Circling Back - No One Works in Austin & Going Sober Curious

Episode Date: May 15, 2024

We've officially got a name and date for Dillon's Golden Tee live stream, the NYC-Dublin portal closed (obviously), Rory's getting divorced, the Golden Bachelorette reveal, we have a date for Trump vs. Biden, being "sober curious," applications to go to someone's Hamptons house, This Weekend in Fun, and more. Help support our friend Justin and his family here: gofundme Enjoy a free one-week trial on Patreon for additional weekly episodes: www.patreon.com/circlingbackpodcast Watch all of our full episodes on our new YouTube channel: www.youtube.com/circlingback  Shop Washed Merch: www.washedmedia.shop  (0:00) Fun & Easy Banter (12:21) Dillon’s Track House (15:00) Portal CLOSED (22:40) Austin getting ROASTED for not working (34:30) Divorced Rory / Single Boy Summer (41:00) Golden Bachelorette Reveal (45:15) Y’all freaking with Sober Curious? (50:10) These guys are looking for Hampton Hoes applicants (1:01:20) This Weekend in Fun Support This Episode’s Sponsors Squarespace: www.squarespace.com/steam (STEAM for 10% off your purchase of a website or domain) Indochino: www.indochino.com (STEAM for 10% off purchase of $399 or more) Naked Wines: www.nakedwines.com/steam (enter STEAM for both the code AND password to get 6 bottles of wine for JUST $39.99 with shipping included) Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

All right, we're back. Circling Back Podcast, Washed Media Headquarters, Austin, Texas. My name's Will DeFreeze. To my left, David. He scissors, he scotches. Ruff. Hey, so I'll get ahead of this. A couple people have reached out. There's a video floating around from a gas station in Italy. That's not me. I live here. I haven't been to Italy in a number of years. And just wanted to let everybody know that is not me. I don't know, it kind of looked like it was taped with like an iPhone 7. It could have been old footage from when you were there

for your honeymoon. It did not look like the best phone. It looked like it was lacking in megapixels. The siphon's being fairly quiet on the matter. Well, the community's really pivoted since this video's come out. There's been a lot of uh i don't know just different opinions on it uh it's been it's been interesting are people in support of what this gentleman is doing it's kind of split the community a little bit um i'm i'm of the i'm of the mouth orifice siphon only community.

And there's been a break off section that has been approving the rectal part of it. And that's just not the game that I play. Okay. Thanks for clearing that up. Yeah. A lot of people were confused. Would people rather know what that video that we're referencing is or what we're going to reference for probably the next six months and uh the replies to dylan's tweet from yesterday which one would you more likely want to stumble upon you might uh the one the reply to my tweet was far more graphic in nature have you

thought about like why your tweets why your twitter account, why you in general attract that kind of action? My only theory – There's a lot of big motion on your Twitter account. This is a working theory, but my theory is since I use the word daddy, which has been sexualized in our culture. Jesus. Since I use the word daddy in my tweet, I think it was just an auto bot response to that. It just finds – tweet daddy and see what happens you might get sweet daddy right now come on tweet daddy i'm not gonna do it just tweet

daddy i'm gonna say this for the record that that reply that reply stunk yeah do we need to tell the people what this reply was no or should we just tell them to go find it on actually it's gone i look yeah don't go find it you just say what it's been deleted i did not see it it appears to have been removed i don't know oh that's good that's good elon's cleaning up the streets a little bit yeah yeah um that was a close-up of what that was not an iphone 7 that's what i can tell you no what was a close-up of well a galaxy far far away it was a two-hole folks what were you saying randy i it said butthole and bio oh i did not realize that i did not i did not get to the text you didn't really need to go to the bio to see that yeah the person provided that yeah they presented

the ass but you know like what else we know what it looks like now like yeah you gave away the uh the cow with the milk or whatever is that what they say why why buy the cow when the milk's free or something how does it go that's that sounds right something like that well they gave it away but in this case which would the butt in this analogy is that the analogy i don't know i don't know either i don't know i don't know it i don't know i don't know it's disturbing imagery don't go look don't look for it if it's if it's still there i think it's not but two glasses of milk please speaking of disturbing imagery dylan chivery yeah so uh bad news for those who are

wanting to hang out with me which which I assume is everyone in Chicago. But I'm not going to be there anymore. No, I'm just kidding. Yes, you are, dude. You're not skipping Chicago. I will be. I will be. Yeah, Golden Tee wants me to go to their tournament, which I'm probably –

Just don't call it a tournament. It's the World Championship. It's the World Championship, which I'm not qualified to attend. No one's going to a golf tournament in early April in Georgia and saying like, like yeah i'm going to this golf tournament and i it's gonna be a wild time golden t world championships in vegas the last weekend of june which is the same weekend of the chicago meetup they have told me that they want me there they want you to let go and like just hang out i want you to play they want to see my skills they said so that means i'm on the track ball davy so So that's trash.

That's like giving Tony Romo a spot at the Nelson. He's taking another pro's spot. But does he show up and play? Yeah, he does because that's a great opportunity for him. Yeah, but I'm against it. You should probably go. I want to try to find a way to make it happen, but schedule is quite conflicting at the moment.

We got some – Just go, dude. We'll be fine. Can I break some news? Yeah. President Biden and Donald Trump agreed to a June 27th debate on CNN, the first onstage clash between the two in almost four years. I didn't think we were going to get a debate.

This is exciting stuff. Let's go. That is huge. I want – I got to see the ratings for that. That's must-see. I can't – I cannot wait. It's going to That is huge. I got to see the ratings for that. It's must-see. I cannot wait. It's going to be so bad. How much meth is going to go into these two bodies before they go on stage?

They're going to have to butt siphon. So are we just not going to go to dinner that day? Let's just get some food and go to a hotel and watch. Oh, yeah. We're going to be in Chicago? Yeah. Should we have a watch party in our hotel rooms with backers? Live look at me watching.

Ready? yeah should we have a watch party in our hotel rooms with backers live look at me watching ready he's kelsey plumbing again ladies and gentlemen do you know she got an absolute fit off hold on yeah i know just for chicago no okay okay go ahead will um in terms of chicago uh what is the room situation currently looking like we have uh four queen beds total basically okay so two people are sharing and i have all i don't care i'll volunteer to share you're volunteering yeah i don't care okay am i the least likely to volunteer to share in the company i'm a very i'm a very still uh bedmate i shared with you last chicago trip i believe so so i can confirm dylan is not a bad bedmate as long as my um he's not as long as my sexsomnia doesn't i thought you stayed with me i stayed with you in the last trip i think i stayed with davy no chicago trip last chicago

trip yeah it was you and me no it was me and dorn it's me and davey boy who do you stay with will micah no maybe almost seven years ago by the way i'm not gonna i'm not i'm almost positive i stayed with you dad look i have that effect on people yeah i stay with you in new orleans for the bachelor party facts we were we did great together no in the at the bachelor party i stayed alone okay i actually do think i remember this i think it was micah and dylan and then you two in chicago but when we went to houston it was you and brett and it was dave and dylan okay and it was me and adam in a different room i think that's how it went i stayed alone at micah's bachelor party because

i think i booked after everybody and I think they only had that left. But I think I ended up sleeping in your bed anyway. I'm a wild boy. I'm a wild boy. You said the debate's the 27th or 28th? I don't know. I think I'm going to have

to share a hotel room tomorrow night in Las Vegas. I got a buddy that's coming to stay with me and he said he'd sleep on the couch and he's much taller than me and I don't think he's going to fit on the couch. He's much taller than me, and I don't think he's going to fit on the couch.

So I think it's just going to be two homies in a bed. Well, I just got a sponsor for the Vegas trip, by the way. Who? Since they put this on Twitter, feetfinder.com. Perfect. Yeah. Perfect. So that'll be great.

Do you have any golf shoes that you're going to wear to this World Championships? See, weirdly, you don't actually play golden tea on uh natural turf yeah but you don't want to slip i'll probably just hit him with some tennis shoes do any guys play with like gloves or anything there's probably some bits going on for sure what if the night before you like take your salmon out of the microwave and your plate's really hot and you burn your hand the night before and you can't play it's like a stanza before his hand model gig i'm pretty sure that's just not going to happen it could i just don't it could though what if it was pure what if we're gonna find out if there's like tournament rules that we're not aware of like you know if you're up to code yeah and all your

methodologies like how many clubs do you got in the bag i don't i don't know yet i don't yeah i'm not sure okay local rules do they apply i'll do some some homework on it figure it out like do they let you do that cocky like stop the ball i don't know why they wouldn't just a little too cocky for them yeah is it gonna be good for the stream the way that you just like bust through rounds Just slow it down? Yeah, because you're so efficient on the machine that you can get a round done in minimal time. You can play a round in like eight minutes, yeah.

Yeah, we might need you to slow it down a little bit. What, Randy? Can you play with a fat-ass Hooter in at the World Championship? Ooh, yeah, true. You can throw Hooters in. I don't know. Performance enhancing. I'll throw a Hooter in.

I don't give a F. Get your Lucys while you can. There's a Zen shortage imminent. Imminent. Just because of Biden? I'm just give a F. Get your Lucy's while you can. There's a Zinn shortage. Imminent. Imminent. Just because of Biden? I'm just saying, people. Like, now's the time to get on the Lucy train. Just saying.

This is the perfect opportunity to go try if you haven't made the switchover yet. I've used our code on their site, and it's fantastic. Saved me a bunch of money. Hey, where are they doing the debate? I'm sorry if you said that already. They're doing it at the Coliseum. Really? Yeah.

The one in- They're doing it at the Sphere. Line in the grass? The one in Rome? They're doing it at the Sphereum really yeah the one they're doing it the line in the grass one in rome they're doing it the sphere and they're just gonna put graphics on the screen and the last one to fall over gets to be president like the last man standing that's hilarious dude biden wouldn't make it 30 seconds oh hey is he okay what happened no did you see the photo of him getting uh that last step coming off of Air Force One? Where people were just like, he's hitting that shit? That's an old picture, by the way.

Was he not stomping in the Air Force One? It looked like he blew an MCL. I know. It looked like it was going to end real bad. It looks like he was hitting the Quan or something. It was a weird stomp. It's a really funny picture. Great photo.

Hey, man. Hey, man. I'm fine. I love this fear, man. I love you too, man. I love you too, man. Yeah. You too is Hey, man. Hey, man. I'm fine. I love this fear, man. I love you too, man. I love you too, man. Yeah. You too is great, man.

You too. The last one to fall over is present. It'd be great, dude. Oh, that's good. Oh, we got a stacked episode. Let's hear from our friends today. Indochino. It's about to be wedding season. Weddings are usually about the bride and groom.

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You can order your custom suits now and be ready for wedding season. You can design every detail of your suit that you want, including the lapels, the linings, the monograms, the pocket flaps, everything. Dylan got a clean little tasteful monogram on the cuff of his shirt. I did. I got white monogram on a white shirt. I actually got a light blue shirt, my newest one, with the white embroidery. Look at you. It's classy. Look at you.

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Go to Indochino.com today and use code STEAM to get 10% off of any purchase of 399 or more that's i-n-d-o-c-h-i-n-o.com promo code steam we have a name do you want to reveal the name for your live stream dylan speaking of golden tea a few minutes ago yes after um fielding a lot of suggestions from all you people thank you for that i don't know who came up with this one actually i don't know either it was a backer i think it was a backer and i will dave's got to try this out we can just call him if i can find the yeah just holler at him dylan's track house oh see it's like a trap house but there's a track ball on the machine we could call this person right now. We don't need to.

But we do. I do have your number in, sir, from the 828. Thank you. That's you. That's you. Reach out to us. We'll send you something. Yeah, Dylan's Track House.

Official. It's official. Debuts a week from tomorrow? A week from tomorrow is the first stream. We got some exciting things going on to accompany the stream. I'm pumped, man. This is going to be a lot of fun for everybody. I'm excited.

I kind of forgot that the live stream was going to be midday when I committed to the gonster. Will is going to be drinking a gonster. A midday gonster? I'm trying to negotiate a gonster cam if the tech is there, but I'm not sure if we're going to have a tech. It'll be Thursday. Thursday, we'll get an episode out of – no episodes Thursday unless you have a retail.

We'll be good. We'll be good. I'm going to intentionally not schedule a retail therapy post-Gonster. You're going to do a Gonster. I will commit to one Italian gas pump on the stream.

Okay. That's fine. There's a J that I will be smoking at some point, but we're going to have to make you guys work for it. Yeah. I think we need to hit

a subscriber goal either on Twitch or on YouTube. I thought Randy took the J. Randy, what time does the stream go live? No, he took the L. No, I don't think we've officially gone, but I'll say 1 or 2 o'clock. Let's make it a fish.

Let's do 2 o'clock. Let's do 2 o'clock. 2 o'clock on Thursday, which is the 23rd. Yes, so not this Thursday, not tomorrow. May 23rd. A week from tomorrow. 2 o'clock. We're going live, baby.

Boom. Dylan's track house. It's going to be an absolute scene. Trackball is going to be absolutely spending we'll be on youtube and twitch it's on the washed media youtube youtube.com washed media it's not going to be on the circling back one it's going to be on the washed media one yes go subscribe very exciting stuff going on but please subscribe because the faster you subscribe the closer we get to a milestone that requires dylan to uh smoke a j on camera yeah yeah yeah yeah a live j a live j i'll let you partake too if you would like i there's no chance me smoking a j live why because i'm fucking crazy with it okay you only spoke uh

crypto live cryptocurrency is this irresponsible for me to do as a father? And like, is it going to get out there? No, I think weed's better for you than drinking at this point. I just think it's the stigma around it that we need to change, you know? Got to make sure Parks is not with me that day. That's extreme tie-dye shirt guy take. Yeah. I don't know what this next thing on the rundown is about, but I assume it's good news for Arch Manning

since there are all these concerns about him leaving Texas, right? The portal is closed, shut down in New York City, New York City and Dublin for that matter. Is it sad that this wasn't a crank reveal

from either Davis Clark or Tony P that got it shut down? It was an up top reveal. If this is the thing that shuts it down, surely worse has happened prior to this why was not doing it like a schedule one drug in in dublin like why was that not what got got it shut down but boobs in new york were like it doesn't that doesn't equate to

me i don't know the laws in new york but surely it's not illegal to pop top as a female in new york city right i don't know i don't know the laws public and i would assume it would be illegal yeah probably is it's legal here isn't it well it's legal i think it's just legal in a certain part of austin i don't know if they go everywhere in austin is it i don't think you can just go dump them out on fourth street i thought you could that's a good song name san francisco you can go nake there's a a lady you can just say naked no you can go nake i saw a lady not long ago walking up and down south of mar just completely topless yeah it's a vibe here sometimes you know she also had a diaper on so i don't think she was all there oh yeah that's sad

that's true story depressing yeah grown woman not a person is guilty of exposure if he appears in a public place in such a manner that the private or intimate parts of his body are unclothed or exposed for purposes. What about uptops? Mm-hmm. What about the shelf? That does,

oh, for intimate parts of a female shall include that portion of the breast, which is below the top of the areola. Yeah,

they don't, this, that's a tasteful way of just saying the word nipple. Why are they so scared of the word nipple? The statute doesn't say honker.

It doesn't say honkers? No. So that's a little confusing then right there's like uh yeah there's a gray area there so maybe they got the portal back up more security checked out this woman this woman's genius i think she's some sort of uh influencer type yeah she apparently she did have an only fans to promote so i don't know if that really worked or not. Did you subscribe? I don't even know the young lady's name, so nobody didn't. Not familiar with her game. I just feel like this is a really tame way to get it shut down. Like, if you're gonna

shut it down, I feel like someone needs to get, like, you know, hurt on camera or something. You saw Steve Buscemi got fucking... I saw that. Wow, what happened to him? Someone punched him in the face. Random guy, like that wow what happened to him someone punched in the face like rick moranis just got randomly punched in the face wait someone did that to rick moranis yeah you don't do that to moranis see the guy from honey i shrunk the kids yeah he is you don't do that to him dude he's like the most likable guy on earth yeah he's just a little likable dweeb

what's what's the problem he quit acting after his wife died so he could take care of his kids for their entire childhood. And now he's just dipping his toe back in the game. What a guy. Who goes up and... I want to fucking kill this guy. What a stand-up dude. When did this happen?

Stevie B? No. I'm more worried about Moranis. I understand why you could want to fight Steve Buscemi. He kind of looks punchable. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. fight steve buscemi he kind of looks punchable whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa if we're talking now steve buscemi's got more of a catalog than rick ricky moran no but i'm just saying moranis is more likable yeah shimmy's likable though yeah steve buscemi i'm just saying compared to moranis

i like buscemi yeah but he's so off the radar these days. You know? Yeah. You think they even knew it was Moranis? There's no way. 90%... No one recognizes Rick Moranis under the age of 35. Yeah. Yeah, you're right. And that's not a slight. That's just facts.

Right? That was a good movie. Honey, I Shrunk the Kids was a good movie. I would know Rick Moranis. You would? Spaceballs. Mm-hmm. Do I need to revisit Spaceballs?

It's funny. I remember watching it back in the day and being like, this is good. John Candy. It's a good parody. I think I saw it before I saw Star Wars for the first time. It was like, I don't know what this is all about. Making fun of it. A word.

Hey, the OnlyFans model who did the flashing, she's the same woman who told Dr. Phil she'd rather die hot than live ugly. Facts. I get it. She's HPO, dude. Her name's Ava. She bought is hpo hat ava louise okay okay congrats to her you ruined the fun for everybody you love our uggos too though of course for sure yeah for sure um oh what would you have done in the in front of the portal if you could

have been there what would have been your move if you were like walking by like if i'm trying to get it shut down no oh just you're moved if you wanted to just say what up to dublin i probably just would have uh what the fuck's up dublin dave you got to check your screen okay you need to scroll down a little bit because it looked very compromising i'd probably panic and hit him with a dab or something randy are you gonna juby slide through the uh the portal yes i'm gonna well i'm gonna moonwalk once i learn how to do that no you going to juby slide through the portal? Yes. Well, I'm going to moonwalk once I learn how to do that. Oh. You got to learn how to moonwalk, my man. I love that Randy's new hobby is just learning dances.

Learning a moonwalk is a lifetime move, though. Yeah. And to be honest, I've taken zero steps forward or backward to doing it. And I should have before this wedding, I'm going to. But I'll learn it. Are you going to learn how to do the Michael Jackson lean? I mean, that's just trickery. You need special shoes.

Okay, you don't think Randy's above getting weighted shoes to do a lean? You've got to put a nail in the floor. Exactly. Can you imagine if Randy got weighted shoes? He'd take them off and levitate. He bought roller shoes. Yeah, I can't imagine. Weighted shoes.

Hey, she's also the same chick who did the coronavirus challenge where she licked an airplane toilet seat. Okay, so she's just – okay. I know her game. I got her. And one final quote from her. She said, I thought the people of Dublin deserved to see two New York homegrown potatoes. Not a big potato producer in New York City, I don't think. I don't think people go there.

She called them potatoes. If she called them honkers, I would totally get behind that. Yeah. Two homegrown potatoes, please. Free the nipples is what I say. I'm surprised that that's illegal. People in Dublin are not stranger to some of these. No, they're like, oh, titties.

That's part for the course over there, I feel like. They're wild ass over there She dumped them out Oh That's not out for a player Two homegrown potatoes There's like some Irish guy Like

His wife catches him Looking through the portal Like She slaps him like What are you doing? What are you looking at? You got two perfectly good potatoes at home? They're gonna turn the portal back on though

I saw Good They have to This is so stupid what if they dylan's reply like just hold up your phone zoom in don't do that if we have any backers in new york which we found out we do there's any backers in new york and you want to spread the podcast just like do something for circling back and tell the people over in Dublin to start listening. We had an Irish backer, or at least a US American who lived in Ireland. That's sick. I love it when we have listeners abroad.

I posted a photo in London once and a backer hit me up and he was like, my apartment's in that photo. Say what up. Really? Yeah. That's cool. We know Australia loves us. We've got quite a few of them.

Dude, Australia's just taken over. Yeah. Everyone's Australian now in Austin. Well, not everyone. Everybody, dude. Okay. It's crazy. There are a few.

No. Yeah. Will gets burritos from the Australian coffee shop. Yeah. Now that I have a mullet, they respect me a lot more. Are you going to... When are you leaving? I don't want to cuck your weekend in fun.

I leave first thing in the morning tomorrow. Can you just go get a one on the sides? I know. It needs a little more on the sides. I'll set you up. It needs a little more on the sides. It's grown out a lot in the two weeks. It's sad.

You can always go back. Kind of miss it. The haircut place is always open. So it's just, you know... Not really. She's kind of got some spotty hours lately with two know two kids you know congrats you know what i mean congrats nothing but love hey austin got a widely panned on the timeline yesterday did you guys see this or it was the text this morning the first we saw of this i did not see this in real time i did see

i did i did hop into the replies this morning i saw it very quickly yesterday and then it was one of those things where twitter just keeps serving me quote tweets of it but zach solomon said 2 p.m on a tuesday in austin working from home culture here is strong and it's a it's two photos of barton springs the local uh i don't know swimming hole whatever you'd want to call it it's a pool that a lot of people go to it's just absolutely packed to the gills on a tuesday afternoon um and then people just started piling on i'm going to read some of the quote tweets here um one person simply said uh sorry did you mention this is barton springs i'm sorry barton springs in austin says uh this exists because the mid-level managers above them would get fired if senior management knew how unimportant the roles below them are so the mid-level managers let them would get fired if senior management knew how unimportant the roles below them are.

So the mid-level managers let it happen. It's a Ponzi scheme of people pretending to be busy when instead 50% of them should be fired. Shut up. Relax. Just relax a little bit. It was the first sunny, warm day in Austin in weeks. Low humidity day. It was a beautiful day.

It was wonderful. If there was a day to skip out of work and go do that it was yesterday uh i think this might be a bit but this guy said at my hedge fund i pay an analyst to walk around parks in austin san francisco new york and ask people who are tanning at 2 p.m on a tuesday where they work then we short the stop we're up 728 this year okay that's got to be a bit right it chris backy douche sick he's got hella followers and then someone just said austin is wakanda for project product managers i mean there's been a lot of tech layoffs lately in austin which is an unfortunate reality and uh it could be a symptom of that uh i will also say that ut graduation was saturday

there might be a surplus of people in town with a lot of shit not to do. A lot of college students in Austin, believe it or not. There's a pretty large state university here. It makes me happy that as the crow flies, this is very close to us. And it makes me happy that people are just absolutely roasting Austin for not being a real city. What's that water temp? 70s? No, no.

Cooler? Cooler. It's a chilly it's a chilly nice refreshing plunge chill the dough i'll look it up right now 68 to 70 degrees oh yeah i thought it was way lower than that it's cold that's weirdly that's like a pretty cold water temp it is it it feels fantastic and it's year-round too so it could be you know augustst, and it's 112 degrees outside, and it's going to still stay. Yeah. It's perfect. It's not as cold as my cold punch, though. I saw a tweet that said only 2% of people in Austin have real jobs, and then I was thinking

about it, and I was like, well, that's offensive. And then I was like, well, I'm sitting at my podcast job. Yes, yes. Someone quote tweeted and said, no one in Austin has a real job. And I almost said, define real. Yeah. Well, we go to an office. Yeah.

We do, believe it or not, we do have an income. We pay taxes. We do pay taxes, yeah. Well, sometimes. See this auditing stuff? We try to. What? They're going to start auditing a lot more people that make less money.

Ah, good, good, good. We got to go after them. Yeah. Yeah, we got to go after the people that need it most. Well, you always hear that they go after normal people because they don't have the manpower to go after the big – The billionaires. The billionaires.

Bernie Sanders, Randy. Is that the first ever Bernie on the pod? No, you definitely did a Bernie when he had the mitten meme going off. They just did the Bernie dance. It's good. From Weekend at Bernie's. It's good. Because he was dead famously. He's off. They just did the Bernie dance. It's good. From Weekend at Bernie's. It's good. Because he was dead, famously.

He's dead. They just dragged his ass around. Great movie. No rigor mortis on that dead body. No, Rick Moranis was just in Honey, I Shrunk the Kids. Got assaulted in New York City. They put salt on him? Assault Bay would be a lot less funny than Salt Bay.

That's terrible yeah it's just salting people yeah those are two tiny men he just walks up like this salt bae's a little fella doesn't talk salt bae no famously doesn't talk but will respond to your inquiries if you see him at the nacho bar what's his native language would you want turkish would you watch a would you watch a celebrity death match between rick moranis and salt bay dude salt bay's in good i think they match up so salt bay looks like he's on um maybe not testosterone but he's on like peptides he works out is he on clomid he's on collagen he wears those wife pleasers too doesn't he I think he just wears tight white tees. Yeah, you're right. I hate to say this because I want to rain on Salt Bae's parade,

but he's pretty nice with the soccer ball. He's got some foot skills that are not just run-of-the-mill stuff. He can handle a blade too. He cuts some meat now. Say what you want about the man. He knows how to cut some meat. I don't know if I need him to feed it to me. No.

But what if it's gold plated? I would absolutely let Salt Bae feed me meat. Like, no, I have no issue taking meat off of a knife that he puts in my face. That's good. That's good. If NFT Nick was really about it, he would fly in Salt Bae. Yeah. He's not, though.

He doesn't respond to DMs either. He salted your nachos. Especially aggressive ones. He was afraid to come into this DMs either. He salted your nachos. Especially aggressive ones. He was afraid to come into this lion's den. He salted your nachos. I wonder how many like – People can say that and just me. How many times he's walked up and just like unsolicitedly just like salted people's food?

What did I say to him? Did I say – I like – Salt bae. I go, hey, what's up, salt bae? I think I said, what's – I think I just said – You hit him with the Adrian Grenier. Oh, Adrian Grenier. I go, what's up, salt Bae? I think I just said, you hit him with the Adrian Grenier.

Oh, Adrian Grenier. I go, what's up, Salt Bae? And he stopped, looked at me. Maybe he had sunglasses on, turned, air salted my nachos, and then just went on about his business. I'd pay real money for a video of that interaction. Like, good money. Yeah, if anyone works for the Las Vegas Golden Knights

and you can find video from the weekend that that was even some CCTV footage would be great it was right after he did the whatever the Knights do before the game

they have like a a bell ringing they have like some Vegas they'll be tight if they just knighted some dope person before every game

you got a Knights all day you got like Wayne Brady down there just getting knighted you can just knight everybody starts to lose his shit I mean it's not real knighting it's just right it's a Las Vegas team You've got to knight all day. You've got Wayne Brady down there just getting knighted. You can just knight everybody. Starts to lose his shot. I mean, it's not real knighting. It's just the Las Vegas team.

Randy can knight. I don't think they have the authority to knight people. Randy has a sword now. That's because I have a sword. It doesn't mean that I have knighted. I'm not sure. You're closer to knighting than we are. That's true.

Is there an American version of getting knighted? Is it like the Purple Heart? I think the Medal of Honor, maybe. Medal of Honor, yeah. I guess that's probably more broad than the Purple Heart? The Medal of Honor, maybe. Medal of Honor, yeah. I guess that's probably more broad than the Purple Heart. They do it for broads? Getting knighted is way doper because you get to change your name.

You get to put, you know, something in front of it. Purple Heart's getting injured in like... Yeah. Hey, they should get Medals of Honor. They should. When you knight, but she keep boing-boing-ing. Come on, dude. About the knight. Like, if I got the medal of honor i'd be

like can i put sir in front of my name for just like a little bit no why it's a completely different country sir will defreeze that's the second a backer i dude a backer sent me a uh some photos the other day of a trophy a sailing trophy in Detroit, Michigan, that has my grandpa's name on one of the little placards from 1964. Blew my mind. That's awesome. Yeah. You didn't know it existed? Didn't know it existed.

That's so cool. I sent it to my dad. My dad was like, where did you get this? Dude. That's awesome. I got shooters everywhere, pops. 1964. 60s.

Out here. 60s is wild, man. I just want to go on record real quick i i don't think this is a big deal i don't either no and in fact this isn't even that this is crowded but it's not that bad this isn't like weekend it's also one of those things where uh this happened during covet a lot where people were bitching about people not like social distancing and stuff and people would take pictures of beaches that seemingly looked full of people from the side because it was just layer upon layer but if you take if you took the photo from above the beach looking toward the water you would see that people are spaced out an insane amount and it's like okay guys like the photos look a little more aggressive but it's also the nicest day in austin in the nicest month in austin

But it's also the nicest day in Austin, in the nicest month in Austin. Also, who fucking cares? Yeah, dork. Don't be a narc. Yeah, this dude's sitting on Slack posting complaining tweets. What's going on out there? What's that's going on? Zach Solomon should be getting roasted for being out there, too.

He was just sitting out there. Yeah, dude. Hey, player. He wasn't being shameful of these people, though. I think he was more just pointing out like, yo, it's a vibe right now. I got to say, I got to call us out as a company. Oh. We suck at doing like the shit that we're close to.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Whether it's like the Butler Pitch and Putt or like Barton Springs. No, dude. We stuck to those monthly happy hours for exactly one month. I'm going to spend a lot of time at Barton Springs this summer if y'all want to link. I'm fine with that. We need like a random, like yesterday we should have, I Barton Springs this summer if y'all want to link. I'm fine with that. We need like a random, like yesterday,

we should, I know we had like actual, we did have work to do. Yeah, like in school when it's a nice day, we're going to do class outside today. We could do class outside. Randy's like, no, I think we should be here.

As a pit staying guy back in the day, I hated class outside. It was a nice change of pace. I didn't like gym class sometimes because I just didn't want to deal with showering and stuff in the middle of the day getting all sweaty

you shot with your sweat trunks on I don't want shawties to see me in homeroom sweaty yeah that's facts nasty Squarespace today's podcast is sponsored by Squarespace Squarespace is the all-in-one

website platform for entrepreneurs to stand out and succeed online. So whether you're just starting out or managing a growing brand, Squarespace makes it easy to create a beautiful website, engage with their audience, and sell anything from products to content to time, all in one place, all on your terms. The Wash Media website was created, I guess, five, six years ago. And it's based off of, yeah, you guessed it, Squarespace. Squarespace makes it so easy to make a good looking website. They got templates for everybody. You don't need any coding experience. You don't even need a good eye because they've got so much out there that they just make it easy. So like just, you just log in, choose one,

start cooking. You can customize the colors, the fonts, everything. You can upload your own logo. You can even make your own logo within Squarespace. You can put up a little pop-up that says, hey, we're not launched yet, but we'd love your email. Well, you know, we are. You can do that. You can take restaurant reservations through Squarespace websites. You can sell products through it. You can do everything through it. I love Squarespace. Head over to squarespace.com for a free trial. When you're ready to launch, go to squarespace.com slash steam to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Again, squarespace.com slash steam, 10% off of your first purchase of a website or domain. Big news in the PGA Tour world.

A little drama. Roy McIlroy has filed for divorce. This was immediately followed by a Brooks Koepka Instagram of his wife looking smoking. And an ex of Rory's, Caroline Wozniacki, the professional tennis player, also supported Brooks's Instagram. But Brett is putting out an alert that it's single boy summer. White boy summer has already been rumored to be back this summer between Zuck wearing chains everywhere. Hey, real quick, does Brett's girlfriend listen to this?

Because she might not sign off on that. Yeah, I'm just going to say she probably doesn't. Brett's just talking about for everybody else. Yeah, but he's noted like Tom Brady, his singleness has never been more amplified after the roast. We got Rory just going out here. Tiger's single. He's got a goatee.

It's a problem. Yeah, Tiger's going through it. He's doing shrugs like crazy. That's all he's doing. Well, he can't do legs anymore. Oh. It's true. It doesn't matter.

It's not like you can gain muscle on your legs. It's true. Yeah, what's even the point? What is the point? What's the point, dude? Yeah, you should do rehab for people and be like, dude, don't even rehab that. Not even worth it, dude. Dude, it's all a sham, man.

Yeah, dude. Nah, it'll just go back to normal eventually. So I did see the fun coincidence that he did win his last major. All of his majors. Avahala. As a single man. But the last one in 2014 was the week of him calling off things with Caroline Wozniacki. Oh, really? Yes.

Okay, I didn't know that was part of the timeline. He has four majors as a single man and zero as a married man. Maybe sprinkle a little bit on Roars. This is a line of humor my wife doesn't like i'll tell you that much she doesn't like it when i make these jokes although he's not i think they just filed so i don't think it's official quite yet no that matters what about the rumor that uh the second it goes official he's signing a live deal for 800 million dollars that would be uh quite the heel turn that would be the ultimate heel turn yeah being like you know what hey i might i might love you or i loved you at some point

uh but i love 800 million dollars so obviously there's some live pga i don't know if you call it beef but some tension between i mean rory has been the like the most outspoken probably like he's skilled back but i think he has a tour now so brooken probably. He's skilled back. But I think he hates the tour now. So Brooks. I think he's over everything. You think Brooks' Instagram post was because of that? Or did they have a personal beef with each other? No, I think it was just.

Okay, so the post he put was because Jenna, his wife, is in that SI swimsuit issue that drops yesterday or today or tomorrow. It drops soon. Yeah. I think he was just posting that. i think it was just a coincidence i do think i do think the timing was very coincidental it also doesn't help that brooks is a little bit of a troll that is true and so like it he might have known what he was doing but i don't think it was totally because of that maybe he's saying this out of like to get in rory's head but he has said i think on multiple occasions that he could

if he could play with one golfer for the rest of his life it would be rory oh really and i don't know if that's like uh and there's enough there's enough reasonable doubt there that if you were asked like you know by a reporter like did you do that to you know to slight really no i might swimsuit issues coming out you know it's easy easy deflection yeah i mean ema holmes is in it okay oh okay okay okay she's very beautiful to me is she in the swimsuit issue okay good that's great happy happy for her it's it's pretty sad that i started i started writing for her after she got in the taylor gang and uh and just got in the swimsuit issue i was like man maybe she doesn't suck so much people forget that i released that swimsuit issue that was probably about 10 years ago today oh yeah that was crazy yeah shout out kate upton

yeah will uh leaked the kate upton swimsuit didn't mean to edition didn't mean to how did it land in michigan first because it was supposed to come out the next day so they just sent it out i think they just probably just sent out boxes to everyone like you know like if at the record store they don't just get the records in the day that they drop like they have in the back it's the mitten state yeah it's okay it looks like a hand they'll just play it by your own rules they're like you understand we'll put it on shelves a day early we don't care okay yeah i just don't think play it by your own rules there. You understand what he's saying. We'll put it on shelves a day early. We don't care. Fuck it. Yeah, I just don't think the gas station gave a fuck. I don't think they thought it through.

No, they had bigger problems out there at the actual pump. What was going on out there? It was a bad deal. Old Italian man was lingering. They had to get a new pump. Yeah. They had to put in some signs. Don't do that thing here, man.

Signore. What a day like. Oh! It couldn't have been a nicer day what's your what's your reaction if you roll upon that mama mia i'm pulling my phone out no i'm not i don't want that on my phone i'm just driving on by my own business he wasn't gonna squeeze the pump right dude no no he was just yeah he was just gonna put up there, if that happens to me, I'm not even really stopping. I think I'm slowly going down, and I think I'm doing a little honk and being like, come on, man. The reason I'm confused about the pump situation is because you can find something in a similar shape and just do that at home.

Yeah, but maybe the pump's perfect for him, you know? Maybe he's tried everything else. That cold steel. He's old, dude. He's old. He's probably tried other stuff. Yeah, that's the only thing that makes it like sad is this old guy yeah older dude maybe his wife has died like died if he was if he was 25 it's like you gotta live with that maybe his wife's dead he lives at this gas station just you know scraping by yes he does he lives in his little

apartment his little casita next to the gas station he's an italian man he lives with his mom he's a young man like. He lives with his mom. He's lonely. You're a young man. You got to live with that. His mom is not alive. The rest of your life. He's old.

It's like, ah, he's old. He probably didn't know what he's doing. It's better. It's like how we'll all do LSD when we're 85. Yeah. It's like, ah, he doesn't know what's going on. He's senile. Let him live.

Let him put a gas pump up. It's too old. What's the Italian word for narc? I don't know. Narc. Narco. Narco. Narco. Narco. Narco. Narco. Narco.

Narco. Mamma mia, narco. Oh, oof. What's wrong? The secret to my life. It is nice that that video had Italian speaking. Like, you know, it added a little something. It doesn't hit the same if it's got an Alabama accent. Added a little flavor to it.

It was nice that it wasn't here. Classes it up a little bit. You thought it the same if it's got an alabama accent added a little flavor to it it was nice that it wasn't here classes it up a little bit you thought it was florida didn't you when you first saw it you're like oh fuck this is jacksonville it was giving southeast yeah yeah no offense to our friends in the southeast of course you guys are yeah I don't know what we got there single boy summer for that guy he's gonna have a tough one trying to get any chicks

this summer that's for sure Rory's divorced yeah hey I hope I kind of I just want him to go on a run anyway

just be fun to have Rory go on a run not have Scotty just winning everything you have a real juxtapoy here you've got Rory yeah who's single now then you've got scotty who's like in dad mode like fresh two weeks in or a month in

right so it'll be interesting to see on for uh narrative purposes for rory goes on the tear or scotty continues i'll leave it up to the golf riders not me i'm not a golf rider dylan golf tweeter i have more breaking news is it joan you've seen the new golden bachelorette randy i hate randy with it it's a joan joan joan my joan your joan is the next Golden Bachelorette, my friend. Okay. Okay. Are you gonna go in? Okay. Are you gonna go in? Is 40 old enough to get on the Golden Bachelorette? Absolutely. Dude, come on.

No. Of course not. Didn't they have someone in their 40s on Golden Bachelorette for the first one? I don't think so. I think I remember saying that was unfair. Like, you can't have someone in your 40s. I'm not in my golden years. I i know but you can make her golden years platinum oh yeah you just come up you could be her little fuel attendant you could feel her fire dude 40 is not old enough for the golden bat how old is joan

she's in her 50s for sure 60 i'm guessing she's giving 56 60 60 says 61 here she's not gonna that's cool that's cougar status if she dated me i love my cougars that's not that's not no offense why are you telling me like yeah if you were on raya and you stumbled upon our friend joan are you are you taking that date the age parameters wouldn't would that i set would not allow for that to happen doesn't doesn't joan show proof that you maybe need to up your age parameters like wouldn't it be kind of sick if you were just like i just don't know joan i don't know if i could actually date a 60 year old will why because just we're just different different phases she's

probably got a lot of free time. She could teach you so much. Yeah. That's probably true. Yeah. She could teach you some life lessons. Have you ever had the touch of a woman 21 years your senior? No, I haven't. Me neither, man.

Me neither. No, me neither. I'll tell you about the guy that I went to high school with. Went to high school together. He's a year older than me. He went to Duke, graduated from Duke, and he moved to Italy. Or maybe he was just traveling there. Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah. We know. He married someone who was 65 at the time, and he was 23, 24. Pics? I haven't checked in with him in a while. I don't know if they're still together. I sat at your desk at Grand X one time and flipped through photos and it was blowing my mind i was like man what it's a big pivot to move from austin texas to just italy with a woman who was 40 years older they

got married like was she italian yes okay yeah yes um great diet uh mediterranean age quite well over there that was uh what like 15 to 18 years ago so she's you know she's in her 80s now i'm not saying anything i'm just hey they're hurting nobody i mean i'm happy for them hopefully they're happy and just like that's crazy not crazy it's different it's different you don't have to dig yourself a hole here was she um she loaded i don't know i don't know the pics did it wasn't giving loaded yeah none of the pics i saw were giving uh um this this guy by the way pig situation irl very bright kid like great student yeah he decided yeah he married and moved to italy it sounds sick pay pig situation. Very bright kid. Great student. He married and moved to Italy.

It sounds sick. There's precedent there. What do you have against Joan? He was a different kind of cat too. He had a walking stick and he would just explore the woods of Austin and emerge a day later. Okay, so it's Randy. This is the most Randy thing.

I don't have a walking stick. Do you have a staff? He was a different cat. Okay, so it's Randy. Yeah. This is the most Randy thing. I don't have a walking stick. You will, though. I might get a pair of blinders. Do you have a staff? It's a different cat. Do you have a staff? Yeah, the kid held the staff. Technically, yes, but no.

It would be a shocker if you didn't have a staff. I have a staff in my golf bag, which is a golf ball retriever. You have a staff. You had a staff that you fashioned into something else.

Correct. She thinks my staff is sexy she really turned her on have you guys seen the new fad single boy summer what is this it's not single boy summer um you guys have heard of like california sober where people like stop drinking and they just like smoke weed right boy have i you guys have heard of just like i don't know like people people have all these different ways of going blah blah blah sober have you guys experienced the uh sober curious lifestyle no can you explain what that is i can't really explain what it is um there's an influencer who's now gone viral because she's talking about being sober curious. And she posted an Instagram today or yesterday

that said, making the most out of a rainy day in Paris. I love that the sober curious lifestyle allows for a Negroni by the canal at 4 p.m. Smiley face. To which people started asking, what is sober curious? And how can something be sober curious if you're drinking a a booze heavy uh cocktail like a negroni at 4 p.m also like you wake up sober so you shouldn't be curious about what it feels like to be sober i'm like this thing i'm not just thinking about going sober for like a little bit sober curious people are pointing out she's stealing valor she's stealing real sober valor she's drinking a negroni is as strong as a like a martini that glass fox by the way oh yeah that's a hardcore glass dude that glass what's your ideal cocktail glass go that i like uh this is a little too like

the shit i like the look of this but the shape of it i want it to be lower and squattier i like the tiny grips does that make sense not really but you know what i mean and i have i don't i like a heavier glass if i'm drinking a crystal like a heavy crystal you get like an old-fashioned low ball low ball there's a double old-fashioned even there's a uh there's the store that i used to work for in michigan we sold really nice crystal and there's this one cocktail glass that was just a giant glass all etched crystal into it that had like a palm tree etched into it the glass was like 375 and i was like i would just love to have one single cocktail out of this glass one day yeah just slosh that shit around although she was drinking from a straw

she's drinking her negroni through a straw it's a shitty looking straw too yeah but like sober curious it's gonna kill a whale so what so what is it i don't know i'm pretty sober curious i'm not i had one beer last night i was like yeah i think i'd rather be sober i'm not gonna have another one sober january that's kind of sober curious no i didn't do sober january you've done it did i oh yeah i've done it before i've never actually made it to like february i've broken on january 30th or 31st like multiple times i'm just a. I respect that, just breaking in on the last day possible. Well, what's, like, I remember one day, it was a Saturday, and I was playing golf,

and I'm like, why am I not drinking on this, like, nice day? I went to the JW downtown and had a drink at the hotel bar after. Like, what am I doing trying to be sober? Good choice. I'm not curious about that. Dorks. Dorks.

You shouldn't be curious about being sober. You should what it feels like no i just i got really fucked up last weekend so like i'm just thinking about going i think i'm gonna be sober curious for a little bit can you guys stall for two minutes before hampton hose so i can take a peepee yeah yeah that's fine i got a dm from golden tea by the way what'd they say they want to send us uh some swag to the office and they want to know what we're streaming on so they can uh be a part of it uh youtube and twitch for sure would you other platforms maybe tiktok and twitter is also in the discussion but twitch and youtube for sure ricky also hit me with some potential logos if you want to go over those while we wait for it yeah yeah fuck'm up on the screen yeah here we go here let's see this i like that dave doesn't even get to see this is getting it really exciting i know oh daddy i like i didn't expect i

mean i didn't not expect golden tea to be so into this but i'm like really happy they are it's great here's number one let me put this on screen for the oh okay okay it's very uh classic arcade style okay all the things i told him do would do classic kind of arcade dylan you said you wanted it to be for the folks at home. Ooh, okay. Okay. It's very classic arcade style. Okay. All the things I told him to do were do classic kind of arcades. Dylan, you said you wanted it to be 8-bit, not 8-ball. Mm-hmm. So that's good.

So that's good. So there's one. Okay. Here's another one. Okay. Ooh, I like the black. That's a little more... What was that fighter pilot video game

from the original Nintendo? Do you know what I'm talking about? Like Space Invaders? Maybe. I don't know. It kind of looks like that. Here's another one. Cool.

Okay. That's my favorite so far. Yeah, that's my favorite too. And here's the last one that he sent. Ooh, that one's kind of cool. Yeah. I think we could have multiples. You do?

Doubles? I think we need to have one for sure, but we can do all the ones. Go back to the third one? So you're like, you say like in this one, I like that one too. Yeah.

It's also giving Back to the Future, which I kind of like. Get off the screen. Dave's going to see it. Don't worry about it, Dave. Hey, dude, don't. Hey, later.

I'll tell him to keep going with that one and we'll get some more mock-ups of that style. Sorry, Dave. You missed it. Well, it's going to be on the show. No.

What time is the premiere? 2 p.m. Central Time. Not Central Standard Time. Yes. Central Daylight Time. You are correct. Good job. CST? CDT. What? Well, the domain name HamptonHose.com has been taken by NoCapCapital LLC, the Twitter account.

You can now go to this website and you can apply to go to these dudes' Hampton house this summer. Oh, my God. It started off as just a Google form form but now it's turned into something else and you can actually like go fill it out um i guess i have to fill it out right now i'm just gonna fill it out uh do you think using the term hose uh is going to you know like you catch catch more flies with honey situation i mean i think they're trying to be very upfront about it um when it comes to hoes just you know what they want i don't think they're looking for like housewives right here right that'd be interesting they ask for your phone number hampton babes may

may have worked too yeah i mean it might be less derogatory it's an alliteration what's your instagram is the second yeah second line to fill out they also have like i mean it says like height yeah okay i'm five foot under i'm just going through this whole thing right now um when am i available let's say i'm available august early august i'd say this is funny so hold on i'm trying to i'm trying to get to the end yeah oh fucking a this is not working do you okay you get to the end of this question six out of eight do you use filters on your pictures to change your appearance they clarify facetune or face app i'm gonna say no I don't have you been to F1 or Super Bowl this year

yes I paid to go yes I was paid for no I'd like to go no not my thing yes I was paid for that's true that's accurate I didn't go to the Super Bowl we went to F1 we were paid to go good for us

would you like to bring friends that ask for their Instagram names? Ooh, drop Dylan's ad. I'm not going to dox you like that. What's your AI girl? Mila Sofia? Mila Sofia. Yeah. You still following her?

How's she doing lately? She's killing it, man. Archie went through kind of a rough patch. She hasn't aged a bit. I heard she tossed him out for the Dubliners. Unless or hell that would work from ai it was a hologram that they they got going that's sick i mean i met sally through a form i i didn't call her a hoe or anything oh you didn't but uh yeah

like i kind of respect what these guys are doing not from a sexism standpoint like it's it's this is easier than inviting people and getting turned down you might as well just find people that are actively wanting to go and hang with you and vet them beforehand hamptonhose.com should i just do this for golf trip stuff instead of asking people to invite me should i just set up a form and be like join my crew how'd you meet your boyfriend i submitted application through hamptonhose.com yeah yeah it looks like a nice house if that's the actual house i might just apply and be like hey i'm a i'm a chill dude this guy there's no

way this guy's name is just chet like that's just too perfect for this it could be i think it's probably not it's probably he said in all seriousness this is not my form okay kind of sounds like it was your form yeah but yeah i respect that they've upgraded their form away from the google form and they've put it in a different different like whatever do i is getting to the hamptons a beating i think so i don't know like is it word like i think there can be a lot of traffic if you're not like you know one of the elite rich people who can fly private in or chopper in sure like barrett and i did a retail therapy segment a couple years ago about people who are getting botox in their bladder because they wanted to be able to last longer in the car on their way to the hamptons

there's no way that's a real i swear to god i swear to god it was i'm gonna do that new york times article i'm gonna do it so i can last longer on podcasts so they can make it to the Hamptons without having to pull over pulling over on a road trip does stink what's the drive from the city? I bet it's with traffic two and a half hours yeah I think with traffic it can be like three hours or something like that

I think it can get pretty up there that's a different world man I know nothing about that part of the world it sounds terrible driving and doing that the entire time What do we find Dave 321 321 at the moment? You gotta have a you gotta have a PJ or a chopper a chopper from the city is ideal Here's how you know, I'm broke. I the Hamptons is in a direction. I did not know I thought it was like I thought I was like north

Turns out it's not a Like Never been to the Hamptons. Never been to Martha's Vineyard. I don't know how much of a desire to go there. I mean, I would accept an invitation to the Hamptons, but it's not on my list. Never been to Spain.

I've gotten one or two invites to Martha's Vineyard with some family stuff, and I just couldn't make it happen. Not big motion from your boy. Never been to Martha's Vineyard, but I do know Shep and Ian. Yeah, Shep and Ian are good dudes, man. I just wear, I put off those vibes when I'm rocking my V-Vines. Sure, yeah. motion from your boy never been to martha's vineyard but i do know cheffinian yeah cheffinian are good dudes man i just wear i put off those vibes when i'm rocking my v vines sure yeah yeah

yeah is it pastel boy summer collar pop single boy summer single boy summer yeah single boy summer david i might need to sort our shit out that's just a long process yeah it's pink polo so i might need to punt till 2025 i don't want to rock the boat hey i owned a pink lacoste at one point that's fine dude i owned a uh i owned a like marine green uh vineyard vines polo that i wore a lot at one point dude vineyard i still like seafoam green that's a fun color this was like a seafoam but like a little more it was a little too far a little too far you just took this took that shade of green too far yeah people were like dude

you need to dial that's too green player yeah dude you gotta bring it back a little bit it's too foamy draw the line at sea foam no i like rolling with the foamies all right what dude what's your most regrettable polo oh um i never got into vineyard vines actually which is nf of me no but texas texas shouldn't it's more of a northeast thing oh we we still we still plenty of valor down here don't worry it's true yeah i mean boat shoes like no one's on a boat down here yeah they are a lot of people like austin damn river austin you know what i'm saying lake clothes this weekend in fun don't you have a maga polo david he never really got into polos it was more of a hat play yeah polos is tough you gotta get different sizes and everything.

Easier to ship. I mean, logistically. Yeah, that's true. Than a hat. Yeah. Yeah. For sure. Yeah, just get a little envelope.

My most regrettable polo is a really, really large Arby's one that I didn't wear to a No, yeah. The regrets of that are that you don't still have it. Correct. It's upsetting. Or do I? Do I just fill it out more? No, there's no way way that's the same polo

like there's just no way i don't know man how did i get two i just took a second one home yeah it's definitely a different one i think they gave us multiple polo you left that one in ponte no i donated it you didn't get smithsonium you didn't get rick moranis and in ponte vidra beach he didn't shrink the kids yeah dude yeah i didn't shrink the kids in ponte vidra Beach. He didn't shrink the kids. Yeah, dude. Yeah, I didn't shrink the kids in Ponte Vedra. We just ate, we just ate Arby's sandwiches

and no Arby's sauce. Also, no curly fries. Huge mess. Not Michelle's fault. Not Michelle's fault, dude. Not Michelle's fault. Nothing. But all the Grey Goose

we could handle. Did we even touch it? Yeah. Oh. What did we drink a lot of was it gray goose i guess it was they sent us like three bottles full bottles of gray goose and that was that was a fucking trip it's really dangerous having access to like a cool golf tournament and also like unlimited drinks at said cool golf tournament because it's just you're not going beer. You're going, yeah.

I like to turn up. We had a time. I like to turn up. It would be a real shame if PGA Tour, we got cozy with them again. Yeah, and they got some bigger fish to fry right now. They need to bring Michelle back and us. Package deal. We don't go back until Michelle goes back.

Correct. I think she's doing fine. Yeah, I think she is too. I think she's pretty happy in her career. I think it's time. Bro, let's go out this weekend. There's a crazy event happening. I like to turn up. Bro, bro, bro. There's a crazy event happening. Let's just go have fun

and let go a little. Let's go. It's This Weekend in Fun presented by Naked Wines. I don't love going to the store to buy wine. I went through my Naked Wines the other day and I was forced to go to the grocery store for Mother's Day and buy a bottle of wine. And I stood there and I even told you guys how annoying it was. I had people standing in front of me, couldn't get to the bottles I wanted to, didn't know anything about the bottles. What if there was a service where you didn't have to walk into the store and have no idea what you're doing what if what if they just sent it to you i recently used our code to purchase a uh a box of naked

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Dylan, what are you getting into? Thanks for asking, Will. I'm going to start Thursday because Parks has a second round of the playoffs, playoff game number two tomorrow evening, which I'm pumped for. He's playing so well, like I mentioned already. So that'll be a lot of fun. And then nothing really going on Friday. And then Saturday I'm going to probably take Parks out to see my mother.

Other way. We couldn't go for Mother's Day because we had scheduled conflicts. So I'm going to go take him out to see his grandmother and I'm going to see my mom and spend a little family time out there. Definitely going to sneak in a Barton Springs trip too. Barton Springs pool. Don't know if that's going to be Saturday or Sunday. Guys and their job. Get a job, dude.

Get a job. Sonny. I know. So I'm pretty excited about that get a little swim off you know so you're gonna come in bronzed i hope so i can sure use it lebron's james over here that's what they're calling me don't look at me it's not that bad it's not that bad that's all i got not that bad i yield my't support that. It's not that bad, dude. That's all I got. It's not that bad. I yield my time to David. What's that boy getting into? Let's see. We've got...

T-Ball's over, man. I'm kind of bummed. I was really enjoying it. In lieu of T-Ball, Saturday morning will be a brewery trip. The brewery with the sick playground, where we will be joining some friends with their kids and letting the boys run around. Hopefully get worn out and go home and do what they never do, take naps. It would be kind of funny if at breweries they just gave little kids the drinks that they have in the little taster glasses.

You know when you do a beer flight? I do. It would be really cute to just have the kids walking around with little pints of apple juice. That would be delightful. Instead, I would just be drinking cold brew coffee. And I probably won't do a morning beer. We go at like 9 or 10. It feels too early to...

Yeah, that is early. I'm not really looking to jump on it at that point um but how many how many how many dads need to jump on it before you jump on it oh honestly one yeah if i being number two that's that shows solidarity with the one guy who wants to do it oh yeah yeah yeah it just it takes one and they've got this particular place, man. They've got multiple trucks, breakfast taco trucks. They're pretty good. So I'm kind of looking forward to that. Other than that, man, I'll be doing a hockey NBA playoff action.

Hopefully we're done with hockey by this weekend, but we're not going to be done with basketball. Oh, God. It's wearing on me, man.'re not going to be done with basketball oh god it's just it's wearing on me man just need it to be over um over as in like this second round i'd like it to keep going but man i'm i'm i'm a tired boy so i'll be hanging out i got no major plans this weekend my team's too good sorry man sorry about all the sports success well you know it's it's a stressful time yeah there's a stressful time playoff runs can be very stressful it's not wouldn't be that bad if they

didn't make the mavs and the stars play on the exact same night every every night is it nice having an off night though reset a little bit chill out relax i i definitely did that last night but then i i started watching nuggets and they look really good and i'm watching yokich just like i still stayed up a little late a little naughty go ahead go to las vegas nevada uh tomorrow we arrive pretty early in the morning. I'm going to go play a round of golf. I really am not looking forward to checking.

I don't know why. I hate checking my clubs at the airport when I'm carrying on everything else. It's just not something I really feel like doing. Yeah, I get it. So I'm going to go do that. Do people still do ship sticks? Yeah, but for a trip like this, you can't really do that. Yeah. There's a part of me that's like, should just rent should i just take this out of the equation i don't know where you're playing but if you're playing a nice course i feel like i could

do that i don't know you never know if the left-handed clubs are gonna be nice or like the shittiest i feel like where you guys will likely be playing they will have a brand new set of callaway or taylor made irons. I can see that. I can see that. But they're still not yours. It's still just weird. I'm probably just going to do my own. And then tomorrow night, we're going to the Sphere.

Dead & Company. All three nights. Very excited. Don't really know what to expect. Friday, because we got a little deal with Fountain Blue. We got a little relationship there. Doing a little pool day action. I don't think I'm going to go off at the pool as I have a long day ahead of me. But, yeah, I don't really know.

I don't really know what's going to go on out there in Las Vegas. What do you do during the day if you don't want to spend a bunch of money and you don't want to gamble? Go to a show. Sit by the pool. Go to the Blue Man Group or something. Go get bronzed. Yeah.

Go wait in line for 40 minutes for a buffet that's very average. Yeah, I could do that. I could do that. Yeah, it should be a good weekend. Getting home early by Vegas standards on Sunday morning. Get a vibe with the kids and make up for some lost time. And I don't really know. There's talk of a Matt's El Rancho trip happening on Sunday.

I had some family members do a favor for me, and I told them I'd pay them back in the form of Matt's El Rancho trip happening on Sunday. I had some family members do a favor for me and I told them I'd pay them back in the form of Matt's El Rancho. So you might see me there. Other than that, it should be a pretty straightforward trip. Do anything sick this weekend, Randy? Any rent fares? My weekend also thursday because i'm going to be on a flight back home to chicago and i got a wedding this weekend so friday playing golf with some of the boys uh friday night's rehearsal dinner friday saturday's uh the wedding and then sunday and monday i'll be hanging out with my mom and my brother and Denise and all that. Family time. Will you break 100? You know what?

I got to hope I do. I'm feeling much better. I was feeling good that day. I don't like that Randy's sneaky close to breaking 100 because that puts him beating one of us in play on a bad day. Who had Randy being much more into golf than I am these days? Randy's frat randy's the kind of guy who gets into shit yeah randy randy randy likes to pick up interest good for you randy so yeah do you guys want any tie-dye shirts or anything for the concert

maybe sure okay okay we can make that happen i don't own enough tie-dye i might wear this one to the concert i kind of like it i put it on today to try it on i was like i think i'm just gonna wear this in the suit did you see the newest video of the uh scramble team who wanna no should we do something with it we should just run that clip what they turned in a 43 yeah a 43 oh we should before you leave we should probably just do another one since it's like our highest. It's true.

Viewed clip of all time. Stitch that shit. 43. Put your face on it. Let's get Adam on call. Yep. Yep. The guy accepted the award and he just gives double birds to everyone who's like, you didn't

shoot a 43. Correct. Yeah. Correct. Shameless individuals who just don't care about the well-being of others. Oh, man. Okay. These are people that piss all over the seat at airports and don't clean it off.

Yeah. Asshole. Scumbag. Asshole. Oh, God, yeah. Bye. Bye. Bye.

Bye. you