Circling Back - Goblins, Short Kings, and Bit Madness: Round Two

Episode Date: March 23, 2022

Why is Donald Trump consulting Kid Rock about North Korea? Are we entering Short King Spring? What is going Goblin Mode? We answer those questions and more. We also dive into the second round of Bit Madness before hitting This Weekend in Fun. Support us on Patreon and receive weekly episodes for as low $5 per month: www.patreon.com/circlingbackpodcast Purchase a Circling Back Candle: www.vellabox.com/circling-back Watch all of our full episodes on YouTube: www.youtube.com/washedmedia Shop Washed Merch: www.washedmedia.shop (0:00) Fun & Easy Banter (13:44) Trump Sought Advice from Kid Rock (21:30) Short King Spring (32:15) Goblin Dave (41:00) Bit Madness, Round of 32 (1:12:20) This Weekend in Fun Support This Episode’s Sponsors Vizzy: www.vizzyhardseltzer.com/washed Birddogs: www.birddogs.com (STEAM) Mizzen and Main: www.mizzenandmain.com (CIRCLINGBACK for $35 off) Earlybird CBD: www.earlybirdcbd.com (STEAM for 20% off) Super Speciosa: www.getsuperleaf.com/steam (STEAM for 20% off) --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/circling-back/message Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

All right, we're back circling back podcast coming to you live from the lodge presented by busy heart seltzer. The only heart seltzer with vitamin c and super fruit acerola my name is will defriest my left david that boy rough thank you will um a couple days ago i stumbled upon a twitter thread at t carter rough on twitter and um ludacris came on a noted uh hip-hop artist and someone responded with a story about ludicrous and i'd like to share it luda about five years ago i worked in a restaurant ludicrous came in ordered spring rolls and sent them back when i apologized he said don't apologize spring rolls are unpredictable i think about this at least once a week. I would love to hear actual audio

of him saying that. Have you ever really thought about that though? They kind of are. I hate spring rolls. Okay. They're really gross. Well, they look like condoms.

Yeah, stuffed with what? Cabbage? Well, also, why do they put the... I know that they want you to see how fresh the shrimp is on it,

but like, I don't want the shrimp on top of the spring roll. I kind of want it in the middle like it's a burrito. Are they unpredictable? They're kind of unpredictable. Did this story really happen? Yeah. You're doubting this random person online?

That's one of those stories where you read it. No one would make that up. Yeah, you can't. You're not like flautas? I love a flauta. Okay. What's your point? You said you didn't like spring rolls because of the way they looked or something?

Or is that Will? Somebody said they look like a condom. Will said that. They do look like a condom. I don't think a flauta does, though. No, you're thinking— It's just a rolled up tortilla. I mean, they're similar.

They're rectangular in nature. A flauta's not, but from the top, you see what I'm saying. I'm thinking— so, I mean, there's two different types of things. Cylindrical. There's the spring rolls that are fried, and then there's the spring rolls that look like condoms.

Oh, oh yeah, the clear ones. Yeah, like tell me that doesn't look like a condom. See, I'm thinking- You just put a bunch of rice and cabbage in a condom. Gross, man. So when I think spring roll, egg roll, I think of fried. But I know that that is a thing.

Don't you think it's weird? Why do they put the shrimp on top? I don't like that. Yeah. No, I like it fried. Egg rolls stink too, man. No, they don't. You don't like egg rolls?

No, egg rolls are good. No. It's a bad take. No, it's a good take. That's the take. Flouters are the egg rolls. That used to be my go-to. Yeah, Tex-Mex egg rolls.

Dude, flautas. Now, when I was younger. Southwestern egg rolls at Chili's, though. Randy might back me up here. Absolute fire. Shut up. They're so good. You can't drag the name of egg rolls and then come back and say that you like some.

Actually, when we went to Chili's for his one-year anniversary about a year ago, I remember you guys ate all the Southwestern egg rolls and I didn't get to have any. You beat me to it. I think there were five of us me four egg rolls and you guys just cleared off the i don't even seek out the egg rolls on the bartender about his martini you did a year ago you'll i just remembered that we've got randy's dinner tomorrow night i'm very excited about this shot longhorn steakhouse try to make a reservation they don't take those do they do they serve longhorn it's a steakhouse i don't know hey per dumois a number of pga pros young young lads were at jay carver's last night are you familiar with this yeah i'm not pound for pound the best menu in austin I've said it. Is Dumois doing PGA Tour content?

You like to hear that. They might be struggling. No, they're not. That's how you get Dave Ruffin. Who was it? Young golfers. Who was it? JT, Spieth.

Really? The Golf Boys. Oh, no, no, no. JT is such a charge, man. Okay. Nah, I'm in. I saw a video that would really make you hate oh i saw it you saw it i hated him before that video you good what a what a putz man well

that is kind of annoying like i don't want some dude who's six feet away heckling gets a hundred times worse than that that wasn't even heckling i know but he was trying to give a nice little tip you know what sucks is that video cut off before the shot. I wanted to see what he did. He was clearly flopping it. I wanted to see how it ended up. Are you good? Yeah, the fact that we couldn't see how it ended up was devastating.

I need to know how that shot ended. Can I just say, that was not a scenario to bump and run. Nah. Nah. That pin was a little too close to the edge of the green. I feel like those guys don't bump and run. That's an amateur shot. Weren't you trying to say that you're going to bump and run tomorrow at randy's two-year anniversary at longhorn steakhouse i said bump

and grind oh okay you know the first time i went binge mode i'll never forget this it was at a place called tia's in uh south dallas and i ordered flautas but by the time the flautas came i had eaten so many chips. Fuck, really? With so much salsa. Like, I wasn't even hungry for them. My parents were like, we just wasted, you know, $11.99 on those flautas. So instead of, like, throwing them away, I took them home and I ate them the next day. And that's the end of my story.

What was the first time you went and did a binge mode? I don't know what you mean by binge mode food what's the ideal thing to dip a flauta into uh salsa salsa but one b is queso i like i like getting a little guacamole on the tip there i'm not a problem with that a little sour cream there i'm not i like i'd prefer a sour cream drizzle on top so i'm not like doing too much sour cream, but yeah. Just a little sour cream drip. You like a drizz. Mm-hmm. A little drizzly.

You don't remember the first time you went binge mode? I don't know what you're referring to. I was binging on chips. Okay. No, I don't remember my first time I ate on chips. I have a chip problem. It's been... Yeah.

Did you see my joke on Twitter? It's kind of funny. Can I show you something? Yeah, dude. I won't show it to you. You see my joke on Twitter? I have a similar tweet in my drafts that I just didn't. And then I saw you tweet it and I was like, that's funny.

Thank you. You want to tell the folks at home about your humorous joke? Yeah, I don't know what you're even talking about. There are a bunch of four Broncos sitting somewhere. And they're unusable because they are missing the chips. Not enough chips have been produced. You know the electronic chip that goes in a vehicle that makes it operable? they are missing the chips. Not enough chips have been produced. You know, the electronic chip that goes in a vehicle that makes it operable. An e-chip.

Operable. Operational? Operational. Not operable. Anyway, KJ actually started the tweet. He said, yeah, these Broncos are sitting here or whatever. And I said, oh, you can thank Dave for that because he's been eating all the chips. I had to explain the joke.

It all roads lead back to me. There you go. There are thousands of brand new Ford Broncos, the big boys, just sitting in a field somewhere, just collecting snow and shit. It's weird. I mean, aren't they- Is it a field?

I read the other day that they're going to start shipping Ford Explorers without all the parts they'll add them later you gotta take it in like it's a recall parts have you guys like i mean have you guys tried to schedule a car maintenance thing lately because i'm gonna tell you this it's not easy i don't do that they're just full right i don't take mine to the dealership oh bad boy shit hey we got a loaded episode today we gotta dive right in hey what about my intro dylan chivery i made a homemade red eye and it's there's too much gas in here like i have to i can barely drink it i did two cups of coffee why would you admit that here and then then a two and a half ounce espresso on top and it's just straight kablamo friend of ours from college in law school would

do triple red eye that's that's not triple shot i used to at my peak at my peak coffee consumption i used to drink uh two large red eyes a day so that was about 16 ounces of coffee with two shots of espresso in it and i was doing that twice that's who are you it was one of those things where it was like i was trying to get away from my desk for a little bit, so I would go get a red eye at the coffee shop down the street, hoping that I could just be away for 10 minutes. Who was that, Dave? Were the hunks already here? No, that was not a hunk. That was Brad. Okay. The hunks get here between 12 and 2 today, too.

Perfect. I know we got a loaded episode, but I want to give a shout out to another hunk who has not stopped looking at his phone. Producer Randy with his new cool haircut. Yeah, we got cool haircut Randy. He clearly went to some like hip barber on the east side. It does look good. God, he matched that hunk button, didn't he? It looks really good. Like we would have, I was going to be upset when he cut his hair and he finally did it.

He does look pretty good, man. Looks good. He's up there. He's over there updating his, I don't know, binge or what is it? The Hungle account? Hinge? Yeah, he's updating his Hinge account, his new haircut pics. He just hit us with a you'll see.

But yeah, the hunks are coming by. Yeah, I will. That's true. I think they're just sending one hunk to give us the estimate, though. I don't need more than that. Shirtless or not? No, we're going to be shirtless. Yeah.

But we will invite them to also be shirtless. He walks in and we're just all in acid wash jeans shirtless sup man hey dude get something like the golf or something on the tv and like some music going so like there's like a cool environment that he'll want to hang out in sure you want to have like we got some beers a little bucket of beers yeah we got some electric jellyfish in the fridge right now. Oh, yeah. One electric jellyfish for these hunks that barely drink because their body fat is just so low. I think they're all below 7%. It's wild. We could black them out off one jellyfish and hang out with them all day.

And then what are you going to do? Take advantage of them? No, I wouldn't do that. I wouldn't do that. Just stare at them. Just being all hunky. You're saying that one electric jellyfish would bring someone to blacking out? Well, yeah, the college hunks don't drink, dude.

Have you seen how lean they are? You know, I've used them, and I think I've said this. I'm not quite sure they were college hunks. You used the hunks. They didn't bring their transcript. Were they at least hunks? I don't like to judge people based on that but no well that's just they were lads though and that's what really matters the young lady on the phone referred to them as honks which was really i find that to be pretty funny

like we can send two honks for like two hours it'll cost this this much we do three honks like i think two honks would probably be just fine as long as they're honks have y'all seen that uh dude yoga pants are coming back no okay like what like the really tight ones is this from your observations at the gym or did you see it somewhere online no i got some and I was just waiting for him to come back in style. I kind of want some of those tight things to wear under shorts when it's cold outside. Yoga pants. Yeah, they're essentially yoga pants. Let's not reinvent the wheel here.

They're yoga pants. Yeah, but they're just yoga pants. But I kind of want some to toss under some shorts when I'm going for a long walk or something. All right, dog, do it. I don't always want to wear my joggies. Hey. A long walk. Yep. I take a lot, do it. I don't always want to wear my joggies. Hey. A long walk. Yep.

I take a lot of them. Do you not take long walks? We should link on a walk sometime. Maybe. Maybe we can do a little rendezvous. Yeah. Yesterday, patreon.com

slash tricklebackpodcast. Do you know it? Randy's game show went live. Had an absolute blast. No spoilers on who won. Go check it out. Patreon.com slash tricklebackpodcast. More importantly, though, won. Go check it out. Patreon.com slash circling back podcast. More importantly, though, we got a new video out on YouTube.

We got to, as you guys know, we got to go out and do a little golf at Dell Match Play, Austin Country Club. And yeah, we compiled it all together. It's really our first foray into doing some extended video content. Go check it out. YouTube.com slash washed media. Again. YouTube.com slash washedmedia. Again, YouTube.com slash washedmedia. And big news, our hotline is back up.

The pipeline is fully functional at this point. 888-618-4422. Again, 888-618-4422. Get in, get out, be tactical. We will be doing voicemails tomorrow morning, so get your voicemails in now. And as always, leave a review or a five-star. Just leave five stars or review. We'll take either one. But before we get into today, let's hear from our friends over at Early Bird CBD. If you're not familiar with Early Bird,

these are gummies that are recreational hemp products that contain around two and a half milligrams of natural THC and around 12 and a half milligrams of CBD in each gummy. They're formulated for fun and to make you feel good. Dave, you've actually got some arriving in the mail today. Yeah, so pull the curtain back. They've provided us with a lot of product. I've burned through all of that product, and I like them so much. I just used a promo code. You're not supposed to burn through it.

You just chew it and swallow it. Yeah, you don't smoke them, Dave. Maybe that's why I wasn't hitting. No, I'm kidding. Stop freebasing your early birds. What's the promo code for a backer uh the promo code for this is steam for 20 off of everything on earlybirdcbd.com i i got a bottle of the watermelon which is my favorite flare strawberries are very good too and um yeah they're arriving today and i'm very excited because i'm

looking to get my sleep back where it needs to be. Because I take, not kidding, I take one pretty much every weeknight. I can't say enough good stuff about, they feel like they're magic, how well they work. Yeah. Don't they? No, they're special. They're special. They just make you feel all just like warm and fuzzy and comfortable and loose. Just fantastic, man.

Is that how they make you feel? Yeah. Sorry, I'm kind of in my zone right now. My cozy zone, my early birds. If you want to go, yeah. If you want to go cop these,

go to early bird, CBD.com use promo code steam. These are one use codes. So if you're going to use the code, load up the cart and get 20% off everything at early bird, CBD.com. Anytime kid rock is in the news, my head gets turned. When I see that Kid Rock is in the news because of Donald Trump, I pretty much break my neck like I'm Busta Rhymes.

Kid Rock and Trump are kind of riding the same wave a little bit. Kid Rock used to be, you know, in the day kid rock used to tell everybody that you know he wasn't affiliated with the political party he just he he wasn't he didn't worry about it he's somewhat flipped since then i don't know if it's the chance of let's go brandon and his recent singles or didn't you say that you had to start listening to other music because your spotify rap was going to be the like the new kid rock joints correct yeah unless you completely well i'm glad he released those songs in february because everyone knows that march 1st is when i rap was going to be the like the new kid rock joints correct yeah unless you completely well i'm glad he released those songs in february because everyone knows that march 1st is when

i start curating the rest of my years so that i can have a cool hip guy you know spotify wrapped uh do you want me to let you know what happened with this i thought you were just reviewing his new album in this segment i wish i could uh but i don't think i'll be listening to it for i'll listen to it this weekend Just listen to it on a different platform so it won't get on your rap. So this is per The Guardian. It says, the rapper Kid Rock said Donald Trump once

asked him for advice about U.S. policy on Islamic State and North Korea in an interview on Fox News with Tucker Carlson, of course. Is this the most punchable interview going right now? It's a tough it's a tough listen it broadcasted uh monday night and the musician also discussed cancel culture claiming to be uncancellable and the coronavirus pandemic uh but apparently uh trump was asking

for some uh some counsel from kid rock regarding how to handle north korea is that something that you want your president to be doing? A nuclear nation. With long-range ballistic missiles. I don't think they do. You don't think they have those? I think they're very mid-range. You think they're fake? Yeah. Could be.

A lot of people think that. He has missiles, but I don't think they're very capable. They seem to flare out a little bit. Yeah. They're like Will throw in a vortex football a little bit okay damn so i want a mile oh no is that what he says every time he launches one oh no three two oh no uh regardless though of his military capabilities um

probably don't go to kid rock for advice on how to handle it i love i want kid rock's takes on international affairs i want his takes but i don't want to implement his takes apparently they also say in this article that uh trump was drafting tweets and running them by kid rock beforehand and kid rock was just like yeah man i can't really add anything to that that that i believe more than me more than the former can you imagine the conversation happening between donald trump and kid rogers being like you think this one's gonna do nothing hey kid you hear uh anthony wiener's back on twitter i got this this draft take a look at it well that was a banger donald that's perfect man why don't you give us a rundown of that tweet i'll

call him anthony wiener a pervert on twitter do it pervert alert. So this article says he also said he and Trump were once, quote, looking at maps and I'm like, you know, am I supposed to be in on this shit? Like, I make dirty records sometimes. Wait. And then Trump said, what do you think we should do about North Korea? And I'm like, what? I don't think I'm qualified to answer this. Time out.

They were just hanging out looking at maps? Do you think Kid Rock could point out North Korea on a map? i think he'd get there he'd get there but i think it would take i think it would take three tries for him to get there just saying i just i can't get past the boys just hanging out looking at maps you don't look at maps with your squad you're just like dude that's crazy that like europe is actually not that big maps are interesting to just look at though i saw a tweet there was a tweet recently that said like why what the masculine urge for every guy to map the distance between places and it's like yeah i absolutely do that of course like

it's constant how long would it take to get there? Yeah, you just need to know. Like, yeah, if I drove from Austin to Los Angeles right now, how long would it take? Whenever like. I'd spend more time in Texas. Everyone knows that. Whenever a tragedy happens, like in Europe or something, I always look at it and then I say, okay, I was in Italy one time. And then I map out the distance.

This is before i send a tweet that says wow that's crazy i was just in italy six years ago right and like that's not it's only like 800 miles away from italy like so yeah i do i do map out stuff that's a fair assessment damn it's crazy though i'm glad you weren't there when it you know when that stuff happened the the cathedral in paris very easily could have been notre dame no notre dame yeah i was and you watched you watched them play football every once in a while that must have hit you close i went there in 28 uh 17 2018 i went there in 2018 they play that day penn state tight oh good game i went to south i went to south bend for a michigan game once and like once when i saw that cathedrals burning down, I was like, fuck, that could

have been me. We landed at DeGaulle and had to change planes. And that was like six years ago. So it was crazy. Fuck, man. I'm so glad you're okay. It was years before the fire, but yeah. Wow.

Apparently during the meeting with Kid Rock, they had ted nugent and sarah palin there as well if you were president what celebrities would you invite to the white house like well who's on who's on your first wave of celebrities that you're inviting to the guest house or get the white house to hang out with jaw like dave chappelle said like we got to get jaw on the line we got to know what he thinks about 9-11 of course he was he had his hands all over firefest if you recall yeah he's learned from it though that's why i would want him advising me like he's you know he understands what not to do i would get adam newman from we work and then i would also get jared leto playing adam newman

from we work per du mois jared leto at uchi with rogan and elon what about elizabeth holmes she might she might get the nod as well i think i just want i'm caught up on that show bottle Jared Leto at Uchi with Rogan and Elon. What about Elizabeth Holmes? She might get the nod as well. I think I just want... I'm caught up on that show, by the way. Have you watched any of We Crashed? No. The reviews for We Crashed aren't that great from what I saw yesterday.

So I'm glad I holstered the tweet that I had where I was going to say that I think the first episode of that was probably my favorite pilot episode I've seen in the last year i just loved it okay please go watch it please i'm going to follow dumois how do you spell dumois d-e-u-x-m-o-i-s this dude doesn't know how to speak french i'm getting push a t after that arby's track he laid down shout out to the young lady who emailed me over the weekend saying that telling me he made

the mcdonald's jingle his company or had a hand in it and he turns around the following week and drops a diss track on mcdonald's it's a swag move didn't see that coming he doesn't care dude his album was still the best album kanye put out in that that stretch of weeks when they were just releasing albums daytona daytona was completely agree are you following dumont on instagram or twitter david no one's following dumont twitter dude like what because i don't see t on here i just see like pictures of celebs oh my dude oh my god okay dude like just the fact that you don't know that dumont just only spills tea in the stories like what how do you not know this you wouldn't know that Dumois just only spills tea in the stories, how do you not know this?

You wouldn't know tea if it spilled on you. I fought him 15 seconds ago. That's how. You're telling me that Fiance Bay does not just sit in bed every Sunday night just tapping and just looking at Dumois all night because that's what my wife does. They do stories like the Ross Bullen podcast used to do stories, like 200

a day. You're going to unfollow this account within 48 hours, I promise. You're not going to be a big dumois guy i can tell but i'm gonna give it give a chance they're in my business you're not gonna like it has dumois done any coverage of short king spring is this the micro penis thing wait this story's not about micro penises is it i don't know i'm unfamiliar with the micro penis story per vice tiny penises are back they're back in yeah well this is also per vice it just says it's officially a short king spring the internet says tall men have dominated the dating scene for far too long but a new era is upon us short kings and micro penises are back in who decided this

sounds like vice probably a short guy with a small penis yeah probably you want to name names i don't i don't know anybody by that description like 10 years ago there's an article on some you know fashiony blog kind of thing that said that guys with beer bellies are in that summer and like this was probably at my my height of being chunky and i was so happy that that we were we were living that summer was this red Red Wings sweater Will on local TV? It could have been around that time, yeah. Next to the tallest reporter in the world? People are talking.

I kind of feel bad. They're just using photos of Tom Holland for this article. If you're Tom Holland, I'm sure that you're happy that you're getting media coverage. But at the same time, are you kind of like, can I not be the face of Short King Spring? There's most of Hollywood. that's why this is happening the whole tom holland's in days and days and dia how do you say dia zendaya i don't know if that's right i think it is where he was like someone asked me about being shorter than her and he was like doesn't bother i stop asking me about he's a secure king it's like as am i we'll see now that now that i know that short king spring is in,

I think I'm going to start referring to myself as 5'11 instead of 6 feet. Yeah, I'm no longer flirting with 5'10. I'm just straight up 5'9, baby. Love that. Love that. Randy? How tall are you? Oh, you're still above 6 feet?

Oh, sorry. I can pop down to 6. How tall are you, Randy? 5'11. Randy says he's 5'4". That's sick. That's a significant amount of inches you've lost. Holy shit, his phone's lighting up already.

It's because he updated his hinge. That's what he was doing during the intros. He was- Height 5'4", new haircut. Who dis? That's what he put. That's a winner. Most dudes in Hollywood are under 5'10 right

or at least that used to be Tom Cruise is like 5'6 they get chicks Salt Bae is like 5'5 that's your boy that's your boy cleaning up those saltier nachos

if you're not careful damn Lil Kim wasn't fucking around she's actually 4'11 like she is Lil know what I mean wow I used to have a big crush on her. Really?

Michael J. Fox, 5'4". Seth Green. Has he ever won an Oscar? He's also 5'4". Hello. Hello. Robert Downey Jr. is only 5'8". Same with Efron. I mean,

Dustin Hoffman, 5'6". It is short King Spring. These guys are all absolute snacks. Mario Lopez, he's flirting with 5'10". If Mario Lopez lists 5'10", he's 5'8". He seems like the ultimate at multiple inches. Why? It's AC Slater, dude.

He invented a whole way of sitting in a chair. What have you done? If you weren't tossing that chair around at least once once a week when you know during the lunchtime you weren't swag i got kicked out of school for sitting like that why i said it was dangerous i did i did have to stand in math class for leaning back in my chair too much i was a lean back guy. Oh, man. Were you doing the Rockaway as well?

I love leaning back, dog. Miss Osga, she told me to stand up the rest of the class. You can't lean too much, though. You're in trouble if you do. Pop. Fall back, man. It's not good. Not a good situation.

You can really hurt yourself or someone else. I heard the homie's been leaning back hard. He just sits sideways really i taught him how to do it he was holding a pencil the other day and i was like what's up what are you doing right now you drawing something he's like i'm just gripping grain is that what he said yeah i get so cool and he flipped me off and walked off he's so much cooler than i am purdue moi scars guard is really He's hot, dude. He's a hot man. Like, I know that he was an absolute, like, terror in Big Little Lies.

His suit game was fire. But, like, yeah, his wardrobe in that was insane. He put on... He was acting. I mean, that's not really how he is. So he didn't actually, like, harass these women? You can separate the art from the actor. He was great in Zoolander

he's one of the models he's one of the models who died in the freak gasoline fight cool it would be so sick let's do Zoolander quotes I wish

I wish that like I could have been one of the models in that and like not had an acting career at all but just you got to be one of those

and you could just tell people like yeah I was actually the yeah that was me yeah remember the gasoline fight from Zoolander

I was in that yeah Skarsgår I was in that. Yeah, Scar's Guard's in that one, man. Scar, we call him Scars. Now that we've already accomplished getting on camera for like the Food Network, we get a text every like four months, like, is this you guys on the Food Network? Yeah, it is.

Not to brag. Obviously. Yeah. I think we now need to go on the big screen. I think we need to start figuring out like if we can be extras in anything. I've on the big screen it's pretty nice okay i forgot you have dave and i need to get on the big screen i've never been in a movie before dave i actually have i was in free willy really yeah i was an extra what were you doing i was in the background Okay

I was playing kickball With some people How funny slash soft Is it that J-Bone Was in A Dolphin's Tale Of all movies Oh is that what it was I thought it was Free Will

No it was A Dolphin's Tale That's way worse Nah damn it A Dolphin's Tale is my favorite That's a great movie Did that win J-Bone at a lot Did that win it's match up

J-Bone impression Yeah I think it did I remember Oh yeah that's the one Where I voted against Women in STEM Did that win its matchup? Daybone impression? Yeah, I think it did. I remember. Oh, yeah. That's the one where I voted against women in STEM, and then some women in STEM reached out to me. I voted against women in STEM. I had a lot of women in STEM reach out to me thanking me for my support. I love them.

Just the bit was, you know, it wasn't going to win. It's not a championship-worthy bit. The way I think I look at it is, like women in stem it's it's just not a bit to me yeah we take it very seriously i didn't think about it from that angle jay bone one yeah okay jay bone's slowly morphing into a 20s yeah not even a gangster i'm fine journalist i'm fine with that. I'm a journalist. I'm fine with that. Journalist. Yeah, I'm selling my papers on the corner.

Yeah, deep drive to Lafayette. Now, shoeless Joe out there. So what's the deal? I thought you would stand women in STEM. Didn't you say you only smoke STEMs? Come on, man. That's what you said. Dude burns mid. Have you never smoked weed out of a coke can with

me okay then you don't know shit i've only smoked weed out of like an apple that too i've done that i've only done it once but i was actually very proud of myself when i made it work it's kind of sick the other the other person i was with was like holy fuck you actually did it and i was like yeah i didn't think this was going to happen. I did not think this was going to work at all. You guys ever boil banana peels thinking you could smoke it because your buddy read it in like the Anarchist Cookbook or something? No. We weren't like, we weren't bad boys. We weren't trying to smoke random stuff.

Sixth grade was a fun time. Dave, I just saw you got a 16 ounce nitro white here. What's in a nitro white? Half and half in nitro cold brew. Wow, dude. I guess you're not in your man shit today. I'm not. I'm getting in touch with my feminine side.

Maybe you should think about doing that once in a while, Dylan. That's how I honor. This is too much to hand women, Sam. You have the toxic masculinity of coffee in your hands right now. You barely drink this. Your coffee's problematic. I don't like your bing bong. It's toxic.

Yeah, your coffee just told me to go make a sandwich. Your coffee's problematic. I don't like your bing bong. It's toxic. Yeah, your coffee just told me to go make a sandwich. That's pretty good. Yeah. Your coffee's mansplaining the wage gap to me right now, saying that it's justified. You told me to mind the gap.

We should put that on a shirt. Mind the gap? We might get sued by Kanye for having the gap on a shirt mind the gap we might get sued by kanye for having the gap on a shirt it's fair yeah that would actually be good for us you know i wouldn't mind being i don't know what i was gonna say i thought i had a really good transition but i didn't we don't like it i feel like an ad an ad reads coming. But the thing is, Mizzen and Main speaks for itself. It doesn't need a transition. You know what I mean? You know what I mean?

I do know what you mean. I mean, you guys have seen us rocking Mizzen and Main all over the place. If you watched our PGA video that we released yesterday, you'll see that Brett is wearing a sweatshirt that I didn't even know was Mizzen and Main. I just started complimenting it. My pants were Mizzen and Main. My shirt was Mizzen and Main. My hat wasn't, but I very easily could have had the hat on too,

which I wear all the time. I get excited anytime I get to put on a Mizzen and Main button down because I know that for the first time in a long time, I'm not going to just absolutely sweat through it and just have a wrinkled mess on my hands. They know what they're doing. It feels amazing. And my dress shirts, like up until then, my dress shirts are always stiff.

They make me sweat. They wrinkle easily, like I just said. It's just miserable out there. But Miz and Domaine, they've corrected everything. Miz and Domaine combines the comfort and flexibility of your favorite athletic wear with the fit and style of a custom dress shirt. They're lightweight. They're breathable. They're moisture wicking.

And this bad boy will have you looking great. Plus, their dress shirts is the best part, I think. Machine washable. So you can skip those trips to the dry cleaner. Oh, my gosh. That is such a clutch move. part i think machine washable so you can skip those trips to the dry cleaner oh my gosh that is such a clutch move i mean there's a reason that take it getting taken to the cleaners means that you're just getting absolutely shelled you ever been in that situation where you've got like

a formal event you realize your your nice shirt is dirty and you don't have enough time to bring it to the cleaner having the mizzen is game changer if you're going on a vacation where you have to wear like consecutive nights of nice shirt packing a mizzen in maine might be the best way to go about it it's become uh i have i think three mizzen button downs at this point and they're just my go-to hit the town shirts well yeah they got famous for their dress shirts but they also make incredibly comfortable flannels no tuck shirts performance polos chinos and so much more all in performance fabrics

with modern tailoring. Like a couple really dope vests too. I know vest season is coming to an end here pretty soon, but my goodness. Oh,

whether you're updating your wardrobe to head back to the office or you're just looking for a new flannel, we've got good news. Right now, if you go to

mizzenandmain.com and use promo code circling35, you'll get $35 off any regular price order of $125 or more. That's $35 off when you go to M-I-Z-Z-E-N-A-N-D-M-A-I-N.com and use our promo code CIRCLING35. Dave, do you have a question? I do, Will. Thank you for asking.

Slobbing out and giving up. Why are so many people going goblin mode i don't have an answer is this right according to urban dictionary a variation of the cowgirl sexual position yeah we're talking different goblin keep going which the person on top has their hands and feet planted onto the other person. No. Also often involves grunting and occasionally manic laughing. What? No, that's not what I was talking about. Yeah, that's not the same goblin mode, my guy.

Somehow. Can you explain it to me? What is your goblin mode that you're in right now? I mean, like, when I think of goblin mode, when I'm going gob mode, I call it gob mode. I love gobbing. The term embraces the comforts of depravity.

Spending the day in bed watching 90 Day Fiance on mute while scrolling endlessly through social media. That's so me. Pouring the end of a bag of chips in your mouth. Hello? That's a move that you just have to do. Downing Eggo toaster oven waffles with hot sauce over the sink because you can't be bothered to put them on a plate. Leaving the house in your pajamas and socks only to get a single diet coke from the bodega who wrote this god damn it they're doing a lot you they just had to shoehorn bodega in to make it sound like i go the opposite of

if i'm like hungover i go opposite of goblin mode i want i just want luxurious shit all over me the entire day i shower get dressed It's just being a lazy POS. Sure. Yeah, so you're in goblin mode right now. You are a piece of shit. You used to be. You're not anymore. People can change.

Can I just keep reading quotes about what it is? Yes, you can. Goblin mode is like when you wake up at 2 a.m. and shuffle into the kitchen wearing nothing but a long t-shirt to make a weird snack, like melted cheese on saltines. How is that goblin mode? That's just everyday life mode. Dylan, you'll relate to this.

It's about a complete lack of aesthetic. I don't get it. Because why would a goblin care what they look like? Why would a goblin care about presentation, as they are a goblin? It's fair enough. Are goblins the things that are on like castles that just sit there like staring at you? Close.

Probably a variation of goblins. They're like cousins. Remember gargoyling? Yeah. I liked gargoyling. I thought it was a good way. I thought it was a good alternative to doing a keg stand. Should I do it right now on here?

All right. FMK, but with other stuff. T-bowling, planking, gargoygoyling god t-bowing is the worst i'm canceling t-bowing t-bowing is the is obviously standing gargoyling and then planking i'm i actually think planking is still funny randy puts off which still plank in 2022 vibes sally has sally studied abroad in uh college and she has an entire album on her facebook which i think she might have actually since deleted but it was just an entire album of her and her friends just planking everywhere like you guys thought that you were the funniest people in the world was really hot for a minute and now all of your all of your memories

from studying abroad are just ruined by the fact that you guys decided to plank in every photo. Dude, that's team content in college. Before she even met you. You send the homie over to Spain for a semester, and he returns back, and all the photos are of him just dabbing. Are you going to be like, well, Parks, did you take any where you didn't dab? He would totally do that. Is he still dabbing? Oh, yeah. He still dabs.

Back in the day, Dylan used to say he couldn't plank because he didn't have the core strength. I don't remember saying that. I could out-plank you. You can't out-plank me. Bitch. Watch me. Let's go right now. Every two years, there's a story about some old dude who does the world's longest plank.

I know. He'll plank for 48 hours or something. I'm not impressed by that. I think about it every time I try to plank. Is that on his toes and elbows? Yeah. Toes and bows, as you guys called it? Yeah i try to plank is that on his like toes and elbows yeah toes and bows as you guys called it i could plank for a couple hours dude we had to we had to plank but with bottle caps under our elbows i mean we really did though there's a thing i kind of wish

you guys would have had to haze me before i accepted my my job at grand x bows and toes like my first my first day should have just been you guys beating the out of me in the basement we thought about it that building didn't have a basement though we would have found one i remember dylan just walked into the conference room when i was sitting there the first morning that i worked there and i was just like god this guy's this guy's a man and i'm just a child mere child over here i don't know why you thought that and then dvd the video guy came in wearing a cowboy hat and i was like this guy's a wild card turns out my first impression was absolutely correct that dude is a wild card he was just like what's up man he's he's wait who dvd i thought you were

doing jesse i mean it's the same boy he was the jesse of grand i mean that in the best way ever. I'm MTV's VJ, Jesse. And now, the presidents of the USA with peaches. Are you going to make it to the Beer Olympic video? How many of our listeners actually know Jesse from MTV's So You Want to Be a VJ? I don't know. He beat Dave, and Dave is still relevant. Dave Holmes, that is. Davemes has had a better career so i've i found out what randy was actually doing on his phone why does he like to post when we start recording was he talking to you talk about he talking you

know he knows what he's doing it's bullshit he didn't he just lets us like organically find yeah don't talk about it don't give him now. He put so much effort into this post, it's ridiculous. My God. Can I keep reading Goblin Mode quotes? Yeah. Goblin Mode is kind of the opposite of trying to better yourself,

says Juniper, who declined to share her last name. I think that's the kind of energy that we're giving going into 2022. Everyone's just kind of wild and insane right now. Oh, dude, we're so crazy. These times are unprecedented we're so crazy. These times are unprecedented.

We're crazy. We don't care, man. The government had so much more potential than what it actually is. I thought it was something really cool, but it's actually pretty lame. You know, Dylan, that's funny you say that. The trend represents a direct departure from the hyper-curated cottagecore influence

of early pandemic days, a standout trend of 2020 that included pastel colors, bucolic scenery, and the showcasing of wholesome homemaking skills such as baking and embroidery. You got really into embroidery during the early pandemic. I did, yeah. Cottagecore thrived under the wistful ethos of making the best of what many people assumed would only be a few boring weeks home in 2020. Boy, were we wrong. It's like, dude, would this ever ever end are we living in a simulation simulation they just delayed that They just understood we were doing Papa Roach.

Do we have anything else on goblin mode? No. I woke up in G mode. The power of goblin mode is that it takes over your body. It is a scrambling of the brain. It's when you act crazy and you enter a very mythological space. You want to jump on the back of a salamander and make trouble none of this is no one's doing any of this i'm sorry but it's like that if i'm like hanging out with some say let's say i'm single

i'm hanging out with somebody for a little bit and then like i i sleep over at their place maybe i don't want to catch an uber home who knows maybe maybe i'm like you know getting to first base are you shacking wake up the next day and they're like, I don't know, eating chips in bed, eating waffles with hot sauce over the sink, which should not be a thing. No one's done that ever. And you're like, hey, what's, babe, you good? And she's like, oh, sorry, I'm in goblin mode. I'm like, okay, get out of here. Urban Dictionary has a few definitions.

You already let us know. I'd like to hear more. This one is just basically just like giving up. When you lose yourself so you resort to becoming a goblin. Example, I don't even know who I am anymore. Looks like you're going goblin mode. What if you lose yourself in the music the moment? You better own it.

What if? Does that count as goblin? That's a good question. When one mounts as a goblin, what as they mate into the sunset? What does that even mean? Yeah, I don't even know what that means. Very cool. Anyway.

Very glad we did that story. Yeah, very good. We were going to do it Monday. But you know what got in the way? That's crazy we didn't do it. Bit Madness got in the way, baby. We got some good run out of that. Round of 32.

Let's go. You guys know what it is. Bit Madness. All the listeners. They've ranked our bits and we've decided to make a bracket and determine what the champion was from the last year.

On Monday's episode, we did all of round one. Today, we're going to do all of round two. Randy, let's get it started. To start things off today, our number one overall seed, 1940s Gangster Voices, goes up against number nine seed, The Masculine Urge. The infamous one nine.

As much as I did enjoy The Masculine Urge have we've actually got a lot of run out of the masculine urge as we started doing you know manly coffee content today i just don't think there's a way i can vote against 1940s gangster voices for today the masculine urge to pull out a tommy gun and just let that thing sing you're combining the bits that's good that's good i'm gonna put this on dylan i'm going masculine urge upset upset alert this is sad because um i do love the masculine urge because i have many of them myself we know kind of gotten out of control lately god but no the answer here the winner here is 1940s gangster voices yeah yeah hey masculine, go sleep with the fishes.

I got to clean up these streets, see. Get the riffraff out. Yeah, see. Hey, Kick Rocks. Masculine Urge, beat it. Hit the Brex Pal. I can't unhear J-Bone.

Yeah. They're morphing into the same. Was J-Bone just early on this bit? No, it's just who he is're morphing into the same was jay bone just do early on this bit no it's just how it's just who he is he was born in the wrong yeah was he wrong decade he's an old soul he really he really is yeah it's really beautiful our number five versus our number 13 reading wikipedia from memory versus number 13 you're not that guy pal

are you i think i think we could have gotten more run out of you're not that guy, pal. Are you? I think we could have gotten more run out of you're not that guy, pal. That guy was just perfect. I feel like we wore it out pretty quick. That guy would have voted for masculiners in the last round. What I like about reading Wikipedia from memory

is that I always know that when Dave starts doing it, that it's going to get an immediate smile and maybe a little laugh out of Dylan every single time. But Dave also just has such a deep memory bank that he doesn't even read it from wikipedia people just think that he is he's very knowledgeable which surprises a lot of people you did go to like law school and shit you have to be very very intelligent to do that only smart people there are no dumb people who went to law school people forget that crazy did you think about throwing your hat in for the next supreme court justice yeah i didn't i didn't get the nod that's too bad i didn't they didn't hit

me with that nom you could see if kid rock could put in a good word for you no we didn't spend enough time on that story i know i'm like i can't get past it because i don't believe it but it's i keep picturing in my head him being like, I'm just looking at a map and just pointing to problematic regions. What about here? What about here, Robbie? What are we going to do about ISIS? China. We got to devalue the ruble.

I'm voting number five, reading Wikipedia from memory. You're not that guy, pal. That was a great clip, but in terms of bits that actually made it into the podcast, I just don't think you're not that guy, pal, went far enough. Let me step in here and give a vote for you're not that guy, pal. Wow. Are you? And put it to Davey over here. Absolutely.

You're not that guy. Are you that guy? Show us you're that guy, pal. you're not that guy are you that guy i'm gonna show you that guy i'm gonna vote for myself yes only because it is the it is by definition a bit our and it's like an original circling back bit and you're not that guy pal is there something we kind of wore the fuck out hilarious and and maybe the best y'all did more with it on too much dip than you did with it on circling back that that's why i have less of a connection to you're not that guy pal And maybe the best... Y'all did more with it on Too Much Dip than you did with it on Circling Back. That's why I have less of a connection to You're Not That Guy, pal.

Our number three versus our number 11 seed, we've got the very infamous sound clip. Versus Goated and Woated. Do you guys want to hear the clip again just to make sure that you know it? Yeah. Man, I had the biggest crush on Jessicaessica simpson like at what point 20 years ago i don't know like she when was she when was dukes of hazard well that was that was much further

into her career when she first was on the scene her video uh for i believe the song was 2005 uh i want to love you forever that's when she started climbing charts. And I was like, damn, she's bad. She is bad. She was bad. She was saying that's when his pants started climbing charts. Mm-hmm. Because you were erect. You're right. Yeah.

That's what happens when you are aroused, if you're a guy. Had to get a new mattress. Yeah. Because of the hole. This is a hard matchup. Goated and voted is something that still is in our vocabulary daily and it's getting my vote because dylan wore out goaded 48 hours in yeah that's what i do like every podcast we came into that was what honestly yeah and the fact that you called your shot and

you said beforehand that you were going to wear it out i think i'm gonna have to go with dave and go for the number 11 upset here. Really? Go to voted. I was going to vote for Jessica Simpson. It might be time to replace the Jessica Simpson sound clip on the board. It's been there for long enough. I think I got to hit the refresh button soon. I like to look at a map with her. I'm going to do a major refresh of the board once.

You need to relax. A peninsula maybe? You need to relax. Your pen 15 insula? Maybe. I'm sorry. Too much nitro white. Number seven.

Just kidding, Bae. Unique investment opportunities versus number two, Dave's Little Whiskey Girl. Mm-hmm. A.K.A. Will's wife. My wife. Ooh. Okay. I voted for Dave's Little Whiskey Girl in round one as she is my wife but the further this

goes the less i want to vote for it you can't have family members going out first round yeah you can't that's just tough you guys did vote rosie out first round uh last year the year before though so i'm not i haven't forgotten this that was tough i look back on that and it's tough she threw up this morning i just got the text y'all voted oh no y'all voted against my son at one point so it wasn't the best bit it was your son eat shit yeah your son's not a bit he's a human being correct i'm i'm going to for probably the final time and during this entire voting process i think i'm going to vote for dave's little whiskey girl i'm going unique investment opportunities because dylan i've got something I'd like to talk to you about offline.

Okay. Okay. I think when Dave's Little Whiskey Girl first happened, it happened right here on the pod, I laughed very, very hard. And while I do love unique investment opportunities as a bit, I didn't get the hearty laugh I got out of that one as I did Dave's Little Whiskey Girl. So they're both yours, Dave. So, I mean so i mean yeah it's true most of these are yours yeah dave's funny would my superhero would my avengers be like the bit and it's just like i just show up and i just got like a new bed and like it stops down like uh ultron or whatever you show up talking about how many chips you eat what would your name be the bit the goblin how is there not a goblin davy goblin davy gobbles what does a

goblin sound like well do an impression it's good that's really good that's more of a gargoyle zombie i think though what do gargoyles sound like? Hey. Well, they're made out of cement. Wait. Hey. That is not how they sound. You're walking up the steps in Notre Dame and you say, hey. Hey.

Come on in. It's on fire. It's building's on fire. Are all gargoyles menacing? Are there any friendly ones that are just welcoming? Like, hey, come on in. They're small little fellas though they're i'm not scared i'm much more scared of a goblin yeah for sure really do goblins eat you like zombies do or do they just fuck with you no they just play pranks on you and shit no they just eat waffles over the sink they eat all your chips they eat waffles over the sink yeah what They bring cookies into bed and get crumbs everywhere.

Wear long t-shirts, apparently. They wear tall tees. They're just pieces of shit, basically. That's all a goblin is. They didn't used to be pieces of shit. They're still pieces of shit. They just, at some point, turned into pieces of shit. This is stupid. Okay.

We got a two versus a seven. Dylan hanging televisions versus number seven, real or fake? This is pretty easy for me. I'm going to go with dylan hanging tvs just because because i'm really good at it he's batting about 90 when it comes to hanging tvs i'm batting a thousand no you dropped one on the ground and broke it with that i had nothing to do with my hanging skills and then you tried to blame your son behind the behind closed doors you're like dude it's all parks his fault that poor little fellow thought it was his fault man i mean we're about to when we move offices the next uh few weeks we're really gonna see what

dylan's tv hanging skills can do yes you are and that's why i'm gonna also vote for dylan hanging televisions for this matchup man sorry bud man that little uh that little what i'm gonna describe it as a living area in the new space because that's what they have it set up as we're gonna have some fun we're gonna do some fun stuff there i'm excited for it what a tease davy we're gonna do some fun stuff fun stuff guys you can do fun stuff with me this is a big one this is a big matchup guys and work with the eyes that's fun that is fun It's fun to have fun. It is. We got a number six college hunks versus number three tiny Dylan giant KJ. I hate that they've met in this round.

I don't like this. What are the chances that a college hunk shows up while we're talking about college hunks? Because one is supposed to show up in a little bit. They're not bad. If a college hunk shows up in the next couple minutes while we're talking about this matchup, I will switch my vote from tiny Dylan KJ to college hunks. They're they're hunks and carl only if the hunk from college gets on the mic or didn't they go to school i just imagine them working out like they're uh part of the the little troop in uh righteous

gemstones the god team or what the power team with the god squad or one of them's names tristan probably my least favorite storyline of the entire show i didn't like it's weird i thought it was thought it was okay um i think i'm gonna make a bold declaration more college hunks come from texas state than any other college per capita is that because that's where you went to school and you're a certified hunky? This is a self-serving prediction. No, but just think, Dylan, think about like early 2000, not early, mid to late 2000s.

Is it true you tried to go SAE and they're like, you're not- Some of my good friends were SAEs. You're not SAE material. I was not. You weren't hunky enough. I wasn't a professional spring breaker. You didn't have frosted tips.

I did not participate in Spiff G'day. Spiff G'day was so fun. Except for all the bad shit that happened during it. Who are you voting for? Tiny Dylan, Giant KJ. It goes through, baby! Sorry, Dylan. This one might go deep.

This is a tight matchup. Number four versus number five. Let me be the first versus number five. Dylan putting pizza and vet appointments on the company card. The fact that you're trying to keep this bit alive tells me everything I need to know. And that's why I'm going to vote for number five. Dylan putting pizza on the company card. They were both very accidental.

I'm glad that Stella's fine. And I'm glad that she's kind of made it through whatever she was going through. It's a routine. She got a little Bordetella. That's all she got. A little Vax. Bordetella.

Bordetella. Hey, hey. Get a pinch of that Bordetella. It's a freaking bacteria. Hey, what kind of cheese goes best with the Bordetella? Right. I'm voting for Dylan putting pizza and his vet appointments on the company card. This is a bit that needs to end because you're tanking the company.

I'm not sure how we're going to financially recover from this, but I have to go with this. I still owe the company 73 US dollars. If it's going to keep costing the company money, it better move on. Better get some more life out of it. Okay. I'm scared of this next matchup and i'm i don't want to be the first to vote here we've got probably the hardest matchup at this side of the bracket right now we've got number one bing bong super fantastic and kablamo aka just different

names for coffee going up against oh wait sorry dave you say it do a goblin saying it. Away. Why did your goblin... Oh, gargoyle. Excuse me. Owie. Owie. Owie. Owie. Owie.

Hey. This cathedral's on fire. Hey. This cathedral's on fire. Not funny when they burn. No, but we're medicine. Are they repairing that? We'll be okay.

We're fixing it, right? Well, I can just let it sit there, right? Does it back up? We back up? I don't know. If there's one Notre Dame that needs some repairing, I think it's in South Bend, if you know what I mean. Oh, like the school.

They haven't done shit lately. They gave Tech a good run in the round of 32. Tech's got the Dukies. Oh! No, the Dukies. Oh! No, the Dukies! Oh! Upset alert! Boy, that is...

Love Dick Vitale. That's a bad Dick Vitale. The Dukies! The Dukies, baby! I'm voting for Bing Bong, Super Fantastic, and Kablamo. I am too. It's going through. And I love Uwe a lot.

So that says a lot. I do too. I think Uwe, they're a young team. I think they've got some staying power in this tournament. And I think next year might be their year. Yeah. Before we get into our next batch of everything, let's talk about our friends over at Super Speciosa.

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How are your likes? That might be Randy's best post of all time. It's pretty good. I'm not kidding. It's pretty good. Did he do an Instagram? He did. Man, this is good.

I like this a lot. We got number one, the Dick's Saloon going up against number eight, the No Boo Spinach Salad. Hey there, boys. Come on in. Can you imagine if they served that at the Dick's Saloon? Pull up a stool. What kind of dressing would they put on it?

I don't know. Some of those pictures that Randy posted made me uncomfortable. Yeah, I agree. Maybe the last one. But it's going to do numbers. It's doing quite well. He's checking his shares. He's trying to get on that Discover feed.

I don't want to vote first. Somebody else vote for me. I'm going with the saloon. There's days or two steak nats. I'm going to put the onus on Dylan because I still like the Nobu spinach salad bit for some reason. So I'm going to ride with that right now. Well, you know, it's the notable thing from Nobu. It's a great spinach salad bit for some reason, so I'm going to ride with that right now. Well, you know, it's the notable thing from Nobu. It's a great spinach salad.

I just can't wait to be the deciding factor of whether or not this spinach salad is goaded or not. You're going to love this spinach salad. Well, it's definitely a spinach salad. Well, it's so good. I can hear Dave's tweet that said, it's fine. I can hear it in my brain, and it's unfair, but that's just what I hear. I think you're going to like it more than than i did the spinach salad was fine per day

okay you know that even if dave if his mind was blown by this by the spinach salad he wasn't gonna give me credit by saying that he was going to shit on it in one way by saying it's fine it's like acknowledges that you know it's not terrible that's accurate yeah what he said is not a lie see he loved it i'm voting for the nobu spinach salad dicksaloon dicksaloon what goes through okay dicksaloon dicksaloon goes through um i had a lot of fun with the dicksaloon and at the dicks you're still having a lot of fun yeah you still got a running tab it's the most masculine gay bar in the world and i love why have you not whoa whoa whoa whoa. There's nothing wrong with that.

It's just a bar, right? There are a lot of dudes there. Okay. I don't know. When you're there, you're family, though, so I don't care. Like, is it a sausage fest sometime? Sure. Doesn't mean.

Come on. You don't know that. They have tube steaks on Thursday nights. Yeah, have you had it? They smoke it, and then they sear. They do the reverse sear. Really? Yeah.

Oh, I didn't realize that. We got a trigger out back. She's fired up right now. Signature pellets. Go pick out your steak. We'll throw it on for you. Heck, we'll slaughter the cow in front of you. What's that mean?

What? I don't want to know. I don't want to see that part yeah i just want my steak you don't want to see how the sausages might oh i suppose number five perfectly tiny arms versus number 13 throwing that ass in a circle i was throwing that ass in a circle really like no that big of a bit i think we got to go with perfectly tiny arms here i don't think there's any way around it you know the story there was a new story like a nice what was supposed to be like a nice restaurant in dallas i guess they have a dj oh yeah and the dj played a song from a dallas rapper whose name escapes me called Throw Dead Ass in a Circle. And people obliged. They started throwing that ass in a circle.

As one will. And the manager kicked him out. And it was a big deal. And that song still pops up in my playlists occasionally. If you own an establishment, wait, did the song play over the restaurant speakers? They had a DJ at the restaurant while people were dining. What are they expecting? People to just keep their asses still in their seats?

Imagine if Back That Ass Up came on while you're eating at Longhorn Steakhouse. Sounds awesome. You're just going to sit there? Sounds awesome. That's ridiculous. I'm going to spank your ass with my T-bone. Okay. Randy, do they have a T-bone on the menu at Longhorn Steakhouse?

Floppy steaks for the boys. Floppy or sloppy? Floppy. I'm going five. Perfectly tiny arms. I'm throwing that ass in a circle. I'm putting it on Dylan. I'm going to have to go perfectly tiny.

Excuse me. Tiny arms here. I'm not mad about it. Why aren't you living that life, though? Look at mine. Look at this. That's a beautiful arm. Look at this. There's hardly any definition. You're so dedicated to this bit, you got some of your arm removed, remember? Mm-hmm. I went to Kim Kardashian's

lipo person really yep they siphoned all my fat out of my arms they siphoned it yeah they let me get a hit too they just know they were like oh sir sir you're taking too much out it's so weird well you got a hand what kind of place is this your own muscle the siphon just doesn't give a fuck nah the siphon siphon doesn't stop he'll suck he'll suck absolutely anything anything else if you can not that i can talk about okay oh we got number three versus number 11 or some people are calling it the 311 come original matchup will ratio and dylan versus Micah being retired.

I'm bouncing Micah. Love Micah, but this is not a matchup. This is over very quickly. I agree. I work too hard to ratio you. I can't just not stand that until I can anymore. Even though I am the butt of the joke, it is a funny one.

Micah was just indecisive. Yeah. He's trying to actively do less content where I'm trying to actively do more content that's better content we can't reward that yeah our next one final one of this side or this top part of the bracket we got number seven not until i've had my coffee versus number two cosmo bartender this bed is two weeks old by the by the way i mean you follow me they won their conference tournament and are on a tear right now they're blowing the doors off of other people there's no way that cosmo bartender doesn't go through here in my eyes

i agree man it's i i love it dave it's three for three yeah it's not even not even a choice how many backers have you guys had reach out to you asking what bar? Three. Yeah. I've had numerous people reach out being like, hey, what bar was it that you guys were standing at? And I've had to reluctantly tell them, you know what? It's like a nondescript. I couldn't tell you. It's not a popular bar.

I don't even know if it has a name. No, definitely not. I don't think it has a name. It's just a casino. JJ revealed it on Too Much Dip the other day. Oh, he does have a name? He did. Oh, okay. I didn't know.

You'll have to go listen. I thought it was just a random bar in the casino. Go listen to it. Will's on there doing F1. Check out Too Much Dip the other day. Oh, he does have a name? He did. Oh, okay. I didn't know. I'll have to go listen. I thought it was just a random bar in the casino. Go listen to it. Will's on there doing F1. Check out Too Much Dip. I didn't get nearly as much hate as I thought I would. I kind of want more. Put a pot of coffee on.

Someone tries to talk to me. Haven't had it yet. See where I'm going with this? See, I combined the bits again. Oh, that's good. That's good. Speaking of coffee, we got- You follow me? We got number two, black coffee, no creamer, versus number 10, having a man cave. No.

A people cave. A people cave. Yeah. If it was people cave, I might vote for that one, but I got to go black coffee, no creamer. It's a cave of people. I'm going man cave, because, dude, I mean, as soon as I get home from work, I put on my house shoes and just go out to the cave. You go out to it? It's not attached to your house?

No, I just walk out front, open the garage door, walk in, then I shut the garage door. It doesn't make any sense. Okay. Interesting. It's kind of messed up when God made Texas. He was like, I'm going to put a bunch of limestone here so they can't have basements.

He was like, I'm going to make these people work for the man caves. They're going to have to construct them on top of the land. That's why we have the best ranch waters though. Facts. Because the water's different here. What are you voting for, dog? Onus is all over you right now. Black coffee, no creamer.

Are you kidding me? Done. Did you put creamer in your red eye today? Are you kidding? I'm on my man shit today. The masculine urge to throw all the creamer in the trash when babe brings it home. You know what happens when you put creamer into a red eye?

Turns into a pink eye and he stopped laughing dylan do you remember when you got pink eye on both eyes i i got pink eye one time long time ago it wasn't that bad my eye didn't crush shut like they say oh mine did it looked like somebody did a snot rocket onto my eye socket and it just dried it was disgusting we had to shut the bar down for a couple days had an outbreak pink eye outbreak yes sir what happened how did what caused it dylan i don't know if you're ready for that some boys got a little wild tis the season pink eye season let's just say it was an all-you-can- can eat buffet that's disgusting we ain't talking jimmy jimmy buffett correct okay move on keep on going jimmy dean sausage

number six being a noted blank guy versus number three walking impressions i can't do it walking impressions okay he's not from he's not like a native of italy fucking impressions what if what if christopher walken was guest bartending at the dick saloon hey there boys come on in pull up a chair that's all i got for now it was pretty good that's good that you crushed that that was really good careful for pink eye walking impressions moves on pink eye is a big problem in here it's walking impressions we will walk in impressions that's pretty good you know he got shot in the face? Really? Is he okay? I think he lived. Not with Christopher Walken, the guy who sang that song.

Walking in Memphis? Who sings that? Did he get shot in the face of the Dixieland? Singer Mark Cohn. And by what? Known for the 1991 smash hit Walking in Memphis. Oh, it was a shootout. Yeah.

I think he survived. I don't know how well he's doing. How do you get shot in the head and survive? It was an attempted carjacking. Car what? You got- You got the valets and the Dixaloon are crazy. What are you doing, dog?

Stop. Stop. He won a Grammy, best new artist car jackie you think dick stallone has a ballet service yeah dude that's where the college hunks moonlight this is weird oh. You guys hear that? It's our number five seed, Dave being in on Harry Potter. Versus our number four seed. Oops.

Wrong soundboard. Versus our number four seed, welcome to Wilmont. Were you on spooky season? I was. I'm working numerous boards right now. It's hard, folks. It's hard. It's hard when someone's game show has 90% of your board.

This is a hard matchup for me because Wilmonds has been a bit that has taken a backseat as of late, whereas Dave being in on Harry Potter has been just soaring up the charts lately. Wilmonds is a blue blood. Yeah. Traditional power. Like, they got the nod to get in the tournament just because of their overall resume, not because of just the season. I'm going to go Wilmonds.

Wow. I'm going to vote for myself being in on Harry Potter because I want Will to have to decide here. Well, being that our financial situation at Wilmont's is not great right now, I think we need all the publicity we can get. So I'm going to keep it going until Monday. What happened? Did Tide do something? He left for the saloon.

Tide's taking the leave of absence right now. The saloon? Yeah. Hired him away? Yeah, I bear hugged him. We caught Tide one night. We caught Tide one night. We caught Tide one night. He missed his shift, and we walked over to the Dick's Saloon,

and he had tie-dye chaps on. Was he on the mechanical bull? That's how we got pink eye. It wasn't a bull. It was a guy named Bull. Mm-hmm. Our final matchup of the day, number eight,

in person, J-Bone. What do you mean? You don't impress the name me. That's not how I talk. Versus number one, what's the damage? You're part of Bone Nation.

J-Bone called into our Patreon Friday voicemails like two weeks ago. Go check it out. There's a dude, I don't know who this dude is, but he's president of the J-Bone fan club

maybe the Bozos and he responds to all of my Lad Football Bruv tweets about Manchester United and I don't like to admit this because I like to

you know criticize J-Bone as much as I can this guy has great takes he's got my favorite takes my favorite soccer takes on Twitter are from a J-Bone

branded fake account makes me happy but with that being said i'm taking what's the damage this is an easy matchup for me it's so crazy to me that what's the damage took out bloody crime scene um yeah what's the damage is a really funny bit also a very new bit yeah month old maybe my favorite part of the bit was just the inception of it when uh i don't even know what you were talking about but i could see you not wanting to actually admit what

the damage was when dave started pressing on what the damage actually was was it about my tv that i dropped probably when you were trying to mount it and you became a 90 guy i've mounted many tvs so even if you count that one as a failure still well well above 90. I don't think there's any counting it as a failure. I mean, it was. Well, I mounted it. Then I took it off because I had to attach the soundbar to it. Then I tried to rehang it. The soundbar

sounds good, by the way. Thank you. It was really popping during the halftime show. It was. Thank you, David. I missed it. I was watching the halftime show at the crib, so thanks for the delay. Yeah, dude, we were all real upset that you, David. I missed it. I was watching the halftime show at the crib, so thanks for the invite. Yeah, dude, we were all real upset that you left early. You know what? It's time.

That's messed up. Oh, yeah, what's the damage? I'm voting for that. Sorry, Jared. You're my favorite F1 personality, not named Will. This Weekend in Fun, presented by Bird Dogs. You guys know what Bird Dogs are. You've seen them wearing them everywhere.

You might catch me, depending on the temperature tomorrow, you might catch me rocking some Bird Dogs out to the course tomorrow. Are you kidding? No, I'm a savage when it comes to it. I just live in Bird Dogs. I live, eat, and breathe Bird Dogs. Talking about their pants and shorts and not actual Bird Dogs, that'd be fucked up.

I mean, I really like their stuff too, but that seems a little excessive. Yeah, you don't have to eat it. If you do order bird dogs and you do want to eat it, that's kind of on you, but I didn't recommend doing it. Just wear it, really. It's all you need to do. Yeah. They got khakis.

They got gym shorts. They got everything. And they got built-in silky soft inner liners that never ride up. I was wearing some navy blue johns out on the course the other day, and Dylan hit them with the khakis. Man, I lost... No one has ever gotten that excited about the other day and Dylan hit him with the khakis. Man, I lost. No one has ever gotten that excited about the word khakis.

I lost my short Johns. I mentioned this a couple weeks ago, I think. I still can't. I'm still on the lookout. Dude, I got a lot at my crib. You probably have mine. Probably left them over there. Maybe.

During that summer party. Actually, I took them at your bachelor party. Much like I stole Will's stuff at Mike's. Well, no. Remember, you tried to sneak him into the Dick's Saloon during the anything but clothes

party the ABC party we had and then we made yeah we made you take him off so maybe maybe they did get put in my

gym bag they're at the Lost and Found at the Dick's Saloon yeah okay if you're in need

of anything this summer you're in need of a pair of bird dogs I don't care if you're wearing the shorts you can swim in these

things you can run in these things or you can just straight out go in goblin mode in these things. Whatever you want to do. Go to birddogs.com, enter promo code CIRCLING, and they'll throw in a free bird dogs beanie. Again, that's birddogs.com, promo code CIRCLING, and boom, a free bird dogs beanie with your pair of bird dogs.

Stay warm and comfortable in your bird dogs. Dylan, what are you doing this weekend? Thank you for asking me, Will. Friday, I will be at the Dell Match Play. The match play weather should be very very nice i cannot wait i'm gonna do some uh social media coverage out there have a good time drink a little tito's probs it's gonna be great man i'm just so excited what dave that sentence you just uttered was just very, very young and hip of you. Yeah. You're going to do some social media and drink some Tito's Probs. I'm 38 years old.

If you see Dylan out there, do not hesitate to scream at the top of your lungs from afar, fuck you, Dorn. Please don't do that. There are probably kids around. Do it while JT's about to putt. Yeah. Offer JT some tips on how to approach a- You good? A chip.

He loves that. He's going to end up getting a bunch of people telling him how to chip this week. Yeah. He's going to hate Austin. Is that a new clip? I think it was from the last week's tournament. Oh, really? Yeah.

Okay. Yeah, the Valspar. Yeah, Valspar. On Saturday, I have three one-year-old birthday parties to attend. That's too many. That's simply too many. One of them is my niece. So a very, very happy birthday to Quinn,

my lovely little niece. Excited for that one. Quinn walking yet? Because last time I saw Quinn, very close. I'm not sure. I don't think so. Not yet. We'll find out.

Yeah, she's getting there for sure. So yeah, my Saturday is all about little kids, man. Little birthday parties. And that's pretty much it. Pretty much it. Sunday's open. I'll for sure call you, dude. You never do.

I literally do. We literally had dinner last weekend because I reached out to you. Oh yeah, that's true. That's fair. Just to be crystal clear. That's fair. What's that boy getting into i'm also going to be making an appearance at the dell match play doing some social media drinking some tito's prob

things of that nature um man it's gonna be pretty low-key we'll see how my allergies hold up as you can tell and i'm gonna apologize in this segment i've not been able to kick this cough and it's back you tried sipping codeine i would love to will but it's just i i don't think you want me potting on the codeine i think you're mistaken i would absolutely absolutely love an episode where Dave is just faded. He's just double cupped over there, just sipping. That would be an all-timer. But we'll see. Traditionally, I've only been able to do two days at the Dell Match play due to the spring allergies just popping off.

Nobody cares about that, though. I care about your allergies. What they really care about is me out at the driving range working on my wedges. And that's what I'm going to be doing Saturday. You going glove on or glove off for that work? 50 yards and under, glove off. 50 yards north of 50 yards longer

is another way of putting it. Glove. My buddy told me to practice your chipping in your wedges with no glove on. That's what will terrorize your glove the most. So you might as well just get used to not doing it. Didn't hate that tip. Dylan's never worn a glove. 100 in, no glove.

David, stop. Black Guerrero. He was making a prophylactic joke, I think. It's a spring roll joke. Sorry. Yeah, what are you talking about? Spring roll joke. It's a callback.

What's wrong with y'all? You're the one with your head in the gutter. It's locker room talk over there from Dylan. Just looking at maps with Kid Rock and... Jessica Simpson? No. What are you doing? I will be out at Dell.

Thursday night is the marquee event of my weekend where we are going to Longhorn Steakhouse with Randy for his two-year anniversary. Sorry, Randy. I haven't told Bay about that. I will be ordering something. Tomahawk? Not sure. And then Friday, I will be out at Dell Match Play. Peahouse?

Very excited about it. Maybe a Peahouse. Porterhouse, David. I will be going out to Dell Match Play. Peahouse? Very excited about it. Maybe a Peahouse. Porterhouse, David. I will be going out to Dell Match Play as well. Very excited about that. Then Friday night, got a little resi for some Thai food. My cousin's coming into town for Match Play, so we're going to go head out and eat some Thai food

and probably crash pretty early because that stuff will get you. Remember that spring rolls are unpredictable. Can't forget that. I feel like they're just very predictable. Nah, they're unpredictable. When's the last time you predicted one? Yeah. I don't need them.

Never. Do it right now. I don't need them. Exactly. You won't. Saturday, I think I might be getting a little early lunch at Matt's El Rancho and then just kind of straight chilling throughout the day. Maybe take my cousin around, see some sights.

And then I got a little reservation that night as well. Just going to be a full uh family weekend shout out dana for coming into town so i'm very excited about that and then sunday pure recovery day just hanging out chilling with the the little man who knows i think it's an international break not a lot of footy on we don't have any f1 this weekend right they're not going back to bag do we like like jordan 96 97 tell me tell me what the next f1 race is dave because daddy's horny for it it's a dope reference though dylan thank you drake this track we do have one this weekend what where is it seriously well i don't dude except the cookies david can we just

universally accept cookies get the cookies in there. Oh, daddy wants a cookie. Give me a cookie. Cookie crisp. Saudi Arabia? I don't know. How long would it take Kid Rock to point out Saudi Arabia on a map? It is Saudi Arabia. Does Kid Rock find Saudi Arabia before Joe Biden gets that Bluetooth set up?

Is Lewis Hamilton protesting? No. Might be. I don't know. It'd be dumb of him. He's got some thoughts on Saudi Arabia. That's all I'm saying. What are they?

Like such as? Can you break down the nuances of that? No. Okay. Is it because they won't produce more oil? He's just anti-OPEC.

I don't think that's what it's about. Okay. I'm anti-MOPAC. Slow today. Don't like that. Yeah, it's time. Evil MOPAC is my least favorite Twitter account. It's time to call it.

You probably laugh at every single evil MOPAC joke on Twitter. I don't, but they're on the TL quite a bit. I hate it. Pretty relatable. Had to mute them they stink bye bye