Circling Back - Human Decanting at Vince Young Steakhouse

Episode Date: May 27, 2020

The rumors are true — We're back in The Lodge. An explanation of what human decanting is, a scorched earth tweet from Vince Young Steakhouse, the viral "Dear Men, What’s Stopping You From Looking Like This?" tweet, and This Weekend in Fun. Support us on Patreon and receive weekly episodes for as low $5 per month: www.patreon.com/circlingbackpodcast (0:00) Fun & Easy Banter (11:09) Human Decanting (26:48) Dear Men, What’s Stopping You From Looking Like This? (41:59) Vince Young Steakhouse Tweet (53:45) This Weekend in Fun Vizzy: Buy Vizzy and tag them/us in everything you post. Sunbasket: www.sunbasket.com/randy (PROMO CODE RANDY for $35 off) --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/circling-back/message Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

all right we're back circling back podcast coming to you live from the lodge my name is will to freeze to my right david ruff feels good to be back in the lodge will it doesn't feel good it feels great uh yeah i was wondering how the chemistry would be and it seems to be good so far i mean dylan's over here uh trying to get call of duty tips from randy um i'm looking up catheters on amazon right now looking up human decanting more on that later uh just things are going well we got a full house here picked up taco deli we're about i would say what five and a half six feet apart just you know we're not we're not kissing yet so we're taking the precautions yeah we haven't kissed yet

unfortunately that's that's one of the things that we put on our short list of things that we absolutely cannot do for a little bit yeah that and uh and human decanting but i first of all i can't express how excited i am to be back in the Lodge. You can't express it, actually. You're right, I can't. You're on a podcast. I can't express to the extent that it deserves. Do you know what it feels like to me right now? What?

It kind of feels like the first day of school, and we're in a class with all our boys. It's just like, oh, the squad's back. We're going to run this year. It's going to be great. It's honestly really strange seeing you guys in person. It's weird. It is, because I've been looking at a little four by four tile of your face for months now and now to see you in person it's like oh yeah

that's what will looks like in real life can i ask a favor while we record today absolutely not can you guys just delay by like a half second when you say things and then make your voices crackle a little bit and talk over each other the people at home i hope they understand how difficult it is to do this. Oh, here we go. It's like our job's really hard. We're the true heroes. The delay that we've had to deal with for the past two and a half months,

the half-second delay, has really thrown me off my game because I will start talking, and to no one's fault, they will start talking at the same time I do. So I'm like, oh, I better just give them some runway so they can get whatever they say out. But it's been so tough. It was annoying for everybody, but you definitely took it the hardest.

I did, I did. Yeah, I mean, if we talk, so the way the stream worked, it would pick one person to, their audio would come through over the other person. Somebody would get trumped, basically. Every time. Yeah, every single time. And it just made it really tough. Believe me, somebody would get trumped, basically. Every time? Yeah, every single time.

And it just made it really tough. Believe me, you're getting trumped. Okay. It really threw me off my game. So, you know, I'm happy to be back for numerous reasons. But I think the content will be much better now. So that's the main reason. Hey, you know how I teased that match between my two buddies back home?

Yeah. They played yesterday. And one who will be listening to this, he's the one I almost put money on but ended up not doing any of that. It was 124 to a 110, and he lost. 124? Dude, imagine firing a 110 and you win by 14 strokes. And he was giving up.

Yeah, so Tim's was getting four strokes, and it just didn't even matter. Did you have money on it? No, I tried to bet, and nobody responded to my text, and it ended up being the best thing. He took a 14 on a hole. And my question was like, dude, you've got to put a stroke limit. Make it nine. That's what they do in high school tournaments.

Yeah, play high school tournament rules. Just throw it back to high school. Yeah. Was it Kevin Na who, with the 14 in San Antonio? Probably. I know Daly's had some big boy numbers. Hit one in the woods, and it took him nine strokes to get it out or something crazy. Well, I hate Kevin Na ever since, I think it was at, I don't remember.

With the rough? When we were there? When he was dropping his ball on the rough. Oh. That's the little video? Yeah. It was before one of the U.S. Opens. Like Wingsfoot or something like that.

This is crazy. And he was dropping, yeah. He was chucking his ball into the densest rough, and he was like, I don't know. And then he was taking fake hacks at it. And it was like, dude, you're such a loser. Hey, guess what, Kevin? They're all playing the same course, buddy. It's not just you that's got to deal with this rough.

Chill out. Don't put it over there, Kevin. The man did beat the Yips, though. So you got to give him credit for that. Don't care. I mean, I kind of do. That's kind of tight. I always felt really bad for, was it Jared Saltalamakia?

Was he the one who had the Yips and he couldn't throw it back to the home plate? Ooh, Jeremy Ranger. Yeah. That was tough. I'm always intrigued by the Yips. It's't throw it back to the home plate? Oh, Jeremy Ranger, great. Yeah. That was tough. I'm always intrigued by the yips. It's crazy. I could see myself getting them at some point. Dylan, you had the podcast yips.

Yeah, I've had podcast yips for the past two and a half months, David. Do you ever get it while playing video games? Sometimes if I overthink it while playing video games, if I think about what buttons I'm pressing and I don't just do it, I'll all of a sudden forget how to do things. That's the worst. I've never had that happen. It's not great.

Oh, gosh. I've got to say, I'm still getting used to this. It's weird. Yeah, it is weird. It's strange, man. I keep thinking there's going to be delays and stuff. It's very bizarre. It's nice to be able to speak without having to worry about someone immediately over-talking you.

We should all just drink NyQuil before we do it. True. Just delay ourselves. So we're delayed. I mean, if anyone has any questions about our safety, I don't want to tell them to come to our place of work and look at the entrance. But it's the most advanced security system in our office. Holy shit. But it's the most advanced security system in our office. There's an actual human body heat detector in front of our building that scans you when you come in. I was like, what's that big orange blob?

And I was like, oh, that's me walking through the door. There are these footprints that are taped to the floor. And you're supposed to, I guess, stand there and let this thing just register your body temperature. It also records you. It's doing a lot. I need more intel on what they're doing with these recordings. It's really aggressive. It feels like I'm entering a CIA building or something.

They should have emailed all the tenants and been like, hey, here's what we're doing. But to my knowledge, they have not done that. And what if I come straight from the gym? What if I just got like a ferocious pump in and I just walk in there and I just set that thing off? What if he jogged here from South Austin? Yeah.

Dude, I run hot. Me walking from my car to the entrance is enough for me to start sweating through my shirt. I kind of want that year round even when COVID's been defeated because I do want to know like when I am walking in and it's like, you know, it's 830 in the morning and it's already 96 degrees, I would like to see what my body temp is just for fun. Yeah. Yeah. We could do a temp off, see who's the hottest. I like the sound of that.

Yeah. I have to be the hottest. Whoever's the hottest has to decant. Dude, stop. Stop. Stop. Don't blow our loads too early about this decanting stuff. A lot of options on Amazon over here, by the way.

We'll get some for a few different sizes. See how they feel. That's good. Get a small one for me, please. I guess people will eventually know what we're talking about. Yeah, they'll get there eventually. Yeah. We've got some major news.

Kind of dead news. This is like news that we've been teasing for a really long time and just have never done anything about it. Dylan, can you hit us real quick? Gladly. New sponsor. New sponsor alert. We have a new sponsor.

This might not feel like a new sponsor because we've just been drinking them all the time, but we're talking about Vizzy, baby. Vizzy, Vizzy, Vizzy. Can't you see? Okay. Wow. Is that your thug plug for the week? I mean, just coming out hot with the Vizzy ads.

Y'all like that one. Don't look at me for anything, Will. I can tell y'all like that one. Biggie. Yeah, no, we're familiar with the song. Oh, so the song wasn't originally Vizzy. Okay, I didn't think Vizzy had been around for that long. Dude, this is the hottest new spiked seltzer in the game right now.

There's so many options out there. You go to the store, you got these hard seltzers just all over the place. How about something that, you know, having a little something extra makes your choice a little easier. And Vizzy stands out by having something all the other hard seltzers don't. Antioxidant, vitamin C. Boom. I love me some vitamin C. These are legitimately delicious.

You know what's funny and true? That before Vizzy came on board, Dylan was actually only drinking soft seltzers. Yeah. You're right. Soft seltzers only. Yeah. I'm sorry. I didn't know how hard these hard seltzers went.

That Cinnasaur's doing a lot happened there. Sorry. It's good, man. The pomegranate might be my favorite. Dude, that's the thing. These things have like two different traits that just combine into one, and it's just a bomb. Yeah. Like, they've got, let me see.

All the flavors are wild. Pineapple, mango, black cherry lime. Strawberry kiwi. Strawberry kiwi. Strawberry kiwi. Slaps. And then my personal favorite, blueberry pomegranate. I call it BP. I call it Bloob's Pommy.

Bloob's Palms. Please don't. Yeah, dude. Come on. I mean, dude, these things have everything. They have things that I don't even know what they are. Like, it's the only hard seltzer crafted with antioxidant and vitamin C, and it's extracted from acerola?

Do you even know what that is? I put that in everything. Dude, it's a cherry. I used to call Dylan. Yeah. It's cherry. It's a super fruit with 30 times more vitamin C per cup than an orange. I always thought oranges were like the goats of vitamin C.

Yeah. That's what I was told growing up. Yeah. Instead of drinking orange juice with my breakfast now, I just drink a Vizzy. You have to. You have to. Okay. Dude, hell yeah. a Vizzy. You have to. You have to. Okay. Dude, hell yeah.

I mean, it's just refreshing. It's 5% ABV. I'd say that's right in the wheelhouse for just hanging out at a pool or on a pontoon boat. That's what you want. Yep. 100 calories, less than one gram of real cane sugar per can. So every sip of Vizzy is more exhilarating. I love this stuff.

I love it. It's fantastic. There's other ones out there, and in the past I've liked them, but then I had this one, and I was like, oh, this is what it should feel like. It's the seltzer of the summer. Let me just say that right now. We need people to help us out here. If you are drinking Vizzys this weekend,

make sure to go tag Vizzy in your post if you're putting it on social media. Tag us in it. We'll repost it. We wouldn't hate it if you tagged us and gave us a little bit of credit. You'll get an automatic repost. I'm not worried about that. So tag us, tag Vizzy, tag everything.

Put it on your Instagram story. Put it on Twitter. Whatever. Upgrade your hard seltzer with Vizzy. To find out where you can purchase Vizzy, go to VizzyHardSeltzer.com. That's VizzyHardSeltzer.com. And like Vizzy, go to VizzyHardSeltzer.com. That's VizzyHardSeltzer.com. And like I said, tag at Vizzy Hard Seltzer in your social post this weekend. And yes, for those wondering, you must be 21 or older. Hey, we should do a contest and the winner

gets a free at-home concert from the Brian Seltzer Orchestra. I feel like we've done that before. We have. Okay. we're running it back because it's it actually applies now we have a legit sponsor i know now we can actually do this this is so exciting we could maybe make that happen i would have been so bummed had like i'm glad that we got like a good hard seltzer sponsor instead of like some like bootleg one that we were like oh i don't actually like this pretend to like it yeah i mean we would we would have we would have though no other ones have blue palmy, though. Yeah, you don't see that anywhere else.

No. I mean, in the same vein, I guess, as drinking, is it time that we talk about human decanting? Please don't. This is the one flavor that Vizzy doesn't have. Please don't human decant your Vizzys, though. That would hurt so freaking bad. Please do not do it. Human decanting was something that we learned about, I would say, just yesterday.

Do you guys want me to tell you the story of the human wine decanter? Please. Please do. So we heard this from somebody else that just heard through hearsay that this was a thing that people did. And I went online, typed in human decanting, and what I found was something that I did not love. This person says, I was scouring through the interwebs recently and I came across a story. First of all, gross. For all the wrong reasons, I would like to now share this story with you. How kind of me. Blah, blah, blah. But essentially it started because a guy goes to the ER at a local hospital.

He's complaining of irritation every time he urinates. Been there. He gets examined and the doctor thinks nothing too unusual of it sending the guy on his way to get a prescription of antibiotics a couple weeks go by and the gentleman has returned to the er several times now at which point the doctor knows that there's more to the situation than what's being let on he tells the guy that unless he knows exactly what is going on there's not much more he can do so the guy tells his story he tells the doctor that he was hired by very wealthy individuals. I'm imagining like succession kind of stuff. I'm thinking eyes wide shut parties. Yes. Like that. Everybody's wearing a mask and not like

a COVID mask. Yeah. And so this was a form of quote luxury entertainment. Okay. Did he make these services available for hire or did they just like hire him? Like, okay, this is what we want you to do situation? It's hard to say. He probably went on Nextdoor and offered up his services. So this is a form of luxury entertainment, and I hate saying this. This makes me sound like a scumbag. There's nothing luxurious about this.

But them saying that it's luxurious makes me want to do it more. Yeah, just let him finish. Let's make the judgment after. So he's paid a ridiculously large sum of money to insert a catheter into his bladder. Does everyone know what a catheter is? Yeah, it's one of the few things that makes me cringe when I think about it. It's a little rubber tube that sticks up your pee-pee hole. So this drains the urine, and then you refill it with copious amounts of wine.

So they sucked out the pee and replaced it with wine. Yep. And then taking a variety of drugs to ease the pain, the gentleman then makes his way around the venue, So they sucked out the pee and replaced it with wine. Yep. And then taking a variety of drugs to ease the pain, the gentleman then makes his way around the venue, decanting wine from his penis into the guest's glasses. Wait, so he's doing this in front of him? So it's like table-side wine service? Sir, would you like some more?

So does he put a white cloth over his arm and then put his thing on top of it? He just does the wristwatch trick. Does he just pop bottoms and go from table to table offering up pours? How does it work? Or do they come to him? They should just have him as a statue. It's like a little fountain. It's like when you go and there's a martini bar

so they have like an actual decanter out there and unfortunately it's called willie's wine decanter and it's shaped like a penis and so this is for poor people who can't afford to have these parties where they have an actual human being going around to be clear this is this involves an actual live human being so this is like what they did did. This is what Epstein was doing. Epstein 100% is human decanted. So go look at the flight logs, and all those people you see in the flight logs, they have definitely drank wine from a man's penis. Bill Gates is human decanted.

So there's like a sexual element to this, obviously, right? Because it doesn't do anything for the- Yeah, because the penis is a sexual organ. Because the wine is not doing- it's not actually decanting wine. You know what I mean? No, it's not. It's not getting oxygen in the wine. Well, what if he does like some acrobatics before?

Yeah, but okay. People are drinking coffee out of like cat poop. Why can't they just go in and like. Dude, I will drink some cat poo coffee. Someone could just send it to me. So why are you willing to do it with an animal putting stuff in its body, but you're not willing to drink a number of reasons? A human decanted Pinot. Because it comes straight from the Pin.

And like, I feel like it's like farm to table or Pin to table. Pin Grigio has legs. Oh, God. But this just seems, I don't know. There's so, this is, it's so wrong on so many levels here. I'm going to start buying Willie's penis decanters at, like, wholesale and just reselling them on washmedia.com. So did his pee hole get infected?

Like, what – do we know what happened? Probably because the wine. The wine and there's some probably yeast involved and just bacteria. I don't think you're supposed to be just shoving catheters in your bloodstream. Does it get in your bloodstream if you put it up in your bladder? Like, did he get drunk? Might have been absorbed through the bladder. Well, so do you guys, have you guys heard of coffee enemas?

Yes. Because there's this, have you guys, do you guys know who Emily Oberg is? I answered that way too quickly, by the way. I've never done a coffee enema. She's like an influencer. She has like a brand. She's recently, as Barrett said the other day in a tweet, she's on a year-long tour of trying to make everyone hate her right now.

Love it. Nice. Yeah, she's kind of insufferable. And she takes every single product design for like her line of clothing. She steals from like another brand. From Scaries? Yeah. No, she didn't steal any from Scaries.

That's the other girl. That's Allegra Shaw. Shouts to her. And then, so apparently you just do an enema with coffee. And because like, it's kind of like, I guess, butt chugging. The caffeine stimulates the prostate and it makes you. Yeah. And so while Sally's never dealt with anybody that did this,

she said that she's read about it because it's just weird. And she said that it's like addicting for people. People get addicted to do it because the high is so nice from the coffee. What I'm saying is that we need to get rid of our DeLonghi and just start doing coffee enemas with the squad. DeLonghi. Can we hire just a super hot dude to decant our wine as well?

Just to hang out here? That's why we hired Human Randy. Jesus. Human Randy. We didn't call him Human Randy because he wasn't going to be decanting. Dude, I know weirdly way too much about coffee enemas from Rogan. Oh really? Like dude,

there's every six months there'll be a guy coming on and he's just one of those dudes. I can't remember this guy's name. It's one in particular. And he's like super into all the cutting edge stuff. And he kind of talks like this and you're like, dude, you're insufferable, but you do some dope shit. And he's like a into all the cutting edge stuff. And he kind of talks like this. And you're like, dude, you're insufferable.

But you do some dope shit. And he's like a coffee enema every morning. He has like a squatty potty that he rolls over on. I'm like, dude, it just seems excessive. And I feel like that wouldn't be good for you. Sally told me that she read about a couple who had been doing it for like, they would do it like all day. And they had kids that they were like pretty much ignoring responsibilities with

because they were so addicted to doing coffee enemas that they were just doing it. What if the nurse from Enema of the State wanted to give you a coffee enema? I'm saying yes to that. Well, in her current state? No, no, no. Back in 1998. What was her name? Jenna?

I used to know. There was a time when I knew. Even I know who that girl is. Her name was Jenna or something. Lady, I should say. That was a hot cover. Yeah. know who that girl is her name was like jenna or something lady i should say that was a hot cover uh yeah it was what when i bought the cd i got another cd that was not uh parental advisory and i put it on top of the blink 182 one and so when i went up to get rung up i just set those two down hoping that my mom wouldn't see and then uh my sister i think i believe my sister took the

fall for me and said like no this no, this is for me, Mom. You know what shirt I wanted as a kid but never was able to purchase for obvious reasons? It was the parental advisory. Like, it was, like, it was mocking parental advisory logo, and it said explicit fucking lyrics. Oh, wow. Dude. That is so lame. Yeah, it sucks. Man, so a bladder can't, it can't carry a ton of liquid in it, right?

So you got to keep refilling that bad boy. You know what I mean? I would be the worst human decanter. No one wants me decanting their wine. Yeah, Dave's out here pouring half glasses of wine. Yeah, and it's just inconsistent. Will, though. Will can fill up a whole table, no problem.

That's a different story. Yeah. Oh, your boy. You were made for this me give me a magnum give me a magnum bottle give me it all so there's actually i just googled i just looked up something else again there's actually like an actual like thing like a medical study on this and it says when my colleague obtained a detailed history from the patient the patient described decanting as the process by which at a party for men having sex with men, he would go to the back room, south catheterize his

urinary bladder, drain out all of the urine, fill his bladder with wine, usually red wine, remove the catheter, and then return to the party and fill guests empty wine glasses with his penis with the wine sequestered in his bladder. He noted that he always received very generous cash tips for such guest services. He would then refill his bladder and repeat the same technique throughout the evening. And so, yeah, pretty much exactly what we said. They do reference, see, this is what makes me worried about this actual medical study on here from Joseph P. Myers, MD. Is that he does reference the Urban Dictionary thing.

And it makes me wonder if he knows that the Urban Dictionary is just completely human sourced. Human sourced, much like this decanted wine. Much like the decanted wine, correct. I don't see us trying this, but my goal is to be invited to a party that has this option. Like when they send you the menu, it's like check for chicken or fish or whatever you want. Human decanted. Yeah, like I'm not going to check the box, but I would like to have the option.

You want to be there when it's going down. Yeah, like I want to watch from the other side of the room and just kind of like be like, man, I can't believe they're doing that. And then like secretly be like, man, it looks kind of good. So I didn't want to tell you guys this. At our wedding, we were solely human decanting.

Really? Yeah. That's what that back room was. Yeah, because we downsized everything and did it at the last minute, we had some extra funds left over. And we were like, well, do we have any humans that are willing to put wine in their penis? You found a couple guys. Yeah, and the hotel was like, actually, funny you ask. It just seems unnecessary.

Yeah. Yeah. ask it just seems unnecessary yeah yeah would you rather have human decanted wine in that manner or just have someone get uh take a sip of wine swish around in their mouth and just spit it right into your mouth oh i'll take that you take that over i would take saliva wine over bladder wine any day. Yeah, I think I agree. You know, wine that comes out of a penis, that's the thing here, Dave. It doesn't sound too appealing to me. Yeah, but in these uncertain times. What does it do to the tasting notes of the wine?

It's more full-bodied. Oh, Dave. You got to think it warms it up. Yeah. Yeah, which you don't want. Because, you know, your human body, I mean, you want to know the human body temperature, you can just walk into our fucking office. 98.6 or whatever.

That's actually a really good point. You don't want your wine to be warm. Even red wine, you want it a little bit cooler than room temp. You want it like 60-something. Can you imagine just like swizzling it around? No, I cannot. Just taking it in? Just nodes of apricot?

Why do people keep searching for just weird, gross ways to absorb their alcohol? We had the butt-chucking kid a long time ago. You've heard about the tampon thing, I'm sure. Well, we're going gonna need more on that so you like you basically just dip a or like soak a tampon yeah that's dangerous don't do that real danger put it up your fellas don't do that either put up your b-hole or your right right there's many holes your other one many options right just don't do that you know what i'm saying dave yeah Yeah, no, I mean, I'm going to just continue to enjoy exactly one beer or Vizzy through my mouth orifice. Yeah, mouthful. To be honest, I was a little annoyed the other night during Happy Hour Live, which has moved to Wednesdays now, by the way.

Shouts to Wednesday. Oh, tonight. Yeah, tonight. People are really calling it Wet Wednesday because I've seen that thrown around. Hard to say. It's not the worst name. Wednesday, because I've seen that thrown around. Hard to say.

It's not the worst name. But this dude last week gave us an F. Mary kill for drinking beer out of a glass, a bottle, or a can. And in the back of my head the entire time, I was like, so we're just not doing... We have a new contender in the mix here. Yeah, we're not doing human one? Since when is that not a thing? I do like that they at least have enough class and luxury to drink it out of glasses, and they're not just doing it in each other's mouths. Yeah, that would be a little excessive.

You know that's going down, though. I also think this portrays it as only men doing it with other men. I would like to imagine that. I don't go to men- on men's sex parties all that often right so like if i go to a luxurious underground if i'm at i don't know pete budich is whatever his his thing in napa where they're drinking like 300 bottles of wine i better be drinking it out of someone's member yeah i mean i don't know if i don't know if mayor p gets down like that uh just doing some member drinking but i'm Dude, let's just break down the primary candidates most likely to have attended a party like this.

Were there any famous people at his thing? I'm going to say Joe Biden. Maybe? I'm guessing if you just tip the guy extra, you cut out the middleman, which is the glass, and you just go straight to the source, straight to the tap, basically. What if he's like, all right, guys, only a little bit left, and they're getting him and shaking him and flipping him around, slapping the bag? What the hell?

You can't shake a whole person to get a couple of drops out. There's sediment in the bottom of the last glass. It's like, oh, what's that? A Kit Kat bar falls out of his butt. This is just vile on many levels. Yeah, I didn't expect. We have not been sitting on this story. It's not like we were like, let's save this one for when we're all together.

This is hot off the press, man. This is hot. No, it's just like sometimes things just fall into your lap at the right time. Or into your glass. The world knew that we couldn't talk human decanting from afar. We had to do it together. Yeah. How do you feel about this, Dylan?

Because you were known as the human decanter for a while. Oh, I don't recall that. Hey, I got more on the porn star from the Blink-182 album. Her name was Jenna, right? Janine. Janine. And you know who she was married to? Remember Jesse James?

The, uh, Sandra Bullock's ex? Yeah, the motorcycle guy. She was married to him. Was he West Coast Customs or whatever? Or is that a different thing? They're all the same.

They're all customizing motorcycles. Is she still married to him? Nah. Doesn't look like it. Nah. Didn't she have, like, a very, like, like,

Eastern European last name or something? Yeah, it's Linda Mulder. Yeah, I definitely Googled her and was let down because I think the hottest she ever looked to me was on the cover of that album. She doesn't look bad in this Wikipedia photo. I'm happy to report that the live album that we talked about not being on Spotify is on Spotify. I did a Peli ride to it the other day, and to be honest, it went pretty hard. They bring the energy.

Dave, you were listening to it at the pool with your parents. Yes. It doesn't feel like the move given the stuff in between all the songs. Tom or Adam, one of them, or Mark, excuse me, he just goes, I was thinking Adam's song. Yeah, I know. He's like, hey, this next song is about the time I had herpes. And you're just like, oh, okay.

And then it continues. The fun and easy banter is just like, it's the most R-rated banter you're going to hear. We just talked about human decanter. I mean, when I was listening to it, I actually did it two days in a row, listened to the same album on the ride. And all I would do is, the second the song started wrapping up, I just hit the next thing song on the Raycons. Yeah, that's smart.

Those E25s. Can we talk about the viral tweet that's kind of body shaming all these men, including us? Is this Vince Young? Oh, no, this is a different tweet. No, this is what's been, I guess, just called Dear Men, What's Stopping You From Looking Like This? Yeah. Do you have the original tweet up, Dylan? I don't, but i can i can just i

can explain exactly what happened it's it's what you just said it is a a tweet some young lady tweeted dear men what's stopping you from looking like this and it's a picture of a guy's just torso and he's absolutely shredded he's wearing underwear he's an underwear model like he is he's in he's in the peak of shape it's magazine it's a magazine quality photo he's probably about five percent body fat and as you can imagine she's just getting ratioed into oblivion yeah right now she's got 11 300 likes on the tweet but she's got uh 15 000 responses and so it's just not great it's it's a tough scene you know i don't mind her tweet it doesn't like, like, bother me.

But what bothers me is the fact that people are still doing, like, the Dear Men. Like, they're doing different versions of it, like, even, like, right now. And it's like, man, this is, like, you had, like, 24 hours to do this, and now you're just outside the lines. I'm not saying this, but I imagine a lot of the comments are in the vein of, oh, imagine if a guy was saying this about women type thing. Pointing out a little double standard situation here. Why don't you just tweet out a generic hot photo of a generic hot woman and just do that, Dylan?

People are doing that. Yeah, I've seen that. It's become a little trend. It's a meme, if you will. There's a bunch of absolutely shredded kings in the comments that are just taking this opportunity to post absolute thirst traps. Cole Campbell posted. Can you respond with your photos from this past weekend, Dylan? I don't know about that.

Do you see Cole Campbell rearrange his room? Yeah, it looks good. Did you see how close his bed is to his little media console thing? Yeah. You can't even walk between the bed and the console. like media console thing. Yeah. You can't even walk between the bed and the console. Well, my favorite thing about his old setup of his room

was that he did have his TV mounted, but then he noted that he didn't like his TV mounted, so he took it off the mount and put it on the table. Left the mounting on the wall. Yeah, kind of a swag move. It's kind of a bouquet of the ass to take it out, and you've got to cover up the drywall. If you're a person who likes a clean look of hiding wires,

there's not the room for you. You know, one thing I've learned from getting DMs and people sending pics of them playing Call of Duty or something to me, a lot of people don't mind wires. Yep. And it's kind of shocking. Yep. Because once you make that move into like,

okay, I'm an invisible wire guy, you can't go back. No, no. It's forever going to ruin wires for you. I feel like people look at it like a project to where you've got to take walls down and really rearrange the structure of your house in order to do it. Yeah, you've got a low, barren wall we're going to tear down, bud. Which is just simply not true. Can I just ask a question?

Yeah. How do you hide the wires when you wall mount to television? Okay, so the easiest way to do it is if you have your console directly below your TV. Okay? Okay. Because that way you just drill a hole behind your TV. There's a certain drill bit for it. It's an inch and a half or whatever, so you can fit a plug through it.

Dillon-sized. You drop it down, and you drill another hole, same size, down behind your console until you drop the wire down and pull it through, and you plug it into whatever you got down there. That's the easiest way to do it, which is how most people do it. How do you get it through the other hole? You've got to do some maneuvering. You've got to dangle it and kind of either stick your fingers through or maybe get a wire hanger

and create a little hook so you can hook it and pull it through. It's very simple. If you know what you're doing, it takes 15, 20 minutes to do. I'm always scared of what's in the walls. Interior walls. Okay, so exterior walls have, what do you call that stuff? The drywall? Insulation.

Oh, yeah, sorry. So they're harder to do. Big home maintenance guy over here. If it's an exterior wall, it can be a little bit more difficult. But an interior wall, you have no excuse not to do it. Okay. Because I've never done it myself. I've never mounted a TV myself.

I don't mind having a TV sitting on a console at eye level. That's how I like it. But that being said, we're thinking about getting a new TV for the bedroom. And I'm like, all right, we've got to wall mount this thing. I want this thing to be swag. I want one of the ones that looks like a picture frame, but from my research, they haven't gone down in price at all. It seems too luxurious.

Yeah, it's too much money. It's too much money. Anyway, Nigel Weyers people, come on. Grow up. How did we get here? I like the responses to this tweet, the people being like, oh, well, actually a number of things preventing me from looking like this. It's like, yeah, my diet.

Carbohydrates. Yeah. Time. Just time. I like to have a couple beers, you know, on occasion. Just one. Well, how dehydrated is this dude? Yeah.

Oh, very much so. He hasn't had water in six days. No, he's been eating nothing but vegetables and like a little bit of like skinless chicken breast. Maybe she wasn't so much shaming people people but she was just legitimately asking gentlemen like hey man what's stopping you also genetics sure genetics play a big role dave yeah people just don't have it you know what i want to see what uh we'll see that guy's legs see if that guy's uh yeah dude what's going on downstairs you got dog let's see let's see your face he's probably butt ugly too you know what show us your face Let's see. Let's see your face. He's probably butt ugly, too. You know what? Show us your face.

He's definitely a butt ugly dude. He's hideous, man. Also, have you ever human decanted wine? I would ask him that as well. What a dumbass. I've got a party coming up in a couple weeks. Do you want to... Yeah, is he for hire? Oh. How much would it cost for you to do

a human decanter party, Dylan? Me being the decanter? Yeah. How many patrons? Yeah. There's not a price tag on that. You can't put a price tag on human decanting? Is that what you're saying? $10 billion.

That's my price tag. I feel like I would do it for much less. I feel like I'd be sad. This girl doubled down and responded to her tweet with another tweet from May 26th saying, asking for abs is not body shaming. Well, it kind of is. What does she look like? She's probably good looking because I feel like you couldn't send that tweet if you didn't

have supreme confidence in what you look like. Here's a funny one. I just typed in, dear men, what is preventing you into Twitter? The top one, it says, dear men, what is preventing you from transferring ownership of your various holdings and assets to me? That's from at Finger Blaster on Twitter. I don't know. I've never seen this photo before, but I did enjoy the response of just the dude standing against a fence with their stomachs pressed up against it, making it look like they have a six-pack.

Oh, those guys are shredded. Yeah, they're killing it. They're very happy with themselves. That's really funny. Those guys look happier than have a six-pack. Oh, those guys are shredded. Yeah, they're killing it. That's funny. Like, they're very happy with themselves. That's really funny. Those guys look happier than the dude in the photo. Oh, that guy's miserable. Yeah, that dude's like an hour away from death. You think that guy's had an IPA in the past five years?

No. No. No, dude. He doesn't know what pizza tastes like anymore. Mm-mm. He's miserable. No, he knows what cauliflower crust tastes like, though. Oh.

You know, cauliflower in the air fryer is not bad. Not as good as Brussels, but cauliflower pizza crust is just not. What's a Brussels? I don't know Brussels. The thing about cauliflower pizza crust is it's pizza crust that's made out of cauliflower. That's why it's not good. Yeah. I prefer mine made from just flour, not cauliflower.

Right. Sally got some flatbreads made out of cauliflower, and we started making tuna melts on them. And I have to say, it's pretty damn good. Well, it all goes into a tuna melt. I love tuna melt, man. Melted tuna. It's just tuna.

It's tuna. Yeah. You put the tuna on a cutting board in front of you, and then you just do a really sick guitar solo, and so you melt it. And that's how you melt it? I feel like there's a better way guitar solo, and so you melt it. That's how you melt it? I feel like there's a better way. No, that's what happens.

Is that really how you do it? Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. I did not know. Yeah, I actually got it in my sun basket last week. They sent me an electric guitar. It was very weird. I will mess up a tune about.

They sent you an amp, too? A little Fender Strat? Yeah, they asked me. They're like, do you have Sonos in your place? I was like, yeah. And they're like, all right, we're not going to send you the amp then. You're good.

Man. Yeah, so, dear men. Twitter's a weird place right now. There's some stuff trending that I just don't like that it's trending. About the whites one? Yeah, I don't like that that's trending. Yeah. I think that has to do with the cop.

That's a very disturbing video. We don't need to talk about it. Tough week. Did you know the guy is, sorry, a little weird tie-in, Texas tie-in. That guy is friends with Steven Jackson, Homer Spurs great. The guy who passed away? Yeah. Really?

Yeah, like Steven Jackson posted a video. It's really sad. That's just an awful, awful video. I don't get what that guy was thinking. Oh, I thought you meant Steven Jackson passed away. No, no, no, no. Oh, I was like, when did he die? Have you listened to his podcast, him and Matt Barnes?

No, I did not know he had one. They have one. Forgive me for not remembering the name, but it's pretty good. It's just like NBA, you know, tough guy talk. Yeah, I mean, dude, he's an absolute wild card. Yeah, I mean, he proved that. Malice in the Palace. Yeah.

He was kind of him and Ron Artest, 1A, 1B. Could I give a trash Pistons take right now? Yes. I almost didn't hate Steven Jackson during it because he was so ready to go that I was like, dude, I want this guy on my team a little bit. Absolutely. If he's going to defend Ron Artest like that, it's like, get that guy on my team a little bit absolutely if he's going to defend ron artest like that it's like get that guy on my team immediately it's port arthur texas his own oh it looks like the the cop has a custom maga hat that says make whites great again get out oh

man that's why that's trending holy shit this guy is a real piece of work yeah yeah that's not ideal derek chauvin is his name oh wait okay fuck yeah man are we okay well if that's real okay either way it looks like it's real if that's real i mean it doesn't really change the situation um like i mean we are i mean it does obviously makes it look way worse but like i mean he this is definitely murder either way yeah it is he's going away hopefully justice. Justice is served. Yeah, I know we don't get into serious stuff like that, but damn, dude. Yeah, sorry. No, no, it's fine. No other podcasts are going from human decanting to body shaming men to this.

We're covering all the ground today. We're all over the place. Good to be back in this. Like, wait. If this is real, this hat, I'm sorry. How do you wear that? Like, the MAGA hat by itself wasn't enough. Good to be back in the studio. Wait. If this is real, this hat, I'm sorry. How do you wear that? Like the MAGA hat by itself wasn't enough.

He had to take it to the next level. You know what? Did you all see the meme the other day? What? This couldn't have been a current photo because I think most college campuses are shut down. But it was just a photo of a dude wearing a MAGA hat backwards. And he's in class just looking at guns. Oh, my God. The girl just took a photo of him from across the room,

and she's like, well, I guess it's time to transfer. I mean, be a little bit more aware. Yeah, like read the room. Yeah, read the world around you. We had a kid. I'm not going to out him. He was a good kid, but he was sitting in class one day, and my buddy and I were sitting there.

And we looked over, and he had a piece of paper. And it just said, people two. And then it had a gun. And then he had a numbered list. And my buddy and I were the top two on the list. And we were like, uh. What? I think you told us about this before.

Yeah, and we were like, man, that's messed up. We were doing a group project with him, too. So we had to break off into a group right after. Did you get along? No, we thought we were getting along fine fine and so we ended up asking his brother he had an older brother that we were kind of not friends with but friendly with and we were like hey does did your brother have a gun and he was like uh yeah for hunting and we were like all right cool and we were kind of freaked out and we were in eighth grade or ninth grade at this point. So we end up telling a teacher that we liked

and we knew wouldn't do anything crazy. Because we had faith in this kid that he wasn't actually going to shoot us. That's his big deal, though, man. Yeah, they ended up talking to him. They suspended him for a month and he immediately apologized to us. He's like, sorry, it was a cruel joke.

I thought it was like, I would never actually do that. And we knew he was a gentle kid and we were like dude no worries like we were just obviously freaked out for numerous reasons but we didn't want anything bad happened to him because we truly didn't think he was going to do anything but like we had to tell somebody i felt i still feel kind of guilty telling people but like you have to oh you have to i would have 100 told somebody yeah when he came back, it was like, hey, no harm, no foul. We're all good. Let's not make this a thing.

How long was he gone? 30 days. That seems – That's a serious suspension. Did he go to like an alternative learning situation? Not sure. Dude, 30 days seems light for like that – for like if they really thought that he was going to do it. Maybe –

I don't think they actually thought he was going to do it. That's the thing. There was probably some like psychiatric evaluation involved too, I would assume. Yeah, like. What year was this? I was in eighth grade,

I think. Eighth or ninth grade, so it was. That was around. Post Columbine. Yeah, it was post. It was like 2001. 2000 and 2001.

A little freaky. Yeah. But. Yeesh. Yeah. Obviously not going to say his name because I don't want anything to come back to him.

And to be honest, if I saw him in the street today, I'd shake his hand and be like, what up? How you doing, man? Good to see you. We're not shaking hands right now. Yeah, that's true. Sorry. I'd elbow him. My bad.

We're just decanting. My bad. You know what? Did you notice in the match when Tom or somebody hit a good shot and they would go over and do the elbows? I get that they have to put on a show. But you're telling me that these guys haven't all been tested and they couldn't just high-five? Yeah, good point.

It's about perception, though. Yeah, I know. I know. You're right. I'm in the wrong here. I'm the jerk. But I still would love to see Tom and Peyton throw down a sick high-five. Were they touching in the Bundesliga game yesterday, David?

Shut up. It's tough. Dortmund. Dude, Dortmund, man. I didn't watch anything. You didn't watch it? How did I watch it and you didn't? Dude, I was so horned up to get back to the studio

that I just came right here after recording yesterday and I just loaded the studio up. I even vacuumed in here this morning, so it looked great for you guys when you came back. A lot of people are giving me shit for... Yeah, you did a good job. Thank you. Thank you.

A lot of people are giving me shit for hopping on the Munich bandw a spot over here but it's bandwagon but it's hard the dyson can't get everywhere it seems like it can why are people giving you a hard time apparently munich's a powerhouse in the bundesliga that's your home team that's what i said jared borslow j-bone pointed out that there's another team from munich that i should be on but didn't they get relegated they the other team from munich and I don't know what their name is. I don't know anything about them. All I know is that they are forever living in the shadow, and I don't think they've won a title since the 1960s.

So getting on that train just is not going to be fun for anybody. That's why when people give people shit for choosing a successful soccer team, it's like why would you choose a team that's never won anything to cheer for across the country like across the the ocean like that just sounds miserable that's like being like that's like living in london and being like dude i'm a browns guy now like i'm gonna be a lions in the dog pound actually there i think there are a good amount of lions fans and in london because the lions have played a couple games over there but but yeah, no one from London is going to be like,

Oi! The fucking Browns! They're mental! Baker's going mental! How did they say mental so much? Mental. This is a good transition, actually, to Vince Young. And brilliant, too.

Brilliant. That's a brilliant idea. Brilliant is one of those words that, yeah, we never use that. Also, something I did like that I heard over there was just people, instead of legend, they were just shortening it to ledge. Oh, absolute ledge. That's tight. Absolute ledge. Dave, Vince Young's Steakhouse had a tweet.

We should probably explain that Vince Young has a steakhouse. Make a dope tomahawk steak, man. How does Vince Young have a steakhouse? He has very little to do with the restaurant. I think he might have a little steak in it. Actually, I'm pretty sure that he has zero steak in it at this point. It's just the name on the building. I think he probably sold it. Do you think he eats free?

No. I don't know. If my name was on the front of that and I had no steak in the restaurant, I would still walk in there and I'd eat a meal and walk out. I would eat every night. If a cop came up to me at Will DeFreeze's Steakhouse and was like, hey, sir, I'd be like, no, I am Will DeFreeze. I am not paying for a tomahawk steak in my own steakhouse.

Yeah, that thing's been in Austin, I think, since probably his rookie season in the NFL. So it's been around for a while. It's pretty good. It's called the Vince Young Steakhouse. Well, I was very surprised yesterday. People I follow on Twitter were just kind of making one-off references to it, and it wasn't trending.

And I was like, what did Vince Young – did Vince Young – you know, he's had some troubles. Sure. Root for the guy. Like, what, did he do something? Go and look. There was a tweet sent from the atvinchyongsteakhouse Twitter account. And it's in response to our mayor, Mayor Adler.

It says, when at Mayor Adler tries to override at Greg Abbott, who is our governor, and extend stay-at-home orders and preventing us from being able to provide for our staff and families. And he included a, oh, it's a video. It's not just a photo. It's of Lance from the Lance 30 for 30 doing the fuck you, fuck you. Okay. Which is topical. Lance Armstrong, Austin guy.

I'm sure him and Vince Young are buddies. I'm sure they're, clearly they've crossed paths, right? They've shared a tomahawk steak at Vince Young Steakhouse before. And how do you think Vince Young Steakhouse corporate handled this tweet when they saw it on the TL? They have since apologized. Well, I know I don't I have no problem with the tweet. Politics behind it.

I don't care. That's a good tweet. Yeah, that tweet. Slash steakhouse is with a little bit of edge. You know, you want to hear the apology. It's from the notes app. No, it's not. I swear to God the Notes app. No, it's not. I swear to God.

They went Notes? It's not official unless it's from the Notes app. It says, a note from the owner. We have deleted this morning's tweet regarding the stay-at-home order as the video we used contained offensive language that is not representative of the Vince Young Steakhouse brand. We apologize to Mayor Adler and our guests for any offense caused by an opinion that was posted out of frustration over circumstances in which we all find ourselves.

Moving forward, this account will be solely restaurant content, specials, and support for the city of Austin and the great state of Texas. I'm looking forward to the restaurant content. They didn't totally apologize. No, it's an apology like if you were offended. Yeah, that's like, yeah. Like, I'm sorry that you got mad about that. Yeah. You know, it's a nice change of pace from just the, you know,

the boring, you know, brand marketing that we see out there. I don't know. I kind of appreciate a little personality behind it. I don't mind at all. Yeah. It's not going to deter me from wanting to go. I don't know. I kind of appreciate a little personality behind it. I don't mind at all. Yeah. It's not going to deter me from wanting to go there. I don't mind those

corporate Twitter accounts doing meme stuff anymore. It used to bother me being like, oh, how do you do fellow kids? But now they've actually, a lot of these places have hired good people for it where they're actually pretty funny.

We had a Grindex Christmas party there one time. I was actually at that one and it was pre me being a full-time i want to say 2013 what'd you order i absolutely ordered an absurd probably bone-in ribeye or something it was a big time scotch night if i recall we need to we need to start putting uh money away for our christmas party this year can i also let's do it at vince young we gotta support vince dude i'm. I'm fine with going to Vince Young. I'm not joking.

People in Texas are steak snobs. You guys can admit this. Steak snobs to a T. And I have never heard anyone be like, dude, Vince Young Steakhouse sucks. No, it's good. It's just named after Vince Young, so you don't take it as seriously as you probably should. It is not. Okay, it's not. I have my top tier of steakhouses, and I've got like Papa's Brothers

or Papa's Brothers and Bob's Steak and Chop House. Those are up there. Nick and Sam's. Vince Young's is in the ballpark. It's good. And it's got like a dope ambiance. They run some really kind of cringy commercials. Can we get a private room at Vince Young young steakhouse yes dude yeah we did when we did the grand x1 there i'm not kidding

when big t-shirt matt made them go get a video a dvd of the 2000 of the rose bowl the national championship game and we watched the national championship game while we ate in the private room in the private room i'm not making that up. It was off, thankfully, but still, it was playing. Why didn't you guys just flip it over to Longhorn Network? This might have been pre-Longhorn Network, or maybe, I don't know. No, Longhorn Network's been around for a while. It's always on. Oh, man.

Those are different times, David. I am looking at their private room. It looks like you can get about 14 people in there, which seems pretty up our alley for this. Yeah, that's right up our alley. Oh, man. We should definitely do our Christmas party there. We didn't do a steakhouse last year.

We wanted to. I think we need to do it this year. If you're not already planning for your Christmas party right now. You might not even have one. Randy and Brett still out there? And Parks. Hell yeah. Parks is just sitting on the couch playing video games,

and Randy and Brett are about there? Dude, yeah. And Parks. Hell yeah. Parks is just sitting on the couch playing video games, and Randy and Brett are about to start painting the exit. I like that we have Randy and Brett here now because they're going to sort out what we do with the extra room instead of us having to figure it out. Well, I don't know. You were testing the audio, Will, but I think we determined we're going to turn it into a gaming room. Dude, hell yeah.

Let's do it. I like how we have the grown-ups in here and the three kids are out there. So I tried to say what's up to Parks while he was playing on his phone, and he didn't even look up. And then I walked by and was fake, like air punching right by his stomach. What's up? What's up, big cat? He didn't even budge.

He was in another world. He gets glued into that game, man. Speaking of Matt Barnes. Which is why this works so well because I'm in here and it's easy to keep him distracted with the phone. I might bring Randy up one time just to hang out with him. Do you think he would enjoy Randy? Yeah.

He's got a mini Randy at home. He's going to be really confused about how Stella grew so much. Hey, Parks, here's Stella. Stella has a penis now. Anyway. Stella has a penis now. Would you drink canine decanted wine? David, I'm not drinking human or any other kind of species decanted wine.

I would consider, you know, decanting with Rosie. But she's got some urinary problems and stuff like that. So name your next podcast. I don't think it'd be fair to her. Decanting with Rosie. We only do rosés with Rosie, though. See, rosé you've got to have chilled. So you've got to have like. So you've got to have a chill-ass bladder.

Yeah. Should our next segment just be about human decanting? Let's run it back. What if it's real baller status, and some people like it chilled, so they make the guy, when he does the catheter, they make him go get in a cryo chamber. Stay in the chamber. You come out with like the mittens on.

That's just doing a lot, really. I'm imagining him wearing like a tuxedo, like a tuxedo like you see at a nice restaurant, but like chaps instead of actual pants, so he can actually just like access everything pretty easily. Yeah, I envision some kind of, not a kilt, but like a kilt-like man skirt so you can just lift up and pour and then just set it back down. Something like that. Yeah, we understand. Okay. Yeah, we can imagine it, Dylan.

Thank you, though. You never know how big your pour is going to be. When that glass disappears underneath the kilt, you don't know what's coming out next. You know what always creeped me out? There's a restaurant called the Tilted Kilt. And the name, just for some reason, it's like in a world of creepy restaurant names, Tilted Kilt might be too far. Twin Peaks is up there.

Twin Peaks, though. Oh, you're talking about boobs, huh? Yeah, at least it's like Tilted Kilt like, makes me think of like a creepy old dude like at the bar like. Yeah. Watching the waitress like bend over. I want you to tilt that kilt up for me. Yeah. What?

Like chill out, dude. Excuse me? Man. Twin Peaks has a great menu though. Looks like Parks has switched to watching a YouTube video because it's connected to my watch. Cool. What's he watching? It's hard to say.

It just says YouTube on there. He's trying to figure out how to spell human decanting. Come on, man. Let's talk about our friends over at Sun Basket. We've gotten these in the mail. I mean, they're incredible. Let's talk about our friends over at Sun Basket. We've gotten these in the mail.

I mean, they're incredible. In terms of these delivery services, Sun Basket, and this isn't just me saying this. When I told people that we had a sponsorship with Sun Basket, people were like, oh, dude, I've heard that's like the best one. And I was like, yeah, here's some news for you. It is the best one. I had Moroccan chicken with a sauce that I don't even know how to explain. I don't even know what it's called. Crime sauce?

Crime. Crime. Creamy. Sweet potato mash, roasted tagarashi salmon with miso-glazed eggplant, and black bean tostadas diablo with cabbage slaw and guacamole. Dude, that is a lot going on in that plate. I kind of want to try that one. Are you trying to act like I didn't have the wild Alaskan skin on salmon fillets? Nobody was acting like that.

You kind of were. You know, people like to say Vince Young Steakhouse has a great steak, but how about this? How about the applewood bacon-wrapped beef filet mignon, organic fresh Italian pork sausages, Asiago cheese tortellini? In terms of tortellinis,

Asiago cheese is up there with some of the best. I love it. If you're looking to reduce unnecessary trips out or trying to avoid sold-out grocery stores, then check out Sun Basket. It's a perfect and delicious solution for the times that we're living in. Just think about it. Do you even want to go to the grocery store like every Sunday like you used to?

No. No. Just stop doing it then. You don't have to be like that. What Sun Basket does is they deliver healthy, delicious meals straight to your door. They have delicious recipes for all kinds of dietary preferences, including paleo, gluten-free, Mediterranean, vegetarian, and more.

That's pretty good for you, Dylan. Aren't you a big Mediterranean guy? Love Mediterranean. Love it. They make it easy and convenient with pre-portioned and ready-to-prep and cooked meals. You can enjoy a full dinner of organic produce and clean ingredients in as little as 15 minutes, no matter how much experience you have in the kitchen. Again, Dylan, hardly

an experience. Okay, we get it. Each Sun Basket offers a wide range of 15 minutes no matter how much experience you have in the kitchen. Again, Dylan, hardly any experience. Okay, we get it. Okay. Each Sun Basket offers a wide range of recipes to choose from, so you can try mouthwatering dishes like hoisin. I mean, we already said them. Hoisin steak, stripped lettuce cups with pickled daikon and carrots. I got that one as well, and I have to say, big fan. I need to try that one too.

I didn't even know what daikon was, and all of a sudden I was like, oh shit, this is pickled? Legitimately have no clue what Dicon is. Dumbass. Yeah. And even better, Sun Basket facilities

have the highest levels of food and employee safety. They're reinforcing strict adherence to their existing standards and operating procedures and increasing sanitation frequency in their distribution centers

so you know that you and your family is just protected. It's big for you and the homie as well, Dylan. Oh yeah. Right now, Sun Basket is offering $35 off your order when you go right away.

Right now to sunbasket.com slash Randy and enter promo code Randy at checkout. That's sunbasket.com slash R-A-N-D-Y and promo code Randy at checkout for $35 off your order. Again, sunbasket.com slash Randy, and enter promo code Randy. Big time. Is it time for this weekend of fun? I believe it is, Will. I'm not entirely sure what the weather is doing this weekend. I haven't checked it yet.

I think it's good. If it's even somewhat dry, I will tell you right now, catch Stella and I at Zilker. Okay. I might literally catch you there. Parks will not be right now, catch Stella and I at Zilker. Okay. I might literally catch you there. Parks will not be with us, however. He'll be in Agtown, a.k.a. Arlington, Texas, with his mom, visiting some family. But like I said, catch me at Zilker. Do you have a play date set up with any boys up there for Saturday when he's away?

Not yet, but I will hop right on that. Again, if the weather's nice, I might get the sticks out and do something with them. Hey, idiot, it's going to be nice. I just said that. Jeez, oh, Pete. I don't believe you, though, David. 88. It's going to be hot. 88's not that bad, though. I'll take 88. Are we bringing 88 back?

That's sticks weather. Like I said, I want to swing the sticks in some capacity. I don't need to play 18. But even if I go to the range and hit them for a few, that would be nice. You can go to the swing academy. I need to knock the dust off, man. And that is my weekend in fun.

Well, just nodding me. Did you make a Nas joke? Yeah. Rooftop like we bring an 88 back? Yeah. I thought you were making a Cowboys reference. No, no. I'm not trying to do seedy lamb content right now.

Is that also a dish from Sun Basket? Seedy lamb? Ooh, I love the seedy lamb. Just papaya seeds on lamb. Would it be papaya? Probably not. I don't know. We could do pomegranate.

Pomegranate makes antioxidants. They're so annoying. Hey. Blue pommies. Dylan, man, I've been kind of riding your ass this pod, and I'm going to continue doing it here. We literally have a tee time for tomorrow. Are you playing or not?

Dave, I don't know. And here's why I don't know. I've got to find time to do the mail-in. I thought I was doing it with you in the morning. Well, we have a pod to record in the morning, so we can run him back-to-back if you want. Who are we doing it with? Brett.

Oh, yeah, we can just knock it right out. Okay, you want to do that? Yeah. Okay, so. Our tee time is about until 1.20. For those listening, Malin will be released a little bit later tomorrow. Just be patient.

And I'll be honest, you can blame me because I'm the one who made the tee time. No, it's on me because I have parks all day today, and then we have happy hour tonight and so it wasn't a great day for me to do two episodes. Well, it's definitely your fault. Okay.

So that works then. Okay. We've got a tea time tomorrow. Friday, Saturday. Am I going to have time to go home and check in on Homegirl for a little bit before I go swing sticks with you? If we start recording at 9.30, knock the Patreon out. Maybe move it to 9.00.

Maybe. To be safe. If Will's cool with that. Okay. We'll figure it out. We don't need to go through the whole scale right now. It's good radio. I don't know. Hey, I don't know what I'm going to do the rest of the weekend.

I mean, it looks like it's going to be nice. Maybe I'll, I don't know, I want to get in some water or something. If you want to come by, I'm getting some catheters, and I think Will's getting a few bottles of red if you just want to swing through. Yeah, I got a Lambrusco, which might hurt coming out, but I also have some light pinos that might be a little better. Damn. Oh, God.

Yeah, I mean, I. People are so weird. Like I said, I mean, I appreciate the invite. That's all I was looking for. I think Brett just took Parks to go use the potty. We're good. Dude, that's huge. That's huge.

Brett's definitely texting Caroline right now, like, I'm just fucking babysitting here now. All right, last thing on the human decanting. Can you do it with, like, other... Could you do it with, like, let's say you wanted to do martinis. Could you throw some gin or vodka up in there? Or would that be shaken? Stop doing that.

Stirred? Imagine stirred. I imagine you can put any liquid up there that you put your mind to. Stirred, you don't actually put the vodka in there. You just put it in the glass and then stir it. Stir it with your piece? Mm-hmm. That's my weekend fun.

Sounds like a blast. Man, that's sick. Ooh, you know what I'm going to do? Technically, you know what? I'm going to say my weekend starts immediately after I leave the office. I'm going to go to the Westlake HEB.

Oh, my gosh. The best HEB in town. You're a wild man. I am fucking wild. Best butcher in town, too. Dude, you're loco. Yeah. Yeah, not a lot.

Actually, I'm not sure, but I think we may have an alfresco dinner on Friday night at a restaurant. For those who aren't as luxurious as you, can you explain what that means? That means we're eating on a patio. Okay. The restaurant, we've gone and looked, and we've seen that they are taking the correct precautions. And so I think we're going to eat at this place and just chill out and hang out. What type of cuisine are we talking?

Hard to say. It's kind of a smorgasbord. It's Jason's Deli. No, it's not Jason's Deli. They do have those two tables outside. I think we're doing that. I'm not sure if we're going to actually follow through on it, but we've got the resi on the books, so we'll see.

And then outside of that, you know, just regular weekend stuff, we've got Bundesliga. I don't know any of the games. To be honest – What is Wolfs – what's the Wolfs – Wolfsburg? Wolfsburg? What do they got? They have the worst uniforms in town.

Those were bad last week. Those fucking sucked. Laser beams. Lasers. They look like what you would wear if you entered a league of Nerf guns. It just looked like extreme late 90s Nerfy. I think I just need to dedicate myself to getting more into Bundesliga at this point point since the only yeah i don't like that i'm more into it than you yeah you kind of are like you you actually watched yesterday where i was just like i'll record it

oh i was like one to like text you i was like oh well i wasn't watching i want to spoil it yeah i just i don't know who's the blonde dude that i hate erling holland he's so like dutch or whatever looking he's norweg, but he looks very, like, yeah. There's something about him that I'm just like, dude, I hate this guy. It's his face. It's his face. He's very punchable. He's not going away anytime soon, David.

I'm sorry. Yeah, he's good. He's the guy. And, yeah, I don't really know. Kind of wide open. We are going. We're heading out of town. We're going somewhere next weekend, so I wouldn't mind keeping a little low-key this weekend. Not going, we're heading out of town. We're going, we're going somewhere next weekend.

So I wouldn't mind keeping a little low key this weekend. Not going anywhere far. We're going to be nice. We're going to some, we're going to like a river house. Dude, I love river houses. It's just an hour and a half away.

Just need to get out of town for a few days. It's a house on a river. I love river houses. Is there so far? Ooh, lake house or river house? Ooh, in Texas, I'm saying river.

Man, there are some dope rivers around Central Texas. I'm talking like spring fed, crystal clear stuff, and it's awesome. The Frio, which means cold. Catch me on one of those, man. It's hard to say no to lake house. Comal. Let's name all the rivers. Guadalupe.

They used to call me Will DeFrio in prison. Really? Really you just know that you had cold ass bars killed people or what no i just had the coldest bladder for decanting oh my god i would spit it out at 42 degrees exactly that's uh that seems like i don't know how you survive with that cold i would make I'll make toilet wine and then just. Ooh, imagine decanting. Right off the chute, huh? Human decanting a toilet wine. You got to think that that brings a lot of things in play. You got to think I'm just not going to do that. You know?

Just kill me. I mean. Yeah, I don't want to. I think it would. I don't want to kill you, though. Okay, thank you. Yeah. That's all I got.

What else? That's all I got. I else? That's all I got. I think we've covered all bases here. Oh, I will be drinking some Vizzies. Well, I mean, come on. Please make sure to tag us. Tomorrow on the course. Okay, bitch.

Vizzies will happen. Assuming you play. I don't even know what your deal is. You're in the same boat, Will. You're not getting off scout free. Oh, I'm aware. I'm aware. We need people to make sure to tag us in their busy posts.

Tag us. The more you tag us, the more busy is going to like us. Yeah. Tag them. Tag us. It legit helps us if you tag us and them at the same time. So please do. Just make it happen.

Guys, I'm not going to lie. That felt good. It felt real good. It felt good. I think I came out of the gates a little wobbly, but I think I hit my stride, and I think we all just decanted together. Yeah. We came together.

Yeah. Those who decant together come together and stay together or something. No, that makes a lot of sense. I think that's what they say. You should get that tattoo. How many patrons? Two million.

See, you're just not a man of the people. We actually have a human decanter in the Watch Media Network. Kevin, he does our TikToks. Oh, yeah. Oh, we need to send him. He wants some Wilmonds gear. Can we send him that? Of course he does.

Yeah, we can make that happen. Of course he does. Sorry, I didn't respond to your DM, Kevin. Yeah, Kevin can get a free order. He's earned it. Shouts to the backer that lives in my neighborhood, by the way. Got to mention him. He reached out to me just down the street, man.

Fantastic. Y'all should hang out. I told him let's get a beer. Maybe do a front yard beer or something. Presumably because your neighborhood is not single, young. It's like families. He looks to be my age maybe a little bit younger than me but um mature lad sure sure he uh i think he put clues together he saw my pictures

of the the hike that was right around this right in my neighborhood and of course i talked about you know being close to the green belt and all that he put it together so there we go making connections out here oh look at you yeah link build decant that's right sell that shirt

yeah he asked me if I wanted to play we have a tennis court in the hood a community one he asked if I wanted to play I was like

dude let's get some doubles off you don't want that smoke I'll go I will definitely play some tennis I'll regard some tennis I actually told him I'm so bad that he doesn't want to play

I only play pickleball now. People were playing that the other day out there, actually. Do not poo-poo pickleball. I've never played it. I would like to, though. It's fun. It's fun. My uncle had a court, and it was just an absolute blast.

It's just weird. It's essentially just a tennis ball that's just pickled overnight. Yeah, yeah. I'm not very good at pickling stuff. Like, I've never actually done it. The rackets are also pickled, by the way. It seems like a lot of pickle juice. Yeah, it's weird.

And, yeah, it's kind of like, you know how when you open a can of tennis balls and you sniff them how good it smells? It just smells like vinegar. Yeah, this one, like, you're actually just, like, snorting vinegar and stuff. So there was a peppercorn in one once, and it just absolutely shattered my nasal passage. Yikes. I hate to hear that. The tennis ball smell is just the best. It's a goat, dude.

It's a goat. Do they make that candle? They should. I've told you about my candle idea, right? A candle that smells like a candle that's just been blown out. A candle candle. Think about that. Dude, someone's going to steal that. I know. Do something with it right now. Think about that.

Dude, someone's going to steal that. I know. Do something with it right now. That does numbers. Any candle producers out there, holler at your boy. You've got about an hour until people listen to that. Candle wax that's human decanted and then turned back into a candle. Oh, my God. Holy shit.

So it's like you melt the wax down, catheter up there, get it out, then you do your candle. That's the sound of our heads exploding. We've got a million-dollar business right here. Damn. Should we get out of here? I guess we should. I don't want to.

That was fun. It feels too good being in here with everybody. How long did we go? Oh, yeah. We did good. All right. All right, guys. It's been real. Happy hour tonight.

Happy hour tonight. Washed Media on YouTube. good all right all right guys it's been real happy hour tonight happy hour tonight uh washed media on youtube if you want to just go directly there youtube.com slash washed media uh we will have we do have a special guest coming tonight a recurring guest even uh one of my favorites and we're going to be talking about something that i'm very excited about tonight's going to be lit uh outside of that not much else um oh crop tops for the ladies out there. Or the guys. Or the guys.

The kings, too. Yeah, crop tops. Washmedia.com slash shop. If you're human decanting wine, a crop top is perfect. You don't have to lift up your shirt, man. It is. They are white crop tops, so that makes it harder. You don't want to spill any wine while you're pissing it out.

But, you know, just be careful. I've drank wine in, like, white linen stuff before linen stuff before do like a buttery shard or something that's true doesn't stain as much yeah alright bye bye

bye bye bye bye bye bye bye bye

bye bye bye bye bye bye bye bye

bye bye bye bye bye you