Circling Back - Emotional Support Animals & Identified Flying Objects

Episode Date: January 6, 2021

Back at full-strength after the holidays. Dillon recaps his ski trip to Colorado, a look back at middle school rollerskating rinks, American Airlines has banned emotional support animals, and apparently the stimulus bill is going to give us a bunch of info on UFOs which is huge for the squad. Support us on Patreon and receive weekly episodes for as low $5 per month: www.patreon.com/circlingbackpodcast (0:00) Fun & Easy Banter (20:40) Dillon Does Colorado (30:00) Is Dave A… Poser? (41:48) American Airlines Bans Emotional Support Animals (49:56) UFO Info Is Being Released (1:01:50) This Weekend in Fun (1:13:47) Brett’s Breaking News Support This Episode’s Sponsors Hims: www.forhims.com/steam (First visit FREE) Sun Basket: www.sunbasket.com (code STEAM for $35 off your order) Rhoback: www.rhoback.com (STELLA20 for 20% off) --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/circling-back/message Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

all right we're back circling back podcast coming to you live from the lodge in austin texas my name is will defri it's my right david carter roth bon giorno good to be here hola class a what's up be here. Hola, Class A. What's up? Not a mucho. Hey, Brett's in here. We got fours. Whoa. Yeah, we're at full strength. Well, kind of. Randy's not here, but we're at full strength pretty much.

Hello. People were saying we were at full strength Monday. No, no, no. Yeah, people say that we were doing addition by subtraction on Monday. I didn't understand what they were referring to. I didn't either. I haven't done times tables or anything like that in a long time. I did something Monday that I don't usually do, and that was listen to a podcast.

You made me laugh. No, I listen to a podcast, circling back. Cool. Thank you for giving us your business. I've got to be honest. Not a bad fucking podcast. I see why people like it, is what I'm trying to say. Good stuff.

You're going to say the levels on Monday were perfect? Of course y'all talked about me a lot, which is, you know, that's fine. I don't know if it was a lot. Yeah, it was quite a bit. Quite a bit. But I'm back. I'm happy to be here. But yeah, you guys are pretty good.

I always check in. If I'm not on an episode, I always check in just to see if i mentioned like in the beginning and like sometimes i get upset when i if you guys just brush over like yeah will's gone but uh you just go past it i i get a little like oh man yeah there have been times i've missed and i i tune in to see what y'all say and sometimes it's absolutely nothing like i guess i just forgot about me the first time i did that um i think it was when I was in Italy. And you guys were contemplating if I was going to get taken. Oh, yeah.

You didn't get taken. I did not. I was taken aback by the beauty of my homeland. You flaunt that asshole over Italy. It makes sense. It makes sense someone would want to take you. That's why there was a concern. I was out there gallivanting on the Ponte Vecchio.

If you got taken in Italy and then Dylan had to go into dad mode and go save you, you're fucked because Dylan's just going to go over there, buy a fedora, drink a bunch of Reiki or whatever it's called. That's in Greece, man. Whatever. You'd end up in Greece somehow. You'd be like, dude, if I'm over here. I couldn't find Dave with this Aperol Spritz. You know they tried in Greece somehow. You'd be like, dude, if I'm over here. I couldn't find Dave, but this Aperol Spritz is here.

You know they tried to take me. They tried to recruit me, take me. The Mafia, La Cosa Nostra. Wow. They were like, hey, man, we really want you to join. I was like, dude, I got this podcast thing. I can't. I feel like that's sort of the thing where they don't take no for an answer.

They just make me do it. Well, no, they were understanding. I made them an offer they couldn't refuse. What was it? Did you give them a podcast? I said, I will give you free social promotion in exchange for you not killing me. Like, hey, we can swipe up now. Yeah, I was like, I got 10K.

We'll give you a swipe up. I hit 10K. They're like, that's what we want to see. How do you say 10K in Italian? I don't know. Verification. Are you verified? I got followed by a verification account that said they could verify me.

Really? Yeah, but I ended up going through the same thought process as Cole Campbell. It's like, wait, why isn't this company verified? They hit me up recently too. Yeah. I was like, yeah, I don't think so. I'm not that gullible. I gave them my password and my social, though.

So I'm at least seeing if they can back it up. But I don't have a lot of faith that it's going to work. Yeah, at some point in the process, they ask you for money. Something we should have done when we hired Brett was just put in his contract. Like, you need to get us verified within a year. Yeah. I don't care what you do. I would have tried much harder on that front if that was, in fact, in my contract.

When we were at Grand X, we used Greg to try to do that. Yeah. He gave it a valiant effort and came up short. He's been eating some ball-hour meals. I don't know if you all have been following Greg. Barath. Barath on Twitter, but he's eating good. Oh, he always eats good.

He's verified. He does a lot of steaks. He does a lot of stuff. He's an interesting person. He's a nice dude. People should go out and check him out. Greg Barath, B-A-R-T-H. It sounds like a Man United striker.

Yeah, he's got that Instagram blue check mark, dude. How many followers? Big game today, Brett. 53 and a half. Oh, wow. He's 53 followers. Thousand. How do you have a half follower?

Y'all are so annoying. I'm already annoyed with y'all. You just got back. I know. Who is it? Yeah, who's the half? Just a little short guy. Type.

That's not cool. He only counts as half. You think that's funny? No, it's not. I'm sorry. Y'all force me. Y'all like painting me into this corner. I'm trying to make a joke out of it.

It's not fair. I paint your corner. No. No. No. Okay. Anyway, he made Dan Bilzerian famous. Or more famous. Much more famous. Yeah, now Dan's... What's Dan up to? He's trying to get

a passport or some shit. He's trying to get citizenship in somewhere in Eastern Europe. Cyprus? Didn't his CBD company or his weed company went to hell? There's been some potential allegations. Might be an investigation. I don't know. Really shocking that that guy would find himself in some trouble.

I don't know if that's true or not, but I've seen things. Some white collar crime. He's the Bills. I can't believe I'm saying this, but if I got a straight offer to switch lives with Dan Bilzerian, I don't think I could do it. I don't believe I'm saying this, but if I got a straight offer to switch lives with Dan Bilzerian, I don't think I could do it. I don't think I could live the life that he lives. No, I don't want that life. He's got that plug on the steroids.

I'm jealous of his bank account, and that is it. No, he's young. He's very young. Yeah, but he's also like 5'2". Is he really? He's so short. We got love for our short kings on this podcast. Yes, yes.

You would beat the shit out of Dylan. But I like being 5'11". You'd fuck Dylan up. Jared. Okay. Jared tried to paint me as 5'10 3 quarters yesterday on Twitter, and I didn't really know how to respond to that. Jared was claiming 5'10", wasn't he?

I'm taller than Jared, just to be clear. Jared's like 5'10", but puts off 5'8.5 vibes. Jared's just Jared, you know? That's Jared! Brett, it did get brought up while you were out before Christmas

of who wins between you and me in a sprint. I did listen to that. And honestly, I have no idea. I don't either. I don't either. I think we need to do it. My money's on Brett. He's got some sneaky athleticism, man.

You'll have me at the start. I might get you by the end of it, though. I'm worried that your legs, the length of your legs. That's all it is. Brett's a favorite. He's a minus 150 fave right now. Please. You'd have me at the start, though.

I like being the underdog. It depends how long we go. You need to be the underdog. I want to go 50 yards. I was going to say 60. Brett strikes me as the kind of guy who's okay at all sports. Not great at anything. A jack of all trades.

Yeah, he's just got some natural ability to get them by in pretty much everything. And I can get you a long way. Some stuff I'm much better at. You give me a grounder to the third, that thing's on a frozen rope. You can make varsity on pretty much any sport, but you might not start. In a small school. You might not start. Put you on varsity.

Okay, so how do you feel about me, Dylan? Here's what I know about me. Here's what I know about me. Here's what I know about me. Arm strength, nah. Nah. Nothing. I can't throw. You can't throw.

But in terms of coordination, my coordination is up there. I'm fine coordinating, but I can't throw for anything. Yeah, I just have the Vortex video just stuck in my brain forever on repeat, and I can't give you athletic credit. That's fair. Based on that video. That's fair. You might excel excel at something i've never seen you on ice skates maybe you're good at hockey i don't know i'm better i think i would get you on hot you would get me you would get me i i'm not i'm not much of a skater these days unfortunately you did me skating uh there's a

cool dad in my neighborhood speaking of skating have you seen the board that has like the thing in the wheel in the middle he his his kid has the little like a malibu barbie vehicle like power wheel type deal and she drives that and he is on the board that's dope and i'm like dude cool dad alert he can do it in the ikea doesn't it's that thing goes off road it's a powerful little wheel it goes fast too yeah it goes off road kind of wall no you can, there's certain models of those that can go on, like, the beach. What? Really? Yes.

What is that thing even fucking called? I don't know. Is it, like, a flywheel or a one-wheel? I want one, but not to take myself places. I just want one to tool around with. Like, I want to rent one for a weekend just to get it out of my system. Just buzzing down to, like, Mikey's apartment. There's a guy who tears to my neighborhood on one.

It goes fast. He wears a helmet. It's, like, it's a... Do you yell at him as he goes by? No. Hey, start up! Do you have the wrist guards on, too? Oh, yeah.

He's got the whole... He's got everything. Hey, drive like your kids live here! Is that what you yell at him? I don't do that. Oh, okay. Hey! I did that the other night.

Somebody drove down my street in a big-ass farm truck, like a 2005 f-250 dude just rolling coal hauling ass going like 50 miles an hour whoa nobody going and i heard it and like everybody like randy looked up i was like what the fuck so i walked out front i went down to the end of the street came back turned around and came back by and i was like oh god are they am i gonna do i stay out here do i go in pull out the you're going to pull out the MAC-10 and spray your house? I stood there – no, they didn't.

Oh. They didn't do a drive-by shooting on my home, though. Oh, okay. I stood there, arms crossed, just kind of waiting to see, and they were friends with the neighbor's kids a few houses down. Cole and Tyler? And I was like – in my head, I was like, if it wasn't nighttime, would I say something? I don't know.

Or would I ever say something? You know, I don't want to be that guy. But at the same time, it's like, dude, there are a ton of kids and pets in this neighborhood. We live across from a park. It's just like, come on. It's one of those moments growing up that you know every red-blooded American dad is going to run into at some point.

Do you yell at the guy going too fast down your street? Like, it wasn't just oh he's kind of speeding it was hauling ass for no reason probably drunk you know what my dad used to do tennis racket you're just assuming he's drunk yeah yeah they're just stupid tennis racket tennis ball you see a car that that does that on down burgoyne ave whack next time you saw really yeah my dad's that's hard dude that Really? Yeah. That's hard, dude. That's hard. That's hard shit.

At his peak. He was 6'3", 260. You see Dave coming out with the... Dude. Dave got that stick on him. Dave keeps that thing on him. He puts the Babalot in his hands. It's over for you, hoes.

Nobody mess with him. No. Just a forehand. Can we get some official business out of the way? OB? First and foremost. Yesterday, we did something special. We recapped the new Bachelor premiere.

We put a free preview on this very feed that you're listening to this on right now. If you're not optimized or if you're kind of thinking about dipping your toe into some optimized content, now's the time. Bachelor season, the getting's good. The getting's real good. You can get in, get out for just five bucks a month. If you want to get every single piece of Patreon content we have, go to patreon.com slash circlingbackpodcast.

But we'll be reviewing every single episode. I'm not sure next week if it's on Tuesday or not because of the Natty Champ game. Don't say Natty Champ game. Because of the Natty Champ game. Good point. It probably is on Tuesday. Hard to say. But either way, we're doing every episode.

We hope you enjoy. We hope we can earn your business. Go make it happen. And as always, we get Friday voicemails every single time. Give it a call. What's the number? 888-618-4422? Got it.

I finally remember it after, what, two years? At least. Is today the anniversary of our company? No, that's the 14th. Well, the 14th was the first episode. We technically launched before that, but I'm counting it. That's fair. You can disagree if you want.

I'm counting the first day as the 14th because that's the first episode of Circling Back. Well, what was the date that Dave registered Bunsen Burner Media LLC? I'm definitely not counting that. I'd have been today. Definitely not counting that. That's a great name. We're coming up on the two-year anniversary. Feels good. Also, go follow Circling Back Pod and Watch Media

on the Grom. Leave a review and five-star rating. Go check out youtube.com slash watch media. Bunch of new stuff on there. Randy put up a best of from the last year. It's a little nice little heartfelt video. Also, we're just a major initiative of watch media in 2021 is to do some more video content.

So go check it out. Subscribe. Enjoy. Leave some comments. We love the feedback. And also let's talk merch real quick. As you know, we launched a new shop in late November. As you've known, if you've bought something, there's been some fulfillment issues

that we'd like to apologize for. Unfortunately, due to a lot of circumstances that have been out of our control or kind of annoying circumstances, circumstances that we didn't take into account. There are a million different things that have happened between when we launched the store and today. Some of you have gotten your stuff. Some of you have gotten the shipping notifications and some of you have not even gotten a shipping notification yet.

We are sorry about this. There are a lot of things that have happened throughout switching our merch process to COVID delays to just general things that we never even took into account that caused us to find ourselves in this position. Don't order too much stuff. One of which being demand. Yeah, we also sold way more stuff than we originally anticipated and yeah we just want to apologize to everyone out there who might have not gotten their stuff in time to the people who have been you know whatever i i don't know no i got yeah no i understand because i would i put in an order at the end of november and i got it a couple days ago i was excited to see it um and yeah i mean dude i mean it's a it's a

tough time to it was an adventurous time to switch merch strategies like that, but we had to do it. Yeah, we experimented with the new service. Again, we're sorry. We're taking steps to make sure it doesn't happen again. Yes. Like we're letting you go, Dylan. You no longer work here.

I don't like that. Just like my least favorite bit that you have going. What? I'm not really going to fire you. I don't have that power. I know, but I just don't like it. Let Dorn go. Let Dorn go.

We are sorry, though. All right, we'll let Brett go. Fine. I will say this. We did learn a lot. Yes. We learned a lot. Live, laugh, learn is what I've always said.

Live, laugh, burn. Sorry. T-shirt. There's no video today. I don't know why I'm acting for the camera. Yeah, why are you acting for the camera, dude? I'm acting it out. We should probably just let him go, I think. Let him go.

I'll start once and burn her media. Will's the only one left. What's up? It's me. No, but yeah, we're going to get all the orders out. They will be out soon. That being said, we are taking measures to make sure that something like this doesn't happen again.

We're taking measures to get some cool new products. We're very excited about it, but just know that we understand that this is not an ideal situation, and we are going to make sure that this ideal situation does not last longer than it needs to. And so to everyone that's bared with us, we appreciate it. You guys, everyone that listens to this podcast, our number one strength as Washed Media is probably the diehard fans and the people that support us, the people that buy things from us, the people that just do everything we do in order to let us have a cool job and a cool career. And so we just hope that you guys stick along with us.

Yeah, I disagree a little bit. I think our number one strength is that Dylan has a collection of muscle milk milk in his kitchen it's called total war dude that is dylan has all the hand sanitizer one would need to survive uh have you filled your cabinets yet no i don't plan to okay there's so much space there's a lot of space i mean i would have to get a full china set i'm like i'm just not going to do that i plan to never purchase china my entire life yeah it doesn't it's expensive dude they have a lot of people that's why i just have like so much throwaway money i'm like yeah whatever let's fill this dumbass you don't have any yadro i'm sorry is that a crypto oh dylan okay

Dylan. Okay. Dude, doesn't have Yadro? I don't know what that is. It's clear, dude. If you're a Yadro,

what is Yadro? Don't worry about it, man. I have no clue what Yadro is. I'm sorry. Did they just make a word up? No, I don't think they did. Is it a recreational drug

that we don't know the price of? Is it a cryptocurrency? It's not, but speaking of that, I'm going to peep my wallet. Oh, fuck, it's up.

I caught some BTC this morning. That's the best time to buy is when it was up 8%. It dipped a little bit. That's why I bought it. You got to find the pullback and hop in. I'm already up, so maybe you go fuck yourself. What are the rest of your stonks looking like? Up as well, actually.

Really? It's all in Apple right now, though. Are you still on that DAL? No, I got out to it. Come on. I'm not doing airlines right now. There's vaccines, though. Huh? You flew on one. Yeah, I got out to it. Come on. I'm not doing airlines right now. There's vaccines, though. Huh?

You flew on one. Yeah, I did. Where'd you fly? Southwest. Full flight. Wanna get away. They're not doing the empty middle seat. Oh, that's...

Set next to parks. Can't see us because we're not on video today, but scooting over a little bit. Wanna get away. Let's talk about HIMS real quick. HIMS. Big HIMS fans over here. HIMS. It's a wellness brand for men. You've heard us talking about HIMS and how they're helping guys look their best. If you haven't yet,

it's time to see what they're all about. If you're not familiar, 66% of men start losing their hair by age 35. And once you've noticed thinning hair, it can be too late. So whether that hairline's slowly starting to move backwards, you've got a bald spot, just kind of making an appearance. The best way to prevent more hair loss is to do something about it while you still have some. So don't turn to these weird like snake pill solutions from gas stations or just do nothing. Turn to medicine and science

at 4hims.com, the one-stop shop for hair loss, skin care, and sexual wellness for men. It's time to write a new chapter, one in which you have hair. We have a preventative user in the building. His name's Brett Merriman. Hey, me. Or Brett Hairyman, as I like to call him. Ooh, wow. Because of his hair.

Yeah, I noticed a little bit of thinning when I was like 21. And I was looking for solutions. Guess what I found, Will? Hems, I think? Hems. The coif on this guy. Look at that. And we bet.

You would make the all-washed hair team if we had that. How many people are on that? Right now, just one, I think. Brandon's got pretty good hair. And Dylan. Eh. Eh. I used to have good hair.

I've been cutting my hair too short lately. I've got to let it grow. You went short, boy. Let it grow. Should we revisit the all-hair team from Grand X? Stop doing Frozen. Yeah. The photo. Dude, I don't even it grow. You went short boy. Let it grow. Should we revisit the all hair team from Grand X? Stop doing Frozen. Yeah. The photo.

Dude, I don't even like Frozen. Do you watch Frozen? You like Frozen? Fuck off, dude. Never seen it. Nah, I'm not a big Frozen guy. The songs absolutely go.

No, the songs go, but the movie itself I didn't love. Whatever. So check out him. Yeah. It was created by a guy who knows that some

men's health conversations are easier had online than in person, which I think we can all agree about. I like talking online to you guys more than in person. That's for sure. Even with the delay. All you have to do is it connects you with a licensed medical professional online, which could save you hours, completely confidential and discreet.

All you have to do is answer a few questions, and a medical professional will review. And if they determine it's right for you, they can prescribe you a medication to treat hair loss that is shipped directly to your door. You know when you're at the barber shop and they hand you the mirror to make sure the back looks good? If you have any anxiety about that, every time you go in, you're like, oh. This is a product for you. That's a tough scene. Well, I've got good news for you. Today, HIMS is giving you their best offer yet. If you're not happy with your results after 90 days,

HIMS will give you a full refund. And right now, our listeners can get their first visit absolutely free. Go to 4hims.com slash steam. That's 4hims.com slash steam. Prescription products require an online consultation with a healthcare provider who will determine if a prescription is appropriate. Restrictions do apply. See website for full details and important safety information. But remember, that's 4hims.com slash steam. Would you say that Brett has the MVQ, most valuable cloth? Maybe.

Maybe. I think so. I'm going to change my Twitter handle to MVQ and see where that goes. They try to make MVQ a thing on Too Much Dip Monday. It wasn't MVQAWF. It was something similar. A couple letters off. Oh, we're not doing that.

It seemed inappropriate. We're not doing that. Dylan, did you listen to Too Much Dip? I did not. You missed that one? Yeah, I missed it. Why didn't you listen to Too Much Dip, Dylan? Yeah.

I only had time for one podcast, really. Where were you? Weren't you on a plane? Yeah, I was on a plane. But he had a child. I didn't pay the $8 for the internet, though. Oh, you hear? Oh, never mind.

Breaking news. I'll tease it. Just wait, dude. Sheesh. Tell us about Colorado, dog. Yeah, dude, I went to Colorado, man. It was tight. I got to take Parks to real snow for the first time.

What was his initial reaction to snow? He just wanted to throw snowballs. Hell yeah. I was like, let's fucking go. How's his arm? Right when he got out of the car at the Denver airport, we went to go to the rental car place. I tried to pack him one, and it was like, you know the snow,

sometimes you just can't pack it if it's really loose. Yeah, I think I know a thing or two about making snowballs. Yeah, he's pretty obnoxious. He was like, know the snow sometimes you just can't pack it if it's like really loose you know oh yeah i think i know i think so uh yeah he was like he was like what's wrong are they like broken i was like no we just got to find some some packable snow are they broken he didn't really say that he's like what's wrong with the snow like we'll find some good snow don't worry the powder was too dope yeah it was just very powdery and uh so we got we got to breck finally and uh we i lit him up a couple times with a snowball he I let him pop me a couple times. We had an excellent time. The best day probably was sledding, honestly.

For some people, you were a liability on the hill. Yeah. Oh, my gosh. What about the people whose ACLs you fucking ripped open? You must ruin that guy's life. If y'all go to my Gromp at DeShivery. Add me on the group. Thank you.

I just posted a slideshow. And the last one is a video of me and Parks on the Sled together. Right after I stopped recording, two seconds after, a seven-year-old just slammed into my back. Oh, no. Just absolutely smoked me. A seven-year-old or a 70-year-old? Seven. Oh, okay.

And he starts crying. His dad runs up. I'm like, oh. Did you whip his ass? Yeah. Did you hover over him? No, no. I mean.

Protect his house. Because of, we kind of stopped high up on the, and so the kid was moving and we had stopped. That's why he slammed against me. It wasn't my fault. There's nothing I could have done about it. Dude, your back's just so big and wide. Yeah, I've been really hitting back day hard.

You know that, Dave. You see me in there. Sledding was awesome. One of the most painful injuries I've ever had was from hitting a tree on a sled. Like, sledding can fuck you up. Oh, yeah. And there's no one out there, like, keeping it safe, like, making sure people are – you know, it's just a free-for-all. It's laissez-faire.

And so it's easy to get smoked. Nice, Dave. Wow. I don't know if that plays – It does. Okay. Maybe. I don't think so. Let the markets do what they may, Dylan. Nice, dude. Wow. I don't know if that plays. It does. Okay. Maybe. I don't think so.

Let the markets do what they may, Dylan. It controls itself. But, yeah, easy to get smoked. You know what? I got smoked. Some little kids probably got smoked. Dude, I would have been pissed if I was the dude who you almost smoked. Well, first Parks almost smoked and then you.

But he was walking right into our lane. And you had your phone out and I saw you go by that close. And you're like, oh, look, dude. Like, the sick dude. Dude, stoke face. Yeah, stoke face. I would be like, dude, what's your problem? Yeah.

I don't know what you could have done. I'm not an expert sledder. You just got to keep your head up. You got to look uphill. You got to look for people coming down. How many fistfights break out on the sledding hill? Oh, yeah. There were a lot of folks on there, too sledding hill oh yeah it was I mean there were

a lot of folks on there too people flying around it was crazy Parks loved it though if Parks hit some other kid do the dads have to then fight like well that's how it is

our kids smoke each other you just can't hit a kid Mountain Justice it sounds like an ABC show yeah tune into Mountain Justice it's a Yellowstone knockoff

yeah just a ski area I'd be Justice. It's a Yellowstone knockoff. Yeah. Just a scary area. I'd be fine with that. Cops of Yellowstone. Oh. Yeah. Did you get any fits off?

You know I got fits off. You kind of tease coming back with a cowboy hat. Yeah. Yeah. There was one Western store in Breckenridge, and they didn't have a good cowboy hat selection. I needed to go to Kimo Sabe, you know, wherever you went. Oh, you got it right. Okay. If you want to borrow my hat next time like you can just ask yeah the closest one was a veil but I didn't go to veil why didn't you just go to veil okay so your dad was take the chopper to veil why didn't you sled to veil but I did get a dope

shacket um my first shack who are you excited about your jacket so they didn't have my size so I ordered one it first shacket. Are you excited about your shacket? So they didn't have my size, so I ordered one. It comes in today. I'm pretty excited about it. Anyway, the reason sledding was the best day is because Parks is not into skiing. Uh-oh. And I found that to be pretty devastating. He hates it so much that I took him to ski school, and he wouldn't even put the skis on.

Nice. He instead sat there crying and thought I had like left for the day because I dropped him off and walked away, but I was nearby to make sure he was in good hands. And he saw me. Like I called his name out and he was crying. He saw me and he like, it's the happiest I've ever seen him,

like rescued him from ski school. He hated it. God. That's surprising. Was it the boots? Was it cold? Like what's the- He had a root with the fur.

So that wasn't the problem. Actually, he did get a blister on his lower ankle from the boots, which was a factor. But I asked him, was that the reason why you didn't like it? He goes, not really. That was the only part of it. He just didn't like the whole scene, man. I think it was pretty intimidating. He'd never done it before.

The kids around him who were decently good at it, they were going down the hill a little bit. He told me he wanted to board. Yeah. I have no problem with him boarding. He told me he's all about the apres. He's like, dude, fuck this nerd shit. He's like, I'm trying to get faded. I'm trying to balance my quads.

He's like, give me some draft beers. They hit different at altitude. I'm going to try again. Try again in a year or two. They really do. Try again in a year or two, see if he's more into it. That's surprising. I really do.

Try to get in the air, too, see if he's more into it. That's surprising because, like, I mean, as much as you like to ski, you love hitting the slopes. Is this a cocaine joke? I'm talking about my 5-year-old son. No, I'm saying you, though. Yeah, almost 6. Almost 6.

Good call. He doesn't skateboard, right? He's still. No. I just got him on a bike for the first time. Get him on a board. Doesn't have to do crazy tricks. Get that down and then go snowboard

and you'll have like the posture down. I know it's different, but I mean, look, as a guy who's done snowboarding and skiing one time each in his lifetime,

I think I can speak on it. Okay. Get him like a snowboarding video game or something. Yeah. Yeah. I was crushed, man. Did you take him to the terrain park like y'all took me?

No. He wouldn't even put skis on. Did he like the gondola? We didn't ride the gondola. Oh. Yeah. He stayed at the bottom of the mountain. So I just called my sister.

She came and picked him up. He just went and shred. And went and skied for a little bit. You did the video on it. It looked like the same trail that we did the video on, it looked like the same trail that we did the video on. Oh, really? Yeah.

I was like kind of examining it. I was like, oh yeah, I think that's the one we did. Yeah, so I did Breck the first day and Keystone the second. Just two days of skiing. How far are those from each other? About a 25 minute drive.

Not bad. Okay, that's not bad. What kind of SUV were you ripping? We had a Dodge Durango. Oh. We had two vehicles. Dodge Durango. Dodge Durango.

Stop. Stop. Stop. I don't know the other words. I've been to Durango. I don't care, David. Like, I don't care. I boarded Purgatory down there.

How many establishments with the word blue in it did you hit? Just one. We hit Blue Bistro for dinner. I know. I wasn't going to bring it up, but since you brought it up, let's roast this, man. We did not hit Blue Moose, did not hit Blue Stag. Oh, my God. Oh, so COVID restrictions in Colorado, but specifically in Breckenridge, are nuts.

A lot of places you can't even walk inside. in Breckenridge are nuts. A lot of places you came and walk inside. If you're in town, you must have a mask on or else you can get ticketed. Apparently the handout ticket's pretty frequently there. Pretty liberally, am I right?

What? Full circle joke. I didn't even hear what you said. You gotta wear a mask. Dave liked it. I just like that he went for that. You gotta wear a mask. Dave liked it. You got to wear a mask on the mountain. Dave liked it. I just like that he went for that. Yeah.

You got to wear a mask when you're skiing, all that shit. That surprised me. That surprised me as well. When you posted a photo from the chairlift or something, you posted a video from the chairlift, and I was like, oh, they do have their masks on. Oh, yeah. When we were in Aspen, you had to wear a mask everywhere. I was actually very surprised that if you were just walking through town, you had to wear a mask at all times.

And it actually made me feel a lot safer. I was like, no, everyone's taking this very seriously in Colorado. In Austin, you leave a restaurant and it's just mask off. It's future style. Dude, fuck it. You know what I'm saying? Not there, man. Wow.

That song's going to have such a resurgence this summer. It is. Oh, yeah. It is. If you can buy stock in that song, you should. Do you think it's going to be the song of the summer, or do you think Wilmont still has that on lock? Ooh, hard to say.

Welcome to Wilmont. How many- A lot. A lot. How many times are you just walking through your place, and you just give a, welcome to Wilmont. Too many. Where'd you get a blue riff?

I ran the salmon back. It was so dope the first time I got it again. You were a big fan of that salmon. It was so good. It was really good the second time, got it again. You were a big fan of that salmon. It was so good. It was really good the second time, too. Was it salmon? It was salmon. You get there like garlic butter, too?

I remember they had that. No. Okay. I don't even remember what I got. A little limoncello after. I think I went steak. I feel like I went steak. I think I was sitting next to you, and I think I went big boy steak.

I think I went steak and regretted not getting the seafood. The salmon was awesome. Dylan was raving about the salmon. So was Lily, man. We both were. No, she was. I think she actually gave me a bite of hers.

Hard to say. Yeah, hard. You guys got any questions about my trip? Local beers? Yes. Breckenridge Brewery. Nice.

I bought their sampler pack from the store. The varietal? Yeah. Very good stuff. Did you go to a weed place? I bought like their sampler pack from the store The varietal Yeah Very good stuff Did you go to a weed place? I didn't actually You know

You didn't keister any weed back to Texas? No I probably would have just checked it in my luggage Come back to Texas I didn't That's okay It's illegal to smuggle drugs across state lines still and everyone knows that Tide lives like five minutes from me, so it's not a big deal. I can just hit him up.

Yeah, Trevor and Noah are still, they're just hooking me up constantly. Go support Small Business September, please. Trevor and Noah. I forgot about Trevor and Noah. That was one of the best, that was one of the best moments of the year last year. They're so weird.

Yeah. Yeah, go hit up Trevor and Noah in North Carolina. They got some good, good. Yeah. Successful trip. No one got hurt. Good. No drama. It was Yeah, go hit up Trevor in North Carolina. They got some good good. Yeah. Successful trip. No one got hurt. Good. No drama. It was fun, man. Did any, like, I don't know, superstar basketball players pass away

while on the trip? No, luckily no. No very famous people died while I was there that I know of. That's good. Yeah. Kanye Roberts. Oh, that was yesterday. R.I.P. Midge. Also, Marianne from Gilligan's Island. She might have passed away while you were there. I don't know if this is in poor taste or not.

You've never seen Gilligan's Island? No, I was obsessed with Gilligan's Island. I was going to say, that seems like a Will show. That's probably why I like Wilmont so much. Marianne at one point was my number one. She's hot. I was a simp for Marianne. Willigan's Island. Willigan's Island has legs. Also one. Whoa. She's hot. I was a simp for Marianne. Willigan's Island.

Willigan's Island has legs. Also could be a Wilmot's competitor. Ooh, starting a competitor with your restaurant. It closed. The Headless Parrot. Yeah. Headless Parrot had a tough run. Dude, they couldn't make it through the restrictions.

Yeah, all their marketing went to that one episode of Happy Hour Live. They need to hit up the Barstool Fund. Yeah. Shouts to them. Should Wilmont hit up the Barstool Fund? You don't need it. You're thriving. It's true.

I know, but these rum floaters are going to take it at some point. No, dude, don't leave it for other small businesses like Headless Parakeet or whatever. Is it weird that I actually have fears that if we ever did a pop-up or something, it would end up devastating the company because we'd have to give out so many rum floaters well you haven't had that thought but now that you bring it up yeah like i'm kind of scared that if we ever get to the point of actually opening a restaurant that like the rum noters are going to be an issue we're opening a restaurant at some point yeah if rum if our rum budget is is really putting that much of a strain on our company we need to reevaluate it's actually going to be a bar food trailer combotrailer combo. I don't want a whole brick-and-mortar restaurant situation.

Can it just be a pop-up? People are not going to have a dance floor? Like what? Or patio? We could put down some cardboard, breakdance. I said we're going to have a bar. Breakdancing isn't in the Olympics this year. I'm excited for that.

I don't know if there's a new sport introduced to the Olympics that I've been more excited about than breakdancing. They got rid of baseball, right? Good. I don't know. there's a new sport introduced to the Olympics that I've been more excited about than breakdancing. They got rid of baseball, right? Good. I don't know. Give me rollerblading. They did get rid of baseball. You know the bike people that go like the walls are literally tipped like this and they go around in an oval?

Give me rollerblading with that. What if they did beach hockey? Remember the Beach Hockey League? Oh, it was like roller hockey, but just... It was on ESPN2. It was the Beach Hockey League, and they had a giant regulation-size rink set up next to a beach, and behind the goals, it was like a ramp. So you could boost speed behind the goal

and then come in. It was a high-flying, fun... And you rollerbladed? Yeah. It was awesome. I can't believe you guys didn't watch this. It was so awesome. Speaking of, on South Lamar Boulevard, there's a Sonic.

And I drove by yesterday. There's a dude on rollerblades who was, what do they call it, Sonic hopping? What's the thing? Car hop. Car hop. He was a car hop on rollerblades. I guess they make another dollar an hour than people just on foot. They get more tips.

Wait, they actually get a bump in pay? Yeah, if you're on blades. You catch me just blading. You're right. I want to chop blades. Didn't Friend of the Pod Kayla do that at one point? Did she? My high school girlfriend was a car hop.

I'm almost positive Kayla was a car hop at one point and wore the blades. I don't remember that. But, no, everybody, most of the girls wore quads, the roller skates. Those are harder to skate on. I know, you got more tips. People liked it. The creepy old dudes who would go there. There was always creepy old dudes.

I would hear about these dudes all the time. They would go sit there for like an hour and just talk to all the gals. I'd pay $5 for a compilation video of the worst spills from Sonic employees. Oh, yeah. Just people slamming into the side of the car. There's like a Diet Coke goes all over the front seat. Yeah, it'd just be great. Dude, I would just be hockey stopping.

Dude, the sound of quads on like a quick stop on a roller rink floor is just a great sound. Roller rinks for some reason give me anxiety. Why? I think it's because the one that I grew up in was weird. So I just don't like it. Oh man,

fifth grade every Friday night I was at. Oh dude, when Gangsta's Paradise came on, everybody went out there. Dude, yes, same at ours. Everyone started mobbing

when that song came out. Really? Oh yeah. All the cool slash bad kids went on Friday night Redbird Skateland. And they all wore quads as we call them, roller skates. all the cool all the cool slash bad kids went on friday night redbird skate land and they all wore quads as we call them roller skates and i was playing hockey and rollerblade

i brought my rollerblades one friday night and i basically got laughed out of the rink bringing my and i i called my dad to come get me oh dude we all wore rollerblades to ours everybody all the cool kids like that were like probably already smoking cigs in fifth grade, they were all wearing the rental skates. It was not cool to bring your own skates. That's lame, dude.

The cool kids were making out in the corner and shit. It's not like you're bringing your full set to Topgolf. You're just bringing your blades. That feels like the comparison. Yeah, I was all excited. I had my,

whatever, my Bauer hockey skates. I had the cool urethane wheels. And I was like, all right, let's fucking go. You need to reassess your crew. Damn, dude. This wasn't my crew. I was trying to get into the cool crew, which was also, like, the Smoke Sigs crew.

And luckily, I didn't get into it. Were you a poser? No, I wasn't a poser. Dude. It makes you wonder. Dude, it makes you wonder. No, I don't think I'm. I wish Randy was here so we had video of the second Dave realized he might have been a poser.

He's a fucking poser, dude. It's not a poser scenario. No, I'm sorry, dude. What we just did is unfair. Calling someone a poser is like on the same level as calling someone like a creep. You just can't do it. You can't shake it. I apologize.

I had a friend who I skated with. His older brother was really, really good at like aggressive inline skating and he called us both. He called us poser boys.

Ooh, that's tough. Even his, he called his little brother poser boy. That's a tough scene. He was a poser boy. Yeah, that's, I'm sorry, Dave.

That's an insult too far. That's okay. One last little like cute nugget about the trip. Oh, give us some cute nugs. We have a fireplace in there, and you just turn on with a flip of a switch. Gas comes on, and it comes on. Parks loved it.

There was one morning he got up before everybody else, walked downstairs, turned the fire on, and just sat by it. Dude, hell yeah. So we got up. We were like, what are you doing, man? He's chilling. He's hanging out by the fire, pictures that's that's that that's that alone is worth it i know dude i was obsessed with the fireplace dude it was great man were your dms just a war zone when you posted the

photo of you and your long underwear next to the fire not really no like i was trying to act up there what was going on there you just You got some legs on you, dog. Nah. You're self-conscious about your legs. Like, I was about to DM you and be like, what's good? I've been hitting legs hard, but I don't think they look any different, really. Yeah, it was a cozy little scene. I just wanted to capture it, you know?

In my long underwear. You got some dope long johns, dude. Yeah, dude. Is there somebody in this room who thinks that legs are totally genetic and you can't do anything to them? Just tell him. I didn't say you can't do anything to them. Okay. You alluded to it.

People are absolutely limited by their genetics. I will never have big legs. Here we go. I'm not arguing. I didn't know if it was dangerous. Somebody here refused and got away. I thought it might have been Klein who was like. No, no, no. Klein thinks that if I worked really hard, I could have Mike Allstott legs, and I just can't.

It's just not possible for me. Let me put it this way. I've been pelotoning very regularly for almost a year now. And my form is not the form that you're supposed to have. I am very leg dominant when I'm pedaling. My legs have not changed visibly at all. They are stronger and they are harder. If I flex my leg, if I flex my quad, you can feel that it's stronger.

But in terms of size, there might be a 5% difference. I can get stronger. I can tone my muscle up and it can grow marginally. I'm never going to have big legs. And that's just because my genetics will not allow that to happen. You cannot convince me otherwise. I've been hitting legs hard lately. You just don't want to work hard bro i did squats yesterday actually the hard and they're just not going to get big that's just who i am and i'm okay with it i like my legs would you rather have like the most chicken legs of all time not of all time

but very chicken leg or killian murphy. Oh, that's mean. Probably chicken legs, honestly. He deserves to have bad legs based on how he looks otherwise. There's this, can't wear shorts ever. No, but he, dude, it's kind of convenient that he probably lives in the UK and he's, like, also hot. So, like, I'm not really feeling that bad for his legs. He's got some brutal. I forgot about his legs.

He's got some brutal legs. I don't want big-ass legs. I just don't. Whatever. I like my legs, man. his legs. He's got some brutal legs. I don't want big-ass legs. I just don't. Whatever. I like my legs, man. My legs are dope. Your legs are fine. Let's talk about Sun Basket real quick.

Sunny B. It's Sunny B season. If you're not getting food delivered directly to your door, what are you even doing? Getting dinner on the table quickly does not have to mean sacrificing nutrition and quality, you guys. I keep telling you that. Mm-hmm. You've got to stop microwaving your steaks. With Sun Basket, you can actually have it all every single day. It's 2021. You don't have to wear pants. You don't have to commute. And we're darned if you'd have to worry about eating healthy in your resolutions. No one cares about resolutions

right now. Make it as easy as possible on yourself. Sun Basket can help do that. Do you guys want it to be your healthiest year yet? Yeah. It already is. I'd love that. Really? Starting off pretty healthy? Very. Shouts to you.

Thank you. Well, Sun Basket's making it even easier with their fresh and ready meals that are just $8.99, so they're good to go for you and your body and your budget. Every Sun Basket meal is filled with only premium quality real food, including organic fresh produce, antibiotic and hormone-free meats, sustainably sourced seafood from suppliers they know and trust. Their chefs have won Michelin Awards and James Beard Awards. Think about that.

Dylan probably doesn't even know what a Michelin star is, dude. Yeah, I do, dude. You think it's like a type of tire. I mean, Michelin is a type of tire, but I do know the other one, too. Both can be true. You probably think James Beard is like some dude that was in your frat like two years before you. Why not take a night off and let them cook for you? They got delicious meals like butter chicken with basmati rife pilaf.

Butter chicken? Sign me up. I need to get that one. Beef chili with cheddar and Greek yogurt. Creamy mushroom penne with baby spinach and almonds. Sign me up. Dude, Dave can't stop talking about the dandan noodles that he got. Dude, how were the dandan noodles? I need to get

another shipment because those were good. Very good. We did some Greek tacos recently. They were very good as well. Do you have any reiki after? Rocky. Don't know. I might be saying it wrong. Do you have any refiki after? Those are all different. Either way,

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sunbasket.com slash STEAM. And enter promo code STEAM. You guys see this news coming out of American Airlines? Yeah. It's a sad development. It's rocking the world right now. American Airlines has officially banned emotional support animals. Oh, boy, Will.

So I'll take the heat here. People abuse the system. That's what happened, right? Yeah. I haven't read the article, but. No I'll take the heat here. People abuse the system. That's what happened, right? Yeah. I haven't read the article, but... No, that's definitely it. I mean, it says, American Airlines is banning emotional support animals

in a move that will force most owners to pay extra if they want their pets to travel with them. The airline said on Tuesday that it will allow animals in the cabin free of charge only if they are trained service dogs. The change takes effect Monday. So if you're going to travel to a pub, do it now. Do it now.

Let me see. Let me see what else it says. There was a little Schnauzer in line in front of us at security, and he had the little service dog vest on. I'm like, come on. Does Austin Airport have the docus? Well, if it has a service dog vest on, that's probably legit. That's a service dog. There's a difference. There's a severe difference. This it has a service dog vest on, that's probably legit. Yeah, it's a service dog.

There's a difference. There's a severe difference. This was, like, not the service kind of dog, though. It was, like, a wiener dog? It was a schnauzer. Oh, okay. So I'm like, what is this? It can still be serviceable.

In what way? I think they're fucking tight. They have dope beards. It just made me think that it was one of those, like, I got the paperwork, so let me through situations. It probably was. There are definitely people who buy, like, the jacket for their dog. Yeah, to make it look—to really sell it. They're not going to bother me if I do this.

The news is—it also notes that American Airlines will collect a pet fee ranging from $125 to several hundred dollars if you want to travel with your pet. So you can still bring your pet in the cabin, but you just can't do it for free anymore. Okay. Didn't the lady bring a peacock? The peacock? I think the peacock was the most egregious one I've ever seen. That is just unnecessary.

Emotional support peacock? Just gallivanting up and down the fuselage. Yeah, no one's doing that. It's kind of a dicey thing to tell someone that, like... I mean, people abuse the system without having an obligation. Like what if you're wrong by accusing someone of. Yeah like I feel like airlines are pretty, like you have to be a little hesitant there.

Like actually I have crippling anxiety. Yeah like, you just have to be careful. And this dog is essential to my survival. I will say we've done this before. Are other airlines going to follow suit? Probably. I think so. I think they'd be foolish not to. And to be honest, if I'm being completely honest, I don't think this has anything to do with the concept of emotional support animals.

I think this has everything to do with money. Yeah. In my experience of bringing Rosie on flights, which I've brought her on, I think, three different trips, every employee wants to pet your dog. Every employee wants to come see your dog and most flight attendants are very attentive and talk to you about your dog like most that would be what my move if i was a flight attendant and like i would just be hanging out the dog

i also don't know do like i don't think i've ever i've never experienced and this probably because i'm not in a realm where you would experience this, but I've never experienced anybody getting turned down before. It's like, nope, there's too many dogs on this flight. I think there's a money grab. Probably. They might have been losing money on all the puppuccinos they were making. That's true.

That's true. Well, I mean, I don't know which airline started it, but the whole charging for bags thing, like one airline did it, and the next thing you know, everyone except for Southwest was doing the same damn thing. Well, these airlines have to be dying right now, right? They're not doing change fees and stuff anymore? Don't worry about them. Yeah.

If there's one- Freaking get bailed out. Dude. Fuck. Bail us out. They'll take the money, dude. Get their stimulus. Okay.

I never flew with Randy. And I probably won't. I didn't have any desire to. Yeah, I don't think I'll ever fly with Stella. He's a very large dog, and his little white hair would be flying all around the cabin. And, you know, he already has anxiety over stuff. He probably wouldn't do well on a plane at all. We could page with him.

That's the move. Yeah. That's the good news. If you have the means, yeah. Yeah. Guess how much money a year they're estimated to bring in with these new pet fees. Ooh, it's in the milli. Oh, yeah.

It's in the tens of millis, right? It's in the tens of millis. Holy shit. Probably $25 million. $40 million. Any guesses, Dylan? $16 million. $59.6 million a year in pet fees, which that's why it leads me to believe that.

It's more than Watch Media brings in. By a hair. Yeah. As I run the numbers, just a little bit. Sheesh, man. This is just for American Airlines or for industry-wide? It just says airlines. I think the AP is anticipating that this becomes a much larger thing. Oh, you know, United has been like chomping at the bit.

That being said, honestly, I don't hate this from the standpoint of I don't have to feel guilty if I have to pay $125 to bring Rosie somewhere. True. Like it doesn't make me feel bad and I don't have to feel like an asshole anymore because every single time we did do it, I kind of felt like an asshole because of the connotation that went along with it. Okay. What if they had an airline that was solely for pets?

Couldn't do it. And it was just, you got on there, and it was just a free-for-all. It's like a dog park in the plane. You're just hanging out. Be a cool job. That would be a cool job. Like flight attendant on that plane. Yeah, I kind of suck.

They just bring them doggy treats and shit instead of peanuts. Peanut butter. If you ask me to make a list of the things that annoy me about airlines, I don't think emotional support animals, for me, even register in the top 25 things that annoy me about airlines. No, it's when people get up and clap when the plane lands. Dylan's a big player. Dude, what's with the homie?

What have you done? No, to be fair, there was a toddler sitting directly behind him. He was, like, interacting with the whole flight. And the toddler, like, I don't know. I don't even think it was because the plane landed. She was just, like, making sounds. And Parks was like, oh, the plane just landed. I guess it's time to clap.

So he just starts clapping. I'm like, I put my hand on his. I'm like, stop. Stop. Stop. Stop it. But it was pretty funny. Oh oh no oh i mean i already miss him what a kid man good dude we'll get him on skis you know when you uh you see like a dad

that is skiing with maybe like two or three kids and he's got just like several pairs of skis over his shoulder he's got boots he's got kids like complaining about being cold and feet hurting i i always felt bad like that poor bastard you know now i get it i only have one kid and it was still like a serious chore getting them ready to go ski yeah um my gosh like you know yeah you see that dad it's tough that dad he's not having to do it the morning of ski school is very stressful we got him out there finally after like you know a long time and then he goes dad i gotta pee it's like just piss yourself yeah i've pissed myself so i'm gonna walk in the lodge and all that shit i've never pissed myself skiing but i've gotten damn close i think you mentioned it i don't recall having to pee at all when i skied and that's a shock i made some made some yellow snow. Well, Dave, it's probably because we got

pretty drunk the night before and we were probably dehydrated as hell. But as soon as, Dave's like me, as soon as you get an IPA in us on the slopes, it's like, well, I gotta pee. I peed on a chairlift because I got, you know. I would have pissed myself. I feel like pissing yourself on a mountain is one of the more acceptable

places to piss yourself. Yeah. Sure. I think so. Go back to the ski house, toss your snow pants in the wash. Easy cleanup. And then the pro move is that after you put them in the dryer, you leave them in the dryer all night. And then before you put them on to go out skiing the next day, you just toss the dryer on spin cycle for a little bit. You're a big closing the dryer before leaving the house guy. Getting all cozy. Oh, don't you still do that like every day?

Yeah. I literally did it today. Yeah. It's a good move. It's a little chilly out. Whatever. Our last place we lived, our apartment, the washer-dryer was in the bathroom.

It was like bathroom, tub, vanity, washer-dryer stacked, and then a big closet. And I would do that too. It was great. Have your towel in there in the dryer, get out, pop it out it's the best feel it's it's just the best feeling i love it should we move on to what we really want to talk about is it time to

talk ufos dude it's time to talk ufos again anytime there's ufo news i just i get a little giddy inside anytime you see a headline that says UFO and unclassified, you've got to click through. UFO report set to be released as a result of the U.S. emergency relief bill. A law buried in the 5,600-page emergency relief bill requires U.S. intel agencies to deliver an unclassified report on UFOs. Dude. It's good this got worked in the relief bill. How does this happen? It doesn't. What is this relief bill good this guy worked in the relief bill. How does this... It doesn't.

What is this relief bill? I don't understand the relief bill at all. It's 5,600 pages. Oh, yeah. Who's reading it? I read it a couple times before I voted on it. I am being completely honest here. I don't think I've read 5,600 pages in my life.

It's like reading the whole Harry Potter series like four times. I got the audio book and listened to it. You could bury whatever you want in a document that big, right? Yeah, that's what they do. Do you know how many pages are in the Harry Potter entire series? How many? 28,000. 4,224 pages.

Oh, my God. So the relief bill is longer than the Harry Potter series. How many books is it? You should do that tweet. No one knows, dude. You can't even look it up. You need to find a time machine back to when they were voting on it and do that tweet, and you're going vi. Yeah.

It's like, dude, this is fucking longer than Harry Potter. 5,600 pages. Who wrote that? Their hand must be tired. Imagine doing that in the colonial days when they had to write bills. Didn't they have their honey and pecky? No, you did not type the bill up. I can tell you that.

Why is this in a relief bill? Just like emotional relief for people? Yeah, we need some relief. Don't us a bone? Like, here, read about aliens for a little while. This reeks of limited hangout, I'll say it. What does that mean? Is that like a kickback that gets cut short?

No. I kind of like that,? Is that like a kickback that gets cut short? No. I kind of like that, though. That's a good – It's basically the concept of releasing a little bit of info while not – so it's like, okay, the veil of secrecy or whatever. People know this is a real thing. So you release a little bit of info and people are like, oh, wow, they're giving us a story and kind of withholding the key details.

So they give you a little bit to placate you. Give us a taste. Yeah, classic CIA technique. So this says, buried within the bill's 5,600 pages were a number of laws with little to do with coronavirus pandemic, including one requiring the U.S. Intelligence Services to submit an unclassified report on UFOs to the Senate Intelligence Committee within 180 days. So within six months, we're going to get this. I mean, I'm in. So we're doing a fight companion for whenever they release this stuff on Twitch.

We're going to go line by line. It says the report must include, quote, a detailed analysis of unidentified aerial phenomena, aerial phenomena, data and intelligence reporting collected or held by almost all of the country's intelligence agencies. It also must include identification of any incidents or patterns that indicate a potential adversary may have achieved breakthrough aerospace capabilities that could put the United States strategic or conventional forces at risk. This sounds so dope. We're getting it. They're giving us information about like their their crafts right like their their spaceships their ufos whatever

do we know what we know about the actual aliens themselves that's what i want to get they're not going to give you that we're not going to but why they're going to just be like yeah there's some this is what they've already done it's like yeah we've seen some stuff that has capabilities that defy you know know, any technology known to man. And they're going to, you know, they started it with the naval videos they released a couple years ago. Didn't we do that? We did that story here. Yeah.

But, yeah, they're not going to tell you, like, it's somebody from, like, I don't know, the Zeta aliens or whatever. But we know about that shit. I mean, we as in the government knows about that shit. Some people say that there's members who have infiltrated our government. I know. I'm not one of those people. They're little guys. Aliens.

Didn't we talk about that Brett has alien vibes? I don't think I have alien vibes. No, you have alien vibes. Are you an alien? Like, the fact that we didn't see your legs for like over a over a year put out major, like, what's up with the legs? Yeah, it's just a human. So it wasn't just, like, the leg insecurity. It was the alien vibes.

Like, I was kind of worried that you had, like, green skin on your legs. You don't have leg insecurity, do you? Uh, yeah. Oh, definitely. They're too white. Like, way too white. That's because you wear pants, like, all the time. Yeah, you don't wear shoes.

You've got to give shape to them. The shape's fine. It's more about the color. Dude, let's see those legs. Let's see them aliens. I love that this article about it, which is a very official article, embeds a video of Tom DeLonge

from Blink-182 talking about it. I love that. From Blink-183? Good for him. Thank you, Tom. No one's benefited from the UFO movement more than Tom DeLonge. They've embraced him. He loves aliens, man. Still one's benefited from the UFO movement more than Tom DeLonge. They've embraced him.

He loves aliens, man. Still one of the worst Joe Rogan listens you'll ever hear. Oh, man, I can't tell you anything, man. All-time bad guest. No, I wish I could tell you, but I can't, dude. There's bigger forces at work. He sounded like a complete—you're just like, dude, no one's taking you seriously. Yeah, when you become like the alien trutheruther guy you've taken a step too far and

people just don't take you seriously like i believe in stuff like this but i just you know well dude it's not even that he couldn't articulate anything he wasn't he just died he just not i don't think he's the most he's not the guy you want as your face guy for uh if you're a ufo guy you don't want like tom being like the torchbearer what you you don't... But like if this... Any reason that you don't want Tom DeLonge as your face of the UFO movement, any reason that you need can be found in the skits of their live album.

Yeah. The Mark, Tom, and Travis show. Go watch one of their live shows on YouTube. The banter in between songs is some of the most... First of all, a lot of it's not good. And a lot of it is just of the most first of all a lot of it's not good and a lot of it is just like the most juvenile what you didn't like the you don't like the parts where they bring in satan to talk hey kids that's welcome it's suck i love how you told me after we talked about how good how

hard that album went how it's finally on spotify i love that you were like yeah i put it on at my parents pool and uh the skits kind of took everyone out of it. Yeah, I didn't anticipate the skits. The skits always get you. And you can't skip them either. At the end of the song, or they're like in the beginnings and ends of the songs. No, you can't skip them. At this point, are you in the minority

if you don't think that, you know, beings from another world have visited the Earth in some capacity. I feel like, yeah, you probably are, right? If you're not horny for aliens, you're in the minority.

I mean, we've seen enough evidence where it's like, okay, if that's not alien, who has the anti-gravity machine? Who's doing the dope, who's got the, you know, the physics-defying tech? We don't have it. When we were kids like it was just like ufos weren't even like discussed at like a greater greater length

and now like yeah it's in the news all the time of that we're getting like this is this is getting closer man the dream area 51 was like locked that that secret was like one of the biggest secrets of all time and now it's just like yeah you Google Earth it, and you can see what's going on there. Yeah. Yeah, but we don't know what's... We don't exactly know what's going on inside. What's inside. You can see, but you can see, like, runways and stuff.

The runways are, like, 40,000 feet long. You mean just, you know, weapons testing? Yeah, it could be, yeah, nuclear testing and shit. Yeah, it may... Fuck, I'm an alien guy, aren't I? I think we are alien guy. As long as we're in it together. Yeah, I'm alien guy, aren't I? I think we are alien guy. As long as we're in it together. Yeah, I'm there with it.

Just don't spend a lot of time trying to convince people. No, dude. You don't want to be the guy when you're out on a couple's date with your wife's friend from work. And you're talking to the husband. You're like, man, have you seen this? Have you ever heard of S4? It's like Area 51. Yeah, you can't be that guy.

It's like, how much time you got, dude? DeLong doesn't care, though. He's just all in. No, DeLong is all in. That is one thing I respect about him. He pissed away being in one of the most popular rock bands of our generation in order to dedicate his life to finding aliens. No one's doing that. I like that Dylan knows more about his alien hunting catalog than his musical catalog.

Well, his music's absolute garbage, so it makes sense. Whatever. Dude, you can't do that on this podcast. It is so bad. You can't. You can't listen to Aliens Exist one time.

It is so bad. Did you hear about the Harvard scientist who wrote a book that's published this month called Extraterrestrial, the First Sign of

Intelligent Life Beyond Earth? I did see that. Avi Loeb said, do you remember the Oumuamua object that flew by the sun at 196,000 miles an hour three years ago?

How many miles an hour? 196,000. Dude, what if that drove down my street? I'm outside and like, hey, kids, aliens, there's a park right there. Dave's just going full Roger Federer on him. Yeah, this dude wrote a whole book on it saying that it was the first sign of it was like a originally classified as a comet but it

wasn't doing anything that comets do wasn't like didn't have a tail stuff like that you know the CIA would say about that? They'd say, what you hear is all hearsay. That's a Blink-182 lyric, Dylan. Hey, Dorn, there's something in the back room. How do you listen to that?

It's fucking excellent. I can't. I just can't comprehend. You would really hate the Cheshire Cat album. I can't comprehend how that entertains people. I mean, don't get me wrong.

Aliens Exist is not making my greatest hits of Blink-182 songs. I love that song. You can't disrespect others. It's the whole genre for me. I don't mean to pick on Blink-183 specifically. It's just the whole genre. It's weird. Dude, they transcend. They transcend.

Hope it's not the creatures from above. There's a song to his mom about there's a fucking alien in the back room. Can you imagine? What's that about? There's not. Who let the alien in the back room. Can you imagine? What's that about? There's not. Who let the alien in the back room? Come on. Get it out.

Gotta go. Said nobody's sleeping over tonight. Mm-mm. Aliens are here. He popped off the screen and snuck the alien in. Did you ever do that as a kid? Yeah. For sure.

What if one of your Red Dirt guys just started singing about aliens? I don't mind you singing about aliens. Okay. It's just the music's just really bad. You just don't want it to be like bar chords and like very fast paced. Yeah. Three of them. Power chords.

And the way they sing. They all try to sound the same. Do like an impression of it. I can't. What do you mean? Yeah. It's just like, what? Dylan would really hate Newfound Glory.

Ugh. Like, that would be the one. Like, that would be, if I were ever to like, to kidnap Dylan and like torture him, it would be Newfound Glory. Oh, you know how like people, like when they're, I mean, you guys probably might have had this happen to you. Like when you're pledging a fraternity and they, like for Hell Week, they'll just make you sleep in the same room all together like in like a stairwell and they just play a song on repeat.

Like your worst, the worst thing we could do for Dylan is play just a pop punk playlist. Simple plan. Is Newfound Glory like the most pop punky of the pop punk bands? The guy just has an

especially whiny voice. It's terrible. It's not good. It's terrible. It makes me sad that I used to like them. Me liking them was just me trying

to get more into the genre and not realizing that like that wasn't the direction I should be going. You were too far. Like I should have been going to like the more like not pop stuff.

Yeah. I was in a bad place. I was probably striking out with chicks like sophomore year. Oh, I was listening to like I was listening to Blink-182 songs

and like beating myself up to the lyrics about like not getting girls. It was just like, oh man, I'm so this guyink-182 songs and beating myself up to the lyrics about not getting girls. It was just like, oh man, I'm so this guy right now. Oh my gosh. It's so embarrassing to think about those moments, like songs that you related to. Man, this is totally me. It's like, no, dude, this is like a Korn song where he's just screaming into the mic. Yeah, and also they were like 24 when they wrote this stuff about high school.

And now they're like 40 singing about this stuff. I know. Yeah, but they're also pulling in millions and millions of dollars. Yeah, they're getting the bag. I'd be doing it. Let's do this weekend in fun. It's been a while. Presented by Roback. Presented by Roback,

baby. That's been a mess. I loved opening the door today, coming in the office and seeing a little gift. Oh, they dropped the bag for us. We got a nice little package from Roback. We're pretty happy about it. for us. We got a nice little package from Roback. We're pretty happy about it. Everyone knows that Stella 20 gets you 20% off Roback. They just dropped some performance hoodies.

They're awesome. Talk about them. They're dope. I love mine. It's the hoodie I wear when I want to perform. I'm wearing it tomorrow. It's the Q-Zip of hoodies. Wow.

That doesn't... Okay, I see what you're saying. You know what I'm saying? You know what I'm saying? It's not a quarter zip to be clear. It's lightweight. Do you know what they're called? Do you know what these are called?

One of them's called the snipe. Oh. Wheel snipe. Then the splash. Then the post game. Dude, give me the post game. I think you literally own the post game.

It's a gray one? No, I got a blue. Dude, when I dunk that meatball. Oh, you got the splash, baby. Let's go. You toss the rock to me or the giant meatball into the post, and I'm just back in Dillon Town. And one.

I will swat your shit five rows deep. I'm running back up the court looking at the ref like, you know, slapping my wrist. I'm going to swat your shit, and then I'm going to steal your girl out to the game. Whoa. Okay. His pregnant wife? Yes, his pregnant wife. She's out to the game. Whoa. Okay. His pregnant wife? Yes, his pregnant wife.

She's coming home with me. Okay. She's going to have a beer on Dylan's patio. I'm going to steal your son. That's kidnapping, dog. Good. So is the wife. What is it when you steal a pregnant person?

She's going to come willingly. No, I don't like that. I'm sorry. That got weird. I wasn't going to go there. Thank you, Roback. Damn. Sponsoring said segment here. Go to Roback.com. Check everything weird. I wasn't going to go there. Thank you, Roback. Damn. Sponsoring said segment here.

Go to roback.com. Check everything out. We love it all. I can't wait to dip into the care package we got out in the lobby right now. Stella 20 for 20% off everything. Dylan, what are you getting into this weekend? Wow. Thank you for asking, Will.

Whose pregnant wife are you kidnapping? I have nothing going on Friday. Well, I have nothing going on the entire weekend, actually. I have Parks going on Friday Well I have nothing going on The entire weekend actually I have Parks Friday Saturday I'm looking forward to that Of course

Not on Sunday I know you guys Are probably going to Play some golf If you want to link Afterward For maybe a slice of pizza I'll probably have to

Hit the house Yeah dude I got stuff A craft seasonal Beer I will be in for that Right right What season is it I guess winter It's winter Obviously winter But like Yeah, dude. I got stuff. A craft seasonal beer. I would be in for that. Right, right, right. What season is it?

I guess winter. It's winter. Winter White House. Obviously winter. Never mind. January, Brett. I hate you. Brett doesn't know how the seasons work.

That's it. I got nothing. We're together down here. 65 degrees today. I hate this place. I'm like cold and sweating right now. I never know what I'm doing. This sucks.

Obviously, I just got back from vacation. I'm probably going to take it kind of easy. Yeah, dude. Let's be nice. Yeah, we should. I'm trying to get my post, like, I'm trying to get in shape again. Me too. Me too.

You know what I mean? Yeah, you should. I gained a lot of weight over the holidays. I'm trying to lean up. I'm actually pretty light right now. It's bulking season still, though. Not for me. Are you just dropping bonds on bulking? I gained weight over the holidays, and I've had the highest'm actually pretty light right now it's bulking season still though not for me are you just dropping i can't wait over the holidays and i've had the i've had the highest peloton numbers that i've ever had like do i need to start putting on mass

it's like burger dude you're just burning you got that mess you're putting out more cajoles yeah so you're so this weekend you're working out all right it's part of my uh initiative forward, you know, to get the bod back in peak form. You are looking kind of tiny right now. Get the bod back in peak form. Yeah. Anyway.

Go ahead, Brett. You trying to get hot for the spring? Yes, yeah, for sure. Spring break's coming up. I've got to get hot for the spring? Yes, yeah, for sure. Spring break's coming up. I've got to get pool ready. Oh, man. I'm golfing on Friday. I think Intern Kline's coming down.

That's big for the squad. Yeah. Then we'll do a dinner after. I wonder where. I couldn't imagine everybody in Austin knows where we'll be at that point. Then the rest of the weekend, I'm laying low. Probably will try to continue the swing journey, which I'm going to do. Did you DM that guy back?

I have three different PGA professionals in my DMs right now wanting my business. So I don't know how I'm going to divvy that up. Send him a video. Say, look, all right, now give me your best breakdown of this swing. The problem is I think I know what I'm doing wrong. I just can't fix it. The PDF didn't do it for you? Yeah.

You know the PDF is 800? You know Dylan missed that. I bought a PDF. The stimulus bill is 800 of your PDFs. You bought a PDF? On how to fix my swing. In the relief. You've got to think that solves everything. It's bill is 800 of your PDFs. You bought a PDF? On how to fix my swing. Buried in the relief. You've got to think that solves everything.

It's an over-the-top guide. And there's links to YouTube videos. And there's drills. It's a picture. Did you print it out? No. Oh, I'm not having fun playing golf anymore, by the way. If you print it out, you definitely don't have enough toner or something.

It's going to come out with lines all through it and shit. I'm not enjoying golf at the moment. I know. I'll send you this Word doc I've got. I've played with you. Yeah, I've been playing really bad and it's not fun. So I'm going to take a little break from the course. Playing less will definitely help your game.

I'm not trying to. You know what? It hurts my back too. It's just a whole deal. I'll send you my PDF when I'm done with it. You need to get your bod back, as you said. I need to get my bod back. Maybe if you weren't just taking out people's ankles on the sledding hill in Breckenridge,

your back wouldn't hurt so bad. Why don't you do like yoga? It would go right into my path, dude? You want to do yoga? I do. I kind of do, yeah. I do, but the concept of doing hot yoga in pandemic, even though I think they're limiting class size,

it still seems like a super spreader event. Why don't you just do room temp yoga? Because hot yoga is tight. Imagine doing something and not doing it the hot way. Is that how most people do it? Hot yoga? I don't know. I've never done it.

Is it surprising I've never done yoga? Didn't you have a yoga journey? You had an Instagram account devoted to your journey. Well, I've done my own yoga, but I've never done a yoga class. Is it just a sweat fest in those things? Yes. Dude, I'm the sweatiest guy in every yoga class I've ever been in. That's disgusting.

And I did one with Ross, and Ross doesn't sweat a lick. He is like anti-sweater, and I'm over here just disgusting. Do you think about it the entire class? No, you get used to it. I pop top. I'll say it. Really? In class?

Flax. He's wearing a shirt. For me, it's pointless. He's glistening from the sweat. Yeah, I mean, I might even start going to Dave's class. They asked me to move. Eye candy, too. Can I get right behind you? No, they asked me to move to the back because I was from the sweat. Yeah, I mean, I might need to start going to Dave's class. They asked me to move. Eye candy, too. Can I get right behind you?

No, they asked me to move to the back because, like, I was at the front and I was taking away all the teachers. The chicks were just fainting? Yeah.

Sexy can I? Damn, dude. Your boys over there are just using the block. You can't get in all the poses. Oh, I'd have to use the block. Real ones know about the block. Yeah, I've never done it.

I'd have to be a block boy. Yeah, definitely. What. Yeah, I've never done it. I'd have to be a block boy. Yeah, definitely. What are you doing this weekend, though? I'm also playing golf. I'm looking forward to it. Getting some good rain out there. It's going to be nice and green. That night, while Dylan's meeting y'all at dinner,

Randy and I are going to go kidnap Parks and Stella. Human or dog? Dog. Human might be a good person to kidnap. He can bike pretty fast he talks too much yeah he is pretty loud he is pretty loud you talk too much he'd be asking you a bunch of questions about like so like like are we gonna we're gonna tie him up we're gonna duct tape his mouth like what are we doing he'd do a bit yeah he'd be like can I video this like no

dude fucking chill he's like I'm gonna twitch it no he'd be like in the back of the like the better your Ford F-250 just like with his phone out like, dude, we got parks. Dude, this is not how you kidnap somebody. Yeah, he would be a bad person to have on your kidnap squad. Like and subscribe. All right, we just got to Dave's house. And then he would turn it into artwork for the office.

Uh-huh. Yep. Yeah, I got nothing outside of playing golf, which I have not run by my wife yet. Yeah. But I think I'm in. I'm in a great position on Friday afternoon. Sally's working late that night until like 11, so I just got a free afternoon and night. So you know your boy's going to be out there swinging.

Unfortunately, I get to follow up a nice day of golf and maybe some tacos with the boys. I get to follow that up with cleaning up my closet. A major initiative in the DeFreeze family this year is going to be getting rid of a bunch of shit. I need a good donation box, by the way. If you find one, let me know. Because I have a thing ready to go. I'll donate something in your box.

Okay. Dude, that's disgusting. Jeez, man. My goal is to clear out more than half of my stuff out of my closet. Do you think that's possible? No. No. You're too attached.

I might have to send you some stuff from the hat collection. Send me some hats. I'm going to send some hats. I might just bring all the hats into the office. We could do a hat draft. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. We could get content.

That's a video we can have Randy do, hat draft. I think I need to bring in all the hats because the hats are taking up a lot of space. You guys have those shirts in your closet that you just can't get rid of. Yes. You know you will never wear again the rest of your life. 100%. I have like a hundred of those. I have a number of button downs that at the time were expensive that now fit like parachutes.

And I'm like, I don't want to throw that away. It's a malar. I spent 80 bucks on this polo like 12 years ago. I can't get rid of it because it costs 80 bucks. But you're never going to wear it again. Well, my concern is like what if I just derail again and I put on the weight that I lost in quarantine, and then all of a sudden I need these bigger clothes? No, see, that's negative motivation.

Demotivation. So you think I should get rid of it? I might just go buy small everything. Whoa. Just get tiny. Damn. Don't, dude. Small is too small.

You don't want to be a small boy. I'm a medium boy. I'm a certified medium boy these days. It's a perfect spot to live in. Medium was a really good skate brand back in the day. Medium? Medium. Rollerblade.

This sounds relatively familiar. They had a really cool logo. It was one of my favorite sweatshirts I ever owned. Huge. There's something in the back room. I hope it's not the creatures from above. Please stop. It's trash, dude.

The New Found Glory song about my friends over you. That song sucked. Dave, I love that song. Oh, my God. You're so whiny. Do you want the first lines of that song? Yes. I'm drunk off your kiss for another night in a row.

I'm drunk off your kiss. This is becoming too routine for me. But I did not mean to lead you on. Dylan's picked up his phone. He is checking out. I'm done with y'all. Hold on. How did the first line go?

I'm drunk off your kiss. Yes. Oh, my God, dude. I'm drunk off a kiss. That just took me back to my blue Sony CD player that I would just sit at my desk in my room and just draw and listen to Newfound Glory just cry. I'll listen to Snoop and Bone Thugs i did not shout to dre by the way shouts to dre nothing but prayers for dre right now prayers up it looks like he's gonna pull through yeah i think he's going home today that would be

a unbelievable loss for 2021 you know what i'm kind of bummed we didn't do today you guys see that that thing that was trending yesterday that I think... Mannequin Challenge. No, it wasn't the Mannequin Challenge. We can still do one of those. It was like your favorite rapper. Most overrated rapper. I kind of wish we would have done that.

Yeah. I like it. Table it. Maybe we'll do it for voicemails. Eminem, most overrated. Please. Some people were putting him in the goat slot. A lot of people were putting Kanye in the GOAT slot. I hate his style so much. A lot of people were putting Kanye in the GOAT spot, which I thought was a terrible call. Terrible call. I think single Kanye might have some heat for us.

Everybody knows Paul Wall's a GOAT. Post it up like a mailbox. Dude's sitting sideways, too, man. Elbows poking out. You don't sit sideways. Dude, how sick was it when the OU team did the Malcolm Jenkins rap? Malcolm Kelly. Malcolm Kelly.

You love that video so much. I love that video so much. And when I saw the team doing it, I was like, dude, if the Jung family knew how excited I was when the entire OU team was doing that, they would disown me. Are you saying they ran it back? Yeah. Oh, I missed this. After their bowl win, they were all on this giant podium thing where you celebrate, and they were all just singing the rap.

You have to see it. Dude, were they killing a cough? Yeah. Cody? Oh, yeah. That's the best part. Holla at the stoops. Brett, you got any breaking news for us?

Well, as a matter of fact, I do. Thank you for asking. Dylan, we'll choose your adventure here. Do you want to go plain Wi-Fi, celebrities, or Lakeway Real Estate? Lakeway Real Estate. I'll be buying out there soon. Dylan, over the course of the pandemic, Lakeway Real Estate houses and properties have increased in value

by on average of 8%. What are we going to do to tank this market? So if you're going to get in, we could bear hug Tesla and move their headquarters somewhere else. So I used to own a house in Lakeway. I sold it, I don't know, four years ago. But I still get, I'm signing up, four years ago. But I still get...

I'm signing up for this service. It gives me monthly updates on the home's value. It's tough to look at. I did make some money off the house, but it just keeps going up. Don't look at that. Yeah, it's probably unsubscribe. Hit that unsubscribe button.

Anyway. Yeah, let's go buy out there. Dave, you ready? Nope. Okay. Where are you thinking? Lakeway? That sucks. I'm probably going to do Eastside. That's very far from me. Yeah, dang it. That's going to stink. Were you like Lake Travis, Lakeway?

You were like... What's the other one up there? Lago Vista? I was Lakeway. The heart of Lakeway. Lago's north, right? I was more thinking high school. Like, were you late

Travis High School? Yeah, right by the high school. Oh, that's... Lake Travis High School is in the heart of Lakeway. Right. Great point. Yeah, Lago means Lake, Dave.

Sorry. Will, you were wondering about playing Wi-Fi, weren't you? Yeah, I'm a big playing Wi-Fi guy. Delta is laying the groundwork for free in-flight Wi-Fi.

That's why Delta's the GOAT. Yes. That is why Delta is the GOAT. Get back on their stonk, I think. Each plane... Free Wi-Fi might tank it. In a news release Tuesday morning, Delta detailed plans to shift away from GOGO in-flight to their rival Viasat. Well, good.

Anything but GOGO. GOGO stinks. If I see Go-Go on like, if I log in on their stuff and I see Go-Go, I immediately know that the next five minutes of my life are going to be frustrating as hell. Yes. Yes. And expensive. And it's like $34 for like a full flight of Wi-Fi.

I'm like, what the fuck? Yeah. I'm going to pay $24.99 for a two and a half hour flight. Yeah. Yeah. It's crazy. Southwest is eight. Fair. Still. I'm like, what the fuck? Yeah, I'm going to pay $24.99 for a two and a half hour flight. Yeah. Yeah. It's crazy. Southwest is eight. Fair.

Still. I'm trash. I have Sally's parents' A-list login just saved on my phone, so I just steal that every time. Must be nice. I don't even think they know. Bad boy shit. The tweets are beginning as soon as this week, and will continue into the summer, which pretty much means we're getting free Wi-Fi here.

Let's go. They'll work it in. We'll pay for it on the back end. That's true. Service fees. We're paying for it either way. Yeah. Dave, that's why we have you.

I hate being a cynic, but hey, man, I just tell it like it is. True, man. You can't trust these corporations. It's me. Tell it like it is, guy. You know me. I just tell it like it is, guy. Yep, you know me. I just tell it like it is. Nothing but the truth.

I love Dave being tell it like it is guy. I kind of love tell it like it is guy. Just saying. Everybody's afraid to say it, but I'll say it. Dude, that's what I like about you. You're never afraid to say it. Hey, everybody wants to be PC these days, not me. He just tells it like it is uh anyway i'm just did you have any more yeah there's kim and tanya broke up we know

so that well maybe is that official no i don't fucking know this is uh her third divorce if it happens chris humphries she got married super young dude former maverick great always forget she was married to chris humphries you got married like super young. Dude, former Maverick great. Always forget she was married to Chris Humphries. She got married super young. She likes to not bring it up. But Chris Humphries was her second marriage. At least. I think this is her third.

Fourth marriage, you? You? Would you marry Kim K? Would you marry Kim K? DM Kim K right now. I will absolutely not marry Kim K. Why? Hey, Dylan, dude, shoot your shot.

Dude. Not with Kim Kardashian. You know what they say. I hated that. It goes down in the DMs. Oh. Dude, Netflix and chill with Kim. Yeah, probably won't.

You got to have like a FaceTime date. If we go to Nobu in West Hollywood and you bump into Kim, I feel like you could hold your own. You're not going to bump into her. Let me get my single body back and then I'll slide in. Oh, she has kids too? I don't think she cares about body. Kanye's got a low-key trash body. The difference in height between Chris Humphries and Kanye West is like a foot and a half.

He's a tiny man. I don't know why. I really want our listeners to come out and be like, dude, fucking Brett, dude. He doesn't know anything about geography. There's no fucking Nobu in West Hollywood. There's got to be a Nobu. Where's the Nobu in— There's got to be one in West Hollywood.

There's definitely one in Malibu. I think it's like V Nobu. I don't make enough money for Kim Kardashian. She's not interested in Malibu. I think it's like V-Nobu. I don't make enough money for Kim Kardashian. You know, she's not interested in a broke boy like me. Kanye was, he wasn't as rich as he was before

he married her. It would be really good for the company if you married Kim Kardashian. This would be great for the watch media, that's true. Okay,

I'll shoot myself. How annoying would it be for you to have to fly from Calabasas to Austin like every day to record? Yeah. We could just set up a studio and we'll make it work.

Like a Hype House. Schweppe. Oh. How annoyed would a studio and we'll make it work. Like a Hype House. Swipe House. How annoyed would Kim be if we were just always at the Swipe House? I wouldn't want the baggage that comes with them. Dude, I would ask her to just retweet our links a couple times, see what happens. Yeah, hey Kim, can I get a link in bio today, please? Her Instagram with her 100 million followers, whatever it is. Sick.

What do they charge for one slide? $250,000. Serious? That's so stupid. Dude, it would be really funny to raise $250,000 and then just have one of our podcasts have her post it and just see what happens. That would work so well.

She has 198 million followers. Oh, my God. These guys are so funny. They talk about nothing. Did you see what Cristiano Ronaldo hit? No. Let me see. He is the first person to ever hit.

One sec. I should have had this pulled up. He's the first person to ever hit 250 million followers. Kylie has more than Kim. Grow freaking goat status. Kylie's got 208, man. Be careful, Dave. What?

No one gets more mad about goat takes than soccer Twitter. Oh, is it tattoo? Who's the goat? Either Messi or Ronaldo. Salah? How do you want to look at it? Salah, please. Or Saleh.

He's a coach, right? Saleh? Saleh. No, Saleh, he's a winger for your hometown club, Bayern Munich. Oh, yeah. He's been good for us. Not as good as I'd like him to be, but he's been close. Man, if Dylan didn't check out during Blink-182 talk,

I think soccer talk's going to be the bullet. Dylan's over there looking up a cleanse or some shit. No, he's on Zillow. I just saw him. He just said, how to bulk. Typing Calabasas, Zillow. Do a cleanse. Try to saw him. He just said, how to bulk. Typing Calabasas. Calabasas. Zillow.

Do a cleanse. Try to get a studio apartment over there. What's the Drake lyric? Oh, Drake and Kim are going to get together. Oh, hell yeah. Music for days. No. I think Kanye's catalog is going to improve when he's not with Kim.

I think we might get Heater Kanye back. It can't get worse than what it's currently been. I think we're going to get some Heater back. Heater's back. Recently been, I should say. Yeah, I hope he gets – this is going to sound bad. I hope he gets less religious. I hope his music gets less religious.

That's what I'm saying. Him, he just – I know. You don't like the gospel movement? I like it, but he does not – I like the beats and stuff, but he's not on God flow. Yeah. He's on that God tear flow. I want him rapping about bleached assholes, Dylan. He's done that, yeah.

And fitty pops. Did you hear KJ accidentally drank some bleach? Literally. Is he okay? Yeah, he's alive and well. How did he do that? It was in a water bottle, and it was was diluted and he was doing some work and he grabbed it to drink it. He didn't actually swallow it.

Okay. And that's worse than like the vodka bottle back in the day. Like when you, like people would bring like the water bottle of vodka to parties and shit and then you'd wake up in the morning. Or how about me at the movies and I took a sip of Brandon King's Dipspit. Not knowing. How about me when I was 12

and I had a Red Bull on the side of where we were playing flag football and somebody put their cigarette in it. Okay. I took a sip of it.

I would rather drink something with a cigarette in it over Dipspit. Dipspit. Ten times out of ten. Correct. I actually think, I hate to admit this,

I definitely drank a beer that had a cigarette put out in it at a party one time and i spit it out washed my mouth out threw it away and acted like it never happened that's just low-key didn't tell me as fuck it's so gross i told you about my my margarita taco cabana when i pulled a fingernail clipping off oh no the worst man i don't even want to tell this. It's not me. This is my, this is the one thing.

I've got a good stomach until you get to hair. And Norris was it. I'm not going to even name the name. It was Raising Cane's. He picked up his chicken strip and like a fry was connected to it by hair. So the hair got fried too. How come hair on your head is like, it's not gross? I don't know.

It falls off your head. It's like the nastiest shit. Because any hair that's not yours is just gross. It's bad. True. I'm on the more not worried about hair scale than most people. But that is disgusting. Hair in my food, it's automatic send back.

I can't get past it. I can't do that because I have to bet that the hair in the food is mine. It's hair in the food. You can usually tell. If it's a dark brown hair, if it's short, it's from my beard. If it's long, I assume it's from my head. If it's like really long, then I'm like, that's disgusting. The weird thing

is if it was like a long blonde hair and I'm eating dinner with Brett and I'm like, oh, it's Brett's hair, I would be able to get past it. Now, if it was touching my food, I would be weird. But if it was just in my plate, I'd be like, alright, let me get rid of it. Look away. Fine. I'm back to eating. But I have to know the source. The grossest hair I've ever found was in

a refried black beans at Matt's Hot Ranch all the time. Don't tell me that. No, it's the only time I've ever had it happen there, and I had to just set it to the side, which is, if you know me, you know I'm upset. I love those refried black beans. I love them. The worst hair is the... I don't know what to say. That's gross.

The phantom hair on the back side of the toilet, and you're like, oh, that's... Where did that come from? Can we get out of here? I worked somewhere where the boss would manscape. Subway? Nope.

He would manscape and then he would clearly go into the office and do his business. And there would just be like – Clippings? Clippings all over the toilet. I'm like, dude, what? How do you not – what are you doing? How are you not doing like a fluffer job down there or something? You always do it before you shower.

Yeah. Well, that's the move. You got to do it before you shower. 100%. This has been gross. Let's get out of here. Yeah, we can get out of here. Have a great weekend.

Bye. See you guys Friday for voicemails. Oh, tune in to Mail It. Say bye again. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye.

Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye.