Circling Back - Pole Assassin's Monkey & JFK Jr. Does Dallas

Episode Date: November 3, 2021

Will successfully returns from Cabeza Watch to discuss all things Pole Assassin and her monkey, the JFK Jr. rally in Dallas, Dillon’s pinkies falling off because of how he holds his phone, This Weekend in Fun, and more. Support us on Patreon and receive weekly episodes for as low $5 per month: www.patreon.com/circlingbackpodcast Purchase a Circling Back Candle: www.vellabox.com/circling-back Watch all of our full episodes on YouTube: www.youtube.com/washedmedia Shop Washed Merch: www.washedmedia.shop (0:00) Fun & Easy Banter (16:55) Pole Assassin’s Monkey (37:55) JFK Jr. Alive In Dallas? (48:48) Dillon’s Pinkies Falling Off (59:55) This Weekend in Fun (1:09:15) Brett’s Breaking News Support This Episode’s Sponsors Rhoback: www.rhoback.com (BACKER20 for 20% off) Birddogs: www.birddogs.com (STEAM) Keeps: www.keeps.com/steam (First Month FREE) Solo Stove: www.solostove.com (STEAM for $10 off) Liquid IV: www.liquidiv.com (CIRCLINGBACK for 25% off) --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/circling-back/message Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

All right, we're back. Circling Back podcast presented by Rowback, where you can get 20% off your first order using backer 20. My name's Will DeFreeze. My left, David Ruff. Still processing this Aaron Rogers news, man. I'm sorry. It's okay, dude. I get it. Yeah, really kind of changes the dynamic in the NFC. I mean, how does this affect the Lions going forward? Not sure. We throw the record book out every game we play now. Really? Yeah.

It's because we're 0-8. Did Matt Stafford ever beat Aaron Rodgers? Yes. Come on, man. It's a valid question. Come on, man. It's a valid question. Come on.

I guess if you play that much, he's going to get a couple. I think Kitna beat Rodgers once. Could be wrong. Kitna was a gamer, man. Love Kitna beat Rogers once. Could be wrong. Kitna was a gamer, man. Loved Kitna. I thought about wearing my Kitna jersey to spooky season at one point, but I turned against it. There were no sleeves on it.

I didn't know what I would be. Oh, yeah. You removed the sleeves off of your John Kitna jersey at some point, presumably while partying, celebrating. I think we just thought – I don't know how we acquired said Kitna jersey at some point, presumably while partying, celebrating. I think we just thought, I don't know how we acquired said Kitna jersey, but I think we just accepted as a group that a Kitna jersey should be sleeveless. Yeah, I think most people would agree with that. At least those from the Detroit area.

Detroit. Yeah. I just feel that it's interesting. We've made it almost two minutes into this episode, and no one has mentioned the fact that I am back on my bullshit with the shacket. What are y'all doing? I thought that was just a shirt. What are you doing?

I genuinely didn't notice. Is that a shirt or is that a shacket? It's the same shacket. The interesting thing about this article of clothing is that it can be worn as a shirt or a jacket. It's wild. So are you going to maybe pivot to a new one? Or are you going to run that one back this year? Yeah, that one's starting to smell a little bit.

I've thought about that. And while I might purchase a new one, this one is perfect in every sense of the word perfect. I can't top it. So no matter what I'm doing, I'm downgrading. It's just, I don't know. I might just rock with this for a while because it's been rocking with me. Well, I tell you this that's that's a cool story and that's

cool but all birds um is up on the day following their ipo so if you want to get in on that action i don't stock market y'all know i might be out on the sneakers but i might start wearing all birds apparel i'm absolutely start wearing Allbirds apparel. I'm absolutely out here. They do apparel now? Yeah. Yeah, they specialize in manufacturing eco-friendly wool shoes. But they also do apparel.

Eco-friendly mid-shoes, more like. Come on. Come on. Damn. When's the last time you washed that jacket? Oh, it's clean. I keep that thing on me. I keep it clean.

What thing? Yeah. Washer and dryer? Yeah. I do have a washer and dryer at home, actually. Where is it in your house? Is it garage or? It's in the laundry room.

The laundry room. Adjacent to the kitchen. My dude has a whole room dedicated to laundry. I know. It's pretty cool. I miss the days of my apartment having the stacked washer dryer in the bathroom so I could pull the warm towel out. We have it in the bathroom, but we have the issue where both our washer, they're not stacked, but the washer and dryer,

they open the same way. Yeah. And so it makes the transfer from the washer to the dryer quite difficult. And I didn't care before we had a child, and my laundry quadrupled. The only stacks I know about are just Benjamins. Did you miss this? I was thinking this morning, my one regret about going on vacation is that I didn't miss more episodes. You should plan it better next time. Yeah, I'm never planning it over a weekend again.

I need to miss more. God, I feel like I was just here listening to... Did you listen to too much Dip yesterday? Probably not. It was sick, dude. A bunch of weed references. It was fun. He catches the live stream.

Dude, I think I'm the most dedicated... I think I've watched more live streams than anybody... any other Dipper out there. Dipper. Dude, I'm just catching... Fritz is logging hours on the live streams. any other dipper out there. Dipper. Dude, I'm just catching. Fritz is logging hours on the live streams. Really? Yeah.

Yeah, I had to put some earphones on him for the Duda episode. But other than that, he really enjoys it. He's a big KJ guy. What were you worried about? Like him saying he would F a dolphin or something? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, it was the whole dolphin F-ing part.

That makes sense. It's the dolphin F effing for me. How do you explain to your kid that a guy, a podcaster, wants to eff a dolphin? Like, how are you supposed to explain that to your kid? It's tough. We had him on Circling Back, and he talked about having the ass of a 10-year-old boy or something. Yeah. It was just uncomfortable.

I just skipped over that one. I was like, I can't do this anymore. I'm sorry I brought it up again. It's okay. Shots all the asses out there, though. Oh, my God. Right, right, right. Did you guys miss me on Monday?

What did you guys talk about Monday? A little bit. Was it a good episode? What did we do? It was honestly really good, yeah. We had fun. I always feel bad when i'm like gone and i see chatter it's like dude is the show better without will like dude stop don't say that don't confirm what i'm already going in for your spot that's fine that's fine if i'm gonna

get cucked by kj i'm fine with that podcast cucked just to be crystal clarifies yeah just to be just really get it clear wow the new internet party just dropped speaking of yeah yeah they're talking nike getting into virtual goods a 600 knife non-stop nut november that seems very on brand for them yeah it is no nut it's non-stop nut so you just can't stop the internet party yeah and that would be a bummer just a month-long nut? That'd be mega. Like, kind of cool, but also really annoying. I think you'd get tired of it after a while.

I feel like you wouldn't get much done outside of nutting. Right. Like, are there, do you think there's, like, Astros fans, like, participating in nonstop nut, and they're just, like, they were, like, bums last night, but also, like, you know what? Could be worse. Could be not nutting.

Right. How do you explain to your kid what nonstop nut November is? I don't think you do. Yeah. I think you let them figure that out. You just wait until they get a Reddit account. They'll figure it out. Listen to Internet Party.

One of the two. I forgot about. What's the no shave November? Movember. november november yeah we're in it are people doing that still look at me dog you think i've shaved in a minute i haven't i guess not i look like hell right now it's kind of great i think you look better with a mustache really i'm not saying you look bad with the beard but i i think i'm i think the mustache is my favorite version of you i didn didn't expect you to go Fu Manchu. I didn't go Fu Manchu. You were in stage one of Fu.

I'm letting the beard catch up to the mustache. There's a big downward fang on either side of the mouth. Well, that's part of the reason why I got scared to do my lasso costume for Halloween, because I was scared that I was going to shave the mustache incorrectly and just have to botch it all together and then have bare face. Oh yeah, you, you were supposed to shave that. Yeah, I didn't though. Are you glad because it was the most chuggy costume of Halloween? Like Mitt Romney did it. Yeah, I don't really care. Like in terms of like people criticizing other people for, um, doing popular Halloween costumes,

I just don't care. Like, I just don't dress up. I don't like dressing up in the first place. So the fact that I'm even willing to do it on Halloween is big for me. And so when people do that, I'm always just like, okay, I don't know what to do. Someone gave me shit one time for being Michael J. Fox

in Back to the Future. That's a cool... I was like, I feel like I was doing something good here. And like, and like, you're just raining on the parade of the costume that I clearly put effort into. I have my costume in my bag right here. I never got to wear. Yet you've been saying, I'm going to wear it tomorrow for three days in a row.

I'll change right now. You literally said you're going to wear it today. I'll put it on right now. That's fine, but it would have made more sense to do it before the show. I'll step out of frame. You just want to get shirtless on camera. No, I'll step out of frame. We don't want that.

We might get flagged on YouTube. I know. It'd be kind of hot. No. Can't be popping top mid-pod. We can. Dude, I went as thick will, though. People wanted that.

That was good. I think I had People wanted that. That was good. I think I had a better costume. That was good. Not many people can pull off dressing as themselves, but you did it. People really enjoyed Thick Will, and I was like, I'm just going to bring it back. You and Steve Buscemi pulled it off. What did he do? Did he dress as himself?

Dressed as himself from that show. Oh, he did the meme. Yeah. How are you doing? Oh, that's good. I don't know what publicist told him to do that, but good for him. He embraced the meme quite like Zuckerberg. I feel like you're disrespecting Steve Buscemi in that comment.

Why? You're saying that a publicist told him to do it? Yeah. I feel like Steve Buscemi, I give him the benefit of the doubt that he could have came up with that idea. He's Steve Buscemi. Is he the kind of guy who's aware of social trends? I think he's... I think so.

Okay. He's also, or was, a volunteer firefighter. That's very cool. Are you saying I disrespected the firefighters? Yeah, that's actually where I'm going with this. You have got... The first responders in general, you've been really... Your Prop A takes.

No, I'm kidding. Talk about disrespecting firefighters. Am I right? Is there a Buscemi apparel line? This can't be... It's called Buscemi, but I'm going to assume that Steve Buscemi is not a part of this, just based on the swag alone. They got mega camp collars, though.

Okay, here we go. The collars that go camping. Here we go. I would say Buscemi, he was handing out candy like it is. Like, cool, bronc, wherever he lives. One of those cool burros. You know, they're called burros up there, right? Is he a New Yorker?

I think. You think he lives close to Christopher Walken? Probably walking distance. Is he also a New Yorker? Dude, he's the king of New York. Probably walking distance. He's also a New Yorker. Dude, he's the king of New York.

See, Kim and what's-his-face had dinner on Staten Island last night. Did they? Secret dinner. Wasn't that secret if we already know about it. How do you know about it? I got sources. Damn. It was on TMZ we were both looking at.

No, dude. Yeah, my source is TMZ. Your source is Harvey. Is he still on there? I think so. No. Yeah. I think so. Who's Harvey?

The dude who runs the shit there. The TMZ guy. I'm a lawyer. He holds a coffee mug and stands against the cubes. He hosts the show. I will never watch a show put on by TMZ. Well, it's been a staple in like five, what time slots? Like right before Judge Judy or something?

Yeah. I lived at home with my parents for a time, so I know all about this genre of television. I heard Judge Judy's a real bitch. She's a multimillionaire. Yeah, she's stacking big boys. Many times over. I've heard rumors of how she treats her employees, and it ain't pretty. Really?

Yeah. That's too bad. I've seen how she treats her litigants. No respect. No. You don't go in there unprepared. And definitely don't speak until spoken to. Right.

If you try to pull the wool over her eyes, uh-uh. That old bag of bones. She's not a bag of bones. She's a bag of bones. She's not a bag of bones. She's a bag of bones. She's very old. She's a bag. I don't know how old, but I bet she's at least 68 years old. I bet she's a dope-ass grandma.

I bet she's a real good grandma. I bet you she gives out pajamas for Christmas. Dude. Christmas at Grandma Judy's house is probably so sick. I don't know, man. She might be stingy. That. I don't know, man. She might be stingy. That's what I'm saying, dog.

We're just burning right here? Is that what's going on? Yeah, we're out here blazing. Okay. BellaBox.com slash circling dash back. We still got candles for sale. It's about to be Christmas shopping season

and people are going to be like, oh, fuck. Why didn't I get this candle when I had the chance? They're right. It's going to sell out. It probably will. It will sell out before the holiday gift-giving season actually arrives.

You could also gift someone, like, a solo stove or something. Dude. We'll get there in a sec. We'll get there in a sec. First of all, let's talk about Patreon real quick. Right after this episode today, we're going to jump right into circling Bachelorette. Dave, your boy Jamie took some L's last night. First of all, let's talk about Patreon real quick. Right after this episode today, we're going to jump right into circling Bachelorette. Dave, your boy Jamie took some L's last night.

Why do you love Jamie so much? I did not know I did. Apparently, he's a villain like we've never seen, except for the many, many times there's been someone who's done just what he did. Oh my holy shit. Holy shit. Woo-hoo. That was loud. That was close.

I felt that. And obviously my dog did too. Hey, Randy. That poor guy. Randy, I'm sorry, buddy. Unbelievable thunder. That was legit. People are hooping and hollering in the hallways.

Yeah, you can hear the entire office complex loving this. Good grief. Man. Oh, man. It's like this exact unit was struck. Can you imagine if that would have happened during spooky season when Dave was telling a scary story, which you can also find on Patreon.com? That was real-life cum thunder.

That was low-key cum thunder right there. Randy, you need to cut a clip of us hearing that thunder because I am absolutely rattled right now. It's just thunder. That was loco. Waiting on the thunder rattled right now. It's just thunder. That was loco. Waiting on the thunder. Uh-huh. That's good. That's good.

That's good. Thunderstruck is another song we could do right now. Mm-hmm. It was cold in the middle of. Oh, my gosh. I was shaking at the. All right. I'm sorry.

All right. I'm trying to recover still. Damn, that was. I was a little low energy going into it, and then that got me... Oh, my... Alyssa just texted me. She's right down the street. Oh, she was like, damn.

You hear that big boy thunder? I guarantee this is a... Did Randy just jump out of his skin? He did. I'll say we all did. That's cute. Yeah, that was aggressive. Aw, look at Randy sitting next to Dad over there.

Come here, pup. Come here, my dude. Either way, patreon.com slash circlingbackpodcast. Circling Bachelorette right after this. Friday voicemails dropping on Thursday. Early access to product drops. Everything you need. Patreon.com slash circlingbackpodcast.

Also, go rate and review. Probably read your review on Monday's episode. Let's talk about our friends over at Solo Stove, though. It is Solo Stove season. It is Solo Stove season. As a front just came through, so yeah. Yeah. If there's ever a time to rip the Solo Stove in Austin, Texas, it's right now.

A little north wind. Got it. Bringing in that cool stuff. Man, I could just imagine myself starting a little Solo Stove fire with very little smoke. Dude, it's those gentle breezes, baby. That's symphonies of animals and insects. The warming glow of a campfire, day or night. A smokeless fire pit from solo stove turns a magical fall moment into an unforgettable memory.

Just think about that. It'd just be heating different this time of year when it's cold outside. You can wear your shacket, Dylan. And guess what? Unlike if you were around a campfire in your shacket, you're not going to walk away being like, oh, man, now my shacket smells like campfire. Yeah, shacket and solo stove season coincide,

and it could not be a better time of year. You know how nice it is to do a fire night and go rest your head on your pillow and wake up the next morning and your entire bed isn't ruined with campfire smoke? Dude, it's the best. It's the best feeling in the world. Oh, my gosh.

It's a game changer. You still get the warmth of those fireside blazes without having to worry about just reeking the next day. It's just a chill sitch no matter how you draw it up. I love them. Solo Stove creates story-worthy moments without the fireside fumes. Stainless steel construction designed to regulate airflow and burn more efficiently. So little smoke, you'll wonder how there's so much fire. It's easy to keep lit and even easier to keep clean.

Their fire pits are portable and built to last. It's easy to light with a few bits of starter. Your fire is blazing in minutes. They're so confident you'll love it. They offer a lifetime warranty and a 30-day free return policy. Yeah, I just said both of those things. Both of those are very nice and attractive offers. It's a warranty that and a 30-day free return policy. Yeah, I just said both of those things. Both of those are very nice and attractive offers. It's a warranty that lasts a lifetime.

Some people wait a lifetime for a warranty like this. Really? Yeah, and guess what? They got it here. They found it, yeah. No one needs a reason to gather around the fire, but Solo Stove just took away any reason not to. And now you can get $10 off and use promo code STEAM at checkout.

Just go to solostove.com. And remember, you get $10 off when you use promo code STEAM. We had a moment on Monday night. We complain a lot about Twitter being dead and clamoring for the days of something cool on Twitter that everybody's in on that's worthy. We had that. Was it Monday night? Yeah. Yeah, it was Monday night.

During the Manning cast. Yep. I had just gotten done driving from Houston to Austin, been traveling all day. All I wanted to do was just go lie down in bed, shut my eyes, and do nothing. And then I got a text. Pole Assassin's Monkey bit some kid yeah when the pole assassin's monkey bites a it's a child on halloween night it's it's must uh monitor the tl

situation i was addicted to it yeah i couldn't i couldn't take myself away sally was like unpacking like doing stuff productive around the around the place and i was just giggling in bed reading reading takes on pole Assassin's Monkey. So for those who don't know what happened, let's explain what happened. Yeah, tell us about this. You're the Texas guy. So University of Texas special teams coach, football, talking here. Jeff Banks is his name.

I thought it was Jeff Bank. It's Jeff Banks. Yeah, be careful with the apostrophe. Jay Bank. With the apostrophe there. Yeah, so his girlfriend is a stripper slash former stripper. Sure. And she has a monkey that's part of her stripper routine.

Do we ever get the monkey's name? Geo, I believe. Love it. We found her. Shout out Pete Hart, Ice House. Found his or her, the monkey's, Instagram. Good. Love it. We found her. Shout out Pete Hart, Ice House. Found his or her, the monkey's Instagram. Good. Very cool.

It's a good name for a monkey, if I'm being honest. But the stripper, she has a nickname, and it is Pole Assassin. You know why, right? I don't know how she got the nickname. I actually do. She assassinates poles. Like voting pole? What do you mean?

I don't know. P-O-L-E-S. Oh. I'm sure there's a lot of people in Virginia right now. I'm sorry. I'm not going to talk. Yes. Yeah, so the pole assistant has a monkey that is part of her strip routine.

And the monkey lives with her at home. Formerly, she made an appearance on Jerry Springer a while back. Yes. That's when you go from being an absolute grind girl to knowing that you're in the upper echelon of strippers. When you're on Springer, your career is made from there. That's true. You can't take the Springer appearance away.

She's dedicated to the craft. I have seen her work on the YouTube. No, I don't think so. I've never seen it. I would remember if I saw an act with a monkey. That's something that doesn't leave you. Sally was like, why have a monkey as a part of your act?

And I'm like, because I am emptying my wallet. It's like I'm buying a Dan Flash shirt at the strip club. I'm just trying to dump my wallet out onto the fucking stage if there's a monkey out there doing something cool. Wow. Yeah, anyway, on Halloween night,

some kids were trick-or-treating, and they walked up to the front door of the Banks residence, and apparently a door opened, and the monkey bit a child. No, no, no, no. Sorry. No. There's some facts here.

There's some facts. Let's outline. Tell me about them. So, Danielle Banks is the pole assassin's name. So, they are married. They're married. That's what she's got. Yeah.

She goes by that. She has a post on, like, Nextdoor. Hey, neighbors. I have built a haunted house slash maze at my house. I'm welcoming all kids 7 to 9.30 p.m. Adults are welcome, too, to come by there and party. Swing by. Swing by. Interesting. interesting just saying no pineapple emoji anyway um so there was this maze now this the monkey enclosure

because she posted a video later deleted it and as well as her tweeter was outside in the backyard so it wasn't like a trick-or-treat monkey just answers the door and just fucking goes at, you know, some little Power Ranger or whatever the fuck he was. Some little fucker. I'm loving the idea of a spider monkey just sprinting at a Power Ranger and just, like, biting his face.

No one's doing Power Rangers anymore. VR Troopers, okay. So, no, apparently it's gated, like, the kid went out of his way Went through the gate Went back, found the monkey enclosure Which is fenced off with a sign That says stay out

Emotional support animals I don't know if it says monkeys Caution, she had her warning signs Whatever Stuck his hand through and the monkey got its hand Allegedly When I first saw this I wasn't hoping and stuck his hand through, and the monkey got its hand, allegedly. Okay, I see. Yeah, yeah, yeah. When I first saw this, I wasn't hoping,

but I was imagining the scenario you just described, where the door opens, and she's like, oh, you guys are so cute, and she's got the monkey on her shoulder, as they often do. Yeah, it's a little kid dressed as Chase from Paw Patrol, and the monkey just jumps out at it. Just fucks his dope up. Right. I don't know if the video is still on the internet.

I don't know if you can find it anywhere. I'm sure it's got to be somewhere. But I'm not going to lie. It did a lot to get me more on her side than I originally was. Originally, I was like, okay, let's not. Tell us about the video. I haven't seen it. It was just her taking us through the backyard and showing every step that this kid would have had to go through in order to go find the monkey in the cage.

Okay. backyard and showing every step that this kid would have had to go through in order to go find the monkey in the cage okay and and there were a lot of critics out there when she showed the sign that said stay out emotional support monkeys or whatever it said uh there were a lot of people that said uh that marker's looking a little fresh like i'm not really sure if this sign was up a couple days ago she did it with a highlighter let Let me say this. In terms of premises liability in the state of Texas, let's talk a little bit about the attractive nuisance doctrine. It's not something that I've recently looked into, but in Texas, in simple terms, there you go, bonk,

it states that a property owner can be held liable for a child's injuries when those injuries were caused by an object or hazard likely to attract children. So even though this kid was trespassing where he shouldn't have been, they might have a cause of action in civil court. Likely to attract children. Sure. Think of, this may be a bad example, but think of like a pool. Oh, okay. Or like a trampoline.

I don't know. Or like a trampoline. I don't know. Or like an old car that anything that, and then they get hurt and then it's like, okay. Then it's your fault? Correct. Now, criminal, as far as, I think she, you don't have to have a license for a monkey in Texas for certain kinds. So I think she's good there. And she was very clear in the video that she's well-versed in monkey law, which is very cool. She's like, I know all the laws in Texas about monkeys.

She's not monkeying around. Man, the pull assassin is no one-trick pony. No. But this dude, let's get back to Coach here, because I expressed feeling a little bit bad for him because I didn't know his full story, but whatever. He was apparently at A&M. Do you know the A&M tie-in?

No. He was a special teams coach there at some point. By the way, million-dollar salary. He's the highest-paid special teams coach in college football. Is he really? Yeah. The house looked nice. It looked like a great house to raise a family in.

Where's the crib? Not sure. It looked like a great house to raise a family in. Where's the crib? Not sure. Highest paid special teams coach and gave the green light for the fake punt with Dicker. Really? With Baylor. Okay.

Assuming. That's a discretionary call for the punter. If he feels like he can make it, then they have the green light to take off. They didn't call that play. Okay, good. feels like he can make it, then they have the green light to take off. They didn't call that play. Okay, good.

Should we find where they live and form a support group out there for Gio? Maybe. I don't want this to be a Harambe situation. Okay, so you're saying that, yeah. No, I don't either. The monkey was just being a monkey. Yeah. So you can find it on the internet. Let's be clear. This ain't your grandma's monkey. Is this a monkey. Yeah. So you can find it on the... Let's be clear.

This ain't your grandma's monkey. Tax approval website. Is this a gated neighborhood? Hard to say. So Jeff Banks... They've been calling my neighborhood a goated neighborhood lately. Really? Is that right?

Yeah. I know our friends in College Station will correct me, but there was a time recently, within the last decade at least, where Banks and another coach held like a symposium for female Texas A&M football fans and said symposium had a PowerPoint presentation and it was basically to explain the game of football to female football fans, which inherently is highly condescending. However, it gets worse as the entire thing was done with innuendo.

Sexual innuendo. Oh, good. Yeah, that's what you want to do. Not only do you want to mansplain, but you want to harass at the same time. You love to see that. Okay, I think I found his house. I'm not going to tell people where it is but i think

i found it is it a nice neighborhood um can i walk there no damn yep he got he got suspended she did invite people over to her house she wanted to have a little party this was in 2016 this is under someone and he had to suspend him uh it was it was jeff banks and jim turner the o-line coach after slides of a sexist and irresponsible women's clinic presentation went viral i don't remember this it's 2016 i feel like we this had to we had to have noticed this this uh back in the day but so yeah orange bloods was all over this, not shocked. There was also a rumor going around they had a haunted house where the kid was attacked by a monkey. But luckily, PFT Commenter got some clarification around that, and she said no.

No one was viciously attacked. This was a lie, a whole lie. She was not a part of any haunted house. The kid did not have permission to be on the other side of my property. Okay. Do you think they could hear the be on the other side of my property. Okay. Maybe your nuisance shouldn't be so attractive. Her what? Her nuisance.

It's true. The thing was caged, though, right? I mean... Yeah. Okay. Despite of its rage. Right, right. She's off the hook here.

What? If I'm the judge, I'm throwing this out. Do you think they smashed any pumpkins? It was Halloween night. What are you doing? Don't throw your pumpkins away. Why? Bad for the environment, dog.

What do you do with them? Compost, right? Yeah, you can compost them, but you can also feed them to animals. You just made a face. Do you not compost? Do you? Don't win compost. Very few people compost oh i get it you what post okay okay wow dude dylan five percent of we're trying to save the environment you're

just making cum jokes five percent of households compost tell me i'm wrong you know you know my thoughts you take your food and you dispose of it i can't imagine not being a part of the Clean Play Club at this point. I have nothing to compost. I'm eating everything. Even the bones. I eat my banana peel, my bones, everything. Everybody's eating. Yep.

So this dude, Jeff Banks was like, I don't know if he was on the short list, but his name was getting floated for some head coaching jobs. How are these straight bullets going to affect that you know he probably was you know when he saw his phone light up he's like oh oh the monk oh yeah you know i guess i guess all those years of having a pet monkey finally caught up to me do you like if one of us had a pet monkey and this happened to one of us like we would immediately send a text being like fuck geo just bit somebody yeah like this is this could be this could be bad what happens to the monkey if they if they do

anything with this monkey i'm i'm starting a new i'm starting in harabe part two a dog bites a kid and it's big time trouble well unfortunately prop a didn't pass so yeah so no one's going to do anything about it. Let's not. Let's not. What? This poor fucking monkey. Do any of these fuckers. Do any of these fuckers. Take like. Like. Like cum shot.

I'm sorry. I just. I watched it again last night. Can we. Can we. That was a haunted house, technically. So there is a tie-in to this segment. That's true. That's fair.

Yeah, I want justice for this monkey. I hate to say that her video convinced me that she was not in the wrong at all. It seemed as though she put her monkey in a place that would not get touched by outsiders. And this little kid just ran in. This little fucker. This little fucker ran in. I need to know what the kid was wearing.

Yeah, dude, I know. I hate to say that, but I have to know what costume this was. I thought the kid was dressed as a giant banana. Yeah, I was going to say, what if he was...

Monkeys love bananas. He got confused. He hit him with the Hey Arnold costume and it was a banana. Did I tell you I had a kid, two kids? They were probably

the oldest ones we got. They might have been 14. One was bacon and eggs. Uh-huh, and the other was a slice of pizza. And I was like, man, this is good. I know this didn't take much effort because you just bought the costume, but I'm happy that we got a little pizza and breakfast. Bay and breakfast. Breakfast and bay.

Breakfast and bay. It's cute. It is cute. Let's talk about bird dogs. She should have gotten a bird dog. Are we done with this story? No, I feel like we should be. We haven't heard the end of it.

Yeah, we'll keep everyone updated. Did you all have a lot of people texting you about this? No, zero, actually. I was like ground zero for people that aren't from Texas just texting me being like, hey, please send any updates you get on this. I think they just knew that, you know. Oh, like we have the inside scoop because we live here? I think they assumed because, like, you know,

Sally's family is so gung-ho UT that I was going to be getting, like, immediate updates. I did have multiple friends and group texts who were UT fans be like, oh, yeah, like, yeah, you didn't know about this guy? Like, yeah, he, you know, he has a story where, like, he – because he apparently, like, he had a – he left his family for this – for the pole assassin. And, like, he was on Saban's staff at Alabama. Like, and they're like, oh, yeah, this is a thing.

Like, we talked – this was, like, a big message board thing. We knew he had a monkey. This is – this screams, like, Austin Hardo. Yeah, they were, like, making me feel like an idiot for not knowing about this. I'm we had a monkey. This screams like Austin Hardo. Yeah, they were like, you're an idiot for not knowing about this. I'm trying to think of an Austin Hardo take that's like, yeah, no, like Mattel Rancho, their food sucks, but it's all about the atmosphere.

That's my take. No, but that's kind of like, I mean, if you're only eating at Mattel Rancho once when you're in town, you're probably going to think the food's really good. The food doesn't suck. I'm sorry. It does not suck.

But you know what I mean? It's like, yeah, no, we knew about Paul Sasson's monkey like months ago. That's what they did. I didn't know anything about this guy. Texas hipsters. I'm a Texas football fan. Yeah, no, look into Jeff Banks, man. Look into stuff at him. Yeah, dude. He left his wife and married this stripper.

I'm surprised you didn't know about this already. Paul Sasson, though, is having quite the glow up, so. Yeah, I mean, dude, does she have an Instagram or anything? Like, I feel like she should be stacking followers right now. I think she deleted it. Or it was private. I immediately tried to find her IG.

Did she go by the pole assassin on Instagram? Did she still go by that moniker? I think she's clean. I don't think so. Did she clean her image up a little bit? Yeah, probably. Is she no longer assassinating poles? Yeah think she's clean i don't think her image up a little bit yeah probably she no longer assassinating polls yeah she's private come on lame what did poland ever do to anybody whoa okay don't click on the ads in her uh bio

what do you do what's her at poll assassin underscore duh i guess i guess theAssassin was just taken. I'm just picturing a guy with a case, and he just goes to the top of a building and just pops it open, and he puts the gun together, and he just peers down the scope and just shoots a pole. I see that she is followed by a member of WASH Media that will go unnamed at the moment. Okay.

I'm not sure who it is. Is it me? I don't follow her. Not you. Cool. What if the little kid was feeding her monkey like a Laffy Taffy banana flavor? Charleston Chew. No one's wasting Charleston Chew like that, David.

With a little banana runt that's sick those are the worst runs i know but they look cool they do look cool i i do enjoy that runs makes their stuff look like the actual stuff i think that's a that's a nice touch it's like tricks it's a nice touch remember tricks yeah they're for kids like that didn't they make their stuff look like the like oh i oh, I'm eating fruit. I'm not eating 17 grams of sugar. I'm actually eating a banana. Do Trix do that?

Yeah. I was never a Trix kid. Yeah, that bunny put out sketch vibes. I didn't like Trix. Big time Cheerios kid. Sometimes I will fuck with Fruity Pebs. Trix are trash. Love Fruity Pebs. You have to.

You have to. Do you mess with the chocolate Fruity Pebbles? What are they called? Nah. Cocoa Pebbles. Cocoa something? Nah, son. I didn't like chocolate-favored cereals.

I liked the Reese's Puffs, though. I was so out on Lucky Charms because the marshmallow, like the texture of them, would just completely ruin my experience. That's an old man take. I fucking loved them. Yeah, I'm sorry you experienced that. Thank you. It was tough. I used to do a thing at Grand X where I would take my cereal milk from my

Honey Nut Cheerios that I'd eat at my desk, and I would dump it in my coffee. Okay. I'm a savage. I don't hate that. Dude, honestly, it was really good. We should draft children's cereals at one point. We should. Dude, the best part is the milk at the end.

Oh, yeah. I love drinking the cereal milk when I'm done. Some company did a Shark Tank, and they pitched doing cereal-flavored milk. And the first question they asked were like, well, how much sugar is in this? And they were like, oh. Shiley said like, oh, like 42 grams of a container. Yeah, we're out. And every single person was like, nope.

That's terrible. Not doing it. That's directly contributing to childhood. Yeah. Yeah, we're out. And every single person was like, nope. That's terrible. Not doing it. That's directly contributing to childhood. Yeah. Yeah. That's awful. Not the move. But I'll eat any cereal out there right now.

You laugh about that, but I actually did invest in that company. Yeah? How'd it go for you? I lost quite a bit. I'm sorry. I did not secure my financial future with that company. Dude, my biggest gripe about the hotel buffet that we stayed at had no cereal. No mini boxes of cereal to be found. That's like the only time I eat cereal is on vacation. I know. Okay. While I do enjoy that, they're so small, you need like six of them

to have a full bowl of cereal. No, you pregame your chilaquiles with a little, you know, honey nut Cheerios. It's just like a little taste though. That's all you need. It's a starter. Get your beak wet. It's an aperitif, dude. Just dip your toe in. I can't imagine not starting my hotel brunch without a tiny bowl of cereal. A perfectly tiny bowl of cereal.

All right. Fine. You convinced me. I'm in. Fuck. Are we done? I can circle back as many times as we need to

on this one. No, no, no. I think we're done. We will continue to monitor. Okay. Bird dogs. You guys familiar with that? Bird dogs doesn't just do shorts, but they do pants and joggers as well.

Oh, yeah. Well, I think I do know that. And they all have built-in underwear to make them the most comfortable shorts, pants, or joggers ever. You aware of this? They really are wildly comfortable. Will, it's like angel wings beating on your balls. That's facts. Is it really? They're are wildly comfortable. Will, it's like angel wings beating on your balls. That's facts. Is it really?

They're perfect for doing literally anything. Beach, brunch, golf pool, working out. They sold Lululemon's designer. We're officially straight up pants season now. I can finally wear the bird dog's pants and not be worried that I'm sweating. Not that it matters because they're moisture wicking. It doesn't matter. They're my everything pants. I'll say it. You're afraid to say worried that I'm sweating. Not that it matters because they're moisture-wicking. It doesn't matter. They're my

everything pants. I'll say it. You're afraid to say it. I'm not. I hope the designer they stole from Lululemon is well taken care of. Sure he is. I think his person's compensated. He's handcuffed to his desk at their headquarters designing dope-ass shit all the time. Crying on his keyboard.

Lululemon, get out of here. You want your tricks? Design something. They, like, bring him in. They're like, hey, Steve, what do you got for us today? I don't know, man. Fucking joggers. Yeah.

All right. Yeah. I got the Jeff Pesos right here. They're khaki. The Bruce Wayans. The Bruce Wayans, the Steven Jobs. Dude, they got the Ernie Musks. Real talk?

Yeah. I actually wear the Kevin buffets a lot. Those are my go-tos. To be crystal clear, yes, I did pack them on vacation. Yes, I did wear them to two dinners. Just putting it out there. And I look sharp. Wow.

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and boom, a free Bird Dogs whistle tip football with your pair of Bird Dogs. You will not take these things off. I promise you. Some shit went down in Dallas yesterday. Ooh, let me guess. Yeah, tough L. The Heat came in town. The Heat have a great roster.

Top to bottom. Very good. Deep. And Mavs playing without KP. Dave, this is not about basketball. No Maxi Kleber. Dave's in dip mode. The other thing about it, you did go to Dallas yesterday for a little bit.

Yeah, you took off right before lunch and went to Dallas. You got back super early this morning. I don't think that's right. You said there was going to be a big reveal at the Rolling Stones concert. I didn't know you even cared about them, and you were like, no, I have to go to this concert. No, they're my favorite band.

Really? Yeah, you didn't know that about me? I didn't know that. I got the lip tattoo on my back. Yeah, what's your favorite Rolling Stones song? Ooh, man. Jumpin' Jack Flash. Dude, I'm a sympathy for the devil guy.

Can we talk about the story? What's your favorite Rolling Stones song, old man? I don't know. Probably Start Me Up. Start me up. No, mine's the one that Micah does at karaoke, Mixed Emotions. It's a weird one to do at karaoke, but I'm fine with it. When I was a kid, my friend thought that the lyrics to

Beast of Burden were Big Suburban. And he thought that for years and years and years. I want to be your Big Suburban. Like, what are you doing? You want to take the family from place to place? Like, I'm pretty sure Suburban didn't exist when he wrote that song. I thought Bad Moons

on the Rise said Bathrooms on the Right. Really? Yeah. Sang it one time. My mom's like, that is not what the lyrics are. Sorry, Will. Another confusing one. Jimi Hendrix,

excuse me while I kiss this guy. It's the sky. It's actually the sky. Yeah, there are a bunch of them. A bunch of fun ones. Yeah. Dave, can you explain what happened? Why do I have to explain it?

Because you're the guy. You said you're like, I'm well-versed enough to explain. You literally said you're well-versed. I said I am well-versed, but I didn't really know everything about QAnon. You're the Q guy. You love barbecue. When your life has been touched by Q in a way that people you know have gotten really into Q, then you really, there's different ways you can handle that situation.

You can just dismiss this person. You can try to help this person. And let me tell you, there's really not a good, there's no good way. So essentially, yeah, I do know a little bit about Q. You got paywalled. Dude, the Dallas Morning News is just swatting me out of the gym right now. Like, I'm doing anything to click this article. Is this your one free read of the day?

Oh, my word. So essentially, in Dealey Plaza, you guys familiar with Dealey Plaza? You know what happened there, right? Yes, JFK, I believe, was assassinated right there. By Lee Harvey Oswald. Allegedly. You know, and people will tell you by himself. He acted alone is what people will tell you.

I've never done the tour. It is quite interesting. You're a Dallas guy. I've done a tour in the sense that every Uber driver I've ever had take me through that explains to me that that's where it happened. I did the full tour and it was very, very interesting. My tour. They took you to the book depository.

That's where you deposit books. You deposit books there. You walk up to the window where, allegedly, Lee Harvey was posted up with this rifle, and they show you, like, okay, this is where it happened. You turn around this corner, and then, boom. Sure. So that's where it went down. We explained that very well.

boom sure so that's where it went down we explained that very well and uh apparently so jfk juniors had a big role in in some of the some factions of the q movement um mainly that he is not dead do you remember he died tragically in a in a plane crash in 1999 fun fact he's been dead for over 20 years well Well, think again, loser. He's alive, maybe, now. He was supposed to come back yesterday in Dallas at Dealey Plaza. Of course, some were saying he was going to come back with JFK, his dad. And he was going to announce something. He was going to announce that the previous, the orange man, he was going to announce he was running me.

He was going to announce that Trump, I believe, going to announce that trump i believe i might have this wrong probably have it wrong this makes my brain short circuit that trump was actually he's going to reinstall trump as president because the election was was rigged and then trump was going to resign and install jfk jr as president i believe and this attracted like 150 200 people and of course like it gets all the news play and it and it does a good job of like making these people look insane i wonder how many people were actually believers of this and how many people were just like they work in the area like all right i gotta go fucking see this i gotta go down here and see what's going on like because if that was happening within walking distance of this office and it was like a good weather day

i'm well i'm definitely to go check that out. I want to see what's going down. Some of these people have fully bought into this conspiracy. A hundred percent. And I've met a couple of them. Yes. And know a couple of them. Here's my question.

Excuse me. Surely there are some folks that are like into Q who still have like, you know, their head on straight, right. They're still not like totally crazy. And you know what I'm saying? Right. They're fairly normal to some degree,

even though they got wrapped up in this conspiracy theory shit. When they see shit like this happen, where a guy who's been dead for over 20 years is supposed to reveal himself in some grand fashion to make this like announcement how are they not like okay we got to take a step back these people are fucking insane and i don't want to be associated with them and how does q like keep getting all these people involved when there's shit like this happens this shit like this it gets it gets its hooks into certain people who are susceptible to it. And you got to remember, man, like the last two years, let me step on my soapbox.

The last couple of years have been insane. Like we've never seen this pandemic. People working from home and people lost their job. Just a lot. There's been a lot going on. So people isolated. So I think people, it makes some people more susceptible

to stuff like this because, I mean, dude, it's been a hard couple years for a lot of people. But I think just the pandemic alone, I think, created a lot of time for people to get more invested in social causes

that they otherwise didn't care about. Whether it's anything, it could be anything from, you know, something like QAnon, which, you know, we obviously don't believe in, to racial injustice. Like, I think there's more of a spotlight on that kind of stuff. And I think some, QAnon is just such a slippery slope for some of these people. Yeah.

And like, it's like a coping mechanism. And like, I could see how it could, some conspiracies, like, there are some people who think that's fun. It's fun to, like, think that that's the way the world is. Well, I think it's fun to do. There is, like, a secret – there is a guy named – a guy or gal named Q that goes by Q that, like, has all this inside info, that knows what's really going on behind the scenes. Q-level clearance within the government, which is apparently a pretty high clearance. Yeah, it's...

Anyway, it's just... I just confirmed that Barbecue Anon is not an Instagram app that can be acquired at this time. I'm also able to confirm that JFK Jr. did not show up yesterday. No, but I thought he might come back at the Rolling Stones concert at the Cotton Bowl, and I know some people who went, and he did not he didn't show up why not no i thought mick was

gonna bring him out on stage have him do a couple songs but no this shit is just so wacko man this is a bit someone did a bit and there's people out there that are susceptible and they convinced them and like there's people laughing the people who are all right, let's do this thing in Dealey Plaza. We've got the anniversary of JFK coming up next month. And all this does is go to, I mean, it makes people look like idiots. It's embarrassing for the city of Dallas, even though it was a couple hundred people.

But all it really does, it makes people who really believe that JFK, not JFK Jr., JFK, that there was a plot, depending on what faction you're in. Like, we don't know who did it. But it makes them, it delegitimizes them. So it actually hurts people who think that that's something that should be looked into. Man.

I'm going to step off this box. It would have been super lit if JFK Jr. did emerge at the Rolling Stones concert, though. That would be a lituation. What would be the best way to reemerge? Would it be like parachute in? Or maybe he descends from kind of like, I'm thinking David Blaine situation here. Oh, like at your bachelor party in Breck? Exactly like that.

When Dua Lipa's levitating comes on? Yes. What if Chris Angel's final mind freak is revealing that he is JFK Jr.? I think heads would... Would your mind not be freaked? My mind would be permanently stuck in freak mode. Is there any celebrity that's dead right now

that could have gotten you out of your seat to go see if they were going to reemerge? Pretty much anyone that was going to come back from the dead, I would have gone to the Stone Show for that. I just don't see anyone doing that. Can you imagine how lit it would have been if Michael Jackson would have emerged out of his coffin at his funeral and done Thriller? He's just moonwalking. Yeah, but then he's got all this other stuff, all the baggage. Yeah, yeah.

And he's got an answer for all the documentaries and all this stuff. You're like, eh, you just stay passed away. You don't want this smoke, man. Stay dead, man. It's not good out here. What would you have done if you would have been, like, watching the local news coverage on this, just kind of sitting back on your couch, and you look over and you see Luka,

and he's holding the flag? That's – Yeah, what would you do? How does that affect your fanhood if you see one of your favorite athletes just trying to see if JFK Jr. is going to return? What if your favorite athlete didn't lie about being vaccinated and then got COVID mid--season and when he was having like a great great year following an mvp year did he lie about being vaccinated he told people he

was immunized but which is like gray area on what he's actually interesting i guess i didn't realize that i'm really paying attention to a lot of nfl this year. Along with saying he was immunized, he also said that he respects his teammates' rights and decisions not to get vaccinated if they were to choose that. I don't think he outright lied, but people are being like he was walking around the sidelines during the preseason without a mask,

which you're not supposed to do, I guess, if you're not vaccinated. I don't know. I don't know how we got here. I got us here, and I'm sorry. Dylan, are you worried about your pinkies falling off? Yes Y'all see this shit? So there's a tweet that What?

A study's been done that like The way people hold their phones with one hand Yeah pick up your phone Dave and act like you're scrolling One hand No one hand dude Do you anchor it or like It's not a cheeseburger you can use one hand. Yeah, pick up your phone, Dave, and act like you're scrolling. One hand. No, one hand, dude. Do you anchor it or use your pinky as a base to hold it up? He was just using that pinky as a base.

I use it as a base. I'm all about that base. No troubles. What am I doing wrong? It's causing strain in the ligaments of your pinky, and over time, it can lead to real damage in your pinky. But what if you're built

different? That's my golf game problem. What? What if you're built different? If you're built different, I don't know. Like what if we're built for content

and like our pinkies are strong as hell? Someone tweeted a link to this study that's been done and then it was quote tweeted by someone who made a funny joke and went viral

but it landed on my TL and it's just so stuck in my head. Like every time I'm picking my phone, I think about it now and I'm trying to like do two hands or like use man hey i don't i'm gonna have finger i got some news for it you're probably okay yeah pinkies i know but i just know during the peak of during the peak of lockdown i was just like i there were numerous days where i was like why does my hand hurt so bad and it was all stemming from the bottom of my hand at the pinky

area and i know it was because I was on my phone like eight hours a day or I was playing FIFA against random kids. Getting smoked. Well, it's hard to say. You'd have to look at

the record books for that. I also throw those out when I play. Okay. Okay. Are you guys concerned about this? No.

Well, all our lives we were told to worry about carpal tunnel. Yes. Y'all have criticized how I do a thing with my phone when I'm sitting here that I have it more upright, so it looks like I might be recording y'all. Which is a good way to hold your phone. I know, but I get how someone could be like, oh, are you taking a picture of me?

When I'm not, I'm actually just scrolling my phone. There are theories out there that humans will evolve to accommodate certain technological advances. And phones being one of those technologies that just change... I don't know, man. Yeah, but how do you feel about those phone cases that have the little ring on the back that you can put your fingers in and hold your phone easier? Do I need to cop one of those? I'd rather have four fingers than have one of those on the back of my phone.

I feel like they're for girls. It's like for selfies. Not the guys. You can really hang it out there. I take hella selfies, dog. That's true. I don't. You know, I haven't seen a selfie stick in a minute.

I'm not a selfie king. That's because they made it so when you do a selfie on your camera, you can zoom out a little bit more. Maybe that's the answer. Maybe I need to get one of those little things to hold on the back. No, dude. Because then you're at a group dinner and your phone's sitting there and the ring's right there and everyone's like, why's Dylan got that ring on his phone?

Dylan, when it comes to that- He's worried about his pinky. He's worried. Dylan, if I was you, why is your pinky nail so long? Stop. I would be more worried about your hairy palms than your pinky. Okay. That's a masturbation joke from way back in the day.

They have gotten hair here. I'm wondering. They're hairless. Oh, you shaved them. I have great hands. You must have shaved them when you shaved the rest of your beard and left a mustache. I don't shave my palms, Will. Old mustache palms over there?

That'd be weird. That would be bad if you had a hairy palm. Why doesn't hair grow there? It's kind of weird. Because there's a lot of friction. I don't think there's follicles. Hands are weird, man. You use your hands a lot, Dylan.

Even if there was hair, it'd get rubbed off all the time. Fingerprints are weird. Like the texture of the skin is just so good. I feel like your fingerprints should change over time. Weird. Like it's weird that we can identify everyone by their fingerprints. Like your skin regenerates so quickly. Doesn't it seem like they just change at some point?

Who thought of fingerprints? It's weird, right? Fingerprints are weird. I'm not high, I promise. What's so weird about them? That they're all so unique. And we just have these random patterns that grow on our fingers that identify us. That's freaking weird.

You ever gotten your palm read, Dave? How's that lifeline line? I've had some red palms before, let me tell you. I was smacking Dylan around. He was smacking my ass. I was smacking his tight little ass. He was. He does it in the locker room all the time.

People look at us and they try to get us to stop. He can't stop. But no, I have not had my palm read. I know in one of these, like the Lifeline. Yeah, Dylan seemed to know way too much about this. How do you know so much about getting your palm read? Which one's my Lifeline? I've never had my palms read, for the record.

My palms look the same, just opposite. If you're watching at home, if you're not watching on video, I should say, you should watch the video as we're all just looking at our hands. No, if you're not watching the video, you need to watch the video just for us jumping out of our chairs when the thunder struck.

I don't think fingerprints are super interesting. I already said it's weird. Retina scans are weird. It's the way of the world, man. I prefer blockchain. I think they make your hands more grippy. That's like the intent of the evolutionary

purpose of them. I'm thinking about burning mine off right tell me do you think what makes you think i would know that you don't know shit i forgot do you know what this podcast does you don't know anything dude no one has ever learned anything from this podcast uh we get people they just learned a lot about a stripper who had a monkey that attacked a child we get people thinking dave they're thinking about their fingers right now and i and that's because of us a little bit far from me i heard more thunder out there i'm just saying dog that's why the wet bandits like oh no that's why they sticky band that's why the sticky bandits decide to do that like no fingerprints no they just we

just wanted to steal change from like the blue s it's called. UNICEF and shit? Yeah. The Red Cross? Ah, the Red Cross. That's Blue Santa. Is that a thing? Blue Santa? That sounds like a movie.

Like about six minutes long. Dude, I was going through some old photos the other day. What are you doing? I was going through some old photos the other day. What are you doing? I was going through some old photos, just trying to find some stuff. And I stumbled across a photo that I took on my old cable where I was typing in Home Alone during the Christmas season so I could go watch Home Alone. And it was all like, Home Alone, Home Alone 2, Lost in New York, Home Alone 3, Horny in Home Alone. And I was just like, oh, my God. You have to omit this during the month of December.

Kids are looking for this movie. Yeah, I was like, you can you have to omit this during the month of December. This is, kids are looking for this movie. Yeah. I was like, you can't have this on the screen. Uh, does anybody, I know Dylan doesn't, but would anybody like to go see the ghostbusters afterlife featuring Paul Rudd with me?

What do you think? I don't, I thought you were out on it or something. I don't know. Talk about, yeah, I still haven't seen bond yet, which is like,

if I'm going to go to the theaters, I need to go see bond first. I do. Ooh, let's do like a matinee than a night one. Dude, let's spend all day.

You're trying to go back to back? I've done that. I want to see Dune. Yeah. I haven't seen that yet. I'm going to watch that at home. But I saw, I actually saw,

I saw Pirates of the Caribbean back to back. Dune. Why would you do that? Dune Haas. Because I went to the first showing, Dylan, and the girl that I thought

was going to be there wasn't there. And then in the middle of the movie, she sent me a text and she was like, hey, you want to go to the 9 o'clock? And I was like, yes, I do. Did y'all suck face in the back of the theater? No, we did nothing. You ever do that? Yes.

I tried one time, but I chickened out. I couldn't make the move. My first ever French kiss was during Zoolander. and once we got done French kissing, I went to go look back at the movie and there was a little kid sitting directly in front of us just staring at us and he goes, that was sweet. Shut up.

And I was just like, okay, I mean, this is memorable. That's right, kid. And Hansel, he's so hot. That's pretty baller. Yeah, shouts to that kid. Damn, dude, you're just getting it in a theater. I know, I was in the back row. I was like, dude, chill, stop looking to that kid. Damn, dude. You're just out here just getting it in a theater. I know. I was in the back row.

I was like, dude, chill. Stop looking. Why did you turn around? Did he hear y'all, like, swapping spit? Probably heard us. Oh, God. There's nothing worse than just hearing a makeout. You're just over here trying to watch.

What were you watching? Zoolander? Zoolander, dude. You disgust me, dude. The fact that I was even skipping part of Zoolander is a bad look. Are you saying that to sound cool? Were you re-watching The Notebook? I swear to God it was Zoolander.

Why couldn't he turn left? I don't get it. That was kind of... It was just because he was a dumbass. Oh, yeah, that's right. Good point. Is it time for This Weekend of Fun? We're already there?

What? We're cruising. Dude, we're 50. I feel like we just started. We're in. Look at us. I'm still stuck on the fingerprint. I'm just getting started.

Dude, This Weekend of Fun is presented by Liquid IV, of which I'm going to be drinking several of this weekend. Stay hydrated out there. The cooler weather makes it easier to miss signs of dehydration, like overheating and perspiration, which means it's even more important to keep your body properly hydrated. And flu season, yeah, it's in full swing. Proper hydration and vitamins can help support a strong immune system. Making hydration a priority always helps us feel healthier

on a day-to-day basis and fuels us to be our highest potential. One stick of liquid IV, it's 16 ounces in 16 ounces of water. It hydrates faster and more efficiently than water alone. Your boy's been drinking hella liquid IVs lately. Really? I took an entire pack of the

tangerine flavored ones to Mexico. Every morning wake up, liquid IV, immediately felt better. It's a great way to start your day. I brought 10 of them on my trip to Mexico. How many did you return with? One for me every day, one for Bay every day. I came back with exactly zero. Wow. There are perks to dating, Dylan.

Yeah. I will hook you up with liquid IV. It's what I do. I actually have some in my car that was sent to me. I should probably bring them into the office. That's sick. I get a lot of liquid IV at my place. I get an insane amount of liquid IV. It's like they know I've got a hydration problem. Have y'all tried the guava yet? Because I haven't. Oh, it's... They stole it from me. It's tropical.

It's tropical. I've got to get my hands on it. They've got the pina colada. That is very good. Bring me two. Remember that Kygo one? That was a pina colada. So that was the same one. two. Remember that Kygo one? That was the same one. It was just they Kygo'd it. They just, okay. They gave Kygo the boot.

We can handle it. We got it from here, Kygo. Dave, didn't you say today's the 10-year anniversary of Levels? Friday or last weekend. Oh, okay. It was like, I'm on my Kygo stuff right now. I'm just out here doing it. I'm on my Liquid IV stuff right now. True. Whenever I here doing it. I'm on my Liquid IV stuff right now. True.

Whenever I drink Liquid IV, I queue up This Is Kygo Tropical House remixes. Every time? Yeah, every single time. Because it hydrates faster and more efficiently than water alone. Everyone knows that. I'm glad that you know Levels is not Kygo. I do. It's Avicii.

Rest in peace. People might not have. Come on, David. No, we're just talking electronic music, dog. I know. I just didn't want people to be like, oh, dude, what? No, there's definitely someone that has already tweeted us being like, dude, respect Avicii.

We lost the sponsor because of it. Just to be crystal clear, I respect Avicii. Of course. He's a pioneer. R.I.P. Thank you, Dylan. Grab your Liquid IV flavors nationwide at Walmart, or you can get 25% off when you go to liquidiv.com

and use promo code circling back at checkout. That's 25% off anything you order when you get better hydration today using promo code circling back at liquidiv.com Dylan what you getting into this weekend? Give us some Wilmonds. You want some?

Welcome us to Wilmonds. Shots of Derry Rigby. Hey. I'd like to talk about my weekend now. Okay. I don't really have plans, guys. Okay. Friday, I do not have parks.

I will probably step out and do something, probably a dinner. I don't know where or with who, whom. But I will be doing something. Kind of fun, probably. Maybe you guys would like to join me. I don't know. You'll have to wait and see about my weekend of fun. I do have parks Saturday and Sunday. Saturday might have like a babysitter action and go get drinks with bae.

We've been talking about it for a minute. Step out and get some drinks. South Congress, maybe. You know, SoCo. Some people call it. You're going to South Congress and you're going to drink SoCo? Maybe. Sunday, nothing. I'll be watching

the boys just catch another dub, Probs. That's what they do. We them boys. Broncos. Oh yeah, that's an easy dub. That's going to age well. No offense, Broncos fans. Undefeated against the spread this year. Cowboys. You riding that train?

Until it bucks me. Yeah. Anyway, that's it. We're kind of looking forward to it. The weather should be perfection. This is Dylan weather right here. Yeah, this is going to be a good weather weekend. We're going through hell right now.

We've got the cold rain, cold front blowing in. But once it's gone, I can't stand the rain. It's going to be good. You just said it was Dylan's weather. I can't stand the rain, though. I love it. I am going to probably lay low, man. I really don't have much on the agenda. Could maybe do dinner, maybe some drinks. Hey, not to interrupt, but have you guys tried that new Tiki restaurant yet? Tiki Tatsuya? Tiki Tatsuya. No, I actually have a reservation there this weekend that I don't think I'm going to use. When?

What day? Not sure. Hit me up. I'd like to use it. Give it to your boy. I'll be in touch. Me and Dave will go. I'll be in touch.

But yeah, we made a reservation a long time ago, and I don't think based on how my weekend is panning out that it's even feasible for me to go. Are you going to mandate, Dave, me and you? I don't. That's rude. I don't, man. Sorry. That's quite rude.

I feel like my wife is more deserving of said invite. We're good friends, man. We hang out. We have fun together. It's a Tiki Sushi place. Not sushi. Ramen, right? Oh, ramen.

Excuse me. I don't even know if it's ramen. Let's find out. Long story short. I don't even know if it's ramen. Let's find out. Long story short, I don't got much going on. So I'm trying to just rest up. We got the holidays coming up. I want to be in a really good position to just go real hard Thanksgiving onward. Thanksgiving, company party, Christmas, New Year's.

What's your favorite? Will's birthday that no one cares about because it's January 2nd. What's your favorite fall pie, David? I don't know. Should we go there right now? What's your favorite fall pie? Favorite or most fuckable? That's a good question. I was just going to go favorite to eat, psychopath.

I was going to go, you know what? I a i'll go pumpkin pie oh my god that's fucking loco what is he doing okay i do like pumpkin pie it's pretty good exactly one piece one slice please whipped cream or nah yeah dude if you're not whipped creaming your pumpkin pie you're you're messing up oh you don't know my whipped cream take, apparently. Nah. You want to... You eat just bare bones pie? I fucking hate whipped cream. Terrible take. Is it because you had a bad experience in high school after a high school football game?

Yes. When your friend's cheerleader girlfriend came over? Yeah. It got really awkward. How do you not just throw a dollop of whipped cream on your pie every single time, dog? You know, the only whip I do is the whip and sometimes the nae nae, but I don't do whipped cream. Well, just tell us about your weekend, man.

Is cheesecake a cake? I know it says cake in the literal title, but it's more of a pie. It is my favorite. When it is served, I prefer it to almost anything. Yeah. Like, in terms of cake or pie, cheesecake reigns supreme for me. I've been noticing your cake lately. Really?

I don't know. I feel like, I think I'm just, I don't even think it's muscled down there. I think it's just all chunkiness. It looks good. Brett, why do you even show up for this? I don't know. Will told me to come in a little early today. No, I said we're ready for it in a few, and he walked right in.

What does that mean? A few. Three minutes. A few is three minutes. Well, luckily for you, Brett, I don't have much cooking this weekend. On Friday night, I'm probably not doing anything with intention. So please do not try to lure me out, Dylan, as I am trying to intentionally do nothing. Did you hear that Will granted me and him an IPA day?

He said we can have one IPA day. Am I invited? Sure. It's where we go out and drink IPAs all day. And Will can't do that all day. I can. He IPA day. Am I invited? Sure. It's where we go out and drink IPAs all day. And we'll just do that all day. You can't do that all day. Absolutely. I can.

We have one day. You put that on the table. Sally needs to be there so that if I need to go home, she can immediately shuffle me out. No, okay. She needs to at least be on call. That's fine. Okay. Because you're not going to let me go home if she's not there.

Correct. I need her to rip me away from the situation. Yes. Saturday, I'm going to a wedding. That's it. Here? Sick. A little outside of Austin.

Where? Bastrop. Shouts to Christy and Molly. Nuptials. It's going to be lit. Let's freaking go. Can't wait. I might go out after that, though. Are you going to dagger like you did at Micah's wedding? I did not dagger at Micah's... Are you kidding? Did I dagger at Micah's wedding? You told us not

to release the video. God, that would have been good. I've not seen the... any video from Micah's yet. The chair. Not the chair. The lifted Micah. Oh, I can get you one. I have an extended cut. The invisible chair that we used. I have an extended cut of that if you guys want it. Yeah, hook us up, man.

Yeah, I can make it happen. Brett, do you want to talk about your weekend, or do you just want to hop right into Brett's breaking news presented by Keeps? New York City. I'll be there doing a bachelor party. Can you bring us back some salsa? Sure. What did you guys decide on the boarding?

Where are you all staying? Are you all doing separate? The people that don't live there for the bachelor party are staying at a hotel. Oh, this is the bachelor party. Yeah, four to a room. Where are you staying? In a hotel room

with three other guys. I thought you had a crash pad up there still. Oh, I do, but I want to... You're not going to stay with Portnoy? Yeah, me with the boys. With the boys. The boys. You can have Dave.

Yeah, maybe Portnoy. I don't even know where Portnoy lives at this point. He's got cribs all over. He's got Miami or some shit. Yeah, he's got a Miami house. He's got a Philly crib. Man, he's all over that dude. You should miss him worldwide.

He's a jet setter. You should hit up, I don't know. Random people who live in New York. Dude, go stay with Lil Sass. Dude, yeah. I met Lil Sass last time I was up there at the Gem Saloon. Shouts, I'll probably make an appearance there. Were you like, did you play the card?

So like, yeah, I used to kind of work here. Do you not know? Yeah, I used to sign your checks, bro. Like, I'm Brad. He's the king of New York, man. Well, yeah, and he has two accounts. He's like Micah. Dude, he's like the 20-year-old version of Micah.

Do we all need second accounts? It's pretty baller. I mean, it's hard enough to have one. Yeah, it's pretty baller, man. Yeah. How does he pick which one he tweets? I think one's like a test account because they're both big accounts. He just tests material out on one and then pops up to the big boy not trouble shit is it ab testing ab testing yeah it's that's part of

the funnel fucking unreal new engaged listeners the funnel let's go that's sick brett yeah do you have some breaking news for us presented by keeps sure will i've now i don't think i've ever given you the option you want do you want the option? No, I want you to talk about keeps first. You have a significant amount of experience using keeps. I do. I play the prevent defense. You have to at this point. Preemptive strikes, man.

Nope, just prevent defense. Well, everyone, I'm about to turn 35. I'm two months out of turning 35. Are you really? Yeah, the countdown is fucking real right now. I think I met you at 30. I don't love it. You are so old. I'm halfway to 70. I met you at 32 i think probably man probably but two out of three men

will experience hair loss by the time they're 35 which means that there's no better time than now for me to start just hammering keeps tick tock can you guys like look at my hair now like how's it looking dave uh good man i have my. I have my scalp issue going on, too. I'm just all nervous about this. Time to get some keeps in the mix. Be proactive, man. More than 50 million men in the U.S. experience male pattern baldness, and keeps offers a simple, stress-free way to keep your hair.

Convenient virtual doctor consultations and medications delivered straight to your door every three months. You don't even have to leave your home. No, you just talk with a doctor online and then he sends you the regiment. At a low cost. Or she. Just $10 a month.

They offer generic versions. Discreet packaging, so the whole squad at the apartment doesn't think that you're just losing your hair. The baddie who lives next door. She's like, what's this? She's like, oh, that's an interesting package. Bet that's not keeps.

Probably something dope instead. Yeah, she's like, is that a present for me? Maybe. I think somebody stole a package from my porch. I'm just going to say it right now. I can talk about it after. Wow. I wish you could have kept that package.

Prevention is key. Treatments can take four to six months to see results, so act fast. If you're ready to take action and prevent hair loss, go to keeps.com slash steam and receive your first month of treatment for free. That's keeps.com slash steam to get your first month free. keeps.com slash steam. Brett, break the news. I want to go back to that package real quick. Dave, you can attest.

I think I had a 12-pack of a certain energy drink stolen from my porch. That is a bad thing. Which is devastating. You know I run on carbonated caffeine drinks. energy drink stolen from my porch. That is a bad thing. You know I run on carbonated caffeine drinks. You know the one that got stolen from my porch at my old place right before we moved? Golf balls. I ordered golf balls for the round that day. They got

stolen, so not only did I have to go get more golf balls. It was just super inconvenient. At least I hope somebody went low with your Pro-V 1Xs. Aren't you a Strata guy? Actually, those were because they didn't have a lot going on the Amazon same-day delivery, so I was actually going to be playing with some... Did you get vices? No, I got some Callaway Super Softs.

I wanted no spin off the tee. I was trying to knuckle every single one of them. That's sick. Knuckle until you buckle. Isn't soft more spin? I don't know. Knock if you buckle. No, harder the ball, more spin, right?

I thought it was softer the ball, the more groove, the groove catches the polyurethane. Dude, the thing is you can't even look it up. I don't know.

Yeah, we don't know. We're blindly throwing, somebody's out there like, fucking these guys. Hashtag's just like punching air right now. Chad would know. Chad's vomiting in his car

right now listening to this. Whoa! No, you know who this is? This is the vomit. Klein's going to some town in the middle of nowhere like, these guys. I don't know the difference between hard and soft golf balls.

Yeah, that's why they're not 70. Guys like me. Guys are not long like me. He does compress the fuck out of the ball. I'll give him that. He does. Do you want to go golden penis syndrome, tacos in space, or baby seals? I like that order.

I do, too. You do, too? Okay. According to the New York Post post of which i am published golden penis syndrome is is a a thing now that means they try to interview me for this i was like no thank you i don't want to be a part of the story hear me out uh i hope you know what this is just just just 40.5 percent of college students in the United States are male, according to the National Student Clearinghouse, meaning they're in short supply and high demand on campus in terms of sexual encounters. A lack of competition has led these men to develop golden penis syndrome, which is an arrogance that stems from assumption that a steady supply of females will be sexually interested in them. Dylan?

It's interesting that Dylan was interviewed, or attempted to be. Golden Penis Syndrome has led these smug males to engage in dastardly dating practices, such as cheating and ghosting, because they're confident that another woman will always be waiting around the corner. What about breadcrumbing? That wasn't listed in the symptoms. Okay. This is interesting.

One single crumb of golden penis. Aren't the youngins not having a whole lot of sex these days? Well, they had to sit in their rooms for like a year while we dealt with them. It's more than just that, though. It's been tough on everybody. You know Demi Lovato's new album people are fucking is it called golden penis pandemic is it really no oh what are you doing why didn't you think of that because dylan was doing a thing and i don't think she's got pipes demi lovato jokes off the cuff she can sing give your heart a break give your heart a break as an all-timer.

I believe it's they can sing now. I think she... They can sing, yeah. They. Yeah, you're right. My bad. My bad. It's hard to keep up.

Way to go, Will. I didn't mean any ill by... Everyone knows that I'm a Demi Lovato stan. I just wanted... Texas is his own. Is she? She's from like Plano or some shit. No, she's from...

Isn't she a Houston suburb girl? I believe it's a Dallas suburb. Ah. They. Keep saying she's from, isn't she a Houston suburb girl? I believe it's a Dallas suburb. Ah. They. Keep saying she. I'm just saying. Albuquerque, New Mexico. Yeah, just like I said.

Sorry, boys. I mean, she could have grown up in a Houston, whatever. Control F, Texas. Man. She was brought up in Dallas, Texas. Okay. God bless Texas. It says, Lovato was brought up in Dallas, Texas. Okay. God bless Texas.

It says, Lovato was brought up in Dallas, Texas. They began playing the piano at age seven and guitar at ten when they began dancing and acting classes. You know what? That's what I like about Texas. Wow. Okay. Do some more Texas lyrics.

Come back to Texas. Deep in the heart Texas deep in the heart deep in the heart it's a little corny for my taste okay speaking of singing I do want a Heath Bar Blizzard though

so that song did shut up dude okay sorry Brett I'll holler on with you speaking of singing this is going out of order Dave but Baby Seals it has been revealed

have the early what do you want to call them evolutionary traits of singing. How? Because they can change their pitch and their level of voice based on their environment. Do they have bars, though? Can you imagine walking up to a baby and they say they do lower pitch in their voice

because it travels farther in the ocean? Why are you doing Michael Jackson? in the ocean. Why are you doing Michael Jackson? Why was the funniest internet video, The Lion, where they just dubbed over like someone...

It was really good. We were actually talking about evolutionary hands or something earlier. Really? Dylan's like trying to figure out how fingerprints work or some shit.

Fingerprints? This is a shower thought for you. Okay. How weird are fingerprints? They're pretty weird. They're unique to your person. They're super unique. They identify you because of that.

Fucking crazy. I think they're grippy. They are crazy. You know buttholes do the same thing. What do they do? Every butthole is unique. Every butthole is unique. That's in the Tushy copy.

You don't like... We've got to identify the perp here. Let's see what his butthole looks like. All right.ole is unique. It's in the Tushy copy. Yeah, but you don't like, oh, we've got to identify the perp here. Let's just see what his butthole looks like. All right, all right. All right, drop him. Yep. That would be a heck of a lineup. Yes.

With the Dick's Saloon at the door, it's just like, all right. Yep, one in, one out. Let me see your vaccine card. Don't ask Aaron Rodgers that. Have you heard that news? Oh, we have. Okay. We have. Man. Just imagine a baby seal. It's heard that news? Oh, we already have. Okay. We have.

Man. Just imagine a baby seal. It's like, baby lock them doors and turn them. Josh Turner. So this baby seal. Lock the doors and turn the lights down low. He's got range. That's what they've described.

This is an all-time tough episode for people who hate it when we sing. Henry Ruggs was driving 156 miles per hour. That is far too fast. Not only did he kill a 23-year-old woman, and that's tragic, he also killed a dog. Not good. Can I say... It's just too fast. How did... How does... How do you survive that?

I'm gonna... Like... I don't know. No idea. Unbelievable. You want to hear this taco news now that we've really... Tacos in space? Yeah, say it. Tacos in space! That's the name of the segment.

They grew hatch chilies, Dave, on the space station. Green chilies, to be exact. Okay. In plant habitat dash zero four. Hatch chili is a big player around here. Hatch chili stinks. What's his name? Had like a whole farm that he grew on Mars.

You see that? Mark Wahlberg? No. That was Matt Damon. Matt Damon. Matt Damon. Same fucking guy. So, yeah, consider me not impressed by hatch chilis in space.

Why didn't they just grow them in New Mexico where I think most people grow them? Yeah. Because they wanted to prove, Dave, that biodiversity was possible in space. So where are they done? That's a good answer. What's that? Where were they grown? In space.

Like on the space station. On the station. Oh. You know they grow year-round. They just have one week where you go to Central Market and you can't get anything that doesn't have hatched chili. Like your cereal is hatched chili cereal. What?

Everything is hatched chili. Hatched chili Oreos. Hatched chili is kind of weird. No, stop. They have Hatch Chili Oreos. Hatch Chili is kind of mid. No, stop. They have Hatch Chili Oreos. No, they don't. They even dye the cream green. You're lying.

Swear. Swear to God. Everything there is Hatch Chili at one point. It's terrible. They just roll back. And I don't really like Hatch Chili all that much. I don't like it that much. The only pimento cheese you can get at the grocery store during Hatch Chili season is

fucking Hatch Chili pimento cheese. I don't want Hatch Chili in there. You said they're year-round. How's season because that's what they that's what they they rep at central marketing yeah it's just marketing former former uh mail-in host kayla could riff on this for like an hour that's just really she hates hatch chili fest oh i'm still mad at fucking central market for not bringing back passport to london oh yeah dude you talk about that shit all the time dude i even sent them an email and they completely shut me down. That's probably because of the ongoing global pandemic. I'm trying to catch

a meat pie, Dave. This weekend in fun. No one catches a meat pie. They had a tikka masala meat pie that just went hard. Oh, that sounds delightful. Have you done the lobster shepherd's pie at Fixed Yet, Will? No, you haven't invited me. You want to go today? No.

I'm not going downtown today. She's a NASA astronaut. She made her, quote, best space tacos yet, which included fajita beef, rehydrated tomatoes, artichokes, and a homegrown hatch chili. Can you imagine how bad the space station would smell if they brought a plate of just firing fajitas out there? Just out there cooking the fajitas in the engine? Don't sizzle in the boosters. You can't do the engine. Don't sizzle in the boosters. You can't do that. Jim, stop sizzling in the boosters.

Zero gravity sizzle. What if they're not good? I think there's only one bathroom on the space station. Yeah, you've got to be careful doing that. You can't just kick out the window and stick your butt out like a boat or some shit. Is that what they do?

No. Megan McArthur. Yeah. Megan just blowing it up in there after her fajitas. Somebody's definitely done that on the space station. Sizzling fajitas? With shut-down pants? Like blowing up the bathroom.

People are like, oh, come on. Come on. It takes forever to poop in the space station, I think. Why? Why? I think just logistically it's difficult. No gravity to push it out. Gravity doesn't push poop out.

It does. It doesn't. You're the one that doesn't push. You're right. You always lecture me about pushing. It's bad for your shit. That's how you get hemorrhoids, man. Don't push.

Just let it happen. Dude, I'm 34 and I've never had a hemorrhoid. I'm good. Stop pushing, dude. No, my methodology is fine. Did Randy get loose? What? The dogs are just going.

Our neighbor's got a lab. Randy, this has piqued my dog's attention. We just got dogs going in the office. Thunder everywhere. What's he doing? It's loco out here. Damn. We got to wrap this thing up.

Nah, let's go forever. Brett killed this pod. I love it. Randy, can we transition this to a live show and we just never stop recording? We should go live. We haven't done a happy hour live in a minute. Let's get one off soon. I'm fine with it.

Let's wrap this up. Fine. We've got to get out of here so we can clip that thunder clip. Yeah. Did you hear that? You obviously heard it. You felt it. Oh, yeah.

It was right outside our window. I saw it. Are our cars okay? Don't you? Weren't you the one that thinks that lightning and thunder weren't related yeah that was will nah dude not sure who that could have possibly been you've been damn dude dude i thought it had to do with the weather systems colliding you're crazy i mean in a way they do yeah but i didn't i didn't think it actually had to do with the weather systems colliding. You're crazy. I mean, in a way they do. Yeah, but I didn't think it actually had to do with the lightning striking. I thought they were... I did think they were separate until I was 34 years

old. Who taught you? I did. Well, dude, I actually did. I actually did a project on thunder when I was in third grade because I was so scared of it that they decided... You retained zero of that information? Yeah, who would have thought? I'm dumb these days. You guys will find out during the geography the geography bid video dropping oh my god I

can't even talk I do better than you uh hard to say you'll have to watch the video and find out somebody just tell me no one knows except for me I know how you did compared to me tell me no I'm not gonna tell you Dave's the only one that I don't know how he did but I know I did not finish first you got one right that I did not get right and I'm embarrassed I'm there's one that I don't know how he did. But I know I did not finish first. You got one right that I did not get right. And I'm embarrassed. There's one that I'm embarrassed about. Stop. Make him watch the vid.

We're getting out of here. Say bye, Dylan. You're cucking the vid. Bye.