Circling Back - Mall Fights & Mounted TVs

Episode Date: March 8, 2021

Too Much Dip's own KJ Ellis fills in for Dillon Cheverere who is getting thirst traps off in Mexico. On today's slate was everyone's Weekend in Fun, Will's a mounted TV guy now, the absolute brawl at Bath & Body Works, Jeff Bezos's ex-wife is marrying a science teacher, and Brett's Breaking News. Support us on Patreon and receive weekly episodes for as low $5 per month: www.patreon.com/circlingbackpodcast Watch all of our full episodes on YouTube: www.youtube.com/washedmedia Shop Washed Merch: www.washedmedia.shop (0:00) Fun & Easy Banter (16:34) Recapping This Weekend in Fun (39:58) Bath & Body Works Brawl (55:30) Jeff Bezos’s Ex-Wife Marrying A Science Teacher (1:07:02) Brett’s Breaking News Support This Episode’s Sponsors Sun Basket: www.sunbasket.com/steam ($35 off your order!) Public Rec: www.publicrec.com/circling (10% off!) Bloomscape: www.bloomscape.com (STEAM for 15% off your $100 order) --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/circling-back/message Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

all right we're back circling back podcast presented by busy hard seltzer the only hard seltzer with vitamin c and superfood acerola my name is will defriest to my right david ruff oh what is up, Viz Nation? Where are my Vizzers at? Where are they? I'm just hypothetical. I think they're at their desks right now listening to our podcast. There's no better way to start a Monday, a work week, than thinking about that antioxidant vitamin C

and with the noted super fruit, acerola. No better way. I'm thinking about it right now. I'm thinking about having one after work. I just want to bite into one of those super fruits right now. We got special guests in the building today because Dylan's too busy getting thirst traps off in Mexico. None other than Too Much Dip's own KJ Ellis.

What's up, fam? What's good? Feeling invisible over here. Wow. That actually doesn't make sense because now I sound like I'm saying I'm invisible. But let's go with two Zs in that. So is it invincible or invisible that you were going with? You just can't see me.

Oh, okay. There it is. John Cena, of all people, tied it together. John Cena is in, like, every other commercial. Fast and Furious 44 or whatever is coming out. It's John Cena, Snoop Dogg. other commercial uh fast furious 44 whatever's coming out it's john cena snoop dog they are the and then jake from state farm or whatever oh okay the dude whose arms are just grotesquely large and veiny and muscular i wasn't aware that john cena was in the new fast and furious yeah and so

when dave started listing off people that were going to be in it i was like damn we have snoop dog the allstate guy, and John Cena in the new Fast and Furious. Let's fucking go. It is Jake from State Farm, right? Yeah. He would fit in. Yeah.

Yeah. He's got the look. You've got to have biceps. It's all you need. He doesn't have the voice for it. That's my issue. No, he lacks charisma, some might say. I said, forget about it, cuh.

How's everyone feeling today? I'm feeling great. There's just a different energy in here today. It's just really palpable. Dude, today's different. It is different. It's kind of nice not having Dylan here. Okay.

I'll stand in Dylan's defense. What the hell? Hey. It's difficult to go on a trip and be ready, like thirst trap ready before your card goes into the card reader. Are the reports true that he didn't have a shirt on when he checked in? Dude, he had, he had a Corona when he was walking off the plane. Did he, did he like, did he bring makeup and like airbrush something onto his abs before he did the thirst trap? Absolutely. He might've been wearing the t-shirt, the abs T-shirt that you can get on spring break.

I love it. What do you think his DMs looked like after that? I don't know, but he's solo on this trip. Like a swim-up bar. The swim-up suite. He's just chilling at Nobu right now, just drinking coffee. You know, I can't get past the fact that he is solo on a trip in Mexico and is so out on the game of golf that he's not even going to go play.

Yeah. A nice course. By himself, just fire up the Bluetooth speaker, listen to this pod, listen to Too Much Dip, listen to Club Cool, Sunday Scaries. Thank you. Maybe brunch. Maybe brunch. There you go. He could listen to brunch.

And he's not doing that. No. Because he's so out on golf. No. I asked him early on when he planned this trip i was like so what do you want to do on this trip he's like i want to do nothing he's like i want to bring a book drink some coffee like that plan got completely derailed the second he walked into the room and tossed on his sun hat and and ripped the shirt off well you're missing a step

he walked into the room set up the tripod put his phone on it hit record walked back out the room came in and did like the whole hgtv intro shot like it's the first, walked back out the room, came in, and did, like, the whole HGTV intro shot. Like, it's the first time he's been in the room. He's like, oh, what's up? No shirt, full-length mirror, right in the shot. It was pretty impressive. I saw where a lot of people were wondering, like, is he on crankcation? And I just, I'm not sure that's a thing.

What else do you do in a hotel room when you're alone? That's a great point i mean i don't do that but i've heard that's what other people do just i respect that all right wrestle he sent me he sent me a video yesterday because his room is sick i mean we all saw on instagram it opens up to the pool very sick and he sent me a video of the room like doing a walkthrough of it and he was like okay okay like that's the last thing i'll send and i was like dude you're not you're not like bugging me. Like, I'm not jealous that you're on vacation. I literally just got back from being on like an anniversary trip. Like, I'm not gonna, I'm not complaining mentally. You better not send that shit to me. Yeah. You're in a different boat. I'll fly down

there and just, I'll swim up to that suite and scare the heck out of him. He's hanging out with beautiful babies and you're just swaddling them. Right. Last night was a rough one. My man's was hungry. Was he feasting? God. It was the classic, I can't do anything to make this baby calm down at 3 a.m. As I'm just standing there, here's a thirst trap in my underwear. Just like trying all these different little rocking

and like, you know, getting. He's spitting out the passy. And there's nothing. Can I ask a question? Yeah. As a father, what am I? Am I in limbo right now? Mother to be.

You're pre-dad. So I'm pre-dad. And when the baby's crying, like is it a dick move if I just put on like my noise canceling headphones? It's not an option. I can't just like sit, I can't just sit there and like at least dampen the sound. Okay.

While you're in the room attending to that, you're not saying like, Hey, put in the reliever. You're up Sally. Like I'm just zoning out over here. No, no. Can I, can I just toss them on? I don't even need to listen to anything just to dampen the noise a little bit? Or is that like a bad look? No, I brought this up to Alyssa because I don't really like to brag or to discuss our finances publicly,

but I do own noise-canceling headphones. And what they do is they cancel the noise first and foremost. And I was like, why don't we just put these on? the noise first and foremost. I was like, why don't we just put these on? Because that's part of the worst thing is he's screaming so loud and it's jarring and it throws you off. You feel like you're in Verdansk

and you're just pinned down. You're just here everywhere. Somebody just stunned you. Somebody threw smoke out of nowhere. You think Klein's got your back and all of a sudden he's running somewhere else. Klein's over there with deployable cover. I'm looking for a babysitter.

I just, yeah, I think you can do it. But, yeah, obviously you can't just put him on and, like, zone out, like, the last scene in Days to Confuse. No, no. Gets in bed and throws the headphones on and slow rides blaring. No, I'm just imagining more of more of like I'm cutting the grass, which as we know, I don't do anyway. Right. But you're a turf guy.

I might just put on some of those things. No, to answer your question, yes. You can do that. But there's something – KJ knows more about this than I do, but there's something to like learning like which cry – what the cry – like connecting them with like what works. That makes sense. And it's like, oh, that's an I'm hungry cry.

Oh, that's an I'm overtired cry, which is the most frustrating because it's like are you overtired? Because I just put you in the crib and you didn't go to sleep. So I don't know what you want me to do. Normally that's a situation where you just got to hold them and then they fall asleep. And then if you're me, you're scared to put them into the crib because you don't want to wake them up. But nine times out of ten, you're fine. So we just lost our audience. I apologize.

Whatever. Should we do some programming notes? Let's hit it. First and foremost, go follow Circling Backpot and Watch Media on the Grom. Leave a review and five-star rating. Tell a friend about the podcast. If you want to see our beautiful faces doing this podcast, you can always head over to YouTube.com slash Washed Media.

That's YouTube.com slash Washed Media. And mash that subscribe button. We put every episode up there. Also, Bit Madness, fill out your brackets. There's a link on Patreon, Reddit, in the Discord, anywhere you can find it. We're going to start it a week from today. We didn't feel it was right to do it without Dylan here,

so we're going to delay. And he just didn't do his bracket. He just doesn't care. He went on vacation last Tuesday, really. Mentally, yeah. Oh, dude, I'm the worst about the pre-vacation zone out. You do have pre-problems.

I'm a pre-dad. Also, happy International Women's Day. Shout out to all the Will Mommies out there. Ladies. Randy's just... Hello, ladies. Valvinas. You baking a cake for him, Randy?

Randy says he already has. Randy's showing up to camp Will Mommy dressed like Kurt Russell and Chris Farley in the stripper skit. Okay. It was Patrick Swayze. Cool. Kurt Russell and Chris Farley in the stripper skit okay it was Patrick Swayze cool and they were at Johnny Rockets dude he was

I saw Patrick Swayze in a trailer for something the other day and I couldn't figure I couldn't remember his name all I could think of was Kurt Russell

rest in peace Patrick Swayze yeah I was gonna say what trailer it was an old one CGI yeah

hologram Swayze. It's produced by Orion Films. Dude, have you all seen, are you Roadhouse fans? More so the Texas version, but I've seen the movie. You like just spitting your peanuts on the floor? It's the only way I can keep those with allergens away from me. It's the only way. Will, was it you who had a friend who had a peanut allergy and walked into Texas Roadhouse?

No, it was me who had a friend who had a peanut allergy and walked into Texas Roadhouse? No, it was me who had a friend who had a peanut allergy who I brought to a restaurant where they give you free peanuts and everyone throws them on the ground. And it wasn't Roadhouse? It was not Roadhouse, no. It was called the Mitchell Street Pub in Petoskey, Michigan. And I will say. Oh, I know that place, yeah. Yeah, it's great. Oh, yeah, man.

Great. You went down to the UP and then. I'm sorry. Had some pasties. I don't know where. Were you in Canada before you went down to the UP? Yeah, man. Great. You went down to the UP and then – I'm sorry. I had some pasties. I don't know. Were you in Canada before you went down to the UP? Yeah, man. I'm very impressionable.

Also, Patreon schedule this week. Shout out to all the patrons out there. We got Bachelor tomorrow. Ooh, what do we have tonight? Is it a finale? No, there's two more weeks. I don't know. Are we getting After the Rose tonight?

No. Tonight? To be honest, I don't know. But we're recapping it all on Patreon tomorrow. Oh, Fantasy Suites. We'll get the F Suites. Okay. Okay.

Maybe they'll have an Airstream. An XL Airstream. Yeah. What are they going to do for the Fantasy Suites this time? Cabins, probably. I guarantee you're going to get some sort of, like, quarters that are out back and who knows why they were built. A Lincoln-esque cabin.

Built with Lincoln logs. That'd be tight. We also got R&B radio tomorrow, I think. I don't really know what their schedule's doing. Who knows? Don't care. Also, Friday voicemails. Get in, get out for $5 a month if you need to.

Go make it happen. We put some free previews of both Bachelor and Voicemails on the free feed last week. It was a very sneaky pre. A little taster? A little teaser. I love it. What's your favorite teaser? Probably Motts Sticks.

Really? I was not expecting that. I'm a Motts Sticks guy. Marinara? I've got a terrible opinion that mozzarella sticks and ranch, or not ranch, gravy go well together. You can shout out Chicken Express for this opinion because I will get the- White gravy? White gravy, correct. I don't have any issue dipping pretty much anything in gravy.

Yeah, that's- If it's in gravy, I'm eating it. I'm trying to feast. Do not make a baby gravy joke. Please do not make a baby gravy joke. I'm not. I'm just, I'm actually, I'm trying to feast. Do not make a baby gravy joke. Please do not make a baby gravy joke. I'm not. I'm actually, I'm trying, my mind is trying to like process the gravy with the mozzarella stick. I've never had it elsewhere.

It's just, it's a byproduct of ordering that as my side at Chicken Express. Putting the gravy on the mozzarella. I've probably asked this question on the podcast before, but KJ was definitely not on when I asked it. Definitely not. If you go into a party, whether it's a Super Bowl party, but it's at someone's house, and so it's like a potluck thing, and you see an appetizer on the table there, what do you know that you're going to go way too hard on? Oh, spinach artichokes probably a top tier. Other than that, I feel like I'm just taking all sorts of shots at breath this

morning but i'm chips and definitely not paste salsa guy for sure okay okay you know i'm gonna answer this question truthfully it's whatever has not been touched by everyone else that's that's the very day rough answer like whatever is just kind of getting overlooked and like maybe the lid's still on it like that's gonna be my thing i'm gonna getting overlooked and like maybe the lid's still on it. Like that's going to be my thing. I'm going to be first and I'm going to go all in on it. And then I'm going to just kind of look at the other stuff and be like, yeah, there's like one, there's one little Southwestern egg roll. It looks like it's at the bag. No one's touched that. Quick follow-up. How much do you trust the homemade stuff versus somebody who showed up with like store-bought cookies and sets them on the table? Like would you opt for with store-bought cookies and sets them on the table. Would you opt for the store-bought because you know what you're going to get?

Good question. I'll always err for the homemade cookie. Okay. It's just obviously they're different. Unless they went to like – what's the place in Austin that Tiny Boxwoods has the cookie bar or whatever? Yeah. Fantastic. I'll go on record.

Very niche. They have one in Houston too. Highly recommend. I'll go on record saying I think it's the best cookie I've ever had. I just love them. I haven't had them. They're incredible. We've got a very well-known cookie place in Harbor Springs, Michigan.

And I would have rode with them pretty much through anything until I had one of the cookies from Tiny Boxwoods, and now it's just my favorite cookie. I respect that. Sorry. Hey, Tom's mom, you're done. I hope. Are you canceling them?

No, I'm not going to cancel Tom's mom's. I still really like it. Tom's mom? But Tom's mom's cookies is what it's called. Ever heard of Rachel Ray? She did a little feature on it one time. Pretty big for the city as a whole. What's she up to?

Saying O-V-O-O all the time. Or what is it, Evo? Not E-O-V-O-O. E-V-O-O. She thinks that Or what is it? Evo? Not Evo. E-V-O-O. She thinks that new Drake slaps just as much as I do. She's running with the six. You catch that new Drake, Dave? I did.

First three tracks are heat. See, I didn't want you to talk about it. I wanted to wait three weeks for Dylan to bring it up. I know. I was surprised that he even listened to it when it came out on Friday. He was a little too early on it for my liking. He's a sneaky Drake guy. June's thug plug?

Yeah, it's going to be way over there. You guys heard this? It is Rick Ross, Ricky Rosé featuring Drake. That's my Dylan impression. That's good. Before we get into it, let's talk about Sun Basket real quick. Getting dinner on the table quickly does not have to mean sacrificing nutrition and quality. With Sun Basket. You can actually

have it all every single day. It's 2021. We don't have to worry about wearing pants for the short term, really. Right. Yeah. You don't have to commute and we'll be darned if you have to worry about eat healthy resolutions. Sun Basket wants you to have your healthiest year yet and they're making it easier than ever. Their fresh and ready meals are just $8.99

so they're good for you and your body and your budget. Dave, you love these things. I am a noted fan of this stuff. This has been huge for us leading up to the birth of our son and after. I mean, because, you know, you don't have all the time to cook, man. Sometimes the kid's freaking out over, you know, God knows what. You can't talk, so you don't know.

So, yeah, you need to fire up a sun basket. You can't talk, so you don't know. So, yeah, you need to fire up a sun basket. They've got the ones that you don't have to do anything. You just throw them in the oven or in the microwave. And they've got the ones that take a little bit more time but not a lot, just maybe one or two little things you've got to chop up and mix in. Fantastic. I think the first one you're talking about is their fresh and ready meals that come freshly prepared and ready to heat up in as little as six minutes.

Yeah. Yeah. Six minutes in dad time. I mean, that's just quick. That's nothing. That's a blank. I'm still pre-dad, but yeah. You're pre-dad.

You'll get it one day. KJ and I can relate. You know. Every Sun Basket meal is filled with only premium quality real food, including organic, fresh produce, antibiotic and hormone-free meats, and sustainably sourced seafood from supplies that they know and trust. Their chefs have won Michelin awards and even a James Beard award. That's big time.

Did you win the James Beard award? I should have. You should have. I should have. Dylan probably thinks a Michelin award is like about tires. Oh, is it truck month? Oh, dude, that's sick. I think I got Michelins on my car.

It is the same Michelin, though. Is it? It's very confusing. It's really, it's a little confusing. Well, one of them's for five chefs, and then the American version is just tires. Exactly. All you have to do for these is just heat and eat, which means no prep and no mess. Right now, Sun Basket's offering $35 off your order when you go right now to sunbasket.com

slash steam and enter promo code steam at checkout. sunbasket.com slash steam and enter promo code steam at checkout for $35 off your order. That's sunbasket.com slash steam. Enter promo code steam. Time to recap this weekend in fun, baby. I mean, Dylan usually starts us off

and since you're in the chair, I think we're throwing it to KJ first. Man, in good tradition, I'll say I did absolutely nothing. I loved every bit of it. But aside from that, Friday was pretty chill. I think I dropped into Verdansk into the night, probably on a low note. Who knows? Weekend drops are always hit or miss.

But Saturday is pretty much what my future weekends will entail until I reach the end of this journey. I'm going all in on the phases of dadhood. And right now I'm doing my DIY journey, trying to figure out how to use the old hammer and nail. Right now I'm building a – Are you stacking them bales? Hey, man, sometimes you're the hammer, sometimes you're the nail. That's what daddy always said.

Why do they need a hammer and a nail to stack bales? I't know i feel like that's just like muscle yeah yeah no but uh i'm trying to build a little partition wall in my garage so that i can create a little workshop for future uh building endeavors i've got a list of things that probably won't get done um but yeah that took about uh eight hours on Saturday, give or take collectively, which I realized when you've got a seven and a half month old or whatnot, uh, the other decision maker in the house, uh, doesn't love that. I'm just like, Hey, you got Saturday covered, right? I'll be in the garage and peace out. So that was Saturday, Saturday night. I'm scared of that time in my life. It'll happen.

Yeah. It'll happen. Saturday night. I did something, you know, many people are saying I wasn't going to do, but given that your boys had some recent bouts, it's given some antibodies. I stepped out for the first time, met a few backers in IRL. Solid time in Dallas. Let's go.

Solid time in Dallas. Great people. So Sunday was pretty chill a lot of recovery I did visit a place called Shields and this is hashtag not spawn but there's an outdoor sporting good company that's like from North Dakota called Shields if you've been to I don't know name the biggest store you can think of Nebraska Furniture Mart I don't know, name the biggest store you can think of, Nebraska Furniture Mart. I don't know, two Costco's stacked on top of each other. That's what Shields is. There's a Ferris wheel, an operating Ferris wheel in the center of it. Let's go to Shields.

Where is this? Up in the poorly named The Colony. Oh. Yeah. Little town Warren Buffett's just throwing tons of money at to build a bunch of shit up there. But that's a whole other level. Worst branding, the colony or white settlement? Dude, white settlement shocked me.

When I saw it on the map when we were moving Sally into Fort Worth, I was like, oh, let's go to the Lowe's over here. Let's go to the other Lowe's. Jesse. It ain't good. Jesse. Come to my settlement, Jesse. I will be back. I will be back for sure to shields.

Cause they, I can't even, I don't even know where to start everything from, uh, alive. Like you can buy a bowling ball, of course. Why not?

And then go test it out. Cause they've got bowling lines. I might golf simulator. I might have to be the guy that buys their own bowling ball. If I ever want to bowl again, cause you don't want to put your fingers in those random holes. That is correct. That's a commitment. That is a commitment. I will say i thought i saw dylan or better yet i

thought i heard dylan because they do have like an indoor batting cage and someone was just in there just beating the piss out of some balls in the batting cage so putting on a show you got to get to the game early man see the guys take bp. I mean, I'm very interested in this place. It's worth it. It's worth the trip. Also, man, I guess my invite to the backer meetup just got lost. Okay. Yeah.

I guess that's fine. Dude, the thing is, you totally would have made it there, too. Yeah. I mean. There would have been no blowback of you trying to go meet up with the 10 people. Yeah. Come to think of it, my permission slip was not exclusively signed for this event,

so I probably should be a little more low-key on how I present what I did. I was intending to go to a buddy's to watch the fights. Ended up with backer meet-ups, so yeah, a little mix-up in communication. But good point. Those things happen. It happens. Those things happen. I don't know what I did. I think I just hung out at home.

You just have the fuzzy I did I think I just hung out at home You just have the fuzzy brain? I think I dropped into Verdansk And I think it was one of those games Where I had to bail a calf way through Why is Verdansk hit or miss on weekends? No, it was just because the kid was Losing his shit Oh, I said that just because I feel like Competition steps up a notch

Oh, on the weekend? Friday night, Saturday night as opposed to us dropping like in a random tuesday evening i wasn't sure if it would be more popular on like a weeknight because people aren't going out and doing stuff or if it's if it's what what's the what's the deal i don't know could be all in my head who knows i have like i definitely have when i play fifa online i have things in my head that i make up where i'm like oh like if i play earlier in the day then i'm going to be playing like british people who are better if the day, then I'm going to be playing British people who are better. If I play at night, I'm going to be playing Americans

who are shittier at the game. But that probably makes no sense at all. It doesn't. I don't think your nationality has anything to do with how good you are at a video game. No. But I get it. Did you drink any bourbon with any Coke this weekend?

Oh, I had some bourbon last night. What you got me. Oh, yeah. The, what is it? Something Creek. I don't remember the name. Dylan. It's honestly a top three bourbon for me.

Dylan did the leg work when it came to choosing the bourbon. That's a first. I'm not a bourbon guy. More of a core guy himself. He's going to hate this pod. He's going to be bored at the pool later and be like you know what i'm gonna check it on the boys right now and then he's just gonna be we're gonna ruin his vacation don't don't flash your your well manicured uh six-pack on

on the gram if you don't want the squad to roast it mommies are going back and checking their screenshots of a story to see if the the proportions are off they're like texting wait can they see if i screenshot a story everyone wonders that every time they do it yeah at least if you're in your 30s yeah yeah um so uh yeah i didn't really do much i did i i i watched the All-Star game last night. Watched the fight Saturday. I watched the early prelims. The prelims. The thing about the prelim is it's prelim.

Well, I was actually going to mention something about the All-Star game that I didn't realize. It's that all the stars are there. All of them. All of the stars. Yeah, I hear more about that on today's Too Much Dip. Which will feature Will for a moment. I was going to say. Just sit in on the whole thing.

No, I don't know if I can. I don't know if I can. I didn't see much this weekend. It's fine. People just tune in for the banter. This weekend. Yeah. Well, so this weekend, I did what everyone loves to do over a weekend.

I got to move this weekend. Okay. I want to give a special shout out to my guys, Corey and Pablo. All right. They were our movers they went absolutely off they fit a couch through the stairwell that i didn't think was going to be able to go through that stairwell that's always the big question they they did have to do something that i could tell kind of killed them inside a little bit they walked over to me and they're like hey man is there any way you can spot us while we're bringing this couch up the stairs

i was like absolutely yeah i was wondering how much you tried to participate because there's always that even when you get movers and you're like i know i couldn't move this on my own you still don't you feel you know you don't want to be emasculated so you're like kind of like oh hey do you need any help and they're like no we're good and you're like oh so you're just kind of hovering because you don't want to be that guy uh this guy is absolutely that guy anytime that that situation occurs or let's say i say I'm selling something on Craigslist back in the day that somebody needs to come pick up, man, I'd help you. But some injury flared up right before this.

Yeah, I had to call you guys in. I'm hobbled. I really wish I could help you. So otherwise, I will be way too involved. I gave the offer numerous times, and they shut me down every single time until the couch came into the equation. And it was like, yeah, we're going to need you here. Did you offer them a beverage, a beer maybe? So they arrived at 8 o'clock in the morning.

So I did not offer them a beer. I did go to the gas station midway through, and I offered them, I was like, anything to drink, guys? Coffee, water, whatever. One of them asked for a Gatorade. And he did something that I haven't heard anyone do in years. He said, make sure there's a lot of sugar in it. Okay. I don't like that.

He's like, I don't like those zero products. And I was like, all right, let's ride. Let's go. He's looking for that glucose. Respect. You're sweating a lot. You got to replenish. Yeah.

It was a good move. Personally, I would have asked for a liquid IV, but that's just me. I had plenty on me. It was all packed up at that point, though. So it was probably a good move. I would, personally, I would have asked for a liquid IV, but that's just me. I had plenty on me. It was all packed up at that point, though, so it was probably a good thing. I realized the other day that we're going to have to dismantle our crib before we move it. Yeah. So you're not moving into a new house? You're just going to take your current house apart?

Yes. Cool. Dude, I did something big yesterday, too. Can you imagine just brick by brick? Yep. Yeah, we're tearing down the drywall today. Yep. Yeah, put it in the pile over there in the backyard.

When we put it back together, it's going to look nice. That's why I keep mine on wheels. Dude, that's terrible. So, yeah, yesterday I added something to the resume yesterday. Mounted a TV. Okay. Yeah, I'm a TV TV guy now. I'll admit didn't go well. Had to call in reinforcements. Had to call my brother-in-law drew over. Oh

no, no. Like called them in physically to come assist because of the size of the TV or because of the job you had done. The situation at hand was not very conducive to uh to me figuring it out and by me i mean someone with no knowledge of tools okay and so yeah uh the what we were what we were putting it on is a tile fireplace that already had holes drilled into it and so our main issue was like okay which of these holes can we use which can we not use the the depth of which we had to work with behind the actual surface, not great. Okay. Not great. And so we had to get different lengths.

It was just a nightmare. Okay. Luckily, we went to Ace Hardware, and I was introduced to someone who referred to himself as the Screw Man. Probably a seven-year-old man. Screw Man. Screw Man. He was like, yeah, they call me the Screw Man. And then we were like, oh, yeah, everybody or just the people at the store? And he's like, no, it's not a double entendre. Okay. Screwman. He was like, yeah, they call me the Screwman. And then we were like, oh, yeah, everybody or just people at the store?

And he's like, no, it's not a double entendre. Okay. All right. Screwman. I was like, dude, chill out, Screwman. But he set us up real nice. So, yeah, it took us a little bit of time. Had it been just on drywall, I could have done it by myself, no questions asked.

But because we had to do it on this it took about three hours it was it was that's not terrible no it could have been worse it could have been worse it wasn't it wasn't a diy project in my in my garage but overall yeah what um what percentage are you feeling like good about it like like like if it falls off like is it yeah how how how yeah how comfortable are you with what's going on right there now? I'd say there's a 20% chance that this TV falls off the wall at some point. Not soon. Not soon necessarily.

It's one to five. But I think that by the end of our lease, I'm just worried it's going to fly off the wall. Maybe not because of the mounting, but maybe the tile that's on there, that might just come off the wall. The tile makes me nervous, but you're probably fine. Yeah. I will say that what will happen? tile that's on there, that might just come off the wall. The tile makes me nervous, but you're probably fine. Yeah. I will say that what will happen, it'll start slanting or sloping. Like, it's not just going to up and fall off.

Luckily for me, I was really excited to turn the TV on and see something for the first time on it and, like, our new place and feel really good about it. And I was like, ooh, I'm going to catch the end of this Arnie Palmy right now. Yeah, it was already over. Long gone. I did have two Pacificos throughout the process, though. Drinking beer while mounting a TV just feels good. Yeah. Feels different.

What is your cable provider situation, and what is the internet situation? Because I know that was controversial. You know what, Dave? I'm glad you asked. Our internet is, we are no longer AT&T people. And based on the location of our new place. Yeah, it's a great thing. And based on the location of our new place, what we found out very soon was that high-speed internet doesn't really go down there.

Oh. And so we're on spectrum right now, on their highest plan. We are not doing their cable because I can confirm that we are cord cutting. Hit it. Let's go. There we go. This cord's been cut. welcome to the club so i i announced long ago on this podcast that i was cutting the cord and going with youtube tv and after my two-week trial was up and we decided to cancel our at&t service they they

quickly let us know that that was not going to happen under any circumstances And so it was a very, very welcome move in that we got to finally go over to YouTube TV. Yeah, welcome. Shots to the interface. I'm pretty satisfied. There's a little bit of the user interface that I'm not crazy about. I'm still using the Samsung, like my TV remote,

and it takes a little bit. It's a little bit slow. But the fact that I can go, I can be doing something in the nursery with the baby and pull up whatever I was just watching on my phone or my laptop or the tab. Very friendly. Watching on the iPad is a game changer. Absolutely. Oh, I'm watching a soccer game and I have to go to the bathroom real quick?

Yeah, I'm going to finish out the half sitting down there and watching on my iPad. When I was prepping for my colonoscopy, I pretty much watched the entirety of the Cowboys-Rams game Sunday night on my phone. Evacuation. No missing. I mean, there was some missing, Will. My number one benefit to that entire process is the fact that you didn't have to call and wait on someone to install. You never have to call and troubleshoot through some company.

Let's say like, you know, losing regional sports networks did suck. But if ever I wanted to be like, you know what? I just don't need cable this month. Or we're switching providers. Like, I'm done in 20 seconds. cable this month or we're switching providers like i'm done in 20 seconds like i don't care if the cost is the exact same but i'm completely done with having to like jump through hoops to get small things done it's wonderful so you know you know you can also share the account with six different emails yes so we're paying about 20 bucks a month for youtube tv major shouts my

family plan has uh been spread quite then. Yeah, we decided early on to do that. Very happy with that choice. They did increase. There was a change where you could spread it with like, there were only three screens at a time, and that included the entire family. So like national championship games, Super Bowl, it would become an issue. But I believe they were increasing the price and changing that to where you could have like unlimited screens going. So you'll be good.

Let's go. None of the above. Fuck it. Cut the cord. Wow. Do you think that's what, do you think that's what Zach Daler Rocco was thinking about the entire time you wrote Gorilla Radio?

No. It's about the option of voting for Al Gore or the son of a drug Lord, George, George Bush. His word's not mine. But if you look into it, just... That's all. I was kind of bummed that the Battle of Mexico City

was not actually like a fight. I thought it was going to be like Fight Island or something, and it turned out just to be like an album. You wanted to see Zack versus Tom? I wouldn't want to fight Zack. He's a scrappy little fucker. I'm fairly sure he did a celebrity death match, right?

He had to. And maybe they fought each other on it. But if you tried to fight Zach DeLaRocca, if you tried to grab his hair, it's just not going to work. He's going to go crazy on you. I love him so much. Next thing you know, there's a flag on fire.

You're like, what the hell? He might just stab you with a flag. Tom's over there playing his guitar, making weird sounds. I went to Harvard. Oh, he could probably make a sound with his guitar that would end up, it would paralyze your brain. Yeah. You'd be like, oh my God, what do I do? Doodly-doot.

I don't know if that's what it would sound like. He's just mashing on the pedals. All rightouts to rage that's all i did season three episode 11 confirmed who did he fight yeah that's a fred durst without having to watch the whole video so i'll get back to you on that cool perfect did you you know that show got old quick celebrity death 100 one first season was like cool then the novelty wore off and you're like yeah oh they fought the machine what the hell am i thinking oh okay tom and zach de la roca fought kind of genius robot oh man what else that's it what a weekend boy cooled out last night. I did dip into Stanley Tucci's show after a million people recommended it to me. How was it? Because I

have my own show niche in that show in that same niche that I want to bring up to. Glad you mentioned that. It's a great show. But if I could enter the steam room real quick, I would like to do that. There's no reason you shouldn't have that steam on that board.

You want me to just do it? Oh, here you go. David, get over here. No, not you too. Stay over there, David. I'm good. Okay, thank you. I like to watch.

It's a great show, but the only way you can watch it is on CNN. And while I don't really have any beef with CNN, the constant CNN branding on the show takes away from the relaxing aspects of it. Like you have these beautiful scapes of like Italy, these vineyards. You have like, you know, old women making pizza. Like it's just this very calming, peaceful show. But in the corner, you just have this giant red CNN logo. And that's fine. You can get over it eventually. Until you get to the commercials, of which there are many.

And if you're watching the commercials on demand or on YouTube TV, all the commercials are for Stanley Tucci's fucking show. And I'm like, yeah, I'm watching it right now. You don't need to tell me to watch it more. Like I'm watching it right now. And I just, I don't, I don't understand. It's just really annoying. I know it's all automated.

I can't pull over anymore. Yeah, I've got similar feelings about scrolling through like the netflix catalog and seeing their netflix logo on 90 of the shows i'm like okay hey you guys put out great work but like let me pick some without knowing it's a netflix original on 90 of your catalog the show i was going to mention i didn't realize this had come out in the summer like mid-quar um selena and the chef it's on hbo max i've watched a couple episodes of that having not really known much about selena gomez outside of music and grand prairie zone yeah grand prairie i knew that part home of the gophers she sang closer executed it well

uh don't know if you've heard the tune which which closer uh the vaccine of your rover yeah that one and the cover oh okay there you go because i would be i would listen to that one it's basically her in her own kitchen a couple of her friends at her house who quarantined with her but then she will get on like super hd zoom with a few different chefs she had anastasia who was uh i can't i never remember her last name but she was on a bachelor from last season right she came in as a watch mccalt's like friend from home consultant instead of family showing up for the uh uh for tasha season ben oh he had like some yeah he had some like yeah i remember that now so she showed she was doing an episode

and selena comes off really really personable and likable in this show. I enjoyed it. Yeah, I agree, actually. Yeah, she is very likable in this show. I never didn't like her, but the show, I was like, oh, she's kind of cool. I could hang out with her. She can't open difficult jars, and then she immediately goes back. I have lupus.

She says this like four times in the show, so it stands out. She's like, oh, jar of pickles. Sorry, I can'tupus. She says this like four times in the show. So it stands out. She's like, oh, jar of pickles. Sorry, I can't open it. And one guy tried to make a snide joke about it. And she was like, yeah, I have lupus. Oh, jeez. Shout out to lupus awareness. There's nothing better than just opening a jar.

Like a jar of pickles, that pop is so, oh. That's how you know it's fresh and sealed when it pops if it doesn't pop i'll take you might want to stop i'll take the jar over the biscuit opening process we still have not improved that oh what is why is it yeah or no um if all my sardine people or no this one the canned sardines for your dog sardy boys for your for your pup and you got to peel the thing back but like it'll cut you if you're like and you and you can't reseal it so you're like you're trying to not spill the sardine juice because it's going to stink it's going to make your hand stink chef boyardee had that similar uh approach and some of theirs old school yeah for some reason

you can microwave these but they're metal it doesn't see yeah that probably killed millions never sat well. Let's hear from our friends over at Public Rec. Ever heard of them? Think about the joggers we wear that aren't Public Rec. These are kind of joggers that you can't really wear out because you look like you're just wearing a pair of sweatpants. With Public Rec, you don't even have to worry about that. These things are just good-looking pants that fit like sweatpants.

They've got the comfortableness. They're very comfortable is what I'm trying to say. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The fit, the style, they've got pockets with zippers and no zippers, but these things are just great. The length can't be too long or too short on the old ones, like on these other sweatpants. You never know what you're dealing with.

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I was like, Let me blow your mind. Okay. Okay. And I was like, These are sweatpants. She had no clue what hit her. Jeez. You did her like that. I did.

What? They do look good on you. I was trying to. Yeah. I did. What? Hmm? I can't tie that to spiderwebs. I was trying to. Yeah. So I just didn't speak. Just leave a message and I'll call you back. These are great for lounging at home, looking sharp at work, heading to the bar, everywhere in between.

Dylan's not here, but I know that Dylan did wear these to a party once. Okay. Dylan parties. And no one knew except for Dylan. Are we sure Dylan parties? I don't know if he parties wear these to a party once. Okay. Dylan parties. And no one knew except for Dylan. Are we sure Dylan parties? I don't know if he parties. That's a good question. Like we said, the all-day, every-day pant comes in waist and inseam sizing,

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Can we talk about the main event? What everyone's been talking about? The Bath and Body Works fight. Oh, shit. This is bananas. Bed, the Bath and Body Works fight. Oh, shit. This is bananas. Bed, Bath, and Beyond Body Works. I'm still doing Gwen Stefani bits over here. That's fine.

Leave me be. That's fine. You a big Blake Shelton guy, too? Okay, now we're done. He's so talented, though. He's a really cool guy. He had two internships. He got where he deserved to be.

When I saw there was a BBW fight, I thought there was something else that was about to happen. Who's mobbing at Bath & Body Works this bad? This happened like two days ago. Do we know what state or city we can put this on the ledger for? I'll look that up if we don't. Imagine you're just out. Florida is the guess. Second guess would be like a houston suburb yeah i'm gonna go with an ohio fight but i'm i'll get the answer here based on the wardrobe of one of the the

young ladies in the fight it seemed warm outside oh surprise winner scottsdale oh that makes sense okay that that stand your ground it's a stand your ground state imagine you're just out in Oh, surprise winner, Scottsdale. Oh, that makes sense. Okay. That checks out. It's a stand your ground state. Imagine you're just out in Scottsdale, beautiful Scottsdale. It's probably like 61 degrees and sunny. It's probably like 9 a.m., right? The store just opened. And you're out there just trying to cultivate a look that feels modern and tropical.

And then you just see this mollywop go down. What do you do? Bust you in the head with body butter? this mollywop go down like what do you do bust you in the head with body butter you're just there trying to like you've got like like 20 coupons like in your email that you've never used for like 20 off and you're just trying to get something like a a pillow or like you know like uh anything does this got every lavender and mint or just the lavender sets that's the great question you're just out there trying to strike a balance between traditional and contemporary.

Yeah. Next thing you know, you're in a fight for your life with the entire staff. Yeah, you're pinned to the ground by the manager of Bath and Body Works. I was bummed to see this wasn't over a mask, but it was mask-ish in that apparently someone was standing too close to this young lady. Real close.

And she didn't like it. I guess she was just there, you know, trying to find, like, go-with-everything pieces that won't break the bank. Do we have the video of this? Are we doing the video here? I think we should just toss it up without audio. I've only watched it 48 times. I just don't. I can't. I'm one of these people that when I'm in the grocery store at this point,

I've gotten to the point where I don't really like it if people are standing too close to me. Yeah. But at no point have I gotten so riled up that I decided to start throwing hands. No, I think she was crowding the other girl's space. Yes. And let me say this. It's clearly marked on the floor where you're supposed to stand. Oh, I mean, if you're in an establishment these days, you know where you're supposed to stand.

I definitely want to commend the videographer here. They certainly could have gone landscape with the phone. But their distance and framing throughout this entire process is pretty electric. You get the entire context of what's going on from the point they start, at least. The follow-up comments are always hit or miss if you get more story from the person that posted it. But she did say the woman who seems to be the troublemaker in the striped dress, But she did say the woman who seems to be the troublemaker in the striped dress and apparently shoved multiple people before the fight broke out. As someone who worked in retail for all of high school and all of college,

shout out to Whole Foods, this wouldn't have gone down in my establishment. Someone would get in linebacker Terry Tated if you start throwing hands in the bulk aisle. You would have just pulled them off by the back of their shirt and been like, no, it's like a toddler. You're out of here. You're done. The real MVP. I want to give a special shout-out to the girl in the jeans

and Allbird-looking sneakers who really got in the nitty-gritty of it. She was in the bottom of the dog pile there. It's like a rugby scrum. She got after it. Who's your real MVP? It's the guy because this dude this dude he gets them out of the store he doesn't give in they're yelling where my purse i gotta give him a purse terry and uh he's just like not having it and he is he is forcefully shoving her

out of the store which a lot of people are scared to put their you know this yeah could end and poorly for him he could lose his job if corporate doesn't like how he handled this. And he's just, I think he handled the situation pretty well. He handled it better than me because I think my natural reaction, if I was trying to get the woman in the striped dress who really wants her purse, like first of all, ma'am, you're going to get your purse. Like they're not just going to steal your purse. It's Bath and Body Works. You're going to get your purse eventually. But I don't know if I would have had a better move than just bear hugging her and trying to carry her out myself and that would have gotten me fired from bbw i will want i do want to give out the intern klein

escape and survive award to the young woman who pulls up the partition here in the background she kept her distance from everyone guarded the the registers, made sure that the rest of the squad was in good position. And she got back by the cashier stand and was like, Hey, I hope this turns out well for the rest of my teammates, but, uh, I'm still clocked in. Uh, my shift ends in 10. So I'm gonna stand here on camera. She's going to catch a most wanted contract.

I'll get everybody back afterwards. She, she had the, she had the argument like, no, I'm going to go watch the register. I don't want someone coming back here and doing anything reckless. That's smart. Exactly. I mean, no one's actually going to do that, but that's the excuse if you don't want to get dirty here. You know, I kind of feel for these people because, like, imagine you're just there trying to illuminate your space with lamps that stand out from $15. And then the next thing you know, you lose your purse.

You're getting thrown down. You're having two ladies tackle you. You then the next thing you know, you lose your purse. You're getting thrown down. You're having two ladies tackle you. You got the dude walking over. Everybody kept their mask on except for the purse lady. Good for them. Dude, they're just trying to go to Bath and Body Works, and instead they're just getting their body worked. She did kind of get worked.

Although it was two-on-one for a minute there. It wasn't necessarily fair. There was a surprise appearance from what I would like to deem a juggalo. Not by size, but because of outfit style. Nobody in Scottsdale should be rocking a black crop top and black Daisy Dukes and black boots, basically. Jumping into fights in the middle of the mall. The other lady was dressed like Beetlejuice. We're really lucky we did not see any um

any spill out yeah that that's the most surprising thing especially with the woman you just referenced what just happened i thought so i just do this you said spill out and all of a sudden your laptop flipped on its back i was like oh what just happened under the table here steven tyler doing like the mic thing somehow bringing it back. Caught it with your foot. Yeah, that is a hallmark of these videos when you see them, these fights bust out

in restaurants or in retail establishments and we've had a lot over the last few years. A random T showing up is almost to be expected, but it's also what keeps things from going as viral

as they could a lot of times and I think that's what helps this video, you know, stay going. And no product really was knocked on the floor yeah that that is a shocker oh yeah and you know that one of those one of those stands with a bunch of like i don't know i don't even know what sense they have like papaya and passion fruit like if body wash it's if one of those stands goes down it's knocking over every other stand there absolutely it's gonna be ugly uh and they're lucky she didn't get her hands on like a brita water filter or something like to just you know

start swinging around it's over a ninja i was in a gas station the other day and i saw an altercation start breaking out it was ugly a woman was turning in her lottery ticket okay and she she was he the gentleman at the counter who i am actually pretty close with based on how often I go to this gas station. He scanned it and he gave her $25. And she was not happy with that because she was positive she won $50. Oh, okay. So she started accusing him of stealing her money. And he was like, I'm scanning this.

What do you want me to do? So she started yelling, like literally yelling in the middle of the store, where's my fucking money? Where's my purse? Give me my fucking money. And I was just like, oh my God, this is so uncomfortable. I don't know what to do. I never at one point thought like I'm busting out the phone. I'm going to escalate the situation from afar.

You strike me as a bust out the phone and look down at it. A hundred percent. And like send a text. I looked over at this other guy and I gave him one of these looks that just goes like, whoa. Whoa, whoa. I need a Waze app app but for like altercations like this like you can just tap on your phone like shit going down right now inside of you i don't know spencer's yeah back by the black lights back where there's like a study hard

poster it's the chick in the school girl skirt the uh periodic table of sex positions oh there is some stupid shit at Spencer's. There was some stupid shit from Spencer's that was on my dorm wall. Dude, a Belushi, dude. It says college on his sweatshirt. Sick. Damn.

Yeah, man. The male version of Breakfast at Tiffany's. You'd love it. Is there an establishment that you can see yourself getting into this type of altercation?

Not necessarily a situation, but what environment is most likely to lead you to this outcome? This is a hard question. Don't all say summer moon while waiting on your order, because I feel like that's up there for me or any coffee store where it gets a little over zealous with how many people are in there. Wheatsville, the grocery store closest to my old apartment, Dave. Where they don't acknowledge me?

Where they don't really, yeah. They profile me? I ordered a sandwich there the other day at noon. I was quite hungry. Okay. It said it was going to be ready at 1218. As I stood there at the sandwich stand at 1248, my sandwich was still not ready. Dude, this happened to me.

I thought it was just me because I was wearing golf clothes. I thought they were doing a Wilmonds bit on me because when I went up to inquire about my sandwich for the third time, and I was very nice about it because these people look beaten down behind there. They need more people making sandwiches back there. It's just a manpower thing. Well, you know it's a coop. Or a woman power.

It's a coop, yeah. It's a good coop. Why do they put the dash between the O and the I? I don't get it. Coop. And so I went up's a coop, yeah. It's a good coop. Why do they put the dash between the O and the O? I don't get it. It's weird. Coop. And so I went up finally and said something the third time. And I was like, hey, did my order just not come through or something?

And they literally said to me, they were like, there's a handwritten note on here that says you changed your order from 1220 to 420. And I was like. Wait a minute. I was like, are you, is this a bit? Like, what's going on? Like, this isn't Wilmont's? And I didn't know what to say to them, and I had nothing else to say, but I don't know how I could have possibly done that.

And then the guy looked at me, and he was like, I am so sorry. And then they immediately made my BLT. Major shouts to you for once you moved away from that neighborhood, being very willing to throw the name of the company on there. Because before it was only co-op. Now they're out. I knew who it was. Have they lost my business?

Certainly not because I really enjoy their sandwiches. So I will keep going there even if it takes an hour. My go-to butcher has implemented the ticket system. And you can't just walk up and start talking to the butcher. You walk up and you get your ticket. And they have a sign that says it, and I follow the rules. I abide by it. I get my ticket, and I stand there, and I wait.

And there's a number of people who don't, and they try to go up there and just walk right up. And these guys, I'll just say it. It's a central market. They will straight-up ignore you. They won't tell. And that kind of – I'm like, why don't you just tell them? They won't be like, ticket system system and these people are like i need some

fillets i need two prime fillets and like they're just not getting it and then they get mad and they look over and they're like is there a line be like yeah there's a ticket system yeah and like they're not happy nobody wants to wait for meat i hate waiting for me it's the worst when i want meat I want it now. I want that cod. Okay. What are you making with the cod? Are you getting some tacos off?

I don't know. You can blacken some cod and make some real good tacos out of that. You don't think I'll do it? Thick cod. I didn't say that. I want your pre-made shish kebabs. Pre-seasoned. I'm a fan.

I love a good kebab. I do too, and I don't want to make them ever on my own because it's too much chopping and too much dealing with it. I'd rather have them do it. That's kind of the go-to post-grad. I'm having friends over at a place where I've got a good grill move is that you grab some kebabs. It's like, oh, this is going to go great.

I'm not going to say I'm anti-kebab, but I'm on the side of the fence of like, all right, now I've got to de-kebab all this shit on my plate. I've just got kind of like a deconstructed fajita. Well, you never know when you get to the point where the meat or vegetables aren't just falling off. You get to the point where you're like, all right, I'm going to wedge the fork into the middle of it and then scrape down. And you never know if you're going to make your plate fly off the table into someone's lap. You know what a lot of people do is the hot dog bun kebab squeeze it oh i don't dylan probably does dylan definitely does dylan's kebab is just a it's just a skewered hot it's just

four hot dogs on a skewer stick yeah uncooked jeez what yeah dylan's always like that he's like you don't have to cook hot dogs oh i thought you said he stays a quarter cooked at all times just in case stays a quarter something yeah jeez anyway we're i i'm trying to think i was at uh home depot for a minute and that's like the last place i would ever do it with somebody first of all it's very spread out everybody seems to be very friendly everybody's there just because like they're obviously like they're they got something they're working on they're focused it seemed and everybody's like they're not jovial but like everybody's kind of got this understanding it's like yeah man i'm doing some shit today it's where doers go to get shit done though. Yeah. So it makes sense. Didn't you go to Home Depot?

I went to Home Depot the other day, yeah. Yep. I had all my clothes packed away so I couldn't put on my every man's outfit a la John Duda but I feel like

I got some respect there. Okay. I was wearing a Masters shirt which I think plays in Austin more than it plays in like Northern Michigan. Probably. It was just a t-shirt. Dude, you can wear whatever you want to a home goods store like ace or home depot like there's an understanding it's like dude i yeah i just mowed the lawn and i just

replanted some stuff fixed a pipe i stink i just make sure my face is beaten down like i've been working i've been grinding didn't even wipe the dirt off my face like you don't want to be like first few weeks at a job micah and walk in there yeah like you can't do that and if you do you've got to roll the shit out of your embroidered sleeves like up to the elbow and like know that hey you're ready to now get your hands dirty and do a job i did unlock what i feel like is the biggest achievement thus far of my diy journey is walking into home Depot on Saturday. Older woman, probably 50th or so, kind of, you know, made sure she had my attention. She's like, excuse me, what's up? As I'm walking in, she's like, you don't do any contracting work, do you?

Or do you? And I damn near jumped and clicked my heels as I was waltzing into Home Depot. Yes, let's go. Hit it. she didn't see me then loading like lumber into my vehicle which does not scream contracting work whatsoever um but you're putting on foreman vibes had to look i didn't know you're that 70s show guy oh yeah yeah talk about jeff bez real quick, or his ex-wife? The Bays? Wow. Put some respect on McKenzie's name.

Baysed and confused. Dude, his ex-wife is marrying a science teacher. Okay. What a glow-up from this guy. What kind of science teacher? Like high school? He's not like a professor right this dude's just like no it's it's a school teacher i don't have the grade level um we need

his linkedin dan jewett is the gentleman's name do you have a copy of his uh syllabus uh i don't but i do have the book list um for next semester so now dan jew, there's no man that wouldn't be out kicking his coverage by marrying McKenzie Scott, you know, incredibly philanthropic and hardworking woman. Shout out to international women's day, major shots, you know,

as a man who respects strong, powerful women who then can allow me to do absolutely nothing and not feel good about that, about it. Buy me a PS4. All good. I'm in, I have no shame. can allow me to do absolutely nothing and not feel good about bad about it buy me a ps4 all good i'm in i have no shame uh danjo is definitely leveling up here like do you immediately become like next in line for assets like i'd sign a prenup no question but i would also sign like a

a writer being like i will never carry a wallet no, I will wear a shirt that says McKenzie Scott's husband 24-7. I'll get a face tattoo. The rest is my black card by standing by you. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Literally. I wonder if she's diversified into crypto. You have to wonder.

You got to hedge your husband's fortune with, like, some Ethereum. If you're this guy, like, I'm sure it's found in terms of where they met but i don't care about the truth here like how do these paths cross and what shot are you shooting if you're him is she on bumble match.com probably or farmers only gotta be a raya raya girl right is that the is that the one that dylan couldn't get into which Which one? I think it's Raya. Raya. Dylan's just, yeah. Raya. Rava. I don't know.

Modern day eatery across the street. I don't know. Hey, so it is a private school. Okay. It's for grades five to 12. And the tuition is very reasonable. It's $38,000 a year. All right.

You know, with merits and and whatnot that doesn't seem reasonable it's not it's quite expensive it's a brand new jeep that's smu's annual you know price tag basically yeah i don't think i'm gonna go to that school no well yeah so he's he's already graduating right uh no this might this might empower him this might let him like go off the books and do some alternative science stuff just Just see what he can get away with. Like, I don't need this. If they bring him in for a performance review, he's like, you know what? Is he trying to get fired to get a severance?

Yeah. I think probably. If he stayed on desk screaming out, Captain, my captain, after this, for sure, right? Okay. That's going to hit in 2% of our listening audience. Dude, it hit with me. I'm a big fan of the Dead Poets Society. DPS, sign me up.

I was more of a dead presidents guy. There we go. I had a really bad tweet one time about Dead Poets Society. Let's hear it. It was a Sunday Scaries tweet. I had never seen the movie before. I did a tweet and I recorded a scene before i knew how the scene ended oh and i was like oh man this is very scary's ask and then i i recorded it and tweeted

it before the scene had uh really finished and i was like oh i gotta delete that tweet luckily i only had about 20 followers at that point in my life so it wasn't a big deal this was this was probably eight years ago so i feel good about it now or i don I feel good about it now. Or I don't feel good about it now. Which scene was it? The scene where he takes his own life. Okay. He's not happy. That's a great movie. Very good.

Dylan noted Robin Williams' hater. Unbelievable. Wow. He doesn't believe laughter is medicine. I don't respect that. Has he never seen Mrs. Doubtfire? It is a critical movie for any 80s, 90s kid. Devo.

I guess I should say a product of the Devo decade. Or kids who had divorced parents in the 90s. I thought you meant like Whip It. That too. Correct, man. Whip. So this dude said he's joining his wife's commitment to pass on an enormous financial wealth to serve others. I'm not following up Devo. Dude, they're underrated.

Imagine marrying – like did she have a bunch of money before she married Jeff Bezos? It's hard to say. I don't know. Imagine if you just married someone and it's like, all right, now we have to give away all this money. Not many people are confronted with that like on day one of marriage it's like all right so what are we doing today we're we're going to give away generational wealth i'm in sounds like a fun little way to do it give me that job like your life just turns into shark tank from that point on but for non-profits 53 billion dollars on mackenzie scott it would be

great if he um this guy guy just pivoted from teaching science to just class warfare, like talking about this, we need to tax the billionaires, just going after them. I believe that is Mackenzie's mindset. She's very vocally set. She's going to give it all away by the time she's gone. Is that like how Elon Musk said he's a minimalist now, and now he just lives in a $12 million home in Austin?

It's like, oh, okay. Yeah. okay yeah oh man you didn't so minimal yeah you're you're not living in like an apartment on brody you can't be a minimalist and trying to go to mars at the same time like a minimalist like keeps themselves and like you know doesn't really enjoy doing i don't know i love i love it when when when people are like yeah i'm giving it all away. You know, none of this goes to my kids. You're like, eh, some of it probably. He's literally doing the most. Yes. Yeah. Being the Norwegian furniture now, I'm a minimalist.

Minimalist. It's a CBS show. The minimalist. The minimalist. I'm so tired of watching The Good Doctor for 10 minutes after The Bachelor's over. Is Good – are they back in season? so tired of watching the good doctor for 10 minutes after the bachelor's over it's good are they back in season i don't know if it is but like i just it's it's it's the perfect show to be on for a few minutes as sally and i scroll our phones and like look at bachelor takes online

real quick and then for me to get interrupted scrolling my timeline for sally to be like oh my god that's not how you you would never do this in the operating room are you kidding me okay like okay all i know is that dude's a motherfucking toilet seat huh every time i tune into that show the dude's just just pounding out some some chick oh the good whatever good doctor you think about the res i should see i shouldn't even act like i know how many different shows are on isn't he the good doctor The good doctor is the one with Asperger's or. Correct. Or.

Is Asperger's. I don't know. You watch it. I think he's on the spectrum. There we go. Well, all I know is. I'm sorry. The dude just constantly getting laid.

That is. I have the screenshots of that promo. This guy just can't stop. The Willie Aronte promo. And it's like an overhead shot of him and a woman in bed, like laying on their backs fully clothed. It's them two and then a huge block lettering shot of next week. Will he or will they or won't they? The answer is will they will.

And then it's like her sitting on the edge of the bed. And I'm like, okay, we're really just propping up. They're going to bang. Like, cut scene. They call him the good dickter. I was not expecting that. I mean, it's pretty much what they do for Fantasy Suite, so who am I to shame them if it's scripted TV?

Do we get Fantasy Suites tonight? That's what we get tonight. Sweet. Sweet. Clowns. Clowns. We have a new sponsor alert. Anyone want to do the Dylan new sponsor alert thing,

or should we just make something else up? New sponsor alert. That's good. That's good. This new sponsor is a very welcome sponsor for your boy. I don't know if you guys know this about me, but you ever heard of the phrase green thumb? Oh, yeah. Yeah, I don't have one of those.

I have two thumbs. You do. They don't do much. This guy. They give a thumbs up to Bloomscape, though. Shout out Yang Gang. Sorry. He's a big thumbs up guy.

Oh, cool. I like a good thumbs up. I don't have a green thumb, which means that I kill plants at a rapid pace. And if anything, I've needed a company like this for so long because I want plants in my place. It livens it up. You know, it cleans the air. They look good. They make you feel good.

Get you in touch with the earth. Well, some of us need a hand in this case. And that's why I love Bloomscape. They make it easy to find the perfect plants for your space and keep them growing all year long. Mine just came in the mail the other day. They deliver healthy plants right to your door, plus all the grow how you need to help them survive, thrive, do everything. That's my problem. I don't think I have a green thumb. We had an early on in quarantine bit where we like did a lot of, we planted some stuff. Well, it turns out when it's negative seven, a lot of that stuff doesn't

last. Yeah. And even before that, like I wasn't real sure, like which ones do I water? How much do they need? It gives you all the tools you need. They have several different options for you. So if you have like a ton of natural light in your place, or if you have direct sunlight, everything like that, or if you hardly any you can you can find a plant that you need thousands of people have already upgraded their spaces with their beautiful indoor plants from bloomscape you know you guys know what i got which one did you get i got the chef flera arbicola okay you guys wear this thing no it's an it's's in the extra large category of bloomscape plants. Love it. It's described as a fun and easy house plant with dramatic umbrella-shaped leaf formations

and a braided trunk. Okay. I've seen that. Those are pretty badass. Pretty sick. I need to step up my indoor plant. You know which one I got? And it's sitting in a box right there, and I have not unboxed it.

The ZZ plant. Color? Indigo. Oh. What's that top look like? Hard to say. Cool. It looked tight in the photo.

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And I have to say, incredible packaging from these guys. Incredible. Can I add that I've lived in my house now going on four years, and it has been a never-ending cycle of buy something, it dies, go back to one of the most intimidating environments, you know, a greenhouse that's just littered with things and you don't know what the hell to do. You're asking more questions, getting no answers, getting nowhere with this. And Bloomscape eliminated all of that guesswork. They tell you what you need for your area with a lot of sun or not. All in.

It's great. It's great. Their bloom kits are completely customizable. You can mix and match sizes and colors. And since no two plants are alike, Bloomscape makes it easy to filter plants by how much lighter attention they'll need. It comes with a mix of annual plants suited for your environment, complementary colors, and needs, so everything grows in harmony. The Grow How team is always available to answer any of your plant care questions. Get 15% off of plant orders of $100 with promo code STEAM at bloomscape.com.

That's 15% off plant orders of $100 or more at bloomscape.com. Promo code STEAM. Before you get into Brett's breaking news, can he just recap his weekend while I pee? I'm really sorry. Brett, what'd you do this weekend, my guy? Well, whoa, I can hear myself. Now that that's out of the way. We had a nice little weekend in Austin, Texas.

Okay. Had my favorite hush puppy I've ever had in my life, just a TLC. All right, no disrespect to Captain Dees. That one's over my head. Is that a Texas only thing? You won't know. I don't know what it is. I'll say this, though.

Hush puppies for me are kind of overrated. All right. Me too, until I had this one. Yeah. It was a- A good one will knock your socks off. Yeah. It was cheddar and sausage hush puppy. Oh, shit.

Okay. Now we're talking. Yeah. Now we're talking. This ain't your grandma's. No, no, no. It was phenomenal. Sorry.

No disrespect to your grandma's hush puppies. I'm sure they're great. I've never're talking. Yeah. Now we're talking. Let's hit your grandma's. No, no, no. It was phenomenal. Sorry, no disrespect to your grandma's hush puppies. I'm sure they're great. I've never had them. Did a little Matt's Hill Rancho this weekend. Very jealous of that. Dylan's plans to go to Matt's Hill Rancho on Saturday completely fell through. It was very funny how that group text unfolded. Dylan texted us with like a, hey, we doing Matt's?

And I was down. And then Will hit him with like a, maybe, but I have and i was down um and then we'll hit him with like a maybe but i have to be moving all day yeah i was my dogs were barking i i was exhausted and dave dave had a day with uh roads and so he was kind of like he didn't i mean and to dylan's credit he just goes it's not gonna happen is it and then d. Then Dave sent a text to Dylan and I later being like, I think I could make this happen. And then Dylan just said, yeah, I'm keeping a low profile tonight. Yeah, that makes sense. Let's not make this happen.

One other thing before we hit breaking news. I did want to acknowledge the backers are absolutely the realists. I sent those screenshots over over the weekend. I don't know if you'd seen it because you were in the heart of moving all day. I think I missed it. But there was a backer who had a birthday party thrown by a roommate of hers, entirely Wilmont's theme. See, that's what you love to see. Like name tags, Tide was there serving cocktails and all.

Streamers, the whole walls were covered in decor with the Wilmont's logo hanging across their apartment. I want an invite to this next one. I mean, I don't recall the backer's name, and I don't want to out him, because I didn't ask for consent in that regard. But huge move to have a Wilmonds team birthday party. So congrats to you guys for booking events now. Big shout. Yeah.

We don't have a liquor license yet for out-of-place events, but we'll get one soon. You can just bring an external drinks provider. That works. Is it time for Breastbreaking News? Let's do it. Sure. You want your theme song?

Yeah, what is it? Love that. Love that. Thank you for having me on today. Would you guys like to go? KJ, since you're at the desk, I will leave the floor to you for first pick. Let's go Burger King, Generations Old Monarchies, or Austin Real Estate. Let's see.

I'll have it my way last. Let's go with Austin Real Estate. KJ, according to austin.culturemap.com, the record for the most expensive house in Austin has been shattered. Let's go. Meant to tell you guys, my reload got bumped up by a few months. I'll be down here in the summertime.

Oh, hey. So you don't want to guess the price here? 38. 15. 38.1. I guess Will wins. 38.9. Let's go.

Randy's no help, by the way. Over your shoulder, he just put up a 0-4. What does that mean? Exactly. Very helpful, Randy. I don't think he understands that 40 is not oriented the way that he put his hands. So this is a relocate. You know who this is?

Nobody knows yet, but it's apparently an A-lister. You fucker. I thought you were going to actually know who it was. I don't know. I thought you were trying to figure out who this was for months. Yeah, it's an A-lister Oh you fucker I thought you were Going to actually know Who it was I don't know I thought you were Trying to figure out Who this was for months Yeah it's an A-lister

It's not Saban I saw him out at I saw him out at ACC Man he was playing I swear With some of the boosters 11,405 square foot House with

Custom quarried limestone Okay African sapele wood. Brazilian Ipe wood in the guest house, obviously. You got to hit your guests with the Brazilian Ipe wood. Absolutely. The wall in the... I'm just going down the list here.

The wall in the main house is molded like the bow of a boat. The bow of a boat. Excuse me. Floating staircase in the main house. I don't know how that's possible. Nude mermaid law? Where does a floating staircase even go to? Venetian plaster walls and ceilings.

A powder room sink carved from rare black limestone. Okay, that's outdated. Seems unnecessary. Fireplace hearth made of soapstone, a private lagoon, and three Sub-Zero wine fridges. Oh. I don't really need Sub-Zero in my wine fridge. Do you need a lagoon, though?

The private lagoon. I need a grotto. A mainstay of any tour of the Playboy Mansion. And there's no indication as to who bought this. No clue. They went through Catherine Scarborough and Michelle Turnquist of Anglin Vulkers. Okay. God, I think that's going to be a nice little payday for those two.

I was about to say, let's do 3% on 40 million. Yeah, shouts to them. It's a big number. Good for them. No indication, though. It's a little gaudy for my taste. I like to keep my homes under 40 million. Well, you should reach out and see if they need any help mounting their TVs.

Ooh, that's a good call. You and Drew, man. Yeah, we're a team now. Hunk Mounting is the name. College Hunks Mounting. I tried to offer Drew a beer during it, and he said, do you have any whiskey? I'll just take that on the rocks.

And I was like, that's okay. It's like two in the afternoon. I was like, it's three. I'm like, what are you? Okay. Did he have some whiskey? He had numerous. Okay, Drew.

Yeah, went well. I'm excited to listen back to the episode to hear how the new move's going. Not great. Oh, I'm sorry. Hey. Never mind. Okay. I was about to go down the Dave Matthews road.

Yeah, I was going to say, I apologize for anything I may or may not have said about Crash. Generations old modern. I don't know if you guys caught this interview last night with Meghan Markle and Prince Harry. Oh, unfortunately. We've heard. I caught a little bit of it. What it feels like to me is that they were treated horrendously

as a member of the royal family, and they call it the institution, which is kind of badass. Well, there's a difference, Brett, between the institution and the family. News to me. Per them.

See, I didn't watch it. I'm just Washington Post is the highlights. So I don't really understand what's going on here. It sounds like there wasn't anything new that was divulged besides the kid thing, which is pretty damning with Archie, and that Megan had suicidal thoughts while she was a part of the... Those were the two big hitters there. I am just floored and shocked that the royal family has some problematic stuff. Who would have known that the royal family has skeletons in their closet?

It's crazy. Did they ask about Prince Philip during the interview? Or sorry, not Prince Philip. Andrew. Prince Andrew during the interview. Nope. Unclear. Nope.

But they said all topics were on the table, so you've got to think that. Except for the one who might be connected to a global pedophilia ring. That one's not on the table. Yeah. I do plan on going back and watching the majority of this, but I did catch the last about 25 minutes last night. With commercials, that means I caught about five minutes. Mostly looking at you because you are the real family expert. Yeah, I think. And as I told Sally and Dave's wife Alyssa this morning, I think I'm going to take a step back from caring.

Wow. That's where you draw the line. Yeah. I just enjoy the crown. But as far as the current family goes, I don't think they're worth even putting any emotional investment into as a common person from a country that has nothing to do with them. You know, if I was Harry, you know what I would have said? We didn't fight that war to get away from him, you know what I mean? Hell yeah. If I was Harry, I would have just been like, I'm not going to let you wear your crown this time around. Okay. Randy Rogers,

not a lot of people would have got that one. You know what Meghan should have done? She should have gone up to the queen and taken the tiara off of her head and put it on her head and been like, it's me now. I'm the queen around here. I'm that bitch. Sorry, that was a bachelor joke. I'm going to go ahead and guess

that the page six spin would be American media laps up actresses story or something along those lines like they're just going to spend this as she's an actor she's you know and they're feeding into her game yeah british tabloids are ruth they're gonna have a time with this they're meanies they're very mean they're basically saying that she like everybody goes through the scrutiny and the public pressure like get over it yep yeah and everything she said last night's like uh i was

treated a little differently yeah the bits that i kind of took in after the fact uh it's always good to have a reminder that oprah is absolutely still effing queen in that kind of form like we don't have too many of those shows outside of those who, you know, I don't watch 60 minutes or anything. It's not my cup of tea, but Oprah still is freaking queen when it comes to like making an interview like that, where it's just cover so much ground with such a big, you know,

ambiguous story and making it be like, all right, here's a conversation. Feel it out. She killed it. Yeah. Speaking of Queens, happy international women's day.

Absolutely. Speaking of international women happy International Women's Day. Absolutely. Speaking of International Women's Day, Burger King UK. Such a professional. The scene is tough. It's not going well for them. They decided to tweet, and I quote, women belong in the kitchen. Send. Send.

Somebody hit send on that tweet. Do we know if they pressed send or did they schedule it? It's 3.01 a.m. local time. So to me, that's the little trick of scheduling it for one minute after 3 o'clock. That's a trademark move over at PGP. It's like starting with the seventh check in your checkbook. This was via the Twitter web app. I don't know if that means more schedule.

That takes TweetDeck out of the conversation. It just means more. Yeah. So they decided to follow up that tweet with a thread saying, and I quote, if they want to, of course. Well, hold on. Read the whole thing. If they want to, of course.

Yet only 20% of chefs or women were on a mission to change the gender ratio in the restaurant industry by empowering female employees with the opportunity to pursue a culinary career. So, they clearly followed it up knowing that obviously that was going to be the follow-up tweet in the thread. But somebody, and I very correctly pointed out, that could just fit in one tweet. Yes. That could just fit in one tweet. Okay, but if they did that, would it have brought as much attention to their new scholarship program? I don't know. You know what I could use in this thread?

I don't know. In this tweet thread? A link to what they're actually doing. Yep. They need to have a website here that's actually informational to show that this wasn't just a reckless tweet and like a claim i want to see a website that spells out everything at this point is there a social media manager is whoever's in charge of their social media gonna have a job by the end of the day yeah dude this is a highly effective tweet. If what you're looking to do is get some engagement, then this is it.

They got all of the engagement. It's 108,000 retweets right now, 120,000 quote tweets, and 412,000 likes. And counting. If they really wanted to support the movement, they could change their name to Burger Queen. Okay. Just for a day? Just for a day. Thank you, David.

That's a good call. Dave, you just solved their problem. Hit me saw their problem mustard whopper underrated like musty whops musty wops i will be as incredulous as all of the customers in their fake videos when you tell me that you can get two burgers for four dollars and i'm gonna drive away if you change your mind. Oh, it's a bad commercial. It's the worst commercial. But I'll be as shocked as them if any material changes come out of it. I don't think there should be. It's just a poor execution. The third tweet in the thread is, we're proud to be launching a new scholarship program, so it doesn't exist.

They did what they call burying the lead. I'll ask the question. That's not everyone's line. Burger Queen is the best marketing. Yeah, it's good. Hey, guys. It's good. Y'all fuck with chicken fries? I'll ask the question Burger Queen is the best marketing Hey guys Y'all fuck with chicken fries? I'd fuck with some chicken fries You know what I like?

Chicken fries Can I give a take that's Inevitably I can't talk today, I'm sorry guys Gonna get me roasted? You never had them That lit's a one hit wonder At most Sorry, guys. Did they get me roasted? You never had them. That lit's a one-hit wonder?

At most. The Burger King chicken tenders, the buffalo chicken tenders with the sauce. My favorite chicken tender on the planet. Nah, nah. We got to end this podcast. We got to get out of here. All right, man. Guys, yeah. So with that, I guess tell your friends to subscribe.

We stan a Burger Queen. Shout out to all the Burger Queens out there. Shout out to all the short Burger Kings. Shall we? Yeah. Anyone want to do it? Nobody knows how to end the podcast when Dylan's not here. Bye.

I gotta tink. I gotta get out of here. Bye-bye. out of here perfect bye