Circling Back - Suburban Tigers & Pre-Workout Panic

Episode Date: May 10, 2021

In the first episode of Podcast Week, we recap our Weekends in Fun, discuss the tiger roaming the streets of a Houston suburb, Elon's performance on SNL, and Brett's Breaking News. Dave is also back on his baked potato BS and Will tried pre-workout for the first time. Contribute to our campaign to benefit the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society: pages.lls.org/mwoy/ctx/austin21/wmedia Support us on Patreon and receive weekly episodes for as low $5 per month: www.patreon.com/circlingbackpodcast Watch all of our full episodes on YouTube: www.youtube.com/washedmedia Shop Washed Merch: www.washedmedia.shop (0:00) Fun & Easy Banter (8:55) Recapping This Weekend in Fun (32:35) Houston Suburbs Tiger Incident (54:03) Elon on SNL (1:04:43) Brett’s Breaking News Support This Episode’s Sponsors Ritual: www.ritual.com/circlingback (10% off first three months) Taft: www.taftclothing.com (CB10 for 10% off) Vizzy: www.vizzyhardseltzer.com/washed --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/circling-back/message Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

All right, we're back circling back podcast presented by busy hard seltzer. The only hard seltzer with vitamin C and superfruit acerola. My name is Will DeFreeze. To my right, David. Rough. Boys are feeling a little choogy today. Dude, are we on our choog shit right now? Okay, I have no idea what that means.

Can someone please explain? That's a very choogy thing of you to say, dude. Explain like I'm 37. You don't know what choogy means? No. I've seen it used a lot, including in some of our text. Chugi was a popular hip-hop artist. That's Chugi. Right there, right there.

No, what is Chugi for real? Before I derail this thing. It's another way to describe aesthetics slash people slash experiences that are basic. It was coined by a now 23-year-old woman in 2013 while a student at Beverly Hills High School. Wow, that's a flex. On whom the irony is apparently lost. That's not a very good explanation of it. I found a chart.

It says awareness of personal style. If you are in denial, this isn't helpful at all. Basically, you're self-aware, but you're out of date. You're choogy. I hate it. Our entire podcast is choogy i hate it our entire podcast is choogy yeah honestly that's fair but dylan you'll want to you'll want to hear this dylan if you're neutral uh on your awareness of personal style and you're also outdated you're fratty

that didn't it didn't say that i swear to god and if you're in denial you're basic this is a chart that looks like it was written on a legal pad. What if you're out of style but you're self-aware? That make you fratty? Or what? No, that's if you're neutral to it, which isn't really helpful. Neutral. I'm neutral.

Yeah, you're fratty. Yeah. You're the frattiest guy. Well, yeah. You're fratty. You're the king of frat. Well, I don't know if that's accurate. Hey, we should probably get ahead of this.

If y'all hear a bunch of claps on the podcast today, it's not like we have a live studio audience or anything. It's just that we got Helen Nats in the studio today. It's very Natty in here. What's going on? Brett. Dude, that's so Brett. That is Brett. That's so Brett.

Is Brett doing work in there? No. No, but really, why are there Nats flying around? I changed the trash when I got in. Hard to say. Did someone leave a window open? Getting some fresh air? I don't know when I got in. Hard to say. Did someone leave a window open? Get some fresh air? I don't know if these windows open.

Randy, are you living in the studio and just opening the windows? He nods yes. Very cool. That's big. Very cool. Dude, I haven't done a Monday episode in like three weeks. We out here. That's crazy.

I know, dude. I got a case in the Mondays. Mondays are different. They're different. Right, Dave? I got a case on the Mondays. Mondays are different. They're different. Right, Dave? The first day of the week, work week. There are so many Nats. I just saw two buzz my tower.

We're in the Natty Championship right now. Oh, got him. All right, we can't do this the entire time. Nah, I won't do it again. I lived in a place in college where we had a fly problem. The compound, Dylan. Well, probably a lot of other problems. There were.

No, but we had to do the strip of fly paper and it was so revolting. Ugh. Just bugs stuck to it. It's weird. I actually made some paper fly in the club this weekend. You made it rain.

Mm-hmm. Did you really? Yeah. Wow. Fritz and I went to Rio. You took your infant son to Rio. I got one of those air tubes that goes around his neck, and then I put him in the pool, and he was just floating there, just vibing.

Did you get bottle service? Just head out of the water? Yeah, he got bottle service from my diaper bag, dog. Oh, that's crazy. Damn, dude. Yeah, you know what it is. I didn't know y'all had it like that. That's crazy.

It'd be like that sometimes, for sure. Yeah, for sure. It's just got Cheugy here. It does like that. That's crazy. It'd be like that sometimes, for sure. Yeah, for sure. It's just got choogy here. It is not choogy at all. It's got hella choogy in here. We got Dylan Shiver in the building. Do you have hungover voice today, or you got normal voice today? No, this is normal voice.

Normal voice Dylan. Did you guys see that our former president called a horse a junkie? Yeah. Yesterday? Yeah, I don't know if that horse was intentionally shooting up. I don't think the horse is a junkie. I don't think that's fair. It was just an anti-inflammatory, right?

So it was just like Tylenol? I believe there was a steroid element to it. We'll probably talk about this more on Too Much Dip, a sports podcast that we do here. You're the one who brought it up. Yeah, you did bring it up. You brought it up. It's not like I brought it yeah yeah i have to do my best to not like bring up sports stuff once in a while because i don't want to tread you know don't tread on too much you guys should make a shirt it's like with a snake you guys should make a dippy shirt that

has him on there it says don't tread on dippy that's my snake tread on me That's my snake Don't tread on me All Dave's animals Not here His animals are so sassy Yeah All of them Cheugy and loving it

Cheugy and loving it Oh boy We're gonna ruin Cheugy I feel like we're late to this We are late to Cheugy Cheugy was one of those things That came out like Wednesday afternoon on the TL. I hate Chugi.

I don't like how it's spelled. Yeah. C-H-E-U-G-Y. Mm-mm. Mm-mm. It's just weird. Anyway, do you guys have a good weekend? We're probably going to do a second on that.

Yeah, we'll probably get to that at some point, dude. Like, yeah, anything else you want to just – Hey, you see that tiger that's rolling around Houston? Dude, that was crazy. Dude, let's talk about that real quick. Roar! All right, man, anything else you want to just direct? Hey, you see that tiger that's rolling around Houston? Dude, let's talk about that real quick. Roar! All right, man, do your thing. Maybe he just wanted some frosted flakes.

You ever think about that? You guys want me to do some programming notes to get it out of the way and get into the meat of this episode? The tiger didn't want frosted flakes. You can't say that for sure. That's a good point from Dylan. It looked like he just wanted to live anywhere other than, like, suburbia. Yes.

Yeah, and a three-by-two in suburban Houston. Nice area, I'm sure. West Houston, cool. Very cool. Yeah. But no place for a tiger. No country for old tigers. Young tigers, too.

Sorry, what were you saying? The next few weeks and for the past, like, month or so, we've been partnering with LLS, the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society. We've all been affected by cancer in some way, shape, or form. We're campaigning to raise money in the Man and Woman, or in our case, Team of the Year campaign. LLS does more to advance science and support patients than any other cancer organization. They're the largest nonprofit dedicated to creating a world without blood cancers. organization. They're the largest non-profit dedicated to creating a world without blood cancers. Since 1949, they've invested nearly

$1.3 billion in groundbreaking research, pioneering many of today's most innovative approaches. We have a link in the bio of these episodes, so you can go donate, or you can hop over to watchmedia.com. Brett did a nice little write-up that you should definitely read. Check it out. And donate some money if you can.

You can take anything. Also, go follow Circling Back Pond and Watch Media on the Grom. Add me on the group. Add me on the group. That's two because we have two accounts that we're promoting right now. Real quick, let me sneak something in here. I'll sneak it. Okay.

I wrote a little column on our Patreon page. It is called the Backer Insider. And it basically just gives you a sneak. Is this like an erotic novel or something? Yeah. Y'all try to make this dirty, and it's not. You're the one who named it. If you ain't dirty, you ain't here to party.

It's not Back Insider. It's Backer Insider. Do you get it? Like a circling back supporter. Anyway, go check it out on Patreon. It basically gives you a look behind the curtain at Washed Media. Somehow getting dirtier. Some of you folks are interested in that kind of stuff.

And if you are, go check it out. Patreon.com slash circlingbackpodcast. Dave. Yeah, I'm familiar with it. Well, you can continue. We're also doing Worst Of on Patreon tomorrow. Go submit your stories. Worst Of at WatchMedia.com or head over to WatchMedia.com and fill out the form.

And we're doing voicemails on Friday. Or actually, Thursday. We've been releasing them on Thursdays. I think this might be a regular thing. Yeah. Thursday voicemails hit different. They're a little diffy. Yeah. It's the same as Friday, but it happens on Thursday.

You can listen on Friday morning if you want to. That's the thing about it, man. I recommend listening on Thursday and then giving it another run on Friday to see how it hits. If it's the same. You can do that. Right. You have the option, really, of what we're trying to say yeah and we

don't get anything we don't have any benefits from that like we don't get double stream points you can even listen to it on a saturday really if you think about it uh i wouldn't recommend it not if we have a lady on the pod though yeah true it's tough yeah not on saturday hop over to youtube.com slash wash media mash that subscribe button maybe even like some things while you're there right randy yep he gives me a thumbs up. And also, watchmedia.shop. Go check out the merch. We did a nice little promotion for all the mommies out there.

Happy belated Mother's Day to all the mommies out there. We love the mommies. Big fan of mommies. Dude, the daddies are not happy, though. Luckily, we got something in the pipeline for them. Okay, because they were asking. The daddies were like, hey, well, where's, you know. What's the deal?

Where's our promo? But yeah, go check it out. Is it time to recap this weekend in fun? Presented by Ritual? Let's go. Wow. Let's go. Dude, major shouts to Ritual.

Love Ritual. It's the multivitamin company that you know and trust. I trust them. Do y'all do what I do? And it's just, you pop the top on that little container and you just stuff your nose in there and get a big whiff of that minty smell. What we know about Ritual is that Ritual smells good.

But have you seen their protein powder? Yeah, I've tried it. A lot of time they can feel intimidating. It's that whole no pain, no gain thing. And their formulas are opaque because they're not just powder, guys. But the truth is, deep down, as in cellular level deep, that's difficult to say. That's pretty deep. Cellular level deep.

We all need protein. It's about more than just muscles. So the team of scientists over there, hello, Harvard. That's a flex. Oh, wow. Hello. They reimagined protein from the ground up and the inside out, from how it's made to who it's for and why it's needed.

And the result is a delicious plant-based protein offered in three premium formulations for distinct life stages and unique nutrient needs, all made at the same high standards and approach and commitment to traceability that Ritual is known for. And I have to say, the little Ritual protein shaker bottle that we got, I think it's tight. It is pretty tight. It's quickly got atop my list of the best shakers that I have.

I'm a big fan of movers and shakers. This one's the top dog right now. Love how Ritual just took a step and went into the science factory and came out with some protein. Like here we are now with protein, and it's very good. Easy to mix. Drop it in my Vitamix. It's not the Flex, but that's what I use.

Wow. Okay. That was a little unnecessary. It was. It was. Here's what we know about them. They're made traceable, so you deserve to know what you're putting in your body and why. They're one-of-a-kind visible supply chain.

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Okay. Yeah, I get it. I'm older. They also have a thoughtful, purpose-built formulation, clean plant-based formula specifically created to support nutrient needs. They got 20 grams of pea protein, P-E-A protein plus a complete amino acid profile made of the essential choline? Like, I don't even know how to say it. They're so transparent here that I don't even know how to say some of the things that they have in it.

You did it. Choline. Dude, you crushed that. You were going to say choline. It also tastes good, which is important. So why not shake up your ritual to make trying something new less scary? Ritual offers a money-back guarantee if you're not 100% in love. Plus, our listeners get 10% off during your first three months.

Just visit ritual.com slash circling back to add the essential protein today. That's ritual.com slash circling back. Dylan, what did you do this weekend? Wow, thank you for asking me, Will. I kind of had a fantastic weekend. Oh, cool, dude. I kind of had a fantastic weekend. Oh, cool, dude. Kind of had a fantastic weekend. I, uh, Friday,

I, uh, went out to dinner and went out to a bar after dinner with my new friends, plus bae, of course. Wow. More on that later. What? What?

What about it? Ring it up now, bitch. I think we might have some mutual friends now. Woo! Really? Is Dave going to cuck your new friends? Let's just say there was a side text.

Wow. I think Dave's about to steal your friends. I'm very intrigued. This is going to be exciting. Saturday, pretty low-key day. Parks and Brittany's daughter were hanging out. We took them to a little park action. That was a lot of fun.

You took Parks to the park. I took Parks to the park. It was kind of wild. Yeah. Do we have a microphone, dude? How did that just happen? I'm going to record from up here. Wow.

You could leave it there and still sound better than Dylan. Yeah. People are clamoring for Dylan to swallow the mic, but he's not doing that. And then Sunday was a huge day. Of course, it was Mother's Day, and I introduced my mother, shouts to Rosemary, we love you, to Bay and Bay's daughter. And it was fantastic, a great day. Went out to the ranch and had a great day out there.

Saw some horses, had some lunch. Did any of them try to stomp you out? I had that thought. No horses try to stomp me out with their hooves. You had such a good Sunday that you decided to bring Bay to work with you, I noticed. I did. Yeah, I brought some pizza in. I was like, okay.

Yeah, we got it. I guess it's bring Bay to work day. We didn't know. We got some pizza over the weekend, and I brought some in today. I didn't know I would have brought that queso in. Dude, that's too much Bay in one place. Nah, you can't. That's too much.

You can't. And that's really it. You can't portion too much Bay into one place. It was a you can't. That's too much. You can't. And that's really it. You can't push too much bae into one place. It was a really great weekend. You tied it together, Will. I did. I'm flying high because I had such a great weekend. So there it is.

Didn't you say you got hella lifted last night? You might have some residual this morning. I didn't get lifted last night. Oh, he left something very crucial out, Will. Oh, a dub? We caught a dub in Warzone. We caught a dub. Now it's mine.

I got to say it. I just, I'm just. Shut up, Will. Oh, a dub? We caught a dub in Warzone. Now it's mine. I got to say it. Shut up, Will. I still think there's a group text out there that's just excluding me. Well, yeah. It's about Warzone. No, I think other stuff bleeds into that group text. This one is on point. It does not deviate.

I just don't trust y'all. I want to be in there. We talk about Nick Merckx and how much we suck at Warzone. It's like when you can't go out because maybe you have a kid at home and you're like, yeah, I'm not going to go to a bar tonight. But you want the invite just in case. Speaking of going out and having kids, can we do something at some point? I want y'all to hang out with Bay.

Like, please? Yeah, just invite. I kind of had a kid recently, so I kind of derailed my social life, Dylan. Let's find an activity where we can all go and bring kids and have like a little quick little. Yeah, Will wants to bring his two-week-old. A quick little outing somewhere. I'm not saying we're going to go. He only goes to Rio at this point.

I'm not saying we're going to take Fritz to Schlitterbahn. I'm just saying let's go meet up for a little bit. That would be sick. You know what I mean? Just put him on like a little tube. My tube. My tube. My tube. He could go on the Der Stuka. Anyway, tell us about your dumbass weekend.

I don't even think you'd like hanging out with Fritz at this point. He's not that much fun yet for you. Fritz is tight. He doesn't even talk to you. Fritz likes me. Well, there is one thing you're missing out on in that Verdansk group chat. Dylan's always sending live leak videos. Really? He's big into those things. Come on, dude. He added that on his bookmark bar at Grand X.

He's like, dude, my dad just posted this meme on Facebook. No, he's kidding. That's me. My dad's not a meme guy, luckily. Yeah, I didn't do much. I'm glad LiveLeak got the axe. We know that for sure. I saw a headline about it.

Yeah, I didn't really dig into it. Was it real or fake? Real or fake live league video ideas. That's not a bad segment. That's not bad. It could get a little dark. I have a real or fake segment that I'm workshopping, and when it gets released to the people, possibly Wednesday,

I think it's going to do some numbs. I abbreviated it. I abbreviated it numbies. Wow. So my weekend ended, as we just mentioned. Caught a dove in Dubzee. Before that, Friday night, stayed home. Saturday, though, was the day.

Took Randy to the park. He's scared of kites. Didn't know that. We're over it now. We had to work through it. Which I put myself in his little pause. And I was thinking, like, if I saw this thing up in the air and it was making a noise because, you know, the wind was hitting it and it was flapping, that would scare me if I was a dog. Is that a predator?

I don't know. I made the mistake one time of bringing Rosie to Zilker Park during a kite festival. And I didn't realize how much of an issue that would be. And she likes to chase light and shadows a lot. And it created a problem. And we had to leave immediately. Was she scared or was she trying to go after these kites? A little of both, I think.

See, Randy's just such a big baby. Randy was just like whimpering. He was very sad. Is he da baby? No, he's not da baby. Oh. Like Glenn Davis? He's big baby boy.

Okay. I pretty much just drank Vizzy and watched combat sports all of Saturday with a little golf sprinkled in there. So big, big combat sports weekend for Dave. Didn't really get out much. Nobody called me and invited me anywhere. Wow. Maybe your phone's

not working have you thought about going to the apple store well it is so so our mutual friends were texting me well one of them and he was oh yeah what's this i'm not supposed to out him but he or she was like this person was just like hey i think your boy's up here just the dude you work with get your boy i was like oh yeah yeah i do know him. Where was he? Was Dylan getting a little too fast and loose with the squad? And they were like, dude, this guy keeps ordering shots, like well tequila shots for the table. I'm like, okay, it doesn't really sound like Dylan. It wasn't me.

That wasn't Dylan. Okay. More on that later. I can get shots for anybody. Okay. What's going on here? Who are you talking about? What kind of shots does Dylan order if he's ordering a round of shots these days? Cuervo.

He's choogy. Cuervo's the choogiest tequila. I didn't buy anybody a shot over the weekend. It's got it, right? I don't know. Not one person did I buy a shot for. Not one. Okay. They said something about a chest luge.

Stop. Was J-Bone there? Was it J-Bone? It was not J-Bone. Something tells me J-Bone's not in your new friend group. Nah, he wouldn't be allowed in. J-Bone only shops for clothes on eBay now, per J-Bone. Yes. Yes.

He made a good point on Twitter saying that, yeah, you can do the, what is it, academy sports going out of business sales only for so long until they actually go out of business. And so then you have to pivot. That's a very valid point. My timeline is basically J-Bone videos now between Ross and Jared and like RBP's actual feed. So I'm getting J-Bone every time I open social media.

J-Bone overload. It's a lot. And, you know, me as a J-Bone fan, I'm happy about it. Yeah, J-Bone, he tried to – I think he was trying to create some controversy with me on the TL the other day by saying that he was going to swagger jack my new dad shoes. And all I did was the handshake emoji so that J-Bone couldn't somehow roast me even further.

I was like, no, I'm not going to feed into J-Bone trying to roast me right now. You basically ended the conversation. Yeah, I didn't because I was like, I could see J-Bone running with this and making me hate these shoes. So I'm not going to do that. And I'm just going to shake hands with him and say, cool. If J-Bone cops an article of clothing that you own, you got to start questioning it. No, now that J-Bone's working with Ross, J-Bone's going to try to trend

in the cool category. He just announced that he's shopping exclusively from eBay. Okay, but he's sprinkling in some cool newbies. I'm surprised he's not flipping these things. That's a J-Bone move. I can't believe he... If he actually wears them, I'll be shocked. I think he's going to end up... You might flip them and then buy an altcoin.

And then tell me and Dylan about it. You get some cummies. That's a group text that you might want to get in. Me, you, and J-Bone? Oh, yeah. We are. We do talk crypto. It's exclusively meme stock and crypto.

We talk crypto. Oh, yeah. And it's honestly once a month. J-Bone knows a lot more than Dave and I do, which is funny. How many other group texts you guys in? Do you want in on the one with Dylan or me and person to be named later? Yeah. Okay.

I do. Our mutual friend. Who is this person that's lying about my shot purchasing? You guys want to hear what I did this weekend? Not really. I hung out with the Battletoad Bad Boy on Thursday and Friday. Thursday was for the boys.

Micah came over. We were supposed to go out to dinner together, but I was like, you know what? This isn't the move. You just need to come over here. I went and bought Mexican martini supplies, and we just went the fuck off. I felt pretty bad about myself on Friday morning. Did you pick them up from Matt's? No, no.

I just went and bought actual supplies from the store, and we just made our own Mexican martinis. I have to say, Micah knows how to make a Mexican martini better than any I've ever had. Seriously? It was incredible. He said it's really easy to do, and I'm like, Micah, I don't care how easy it is. Why? He killed it. Because half the time at Matt's when you order a Mexican martini,

they don't actually give you one. They give you just their regular margarita mix in the martini container. This is correct, David. This is correct. No, no, no. I think they do. They're no. I think they do. They're different. I think they do.

What does he put in it? Just what you put in it. I don't know what that is. It's essentially just a regular martini with a little tiny hit of, you know, the olive juice. Oh, really? Action. It's nothing crazy. Action.

Happy holidays. I also have an announcement. I did something this weekend that I've never done before. Announcement alert. And I don't know if I'm going to do it again. I took pre-workout for the first time. Really? It was Warhead pre-workout.

Oh my God, what are you doing? I got it from my sister-in-law, Shots to Emily, who had the plug. And unfortunately, I'm not a fan of it. Did it make you doo-doo? No. Did it make you flush? It just gave me a panic attack. I was freaking out. Did your ears itch? It just kind of gave me a panic attack. Like, I was freaking out.

Did your ears itch? No, but my entire face was tingling. Yeah, that's the something lean, one of the amino acids or something. I can't feel my face when I'm Pelotoning, and I hate it. Was your Peli different, though? That's a good question. The Peli, I felt like I put in minimal effort on the Peloton, but my numbers were still fine. And so I was like, oh, okay, this stuff might work, but I think I just need to scale back on how much

warhead pre-workout I'm doing. It makes you feel like your insides are just deteriorating. It was just, I took a little bit a couple of days before and it was fine, but I didn't really notice any uptick. And so I went a little harder and I, it turns out doing that was not the move. Yeah. They recommend that you, you slowly, like you limp into it. It starts with a low dose and then you increase how much you can handle. Unfortunately, on that Peloton ride where I was tweaking out, I decided to try to lean back and grab the PlayStation controller behind me so I could toss on a soccer game. And I tweaked part of my back. And so I kind of, I'm on the, I'm listed as day-to-day right now.

So when you got injured trying to get the PlayStation controller whilst working out? Yeah, while Pelotoning because I wanted to see the soccer game. And then when I actually got the soccer game up, the Wi-Fi was not strong enough in that room. And there was an error on the game. And so it was all for naught. You crushed that. Yeah, it was a really good situation. You crushed it. And I've been putting CBD balm on my back for the last three days.

Yeah, you showed me a photo. That stuff works. I sent it to Dave. Shouts to Theragun. We're in another group text. Sunday Scaries. Because I just sent it to Dave because I know he's a topical guy. Fucked up, dude.

Are you a topical guy? You never topicaled. I can be. You said you never. I'm a tropical guy. That's fair. Should we make tropical topicals for Wilmont? Should we expand into some topicals?

I think we should. It's not bad. What, we wear monocles? Oh, that works. You're doing too much. You just ruined it. I think he's doing just enough. You just ruined it.

I thought the thing that you were going to say you did this weekend that you've never done before was, oh, I don't know, maybe ratio our good friend shitto on twitter just to holy hell i didn't mean to ratio him last night but the ratio occurred and i i thought it was a good tweet and i was it is a good tweet it's too good unfortunately yeah i didn't mean to ratio and i'm really sorry to shitto out there like he retweeted it so he was okay with it that's all you can do at that point though after i sent the tweet, I did that thing where I refreshed my notifications until he retweeted it, just to make sure that everything was okay. I thought about hitting him

on the text and being like, hey, if I tried it too hard, let me know. I don't want to piss off shit, though. He adopted a dog. Like a good guy. Dude, I also did something else this weekend. You guys ready for this? Uh-oh. Dude, I copped some new chairs for my patio. What? They call me Little Patio.

Are they wicker? I took that from DeChant. No, they're butterfly chairs. You ever heard of that? They're made out of bamboo. They're collapsible. And they have a nice little fabric chill-ass seat that I've been doing. Dude, how do they feel, man?

They feel good. Yeah? It feels nice to have a drink outside. Your place is pretty chill, man. I'm trying to make it. I need to check it out. Still waiting on that invite. You haven't been to his place yet?

Aren't you on a meal train with us or anything? Come over, dog. We are,. I'm trying to make it. I need to check it out. Still waiting on that invite. You haven't been to his place yet? Aren't you on like a meal train with us or anything? Like, come over, dog. We are, but I think we're like next week. Your meal train's quite extensive. Yeah, why do we have such an extensive meal train? Dude, I've used a steam shower before. Yeah, Dylan has steamed in my shower. I can tell you this.

There's a good chance I'll never use your shower. Why? It's all redone. I just don't see a scenario. Do you want to take a steam shower with me next time we're there? What's your problem, dude? I like steam shower with the boys when they come over. Is there enough room?

I steam with my buddy. Back in Michigan, I used to steam shower with my buddy Max all the time. We'd just chill in there in our bathing suits. Remember we had a segment called The Steam Room and then TNT jacked it for Charles Barkley and Ernie's podcast? Yeah, what the fuck? We're not pursued any kind of legal action. What about HBO?

HBO took the Touch Base podcast or something, and they literally used the exact same font that we used to use for the Touching Base. Listen, dude, it sucks. It's not good. Why does everybody just want to be just like us? They don't have a hard seltzer presenting sponsor. Wow.

Last I checked. Imagine. You've got to think the HBO money that's funding it, though, is pretty good. Couldn't be us. Whatever. It's all liquid. Ooh, he did it.

Death? I don't know. That's all I did this weekend. I'm happy for you and your new chairs, man. That sounds super dope. Thank you. Yeah. If you want to come over and sit in one and have maybe a Mexican martini with Micah and I.

I do. So shout out to all the moms out there, the mommies. Yesterday was Mother's Day. I did something last night, pretty interesting. So we grilled steaks, did some corn on the cob. Also, we did baked potatoes.

Wow, you're back on your bullshit. Dude, I am back on my BS. Wow. Yeah, yeah. Pretty crazy, man. So I am back in on the baked potato. You bought the dip. Yep.

Wait, did you go out on i did i've been in and out often but now i'm back on it wow i did not expect that dave let me be the first to congratulate you on being back on your baked potato bs i took a little bp last night baked potato sliced it open did the i'm more a slice, like about three inch incision, and then just squish together. Kind of get a little bit of the potato innards up, and then mix in the butter, the sour cream, and the cheese. Don't do potato innards. Yeah, I don't know if we have to do innards. Don't do innards.

I do the long way slice, and then I do two little tiny slices, and then I do the squish up. You know what I used to do, and I hate it now, is this the full slice and just fold it. No. That's such a trash way to eat, and I hate it now, is this the full slice and just fold it. No. That's such a trash way to eat a potato. It really is, isn't it? Could you imagine eating your baked potato like that? Well, I will, will, will, will, will. More on that later.

Somebody at this table who might have been at a dinner with a mutual friend of mine and this person might eat their potato like that. Are you serious? Yeah. I think I know who you're talking about. What's going on with this mutual friend? I'm going to fight your mutual friend. Who is it? Well, it's your friend, so it'd be weird to fight your own friend.

Yeah, why would you fight your friend? Why would you be making all this up? I don't know. Did you send a steak back this weekend? No. I didn't eat a steak. No. What are you talking about?

Are you sending steak back? I didn't eat a baked potato either. Your friends have changed you. Did you order a steak medium plus, and they sent it out medium, Are you sending steak back? I didn't eat a baked potato either. Your friends have changed you. Did you order a steak medium plus and they sent it out medium and you sent it back? I heard you put your thumb in front of the waiter and you said, take this shit back. I did, and I put my thumb in my neighbor's steak as well. Dude, his is perfect over here. Will, you're going to be in Chicago next weekend.

Are you thinking about hitting up Hunter? Dude, I can't wait to hit up Hunter. I'm going to see if he wants to stay in my hotel room with me since I have two beds and one person in the room. I still can't believe that he's a real person.

He was the, he's a movie character. He was perfect. He was. For those that don't know what we're talking about, when we did a Chicago meetup for Touching Base,

we saw one of the most shockingly frat humans I've ever seen in my entire life. Just, just one of the least self-aware, over-the-top, just a guy that you're like, dude, it looked like he was on a bachelor party where he didn't know a lot of people and he was just overcompensating by showing people nudes on his phone.

Yes, I was going to say, people forget that part of that was he pulled nudes on his phone and he was showing the table said nudes before putting his thumb in his buddy's steak. Inside of a restaurant. It's like there's other people at this restaurant like us. He was pushing on his steak, and he was thumping it. No one thumps steak. Before even cutting into it, he told the waiter, like, this isn't cooked right. Before even cutting into it.

Call me Lil Thumb. You don't see that. Who thumps a steak like that? He talked down to that waiter or waitress. I can't remember. Very, very aggressively. This dude is a psychopath. He was the most entertaining part of that entire dinner.

We got him on his word. That bachelor party or whatever it was hated him. Yeah. And rightfully so. There's a reason that he was at the end of the table and not in one of the middle seats. The guys who got stuck down at that end with like the random friend from high school

which was Hunter. From boarding school. They were sending texts under the table like, dude, why did you sit me here? I don't know this dude. This dude just showed me like just a random chick on his phone. He definitely blacked out at the bar later and like fell asleep and shit himself or something and then like woke up the next day and just took

a private jet out he's like dad i fucked up last night can you just send me home fuck yeah hunter can y'all believe that not only is it podcast week by the way happy podcast week is that confirmed randy but it's also the up. It's also Ben Affleck week. Wow. On brunch. Yeah. Shouts to brunch. I didn't think we'd ever see it, honestly.

No. People were not expecting both of those to coincide that way, but wow. Shouts to brunch, though. Major shouts to brunch, always. Let's hear from our friends at Taft. Taft, if you're not familiar with it, is a direct-to-consumer men's footwear brand specializing in unique, bold boot and shoe designs. These things are unique, boys.

We've seen them before. I got some Chelsea boots sitting at home that are Taft, and now your boy's got some loafers. They design with boldness in mind to ensure all of their products are as unique and stylish as their customers, and you'll not find these anywhere else. In every single detail, the shoes and boots are considered. From the laces to the eyelets, they take the extra steps to ensure that the end product is perfect. I've got bad news for you, Will. We got the same pair of shoes. That's fine.

I want the squad to roll deep. All right. You're not J-Bone. We are allowed to have the same shoes. I just want to make sure you know about it. I got different ones. Mine are much more swag than y'all's. No offense.

All these are swag because they're all handcrafted in Europe. They searched the globe looking for the right factories, and they found the very best in Spain. Hispania. Hispania. Ever heard of it, Dave? Probably not. Familiar.

Heard of Spain. Yeah. That's good. That's good. Each one is handcrafted by generational shoemakers, probably of generational wealth, and artists in their own right. Each product is hand-painted, hand-cut, and hand-stitched, and this allows only the best parts of the leather to be used.

It's the highest quality. Their products are built to last. They source the highest quality materials in the world to make the best shoes and boots that they can, and all their leathers are full grain. Can you imagine not having full grain, just having like a partial grain? A grip grain. Please.

So they're not only comfortable, they're durable too. They get better with age they're like a fine wine but you put them on your feet instead of drinking their wine it's your wine for your feet it's bay for your feet bay for your feet their shoes and their boots are featured they feature blake stitch construction which dylan probably didn't know what that was even before this for longevity and added flexibility and their soles are made from stacked leather with rubber injections for traction. Stack paper, stack leather.

I always say that. You do. I always say that. You are always saying something similar. Yeah, it's crazy, man. I love stacking leather. Again, go visit TaftClothing.com and use code CB10 for 10% off your order of any full-price boot, shoe, or sneaker purchase. Again, that is TaftClothing.com.

Use code CB10 for 10% off your order of any full-price boot, shoe, or sneaker purchase. Let's get to the story that we've been tagged in. A thousand times. If you go to our mentions right now on Twitter, you're not going to see much besides just this story. And this is because a tiger was roaming a neighborhood in Houston. I think we have a lot of listeners in Houston. Roar! When I saw this headline, I was thinking, oh, someone

just misidentified some kind of wild cat that wandered into the neighborhood. But no, it's a tiger. It's an actual tiger. I was on my Nextdoor app the other day, and somebody was like, can someone identify this cat, please? And they were worried that it was some type of crazy cat. And someone just responded, yeah, that's a house cat.

You looked at the photo. It's like, yeah, that's definitely just a house cat, buddy. Yeah, it's just a cat. Chill out. Yeah. It's whiskers. But some guy named Rob Wormald. Terrible last name.

It's a trash last name. Dude, it's not a good last name. Come on. What an idiot. Wormald. You can't even pronounce Dylan's last name. It's a trash last name. It's not a good last name. What an idiot. Wormald. You can't even pronounce Dylan's last name. Wormald. It's Chevery.

He's got Worm in his name. Okay. Worm. What's the Worm doing tonight? This guy probably listens. Dude, his friends call him Big Worm for sure. That's a dope nickname. That is a dope nickname.

Earthworm Jim. Nah, dude. Earthworm Rob. Earthworm Jim was a really fun Sega game. It was. It was good. As a guy who was anti-Sega growing up. Dude, Sega stunk.

No, it didn't. They had no... There were some fun games on it. Oh, Sonic the Hedgehog. Echo the Dolphin. Sonic. And that's it. Earthworm Jim.

Earthworm Jim. Aladdin was tight on it, but it wasn't as good as the Super Nintendo version. Oh, and Mortal Kombat Kombat they had the blood code they had the blood first and if you had a blood thirst like me then you wanted to play the real one

what was the Primal Rage yeah what was the Primal Rage Primal Rage was sick Primal Rage it was sweet I remember Primal Rage that was the game when you walked into the movie theater

and you walked by the arcade you always heard the dinosaurs yelling at each other it was sweet Primal Rage was awesome. Sega. Sega.

No, that's Raycon. Should we talk about this tiger? Right. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Again. So, this looks like a very run-of-the-mill, high-end, suburb neighborhood in Houston. And there's just a tiger roaming it. I don't really understand how this tiger got there,

but I assume it's living in the person's house who's saying, please don't shoot my tiger. Right. Apparently the guy has an exotic pet license, but I don't know if that means you can have them in your generic neighborhood. Not that it's not a nice neighborhood. It is, but this is just a regular Houston neighborhood, and that looks like a young tiger.

That looks like a one-year-old tiger. But it's – Are you well-versed in knowing the age of tigers just looking at them? That's a little thing. I'm surprised you don't know that about me. When I saw that this tiger was roaming Houston streets, I was like, oh, man, I hope he's okay. Get it? Houston street?

Oh, you thought he was going to go in there? Do you get it? Paint the corners? Nasty slider, man. Nasty. Yeah, this is a – imagine looking out your front living room window. Like, what's all the commotion about? And there's a Bengal tiger just chilling in your neighbor's yard.

Well, it looks like a beautiful night in a Houston suburb. And it looks like, you know, it's the sun's getting, it's going down a little bit. And, you know, you're probably having a nice little pop on the porch. It's probably a little soupy. Maybe sitting in your butterfly chair that you just ordered from Home Depot. Giving out butterfly kisses. Ooh, yeah. To Bay. I like Eskimo kisses a Depot. Giving out butterfly kisses. Ooh, yeah. To Bae.

I like Eskimo kisses a lot. Bae loves butterfly kisses, yeah. Okay, chill. Dude, the way a tiger walks is so swag. I feel, okay, so what is it? When I first saw this video, I saw the guy pointing the gun at him, and I thought it might have been the owner, and he was holding a tranq gun or something.

Then I realized, no, this is just a handgun that he's ready just to light this tiger up. Yeah. I gotta say, great restraint shown by this guy. I don't know if this guy's like an off-duty cop. I'm actually looking at a different picture of the guy with the pistol and he has a badge hanging from his belt. He is some kind of officer.

Yeah, he's got the belt clip on his pants. And so, yeah, this guy means business. He also looks like he's on testosterone. You look like wranglers in boots, though. His boots are absolutely dragging over his ostrich. Sorry, his jeans are just dragging on the ground behind his ostrich boots. I mean, props to this guy, but glaring lack of fur on his boots.

Yeah, that's true. Are the bottoms red? Yeah, those are red bottoms. Does he have bloody shoes? Sorry. red yeah those are red let me see i can't tell shoes sorry the photo of the guy of the actual owner wrangling his tiger with the guy pointing and yelling to to get him back get the fuck in the house and then the wife is just or i guess wife or girlfriend is just standing in the doorway it's like this is a chaotic scene for any night of the week are we gonna play the audio of the

guy yelling at the guy with the tiger because he he says at one point, fuck you and your fucking tiger. Get in the house. That's not how you de-escalate a situation, by the way. I just want to say, there is a tiger. If you live in a neighborhood where there are, you know, presumably kids in the neighborhood live around. Yeah, I don't want to hear that shit. I'm just saying, man, like, you don't want a tiger.

Kids these days are so soft. Wandering the neighborhood. If there was a tiger rolling around, man, you don't want a tiger wondering the neighborhood. If there was a tiger rolling around, we would have been riding that thing back in my day. Dude, that would befriend the tiger. Remember Tiger King? Oh, dude. That was epic. That bitch Carole Baskin. Oh, dude.

People got really mad at me for calling her Carole Baskins. I was like, are we really nitpicking that much? Does it really matter? That was what they were mad about. It was just like, okay. We're not mad that they're just, like, you know, torturing these animals and keeping them in captivity in Louisiana. They never pardoned Joe Exotic. Yeah, dude.

He was positive it was getting done. I was pretty sure. Like, dude, just a content pardon? Why, yeah. To be honest, like, it's kind of soft on Trump to not pardon Joe. I know. That's what I said. Didn't they send a big limousine to pick him up, too?

That was good. That just left empty? No, they did everything. That's really sad. They were doing everything in order to get, like, in front of Trump. And, like, yeah, they had limousines ready to, like, take him back from jail and stuff. If you get pardoned, I don't think they just are like, all right, open the cell. Go on.

Feels like there's a checking out process. Yeah, I think they would have to. You got to go down there and they got to make sure everything on the receipt looks right. Give you your belongings back in the little freezer bag. It's like the beginning of Ocean's Eleven. Yeah. Dylan, you said, isn't Ocean's Eight your favorite Ocean's movie? I don't want to answer that.

Shout out to this dude for not killing the tiger. I don't know how he didn't kill him. Once the tiger crossed the street and got on his side of the street. It was within 10 feet of him. That's when you get to the point where it's like, I'm going to pull the trigger on this tiger. When the dude who has the original video turns the camera and starts walking i thought oh no we're about to hear some shots someone tweeted in response to this video typical american sees a problem and gets a gun eye roll emoji it's not a it's a fucking tiger this isn't your run to the yeah run it yeah

this isn't like the neighbors are not arguing about something there's a tiger wandering the streets it's not like a dog that like attacked your dog and got in a scuffle on the sidewalk. In a highly populated area. Dylan, you're on record saying that you could take a tiger one-on-one. Yeah. What would you have done in this scenario? That's something you've often said. Every time a clip of a jag that's taking down a 12-foot gator hits the TL, people attack me.

Oh, you think you can take this thing? No, I've never said that. Dude, you're always saying that. I've never said that. I can't take a cougar or a jag. I've heard you tell some stories about taking down cougars. Or a tiger or a lion. Can't do it.

Answer the question. No, no. Stop. I'm not doing that. I said cheetah. Or bobcat, too, of course. Bobcat, yeah. Goldthwait?

I think Fritz could take down a Bobcat. Sally was watching a Wanda Sykes video yesterday, and I was just like, are you watching Wanda Sykes stand-up right now? What's going on right now? She's got some good stand-up. I just went down this whole rabbit hole of just thinking of all these comics that I'd never think of anymore. Wanda Sykes was on that list.

Bobcat Goldthwait. Goldthwait? Goldthwait. I don't know what the hell you're talking about. You know who Bobcat Goldthwaite is? Dude, check that out. Dylan is so dejected. I'm not checked out. What are we talking about? Just for that split second, though. Yeah, I don't know who you're talking

about. There's no reason for you to. He hasn't done anything in 20 years. Okay, good. Good. Dude dude are the bobcat stands gonna come after us are there bobcat stands out there they didn't come out the goldies they didn't come out after us after i mentioned that your favorite stand-up comic was uh cat cat williams that still shocks me he's not my favorite stand-up. I just said he had some good stand-up. You've seen him live at least three times.

No, I don't think I have. I don't know. He played the voice of a jackalope in the 2018 movie Henchmen. Wow, this person sounds awesome. What voice does a jackalope have? Hard to say. I feel like Randy knows. Have you seen Henchmen, Randy?

He says no, he has not. What's up, guys? It's me, Jackalope. What's up, guys? Meet Jackalope. Do we have a sassy Jackalope in the building right now? Buongiorno. Yeah, his IMDB is trash right now. All right, he's probably living off some royalties.

I think Bobcat's doing just fine. What jungle animal are you excited to see if it's roaming your neighborhood? Jungle animal. Tropical bird. Oh, yeah, toucan. Because it's not going to hurt anything. It's just going to look aesthetically pleasing. Put off a vibe. That's true.

Maybe there might be some rum floaters in my future. That's true. The most terrifying would be like a silverback. Yeah. Any apex predator. Because they just, they fight dirty. Well, something people don't realize

about silverbacks is that their backs are silver. I think people do. That's how you identify it. I think people do realize that. Did y'all see Rory? Got some gray. Got quite a bit of gray.

Touch of gray? Looks good, though. Looks like a guy who's got a young child. How do we feel about his throw into the crowd? It looked okay. Right? It had major me throwing a vortex vibe for a second. Oh, no.

But he definitely threw it longer than I threw the vortex. He definitely threw it further than Dylan punted the donut hole. How far can you punt a golf ball? I could probably punt a golf ball about There's a bounce factor too About 60 feet That would hurt How many yards is that? No 20 yards

Obviously God You think it would hurt? Yeah Golf ball's pretty hard dude So this guy apparently got the tiger and I It says You think it would hurt? Yeah. Golf ball's pretty hard, dude. So this guy apparently got the Tiger. It says they put him in his Jeep Cherokee and drove away.

Yeah, so what's next with this? How do you just put a Tiger? I need to see more video. The laws are being broken. Yeah, you have to think that there are some people of the law showing up to his house today, maybe asking a couple questions. Call me crazy. I mean, anytime you have numerous angles from the same neighborhood incident,

you know that people might be checking in on you. You know, Tiger's the biggest of the cats. A lot of people don't know that. It's bigger than lions? Yeah. Some people might say, oh, what about a liger? Dude, liger...

It's not like a fake animal, really. I don't deal with fusion. Can I ask a question about Liger? Cats. You don't fuck with mules? Oh, just cats? Yeah, fusion cats is where I draw the line. Are Ligers...

Do those exist in the wild, or is that just something that we do in captivity? Unless someone, like, released one. It's like a Bernadoodle. Okay. Basically, you gotta make one. So, lions... It's a designer cat. They're not crossing lines and fucking each other.

They're bred because they're hypoallergenic. That makes sense. They make great pets. What if you're a regular out in the jungle or wherever and somebody released a liger and didn't really tell anybody and you're just walking along, doing your routine

and all of a sudden you're like, holy shit. The fuck is that? It's a half lion half tiger dial up your boys like dude are you seeing this dude why are they so big though are they chunky boys how much do they weigh hard to say we get tagged in liger content often can't look it up man man. Yeah, you can. I just did. Oh, really? Mm-hmm. Oh. Dude, they are big. Jeez, these are too big. Yeah. You know, some of these weigh up to 2,200 pounds.

Imagine how much expired Walmart meat it would take to feed that thing. Or if some nice old lady was nice enough to donate her horse because she can't tend to it anymore and then you uh murder said horse and feed it to your tigers and not tell her so what i'm reading right now says that ligers are bigger than tigons what's a tigon i feel like it's the same thing call me crazy i guess i guess you'd have a female tiger and a male lion versus like the opposite and i don't know which one would be which huh it seems. It seems to me that this would just be the same thing. Because I know when you

create a mule, it's obviously a donkey and a horse, but one of them has to impregnate the other. It can't be the other way around. I think a donkey has to impregnate a horse. I think. But it's hard to say. I'm trying to read and I just don't even know.

I hope this tiger gets rehomed. I hope we learn the name of this tiger, because I'm sure it's something worth noting. How do you let it outside like that? What happened? Maybe he just dug a little hole under the gate. I got out again. I've got to fix that. They have a tiger door?

Fix the latch on the gate. Long guy's left the gate out again. I got to fix that. They have a tiger door? Got to fix the latch on the gate. Long guy's left the gate open again. Yeah. I just want to know what the inside of this guy's house looks like where he's just got a tiger roaming around. What's your deal, dude? How do you trust it not to just kill you? I wonder if it's been declawed.

I hope not. That's cruel. There's no way. Declah! It's not de- That's a Toy Story reference. It's not de-teethed. Was it?

It's got teeth still I don't need claws to kill you There's many ways That thing could swap me And knock me out Yeah I'm a bitch Well yeah

I didn't want to say it But yeah You said it with your eyes Tigers are fucking dope though man Whatever One of the original tweets Said that like Residents were showing up

Like multiple residents With like With handguns. So it's like everybody just rolled. And, like, you know there were some people that were itchy just to, you know, get out there and put one in that tiger. Not me, man. Not me. I want to see that tiger be okay and go to a safer place, safer environment.

A place for tigers. What, you're not going to roll up with your Tommy gun, spray the block? Nah. Hey, tiger, get back in your Tommy gun, spray the block? Nah. Nah, I'm saying spray the block. Hey, tiger, get back in your domicile. Your domicile. About to be lights out. That thing will be singing, Zuri.

They should rehome it to Schlitterbahn. A tiger. Yeah. Just let it live out its days in the water park. What if Schlitterbahn goes out of business and a bunch of tigers just re-home there? That'd be so sick. It's like when they reintroduced wolves into Yellowstone. Changed everything.

Wolves change rivers. People don't know that. I'm going to eat you. Ow! Roar! Oh, that was good. Have you been practicing your animal noises? I don't think wolves sound like that.

What's wrong with the Astros? Roar! What? They were struggling coming out of the gate this season. Okay. I think they had turned it around. I hope not. Oh.

Cheaters. Fuck the Astros. Cheaters. What are the Rockets doing? Roar! What is he doing? I don't know. I'm not really sure what they were doing.

He's Houston references. Right, but why? This tiger. He's just walking not really sure what they do. He's Houston references. Right, but why? This tiger, he's just walking around trying to get some answers. Oh, the tiger that is, he doesn't live in Houston. Oh, so your voice, okay, okay. Yeah, he's a very, he's a low testosterone. Disgruntled Houston sportsman. Disgruntled with low testosterone, might I add.

Right. Doesn't have, he kind of lost his role. Why is he juvenile? Yeah, he has his balls hadn't dropped or whatever. Maybe he took some warhead pre-workout and just wanted to go wild out in the streets. I don't like pre-workout will. You don't see – pre-workout's for guys like us and the Dans of the world, guys who are just – we're going to ruin our bodies just to get a limited amount of gains.

You are pure. Is it Warhead like the candy brand? Yeah. Okay. Okay. So it's a white powder, and then you put it into the cup. I know how pre-workout works. We know how to do it.

When you stir it, it turns red. Oh. Ooh. Shocked me the first time it happened. I was like, whoa. Whoa. You want to try my Total War zombie blood? No, I don't think I want to do pre-workout anymore.

I have a little bit left in the bag. The first time your face gets tingly, it's shocking. Your ears itch, man. It's weird. Emily told me. I texted her. I was like, hey, I just took some of that. She goes, oh, time your face gets tingly, it's shocking. Your ears itch, man. Emily told me. I texted her. I was like, hey, I just took some of that. She goes, oh, is your face tingling yet? And I said, no.

And then 10 minutes later, I was like, oh, my face be tingling. I kind of like that feeling now. I'm a tingle boy, for sure. Yeah, for sure. Get a ting off. Hey, you know, something I've been thinking about, I guess I'll say it here. I've been thinking. I almost wrote something about this.

But I think that good narrative podcasting requires so much work from so many people, research, interviews, working with the archival audio, writing scripts, et cetera, and then there are guys who just turn on the mic and BS for an hour and put up huge numbers. It's true. I've been thinking about that a lot. We're more of the narrative type. People don't realize how much time it takes to put this together. We are gifted storytellers, one might say.

Like the sad salad of noted viral clip. That was awesome. Explain the sad salad one more time. We could be one of the biggest podcasts in the world if you made more salads with two ingredients in them. I've always said that. Dude, I crushed that story, though? Man, you should do like a BuzzFeed-style recipe video where you just make your sad salad and go viral. People would be really excited about that.

That's a good idea. I'm still scared of lettuce after my sweet green run-in. Full-body explosion? I think I missed an episode, didn't I? Did you? Just be careful of sweet green with that romaine. I still go to sweet green. Dude, lettuce has a moment every two years where something goes wrong.

There's a limited window to buy romaine lettuce in the stores. You always have to just Google romaine before you go to the store and buy it. Maybe just don't do lettuce. It's not necessary. Unless you like that little crunch. I mean, it gives you the crunch, but there's other store and buy it. Maybe just don't do lettuce. It's not necessary. Unless you like that little crunch. I mean, it gives you the crunch, but there's other ways to do it. Yeah, these Romance salads, they're not built in a day. I'm more of a wedge salad guy.

We know that, dude. You always talk about wedge salad. We get it. Wedge salad is bae. Do you think our kids are going to give their boys wedgies and stuff? I think wedgies are on the way out, man. Stan, you cancel. Wedgie, swirly, pants.

Can you wedgie somebody in boxer briefs? Don't pants anybody. Yes, you could. Because pantsing is something I'm glad. You've got to be careful pantsing people. Because if you grab undies too, that's a big problem. You've got to get the bottom of the basketball shorts and just rip them down and hope they're wearing some boxer briefs. You don't go undies too, Dave. a big problem. You've got to get the bottom of the basketball shorts and just rip them down and hope they're wearing some boxer briefs.

You don't go undies too, Dave. That's too much, man. You can't physically expose someone. I've seen it done. We've got a good friend who's done this podcast a couple times who might be really into fly fishing that's been pantsed on. Is he named after a fish itself?

He might be. Wow. I've seen, there's a... Have I shown you that video? They set him up. I've seen the videos. They set him up during a Cowboy game. They're like, we're going to shotgun beers and they score. They score. They go outside and they toss

him the beer and he tips it back to shotgun and somebody just walks up and pantses him. In the front yard. Did he finish the shotgun? No. Dang. Don't pants people, man. I'm canceling pantsing. Well, dude, you can't do that in 2021. What are you standing? Swirlies or wedgies? Oh, I'm standing a

wedgie's all time, man. No, wedgies can, like, hurt. They can rupture your bits. Okay, a swirly? Putting someone's head inside a place where people do do? Yeah, but you're not doing it in a dirty toilet. It's ass-eating season. True.

Thank you, David. Okay, it's not a dirty toilet, but, I mean, it's a toilet. Dude, even if it's a brand-new toilet, I don't want my head in there. What if there's a bidet in there and you just get, like, a hair wash? That's kind of tight. As long as it's the tushy. Just like a little... I've been loving my tushy lately.

Any petty swirly? Not bad. A little day out. Can we talk about Elon on SNL? Can I say something about Swirlies real quick before we do that? You can. This is a final word with Dave. Did y'all ever have – I had a family.

My grandpa, he had in one of his toilets, in all of his toilets, he had the blue water. And I always thought it was the coolest thing in the world as a kid really i don't know why because it was different and it was just like was he a part of the blue man group no i mean my grandpa wasn't in the blue man group that's too bad no i kind of wish that uh fritz was born around halloween when he was like a kid and didn't have much hair so i could just paint him blue what if i was the uh the heir to the blue man group should we shave our son's heads and make him Blue Man Group

for Halloween this year? Yes. We should have just done it. I think we need to be the Blue Man Group next year for Halloween. I'll shave my head for content. I'm in.

Will you shave your head for content? No. I'll wear a shower cap. That's so creepy, though. Yeah, I don't like that. I don't want to shave my freaking head. Can we talk about Elon? Yes, I've been trying to. Don't keep bringing shit up. That's so creepy, though. Yeah, I don't like that. I don't want to shave my freaking head.

Can we talk about Elon? Yes, I've been trying to. Dylan keeps bringing shit up. You haven't been trying to. He's talking about your dumbass blue toilet shit. Shut up. Talking about your uncle's blue toilet. My grandpa.

Oh, how cool. Shout out to your grandpa. He passed away many years ago. Thanks. Oh, sorry. Rest in peace. Didn't we already discuss this? We have no living grandparents on this pod?

Yeah, it's true. Oh, is it funny randy yeah what's so funny what's so funny randy okay gen z randy over here damn dude you guys are old he hates grandparents yeah whatever i mean it's old folks good so el So Elon was on SNL. When this news got delivered to the masses, I couldn't help but think that this

was just going to be the worst. And I don't know if it delivered any higher than my expectations. His opening monologue was a little bit uncomfortable. He's just, he's a weird guy obviously, but what we learned he has Asperger's. Why did Elon...

Why is he doing this? Preparing for an entire week of hosting SNL is a very time-intensive thing, and I feel like he's got bigger things going on in the world than being on SNL. Because he is doing his best to immerse himself into pop culture. He's big on the Twitter. He talks about all the cryptocurrencies the kids are doing. He does the memes.

He's a big meme guy. He talked about memes quite a bit on the episode. He talked about Doge real quick, and I was like, oh, he's trying to really shoehorn in the Doge talk. They tank Doge. Shouts. People lost money on Doge.

That makes me happy, though. If I'm not financially invested into a cryptocurrency, I always hope that it goes down. Well, you know, Dylan pretty much is very exposed to Doge. I'm on Doge. I got Doge. Don't they call you the Doge King? Roger Doge. That's good.

He has this motion that he does with his shoulders. I'm talking about Elon. Yes. He does a joke and then he's like he slinks into himself again. He's very uncomfortable. Yeah. Opening. What did you think about the opening

sketch? The Mother's Day thing with Miley Cyrus? I was surprised that they did the open on Mother's Day and then I said something to Sally about it. And then Sally, I think, correctly pointed out, she's like, Mother's Day is a much bigger holiday than some other holidays out there because literally everyone can celebrate it. She's like, who hates Mother's Day? No one hates Mother's Day.

We have to stand our moms. Maybe Randy. Who knows? Yeah. Randy's like, oh, those old ass. Whatever, dude. Yeah, dude. God.

There was a really funny one. It was the short with Pete Davidson, who was Chad, the astronaut. That was actually pretty funny. People were saying that that saved the show. It was funny, but not because of Elon. It's just a funny story. But to host SNL successfully, the host doesn't have to be the reason the show's funny. It shouldn't be.

And oftentimes you're right. snl successfully the host doesn't have to be the reason the show's funny it shouldn't be and and oftentimes you're right it shouldn't be especially when they get somebody who's not an actor or comedian or any you know what i mean like somebody who's a a fucking whatever he is a ce like a an engineer innovator space guy i don't even know what's the man in the world richest man in the world type um i didn't think it was that bad. I went in completely expecting just to be cringed out and having to change the channel. But there was a couple good lines in his monologue. The writing in some of the sketches wasn't great, but the ones, the pre-recorded sketches were pretty funny.

The first happy hour after COVID, I thought that was enjoyable. The Wario thing, I was like, okay. That one was a little tough. We've gone off the rails here. That one was a little tough. Can you do your Wario impression, Dylan? It's a me, a Wario. Wow.

The disrespect to the Italian-American community. Toadstool got some good FaceTime, though. That was big. Princess was trying to catch it, though. What does that mean exactly? Yeah. Can you explain what catch it means for the people out there that might not be choogy enough to know?

Choogy! I think you know what I mean. She was a little horned. A little horned. She likes it when you do it right there. I don't know if I need more Elon on... It's a Chingy reference. No, I get it.

I know. Don't actually object it. I hated it, but I know. Thanks, I hated it. What were you going to say? Well, just keep going. I just don't know if... I think we're reaching the point where Elon's overexposed.

Here's the deal. If there's... Elon's very polarizing. There's a lot of people who really, really like Elon, and then there's a lot of people who really really like Elon And then there's a lot of people Who really don't This performance Served both people

Because there was people like Oh dude he did better than expected And then there's people Who went in like Thinking it was going to suck And yeah it did suck But most SNLs do suck now He doesn't seem like

A very hateable character To me at all I don't really get it I think Well Based on the two minutes I heard on the Today Show before I left this morning. You're a Today Show guy.

I'm not. I'm not going to name who is. You love Meredith Vieira. My son. Rose, big Today Show guy. Loves Al Roker. Takes after his dad. What happened on the show? No, it wasn't on the show. It was just like, he had some early tweets about COVID saying the pandemic was overblown.

He talked about that last night. They tried to humanize him and disarm people. And then he had some pronoun tweets that apparently weren't great. Oh, okay. And I think he's got a bad history with workers' rights, some of the labor unions and whatnot. So there's people who are just predisposed to not liking him. But I thought he came off as somewhat likable in this. Yeah.

He did disrespect Dan Aykroyd. I don't know if we were talking about this before. So he said he was the first to ever host SNL, first person to openly admit they have Asperger's. And Dan Aykroyd, he's been fairly open about having Asperger's, and he was obviously one of the early cast members of SNL, and I'm assuming he's hosted it. He has hosted.

He returned to host in 2003, David. Okay. And Elon conveniently forgot that Dan Aykroyd. But they did Elon wrong. He didn't write that. Maybe he did. How do you know? Maybe he ad-libbed it.

Okay, that's fair. I heard he just hates Ghostbusters. Have you still not seen it? No, I watched it not this past Halloween, but the Halloween before. He's also not a big fan not still not seen it no i watched it uh not this past halloween but the halloween before he's also not a big fan of uh the great outdoors which is just doesn't make sense to me it's the greatest movie ever made hmm you do like that movie it's the best dude it's the goat summer camp vibes is there a nude scene in it or not did we ever settle that there is not if there was a nude scene in it it would be rated r which didn't you and brett get into that for like three months straight yeah i just don't like it when

people come out of my neck when it comes to great outdoors like i've seen that movie a million times that's one thing i know about you i would never make that mistake yeah the the end scene of the great outdoors might be the greatest ending scene in the history of cinema just putting it out there holy at one point dan eckroyd's dancing and he tries to eat someone's leg like it's a chicken bone. And then he moves on and just starts getting wild with himself. We've all been there. It was a heat check moment for old Dan. I love chicken.

Oh, Dan! Yeah. So, final thoughts on Elon? The Wild West skit at the end. I thought that was kind of funny. I just need Elon. I need Elon to maybe just take a step back for a little bit. I'm tired of seeing every single tweet that he has go crazy viral because I kind of want that too.

He openly admits to stealing memes too, which I kind of think is funny. Everyone steals memes. I know. It kind of makes me sad when I go to someone's Instagram account and they have a million followers and all their reels are just things that they stole from TikTok from tick tock and it's like okay well that's fine you're good it's kind of what we're gonna do but should we just start doing that just stealing everyone's i don't know man um i don't know he's uh till one doesn't know he has such a it's such an influence over the world.

I mean, he's changing a lot of things. He's very intriguing. He tanked your doge. He's very intriguing. Sorry, dude. Let's talk about Vizzy real quick. Vizzy coin. Me personally, I'm a big fan.

If Vizzy had their own cryptocurrency, you have to think that we'd be turning in all of our Bitcoin against some Vizcoin. I like Vizzy so much, I went for a walk around the neighborhood with the family last night and just openly had one out. Just on me. So you didn't port it like a Yeti? You didn't do the Yeti thing where you toss it in there? Don't care. No one came out of their house with a gun? Nope.

Get you and your Vizzy back in the house! Get your Vizzy! Vizzy's tight because it's got the option of something extra. It's called acerola. It's a super fruit. It's acerola drinking season. Everyone knows that. I know all about acerola, man.

It's the first hard seltzer with antioxidant vitamin C because oxidants are trash. And everyone knows that. Brett, did you have any Vizzys this weekend in San Diego? I did. I actually – shout out to my buddy Adam for hosting me for the weekend. He had a squad. We call it Bay Day. We suited up for it on Saturday.

It was the bay where the ocean kind of lets in for a little bit. They hang out at the bay all day. And turned the whole crew on to Vizzies, Will. A couple of 12-packs out there. They were gone. Sorry, I'm rattled by Bay Day, right? Yeah, I was thinking like you just stayed in and ordered pizza. Well, for you, because it's like literally you go out every day with Bay.

Every day is Bay Day. Yeah. Bay Day was tight, though. B-A-Y Day. Did you hit them with some pineapple mangoes or some black cherry limes? Maybe you went the lemonade route and you went, I don't know, maybe a little watermelon lemonade. It was two 12-patches of the lemonade variety pack. Really?

So you guys snapped. Snapped. They were gone, gone. How is that even available in San Diego? That's a peak lemonade drinking place. Yeah, it's lemonade season there. Well, shouts to Ralph's because they had it. Ralph's, they must really like hard seltzers to have zero grams of sugar per 12-ounce serving.

I know I did. They also have a conveyor belt that goes up to their front door. It's pretty cool. It also have a conveyor belt that like goes up to their front door. It's pretty cool. It's like a stairway to heaven but just to their front door. Wow, dude. To the moon. Wow, epic.

Very epic. Grocery stores there sell liquor too which is not a Texas thing. They, a whole bunch. Their whole aisle in there, man. That one's got a lot of fun facts.

I do. You want to talk about marine layers real quick? Yeah, you see that? You hear about these things? Yeah, it's like cloudy until 10 a.m. every morning, then it becomes a beautiful 70-degree sunny day. Cloudy with a chance of acerola.

Upgrade your hard seltzer to Vizzy. To find out where you can purchase Vizzy, go to VizzyHardSeltzer.com. That's VizzyHardSeltzer.com. Must be 21 or older. Brett, hit us with that breaking news playboy. Sure thing. Happy to be here, guys. Thanks for having me.

A little choose your own adventure here. I hope the people that were listening thought you were just sitting here silently the entire episode since we didn't intro you during the ad read. Yeah, that's what we're doing. Dylan. Let's go. Back to you here. Let's go.

Would you like to go Jay-Z, PPP loans, or a Chinese rocket update? H to the Izzo. No. Stop, man. D to the Izzo. I guess we edit it out. If you guys turn off the pot now, we get it. Jay-Z is making waves in the business world by backing a NFT platform.

I've decided I hate NFTs. Jay-Z put $19 million into Bitski. Aren't all Ts inherently frat? Not frat tokens. Bitski? It's a platform to buy and sell cryptocurrency.

And Jay-Z is backing it. Along with Andreessen Horowitz, which is a pretty big venture firm. I don't care. It's bad, man. It's all over. You know who else is in there? You asked for the story.

I know. I thought it would be something cooler than this. Troy Carter and Blow, spelled 3-L-A-W. What is that? That's so stupid. Yeah, I think it's Blow or Blau. 3-L-W? 3-L-A-W? Three. What is that? That's so stupid. Yeah, I think it's blow or blow. Three L-W? Three L-A-W.

Three L-W had some hits back in the day. I hate it. Yeah, I know you do. I know it's not really your thing. This is choogy. This is mad choogy. Mega choogy. Mad choog.

He's also filed the trademark to 2 slash J. I'm going to contest it. For the purposes of entertainment services, the nature of creation, development, production of television, programming, TV series, movies, and similar projects. 2J? 2 slash J. I was going to say, was this high school?

Smoked exactly one J. One joint. Everyone knows the rules. Bitsky, by the way, is the company behind partnering up with Adidas to launch Trevor Lawrence's recent NFT. Oh, my gosh. Wait, time out. Adidas partnered with Bitsky.

I hate this. I don't like Bitsky. To launch Trevor Lawrence's NFT collection. More like Shitsky. Yeah, you're right. Is that Bears quarterback behind this? Mitch bitsky trabitsky that's kind of funny more like they should do something with that no one had me doing this trade oh my gosh i'm not true what is going on why don't you just lean into it dude just dylan chevrier nft i just

i just don't we we should do fake nfts and just put them on Instagram. We did a little bit with Dan. Aren't they really bad for the environment? Yeah. NFTs? That's the knock on Bitcoin. I think that's a lot of anti-Bitcoin propaganda. It's about the energy required to mine them, right? Yep. Yeah.

You ever think about that, Dylan? You ever think about the consequences on the environment every time you buy more Bitcoin? No, but I've started to see people speak up about it, how you shouldn't invest in cryptos because of it. I don't know. What's up with these PPP loans? I don't even know how this shit works. Just give Charles Schwab your money or whatever.

Fuck. You guys got any Schwabs? Got any annuities? Yeah. You got any Schwabs? Hey, Will, you're familiar with PPP loans, right? Yeah. Is that players, pimps, and fraud?

Say it. I don't know. I can't think of anything that starts with P. Oh, sure. You're fine. Anyway, these PPP loans were going out the last year and a half or so to struggling businesses and companies that really needed the money, right? Mm-hmm.

Well, as you can imagine, there's been some taking advantage. Yeah, yeah. You got to think that most of the people that got these were just as you can imagine, there's been some taking advantage. Yeah, yeah. You've got to think that most of the people that got these were just like wiling out. Let me tell you. Firsthand knowledge of someone who people are openly – people who got the loans and didn't need them would just talk about it. What did we do with our PPP? We did not.

We did not partake. We didn't accept any. Really? That's very noble of us. No free money. Pretty nice trader in your backyard there, Dylan. I'm just – Christmas gift. Really? That's very noble of us. No free money. Pretty nice trader in your backyard there, Dylan. Christmas gift.

You go into steakhouses with Bae all the time. That's a great point, Will. Did you get a PPP loan and not tell us? Yep. A California man who received more than $5 million in PP loans was arrested on Friday after he used the money to buy a Lamborghini and other luxury cars.

What an idiot. Mr. Kadiri, 38, of Irvine, was indicted by a federal jury. Indicted sounds bad. I like indicted. On four counts of bank fraud, four counts of wire fraud, one count of aggravated identity theft, six counts of money laundering. Any racketeering? No racketeering.

Did you hear how he got caught? He was on that TikTok of the dude asking what you do for a living and he was like, oh dude, I just got a PPP loan. Nice call. What do you do for a living? No, I just got a loan from the government. They're just giving money away. Have you seen this? You just got to apply, man.

I like how all the rich people that drive those dope-ass cars, like when the guy comes up and asks them what they do for a living, now they're like, oh, you're blah, blah, blah. It's like you know you're rich when you know the guy's name that does the rich people TikTok. Mr. Kadiri snagged a 2011 Ferrari 458. 2011? I know. Come on. 2011? I know.

Come on. Come on, man. Some of those things increase in value over time, though, Dave. But not like a 2011. Maybe like a 77. No, no. You'd be surprised. Really?

Oh, yeah. Okay, you're putting out major vibes with a guy who's been shopping 2011 Lamborghinis. One of us at this table drove a Corvette in high school. I did, but I didn't pay for it. I drove a Subaru. I drove a Jeep Cherokee with the top part just hanging down. That's classic high school shit. It's not good.

How about the 2018 Lamborghini Aventador S? It's a nice car. That sounds great. Their site says, there's no better car to show off your success or stroke your ego. It's a nice That sounds great Their site says There's no better car To show off your success Or stroke your ego It's true Yeah

I could think of some better ones Stroke my ego And a 2020 Bentley Continental Billy Squire A huge Billy Squire I know you are Yep So he got three cars

And went on a couple vacations Dude fuck yeah You can on a couple vacations. Dude, fuck yeah, man. You can't take those vacations back. No. He faces charges that come- Facts. Can't repo a vacation. Yeah, you can't take that memory from him.

The cool part is there was actual businesses who needed this money and they couldn't get it because people like this just drained it. Well, he was buying the cars in his company's names. Oh, sick. Could have been- My car's under the company's name. Really? Yeah, it could have been for clients. Are we going to get Randy's Bronco for him under the company? Are we getting Randy a Bronco? We have to lease it, and it's like a 2,500 mile lease, so it's probably

prohibitive for him, but cheap. Yeah, let's give him the worst mileage. Let's give him a Geo Metro. Geo Metro. Beautiful moat. Is that different? Yeah. Here's give him the worst mileage. Let's give him a Geo Metro. Geo Metro. Beautiful moat. Is that different? Yeah. What? Here's the deal with Mr. Kadiri. If convicted, the charges against him carry a maximum penalty combined of 302 years in prison.

He's not getting 302. He won't live that long. You're right. That's tough. That's a good long. You're right. It's tough. It's a good point. It's tough. Why does everybody, like, there's multiple other cases in here in this article in the New York Times, the failing New York Times. People just keep buying Lamborghinis with this money.

How about this Texas dude? Honestly, that's probably what I would do. If I was going to defraud the government in some capacity, you might see me in a Lambo. Lee Price III. Lee Price triple stitch. LP3? LP3. 20 years in prison.

This dude's hitting. He got a Lamborghini charge against him. It's like, come on, guys. Do less. Anyway. You should allocate some of that money to a Blackwater business to bust you out of prison. Dave, I don't hate that idea. Like they just drop the rope down from a helicopter

and you just grab on and they fly you out. It can't be that easy. I think some drug... Some cartel guys have tried that. Dude, bless you, man. Yeah, let's get the sneezes, huh? Salud. You got double sneezers off.

Anyway, I'm a two-sneeze guy, too. What's up with this Chinese rocket? Well, it landed. Like a rocket ship. In New Jersey or something, right? No, New Jersey. There were rumors that it was going to land in New Jersey, but it was going so fast that if you were off by like an hour

and when it reentered, it was like between New Jersey and the Indian Ocean. They were like, it could be anywhere. It's a big area. I don't know how they didn't have a better grasp on this. We need to like – It was moving fast. You can't just grab a hold of it. But we know when like a –

We know like if there's like an asteroid like 10 billion miles away, like this could hit Earth in 15 years. Yeah. We know we can do that, but we can't figure out where those little rockets are going to – And then there was an asteroid that was Gonna be close to Earth turns out. It was like 150 million like I didn't see it kilometers I didn't even hear it like that's not that close dog It's probably a good thing like I get it space is big, but I'm not worried about this thing

You know dude Dylan could you beat up space? the fucking Sun The only can totally take space the fucking sun Dylan can totally take space I can take space I can fight space I can hold my own at least

yeah for a little bit space is terrifying man five seconds why is it so big Dave think about it why is it so big all that shit up there

damn it's crazy man send you to space after this episode do this to the moon you can pay for your rocket ship

on doge now. You should just get your PPP loan and buy the seat in Bezos' thing to space that he's auctioning off. In Bez? He clearly said Bezos. Oh. I thought Bay had some kind of space thing going on. Dude, Bay is on your mind like all the time. Yeah, you got to chill, dog.

You're always saying she's a freaking rocket ship. Yeah, she's a freaking rocket. He is a rocket. Anyway. So this thing hit? Yeah. I'm confused. a freaking racket. He is a racket. Bro. Anyway. So this thing hit? Yeah, it hit. I'm confused. Where'd it hit?

In the Maldives. I knew it. That'll ruin your vacation. Yeah, it's tough. It's a nice spot south of India, over there in the Maldives. I don't know. So everybody's okay. Are you sure about that?

What's that? Everybody's okay? Everybody made it. Yeah, everybody made it. But the rocket, obviously. Rocket's toast. That's toast. Yeah. Real toast. Okay. No word. It's okay? Everybody made it. Yeah, everybody made it. But the rocket, obviously. The rocket's toast. That's toast. Yeah.

Okay. It's swimming with the fishes now. Yeah. They got the rocket, right? What do you mean? They, like, fished it out? You can't just leave the rocket, can you? I don't know.

There's probably a U.S. Navy SEAL team in there just checking out Chinese. Or, or. That's not what they said. Oh, I got chased by SEALs this weekend. Literally. Navy SEALs? No. You were in San Diego. That's scary. That's not what they said. Oh, I got chased by seals this weekend. Literally. Navy seals? No. You were in San Diego.

That's scary. That would be a little frightening. If you got chased by Navy seals, he wouldn't be with us. You'd be done. I was snorkeling. That's tough. Damn, have a weekend, Brett. I'm pretty sure those are sea lions.

I think I asked that, and I think I got corrected to seals. You were in La Jolla? I was in La Jolla. Those are sea lions, dog. Were they? All right. There's a huge size difference between a seal and a sea lion. They're small guys. I mean, they're probably the size of Is this Marine Layer Part 2?

They're the size of parks? Yeah, they were parks. Maybe they were seals. I don't know. Wait, I'm very confused. They were the size of parks or they said parks as their No, they were probably three or four feet long. Parks can be really big or really small. Sea lions gather at La Jolla Cove. That's why I'm very confused. Was it the size of parks or they said parks as their... No, they were probably three or four feet long. Parks can be really big or really small. Sea lions gather at La Jolla Cove. That's why I'm thinking that.

Yeah, I was snorkeling off the coast of La Jolla. Bruh. How'd you get there? Did you take like the... I walked barefoot. Did you take the 405? No, just the five, dude. Everybody walking around in the Honda Civic, but time to launch.

I'm really bummed you didn't hit Hoedats while you were out there, man. I told you. I was like, this is a really good recommendation. You've got to go to Hoedats and Ocean Beach, dude. I bet you didn't even go to OB. No, I didn't go to OB. You just hang out at Mission Beach. You can talk shit about anything you want.

If you want to talk about one-handing burgers and how that's bullshit, which it is, you can do that. But don't talk shit on ho-dads, dude. Ho-daders goes hard. So actually, Brett and I have a mutual friend, and he was texting me during the trip. He was like, dude, Brett is mega choogy on this trip right now. Dude, I wasn't chooed. Were you seriously buying well tequila shots for everybody? No, shouts to Kelsey, though.

She did. Kels. Yeah, Kels. Yeah, Kels. Actually, we went to- What are you doing, Kelsey?

We went to- Kelsey? Queer though? Seriously? Oh, man. No, I didn't go to Hodad's.

We didn't do- I didn't have enough time. I was a quick rip. I served. Quick rip. I gotta say- Pacific Beach is a cool area, huh? Dude, it's sick. I served. I got to say. Pacific Beach is a cool area, huh? Dude, it's sick.

I expected you to come back a lot more blood red. No, I put the SPF 50 on. Dude, smart. The sun there, I swear, it doesn't tan you. It just burns you. Don't know if you can back that up with science. I'm serious, man. Dude, we went to Baja Beach Cafe. I like burning, though.

Catch me a burning man. Dude, we went to Baja Beach Cafe. I like burning, though. Catch me at Burning Man. You know Weed's legal out there. I didn't do any of the weed. You didn't burn? Didn't burn. This dude doesn't even burn. Didn't burn. Did you CBD?

What an idiot. Didn't CBD, just got hammered. They have 36-ounce margs with four shots in them. Did you have fish tacos? I did. I did. I had the fish tacos at El Prez. No one needs a mark that big.

It was in like the 7-Eleven, like big gulp cups. It's like a Yeti that's this big. Yeah, it was literally that. Is El Prez good? I heard it's the best to ever do it. One bite, though, you can only take. Okay. The worst to ever do it.

Yep, saw that. Sorry we just completely torpedoed you. All right, one more. Dude, finish on a high. No, that's it. Yep. Saw that. Sorry we just completely torpedoed you. All right, one more. Dude, finish on a high. No, that's it, dude. Oh, fuck.

Watermelon sugar? Oh, then we went to PBL houses. It was fine. Calcic? That's just my buddy's girlfriend. Did you drink some

pineapple sculpins or what? No. How about the what's it called? Something cart? Mango wheat? Sure. I don't fucking know's it called? Something cart? Mango wheat? Sure. I don't fucking know, dude.

Really? Golden cart, maybe? I've retired from IPAs. You went to Golden Corral on your vacation. Actually, you went to San Diego just to go to Golden Corral. This is going to hurt some feelings. We did go to Bruder's for breakfast sandies. I think we need to get out of this episode.

Is that the bagel place? Yeah. Yeah, we have one down the street. One down the street. It's not bad. The chain. Honestly, I can't tell the difference between that and a New York bagel.

No, it's pretty much the exact same. Everyone says that. They import their water. They have a pipeline. Yeah. And then I went to Woody's. And the Russians hacked it. 888-618-4422.

Went to Woody's on Sunday morning, though. I made up for it. Went to the local spot. Really? You woke up with a... It's very cool. And you know what's fun about Woody's is they lean into the... Morning wood joke, Will made.

They lean into the innuendo. You can get like a morning wood sandwich. Makes sense. It's like going to Dick's Last Resort. Right. I'm sorry? Cut my... In two pieces.

That was a bad version of that song. Can we leave? There's easier ways to go. Let's get out of here. All go. Let's get out of here. All right, let's get out of here. Bye. Bye. Bye.

Bye. Bye.