Circling Back - Pints and Bourbon at The Saloon

Episode Date: August 22, 2022

Howdy there, pards, welcome in. Today, kick your feet up and enjoy the sweet sweet tastings of Guiness, raw eggs, Jack Daniel, and all of our other offerings. We might even recap our Weekends in Fun before discussing the new Chipotle candle. Don't worry, we'll leave the light on for ya. Support us on Patreon and receive weekly episodes for as low as $5 per month: www.patreon.com/circlingbackpodcast Purchase a Circling Back Candle: www.vellabox.com/circling-back Watch all of our full episodes on YouTube — New YouTube Channel Shop Washed Merch: www.washedmedia.shop (0:00) Fun & Easy Banter (20:32) Recapping This Weekend in Fun (38:27) Guinness and Raw Eggs (54:42) Frats Gone Rogue (59:11) Chipotle’s New Candle Support This Episode’s Sponsors Vizzy: www.vizzyhardseltzer.com/washed Rhoback: www.rhoback.com (BACKER20 for 20% off) Chime: www.chime.com/steam BetterHelp: www.betterhelp.com/circling (10% off first month) --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/circling-back/message Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

All right, we're back. Circling Back podcast presented by Vizzy Hart's Seltzer, the only heart seltzer with vitamin C from superfruit acerola. My name is will de freese my left david roth do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do it's back game of thrones famously i thought that was harry potter same wave oh sorry hold on every poor harry potter's always on in my home i'd be fine if harry potter was it was the background i can't do the office background anymore david you know what we're

transitioning out of that because it got to the point where every time i would get home i would say we just watched this one last week and she'd be like what do you want me to what do you want me to put on is there there's gonna be a point in the world where watching The Office is a foreign experience because offices will not exist in that same way. People are going to be like, what? Why are these people all under the same roof together? I think people will always know what offices are. I know, but it's not going to be relatable.

It's going to become unrelatable to people. People are just going to be doing hijinks over Zoom calls, Skyping. That show got so popular. Electronic man. Well, that's why Frasier has withstood the test of time because, you know,

problems like trying to get black market caviar or getting tickets to the opera, those things don't go away. Those transcend. Shut up. That show, The Office, got so popular

that it got too popular and people like to shit on it some but it really is a brilliant show no the people that shit on it are just they're just trying to get twitter likes that's true keep shitting on friends i've done that before though continue to shit on the show friends as it sucks so friends is fine someone in my household has tried to facilitate the pivot from the office to friends. And I'm just going to say I'm not having it. Nah, I'd be fine with that pivot. No, I can do friends.

I grew I grew up like friends was on a lot. You're a big Ross guy. Not a big Ross. Ross Geller. Not a big Ross guy. I've already said they took Ross in the same route that they took Corey Matthews and Boy Meets World. They made him too fucking weird and not fun to watch that's my ross like no one should feel bad for ross like he we're on a break that's my ross well why did it sound like it we were on

a break we were on a break of course no it's not it's not played by christopher walken okay he would have crushed that role. I watched the one where Jennifer Aniston's dating some dude, and she gets some sexy lingerie, and she's on his couch, and then his parents walk out of the room with him. Oh, classic. She's just sitting there, and the dad's ogling her. He's got the awoo guys.

I mean, it's Jennifer Aniston, wouldn't you? The dad was a little too horny for my liking. I'm a Monica guy. Everyone knows that. I was early touching base. That was early. If someone wants to make that case for Phoebe, I will absolutely hear it.

I will hear it. It's weird that girls are really attracted to guys that play guitar. And I don't think it reciprocates the same way for the male attraction towards females. I prefer that they don't play guitar and like i don't think i don't think it reciprocates the same way for the male attraction towards females i prefer that i prefer that they don't play guitar i prefer that no one ever sings in front of me live ever yeah dylan shivery speaking of me not wanting people to sing in front of me yeah i know this is not too much dip as it is circling back, but I'm going to talk some football, man. You guys hear about this Quinn Ewers guy?

You're using your best material. Named the starting quarterback for the University of Texas. Dude, what are you going to talk about on Too Much Dip? I'm absolutely buzzing over this news. Buzzing. Will knows what I mean by that. So what was the background about all this uh controversy of of the the revealing here so uh word started to leak out from a few different publications said that hudson card like travis's own was going to be announced as the starter for game one

extreme texas football name by the way. Yeah. Hudson Card. Yeah. That's a Buddy Garrity. If you can remember, he started last year as a redshirt freshman. He was a redshirt freshman. Before losing his J to Casey Thompson. He lost his J famously. I put his fucking mailbox in.

Anyway, since Quinn Ewers, per these news outlets, was not going to be the starter, a lot of Texas fans panicked because college football fans are very fickle. Well, and it can't get here soon enough. And it can't get here soon enough. They were very upset that their savior was not starting. It was wrong information, turns out, as Quinn Ewers was announced, I think, the next day. A different take.

It was correct information. Somebody, a Red McCombs type, you know, these boosters, said, you know what? We dropped the bag to get this kid here. They don't have that kind of authority. We need a story. You can't tell a head coach of a major D1 program who to play. At the University of Texas, I think he can.

Yeah, you can. That did not happen. We'll talk more about it on Too Much Dip. We'll talk more about it if you want to. I'll go toe-to-toe with you. I was having an affair with someone at my car dealership.

I'm proud to announce that I'm already turning down tickets to the first game. Ooh, I might go. Hey, you're not going. You're not going.

You don't want to go see Louisiana Monroe? Yeah, I'm actively turning away tickets. If you have tickets that you want to offer me, you can offer them to me, but I will turn them down. We should do a Quinn shirt, like some kind of a blonde mullet situation.

I'm telling you, it could sell to people in this city. Let's just use his name, image, and likeness. Okay. And break him off a stack? No. Not at all. Let's just make money off of his publicity. Quinning.

That's a good one. Someone's making that shirt. And it sucks, I have to say. But I understand why you'd do it. You can make money on that. The dude has a mullet. Famously. That's crazy, dude.

No one's doing that right now. How long until the Arch chants start coming up? Well, he's in high school this year. I know. I'm going to start chanting at first game. Probably not this year. Bring't know i'm gonna start chanting at first game probably not this year bring on arch bring on arch i was told he'd be a three star if his name were not a manning is what i was yeah doesn't he go to us i got some small school that doesn't play anybody why'd you look at me isn't that the knock maybe like we haven't

we haven't seen the real arch he doesn't't face great competition. How do you guys feel about Peyton Manning's new game show? I haven't caught this. We got to stop just giving every ex-athlete a producer credit on shows. No, no, no. Peyton's over. LeBron James was good. LeBron was legit good. The Room with Dwayne Wade was also good.

No. The Room was terrible. The Room was good. The Room was good. I think everyone in the world generally accepts that the room is an objectively maybe even subjectively good show no i don't think it's even on anymore no i think i think people it's in syndication no people can't get enough they're they're binging it there's nobody binging it i like dwayne way the wall is good but lebron is not a part of the wall now he has his name on the

executive producer credit. Great. Let's go. I don't watch any of these dumb ass shows. D. Wade, of course, is the host of The Room. I just don't think he's got the charisma to host a show. I think he does. Oh.

I like D. Wade in this role. I need less Cooper Manning. Why is Marquette not in Marquette, Michigan? Why'd they put that college somewhere else? Doesn't this seem weird? I didn't know there was a Marquette, Michigan, so this hadn't crossed my mind. Yeah, it's a very bigette, Michigan. Why'd they put that college somewhere else? Doesn't this seem weird? I didn't know there was a Marquette, Michigan, so this hadn't crossed my mind. Yeah, it's a very big part of Michigan.

Dylan, it's in the Upper Peninsula. You heard of this place? I did one of these H-I-I-T workouts this morning. Yeah, you told us. You know Rinella? He's famously from the UP. It was a very intense workout. This is the second time you brought this up to us in 12 minutes.

Yeah, but the first time was off, Mike. I wanted to tell the people about it, too. Asshole. My legs are in j are jello man did you recover properly did you eat have some cows afterward i had a smoothie what kind of what kind of uh did you get that like lymphatic drainage going after your workout i said you express your anal glands i set the treti at a incline okay then i did sprints in 30-second intervals, six of them. Oh, boy. Woo-wee.

I went to the doctor the other day, and they told me that I'm very healthy right now. You don't look that healthy. That's what I thought, too, but it's made me realize that my method of not working out and keeping my body supple and young and untouched and unchanged. That Trump method. It's working. Yeah. It's working. Yeah. It's working. She took my blood pressure and she goes, wow, that's way better than most.

And I was like, yeah, thank you, lady. What's your secret? Just not doing anything? Yeah, not doing anything. Yeah. We don't recommend that. If you let your body, like I, so I'm a man in STEM and I know how blood pressure works, like for sure.

But if you allow your body to like overwork itself like your blood pressure obviously probably goes up you know and like i just don't do that i don't know if science supports that but okay if it works for you i'm not happy if you sweat from movement you're dying oh it's like the life leaving your body didn't know that i've learned in my days of being a whoop guy which i'm not wearing right now i don't wear it as often as i used to you burn a lot of calories at the driving range and on the golf course a lot a suspicious amount though doesn't it make you it's the a lot of it i think is the heat don't you look at it sometimes and you're like did i really did i really exert that much energy doing this yeah so much so that i looked up how much you know like did i really did i really exert that much energy doing this yeah so

much so that i looked up how much you know like because i burned like 400 calories at the range i was like i was didn't feel like i was really going hard i was hitting golf balls and i looked it up they were like oh yeah well you can burn anywhere from like 800 to 1500 in a round of golf so i already burned everywhere skiing. That last day of skiing we did in Brackett Ridge, I set my workout on my watch. Probably wasn't accurate, but it said 3,200 calories. That doesn't shock me.

When my brother-in-law drew, he lacerated his liver skiing, and it put his body through a lot of stuff. He's not built different. He had a whoop band on, though. He pretty much maxed out his whoop band on though. And he pretty much maxed out his whoop band that day. It'll be his highest day strain,

no questions asked for the rest of his life. North of 20? Yeah. I mean, it's impossible to get, what's the high you can get? 21? I don't know.

23? I've never even got close. You can't technically get the highest you can get. Let's hypothetically say that high is 21, I think. So you can only get 20.9. You would have to max,

exert yourself all, like 24 hours a day in order to actually get the high score. And it's pretty much impossible. That's why like Tour de France guys would get like all the way at the top, but not quite there. And then they'd recover 100% the next day because I'm sure they're not doing anything illegal. Good thing they didn't have whoop bands back in high school.

Like you stayed home sick and parents were at work. Your mom's checking on the phone. She's like, Dave, why do you have a strain score of 17? Aren't you sick? I've been coughing a lot. Remember the Jane Slater story with her ex? Yeah. Is that real?

Yeah. I was here. I feel like I saw this on a movie one time and now people are just saying it. Her boyfriend at the time I think they had Apple watches And they shared each other's Activity with each other

Well he had a spike In activity At around like 2am Oh so he's like Working out late She was like Oh What's he doing

Like quiet You aren't home You're out And you had a Weird workout At 2am in the morning maybe he was wrestling with the boys maybe he was sleepwalking so what what did what was the uh he was cheating on her it was uh he was having sexual relations with someone else can you log that can you know you log the

activity after you do it it's like fucking i don't think you can do sex. Good old fashioned fucking. Maybe you can. I don't know. You should add that. Like call it something else like, I don't know. Yeah, they don't have a sex thing on whoop. Relations. They need to have one on whoop. It'll work out. Intimacy. For some.

Cranking. Cranking. Masturbatory. Practices. Don't say it. No. That'd be really weird weird i like how you struggled to come up with another name for sex yeah yeah i don't know i was just thinking of a way to class

it up for the apple people but hey can i give a big round of applause to our listeners oh buzzing me for me for a sec what'd they do good reviews good reviews um they just left goaded reviews like all last week i love these guys and ladies and everybody else i love everybody if you're a human i love you one said peak male fathers three dudes who just talk about what's going on in the world they sound like peak fathers who just recently started smoking weed to be trendy and keep up with the kids jokes on them. We started a long time ago. Yeah, we started three or four years ago, bitch.

Yep. We were smoking before it was fucking cool. I just smoked that sticky shit. Y'all know. I don't even smoke. It hurts my lungs. I'm a microdose edible guy. I burn only the stickiest.

Someone said at least two-thirds literate, at least two-thirds of the show's hosts are literate, would recommend those learning how to speak. Who's not literate? Didn't we determine someone might not know how to read last week was it you it was me oh yeah dave can't read this piece of shit's talking about me fuck you yeah we also got one that said their preferred pronouns are we dem and boys that's true okay i don't know that i don't know how that actually works if i was trying to talk to you no i want you to read my favorite one and it is a five star uh we got one that's

from user wow i love this pod and it said golf they must like our golf content dave oh wait it says we don't need golf content every episode please stop five stars though five stars so it's constructive criticism that's criticism we'll tag and be like, look, let's talk about it. Is it because we talk our personal golf journeys? It is, right? It might be someone who's upset with our live takes. Or it could just be your lack of handicap. Maybe it's someone who supports blood money. I don't have live takes anymore.

I do. I don't watch golf anymore. I just watch the U.S. Amateur. I like the guys that have goatees. The T-Man doppelganger. Okay, he doesn't look that much like t that's t-man it's not t-man t-man used to have that exact facial hair he did no it wasn't ever though no he did he did he did t-man had it absolutely i fuck with it on t-man though yeah t-man can pull it off this elder chump no way hey we have a u.s amateur i don't care. Who's your favorite amateur?

I don't really have any. I just like the pros. Go ahead, man. I like the pros. Patreon.com slash circlingbackpodcast. We'll be back tomorrow with our optimized episode that we do every Tuesday. Again, patreon.com slash circlingbackpodcast. We'll be back tomorrow with our optimized episode that we do every Tuesday. Again, Patreon.com slash circlingbackpodcast. We also have our new YouTube channel, which you can go subscribe to.

I will admit, our links to our YouTube channels right now are absolute trash. This is hashtag media problems. You have to have your YouTube channel established for like 30 days in order to get your custom URL. So we're just rolling with like shitty URLs. Why is that? Next week, you will be getting dope-ass URLs in your face. to get your custom url so we're just rolling with like shitty urls why is that next week you will be getting dope ass urls in your face so go go subscribe go help us out uh and if you're yeah if you're a fan of watching these on youtube and you're like where'd they go where'd they where

are they they're on our own youtube channel they're no longer on wash media's youtube channel i've been saying figure it out dope ass urls can't come soon enough facts i hate our urls right now hey there's sneaky college football starts this week y'all know that it's like we waited all this can i ask a dumb question yeah is this week labor day no i'm falling doesn't usually start on labor day weekend that's when the real this is like this is like this is like oh we're getting like the mac matchups and stuff okay i watch it because it's on but like i don't i'm allowed to he's not i'm allowed to talk down on mac why why am i not because it's fucking not cool have you ever paid tuition at a mac school dylan then maybe you

should host your takes it's not cool no it's like it's like oh it's on it's football and it counts so i'm gonna watch it but it's like i don't really know who these teams are i don't care well you know me i'm gambling guy so you know me i'll bet on any game man i'm crazy i didn't know that about you and how many units one big unit that's you should tell if you have a bookie day if you should just hit them up and be like i'm putting a randy johnson down on the bangles this weekend yeah with a unit he's famously the big unit yeah that's funny he also famously killed a bird with a pitch remember that that's tight though like the chances that actually happening are crazy remember when uh remember when fabio got hit by that goose on a roller coaster was Was it a goose? I thought it was a goose, yeah.

I thought a goose would take you out. Dude, I think you could die. If a goose hit you in the head right when you're on a roller coaster, you could easily die. Goose, they're formidable. It's a large bird. They are formidable. What do you think the smallest bird that could hit you in the head on a roller coaster and not kill you would be? Like a crow's not going to kill you.

Probably not. A parrot might take out your temple or something. a crow's bigger than a grackle and we're assuming our grackle is not bigger than crows i think a crow is bigger we gotta assume that we're not getting talons to the vitals correct here's very this is very topical how about a raven an owl i feel like owls are all they're all feathers right like i feel like owls are all feathers, right? I feel like they're nothing under there. Little brittle bastards. An owl?

Yeah. Dude, owls are so dope. No, no. I'm not saying that's a bad thing. I'm just saying. I think underneath those feathers, I think they're tiny. You would not want to get domed up by an owl. Low-key, an owl might be my favorite bird. They're so sick.

I'm looking at what an owl looks like without feathers, and I can confirm. Yeah, they're little bitches. Why would you want to know? That's every bird. Look at this little guy. Are you kidding me? Look at a bald eagle without feathers. Dude, that doesn't even look like the same bird.

It's unbecoming. Hello. Would you stop? Have you seen a bear without hair? Where'd my feathers go, David? Weird-looking animal. If you're sitting at your desk right now, Google owls without feathers, and you'll be happy.

It looks like something out of Beetlejuice. Yeah, this looks like something from Spooky Season. Maybe we'll... Dude, look at its eyes. They're so big. Google should censor that. That's not cool. It's time. This weekend in fun. Recapping it. Presented by our friends over at rowback they got some new shorts out i love them the waistband on these things so nice and cozy oh my gosh so uh yeah i've been wearing them a lot almost too much i don't have them on right now

because you wore them like three days in a row last week so full disclosure when the box showed up to my house which usually shows up here but it showed to my house um I do have to admit that I just I went and grabbed the shorts that I liked the best I know you did and I also have to admit and I think I already admitted this but I did stop at the office last weekend hoping that the box was sitting at the office so that I could have first first go around so I could try them on and see. They were not there. If you're listening, Roback,

please stop sending them to Dylan first. That's very Micah of you. Yeah. No, they have the updated office address, and they usually send stuff here, but for some reason, they reverted back to the old address. Don't know why.

That doesn't change it. It is very Micah of you. He famously ate the blue apron that was sent for the podcast he produced that was such bullshit he cooked it he cooked the blue apron not even a sponsor for us i just gave him free shit sorry i know it's it's not the case for a lot of people out there uh who live in texas where it's still famously hot but it is about to be a little cooler in a lot of the United States. And it's got to be QZ weather. Maybe even, I don't know,

hoodie weather from the Roback crew? Their hoodies are awesome. I feel like our focus has shifted to the shorts so much that we're neglecting the hoodies and QZs. And they're fantastic. They are. If you want to go get 20% off,

go use code BACKER20 at Roback.com. go use code BACKER20 at rowback.com. Again, code BACKER20 at rowback.com. Dylan, what did you get into this weekend? Thanks for asking, Will. Kind of shared last week that my wife Brittany has been having some health concerns, so we didn't have much to do this weekend, so we took it very easy, very chill. Didn't go out really at all. so we took it very easy very chill didn't go out really at all um for actually friday we went and got pizza together had a nice cold you got bay with a nice cold peroni on draft where from

home slice oh good choice you ever been to one in north austin no i don't fuck with that i'm a ridge only it's really cool inside there. Probably better parking situation. It's cool inside. Parking situation is not ideal. The home slice on Congress is the parking around there. If you're there on like a Thursday afternoon, you're done. So that was nice, man. A really crisp cold Peroni on tap is hard to beat.

Cool Adam once said it's the best beer he's ever had. He famously did say that then he got covered that same night yeah saturday covered while crowd surfing saturday we had the kids we went swimming uh great time ran would you swim ran into some my old my my high school buddies um careful they probably ran into you at great hills out we went to great hills they were there any booty action they were talking about us talking about Goosen. That's a serious question. Did you see my tweet the other night?

That was a good tweet. Hyper niche tweet. They sent it to me and said, hey, what the hell is this about? So I had to explain it. I was like, well, you guys won't stop Goosen my boy Dave, and he wants to talk about it on the pod. Oh, don't put this on me. I was like, Eugene.

This isn't on Dave. I was like, Eugene, you keep Goosen my friends, and they want to talk about it. It was one goose. And you've talked about the goosing before, though. No, there are some goosers. Yeah. They will goose you. They have to acknowledge themselves.

They need to take some personal responsibility when it comes to goosing. They goosed me at the pool when I saw them. Exactly. It's what they do. Precisely. So that was a fun day. Yesterday, pretty chill. We went and got some nachos at matzo rancho yesterday

yes i said nachos really and they were very good you know they're really they're they're they're fine you can get them um what is it double dressed no they have like a like an off menu way you can style it's like it's this a hack so it's like animal style like pablo style or some i have to ask brittany she knows okay she told me to do it and they they give you they replace the um regular reflat refried with black refried beans guacamole on there and it's like pueblo or pablo style some shit i don't know pueblo pablo i was like i was eating was like i feel like pablo okay no no it was all a big setup for that yeah that was it wasn't i just came up with that just now that's suck that's how good i am it did suck but you know what i'm gonna do some stuff that sucks later so i feel

like pablo man doesn't get it kanye it's kanye reference I just assumed their nachos would be like their quesadilla. And when you pick it up, the grease flops it down. Nope. Nope. They remain structurally in sound. Structural integrity there. Famously, when we left Matt's Rancho last night, we drove right by the office. I brought my remaining nachos, which there are plenty left, and I put them in the fridge. I'm going to have some for lunch.

You're not going to offer them to me for lunch today like you famously do with other leftovers? Hey guys, I brought in a couple pieces of pizza if anybody wants it. Here's an entire box of pizza. I know that you just

don't feel like bringing, it's easier for you to bring the box of pizza into the office than it is for you to recycle the box, the pizza box. You famously don't

break down boxes. Are you coming at me for offering you free food? Yes, because I think it comes from a place of inconvenience more than a place of generosity. It seems inauthentic. It's not true. I don't eat pizza three days in a row.

So if I have two days worth with some extra, I'm going to bring it up here like, oh, anybody want this? Give it to a homeless person. Last time Brando ate the pizza, he was very happy about it. More on Brando. Jerks.

Yeah, you should have said that we started off our weekend by going to olive garden for brando's last day oh yeah olive garden was an absolute movie dude summer fantastico i got the that place just really brings me back to the time i was at the old country yeah time i spent i was skeptical of this uh shrimp scampi but when they brought it out it was it was so good our waiter was new but he was very nice he even talked about some Netflix with me they had a kind of inserted himself into our Convo that's fine they had a nice uh full Chianti that we were sipping on too we really just brought it back when I was on the coast there in uh Positano it was just beautiful. God.

Shut up, dude. Dave, what did you do this weekend? Kicked it off by going to Olive Garden Thursday. Yeah, I'm counting that as my weekend because the weekend doesn't start until you're there just munching down on some scampi. Oh! Stop saying scampi. It was so good. It really was.

I enjoyed my – other than the 25-minute wait due to I I believe, they were short-staffed because it wasn't like they were... It wasn't bussing. Let's just say that. And the potential domestic dispute that we witnessed at the host stand, which was just the biggest bicker fest between the husband and wife over their seat at the bar. That guy's stunk. That guy was scum.

He was. They just hate each other. Clearly don't. That's probably their daily life. Like, every day is like that. I've never seen anyone do this. He walked in, sunglasses on, walked up to the nice hostess. She was probably 19 years old.

Like, hi, welcome to Olive Garden. How many in your party? Don't say a word. In lieu of verbal communication, he just hit her with the... He held up two fingers. Explain what I'm doing. This is audio, Dave. They can't see you.

He's holding up two fingers. Not even in like the deuce. He's doing a traditional peace sign. And she's like, okay. Then his lovely wife comes in a few minutes later and he informs her that they have a seat at the bar. And she was not going to sit at the bar. In fact, she said i'm going home and storms out of the restaurant that was a pretty good impression and he he he chased

her out said you're acting like a like a third grader or something like that which is not cool to say i know a lot of third graders who don't act that way yeah how many third graders do you know david at least two and nieces and nephews what grades parks in second so close he's he's adjacent that was so awkward she didn't want to sit at the olive garden bar which it's like you're not going to get a better experience at the table but she did show us who wears the pants in that relationship because the second she heard it was bar seating she just turned around and walked her ass out she was like bye who saw her in the car with her bare feet propped up on the dash i think randy did oh it was the guy oh god fucking busted ass feet gross nothing friday night saturday why'd you say that Gross. Nothing Friday night. Saturday.

Why'd you say that like Christopher Walken? Saturday. Saturday. Look at that. Saturday's for the boys. Got up. Went to the YMCA. Swim lesson with the Rhodes man.

His third one. He's swimming by himself now. He's doing the backstroke. No, he's not doing it. Do you know how to swim? Me? Yeah. I'm adequate.

Okay. I'm an experienced swimmer. Dylan, you said you were swimming in it recently. Yeah. See, this is a setup for that, and I respect it. I'm a very good swimmer, though, for the record. Yeah. Awesome.

We're doing dunks. We're dunking the kids and i'm very he can dunk already he can he's one it's hard to dunk in a pool too because the water is weighing you down dylan famously did jump out of a pool it's fully submerged in water one time yeah honestly that was really impressive will still thinks did you say my kids won was he not technically he is uh try in 19 months bro okay so he's not yet two he's closer to two than one okay and if we're still if we're gonna use that logic you're 39 but you're logic i'm 38 damn i gotta i'm almost 40 dog i'll be 40 in 14 months y'all coming to my 40th birthday party for sure can't wait okay where is it tbd man after the y i went to the uh driving range in my bathing suit they're gonna do we're gonna

do hibachi in my backyard fuck you david go on i balls. I really, I'm finding some things on the range that I didn't know I could find. I mean, there's nothing better than finding the slot when you're out there. I was hitting some drivers off the deck just for shits and gigs. Pretty nice. Saw an old friend we used to work with. He's got a thriving business out there at the course shout out to him saturday night didn't do anything watched ufc we ordered food in i watched some guys get head kicked it was phenomenal yesterday very low-key little gym sesh

just relaxed watched golf was really pulling for for Scott Stallings. Love Scott Stallings. Didn't work out. What an unsexy leaderboard yesterday I was. Yeah. I'm out on the PGA Tour. Sucks. Wow. Blood money. Had the U.S. amateur not been borderline unwatchable because of previously mentioned goatee and

pace of play, I would have watched that. But instead I just- Was it ever close? When I turned it on, it was- Yeah. He was already- It became a little closer at the end okay that's all i got i didn't i didn't finish it sunday night just a good tv night watch the

man tie teo doc we will be breaking down today on too much dip also did uh game of thrones or what do they call it house of dragons house of the dragon house of the dragon dragging these nuts across your face do you want to put on your headphones and listen to third eye blind or whatever the wallflowers you guys can just straight up talk about it if you want to i'm not gonna watch it here's my take i enjoyed it that's that's fuego how was it dylan i enjoyed it. That's... That's fuego. How was it, Dylan? I enjoyed it too, man. How long was it?

Hour five. Hour five. Once a week. It's not like Netflix. They don't release them all at once. You got to be patient. Netflix doesn't do that shit either anymore. They don't?

I don't know. Stranger Things, I felt like they were releasing the six episodes and then doing the other one okay shut up just watch the show nah you guys come on these dragons are dope hey at the end of road swim lessons we do the hokey pokey that's what it's all about water and it's it's we have to all sing it and uh i'm actually singing it and i feel like that's a big step in the right direction for me as someone who famously doesn't say a namaste with the group after yoga class for me to sing hokey pokey it's really showing growth i miss my joke should have gotten a lot no no i i thought of that joke didn't say it because i was like i should have gotten a

lot somebody will tweet you like dude they wronged you for not laughing at that. I know, and they'll be right. Yeah, that hokey pokey joke you did was so good. That's what it's all about. Your boy did something on Friday night that he regrets doing. On Friday night, I finished the bottle of bourbon that Dave gave me for having a child. And I'm sad because it's been my favorite bottle of bourbon I've ever had. The one that he boxed me out on.

Yeah. It feels like I had it for a really long time and I was really enjoying it. Shout out Russell's Reserve. And I was just really savoring that thing. And I did the thing where I started pouring myself a drink and I started to realize soon that there's not two drinks left in here. There's only one. You got to pour it all out and just have a stiff boy.

Yeah. Sucked. I was so bummed. So now I'm on the hunt for a new bourbon high end that I can sip when I'm feeling fancy. If anyone out there has any ideas, feel free to let your boy know. My dad informed me that he's no longer drinking Woodford. He's on Knobs Creek. Hell yeah.

My dad's a Knobs Creek guy. My dad was drinking Yellowstone whiskey when I was up in Michigan. You guys see this stuff? Honestly, it was pretty good. I enjoyed it. Hey, that Mezcal bar, there's a grand opening tomorrow night. Vince Stratman and I are going.

Oh, thanks for the afterthought invite, man. He texted me because I can just walk over. You want to come? I'll skateboard over. Free bites, free drinks. Dave, swing through. I can't. We're actually doing a bourbon launch at the saloon. We're launching the Dick Reserve.

It's good. Oh, I can't miss that. No. Okay, I'm going to have to cancel on Ben. Don't we have one called Knob Freak? No, it's Knob Leak. What are y'all doing? Comedy for a show that we're doing.

You should come through. Not good, but we're doing you should come through not good but we're doing it maybe if can i get an actual invite instead of a oh dude yeah okay uh saturday i did something no one's doing can we call that an oh dude from now on yeah like it's a shitty invite it's a pity invite it's like oh awkward oh dude you should come to this you hit a coffee shop during the day i had tried their breakfast tacos yeah i heard vegan by the way oh cool that totally is a selling point for me it is meatless monday they have tacos that have like like bacon and egg so i was like what do you guys use in place of and she was like oh the egg is uh just egg i was like i don't know what that means she's like yeah that's the brand of the,

I was like, I still like, what is the actual- It seems like a deceptive trade practice. She didn't have an answer for it. Yeah. I have dabbled in vegetarianism. I'm actually kind of pro-vegetarianism. I like it. I like how I feel on it. I enjoy it, but I do enjoy eating meat as well. So- It's the ridicule that we would give you. Yeah. And to be honest, I do have a lot of vegetarian meals these days, but I don't like going to places that are intentionally vegetarian or vegan or anything like that because I still like having the option to eat some meat.

I hear you, man. Saturday, I went out to Micah's. You guys hear about this Mortgage Micah guy? I went out to Micah's house in the drip, Dripping Springs. Had an absolute blast. Micah grilled some tacos for me and they were an absolute delight. We went steak tacos. He grilled some onions,

grilled some vegetables to toss up on there. Just a really, really good situation. And then on Sunday, I did something I didn't expect to do last night. I played 15 holes of golf. I've never done a Sunday evening round of golf before. Traditionally, there are 18 holes total.

Yeah. Famously. Lions famously closes their doors 15 minutes after sunset, and so I had to get off the course. But it was kind of an impromptu little session. I kind of like the Sunday evening golf move. Yeah, I did start with a triple. Will's slow starts are continuing.

Not happy about it. Where'd you put your tee shot under the trees? Yeah, I pulled it. I pulled it, David. Um, it's a tough opening hole.

To be honest, I had a really good recovery shot over the trees and under the back of the green. And I chunked three straight chips. Not sure how that's what happened to putting will. It wasn't a putting scenario unfortunately i was kind of you know that's not the putting will i know yeah no it was brutal puff from anywhere uh i did not watch any house of dragons house of dragon houses of dragons or house of

dragon this damon guy he's bad news the one from shark tank he's in the he's in the crown right he's got a he's got like a his face he's bad dude man he just wants to kill oh yeah oh yeah he's the guy prince philip dude hardcore he's the one who just died right yeah real life well i have a theory he died five years ago and they've just been shuttling his cadaver around for a while but yes he is officially dead oh yeah hey that's a lot of work you look pretty rough in the back of those vehicles he was being driven around i watched the princess diana documentary on uh netflix or on hbo which i'm sure alissa has has watched already i think i watched that one it's fucking depressing

shout out to the paparazzi for killing her and also the royal family for also killing her. Anybody else? Hard to say. Hear about our friends over at Chime? I always wonder.

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and some users' scores may not improve. But again, head over to Chime.com slash name. Make it happen. Every once in a while, the perfect story comes up on the timeline. I'm okay. Did you swallow something incorrectly? I was making a credit joke, and then I just choked. I bet Dylan's credit's trash, dude.

What's your score? 781. I'm recovering from the hit I took recently. Imagine discussing that publicly really your credit app like tells you that like it rebounds from your workout this morning and tells you what your credit score is oh my gosh can we just get to the fucking story i was near death okay but my miracle care was guinness with raw eggs. This is so stupid. This is season two of The Wire. That's the breakfast of the dock workers.

Is it really? Just slonks with beer. A retired pub landlady and former nurse in England credits her mixture of ingredients for keeping her alive, including the time she was hours away from the afterlife. Maggie Ives, 78, was a resident of a sheltered living facility in Malvern, Worcester. Hold on.

She's only 78? Yeah, like you're not even that old, lady. Calm down, lady. Also, like, do they need to say what's a sheltered living facility versus an unsheltered? All this Guinness is probably shortening your lifespan at this point. A bunch of old people standing in a field? That would be a bad retirement community. That's one that I would not want to live in.

We were all getting hypothermia from the rain where is this in england yeah she said i can't even tell you what hospital i was in damn she must have been down bad all i can tell you is there was 22 weeks i kept coming and going slipping in and out of consciousness she had chronic kidney pain and cardiovascular stuff but now guess what she's just slamming slonks and putting down pints with the lads slamming slonks yeah for those out there who don't know what a slonker is it's a raw egg have you got have you guys ever drank a raw egg before yes for some reason at high school that was occasionally a thing people did at parties just crack one in a beer and chug the beer have you ever fucking crazy have you ever done one to cure hangover no you can do an egg i don't know how to say the next word i'm gonna say so i'm gonna rush through it and hope that no one notices that i don't know how to say it so you do an egg and then you do

Worcestershire sauce and then you do some cracked black pepper and you just drink that slunker on down i did it one time and i think it did help did help. I feel like that would make me vomit, I think. Did you just describe a Bloody Mary? No, because there's nothing else in it besides a slunk. None of those things are in a Bloody Mary. Bloody Pepper? Okay, that's it. Worcester?

Worcester? Okay. Worcester Shire. Not an egg. Worcester. Famously. Sure. Well, what stopped you from having one cracked in there?

What are you talking about, dog? Vodka's a main ingredient. Maybe it's just a Mary. No tomato sauce? No vodka? Fuck out of here, dude. Zing zang. Tomato sauce.

Dylan's making his Bloody Marys with ragu. Tomato juice. He picked up some Rouse marinara. Dylan's mood just turned. Let's change the subject let's get mad when i after i pour the the spaghetti sauce into the pan there's always some leftover on the rim and i'll i like i lick it that's fine i love i love pasta that's fine dude you're that i'm not gonna shame you i make mine from scratch i don't i don't do canned sauce yeah i had your scampi i learned it uh my time back in the old country you did you guys

watch the bear yet no i'm probably not going to man you probably should why because it's one of the most hyped television shows i've seen in a really long time it backed up it backed it up it is on my list question please watch it there's three shows that i was dialed to watch the rehearsal which i have one more left the bear and the old man and I said I don't know what

any of these are about this is two weeks ago I'm gonna watch all three I gave up on the old man you were so high on the old man you were so high on it the first episode

is like this is gonna be the best show I've ever seen in my life and then it just it gets too convoluted and then like too like they ain't even fucking talking not enough explosions

the action slows down it's just they just kind of they wrote episode one and they knew they crushed it the night of symptoms like now what the syndrome exactly it's like the night of sometimes the symptom is the syndrome the bear gets uh i don't the bear maintains their high level of um everything all right they're just back there cooking up shit in the kitchen what's going on yeah that's facts all right are they whipping up a scampi for the boys no they just do slunkers it's a slunk show not really a lot of prep in the slunks it's just raw eggs yep yep it's easy if you're gonna do a raw egg doing it with a guinness is probably a great move well Well, this is kind of just like breakfast because a Guinness is the closest beer you have to coffee. It's got a lot of flavonoids.

Yeah. And then the eggs are just obviously breakfast food. 78. Call me when you're 108. Well, it's because she had some kind of other issue, Dylan. Can you be a little sensitive to our girls? What's her other issue? She said when I...

She apparently had... I don't know. Wait, Dave, did you see the paragraph about the scampi? Did we talk about that already? She didn't say. From the article. I don't know what that is. Can I read it, Dylan?

I found it. You have to read an old woman voice. I can't fault the staff here from the laundry lady to the cleaners and from the carers to the management. What's her name? Evas said. Whatever food I want, I order. If I want scampi every day, I have scampi every day. She had it.

I like that you're calling it scampi now. It is scampi. I crushed it. That's how they say it at the home later. Did I not crush that? You did. Back in the old country. Good for her.

Hey, somebody get this old broad some fucking scompy. What doctors are like, yeah, I want scompy. Is there going to be a doctor that steps in and says like, well, this. Yeah, you're flirting with disaster here, lady. You might want to chill out on the scompy and the. If you're her doctor, are you annoyed? Are you sitting there reading this article and you're just like what's okay elaine or whatever your name is like what's your fucking problem like i told you to stop drinking so much this

is not medical like you've got to stop it's not elaine it's maggie maggie she said whatever food i want i order wake up maggie i think i got some slonkers to serve to you if i want scampi is like guys and we got a bunch of guinness that were so now hold on this old lady has gone from a nice old english lady to whatever you were just doing it kind of sounded like that's my old bag of bones voice. It sounded like a bag of bones in the Midwest. She said, when I made it through the night, I asked the staff if I could try an old recipe of mine.

And recipe, I will say, she's using very loosely here. When I used to feel rough years ago, I'm a great believer in raw eggs and Guinness. I swear by it, she said. You don't even taste the eggs at all. You just swallow them down. I've been doing that for quite a long time. All right. Now we're talking. Let just swallow them down. I've been doing that for quite a long time. All right.

Chill out. Okay, now we're talking. Take it easy, Maggie. Let's go, Maggie. We're getting somewhere. Not that different than an oyster. Texture-wise. It's a texture play.

It's not. No, it's the oyster of the chicken. Some guy died from oysters in Florida. Did you see that story? We should probably talk about that. Why do you die? I don't like talking about people that die. Okay, it's fair.

We like talking about people who don't die. Yeah. Because they eat swans and beer. Wait. Mercury poisoning? I don't know. I didn't read it. Oh.

I think it was a bacteria. Dude, you know your boy loves raw oysters. They're fine. No, they're perfect. Dude, they're fine. No, I're fine. No, they're perfect. Dude, they're fine. No, I love them. No, they're okay. The Florida Department of Health says 26 people in the state this year have become infected with the bacteria,

and six of them died eating raw shellfish, including oysters. In 2021, 10 people died out of 34 people sickened. Sheesh. I'm a little worried that I'm developing some sort of allergy. Do you want me to elaborate sure i had a really itchy core lately itchy core itchy core no i got that itchy core like the outs like the skin you're epidermis yes i have no signs of anything on my actual skin that shows that i should be itching but i have had a very itchy core for the last six days.

I don't want to get into your private life, but are you moisturizing properly? So Dave, I went to the dermatologist, not for this reason, just to get my skin checked, which everybody should be doing. Do you guys have a dermatology appointment on the books at any point? No. I do, but it's to make my hair grow back. Oh, that works. So luckily it fell over the time when i began itching and she told me she's like i don't know thanks she gave me some uh some lotion to put on and i have to say the look she didn't tell me how aggressive this lotion uh would how aggressively it would make my body feel numb what's the ingredient i've become so numb that's your that's will skin that's me after i've applied

her lotion live look at will's epidermis so yeah she said she said i might be developing an allergy to something it's scaring me what if i'm allergic to scompy i'm worried about you man did you have scompy recently i don't know you were very close to me when i had my scampi i'm wondering what the scomping circumstances are hmm i had some good scampi when i was in capri i remember so good this is a psa to anyone out there that might become friends with dylan i'm paired with a nice rolo if you ever want to see the most insufferable version of villain go to olive garden with him where he will talk about his trip to italy for the entire time it's a great it's a great bit everyone loved it our waiter really enjoyed it you did as he's spilling will's drink on him not all of it he only dribbled a little water on me it was but it was weird just a little it was enough to where he

should have addressed it but i don't think he did you had seven breadsticks no no no no no i counted the final count i actually had a tweet queued up that i deleted because i was like this is dumb you're gonna go for my my like my jason's deli i was gonna say i was gonna say because i did as as one does i did endless breadsticks uh salad soup and soup and i was gonna put my count for everything. And I had bowls of soup, two, plates of salad, one, breadsticks. And I was going to do 3.333 repeating. And I was just going to do all the threes until I had no characters left on my tweet. I don't know why I found that entertaining, but I holstered the tweet. It was not a good tweet. I don't want to embarrass anybody.

That would have stunk, man. Somebody in here didn't know the soup is the perfect food quote was a Bill Simmons, and they've been thinking it was just a Will original the entire time. How do you think that I thought soup was a perfect food? I remembered it was Bill Simmons right after it was brought up. I wasn't like sitting on that one, like, oh, Will has this crazy take. I think there are some soups out there that you could make a case that they might be close to a perfect food, But it's Italian wedding.

The best soup is still made. My dad makes some amazing Italian wedding soup. Tortilla soup. My dad also makes a very good leek soup. He leekin'. Oh, she leekin'. It's at Knob Creek. I don't know.

It's a callback. You want me to explain it? I don't know It's a callback You want me to explain it? I don't know What time's the bourbon This woman's alive Launch party at the Dick's Saloon Think Maggie'll be there? It's at high noon, cowboy

Do we have Guinness and eggs for her? Right in the middle of town square We're not having Austin doesn't have a town square Why wouldn't we have it at the Dick's Saloon? We're doing it in green Oh That's fitting Maybe we're gonna it in green oh yeah that's fitting

man we're gonna go down to the gristmill the gristmill yeah we're actually we're opening up a new place down there it's called the gristmill oh really what happens there oh you just we just slonkers all day serving them up uncooked to your liking. Okay. I'll stop by, man. Yep. We're also launching a sister bourbon. It's called Wood Reserve. Really?

It's complimentary, cowboy. Okay. We'll leave the light on for you. Just order one stiff wood reserve. It's the only way we serve it. Okay. Shout out to this lady for living. Yeah. I got bad news for Maggie.

Living past 78? No, that's impressive. She's got some crazy hair. People do this all the time. Yeah. Why does she got a story about her yeah the new york post they you go sometimes you wonder if they're struggling for content you go track down any 78 78 year old anywhere and they've got something worth sharing probably like yeah if i talked to my mom my mom's not 78 she's like 73 like if i talked to her and was like what's your key to like living she'd be like i don't know walking yeah dude oh that makes sense i think her key is just dropping fire on the

gram yeah no be careful dave what i don't know no she just don't want people following my mom oh she posted some good some good clips that's all please don't follow anything please don't follow my immediate family uh she let she does react to every single story, though. Do you guys get that treatment? She reacts to everything. She's a real one for that. She loves it. Yeah, she loves it.

Hey, guys, if I could pop back in, I've got one more. We've got a brother bourbon we're launching. It's called Jack Daniel. Really? Our lawyers are dealing with some IP issues. issues yeah i would think that'd be problematic jack daniel he says you get it that's disgusting yeah shots of daniel though but now a word from our sponsor better help life throws you curveballs sometimes sometimes you have trouble knocking them out of the park

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of online therapy at betterhelp.com slash circling. Frat's gone rogue. Frat's gone rogue. Oh, is this the frat minute? Frat's gone rogue frats gone rogue it was just a frat minute frats going rogue dylan go ahead drop this one in the group minute this is this one's ufg if i would have dropped this into the uh the writers group the tfn writers group in like 2014 people would just be jumping on it left and right you know what the fighting it. Do you know what my favorite move was in the writers' groups? It was finding a story and tagging the specific writer

and being like, dude, you're going to knock this out of the park. Perfect for you. Do it. This has blah, blah, blah written all over it. And then that person's like, I'm pretty busy. I can't get to this for another four days. You're like, cool. All right.

We'll have somebody else do it. Why don't you quit your job instead of just write 25 we'll have yeah dude you're about to get paid 25 us dollars for this article yeah and if it pops off maybe we'll give you a little more probably not right anyway there's uh some frat news if you guys want to hear about it what's your frat news yeah what oh wow um it turns out that um some fraternities at usc this is southern cal or is it south carolina day southern cal it's los angeles okay i see it sounds like you've read it um they have what disaffiliated from usc what is this the protest lincoln riley they're on their bad boy shit. They're going rogue. Eight.

Forming their new council, David. So it's a rebellion. Mm-hmm. Just what people really want to hear, like the aggrieved fraternities just rebelling. Their ox is getting gored. So you know what? We got to come together in some sense. My favorite line from this, if I had to choose, it's a paragraph really,

not a line, but it says, from the LA Times, rap and house music blasted from speakers. The guy shot hoops and lobbed a volleyball in a sandpit and on the sidewalk,

perspective and current fraternity members traded notes. This one had free burritos, one said to two young men next to him. Just guys being dudes right there.

That is a vibe yeah burritos uh yeah send me up volleyball hoops and burritos that's the trifecta man the biggest mail-in was just ordering pizzas for rush i don't remember like food being available some although i did skip rush famously to go deaf hunting yeah that's right how many do you kill you max out i always maxed out dog um so like when you disaffiliate you can't you can't use the school and you can't talk about being a part of the school you can't use the logos and stuff so you just does that affect anybody i don't know no but i will say like if there was one that was not affiliated with the school but still like supported by the actual fraternity i'd be like

yeah i'm gonna go with that one that sounds great it does sound a lot sketchier yeah there was uh teak was famously not on campus well they, they say if you can't go Greek. That's right. Shout out to Teak. I have a few friends from Teak. They were some good dudes. Fuck Pike, though. Yeah, they were bottom tier.

Fuck. Pike wasn't even there. Their house was haunted, too. Oh, dude, yeah. Haunted as fuck. That shit was crazy. Spooky season. We should do a spooky season documentary. We need a frat episode.

We need a frat episode we need a frat episode of spooky season this house i can make that happen a concept this house would have rocked your shit your fucking shit would have been wrong your shit like completely rocked okay i don't think you it was an abandoned understand it was abandoned dude i can only react so much when i have no clue what's i've abandoned my house i've abandoned the lodge they flattened that at some point it burned oh that's right apparently there were some some pledges inside too no and they're still wasn't their spirits still live some people who were um so what the pledges were smoking weed inside of this place why is this such a big deal no so apparently this house was built on top of an old um what was it dave i think there was like a morgue in

the basement or some shit like that like straight up straight up dead bodies and so the house was abandoned like it was shut down because it was too dangerous like the floors were caving in and shit so there's just like this old abandoned like plantation style house with like a morgue in the basement basically like right outside of town in san marcos i guess it burned not like that oh like burned down yeah damn did you guys have any of those like there was a place on this back road and in michigan that we drive by and everyone was like yeah that that's where they keep the bodies during the winter time when it's too the ground is too hard to bury on i'm pretty sure

that's not what this thing was but like every time we drove by it was like oh i thought they just weekend at bernie's remember that place outside of town here they they take bodies cadavers cadavers good word is a good word and they um it's like a dean cop decomposition study that they do they'll have these bodies like sitting out on on the ground like in cages and shit are you an organ donor yeah in his 20s yeah stop david david david are you an organ donor david i don't know. I should know that. I apologize to whoever gets my organs. I haven't been taking that creative.

What? I take all my shit. Man, I'll tell you this, man. I'll tell you what I told my wife. I ain't drinking anymore, but I ain't drinking any less. I don't know how that applies here, but that's cool. They're organ failure, things of that nature. Oh, organ failure.

We're talking about a donor. Oh, correct, correct. Sorry. I think organ's biggest failure was losing out on some recruits this season. Wow. An organ, the spookiest instrument there is, by the way.

An organ? Were you just doing the Daddy, Would You Like Some Sausage? Yeah. I was playing an invisible organ. Dylan watched Freddie got fingered for the first time this weekend. What'd you think of it?

That's not true. What'd you think of Rip Torn's performance? Don't know who that is. I remember like thinking, I feel like they can get away with a lot more like bad hazing if they're not affiliated with the school. And I think that's, that's why I was always kind of like,

yeah, I'd probably be less inclined to sign up. There's a pledge i think you guys are so fucked okay jade you guys are so fucked i'm gonna put a pledge the g dude like gdi dude being a jade is actually tight because you can go to any fraternity party you want so you're essentially in every frat. Nah, you're a GDI dog. Yeah, that's facts. That is big facts. Hey, speaking of GDI shit, you guys want to hear about this new candle from Chipotle? Yeah.

Is this a new addition to the rundown? Dude, fuck these people. Fuck Chipotle. Wow, what do they do, dog? Are they doing a scary? Nah, yeah, they're doing a candle that's for... See, they're kind of... I almost feel like they're fucking with Ross at this point.

Because they're doing a candle that's a water cup candle that's i think it's yeah it smells like lemonade and so they're kind of doing a little hat tip to the people who uh put lemonade in their their water cup oh do you think next like they're gonna have like a lighter that you burnt that you light up on and it's just like the napkins that are stolen that would be a direct attack at ross ball did they ever cut the check i don't think so i don't think a shirt with the burrito was dope i've always thought that if you're trying to get money from a company you shouldn't encourage that people steal things from the company you shouldn't harass to get the bag you don't understand guerrilla warfare yeah i mean you can make a case that maybe if you steal enough from the company that they will finally say like we have to stop the bleeding in some way but i just don't know if

napkins are the way to go from chipotle it was podcast terrorism yeah yeah what do you what's randy gillen about speaking of the mike randall just the whole chipotle situation they were stealing like tabasco bottles too. Dude, we don't condone that. I don't condone that. I don't know. That green Tabasco does go kind of dummy hard though. Oh, don't want Chipotle.

No, I can't. I got to record later. That's the issue. I got nachos in the fridge. You can have one. I'm all right. I don't need your handout. Dude, I saw this video the other day.

They actually interviewed the guy who came up with the nachos joke. Have you seen no i saw that dude crazy how'd they locate that one dude he was like it's nacho cheese shout out to our good friend dj bean of the brunch podcast is he up for an oscar for that yet dude he absolutely crushed it dj is really getting out there i love it you've seen this the bear show no da bear what's up with this candle i don't know i'm gonna fucking fight someone over chipotle i have to keep releasing candles you can't just get mad at every company that drops a candle what if they cut the check though to me i don't know why chipotle would go through me in order to like do a candle deal unless they like i don't think they need to license anything i would be in trouble if we had a chipotle

sponsorship yeah i do like chipotle i don't like how it makes me feel even when i try to avoid the things that i think are making me feel bad there's nothing i can do it's the beans dude i think it's just salt and beans yeah yeah i think i'm thinking i'm starting a restaurant that just serves stuff that makes me feel good and chipotle is not that and at this restaurant we are going to have two things we're gonna have a refrigerator where we store our slokers and we're going to have one beer tap that has just Guinness on tap. Yeah. I completely understand wanting to have a nice stout Guinness with my Chipotle or whatever the Chipotle will lay. You can live past 78 years old.

No one has ever lived past 80 eating only chipotle i i would eat chipotle more if uh the parking lot at our chipotle down the street from us didn't absolutely suck it's a bad parking lot it's a real problem we have on lamar in general you got these you got these construction workers who pull in and they're badass trucks and they take up all the room and you can't pull in there are a lot of badass trucks in that lot dude it's that and that parking lot is not built for bad-ass trucks. That's something people don't realize when they move to Austin. Like because every other house on your block is under construction, people were wanting to flip and get in on this.

There are so many just like big dog trucks. Like it's F there's F like multiple F two fifties on my street right now. Dude, when I bought my car down here when i moved to texas i had to buy a car and bid um i went to the dealership and the guy goes all right what kind of truck we setting you up with and i was like i am not getting a truck sir i know i'm a dude wait where was this and i know i'm at a car max he looked he gave you once one look over this is a truck i was like dude i'm not getting a truck. Where's your Ford Fusion section? Where do you use Ford Fusions?

Because I'll take one single crumb of those, sir. Did you think every male in Texas drove a truck at that point? Yes. No. Well, I already thought that. And then when I walked in, he goes, all right, what kind of truck are we setting you up with? I was like, not. You rolled out in a Fuge, man.

Yeah. This is pre-beard will, too. It totally blew his mind. He was devastated when he saw my eyes turn over to the marooned 2005 Ford Fusion. He did have a 2013 Ford Fusion that was ripe for the taking, but given my financial situation, I wasn't sure what to do. So I went with the 2005, the vintage model. You were sick with that car, though.

Dude, that thing was so sick. The turn radius on that made it really hard to do U-turns in legal u-turn scenarios you used to ghost ride that bitch yeah i remember that yeah i can't believe you got those subs um installed in the back though yeah 15s that's aggressive when you put those spinners on it i was like it doesn't seem like a good investment i know but when i saw like the finished product i got it he was dripping candy paint all over the lot. I remember that. Yeah, the landlord had to say something like, dude, people are slipping.

He was like, most people wait until the paint dries before they leave the paint shop, but not Will. That's the thing. It just never dried. That's facts. My whip is so clean. Yeah. You kept it real clean. I was bored yesterday.

I thought about getting a car wash then i looked at the uh i looked at the old uh forecast big weather out there it ain't the week for it man i was like man if you're a car wash you just shut down for the week when it's like this what happens i don't know i don't think i don't think staying open is worth it you've got like the vacuums people can clean out the inside it's like they their kid puke or some shit kids puke okay you know you can't vacuum up the puke no you scoop that out it's a scoop sitch you ever puked in an uber i haven't no i haven't thrown up since high school at all yeah like not not i'm not talking drinking like you haven't gotten sick you haven't you

haven't gotten food poisoning you haven't gotten food poisoning? You haven't eaten a sweet green? Dude, my stomach is just built diffy. I don't think I've gotten enough credit from you lately for having a stomach that is actually enduring. You're doing great, man. I used to complain about it all the time, and I've stopped, and you haven't given me credit where credit's due. Remember that time we both picked up food from Fresa's, and you got a tummy ache, and I was just dunking on you on the tl because i was like totally healthy i don't remember that yeah it happened i don't remember this it was just dunking all over your you remember the time that we tried to go to fresas for lunch and then the weight was like 30 minutes and it was hot outdoor

people were complaining about their food so we just left if you're if you're if you're a restaurant don't let people rent out the inside when it's 100 degrees outside. Really isolate the rest of your customers. I'd like to know more about who was having a private event on that Monday. It's unnecessary. That wasn't a Monday.

Or was it? I don't know. Hey, sorry. Today is, if you can't tell. I got a case of it. Oh my God. How was everyone's Sunday Scaries last night? tell. I got a case of it. Oh, my God. How was everyone's Sunday scaries last night? Oh, I needed a Chipotle candle.

I'm sorry. Chipotle is sounding better and better, and I'm a little worried that this segment came at the wrong time because now I feel like I'm just going to leave the studio. I'm going to go get – I'm going to Papalote. I'm going to get tacos. I'll go get tacos. I have nachos in the fridge, man.

Are they yours? Dude. tacos i'll go get tacos i have nachos in the fridge man are they yours dude we gotta end we got in on that dude hat tip dj yeah we got it yeah that's fun man shut up nice talking to you guys yeah see you guys on tuesday thank you jack bye daniel Thank you, Jack. Bye. Daniel. you