Circling Back - McConaughey For Governor & Randy's Dating Profile

Episode Date: April 19, 2021

Podcast Week? Uhhhh h’yeah it is. In honor of it, we discuss our Weekends in Fun, break down the viral bobcat attack video, McConaughey’s run for Texas Governor, making Randy’s dating profile ft. Randy, and Will’s Breaking News. Contribute to our campaign to benefit the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society: pages.lls.org/mwoy/ctx/austin21/wmedia Support us on Patreon and receive weekly episodes for as low $5 per month: www.patreon.com/circlingbackpodcast Watch all of our full episodes on YouTube: www.youtube.com/washedmedia Shop Washed Merch: www.washedmedia.shop (0:00) Fun & Easy Banter (11:12) Recapping This Weekend (28:50) Bobcat Neighborhood Attack (45:10) McConaughey For Governor? (56:30) Randy’s Dating Profile ft. Randy (1:10:26) Will’s Breaking News Support This Episode’s Sponsors Fitbod: www.fitbod.me/steam (25% off) Headspace: www.headspace.com/circling (1-month free trial) Poncho: www.ponchooutdoors.com (CIRCLINGBACK for free hat or t-shirt) Babbel: www.babbel.com (STEAM for 3 free months) --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/circling-back/message Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

All right, we're back circling back podcast presented by busy hard seltzer. The only hard seltzer with vitamin C and super fruit acerola. My name is Will DeFries to my right. David. R-r-r-r-roll! Sorry, Will. You got to me before I'd had my coffee. Wow.

You know how I get. Dude, I don't talk to you. It's weird that Dave sat here silent for the hour that we've been in the studio so far, and he just didn't say one word to us. It's actually about half empty, so I took a really big sip't say one word to us. It's actually about half empty. I took a really big sip. Okay. Real big sip.

It's my new ska band. Okay. I hate it. I don't hate it at all. Dylan, I just tagged you in something on Twitter. I don't know if you saw it, but you should probably check this out. It's by the New York Times. Why the worst NBA player is probably still better than you.

Does that really need to be an article? I think we all kind of assume that, right? The guy wrote it. That thing where you approach a retired NBA player and challenge him to a game of one-on-one? Don't do that thing. Yeah. I mean, it was Brian Scalabrine. What's his name? Scalabrine?

Scalabrine. Who is, I don't know, seven years out of the league. And still 6'11 and still probably 300-plus pounds. And, yeah, no shit. Did you call him Scalabrine? Scalabrine. Scalabrine. Oh, hey!

Yeah, we've all seen the video. No one need to do a write-up about this. Well, I mean, I feel like they might be writing it in response to a small-to-midsize podcast host who has... It wouldn't be the first time that they threw shade at one of us. Just by saying, I get one lucky J on an NBA player. There's no such thing as a lucky J. Yeah, there is. Who did they at? Was it you?

I turned down the opportunity to be interviewed for an article they were doing on wedding announcements because I was worried that the person interviewing me was going to paint me in a negative light. You thought it was a hit piece. And so I was, my only concern was that like, I just didn't want the New York, if someone Googled my name, I didn't want the first thing to show up to be that, uh, the New York Times shitting on me. And so I decided to not do the interview and that they just referred to me as one critic.

And then they, they quoted some stuff from PGP. Nice. So I'm a critic for the New York Times. Pretty sick. People forget that I was published by Time Magazine. It's not a big deal,

but it's true. Time's kind of fallen out of favor, but yeah. I don't think so. Were you named their person of the year? Is that why? Uh-huh.

Uh-huh. Did you win their bit madness that they did over at Time? Yeah. That's pretty sick. Yeah, it was pretty big. Was there a bunch of controversy regarding the people that were included in that? they did over at Time? Yeah. That's pretty sick. Yeah, it was pretty big. Was there a bunch of controversy regarding the people that were included in that?

Like fajitas and shit? Yeah. People were upset. Breaking news. Time Magazine now accepts Bitcoin as payment for subscriptions in the United States and Canada. Can we do that on Patreon? Can we start accepting Bitcoin? I would love to increase our exposure to Bitcoin and other cryptocurrencies.

It's something I've been wanting to talk to you all about, and there's no better time than now. Y'all got a few minutes? No. We're doing a podcast. It's nice to sit down with y'all. I don't trust you at all. I'm peeping my doge. Looks like it's going well. Is your doge going to the moon? Dave's up like 20 bucks, man. Dude, don't be surprised

if I roll up in a new whip tomorrow. Well, you're getting it that fast, huh? Yeah. Been looking at it. What are you thinking, getting a Doge Charger? An Alfa Romeo. Switch. Doge Charger's good.

I don't know if Randy liked it, but he's going to pick up the pen begrudgingly. Like a Dodge? Yeah. Dude, does that hit me? Did it hit me? Yeah. Dude, does that hit me? Did it hit me? Yeah. Yeah. I'm more of a Cummins diesel.

We knew that about you, I think. What's the douchiest car you can drive? An H2. That was a very quick and thought-out answer. Imagine driving it. They haven't been around for a while, though, right? They stopped making them? I don't know.

I think they did. I think they've been out. Didn't they upgrade it into, like, the HJ now? Dude, why are you so horny all the time? What's up with FJ Cruisers? Are those douchey or are they just weird? Wait, wait, wait. The what?

The FJ Cruiser. Footjoy makes a vehicle now? They should. It's just, like, it's cool. It's, like, acceptable for young people, but it's mainly for dads. Like no one's going to make fun of you for being foot joy guy, but like there's better options. I don't know if there are any better options at this point. For gloves, I don't know if there is.

There's no good looking golf shoes out there. No, there are. Y'all just didn't. You haven't seen mine yet, apparently. No, we've all seen yours. Dude, mine are sick. Yours are a tough scene. Mine are swag, dude.

It's like showing up somewhere with like your, it's like when you're in like high school and your dad dropped you off and you're like, fuck, I can't show up with my swagless dad right now. Dude, I show up to the range and everyone stops by like, hey man, where'd you get those? Dude, how much were those at Academy? Yeah. They were, I think they were $60. Oh, did you get those?

$59.99 on Amazon, actually. Those are such clearance rack, though. They're terrible. They are the most clearance clearance rack, though. They're terrible. They are the most clearance rack of all time. They're so bad, and I love them. Do you remember that segment we used to do, the clearance rack? Or we did one? Wasn't that a thing?

Well, that's where J-Bone only shopped. As if it's the only way he could buy clothes. Yeah, all his polos are brandless, logo-less, everything, just off the rack. Clearing shit. It's so funny. I only do brand shit. Call me Elton Brand. Oh, shit.

I just need more of it. Duke legend. Call me Elton John. That's good. That was way better than I was anticipating. Yeah. You know, he's got a lot of hits. A lot of people underrate him.

People sleep on Elton John. People do. No one talks about him. I don't think they do. He didn't have a major motion picture about his life made. He's got a serious catapult. I almost re-watched that this weekend, unfortunately, but I luckily didn't have to do that. Dylan was so out on that movie when it opened up with just the most aggressive musical performance,

like show tune. They needed to redo the famous musical performances from him as opposed to just doing weird musical stuff. I'm not a big musical guy. I don't like musicals. I'm not either, but I liked it. It was an entertaining movie, pound for pound. I don't like my actors breaking into the song unexpectedly, okay?

It's not my thing. You like to know exactly what's coming to you next. You don't like surprises. But then I was, like, I was vocal about it. I was like, man, I didn't know this was a musical. And people were like, oh, it's a song about music. What'd you think? Like, every biopic about a musician is a straight-up musical.

It didn't make any sense. I mean... I got flustered. Compared to the Queen movie, this thing looked like The Godfather. I didn't care for either one, really. The one thing that the Elton John movie was missing was, like, an actor who was going to give just a very okay performance and then go on to win an Oscar for it. He did get nominated for the Elton John movie.

He did? He did not win. He would have been more deserving than Mr. Robot. I saw Mulan for the first time this weekend. Watched it with my niece. I saw you sparring with people over the soundtrack. Well, some people were trying to act like I ranked other soundtracks, like in a way, from my tweet.

There was no ranking system for other soundtracks. I'm just saying off the top of my head, there are better soundtracks than what Mulan has to offer. Mulan's a really good movie. I'm not familiar with the movie. I mess with Mulan pretty hard at this point. I'm so deep in the wires, so I really care about it right now. They're pretty much the same.

Okay, so if they remade that, did they remake the song, Moulin Rouge? I don't know if they did. I heard the remake doesn't have any songs in it, so I'm out. They also don't have Mushu in it, so I'm even further out. If you don't have Eddie Murphy as a dragon in the movie, I don't want to watch it. If your movie doesn't have Maya, Pink, Christina Aguilera, and somebody else. Lil' Kim?

Lil' Kim. Then I'm out. There's another song. A video. They redid the song Rhythm of the Night for Moulin Rouge. The dance song? And it's an incredible remake of that song. That's a good song. If you go to the Moulin Rouge

soundtrack, you'll start bobbing that head. This is the rhythm of the night. No, but it's a different one. It's a different vibe. I was wondering how that got worked into Moulin. It might be called something else, but it's a different one. It's a different vibe. Oh, yeah. I was wondering how that got worked into Mulan. It might be called something else, but it's a similar name to that. Man. So you're saying there's no dance beat?

You can dance to it. You can absolutely dance to it. I want to dance. You guys seen that movie? Days and Confused. Good one. Good stuff. Check us out on the stream room.

Let's get some announcements out of the way. Slow ride. First and foremost, we're continuing to partner with LLS, the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society. They're the largest nonprofit dedicated to creating a world without blood cancers. And since 1949, they've invested nearly $1.3 billion in groundbreaking research, pioneering many of today's most innovative approaches. You can hit the donate link in the description of this episode, and you can see it all over the WASH Media site as well. Go check it out.

Go support it. Make it happen. Also, go follow Circling Back Pod and WASH Media on the Grom. Is it TikTok week? Don't make any promises. Is it TikTok week? Meaning what? Like, we're going to do tiktoks hard to say you are yeah you're the tick you're you're spearheading our tiktok initiative i don't even have tiktok on my phone dog that's lame yeah it's probably for the best given what

the first the tiktoks that i'm always served when i open it be careful dave everyone's gonna come at you being like that's because you only look at those i I don't use the app. I literally don't use it. I've opened it three times in my life, and I just opened it before the pod, and it was very aggressive. TNA? It wasn't even creative. It's like, oh, here's a curvy young lady jumping off a bridge into some water. You should follow Chasen and just get served stuff that's like Chasen adjacent.

Say that five times fast. Is he still doing his thing on the talk? Hard to say, man. Is he better than Peter? Gosh, that guy stinks. Let's go. Let's go. Let's get COVID, baby.

Let's go. I'd rather get beers with Peter than Chase. No doubt. I don't want to have beers with either of them. No doubt. If I'm having beers with them, that's one of those situations where beforehand I tell Sally, I'm like, hey, I'm having one beer and I'm getting out. If I need you to call

me, call me. I don't want to sit there with Peter or Chasen for too long. Damn. Go leave a review or five-star rating. We'll take either at this point. The reviews lately have been torch. Shouts to everyone who's left one. Tell a friend about the podcast. YouTube.com slash watchmedia. Watchmedia.shop

and Patreon, baby. We're doing WordStuff tomorrow. There's still time to get your stories in if you're listening right now, but there's not much time because your boy's hitting the ground running today to make this rundown. We've got a lot of good stories in the hopper. If you submit your story through WordStuff at watchmedia.com or at watchmedia.com and just fill out the form,

you might find yourself with a nice little free month at Patreon. That's a $10 value, folks. It is. Imagine. We're essentially giving you free month of Patreon. That's a $10 value, folks. It is. Imagine. We're essentially giving you free lunch. Yeah. It's like, hey, go have Chipotle on us, man. Now accepting Canadian currency.

We do. If you have $14 Canadian, I can get you on the optimized tier. That was a funny golf course conversation. I think we should pay them the difference. Pay that man his money. You know how the exchange rate works, Dave? That's the equivalent of 10 U.S. I don't shop there anymore.

I'm more of a gap guy. Okay. Okay. Is it time to recap this weekend in fun presented by Fitbod? Wow. Yes, it is. Don't get stuck doing the same workouts. Making progress towards the future you means overcoming new challenges,

and Fitbod creates a fitness program that continually adapts to new exercises and dynamic intensity that adjusts to how you're progressing. So you'll be challenged to meet your goals at your own pace. There's no perfect body that everyone can achieve, guys. You guys might think there is. Always striving for perfection. You can't get there. But what you can do is you can continually become a better version of yourself.

That's something I've been wanting you to do lately, Dylan. That's the journey. You're a fit bod guy. You've been using it more than all of us, I think. Yeah. I want to have a fit bod, but I don't do as many workouts as you, so I'm not using it as much. Well, maybe you should take the app seriously.

I need to take it more seriously because I have faith in it. You basically tell it what you want. What are you hoping to do with your body, your journey? What do you want to do? And they will tailor workouts just for you. You always hear guys, like, hitting up their boy, being like, oh, like, what are you doing? Like, what are you doing over there? They don't know what they're talking about.

No workout is one size fits all. And FitBod creates a fitness program that continually adapts to you so you can stay challenged with new exercises, pacing, and intensity based on where you are and where you want to be. Where do you want to be, David? I just want to be happy. I just want to be happy with my own body, secure in myself. You probably have a ways to go, honestly. I do. Yeah. Thank you, Dylan. They have an algorithm that uses data and analytics to help you build on your last workout to maximize your results. So whether you're exercising three days a week or twice a day, every workout is scientifically proven to be better than the last. That's what I like about it.

The data, the algorithms, all that. If we have next-gen data on pretty much anything, I think this squad buys in at this point. Yeah. It's super easy to use. It even has HD video tutorials to make learning new exercises a breeze. It integrates with your other fitness and health apps like Apple Health, Fitbit, Strava.

The personalized training can be tough on a budget, but FitBot is only $9.99 a month or $59.99 a year. That's like half off for a year. That's math in my head that I just did, not to brag. This guy. STEM guy over here. I put the M in STEM. Ooh, stimulus. Sign up now and you can

get 25% off your membership. Pick up the pace on your fitness journey with FitBot today and your future self will thank you. Get 25% off your membership at FitBod.me slash steam. That's 25% off at FitBod.me slash steam. Dylan, what'd you do this weekend? Man, I can't wait to talk about my weekend. Let's go.

All right, Friday, we played golf. We did. It was fun. I had a show. I sneaky had a great time considering I played so terribly, which it was expected. Battling back issues, battling just a bad golf game in general. Can't keep a drive in bounds. A lot of excuses coming from the Dillon camp right now.

But I had fun. For me, when I accept an invitation to play golf, it's really just about the camaraderie, the mobbing. You and the comrades. Friendship building at this point because the golf is like, eh. Golf is secondary to you. I think after the first hole, I told Will, my main problem with golf right now is I don't enjoy it.

But I had a lot of fun. Big thanks to Ryan for bringing us out again. You need to do like two range sessions and you'll be good. Yeah. The back held up decently oh yeah i mean you didn't you didn't complain about it all day like i thought you were gonna so dylan did so i'm gonna pull back the curtain here dylan did something no one's doing on the golf course and they have comfort stations at this golf course because they do it right there

it's a nice touch another reason why i accepted the invitation all because of these huts and some of these comfort stations they've got got everything. They've got canned Gatorade, which no one's doing anymore. Vintage cans. Yeah. Which I absolutely chugged. They have... All different kinds of snacks. Yeah, they have the frozen Uncrustables.

They have Nutter Butters. And Dylan went in, and Dylan did something that literally no one is doing, and he took out a little tiny container that had one, exactly one, hard-boiled egg in it. And Dylan was just eating a hard-boiled egg in the cart. He was. On the golf course. He was.

That is very, I don't want to say forward-thinking, but you wouldn't think, a golf course, the rest of the snacks are, you know, uncrustables, things that are, like, good and maybe not the best thing for you. To have a hard-boiled egg, and not like a prepackaged preservative-doubt hard-boiled egg like one that their kitchen clearly did back there boiling uh to have that as an option like just to throw a couple back is uh pretty impressive they also have glass bottle topo chico just ready to grab and go which is sick yeah we got that yeah we got sprayed

remember that yeah we did get sprayed. Yeah, they were popping. I had a lot of fun. A lot of fun. Saturday, I got to see my little niece again, Quinn. She was sleeping the entire time, so I didn't get to hold her, which is very unfortunate. I heard she was fake sleeping, so she didn't have to get held by you, dude. She would never do that to me. I had parks Saturday and Sunday.

So Sunday, he got to meet. I had parks Saturday and Sunday. So Sunday, he got to meet Brittany's daughter for the first time. They squad up? The most mega cute scene you can possibly imagine. Who's Brittany for the folks at home just tuning in? Brittany is bae. Okay. Brittany is bae. Is she Mooder Golds or just simply bae?

Just simply bae. She's the queso of your life right now. Yes. Pizza of my life as well. She's bae. She's your little pizza girl? life right now. Yes. Pizza of my life as well. She's bae. She's your little pizza girl? It was cute, man. She's my little pizza girl.

They hugged it out when they met, and they just went off playing the rest of the day. Got along really well. Really enjoyed it. It was perfect, honestly. We got a really cute pic, the four of us. It was – couldn't have asked for a better day. It was perfect. I'll grab it if you're real, dog.

Yeah, I missed this one. We went to a baby shower on the lake, this really sick house. Wow. Okay. Dude, they had – Listen to me, I'm not up in the world going to baby showers on the lake. Yeah, cool, man. I didn't buy the house.

I was just a guest. I went to my neighbor's above ground pool. Listen to this. You didn't offer to buy it on the spot? They had sliders there. They had bacon. And instead of like your typical mayonnaise mustard situation, they had peanut butter and jelly on the burgers.

Sounds weird. Amazing. I've heard of people putting peanut butter on burgers before, but I've never actually seen it in practice. It was so damn good. I'm not kidding. Did they have a stand where you could make your own bowl of oatmeal with cottage cheese? No.

That's too bad. I didn't have that. Randy would have been just hounding that one. Was that traumatic for you when you showed up and saw that there were sliders? Because I've read the book on you. You could not hit that. You were waving at those things in high school. That's a fair point.

It's kind of what kept you out of... Yeah, that among many other things. Can you imagine? I would love to be the dude working the catering gig where you have the sliders and you're at the station cutting the prime rib off of it and just being like, hey, dude, why. Can you imagine? I would love to be like the dude working the catering gig where you have like the sliders and you're like at the station cutting the prime rib off of it and just being like, hey dude,

why don't you slide? That's so ridiculous. Great day. We close it down by going to Matt's. Wow. Awesome, man. Again, I think my AT&T.

Dude, it was the four of us, man. It was all about the kids yesterday. Sometimes you get bad service. Dave has a kid. Oh, Will. Thank you, Will. If we all about the kids yesterday. Sometimes you get bad service. Dave has a kid. Oh, Will. Thank you, Will. If we're keeping track of how many times you've been to Matt's without inviting me, the score is like 1,000 to 1.

So let's slow down over here, sir. Looking through my texts. Let's slow down. Yeah. That's cool, dude. I had a salad for dinner last night. That was sick. Brittany knows everyone in Austin.

So we were just holding court. People would just come up and say hi to her. It was crazy. Wow. I thought you were the guy at Matt's. They got him to say hi to him, dude. That's why you always want to go there, so you'll get recognized. Definitely the second most popular one in this relationship.

It was wild. Totally agree. Anyway, we had a lot of fun, man. That's how it normally is. Well, okay. Now you're just getting shots. Yeah, we're just taking unnecessary shots at you. I'm sorry.

Anyway, I don't really care about your weekends. I wouldn't have gone to Matt's anyway. I guess we'll hear about it. I made a nice bolognese. I'm sure it was trash. It was good. Like everything else you make. I'm sorry. Anyway, I don't really care about your weekends. I wouldn't have gone to Matt's anyway. I guess we'll hear about it. I made a nice bolognese. I'm sure it was trash. Like everything else you make. It was good. The beef broth, the beef stock, that's a nice touch.

Shout out to JR. That's a nice touch. What did I do? Yeah, what'd you do? The golf was so fun. It was. We were worried about, weather didn't look like it was going to hold. The weather was not, we played with wet socks all day. Yeah, and you know what? The temperature was so comfortable, it really didn't matter.

It was overcast, very calm, not much wind. Had fun. Didn't really like being seven over through three holes. I thought that was a bad way to start. That's normally not what I like to do. all in all we had fun who won wolf a classic us nobody paid out i know it wasn't me i think i think it might have been me you had the better back nine i had a i had a for me uh a very good back nine and i think that i might have made some good money on that back nine but dylan didn't keep track of uh holes 15 through 17 the scores which was really convenient

when trying to keep your own score when you're putting together a good back nine i was having so much fun i just forgot and then i didn't even get to add up my score from the front nine because i didn't even see i we just dispersed the second we got back to the clubhouse yeah i had to get back so did you i missed i had two eagle putts that i missed. I don't know if you guys remember. Yeah, Dave, come on. Make one eagle putt. How are you not going to make one, dog? I don't know. That was loud. That was more of a rooster.

Tiny turkey there. What sound do eagles make? I don't think I've ever heard one. They move in silence like lasagna. Do they? Really? Real eagles do. You can actually hear the G in eagle, though, so that's a little misleading.

Saw Club Cool's own Barrett Dudley on Saturday. Wow. He got a head off. He absolutely put me in a body bag. You look good, though. I saw you on Alyssa's story, and I thought, you know what? Dave looks pretty good. I'm not going to name names, but someone, when I asked, are we sitting inside or out? I was told we were sitting inside.

I was like, okay. So I dressed accordingly, how I thought my inside fit would go. I got there. I dropped my wife and child off, and then I went to the parking situation, a little parking garage across the way. And when I got in, I walked inside, and I was the dude who walked in everybody kind of looked at and i was looking around didn't see any faces i recognized and i was like oh okay and um turns out we sat outside not only did we sit outside but barrett was uh prepared to dress out to sit outside and he was rocking denim shirt uh jeans

boots just a classy pair of boots. No fur. No fur, but. Red bottoms? Not red bottoms. And then a hat. Not like a Dylan Fedora hat, but like a. Wide brim. Not a gas station fedora, but like an actual nice hat.

Right, right. Is it still felt season? People are wondering. I'm sure Barrett knows. I wasn't going to ask him. Right. But it was tough sitting there with him knowing that he was just murdering me. If he's swagging off, it works in all seasons. I was going to ask, at what point is it uncool to wear felt?

If it's a hot summer day and you're outside. But it's Barrett Dudley at the same time, so he can do whatever he wants. It's Club Cool's own Barrett Dudley. Right. By the way, if you like Club Cool, and you should, check it out. We talked shorts for like 45 minutes, and it was the most fun I've ever had talking about shorts. If you wear on sneakers, make sure to not listen, because you're going to throw them

out afterwards. Really? Mm-hmm. No, no, no. Yeah. No, it's not that bad. We don't don't. I've been hovering over the purchase button on some ons for like two weeks now.

I was listening to it the other day while I was doing some work, and I was just like taking Ls in stride while I was trying to be productive. I like them. I just think that there's a certain segment of guys who wear them that are – Oh, a little Allbirds-y? You've basically hit it on the head. They essentially said it's the Allbird graduate shoe. Which isn't a bad thing. But they look so much better than all birds they

do i have friends who are into all birds and on i'm the dumbass who didn't know they were called ons i was calling them oc for at least six months wow dude i'm a total dumbass wow okay will did you do anything worth talking about? No, I played golf twice. Played Lions Municipal Golf Course. How's the body feel? Yesterday, my golf muscles were quite sore. I haven't been playing much lately. And, yeah, so it was just tough. I slept in a different bed all weekend.

We're currently displaced from our apartment, which is just very sick. And so I just didn't get the rest I needed. And combining that with just not using my golf muscles often enough, it's just been tough. And so, we're recovering we're trying to something tells me my golf game's about to go to shit though and this uh kid pops out you know what I mean yeah it will it's kind of what happened to you guys you haven't been the same since Dave I got that dad strength kicking in though you guys may have witnessed my last golf round ever of all time. Shut up, dude.

You're such a baby about golf. I know. So are you going to get mad if we don't invite you moving forward? No, I want the invites. No. Because, like, I mean, I don't want – if you're saying that it's your last one, then I'm going to stop inviting you. I'm not going to dangle that carrot in front of you.

You have more club head speed than any of us. Just go to the range twice for me. Go to the range twice. Two times. That's it? Yeah. I mean, like, you're not off by much. It's just when you're off, you're not finding it

because you hit it way far the other way. Yeah. There was a time where you topped a three wood, and me and Ryan were standing not in front of you, but we're like watching. We're like, okay, I've got to watch out. And it came humming by about 15 feet. And I was like, dude, if the ball speed on that thing,

on your topped ball, that would have done some serious damage. Yeah, yeah. I won't figure it out. I'll try. No, you won't. I'll try. Go on a swing journey. Brett has a PDF he can loan you.

It's just a time-consuming endeavor. I gave you a swing tip. You said it worked. It did. Not like it fixed my shit, but it made me feel more comfortable with the ball. It ain't Pepto-Bismol, you know what I mean? That's really bad. People are laughing.

People are like, wow, that is good. We need a laugh track. We do need a laugh track. I'm going to start workshopping other laughs that I can do after I do something like that, so then people will be like, oh, there's people laughing. How many patrons for us to record a laugh track of us laughing and putting it on the board? Like 10 more? You know, there's a theory out there.

It's not mine, but I do support it somewhat, that a lot of sitcoms would be just completely unfunny without a laugh track supporting them. Yes. Just saying. Friends is thrown out there quite a bit. Just saying. Oh.

Just saying. I'm not saying. Someone's saying. Anyway. I think you might be saying. Maybe. Unfortunately. Anyway. I think you might be saying. Maybe. Unfortunately. Maybe.

I think you're kind of saying this. This podcast probably wouldn't be very funny if you didn't laugh. That's true. If the words Frazier come out of your mouth in this scenario, I'm going to fucking fight you. Did Frazier have a laugh track? You're going to come across as a fail. Everything had a laugh track back then. Everything.

Frazier seems above the laugh track, but I guess you're right. It's like the Winnie the Pooh meme. The Friends laugh track is just regular Winnie the Pooh, and then the Fra the laugh track, but I guess you're right. It's like the Winnie the Pooh meme. The Friends laugh track is just regular Winnie the Pooh and then the Frasier laugh track is like Winnie the Pooh dressed up in a tuxedo with his monocle on. Dude, imagine watching Big Bang Theory without a laugh track. Imagine.

I can't imagine watching it either way. Exactly. But some people laugh because they feel like they're supposed to because the people on TV are laughing. Doesn't this seem like Randy would be into Big Bang Theory? Yeah. He's weirdly silent right now. You know, we have one of our really good friends likes the show.

I won't say his or her name. Is it Bay? No, it's not Bay. Is it Bay Rhett Dudley? No. Not that I know of. That's going to stick. I was hoping.

Should we talk about Headspace real quick before we get into the meat of this episode that people really want to hear? Yes. We're all big fans of Headspace. Love. I don't even know if I need to read copy for Headspace because I love it so much. Love Headspace. Headspace was like one of the first apps I downloaded when the pandemic hit. I was like, you know what?

I want some good Headspace here. I'd already used it before that. I had actually been a long time kind of know, kind of on the fringe guy. And now I'm just all in. Because wouldn't it be great if there was just a pocket-sized guy that helped you sleep, focus, act, or just be better? Well, there is. And if you have 10 minutes, headspace can change your life. It's your daily dose of mindfulness in the form of guided meditations in an easy-to-use app.

It's one of the only meditation apps advancing the field of mindfulness and meditation through clinically validated research. So whatever the situation, Headspace can really help you feel better. If you're overwhelmed, they even have a three-minute SOS meditation for you. S-O-S, please. Sometimes three minutes is all you need, man. Straight up.

I asked a meditation expert one time on the Sunday Scaries podcast. I said, you know, when you meditate, do you have to do it for 10 minutes? Like is there like a certain amount of time that you need to achieve? And she's like, as long as you're just taking some time and setting it aside, you can do it for as little as three minutes. It doesn't matter. Yeah. And she's right.

Dude, it's a great way to just shut the brain off, clear it, kind of reset a little bit. Just feel this dope afterward. I use it the most when I can't sleep. And I think to myself, you know what? I want to go to sleep meditation right now, and I can't remember finishing one ever. Oh, it'll put your boy to sleep. Snoozing.

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one-month trial with access to Headspace's full library of meditations for every situation. This is the best deal offered right now. So to headspace.com circling today wednesday i think it was after wednesday's episode it was one of those times when you know we log off we leave the office we disperse and we feel good about podcast week you know from a from the free episode thought we closed it out very strong. And unfortunately this week we had some, you know, the late week news dump. And it was the Bobcat video that took the internet by storm. And I think we say this a lot. I don't know if we've ever been sent or tagged in something more than this video. Yeah.

If Sunday rolls around. I was getting tagged in it yesterday and I was like, man, you got to. It's dropped like four days ago yeah come on this is this is old internet dude I thought about going live and just to do analysis

because I was like man we're really doing people a disservice but it's best for us to let it marinate more people have had a chance to see the video if you haven't seen it I would just go type

Bobcat into a search engine or a Twitter engine and just check it out. Yeah. It's a wild little video. I have several questions about the video. Sure. How did we know off the jump that this was a Bobcat? I believe when the fella posted it, he said it was a bobcat.

Okay. Because there were people out there saying this could just be a large house cat. But based on the reaction of these people, I don't see how you would react to a large house cat in this manner. The sound it makes and the size of it, it's clearly not a house cat. I agree. Can I say something that I didn't notice originally? So this is clearly in the morning, right? Yeah.

He had had his coffee. He set his coffee down on the hood of his vehicle. Dude. So this guy did all this before he had had his coffee. Yeah, that's way too big to be a regular house cat. Dude, and so this guy keeps the Thule on him. This dude was packing some morning heat. He killed the thing.

As many of us are. It took me hours. It took me many views before I realized that he took a gun off of his belt clip and decided to. Wait, he did? Yes. Dude, he's holding. He's strapped up right now? Also rocking some boots with shorts. Yeah, you can't see the gun because he's wearing an oversized North Face fleece that he looks like he found on a sorority girl's floor. That's a fake North Face.

Yeah, that's definitely fake. Oh, I didn't realize he killed. That's like his company bought the Academy brand, the Dylan brand. I knew that he shot him. I didn't know that he was packing in the video. It's hilarious. I'm sorry. I never want, like, I would never think it was funny if, like, Sally got attacked by

a bobcat between our cars. But the way that everyone reacts to this is just gold. Yeah. You see how he just pulled out a gun there? Oh, wow. Yeah, he pulls out a just pulled out a gun there? Oh, wow. Yeah, he pulls out a gun in his neighborhood. I'm just seeing that. Before you get sad, some people are like, why'd you kill the bobcat?

Apparently it was rabid. I haven't seen confirmation of that. I thought it was a bobcat. It's a rabid? Rabid, Will. I think it... You want to? No, I'm not going to.

Has it been confirmed? I know that there's speculation that it has rabies, but I don't know if it's been confirmed yet. Let me look it up on the science factory. Do you know the process of checking an animal for rabies, by the way? I always just assumed that if they had a bunch of foam coming out of their mouth that they had rabies, because that's what you were told as a kid. They have to completely sever the head to test it. What?

I'm pretty sure. There's someone who's been married to and has dated tech vets in the past. Vet techs. Tech vet? Vet techs. Like if there's a dog vet. Sounds like some kind of new place that's going to happen in Austin that robots check out your dog.

It's just a bunch of dudes sad about Chris Beard leaving. I'm pretty sure they've got to cut the head off. We appreciate your service. Guns up. What's he carrying? Is he carrying a plate of brownies? He's got something for the potluck.

His fit is all-time in this. He's wearing a pair of old man shoes with socks that go up to his mid-shins. Scrunch game, not good. I don't see a lot of scrunch there. intern reagan and then uh king of scrunch throwing the cat is the move that i didn't totally understand after after like holding the cat up and just like just stone cold in his face shit talking it i would have tried to isolate the cat somewhere before i tried to throw it like if i have it in my hands and it's not biting me and I can actually put it somewhere, I might have thought to just throw it in the car and just shut the car.

It's going to ruin the inside of your car. Yeah. But at least it guarantees- Then you got a bobcat in your car. Yeah, but then it guarantees that you're not getting bit in the neck. All right. The animal should be euthanized and its head removed and shipped under refrigeration for examination by a qualified laboratory.

They test the brain tissue. Refrigeration, no heating? If the biting animal is stray or unwanted, it should either be confined. Okay, the rest of it's unimportant. But, yeah. They have to take its head off. Crazy, right? Take the top off.

Pop top. Damn. How do you know this? I need to explain. So, if I thought you had rabies right now, I'd have to cut your head off and then figure it out? Well, I think there are ways of dealing with it. If a human has it. Do we know if this thing was rabid?

I mean, like I'm seeing speculation. I know you asked this earlier. I don't know for sure, no. I think it takes a little bit to test. It's impossible to know. The funniest is a compilation of people being like, why did he throw the cat? He should have taken it to a rescue center. Well, the cat attacked him on multiple, his wife.

A rescue center? Nah. What was he supposed to do? You can't attack someone's family and then be like, oh, rescue me. If a big cat comes after a bear, it's got to get got. Why didn't he have a train guard on him? I don't know if he busted a toolie out to let it sing into that thing. I don't keep a toolie on me.

I would have tried to scare it away. Shooting the cat was probably the most humane way that it could have gone, because otherwise you would have had to have killed it in a less humane way. He held it up like Simba. Yeah. That part was kind of funny. He goes, there's a bobcat! He mashed that Rafiki button.

There's a bobcat! Hey, hey! Hey, the bobcat! I'm going to kill him, motherfucker! He did. Although we don to kill him, motherfucker. He did. Although we don't have video of that. Do we have Dylan on record saying how he would fare against a bobcat? Probably.

You could easily handle a bobcat. You could. They weigh like 30 pounds. Yeah, they're small cats. If you get got by a bobcat, you probably didn't put up much of a fight. You're probably four years old, too. Let me say this. I don't want, if I have the chance to avoid the smoke with the bobcat,

I don't want it because I'm going to get scratched up. That's fair. I don't want those cat scratches. Cat scratch fever. Dude, they got all that bacteria. You hear about the cat bite? What? If a cat bites you, their mouths are just loaded with bacteria.

Really? It's really easy to get infected, and it can cause major problems. Yeah. Unlike a dog in that regard. A dog bites you, it's just tight. Right. If a dog bites me, it's probably because I did something fucked up. Yeah.

I tried to get your ball. I respect that dog. I'm sorry for getting your ball. It'll pop its head off, man. Think about it. Yeah, you've got to get past that. It's weird. I mean, yeah.

There's got to be a better way. That's what I'm saying. If you're a human and you get bit by a rabies-infected animal, don't they have to do the shots? We've covered this. In the stomach? I don't know. You should know, Mr. Vet Guy.

You've dated a lot of vet techs. I was married to one and dated another one. Let's all calm down. More than us. Armchair expert over here. I know some things. Can I start taking Rosie to you instead of taking her to the vet? Please don't.

I don't know what to do. Unless she has rabies. I don't know what to do. I fuck with my vet too heavy at this point. I have to ride with him forever. We have the same vet. Shout out to Dr. Rob. He's tight, man.

He's our guy. Yeah. This video's wild, dude. I don't have much more on the vid. It's crazy how the dude, before he goes after the cat, like, he runs back to his coffee and takes a big sip. And he's like, all right, now it's— I'm ready to fucking jog. Now I'm ready.

Now I'm ready. This jogger just shows up, or whatever person. Like, they're going to help. Yeah, if I'm the person—if I'm the neighbor who's going to go help, I'm ready. No, I'm ready. This jogger just shows up or whatever person. They're going to help. Yeah, if I'm the person, if I'm the neighbor who's going to go help, I'm not chasing that cat. I'm running. I'm stepping away from the situation. It's just a bobcat, man. You could step in.

If you saw that happening, you would do something. At least go stand in the yard and pretend to be supportive of what's going on. I don't help that neighbor. Oh, no. No, the pretend support is 100% the route that I'm taking here. It's like, oh. You know what they say to do. Oh, what can I do?

I might make some noises like trying to lure it my way, but those noises are not going to be loud enough What noise would you make? Come here. Come here. Come here.

Come here. So I'm reading this what to do from experts if you encounter a bobcat in the wild or at your home. This is from science.com. It says, turn around, don't meow. Really?

Interesting. I'd probably kick it, honestly. Kicking is the move in these situations. They say that's what you're supposed to do when dogs are attacking each other. I'd line that thing up for a 45-yard field goal. I think so. Better than what my neighbor said to do. Well, you can't, but you shouldn't put your arm in because they could just latch on.

Yeah, kick it. Go ahead and stun it. Yeah, it surprises them. I had a neighbor tell me that if there's dogs fighting and you can't get one of the dogs off of the other dog, he told me this, throw a finger in its butt and it will just immediately stop whatever it's doing, which I'm like, yes, probably another way.

You're going to slide a digit in the keister? I don't really like it. There's got to be a digit in the keister? I don't really. There's got to be a better way. What kind of accuracy do you have to have when those dogs are fighting? Do you have to lift the tail? What if it's got a big – It's a bullseye every time. He's like, grab its balls or just –

Straight up, I'm not doing that. My dog doesn't have balls. What if your dog doesn't have balls? Yeah, so you've got to go straight for the keister. Yeah, I'm not trying to – It's a Trump thing. Sorry. What if your dog's throwing that ass in a circle when it's fighting

and you can't actually get there? You play too much, dog. Yeah, Bobcat, man. Dude, I felt bad for our friend Landry, Luca Donthick, on Twitter. Why? Because he tore his ACL and he was at a wedding and he couldn't even throw it in a circle. It's tough.

I saw that tweet. He couldn't do throw it in a circle. It was tough. I saw that tweet. He couldn't do the quant? Couldn't do any of it. Like, that ass just stayed solitary. I had hernia surgery before, like, a big party. It was like everyone was coming home from college for the summer and we were throwing a giant party. And I couldn't really move from the chair that I was in,

but I was dedicated to the games because I just wanted to hang with the boys. And it was just tough not being able to throw my ass in a circle with the squad. Yeah, they've come to expect that from you. Shout out to my inguinal hernia, though. Can't wait to revisit that someday when the mesh disappears. You have the mesh? I have the mesh, David. You want to feel?

You can feel the mesh. You can feel. Feel it, dude. Manscaped.com down there. Is it that far down? I don't know where it is. Where's it at relative to your crank? It would be at the, like, 2 o'clock. If my crank is the hands of the clock.

Yeah, we get it, I think. 6 o'clock. Got to be careful there. Any other hernia boys in the room? No, man. I think about it. You always hear about the sports hernia. Why don't you just tell people it was a sports hernia?

It's probably better. Because they know better than to believe that. Yeah, that's fair. I think about it. If I ever lift heavy weights, I i'm like if i strain too much am i going to get the hernia thing i don't know how that works weirdly enough i actually got the hernia from i actually started lifting weights that semester and i could tell that something bad was happening and then i really injured it at a formal throwing that ass in a circle

i wasn't actually throwing my ass in a circle but i was dancing and that's where i was like oh something went very wrong last night daggery i wasn't dagger that's ass in a circle, but I was dancing. And that's where I was like, ooh, something went very wrong last night. Were you daggering? I wasn't daggering. That's a dangerous dance floor. But I was tearing the dance floor out that night. And I woke up the next day and thought, yep, I think I need to tell my professor in my workout class that I can't do this anymore. That was one of those classes that you just toss on the schedule that year just to really hammer it out.

I think I tweaked my meniscus hitting a stanky leg. Really? Mm-hmm. I'm sorry. Yeah, dudeiscus hitting a stanky leg. Really? Mm-hmm. I'm sorry. Yeah, dude. It was a rough two weeks. But if that's, you know, if GS Boys comes on, you know where you can find me. Middle of the dance floor, just throwing it.

I wish I saved the live from your wedding. Really glad you didn't. Yeah, it's probably better. Still, I was legit, like, not mad at you, but I was like, that's sorry. No, dude, it was great. It was a you but I was like that's sorry No dude it was great It was a good live I just remember looking up from like The joy of the

Reception and like everybody's out there Trying to dance I look up and it's just Will on the side Phone out clearly recording me He's a content guy You hired me to come down here and do content. You invited content guys to the wedding. I invited you to the wedding.

I was hungover at the wedding, so I didn't have the might to dance at that point. I hit my stride at about 11 p.m. that night. It was three seconds of you deflating me, and then I was like, yeah, moved on. I was just down the street at a different wedding. Literally at the same venue. Yeah. People forget about that. It's weird looking back on that, because I don't really talk to him anymore. on i was just down the street at a different way literally at the same venue yeah people forget about it's weird looking back on that because i don't really talk to him anymore and you're like you know some people came down for both just saying yeah people weren't throwing it in a

circle with his no no no circles not being done He'll be on my golf trip, though. I'll bust his balls for you. Can I join your fantasy league? Do you want to, honestly? I've been floating. Actually, no. You don't want to be in. No. I've been floating.

I've been teasing Sally that I'm going to join a fantasy league with all your boys and just go to Hilton Head and shit. Why don't we do our own? How many patrons? What's the Patreon tier to be in our fantasy league? Oh. I don't know, man. $5,000.

We donate all of it to charity of our choosing. I think that's fair. Bobcats, rabid bobcats of America. Do you know what you should bring on your trip for your Fantasy Drive? You should bring some poncho outdoors gear. I thought this might be transitioning. That's going to play well. After you pop top on the course and you're done,

you can go back to the place. You just toss on one of those and just go walk to the beach. Our friend Flounder was putting on a clinic over the weekend. Dude, he was putting on a clinic all last weekend. Unbelievable. What is he doing? He's just fishing right now. How do you just leave and go to a fishing tournament? Because he's a poncho outdoors guy. I should know this.

I've known him my entire life and I don't know. Anyone can enter a fishing tournament, right? You've got to have a bow. Well, his name is Flounder. I mean, it kind of makes sense for you to be there. That's fair. God. I actually have a shirt from poncho that I've been begging to wear lately.

Why don't you throw it on? I got a crisp white. I don't know. I actually need to find the name of this shirt. It's just called the Salty Dog, which is actually a great drink, too. Wow. It's crisp and white. The reason I haven't put it on yet for the boys is because I need my tan to get a little

more pop in. Because I want to unveil this. It's worthy of an unveiling. So I need to get like the crisp, you know, tan skin. It's going to pop so hard with this white. I can't wait for the unveiling. They have different styles of the shirts, which is an amazing thing. They have the original, the western, the flannel.

They've got it all. Dave's been wearing that poncho hat a lot lately uh he's not wearing it today unfortunately but it's it's it's jarring to see you in something different where the poncho i'm glad you brought that up because i was about to say i'm approaching i'm actually there i'm at the point to where when i go to grab a hat i always go for the poncho hat and And then I always have that moment. I'm like, am I overdoing the poncho hat? You're not. I love the hat. You have the carp dad hat. You also have the Navy agave hat.

Well, it's my everything hat. I like the carp dad hat. I might need to actually, if you buy a shirt from them right now and use code circling bag at checkout, you can get a free hat or t-shirt with your order. If you're like me and you have just an average size head, it's perfect. And even I've seen it on people who have just hilariously large heads like Dylan. And it even looks good on people like that. Wow. Thank you.

It means a lot. Go to ponchooutdoors.com. Use promo code circling back at checkout and get a free hat or t-shirt when you order any outdoor shirt. You can pick any hat or t-shirt that you want. Then you add it to the cart and then use the code at checkout to make the hat or shirt free. So you have to add it to the cart, then use Circling

Back at checkout and then it's free. That's a great deal. You got the little magnet buttons on the chest pockets. Sick. It's a nice touch. Love that. He's going to trademark that. He should. And we're going to start getting charged. I think he should. That's ponchooutdoors.com

Code circling back at checkout to get a free hat or t-shirt with your order. You guys hear about this McConaughey feller? Is he actually going to get the governor seat? Dylan was at a shower at his house apparently over the weekend. He could have been at his house, man. Sheesh.

He was put on a clinic, by the way, at the Austin FC game. Yeah, he was. His outfit was ridiculous. Did I see that Will Ferrell was also there? Yeah. They have a rivalry. Weren't you at the game?

You were at the USC game. No. You weren't? No, I was at the Bama one. They have their little rivalry between LA and Austin. A lot of people say that Austin's getting California'd, though. Do they have a rivalry? I don't think they do.

You know, Austin's getting California'd, though. Do they have a rivalry? I don't think they do. Of course, McConaughey and Farrell did the famous pregame hype video before that national championship. Remember that one? It was like, oh, I've got a Heisman in my ear. I've got two Heismans in my ear. I think that probably meant a lot more to you than it did to me.

That's a funny video. I was like, I could barely even form memories at the time of that game. People know what I'm talking about. Because you're so blazed. I was just young. It was a good time. It was a good time. Good stuff.

Are we actually going to have McConaughey for governor? No. He is doing quite well on the favorability polls. Much better than the current governor. Does that mean anything? Is the poll that came out it does it actually is that actually going to happen or is it just one of those random are people surprised that um the award oscar-winning actor who has spanned two decades of being an alice celeb at least two

decades um and has never dabbled in politics has a better favorability rating than a sitting governor. Yeah, who would have thought? That shouldn't be a shocker. I mean, this isn't unprecedented. We have the governator. That's true. Jesse Ventura. Is that his name?

It's a body. Yeah. I mean, Dave, he's been going for 30 years at this point. It's 1991. Yeah, if you're crazy popular, even if you're not a politician, you're going to get votes because people don't care about politics. Well, and like that'll go obviously as he starts to if he does this, which I don't know why he would articulate like a platform and, you know, has to actually start campaigning and telling people what he's about. It's going to go down because, you know, it's a very polarized world we live in.

Polarized state. Sure. I hope this doesn't happen a because it would be he would regret regret it you you can't it dude you you're living the life like you what you're doing right now is everything like he could go hop in a airstream and go drive out to marfa and and take mushrooms and write a book about it or some shit. And it's fine. And then he could do one movie a year. He's set financially. He does not need this stress.

This is just the general conversation of why any celebrity would ever want to go into government after being a celebrity for so long. He could retire right now and never work a day in his life ever again and live a stress-free life in Texas Hill country. He's such a champion for the state of Texas that he feels like it's kind of his – I don't know. He's kind of quirky, you know? I could see him being like, I want to do something good for the state and like actually – Why not just hit the campaign trail if someone's actually qualified to go do it? Just be the guy. Because he has a better chance of getting elected than an actual politician running under the same policy?

I wonder if he's ever backed. Dave's like ability ranking could be high. No. I wouldn't vote for Dave. No, I wouldn't either. He's got a mustache, though. Oh, yeah. Good point.

You could have your town halls. You could have people come up and be like, I mustache you a question. Dude, that's good. That's a good bit, dude. Dude, that's good. I love McConaughey. I don't love this move from McConaughey. Do you know how insufferable?

So let's just say it's him. Assuming he runs as a Democrat. So it's him versus Greg Abbott and a general. Greg Abbott, of course. Who's the general? Okay. The Dispatch song? Stop referencing Dispatch.

It's twice in like two weeks. The amount of references to old classic McConaughey lines is going to be insufferable. Greg Abbott, I think, will be like, I got to say, I've looked at your platform and it's not all right, all right, all right. I was going to say, are they going to have... Am I right? Are the yard signs for McConaughey going to be like, let's make Texas all right, all right, all right again? Like, I don't want that.

That's a lot of characters. Should we just start making that shirt, actually, and just beat him to it? He's going to have signs that just say, just keep living. That's the name of his foundation, right? Just keep living. We should make one that says, just keep simping. That's our... Did McConaughey, did he entertain maybe trying to go to Cabo during the freeze or anything?

Where was he during the freeze? Have people talked about that? I don't know where he was during the freeze. He had to go drop his kids off at Cabo or Cancun and then turn right back around. He was just escorting them on a plane. His wife wanted a bottle of mezcal, so he went to... That's just the only way she can go to Mexico. And so he went to Mexico and got her some

and then came back. What a flex that would be. How long until McConaughey's skateboarding across the stage and doing push-ups? No, he learned. No, that's... How serious is he about this? I'm worried that he's very serious, Dylan. We're going to be voting for him at some point.

It's going to be sad. You know what, though? If it means he's no longer on the sideline of Longhorn sporting events, then I think it's a win for all of us. What's his title? For the FC? No, no, no. For UT.

Minister of Culture. Minister of Culture. That's right. Is he not that for Austin FC, too? He's something with Austin FC. I could be wrong. I think he might be part of the ownership group in a way. I could be wrong on that.

Okay, while you think – Is that a conflict? While you think that's like corny for him to do, imagine if you're like an 18-year-old kid that gets recruited by Texas and you're sitting next to Matthew McConaughey on the bench. I totally agree. How tight is that? In college, you need to use your celebrity status like as much as humanly possible,

so I get it. But at the same time, it's like – That figures into your decision. Do the kids even care about... Do 18-year-olds... 18-year-olds, they really care about McConaughey? I was watching The Circle

last night on Netflix and some girl didn't know who NSYNC was. Dude, McConaughey is A-list. It's NSYNC! He is the Minister of Culture for Austin FC. He's A-list, man.

What was Fred Hull for the Stars? The Ambassador of Fun, Will. The Ambassador of Fun. Which is a sick title if you can get it. Minister of Culture is a dope title. Is he an actual minister? Of culture. He just do a quick class on the internet?

He's just a hype guy. It's so funny. Does that mean he's always just utilizing his STEM degree and culturing bacteria for the science factory? It might be. Dude, any chance to wear that burnt orange leather coat? That's a dope coat. I'll give you that. Yeah, but is it dope when it's 105 degrees outside

and you're getting your ass kicked by LSU? He's McConaughey, dude. I know. I just wonder how much it resonates with the kids. Texas played LSU pretty tough. Yeah, and they would have been much more in it the entire game if Tom Herman didn't go for it twice on fourth down in the first quarter. Fucking Tom.

What's he doing? Come on! Got his head in the clouds. No, I'm not going to do what I was going to do. Wow, David just finished his coffee. Now you're ready to talk? Can you talk now? You ready to start this podcast?

Let's go. All right, we going to record? Question. No, that's going to go down a different road. I don't want to go ask you go down the road i was gonna ask uh every road has its turn i don't follow the the numbers on the on the coronavirus the ongoing global pandemic in texas specifically but it seems like there has not been a massive spike i'm wondering at what point does the governor get credit for that, for opening it back up, saying do whatever, leaving it up to businesses. I'm wondering if he will get – I'm not saying he should.

I don't know. Maybe the numbers are being altered. I have no proof of that. I'm just wondering. The COVID rates in the Northeast are skyrocketing right now, and the ones down here are not. So it makes you wonder. Were you on fax machine?

Is it the warmer weather maybe, bringing people more getting the vitamin d taking it all in dude people getting people are getting a lot of d they be careful man we're liberal cucks on this podcast you need to keep that in mind we need to be able to criticize the texas governor that's a republican i know and i'm just i'm trying to be trying to be uh i'm trying to give both sides my peace of mind right somebody just broke into my car love that car alarm what is mcconaughey run as independent probably is it my car my my clubs are in my car fuck it's not my car. I'm joking. I know. I know. Sheesh. There he goes. About time. Just had to make sure.

My club threw my car too. Was that a sign? Was that an alarm like saying, Dave, don't go down this political road? I think it was. It was like, no. We had someone back out of our tee time on Saturday because his clubs got stolen the day before. Tough scene. Who was it?

Tough scene. Do I know him? No. If my clubs got stolen, i don't think i'd buy new ones like that's it that's a sign i'm done renting yeah oh wow you call chad you're like hey um what's up dude uh is that connect over there again callaway i know dude perfect's got some some clubs that they're not using just laying around the fun factory 100 oh yeah did you see they had a nerf gun That like shoots curved darts

Or some shit Yeah What is that? Really? You can go around the corners? Not like a It's not like a 90 degree turn But it can bend

Yeah it bends Like Beckham Really? You know who that is? Moves like Jagger No Shouts to Inter Miami Okay

Should we move on to our next segment? Why aren't we Where's Brett? Why don't we not have a Nerve sponsorship? Why is Dude Perfect so much cooler than we are? They are. It's unfortunate. It's upsetting.

Maybe it's because they just kill it. Dude, they're so hyped over everything. I'm jealous. I hate everything. Their energy. I need it. You need it the most out of anybody. Oh, stop it.

I'm Dylan Chivary, and this is the Donut Hole Punt. Let's go. Let's go. What a fucking terrible bit that was. It really didn't. Yeah, it was bad. I don't know. I think I did pretty well.

It did, but just Dylan's performance mainly. Although when you threw the donut hole, it was very impressive. I threw it 600 yards. Someone came at how I punted my donut hole when I did one, and I was like, is there a trademark way to punt a donut hole? Dude, people will bitch about anything. Yeah, I was like, dude, I don't think there's a specific way to get the most distance

out of your donut hole. We should have double glazed those things. They could have gone twice the distance. A little double glaze. That's what they call Dylan. I knew that. His eyes are so glazed over because he's high. He's been smoking pot. Smoking weed. Dude, tomorrow's 420.

Oh, shit. Let's go. Should we do a podcast from the Zen Den? Should we do only weed stories on Worst of Tomorrow? Let's just get ripped tomorrow. Aren't y'all trying to induce tomorrow? If there's one thing Sally will not let happen, it's us having our kid on 420. You're going to be 420 adjacent, though.

What does that mean? You're going to be in the ballpark. Yeah, for sure. You flirted with 420. We did. We did. But we have to call it Wilmon if he comes out on 420. Trillmon?

That would be my nickname. What's your nickname for Will's unborn child whose gender is not revealed? You don't even know. I don't know. Move on, Will. Thanks, Dylan. I think it's time we bring in our special guest for him today. You guys might know him as Randy.

We know him as human. Oh, we moved the mic over there and everything. Randy moved the mic over. This is legit. Wow. You see how he does it when it's over here. He has to do a squat. He does the hover. It's awkward. It's like he's pooping in an airport. Look at this. Hey, Randy. Wow. You see how he does it when it's over here. He has to do a squat. He does the hover.

It's awkward. It's like he's pooping in an airport. Very cool, Randy. Look at this. Hey, Randy, welcome. Welcome to me. Do you want to talk about what we're supposed to talk about right now? You're just welcome to the show.

Thank you, Randy. Thank you for welcoming me to my own show. You're welcome. Randy. What's this about, man? What were you going to do? You were hanging out last night thinking about doing some stuff. Do you mind telling the people what you were thinking about doing last night?

Yeah, I was in my bed at midnight. I was like, you know what? I think I might need to make my dating profiles. And then I realized it was midnight. Randy was horny last night. Oh, yeah, he horny. How horny were you? No, no.

Randy was just thinking. He was sitting there. He's like, you know what? Watching this movie would be a lot nicer if I had a little honey next to me. And I respect that. I bet. He wants the companionship. He wants his little queso girl.

My little whiskey girl. Your little oatmeal girl. Your little Vizzy girl. Ooh, I like little Vizzy girl. That might work. It kind of flows, too. Randy, can you, for the olds in the room, mainly the people sitting at this table right now,

can you explain what apps, like if one of us were to be single now and we need to join an app, like what's the hot app that the kids are using to date? Apparently Hinge. Apparently that's the one. Hinge was always the third tier for me when I was younger. Times have changed.

Bumble was one. Tinder was two. Because Tinder started getting bots and stuff. And then Hinge was three. The way I always thought of it is Hinge is for if you're actually looking to date somebody. Okay. And Bumble is kind of in between, maybe a casual thing. Tinder's like a hookup app, I think.

Tinder's for the horny boys. Which one had the bots? What? Tinder. In my time. And keep in mind, this was eight years ago. Wouldn't that be kind of sick to date a robot, just to say you did? I don't know.

You get done hooking up, and they're just like... It's like the Jake Paul robot. Falls them around or whatever. Are you guys talking about Jake Paul and Too Much too much dip today i think we have to good i hope you do you can be on it you are gonna be on it oh we're talking soccer football mate so randy did you end up making a profile last night no no i got to uh i got to where i put my name in and then realized I have to be up in the morning, so I went to sleep instead. So we're there.

The app's been downloaded. Didn't really take much to make you give up. Yeah. Have you decided on a lead-off pick yet? Yeah, do you have anything, the leader in the clubhouse for what you're going to do? The lead-off picks are the most important one. I can think of one. Are you going to do any group picks?

Well, of course, you have, because if you don't do group picks, it looks like you don't have friends. But you can't do all group picks, because then people have to... Is there a single picture of us with you? Have we taken a group pic together? The Christmas card. They're going to be like, why does this guy have three dads? Are you going to use us for clout?

Of course, yeah. Either the Christmas card or the spooky season where we're all in our costumes. I might throw that on there. Is there like a bit? People always want to date a hot dog. Yeah. Yeah. I was going to say, is there like a certain bit maybe you might utilize for said profile?

No, but I probably will use my 69th Instagram post because I'm looking pretty jacked in that one. You were looking good in that. Your arms, they weren't perfectly tiny, unfortunately. A little big for my liking. Yeah, there was a time in life when your arms would be desirable to people. Are you going to use your bodacious booty pic? No, I will not because it's just a picture of my ass and that could be anyone. You want to save the booty for like date one where they see you like going to the bathroom for the first time and they're like, oh, everything is cake.

Yeah, going to do no back picks or side picks, all front picks, and then, boom, hit them with the booty. If I'm Randy, I'm dressing McConaughey everywhere I go, tucked in T. Questionable boot jeans. The part about your occupation, your job, what are you going to put? What is my title? Yeah, do you have an official title at Wash Media? I think I'm the director of video operations.

We can make it sound doper than it really is. I mean, that's a pretty dope title. Director of video operations? Yeah. For Wash Media? It was going to be video operations, and then Dave said, you know, I'm going to hit you with that director. That sounds tight until they Google Wash Media.

Like, what is this? Oh, they've got two full-time employees yeah cool either way still though getting a lot of impressions on instagram reels director of reels you call yourself the real The real one Deal But yeah Awkward laughter I'm gonna get on these dating apps Because

I got another question People are mobbing Another question What's your age range? Oh We're getting down to the nitty gritty Better answer this correct Alright this is

Remind us how old you are currently I am 27 But as of two weeks ago You guys wouldn't have known it was my birthday. But anyways. Right, right, right. So- You're always 24 to me. I went out on Friday.

What if you're in Indianapolis? And we were taking this guy out on his 21st birthday. One of my roommate's fire cadet classmates. Went out on dirty. I can't hang with these kids anymore. They're too young. So 23 will be the youngest. They either have to be here back in college or grad school.

I can't date any students. 23 to what? 29. Okay. My only issue with that is that nobody likes you when you're 23. It's true. Okay, maybe 24. All right.

It's interesting that you could take a selfie from your bed with them and say that's 23 and me. That's pretty good. Yeah, I find it interesting that a guy's range and age always goes younger and a girl's range typically will go higher. That's because guys are scumbags, Dylan. Girls like a more mature guy. Literally, they know they're just getting the scumbag.

It's unfortunate. Yeah, we're all, yeah. Well, if they like a more mature guy Then I am going to be single For the rest of my life My age range When I was on dating apps Was just my age

That was it You had to be the exact same age as me Oh really On Hint It also gives you An option that says Is this a deal breaker Like for the ages

And if you select no Then they'll just Spit every age at you I don't hate that Yeah I don't hate that. Yeah. I don't hate that at all. Age ain't nothing but a number. I actually came up with that phrase myself.

That's pretty good. You know, you're only as old as you feel. Or something. You know, I ain't as good as I once was. After golf the other day, how'd you feel? Mentally, I'm 32. Okay. That's how I feel.

I feel like I'm a perfect 32-year-old in my head. My body? I got back problems. Can't dunk anymore. We know that. We certainly know that. Yeah. We've seen the video. How does Hinge work on like a bio?

How many characters do you get to like say a little something fun about yourself? Or do you? No clue. I think there's a questionnaire, and then you can pick what questions you want to answer and then there are prompts basically yeah i think um when you match your people you have to respond to one of those prompts i think that's how it works based on what you've said and what i think you're looking for uh a few things i would absolutely include um you're into pizza queso tacos chocolate tacos red wine oh they're gonna find that's a lie and uh at a party you can find me petting the dog in the corner oh did they all do that hey can i borrow randy it's so lame you're talking about my dog

yes that's gonna give me so many more impressions you a dog pic. No, but if it's not your dog, they're going to know immediately. You could call yourself a dog uncle. That's fun and easy. Oh, man. I'm a dunkle. Recently became a dunkle. Drop in this glow-up pic you have. Your 2009 to 2019 one.

With the brown leather jacket? I can't fit in that thing anymore. Dude. Why? Because your arms aren't perfectly tiny anymore? I actually took that picture at the awesome meetup. Yeah. M-E-E-T or M-E-A-T?

I don't know. We'll figure it out. Keep an eye out. Do a Brett for you. I would love a meetup right now. Let us know when you're live, man. I will. What are we going to do? I'm excited for you. If you match with any girls when we have a meetup on the docket, will you invite them to the meetup?

Wow, that would be right into the lion's den, huh? It could be like the Frasier episode, and Frasier has like three dates all at once. You guys watch that one? It's a knee slapper. Randy, you're just one of you in the river drinking a beer. You look pretty ripped in it. Plus, the juxtaposition next to your friends who are not as good a shape.

Oh, well, one of those rides is my roommate who listens. What? Well. I'm just saying. Fitbod.me. That's kind of a Dylan move. No, it's not. I don't think that's a beer.

I think it's a seltzer that we do not speak of anymore. Okay. Way to go, Randy. Can you Photoshop it? Maybe I will. Sorry to Randy's – what's his name jason sorry jason he was he wanted to get in a uh benching competition with you oh that's the one that's right is he j dog yeah randy used to play on his roommate's xbox account and i would always get invites from j dog

like 994 and i'll be like dude who's j and it'd be randy like hey who's J-D-R-A-N-D-E? But hey, it's me. I'm like, oh, I forgot. J-Dawg. What's his name now? Wacky Trumbacky. No, that was actually my old gamer tag, which is interesting that you guys call me that. I'm pretty sure you told us about that. It's not that hard. Or you told us the nickname.

What is it now? Randaconda999. Oh, Jesus, dude. What's the implication there? He's a subtle guy. If that was your name on, like, Hinge or something, I'd be a little scared. You need to put that in your bio.

Username. Randaconda. Randaconda. It was my Discord name, too. Okay. Very cool. Anything else you want to say to the people at home? Just keep an eye out.

Keep an eye out on the dating apps. Keep an eye out on the dating apps. Keep an eye out on the dating apps. What's your flirtiest fit? That's a good question. I got to think I go Henley. I got to think the 69 pick, the 69th post pick. Thank you for clarifying that it's the 69th post pick and not just a pick of, you know.

Dude, no one's doing 69, like, celebratory picks like this. It's Randy doing stand-up 69. Or maybe Cuts Clothing. That's called added value. You do look great in Cuts shirts. I might be getting a new one. We'll see. You should do a photo of you doing the Jake Paul warm-up, pre-fight warm-up.

The yoga pose? Yoga with one of us, Dylan probably. Can those legs support me? Hard to say. That's a great point. Hard to say. Do it with Micah. Yeah.

One wrong move, though. He's putting you through the ceiling. Well, Randy, good luck on your endeavors. We wish you the best. Thank you. I hope she listens to this, bro. Good luck on your endeavors. We wish you the best.

Thank you. I hope she listens to this, bro. You have, I guess, six months to find a date for a Christmas party. Or, no. How many months? Dude, I don't do math. Eight. Eight months. I already did math earlier in this episode.

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So I downloaded this. We got a free trial because we're sponsored by them. And I've decided that I'm going to brush up on my Espanol. Are you aware of this? That's very smart. Si. That means yes in Spanish. The lessons are actually really fun.

It kind of took me back. Excelente. Si. Fun fact, I've kind of been brushing up on my Italian. Really? Fa bene. Prego. I'd love to go back to Fidanzi.

Prego. You should hear me at home. I'm just putting on a clinic. Just trying out different accents and stuff, different emphasis. It's a lot of fun. Babbel makes it easy. Well, they're 15-minute lessons to make a perfect way to learn a new language on the go. They design courses with practical real-world conversations in mind

and things that you'll use in everyday life. The one that I did, it was like a bunch of different words, and you had to select it within the conversation context that you were having with the actual app. You had to select which word you wanted to go with. And it got a little hard. I actually got one wrong, unfortunately. Good to be me. But that's why we're learning. So we can be

efficient in real life. IRL. With Babbel, you can choose from 14 different languages including Spanish, French, Italian, and German. What are you going to learn, Dylan? Are you going to brush up on your Spanish or are you going down a new path? Español since that's the, you know, I attempted before to learn Español.

So I already have a basis of what to expect in my head. Something like Mandarin or like Russian, like it's just like the letters are different you know so it's like you got to learn that's right all kinds of master spanish and then we'll get you on that mandarin right i'm i sound good point making i'm not going to try mandarin well i'm a little disappointed you didn't do dothraki i thought about it as much as you enjoyed the wedding the weddings are just too lit dude they have dothraki on here sure i need to learn that so if i'm ever at a dothraki wedding i can be like no no no everything, no, no, everything's cool.

I'm cool. You're cool. We're cool. You're not going to go to a Dothraki wedding. I don't know. I'm like, I might have won. Right now, when you purchase a three-month Babbel subscription, you can get an additional three months for free.

That's six months for the price of three. Just go to Babbel.com. Use promo code STEAM. That's B-A-B-B-E-L.com slash STEAM for an extra three months free. Babbel, language for life. Well, Brett's out. He's up in the togs. Major shouts to the togs.

Big ups to the togs. Shout out to Brett. Shout out to Dave. Big shouts to Dave. Shout out to the whole squad. The original Dave. Original D-Man, as people call him. You guys want Will's breaking news?

Yes. A little choose your adventure. We have Blink-182. Country music or watched media? Ooh. Let's go to watched media. These are like all under the same umbrella. True.

No, they're not. You want watched media? Let's go to watched media, Dylan. Sure. We're on baby watch. There's a possibility that I'm not on every episode this week. Yep. Yep.

I hope I am. We'll step up. I hope I am on every episode this week, but there's a very good possibility that your boy will be out for a little bit, and I'm sorry about that. I have to tend to my child. Yeah. Can I share something else under the WASH Media category? Are you going to tease something? This is what you do.

You tease. What is this, Dylan? I'm going to start writing a monthly Inside Watch Media editorial that will be available on Patreon. The $5 backer tier. Just gives you a look behind the curtain of what goes on here, basically. I know a lot of people are interested in that kind of thing. And this will give you a chance to read about it. Is it going to have a theme song that's like, welcome to the Inside Watch Media podcast? Well, it's going to be an editorial, so no, it won't have a fucking intro song, you dumbass.

Oh, okay. I mean, it could. It really could. Anyway. I'd be sick if it did. Just something for the kids to enjoy. We can go on and edit. No one's doing mixed media editorial.

Yeah, you don't see that. You guys want Blink-182 or country music? Ooh. Country music. Yeah, say the best for last. A big, big shout to the Yeah, say the best for last. A big, big shout to the Entertainer of the Year from last night's AMC Awards. You guys ever heard of Luke Bryan?

He's got two first names. He won Entertainer of the Year. As far as entertainers go, he was the most entertaining. Wow, from his cowboy boots to his down-home roots. That guy stinks. No, he's an entertainer of the year. He stinks.

His music is terrible. I could see you being in a Luke Bryan show. No. I could see Bay dragging you to one and you enjoying it. I think it's bullshit. Bay would never do that. I think it's bullshit. There were no female nominees up for entertainer of the year.

Doesn't that seem a little messed up? Did John Party pass on the nominee or something? We're trying to gas up our country queens, Dylan. They did note that women did own the night. But, I mean, come on. Luke Bryan. You really don't want Luke Bryan? That stinks.

Maren Morris, is she in that ballpark? I think she won a couple things last night, Dave. She did that one song about doing a Peloton side to side. Hands to myself. She got two honors, including Song of the Year. That's big. Okay, that's a big award. Miranda Lambert performed three times and held onto her record

as the most decorated winner in ACM history. Did they do it in person? I feel like they did. I wasn't watching. It just wasn't in my rotation last night. Did Luke Bryan perform on a dirt road? God, I think he did. Hard to say.

Can we do real or fake Luke Bryan songs next time? Lewis Hamilton had a little gravel on the tires. Wow. An F1 guy. More on that? I don't know if you guys know about that. You guys want to hear about the Bleak 182 news? I thought you'd never ask. Travis Barker is horny horny on the TL lately. You guys see this? So he's dating

Kourtney Kardashian. Don't say he's not hot. He's putting ass pic. Who thinks he's hot? Dude, he's getting inappropriate with her. On his slideshow, this wasn't a story. This was him putting it in his actual happy birthday post to Kourtney Kardashian. He put up a video of her sucking on his thumb in a very seductive way. That's not something you need to do. On his story right now, you'll see a photo where it looks like she's doing something very promiscuous on the beach.

She might be eating cake by the ocean. Oh. Well, these two are into each other. Dude, be eating cake by the ocean. Oh. These two are into each other. Dude, they're horny horny. It's crazy. His tea's just off the charts right now. Oh my gosh. I know. Okay.

Is Dizek just like punching air? Dude, that thumb sucking one. He doesn't care. Right? Yeah, he's probably just, like, does he even follow her? Gosh. Did you all see the breaking? I got breaking news.

What is it? Did you see who's going to Gonzaga? It's number one player, Chet Holmgren. Shouts to Chet. Dude, Summer of Chet is upon us. Church. Did you see he was kind of doxing someone who wrote a negative piece about him in Vanity Fair? I saw that he was not a fan of Vanity Fair, but I did not dive too deep into what was happening.

I did read some of the article. He, yeah, he borderline, I don't know if he doxed her technically, but he was very, very aggressive. Should we do our new segment? Docs expose call out? No. That's a terrible idea. It's like not. I hate it.

What, dude? Are you going to call them out or are you going to docs them? Do we actually docs people during the segment? Yeah, the person that you docs, you have to follow through and you actually have to docs. Little docs. Uh-huh. Doxy lady. Should we get out of here?

It's time to wrap her up. Fun stuff. I got to go pick up lunch for KJ and I. Very cool. Very cool. Check out Too Much Dip recording later this afternoon. Drop it later. Do it.

Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. you