Circling Back - GIFs & Couch Cushions

Episode Date: March 27, 2019

We discuss how to properly pronounce the word 'GIF,' Will turns on The Steam Room to discuss his couch cushions (or lack thereof), and Dave takes us down memory lane with his scummy middle school sports coaches. We also do This Weekend In Fun and devolve more than we've possibly ever devolved before. Support us on Patreon and receive episodes every Friday for just $5 per month: www.patreon.com/circlingbackpodcast Harry's: www.harrys.com/circlingback Rhoback: www.rhoback.com (code CIRCLE20 for 20% off) Twitter: www.twitter.com/circlingbackpod Instagram: www.instagram.com/circlingbackpod Visit: www.circlingbackpodcast.com --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/circling-back/message Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

all right we're back circling back podcast wednesday my name is will to freeze to my right dave ruff i have a question i'd like to pose to you, gentlemen. Pose it. I'm ready. Is the gym the ultimate place to hear this phrase when you're leaving? All right, see you later, boss. Because I feel like every gym, when you say bye to the people at the front when you're walking out, they hit you with a boss.

Nope. That has never happened to me. Today, it happens often. I'm not saying that you're wrong by any means. I think you with a boss. Nope. That has never happened to me. Today, it happens often. I'm not saying that you're wrong by any means. I think you're actually correct. That being said, the reason I said nope after you said that is because no one calls me boss. And I don't want that.

I didn't know anyone was doing boss anymore. I think it's a gym guy thing. I think it's slightly condescending, and I don't like it at all. Boss, chief, bud. Those are bad. Kid. I do man quite a bit. Those are all condescending for I don't like it at all. Boss, chief, bud. Those are bad. Kid. I do man quite a bit. Those are all condescending for sure. Man's fine. I don't know. What about

pro? That is the worst. It's so douchey. Pro sounds like hockey guy talk. Thanks, pro. We have an acquaintance, a golfer acquaintance who says that on Twitter all the time. It's the worst.

And I just want to clap back and be like, dude, stop saying pro. I feel like hockey guy's bud. Yeah, thanks, bud. Who is the golf acquaintance? My nemesis, John Peterson. Oh, yeah. Okay. Pro's just not cool.

But what are you going to do? What's up, Dylan? There's my intro. What's up,'s my intro thank you so happy to be here what's up bro the lights are off in the studio it's kind of sexy in here i'm feeling it it's a beautiful day outside i'm vibe it's gorgeous windows in here it's warm and sunny and clear and it's great no sometimes we just do our podcast in a pitch black room but in here it's dark and sexy we're dealing with that natural light like we're bringing it back to college you know what i mean dave you know i'm saying right that ain't it you know i'm saying campbell i'm also just in a really good mood because it's

don't match play week and i'm so excited to get out there just the energy in the town you can feel it right well eldrick's in town so that's big the energy though he brings energy with him you know it's funny he's in town and um the big cat stuff just keeps popping up on our radar i can't escape it did you see i think i showed y'all the instagram yesterday what was the town that's about an hour and a half west of here maybe west of san antonio we were talking about i think you said you'd been oh Oh, Concan. Concan? Garner State Park is in the area. Yeah. That mountain lion that somebody found on their game cam? Beautiful out there, by the way.

Yeah. I highly recommend it. The Frio River. That means cold in Spanish, Dave. That's a place you don't want to go by yourself. What does river mean in Spanish? River is Rio. So it's called...

The Frio Rio? Never mind. Is that what you're going for why didn't they like that's a way tighter name yeah yeah yeah that's that's a tight name it is quite cold as well where i was going with that was just that there's a big fucking mountain lion out there at least one there's been a mountain lion spotted on on our property out at a ranch before they're out there dog not they're out there they'll get you actually they won't i think they're pretty scared of people for the most part man i don't know i'm not gonna test them no i'm not i'm not gonna run up on one i'm just saying um if you do come across one you're

probably gonna be okay they say don't run because then it immediately triggers that your prey it's gonna chase you down oh shit you square up to them like all right dog yeah honestly they say don't run because then it immediately triggers that your prey, it's going to chase you down. Oh shit, you square up to them? Like, all right, dog. Yeah. Honestly, they say don't turn your back to it. I heard we were... That makes sense. I was listening to a radio program this morning.

I quote tweeted this guy. Somebody's cam found this cat and the debate was, is this a bobcat or is this a mountain lion? This is in... This is north of dallas not that far north like 45 minutes and um essentially the status quo was that yeah this is a bobcat but it's a big fucking bobcat it's like look like it's about 50 pounds which i think they don't

normally get that big but it's like bobcats don't really scare me but i wouldn't want to rosie on a heavy day i don't want to deal with that no you don't really scare me, but I wouldn't want to run. It's like Rosie on a heavy day. I don't want to deal with that. No, you don't want that smoke, man. This is how we got into Paul Goldschmidt talk last podcast. I know. We're pretty much just redoing Monday's episode. Do we go too heavy on the big cat stuff, the predatory cat? It keeps popping up organically, though, to be fair. I'll be honest.

You kind of did this to yourself, Dylan, when you brought up Tiger again, which is how we got on it last time. Well, I brought up the golfer tiger woods i know this is that's exactly how it started on monday okay okay we're kind of pot committed at this let me make let me make this promise if we don't cover if we don't cover a big cat story that makes national headlines people are wondering i know like what's wrong with us we're gonna put our money where our mouth is where hot little mouths are uh we will make some merchandise with some sort of cat on it this is dave putting his money where his mouth this is i'm in no way committing to this i'm gonna talk to my guys okay and we're

gonna make this happen okay are you are you sitting crisscross applesauce right now dave i am okay because it's a little bit warm and i'm wearing shorts and i don't want the uh the sticky on the you know i'm talking about where your skin sticks to the leather of the seat? You're airing out the boys. Is it Saturday? No. Some people could be listening to this on a Saturday, though. And as they know, Saturdays are for the guys.

Hopefully it's exclusively a group of guys listening to this. Yeah. That's the goal. Well, you can't have a fan on in here because it would affect the audio we might end up with like a i don't know a country station yeah coming through on the rascal flats baby yeah man there's just something about the energy in the town when dell's in town you know pretty amber michael you know michael Dell's out there shaking hands.

Tiger's out there yucking it up. Our boy Taylor got a photo. Did you see this photo on Instagram? No. Tiger photo bombed him and his boys. Oh, really? Yeah. Shit.

They're out there right now. They got that VIP access. I think they're sales guys, real estate. You know what they do. Yeah. People that are out there on Monday and Tuesday are just flexing. Because one, they're like,

yeah, I work a cush enough job to where I can take Monday and Tuesdays off or at least come out here for work. So that's like a flex in itself. And then also they get the total VIP access. It's tight. I'm very jealous. I'm going to put Wednesday and Friday up as 1A and 1B of days to go. No.

Yeah. You'd rather go Wednesday than Thursday? Because it's the first day of the tournament. Yeah, that doesn't... I feel like the matchups aren't as good. Whatever. We've got to do our bracket. That being said, yes.

I'm glad you mentioned that, Dave. Fantasybracket.pgatour.com If you go to that before the tournament starts, which there's a very limited time between when this episode drops and when the tournament actually goes, you can join our bracket group. It's just circlingback, in parentheses, at circlingbackpod. I did that so we could get some maybe overflow followers.

I love overflow followers. If we get five followers out of that, then totally worth it. But go join it. There's over $300 worth of rowback stuff up for grabs. Shout out to them for the quick turnaround on that. They're just the best. I might have hit them up last night, and they responded like 15 minutes later. Yeah, the bracket was up.

Our bracket group was already made with no prizes in order, and then all of a sudden we had a great little gift package. Well, there was a prize, actually, that you put out there. It was me FaceTiming some random person. You have to do that, too. I'll do it. You have to do that, too. Just creep somebody out.

Yeah. They're not affiliated with the golf tournament, but they are also partners of the podcast. Our friends over at Harry's. Yeah. We're Harry's boys. You already know. Yeah.

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i'll be honest i kept my eyes on the laptop because i saw some weirdness going on i have to bring it up because i i'm in shock still um it's a little warm in here granted and dave is i think beginning beginning to uh perspire a little bit uh the typical move is like taking your shirt like grabbing you know the mid like chest area with your you know fingers and popping and just kind of popping it i've been doing that get a little airflow inside the shirt i do it we all do it um something you don't see too often and i move the dave just pulled as he did the same thing but but with his pants. Shorts. His shorts.

He took his shorts, he grabbed his waistline, and just popped it out a good, I don't know, 8 to 10 inches. We're all friends here. If you walked up to him and got kind of a bird's eye view of what he was doing, you just would have seen peace. This actually happened to LeBron a few years back, and everybody watching on ABC saw his peace. You don't see that.

But here's the thing. I have a wall behind me. Y'all are sitting down. There is no risk of y'all catching a dong shot. No, and I had my eyes on the prize. I'm not opposed to catching a dong shot. Do you guys have any sweat tricks that you do? Sweat tricks?

Yeah, to avoid sweating or air out. No, I don't. It's our new segment. It's called Sweat Tricks. Yeah. This is 100% a segment right now. No, I don't. I start sweating first on my lower back.

That's where it gets me first. That's how swamp ass develops. I don't get swamp ass, though. Can I issue just a little bit of a response to what you said? You're correct, but I want to just set the stage here. Not to brag, but I came right from the gym. What? Specifically.

That's gross, dude. The outdoor pool is now open at our gym. I was out there today, sir. I caught some laps. Oh, fuck. How many laps did you do? It's what, like a 25-yard pool? I don't know.

You're getting laps off, dog? I believe it's 25 meters, Dave. Meters? I don't even know if a meter a yard is longer. I didn't do a lot. I think they're very similar. I probably did about a 30-minute seshi but i wasn't going swimming the whole time i know that's a shocker right how was this a sweat trick where's where are you going

with this long story short i got some sun so my skin is a little bit warm that's good so if you see me over here popping man just let me go i was i was drinking uh at a bar on the fourth of july one year and i didn't and i was pouring sweat because it was a really hot day out and i went to the the stall of the bathroom and i took some toilet paper and i patted my face down because i was so hot oh no i didn't look in a mirror before i left i walked back out and the girl's like what's on your face and i had little specks of toilet paper and i told her i was like oh i just patted myself down and didn't even look and she's like yeah you need to get rid of these and i was like all right thank you i'm gonna leave you gotta head right back to the bathroom she was cool about it she wasn't like i wasn't like embarrassed or anything but it was just like oh man what an

idiot move i knew dudes in high school who when we would go out they were big guys like o-lineman types and they would bring towels just with them to to go out to like the little 18 and up club oh yeah sweaty guys yeah i've seen that move Dude, when I said I was pouring sweat because it was really hot, this was Michigan hot, so it was probably 80 degrees outside. If I was in Texas, I probably would have moved. At least when you're in Texas, you're not the only one sweating, obviously. There's very few people who just do well in the sun, in the Texas heat, and they don't sweat. Everybody's kind of got it.

So if you see somebody with back sweat, it's like, eh, that's the realization you have to get over. That's what sweat all the time. Once you stop caring, you almost start sweating less. Yeah. I used to get very nervous when I was golfing because I'm a swamp ass boy. I used to get very nervous golfing that somebody would put the cart on the side of me where they could look at my ass when I was hitting my shot and it always bothered me and it would be in my

swing thoughts like are they looking at my butt right now you mentioned that to me before when i parked on that side now i don't set up now that i like i'm down with the squad i don't care but at one point it was like a definite swing thought for me is like are they looking at my butt right now you used to be down with the sweatness though. Yeah. Down with the sweatness. That's gross. I'm not above like using like the free rags at the golf course. It's just like

wipe myself off real quick. Wait, where? Wipe yourself where? Like if I had got like chest sweat and shit. Oh, okay. All right. That's okay.

What do you mean? You sure that's it? What were you thinking I was going to say? We've been talking swamp butt. We've been talking swamp butt. Go down your pants with that. No, no.

I'm not going to do that at a nice place. You know, a lot of these guys on tour, Tiger specifically, he changes shirts mid-round. Trust me. If I was sponsored by... I guess I'm sponsored by Roback now. I should just be doing that. That's not a bad move. I might start changing shirts at the nine.

Dude, that's actually a really good move. It's almost getting to be Dylan doesn't play golf season because it's getting hot out there, folks. No, we're not even close to that. We've had one month of golf weather. Late May. How many rounds have you played this year? Late May. You played like three times.

So two months from now. Okay, shut up. It's getting to be. I've got to play a lot of golf the next few months. You're jumping the gun, you loser. You almost called me something else. I almost called you a P. You can't say that.

This isn't the patreon oh yeah that's right no cussing man wow we got a good episode hey do you want to have a debate real quick yeah that's why twitter was on fire this morning because dictionary.com tweeted that the word spelled capital g capital capital I, capital F, was pronounced with a soft G. Yeah, the argument behind this has always been the guy who created... We're saying Jif versus Gif. Yes, the guy who created the term, whatever.

The file type? Yes, that guy. He came out and said it's a soft G, as in Jif. Yeah, he created it. I reject him. Why? I reject Dick. Wait.

Just because you come up with something? Yeah, no, this is how it works. You don't get to decide how it's pronounced. I think you do. You 1,000%. Unless it's named after yourself. Dude, if I'm fucking around in the woods and I find a new species of snake, and I want to call it the, oh, I don't know, the D-man, we're not going to call it the uh oh i don't know like the d-man we're not

going to call it the demand some people can't just say that it's the d-man it's not the demand they will air to me because i discovered it the demand is correct here it is an acronym so the first word of the acronym is graphic with a hard g this guy can't just change the rules there's no set rule that the first right there's no. There's no rule, but it doesn't make sense. There's already a GIF in the world. It's a peanut butter that was around long before the fire type.

That's where the J. So? People don't know that when you're saying it out loud. Hey, bud. Look at me. Look at me in the fucking eyes. I'm looking at your stupid...

Dave, this is not Patriot. Sorry, sorry. Hey, did you take geology or geology at Texas State? I'm just curious. Which one did you take? Do you play golf

or do you play joff? I play both. Really? Yeah. Because I just refuted your stupid little... Wait a minute. This might actually go against your argument. Doesn't golf stand for gentlemen only something?

I really think that's a thing. Gentlemen only, ladies forbidden. I thought that was a wife's tale. That's definitely not what it stands for. Hey, did anybody ever put that on a t-shirt? Just curious Moving on Yeah I don't know man

I reject dictionary.com I reject a guy who Well then Merriam-Webster decided to come in First of all You know what who's more official dictionary.com or Webster I don't know I think I trust dictionary.com Merriam-We Webster is the gold standard

of the English language, Dave. Who is Webster? Who is this person? They've been in the dictionary game for centuries. Why don't they own the domain then? Why don't they own Dictionary.com? It sounds like they need to get their business right. Dictionary.com is some website that started, I don't know, seven years ago.

Here's the deal. If I want to read about climate change, I'm going to go to science.com or climatechange.com. Not, you know, whatever other.com. When I was a kid, I would go to boobs.com. Merriam-Webster is the gold standard. We all know that. When you want to see, never mind. I reject this whole thing.

Merriam-Webster does have double the Twitter following, but that's all semantics. It doesn't actually matter. It's GIF with a hard G, and you can't change my mind. No, it's not. Yeah, it is. I'll be honest. If this went the other way, my entire argument would be, I don't care. I'm not going to switch now.

Yeah, but instead, Dylan has some stupid argument where he's just writing off a dude who revolutionized the internet. How long is this stupid argument? How long has this even been around, this kind of file's say 20 years i'll check the facts maybe 20 30 years it's so new that it doesn't matter to me all right it's not like i've been i'm mispronouncing a word that's been around since the inception of the language the initial release of a gif was 1987 what a great year who was using a gif back then well probably you you're probably in the early classes oh come on you know i did it i was a i was a toddler

basically i was six months old you're a todd do you even know what like do you even know what the second two words stand for interface Interface. Graphic interface. Functionality. I don't know. Freakily. You're just not right after the word graphics. How about you tell me then, dickhead? Graphics interchange format.

Okay. Otherwise known as a GIF. A GIF. I feel like there's a lot of problem. You know what annoyed me about this too, but I think you might have done it for a reason, you know what annoyed me about this too but I think you might have done it for a reason is that you responded to the tweet with a gif one a trump gif one you you are the noted person saying that gifs are the crutch of the unfunny correct thank you that's true and then you used one in this. I enjoy a good GIF every now and then.

There's some good ones out there. But it is... What's your favorite GIF? People who rely on GIFs to be funny on the internet are unfunny people. You're allowed one. It's a crutch. Let me say this. I think you should only be allowed one per week on Twitter.

That's generous. You can't hold me back. I would get one per month. And I'm a generous guy. I'd never use them. Here's my favorite one. I've used them sparingly, but I rarely use them. I'm going to give you guys some time to come up with your favorite GIF or GIF.

People who over GIF, they're stupid. Let me say this. They're stupid people. It's laziness. Mine is from Caddyshack. It's on Funny. It's Judge Smells, and it's the well. We're waiting.

We're waiting. You hit me with that, I'm going to laugh. I may not even acknowledge it, but just know that I smiled when I saw it. You know what I'm talking about, right? I do, but I want to... Have you even seen Caddyshack? Yes, I've seen Caddyshack. What about you?

I have it on DVD. Don't insult me with that question, David. Have you seen Caddyshack? Yes, I've seen Caddyshack. It's kind of your era. Get the fuck out of here. That is a good one. You're kind of like the Denunzio of this podcast.

No. You're the Sm uh smells whatever his name is he's tfm what's your favorite one no not smells i'm thinking of that what's the grandson's name oh spalding spalding not not judge smells yeah you're spalding that's shithead wear that stupid hat get out of here no i'm uh riding dangerfield's character i get no respect. That's pretty good. Keep going.

Thank you. That was good. Dennis Miller yesterday. Dennis Miller yesterday. Dangerfield today. I tell you, I get no respect. Richard Pryor tomorrow. I'm going to stop while I'm ahead.

What's your favorite GIF? I can't wait to get you all Christmas GIFs this year. Shut the fuck up. The problem is, it's also very close to the word gift so if you say jif you're just cutting out any confusion you're making it easier for the person receiving your communication i just think extra crunchy peanut butter i bought you guys about four minutes what's your favorite one my favorite gift dude we've asked you a million

times people are screaming right out with it dude. Oh, God. I have so many. You just have to name one for the content here. I don't know if I can pick one, Dave. Hey, Will, do you want to participate or do you just want to fart around? I'm sorry, man. That's a loaded question. It's not a loaded question. I feel like later I'll think of one that I really do like more than this.

But the one that always just kind of makes me smile a little bit and nod is the one of the dude who clearly just like body bagged someone and is doing the face wipes. Oh, yes, yes, yes. It's just good. It's an all-timer. And the one that they have on loop where it's just constantly happening, it's just a really good gif. You could even say eye roll guy or eye open guy. The blink guy. Blink guy.

That one was so – that's a great, great gif. So worn out. But people just ran it into the ground. If you're still using that, you're catching a mute button from me. People ran it into the ground way too fast. But it was great. There are so many GIFs out there that are just so overused. Okay.

A lot of GIFs overused. I agree. What is the movie with Tommy Lee Jones? Is it The Fugitive? It's the I don't care, and it's just him. He's got his hands, and it just says, I don't care. That makes me laugh. I love the kingpin one.

Oh, Bigger McCracken? That's the best one. Oh, no. I'm so scared. That's the best one. That's a classic. That's my favorite one. I take mine back.

You can shut down somebody's tweet with that. That's so good. That's the Jif version of this ain't it tweet. Yeah, it's a shut it down GIF. This argument's over. It is just really, really good. It's so condescending. There's some other ones too that are just like really overused.

A lot of office GIFs. The guy with the hand on his chin. Like, oh, you know that one? Oh, it's from The Wire. Is that from The Wire? It is. Where the camera kind of spins around his head? I didn't realize that was Wire.

That one's overdone. I believe that's Wee Bay. What else? Lesson learned. I feel like there's some Jonah Hill ones. We should just go through all of the GIFs. The guy who got body in a rap battle, he does the purse lips as he looks away. Oh, that's... That one's really good.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Conceited. Yeah. I feel like that's Dave's gif. I agree. Whenever I see that, I'm like, Dave would like this right now. Yeah. Dave would appreciate this.

Well, that was fun. So we came to no conclusions about how to pronounce this word. Yeah, it's gif. We decided. We gave you 19 minutes. Now, what's your favorite? I mentioned three fantastic ones just now. Yeah, it's GIF. We decided. We gave you 19 minutes. Now, what's your favorite? I mentioned like three fantastic ones just now. Dude, chill out, Dylan.

Can't you feel the energy from the match play? There's some really good Obama GIFs. He's got some good reactions to stuff. Yeah, from the guy who's dropping Trump ones. We saw your Trump one. We know what you're up to, dude. Look, Trump is good for content, if nothing else. Let's be honest.

I could use... And that's political talk with Dylan. I could do without it, but yeah, go on. No, I've said all I needed to say. Just admit. Just admit what you said before this podcast about the wall. Stop, Dave. I do not speak on politics.

Remember we did this? Remember on our previous podcast, we did segments about The Wall? Yeah, the best show ever. Like the actual executive produced by LeBron James, weirdly. And now he has that new show called The Mile. I haven't seen that one. It's like you have a mile and you win a lot of money if you get there, but you have an athlete chasing you.

And there's like obstacles, think it looks awful i mean it sounds tight i'll probably be all in on it let's let's just tell the truth hey should we should we uh fire up the steam real quick oh shit are we serious you don't have to do that because you're going to add the effects afterwards. Get over here, Dave. Stop. You're a little bony-ass. I don't like how you talk to me. Is anyone steaming on anything?

Great time to ask. You're the one who's steaming, I think. I'm low-key. I'm feeling good. The energy in this town is popping. I was steaming on jiff. In order to do this, just to get the logistics correct, I need to pull back the curtain a little bit

and say that we are recording this on a Tuesday, not a Wednesday. Yeah. Okay? But you're hearing it on a Wednesday. That being said, I'm now on day eight without couch cushions. Do you know what that feels like?

No, I would never put myself in that position. I don't think this is far-fetched for me to say that this is literally the worst eight days of my life. I would rent couch cushions while my other ones were being cleaned. So, when I posted a photo saying that I was getting my couch cushions cleaned, somebody justifiably said that it was an all-time flex.

Because it's just not something you do unless something goes really, really wrong. wrong and frankly something went somewhat wrong yeah you normally just flip them rosie had an issue that's that's what i'll tell them who rosie is rosie is my dog um she had a decent sized p on one of the cushions that's what they say about you we don't pop each other with towels every time a joke is made we're still in the steam room bitch i know but you can no so enjoy the steam has been having this bladder issue and i've been keeping her off the couch but when i got in the shower one day i didn't keep her off the couch and when i went there i was like oh it happened And so I was like, you know what? I can either let these cushions sit around until I can bring them into the person

or I can bring them right now and just nip this in the bud, get out of here. Brought them in. She told me I could pick them up Friday. I was like, you know what? I can go that time without any couch cushions. It's not ideal, but I did. And then I had the realization that I'm the biggest dumbass on the face of the earth. Yeah, we already knew that, though.

Yeah. That I was doing it over March Madness. So I had to sacrifice Thursday and Friday sitting butt deep on my couch just chilling because Rosie did that. Had I known that, I would have kept the clean cushion and just kept it on one side of the couch and just watched it. But I wanted to get everything cleaned all at once because if I'm going to do it, I might as well just do it all at once. Why is it taking so long?

Dude, that's what I don't get. That's why you're steaming. The person cleaning them is only open from noon to five. And I'm like, man, imagine how much more cleaning you could do if you were open normal business hours. Those are terrible hours. What about people who actually work nine to fives? I'm worried that I'm going to get a phone call during this podcast because when I talked

to her on Friday, she said, well, I think they'll be done at the end of the day on Tuesday. Well, does she know you're steaming? Well, guess what? It's the end of the day on Tuesday. No, and I can't tell her I'm steaming because she's a really nice older woman and she's so kind about it. She even apologized. Like when I like what a steaming mean when I when i opened she probably knows what that means when i opened

her call and i started talking to her she was like she was like i have really bad news and i was like oh what did you ruin the cushions on this couch and she was like you're not gonna have your cushions for the weekend and i was just like okay that's not like really like when you say really bad news i assume you ruined my couch but here i am and now it's just like it's killing me man i didn't realize how boring life is when you don't have a couch how have you been enjoying your uh premier league games well in bed the only good part about this entire thing is that the premier league took an they had an off week last weekend and so i I was fortunate in that. Wow, good. That's great, man.

Wow. So when are you getting them back? I don't know, dude. I don't know. Mainly what I want from everybody is not their sympathy, not anything like that. I just want your prayers. Wow. Not to flex, but I would have just bought a new couch.

Well, so I went to this place near where we live that sells furniture, and they had this sale going on in this little warehouse, and they had a couch that was about half the price of what our couch originally was. And part of me was like, this couch is way doper than our couch. What if I just sold our other couch and just bought this one instead? I need a new couch. I think Sally would kill me. My couch sucks.

I didn't realize how expensive couches were. How could you not know that? I think one of my original steams was about how long my couch was taking to get made. Dylan's couch has cigarette burns in it and shit. No, it doesn't. It's just a cheap couch. Does the homie eat a lot of yogurt? Because when I was over there, there were a bunch of white splatter stains on it.

Dude, come on. Let's not do this. Dude, you can't bring my son into a cum joke. You can't do that. Yeah. Come on. What's wrong with you? I was just asking if he ate a lot of yogurt.

I don't know. I'm going to choke you with this towel instead of pop you with it. Has he had ice cream yet? Are you kidding? Didn't you not serve him ice cream for a while? We held out on soda for a long time. What's his favorite soda? I don't really know.

I heard he likes that new orange vanilla Coke. I heard that's what he likes. I low-key want to try that, just to say. Dylan got a Diet Coke at lunch the other day. One, you got a Diet Coke at lunch. Two, you got the gas up by the century from the waitress. I did. She made my day.

We didn't even talk about that. We were sitting at Matt's Hill Ranch. We'd been sitting down for 30 seconds. we were there at 11 in the morning it was thursday and we were watching some march madness we just got a pot off i believe yep and we decided to have an early lunch with the crew the waitress comes up and she just looks dylan dead in the eyes and just says i just wanted to come up and say that you're one of the most handsome men I've ever seen. I was sitting there like, what? I was totally caught off guard. She made my day, first of all.

But I was just like, oh, my God. Thank you. I didn't know what else to say. But, man, that was a great day. It was also the day I almost got hit by a car at Luby's. Big day for me. No one's doing Matt's El Rancho to Luby's. No one. It's really unfortunate

that I've never seen her before. Because if she worked when we normally go at night, she's got the busy times, then she would be a key hookup. Because that's a tough bar to get a drink at when you're waiting for a table. Yeah, it is. And I would utilize you to get drinks. I love her.

I don't know her name, but I love her. If Dylan needs to be my shameless piece of man meat that I whore out in order to get margaritas faster, then so be it. Yeah. I will be that person for you. You're our little whore. Ah, come on. Come on, Dave. I can't believe Will made that semen joke.

You're our little whiskey girl. Grow up. Stop running, Dave. i'm not running i'm sitting right here inside i know this podcast i'm well aware i'm well aware that like my like state my steam rooms are often like very first world like problems and stuff but like at the same time like it's kind of just who i am at this point and so i'm sorry but like just imagine just imagine that you have one comfortable place to watch television, which I do a lot of, admittedly. I watch a shit ton of TV.

You have one comfortable place to do it besides your bed, and you can't do that for over a week. It's not great. Man, speaking of steam room, you know the picture I put on Twitter that demonstrated how that man was laying inside the steam room? Yeah. I still can't get was laying inside the steam room. Yeah. I still can't get over that move he was pulling.

His sack was up against the wall. You just don't see that. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Okay, I meant to ask this, but it's tough stomach. That's how I imagined it. I was imagining it flopping over the other side. I guess so he had it down. Well, his thing was hanging down, pointing back at his stomach.

Set the stage here. There might be people who didn't see this photo. So I was in the steam room, the actual steam room at Lifetime Gym last week. And this older gentleman was in there with me. He was completely naked. He was laying on his back. And his legs were up on the wall. Like flush against the wall.

I've never seen this before. But he was doing it. So his butthole and his sack were sweating all over the wall i've never seen this before but he was doing it um and like so his like his butthole and his sack were like you know sweating all over the wall right and his piece was just hanging pointing back down like a stuff it was just weird do you think maybe he was training for uh trying to get the flexibility to give himself the satisfaction no i just think he was the maryland manson getting a little stretch in at a very inopportune time um why not just do that with shorts yeah because it would still be i've i've

kind of come around on uh what around i've come around on people doing like stretches in the steam room or in the dry sauna it makes sense it's the it's the principle of hot yoga you get more flexibility it's not that weird to me. But they're also, the people that I see doing it, are doing it in shorts. So I don't have to look at their sack and then wonder, like, where's the piece? Oh, there's the piece. It's on his stomach. I know I shouldn't be looking in the first place, but it's just you want to know what's going on.

I feel like I have a right to know what's going on in the steam room. It's fair to sneak a glimpse when something like that, something weird like that's going on. It's fair. And we all know you're always checking it out. You should have posted up right next to him. I check people out. I should have what? Posted up right next to him.

And done the same thing? Yeah. You could have gone butt to butt with him. That's just a weird scene in there, if that's happening. Did you check out Earl Thomas? He was just shooting baskets. Did you check him out, though? I checked him out.

What's that J look like? I saw him shoot about three threes, and he missed all of them. But his J looked pretty pure. Was it wet? It was fairly wet. Again, he didn't make any, but it looked pretty wet. Okay. You know who has the low-key wettest J in this room?

I'm talking about your boy right here. No, no, no. It's me. No, it's me. Dude, I'm not even kidding. I had the best J in Austin whenest J in this room? I'm talking about your boy right here. No, no, no. It's me. No, it's me. Dude, I'm not even kidding. I had the best J in Austin when I was in high school. I don't know.

I've only played basketball with you once and it didn't end well. It's weird because you didn't actually play on the basketball team in high school, did you? I played freshman year. Absolutely, I did.

I did. I believe you. If you're allowed to rep your freshman year, then I'm allowed to rep the fact that I made A-team in seventh grade. I scored like,

I think I averaged like 13 a game. Which is respectable. How many boards? I heard you weren't the dude who crashed the boards. No, I didn't crash boards. Were you boxing out at all? You never followed your shot. I was a cut. I cut to the rim a lot. I'd drive and I would just rain threes on motherfuckers.

Like it was my job. I heard you played in one of those leagues where they didn't have a three-point line. There were people in town. What the fuck? There were scouts in town saying that I had the wettest bounce pass of, like, anyone that they've ever seen. A bounce pass is never wet. You had the wettest bounce pass.

I had the wettest bounce pass. It's not wet. There's no such thing as a wet bounce pass. What is this? Dude, it was hitting you in stride every time. No, it wasn't. Every time. That's not true.

Every time. There's so many NFL guys up there. This is a good transition. actually it is dave you what what why because dave wanted to talk about his coach from uh elementary we'll mention a team i had a tweet last night that's on micro watch um i tweeted this because there's a lot of controversy you know that remember that guy we almost signed a couple weeks ago SVP Scott Van Pelt yeah he issued like he had a little segment

where he talked about the Tom Izzo thing you guys saw this where Tom Izzo just fucking tore into one of his guys yeah and people had

opinions all across the board whatever I'm not here to talk about whether that was you know a good thing or a bad thing but I will share my experience with a somewhat similar circumstance. I tweeted last night at dcarterruff on Twitter and Snap for the record.

You've got to change your Instagram. Well, it's doing pretty well right now. I'm going micro. I've gone micro many times in the last few weeks. I never had a coach humiliate me during a game, but I did have one tell me he'd put me on the A-team if I hooked him up with my college-age sister, which I feel was in poor taste.

It was in poor taste, yeah. When I tweeted that, as soon as I tweeted it, I was just like, someone's going to come at me and be like, this didn't happen, or I'll take things that didn't happen. I'll take things that didn't happen for $500, Alex. But it 100% happened. You've told me about this before and uh i'm not gonna at the coach because you know whatever i'm surprised nobody commented with like shoot or shoot or something i was waiting that needs to end well can i ask a question everyone's wondering

this is basketball not football for the record did Did you get on the A team? No. So you didn't hook them up. Damn, dude. I was not worthy of the A team. I was significantly less skilled. Yeah, but they might have needed a role guy. I heard your J was trash back then. I heard your bounce pass was shit. I was a kid in the box score if you checked it.

It was about five or six points a game. Yeah, the book on you is you couldn't bounce pass for shit. Yeah, we were throwing a lot of bounce passes back then. No, this is in seventh or eighth grade. I think it was probably eighth grade. And Duncanville had two, I guess that's junior high, two junior highs. There was Bird and there was Reed. I went to Bird.

I was a Bird nerd. And Duncanville's a good basketball town. They won state this year in 6A. Shout out to the Panthers. And, yeah, I wasn't on the 18th. Mark that bingo spot on your board out there at Packers. Please do. Yeah, this same coach is the same guy who he also coached.

There was a lot of overlap. So some of the football coaches coached basketball same guy who uh he also coached there's a lot of overlap so some of the football coaches coach basketball um he was a wide receivers coach and there's some uh some guys he would you know they were his guys and he would let them dip in eighth grade and i always found that to be a little bit weird the dip he would give them dip like they would go out to his truck with them which is also weird that can see you turning the other cheek and being like yeah I'm just going to ignore the fact that they're dipping but to actually provide the dip is not the move I've got another football story

my high school soccer coach he would allow me to not run the three mile loop we were supposed to do before practice sometimes and he would just drive me up with him in his truck and I'd just get to chill he knew I hated it that's some bitch shit if you're sitting up top as a striker for some of the games you don't need endurance you just got to fucking put the ball in the net

it me wow will the striker yeah you look like a striker i played a lot of defense i thought you were a goalie because didn't no no we've all seen your skills, man. Fuck you. Oh. Holy shit. I have another story about a high school coach. Can you not tell it while you're flexing your biceps right now? I'm not flexing. Keep flexing.

It's working for me. Chill. Why has this been so... Yeah. We're not on your couch. It's a weird play. It's just the energy. There's an energy in the town.

You can feel it. Crazy horny right now. So senior year, I did not play football senior year. Shocker. I just had to focus on golf. But you're a D-tackle. No, man. Somehow they didn't need a 5'9", 135-pound D tackle at Duncanville.

But a bunch of my friends did play high school football, and they were borderline going to miss the playoffs, and they had a game against either Grand Prairie or South Grand Prairie. Remember Rhett Beaumar? Oh, yeah. He was a quarterback in our district. He ended up at – did he go to OU? He went to OU.

Well, they had a big game. I don't fucking know what you're talking about right now. They had a big game against one of those teams, and it was a home game. And it was going to decide you win and you're in, right? To get the team, like, ready to go, the coaches staged what I like to call the ultimate high school false flag. They did graffiti, bringing back the tagging thing from yesterday. They wrote, like, Duncanville stinks or duncanville sucks we're gonna beat your ass they spray painted like the

field house did they write sandemus high school rules they basically made did like the most lame shit talking and then framed it and then said it was them and like so when the uh the football team came into lift in the morning they saw it and it was it was them. And so when the football team came in to lift in the morning, they saw it and it was supposed to get them going like, oh, dude, what the fuck? We got to get ready to play. And then they admitted after the season, like, yeah, that was us. That was the coaches.

Oh, my God. That's so lame. How lame is that? That's so lame. To be fair, they won the game. So the ends justify the means. Machiavelli said that. Damn.

Yeah. That's sorry. You know why I quit that basketball team in seventh grade i could name a number of reasons feed you the j enough chicks i joined the ski team instead because there were girls on it it was the lamest quit of all time wow man i feel like that's not really why you left the team. It was. At least it was factoring in. I doubt that. I didn't like playing basketball that much. All my friends were on the ski team and they got to hang out with chicks all the time

because the teams would practice together. I was like, man, this is tight. Dylan in college, his little apartment and his buddies, they were called the ski team. We never knew why. God, come on, man. What?

Y'all just keep body bagging me. Is that what the white was on the couch? I just want to be y'all's friend. Dude, quit going back to the white thing. I can't believe he did that joke. No one's doing that. Rosemary's going to hear that. Sorry, Rosemary. You're hear that. Sorry, Rosemary.

You're not sorry. I'm partially sorry. Do people know Rosemary? That's my mom. I know. I've said it before. Well, just to be clear, I wasn't... You missed one episode of this podcast.

You might be lost forever. I can't believe that I'm having to clarify this right now, but you know that I was meaning it was your... Yeah, I think he got that. Yeah, I get that. I wasn't saying it was the homies. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's too far. That's too far.

Biologically speaking. He's a tiny child. Yeah, yeah. I wasn't making that joke. I'm sorry. No, I mean, I got the joke. Yeah, I was talking about you. No, I guess, again, I get it.

I actually wasn't even going to go there. I was just talking about something else. Oh, you were just talking about like actual yogurt? Yeah. Oh, okay. Yeah, I got some at home right now. I showed wasn't even going to go there. I was just talking about something else. You were just talking about actual yogurt? Yeah. I got some at home right now. I showed Dave. Are you still eating that trash-ass Icelandic yogurt? It's called Skur, sir. He does

get yogurt. No, I'm not. Does he? Yogurt? He's crazy with the yogurt, man. What's his favorite flavor? Watch the sugar. That's all I'm going to tell you. I get him. I get him the good stuff. I like being the guy who doesn't have a kid, so I can just judge people on how they feed their kids. Dude, you just telling Dylan to watch the sugar on his kid's yogurt

is the smuggest thing in the world. Will's trying to deflect from the cum joke he made earlier. Yeah. I take plain Greek yogurt, and I add Danin or whatever you're looking at here. Yoplait. I don't know how to say it. The one that starts with an F. Fage?

I think it's just... Is it Fage? I don't know. I don't know. Isn't it F-A-G-E with an accent? I honestly always said Fage. Anyway, I don't know what you're talking about. Does it have the two little dots above the O or whatever?

Or is that... You don't talk about... Look, I get plain, and I add some local honey to it, and it's delicious. Like Dave said, be careful of that sugar, Playboy. I know what I'm doing, dog. Don't you worry about me. You know the local honey thing for allergies is complete bullshit? Oh, yeah, I know that because I've tried it.

I have, too. Yeah. Is it bullshit because it hasn't worked for you is it just bullshit no it's it's i've looked this up it's absolutely bullshit really yeah it's not that does not work that's upsetting i think you would have to have like i'm upset daily amounts a ton of honey per day to like build up the immunities. Just like a gallon of honey. Alexa, please play I'm upset because this is wild. Do you do that? No, I mean...

Because you don't even have allergies. No, I'll be honest. I've tried. Every time... I did nothing. Well, whenever I buy honey, I would actually buy local honey just because...

Which, it's not a bad thing to buy local honey. Like, that's still... I still support local. It's cool to support local honey. So the bees are... Dylan supports the local honey. So the bees are from Austin? Like local honey. Like, that's still... I still support local. It's cool to support local honey. So the bees are... Dylan supports the local honeys. So the bees are from Austin?

Like, local honey? Dylan loves to sell some local honeys. Yeah, they live down in Rainey. The bees reside in Austin. You know a few things about some bees in Austin? I don't even know

what that means. Wow, Dylan really is just catching all the... What does that mean? Bees in Austin? What are you talking about? It could have been, I don't know,

a number of things. Beautiful babies. Oh, hell yeah. Did you see Morgan Freeman turned his ranch into just like a bee sanctuary? Good for him. Where's his ranch? I don't know. That's the real story here.

It's in Austin. Wasn't he in Me Too territory at one point? He did something weird. Isn't his wife like 80 years younger than him or something ridiculous? She's not two years old. It's disturbing how much younger she is, two years old it's like it's it's disturbing how much younger she is i believe i'm looking at so i'm looking at it's weird it was weird no i'm there was an interview he did with uh it was like on like letterman wasn't it on

letterman he did like a weird he said maybe he did it there too but there was a noted interview he did so noted that i can't recall who it's with but uh and he was saying he was like being creepy old man times a thousand to this chick interviewing him what are you seeing will as i call her a chick so i'm being problematic too i apologize um i don't i honestly don't know i know it's something sketchy wipe it too he wiped the internet morgan freeman young wife did he he might have wiped this oh okay this is this is the headline you want to see morgan freeman had affair with his step-granddaughter okay yeah yeah that's ringing a bell step-granddaughter though but i mean the fact that she's young enough to be a granddaughter of sorts.

Oh, man. Yeah, so I'm going to take back. Will, dude, stop showing us pics. Dude, this is disgusting. What? What are you seeing, player? Okay, there's so many layers on this fucking idea right now. Do we need to take a break and just let you digest this?

Do we need to just not talk about this? Okay, well, one, just seeing the photo of the step-granddaughter makes it immediately creepy. Like, if she was 35 and he was 80, like, that's still weird, but it's not as weird. Seeing the photo, it's weird. She looks young, is what you're saying. It's fucking creepy. But it says, before she was murdered, Morgan Freeman's step-granddaughter told her... Whoa, whoa, whoa, time out.

She got... Okay, hold on. I told you. This onion is massive. Don't just gloss over the murder. She got murdered? Before she was murdered, Morgan Freeman's step-granddaughter told her boyfriend-turned-killer that the actor had been secretly sleeping with her,

confirming years-old claims about the illicit affair, according to defense lawyers. Do you need a tinky break in order to decompress after that? I just don't know if we should keep going on this topic. Yeah, I feel like the energy in the city is doing one thing and this story is doing another. Honestly, Alexa, play I'm Upset by Drake. This is too much for me. Okay, first of all, let's be clear. There is no Alexa in here.

If there was, I'm Upset would be playing right now. Someone on Twitter said that when I did that joke one time, their Alexa actually started started playing that song in the room how funny is that that's truly hilarious i hope i hope it happened well that's what happened when like some south park episode they were doing like an alexa episode and it was just turning people's alexas on non-stop and i'm almost positive that's why they did it dude imagine being named alexa and then all of a sudden this alexa is is born and like you got to deal with this this thing the rest of your life. Yeah. Didn't you date somebody named Alexis?

I did not. From Texas State? Don't do that joke, Dave. Yeah. Maybe it was in my bowling class. No, I did not date Alexis Texas. Oh, okay. If that's what you're going for here.

I'm just asking the questions. Speaking of keeping that thing on you. She thick. I told just asking the questions. Speaking of keeping that bang on you. Is she thick? Is she dummy thick? Yeah, Dylan, is she still doing it? Still doing what? Porn?

What? I don't know. Many of the questions I wanted to ask are kind of moot now that I know the young lady has tragically been possibly molested and then murdered. I wanted to ask are kind of moot now that I know this the young lady has tragically been yeah possibly molested and then murdered yeah let's just say she was she of age when I it didn't say and I don't know if I want to I'm not going to reopen that tab I'll put it that way

is it is he assuming there was no um let's just ask the question assuming everything was consensual I don't and there was no age like under the age the question that everyone's asking. Assuming everything was consensual, and there was no age, like, under the age of consent. Okay. Assuming that, that this is on the up and up, as much as such a situation can be. Is he beloved and old enough to where people are just going to give him, like, the treatment that the late, great President Bush, the original senior,

got where it's like, ah, he's just old. Sweep that under the rug, guys. Yeah. No, I don't think Morgan Freeman's on the same level. I'm not canceling him, necessarily, but I'm not going to give him a pass here. He doesn't have old man face yet, like H.W. had. Well. You know, like the rickety, like, can't really close his mouth old guy face?

Yeah. I get it. The really unfortunate one. How old do you think he is? Morgan Freeman? I'm going to say 81. 78. 81.

Really? How about Dave? How about the brain on Dave, huh? Yeah, big brain boy, huh? You know, that's kind of a party trick I've got. You can name, like, anyone, and I can guess their age. Like me with heights? Yeah, it's exactly like that.

I've never gotten one wrong. It's crazy. Yeah. How tall am I? Yeah, it's exactly like that. I've never gotten one wrong. It's crazy. How tall am I? You're really good at height. You're 5'11". Big height guy. You're 5'11". Dave's 5'9". I'm 5'9.5. I'm 11 and 3 quarters.

Trending to 6 feet. I flirted with 5'10". You're sneaky close to 6. I'm so frustratingly close. It stinks. Why don't you just tell people six? Like, if we were to put you on the roster, we'd list you at six, right? Get one of those. I do.

I honestly mostly tell people I'm six. Get one of those OU spine elongators. Don't even bring up. That they all have. Don't even bring up OU right now. What's his fucking tweet yesterday? It was the worst tweet I've ever seen in the history of Twitter. Whose?

Baker Mayfield. Oh, my God. What is he doing? You know what? Turn the steam back on. Hold on. Get the steam on. He pivoted better than anyone's ever pivoted.

Dude, that is such a bad look. First of all, people who complain about airlines on social media, just stop. I hate that in general. But if you are someone like Baker Mayfield, a public figure who has tons of money, and it just comes across as like we deserve, me and my people deserve more respect and better treatment because of who we are than just the regular folks out there. Just this morning, I got a phone call from Sally. I thought it was weird because I thought

she should have been working. Sally called me and she said, hey Will, my flight just got canceled Sunday night back to Tulsa. What other flight should I get on? She didn't call me complaining.

She didn't call me crying. That is a regular person problem that happens all the time. Literally all the time. Just because your fiance is bacon-made food, you don't deserve special treatment. Can I read the tweet

for the folks at home who have not heard it? Yes. Hey, at American Air, my fiance has her bachelorette party this weekend and y'all canceled her direct flight. Dot, dot, dot.

Changed her ticket and seat. Dot, dot, dot. It's no longer nonstop. I'm not sure how y'all do business, but I'm pretty sure this isn't how it's supposed to go. Dot, dot, dot, dot. And, all caps, without a go. Dot, dot, dot, dot. And, all caps, without a refund,

dot, dot, dot. Too many dot, dot, dots. Your lips is crazy. Dude, you're Baker Mayfield. Just fucking fly her somewhere. What are you doing, dog? Get her a NetJets account. Does he not have a stupid shit head?

I don't know. He doesn't have PJ money. He's still on that rookie deal. He doesn't have PJ. Ooh, that's pretty favorable. Browns are going to be good. Browns are going to be good. Browns are going to be good. But he's a dumb dickhead.

So I'd said it. Nah. That would have been a bad look. What I like and respect about Baker is that he didn't just post that and then turn off Twitter. Because he clobbed back at people. And he said, hey, American Air. Because obviously if you at someone first, then it doesn't show up on everyone's timeline right so you can you can add them if you want yeah while keeping it somewhat off the books

off the out of the public eye but he wanted to make a spectacle out of it well that's the point you want people to to respond and then to have to act because i see so many people expecting people to come to his support so this guy t Posnanski, who's like a political humorist or something, I don't know, I apologize for not knowing, says, sorry your fiance gets treated like every other human being. To which Baker responds, actually, I'm the one saying

something, Tony. Dot, dot, dot. Get lost. If I can take care of her, I'm going to. Is that so hard to comprehend? Chivalry is dead in your eyes oh god which i love how he spun that that is how you spin that's terrible uh then colin coward got involved i can't always lost his mind i'm out when colin gets involved i'm out on colin did i tell you all that i'm out on colin and i have been for a while i went through a big

colin coward phase i would watch his show every day. That's depression. Dude, Baker Mayfield body bagged him, remember? That interview they did before the draft? Oh, he did body bag him. Yeah. Colin Cowherd's canceled. Yeah, he got canceled that day. Man, it's been a fun episode. So Baker's just bringing back chivalry.

Yeah, by grabbing his nuts on the sideline and shit. Yeah chivalry. By grabbing his nuts on the sideline and shit. Yeah, that guy's trash. By doing the Dougie every opportunity has. What's he doing? Dude, if I could hit a Dougie like him, I'd be hitting it all the fucking time. Does he not get embarrassed of himself? Does he not look in the mirror sometimes and just think to himself, like, man, I'm a huge tool? Hopefully he's a little bit self-aware.

He's not. I've never seen someone be so talented something to have such a chip on their shoulder so unnecessarily yeah just be good at it and be cooler being really being really good at something and not like being cocky or like douchey about it is way cooler than being the guy with the chip on your shoulder you can be i don't know man you can be cocky without being a douchebag though a lot of people can pull that off. He can't. Who's more electric, Pat Mahomes or Baker Mayfield? Oh, Pat.

Are you kidding? He's got the arm, dude. I mean, I said who is more electric. He's got the arm. He's got the no-look patch. He's got a doper haircut. I mean, are we comparing them as their OU careers? Pat Mahomes was a Red Raider.

You thought I... Oh, yeah. That's okay. Sorry, dude. I was thinking of... No, no, no. It's okay. I'm sorry.

You're thinking Kyler. I was thinking Kyler. It's not your fault. I'm sorry. It's not your fault. Mahomes, dude. Give me Mahomes, dude. Mahomes.

I just said electric. Mahomes, dude. He's more electric. I know, but Baker's a content guy, which I respect. Dude, I'm sorry. Pat Mahomes... I love Mahomes. Pat Mahomes has become... And I'm not a Red Raider guy by any means,

he's become my favorite player to watch in the NFL. He really has. I know that nothing I say after what just happened, that mix-up I had, I know nothing I say holds any weight anymore. That being said, if there is a Chiefs game on, Pat Mahomes has officially made it a must-watch. He's so fun to watch. If I'm flipping through and I see on CBS at 1 o'clock

that the Chiefs are playing, I'm stopping on that game. You know what he can do, Dave? He can throw a no-look pass in a game. He can really spin it. Okay. He can really spin it. He's going to spin it, Jim! He's going to spin it!

Did old white ESPN personalities just wear out the no-look passes by just showing replays and talking about them all the time? It was just so overdone by the end of it. It was overdone, but I don't think I've ever seen that before. No. Yeah, you don't see it. There's not a lot of guys out there who can spin it like that. Yeah, he can really spin it.

You know what I mean? Where did this joke originate? It's just my favorite cliche, like scoutism. It's just funny. guys with big arms can really spin it like which is weird because you can really spin it but you got noodle arms oh i can really are you kidding me dog you know i got a cannon i can spin it dave i know i'll spin it there am i what um uh what else we wait no i was just the i had a point with that i There we go. What? What else? Wait, no.

I had a point with that. I did not care for Baker in college, but now I do care for Baker. I still don't stop to watch Brown's games. He's still a dickhead, but he's a very talented dickhead. His dickheadiness is so dickhead that I don't even stop to watch games because I don't like him. Do you think he's all head or do you think there's some shaft there? He might be low key all shaft.

All hat, no cattle? He's definitely overcompensating for something. Yeah, dude, he's a walk-on, bro. He's more of an Apple TV. He's not really. I know. He's more of an Apple TV remote than an ATT U-verse remote. No one has set a better narrative that isn't really exactly true than him.

You receive a scholarship to Texas Tech, right? He was on the team and then decided to transfer as a preferred walk-on or some shit. Isn't that how it happened? Yeah, and they like to say that he went up and introduced himself to Stoops. Like when he walked on campus. I know he was playing intramural ball the year he couldn't play. Stoops was like, yeah, I know who you are, man. You just came from Texas Tech.

Stoops plays it like he didn't know who he was. I've heard him in interviews. Like he was completely shocked by it. Whatever. Yeah. I guess so. Yeah, and Stoops really planned on retiring too. I'm sure nothing weird went on there.

Yeah. Oh, yeah. We see ya. This is a segment we do. It's called speculation. Pure speculation. It's called yeah. We see ya. This is a segment we do. It's called speculation. Pure speculation. It's called hyah. Hyah.

This weekend, hyah. Anybody else you want to just completely shit on? Dude, I told you. The vibe in here today, it's just crazy. We've got to talk rollback first. It's just stupid horny in here. What? We're past that.

He's not wrong. It's just the energy. He's not wrong. Today marks the first day. Well, I mean, tomorrow does technically. Guys, we're recording this on Tuesday. You know this stuff by now. But you're going to be seeing a lot of us wearing Roback at the WC Dell match play.

Not only are we big fans of their polos, quarter zips, performance shirts, and hats, we're just a fan of us wearing rowback at the WC Dell match play. Not only are we big fans of their polos, quarter zips, performance shirts, and hats, we're just a fan of the brand itself. And they're just good dudes.

You know what I just did? Hey ladies. You know what I did before I came to the studio? What to the studio? I literally don't

know. What did you do? I took all my rowback shirts out of the packaging and I put them into my laundry so that I wouldn't be crease

guy on the golf course tomorrow. Whoa. I didn't want to be the guy with just rocking creases on his shirts. Okay. So I'm going to wash them all tonight so that I got a fresh slate. I got about five to choose from for three days of golf. I might bring a shirt change. I'm going to do it.

Part of my excitement about this tournament is I get to wear a rowback every day. Yeah. It's stupid comfortable. It's performance fabric that's light, but it feels light, but it's low-key thick. I just look extra handsome in their shirts, too. They fit really well. It's like Peter Millar for dudes that are not fat old dudes. But if you are a fat old dude, you can wear it, too.

I'm a chunky young dude. Just size up. Yeah. I like the collars because they don't wrinkle up on you. I think they say bacon collar,

but these are just they stay in place. They're bad boy collars. And if you want to pop it because Will's a big collar bop guy, you can do that too. Dude, I love how you

might start popping my collar. Keep the sun off the neck. Yeah. Where can the people support these nice folks? If you go to rowback.com that's R-H-O-B-A-C-K.com,

and type in Circle20, you get 20% off of your purchase. Circle20. Circle20, baby. 20% off. That's nothing to whatever at. And I think if you hit some minimum, you get free shipping, too. Just do it. Tweet your order at us.

Just do it. When you get your stuff in, hit us with it. Yeah, we would like to see the orders. Hashtag SuperSage as well so he can see it. Speaking of SuperSage, do you know what time it is? Is it time for This Weekend in Fun? Yeah. I don't have the audio of him doing it, but it's This Weekend in Fun.

Did we lose that? Yeah, it's somewhere. It's presented by Eisenhower's on Rainy Street. The only place to go. We stay flexing there. Might be there tonight. I just said I might. I said I might.

What? Tuesday? We sure we don't want to delay for Thursday when they have a band? This is huge news, Dave. I will be there on Thursday. Either way, whether you're in town for a bachelor party, bachelorette party, long weekend with the boys, or you're just trying to have a drink on a Sunday afternoon

while some oldies play from the, what's that band called? The Night Owls. The Night Owls. I almost called them the Wombats. I don't know why.

Yeah, they really slap. Eisenhower's is your spot. Head down to Rainey. Make it your first spot. I guarantee that you're not going to want to leave. Dylan, start us off.

I'll kick it off, as always. So, I mean, today through Friday, we'll be out at the Dell Match Play. Yeah, we have a nice little five-day weekend going on right now. Yeah. No, that segment's over. Yeah. Yeah.

Oh, yeah. That's got to be reoccurring. It's too much fun. So, yeah, I'll be at the tournament Wednesday, Thursday, Friday. And then Friday evening, the homie and I are departing for the ranch. Big, big family weekend out at the ranch. Got some extended family coming in. I've never been more excited for a ranch trip.

You know how much I love it out there. Be careful out there. Why? Oh, because of the big cat situation? Big cats and dude, also, it's fucking snake season oh yeah dave people on my next door my next door app is filled with like people at the park and that it's there's a big thing of rocks and there's just like a giant rattlesnake chilling of course badgers are out there too man i'm not really was as worried about the badgers i feel like they would leave me alone

they're they're feisty little fuckers they're feisty like i don't want to get in the cage you Of course, Badgers are out there too, man. I'm not really as worried about the Badgers. I feel like they would leave me alone. They're feisty little fuckers. They're feisty. I don't want to get in a cage. You don't want to scrap with one. No, that's going to be a five-round fight. Anyway, that's my weekend. It's going to be an excellent weekend. I'm on cloud nine right now.

What you got, Dave? With what? What are you doing this weekend in fun? Oh, yeah. Dumbass. Man, I don't know. I'm probably going to be recovering from this week. I'd like to play some golf.

Might play golf with intern Klein. If he's listening to this, which I think he will be, please make it tee time. I will play golf with you. Is the person who sends the text about playing golf, do they immediately take on the responsibility for making the tee time? Yes. So if we don't have one, if we get boned on that deal, it's on him.

That's my biggest rub with Klein. He always presents these ideas and then puts it to you to plan them. He doesn't execute. Hey, let's go to dinner tonight. No, he makes tee times. Then he's like, okay, where should we go to dinner? Yeah, but I'm fine. I would actually rather plan a dinner and have someone else plan it for me.

But he makes tee times. Have I called him out for this before on this podcast? Yeah. Well, we've called him out for pretty much everything. I'm sorry, Klein. You know I love you. I'm sorry, but you do that.

I don't know. That's what you do. If I'm Klein, I'm shaking my head right now. I'm just playing it by ear, man. I'm really excited. I'm going to be hanging out with Randy.

Randy got a fade today. Got a little groomer. A clean one? He looks good. Looking fresh. He looks good, and somehow... Did he get a Nike sign

on the back or anything like that? No, he didn he get a Nike sign on the back or anything like that? No, he didn't get a Nike sign on the back. Did he get his eyebrow notched? Yeah. No, he doesn't really have eyebrows. He's a dog. You should do that. Rosie has eyebrows? Well, he has like a couple. Wispies? A couple, yeah. Like the old man things?

Yeah. Imagine someone doing that to their dog. Like, what are you doing, man? Has anyone ever faded up a... I'm just going to Google it. Dogs with Fades. That sounds like a Tumblr page. Dogs with Fades would be a great podcast. So, yeah.

What was I even saying? Yeah, this weekend it's going to be fun. I'm going to go to Eisenhower's at some point. I really am. I think the weather's going to be great. You're loco for this. I mean, you said Thursday. I really am. I think the weather's going to be great. You're loco for this. I mean, you said Thursday. I said tonight, too.

Low-key? What are you doing? Well, like I said, it's a five-day weekend. I'm going to be at match play the whole time. Sally gets into town.

I haven't seen her in like three weeks or something like that. So I guess I have to hang out with her, you know, all ball and chain. Wait. Are you going to have couch cushions

dude that's the thing so this the saga continues I don't even know if I'm going to have couch cushions because even if they're done now because of their hours 12 to 5 I'm going to have to leave the tournament early one day to go get them I'm not going to do that

you should hit up like TaskRabbit I'm going to have to that's not worth leaving that would be such a beating i'm not going to it's also really far away so like i can't it's it's impossible i'm gonna have to have somebody do it for me i'm gonna have like a uber driver or something do it uh but that being said probably going to i actually don't know what time she gets in like i i have no fucking clue what i'm doing i don't believe that for a minute but i don't i she might get in really late. So, hard to say.

Friday night? Yeah. Oh, you should just drink heavily all day. Yeah, that'd be a really good idea. So then, I do have a lunch reservation on Saturday. I know it's for the boys, but I had to get a lunch reservation. Where is it at? You don't have to say.

The boys are so disappointed. I believe it's at Joanne's in South Congress Man I had brunch there How was the food? It was so damn good It's weird that I've only had their queso Did it dribble down your lip? Primal

And then Sunday Honestly Nothing Gonna probably have a nice meal out with sally again before she catches her flight and then uh if i have couch cushions i'm gonna play fifa all night because i've just been crazy horny to play fifa lately all right we've overused that term on this pod no no we will will is over you said it each time stupid horny stop the way you like get softer when you say it makes it worse. It's for FIFA.

It's video games. No, I haven't played in a while, man. It's a bummer. I added all these backers and stuff, and I've been getting hella friend requests. I've been playing with T-Man, too. You're so popular, man. It's upsetting. Alexa, play I'm Upset.

And so that's just how it is. Why are you upset? Because I haven't played FIFA in a while. All right, all right. I spent all that money on a PlayStation 4, and I got to use it for like a week. This has been a fun episode, man. Why have you not been able to use it?

Because I'm not going to sit on my coffee table to play video games. You strike me as the kid who was kind of like a spaz and would stand and play video games and really mash the buttons and kind of get in a weird position. If I was playing Mario Kart, I wasn't the kid that leaned over trying to turn and stuff. I was pretty chill. I'm pretty focused.

What a dork that kid chill. I'm pretty focused. What a dork that kid was. I'm pretty focused. We had a kid like that in our neighborhood. We ended up not being able to play with him anymore. But before he had to stop playing with us, we just beat the piss out of him. That's so aggressive. Well, he wouldn't stop mashing the buttons.

Do we play this game? I don't even know. Are you growing your beard back out, Dave? No, I just needed to get a new razor. Shout out to Harry's. Yeah, get your Harry's razor on. I don't like shaving with subpar razors, and I have one of those. I'm trying to delay.

I'm hoping that one will show up in my mailbox. I have some Harry's refills if you need them. Just holler at your boy. I need a Harry's refill. Because strangely enough, based on my face, I don't use razors at that rapid of a clip anymore. When I do, it's definitely Harry's. But I shave my neck like once every two weeks

and I'd clean up my cheek line every day. So, I don't go through. You have great cheek lines, man. Say thank you.

It felt insincere. Yeah, it was. That was an empty compliment, so I'm not going to thank you. Okay. Where can the

people find us this week at the tourney? We'll be everywhere, man. Catch us, though. I mean, your best bet is... The gray goose. Your best bet's near the gray goose on number whatever it is.

Yeah, just follow the alcohol. It's not a par three. It's that really big downhill par five. No, the gray goose is overlooking the green of the par three before it. Am I stupid? Yes. What is the one that's... That's the ultra tent. Oh, that's the best spot can we get in there it's a good spot that's

we have access to that oh we do look at your ticket that's in front of your stupid face oh i'm trying what does this podcast with what does it say oh we're ultra club boys says the ultra club access you dumbass read read one time it does me likey i'll see at the ultra club boys yeah we're going together oh i can't wait to sip some mickey mantles been a minute Read one time Yes it does Me likey I'll see you at the Ultra Club boys Yeah we're going together Oh I can't wait to sip some Mickey Mantles It's been a minute Oh man

Oh man I heard you're not even going to drink Who told you that? Your son At CC's? Okay We just talked We just

We have a standing A standing Resi at CC's okay we just talked we just we have a we have a standing a standing resident CC's we just talk shit about you what am I doing all this he's just like

he's just like just slamming pizza like dude Doran's been such a douche this dude like when he's supposed to be at school you just go pick him up and go to CC's

and take him back are you gonna be the dad who like shows up and like brings him chicken nuggets and sits down and eats with him while all the other kids are jealous and watch you know who Dylan you going to be the dad who shows up and brings them chicken nuggets and sits down and eats with them while all the other kids are jealous and watch? You know who Dylan is?

You should be that dad. Dylan's the dude, the finance guy from Narcos, Mexico who just shows up blasting music in his red convertible. Okay, that sounds tight. Hell yeah. That was low-key the douchiest character in the history of TV and we've never confronted it as a group before.

Didn't he flip? Didn't he turn into a rat? He had to. He brought the whole thing down. He had to, yeah. He had rat vibes, yeah. Don't make rat sounds. That's going to be gross to people.

Yeah. Yeah. All right, we've got to get out of here. Yeah, I think so. We probably should have left about 40 minutes ago, but I think now is the time. Yeah, I'm about to start popping my shorts again. Randy, if you listen, make us a clip of...

That's going to confuse people because my dog is named Randy. Well, Randy knows it. My dog isn't making clips, for those wondering. Randy, our video guy, knows what I'm getting at. Our boy Alfonso, who did the rebrand, put up some shirt concepts on his Instagram page. Was there a cat on one of them? I think there was. Not on this post.

Where can I... We'll talk. We want cat. We'll talk. I'll say this. I like the designs. I like the designs. Yeah. Yeah, I think they're good. Let's get out of here. Goodbye. Love you. Bye. good all right goodbye love you bye Bye.