Circling Back - Kacey Musgraves is Crazy Horny | Circling Back 3-12-2

Episode Date: March 12, 2026

Spacey Kacey released a very horny and catchy single, a trashy fight video hits the internet, we're torn on the driverless Zoox cars, and This Weekend in Fun. Support us on Patreon and receive weekly episodes for as low $5 per month: ⁠⁠www.patreon.com/circlingbackpodcast⁠⁠ Watch all of our full episodes on YouTube: ⁠⁠www.youtube.com/washedmedia⁠⁠ Shop Washed Merch: ⁠⁠www.washedmedia.shop⁠⁠ •    (00:00) Fun & Easy Banter    •    (11:30) Spacey Kacey    •    (25:00) Fight of the Year Candidate    •    (39:45) Zoox    •    (48:20) This Weekend in Fu Support This Episode’s Sponsors:    -    Fair Harbor: Head to ⁠FairHarborClothing.com⁠ and use code CB20 for 20% off your full price order now through 3/31. -   Lucy: Get 20% off your first order when you buy online with code STEAM. And if you don’t want to wait, just head to ⁠⁠lucy.co/stores⁠⁠ to find Lucy near you and grab it today.       - Aura Frames: For a limited time, listeners can get 35 dollars off their best-selling Carver Mat frame with code CIRCLING. -     Squarespace: Check out ⁠squarespace.com/⁠STEAM for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch, use OFFER CODE: STEAM to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

All right, we're back. Thursday morning. It's Tuesday. Circling back podcast. You know what it is. I'm Dave. I'm going to sit here. Get a little comfy.

I've got my... People don't realize I'm sitting on a pillow. And I've got my lumbar support here. It's my little station here. Feeling good. Trying to look better on clips. You got your situation going, don't you? The chair doesn't lend itself to the clips.

Straight up. Didn't know that when we bought them. It's not a very clippy chair? No, because, like, I'm angled my, my, from here to my knees, they're angled up. So it just looks very odd. Okay. Yeah. Randy doesn't like when I bring that up, because I think he wishes I would have brought that up before we bought the chairs.

I, to be fair, I didn't even think about that. That was a thing, so. That shouldn't be something that he concerns himself with too much. Well, I bitch about it, like once a month. Okay. So, he, you know, he has to deal. You know, there's room over here on this couch, big dog. My goal is to never have to sit on that couch

It's kind of comfy Everyone who sits on it either breaks it or complains about it Well listen it's a cheap piece of shit But it is it's weird it doesn't look bad It's weirdly comfortable It doesn't I don't think it looks bad in clips at all I think it looks good Perfect size

It just breaks Yeah it's just stinky It kind of breaks like the toilet seat That you sat on that one time I did break a toilet seat once by sitting on it That is true Did you hear about this? Dan Dan register

I've broken a toilet too I sat on the seat and it just snapped into. I was having sex in college. Yeah, I wasn't having sex. I was sitting down to go potty. There's two different things. We're a lot of all kinds of interesting things about Dan's sex. You know what?

I just want to use that little anecdote from Dan, filling in for Randy here, to tease listener voicemails, which dropped tomorrow. And we didn't plan this, but. We've had two extreme curtain pullbacks. Tuesday on exactly five minutes, we talked some grand-necked stuff for probably 10 minutes. And then tomorrow on listener voicemails, we get to learn a lot about Dan. Yeah. Did not expect to learn that about Dan yesterday.

It was fun. You know, to be fair, I did know about this. I never heard the actual story. Yeah. I figured it was a good alley up for you to kind of promote the... We'll leave it there. Thanks for sharing a little bit about your life for the... enjoyment of the listeners and us for that matter.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think the folks at home are going to really enjoy it. So it's a great time to be a patron. There's no better time to be a patron. There's not. It's always a good time because that's the best way you can support the show. Support the boys. I promise you.

I promise you what you received tomorrow via content. Well, you're like, well, we haven't done this before. I'm still processing. We've never done that. How you doing, Danny? Just adding a little edge to the puck. Yeah, we need a little edge. Randy provides none.

He used to. He's just smooth. He got a girlfriend. He got soft. Dude, he did, man. Well, he went from Valsall to lockdown with a girlfriend. I forgot he was a Vossel. And so he just provided no...

He never really had edge. Entertainment from that department. He's only... He's edgy one week out of the year, and it's Renfair week. Yes. That's when he's at his edgiest. Dan, what do you got going on? How's it looking over there?

Is the chat popping? Right now. people are kind of rolling in. Let's get it more active. People, let's talk in the chat. Spice it up. Let me throw that RT out there. You know your boy should have done that earlier.

I hit him with one, no big deal. It's a good podcasting when you just pull up in Twitter in the middle of your... There it is, boom. That's going to change everything. Ladies and gentlemen, Dylan Shivery. Oh, man, very happy to be here. Been moving a little bit of a little bit. different this morning, you know.

Went on a nice walk around the lake this morning after dropping parks off at school. Man, how about that morning? Borderline crispy. Beautiful. It was downright cold this morning. Great walk. Just fired up the Spotify, and I was greeted with something that just kind of changed the course of my day a little bit. Oh, is this the first time you've ever, you listened to a vulgar display of power?

Yeah. It goes pretty hard. It's life-changing. Yeah. I don't know who that is. Who that's by. Pantera. Okay.

Yeah, I was, I never had a Pantera phase, which surprises zero people out there. That's why you're not the favorite. You never, you never had a Pantera phase. There was a backer to my, that said to my face on Saturday night that I was her least favorite on the show. And it hurt my feelings. What? It's true. She said it right to my face.

I don't remember her name, even if I did. wouldn't say it out loud. I don't want to bring any negative attention. But yeah. I mean, I think, I think she was... You know what? That chick is hilarious. I think she was like, it was lighthearted, but he cut. I'm a human being. I have feelings. Say it online all you want, but to my face. I respect it. Come on. I think more people need to tell you that. Listen, dog, you're just still cashing checks. Yeah, doesn't matter. I do make a living still. Dylan, you've had some good pause this year. I think I have. Yeah, like three or four. You had the, you know what?

You had the consensus good best draft. That's right. I did. I think I was in my bag for the Iowa frat story. Chad, drop your top five dealing moments of 2020. Yeah, I would love to read through that. How cool is to have a producer who's just actively engaging and doing some farming there? Or what the kids call it, right?

You got a farm. No, man. Although I did see somebody hit the comments yesterday Because we still get a lot of comments on that appetizer draft And there was one that I really liked And it was unlike any other And you'll know why It said

Dylan destroyed y'all Okay Tater skins in the third round is an absolute steel It's not No it's not It's not Randy won hands down Dylan's picks were abysmal

That's from Captain Nemo Actual Captain Nemo Actual Nemo Actual needs to learn ball That's absolutely. No one has had that take. And I'm not doing this to dunk on Randy because he's not here. But most people thought Randy's draft was just objectively bad. I didn't. They thought mine was pretty average.

I was accused of fumbling. And then they thought Dillans was good because he took something that chicken wings, which is arguably not an appetizer. But Randy's fried pickles in the first round, it felt like a major reach to me. And I like fried pickles. Fried pickles. Are you kidding me? It's a pickle.

I mean, what are we doing? That's like taking a, um, that's like taking a guy who had missed most of the year with knee surgery, like late in the first. You're like, yeah, well, he's going to be there. He would have been there in the third because nobody wants to touch him because of the medical. Taking fried pickles is like taking Jordan Travis after the injury. It's like taking J.J. Barreya in the back half of the first

when he's going to be there the whole time. Yeah, I mean, it's a different sport. Also, he has a ring. Also, it was a seminal part of that team. and even LeBron and Dwayne Wade will admit that he was the key to that championship. For real, though, you get fried pickles as an app. How many are you actually eating five, six, max? I'm not feeling good about it either.

If I'm getting something fried, I want that fried to have like something beneficial inside it, like protein. Listen, fried battered with ranch dressing is going to hit. It's going to hit. And when you get inside there and there's a pickle in there, like, look, it tastes good. Don't get me wrong. it is not a first-round appetizer. No way, shape, or form. Get out of here with that shit.

Sorry, Randy. Newsletter drops tomorrow. Wash.com. Great time to go subscribe to this pod on YouTube. YouTube.com slash circling back. That right there sounded like a nitro coal brew. Last one. Sorry, guys.

Did you really? Yeah. I went to the store Monday. Dan deserves it, man. He deserves it. How are we going? We were just trucking through things. You know what?

about Randy, Randy doesn't drink coffee. That's true. He doesn't. Dan, how many, are you been having two a day? No. That's a Brett move. This is one. I've been limited myself to one a day.

Brett's even drinking those. Sometimes Brett's entire lunch will be from the snack bin in there. He'll just clear it out. I mean, that's fine. We buy them so people will eat them. Unless, like, the sun chips. I feel like I'm the only person eating sun chips. I did also buy a coffee before I came in.

so this is my second coffee the day, but I need it. Are you doing my, what were you drinking before? Like 600 milligrams a day? Oh, dude, I'm clearing 1,000 a day easy. Caffeine? Yeah, between energy drinks and coffee, I have a problem. My heart's going to explode before 40. No.

I hope not. What are you, 31? I'm 34. Damn. Yeah. A whole bag of bones over here. Damn, you're right at that age. We're like, you got to figure it out.

Buddy. That ain't happened. I guess this is growing up. I don't like what you're doing. Man, I'm never going to grow out of my Fair Harbor phase. I'll tell you that right now. Nah, son. I see you got yours on today.

I have my Fair Harbor crew neck on. I really enjoy this thing. I really like it. Man, this show is brought to you by Fair Harbor. Makers of the world's most comfortable swimwear are the same comfort that's earned thousands of five-star reviews built into their super soft clothes, made to be worn hard and broken in by the life you live. Is that broken in by the life you live? It is, man. Yep.

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Your full price order now through March 31st. Once again, that's Fair Harbor, H-A-R-B-R-Cloat.com for 20% off. Make sure you use our code CB-20. so they know we sent you. Would you listen to on your little walk today? A few things, but I started the walk off with the Spacey Casey John, her new song called Dry Spell. Dry Spell probably a reference to the drought that we've experienced here in southern half of Texas, central Texas. It is a reference to a drought, just not the one you're thinking of.

Okay, probably a reference to the University of Texas. their drought in men's basketball championships, as they've never won one. They've never won one, and they're certainly not winning one this season. But that is not what this is about. Possibly he might miss the tournament now? They're really stumbling across the finish line. No. Who did they lose to?

Ole Miss. Chris Beard Revenge. Well, they lost to, I believe they lost to OU in their regular season finale. And then Ole Miss in the first round of the SEC champion. We're on bubble watch. You don't want. to lose to your rival and then the guy that you had to let go right for putting his hands on his girlfriend allegedly allegedly um but her song is not about either of those things all righty well

what's it about bud sex if you've been paying attention to her promotion leading up to this album drop she's all about like being super horny like super horny why are you why are you pinning her in that corner Even this picture with the steer there, it has horns implying horniness. Wow, dude. Maybe a bowl situation? I don't know how to properly identify these things. But yeah, yeah, sure. That there's a bull-hoss.

Well, like, you look at Bevo, it's a longhorn, and people just call them a steer. Are you going, did I read that slack wrong? Or that, what you said, you said you're going out to get some Bive this weekend. And I was like, are you going to, like, a Texas baseball game? You're going to have to get some B-vo this weekend? I didn't send that. If y'all are new here, Dave makes these jokes, and I want to actually send these things.

Who are you talking to? You. No, but who's y'all are new here? The listeners. The listeners? The stillies. You don't think the stillies now? The Stoley's and the Duff-Fs. Yeah.

The D-Fs, shout out to the D-Fs. And the soft cores. What do y'all call them? Softies. That's good. Have you heard this song yet, Dave? I have. This new Casey John.

I have. Do you watch the music? video that accompanies the song. No, I, no. I was saving that for later. I was saving that for after the family goes to bed. Yeah, that's a good idea. That's disgusting.

That's a good idea. That's not even funny. Why would you make me make that? She's dressed way down in the video. She's just going to the grocery store and a, like, oversized sweatshirt and some shorts. That's when she's the prettiest. Yeah, she, I mean, she still looks incredible. I'm low-key in love of there.

Because I think a lot of people are out there. Man, I know one of our friends. I can't imagine. in that when when chels is at home making you hard-boiled eggs i know that you bring into the office in a in a non-container jose knows she's my number one but kacy you know close number two she's she's she's she's she's she's lurking she's lurking she's lurking she's coming for the title she's right there dude she's just got to make her move uh okay well what let's let's talk about the song i didn't really dig into it for like is it is it commentary on um i don't know

She just wants some D, it sounds like. And the thing is, Casey Musgraves. What the hell? Being, why is it? Why can't a female artist just have a song? And without guys like you, be like, oh, does you? What's a D? Well, she sits on the washing machine.

Okay? For a thrill. Oh, okay. So because she's a female, she does laundry. Maybe she's pledging Zeta. What if she says, ain't nobody's tool up in my shed? Oh, because she's a female, she has to work. in the shed. Ain't nobody's boots under my bed. Oh, okay. So now you're making commentary on

her not cleaning up the house. Ain't nobody's truck up in my drive. Oh, because she's from East Texas. She likes trucks. For a late night call for a real good time, ain't no new notches on my belt. And I'm tired of keeping my hands to myself. She wants to put those hands on somebody else, Dave. Can I ask what the washing machine Zeta reference was? Uh, so they would put like new members on. Who's they? Like Zeta or like any sorority, right? Isn't this like,

it's an urban legend. Urban legend kind of shit. That's what I was going for. Because everyone's heard this. They circled the jiggly parts. I have not heard this. Yes, you have. The jiggly parts of fat.

They circle like, oh, you need to tighten the shit up. Oh, okay. Yeah. Because the fat parts jiggle. Or straight out, ladies, if I was in a sorority back in the day, I would not have done that. They would not have done that. done that. Nope. She starts off by saying it's been a real long 355 days since she's had sex,

we presume. And the last time, it wasn't good anyway. Ooh, somebody, somebody's taking a big out on that one. Oh, can somebody, can I tweet the Safari Flaps picture? Somebody's got, somebody's got their calendar out like, wait, what's the last time we were together? Like, oh, fuck, this is about me, isn't it? Wait, 355 is too specific. I think that's probably the point, But like somebody knows. I'm so lonely, lonely with a capital H. If you know what I mean, I've been sitting on the washing machine. Do you think she got stuck in it?

She doesn't have a stepson to pull her out. She legitimately says she's been sitting on it. But maybe she wants to get stuck in it. Every time, those videos, like, I feel like it's so easy to unstick yourself. Like, you know, like, oh, you're stuck under the coffee table? what do you mean? Just back out. How are you stuck underneath the coffee table? It's so funny watching you like try to explain to women like how they should get unstuck or like what they are allowed to get stuck under.

It's crazy that you're not an ally. Have you ever gotten stuck pulling clothes out of the dryer? I don't talk about that publicly anymore. I just feel like you just got just maybe back out the same way you went in, you know? Everyone gets clothes out of the dryer differently. Yeah, I'm not going to tell women how to get fucking clothes out of their dryer. Well, if they need help getting unstuck, I'm happy to talk them through it. Oh, I bet.

Without touching them. Like, look, all you got to do seriously, just like, just bet, just go in reverse, and you're going to be fine. It's a very big opening. Oh. You know what I mean? For sure. Maybe some of those bigger gals, it'd be different, you know. Jesus.

I guess we're just sigh shaming now? No, I'm not. I guess we're just losing the chat. Just trying to make sense. I feel like the chat's turning on you as we're just different. speak. Women of STEM are furious. I don't care about the chat.

I care about the chat. You're the type of dude to do like laundry once every three weeks, and it's just like a massive load, and like half your shit's wrinkled and you pull it out of the dryer. No. You got that vibe.

No. You do. That's not me. I keep the laundry moving pretty well. I got to do laundry for the little guy, too, man. I know it's more crazy in there. I don't trust him doing his own laundry yet. No.

I've taught him. No. I won't just set him loose. The detergent bottle is a little heavy for a little guy It is It's not It's heavy You gotta have the exact poor

I just feel like Casey Musgraves Someone who is very talented Famous Very beautiful It's feeling she could She could get late if she wanted to That's such a guy thing Like thinking like

Oh it's so easy I'm just gonna go out and sleep with the first I don't think it's Dillon that walks by I don't think it's always easy, but I think for Casey Musgraves, it probably is. Dan? Anything? You want to back me up here?

She's intimidating. She's a singer, and she's a very pretty young woman. You don't factor in how hard these attractive young ladies have it. You're right. Guys are too intimidated, as Dave said, to walk and approach them. I've never been an attractive young lady. She said, ain't nobody but the chickens are getting laid. 9-1-1, it's officially a cry for help.

Don't call 911 for this. 311 is probably the way to go. Call 311. Yeah, don't waste the... 311's probably down if you call them. Yeah. Y'all, I'm going through a dry spell. Yep.

It's a good song. I do like the song. It's catchy. I got the bacon and no one to bring it home to. It's a drought out here. She doesn't need your money. Waiting on a storm. You think you're mad because she doesn't need your money.

You're scared of that. I think it's time for me to take the bull by the horns. Nice You would have taken a bull by the horns Probably not Yeah, do it every day Something Every day I wake up and say

What, let's do it Let's ride That ain't you, man Yeah It is me It is me I think she's a talent I think

What does my wife think When she gets in the car And that's the song I'm listening to She's got me acting up Dude She's like Huh Yeah you

You like her Huh Like yeah she's good I support Texas artists Be careful with that Spotify wrapped at the end of the year Yeah You don't want to get exposed

I bet yours is a Spotify Unwrapped knowing your history This fucking guy College You're about to hit him With the lap track And it was gonna Don't do it

No I just turn it up In case You know he hits In the future Okay He'll have better stuff On Laugh watch He'll have better stuff

At some point That was good I think the chat's probably Rocking with it Unlike you They turned on you they turned on you. Chat, have you turned on me?

Somebody in the chat said, one of Dylan's best moments was when he was out for a week. That's so mean, dude. God, was it, it was probably that young lady who said to my face that I'm her least favorite at the Dallas meeting. She was a wag, wasn't she? Or was she like a listener, listener? She was a wag and a listener.

Yeah. That's so sick. I love that our listeners are transparent. I think when she's, She said it, she felt that she had crossed the line, and she was like, her look on her face, like some life left her face. She was like, oh. But it was too late.

Yeah, it was too late. I cried myself to sleep Saturday night because of that. Did you cry to sleep or did you pass out? I cried myself to sleep, like I just said. Is that why you had all those Kleenexes surrounding your bed? Yes. All those tears? Yes.

Man. Well, Casey's, I can't wait. The whole album, when's the whole album drop? I'm interested. I don't know. Okay. It's going to be on vinyl. I do know.

Vinyl. You can't get anywhere else. No Apple, no Spotify. Found out that Sturgle's drummer was at the event I was at, the crazy event that was happening. I didn't talk to him, but he was there. That's sick. Let's see. Let's see when this thing comes out.

I actually walked over to his table and just started, like, hitting one of his beats. And, like, looking at him until he looked at me. And then I was escorted out. That's why I left early. What's the word, dude? Let's see. May 1st. The album is called Middle of Nowhere.

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That's a uraframes.com promo code circling. Support the show by mentioning us at checkout terms and conditions do apply. I stumbled across a video. It's a fight of the year by far. This is not that different than this reminded me of high school a little bit. I'm not saying we were this extreme, but this has every hallmark of like a high school field fight party amongst like otherwise friends. It starts a little slow, but you kind of get the idea. You can just play.

Here's what I love about this fight. Everyone walks away with not a scrape, not a bruise, nothing. The only injury, I bet somebody like rolled their ankle or something. Like there's not anything serious. Just like, there's no, like, grazing blows. Straight up, I'm going to tell you, no haymakers that land. No. It's just one of the dumbest, drunkest fights I've ever seen.

And this is clearly in the Deep South. Shirts off. There's a Mississippi State shirt. There's a lot of crokeys. There's trucks. This guy's got his shirt off. You never really get to see his face. And, like, you're kind of watching it, and you're waiting, like,

is this dude about to level somebody? Or you're like, oh, it's just going to be a fist that just levels this guy. Well, let's just watch. We may have to jump up to, like, the 120 part. But let's just, let's get a little vibe from it. and the audio apologies for the language if there's anything uh oh oh why isn't it playing oh god damn he slept he slept him oh god damn he slept him he slept oh davy slept him got right back up okay now this news my MVP maroon shirt trying to like sick trying to break it up a lot of god

dams. These guys are really into Morgan Wallen. That's fine. There's so many crokeys, too. The guy wants smoke from him wherever I can get it. We don't even see who's punching him. Yeah, it just comes out of frame.

Look at that slow, though. So the guy who's recording this is clearly standing up on the front wheel. Is that what's happening here? I don't know. I'm a goddamn best friend. Just a bunch of friends fighting each other. Just a bunch of dudes. A lot of dirt roads.

Budlight lime probably in the bottom here. No, baby. Stop. And then his girlfriend, yeah, he tries to get the middle of it. This guy, I went to high school. This guy's got his ducos up. Not the fucker. Bad punch.

Totally over-extended himself. Okay, there's a rib kick from the ground coming up here. This is the best part. Oh, no, Maroon got dropped. No, just wait. He'll be back. He kicks him from the ground. He kicks the guy that he was already trying. He kicked his boy.

No one's on the same. Everybody's just changing sides. This is just a punch who you can punch. This is a Royal Rumble. Bok on. Hey, hey, hey, everybody. Hey, everybody. Man, this is just, this is fight of the year.

As God is, as my witness, he is broken in half. This is one, they're the next day. they're like, oh man, like what do we? I done, I done hit Taylor a lot of times. Dude, I spurt him. Yeah. I done hit Taylor. Oh, God damn.

He's been my brother since I was four years old. So for a lot of reasons, I'm just glad there wasn't, there weren't cell phones back in the day. But like, I was almost 100% involved in like a night like this that just like two of my buddies been at it. Like, and I can't even imagine like if, it's. if the shit, like how annoying and embarrassing would be if I saw it 10 years later, I'd be like, oh, God, trying to break it all. Y'all are best friends. God, don't need me fighting.

You all are best friends. What are you doing? I definitely broke up a fight between two guys, two of my best buddies who were on the football team, who were way bigger than me, me and like other guys are trying to break it up. But we're like, why are y'all fighting? Why? You just start sounding country when you're in the middle of that? Oh, yeah.

Dude, once you get to the field, once you get to the field, man, it's like, God damn it, leave it be. Oh, buddy. You gotta regret this. Me and my friend got into a fight at a Del Taco parking lot, like three o'clock in the morning. And he caught me, like, right under the eyes.

So I had a shiner. Oh, like a real fight. Yeah, real fight. We were drunk, we were hammered. We both landed a couple shots, but gave me a shiner. Next day, that was perfect. It was a white trash ghetto bash.

Oh, that's go. So it was great. Everyone's like, is that makeup like now? Did you guys squash it by the next day? Yeah, we were good. by like the next hour. Okay. I've never,

I've never gotten in a fist fight with a friend. There was one, the same two guys got to fight in the Waterburger parking lot. How Texas, like high school football is that? That's great.

So great. When I got in my high school fight, I may have told this part of it, but the guy I fought and I won my fight, but the guy, his best friend, his name was Thomas, and he was like

the guy at school that was like, like undefeated and like looked for fights and he was just he was terrifying and so for the next like few weeks at school dude he this guy was like I watched him fight one time and it was it was kind of a fight where like everyone's hype like oh we're gonna see a fight and then five seconds later it's like oh my god let's get out of here because it was just ugly anyway I would just look open my shoulder like this guy's gonna come from me I know he is I mean they were best friends and then I saw him at like a house party like a couple months later

And I was like, extra nice. Like, everything's cool, right? We cool? He was like, yeah, yeah, we're fine.

He probably, you probably earned some respect from him. This guy would have smoked me. What was his deal? He was just like a, I think he trained. I think he trained. But he was in really good.

He was probably six, two at the time, probably like one ninety five, but like ripped. He was in really good shape and just knew how to, he just knew how to fight. You ever talk to him?

When I, when I, I'd smooth things over. Like these days, I mean. No, I don't know what he's up to. I think he married, I think he married someone from our high school. He's probably dead.

I hope not. He was nice enough to me. I didn't, me, I would have preemptively put him in an arm bar. I was smart enough not to, not to poke that bad. Dude, that's the thing that you don't realize. So the arm bar was there.

It's always there. I don't think I could have gotten this cat in an arm bar. No, it's there. Do you guys have kids in high school that would bring, like, brass knucks or knives to fights? No. It was nuts. We'd always get in the fights with the skater kids.

I had a skateboard broken over my head in high school. It was great. Oh, no. But no, we would, like, show up the fights to, you know, throw down, and these kids would bring literal brass knucks and knives. I'm like, what are you going to use? That's messed up, man. That's for people who don't know how to fight.

You can fuck someone's dope up big time. Brass knucks are kind of mafia. Straight up, whoever invented brass knuckles, it's a good invention. Those are probably very helpful back in the day. Because it still makes you fight, right? I mean, a knife, you just slash it somebody. You still got to land a punch to make that brass knuckle count.

Yeah. The thing that somebody did in, like, an eighth grade fight, I remember, he had a roll of quarters. Dude, that happened in my high school. And, like, he, like, hit the guy. Dude, I watched it happen. Yeah, there's a guy. We call it a, y'all, he packed his fist. He packed his fist.

Oh, we didn't call it that, but two guys that were. on my baseball team, they were older than me. And one of them just had beef with this guy. And he brought a roll of quarters to school and was waiting behind, like, a door in the locker room. And then when my other guy walked through, he fucking flung the door open and just swung on his ass with quarters.

You shouldn't do that in a one-on-one fight. No. You do that when you think you're about to get jumped or something. A roll of quarters. Show up to a brawl. If you show up to the field brawl with Daryl, Taylor, and Jenkins in the bull. That guy was a problem, man.

He wasn't well liked, as you can imagine. Yeah, because he would sucker punch people in a packed fist. Like, that's not cool. Roll the quarters. Dude, especially like the guy walked in, like the arm bar was right there. Right. Because it's really easy to get someone in an arm bar. Me, I would just pull guard immediately.

Pull guard? Like in football? No. Bro. What does that mean? Man, I just, if you don't know it by now in life, you're never going to know it. I feel like you could teach me in the next five seconds. Man, oh, this guy thinks he can learn in five seconds.

I mean, I just want to know what it is. Your son does it. Probably. Dan, what is it? It's in jihitsu. It's when you get on your back and you welcome the fight to the ground. Pull guard. Bro.

If you don't know, you think you can just get a black belt. Jitsu is all on the ground pretty much. It's crazy. It's crazy. It's crazy you think. you're just going to be gifted a black belt. Do you think like a sensei is going to walk in here right now? I don't think that.

Sometimes I wonder, dude. Ironically, Max Holloway just got his black belt for his fight against Charles, where he got dominated on the ground. Parks just earned a green stripe. Bro, I'm trying to earn some red stripes this weekend. He's got a white belt still, obviously. He got a green stripe because he learned, what's the move he learned? He's real proud of it.

I forgot. He'll hook? They're learning hill hooks. I can't wait until he heel hooks you. He's really good at the Americana. You know what that is? Man, I can use one right now, dude. You know what that is, Dan drank the last coffee?

Do you know what the Americana is? Americana is that like, what is that? What is that, like Jason Isbell? If someone's on the ground, you get your arm under them, and then you kind of this one and you just wedge it up so their arm moves like this. Ooh, really putting some stress on that. A lot of stress in the arm. It's immediate tap situation.

Yeah. Damn. He's real proud of it. He's good at it. He's learning some ish, dude. Is he just champing to try it out on somebody? No, no, no. He's a softy.

He's non-confrontational. He's non-confrontational. Good skills to learn, though. Talk amongst yourself. Well, yeah, you want to end the fight, not start. Fucking pee-boy, 35 minutes in. It's crazy, Dave. As he dances out of frame.

An issue. I drink a lot of stuff. I know. I drink a lot of stuff. That's wild. Just mid-pod. Hold it. Dude, he can't do it, man.

I mean, we're live. We're live. We can't do anything about it. It's not that we can do about it. So what's going on with you? What's going on with me? Outside of that. Outside of you being edged up for Casey Musgraves.

Dude, not a lot, man. Not a lot at all, actually. I'm just chilling right now. I'm cooling. Yeah. You guys just have Fridays off, huh? For the most part? I mean, we come in, but we don't usually do anything on Fridays.

Gosh, you get some fucking, you know, hit the links. Get 18 in. Maybe not. I don't play much golf anymore. You should. It's sad. Get it back. What's stopping you?

Honestly, I don't really have that much fun playing like I used to. Because I'm not good. I have to be, I have to shoot well, or like, at least strike the ball well to enjoy my time out there. And I don't care enough to be good to, like, go practice. So I'm just in this never-ending loop of mediocrity in it. I don't like it. No, you got this. You got to get back.

Get back on the saddle. That is quick, though. Dave's really quick. He is. Okay. I was checking the leaderboard. Okay. It's suspended, by the way.

It's... Suspending, why? I think there's a storm going on right now. Really? It looked like it was... It was perfect, but I think there's a quick storm. It's Florida, though, for you. Fifteen-minute storms.

Hey, man, wait five minutes. We had a hail storm yesterday. We did that as I was driving out? Yeah. That was so weird. Hoping my fucking... windshield. And then 10 minutes later, it was perfect outside.

Uh-oh. Dave's got allergies now, too. No, that's a... You got a pouchy? I had a pouch. Okay. Loose. Anyway, what did you guys talk about?

Just seeing what I was up to. Dylan's giving up on the game of golf, I heard. I have played... I have played in late 2025. We played the Scramble. We did, and I played at UT Golf Club, too. So how about that? Those are pretty good.

You want those tastes like, add a little vodka, and that is a high noon. It's exactly like a high noon. You're right. I've been into the push cart game, though. I like walking now. Get my steps in. That's good. Even if I don't play well, I'll get like 20,000 steps.

Is it like a five-mile journey around golf about? Whatever 20,000. Probably more for you because you're always walking all over the place. I'm looking for your ball. That's true. That's fair. This guy. Oh, goodness.

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Dude, I, because I love a Waymo. And Azooks is like a more fun version, it seems like. These things piss me off. Why? Just pull it up, Dan. Why don't you embrace technology? Dan, utilize Google image? Embrace technology.

Man, it's just technology and AI especially. They're changing everything. You don't like a driverless Uber? No, I don't mind. I find it. No, I, uh, it's just, this is like the dumbest thing I've ever seen. I said it to rain. Because it looks dumb?

Yeah, I think it looks dumb as hell. Just looks like a pod, like a living room pod. Exactly. On wheels. Right. Can you face each other? I believe so. That's sick.

I don't want to face the people I'm riding with. I want to face you. I want to look forward. I want to face you. You spent, he said the smallest image. Look how tiny this image is. Yeah, that's tough. Come on, Dave.

I'll find another one. Zooks. Utilize Google. Yeah. I'm unfamiliar with it. Oh, yeah, you do face each other. That sucks. Dude, that's awesome.

This is a party Uber. There should be a rule that autonomous vehicles have to look like, like, cool vehicle. These things don't look like they go fast. It looks more like, you're trying to get, like, three blocks to the next bar. You can't get on the highway on this thing. Why are you out on the Zooks, dog? This is the future. It just looks like a little...

It's lame as hell. Yeah. No, I'm so in. I'd rather have a golf cart. Yeah. Like, this thing tops out at 40, right? This is like you're on the Google campus. This is what they get transported in.

This is an Amazon, John? To do their, like, engineering John, that's about to get replaced. Yeah. No shocker that Dylan supports the Amazon, John. He loves Bezos. Hey, catch me helping your girl into a Zooks after the bar. I don't think she's going to need help. I mean, it's...

It's not high off the ground. Yeah. I'm a gentleman, though. I'm going to open the door for her. I'm going to put my hand in the small of Chelsea's back and help her in. Don't do that, dude. Come on. Just be like a high draft prospect's dad when he's around their college girlfriend.

Yeah, that's... That hits for a lot of people. I get it. But, man, I'm just going to maintain eye contact with whoever's sitting across from me. Well, it sounds like it's going to be Chels. We're going to be playing Fletzies. And you're going to be sitting right there. Like, why are you playing Fletzies?

I don't know. Because we're in the Zooks. I'm acting different. I turn into a comedian when I get into Zooks. I think better have, like, a good sound system in it. It doesn't. I'm going to go ahead and let you know. You don't know that?

It probably doesn't have one. Dude, I'd be jamming in a Waymo. You don't like Waymos? Why is that image so tiny? I wrote in the Waymo once, and it was fine. And, you know, it was fine. Other than, like, other than that... They're not self-driving, right?

It's somebody that's piloting. There's somebody monitoring this. There's like a control... It's a remote-controlled car from India. No, no, no. They self-drive. They don't. Yes, they do.

There's somebody monitoring. I know that for a fact because there's one over here, because this intersection over here, Old Torp and Southamar, it cannot figure it out, and it's all of them. Yeah, because they're in India. No, it's not... They're not...

They're not remote control. It's not a fucking drone. They have to step in, they have to step in when Waymo fucks up. That's when, like, they get notified that it's, like, it's frozen or something. Are you afraid of getting yeated off in the interpass? No. I will say mine approached a light, a red light quicker than I would like to. I was like, I'm going to stop?

They accelerate really quickly. They won't go over the speed limit, but they will accelerate fast, which I... Mine refused to speed, and I just kept calling on a pussy. Yeah, it will not go even one mile per hour over the speed limit. I was like, hey. They're on the highways now, you know. Yeah, just cruising in the left lane. Yeah.

I have not seen that. Yeah. Galo left lane, Waymo. That bothers me. It shouldn't mean the left. You can't go to speed limit in the left line. I'm not getting on the left line. I'm not getting on my highway.

No, no, no. I promise you that. Nah. I'm so in, dude. When are they coming to Austin? I'll be their first customer. Soon, actually. That's fucking go.

I'm sad that I no longer live within the Waymo zone Yeah you do I'm outside the fence No I'm not It stops They're in my neighborhood They're not in mine

It stops between us I saw I saw the map Really? Yeah You dumb motherfucker I'm just gonna start driving in your house And order in a car Man you you moved to the wrong neck of the woods

Boy on the wrong side of the tracks Why didn't you Wait you looked like time about You looked up the map So, like when you pull up over and it. So I moved and then I was like, okay, I know that I'm outside the zone. I just accepted that. And then it expanded further south, but I'm still outside.

So it wouldn't drop you off there? No. No matter what? It goes as far as like that gold's there on William Cannon. I like that two-week stretch when we started committing domestic acts of tear by lighting these on fire. Yeah, that was sorry, dude. It's like the same people who threw all the lime scooters. bird scooters like in a creeks in no lake austin yeah what was the point of that those things

are trash no those are still fun they're they're they're fun no the word dude when those are like peeking and you were just it was like acl or south by week probably right now and you're just like oh i'm just gonna go drive around oh here's some dip shit on a scooter doesn't really end think he thinks the laws don't apply to him i've had like a dozen friends get smoked on scooters a lot of injuries But yeah. But they're fun. If you don't get smoke. Imagine what I'm going to do to a Zooks.

First Zooks, I say. Imagine what I'm going to do inside the Zooks. Do you just not support getting into an immigrant's car for Uber or Lyft? I prefer not to have to talk to a stranger when I'm being driven. They don't. They don't speak English. They don't talk as much. Like controlling the climate.

Back in the day, they were excited to talk. Now the Uber drivers don't talk as much. I actually like talking to the driver. to the driver. I like hearing their stories. And there's no tipping. There's no tipping. Oh, wow.

Shocker, this guy doesn't want to tip. You're right. Well, tipping culture's out of fucking control. You know, tipping. Tipping culture is just a way to keep wages down. You're right. Have you ever gone to Moody? Moody Center?

Yeah. Where they had like the self-checkout for beers and food and stuff? An option for tip. There's an option for, who am I tipping? Who am I tipping? I've become. Mr. Moody? When this first started, like when they added the tip thing on the turn, you know,

they turned the little iPad around. At first I was like a shame to like hit zero. Now I have zero shame. I'll do it right in front of their face. I'm just so over it. If you earn a tip, I'm very happy to give you one. Oh, yeah. If you just take my order, I'm not giving you a tip.

Take my order. I should bring an iPad for you guys after every podcast. 20%, 35%, You have to flip it I'd be much more inclined to tip you You have to flip it and turn around Like you have something else to do So it's not awkward

And hoping you'll get a tip And then you come back and see It's the same price that was there before I still gonna finish the audio Oh All right well fuck Zooks I'll probably ride one at some point I'm not gonna have a choice

Autonomous vehicles are gonna change everything Do you think your kid's gonna drive one day down? I've had this I've had this thought I also wonder I wonder if my kid's going to be I go to college if it's going to be obsolete

He's going to be a plumber But uh Driving Yeah I think he will I think he will But I'm not confident in saying that He's I mean he's only five years away

He's 11 Dan for this next segment There's a specific drop Are you ready for it? Brod let's go out this weekend There's a crazy event happening I like to turn up Bro, there's a crazy event happening.

We had the party and it was lit. I got yelled out by a prostitute. Let's just go have fun and they'd go a little. Let's go. This weekend and fun, presented by Lucy. What you got in your cheek there, bud. You got a Lucy. It's an 8 milligram apple ice breaker as I usually have one in when I'm recording.

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Nicotine is an addictive chemical. Ah, Dan, what you got this weekend, bud? Hey, so I found out I don't have to work tomorrow, so that's cool. So maybe golf. If you guys are down. I'm open. Okay. Saturday, uh, girls kid has a soccer game, so I'll probably go to that. And then for the most part,

just kind of pay attention to the players. Try to win some money. Minwu Lee, Russell Henley, Cam Young. Those are the picks. Yeah. Mav. Mav is up there.

Tommy Lad. I don't have Mav or Tommy. Fuck them. Tommy Ladd's so sick with no Nike. sponsorship. He's just free to do what he wants. What he wants is to wear whatever the golf course has. He's just not a killer, though, man. I think he's going to prove you wrong.

I hope so. I like that. Players would be a nice notch in his belt. Straight up. Oh, also my co-host for Softcore History, Rob Fox. His kid has a birthday party, so. You're going to be the guy who goes and just drinks too much? I'm going to stop by. He lives around the corner from me so I can walk. Where do you live? You don't have to give the exact place.

Circle C. Oh, you do? Yeah. Oh, all right. I didn't know that. So you do go to the Slaughter, H.E.B. Uh, yeah, Slaughter or the one off 1826. Both good. Okay.

How about that? Telling Shurvy. My son and my partner has a school play tomorrow, 130. Greece? Beauty and the Beast. Ah. So I'll be, I look forward to that. Uh, he also has a baseball practice Sunday.

Um, It's going to be a beautiful weekend in Austin, Texas. And I have no plans, which I'm excited about. Big cool down coming next week. I'm just going to see where the wind takes me. Yeah, we'll get cooler next week. Probably south coming out of the north once that front blows there. I got nothing going on.

I plan to sleep in Saturday, which I haven't been able to sleep in in a long time, and I just look forward to that. God, you're botching this. I know, dude, I just. Micah's party. Oh, yeah, shit. My bad. That's Saturday.

We're going to Micah's party. I forgot. Interesting. R-SVP and everything. I will be there. I'm taking... Are you not going? Chelson Parks are going.

Didn't get the end by, dog. Damn. I see how it is, Micah. I'm taking Chelsea Parks. Well, that's an oversight. You understand? Yeah. Okay.

Man, people are wondering, what's Dave? Well, we got our first tee ball game this evening. Very, very excited. We were out. We took a little BP last night. It's looking good. He's got... He's really got those, I tell him, like, just get that bat point toward the sky, swing smooth.

It's got a little step into it, and he's elevating the ball. I don't, he can't hit it out of the infield yet, but he's certainly going to, he's certainly going to hit it through the infield because he's hitting the ball hard. So that'll be fun tonight, going to have great weather, looking forward to it. Let's go, Cubbies. Has he adopted the modern game when it comes to either home run or strikeout? Right, yeah. It's all about, all about launch angle. that's all I'm considering about.

Just elevating the ball, just dropping his hands, dropping that shoulder and just getting it up in the air. Don't worry about it. That's all you got to do. Tomorrow, I'm playing golf. I'm playing a shamble at UT Golf Club with our accountant. It sounds so much worse, but I say our accountant. He's also just our friend.

Yeah, he's our friend, but it's just funny to tell people. I'm playing a golf, my accountant. Because people are like, oh, this guy's close to his accountant. Yeah. Like, this guy must have it like that. So, yeah, we're going to play. We'll see how that goes. He's texting me today, like, man, how you feeling for tomorrow?

You should start calling him the accountant. The accountant. Dude, good movie. Never saw the sequel. I haven't seen the sequel either. John Berthal. But then you just insinuate that he's autistic. What?

The accountant. How? Because he is in the movie. He is very much autistic in the movie. Ah. Oh, yeah. Also a hitman. Also a hit man.

He's nice with it. Very effective. He's good. It's a tough combo. The lust for blood and also neurodivergence. Mike is on Saturday. I didn't tell you all. I said this out there.

I went to steak Freitz night at Murray's last night on the east side. 35 bucks steak. They don't let you choose how they cook it. It's a medium cooked steak. They bring out. Slice it up. Get your choice of a sauce. fries. Fries are good. And martini.

$35. Pretty good deal. Wait, where is this? I'm sorry? Murray's. Okay. And also a top three Guinness pour in town, no doubt. How different are these Guinness pours, you know? I'm sorry. I'm not buying the hype of a good Guinness poor. You learn how to pour it Guinness and that's that.

Oh, my God. Honestly, Dan, I don't want to make you do more work, but can't take that out. Unfortunately, I'm alive. Doing it for his own good. I don't want people, like, I don't want people to go from, like, him being, like, he's got the high of the draft, the app draft, and then they would just absolutely roast him for just not knowing ball.

Saturday, St. Paddy's Day party. Bringing the kids. Check out the drip, dripping springs. And then Sunday, players championship. It can be good to see Hove. It's going to be Hove Tommy. I got Hove Tommy. I also like,

Cam Young. It's Cam Young this week. And then, uh, my heart's ready to, you know, be hurt again. Scotty's going to be lurking. He's always lurking. Yeah. So he's always there. So there you go. Fun times. Dan will be back Monday. I will be back Monday. No, Randy's getting back. Randy's getting back Monday. But Dan will be here Monday. Randy will be back Tuesday. So any, any parting words for the folks? Have a wonderful. Check the chat. We got a few. We got a few Wonderful, safe, awesome fun weekend, including the backer who said I was her least favorite. I want her to also have a really good weekend.

Was she the one, darn it. There was a lot of backup couples at that thing. So, I don't know. Yeah, there were. What's the Chad saying? You know what? Actually, for your sake, Dylan, I hope her and a boyfriend get into like a very inconvenient fight.

Okay. Okay. I'm not going to co-sign that, but I like what you're doing. Like they work it out. Yeah. They have really good awesome makeup sex. Okay. But I hope it's for like five to six hours a problem.

Yeah. You want them to sleep on the couch one night. Think about it. Yeah. Like threatened to do so. Okay. All right. Anything in the chat popping?

Not really. Oh, man. Slow news day, huh? Internet's dead. Internet's dead, dude. All right. Well, fun. we'll see you Monday. Oh, we'll see tomorrow for listener voicemail.

Yeah, though. All right. Yeah, stay tuned for that, dude. It's a dozy. It's a dozy. Bye-bye. Bye.