Circling Back - Ron Hamburger And Bendy Towers

Episode Date: January 10, 2022

KJ fills in for Vacation Will as the guys discuss their weekends, Bob Saget's legacy, Dave makes it right with KJ, a SF tower that is slowly falling over, milk production, and KJ takes us down memory lane. Support us on Patreon and receive weekly episodes for as low $5 per month: www.patreon.com/circlingbackpodcast Purchase a Circling Back Candle: www.vellabox.com/circling-back Watch all of our full episodes on YouTube: www.youtube.com/washedmedia Shop Washed Merch: www.washedmedia.shop •    (0:00) Fun & Easy Banter     •    (11:16) Recapping This Weekend in Fun     •    (23:35) RIP Bob Saget     •    (32:14) Dave Makes it Right     •    (40:05) This Tower is Bendy     •    (50:30) This Week in Milk •    (57:40) KJ's Segment Support This Episode’s Sponsors     •    Liquid IV: liquidiv.com and use code CIRCLINGBACK for 25% off     •    Truebill: truebill.com/circling     •    Cuts: cutsclothing.com/steam (15% off) --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/circling-back/message Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

all right we're back it's the circling back podcast presented by Vizzy Hard Seltzer. It's the only hard seltzer with super fruit acerola, therefore antioxidant vitamin C. My name's Dave. Wow. Did you like that? I did like that. You didn't know if I was going to stick the landing, but I did. I'm Dave. I'm hosting Will is in Cabo, as you've probably seen.

Looks like a fun little trip. That voice you just heard interrupting my intro was Dylan. Dylan's back. He's shacking it out. He sounds terrible, but he's here. I don't know if I really interrupted you. You kind of looked at me as if it was my turn to say something, so I spoke up.

But, yes, I am back in the studio. Very happy to be here. Took a little brief hiatus. You were gone off that cron. I had what some people refer to as uh covet 19 uh you know here i am i survived it we're good i think we're it's an important reminder that we are in the middle of an ongoing global pandemic that's true i think just everyone should just get it and just get it out of the way and then then we'll just go back to, like, life. You know?

If we all got it at the same time, around the same time, you know? This dude's got nerd immunity. Let's get those antibodies just absolutely popping, just busting, all together as a cohesive unit. Let's just move on. What are you doing? I was a misfire. I don't normally do the circling backboard. It's okay.

That's why Will's a pro. I would say all the women in STEM out there are probably cringing at your very baseball Tommy John surgery thought process on COVID. Everyone should get Tommy John surgery. We'll throw faster after this. Do some people say that? Yeah. I've heard that.

Like there are, you know, Pete Marinovich dads out there that are like, let me get my high schoolers some Tommy John in high school. Park's got some baseball stuff over Christmas, and he actually likes to play. So I think about getting him some Tommy John surgery next week. Just get a head start. You want to get him some Tommy John surgery. You just get one of them, not some of them. You will have exactly one Tommy John surgery on his right arm, his throwing arm.

This other guy sitting directly next to me, borderline uncomfortably close. Okay, fair. Probably dwarfing me on camera, as he is a larger man than I. Okay. KJ. It's KJ. Well, I appreciate it. It's the internet's own kj well thank you and welcome back to myself

uh after about i don't know four with four-ish weeks out of the studio um it was a very unintentional but you know during the move and the holidays and whatnot things did not fall in my favor to make this trip down as i was picking my seat today i realized dylan had basically replaced me with the world's largest uh water canteen over there so it's like you know what i get the message um so showing something that's like there to scale to make dylan you know look bigger it is this massive water unit this thing's great man it looks fantastic does that hold water um it currently holds water it can it's what's interesting about it is it holds pretty much whatever you put in it. Okay.

If you want to keep a liquid hot. For example, Bay and I got this new bing bong maker for Christmas. It's pretty nice. It'll hold bing bong, keep it hot, piping hot. Is it a debongy? No, it's not. I'm sorry. Let's start over.

But yeah, there's currently water in it. So is it really the case that Will was taking a second vacation in consecutive weeks out of respect for like pre-MLK Day? That's where he is? I think that's right. Yeah. Something like that, yeah. Every time he takes a family vacation with his in-laws i always you know i think about alexander daddario and white lotus um then i go to google and then i go back to

thinking about will on vacation with his in-laws i'm like you know both clearly have bomb d's and both are like you know uh excuse me they have to play well into the bigger picture, all the gravity of the in-law situation. I hope he's having a great time in Paradise. Did you say they have bomb Ds? Yeah, Will and Alexander Daddario. DeFreeze, Daddario, like their names. Okay.

Are you sure that's what you're going for there? I think so. I think so. What are you doing? What are you doing? I'm saying I miss Will. And most people, after hearing that whole verbal word salad probably do too. You know how we used to say like Dave's in the horny chair?

You know, you sometimes say that. I was in the horny chair. You were always in the perv chair. Wherever you sit is just a horny chair, KJ. He just follows you around, man. I am very H positive, if that's what you're implying. He's horny positive, he says. H positive, if that's what you're implying.

He's horny positive, he says. In the year 2022, I would like more people to, you know, go out in their front lawn and kind of like salute your shorts where you just raise up your shorts and that's how the show started. Just let that freak flag fly in 2022. That joke's lost on him. He's never experienced the greatness of an awful waffle. It's kind of like a blue waffle, but it's purple. Okay. AJ, what is going on?

What is your deal? I've not been here in months. You haven't talked to a professional about this? You know, in a crowded small space with, you know, my wife and my child, there's been nowhere to get the H out. Do you want to announce that you had the vid recently as well for the second time? I won't let Dylan sit on that island or Randy, you know, make content out of doing that alone.

But, you know, rumors are probably positive that the week following New Year's, your boy had some significant sinus infection-like symptoms. Some simpties? Some simpties. But, you know, being that I was special K and sure boosted in the fall, it was a pretty quick Passover. Back to...

Not Passover. Not to move on too quickly from your experience there, but did you see the freeze in company on vacation? You see the matching shirts that they all have? Yeah, where can we cop? Why don't you say that? Cabo Crew 22. And they're

color coordinated. Each family unit has their own color, I believe. See, I don't like that. The whole crew has the same pattern, but the color is specific per immediate family. I think it needs to be one unit. I agree. I don't like the factions. It just... Why not just bridge the divide? immediate i think it needs to be one unit i i agree i don't like the factions it's just it

why why why not just bridge the divide um what is uh i guess the best way to say is a little show we do called too much dip this you know uniquely the same three of us it sounds exactly like this but with sports uh we do a live stream on thursdays at 6 30 i was late this past thursday I was present in the green room, and the three of you could watch me squirming, trying to hang up the phone so I could be present on the live stream. I didn't have a chance to bring attention to the fact that I, too, was wearing a family Christmas shirt that memorialized the family Christmas of 2021. I didn't have a chance to wear it on Christmas. I forgot to bring mine.

So that was my way of like participating. Fun fact about me. I've never participated in a family event where we had custom t-shirts. I've also never been to a family reunion. But guess what? I kind of want to. Just for like a self-aware, like let's do do it for the jokes that go along with it. You're going to lean into the irony.

I can't speak for the young crew, if there's some self-awareness with these T-shirts. I think there is. Why did Will change his avi to just a white circle on everything? It's oatmeal. Oh, is it? I think that's oatmeal. Oh, buddy, I'm sorry.

Oh, this is a colorblind thing, huh? Well, I mean, you made it that way by even commenting on it. I've got the same question, though. I'm... It is oatmeal, right? I don't fucking... You should know this, Randy. This seems like it's in your wheelhouse.

He doesn't have a mic. Is he protesting? Or, you know, is this like a... It's like... He wants to be silent so all of the Kellogg's employees and their strike will be heard. He's standing with all of the people who work at the steel cut oatmeal. I don't think Quaker Oats is a Michigan thing. In fact, I want to say Battle Creek is Kellogg's specifically.

But nevertheless, we all know Will is big on that oatmeal game. So you're in our thoughts, Will. Hurry back. If you guys don't mind, I would love to recap this weekend in fun. Presented by Liquid IV. Not liquid. That's something different. Liquid IV.

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gotta stay hydrated man i was a cherry lemonade fan somebody i think that's what alissa hooked me up with at the uh holiday party she brought a couple packs of that i'd never tried it your boy was back as you all knew like by 10 a.m the next day because i was just just, you know, I feel great. I feel good. Liquid IV saved the day. Contains five essential vitamins, B3, B5, B6, B12, and vitamin C, of course, with three times the electrolytes of traditional sports drinks. Made with premium ingredients, non-GMO, and free from gluten, dairy, and soy. It's all about the science of CTT, cellular transport technology, designed to enhance rapid absorption of water and other key ingredients into the bloodstream. One stick of Liquid IV in 16 ounces of water hydrates faster and more efficiently than water alone.

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Promo code circling back. Since my weekend was probably the worst. Oh, okay. Go ahead. Go ahead, man. I'll just get out of the way. I had COVID. I didn't do anything.

I took Stella on a couple walks. You've got to get that vitamin D. Yeah. So it's good to get outside. And that was a highlight of my weekend was taking Stella on walks, watching football. KJ, how about it, man? No, no, no, no.

Oh, wow. Anything else? Any dope meals? Did you cook? Did you all get crazy? We ordered in a few times. Oh, Bate made some bomb-ass tortilla soup. You know your boy loves tortilla soup.

That's what we're looking for. Not a big soup guy. Chicken tortilla soup, to be clear. Very, very good. Bay knows how to work the kitchen, dog. What's the... Okay, dog. I know it's a new area to you, but do you feel like you've upgraded your local restaurant routine game?

I know, again, it's a recent change, but in your immediate bubble, do you feel like you've upgraded the places that are around you? No, no. He didn't eat out last week. He was at home sick. Okay, well. David. Did you hear? Okay.

I'm actually in a pretty poor restaurant area. Got it. Not great. I don't know if that's. I was about to say that's the only category that would describe one of the nations. Not many good places to eat around there. Will's favorite place, Mahdi's Mexican food is close to me. We've gone there.

I know why Will hates that place so much. You know what? I think I'm going to call him out on it. You know what? The mutual friends that Will and I have, including Hot Colin, that circle of friends is very pro-Motti's. And I think that whenever Will gets drunk there,

it's with a very loud and can be obnoxious people that I love dearly. Let me say this. Group of people. That's why Will hates Motties. They make a, I'll go as far to say, good margarita. Whoa. They make a good margarita.

Dude, hold on. Their food. A good margarita. Their food is fine. Yeah. It's not going to knock your dick off. Yeah, you're not going to walk out of there without a dick unless you walked in there with that one.

It's not going to change your life. But they're also not going to charge you. It's fine. It is what it is. What if you really did go to a place and the meal was so good, you went to go to the men's room and you looked down and it was off. It was like down in your pant leg. You've got to sue them at that point. Like, look, this place is good, but now I live my life without a...

Like, sir, I think you dropped this. Like, oh, jeez, that meal must have been pretty fire. Oh, your food must have been really good because I see your things on the floor. I knew the food was good, but I didn't know. I was going to lose my schlong. Okay. My penis. No, I'm not.

Don't look to me to be the third commentary on the de-reattachment service at Mottie's. Two steaks? No. Anyway. That's fantastic stuff, man. Well, we're glad you're back. I know it was a chill sitch. I don't know if y'all's weather was as borderline miserable

as it was up north. Saturday sucked. Yes. Overcast, wet. Yes. Downright moist. Damp. Daddy likes it like that, though.

Okay. Weather. Yes. No one liked what Saturday was. I do. I like the changing of season. I like extreme cold weather. I like wet. I like to be cozy inside when it's nasty outside. That's my thing. I agree. I guess

my only request is I would like some consistency. Give me a straight four or five-day chunk of one thing. And what we had Saturday, you know, when we're talking about the weather, we're talking about nothing. But what we had Saturday, it, like, blew in that day, ruined the whole day, and then it was gone the next day. And the next day was just mess. I'm like, all right, whatever, forgettable. But what your boy did this weekend was all around pretty average.

We also have been settling into a new abode. For those who don't pay attention on too much dip, I sold my house in December. We are renting for a short period of time in the Dallas-Fort Worth area. So we've been just, you know, getting settled, even though it's only a six-month stop, Getting settled, even though it's only a six-month stop, which included hanging photos, all of that good jazz. Kai, my son, started a new daycare this week, so that was major. Transitioned to a toddler bed, also major. Ooh, big ups to Kai. So just stuff around the house. Absolutely nobody's asking for this recommendation, but Red Disclosure it is featuring the rock and Gal Gadot on a Netflix.

You know, if you ain't got nothing better to do, it's, it's nothing good, but ain't gonna, it's not the worst thing out there. Watch that a little bit. Your boy also set the X-Box X-Box back up. So look out. Look out. I don't know. I keep promising myself I'm going to get back into Warzone, and it just hasn't happened. I'm still very hesitant for Bay to see me with the headset on,

so I don't even know if I can do it at this point. It might be like when she's out of town sort of thing. Yeah. Again, you'll find your staggered bedtimes saves the world. Speaking of losing your manhood. I wanted her to stay attracted to me, you know. If she sees me on the sticks, it might be ballgame. Sounds like somebody doesn't have a man cave.

It's this guy. I'm editing audio is all you have to say, but then I guess the controller and the screen would give it away. What'd you do, David? Hey, thank you for asking, KJ. Friday, did a little something crazy. Okay. A little mud on the tires?

We got a little mud on the tires, and by that I mean we went to a strip mall sushi place. Okay. This ain't your grandma's strip mall sushi place, though. First time, or you've been there? First time. We have some friends who really, really enjoy it. A lot of people do, turns out.

Eurasia. It's over in, I think it's Oak Hill, technically. Oak Hill, part of town. Great spot. Really good sushi. Would absolutely,

I mean, and it's five minutes away and it's not super expensive unless unless you order like a bunch of stuff that not necessarily is getting eaten. I'm not going to name any names. But very good spot.

Had a good time. Had our friends come back over to our place. We brought the Rhodes man to Eurasia. He was eating some white rice. He's just like his daddy. Loves white rice. One of my favorite foods was just a hint of soy. Just a classy amount of soy.

Saturday, woke up. Weather was just bad. It rained a little bit in the morning, but then the rest of the day, no sun, and it was cool out. It was almost like it was in transition, didn't know what it was going to do. So I didn't do anything. Stayed in, watched football all day. More of that on Too Much Dip

Which we will record right after this On KJ's recommendation We are now about six episodes into An HBO show I believe it is an adaptation of a book Potentially Station Eleven Dylan, I think you'd like it

It is post-apocalyptic. Think Walking Dead, sans zombies, better acting. Okay. No Rick, which is sad because there are, in fact, walkers out there. Walkers out there. Out there. Carl. You don't have to listen to me.

Okay. Where's Carl? Carl. Some of us still enjoy it, but it's okay. Yeah, the two people who still watch Walking Dead are in this room. It's Randy and KJ. If you told me it ended six years ago, I would believe you. That would have been nice if it did, honestly.

That's fine. We won't have watch parties at the Chivalry Household. I understand. But Station Eleven is, I do recommend it. I'm not finished with the season and or series. I don't know if it's going to be a multi-year thing or multi-season thing. So if it doesn't land, I don't need to hear it. Not there yet.

But I'm enjoying the ride. Go ahead. That's about it. I'm finding it very good. Oh, I started reading a book. Oh, look at the big brain on David. You can read. That's awesome. Your boy reads reads and this is not look the last six books i've consumed have been via audiobook okay this one i went out and

purchased to own and it's not it's it's a completely easy read and the only reason i'm doing this is because it dawned on me that this is my all-time favorite movie and i've never read the novel that it's based off of but yes i am about 46 pages into the godfather the novel oh i thought you were saying that white man can't jump i didn't know that was a non-fiction story no actually the pest the uh the adaptation featuring john liguizamo no see i'm reading a book your boy reads do you read you probably don't i actually just started a book too i ordered a book yesterday too look at us book nerds is it uh jordan peterson what is it no it's it's called we do and it's a it's a pre-marriage it's a pre-marriage like oh okay it's i'll stop there no no no this is a i do i'm genuinely interested what the folks at home was it required of you to read or this is something that two of you agreed, hey, let's read this?

Bae purchased two copies, one for herself, one for me. But I do enjoy stuff like this. Agreed. I like self-help, learning about the human brain kind of stuff. This is just written by, you know, like a relationship guru, doctor type. And it's, we just started it, but there are exercises along the way and it's you just get your head right for for marriage and make sure you're doing it the right way kind of stuff this guy you know i wholeheartedly support proactive wholeheartedly support yeah you know

my mindset on those sorts of things has always been it's you know training the workplace whatever it might be you can go through those things and you don't have to take all of it with you or like it doesn't have to be your gospel but you find something that's useful and you carry it forward. There's no reason to be resistant to self-growth. I appreciate that plug. I'm trying to pull up the book that I ordered so that David can read the title of it and share it with the class, but I don't know if I'll be able to scramble to it quick enough. Let's see. No, I don't know. It's not going to show up. I'll buy you some time.

Don, I'm proud of you for reading. Thanks, David. You too, man. That's really cool. A lot of people don't know this. That's actually a Christmas book. I'm glad you're recognizing that. Yeah.

One of the all-time greats. Let's just say you had like a Don Corleone impression, just ready to go. What would that sound like? But it's Don Corleone impression, just ready to go. What would that sound like? But it's Don Corleone doing Christopher Walken, ordering the chicken wings from Taco Bell. Go ahead. That's just too many layers.

That's too many layers. No, no, no. The chicken wings, not the... Let me just do a live from the movie. Oh. Okay, do Christopher Walken ordering the chicken. You're with Randy. No, but you're with Randy

and you're at Taco Bell late night ordering the chicken wings from Taco Bell. I'm against the chicken you're with randy no but you're with randy and you're at taco bell late night ordering the chicken wings from taco against the the chicken wings i thought i think i crushed that sorry you what are you ordering here i don't ever go against the chicken wings okay to them get the chicken wings okay kj that's your fault there you go there's the book i'm reading give me credit for absolutely knocking that out of the park. Oh, crap. Potty training. Everything modern parents need to know to do it once and do it right. By Jamie Kowacki.

Probably. Oh, wacky Kowacki. I think it's with a G, but whatever. Yeah, so your boy's diving into potty training. I figure if there's going to be an effort to have two children that are not in diapers. Can we throw it in reverse and back up just like a minute and give proper respect to my impression that I just did? I did the Taco Bell bell. A Don Corleone, ask Christopher Walken ordering from Taco Bell.

It was so perfect, and no one even said anything, except for Randy looked up, which I think is a sign that I passed up. Randy's on his phone over there. He's not even listening. He's posting a TikTok mid-show. You know what? I'm going to mark it down. That was about 20.

Is he really? No. I'll call it 21 and a half minutes in. I'm going to send this over to Randy. Sometimes you got to live Moss. Okay. Bob Saget passed away at 65. Yeah.

Dylan Duggs. Is this a sports party? Walking. That is Don Corleone. Okay. Bob Saget passed away at age 65. Yeah, I saw that. That's very sad.

Thank you. Do we know what happened? Per the sheriff's department, does not look like foul play. Does not look like drug use. Is he sick? Did he have COVID? No, he was performing. He was on a comedy tour. Does not look like drug use. Is he sick? Do you have COVID? No, he was performing. He was on a comedy tour.

He didn't perform with COVID. Sure, you can, but it wasn't like he was in the hospital. He died in the hotel room. So I don't know. Maybe he had COVID. Maybe it hit him hard. Hours before he did. But that's speculating.

He had posted that he didn't really, like he posted a selfie from the stage. I want to say Buffalo, Syracuse. No, Jacksonville. That's why it stood out. You're close. He was in Jacksonville. And basically said, thanks again to whoever did the intro for him or opened for him. Didn't realize I did a two-hour set.

You guys were amazing. It was Wes and Dill. I am legitimately addicted to this again. And, you know, sweaty, glossy-eyed. And that was his last tweet. Goes to the hotel, checked out. Passes away at 65. Of course, most know him from his time at Full House

as the father figure, the patriarch of the Tanner family. Danny? Mm-hmm. Danny. Got to tell you, was never a huge full house guy. Deny is here. Not saying it was a bad show, but it just wasn't in my rotation. I was more of a TGIF kid growing up, step by step.

I fucked with it on the low. Okay. If it was on, I'd watch it and I'd enjoy it. I never looked for it, you know. Just caught. If it was on, I'd watch it and I'd enjoy it. I never looked for it, you know. Just caught it when it was on. I enjoyed it. The Olsen sisters were there. I was there.

That Kimmy Gibbler, man. What a pest. We're the same age, so I was there at the right time. As were they. Okay. I'm just... Yeah, but they were children in the show. I was a child in the house.

Does that check out? I think it i think i think it does okay uh you were a child in the house yes let's let's dig in on that does that mean it was inaccurate either way i was in the apartment probably but no um i i loved full house um one of the first if not i guess the first podcast for the adventure I did, whatever you want to call it. My first podcast was called Partial Recall, where each episode focused on some nostalgia bit. And we did a full house and maybe Fresh Prince episode, kind of mashed together those 90s sitcoms. And it was one of those things where i was like yeah i remember watching some of these and i went back and watched a couple episodes and i didn't realize as i was going through season by season just seeing okay which one do i want to re-watch like

a it'd run about six or seven seasons maybe a little bit longer but b like i'd watched a heavy percentage of them because back then it's not like oh you had the dvd set or the netflix where you knew you'd watched a full season of these things um so yeah I I guess I was a huge fan of of everything full house and you know it sucks but I don't know that I don't know if it's where I'm at in life or if it's just that I did not connect Bob's set connect to him at this point in life where I'm like oh man, man, this just breaks my heart, you know, a la Sidney Poitier from over the weekend. Obviously he's also a stand-up comic, right? I remember being shocked at seeing,

like catching a glimpse of who he was outside the show. Yeah. Be like, oh, this guy's actually like a very foul-mouthed, like edgy comedian and like admired that he got away with playing such a wholesome dad figure on the show when that was not at all who he was like like outside he came up in that stand-up generation of you do you know you're doing the clubs that's how you're you're making your ends meet and you're hoping just to get a sitcom and of course it's a sitcom so it's going to neuter you and you're going to have to work sitcom and of course it's a sitcom so it's going to neuter you

and you're going to have to work a little bit cleaner he worked like the cleanest on full house and i remember seeing when i saw half baked for the first time which was like what 1998 or something i was just about to bring that up half baked his uh his role his cameo is uh you ever you ever ask some d for weed no coke no no oh yeah we weed yeah marijuana is not a drug yeah i used to sd for for coke he ever has d for weed just uh just a great back and forth with chapelle um and that was the moment when i realized oh the dude from america's obviously i was more of a bob saget america's funniest home videos oh yes that was a show he that was a good show the thing about that show is that they found the the funniest videos in america from home right right david can i break some news to you that i was not aware of that will affect both of us oh yes dirty work norman

probably the highlight of his career. Okay. We've both talked about this at length. I watched for the first time a couple months ago. So, wow. Yeah, he and Norm were very, very, very good friends. And if you've seen the roast of Bob Saget, which that clip has been making the rounds of Norm's set, his eight-minute set roasting, I do that in quotes, of Bob Sag set, his eight-minute set, roasting. I do that in quotes of Bob Saget.

You can tell. He ends it by saying, like, hey, look, I love Bob Saget. Very heartfelt. Very sad that we lost both of them in the last six months. God, when was Norm? Norm was fairly recent, right, a few months ago? Yeah. God, man.

Then we lost Betty White, Cindyindy portier been been uh been tough yeah you know uh losing two 99 year olds still worth eulogizing um so it's it's loss is difficult regardless if it's expected or not and when it's like a celebrity death it's kind of one of those things where like you don't want to overexpose yourself to feel like you've got a connection with someone who didn't. But when it's somebody like this who played like a pivotal role in something that's like very nostalgic, which always like feels very personal to people or, you know,

whatever they might've experienced back when they were enjoying those things, it can seem so much more significant. I was never really, I don't know that i saw half baked until probably five or ten years after it had been out so it just was never like in my wheelhouse of a movie um and then with his career after that like i didn't watch how i met your mother which he was the narrator on which was on for like seven or eight years didn't know that never watched it ironically they're the sequel or spinoff of that, led by Hilary Duff, where it's How I Met Your Mother, starts tonight,

and somebody else is doing the narration. So for all of this to happen all at once, yeah. Any thoughts on Hilary Duff just in general? I'd risk it all. Every day, twice. Somebody in a group text that KJ and I are in was very, very, very in on Hilary duff over the weekend it's i mean i've said in the past um my pre-game for athletics warm-up song you know a

little cd situation included hillary duff come clean again none of that is innuendo and all of that is 1000 true big fan over here of that is 1,000% true. Big fan over here. Anyways, some of his last and most recent work, to bring it back to something we were talking about earlier, Nickelodeon's unfiltered episode, Dreaming of an Awful Waffle. Ironically, we mentioned that earlier. Dylan.

But he was also on The Masked Singer. I'll forgive him for that because the rest of his career was great. Yeah, I could go without knowing that he had any involvement in The Masked Singer. Of course, that's a show where the singer is masked and the judges have to guess who it might be. They're running out of ways to reconfigure this stupid format. Have you seen the new one? There's a hologram one.

There's a hologram. There's one now where they have to guess just by looking at someone whether they can sing or not. And I'm almost interested in that just to see if who can step on like a land mind who can do something problematic i can see your voice it isn't their one yeah yeah they're dressed as like different animals or something too isn't there some stupid shit like that the furby singer or i might be or furry a furry good voice what's furby i think it's all mass singers probably the same furby was a little toy the 90s. They talked to each other.

Randy's nodding. It was like a living Tamagotchi that talked to one another, mixed with a gremlin. Anyways, this is going over the heads of several people born after 2000, so I apologize. They're here for the banter. Let's save that note on the masked singer. We'll save that for too much dip.

We need some bet payoff alternatives. So maybe those can come to play. RIP Bob Saget. Indeed. I got something I need to make right here. This segment is called Dave Needs to Make It Right. I'm Dave. I'm hosting.

I normally don't host. If you're new to this podcast and you're tuning in and you're like, this isn't that good, it's my fault. This isn't my normal chair. That's okay. I'm doing the best I can and that's all you can ask for. I've already said he had bomb D. We don't need to inflate his ego more when he listens back to this on the plane back from Mexico. You know, I wasn't really sure

where you're going with that and after this podcast, I'm going to show you where I thought you were going. What are you going to make it right on? I showed up here today with my backpack, as I often do. Inside that backpack is my laptop, the laptop charger, some binders full of women. Really? No, I brought my lunch today.

And why that's significant is normally on Mondays, KJ comes down here, we normally order lunch. And I took a trip to Whole Foods yesterday. I left that out of this weekend in fun. And I bought a bunch of lunch meat. I bought some organic pesto. I bought some sourdough, easy tiger sourdough, by the way, which you can get at most grocery stores.

Fantastic. So I made a sandwich this morning, and I brought a protein shake to go with it. It wasn't a whole beast. Liver King would not approve, but neither here nor there. So I kind of threw off the lunch plans so much so that KJ was scrambling to put in a lunch order for the rest of the guys who now Randy all of a sudden doesn't make his lunch. He's too good to make his lunch now after being like a stand, a standout, bring your home, bring your lunch from home guy for like the first two years of his, of his tenure here. That was North. Turned down every, every lunch we threw at him. He would turn it down. We'd be like, Hey, we're going to, we're going to Perry's for something like a really nice steak. Yeah. He's like, no, I got this burrito

that I made a couple of days ago. I got a bologna sandwich instead. Y'all go have your pork chops. I got these low-sodium sardines in this can. I'm kidding. I got Pop-Tarts and Pringles. Don't worry about it. No, he actually does make good lunches. I've seen them. But, KJ, I thought I maybe ruined your day by putting this upon you.

Not at all. I'm usually pretty adept at saying, okay, hey, let's pick a restaurant, let's put it in order, and let's get it done. And I'm one that's pretty, like, I like change, like variety in some scenes. And when we do our group orders, it's usually either we'll do a sandwich

or we'll do a market that, you know, is of recent times or modern, if you will. Oh, so like a new twist on an old favorite? Exactly. It's like a modern twist. Oh, that sounds. That's cool, man. Exactly.

So I wanted to mix it up and go with a place called Cava, I believe, right? It's probably Cava. Or Cava. Cava. Who knows? No one's doing Cava. No, no, no. Bee right? It's probably Cava. Or Cava. Cava. Who knows? No one's doing Cava. No, no, no. Bee Cave.

No, it's a chain. It's not. Either way. I was like, all right, let's try Cava. It's similar enough. Let's at least check it out. If you want to be smug about it, you can say Cava. I've only had it once, so I figured let's try it.

Got the orders from the group. I go to their website and it didn't let you like edit the actual item i'm not going to say who but some people in here hate cucumber yeah just say it to me cucumbers stink fair cucumbers fair i hey i'm not arguing i tried to make sure it was right for you i didn't that wasn't a big deal i figured i hit edit no cucumber place order and let me do that so i said know what? Let's go back to the market that is somewhat modern and stylish. Put it in the order. Great. Then I messed up. I ordered it for like immediate and nobody's trying to eat lunch at 10 AM. So then I tried to call him, say, hey, push that to 12. We're good to go, and I did.

Guy answered the phone. Thanks for calling Kava. What's the name on the order? I said, Ellis. Great, we'll push it to 12. I hang up, and everybody's like, oh, wait, we ordered Kava? I'm like, fuck. It was just a cluster.

You were in a tailspin, man. It was a cluster. You guys are still looking for your order. The best part, tell him what you said. Tell him what you said about the hypothetical guy with the last name. Yeah, somebody with the name Ellis out there is just going to be searching for their order at like 1030. And me, the asshole in this scenario, like pushed it back to noon. And he's, you know, he's probably going to get help with that.

So you think some dude named like Josh Ellis put an order in an hour ago? There's a guy named Josh Ellis out there. Shouts. What if it's Greg Ellis, former Cowboy Crew? Oh, wow. North Carolina alum, I believe, are great. Yeah, if it's Greg Ellis, my apologies. He represented the family well.

Yeah, I don't know, man. Look, I'm going to start bringing my lunch more. I'm just putting it out there. I'm fine with handling the orders. It just was a little bit of a mix-up on mine. And then when you call freaking ModMarket, you know, non-spawn, they've got like a whole customer service portal that's not on site. You call them, it's like rebooking a flight.

They're like, okay, we'll call the location for you. Please hold. And he goes like full keyboard in the background to like redo my reservations just to push like a sandwich order back. And I'm like, all right, man. So that's on me, man. I'm normally the point man on lunch, and I just showed up today with my own. And I threw you guys for a loop. Hey, Austin's changed since I've lived down here.

It's a tech town now. I get it. Elon's really fucked things up. I can't just order some food and call a human being. I feel like you can do that. I did, and I called the wrong human being. You called the wrong human being. Kava, by the way, what did you order from Kava?

We ordered from Modern Market. Oh, right, right, right. See, this is on me. Well, look, I want to talk about something here. We've all been there. Do you know why free trials renew without your consent? It's a business scam out to get you. Truebill.

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to they've saved me hundreds it's fantastic they'll help you too don't fall for subscription scams start canceling today at truebill.com slash circling. Go right now, truebill.com slash circling. It could save you thousands a year. Truebill.com slash circling. New segment, and in fact, transition. Please don't unsubscribe from our Patreon. I was just thinking that, actually. You like that We do a lot of stuff there What was the full announcement last week

Because tonight is another episode Or first episode of Bachelor correct Second So I missed last week Remind because again as somebody who will listen this morning Reset the stage for me For the Bachelor We're not recapping

No capping. I didn't even watch the first episode. Correct. No cap. Well, Hilary Duff will be on tonight, so I'll be there. Find my review live on Twitter at KJLS with the ones with the S. All about that Duff. What are we doing here?

I don't know. So this next segment is called Yo, This Tower is Bendy. Sorry. When you talked to Patreon, my brain went back to Bachelor. Again, it's called, Yo, This Tower is Bendy. Okay. Of course, a reference to a tweet that six of us saw. We've gone out of our way to tell people not to look up. However, I know for a fact some of them have tried.

This is not about the young man who was bendy on the TL. No, this is about a different tower. No, this is a different tower. So there is a tower in San Francisco, which is in California. A lot of people don't know that. And it is a high-rise 58-floor luxury condo building. And as we all know, real estate in San Francisco, not all of us know this, but you're about to,

very expensive. It's a very expensive city in which to reside. That's interesting. Do you have any facts to back that up? No, I don't have any facts. I could pull some, but it might take a little bit, and it's neither here nor there. That's okay.

But there is a tower there, and it is called, let's see, it is called the Millennium Tower. That's a lazy name. I got bad news for people who live in the tower or maybe even next to the tower. It's tilting. It's leaning three inches per year, and it is already leaning a total of 26 inches. It is also sinking at a rapid clip. That seems like two things that you don't want when you're talking about structural integrity.

It has already sunk 17 to 18 inches, when it was predicted to only sink about 5 inches over, I think, like a 35, 40-ish year span. Already 17 to 18 inches. It was constructed in 2009. That seems too recent to have this issue i was what i actually watched a video um last night of a local news crew so this has been discovered a while ago you're really in on this story i am it was discovered he's been researching this for a while this news crew goes to this uh these these two gentlemen who live, I think, on the 50th floor. And they were like, yeah, we figured it out before they announced it. They had a marble in their living room, right, on the wood floor, nice and smooth.

And they roll it. And the marble slows down. Just playing marbles? The marble slows down, busts a bitch, and starts coming back at them. And it always rolls to the same corner of their apartment, which is I think like the northwest or northeast corner of the building. And like, yeah,

this thing, this motherfucker's tilting. It's like a fucking problem. It's a problem. Think about it. Fuck you, tower. And these condos are going for like millions of dollars these are these are not like san francisco it's not your grandma's condo you know my grandma never lived in a condo unfortunately it's sad but i mean i mean think about if you if you live there like

your property value if they don't correct this very quickly and they're trying they got they got some engineers on it they have have Ronald O. Hamburger. I was going to say, but... Which makes it sound like this is from The Onion. The guy's name is Ronald Hamburger. No, no, no, Hamburger. Right. Ronald O. Hamburger.

Why did they include the middle initial? They didn't need to include... They could have just put Ron Hamburger. But to be clear, that's the guy they've got in place to fix this is Ron Hamburg. He's an actual structural engineer. That's his actual name.

We actually have some load-bearing walls we need taken down, and we actually called Mr. Hamburg. He's booked up because of this, but he is the guy to call. So this was announced a while ago, like I said, and some people tried to unload their condos. Like, I better sell and get out of this thing while I can. And the value of their property is just going through the floor. It's not great because, again, the building is tilting three inches a year. Well, you know what we say, buy the dip. Might be time to invest in some high-rise property.

What? Okay. Think about this. Buy the dip. Might be time to invest in some high-rise property. What? Okay. Think about this.

What about the structures, the buildings in its path? I mean, they're not going to let it collapse, right? They'll probably tear it down before it got to that point. Maybe a controlled demolition. Exactly. Speaking of Pete Carroll. Okay. There we go. Another truther out there.

People are selling their places for like 25 cents on the dollar. Maybe not that extreme. A short sale? No. They People are selling their places for like 25 cents on the dollar. Maybe not that extreme. A short sale? No. They're just selling at a loss. Which you've got to think you're not able to get it insured. Right. Who's going to insure it?

Right. No one. Because, again, it's leaning. It's tilting. Sorry, 26 inches seems a little extreme. I know they're probably measuring that at the very top of the building, which is like, it seems like a extreme. I know they're probably measuring that at the very top of the building, which is like, but it seems like a lot, no? Yeah, I think for scale, like that's the size of the rims on Dylan's truck.

Yeah. A full rim. You know I'm pushing those 26s. They're spinning. Do you know who calls this tower home? Let me open the curtain here. They're still spinning out in the parking lot. I'll show you.

If you didn't know, they're 26 inches, like the decal on the back of the car. It just says 26 inch. They don't stop. I'll show you if you didn't know there are 26 inches like the decal on the back of the car that just says 26 inch they don't stop let you know uh who lives here okay um it says giants outfielder i will know him as former ranger great hunter pence arlington zone okay yeah true a bigger name they probably should have led with this uh joe montana are you kidding montana or montana not joe montana sadly okay not godfather three's own um when they were asked about what led to this aside from you know what you liberals might think is just straight global warming uh they think that it might have been construction liberals i'll read just one quick paragraph here uh pike suspects the drilling method used to remove soil and water from the

bottom of the hole is to blame. It's no different from sucking a straw into a milkshake. Yeah. He says sucking a straw into a milkshake. Noting that the removal method involves suction, essentially vacuuming up water debris from the bottom of the shaft being drilled. He says the sucking process is likely stressing larger areas of old Bay clay layer under the building's existing foundation. I suck your tower. Let me just say, no one's surprised that the only paragraph KJ chose to read is the one that included shaft and sucking.

I'm an architect. KJ, come on, man. I'm just letting the men and women in STEM out there, some of them engineers of sorts, they want to understand, okay, what's going on here? This is my son and subcontractor. You know, I just don't want them to think there's some, you know, we're just dirty libs trying to tell them not to

roll coal. I'm obviously no engineer. No, no, no. I'm no hamburger. You're no hamburger. But how do you fix this problem? We did this story so we can make fun of this guy's last name. Later in the story. Had this guy's name been like Peter Johnson?

Well, okay. Bad example. Todd Johnson? We would not have done this story. I would have still talked about Todd Johnson drilling and sucking. Todd Johnson is a structural engineer. You got to leave it up to the Ronnie Hamburgers of the world. Apparently, Ron Hamburger feels like everything's okay.

He recently assured city officials the settlement that has occurred during the testing is within expected levels. He's still like, hey, guys, nothing to see here. I don't know, man. I don't know. What'd they do to stop the tilt? They need Alan Jackson to write a song about this. Okay. Is this Remember When or which song are you thinking isn't he the guy who didn't know the difference between iraq and iran

yes you're right because i was he was also remember when but it was the sadder remember when that's a man it's actually iran so i know i was mocking him. Listen to Alan Jackson one time. You don't even chat a hoochie. You've never chatted a hoochie, then don't start acting like you do. Made love and then we cried. Speaking of chat a hoochie rhymes with Mariucci, former coach of the 49ers in San Francisco, Steve Mariucci. Wow, it all comes full circle.

Motherfucker spitting me. Wow. I'm spitting. And that concludes our UNO game. Anyway. Anyway, I will, I'm gonna, I will continue to monitor the story. Chris Jeffries, a founding partner at Millennium

Partners, blamed the tower's structural issues due to the adjacent Trans Bay. Join Powers Authority Transit Hub. How's that? Trans Bay. I don't know. B-A-Y. That doesn't make any sense, though. I don't know if I'm hoping for this to get corrected, or if I want to see, like, them having to blow this building up, which would be kind of fun.

I know how this—you want this to end with controlled demolition. Yeah. And just a massive failure of a project costing lots and lots of people money. Well, if it were Dallas to make this super niche, this would be tied to the pension funds of all of the police officers, teachers, and firefighters in the county. of all of the police officers, teachers, and firefighters in the county. They built a tower in Dallas, and apparently the windows were too bright for a nearby museum, and they got sued for years, and it drained the pension funds. It was a nightmare.

Nightmare. Wow. Yeah, there you go. Some local politics. What do we got next? I'm not done here. There's a 75-foot indoor lap pool, a health club, and a spa, in-house cinema, and a restaurant and wine bar run by celebrity chef Michael Mina.

She's leaning, you know? I only sip lean. I don't lean. They've got some $10 million. Wow. Cheapest apartment, 1.6 milli. Did you hear what I said? Yeah.

I only sip lean. You don't live lean? No. Live, laugh, lean? I don't live in a leaning building. I just sip on it. Live, laugh, lean. They should lean into this whole thing.

I double stack my styros when I do because they'd be leaking through there. Okay. This guy's making up for missing last week. You know what I'm hearing? You know what I mean, KJ? Yeah, I respect it. I was trying to find an E40 tie-in since this is the Bay Area and I got nothing. Clay's back.

I'm not doing a Sprite. Clay's back. He just took it to the rack. Just firing up shots from 40. Clay, he's making up for lost time. Did you guys see this next story? They did call him the Splash Brother before, right? Although I don't like this text.

This is titled This Week in Milk, to be clear. This Week in Milk. I haven't even clicked on the story. I wanted to be surprised here. Farmer gives cows virtual reality orr headsets to reduce anxiety and increase milk production really that doesn't really shock me honestly like i knew vr was going to revolutionize a lot of things and i guess i guess one of the ones i thought was like milk production with vr goggles this is in turkey okay the link to this story takes you to the

deleting yeah we've got a little bad wrong you dump that back in the rundown but to be clear we're putting vr headsets on cows to increase lactation correct she leaking now i know this isn't circling dad but as somebody who this might be front of mind for like you think i should invest like in a google cardboard does that really work i don't know google cardboard it's a vr headset you know the nerds out there will know what i'm talking about um wait what are they watching in their headsets the cows they just imagine they're running free and they're still like in their stall yeah snow skiing like in the alps like what are they doing maybe maybe they're running free and they're still in their stall. Snow skiing in the Alps? What are they doing? Maybe they're honoring their ancestors with a successful simulated hunt.

That could be it. They're just watching Packers games over and over. Cows love to hunt. It's in their nature. They hunt grass. Yes. I put the story in there if you guys want to. Yeah, it's this week in milk, David.

Do you think you could fuck with them and just make them think they're actually jumping over a moon? Ooh. Because you can do a roller coaster, and it kind of gives you the spinnies a little bit. I don't want to be inhumane about this, but. What if you were skydiving inside those headsets and you put that on a cow? Would it just start panicking? Oh, jeez. What would happen?

Or what if you were Rocky rocky mountain climbing wow okay or what if you put a vr headset on a bull named fu manchu we're back to country songs got it how much does a good set of vr go for these days randy that didn't that didn't make affordable can we get one for the office? That wasn't even a verbal answer. It wasn't... He just scoffed at you. He gurgled back at you. It was weird. Dude, gurgle gang in the building. We already bought you a drone, Ray. All you need to do is look up a VR headset.

So for the poor boys like me, Google Cardboard was basically this thing by Google where they would send you a sheet of cardboard with like perforated angles and angles, and you just fold it together for, like, a dollar. So it was bendy? The cardboard was bendy. Yes. Drop your phone in, and it was, like, the equivalent of VR. It was a cheap knockoff. And you could get plastic ones for, like, $10.

But actual VR headsets are, like, $300. Don't ask what I watched on those, but it was a good experience. Was it anime? What if in the simulation you're working alongside a structural engineer named Ronald Hamburger and there's a building that's slowly falling over? Sir, get the... Put him through. It's Hamburger. He needs to talk to the president now. Put Hamburger through.

We need a blend of Armageddon with The Rock trying to save this tower, and he's got to throw a VR headset on. I just hope Ronnie knows what he's doing, man. Jesus Christ, that's Ron-O-Hamburger. Don't worry. If this falls, we will rebuild. Oh, man. What is the...

Never mind. This is a real breaking news headline for you, though, this cow thing. I thought you guys might get a kick out of the Turkish cow with VR goggles. If you look at the story, there's a photo of the cow with VR goggles. It's quite humorous. That is the best. That's what moved me the most. Did it tickle you?

No, that's not a cow pun. KJ keeps getting served this ad for chinos, and it's just like a six inch away crotch shot of some dude in these chinos what is going on i did venture out yesterday to try to uh re-up the wardrobe i may have done a little too much uh packing and left a lot of shit in storage so i was like shit i need to buy some clothes or unload shit out of storage and And now I'm just getting crotch shots all day. Well, I got something that can maybe help with that. There we go.

Oh, do tell. Cuts Clothing. Wow. Cuts Clothing. Try that again. Cuts Clothing. Big fan. You know, traditional business attire, the kind of stuff that maybe you grew up wearing

or maybe like grandpa, your dad was wearing, it's just not the norm anymore for a lot of people. It's in your grandpa's clothing. It's changed. The game has changed. The days of wearing uncomfortable office attire, those days are behind us. Thank God. Look at you. You're in here comfortable as fuck.

Suits and ties are a thing of the past past and i think we're all happy about that but what are we supposed to wear instead that's the problem steven borelli set out to solve when he started a company called dylan cuts clothing in 2016 steven set out to create clothes ready for every occasion the modern man faces he started by reinventing the t-shirt you're a big cuts guy we all are. But you, I feel like you come in here and you look the best in the cuts. What do you like the most about it? I was going to give that award to Randy.

Randy looks fine, but he doesn't have a mic. That's true. Because he had one, but he bought the wrong one because it was only $28, the whole thing. But thank you, Dave. Yes. Kind of, as a name would kind of imply, it's cut perfectly. It's like the length is perfect. It hugs my arms perfectly, my torso perfectly.

It's also just very comfortable. It kind of feels like it was made just for me, but I know it wasn't. Well, I've seen you wear it to work. I've seen you wear it to the gym. I've seen you wear it just going out on the town with the boys. You've worn it to the disco. I've seen you in the biblioteca wearing it, for that matter. It's amazing.

The signature, buttery soft, custom-engineered Pika Pro. Excuse me, a tri-blend tee. That's my personal favorite. It's a bold new take on a classic design. Combining the ultimate blend of high-quality cotton, polyester, and spandex, Dylan. GQ Magazine has called it the only shirt worth wearing. What do they know? I mean, GQ, they know a lot, is what I'm saying.

He's joking. Yes. With minimal design that's professional enough for the office, yet comfortable enough for a night out. Right. Cuts combines versatility with style, so you have the perfect look for every occasion. Cuts clothing is work leisure apparel for the sport of business.

Business is a sport. Get 15% off your first order by going to cutsclothing.com slash steam. That's cutsclothing.com slash steam for 15% off. The only shirt worth wearing. This next segment is called KJ Segment. What happens in this one? I don't know. I have no idea.

I told him, look, you got to beat Randy. Randy had a segment last week. People are still talking about. Bar's been set. What are you going to do? I sat next to Randy, asked him about said segment. He told me for two minutes what it was about. And then I was like, wait, which part of it was the segment?

So no offense to Randyandy but critics loved it so uh i produced some uh intro music but i'll spare everybody no i won't this is kj segment there we go what you okay you're not crying are you are you? Did you just sing your own intro? Live. Can I do that again? Nah, it's called in vivo. I've got three options for you. Welcome to KJ's segment.

Three segment options. A little choose your own adventure. I will not describe further beyond the titles of each option. And we'll save the other two. It's called packaging here in the biz. Option number one, either of you can choose or collectively decide. Oh, for sure. How'd you get those?

Option number two, how'd you get those scars? Or option number three, bring that beat back. Dylan, since you're on the mend, you were out all last week, I know you're champing at the bit. I'll let you go. It's one of the three. You just got to read one. I'm going to think about it for the next five minutes.

How'd you get those scars? Fair. How'd you get those scars? Without bear trapping myself, I know that David and I discuss his medical history, including, you know, a lot of GI involvement. But I don't know if either of you guys have had to, you know, go have surgery or any ER visits. I believe you've broken your neck or back or something of that sort at some point. No, no, no. He broke my neck.

Broke his neck, had his back blown out. Exactly. Two different things. By the review, had anything required stitches, any cuts, scar, anything that left significant scars? The only cuts I know about are the shirts I wear. The read's done. Fair. The read's done. We're doing a different thing now.

It's KJ's second. That's C-U-T-S. I've never had stitches. Okay. Fair. What about you? I've had stitches. I've had teeth chipped.

I've had a camera in my butt. How'd you do stitches? What led to the stitches, I guess, is my question. Jeez. One time I split my chin on the fireplace, the brick. Very common kid injury. This dude's so funny, he had us all in stitches. Okay.

Fair. It wasn't funny. Lost a lot of blood. Mom freaked out. What else, man? Let's just go through my entire med history. No, I just wanted to make sure if there was anything significant. I had a similar fall issue.

I missed my chin. I fractured my leg into a million pieces trying to hang on a basketball. Oh, yes. That is something that probably led to something. One million pieces. The doctor counted. The knee recovered well, we would say. It was his last resort.

That is true. Wrote my leg in two pieces. That's what I was going for. That was my last resort. Well, we're probably three weeks out or so from what's going to be the 10-year anniversary, I believe, of when I got the scars that are not as visible now across the bridge of my nose and through my left eyebrow.

As many do this part of the year, you try to go out and make, what do you call them, resolutions. You know, hey, this year I'm going to make more money. I'm going to work less, travel more, all those fun things. And a lot of people settle on maybe I'll lose a little weight. Or I'm going to eat more baked potatoes. Yeah, get back in on them.'s true that's true some people are like hey i want to just i need to post more tiktoks or ah tiktok like you know you just promise yourself these things

well i was probably four or five years post football college football and like working out every day in grind boy session and i was getting to the point where I was like, Hey, if we don't get this under control weight wise, you might lose the direction of where this physique is heading. So it's like, you know what? I drink a lot of beer. Let's nix the beer. This guy drinks beer. Big beer guy.

You know, I was out on beer. I was like, Hey, let's cut the alcohol back a little bit. Let's cut the sugar back. And, and, you know, that, that's our resolution. Fast forward a few weeks, get to super bowl you know whatever the weekend prior to that was sitting around with some friends playing a little uh drinking game if you will called king's cup i don't know if you've heard of it i pretty much invented king's cup kj well i appreciate it uh i would like to send you some medical bills uh and me being out on beer, decided to participate with Vodka.

Mixed with Diet Squirt. Whoa, whoa, time out. I was trying to cut the sugar, and that's what was available. You're not going to just sneak Diet Squirt in. It's a fact. They didn't have Sprite. It was just like whatever was available at the liquor store. You should never drink Diet Squirt.

You should always just go with the original Squirt. I know you were trying to limit the Shug but it's squirt it should have been a shug night i agree okay well it was real you did get run over all right i'm sorry it was a real i'm just telling you a story of how i got these scars it's a really chill night um 10 years ago and uh we're sitting around playing king's cup no more rowdy than we are right now a couple gentlemen and myself a couple rowdy gentlemen you're talking to them the original that's right what's up in between a couple games and we're probably a game or two in um i was just scrolling through my social

media i don't even know if i'd like on my phone, but earlier that day or something, I'd seen a photo of a friend named Chief is kind of what it goes by basically. I think his real name is Brett. Texas State alum, actually. He had had a Facebook profile photo of doing kind of a one-hand handstand into his pool. And I was like, oh, that's a badass profile photo. Real flex. You know, he had the physique. I'm like oh it's a badass profile photo real flex you know he had the physique i'm like it's a good look well i was at my buddy's on the third floor apartment and i don't

know why but at some point in time i was like hey jelsea chief's photo is pretty badass and i go out to the balcony to kind of recreate it i uh approach the balcony with both hands And kind of flipped myself upward Tried to put my feet to the ceiling of the balcony or whatever Yeah, yeah, I fell over the third story balcony railing Third story? Yes What? Factual

For a Facebook photo? I didn't try to have anybody do it as a Facebook photo I just had that in my head and I was like, oh, cool photo. I bet I could do that. You were inspired. Correct. You almost lost your life because of a guy. Young, dumb, and full of diet squirt.

This guy. Factual. And when I came to, somehow gravity works a little bit differently, both when you're inebriated and or twirl, you know, tumbling in like whatever motion I was. By the grace of whatever, I landed like a sack of potatoes on the railing of the second floor apartment. Don't know how, like my head facing in towards that apartment balcony, my feet outward. Don't know how, Like I flipped and fell. Landed across my hips,

banged my head like upside down on the railing of the balcony. Were your hips lying real quick? My lips, my lips, my hips were very faithful that day. Very thankfully. So when I came to, I'm looking up and my idiot buddy is like,

well, just reach up. I'll pull you back up here. In no effing world was that going to happen. I like kind of get my bearings and I'm like, all right, F this. I checked the door. Luckily, the second floor balcony door was open. Stumble through whoever's apartment that was. Open the door and like the EMTs are there with my buddies.

Like, hey, you know, you got to get in the ambulance. And I'm like, can't you just put me in back of your truck like i was not coherent they called the ambulance they called the ambulance um go to the hospital mris all that no internal bleeding thankfully uh and like seven stitches across the nose and like eight through the eyebrow and didn't break any bones so your boy was quite bendy that night man sheesh you don't seem like the reckless type to try such a thing i tried to tell people before that when sally said on sally said on a mail-in episode that she was a piece of shit when she was younger i felt nothing more true than those words dave also used to be a piece of shit. I'm not anymore.

So, yeah, that's my story of how I survived a fall off a third-story balcony. And the only stitches I've ever had to this day. There's KJ's segment. Wow. What would you have landed on if you had? Air conditioning units and probably landed on a casket. Who knows what the outcome would have been otherwise uh i've got somewhere my i was gonna queue it up but i couldn't find it my google photos like i went back to you know the scene um just to take a picture of

it because i hadn't been back to the apartment since like a year or two later just say okay what was down there there's some bushes and then like you can kind of see behind the bushes and it's like straight up, you know, just whatever big, a green electrical box slash AC units. Like it was not a soft landing. So it wouldn't have been like a trampoline and you wouldn't have like hilariously bounced back up.

There was, I was not going to be a bumble. There was no good outcome beyond the one that existed. And let's say that apartment door didn't open. Like, I don't know what the outcome would have been after that. Like, do I break this person's door? Thankfully they weren't home.

I'm sure they came home to like a trail of blood, most likely through their apartment. I have no idea. Cause I never went back to that scene, but yeah. Damn. The boy's here. What would, what would you have told us if Dylan had chosen bring that beat back?

Was that a Fred Durst story? Save that for another day. Okay. Yeah. The other two are both full segments as well, or full discussions as well. But yeah, the only other tie-in from that is while recovering is when I first started The Walking Dead. Wow. So it forever holds a special place in your heart.

It is actually the moment I've watched like three or four seasons. This man was literally bendy. Very much so. I tried to tell a client who's like orthopedic surgery practice, like, hey, sorry, I was in the hospital, missed our last call, blah, blah, blah. And I blamed him, like fixing my buddy's satellite dish, leaned out to watch the Super Bowl. That's how I knew it was that weekend. And she was like, oh, you must have been drunk. It's always the drunk ones don't break anything.

I'm like, oh, you know, I've had one. That's true. You do hear that because they don't like stiffen up. They always survive the crashes. They're flail boys, basically, and their bones tend to – also, bones are their money, Dave. Yeah. My buddy broke his arm falling off his roof on mushrooms.

That's sick. He was on mushrooms. His roof was not made of mushrooms. That would be cool. Well, we're glad you're still here with us, KJ. As am I. More severe, man. As am I.

Instead of you getting murdered by yourself, you're now murdering your thirst here with liquid death. It's not even an ad. Thirst had no chance. I'm alive. Thirst ain't. You were murdered by, were You're now murdering your thirst here with liquid death. It's not even an ad. Your thirst had no chance. I'm alive. Thirst ain't. You were murdered by,

were you on the gram? Was this going to go on the gram, this photo? What? I will find both the scene of the fall, and I'll find the photo of Brett that I tried to recreate and share it with the good people today. Where can we find you on social media, KJ?

That'd be at KJ Ellis with ones as the L's. Hey, you know what? I'll say it. This is a fun episode. Had a good time. I'm glad we're back. We are back, baby. God, daddy's back in the studio.

We're going to record Too Much Dip right after this, after I eat my homemade lunch, and these guys go to wherever KJ ordered from. And I want you guys to check out. If you're looking for something, maybe a different take on sports. I mean, no one's talking sports like we are. No, you don't see takes like this. We're just three guys just chopping it up.

Factually, we had more sports to talk about, like, as we were coming in here and just shooting the shit. So I think we're primed for that. Yeah. And we don't get anything wrong. It's a good time. Anyway, we will see you allall on wednesday we got a patreon tomorrow we're recording yeah brett will be back will won't be brett's back so brett will

be in here assuming brett assuming brett makes it back he's sending some texts i don't know how what kind of condition he's in right now but um he'll be back. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye.

Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye.

Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye.

Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye.

Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye.

Bye.