

um more potential or still got it oh still got it still got it that's like week two no that might have been episode like i think that might have been episode two of touching base i think still got it is more's like week two. No, dude, that might have been episode like – I think that might have been episode two of Touching Base. I think Still Got It is more like a flash-in-the-pan success. It's going to get real hot and people are going to be like, okay. And then kind of it'll – they'll stop using it. But Scratchies, it's just going to slowly build and become just an absolute juggernaut of an app.

I mean, what if – I worry Scratchies is going to like go too far and there's going to be like pimps that are pimping out people to like go scratch bags. I could take it two different angles. I could make it just like a dating app matching situation. Why is Randy laughing? It's really distracting when he laughs, and we don't know what it's about.

Dave just DM'd me, look up tub girl. And I said I'm not going to do that. Yeah, if you're listening at home, please don't do that. So you could match with a fellow scratcher in your area yeah and just and meet up and scratch each other's backs or you could just order them and pay for it and they come and scratch your back and leave there should be like um tiers of scratchers so like you could be like the highest tier like an elite scratcher your profile pic just shows your nails you know it's like i got no one's gonna choose me no one's gonna match with me i got yeah i'm not i'm not good for the scratchies app because yeah unlike

a you don't need to be licensed you know it'd be like a license anything you just show up you should probably do background checks probably but it'll be like you'll get a rating like uber you know no that's it you can just go to the dermatologist to look at their back anyone can sign up scratchers can sign up scratchies or scratchers you know i'm telling you ma'am check it out okay check what out you don't have it it'll be up should we talk about these aliens yeah what's going on i'm having to edit the entire rundown right now because we just went on a seven minute tangent about bro that's what the guys are at their best though yeah no one's still my idea i'm watching you okay if you don't want people to see your idea don't talk about it on a

small to mid-sized podcast like it's not that it's not that hard to figure out is there some kind of ip claim no i said it out loud. Nope. Nope. Okay. Very cool. We got some alien news. J-Bone already bought the domain. Yeah, J-Bone already owns it.

He's got all the social handles. I'll sub-lesson it to you. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, we've got – we do have some alien news, Will. See, I don't like how much alien news is currently coming out because as somebody who I think is the biggest skeptic in the office about aliens, I'm starting to really turn here and I'm starting to get a little worried. If there's physical evidence of aliens being here, that's when I start to get a little scared. Depending on the day, what mood you catch me in, I believe, in aliens and then I won't the next day.

Do you ever wonder if we're the visitors? No. Hmm. I'm kind of on the other end of the spectrum here. I think it's weird when people don't, like, think that. Well, I think that there are definitely – I think there are things out there. I don't think that it's some advanced society that is, like, going to, like, come slice our throats and, you know. I think the chance that there's not other living creatures out there

is pretty much zero. But what do they look like? Are they going to be a developed society? Are they going to want to come check on us? No, I think there's little amoebas crawling around places and weird water. There's too many people who have similar stories. But we don't have to go down that.

But I do like the idea that they came all this way and they just slice our throats like old school style like you know they don't use like lasers or like they can do like it's like they just they just old school i just don't get why we all think that aliens look like they're supposed to look like there's you don't see too many other variations of what they look like it's always like the big head it's the it's a little alien standing there having to pee in the middle of the night some more yeah but people consistently who you know believe them or not that's that's what they they say they see anybody who's i don't know talked about having a run-in or been abducted i don't know anyway well they've done a good seg

they've done a transmission designed to mimic correspondence from an extraterrestrial civilization that made its way to Earth from Mars. So they sent communication from Mars to Earth to see what would happen. So is this conveniently the planet that we all speculate has other life forms? People talk about martians and shit well yeah we've seen mars attacks too right that was a pretty cool documentary but it's always it's like it's always mars right because i guess it's the most like earth-like planet i don't know right like marvin the martian like haven't we proven that like there aren't just like little dudes like marvin the martian walking around mars believe it or not that's a

fictional character do they actually get Mars bars from Mars? Yeah. Well, this says, the message went out on May 24th from the ExoMars Trace Gas Orbiter. Totally know what that is.

A spacecraft launched in 2016 that's orbiting Mars to study its atmosphere. The transmission traveled across space for 16 minutes before being successfully

picked up by three observatories. The Allen Telescope in Northern California, the Green Bank Telescope in Northern California, the Green Bank Telescope in West Virginia, and the Medicina Radio Astronomical Station

near Bologna, Italy. That was my Davide. Pretty good. Pretty good. She's a liar. Dude, we are about to be Love Island boys. The Love Island boys.

Sorry. I don't know what I'm doing anymore. People will pay for that. Now they're letting people, just normal people, try to decipher this message so we can try to decode this stuff. So we're advancing our communication in space in order to make sure that we are on the same page as these fucking aliens.

Yeah, it's just a test. It's a test. some might say it's a distraction we don't know who the next story yeah hit us with this dave this is the one that's got people uh really fired up a former intelligence official turned whistleblower has given congress and the intelligence community inspector general extensive classified information about deeply covert programs that he says possess retrieved intact and partially intact craft of non-human origin. Let's see it. That's what I want to see. That's what I want to see. You're not going to see it. Hey, don't tell me about it. Show me about it, man. Yeah. Don't tell me about the birth. This guy's allegedly a whistleblower. Very convenient that he also worked in intelligence.

So you have to wonder. You have to look at it with a hint of skepticism and be like, okay, well, what? So this guy's just out like, what are they about to do? Who's about to get money? Or what story are they trying to distract us from? They're going to drop some alien stuff. Because they know all the pods. You drop an alien story, that's what we're leading with.

Is the whistle that he's using, does it have like a certain frequency to contact the aliens? Is it like a dog whistle? Okay. Dude, how sick would it be if like the aliens were like, they had like their own NBA finals?

I don't know how to answer that, man. What? It'd be pretty cool. Yeah. And the whistleblower was the ref. Referees. Oh, okay. Marvin the Martian was the ref. Referees. Oh, okay. Marvin the Martian was the referee.

That's right. Was he? It actually ties in. Dude, it's actually, it's all kind of making more sense now. How about that? Looney Tunes and an alien. So he was, you know. Did y'all see Space Jam 2?

Yeah, it was really bad. That's what I heard. Really bad. So LeBron's performance wasn't as good as he was in that Amy Schumer movie? He was low-key pretty good in that movie. He was great in Trainwreck. In Space Jam, it's like he'd never been in front of a camera in his life. I think he should have gotten a Best Supporting Actor nom for Trainwreck.

He was great. He was funny. He was a scene-stealer in that movie. He and Bill Hader had good chem. That's short for chemistry. Don't say they had good chem. They had good chem. Bitch. So where are they storing? Where are they allegedly storing this stuff? I don't say they had good cam they had good cam bitch so where are they storing where are they

allegedly storing this stuff i don't know this guy had all of the access to this stuff with his security clearance and why can't they just show us a freaking picture pull out your iphone and take something and there yeah how is one person with security clearance not like taking some photos and putting them on the ground that's so frustrating do you ever wonder if we're it's this is all a big bluff yeah like it's like you're just trying to act like you want uh your adversaries uh in the world to be like oh fuck they got some shit they got the they got the flux capacitor or whatever it does it does seem like it's always americans too right well Well, we consume mainly American media. Right, but if this happened in Yugoslavia...

What, you're saying Yugoslavians don't respect aliens? I'm just saying we would probably still hear about it. If it happened in Guatemala, we would probably hear about it. Just saying, it's always Americans. I'm not a part of the Guatemala news cycle. If it happens in England, then I might be in there. That news would travel across oceans, I would think. Yugoslavia, famously not a country anymore.

Yeah. I wanted to point that out. Yeah. Formerly Yugoslavia, which of course everyone knows modern day is – Yeah. For sure. Man, you should just not show us your board. Well, obviously everyone knows what it is.

Like, we don't have to explain that to anybody. It used to be a place. Brandy? It's like Serbia and Croatia and all that. Like, there was a big, like, civil wars and stuff. That kind of broke apart. Balkans? Pretty sure.

Czech Republic? I don't know. Formerly Czechoslovakia. Yeah, I don't know where that is in relation. My European geography, much like yours, is not good. Mine's not great. Yeah, that's what I said. Have you considered checking yourself before you wreck yourself?

I wasn't going to Google Yugoslavia to make sure it's still a country. Hopefully I didn't offend anybody. I don't know if that's a thing. Oh, wow. Hopefully it wasn't. Dylan, sorry that you were offended. No, I hope I didn't offend someone. I don't know.

Randy, Randy's cracking up. I don't know what went down over there. Look at Randy, the do you know guy. He's just so condescending. He is. He knows it all. Randy has in the past laughed at things that I've gotten wrong, only to be wrong himself, and I was proven right.

COVID-19. Yeah, bud. What? What about COVID-19? I said COVID-19 was named that because it was discovered in 2019. He starts cackling behind his fucking computer over there like the biggest idiot in the world. I look it up.

Sure enough, I was exactly right. I'll admit, he was wrong. Yeah, no, it's now Croatia, Montenegro, Serbia, Slovenia, Bosnia, and Herzegovina? I don't know how to say that one. And Macedonia. You learned a little something today. No Czech republics. The only way that I keep track of what

countries are still countries is by European soccer qualifiers. Stuff like that. I'm like, oh, I guess they're playing Macedonia today. Can I read you a little something? Okay. Grush said the recoveries of partial fragments through and up to intact vehicles have been made for decades through the present day by the government

its allies and defense contractors analysis has determined that the objects retrieved are of exotic origin non-human intelligence whether extraterrestrial or unknown origin, based on the vehicle morphologies and material science testing and the possession of unique atomic arrangements and radiological signatures, he said. Huh. Wow. Digest that. I don't know if I'm – it's going to take me a minute. What did I just say?

Read it back to me in your own words. Paraphr's see them aliens yeah that's it right that's it nailed it i mean let's see them i feel like i don't know i just hey i feel like if there's just like fragments of things like i don't are we just dumb and like we see them we don't realize what it is we just think it's like junk from like a shitty truck or something that fell off like the side of the road just truck junk i mean like us someone's like straight up muffler it was just like on the side of the road by my place the other day that's a bad place to be you guys might want that like truck nuts that car's got to be very loud don't even talk to me about truck nuts the fact that you guys let kj not have truck nuts on his car just because they, quote, fell off on his drive back to Dallas.

I don't believe that. It's like, whatever. For the record, I believe that that did not happen. Yeah, he stopped at Bucky's, and he took them off of his car and then claimed that they fell off. Come on, man. Those don't just fall off. But you've created a culture around here of welching on bets.

It's disgusting. So for the record, I have to do a combine video that I want to do. I cannot sprint right now because running routes on the Academy livestream It's disgusting. So for the record, I have to do a combine video that I want to do. I cannot sprint right now because running routes on the Academy livestream, I have done something to where the hamstring meets the glute, and it would be unwise for me to sprint right now. So you're going to run like an 8-second 40? I bet I could do sub-7 right now.

Should we do a fast walk 40 where you can't have your feet leave the ground? You have to have one foot on the ground at all times? I don't hate that. It is an Olympic 40? It's an Olympic sport. Speedwalking. Speedwalk. Because I don't... It would be kind of a bummer if there was a combine video here,

and then suddenly... It would be a bummer if you got injured, and you were just down bad for the next week because you wanted to sprint for the first time. I saw Dan at Ski Shores. How's he doing? Does he have both of his legs wrapped?

No, there's no wrap. It's partial tear of the calf. It's tough. It sounded, yeah. Poor Dan. Oh, Dan. Oh, Dan.

He's just going to go extra hard on upper body though. So he's probably going to get real jacked. That sounds about right. I love that. Well, does he have any row gear from Academy?

Are we done? He might. He should. Because think about it. If he injured himself doing something athletic, this stuff is good looking enough that you can wear it anywhere. You don't have to wear it to the gym. You know what I mean?

That's a really good point. Yeah, because Dan's always trying to get in the zone. But now he's just trying to get out for the day. And and rose got a collection of on-trend closet staples made for whatever you're up for i really really do love their stuff i do i it's great actually i asked y'all earlier where's the box of the rose stuff because i want some more sweat we have so much of it i pulled some more shorts out today it won't weigh you down with loud neons oversized logos impractical fabrics row includes a classic palette, inclusive tailored fit that'll always be on trend and versatile enough for errands, dinner, or even a low-key evening. The collection features shorts, pants, joggers,

polos, t-shirts, long sleeves. They got a ton. And you can mix and match all the colorways with sizes ranging from small to 2XL. I mean, they have everything we need. Sweat wicking fabrics, hidden pockets, a tailored fit. You look good in this stuff. The shorts are phenomenal. The t-shirt that I wore on the live stream has become one of those shirts where if it's at the top of the pile, it's getting put on for my chilling moments at home. That's the shirt I found myself reaching for first these days. You're saying you're chilling the most in your row?

Mm-hmm. Oh, yeah. Mm-hmm. And they got that tonal palette. I love all the colors that they've got going on. They all look good, and they pair well with each other. It just works. And if you're looking for reliable staples and accessible price point,

then shop Rowe sold exclusively at Academy Sports and Outdoors. Visit academy.com slash Rowe or a location near you to shop today. What's going on with Zuck? If you listen to the sports vehicle here at Washed Media, it's called Too Much Dip. One of the hosts on there claimed that not only could he take Zuck in combat, but it wouldn't be close. Like he would just absolutely mollywop the guy that that house was dylan and he's here now but we're not here to talk about

that bold claim by the way i've spent a lot of time thinking about it and i've considered everything it's like this guy's been training a lot he's in probably really good shape um and i would like to reissue um the exact same take okay oh yeah i was hoping you would do this i was hoping you were going to do this i would absolutely pulverize this little dweeb how tall is he what's what are his what are his vitals oh he's five seven are we sure about five seven more than anything else is that he has the nerd gene that i don't have he's not he's not athletic he's not coordinated he's just a nerd times a billion there's a lot of nerds who do jujitsu a guy like that just not gonna take me dave it's not honestly not enough people account for the nerd gene he's he's got it and it being the nerd gene i think i have a little bit of it it's

really hard to overcome in fact i don't think you can i think i have a little bit of it yeah athletically speaking i think if i worked out like every single day and like hard i still don't think i'd ever get to like a point where people were like damn that guy's fucking shredded no you would i don't think i could actually get there doesn't make you a good athlete though it just makes you in good shape it's different i've got great balance i've got some of the best balance in in the office i mean my balance is unbelievable if i could get you shredded it's just the strength portion for me zuck zuck would probably beat me up so i'm not proud of that new york times did this write-up about zuck and how he's getting into this like workout craze and doing jujitsu and all that. I didn't read it, but I did read a record.

I did read the highlights, though, from another source, the Daily Mail, because it's free. And the funny part here is there's a claim that he was choked unconscious in one of the matches. And it says that in the New York Times article. And Zuck, when reached for comment, and Metta for that matter, said that didn't happen. No. Didn't get knocked out.

Sure. Didn't get choked out. So they're calling fake news? He's calling fake news. That's pot calling kettle black if I've ever seen it. They're actually saying, well, while the referee they asked the referee he said i heard i heard mr zuckerberg snoring and i assumed he was unconscious and i stopped the fight he lost the fight obviously zuck is saying no no i wasn't snoring i was grunting you know it is nick there's probably a uh like first of all what kind of exhibition was this

because are you allowed to choke out zuck that's the thing like jujitsu if he's got any if he's got any people with him anyone in his crew i feel like they would not like they would never let him actually get choked out because like what if something bad happened if you're matched up against mark zuckerberg billionaire founder of facebook like i i feel like i wouldn't be able to like i'd get him in position like okay you're going easy you're going easy on him i'm just saying like i don't know if i would feel comfortable choking out someone of that status you know what i mean wait so hold on we gottaage this. What I'm saying makes sense. What Dylan's saying is that Dylan could take him, but Dylan's not willing to take him. No, I'm saying like is Zuck and Zuck's team allowing him

to get choked out in a combat exhibition like that? You know what I mean? Yeah, it appears so. He moves markets, David. That's part of the risk. But Micah didn't get choked out. He was in the fist exhibition. He moves markets, David. That's part of the risk. But Micah didn't get choked out. He was in the fist exhibition. He didn't.

He did get power bombed, but he held his own. It would have been really funny if Micah just got randomly choked out. Yeah. We would have had that forever. No one takes Micah's back. You got to know that. I got choked out voluntarily once to see what it was like. Some people are into that.

And I got to tell you, I don't want to do it again. I don't think I've ever been choked out. I was out for like 10 seconds, but it felt like I was out for hours. Really? Yeah. I've never passed out or anything. Like from like a physical action. Yeah.

It's a weird sensation. Yeah, I've never fainted. I had vertigo in high school. What was the thing everyone in high school did? You'd have like... Whippets? Spin the bottle? No. I've never fainted. I had vertigo in high school one time. What was the thing everyone in high school did? You'd have like... Whippets? Spin the bottle?

No. You'd have like your... People would make each other pass out all the time. Door knob? Do you know what... No. Nothing I'm saying is ringing a bell? No, I mean...

I'm gonna hit the group text later and I'll circle back. I don't remember. I know... I don't know the name of it. I think there was a... There was like a thing where you were supposed to bend over and breathe hard or something, and then someone did something to you,

and then you'd pass out. And then I remember our school being like, hey, stop doing that. People are just passing out in the locker room. My urologist can help you with that. Anyway, I do think it's really funny because Zuck said that never happened. And you can just picture him.

Just admit it. I tend to believe Zuck because he's the kind of guy that's like, hey, man, yeah, I'm a white belt. I'm learning. You're going to get choked out. You're going to lose sometimes. So I feel like he would own it. Now, I wonder what this does to the stock price. Like if your CEO is just getting choked out on the reg.

Yeah, it's tough. This is Succession Season 5. Is it? I feel like you get street cred if you get choked out like i don't think that's like a bad thing like it's not like it's not hard i would respect him more yeah like that means that you're actually doing this stuff like i kind of think that he needs to own getting choked out do you snore when you get choked out like i kind of figured you just go silent i don't know i think yeah i think you can but i feel like do you snore immediately like is it immediate snoring i guess if your head what was this whistleblower doing while he's just snoring

right there that's a that's weird no i was grunting how's there no video of this i would love to see a video of zuck just like there is video oh there is i i think it's not good quality but it was revealed in september last year that zuck has taken up mixed martial arts with his trainer describing him as a silent killer in the ring oh sure yeah i'm sure he is much like so they call him sugar oh that's good silent killer dude that would that would be my my stage name if i was a wrestler or something my wrestling name sugar i was on your shivery that's not bad that's not bad sugar shivery is pretty good actually i uh i was on sugar shivery. That's not bad. Very bad. It's not bad. Sugar shivery is pretty good. Actually. I,

I was on Twitter yesterday. You guys familiar with this app? Yeah. And somebody liked to tweet from a long time ago. That was me ratioing you. And it was the wrestling one. Do you remember this? And I went back and watched that and I was like, man,

I had so much time on my hands that weekend. Like, did I not have a kid yet? Cause I had, I had way too much fucking time. Zuckerberg has explained that training is really important to him and it helps to maintain his energy level and focus. That's good.

I bet he's way more focused than you. That's why I think not only does he take you, but he embarrasses you in broad daylight. Wait, you think that one of the world's richest men might be more focused than Dylan? I do. I do. He should be thanking me for not taking his father hostage

when we had a chance to do that dude so wait you won't choke out a billionaire but you'll you will kidnap his father i'm not saying i won't choke out a billionaire i'm saying like that's a it's a it's not like choking out a regular joe it's like this guy's if something went wrong here like i'm a lot of fingers pointing at me you know i mean he did like this is the guy this is the guy that choked out the guy that killed zuck in the ring accidentally you know i mean he didn't wake up wouldn't stop snoring i don't like that elon's taller than me he's a big lie it's allegedly six two yeah he didn't look that tall when i saw him should have beat his ass do you want to know some other celebs that are probably based on size

no elon's getting fucked up by Zuck. I don't know. It's kind of like when you're a little kid punching a fat dad or something. He's also got the nerd gene. It's two nerd genes going against each other. It'd be a great fight. Were you just punching fat dads? No, but you know when you're a little kid, you're roughhousing with an uncle or something?

You're giving them body blows, and they're just eating them. Phil Margera? Yeah, exactly. Exactly. That's a perfect example. He's on his lunch break trying to use the bathroom. You run in there and just punch him 100 times while he's on the toilet. It's like, okay.

Ben, stop. With his shirt off for no reason at all. Here's some celebs that also are participating in the jiu-jitsu life. You got Tom Hardyy we knew that russell brand henry cavill and guy ritchie henry cavill on the mat that's a problem i'll be afraid of getting a wrestling match with him would you choke him out you'd probably be like might get a little too excited oh yeah get me you get me henry chuck me out dude oh no i can't breathe oh choke me daddy henry please don't choke me. I'm on the bottom.

Is he the new Superman or whatever? Batman? Dude, we need a new Bond. Bond. I need the Bond news. Tired of it. Tired of it. Cabo would crush that role.

Cavs. He gets annoyed. I saw a video. Someone put together a super cut video of him reacting to women fawning over him and he gets really annoyed by being objectified by women. Who?

Henry Cavill. Really? Yeah. He's like, okay, I get it. Please. Most people don't have that problem. I don't have that problem. I don't either.

I don't get objectified very often. Do you think anybody walks up to him and asks are you straight are you single you straight oh you're interested he is in the conversation for next bond but uh he's he'd be great what's fucked up is they floated uh maybe it was just tabloids they're saying idris elba and this is like a 10 years ago and now idris elba is like he's probably too old to be Bond, right? Yeah, he's 14 to 1 right now on the odds. Idris?

Yeah. What's Cavill? 3 to 1. Oh. He's not the favorite, though. He's not the favorite. Who is it? James Norton?

I don't know who that is. I'm not familiar with his game. The antivirus guy. James Norton. He's been in a BBC police drama called Happy Valley, for which he was he's been in a bbc police drama called happy valley for which he was nominated for a bafta in the first series in 2015 this guy why would he get nominated in the bathtub that's weird that's weird he's a good looking dude he's no henry cavill yeah but who is i think they're trying to pivot a little bit though you know they want to go young they want him young

i think this role's starting to break these guys' bodies down. Like, Daniel Craig was probably gassed after all this. Yeah. He looked really good, though. He got in really good shape. This dude just doesn't do it for me. But then again, I'm not really familiar with his game. Give me Tom Hardy.

I mean, I'm still on my Cavill shit right now i know i kind of am too kind of him too he was in uh that mission impossible movie right he was he played like a badass type and he crushed that role he did yeah turns out that mission was possible it seems like all of them are yeah which is weird interesting pretty good track record completing the impossible missions dave's a mission impossible guy i'm a bond guy what is dylan i enjoy both of those series okay i like bond too i also like born i prefer bond but i i really like mission impossible is just kind of fun i didn't love born really yeah i liked it didn't love it i never i never did the jeremy renner

born maybe i need to dip into that it was better than i thought it was gonna be no like all the reviews that i saw of it what people were like that was actually one of my favorite ones went into it paid my nine dollars was like this is gonna suck bond one mission impossible two born three for me jesus christ it's jason born i just like the idea of bond it's a hot dude just doing tight just wearing tuxedos yeah shagging sleeping with hot women snogging he's just getting on secret missions just hollering at the birds yeah yeah yeah i think i'm about that dave do you have a food tag you'd like to issue yeah thanks for asking will if you on poncho style nachos i will come across i was actually hoping not to mention those to the rest of the show but um okay they lookedstyle nachos. I will come across as Dave. I was actually hoping not to mention those for the rest of the show.

Nachos did look fine. Why is LeBron to Dallas trending, Dave? Not to distract you. I'm sure, yeah. Tell me that and I'll just sidetrack my show here. Dave's just on Twitter. You're going to love this. You guys are going to really enjoy this take.

I think chicken flautas are the most underrated, not only Tex-Mex option, I think it's the most underrated food you can eat at a restaurant. Chicken flautas. Chicken flautas. I had some chicken flautas this weekend, Dave. Did you really?

Yes, I did. You had chicken flautas? I went up to a food truck, and we were going to order a burrito, and they said, the only thing we have right now is flautas. And I said, can you make them vegetarian? They said no. So a chicken flauta is shredded chicken rolled up in a tortilla deep fried. I think it's a superior way to consume the substance, the shredded chicken.

I have flauta questions. The way you can dunk it is so fun. The only way to eat flautas is with your hand right you don't you don't cut them up they're kind of difficult to cut uh they're intended to be cut sometimes you can get sometimes you can get really long ones and like do what what's up you might have to cut it because you pick it up you know i'm talking about, I don't. It looked like you were trying to play a recorder. I had no idea. It's too much, too much tortilla. It's like a clarinet.

Like not enough meat. The meat to tortilla ratio is off for me. I would like to see what the meat to tortilla ratio is on a punch on nachos. Oh, fucking got you. He got you. It's great, but there's also other stuff on there. Oh, returned.

But do you ever scratch your mouth with the flauta? They can get pretty crispy sometimes. Sometimes too crispy, dog. Sometimes a little too crispy. I love that crisp, man. You can dunk it. Like, look, you got some queso. You got your guacamole.

You got your salsa. You can just take it and you say, you know what? This is my table. Boom. You're missing one of my top tier dippings for flauta. Sour cream. Oh, sour cream. Give me that crema.

Yeah, you dum-dum. Fair. Fair criticism of my take here. Very fair. I'm just saying it's... I'm saying people look at it and they're like, oh, that's a little kid order. Maybe it is.

I get nachos. But you know what? What if we... Sour chicken strips. Would you ever be willing to do like table flautas? Flautas for the squad? Like, what about table side they they drop right there that ends with somebody getting a splash with some oil no one's deep frying table side that's

a problem i don't know it's your problem micah sent me a message the other day we got a new restaurant coming to town that's doing table side salsa that's my biggest problem with you is that you don't like think like outside the box i bet it's going to be very reasonably priced. What's it called? I don't know. I don't know. Can we just get a restaurant that's just like... It's just called Salsa, but there are no A's in the name of it. Seriously? No, but that could be a thing.

It would just be SLS? Yeah, I don't know. Put it on a hat. People would think it was a skateboarding competition. Sure. There's a skateboarding competition called SLS. I'm the only person that watches it. Okay. I think they're really good. I'm listening to the take. I don't, I don't know if I have a strong feeling one way or the other. I think you, you ride for the flautas at Matt's El Rancho fairly hard to the point where I, I'm starting to think I might need to order some just to see what they're all about. You know, I think you should try.

If you compare it to like what's the comp for a flout? It's like taco because you unroll it and unfry it, and then maybe you have a few more ingredients, and then you've got a taco. But the taco, you have to put the salsa or whatever. You have to add it on. You don't really get to dip or dunk. Now that you're thinking about it, I might start getting floutas for Fritz. He dipping yeah well fritz man he's a flauta guy i don't i don't hate your take it's just not my favorite one you've ever had that's not my your favorite take of mine is it flauta boy summer it can't be everything summer just because you try it once

and like it all right chicken piccata summer i i have been seeing more chicken piccata stuff there's a ton of people. No, you're just noticing it now. No, I have people. Well, I do have people sending it to me. Are you getting a lot of chicken piccata content? Yes. What about scum?

I am getting a lot of scum. Not as much. I don't know if people are ready for scumpy boy summer. So I think we might have to wait. It might be more of a fall or winter play. This dude just said scumpy boy summer. It's not a winter play. It might be. scompy boy summer. It's not a winter play. It might be.

Scompy? I don't know. Maybe like a September? Scompy September? Can I issue a caveat? Sure, man. I don't, I don't like it

when some places will give you the flautas and they will put like sour cream and stuff on top of it. That just takes the fun out of the flauta. Dude, that's what happened to me. It's a very fun dish.

It's these northern Michigan flautas, man. They were absolutely drenched in lettuce, sauce, everything. So you had to fork it. Yeah. I was like, man, fork it. Don't fork my flautas. Fork me. What the fuck's wrong with you? I'm sorry.

I'm sorry. We can edit that out i don't know if i was on the scratches app and i had a fork in my photo that signaled that i was not going to use my hand i was just going to do a little fork action would that be acceptable swipe right on you or would that be like having an upside down pineapple outside of your crib i'm swiping right because i can do a little i can do that i like i like if you bring toys to play have you do have you guys done like have you you done it with a rope? Dude, you're so uncomfortable. Sorry. Oh.

I'm talking about scratches. Have you done the head thing with a, you know what I'm talking about? Like the metal, the metal thing that like tickles your head? I love that. Oh, the. Doing it with. It's like the claw thing that. Yes.

Doing it with a child is the funniest thing in the world. Why does it feel so much better when someone else does it to you then you can do it to yourself because you don't have control over the situation i can help you sit on your hand for like 35 seconds yeah and then do it that's good yeah dogs love those things these things get horny at the end we're gonna start cutting them off like five minutes short i know we just edged the entire podcast that's ridiculous well if you stuck around uh you're welcome i hope you guys stuck around for my food take yeah don't steal my scratches i deleted my story that i was going to talk about you guys want me to dip in real quick you guys heard there's a new trend people are doing solo bachelorette parties why did you delete that i was looking forward to talking about that you

want to talk about real quick yeah these people are going on these bachelor episodes the new york times wrote it up apparently a lot of people are doing this they're going and they're just spending time on their own they're trying to figure out like they're they're they're not going crazy and partying they're just like introspective yeah live laugh love trips enjoying a little solo time for the little solitude for the final time right you're about to get married is that the idea behind i'm already married is that the idea behind i'm already married is that the idea behind it i guess i don't really understand like what if i like i didn't even have a bachelor party but what if i told you guys like yeah um instead of going out with you guys

i'm just going to uh go somewhere completely alone you guys would be like is will okay yeah i'm going i'm going to paris for a week i mean he's not going to leave the hotel room yeah i'm going to a a desolate cabin in Montana for the next week. Okay, Con. You guys would be worried about me. Like, I think you'd go to Montana and make sure that I wasn't, like, up to something. A bachelor slash bachelor party, they're so fucking fun. It's not a party if you have one person.

Right. By definition. Okay. It's a solo trip. I can see if you did, like, a golf thing and you just went and played like a bunch of golf by yourself wouldn't you just rather be with your boys than like paired up with like a bunch of dorks probably what if you get what if you get paired up with like a bunch of dudes that have the dork jeep i prefer my boys to dorks all day give me the boys yeah i appreciate nerds and dorks. You know, I just don't. I do too.

No, the world needs all people. They make the world go round. Yeah, yeah. I'm like, yeah. But they just can't take me in a hand-to-hand competition. That's all I'm saying. If they're a billionaire, you might go easy on them. That's true. This guy reveres the rich.

He reveres the 1%. No, that's not what it is. I think we should eat the rich. Fuck the patriarchy. Mr. Zuckerberg, are you okay? Zuck? Zuck? Move, man. Fuck the patriarchy. Mr. Zuckerberg, are you okay? Zuck? Zuck? Move, man.

Plus, are you breathing? Mark. Zuckerberg. I can see Dylan having Zuck in like a headlock and just whispering to him like, hey, I don't even have a Facebook account, bitch. Yeah, I don't. Suck on that, Zuck. If they said that they'd verify your instagram account

you choked out zuck you're choking out zuck right fuck yeah okay oh he's got he's toast okay i just i'm seeing it where he might like he gets you in an arm bar and breaks your arm and then you like for the next two months you're walking around cast on it's a bad deal am i am i fighting him right now or do i get a month to get some basics oh he's kind of no i'm making that go a little water either way i'm taking him but if i have if i have a uh some time to learn a little bit then it's over you want to learn the skill that he's already what white belt proficient in i think he's why i don't know he might be i don't know in? I think he's white. I don't know. He might be. I don't know what to use.

Don't you start at white? Yeah. Or I don't even know if you have a belt when you start. There's a few people that are like, oh no,

they're getting it wrong. I don't know. But white belt is low. But white belt, they can still fuck you up. I'm not worried about this dude. Okay. I actually went to an arm bar

the other day. They wouldn't let me in because I'm too tiny. Really? Yeah, I got turned away at the door. I think that that's the best thing i didn't know there was such a place yeah a lot of hot dudes in there shredded yeah i can i can imagine i just go in there and try to find the dude the strongest arms and try to find him on scratchies so he can just go to town on me later is on that we get tired what's your scratchies at yeah think about it man

think about it you get ratings you know just like uber so it's like it's no i don't want that level of like security i got a lot of moles yeah i don't want people rating my back they're rating your scratch they rate your scratch ability and how kind you are like oh he was very pleasant you just scratched and left really wonderful it's all you really want. Very respectful scratcher. Yeah, you can leave comments. Good scratcher, but lingered a little bit. Didn't want to leave.

Tried to watch the ball game with me. Yeah. Kind of zoned out a little bit during commercials. He kept using my zip line. That's the real problem. Have you guys finished the entire series? Oh, yeah. Okay. Oh, okay oh yeah okay i've got some episodes to watch i thought about watching them on the plane yesterday but i was like i'm gonna be cracking up and people are gonna think i'm an idiot it's it's a ridiculous show i've really enjoyed the first three episodes the driving crooner baby driving crooner i think is my favorite one so far and i don't know

why even though i did watch your favorite one the most ridiculous concept it's what was your favorite one oh the the silent yeah he pays the audience if he speaks yeah that one is that was really good the way that they're harassing him as he's walking in to to his job it's just great frets and bachelor parties just show up if i talk you get money but i never talk all right we gotta get out of here all right bye you