Circling Back - Ghost Tours & Ankle Socks

Episode Date: September 27, 2023

The rumors are indeed true. We went on a Ghost Tour in Austin, Texas. We also dip into EmRata's takes on socks, an update on the chess grandmaster accused of cheating, the British Airways pilot who had a NIGHT before flying, a 10-year-old who drove 3 hours in his mom's car, and a woman who went all-in to retrieve her Apple Watch from a port-a-potty. Enjoy a free two-week trial on Patreon for additional weekly episodes: www.patreon.com/circlingbackpodcast Watch all of our full episodes on our new YouTube channel: www.youtube.com/circlingback  Shop Washed Merch: www.washedmedia.shop  (0:00) Fun & Easy Banter (15:30) We Went On A Ghost Tour (31:40) Emily Ratajkowski’s New Ick (37:30) Chess Vibrator Update (49:00) British Airways Pilot (58:40) How much you selling out for your Apple Watch? (1:04:20) How long is 10-year-old you making it in a stolen car? (1:09:15) This Weekend in Fun Support This Episode’s Sponsors Earlybird CBD: www.earlybirdcbd.com (BACKER for 20% off) Groove Life: www.groovelife.com/steam (20% off everything!) Twillory: www.twillory.com (WASHED18 for $18 off first order of $139 or more) Squarespace: www.squarespace.com/steam (STEAM for 10% off your purchase of a website or domain) --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/circling-back/message Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

all right we're back circling back podcast coming to you live from austin te. My name's Will DeFreeze. To my left, David, Mr. Bing Bong. Rough. Actually, David's not here today. He's at the urologist. Today, you've got Spooky Boy Swag. Really? He's making his second consecutive appearance? Correct. Yeah. They is the, they were like talking about how well he did producing. And they're like, we got to get you in front of the camera. You're not a behind the scenes guy, spooky boy slag. Fun, isn't it? So to pull back the curtain a little bit, Dave. Pretty much, yeah.

I'm going to gas you up a little bit. Yesterday, Dylan had left the office a little before four o'clock. You were working from home in the afternoon. And I look over and i see randy just editing yesterday's episode of do you know it a game show podcast on patreon and randy's just laughing he's just he's just having the time of his life and i'm like what are you laughing at he's like dude dave just crushed producing wow i think i might have a future behind the camera hey like a pov thing like me producing from my point of view

so i'm saying did you keep the camera on me a little a little extra because you know you were sitting next to randy and i you know i was i was aware but i gotta say the a lot of the comedy was coming from that side because you had you had will just on fire and then you had pretz just absolutely defeated just taking i don't want to spoil it. I did win from a straight up comedy point. Dylan came in with a comedy point though. I also gave away a point

in the middle of the episode. There's a lot of controversy when it comes to yesterday's episode of Do You Know What A Game Show podcast. I think Dylan even told Randy to give you a comedy point at one point. I put together a pretty good game show. You i was pretty happy with you i was pretty happy with well i did win once but this one this one was better yeah that was kind of a limited field i still don't know how you won once i don't i don't either yeah it's like that scene from uh

old school where will ferrell just blacks out for a little bit yeah i don't know the second you said it's like that scene, the first thing I thought of was Will Ferrell on the rings just smoking a cigarette. And that was you during the music section just trudging through. Exactly. It was kind of like Mike Weir winning the Masters. He caught lightning in a bottle one time.

People were like, okay. All right. You know what? I'll take it. Or would you rather be Lucas Glover with the US Open? Bag. I'll be Mike Weir. Jimmy Walker with the PGA.

Shout out to Rowdy Gentleman. You could just keep throwing a bunch of these out there probably, but I'll stick with Mike Weir. Of the three, you like Mike Weir? Yeah. We have two major winners from this year who like – they're not sexy names to me. Harmon's a dog.

Hey, nice shirt, bitch. He is a dog. He is a dog. Got the same shirt on hey what i would have what did you guys no like low-key link we don't talk we don't talk outside of work backer20 at roback.com why'd you guys link we didn't it's just coincidental man we just like the shirt i mean i have that shirt too i could have worn it why don't you quit biting our shit randy's wearing a roback today too i. I'm wearing Roback shorts, actually, so we're a Robie Dow.

Backer 20. I did something today I never do. Oh, Dylan Chivry, ladies and gentlemen. Hey, everybody. We have quite the show for you today. It's going to be an excellent day of content. Just stick around, and you'll see what we're talking about. Hey, happy to be here, man.

I did something today I don't do often okay i um was too lazy to make coffee it's very easy to do dude i know i know i was so lazy that i just went to starbucks oh my god i don't like going to starbucks starbs what's your order i don't have an order. Sally's like, do you want Grande or Venti? And I was like, I don't know the difference between Grande or Venti. Venti's the big boy. How are you supposed to know this? Venti means 20 in Italian. Oh, like Venti in Spanish.

20 ounces. Uno, due, tre, quattro, cinque, se. All the way up to Venti. Venti. The sizing on Starbucks cups, awful. There's some coffee shops you go to and you order a medium and they're like, we don't have mediums here. We have small, large, and Mondo. And it's like, what's your medium?

Give me the large then. That is the medium size of everything you have. Starbucks gives me the large. Tall Grande Venti,i i think is how they do it that's so stupid it is stupid if i hear something's tall i'm like that's it that feels big dylan i'm gonna i'm gonna dial something back and i'm gonna give you a compliment oh you're not mike weir you're adam scott what why are you doing adam scott like this got a small head okay he does have a small head and no offense you have a big head

it's proportional though thank you um ish but he's a handsome fella oh and yeah i think you're a handsome guy oh thanks david you know i think you're handsome too man i don't care thank you though he also might be colorblind because he wears a lot of outfits that are just monochrome no they're all the exact same color. Shout out to the tan on tan. He'll go khaki on khaki. Straight up, like Barrett and I talked about on retail therapy the other day, earth tones are so in right now that you can really just buy earth tones and just hop

in your closet, grab something out, and just start layering. That might be good for you. I need to go shopping. Do you have sections of your closet where you say, these are the colors that I struggle with, so I might need to get some clearance, and these are the colors that i know i can go with what i usually do is i just go like heavy contrast like i'm wearing dark shorts and a white polo i know i can't fuck that up you know i mean that's what i do pretty much every day can i get the retail

therapy boys that come shopping with me i mean sure let's go where do you want to go yeah that's you i'm all right i'm taking y'all okay yeah we can go we can we can link up we can link up i should do a video. Randy can take us to Kohl's. Dude, I want to go to Kohl's because I see on Instagram all the time there's dudes that are like, oh, I just found these at Kohl's. And it's like a cool pair of sneakers that are really hard to find or like a jacket that shouldn't be at Kohl's. And I want to start digging through.

That's kind of sick. I just had 40% off. You should have let me know. You should have let me know. It's true. Fair point. We got a huge episode today. Let's get some announcements out of the way.

First and foremost, the Wilmonds polo that Randy is wearing from Roback.com is available still. Use backer20 for 20% off anything at Roback.com. As you know, we did do Do You Know It yesterday. Next week, we'll do Do You Know It yesterday. Next week, we'll probably be doing exactly five minutes on

Patreon. And as always, we do a weekly list or voicemail episode. You can listen to those on Patreon or on Spotify. We also have the

newsletter we're doing, wash.substack.com. You can watch every episode at youtube.com slash circling back and you can shop at washmedia.shop.

I'm wearing a sexy jawn today from the Wash Media shop. It's the training top and it's just sexy. Don't promote it too much because you can't buy it right now.shop. I'm wearing a sexy jawn today from the Wash Media shop. It's the training top, and it's just sexy. Don't promote it too much because you can't buy it right now. Yo, it's low-key sold out. Yeah, instead, let's promote what I've got on my head. What do you have on your head, David?

It's something that you can't buy yet. Yeah. Dave's doing a little tease right now. You'll have to tune into the YouTube to see. Tease me. YouTube.com slash circling back, and it's time, my friends, for Will's five-star review. I think Randy's got something. Tease me. YouTube.com slash circling back and it's time, my friends, for Will's five-star review

of the week. I just have to correct something. We're not doing exactly five minutes next week because next week is the start

of spooky season. Oh. Officially be in October. You idiot, Will. Tobes. You idiot. Man, the best time of year. I forgot, man.

Spooky season. Let's go. Send in your stories spooky at wash media.com sign up at patreon.com circling back podcast spooky season is the most fun time of year to be a patron go do it i'm sorry i fucked that up that's okay i was uh i was vetting uh spooky at washed media.com which is where you can send your stories to gaseous and uh we're pretty loaded up i i need more we need more it's not about me but look let me just say little pumpkin could use a few more stories for the back end really back end of the show stories for the back not his personal back

end that's covered does this promise to be the spookiest season yet i don't like to make promises i can't keep which is why i am going to tell you right the fuck now this is going to be the spookiest season yet i don't like to make promises i can't keep which is why i am going to tell you right the now this is going to be the spookiest spooky season you've ever been a part of whoa so you better wear your adult diaper so you can pee and pee in it because you might be your pants it's so scary probably i probably won't do that but thank you for the suggestion remember that astronaut she drove across the country in an adult diaper, so she could like – Yeah, totally normal behavior. Kill her ex or something.

I don't know what it was. Something fucked up. She got arrested. Taking a five-minute pee break is not the end of the world. Just pull over. No, she had to get there. Have you heard both sides? Like, what's your problem?

I don't need to hear the other side. You're going to tell her she can't do – Like, I'm all about personal freedoms. No, yeah. I mean, she's not hurting anybody, I guess, but it's still... No, I think she was literally trying to hurt someone. It's alarming behavior. Yeah, I think that was the point. I think she was actually trying to kill someone.

That's serious hatred. If you were like, you know what? This can't come soon enough. I'm going to have to wear this adult diaper. I can't delay this murder for another 20 minutes. You kind of want her on your team, though. Anyone that's willing to put on an adult diaper and drive cross country to accomplish something like that's,

that's dog status. She's a gamer. Yeah. She's a gamer. Yeah. Whoa. He's a gamer. She's a lady.

You replace gamer with, or lady with gamer. Yeah. Ladies can game too. You know what? I know you don't believe that. Tom Jones. Who's that?

I've gotten several. Hey, this guy's on fire. I've gotten several relaxing video game recommendations from lady backers thank you to all the lady backers out there playing chill video games was the lawn mowing one one of them no uh but i did get one that's just a dude you're a dude in wyoming at a lookout point and you're just sending off flares and shit so i think i'm gonna download that That sounds pretty mega. What are you looking out for? You're trying to get saved.

Something happens to your lookout spot and you're stranded. And so the entire game is that. But apparently you can also just walk around the mountaintops in Wyoming, cleaning up other people's campsites and vibing out. So I think this is not a game. It's a game, dude. I'm going to get it. Cleaning up campsites. Yeah, dog.

Why wouldn't you just use your cell phone? Because it blew up. It blew up, dude. I don't know. Something happens to this guy's like campsite yeah dog why wouldn't you just use your cell phone because dude it blew up get me dude it blew up dude i don't know something happens to this guy's like campsite and it all goes away i watched the trailer on it did a bear drag his shit away or something no a witch a blair witch stacked a bunch of rocks outside his tent and he freaked out shit himself doesn't sound chill anymore no it's not that's not it cleaning up campsites and sending off flares yeah it's amazing you ever shot a flare gun nope part of the reason we never did it was because we always No, it's not. That's not it. Cleaning up campsites and sending off flares. Yeah. It's amazing. You ever shot a flare gun?

Nope. Part of the reason we never did it was because we always, like, we're like, well, what if we actually need it for something? Because, like, most boats have flare guns on them, and we're always like, it would be really fun to shoot this off, but, like, what if we get stranded 10 minutes from now? We're like, oh, we're idiots. You're not going to get stranded. Yeah, I don't know. You shot a Roman candle, though. I think about the Roman candle empire all the time

yeah that's good guys are in their bag today hey can we do will's five-star review yeah yeah of the week oh there it is yes i have three this week because it was so good we've got we got some gas in the in the reviews right now. We've got from Sally Beth. Sally's middle name is not Beth, so I did not tell my wife to do this. It says, five stars despite the fact that I'm singing Owl City in my head and Googling dolphin penis for the first time in my life. Oh, yeah, right. Dude, dolphin penises are crazy, though.

Yeah. We also have user 11-1-d one dash dash dash sick username honestly uh it says there's something that just hits different about the apps from dave's couch i don't disagree i think the different thing about it was that we were doing it in my home and not here at the studio yeah yeah glaring difference yeah and then our final review of the week is from Bodybag69. Nice. Noted user. Noted user.

It says, OG Mug Plug. Said, the other day I was driving on Halloween and this guy's car flipped and I had to cut him out of his seatbelt and drag him out of the car. First, the cop showed up. And when the news reporter got there, I was thinking she was going to ask me what happened. Are you going to accept a key to the city? And instead, she looked at me dead in the eyes and said, what is Dorn's deal? Yeah, I famously saved someone's life one time. I was very heroic in doing so.

Well, you need to thank this person because it says, seriously, I am the one who started the mug game. Check the receipts. It was me. You know, Dylan. Oh, thank you. What's this person's name? Bodybag69. Thank you to Bodybag69. Not sure if that's their birth name for the generous mug and for starting a trend that's filled our

cabinet with mugs very cool mugs so thank you and also yes i was a hero on halloween four-ish years ago and we should all remember that they say that that guy would still be in his seat belt upside down in his vehicle if you hadn't been there. That was scary as shit, man. I'm not going to lie. You were carrying him away and the car exploded. It was a serious situation. Your boy stepped up when you guys would have run the other way. I stepped up.

I cut a man free from his seatbelt, hanging up upside down in the cab of his truck. Saved his life. And you know what? Didn't even get a key to the city or a plaque or anything and just you know i'm humble i don't need that stuff he drives in cabs i drink cabs we are not the same i'm humble i don't need to let people know about it but people need to know about it dude that's crazy because like nobody else would have done that can i ask a favor from the people uh watching this dave's cap or his hat i need uh give me feedback on it let me know if you if you

like it if you would cop it's embroidered by the way if you can't tell that is an embroidered washed on dave's hat dave's the perfect model you've been getting shouts from like milan and stuff right you got a hot little face so it works no yeah hey i didn't know i was gonna get isolated like this. I'm kind of embarrassed. Don't be embarrassed. You look hot. It's about the hat, not you.

Don't take it. Yeah. It's the only time you'll see me capping. Yeah. Wow. I keep it 100. Wow. I think that hat would go very well with a lot of stuff from Twillery.

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Again, that is WASHED18 for $18 off your first order of $139 or more at Twillery.com. Twillery, tailored for performance. And we love to perform. Twilled to freeze over here. Yeah, dude. Yeah. That's good. His name's Will. That's good. It's right there in Twillery. Yeah, it's also a helping verb. People use it all the time.

I'll be at like a cafe just vibing and someone will be like, yeah, will you get that from me? And I'm like, what? It's also a document that explains what to do with your assets once you pass away dude cream at my assets a well day speaking of crematoriums we went on a ghost tour last night we would i'm still chill dude i didn't sleep last night at all either like dave said no i didn't either mainly because of the uh adderall i took i didn't take adderall um yeah shout out to our good friends at austin ghost uh part of the u.s ghost tours um they uh

they hooked us up they'd let us do a little walking ghost tour of downtown did you know so many places downtown were haunted i think we all knew the driscoll we've all heard the driscoll story that's the only the only thing and i grew up in this city and that's the only thing i've ever heard you built this city on rock and roll i don't i don't play i was gonna say i did not i did not know this about you built this city no no no no no oh man did you know that Cockfight was haunted? So last night, I learned that there's a bar named Cockfight in Austin, Texas that's haunted. It looks sick, by the way. Yeah. Randy, you've been, right?

It's a very cool rooftop bar in downtown Austin. Cool, man. I guess we'll get the invite one day. Well, so last night, we squatted up. We went to the Omni Hotel, and we ripped a quick dinner beforehand where we watched a conference unfold. We came up with like the – No, no, no. I can't say it. We came up with a movie idea that we can't talk about because I think we're just going to write the script and get rich. We started like conceptualizing the script. Yes. Essentially- I can't believe it hasn't been done yet.

If you're like a big conference guy, like just hit us up. Yeah. Or if you are a producer. That's my new Twitter account. Big conference guy. I'm just obsessed with lady parts. Big conference guy. Okay. Okay. And we met up with a dude named Vincent who had a lantern. Yes.

Which is swag. That's the identifying feature. They say, look out, the tour guide will be there. By the steps of the Omni with a lantern vincent was born to do that job i don't know what this says about me but when i heard there was gonna be a lantern i didn't really consider it to just be like a lantern that he held that was like a like electric i legit like thought he was gonna have like a big staff with like a lantern hanging off of it that he was gonna like walk around oh that would have been and like and then i showed up and i was like oh this makes a lot more sense i wanted to be at least be like a real gas lantern it wasn't

did y'all do a ghost tour last year was it a haunted house it was a haunted house okay so this is everyone's first ghost tour yeah yes he asked in the beginning of the tour who believes in ghosts and who is a skeptic and i i raised my hand saying i believed in ghosts because i thought that's what he would want you you faked it i should have been a skeptic i should have been in the skeptic he admitted that he himself i know when he did that i was like dude will you got to trust you you got to be yourself in front of vincent why would you be an opposer in front of vincent because i wanted to impress him yeah i get it god i wanted to like gas him up and be like dude i totally believe in you and what you're doing. What was the most terrifying story that we heard?

Well, we talked about the Driscoll Hotel. Which is, if you know Austin, you know that that's rumored to be a very haunted place. Room 525, I believe. Built in 1885, pretty old for this city. A few murders. Was rock and roll even around? There was a murder suey.

Wasn't there an LBJ? LBJ after he got elected in 1964. Yeah, Dave. Did he not mention that? He did. Okay. Just say LBJ.

Don't say LBJ. What? You've got some issues. Didn't they used to call you LBJ back in the day? Yeah. Didn't they used to call you the Austin Ghost? I'm talking about the murder suey that took place in the hotel and you guys are making BJ jokes.

Last night we were walking away from the hotel where they talked about the murder suey and Dylan said to me, man, no good ever comes in murder suey. And I was like, well, yeah, Dylan, it's a murder suicide. I don't know why it's so fun to say murder suey, but it's a very serious matter. matter if both people were like bad people it's a very serious matter you don't know that they were both bad no no if though that would be a scenario when the murder murder suey was like a positive what murder yeah he was the best guy around i was both

freaked out by the i think the cockfight bar the cremation dude when he knocked on those bricks and I was like Oh, dude, we were staying from the whole time and we didn't know that They're just burning bodies downtown is I noticed that that there was like a part that was painted and you could tell it was different I just thought it was like a little entrance into a basement that they covered up didn't know that was where they slid the bodies They're bare naked butts do they spit roast them you asked me that during the tour while he's talking while he's talking will just leans over to me do you think they spit roast all right what did he say did he say yes i don't know like they might do it you don't know how they cream i've never cremated anybody so i don't know if you spit roast them

or not you know weirdly i haven't either well yeah it's interesting that it went from a cremation to and now what is it cockfights i don't think they have actual composition in there david have you guys ever been to a cockfight no no i i was at a i went to a cockfight in mexico when i was really young shut up i swear to god in the middle of a restaurant we were in the middle of a restaurant i think we were in cancun and everyone like got in a circle and they put two chickens down they started going at each other they at least have uh talon covers i don't remember i was i mean when i say i was young i was legitimately like four or five years old damn that's that's redeveloped your blood i mean it was the early 90s they didn't have social media and shit back then i don't

want to see roosters fight to the death what about cocks though that's what that's another word for rooster i don't want to see that man i get it i get it i bet it's lit though like on the low you you ever seen some people play cocks mush yeah yeah i came up with that game actually that's a north that's a north austin crew original joke. We played cocksmoosh, yeah. We didn't. Do I want to ask? No. Okay. But that is... That's vintage.

That was a joke back at the frat house. We used to have fun with it. It wasn't an actual thing. Did you all see that tweet the other day about the fraternity that got suspended from campus? No. Okay. What'd they do? Yeah, they did. Apparently they were throating each other to completion per the tweet i think it was a joke tweet though i don't know if it was serious okay i did some googling about some chapter suspensions i feel like that if that's consensual it shouldn't get you kicked off no that's a little bit

discriminatory no yeah i agree i agree i don't know the full facts, though. So I'm not going to opine. Right, right. Anyway, what about that fucking ghost, Fred? Wasn't there a ghost named Fred? Yeah, I think he was the one at Buffalo Billiards that was just a real shyster. Hey, really bummed out that Buffalo Billiards is closed.

I didn't realize that. That was a good spot. I used to go there. Maybe you should have gone was a good spot. I used to go there. Maybe you should have gone more often, David. I used to go there and hustle. People had lots of money. I was last there throwing darts when I was like 22. It's probably good that it's closed because that seems like a place where I'd get my ass kicked.

It's mainly frag. I'd like to take some quarters off someone's table. It's not like you're not going to run into a Hell's Angel there. Go put on a 23-minute dead song on the jukebox and get beat up no it's it's frat it's frat dudes frat dudes took that place over it was a pretty frat it was frat dudes who were um after their like like super party years on 36 and they're like we're gonna go to billiards and you know just kind of be low-key play pool like we're not going to like buckshot or fucking maggie mays but they'd still hammer beers oh they, they're hammering beers.

Like a zillion of them. A gazillion of them. Yeah, well, that's just life when you're a motherfucking frat star. Exactly. Chugs probably goes through there. I saw Chugs there last time I was there. Barstool Chugs? Yeah.

Yeah. He was hammering. I'm glad he made it through the layoffs at Barstool. I didn't think he was going to make it. That's the one I was most... He doesn't have much of a following compared to all the other people. That's the one I was most worried about. Yeah, I get it.

If he ever does get let go, we'll make him an offer. Oh, we got to land him immediately. Give him a signing bow. Hey, SVP. We'll call him Wash Chugs, though, if he's here. Yeah, he's got to change his app. He's got a really good idea. He's got to change his app.

The only one I'm not real sure about, and I don't want to give too much of the tour away, but the Alexander Hamilton one, or was it that one? Or the one who – the guys who – across from the Paramount, William Tip? I think it was Walter. Walter Tip, which is interesting. I just – I couldn't tell if our tour guide was just riffing because I never really got to the bottom of it. He just spits facts, dude. It sounded like the conversation between those who were haunted

and the ghost who was doing the haunting was a little bit too casual of a back and forth for an interaction with a ghost. Vincent was very easily distracted by his surroundings. It's like he'd never heard of a system drive by. Some dude would drive by in a Harley, and he would... No, he wanted to pause so that he could get...

So we didn't get obstructed. But then he would talk about it for the next two minutes. We were all thinking about it. A motorcycle. Like, yeah. I'm really proud of the entire squad for how few times we even considered making I think you should leave ghost tour jokes. Like, I'm very proud of us.

It's too choogy to do on the tour. The first thing that i got like when i got home sally just looked at me and she goes did you guys just do i think you should leave bits the entire time and i was like no we actually didn't it's a fair question we actually didn't we it was not a private tour there were four people who'd actually um more than four signed up yeah there was we were only about half a tour and so but we were the only ones with a with a cameraman and lob mics cameraman yeah randy had a camera do you not know some man yeah he's our cameraman

why do you emphasize man it was just hierarchy yeah there's just one of them cameraman cameraman okay anyway um yeah randy our camera how about vincent's last joke about the long walk to the last destination swag he crushed. He crushed that. He said the best for last. It devastated me. I was already sweating and I was like, a long walk to the last location? You got to be better about this. Because the walk to the second to last one was actually long.

He said, all right, this one's going to be long. I was like, oh, man, I just want to leave. It was hot. I was having fun, but I was just too hot to want to walk. It was a walk to remember. He walked across a sidewalk. That was the joke. It was really Yeah. It was a walk to remember. You walked across a sidewalk. That was the joke. It was really funny.

It was kind of like, yeah. I almost wore jeans. Can we add Vincent to the squad? Yeah. Yeah. He's kind of electric. Yeah. Yeah.

I've always wanted to have a dude that does like magic in the squad. I made the comment last night. No, I'm just saying. I'm just making a blanket statement. You think he dabbles in magic because he's in the paranormal field? I think that if you do ghost tours, I think you at least have a closer connection to someone who does magic than if you do podcasts. He could point us in the right direction for a magician.

Yeah. He's very closely connected to a magician. Yeah. I made this comment last night. I don't know if it was fully appreciated. He's Spooky Adam, our old video guy. He was he was current video guy he reminded me so much of him adam cool adam i don't know if you've been following his weightlifting journey he's like only a few pounds away from being part of the thousand pound club not that he's gained that many pounds but he

his ability to lift dude it would be it would be a wild scene if Adam decided to put on like 830 pounds. Is that adding different exercises together? What is it? It's deadlift squat bench. So it's kind of like a nice – I mean it's – Like hypothetically. He's nice with it. Hypothetically, if I was trying to see where I am in the 1,000-pound club right now, like where am I probably –

You're probably in the 300-pound club. I was going to say I think – I don't think i'm getting out of 300 this doesn't i think your squat's probably better than you think this i've never squat i'm famously never squat should we do the will squat challenge yeah you would be you'd be sore for seven days it would be awful correct yeah should i do it right before sally has uh this baby and then i just can't lift the baby for a week because i did one single deadlift your muscles be like what the fuck is going what dude what did you do hold on time out did you get stuck under a building gotta keep them guessing though dude your. Your muscles. That's right.

You got to. When he was given some of those stories, did you find yourselves just looking up into the windows hoping you'd see a shadowy figure? Because that's all I did. It also made me want to do some Googling. Did you do any Googling? I haven't, yeah.

I plan to. I want to look up the murder suey situation at the Driscoll. I like that he is an Austin native, our man Vincent. I like that we spent some time downtown, not in a bar, just kind of walking around. I actually got to look around downtown and not just be a piece of shit for once. But it was kind of cool to just sit there

and hear about these stories from Austin. I enjoyed it. I know. it was interesting shout out vincent shout out what's the place called again uh cockfights oh austin ghosts austin ghosts we got to go to cockfights that look like a cool bar i'll go we walked by a number of bars last night and we were will and i were both having trouble like determining where we were they look cool and i'm like i would go to bars, much like when I'm on the east side, but I'll never fucking go.

I took a young lady on a date there a long time ago, but it was called Handlebar. That was when it was Handlebar. Did you Austin ghost her? Austin ghosted her. Dylan. It didn't work out. She was very nice though.

What's her name? He vanished in the night. What's her at? I don't remember her name. Give us the at. Please put her on blast. I don't remember her name. She has blocked me.

Oh, she's doing great, though. She probably is. She's thriving. She probably misses me like crazy. I heard she didn't want your swag around her because you had some ugly George Costanza wallet that no one could get over looking at whenever you busted it out to buy one single drink. I have since upgraded, though. Dylan, she's missing you like candy. I know how much you love Seinfeld.

Like, I do. I know you're a big Seinfeld guy, and I always thought it was weird that you tried to have an exact replica of George's wallet. And I'm glad that you've finally gotten the groove of things. We're talking about groove life, baby. I didn't even know this is what we were doing. I totally missed this. I know you didn't, but that's okay. We have a professional over here.

It's really good. It's 2023 didn't, but that's okay. We have a professional over here. It's really good. It's 2023. Yes, that's the year. It's time to get current, baby. Some of you, some of you guys out there are still using the same wall from 2003. Now it's the time to update your wallet game with Groove Life.

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these wallets have a 94 year no BS warranty what? it's 94 years old just like you the wallet doesn't sound like that that's when it's 94 years old and I'm doing great

if the wallet had a voice at the end of it's life that's what it would sound like I'm built different I'm made out of titanium Right. If the wallet had a voice at the end of its life, that's what it would sound like. Wow, wallet, what's your secret? I'm built different. I'm made out of titanium. Ooh. Ooh. Tell me more.

Built for everyday use. No, but these things are swag. They go with all the iPhones you need. 12s, 13s, 14s. They got it all. They got the microsection technology that helps you just add another three cards plus cash. That's my issue, dude. You know I'm cash heavy. Straight cash.

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camera i believe because there's been a slight disagreement on whether no shows or like the mid-ankle sock are in right now and while i do concede that those might be the trend i'm still a no-show guy that's just who i am sometimes i know show sometimes i do show sometimes i'll hit you with a crew though crew sock tube sock you know what i mean where my crew at i'll mix it up just like hey man you're not seeing shit today except for like mid and uh you know mid yeah we're used to mid with you anyway emirata what does she say famous she pro or con famous model actress has weighed in and said that a new ick oh no a new ick and this is devastating personally is uh she doesn't like to see a man's ankles i think she even called them dainty like i don't want to see dainty she said and i quote

a dainty ankle exposed on the hottest man will ruin my day it's like maybe she saw me on the tl or something that inspired this like why like what what what ruin it will ruin a man just because you can see you know the the last four inches of his ankle it'll ruin a man dude i like my ankles man like without without being able to show my ankles my legs don't look that good i'll end you with no shows today yeah dude i'm hitting with a little no show today let's see it bitch bust it out oh shit i see a little show there's a little show they're peeking it's a little it's a small to mid-size show day what are you working right now i'm not showing dude shows your ankles dog not a shower i mean here's the thing i understand

the use cases for all different socks, but I don't think that we should just put the ick on one particular style. How is this an ick? Like, I think when dudes show ankles, I think it shows some confidence. I think it shows a little bit of like, you know what? I got it like that. Look, I don't have great legs. I don't have big, powerful legs, but I do like my legs.

I like to show a little skin. What's the big deal think i think this whole ick thing is just a little mean i think it's a little bullyish yeah and rod i might have some icks about you hey let's respond to her that might be really devastating but like what like do you want to officially respond to her we should does she tweet you want to do a notes app we could just respond with that photo of Will and I with the ankle socks and just kind of let her know, like, hey, we're two guys who completely co-sign what you're saying. I want to know what she – she didn't say, like, what she prefers instead of the no-show.

Do you like the mid-ankle like you guys – like Rainey has on right now? She's like a full crew sock. Like, what is she talking about? Dude, I don't know, man. Is it crazy of me to not dude i don't know man and like is it crazy me to not i don't like wearing tall socks because i don't like how it makes like all the hair on my legs just kind of cling to me and feel uncomfortable i'd like to point out that reina just showed uh his socks to nobody only us yeah only us i got a camera back here

the backers can see my socks oh really i'm? I'm sure they're really excited. I've actually just had it on me the whole time, this whole episode. Really? So I got to see you posting Instagrams and Tinder and whatever it is you do. It's Hinge. Hinging. Want me to buy some mid-anks? I don't know. Here's the thing.

Emrata is someone that I would like to impress. So if I know that I might be around her anytime soon, I might cover the ankles a little bit. I think she recently said publicly that she would go on a date with anyone. Not like anyone, but you don't have to be a somebody. I think I believe her. You don't have to be – I think her ex-husband was like a nobody before. No, no, he wasn't.

He was like a movie producer and shit. Oh, really? Yeah, he kind of had it was like a movie producer and shit. Oh, really? Yeah, he kind of had it like that. Okay, never mind. What about podcasters? She any of those? I don't know. Why would you ask that?

She's famously a podcaster herself, so it'd be very weird if she was against us. What's her pod called? I forget. I think it's called... Empada? I forget. That's good.

It's not. The Amarataverse. That's probably not it either. I think I listened to like one episode of it so yeah i'm gonna ask her out on a date i shouldn't relate to it now okay before you do that what does she think about like crusty socks that are like feel like they have starch on them it's a good question what does she think about like t-shirts that are balled up in a drawer and then given to you yeah Yeah, I don't know. What does she think about Russell Athletic shorts?

Is this an ad read? That was eight years ago. And I had one pair. You're never going to live it down. Those were kind of sick shorts. What does she think about overly complicated shirts? Dan Flashes.

Do you think she knows what Dan Flashes is? Do you think Emrata knows? Probably not. I don't know that that crew neck is sick dude i know i know i really we should send one to m rata and see if she'll post it on instagram i really freak with it yeah if i know ask her her address you freak with the trading top it's prettyhmm. It's pretty lit sauce. It is pretty lit sauce, Will. Anyway, yeah, I'm pretty upset this morning. This upset me too, and mainly because I'm going to have to –

I think I'm going to talk this out with Barrett on retail therapy and be like, Barrett, you got to script my sock game for the entire fall. I don't know what to do anymore. Barrett was ahead of the ankle sock trend, I got to say, as he always is. That's kind of what he does yeah yeah can we go back a little bit sometimes to go forward you have to go back matthew mcconaughey green light um we did a story i think maybe earlier this year maybe last year who knows maybe it was years ago but it was a guy named hans nieman who is a chess savant some

people call him a grandmaster i think that's the official title he was accused in september of 2022 of uh cheating in a match with the magnus carlson a norwegian grandmaster magnus carlson strong name yeah it's like a strong man magnus well last month these two settled the lawsuit over the alleged cheating claims um the lawsuit is much more money than i could have fathomed to be in a a chess lawsuit let me guess like 10 million dollars do you have any guesses dylan how much this lawsuit was settled for? You said 10 million, Dave? That's my guess. $400,000.

$100 million. What? $100 million. Okay. Part of this was this cheating allegation was that the American, Hans, had a vibrating sex toy in his butt that would indicate to him what moves to make. Yep. Oh, yeah. I remember this. I do remember this.

Yeah. Because we explored this for podcast purposes. Yeah. So we were having trouble like we were talking over each other a lot during this time we do that and it became an issue like we had listeners complaining and stuff like that and so we all decided that if grandmasters are doing this maybe we should try to put some stuff in our butts and so randy actually has a board back there that vibrates when we're supposed to each talk. Oh, yeah, it's my turn. There you go.

Thank you. A little slow there, Randy. Are you posting to Instagram right now? Calm down, Randy. No. Well, he went on Piers Morgan to go discuss this. Has he been exonerated? I don't know.

How much money for you to have a lawsuit out there about you allegedly having something in your butt vibrating to cheat at your career? How much is enough to get you to be like, okay, that's fine. If the first thing you Google is something in your butt vibrating to cheat at your career like how much how much is enough to get you to be like okay that's fine if the first thing you google is something in my butt like at least i have this amount of money in my bank account it's not a headline i want to be associated with certainly but if you're cheating i want you to get exposed i don't care how you're doing it neiman told mor Morgan that he believed last year

has strengthened his resolve and he insisted to the host that he did not cheat. Morgan continued talking about the claims that Neiman was getting signals from someone through a remote-controlled sex toy. Pierce went right at him. Pierce said, quote, to be clear on the specific allegation, have you ever used anal beads while playing chess that's no one's business he responded well your curiosity is a bit concerning you know maybe you're personally interested but i can tell you no categorically no of course not i like that answer though the beginning of the answer a little defensive for someone that's not putting stuff in their butts i don't like he. I don't like butt stuff.

You like butt stuff. He reined it in, I guess. But yeah, he started that kind of weird. Yeah, if you start like that in the conversation with me, I'm like, oh, I have this person a little bit. He started with a non-answer, and then he answered. Are we riding with the Norwegian or the American here? Something about this story stinks.

Okay. okay you log it i did log the joke what did they settle for we don't know though okay so he initially sued for 100 million dollars and they settled for way less than that because that's absurd well he's been sued by chess.com because they claim that he cheated in more than 100 games online so like he's been sued before for cheating and so like i i don't want to say that this guy was doing butt stuff to win chess tournaments but i think he might have been can't you just uh he sued chess.com can't you just like see how he performs like make sure he's not cheating and then like all right go let's let's see what you got and go do it without the help of a vibrator you know i don't know x-ray him or something you make sure he's not holding go through the tsa thing you know what i mean and then like all right let's see what you got buddy that little microblast or radiation i will i will personally volunteer to do cavity

searches of all chess grandmasters before their matches you want to do that i'll do it if that's what if that's what needs to happen in order to make sure that chess has a clear name i'll do it you guys fuck with that bobby fisher movie or what i never saw it we had some teachers in high school who just showed it to us like once a year for some reason so i've seen bobby fisher four times they're trying to inspire you i think so i think so i think they were showing us being like hey this this kid's smarter than you yeah figure it out see this guy figure it out i don't even like to play chess i'd rather play checkers it's a it's a thinking man's game man i'm not a thinking man yeah it's i'd rather play battleship battleships kind of electronic battles's kind of sick. Electronic Battleship. It's kind of sick.

I mean, Battleship was pretty swag back in the day. Great game. Hit. Do you guys play any board games these days? Scrabble. See, I'd like to be a Scrabble family. We're a Bananagrams family, which is related to Scrabble. I freak with Scrabble, man.

Really? I love it. I like Parcheesi. He's my fam. Okay, I think you and I should do a... I think we should play a WASH Media Scrabble game where we put like a camera above the board looking right down and it's just us vibing playing Scrabble. I play Wits and Wagers a lot with Parks because he loves the game. Have you ever played Wits and Wagers? No.

Can you tell me what Wits and Wagers is? Yeah. You get a question that you're supposed to guess a number between like a wide range, a number that you wouldn't know, like how many marbles can fit inside a swimming pool, for example. No one knows the answer. You're supposed to guess a number between a wide range, a number that you wouldn't know, like how many marbles can fit inside a swimming pool, for example. No one knows the answer, but who's to guess? Like how many anal beads can fit inside a chess grandmaster? Can we just, okay. And then everyone shows their answer,

and then you bet on who's right, and you can like. Oh, okay. And it's cool, it's a fun game. Parks loves it. Did you play wits and wages? Oh, did you play? Did you wage or something oh yeah um i'm really good at the game so y'all will probably get wow yeah sounds fun i went four out of five

against my family no i've been playing this one game it's like it's really what game dave it's a plastic bowl and that has a bunch of bunched up. Why you got to do them like that? Do what? Why you got to do them like that? The dumbest game of all time. Who reads them? Why would I spend $12 on this game when I can make it in two minutes at home for free? Yeah, I have printer access.

Dude, we had no entitlement at Grand X to be like, we shouldn't do this. We were just like, okay, we'll do it. Like, stop. Okay, they're paying us i like i'm not proud of what i'm about to say but like i would i i needed the job at grand x so bad that like i would have done anything had it really come down to it i would have promoted anything i needed it i would have promoted heroin i couldn't go back to michigan with my tail between my legs just like leaving grand x i would have been tough i did do anything remember that remember we ran out of bottled water at that festival we put on? No.

I had to go down there to the Minister of Tourism. Oh, yeah, dude. I forgot about that. At Day Rage? Yeah, at Day Rage. Why don't we just get some from the camel? Don't they store water in their backs? In their homes.

They're lovely camel homes. Do they actually store water up in those, John? Yeah, that's what they're for. They're like tanks? Jill Johns. Yeah, pretty much, up in those, Johns? Yeah, that's what they're for. They're like tanks? Jill Johns. Yeah, pretty much, man. No, they're not, dude. They're not like golf course tanks.

No, we don't do those anymore. You can't just like stick a tap in there and turn it on and just get like fresh water. So how does it work? I don't know. Look it up, bitch. Think if you like sliced a camel's hump with a knife, it would just be like water flowing out of there? I don't want to think of that. Probably. Do you think if riding a camel like being on a waterbed?

Does a camel's hump hold water? A camel's hump does not hold water at all. That's what I was saying. It actually stores fat. That makes sense. A camel uses it as nourishment when food is scarce. Okay. So it's like water.

If a camel uses the fat inside the hump, the hump will become limp and droop down. A flaccid hump. Yeah, dude. Okay. Did you see Travis's hump, dude? Why have we been told that there's water in there this whole time? The camel, there's not a camel named Travis. There's not.

There's even a whole brand named Camelback for this reason. Sada. Well, it's something you need to live. And the camelback also, water is that too. You need fats, you need water. You don't put fats inside your camelback. I do. I get duck fat and I put it in my camelback

and I suck it through the tube just to get nourishment. Do the people at Camelback know that? Dude, I don't know if that, we should tell them. I'm going to send them a letter. Send them a letter and be like, hey, you guys might want to change the name of your company because they don't store water in their bags. Hey, idiots, you guys might want to change the name of your company because they don't store water in their bags. Hey, idiots.

Guess what? What if you put frats in your camelback? Frats? Yeah. Just at any given moment, you needed the boys. Yeah, I don't know, man. That's interesting to think about. There are always dudes in Michigan who would ski with a camelback on.

I'd be like, dude, it's pretty quick. It's pretty quick over here in michigan right now i don't know it's not that serious why wouldn't it freeze because it's in a insulated pack dog there's a hut at the at the top of every chairlift just like go get some water well like dude i mean if you know if you've ever skied in northern michigan you know that's a pretty quick quick experience like it's a quick chairlift ride it's a quick ride down i've always had those people who are total boners i mean i get it if you're in like colorado like, you're just trying to stay hydrated and you're going to be out there all day and you're just doing laps. But like.

What about festival people with camelbacks? Dude, I respect that. But I also, I don't like to, I don't like to pee at festivals. So like, I don't need to be overly hydrated. You just dehydrate yourself. Yeah, exactly. Like. It's really healthy.

The number one thing I don't want to do at a festival is have to pee numerous times. Yeah. I do the camel catheter. So yeah. So that way I can just, you know. I think if given the choice, I would rather have a camel catheter than a camel back at a festival. Man, that one time at ACL, I'd bought, like you can buy full bottles of red wine and it was like 98 degrees outside. I don't know what I was thinking.

I drank the whole thing. Did they headline that ACL?l that's good yeah nicolas jay was there the whole and his brother was jc jc jose dude that's in sync david same guy no it's not yeah it is you stupid stupid idiot some guy went over dude i'm sorry i think i'm i've got a problem man can i hit that camel back like dude i'd love to give this to you, but this is my pee-pee. Yeah. This is actually just my piss on my back.

It's hooked up to my... What if he was trying to get one of his frat bros to hang out with or something? Actually, here's... I've got a different one for that. You have two camelbacks, one with your pee

and one with your frat dudes. Yeah, one with frat bros. You just got to suck them out, and then there they are. Don't say suck them out. Well, that's how a Camelback works. Have you ever fucking seen one? Yeah.

Doesn't sound like it. I've never actually used one of those. I have. I've never had one. I have. It's a kind of nice sensation. Nice with it? Yeah.

I mean, it's a heavy flow of water. It's larger than a straw, so you're getting a lot of water with every suck. Yeah. Facts. Yeah. Okay. Cool, man. Dave, can you tell us what happened with this pilot?

Hang on. Dylan just sent me a link on Slack. No, I didn't. It's on my hands. Oh, it's relevant to the story. Oh, it's a different – it says it's bigchess.com. Oh, wait. Okay, that's different.

Why did you send me that? You're the horniest person in media. Bigchess.com? How old are you? Horniest person in media. How are you going to just send that mid-episode? He's not the horniest person in media. BigChess.com. How old are you? Horniest person in media. How are you going to just send that mid-episode? He's not the horniest person in media. Jesus.

Who is? Heat. Anywho. The dude that Chugs hangs out with that does the podcast with the OnlyFans girls. It's Dave or KJ. Barstool Stiffy. Dave's taking the title, I think. It's Barstool Stiffy for sure.

You're the one sending the links, dude. Quit trying. You're projecting right now, bro. I think the people at home know that that didn't actually happen. right here's a story for dylan this pilot i don't think he did anything wrong i need you guys to tell me um it says here british airways pilot admits to coke fueled romp before trying to fly and uh you know what i'm not gonna say his name because he's going through it. It's in the headline of the story.

You can probably say it. I know, but we don't need to put him on blast. We've got his text that he sent to a flight attendant who I believe he might have been involved with. But I'll read some background. The pilot partied his face off in Africa before trying to hit the skies less than 24 hours later but thankfully he was reported before that could happen and sadly fired too okay you guys tell me dylan do you want to read these i don't think i'll be the blue box you be the white box braces don't don't take that deal dylan i'm not i'm not i'm not reading this man

he starts off by saying it was very very naughty is this guy british she says tell me everything i hope it's even not here than well tell me when you realize that if this guy's british or not she says i hope it's even not near than us he says right get ready standard standard uh joe berg set. I assume that's Johannesburg. Bar, grillhouse, Tiger's Milk. Get chatting to this young Spanish bird and this Welsh chick who's about our age in the bar. End up sat with them at a table at Grillhouse and walking them down to Tiger's Milk. This sounds like a worse weekend. Tiger's Milk. Quick aside.

I'm going to start using bird for bibs. It's so great. Shout out Love Island. It's Sunday Bird for bibs. It's so great. Shout out Love Island. It's Sunday. Just get ready. It's Sunday, so it's not really that busy, but music, dancing, a few more drinks. At the bar, these two local lads who live in the compound, they take a fancy to Welsh, and she's very drunk, so I'm keeping an eye on her.

Obviously, ends up being shots and whatnot with these two lads obviously turns out they're absolute wasters but not bad people absolute wasters just drunks what does that mean gotta be drunks right british lingo they lose me sometimes um we all walk stagger back up to the hotel bar for one last one before bed Welsh and one of these guys is getting on very well but she's told him that I'm her boyfriend couple of drinks in the bar a bit of snogging and then we're somehow all on our way to this dude's flat Welsh has decided that I should actually be her boyfriend Spanish is hooked up with one of the two local lads and is having her i don't what does that say it's bleeped out t something ts sucked on their sofa tots they're they're made late night tater tots ah great choice yep we polished probably burn their mouth

a bottle of vodka at this place now and the girls are dancing topless i've lost my shirt somewhere and one of the local lads produces a plate with a few lines of coke so there's a debate about whose chest is the best to do a bump off not going to lie i may have started this with ulterior motives uh response uh from the lady babe that's wild or babes that's wild babes ribs he says that's the story of how i ended up snorting coke off a girl's teas in joeberg she says gotta say it's not my cup of tea yeah not a massive bucket list item for me either but one to tick off i guess anyway came to my senses a little and thought things were getting way out of hand decided to rescue the girls get them back to their hotel um we had some snogging, some shagging.

And then he tried to fly a plane the next day. And the person he was texting narked him out. Probably a good thing. Dylan, how long does it take cocaine to get out of your system? Oh, you think that's funny, Randy? I think it's funny making a cocaine joke at my expense like that. It wasn't a joke. I was just asking you.

I have no idea. I've never done coke. I don't know. I didn't know if you had chat GPT up and you could have just looked it up or something. Like, come on, player. He failed a drug test. Here's the thing. Here's the thing.

Like, this guy made a mistake well before, you know, getting fired. And his mistake was acting like any woman out there cares that he did coke off of someone's boobs like that's just not a story you tell to like some girl that you want to impress right yeah you shouldn't put that in writing i have an answer for you okay after last use cocaine or it's uh metabolites metabolites it's metabolites. Metabolites? Metabolites. Metabolites? Sure.

Metabolites? Why do you put emphasis on weird words all the time, dude? Just metabolites. Typically can show up on a blood or saliva test for up to two days, a urine test for up to three days. It's not that long. You know how they get a saliva test from you, right? They just say, click, click, pull.

A hair test for months to years. A heavy user can test positive on a urine test for up to two weeks. I mean, I don't think I have any drugs in my system that would really concern an employer right now. But if an employer told me they were going to do a hair test on me before hiring me, I would be like, yeah, I'm just not. You're in trouble. We're on different waves. Yeah. We're on different waves right now. Like, I just don't think we're I'm just not. You're in trouble. We're on different waves. Yeah. We're on different waves right now. I just don't think we're going to do that. You'll never work for the railroad.

As someone who once applied to BNSF, they do a hair test for everyone. Which I guess makes sense. It's the railroad. I mean, yeah. You show up, you're just completely bald. Like, what? There's a hair test today? What?

Wasn't that the rumor? Remember Brittany shaved her head completely? It's Brittany, bitch. Like 15 years ago, and that was the rumor? Sheney shaved her head completely it's britney bitch like 15 years ago and that was the rumor she shaved it because of a drug test i heard that the westlake kids at one point were bleaching their hair so that they couldn't get tested for steroids football team would that really throw through the test off i don't know that someone told me that that like one year all the westlake high school football team did bleached hair and they were like yes

because they were doing stair rides and they wanted to cover it up. I don't believe it. They were ripping the Southlake. Southlake did that bit. Southlake, yeah. I think the boys just wanted to go blonde. They famously have more.

Shout out Quinn Ewers. I saw the Anderson high school football team. They were all bleaching something else in solidarity with Dylan. Shout out to my Trojans out there. Mr. Trojan himself. That's right. I didn't win i did participate that's big dude yeah that's big that's huge even paul uh our running back who went to baylor played

football oh he won my year he graduated i graduated with him he was on the really really bad baylor team yeah not very good that's okay yeah we got a scally yeah great guy oh wonder what he's up to don't know look him up right now i don't think he's doing cocaine no i'm not talking about paul oh okay do you really care if your pilots do them blow and fly in a plane like wouldn't you want them dialed uh no i i prefer he didn't do cocaine I've seen hijack enough at this point that I know that I need the pilots to be on the same page and, you know, not scumbags. Shot to hijack, though. That one pilot was kind of a scumbag.

Luckily, Idris was there to neutralize the situation. Dude, how about Idris showing up in extraction, too? All I'm saying is that if I was on the plane in hijack, it wouldn't have gone that way. Really? How would it have gone down? They probably would have crashed the plane into something. We all would have died. They just threw you out of the plane.

I had several questions about that flight, but we can save that for a stream room coming to a Patreon feed near you. Instead, let's talk about our friends over at Squarespace. Today's podcast is sponsored by Squarespace, and I love Squarespace. Squarespace is the easiest place to build your website. It's the easiest place to build your business. Squarespace is an all-in-one website platform for entrepreneurs to stand out and succeed online. So whether you're just starting out or you're managing a growing brand, Squarespace makes it easy to create a

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When you're ready to launch, go to squarespace.com slash steam to save 10% off of your first purchase of a website or domain. Squarespace.com slash steam to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. And I have to say, it's quite easy to purchase your domain directly through Squarespace. Go check it out. This is a story from last week that we didn't cover, but given the close proximity that we have to what's going on here, I just think that we needed to maybe talk this out briefly. Dylan, how does your Apple watch smell these days? Oh, I don't have it on right now. Pretty, pretty sour is probably the word that best describes my watch band. Well, Otsego County in Michigan, the northern part of Michigan. I've only skied at Otsego one time. I had a ski meet there at one point, but I bruised

my tailbone in the meet earlier that week, so I couldn't participate. Okay. Have you ever bruised your tailbone? I don't recommend it. Not fun at all. No, I bet that's not fun. Well, last week a woman was rescued from an outhouse toilet after she climbed in to get her Apple Watch and she got trapped inside of it. Ooh. All right. They heard someone yelling for help and they removed it and the woman was just in the outhouse.

She got stuck in the house or in the toilet? I think she got stuck in the outhouse. She gets stuck in the house or in the toilet? I think she got stuck in the toilet. Every time I see the toilet lions, the golf course, you know the toilet I'm talking about? That's right by the tee box. You fall in that thing, you're not getting out.

It is so deep, so far from the toilet rim to where the water is. It's like 10 feet. It's crazy. How did they get through the limestone? It's like a well. Yeah, that 10 feet it's crazy how do they get through the limestone it's like a well yeah that's a good question how do they get through the limestone i don't know just the state police made a statement that if you lose an item in an outhouse toilet do not attempt to venture inside the containment area yeah that's common sense just let it go what would you like honest question like an Apple Watch for me, I'm not going in to get an Apple Watch.

What level do you need to reach in order to get into something? Oh, yeah. I have this thought anytime I use a port-a-potty, the outhouse on – right before the par five. It's the par five, right? Yeah. The one that went down the hill. Oh, number eight. Great hole.

Golf hole. Golf hole. Number eight. Yeah, it's a par five right yeah the one that went down the hill number eight great hole i'm always number eight yeah it's a good golf hole i always get worried about losing my cell phone at or getting my cell phone stolen out of my pocket at like music festivals and stuff but even when i go into a port-a-potty at a music festival i try not to be on my phone because i don't want to drop my phone in it is scary you go back pocket with it yeah like it's just it's it's such a scary i don't I just don't want to do it. Yeah. I don't know if there's anything that I would drop in that I currently own that would cause me to freak out and go in there. It's like pulling your phone out on a chairlift.

I always freak out when – I get really nervous. Yeah, but if you drop it on the chairlift, you know that you can at least like maybe find it. Maybe. Maybe find it. It might sink down into the snow. You have no idea how to find it. It's true. It's true.

It's definitely a risk. Do you think her watch band smells better or worse than your watch band? Ooh, probably much, much worse. Do you think she's still wearing the watch today? She got it. I assume she got it. Like you don't go in there and not get it, right? Yeah.

Yeah, she wears it. It's just not worth it. If you go on a mission like that and you come back empty-handed like i don't know if i can look like you know like rosie's eaten poop about three times in her life and i've witnessed it like i can't look her in the eye for like a day no it's like you're not mine if sally came back from like a music festival with the girls where she fell into a porta potty like i'd be like maybe i'll sleep on the couch for the next like couple days you can have the bed i'm gonna have to burn the mattress i'll pay for the hotel room yeah man the sorriest prank of all time is pushing over a porta potty when someone's inside

it you've seen videos like that that's so sorry i was driving the other day and a dude hauling porta potties jumped out in front of me on the mar like turned oh no and he turned so aggressively in front of me that i had to slam on the brakes and i was like dude if one of those porta potties goes down like i mean i guess it's not in there i guess is it the liquid like the liquid stuff i don't know i don't know man like do the camels store poop in their humps well come on man we already got past that i saw steve-o get inside of a porta potty and then get slingshotted up into the air in it yeah that sounds right it happened it was a good one it was it was funny it was

disgusting um but like dude if i'm bent over and like my croquis snap and my coast is fall down in there i might get in and get a dotted but like if it's like my maui gyms or something i don't care that much but my coast does get down there, the polarized ones. Yeah, dude. God, Costas had a minute back in the early 2000s, man. Dude, I was actually – I was at fucking Lala last year, and I was doing a shoeie in the Port-A-Potty, and I dropped my fucking New Balance in. And so I fucking had to go in and get it. I only do them out of Sperry's. Really? Yeah.

So you were doing a shoeie by yourself. Dude, I actually like how the New Balance fabric makes the beer taste more than i like how my top siders do like how all that stank from the spare he gets in there yeah yeah dude it's a nice it's a nice scent leather and sweat did you have a question i was just thinking about you doing a shoeie by yourself inside of a porta potty yeah like dude i don't know dude like i don't i don't like to make my shoeies like a display for everybody. Like, it's more of like a personal journey for me. If you know, you know type deal.

Yeah. I-Y-K. Y-K. Right. Every person that does shoeies has vocal fry. Yeah. Or at least 99%. I'm going a i'm gonna make a espn style graphic that just says that what these 10 year olds do they stole their mom's car do you ever think of doing that when you're little when you were 10 how far do you think you could have gotten in a vehicle that you stole?

Two blocks. Dylan? At 10 years old? Yeah. I'm comparing that to where Parks is right now developmentally. He's eight. I thought he was seven. He used to be, and then he had a birthday.

Okay. Yeah. I could cruise for a while, I think. I'm not getting on the highway. I'll stay in the neighborhood. You think you can make it 200 miles? 200 miles is fucking insane. If this is the 10-year-old in the picture with the face covered up, that's a large 10-year-old, I feel like. Yeah, it does look like a large 10-year-old.

I can't tell if this 10-year-old is partially standing up on the floorboard or what. as like partially standing up on the floorboard or what. But yeah, deputies stopped a 10-year-old boy and his 11-year-old sister driving on I-75 in the city of Alachua, Alachua. I don't care. Don't text. Shout out to all the Alachua backers, though. Around 3.50 a.m. Thursday,

the car had been reported stolen out of Northport. During the traffic stop, deputies were surprised to see the 10-year-old exit the car on the driver's side. They'd been reported missing. And yeah, they were about 200 miles away, about three hours from home. So they basically drove Dallas to San Marcos.

You have to respect them, right? Really impressive. Like you have to be mad at your child but you also have to be like i'm really impressed you actually made it this far without getting killed yeah you think at least it's like a you know a crack they would get pulled over for for not using a blinker there's a number of things you can get pulled over for um how do you know they were using their blinker dude i'm just saying there's no way i don't think i used a blinker till i was like 25 i'm a i'm a very i over blinker what a dork

i need people to know where i'm headed i'm gonna turn left right here dude i just hate people that don't use blinkers so much that i can't i can't be that guy i can't be i can't be a hypocrite in that that sense when you're at the the stop sign right out here and you're waiting for traffic to clear and a car comes up and they kind of slow down and then they turn their blinker on with like five feet left you're like i could have gone yep you gotta put that on like 100 feet ago yeah i would have gone yep yeah yeah i i don't like i don't like it when people don't use the blinkers. I married someone who's not very good at using a blinker,

and I have to remind her sometimes, like, hey, blink a player up. Brooks Koepka famously over blinker. That's the Adderall. Oh, okay. Different kind of blink. We're going to need that one ready to rock for the Ryder Cup, by the way. There's a lot of things we can run back for that. That's it.

I wouldn't make it very far. I once, when I was four years old, I put a diaper on. I drove across the country and I killed someone. Oh, fuck. You're admitting that right here. You're four. Statute limitations. Yeah.

Try me as a minor, bitch. Okay. Please don't. Will gets locked up in juvie please don't please don't 37 year old will how old are you 36 about to be 37 in january you know daddy's got a big birthday coming up is that you are you daddy i am okay we need that clip because you've got a feet finder mug in it. Yep. Yep. Bust those feet out. It's time for this weekend in fun presented by our good friends over at Early Bird.

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while they do make me feel good and they are fun, they also help me sleep like a rock. I notice such an uptick in my good nights of sleep when I'm rocking the early bird. I'm doing early bird most nights of the week and man, my sleep is goaded right now. Whenever I turn someone on to early bird, which has been several people, whether it's via the podcast or whether me just talking about it, everyone always comes back and says like, that stuff is awesome. Thank you so much for recommending this. I absolutely

love it. It's based in Austin, Texas. They were our first ever sponsor on this podcast. We absolutely love these guys. They even walked into the studio day one and we're like, here you go. We want to be the title sponsor right now. Let's do it. Go get yourself some early bird, earlybirdcbd.com. Use backer for 20% off your first purchase. Yes, that's backer for 20% off your first purchase at earlybirdcbd.com. Dylan, what are you getting into? Ooh, thank you, Will. Friday, I got parks.

Don't know what we're going to do yet. Going to take him out to dinner, maybe go see a movie or something fun. I don't know. How about you show him a classic Chris Farley movie? You know what? I want to show him Happy Gilmore next. I said that. I know.

I know. Will you hat tip Will when you put it on? Yeah, I'll say, hey, shout out to Will who recommended this one, Parks. Yeah. My Saturday or my friday yeah probably chill parks saturday he's got another soccer game want to know already so different from last season they they pulverized the team on saturday it was like i felt bad for them he's got some athletes don't feel bad dude he was like his team last season was getting their asses kicked like you

should be pumped he's's really competitive, man. He does not like to lose. Man, I wonder where he got that from. Hates to lose more than he likes to win. He does, man. Who doesn't? He's cut from a different cloth. My Saturday after his soccer game, I'm pretty wide open, actually.

I don't know what I'm going to be doing. There's a football game at 2.30 that I'm interested in, Texas-Kansas. Watch that somewhere. Is that here? It is here. That's good. Watch that somewhere'm interested in, Texas-Kansas. Ooh, watch that somewhere. Is that here? It is here. That's good. Watch that somewhere, and then, I don't know, pretty wide open. So if you guys want to holler at your boy, if you see him in the streets,

my phone will be all charged up, ready to go. It'd be messed up if I saw you on the street and I just didn't say a word. Just look the other way. It's like, damn. See you at cockfight. Sunday's also open, man. I don't have parks Saturday or Sunday, so I got gotta find something to kill kill the time with i don't know we should do a ghost a ghost crawl bar crawl go omni bar driscoll bar yep cockfight cockfight

we'll drink a 40 outside of bill's billiards or whatever it's called and then we'll just piss ourselves in front of the Paramount. Sounds great. I'll bring the diapers. Y'all want to link up at some point? I could maybe sneak you a link. This is my last weekend of freedom. You're on baby watch. I can't really...

Let's sneaky link. Or just like... I don't know if I can be that far away from my wife for very long this weekend. I don't want to take you to Acuna or anything. I just want to hang out. I don't want to go to a baseball game. Second time Acuna's came up this week.

It's a border town in Mexico. I thought we were talking baseball. It's very shady. Yeah. You don't want to go there. It's the border town. If you get some boys, like, oh, we're going to Acuna tonight. You're like, I'm not going.

But no one's done that in probably 10 years because it's very dangerous i might go okay they haven't been in 10 years i'm worried about the that's donkey show territory scene what's that boy getting into i find some cocaine down there too yeah probably some fake cocaine and acuna it's the name of uh zach bryan's next album cocaine and acuna yeah not bad not bad um man i was just checking out the uh draft king sportsbook line on this t-state southern miss game uh cats on the road laying five and a half i kind of like it over uh 62.5 or 62 and a half when i put it like that yeah i got him at six. Do an in-game parlay? You got it at six?

Yeah, I got them at six. Oh, wow. Okay. Yeah. I'm going to watch some football Saturday. But unlike the last two, maybe I'll get out and go watch it. I don't know. What's the weather?

When's it cooling down? I should know this, but I have not been following. We're looking at low 90s on Saturday. Sunny. Okay. Okay. Is there a big game Saturday night? I'm putting you on the spot.

I don't know. Okay. I feel like there is a good one. If there's a decent game Saturday night. I know we got Ole Miss-LSU. I don't know if that's Saturday night, though. It's probably not. Yeah, I don't know.

Is Ole Miss even good? Ooh, Brett. Front Street. Yeah, I don't know. Is Ole Miss even good? Oh, Brett. Front Street. Yeah. I don't know. We'll see. I mean, fall is welcome to arrive whenever it's ready. Oh, buddy.

Sunday, I got soccer practice. My son's, not mine. That would have been so sick if you joined a soccer team. I've been playing indoor. I do think about it when I go in there and see guys playing indoor. I'm like, that does look fun. Indoor was the most fun I ever had playing soccer. It's exhausting.

It's so. It's the most tiring way to play soccer. Yeah. You're just sprinting. Yeah. It's all offense. Yeah. And it's just, it's just get the ball and just go score.

The hardest. The hardest I've ever breathed is always during indoor soccer for some reason. I'm not built for it. You can't cherry pick as easily. That's my game, you know? That's it. That's it. Yeah.

I'm a baby watch, so, like, you know, I'm just going to be kind of maxing relaxed and all cool. I will not be shooting any b-ball outside of school, though. It's still quite hot in Austin, Texas. Thursday night, I'm going out to dinner. I've got some friends. We've been trying to plan a group trip for, like, two years now. And we've kind of got the ball at, like, the five-yard line right now.

And I think we need to run some plays and try to get this ball across the goal line. Sports. Okay. And so we're going to dinner with this couple we're going to hammer out this plan doing a long weekend so i'll put on the pto calendar for you guys to know february next year um then i don't have much going on i think there's a little booty chatter about uh me seeing michael weiner and his daughter this weekend maybe we could sneaky link you can't all right i just talked about sneaky linking with you i know i don't really know the situation on weekends what are you talking about you never want to hang out with me on the weekends i hang out with you on weekends you hang out with your brother-in-laws or fucking

my micah the family the family you're, oh, I'll see Dylan Monday morning. Whatever. That is kind of facts. Like, I do see you like all the fucking time, dude. But we don't hammer beers together. Notre Dame Duke Saturday night. The Dukies. Who gives a shit?

It's a good game. Coach K, dude. The hot ass quarterback. Throw out the record books when Coach K's on the field. He's not on the field. He doesn't coach anymore, and he never coached football. I tried to tell y' you how hot that guy was. No one wanted to listen.

Yeah, you undersold it. Coach K? You don't have a way with words. Sam Hartman, Notre Dame quarterback. You were calling him Sam Hartman. That man is an absolute problem. I was talking to Big Hemsworth game the other day, and I still think he's the hottest dude on earth,

but the Notre Dame quarterback is one of those dudes, when you see him for the first time, you're like, what? Movie star. He's got it all? He looks like a movie star. It's like he's playing. It's like Taylor Kitsch. He's playing Notre Dame quarterback in a movie.

He's a young Taylor Kitsch. His beard is doing really well, though. The hair is luscious. Friday night, we've got Utah, Oregon State. That's a nice little battle there. Wow, dude, the Beavers. What's the sound a beaver makes? That's it. You got it.

Yeah, pretty good. Randy, what are you getting into this weekend? I'm texting. He's a good looking guy. I was just looking him up. I had no idea what he looked like. Sexy, right? He's beautiful. He's a beautiful man. I don't really know. This is like my first weekend in like two months where I don't have know. This is my first weekend in two months

where I don't have to travel and stuff, so I might just chill and relax. I'll probably go out to the bars Friday. You're going to do gaming PC, and you're going to do a little garden work, I think. I built my gaming PC two weeks ago. I've yet to even get to use it. Maybe I'll play some video games.

Let's go to Cockfight. Cockfight. Cockfight. yet they even got kids to use it so maybe i'll play some video games let's go to cockfight no yeah cockfight cockfight everyone's going to cockfight it looks like a cool bar from the outside it does it does i'll go with you sometime probably not this weekend no it doesn't sound like i'll see you in november maybe we could drive a certain car there oh more than that later people look out big stuff coming up oh we finally got the cock mobile yeah we got the wienermobile let's get out of here it's been fun bye Thank you.