Circling Back - Harry Styles & EmRata Headlines & Mammoth Meatballs

Episode Date: March 29, 2023

No timestamps, just vibes. Harry Styles and Emily Ratajkowski got caught making out, they're making Woolly Mammoth meatballs, hot crane operators, an update on last year's fishing scandal, This Weekend in Fun, and so much more. Enjoy a free two-week trial on Patreon for additional weekly episodes: ⁠www.patreon.com/circlingbackpodcast⁠ Watch all of our full episodes on our new YouTube channel — ⁠www.youtube.com/circlingback⁠  Shop Washed Merch: ⁠www.washedmedia.shop⁠  Support This Episode’s Sponsors Rhoback: ⁠www.rhoback.com⁠ (BACKER20 for 20% off) Squarespace: ⁠www.squarespace.com/steam⁠ (STEAM for 10% off your purchase of a website or domain) Nutrafol: ⁠www.nutrafol.com/men⁠ (CIRCLING for $15 off) Fast Growing Trees: ⁠www.fastgrowingtrees.com/circling⁠ (15% off) --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/circling-back/message Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

All right, we're back, Circling Back podcast, coming to you live from Austin, Texas. My name's Will DeFries, to my left, David Ruff. You know, I wanted to clear up some rumors about me and my personal life, which I normally don't talk about, but a number of people have responded to an Instagram story I posted yesterday being like, dude, what are you doing? What are you doing in a tanning bed um for people who aren't on that new shit that 2000 and new shit that i'm on that was not a tanning pad uh i was at my therapist my red light therapist undergoing red light therapy why what are you doing with that what's that about i was gonna be my question i was gonna go cryo but the cryo machine was down so like you want to do that and i was like i guess

i'll try i've never done it is that is that when you get in a big chamber you just cry for like 10-15 minutes cryo like a cathartic like you know therapeutic just let your emotions no catheter involved yeah there's no work where speaking of have you seen the new sydney sweeney ford collab hey get back to the red light shit what does it do? It's just good for your shit. What kind of shit? Really, you poop better because you did red light therapy. Actually? I don't discuss that publicly.

No, but what are the benefits? So I don't have to look it up. The hot new thing in skincare is red light therapy. The masks, people like my sister got one for Christmas. I'm outing my sister, but my parents got the mask you put on for like five minutes a night. Dude, I love that movie. Dude, I'm always like mask on, mask off.

You want to know where I got this mask? It's a different one. It's a totally different. Nobody cared until I got the mask. Is that it? I don't remember. No. I'm conflating.

Somebody stop me. The Jim Carrey movie, The Mask. Cameron Diaz, also in that movie. Very hot in that movie. Ah-hooga! That's me reading

the Harry Styles rumors. Are you just dealing with that? I know. We should write headlines about that. Mike S. on Twitter yesterday yesterday scrizzle 32 said huberman is a clown and cold plunges offer no proven medical or performance benefits pseudoscience placebo effect anyone stop being sheep what oh you're a sheep you know what's funny about that really dude he tagged your ass too he tagged me in it but i didn't see it because i was in red light therapy

you're on that pseudo shit dude sign me up i'll try like i said yesterday you will try anything i will disclose a little bit about what went down on patreon yesterday that is my i am on a try anything to feel better journey y'all been y'all you've been on that since grand x days though i know it's an ongoing journey it's it's more of a quest really dave's a sucker for anything out there dave was almost a trendsetter at grand x sometimes like dave started getting in ketosis and suddenly like other people in the bullpen were in ketosis dave dabbled in ketosis. He was in it for like five minutes. Dude, I was there, man. You never been there.

You never made the bigs. We peed on strips, remember? We did. That was a good moment. I wasn't in ketosis. No, I wasn't either. As I've never tried to be in ketosis. It would be weird if you were.

I think I've only been in ketosis like twice. Did you do keto? I think I've eaten a keto-friendly diet. I don't think I've ever intentionally gone full keto. Mash that keto button. I definitely was in ketosis at some point during hole 30 but usually i'm in my bag around hole 13 dylan chivery ladies and gentlemen i got a headache right when i sat down started talking to you guys it hit like instantly when you hit record.

I don't know what it is. I'm allergic to you idiots or something. That's fine. Okay. Take it off. I'm still going to fucking bring it up. Take it off. Go home.

Get out of here. These people want my headlines today. They want my Emrata, Harry Styles, Olivia Wilde headlines. I'm the headline guy. You're calling it. Your headlines are wild. Oh, it's a play. Just wait and find out, folks, because I got a little something for y'all wow i got something for your bitch ass too okay am i not part of the

blanket y'all that everyone's getting something with too my head hurts i was having fun on twitter last night man oh that's because you're mega horny for one certain person in the world i don't know if that's what it is i took a photo last night i meant to tweet it i was in desperate need of a pledge yesterday yeah dude i've been getting dms from people that are picking up pizzas i played i played my card last night and i set them down i was like man this jet's just kind of leaning against the slope Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Especially like... Slope of the seat. What if we even the odds? Here's the thing though. When I drive, I'd like to sit sideways.

So my pizza is not only tilted back, it's tilted to the side. We can get you two pledges. It's doing... It's like I'm up on two wheels almost. We can get you two pledges. That'd be good. We can get you a whole class of pledges. Oh, the pledges.

Yeah, the pledges. Mm-hmm. Oh, you don't have a cigarette in your pot? You don't have a lighter on you? Oh, I pudges Yeah, the pudges Oh, you don't have a cigarette in your pot? You don't have a lighter on you? Oh, I'm sorry Go sit on the wall Did I get made to offend for assaulting you? Oh, were you going to go tell the headmaster that I spanked you with a paddle?

Yeah Are you going to tell him that your pledge name is Pitstains? Did you have a broken clavicle when I threw you off the balcony? Are you mad because I made you come over and fill my bathtub with Powerade and talk to me while I was hungover? Little Pledge. That happens. Does your stomach still hurt from getting pumped last night? Are you mad because we used 40 of your swipes the other day in one day?

We used all your food plan during welcome week. You have nothing to eat. Who are the founders? Yeah, you haven't memoized it yet. Memoized. Oh, it's so bad.

Fuck those pledges. Terrible class. class terrible pledge class seriously tweet that photo dog i'm trying to get the photo out fool trying to make sure there's not any uh credit card information on this on this receipt yeah that'd be good that'd be good you don't print your number your whole number anything you. Yeah. They just do the last four digits, which are sometimes really important. Man. We could use one of our identities to get stolen. How about Dylan?

It'd be good for content. Yeah. Where the fuck are the pledges at? Is that your caption for your tweet? It could be. I'm workshopping it. Okay. We got a loaded episode.

Absolutely filthy loaded episode. Just smothered in content. And then drizzled with more content. So in that vein, we're going to get some official announcements out of the way. First and foremost, yesterday we did exactly five minutes, a podcast where we talk about things for exactly five minutes. It's not a five-minute podcast. I could understand how you would think that, but it's not.

It's actually about 60 minutes. Numerous five-minute segments. It's not a podcast about 60 minutes to CBS show. It's just a 60-minute podcast. I know things are confusing. I get it. It's on Patreon. Right now, we're doing a free 14-day trial for new patrons.

We would love to earn your business. Go sign up. You get two weeks free. You can get the penultimate episode of Love Island Boys from last week, and you can get the finale for this week, or you can just get listener voicemails on Thursdays. If you go full opto, you get everything. You can get

exactly five minutes or touching based on Tuesdays. You can get Randy's game show. You can get listener voicemails. You can get everything we do. Also, go subscribe on YouTube. YouTube.com slash circling back. And finally, go shop the Washed Shop. Go to washedmedia.shop. This week, we will not have video. A lot of you follow us on Instagram and you follow Randy on Instagram. If you do, you saw yesterday that Randy's father passed away this week. It was a sad day in Washed Media. We love Randy. Randy's been a big part of our team

for the last three years. And you hate to see these things happen. And so our thoughts are with Randy. He'll be back at some point next week. But until then, we'll be going no video. Love you, Randall. We love you, Randy. We're sorry that you have to go through this. Without further ado, let's hear from our friends over at mutual you don't have to choose between better hair growth and your health boys what if i told you there's a holistic solution for men that promotes healthier hair and whole body wellness would that interest the red light guy over here i was gonna say does this involve some kind of contraption that i have

to stand in or is this just like no dave what if I told you they would just send it to your place, dog? Whoa. Sign me up. Nutrafol is the number one dermatologist recommended hair growth supplement, clinically shown to improve hair growth, thickness, and visible scalp coverage. You guys know that I'm a dermatologist, boy. I was late for a recent meeting that we had because I was at the dermatologist getting my skin checked. You're a dermatologist, boy. Yes. She asked if I took anything and I was like, well, take Nutrafol. And she was like, oh, that's great. And I was like, oh, yes. Usually I come in here and I'm nervous. I'm anxious that I'm not doing stuff well enough for myself. My whole body health and wellness.

Can I share like a little side effect that it's done for me? I think we know just based on the look in your eye right now, this dude's horny. I mean, I don't want to put it that way, but like, the libido has had a noticeable uptick. So,

I'll just, hey, I'll stop there, folks. But this guy is, is that the guy that sang Mambo No. 5? Mm-hmm. Yeah.

Libido? Mm-hmm. Libido. That's good. That'd be a good stage name anyway yeah it's maybe uh yeah made you what no it's it's it's has numerous benefits why do you have to take everything down that road i want to hair's getting thicker i would love to give a special shout out to their uh nutraceuticals they go beyond genetics to multi-target the root causes of thinning

including stress hormones nutrition metabolism you know that metabo can get all messed up but you got to make that happen you know uh we also have aging lifestyle it's just whole body health in general physician formulated using natural medical grade ingredients neutrophils drug-free patented technology provides consistent, reliable results without compromising your sexual health. And in a clinical study, men showed progressive improvement in hair growth and thickness after three and six months. This stuff's just working pretty quickly. I think a very underrated thing about Nutrafol is that it's in a beautiful container. You leave that thing on the kitchen or on the bathroom sink. You don't have to worry about that thing looking ugly.

It is kind of sleek now that you mention it. It sounds cool when you open it and shut it too. It's like there's something really special in this. There is. And there is. It's basically like your key to hair growth. You too can grow thicker, healthier hair and support the show by going to Nutrafol.com, entering promo code CIRCLING

to save $10 off your first month subscription. This offer is only available to U.S. customers for a limited time, plus free shipping on every order. Get $10 off at Nutrafol.com, spelled N-U-T-R-A-F-O-L.com, promo code circling. Headlines, headlines. We're going to do some original headlines dude that sounds great headlines dude dude that sounds great that was a huge leap of faith uh that that button had the headlines

yeah i was very worried that that did not work i'll show you the top button. So what's this one about, man? Well, we don't slut shame around here. We slut celebrate. And our girl Emrata is in an absolute tear in the best of ways. Pete Davidson, that's a notch on the belt. Eric Andre? Dude. Has that been confirmed? I don't know.

Yes, dude. They took naked photos together. I still wouldn't be amazed. It wouldn't surprise me if this just came out as an Eric Andre show skit at some point. It was a publicity stunt, I think. You think they actually smashed that? There's no way she was hooking up with that dude. You think they actually smashed him?

You don't go from that dude to Styles. Isn't she into like unattractive dudes? Wasn't that a thing? I don't know. I did some really bad research. I thought her ex-husband was... He was kind of like a... He was handsome.

He was like... Yeah, he wasn't hot, hot, but a he was like yeah he wasn't hot hot but like he was like b davidson's oh shit that dude's got swagger what b davidson's not a hot man you know that's your opinion that is very very lukewarm take yeah that's your opinion litigated this no he's got big dick energy though per new york magazine 2021 for him granted but he's not a lot of ladies like traditionally handsome a lot of ladies like him well she was recently caught making out with harry styles that's a hot man not the hottest makeout if i have to be honest you wanted more it just wasn't

like it was almost like they were like they needed to be somewhere so they were like let's sneak a makeout in rather than being like let's stand right here and make out. They look like two kids outside of a movie theater waiting for their parents to pick them up. It looked like my first kiss where I got cut on the lip by her braces. I bled afterwards. That's hot. Braces?

Put your lip? My first kiss was in my closet in my house. Really? Yeah. You playing Seven Minutes in Heaven? That game always creeped me out straight up. my first kiss was in my was in my closet in my house really yeah you're playing seven minutes in heaven that game always creeped me out straight up no i wasn't but we never played that game like i feel like it got pitched a couple times but then i had this feeling in my head that like if a girl had to go in the closet with me i just imagined her being like i don't want to go in there with will and i'd be like sitting there like yo why you gotta do me like that damn don't do will like

that yeah why does it do me like that hypothetical girl i bet you're a good smoocher i i don't think i'm a bad one you get those pouty lips get over here no but now i got that that fur on top of my lip i got that mustache in the way yeah what's that like kissing a dude with a full-ass beard i've never kissed a dude i'm not sure either yeah i've never kissed a dude with a full-ass beard curious now though i sally doesn't like it when i have the the hair that goes like over the lip oh i don't like it either it gets in my head yeah you gotta trim that up yeah i think a way to do it i might go mustache i'm getting a haircut today maybe i'll just lop off the bottom part you're not going to what if i do you're not

you should go you should go louis ck go t but you don't have to call it louis ck if you want to avoid like do i have to jack off into plants as well no no i was gonna say you don't have to call it louis ck if you want to avoid like do i have to jack off into plants as well no i was gonna say you don't have to do that there's other places to do that right like in the privacy of your own home without you know your fans there in a plant well it's kind of respectful to do it in a plant in a way could have done other places that were more disrespectful that's true the whole scenario is not great for him. Not a good look. No, I still haven't watched his special.

Yeah, I'm having trouble diving into... If there's one thing I've been having trouble doing, it's been diving back into the content of comedians who've had some tough stuff going on. Never a big D'Elia guy. No, it wasn't either. Actually, to be honest, before his whole thing, I didn't like him at all.

Louis C.K.'s shit was pretty egregious, wasn't it i didn't i to be honest before he his whole thing i didn't like him at all louis ck's shit was pretty egregious wasn't it i think so but somehow i think i think he's waiting the storm as it goes yeah yeah yeah what about what about disease is how's he doing i didn't didn't aziz get vindicated everyone's like yeah he's not a pervert he's just really awkward i didn't know there was allegations i was just trying to get you to do the aziz voice what both things are true okay oh but yeah i think he was i don't know if i don't even know if he like he wasn't like yeah i don't know i don't like i think it was a stretch i think i think aziz is like everyone was kind of yeah okay like maybe we're maybe we took that too far yeah okay who knows we're not here to cancel people we're here to talk about people making out because that's what we like to do big fan of most so like who made out though uh harry styles you know that

you just wrote headlines about it and emily ratajkowski okay emirata you familiar with her familiar with her game yeah i'd say i'm familiar my headlines suck it's because i didn't think we were doing this segment and so i wrote mine in five minutes let's if i if i if i beat your headlines dylan that means that you stink that's fair i i don't feel that i don't feel super strong about my headies who wants to start off i'll get one out of the way okay i'm gonna get my shitty ones out of the way first okay you ready two girls one d harry styles finds himself in star-studded love triangle. Oh, wow. 1D, like one direction. Okay.

But also like there's a play on like D. You get it? And you're also doing a two girls, one cup reference. Right. There's a lot going on. You always shoehorn that into the show, two girls, one cup thing. It's like- You did it yesterday literally out of nowhere.

That's on your bingo card. No. Why is that on your bingo card what's up with that that was a good headline it was fine that was good it was good it was honestly way better come up with that shit it was way better than i thought it was gonna be it could have gotten oh that's good this makes me have less faith in my headlines okay you want me to go yeah i don't have very many i'm gonna i'm gonna do i'm gonna play some hits i'm gonna start out and i'm gonna get into some new stuff harry and amrata are in some pretty wild rumors y'all olivia wild with an e feather cap it's actually wheel day oh is it will they freeze well he wanted her to

change it and start pronouncing it like that so kind of where brett did want us to note that he did come up with one of these yesterday when we pitched doing this segment and his was more like watermelon sugar by harry styles bids adieu to olivia wilde okay golf clap it's fine uh mine is my my first couple suck let's get them out of the way okay okay harry styles more like burying smiles into each other's faces. Terrible. Okay. I told you the worst one. The worst one's going first.

The worst one's going first. You always lead with a battle. That's the rule here. You got to do that. Dylan, give us a good one. This is not my best, but here we go. Imrata spotted sucking face with Harry Styles in Tokyo. Wait, what does she see in this guy?

Because he's quite a captain now. Okay, I get that. That was worse than your first one. Your first one was good. This one was not very good. Go back, reread it as if you were doing a weekend update and you're Norm MacDonald. I just deleted it because it's off my list now

press ctrl z player like imagine not knowing how to do that ctrl z oh it's back okay thank you what's our man doing like i'm norm mcdonald yeah i don't know if i'm good at norm mcdonald just try you never know till you try this is gonna suck i don't want to do it i don't want to do it let's just move all right all right no do it go ahead dave all right this is uh more of an opinion piece not to be a downer but these hairy amrata rumors are the only thing keeping me going wow okay you okay that sounds are you good you're pathetic are you good okay go ahead well turns out m rata is setting up shop in harry's house that's the two suck face in tokyo that stinks not no it's not it's not it's not that's my that's my second worst one i feel better

about all the ones that i have now is harry's House an album name? It is the, it won, I think it won Album of the Year, Dave. I've heard of it. Is that the one where it's upside, the room's upside down? Yeah, if I,

I'll be honest. I enjoyed the album. I listened to the album numerous times. Album of the Year seems like a stretch to me. It was fine. I have a horny one.

Sign me up. You see these pics? I think Harry was eating a little more than watermelon in Tokyo. Jesus. I was horny. Like sushi. Good thing there's no video. It's like sushi.

He's in Tokyo. They probably have like bomb ass sushi. They do have bomb ass sushi. Yeah, probably, Dylan. You think? Oh, you think Japan has good sushi? Probably. Oh, you don't want to eat leftover sushi from last week?

Off your plates, brother? You don't want to eat the grocery store sushi that we got from the dumpster out back? Grocery store sushi is never good. No, no. I disagree. Sometimes it hits. In a pinch, it'll work. If you really, really want sushi and you're in a pinch, I'll do it.

Yeah. Because it's really like all the same ingredients, right? Yeah. But they always... Never mind, actually. But it tastes like grocery store. It does. Yeah.

It makes sense. They give you that little tiny thing of soy sauce. It's not real. And there's nowhere to put it. They give you the packet. I need five times as much. That particular soy sauce packet, when you open it, the soy sauce is so not there's nowhere to put it they give you the packet and it's five times as much yeah that particular soy sauce packet when you open it the soy sauce is so thin it just immediately pours out why do they put it in a packet why do they put it in a packet and not

into like a little like you know the ranch containers from papa john's why don't they put it in one of those so you can actually dip your sushi in it like this doesn't make sense i don't know man did we already talk about how like there's no real wasabi in the united states is that true i what's this fake i don't care because i don't like wasabi we can't something about like it doesn't grow here or like it doesn't have the shelf life so we have to use like wasabi flavoring you can't import it again i don't know what the fuck i'm talking about i don't listen to me all my wasabi do you really yeah you actually don't eat wasabi in the states if you've had it from japan you would know what i'm talking about all right i was actually i was

actually taking a walk the other day and i saw this absolute shoddy walking next to me and i was like damn wasabi it was your wife okay really yeah so i said bae. Oh, that's cool. Yeah. Damn, Emily. You really put that Radek Oblowski on your friend's ex like that. Radek Oblowski. Yeah. Okay. Okay, we're heating up.

Heating up. What you got, Will? Hey, to the paparazzi parked out front trying to catch Harry Styles and Emrata smooching. Maybe you should just keep driving. I mean, that's a lyric, probably. That's the song name. Maybe you should just keep driving. All right, I got one. Emrata throws away friendship with Olivia Wilde over a boy.

That's One Direction to go. Were they friends yes apparently her source you know like look one direction was a like a boy group boy band that he was in a boy group boy band a group of boys where one direction it's one direction to go hey isn't selena gomez dating uh who's she dating and she dating one of the guys from there. Is it something else? I don't, again, I'm just wrong today. Yeah. We're old.

I don't know who she's dating. I tried to, I was trying to research this while y'all were recording and I was just like, just go into the worst websites, just the worst. All right. Who's up? You. I'm so hornyny I could die reading these M. Rada, Olivia Wilde, Harry Styles

three-way rumors. Okay. Okay. That sounds fun. That's good. You ever been there? I've never been that horny, no. You've never been on the doorstep of death? Never so horny that I was on the brink of death.

Please, give me one scrap. Harry, just tell us what happened. Tell us what happened, Harry. One crumb of detail. Will, what you got? More like music for a smoochy restaurant. Harry Styles and Emrata seem kissing IRL. IRL. Okay. Okay. harry styles and emrata seem kissing irl irl okay okay get it because it's like sushi but smoochy get it she was smooching with everybody she was she was smooching here we go harry styles spotted

canoodling with emrata uh i don't think sushi was the only thing he was eating. You already said this one. It's the same joke. It's a different one. Dude, I rearranged it. I used watermelon in the other one. Nah, I don't know, dude. I don't think that. Sushi was the only thing he was eating. Congrats, dude. You plagiarized yourself.

Nah, fool. It was totally different. Oh, man, that's bad. Did you chat GPT years? Oh, we should do that. I'm very curious what that would pump out. They're going to suck. They are not good. All right, let's do that. I'm very curious what that would pump out. They're going to suck. They are not good.

All right, let's do one that'll go viral. He's calling a shot. Emrata and Olivia Wilde engaged in quite the Tokyo Rift. Damn. Not a drift. That's good, dude. It is a rift. That's good.

A Tokyo rift. Right, like the movie. Like the movie that none of them had anything to do with. But still, a movie. But they were in Tokyo. A movie that exists was filmed there. Will, you're doing Chad GDP, aren't you? They're going in one direction, and that's the bedroom.

Harry absolutely crashed the boards and rebounds with Emily Ratajkowski. Damn. Damn. You're in your bag on that one. I'm not. They're fine. My next two suck. Tastes like strawberries on a summer evening,

and it sounds like two chicks getting that business from Harry. I'm going to chill. Relax. Where did that come from harry it started so innocent it got so aggressive so quickly getting that business from dude it got so aggressive yeah yeah uh-huh that was fucking good jesus dave do you want to follow the business rumor has it m rata and olivia wild are sharing one direction minus the dir wow action it's an erection that's good uh-huh wow you could have said minus 1d then it's erection i just wrote it like 30 seconds ago there's there's multiple plays there brothers

levels yeah will you got anything left not much not much emily ratajkowski takes it to the Emily Harry Housky in a public most sesh. That's fucking, that's gas. Emily Harry Housky. I'll just have one more and it's probably not even worth sharing. It's not very good. Same with my final one. All right. I'll do it anyway.

Somehow extremely talented, wildly attractive, mega rich musician able to pick up hot babes there he goes you could read that it's a good angle it's a different angle barrel no no no and that that's all i have that was a good one um man i saved my absolute worst for last let me see uh this one has to be read in an accent so forgive me hot young bloke harry styles seen snogging little pocket rocket emeralda. That's fucking good. It's good. It's good.

There's a visual for that, but y'all can't see it. It's good. Then my actual last one. I don't know why I even put this in a Word document. Opinion. Damn, Harry. You crazy for this one. Opinion.

Opinion. Yeah. What? Are you guys familiar with the business that emily ratajkowski owns i am not she owns a swimsuit company that's my swimsuit company yes yeah i've heard of it's called ina marotta none of their stuff fits me. Yeah. Yeah. It's pretty slinky. Ina Murata. More like Polly Murata. Possible threesome with Olivia Wilde and Harry Styles? Damn. Polly.

Damn. Polygamy. It's a big polygamy scene in Austin. I finished Waco last night, by the way. Wow. Did you read the good book, too? Speaking of polygamy. Dylan.

Tib-a-do? Where's Tibs? Tibs, go check the window, Tibs. Did you like it? That was so sad, man. I didn't remember all the details of how that went down. Yeah. Of course, the David Koresh, Branch Davidian situation in Waco.

Thank you. You're not talking about the motorcycle shootout at twin peaks no they're completely different almost that's tragic yeah so sad man my gosh do you have any headlines are you prepared for it there are no winners in that one didn't you say you were in waco like at some rally is that what like inspired it like over the weekend like you were up there for some kind of like i don't know no no i tried to go to waco oh no you had to stay in town this weekend because you had roundup is that this weekend that was last weekend you know you knew that oh what yeah i saw a video of you on on barstool hook them bobbing your head to waka flaka at sigap well i heard barstool chugs was gonna be there he's everywhere dude chugged one on stage with waka yeah dude he can drink a zillion beers

i know it's fucking sick yeah it's fucking sick i can only drink like three these days i can't even imagine that many i had i had two guinness and a mickey bang bang with jr hickey the nice touch guy right like three beers three beers gets your boy fucking there at this point we're getting old college me would be like what's your problem dog i like it this way though yeah it's better especially you know dave's trying to watch his figure. He doesn't want to drink too many. Do you get it though? It's music for a smoochy restaurant. No, yeah. Like you replaced sushi with smoochy.

They sound kind of alike. Hey, not to take this like down a serious road, but is this alleged threesome the hottest threesome of all time? Like I'm sure there's been some like other ones. You sent me that one a couple of weeks ago. Was it X Hamster you were sending me? This is definitely a tier one threesome. It is definitely tier – oh, obviously T1. But I'm just curious like where it ranks among other great threesomes in history. Hardest threesomes in history.

I'm trying to think. I'm trying to think. This is pulling up a bunch of websites that I probably i'm not gonna give this some time like what's like yeah what's like the first one uh porn hub okay i'm not familiar with that one um it's a hub for other ones a lot of x's in the in the name okay yeah i'm just gonna yeah is that a work computer can we see that can we see that is it the one that's like a play on youtube like the name youtube but it's something else i don't i don't my tubes i don't know dave my tubes my tubes that ladies and gentlemen was headlines you will not get a better headline segment anywhere in the world we're gonna play an audio drop david i can't fucking hear it you stepped on it dog it's my own voice why are you stepping

on your own fucking audio drop my guy do you want me to just do it live and i mean if you want to it's fun headlines we all need some headlines fucking headlines it's headlines david that sounds great why did you say that why did you punctuate it like that i mean it makes the drop but i'm just curious which what that that sounds great because i know how to fucking it wasn't that good i know how to fucking podcast bitch i hope so take notes man i hope so i am i got my word doc open all right write it down i'm gonna type it in i'm gonna type it in punctuate out of nowhere. For emphasis. This is called cocky typing.

Something smells a little fishy. Oh, it's probably that smoochy restaurant on his left. I was sitting at Matt's All Rancho the other day. You guys familiar with this place? Obviously, man. I was sitting there. Something I've never seen before. I saw a guy sitting with his wife,

older couple, 60s. And he had his iPad out. I've had my iPad out at a restaurant. I'm not going to act like I've never done that before. I've done it once or twice. This guy had his iPad out and he was watching bass fishing. This dude was different.

Different. Completely ignoring his wife, watching bass fishing. Imagine being that married to the game. But dude, I think... You his wife watching bass fishing. Imagine being that married to the game. But dude, I think... You can bet on bass fishing. Really? Maybe he had a parlay.

The world of competitive bass fishing is something I don't know very much about, but I bet it's so just wild ass. Yeah, you've always said that you're more of an ass fishing guy. Yeah, that's true. I fish for ass, David. That's the joke there. Damn. Damn.

Watch the damn Danieliel voice i got it again with the white vans daniel it's a sassy reaction guy from europe dumb okay what's the point of your what you're saying will well apparently there's been some fishing news an update on the scandal that rocked the fishing world a few months ago where somebody was caught putting little pellets into the fish just correct just dropping weights in i think they were also adding like fillets in the fish to fatten them up with like other fish meat that didn't come from that original fish. Okay. So fillets plus- How do they know that the fish weren't just out at a restaurant eating all-you-can-eat fish fillets before the competition?

See, that would have been my main point of their defense if I was defending them. All-you-can-eat fish fillets. Yeah. Yeah. I don't think they considered that angle. It's like dollar dog night at the ballpark. I saw somebody eat 12 hot dogs once it's too many hot dogs could you could you do a hot dog an inning on tv i could do a hot dog an inning there's small hot dogs i

wouldn't want to i could but you could perhaps i think i could yeah the hot dogs at ballparks go down easy and when you think about joey chestnut doing like x amount times that in like two minutes. Like we could absolutely do nine over an entire game. Catching a live baseball game is a tier one sporting event to catch live. My goal this season is to, I would like to go to a Texas baseball game this season. Honestly,

even more. I want to go to a Texas state baseball game this season. We can make that happen. That's a tier one baseball program. Can you get tickets? Do you have a plug for tickets to the Texas state baseball program? You just need to order them. You can buy them online for like five bucks.

No, no. You got to know a guy. Hard to get. You can just let people in. Hottest ticket in town. Go Bobcats. Eat them up. Let's become baseball groupies.

We like follow the team around. I think that's really time consuming. Yeah. We have families and stuff, but still. They'll understand. It's for content, allegedly. So what's the update on this thing? They pled guilty to cheating.

In front of who? A court of law. Really? There's an Ohio law on the books, seldom applied. Did they throw the book at them? You cannot, yeah. Because they took home prize money. Correct.

Legally. They cheated the game. I see. But this says that they had to, they got, their licenses have been suspended for three years, their fishing licenses. That's not enough. And they must give up their $100,000 fishing boat. So they didn't have to

give back their winnings? No, surely they did. I don't understand the second part of that. Like, you gotta sell the fishing boat. Well, why? Why? These two are idiots. Like who, was it two people?

Two guys who did it? Yeah, video. The risk of getting caught is not worth what they, I don't care how much money they took home, probably a lot, but it's not worth it. This happened around the same time as that scramble team that came in that was like, you was like 23 under.

That's like, where are you? Where are you guys? So question. Presumably when they weigh the fish at the end of these tournaments, they're not like cut open, right? Correct. Is that what gave them away? Like why are your fish cut like down the middle? No, but I think you could shove it down them if you wanted to.

Or through the mouth. Yeah, because they put the weights in the mouth. Oh. So I think like – I mean these guys, these people that are – I don't understand how they did this continually for like competition after competition. Because if they're putting this much weight into a fish, wouldn't a guy be able to like pull up a bass, look at it and be like, all right, this 18-inch bass weighs double what this other 18-inch one weighs over here. Something ain't right. 18 inch bass weighs double what this other 18 inch one weighs over here like i just feel like i feel like fish guys know without a shadow of a doubt like how much it's probably going to weigh when you just look at it i wonder how long they got out they got away with things didn't they win

like yeah they had been suspected in other tournaments too damn i think of as far as like the worst crowds to get caught cheating in front of like the fishing crowd like lucky there was no stabbing dude or right like they all have pocket knives on them all every one of them and probably a shotty in the truck if i'm watching this go down i'm i'm watching my side for stabbings like i i'm worried that i'm gonna get a knife in the stomach just get filleted i mean don't yeah i'm glad these guys got busted i'm glad we could finally tie a knot on that story only my true anglers will understand that one

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found out that we were getting that absolute bag from fast growing trees i was just happy i have trouble keeping plants alive but mainly that was because i wasn't really trying to find plants that were suited to my environment guess what they do just that yeah like it'll tell you like you put in your zip code and it'll tell you like your your uh your growing zone or like what zone you're in and like when you go look at a tree or a plant, it'll tell you, yeah, that one works where your climate is,

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today i mean i just saw this tweet yesterday and it struck a chord with me i don't know why i just found it to be really hilarious and i might be one of the only ones who finds it so funny but it's um the headline is i'm a female crane operator men stare at me constantly okay um. And that's just funny to me because when I think of a crane operator, they're just like a little speck up in the sky like in that little cab. You can't see them. You certainly can't see them. And surely they do come down at some point.

Like they walk down all those little steps to the bottom. And you're like, oh, there's the crane operator. I haven't seen you in the last eight hours because you've been up in the air the whole time but it's i find it funny you guys uh where do you guys stand on this there's a california crane school they've got they've got some of the highest pass rates in the country they've assisted thousands of individuals nationwide in earning their mobile crane operator certs dude i bet it's i bet it's fun for a little bit to be a crane operator yeah just moving big ass shit all around a job site think about that but you don't like heights right have you seen how no i couldn't do it but it would be fun like we should get a simulator a crane

operator i could do that a crane simi vr you like look down there's just a bunch of like just horny dudes staring at you from three to three hundred feet below do you know how they erect the cranes you know they like get taller and taller uh like uh they stack it like legos right it's fucking wild they i don't know they like it inserts pieces into itself it's fucking wild. I don't know. It inserts pieces into itself. It's fucking weird. Do they build it from the top down or the bottom up? How would you build it from the top down? What do you mean they insert it from another crane? They insert sections into themselves to get taller.

Is that all you have to do? Yeah. I mean, if you're a crane, yeah. It doesn't work for people. How do you know? I don't. Same way those guys get uh that heightening surgery where they get pieces of break your legs you get like four inches of like fibula added if the crane's not big enough can you stretch it yeah you could stretch

it too you can like pull on it enough that it gets bigger. Yeah. I mean, we don't have to spend a lot of time on this story. No, no, no. I do find it to be pretty funny. She's 19 years old, by the way. Her name is Kate Fahey. She's Irish. Oh.

Oh. Kate Fahey? You're telling me Kate Fahey is Irish? She's Irish. What? Yeah. Do you think she gets off work and goes down to the donkey for a Guinness? She does say. I thing about the job is the crack and the banter they have on site they do crack

that's not safe you know how they use that they don't have osha and love island c was smoking crack c-r-a-i-c which means like just bullshit i bet the i bet the other fellers on the job side just like to take the piss at her you know what i mean just mix it up yeah she's probably got good chat yeah good banter i mean but there's a time and place for grafting and on the job site is not one of them i think i found her on the grom i think i found her she's private probably for the best yeah weird dylan's already following her i couldn't be a crane operator because of the height situation. What's your, if you were in construction, like what do you think your position would be? Plus, if you mess up, it's a catastrophe.

Yeah. What happens to the people that fail in crane operating school that Dave was talking about? You don't get a job as a crane operator. Like there's got to be some consequences from failing. You got to have a counterweight because if this if this big arm picks up a lot of weight if you don't have a counterweight it'll tip the whole thing over you got to wait on the back end of it too you see what i'm saying it's called a counterweight if you look at a crane you'll see what i'm talking about it's why do you put the weight on the counter that's crane 101 stuff you wouldn't know about that it's crane 101 give me a second i

have an update on something we talked about recently. We did the elevator story the other day, right? An elevator salesman reached out to me and I'll paraphrase probably fairly inaccurately on what happened. Tell him this is a one-story building and we don't need an elevator here. He said, coming from an elevator sales rep, thought you guys would like to know that you're more likely to shoot through the overhead than fall to the ground. There are brakes that keep the cables in place. And if they break, the counterweight would fly down, yanking the car up. So like Willy Wonka and Charlie and his grandpa shooting out of there to go get in bed together or whatever the fuck happened.

Somehow more terrifying. Yeah, but have you ever heard of that happening to somebody? No. Come with me. Probably because they suppress it, like ski areas and lifts. A lot more lifts fall off the chairlift than you'd think. Man, you see that one video of the lift

that was going way too fast dude that was nectar no it wasn't people died wow way to go will i was just paraphrasing what dylan told me before the episode why'd you bring it up then because it's fucking sad and the video is like it's like live leak shit you gotta stop looking at lively i did i just saw it somewhere else you're always on lively i'm not i haven't been on there in years he's leaking yeah dylan the other day sat back from his laptop. He did that. Steven Seagal.

Who is it that goes back from the laptop? Antonio Banderas. Antonio Banderas. And Dylan just goes, oh, it's leaking today. That did not happen, folks. It absolutely happened. It's a made up thing. He's like, it's leaking.

It's leaking. Have you DM'd her? No, but imagine if you're like i don't know man like a crane operator you have no idea what they look like where did this story begin did she call the new york post and she's like hey like right who decides to do a story for me on this crane you gotta you gotta cover this shit yeah like what like where did this come from you're like wait you you operate a crane like does the author of this story have a crush on crane girl and he's like i'd like to i'm gonna

make you a star yeah maybe so she's only 19 i'm gonna make you a star don't you know what can make you a star squarespace oh squarespace if you're not familiar with it is an incredible incredible platform squarespace is the all-in-one platform for building your brand and growing your business online. You can stand out with beautiful websites. You can engage with their audience. You can sell anything, your products, your content that you create, and even your time. They have so many different things that you can do using Squarespace. Y'all know I ride for Squarespace very, very hard. Yes, you do. I started using Squarespace about 10 years ago. So you know I've got that resume on me. And guess what?

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other thing that you can use for that. Just go do it. I love them. I mean, if you're trying to get your business off the ground, if you're trying to get your creative itch out, whatever you're trying to do, go make it happen. Head to squarespace.com slash steam for a free trial. When you're ready to launch, use offer code steam steam to save 10 off your first purchase of a website or domain again that is offer code steam for 10 off your first purchase of a website or domain they used to call me the willy mammoth wait why kind of will we mammoth here comes will we mammoth it was because like wait why though really londos yeah it's because i i went through puberty first and i had hairy

legs and they all made fun of me and so i had to transfer schools i was always self-conscious of hairy legs i was the first one with hairy legs in my like core group. It's not surprising. Did you have the blonde hair first? Probably not. I had blonde hair when I was like five. Yeah. My bowl cut was pretty blonde. Yeah. Same.

How was your bowl cut? I didn't do a bowl cut. I had a flat top. Okay. Yeah. Okay. I was sick with it too. Now you just spend every weekend at round top i don't know that ref that's so stupid what's round top you're just antiquing it's a

trinket it's like a it's somewhere where like your aunt's gonna go there that's your joke your aunt's gonna go there in a girl's you love trinkets my guy it's like it's i mean drink yeah it's antique but not in like the the fun way when your buddy's like passed out and you throw flour dude all my round top pads are down with that joke yeah there's a there's a few young ladies in texas that's good man yo what happens with these meatballs dude are they spicy? I'm eating a mammoth ball. Meatball, that is. Val, an Australian cultivated food company that creates meat in a lab setting from animal cells,

says that it has used advanced molecular engineering to resurrect the woolly mammoth in meatball form. Hey, were they aiming to get like an actual woolly mammoth and it came out as a meatball weren't they supposed to bring these fuckers back for like the frost they've been talking about doing that for like five years yeah and they fucked up and now it's just a meatball yeah it turned into a they put it in the lab and the meatball came out they're like oh fuck we fucked this up i might as well eat this thing though jesus christ it's a meatball they're like, oh, fuck. We fucked this up. I might as well eat this thing, though. Jesus Christ, it's a meatball. They're like, hey, Dr. Schmidt, did they run that story in the New York Times about us bringing woolly mammoths back? Yeah.

No, we covered a hot crane operator, though. Cool. We can make a sub out of it at Subway. Ooh, dude, sneaky shouts to the meatball sub at Subway. Still never had one. It used to be my go-to. One of the better subs you can get there. Still never had one.

I need to go try it. Coming from a guy who's left off the schedule. I'd go 12-inch meatball sub and a sugar cookie. That's a lot of cows. I was like 17. I didn't care about cows at the time. I was just trying to snack. Harry Styles bringing the business.

Dude, that was gas. I mean, I would eat a hairy woolly mammoth ball. I'm sorry? It doesn't have to be a hairy ball. The ball hopefully doesn't have that. It's not a testicle, for the record. It's just a meatball.

It's just a meatball made out of woolly mammoth. Right. I would try it. I would too. I would try it. I would do it. If it's not going to make me sick, I'm trying it.

They combined original mammoth DNA with fragments of African elephant DNA. If it's not going to make me sick, I'm trying it. They combined original mammoth DNA with fragments of African elephant DNA. So it's part elephant. That makes me not want to eat it as much. I don't know why, but I have like, I've got love for elephants. Maybe no elephants were harmed in the making of this meatball. Thank you. I was about to say no elephants died to give you this meat.

Well, the elephant, the DNA that I probably got is probably from a dead elephant. Could be like from his saliva. Maybe not. Or maybe something else. Like the band? Click, click, meatball. Mm, mm, mm. No.

That's what happens when you bite into it? Wait, I want to follow up on whether or not cloning, or not cloning, but creating full- ass mammoths. Like we were promised. Look it up. Pull that up, Jamie. They got to eat the permafrost.

So the- That's what I'm saying, dog. The carbon doesn't emit or whatever the fuck. That's what I'm saying, fool. Isn't that a thing? Speaking to the Guardian newspaper, Professor Ernst Wulftang from the Australian Institute of Bioengineering.

It probably doesn't sound like this. What? You don't think Ernst Wulftang? Ernst. He said, we haven't seen this type of protein for thousands of years. So we have no idea how our immune system will react when we eat it. But if we did it again, we would certainly do it in their way to make it more palatable and regulatory bodies did y'all ever do the thing in college speaking of trying random meatballs did you ever do the thing in college where you could sign up for um like a clinical study and they would test stuff on you like you got denied

one weekend a month and they'd pay like a thousand bucks yeah i got denied i tried to do it everyone did everyone in our corridor did it's it's kind of fucked up it seems very predatory they're just yeah it's broke college kids and they're like hey let me test this shit on well yeah in my head i was like wait so i can either go to work four days a week for three hours a day and make four hundred dollars a week or i can go get a random shot of something for like $1,200. I'm going to go do that. You're going to pay me to get the jab? Yeah. You got jabbed with meatball?

Yeah, get the jab, Shay. We just injected you with 12 cc's of meatball. You're a woolly mammoth now. From an article in 2021 from The Guardian says a bioscience and genetics company called Colossal raised $15 million to bring back woolly mammoths.

That's not that much. Right? I think you're going to need more. How much did they raise? 15 mil. That's a drop in the bucket, dog. Still nuts. But this was from 2021 and there's no update.

So maybe they're still working on it. They're trying to secure more funding because like 15 million will get you like one laser. It'll get you still working on it. They're trying to secure more funding because like 15 million will get you like one laser. It'll get you one little mammoth. Maybe one mammoth. Like one little baby, like a baby meatball.

Yeah, but don't you need two mammoths so they can smash? We have a whole another mammoth population. That's the idea. God, can you imagine what that sounds like? If you just give them the business. What do mammoths make noise like probably similar to

elephants i couldn't do it i tried it's not bad it was it was getting there but it wasn't there there's no video i just did the trunk i kind of want to i've never seen an elephant like really up close like i want to touch one's nose they're cool, man. Do you guys think you'll go to Africa at any point? Nope. Ever? I'm a little scared of Africa.

Why? You get to take a bunch... Get a bunch of shots and stuff before you go. And it's like, I don't want... You want to get the jab? Wow, dude. I want to get all those jabs. You're doing your own research?

Plus, like, an African safari... African safari would be dope. But it's not... It's not in my top, like... Didn't you say you wanted to, like, an African safari would be dope, but it's not on my top, like, 10 list of things. Didn't you say you wanted to, like, go big game hunt? Like, you were, like, trying to go kill, like, a mountain lion. Yeah. Oh, no, no, no. Yeah, you said you were going hunting.

It's just not on my, it's not my top 10 list of things. I think I'll do it when, like, if we have, like, a whole family situation going on, two or three kids and shit. Like, I think I'll do it when they're like 18 so they can actually appreciate going to africa you know what i mean yeah it's like but i don't think i'm gonna do it before then if i'm old and and like i've run out of places to go i'm like let's fucking do it let's fucking ride are there woolly mammoths in africa no probably not or not where did they live when they were on the earth ohio mosey pangea super continent pangea that just means like the land is just it covered everything

sounds like i'm right egypt egypt famously on the continent of africa would you like to go see the pyramids uh the remains of woolly mammoths have been found in northern parts of asia america and europe wow obviously they lived in the middle of the pleistocene until the end of that period i want to i want to see the uh do your tongue like that yeah that's gross trump does i want to see a movie where it's like the story of the guy, the Australian kid, and like how he got inspired to, it was his love of Italian food and elephants. Then he's just like, holy shit,

I got to make a meatball out of this thing. But we need something else. How about something that's been dead for many, many, many years? Yeah, we've tried meats from other animals. Now we need something that's been extinct for a long time. what if it's not even the chef that's trying to do that what if it's a little mouse on top of the chef's head pulling on his hair making the meatballs but he's fratty this is frat this is really going somewhere fratatouille it's really going so he

just fucking he cannot stop hazing place yeah fratatouille. He's really going somewhere. He just fucking, he cannot stop hazing places. Yeah. Fratatouille? Yeah. He just makes drunk meals in the kitchen of the frat house. A rat that just hazes balls? Yeah. He just eats ramen and hazes balls.

That's all he fucking does. He dips. Oh, you added a cheese. Oh, no cheese for you. Were you left off the schedule? You don't have a job anymore? Again, he's from the Northeast. Oh, man.

I don't know what we're doing anymore. To answer your question, I do want to go to Africa. I want to do a safari. I want to do a safari at some point. I'm not talking the browser. That's not good. Don't be so proud of yourself. It was fine.

Oh, it's good. Ooh, you know what time it is. It's time for This Weekend in Fun, presented by Nothing Today, which means we can hop right in. How about Rollback? Well, it's on the rundown, so I figured we'd... But yeah, I mean, honestly, like, shouts to rollback. Back in 20. Here you go, Dylan.

They got some dope Master Steam swag right now. There's a very high chance. I'm playing golf on Saturday. I mean, actually, I'll save that. I'm doing something on Saturday where I'll probably wear a little rollback. Ooh, is it golf? Yeah. Dylan, what are you doing this weekend? Oh, thanks for asking, man.

So, it is uh Lil Bae's birthday weekend she turns six on Sunday I believe I better get that right yeah you might want to research that yeah it's Sunday yeah

pull that out Jamie so Friday we're doing uh we're going to dinner the four of us a little squad dinner where to don't dox him. I'm just curious.

Are you playing any cards that night? I'll give you a hint. A card will be punched. I didn't even have to ask. Holy shit, pop is in the house. A card will be punched that night. The day of reckoning is here. Saturday is her birthday party.

Yeah. Not going to say where it is, all right? Yeah, I wasn't going to ask. It's at a park. You did it. It's at a park. It's going to be a fun little scene, man. The homie will be there with us.

Hey, I'm not trying to tell you your business, but if she's planning on serving pizza the day after you guys go out for pizza, you know what that means, right? Two completely separate transactions. I don't want to see you get your card revoked. No, I'm not. I've already revoked one this week. I'm not going to eat little kid pizza at a little kid birthday party. Okay. I won't want to see you get your card revoked. No, I'm not. I've already revoked one this week. I'm not going to eat little kid pizza at a little kid birthday party.

Okay. I won't do it. Okay. You know what I mean? Yeah, I guess. You don't like follow me? How would someone not know what you meant by that? Little kid pizza. Here's the thing, though. After this birthday party on Saturday, I'll be looking for action. I'll be wanting to

step out. Really? I want to be drinking margaritas, beers, wine, martinis, all of it. You put it in front of me. Wait, what time is this birthday party? It's going down the hatch. What time is this birthday party? 11.30. Oh, okay. You're officially no longer first alternate for the tea time.

It simply doesn't add up. Yeah. It wasn't going to happen anyway, was it? Not currently. Not currently. I want't going to happen anyway, was it? Not currently. Not currently. I want to mob with the boys, man. If you want to step out, though, please holler at your boy if you see him in the streets because I'll be out there.

You're just going to be in the streets? Yeah. Just holler at me. Sunday, again, I'll be looking for action. Can I just text you instead of hollering at you in the streets? I will prefer a text message. But my phone, it'll be charged up and i'll be in a uh zone where i have good reception and all that stuff good sick strong

sick i'll be ready for your ping so ping ping a player that's what i'm saying i play titleist ping a player dave don't ping me because i won't be in town oh you got t swizz oh fuck sorry just tell them what i'm doing this weekend yeah dude hey why don't you take this i was so excited to tell everyone it's going to agtown yeah i okay yeah she is performing in arlington known to some as agtown are you calling it slag town some people call it. Not me. Yeah, we're going up Friday. And we're kicking off the weekend with potentially the earliest dinner res of all time at Carbone. I knew you were going to say this. When you said early, I was like, dude, they got a Carbone resi.

Yeah. We're doing Carbone. What time's the res? Five. Early bird. Yeah. Yeah. We're doing Carbone. What time's the rest? Five. Yes. Early bird. Yes. Yeah.

No, but they got- Have you been to Carbone? No. No. This is- Did I tell the story about how we thought we had a reservation there? And- Get your Carbone footprint joke out of the way so we can move on.

The day of, we found out we didn't we we didn't have one like it got lost dave you're gonna get a lot of people uh emailing you or texting you or dming you about what to get what's the piccata sitch i'm not sure what the piccata sitch is if i'm being completely honest with you um what people are going to tell you to get the most is the spicy rigatoni. Rigatoni. The spicy. Giuseppe, give me some rigatoni. The Caesar a la ZZ was also pretty heat when I was there.

Play a ZZ card. Okay. That's a Zussi. I'm looking forward to it. i've heard nothing but good things it's been very very much hype so that always worries me but whatever it's gonna be good i'm excited i love a good five o'clock dinner be hungry again at eight is this before the concert no no no no no the concert isn't till sunday make sure you carve blood before the concert you're gonna do a lot of standing i I know. I'm worried about that.

We're doing an early Easter Saturday, and we got the concert on Sunday at AT&T Center, and I'm currently trying to figure out the parking sitch because it looks like it's going to be not great. There's also a Ranger game that same night about 300 yards away. Across the street. Very cool. Very cool. Well, they stink. so well that season hasn't even started it's there's usually optimism before the season they might stink okay people are still gonna go it's opening weekend yeah fair enough if they're bad they can at least call up some talent from the minors profar might get a look good profile

not with the system anymore not with us he's he's moving on. He shot store friend Brent Rooker for making the opening day Rosti. Rook dog. He said maybe it's the too much dip bump. I thought you guys were doing it remotely. Dylan got a hold of him somehow? Come on back Monday. So he'll be out Monday. I mean, it's too much dip on Tuesday.

Oh, no. And you guys are going to have to maybe go pull the pull pin or whatever it is. Get Brett. That's what I'm saying. We'll be fine. We'll get by. We'll be fine. I think we'll be just fine.

Yeah, we're not worried. I don't know how you guys are going to do Love Island. Although I might be – I think I can actually do Love Island pod. I would feel bad missing the last one because so much happened this week you know there's just so much to fucking chat about yeah this week this week eight minute this week's love island pod might be one of the shorter love island pods that you guys see you understand you understand you didn't you didn't understand i read that that they chanted Martin's name during the reunion. Martin.

Uh-huh. I watched the reunion. Probably the episode I'm most excited about because last week of Love Island is tough. It's a tough watch. It kind of stinks. All right. What is the fit of choice for males at a Taylor Swift show? I would tell you, Dave, but I didn't see any other males there.

It's difficult. It's 90% women, 9% gay men, and 1% straight males. Okay. Great smelling crowd.

Target rich environment. Great smelling crowd. I fucks with that heavy. Yeah. Yeah. Good smelling crowd. rich environment great smelling crowds with that heavy yeah yeah good smelling crowd yeah although just smelling a lot of dudes there were much more comfortable showing skin than i was what's the squeal factor at a taylor swift concert i said this to somebody the other day i have never in my life had my ears ring like i did when she first took the stage it was it was jarring like I don't think that you need ear plugs for the entire concert. That's simply not

the type of show that it is. I would not blame somebody for plugging their ears when she first hits the stage. You can't see my face. Nobody looks cool plugging their ears. No one has ever looked cool. Dude, it was, it,

it was difficult after your ears were ringing. God, I hope she comes out and plays me, me in the middle. Do you have any songs that you hope she plays as her secret songs for your, your, your show? Um,

I pretty much want everything off of 1989 that's the answer so i i don't really know if like it's like personal fave style love style well she already plays that one so i was gonna say that's probably already in the in the road my worry about 1989 is that it doesn't lend itself to the acoustic portion of the secret song section i'll be sitting down for that yeah oh yeah they're not i don't really care for you okay 44 songs brother yeah i know and i told you how bad your take was about being mad about a three-hour concert and i'm about to probably go be mad about a three-hour concert there's nothing to be mad about but don't feel like don't feel like you need to stand up during times when it feels like you should be sitting down you can also just dip out and beat traffic yeah i don't really want to make my wife like leave the concert that she really wants to be at early that's a dad move though it is a dad

move sally will tap me at every concert i go to and be like can we can we beat traffic and uh i jokingly did it to her at taylor swift and joke fell flat fell a little flat not my not my best work i'm hoping she brings somebody out on stage. I don't really know who. She's only done it once so far. Leon Bridges. Which either means that there's a better chance that it'll happen for you, or there's just a worse chance because she's only doing it once this tour.

She's got to do it, right? Arlington? Cowboys Stadium? She could get the stanky leg guys, GS boys. Maybe it's Micah Parsons. Maybe she'll bring the stanky leg guys out and hit the stanky leg in front of everybody. Something to think about. I'm just putting stuff out there, man.

Maybe she'll bring out Hillary Swank and do the swanky leg. What's she up to? I think it's time to call it after that. Maybe she'll bring out Frank Caliendo and they can do the franky leg. Okay, we got to call it. Frank Caliendo's pretty talented. Admit it. Maybe they can bring out Frank Caliendo and they can do the Frankie leg. Okay, we got to call it. Frank Caliendo is pretty talented.

Admit it. Maybe they can bring out Californication's Hank Moody and they can do the Hanky leg. Or Hank from Breaking Bad. Yeah. No. It's good. Hank, no. From the car.

It's good. It's a popular image from the show. It's been memed. I'm going to get memed at this thing, aren't I? I'm going to be sitting down with my arms crossed. Checking your watch? I'm going to end up on TikTok. Look at this choogy ass

with the backwards cap on and the mustache. Which Big Time Tommy t-shirt am I rocking? That's the question. I've got two to choose from. Please do. I wore all black. Really? Well, my shirt's black. I just wore a sweater and some slacks.

Nothing crazy. Figured I'd blend in. You didn't murder it out. I was in Vegas, baby. Okay. Big weekend for your boy. Not much going on. Can't wait.

Ever heard that before? Friday night. Might go on a date with my wife. We have a reservation. Not sure we'd use it. It was one of those residencies that we made a long time ago. We're just squatting. We're cyber squatting on the reservation.

What's the location? It's on South Congress. So-co. I just don't know if I feel like going on a date on Friday night to this restaurant. I kind of want to go somewhere where I can indulge a little bit more. Dude, you're going on a date. Maybe a place that has loaded baked potatoes. Maybe a little place called Bartlett's.

I might get a loaded baked potato on Friday. Get that Spiniardi. But I got to be careful because, as you guys know, I have a foursome with the boys on Saturday. Having a foursome. That's some alpha shit. Alpha males only. Going out to Lions Municipal Golf Course.

Austin National, to get my golf itch going. Think about going low. Think about going low. You've decided to go low. Visualize it. Think about going low. Yeah, I got some Pro V1s

arriving at the office today. So if you guys could not use those before I get my hands on them, that'd be cool. We'll see. Too much spin for me. Yeah, I need that spin. My swing speed's just declining rapidly.

Yeah, yeah, i need it um so yeah i'm excited about that and i think i'm gonna try to parlay that into some tex-mex i love that move i'm gonna be sweaty on the course so i'm gonna get off and i'm just bringing bring my stank into matt's albrancho you know what is is a tex-mex place the best place to go after a round of golf because it just smells like fajitas in there anyway yeah so even if you smell like grass and sweat like you're just gonna leave just smells like fajitas in there anyway. Yeah. So even if you smell like grass and sweat, you're just going to leave there smelling like fajitas. I had a nice sweater on one day

and we almost went to Matt's and I was like, I need to take this sweater off before we get in there because I don't feel like washing it right away. And it's going to smell like fajitas and finishing sauces, Brett calls it. Yeah.

For me- That's what they call it. Truly. They call it poncho style, actually. Yeah. Like when you think about it, you really, really look back and be like, okay, you'd have like the smell from the golf course

and the smell from the restaurant. And for me, it's the juxtaposition between the two. Thanks, guys, for a great week of content i can't we'll see you tomorrow bye Outro Music