Circling Back - You See That Dude's Ass?

Episode Date: July 5, 2021

Micah Wiener comes out of semi-retirement to join Dave and Dillon as they discuss a guy's ass at the bar, Zuckerberg on a hydrofoil, radioactive and indestructible hogs, a columnist who hates grilling, neighborhood fireworks as a dad, Sun’s Owner Robert Sarver’s funeral roast, and Brett's Breaking News. Support us on Patreon and receive weekly episodes for as low $5 per month: www.patreon.com/circlingbackpodcast Watch all of our full episodes on YouTube: www.youtube.com/washedmedia Cuts Clothing: Go to cuts clothing dot com slash STEAM for 15% off. Raycon: Go to buy Rayon dot com slash STEAM for 15% off. Solo Stove: Go to solostove.com and get $10 off when you use promo code STEAM. (23:00) Zuck wylin’ (30:00) Radioactive Hogs (34:00) Grilling Is Bad Guy (48:06) Fireworks With A Kid (58:02)  Sun’s Owner Robert Sarver’s Funeral Roast Routine --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/circling-back/message Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

all right we are back it's the circling back podcast presented by busy heart seltzer it's the only heart seltzer with vitamin Z and, Dylan, superfruit acerola. Superfruit acerola. It is the only way I enjoy my hard seltzer. A lot of people were saying that we wouldn't record today. They're like, man, nobody's working. These guys aren't going to be working. They're not going to be in the stew. They're not going to be shooting shots in the gym. I was talking to Bay this morning. I was like, what do you got for work today? And she goes, oh, we have off. And I said, oh, yeah. I forgot.

Watch me. It's just built different. That's crazy. Like, they take a day off? Yeah. Because they stayed up until 1030 listening to fireworks? Dude, no days off. We put in, like, so many hours.

It's crazy. Will's not here. Will's in northern Michigan with the fam. The Harbor Springs area. Yeah. Not the UP. Don't confuse those two things. So I'm here and I'm going to be doing this deal.

So if you don't like it, just email Will at washedmedia.com. We do have a guest host, though. Hi, haters. We know that voice. Hello, fam. There goes that man. It's Micah. It's Micah Weiner. That's right. Thank you. Always Micah. It me Micah Weiner, ladies and gentlemen. That's right. Thank you.

Always Micah. It me. In the middle of his yoga journey. That's true. A lot of yoga for your boy. Trying to get loose. Trying to stay loose. I don't know if you go with the undershirt. You know, it's a new thing that I'm doing.

It's undershirt season. It's undershirt season. What does Pitts do? I don't know if it helps or hurts, to be honest. It just seems right. All right, man. It's a new look for me. Do you? Yeah. So if you're new here and just seems right. All right, man. It's a new look for me. Do you?

Yeah. So if you're new here and you're like, all right, who's this guy hosting? Who's this guy guest hosting? I normally don't host. As I said, we'll host. I'm pretty sure that our listeners are familiar with you at this point. We have new listeners all the time. Okay, well.

It's called a reset, a hard reset. But this guy, Micah, if you're new here, if you're new, he used to produce our old podcast, Touching Base. I remember that, yeah. Base for Touch. Yeah, I remember that. Thanks to Micah. He was the, somehow, even though he spoke the least on that podcast,

he was the most polarizing figure by far. Between serving up tacos back behind his taco bar. Straight up taco bar. Slamming the door and tossing cans into the trash can from 12 feet away. He was actually a pretty damn good producer. Damn good producer until he got a phone call mid-pod, and he would just get up and walk out of the room and take it and not really tell us anything.

We were like, all right, I guess Mike is going to be gone for the next five to eight minutes. It was probably an important call. It's great to be back with you guys. For those of you who don't know who I am, I would encourage you to find me on the social medias at Michael Weiner, M-I-C-A-H-W-I-E-N-E-R. Not on Twitter at the moment because I have been hacked on my verified Twitter account. It has been a downright journey with this Twitter account. It certainly has.

It started off as yours. Yes. Then it was hijacked by our friend J-Bone. Correct. Became verified. J-Bone managed to verify what was clearly a satire account. Actually, we learned of this news live on a Touching Base episode. A legendary episode, at least in my mind.

So you've had it all these years and now it has changed hands once again. And we don't know who has your account. Well, someone calling themselves Thugger. Whoever it is. And so I don't think it's Slim Thug, but it could be. Whoever it is has blocked me, and I don't appreciate it.

And I believe Dave has also blocked himself. He or she or they are assholes. I would like it if it was Slim Thug. That would be a turn of events. That would be kind of sick. That would be cool. If it's J-Bone, I will hunt him down and murder him. I don't think it's Bone. Bone wouldn't do that. We'll talk to Bone on Wednesday about it. You'll find out.

We'll ask him. I don't think it's the Bone, but I think there's a greater than 0% chance it's the Bone. He's probably suspect number one. That's right. It's not him, but it's the bum. He's probably suspect number one. I mean, that's right. He's probably the most. It's not him, but it's most likely him.

Based on history, he's got to be. Yeah, he's on the list. Guys, if you're not already doing so, please go follow at Circling Back Pod and at Washed Media on your social media platform. Lots of good content. Mainly Twitter and Instagram. Thank you. Check those out. The Washed Media Grom has been outstanding recently. Mainly Twitter and Instagram. Thank you. Check those out. The Watch Media Grom has been outstanding recently.

Shout out to the Meep team. It's been a point of, yeah, we've done some things, man. We've made some things happen, and I'm glad that people are noticing. Thank you. Also, leave a review and a five-star rating. Tell a friend about the podcast. If you want to become a, what did we decide? Will wants it to be the Circling Back Deputies. He's deputy basically an ambassador but i don't know what he's doing i i i am more privy to or prone

to like calling them sheriffs just because it has a more little bit more power in the line of authority but whatever tell a friend tell a co-worker tell a cousin tell somebody you don't like i don't care check out youtube.com slash washed media we've got content there we've got a we've got a just a very full service turnkey video team led by randy trumbacki who we'll hear from shortly and uh shout out to the interns timo and and cool uh what's his name cool adam i almost forgot i almost said cool randy and like that's not a thing uh and by the way we do uh patreon stuff too tomorrow we'll be talking Bachelorette Dylan and I and Mystery Guest and then on Thursday

or Friday well confusingly we do Friday voicemails but we release it on Thursday now what do you think about that business decision Micah okay I mean I think that the optimized backers deserve the content as soon as they can get it so it's probably a smart business decision.

If you want to wait, you can wait. If you want to edge our content, feel free to edge. Or you can just get it right then. If it's a Friday tradition, just wait. There you go. Damn. Speaking of traditions, we've got to give some shout-outs. Good to have something to look forward to.

You want to give some shout-outs real quick? Sure. Is this the dude in the bar at Dirty Bills? Who are we shouting out? We'll close with that ass. Okay. Right now, we're going to give a shout out to John Duda, a friend of the program, Internet Party Zone,

who is down bad, very bad. Out jogging on his lunch break, hit by a vehicle. He's alive and well. Not well. He had surgery to restructure his ankle. But, like, he's in good spirits. He's down mega bad. He will recover.

I believe he saw bone, which is you don't want to see bone. So that's a compound fracture. Unless it's J-bone, you don't want to see bone. Well, you don't really want to see that either. Yeah. Let's get serious. Yeah, shouts to Duda. He's down bad, but I looked at his spirits this morning with a picture that I sent him that he needed it.

He needed it. You sent him a photo. I did, yeah. Of what? Of a young man, a gentleman bellied up to a bar in Austin, Texas with an absolute just caked up mega dumper on him. Just a wagon? Yeah.

Okay. Yeah. Hey, also sneaky shout out to Ape Shit Supplements for the care package. This is free ad. They sent us a – we have not tried any of their product, but they saw not my video, not our video, but Dylan's. Dylan's video. Dylan's somewhat mega viral TikTok video, real or fake.

I tipped a T-Mobile, but it was my video. Real or fake pre-workouts. They apparently saw it, and they're like, we've got to get these guys some sups. And those sups include orangutan juice. Or was it orangutan blood? What was it? It's juice, orangutan juice. And then there's another one in there like, I think it's just like gummy bear. Some gummy bear flavored stuff. Yeah.

They sent us all kinds of pre-workouts and BCAA type stuff. It looks like the kind of stuff that's going to make your ears tingle. You know what I'm talking about. I know exactly what you're speaking of. This is the kind of stuff where I'm going to pull back the curtain on Brad Key. Brad Key, there was a time he used to – Mike is co-host on Backdoor Cover, right? Yes, yes.

And so Brad used to be our ad guy at our old company, and Brad would mainline pre-workout in the morning before work. Not mainline, but he would take pre-workout and just get juiced up and then just go sell ads, and I loved it. Yeah i went to gnc with brad one time on our lunch break and uh he asked the guy uh he was looking he's like which one do you like better you know nothing's more fun than talking to the guy at gnc oh yeah um they live for it they live for it and you're like brad was like which one is better and the guy's like well this one's good but this one this one will make you you know i might suggest this one really makes you jittery and uppity and you know you don't really want that brad's like that's exactly what i want yeah i

want to be shaking before i get to the gym right yes you know i mean and maybe the ape shit guys are built different too so shouts to them i may have they sent some cool merch too we did we got some t-shirts as well that's dylan d's going to be wearing his to the gym later. It just says ape shit. That's right. With a gorilla face. Yeah. Exactly. Hey, also, major shout out to the Will Mommies. We got a care package today

from one Crimson Pavlikovsky. I believe I've said that correctly. By the way, great penmanship on her. She wrote us a nice little note. I did notice that. I also noticed that the glaring lack of Stella picture in the IndyCar package. There's a Randy and a Rosie. Yeah. I would love for the Stella one to show up.

You know why. Why are you doing her like this? I don't exactly know why. She entered it into an internal art competition within her company, is what the note says. Within her company. I thought it was like a Wilmommies thing. No, no, no, no.

Like a little art show. No, no. Apparently, this painting she did or drawing. So she's most proud of the Stella. Yeah. Okay. So instead of throwing shade at this nice young lady. Look, I was so impressed by the ones that she sent of Rosie and Randy that I was like,

man, I've got to get my hands on the Stella. When Dylan pulled out the one of the white golden retriever, he was like, no, this is definitely Stella. I'm like, no, that's absolutely Randy. That dog is a unit. Look at the head on that thing. Well, the Stella one has more of a blockhead, and that's Randy. I don't want to say anything, but she's kind of got a blockhead, bro. I don't know.

It's a feature of the breed no blockhead is what is what you want that's what i'm saying all right we're losing micah micah's got the phone out micah what are you doing well i just had an announcement uh will defreeze has gotten a grom off oh really live from the great lake state i'm sure it has nothing to do with uh the fact that we're recording right now and it's just a cry for attention and speaking of cries for attention you should see the Grom that I got off yesterday. I'm making a return to content, Cam. Dude, you killed the caption.

At Micah Weiner. Absolute fire caption. Why don't you tell people what that was? Well, it had a typo previously. It's been edited since. But yeah, it's a shirt from RowdyGentleman.com. You guys remember that website. Dylan is the original Rowdy Gentleman. That's true. You inspired the brand. I don't know if that's accurate. People at the gym. It's a shirt from RowdyGentleman.com. You guys remember that website. Dylan is the original Rowdy Gentleman.

That's true. You inspired the brand. I don't know if that's accurate. People at the gym. It's a good time. You heard about him getting recognized at the gym in the locker room, just full on crank out. Was the guy like, what's up, Rowdy?

He said, not to be weird, but are you one of the Rowdy Gentlemen? And I never wanted to crawl into a hole so quickly in my life. That's tough. and I never wanted to crawl into a hole so quickly in my life. That's tough. Anyway, I have an American flag Hawaiian from RowdyGentleman.com that I wear once a year. Is that what you were wearing when you went to the mall and got kicked out for filming a commercial?

No, that was more of a wintertime Hawaiian because that was around Christmas. That's a whole other story. Can I give a shout-out? Do whatever you want man to Marv Albert I'm going to miss Marv, he called his last game the other day 55 years in the NBA yes!

and it counts that's not a very good Marv Albert I miss him, it was strangely emotional I was hoping the series would go 7 I found myself rooting for Brooklyn in the previous series because Marv is from Brooklyn. I wanted his last game to be there, but it didn't happen that way. Did you watch the touching tribute afterward from Reggie

and then the guys on the NBA? I did. Reggie's the worst. Oh, why? He's really good. Reggie isn't really good. But this isn't a sports podcast. But I just want to shout out Marv.

You were on one. I know Marv's an optimized backer, so I wanted to shout him out. Okay, well, I don't think that's true. I think Kenny is. Oh, okay. Oh, Kenny Albert. The Jet. I have no shouts, by the way.

No, Kenny Albert, his son. Oh, Kenny Albert. I see. I thought you were talking about Kenny the Jet. I've got a really good Kenny Albert. It's not like Fat Albert. Hello, I'm Kenny Albert. Doesn't it?

That was a spectacular move by David Ruff. I've got a better brain than Marv Albert. Yeah, you do a good brain. Puts it up, puts it in. That's not even that good. We just do impersonations here sometimes. People, like, really enjoy it. Hey, did you all do anything fun this uh

prior weekend it was a holiday weekend it was a holiday weekend i had a pretty damn good weekend actually i'm gonna let you i might yield my time to the three of you guys and the third person being randy because i'd like to hear about his oh i'm i'm hot we should leave the floor for randy at the end don't start us off yeah sure friday went to a little river house situation down in new bronfels on the Guadalupe. You guys hear about this river? It's actually New Braunfels. It's actually not.

New Braunfels. I had an excellent time. Some friends have a sweet little pad down there on the river, and we just took some lawn chairs down there. Was it Tad's house? It wasn't Tad's house. Are these new friends or old friends? These are new friends.

Okay. Dude, they iced you, bro. You know who iced me was Bae. Bae iced me. Who does that? Dude, Shorty came through with the icing. She said, hey, can you take that box outside to the garbage? I was like, yeah, where is it?

She goes, just go outside. You'll see it. I was like, that sounds a little sus, right? Suspect. Sus. And so I was like, okay. Micah. So I pick up this box, and I was like, you know what? There's an ice in here. And so I was like okay Micah so I pick up this box and I was like you know what

I there's an ice in here and so I know I did it I took a knee she did she posted a video on her Instagram she sure did and I said uh payback's a bitch and she of course goes oh I won't I won't drink it if you ever do that to me so wow so yeah the river was fun So I won't wear the Arby's polo. You won't get that booty bleached. And she won't take the ice. That's right. Basically, that's the trifecta of. Yeah.

The three horsemen. Yeah. Welching on bets. We had a little fun little dinner in New Braunfels that night. Hit a bar. It was fantastic. Where'd you go to dinner? Krause's.

German? Yeah. Yeah. So it's a German community down there. Yes, it is. It is. They really love it when you go down there and float the river. They're very nice about that.

I may have even had some wiener schnitzel that night. Wow. A little schnitz? A little glisten schnitz. Had to do it to them. A little schnitz over here. A little glitchel. No, that didn't work.

Anyway, Saturday I went out to the ranch. A whole big family situation out there. Great photo of Parks. Did fireworks. Yep. A whole ranch thing. I guess Parks and that horse out to the ranch. The whole big family situation out there. Great photo of Parks. Did fireworks. Yep. The whole ranch thing. I guess Parks and that horse squashed the beef.

Yeah. Yeah. They got over it, man. It's good. And that's pretty much it, man. Yesterday was a pretty mega chill day. Closed it out by hanging out with Bay and Lil' Bay and Parks, and it was fun, man. Did y'all watch fireworks?

Bedtime is 8 o'clock, which, of course, man. Did y'all watch fireworks? Bedtime is 8 o'clock, which of course the sun is still up at 8 o'clock right now, so no. Damn. How'd y'all's dogs do with the fireworks? More on that later. Stella handles it very well, thankfully. That's good. Charlie, not so well.

Sorry to hear. What was your scene like? This weekend? Whole weekend, yeah. Sure. Friday we went to happy hour at Griselda's. Not Glizelda's, but Griselda's. You know what?

I've done a brunch there, and it was a fun scene. It is. It's a very good scene. Yeah. It's a very good scene, and we had a lovely time. We went to kind of tropical afterwards, just a spot on the east side over there. There he laid back. Is that the Wilmonds competitor?

It would be a great place for a Wilmonds pop-up. Is that the place with the red light inside? Like it's lit very red? No, no. It's like a former gas station. They have frozen drinks and food. We used to do a segment called that. Yeah.

Anyway, we had a lovely time Friday. And I don't know if you guys heard the news. They call me Uncle Micah now because I got to meet my new niece. Wow. Congratulations. Shouts to Adeline June. Swank. Great name.

Yeah, my sister's new daughter. She is – we got to see her yesterday. I had a little barbecue at my sister's place. It was a lot of stress on me. I'm not going to lie because more pressure than stress. My sister is married to a chef and Ryan has not yet. He is uncomfortable with his grill. He has a charcoal grill,

but he can't figure it out. It's a little different than the model he had before. And so he was like, you've got to grill the hamburgers. He told me this about a week out. This sounds like a test. And his parents were there, and my parents were there, and everyone is very critical about food.

But I delivered. They were perfect burgers. You never had a doubt. Well, I had a lot of doubt, but I made it happen. It felt really good. They've often said that burgers are the most difficult thing to prepare. People have said that. People have said that. People have said that.

And the only other thing I would say is that I also brought this grilled broccoli salad with a tahini dressing. And it was tahini and avocado. It was quite delightful. It was featured in last week's Micah's Read of the Week, the newsletter. How did I know? Available every Monday in your inbox around lunchtime, including today, if i can get it done after this podcast quite delightful he said 49 weeks in a row we're coming up on the the one year anniversary of mike is ready the week the newsletter subscribe for free guys i'm gonna do something we don't do very often i'm gonna i'm gonna give some time to

mike three mike three being randy's mike because uh producer Randy, or video guy Randy, I don't really know what he is, just guy Randy who's wearing a Johnsonville Brought t-shirt today, he's back. He was in Vegas, and I just want to see how that went. I haven't had a chance to talk to him. Just kind of give me a rundown of that whole trip and what happened when you got back. Yeah, you can't spell sausage without USA. Thank you. You want to know everything about Vegas?

No, not really. Just give me like the last hour. Just, all right. So we're talking about my flight and everything. Maybe I get big head on this. So Southwest, I was supposed to be getting back into Austin a little after midnight. I knew it was a late flight. I was fine with it, whatever.

The flight got delayed about three hours, maybe more. I'm not entirely sure. And it wasn't because of weather or something or some type of plane issue. So they did give me a $100 Southwest voucher. Very cool. So that was cool. But left Las Vegas airport later than I was supposed to arrive in Austin. So after midnight, not great.

Baby on the plane just for 30 minutes screaming his head off. That was great. Got to Austin around 3.30 a.m., walked out to the parking lot to a car that had a dead battery. So I did not know what to do. Just sat there for a little while, thought about my decisions in life, just sat there for a little while thought about my decisions in life then call triple a uh triple a has two different apps that they just bounce you back and forth with could not get triple a out there for about two ish hours you should have called triple h maybe that would work uh and then by time triple a said they were supposed to be there, the parking security came by and said, all right, we'll give you a jump. You could have just called us the whole time.

So there's a little, if you ever have a dead battery in an airport parking lot, you could just call the parking authority. I don't want to Monday morning quarterback you, but that would have been one of the first things I did. I tried looking it up, but I couldn't find it. That's probably a fairly common thing that happens when people leave their cars there. I couldn't find it. You know what?

I'm going to give Randy a little bit of benefit of the doubt here. Because I wouldn't have thought about that. In retrospect, it makes perfect sense. I'm sure they've got jumping cables and apparatuses on the ready. Yeah. And I couldn't find a. I thought about it for a second. I gave about like three minutes.

But at 3.30 in the morning, how many security guys are running around? Probably only one. I couldn't find a telephone number. It's the time where you need them. Yeah. So that was fun. But at 3.30 in the morning, how many security guys are running around? Probably only one. I couldn't find a telephone number. That would be the time where you need them. Yeah. So that was fun. So I pretty much just slept in my car for like two hours.

And I finally got a jump. I saw you Thursday morning. Yeah, because at that point it was like 6 o'clock. And I was like, all right, we're going to record listener voicemails at 9.30. So by the time I get back up to my apartment, I'm going to get like, what, 20 minutes of sleep. And then I have to go come back here. So I'm just going to go get McDonald's and then nap in the office. And I wake up at 9.30 to realize listener voicemails already posted that you guys recorded and did not tell me that I did not have to come in Thursday morning. He's not loving it.

So, so I just sat there like everyone came the interns came in and then dave came in we hung out i was actually here before the interns put some respect on my name that was true and then i walked out to my car and the battery was still dead yeah it was tough so i had to come back in here wait for like another hour for triple a to actually come and I need a new battery. It was about, uh, five years old. So I'm happy. It was just the battery. Yeah. So that was, that was fun. Anytime, you know, that starts happening, you start thinking alternator and you're getting up there in the, in the dollar amount, you know, I'm a car guy. I won't get too technical. Randy, do you have any highlights from the weekend in Vegas? Who did you go to Vegas with?

It was for my dad's 70th birthday, so it was a little like family reunion. Sounds fun. You got a good gram off. I saw you were at the P.F. Chang's. Yeah, that is true. That was the birthday dinner. What did you go with? We had lettuce wraps.

The Chang's there. I've eaten at that P.F. Chang's, actually. Oh, yeah? Yeah. In Planet Hollywood? Yes. Very cool. Oh, that's a scene. We had a private room. I've eaten at that P.F. Changs, actually. Oh, yeah? Yeah. In Planet Hollywood? Yes. Very cool. Oh, that's a scene.

We had a private room. Oh, private room? Oh, shit. Wow. I did not get that kind of ball of status. How do you take your Chang sauce? Snort it? What do you mean?

Spicy? Don't snort it. I don't know. My dad ordered everything. It was family style. I don't know. Okay. When you're here, you're family. That's their motto, right? No, that's Wilmont's. My dad ordered everything. It was family style. I don't know. Okay. But it was fun.

When you're here, you're family. That's their motto, right? No, that's Wilmont's. Oh. Otherwise, I had three flat tires on my bike yesterday. Okay. The main water line to my apartment. How many, wait.

How do you have three flat tires on a bicycle? That implies there's only two tires. So I got a flat and then replaced it, immediately got a flat, and then later in the day my front tire got a flat. So, you know. You were just down so bad lately. Yeah. I'm waiting for this audio board to short circuit or something.

Needless to say, I was also down in Vegas gambling, the little gambling I did. We just assumed that. You can look that part out, I think. Well, that's the third bad thing. That's probably a good thing. Which I'm going to need to advance on my next paycheck. Very cool. You better talk to HR.

Very cool. That guy's Twitter account. All right. Thank you, Randy, for that. Thank you. Can you pull up the Zuck thing? We've got to talk Zuck real quick. I don't know if you all saw this.

Oh, I saw it. So Zuck has become kind of a caricature of himself. We don't need the audio. We can watch this. Well, the audio here we should mention is Take Me Home Country Roads. John Denver. The John Denver version. The John Denver classic.

Let me say – well, go ahead, Micah. Oh, should we narrate what's happening here? It's him on a board. Dylan, you're a water sports guy. Tell us about it. I don't know what this board is called. It's a surfboard that's sticking out of the water. It's got a thing that shoots down.

Anyway, it's self-propelled. Self-propelled surfboard, basically, is what it is. Let me say, what's going on here is a pretty cool situation. It's a cool, I don't know what lake that is, but he's on the lake, he's got the surfboard thing, and he's holding the American flag. Looks like Whitney. In itself, it's a cool thing to do, but no one can make this look as dorky as Mark Zuckerberg. It's also like a two-minute long video, which is unnecessary. also like a two minute long video which is unnecessary if if you if zuck just put out a 10 second video hey look at me i'm surfing with an american flag that's good enough you get the

point across like no one needs two minutes of this well he doesn't okay a couple things here he's holding a flag but no one tosses him a beer he doesn't caveman a beer or do anything no shotgun he doesn't dylan a beer dylan was the first to do that. I did invent that. Thank you. I will say he also has a glaring lack of suntan lotion on his face. If you remember the last time he did something like this or was photographed out on the water, his entire face was white. It was. Like whiter than white. And it seems that he's learned from that.

These surfboard things, whatever they're called, is this a hydrofoil? This is not. I don't know. I'm going to speak on it like I know. I don't think it is. Another thing that we're missing here, do you remember how goofy-cheeked up Zuck was in that last photo? Like, he gives us nothing here. Like, he's got good legs.

Yeah, I will say I'm impressed by the inseam on those shorts. Those are appropriate. This is a hydrofoil surfboard, according to my Google search. What's the price point? I'm seeing anywhere from low thousands to up to, I see one on eBay for $8,800, so somewhere in that range. I bet Zuck has the more advanced model. He's probably got the good one, yeah.

This probably has AI interface. And let me say, these look awesome. I want to try this. You know this song is not about West Virginia, right? Right. It's about the western part of Virginia. A lot of people forget that. Oh, I was unfamiliar.

I'm surprised you didn't know that. Who is shooting this video? Are they on a boat? Because there's not a lot of wake. I mean, there is some wake, but there's not a lot. Or is someone else on one of these as well just shooting Zuck? What if it's a drone? Is it his wife? I don't

think it's a drone, because it's pretty... I don't know. It's very confusing. I think it's a boat situation. He's just far enough up that he's avoiding the whole wake. I don't know. Very cool by zuck though but the guy's just next level dork city man yeah um i'm wondering when he officially like goes full

like elon like because you know i mean you talk about billionaires who who do content like like zuck is dipping his toe in he's in. He's done it once or twice. He knows, like, he's highly memeable. Like, for him to do this, is he showing self-awareness? Do we like Zuck now, or are we still... No, he's clearly trying. And he could also, if he was trying, and he is trying, but he's made the calculation that I'm going to shoot this

do-it-yourself style so everybody can upload videos to Facebook that look like this. DIY. DIY, yes. I mean, this isn't the Aubrey Marcus approach where you have a professional camera crew following you when you wake surf, and then you post a really stylized video. That's what Dylan does. Right, right.

Because aesthetics are very important, but I think Zuck is trying to present a more approachable image, which is weird for somebody who is one of the richest men in the world. 62 Bill? Is that the net worth? That's strong. Something like that.

It's many billions. I hate him. I hate his product. Facebook stinks. Get out of here. I hate it. He could probably shut this podcast down if he wanted to. I don't care. In some capacity. Well, capacity i do care but i doubt he could okay you know what i care about

oh go ahead micah no no i was just gonna say it's this is open source rss you're safe here i don't know what that means podcasting terms i do know this though cuts clothing oh big big fan okay the sport of business means demanding excellence. From your craft and your wardrobe, your fits need to be versatile, blending timeless style and comfort so that you look as good as you feel. For that, this cuts clothing, Dylan. They've taken a classic men's fashion staple, the plain tee, and refined it, combining premium quality with a minimalist aesthetic. How about that?

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He's a major cuts guy. And he's not even cool Randy. Cool Adam probably wears cuts. Take a plain tee, but make it, oh, I don't know, Tony Stark? Freaking Iron Man, dude. The bleeding edge of fabric technology meets the man confident enough to wear it. Cuts, clothing. We're big fans.

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a lifestyle. It's not just clothing. It's office leisure apparel for the sport of business. Get 15% off your first order by going to cutsclothing.com slash steam. That's cutsclothing.com slash steam for 15% off. It's the only shirt worth wearing. The hogs have gone radioactive. Radioactive. We got ourselves a problem. Radioactive. There it is.

Wow. This is so hard to say. We've got sound effects. What's up with these hogs, Dave? So do you guys remember the disaster the disaster at fukushima while back when i actually do not 2011 the partial the partial nuclear meltdown how do you not remember that we had tsunami we had the the meltdown big deal those are all around the same time oh it was because of the tsunami right okay it's it's It's coming back to me. Well, we now have Per Source's indestructible radioactive hybrid terror pigs, which leads me to wonder, in the animal kingdom, which animals do you want to go radioactive the least? I think hogs are up there because hogs are already a menace.

We've talked about this hundreds of times on this podcast. We know they're a problem. They're everywhere. The Japanese hog is a problem. It's a problem here in Texas. Not necessarily the Japanese hog, but who knows? They're radioactive. So are these radioactive feral hogs?

They are. And they're breeding with domestic ones that escaped. Oh, Christ. There's like this whole exclusion zone. We've got a problem. And they're... Oh, my gosh. Are you looking at them

are you checking out the hogs okay so here i'll just read this paragraph it's talking about how they have uh mated with uh like you said the domestic pigs the result was a new kind of boar pig hybrid that originated in the initial exclusion exclusion zone within 20 kilometers of the site of the nuclear plant where where radiation levels were presumably highest. The study found that the hybrids did not display any signs of mutation despite the doses of radiation they were subjected to. Indeed, surveys of the local boar population found that they are contaminated by up to 300 times the safe human dosage of the lethal isotope casein-137.

In other words, they are highly radioactive and seemingly virtually indestructible. Holy shnikes. Indestructible, radioactive pigs. Just an absolute problem. Just menacing the countryside. I want to know what makes them virtually indestructible. So I think that might be a little hyperbole i mean like i i feel like a well-placed um like 50 caliber bullet might do the trick um oh even like the hogs you're gonna find in on your ranch or something like they're not going down

with just like a you know like a little 22 right you've got to put one in their dome with something powerful, right? Pretty much, yeah. I mean, a.22 to the body won't take one down. No. It's not even going to slow it. No, and the fact of the matter is they're usually traveling in packs of 30 to 50. We know that to be true. It says that they're having to bring in kill teams to go after these things because you can't live in this area.

In fact, I don't know how this works. Like with Chernobyl, you saw this in their exclusion zone. You couldn't just go back there and create a settlement and rebuild everything. You had to wait a mountain of time. Yeah, they're sending in full-on kill squads, which I would love to know. Sheesh, man. Like SEAL Team 6 going in there to catch some bodies going full

black ops but yeah i don't know man i don't i'm like this obviously like the answer is like bears and you don't want bears to go radioactive but i think hogs are so they're already so elusive and hard to kill like those things going radioactive is a problem right right no i get it i just i'm just kind of i'm still confused about like if you put if you put a bullet in its head it's going down yeah it's not like they're like yeah yeah i think so i think there's a little bit of exaggeration well i mean i i think it's indestructible for outside of humans with weapons you're not going to win a knife fight against a radio and i don't think that there's any other predators out there that are taking down radioactive hogs.

Do they have any natural predators? I think they're indestructible. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. I don't think there's a predator out there. A big cat could probably take one down. Oh, absolutely. I don't think mountain lions are attacking these guys. They don't see the menace that is the radioactive hog.

The problem is you're not going to catch just one hog. You're going to get multiple hogs. Well, like 30 to 50 of them. Got to catch them all. At least. Got to catch them all. Yeah, this is is kind of wild i don't know man like i feel like every five years something pops up about feral hogs in texas i mean like we've talked about this before i mean we could literally go pay somebody to go up in a helicopter on their ranch and they just go go after them with like a you know massive artillery and weaponry.

I'm wondering if they're going to have to go pull out the heli in Japan to weed these things out. I don't know. They're more aggressive, too, is what it's saying here. You don't like that. Speaking of aggressive, can we talk about grilling his bad guy? Can you pull up that tweet, Randy? So normally we we

don't pay a lot of attention actually though who am I kidding we always pay attention to click how's this ratio looking this is something we did on post-grad problems and probably tfm2 back in the day we would post something just to get clicks specifically before like a holiday or a time on the calendar that we knew would be particularly inflammatory. This is Josh Barrow, at Jay Barrow on Twitter, who is a journalist of some sort, I think a podcast host. He writes for Business Insider, which, by the way, is behind a paywall, this specific article.

Yeah, just so we're clear, Business Insider will publish anyone, I believe. It's not hard. This is not a credential. Ooh, I'm published at Business Insider is this kind of like submitting an article to Gawker about how Papa John's is the pizza place in Chicago business insider probably pay you though they're like fuck it we're going down anyway miles to run this story Gawker still owes curry money yeah but I believe business insider doing quite well it seems like doing well they're behind a paywall

there must be people willing to pay for it. So, yeah. Let me get the ratio out of the way real quick. He's currently sitting on 663 retweets and 13,800 quote tweets. So, not the ratio you're looking for. This was just a dunk fest on Twitter. This made its way around Grill Guy, meat smokers only Twitter very quickly. His tweet says, it's a link to his column.

His column is, admit it, grilling is bad. And his tweet says, your grill is filthy, has poor temperature control, and for some idiot reason has the heating element below the food. So fat drips into it and catches fire. There's a better way to cook in your kitchen. Micah, you're a sous vide guy. You are like the original sous vide guy. Sure, sure. I'm wondering what your thoughts are, because I know you dabble, you mentioned earlier,

you know your way around a charcoal grill. What is your preferred method? Oh, it depends on the product you're trying to grill, obviously, David. But the sous vide is, I won't say cheating, but it can be a valuable tool in a grilling situation, especially for large chunks of meat. Although I haven't used my sous vide in a very long time. A ripping hot grill is the preferred method, something just stupid hot. And there are stupid hot grills. I have that problem with my uh my pellet smoker i can only get it yeah that's the only problem 450 460 on a good day yeah you need you really want to get

500 or up if you're doing the sear method especially the reverse sear um i don't know man i i again this thing was behind a paywall and i was like dude i'm not giving i'm not giving business insider my business right now. I'm just not. But let me say – Our friends at Fox News, your friends at Fox News, Micah, they've done a nice write-up, and they've included a number of responses. One, you guys – Before you get to those, though, I will say I clicked on the Business Insider link, and before the paywall thing popped up, there is this photo of grilled meats.

And the caption is really the best part of the whole thing that I saw because it disappeared, obviously. It said, the wrong way to cook these meats. And it's just a photo of a lot of meats grilling. That is too much meat on the grill. Well, that may be true, too, but the wrong way to cook these meats. That's preposterous. Randy is wearing a Johnsonville shirt. Brats need the smoke. They need to be these meats. That's preposterous. Randy is wearing a Johnsonville shirt. Brats need, they need the smoke.

They need to be cooked outdoors. Yeah, that's what he's seemingly forgetting here is that the flavor you get from a grill is unmatched. That's right. Right? And it's fun. And it's fun. Yeah, it's an event.

And we'll get to what this guy actually said, but you can't you can't uh dismiss the the human need to be around fire and grilled meat there's something that there's a there's a primitive it's like the umami of life of uh especially for men i've said that yeah there's there's a special appeal to it no there definitely is definitely is. And the fact that, like, dude, when's the last time you tried to do a steak in your kitchen? Like on a cast iron. And it didn't end up setting off every smoke detector in your apartment or in your house. Unless you have an industrial-grade hood in your home, and no one does, you can't sear a steak properly.

The ones that you have in your apartment or your house, just your basic kitchen, I have always thought they don't do anything. They just make noise. No. I, and I think, I think most of them just recirculate. They just move the smoke from one end of your house to the other. I can't tell you how many times, and we have not tried this in the new house, but we would, I would try to do reverse sear. And like I alluded, I mentioned like the, the Traeger doesn't get hot enough. So I would try do it i would smoke it and then i would bring it in and try to sear it next thing you know i'm shirtless waving my shirt like at the smoke detector like a goon my wife comes down like what what the fuck's going on we've all been there yeah we have it's not great uh and dude the thought of doing like anybody who prefers like a brat done in a kitchen to a grill, that is probably the most egregious part of this entire thing.

You have to have the grill marks. You have to have a grilled brat. Is he just on the stove just rolling that thing around in a pan? What is he doing? Yeah, I think so. And it browns up your pan. It's just a problem. There are some quotes from—we'll start with the quotes from him before we get to the Twitter feedback.

Who doesn't like a backyard barbecue? Me. That's who, he wrote. There's a reason you do most of your cooking inside. Grills are impossible to keep clean. They lack good temperature control, and they make worse food than what you can prepare in your kitchen. Okay. So if he, okay, if he stuck to making a case about how it was cleaner and easier. Probably healthier.

He could have gotten away with this a little bit better. But to try and say that it tastes better and also you make better food, that's just, that's just objectively wrong. Well, and he grossly downplays like how easy it is to clean your grill grills. Yes, grill management is important. Yeah. And he writes, celebrate American prosperity with your fine kitchen appliances and make food for the cookout indoors. Your grill is filthy.

The first time you use a grill, it is delightfully clean. Then food touches it. Grills run at high heat and food burns onto the grates. Like pots and pans, burned-on food heat and food burns onto the grates like pots and pans. Burned on food is tough to remove from grill grates. It's not that tough. And if you properly lubricate your grill, in fact, it will be, this is outrageous. This is a bad take.

Micah, you do work on the apartment grill, the community grill. And I keep it clean. I keep it hot, keep it clean. Keep it lubricated. Yeah, it's remarkable. It is remarkable. Oh, and dude, and let's not even get started on, like, he doesn't even mention vegetables. Like, vegetables are objectively better when smoked or grilled.

Always, sure. Than when just chopped up and done in a skillet, in my opinion. I don't know. He doesn't go out smokers in this article, does he? You know, again, it was behind a paywall, and I wasn't going to give them my hate subscription, although I bet many people did.

And I have to say, like, if that was his goal, which I'm sure it was, as he works for Business Insider, mission accomplished. This did the job. This is right out of the PGP playbook. Just strong opinion, great title. Get the reaction. Get the quote tweets. Go viral.

My favorite part is that he called it stupid that grills have a heating element underneath the food because he's alarmed by grease that would possibly drip down and cause a flare-up. And he wrote that a broiler is a superior tool. Quote, you secretly agree with me about grilling. You may talk a good game about how you'd like to grill but where do you do most of your cooking almost surely in the kitchen where cooking is easier and cleaner and produces more consistent results josh borrow you son of a bitch you beautiful son of a bitch you're doing numbers sir you're doing numbers you got a hell of a

following man he's got a big following. Which I found to be quite upsetting. I mean, what are the chances that this is 100% a troll? I'd say probably. Actually, you know what? Did you see his follow-up tweet? He's been on this hill for a while. Yeah, in May of 2019.

Well, Jared's been on the Gangnam Style tweet for a long time, too. Just because it's a long con doesn't mean it's not a con. Okay. But I like that you somehow worked in the worst tweet in the history of Twitter. Thank you. Thank you. I don't have anything else to say about this doofus. Do you guys want to talk about the tweets roasting this bozo? Yeah, I just want to talk about the the tweets roasting this bozo

yeah i just want to talk about the fact that ian rapaport is not happy rap is rap sheets not excited he says i feel like i'm a professional at ignoring horrible takes but i cannot ignore this maybe the worst take i've ever seen on any subject grilling is awesome go away kitchen guy go away kitchen guy okay rap i mean it is a missed is a missed opportunity for Josh not to rebrand his Instagram as Kitchen Guy. Kitchen Guy is a good nickname. It's a good nickname. That's a YouTube channel that has many subscribers if you would just do it. Yeah, everybody's just hate posting or hate responding, posting their perfectly smoked meats.

I won't show them what I put together last week, my failure of a burger. But, yeah, this is preposterous. Mission accomplished. I'm very happy that you went viral. I would have hired you and paid you $25 a column about five years ago on PGP. So thank you, Jay Barrow. Hey, polarization wins in editorial. It always does.

In the attention economy, yeah. You know who's the best at this was Duda. Yeah. Duda and Will were like 1A, 1B, really good at this. Well, Curry was the goat, really. Okay, Curry was very good. Was Curry goated? The Curry Papa Johns, if you don't know this,

we had an intern named Curry for a while over on the TFM side. And in the dying days of Gawker, Gawker Media, he snuck one in. He emailed them and was like, hey, can I write a column about the best pizza in Chicago? And they're like, yeah, why not? They knew they were all about to get severance packages, hopefully. And Curry wrote one about Papa John's being the best pizza in Chicago. It's entitled, Papa John's Pizza is the Best Pizza in Chicago. Is there an editor's note?

I thought I recall seeing an editor's note. It said, like, this guy just emailed this and wanted to write that. It was just like, yeah. It says, quote, Curry Schaaf is a guy who emailed tips earlier today asking if he could write about why Papa John's is the best pizza in Chicago. We said yes. Okay.

And of course, Ross's Stop CrossFit is another example of the polarization angle. Can I just note that Curry never got paid on that Gawker column? I think he still owed $50. Is it $50? Wow, they paid well. They paid more than we did. Yeah, the Stop CrossFit was all time. That's the one thing.

I think that helped launch Post Grab Problems' website. It did. That was in the glory days of Chartbeat. We would just sit there and instead of doing stuff to market a column that was going viral, we would just sit there for an hour and just watch Chartbeat and be like, dude, look at it. The CrossFit culture is very strong.

Yeah. They don't play. They don't play. They were very – CrossFit corporate was very like, aha, this is funny, guys. And then we tried – well, I wasn't with the company at the time, but they believed that there was a shirt that was trying to be sold to capitalize on it, and then they hit us with a, aha, we're going to hit you with a cease and desist.

So we didn't sell the shirt. But they kind of tongue-in-cheek acted like they enjoyed it. You know what CrossFit is. Speaking of CrossFit, you know you can wear Raycon while you CrossFit? You can wear Raycon when you do anything. Travel, work out, just hang out. Some of the best headphones in the world, my favorite headphones, I wear them every time I work out, whether it's for work or play.

A lot of us are going to be on the move again this summer. So my advice to you, take your Raycons with you, Micah. Sure. You know what Will was just telling us about his Raycons? I think it was Will. The battery. The battery situation. He said he hadn't charged them in like three months.

No. And he uses them regularly, and they just won't die. Yeah, I think they tell you like six hours, but it feels like longer than that. Oh, they've got a 24-hour battery life. Excuse me. Well, that's probably why. And they're portable. They come in a nice little pill case.

They're crisp. The powerful beats. It's got great bass. Underrated bass. I've had wireless headphones in the past that they just all I'm hearing is the treb. You know I'm not a treble guy. You're all bass. I need to hear the 808s.

And Raycon delivers. They look great. They feel even better. They come in a range of cool colors with customizable gel tips included for comfortable in-ear fit. That's underrated, by the way, because I've got the two different size ear canals or whatever. You're a small ear guy. Small, got weird ears. I'm a weird ear guy.

I'm not afraid to say it. So, yeah, the customizable gel tips are huge for me i love raycon they don't pop out when i'm jumping rope when i'm hitting the heavy bag like i always do you know every day catch me in there just working it you see me in there i'm not once you hit it you hit the heavy bag every day every day dude i just he walks by it on his way to like the the leg press and he just he taps it gives it a little pat. Yeah, I'm scared to go full out. There's some guys who put in work, and you know what, though? They look good doing it.

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Buyraycon.com slash steam. Very cool. Dave. So last night was the 4th. Yesterday was the 4th. Your first fireworks situation with a young lad in the house. And, of course, you have Randy as well. How did it go for you?

So we were in Houston. We did a day trip to Houston to see some of my wife's family. Drove back last night, got in probably as the sun – actually, yeah, when the sun was setting and his fireworks were starting to go off, we had a great view. It was perfect driving in on 290 at that time. But something that came up, everybody knows, I've talked about it before, Randy, my dog, who is now three, over the last year and a half, two years,

he has developed a, like many dogs, he's definitely afraid of fireworks. Thunder he's curious about, but he is scared of fireworks. He gets very protective. So I was very interested to see how this worked with Rhodes, my son, who is five months old. He sleeps with the—he's got the— White noise machine. White noise machine, which blocks out pretty much everything. These things are clutch.

Yeah, they're very clutch. And I was wondering what was going to happen like with him is he gonna you know because they're our neighborhood we moved into a new neighborhood a couple weeks ago and let me just say southwest austin is lit on the fourth of july oh yeah like it is a scene like multiple neighbors doing the big boy artillery shells roman candles i think i heard some uh some saturn missiles one of my all-time favorites, a little cube that just shoots like 60 missiles out. Hell yeah. Let's go.

It was a scene. Was Next Door just popping last night? Next Door was popping. A lot of condescending stuff. A lot of people saying, bring your pets inside. Next Door is Super Bowl. It is the Super Bowl. Gunshots or fireworks.

Yeah. So Randy, we doped him up on our way back with uh some of the dogs annex you ever give charlie into the dogs hands uh i think we she got a script for it when we traveled with her but we we don't use it recreationally okay good good well we hit or allow her to do so we hit randy with some just you you know, fireworks, chill him out. Maybe it's because Randy's 87 pounds, but, like, it didn't really work. But we had a mega cute scene. So we get back around 9.

It's Rhodes' bedtime, so we're trying to put him down in the nursery. So Randy, hearing all these fireworks, normally he would come over to me and, like, sit, like, over to me and like sit like right near me and like kind of lean on me uh instead of that he's in the nursery and he will not leave the baby's side uh and when we put roads in the crib to lay him down he would not leave the nursery okay so that is mega cute we get him out of there finally and then shut the door. He lays down right outside of Rhodes' nursery and won't move. So I'm assuming that's being protective. Absolutely.

He's never done this before. He normally just hangs out with us. He doesn't particularly want to hang out in the nursery. Our dog's just the best thing ever. That is absolutely what's going on there. Dude, I was almost crying. I was like, dude, this is the sweetest thing I've ever seen. Stella, who's never been around um infants before my my sister now has one

shouts to quinn and uh congratulations by the way being an uncle thank you it's it's a big moment for for me personally anyway so we'll just go like sit at her like when when hayley is feeding quinn just go set her feet and just kind of watch over her, make sure everything's cool. Dogs, man. Dude, dogs be like that. Dogs are just the best. Did your dog do anything cute? No, she's just scared.

God dang it, Micah. Yeah. Give us a cute scene. She hopped in the bed and just wanted to snuggle. Snuggle. We didn't allow our dog to snuggle for the first year that we had her. And then when the pandemic, or not the pandemic, when the winter storm hit. You guys remember the winter storm, right?

Yeah, noted freeze in Austin. You know why, right? Because of the windmills. Right. So the green energy. We lost power for four days, and Charlie then got to spend some time in the bed with us for warmth. And there's no going back after that. And so she spent a lot of time cuddled up with us last night.

That's beautiful. It was. It was really quite sweet. Yeah, I'm lucky. Stella, she handles the fireworks pretty well. We have nice blinds, soundproof blinds in our room, so it's more quiet in there. Because I walked out into the living room, and you could hear.

I mean, it was lit, as they say, last night. I got to say, I as a kid and even to this day, I love I like fireworks quite a bit. Like I haven't gone to a fire stand and acquired fireworks in a few years, but it's something I like to do. I'm trying not to be the old man yelling at the cloud, but I feel like it's probably customary. It should be kind of a unwritten rule or maybe even a rule because you're technically not even supposed to do fireworks in city limits of Austin, but people do them anyway and nobody enforces anything. If you call 911, they'll probably laugh at you. I'm not saying be a narc. We don't do that. I don't think 911 is the proper channel for that. It's probably 311.

Probably not. Although there were some homes that were burned down last night. There always are. People probably lost fingers last night. Probably. Shots of JPP. Let me say, if you're the dude in your neighborhood and you're doing the artillery shells, you're doing the big boy fireworks, or any fireworks really, what if you stop at midnight?

What if you stopped? That'd be smart. How late do they go in your neighborhood? I woke up to get some water at about 2.30, and I heard a phantom Roman candle. Oh, my gosh. Because I know the sound of the Roman candle. Yeah, someone who shot their peers as a youngster. Roman candle fight.

Right. I never saw a Roman candle fight I didn't want to be in. I was asleep by like 10.45 last night. It was a good night for me. Yeah, I just feel like it's not asking too much that maybe maybe like maybe you wind it down at 11. dude before we know you're gonna be on next door just like giving it to people well i i did i was opening next door and refreshing just to kind of see just kind of hoping that somebody was on there like threatening to call police because i thought maybe that would be a deterrent yeah but the kind of person who's shooting off fireworks at 2 o'clock in the morning

is not on the Nextdoor app. You think they've been drinking? They're just punk kids. Yeah. Yeah, of course. And look, I was the kid probably setting off fireworks at 2 a.m. on a Monday morning. And now you're a zaddy. And now I'm a zaddy and a dog owner and an uncle.

Dog zaddy. Dude, think about all the uncles out there. Yeah. You got to consider all of them. Did y'all do any fireworks? Any fireworks at the ranch? At the ranch we did. Yeah, you got to consider all of them. Did you all do any fireworks? Any fireworks at the ranch? At the ranch we did, yeah. What's your firework of choice?

You can go all night at the ranch. Oh, yeah, it's a free-for-all out there. It's a wild, wild west. My stepdad acquired all the fireworks for the evening. I'm not sure. The big tank one, you know? Oh, yeah. The tank that shoots out of the, you know, it was tight.

That was the big boy, the finale. Stuff flies out of it. Did you ever have the boat as a kid that you could, like, you just put it in, like, a kiddie pool or something, and it just shot, and it looked like a... No, that's pretty cool. That sounds tight. It was, but, like, oftentimes it failed to deliver. You know, it was like, well, I'm putting this firework in water. Of course it's not going to work.

Water and fireworks, not a great mix. They don't mix. They don't mix. They don't mix. Light fuse, get away. That's the key. I don't know, man. I've thought about it. In the past, you go in there with like 50 bucks and you do some damage.

Now you can go in there with like 100 bucks and get one of those just variety packs. And it comes with almost like one of each of literally every firework. I kind of have some FOMO that we didn't do that. Because where we were, we were in a northern suburb of Houston. That neighborhood, they were popping off. They were popping off. And I was like, man, I kind of wish I had been in on that. But I don't know.

I was too busy worrying about getting home in time to get the kid down. But what I'm saying is you need to invite us out to the ranch so we can do fireworks. Okay. We can make that happen. Thank you. New Year's eve is not too far away well it kind of is actually but that's the next that's the next big one you know i don't think i've ever done fireworks on new year's eve i haven't either i usually just go out and let the tuli sing a little bit just straight up into the air wait on new year's eve you take your pistol outside yeah and you just fire it into the air? Yeah, just kind of a celebration.

Was it your 1932 Smith & Wesson, whatever that thing is? Desert Eagle. You take a.50 caliber pistol outside? Right. It's very loud. I don't do it in city limits normally. Have you fired one of those? Yes.

I have two. My ears are still ringing from it. The first gun i fired my buddy's dad was taking us to his place in may pearl and uh he's like hey i got this he's kind of a wild ass he's like i got this 357 magnum he's like y'all want to shoot it off this bridge we're like uh okay i'd never shot a gun and it it was by far way too much firepower for a 10 year old and uh yeah i've never shot anything. I guess the Desert Eagle probably had as much.

I guess it's a.50 cal, so of course it did. Oh, Desert Eagle, I mean, it's like you're up here with it. Why do I know somebody who has a Desert Eagle? That's the real question here. I don't even remember whose it was. I don't know, man. What about you? They're not super necessary i i have not shot a desert eagle okay but i would if i knew someone who had one and i'm sure i do know someone who has one

maybe we'll bring it to the ranch you think robert sarver has one you know what i'm not going to speculate about robert sarver i don't really understand anything about robert sar, truth be told. I need you to break this down because you hit me with this. You and I are both followers of True Hoop. Yes. Avid readers of True Hoop. And an unmissable newsletter.

Great newsletter. Inspired mind of Mike, I many say. But this funeral— You know, there's video of this, too. I'll set the scene here. Yeah, what's going on here? I'm trying to catch up. Okay, True Hoop is a daily news...

It's maybe a multiple-time-a-week newsletter on Substack, the same place where you can find Mike as Read of the Week, the newsletter. And Glenn Greenwald. Sure. And so often they do in-deep reporting, in-depth reporting, I should say. It's mostly about basketball, but there were a lot of pieces that Dave and I have sent back and forth about the NBA's relationship with billionaires and how quickly you can get to Epstein. It's a real – everybody's within three degrees. It's pretty wild.

And I am not much – everyone knows that I'm very anti-conspiracy theory, but the reporting has been excellent. Anyway, sometimes they just talk about X's and O's. But they got my attention July 2nd when there was an email that went out that said, video, Robert Sarver at a memorial service. And tell everybody who Robert Sarver is. Robert Sarver is the owner of the Phoenix Suns. And for those of you who aren't basketball fans, they are in the NBA Finals for the first time since 93, I think, when Charles Barkley lost to Michael Jordan. It's their first time in the playoffs in 10 years. Robert Sarver is universally seen as one of the worst owners in sports, especially in the NBA.

But his team is on a precipice of a championship. They may be favored. I don't know. They are the favorites. Are they the favorites? At this point. And they are quite good. So it's a big moment for Robert Sarver.

He also owns the WNBA's Phoenix Mercury. I didn't know that. Yeah. So this piece starts. It's written by Henry Abbott, and it says, Note, this post contains language that many will find offensive. It's always a good way to start. Basically, one of the minority owners of the Phoenix Suns was a CEO named Richard Dick Heckman, who died last Halloween after suffering an ALS-like degenerative condition.

Many people in the Suns were crushed, he says. He was a larger-than-life figure who had been part of the ownership group since 2004. He sat courtside. This was someone who people liked. Because of the COVID lockdown, the family didn't immediately invite people over to remember Dick. It was Saturday, April 17th, 2021, when his widow opened her home to family and friends. Heckman left a lot of family. He and his wife had two daughters.

With his ex-wife, he raised five children and had nine grandchildren. This guy got after it. Yeah, apparently big time, according to Sarver. Was not living on the edge. Yeah, and just from his obituary, this demonstrates the kind of person this guy probably was or wanted to be remembered as. Dick would say his greatest achievement was his close-knit family that he leaves behind. So he's a family man first. Okay.

He's being buried at Arlington National Cemetery. Very cool. So this, you know, it's good to have money, I guess. So Sarver delivered what is kind of, I guess, a eulogy, right? Yeah. Why is this a story? He was there to honor his friend that day. Can I read an excerpt?

Sure. This is what Sarver had to say about Heckman, who was a, I guess, a minority owner of the Suns and one of his dear friends who passed away. He said, Speaking of, someone said he left his DNA. He did leave his DNA in Steve Nash's sock somewhere in the locker room. That was about the third week after we bought the team. Wait a minute. So am I to believe that this man has done that in Steve Nash's sock?

That's exactly what he's saying. That's what the owner of the team said. And this is a eulogy, correct? This is at least a memorial service. I think I know why you were taking so long to get to this, because you wanted Dylan to read it. No, no. Because you don't want to get clipped by Timo.

I was afraid I was going to get clipped. But wow. Wow, there's more, though. This is supposed to be like a touching tribute to the man's life. His kids are going to be watching this. This is in front of friends and family the piece says despite this being a memorial service the portion of sarver's talk uh never strays far from the subject of sex at times he seems to be speaking to heckman's sons directly which here we go yeah any uh that was right about

when he bought the boat so the boat you know where the boat was a bordello when he bought the boat. So right there, you know where this is going. The boat was a bordello. When there's a boat involved. That's not good. We know, was it the Vikings? Yes, yes, the love boat. I mean, let's be honest about it. The boys used to park that thing off the beach there at Cabo. There was, what was that, the office?

They'd park that thing off the office at Cabo, and they'd come in bring them back of course dick dick took great pleasure in knowing that he could get the girls before you guys could i mean he really took pleasure in that that he could outmaneuver you guys his sons of course he's talking about his literal sons not the phoenix sons he's talking about his his uh his own flesh and blood outmaneuvering them with the ladies. Yeah. It's an interesting thing. He also told a story about bringing some children onto the boat and these children seeing things they probably shouldn't have seen. Yeah, like he opens a bedroom door and there's a two-on-one going on, which I think he's referring to a menage a trois.

A three-way. I say, I think it's probably a good idea we get the kids off the boat. Never went on the boat after that. I say, I think it's probably a good idea we get the kids off the boat. Never went on the boat after that. So he's just, he's already been buried, but he's burying them a second time for shits and gigs seemingly. I've got a rule, and it's to never bring, never go on a billionaire's boat.

I'll just say that. You think there's some unruly things going on? Yeah, generally speaking. Could be. Like, you're not going to catch me on the Bravo Eugenia. You're not catching me on Jerry's yacht, even though he might be doing the draft from the yacht which is not talked about enough by the way kind of a flex back major flex major flex yeah shouts i have a rule too uh you may never go on a billionaire's boat uh robert sarver if you're listening you were banned from my memorial service okay i'm glad

you brought that up is there anything like uh god forbid something happens to you yeah anything that you don't want me bringing up like i mean can i at least take can i take some shots at your producer credentials like we do uh often i mean i i i'm not a fan of the memorial service roast personally i i find a little bit distasteful. You want touching tributes only. It has to be tasteful, though. I mean, this isn't like, it's one thing if we're at a bachelor party or if we're at a wedding and you're giving a speech or the rehearsal dinner. Anything sex or sex adjacent is, I think, should be off limits when delivering a eulogy or any kind of memorial toast.

Yeah, save that for when you and the boys are at the bar. Yeah. You know what? You could have this conversation. Just have it with the Suns. Not the Phoenix Suns, but the Suns. Confusingly. Yes.

No, this is bad. You don't want this to go viral. Well, we got bread here, man. Like, Dylan, I'm going to tell you, I'm not going to bring up, God forbid something happens to you when you did doo-doo your pants on a road trip with the lads. I won't bring that up. See, I would think that's fair game, Dave. Go ahead.

You can talk about that. Yeah, but is that what we want you to be remembered by? No. But you know what? When I'm dead, I probably won't care a whole lot. I mean, this guy who's dead is getting more clout. I've never heard of him before this. I didn't know who this guy was until this moment.

You know, a viral moment at a memorial service does raise your clout level. Yeah. You know, a good place to talk about this kind of stuff, these stories, is around the solo stove. Wow. Oh, do you guys have solo stoves? We do. Oh, my God. There's something that feels magic about summer nights, man.

Micah? I do not have a solar stove. That is truly embarrassing. Wow, what an idiot. I do live in an apartment complex where this is probably illegal. That's okay. You got that grill right out back there. They're going to learn today.

Maybe it's those gentle breezes, symphonies of animals and insects, or the warming glow of a campfire. I think it's the latter, personally. You're trying to act like I didn't fire mine up with my son and we didn't roast marshmallows over this thing. Did did you did y'all do s'mores or just the straight up roast we did we did s'mores but he was he's more of just a just a marshmallow kind of guy day or night a smokeless fire pit from solo stove turns magical summer moments into unforgettable memories you're probably thinking oh they bill it as smokeless it's probably some

kind of like pulling over on us there's no way it's not no fire produces smoke uh this thing works man it's it as somebody who i've got very sensitive nose sensitive nose allergies and stuff i hate breathing in the smoke i hate smelling like smoke i hate having to like go to a campfire then like oh i have to shower before bed because my entire all my bedding is going to smell like smoke uh i i hate that and that's why i am a solo stove guy i've got it set up in the in the new backyard dylan uh brett can't wait to hear now wait for that invite gonna have to have you come over one day we're gonna have to just make some memories of our own no one forgets their time at summer camp the friendships the activities and most importantly the s'mores dylan but cleaning up the campfire it was messy

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Again, solostove.com, promo code STEAM. Brett, you're going to have to fill in for Micah because he just walked out. Like in his old times. In true Micah fashion, leaving. He didn't slam the door this time, so you've got to give him props for that. Has he thrown anything in a garbage can yet? Not yet. No?

For old times' sake, I kind of want him to. That's true. That's true. What do we have in breaking news, man? We have some fun stuff here. Hop in. You want to talk about that guy's ass? We can.

Have you guys talked about it? We touched on it. I was kind of saving it for you. Yeah. You are the proprietor of this ass. It was a phenomenal ass. Any chance he has some kind of saving it for you yeah you are the you're the proprietor of this ass it was a phenomenal any chance he has some kind of prosthetic back there like it has to be has to be a chance i mean it was it was too it was too ridiculously round you know you don't see shit like that brett was at dirty bills over the weekend and uh they are all the way back but they're

all the way back and uh he he's he snuck a shot of this guy who was just posted up at the bar, bellied up with just all the ass. I can't even – I think you responded on Twitter, too. Wow. For old time's sake. Are you kidding me? You know what? That's perfect.

That's fantastic. That's so disrespectful to the random. We were just talking about this. I hadn't done it yet, and I kind of wanted to for old time's sake. You come in here, you do it, and you say it's for old time's sake. Double homicide with the liquid death, by the way. Number two for the whiner man. Am I pulling a double homie right now?

I love liquid death. Shouts to everybody murdering their thirst. No, it did not. Speaking of, Dirty Bills has liquid death in there behind the bar. Who doesn't at this point? That does not shock me. So tell me more about this guy's ass. Yeah, so I'm sitting there with Intern Klein and Sigurds, and this guy comes walking by.

Wife beater tucked into, like, dress slacks with an A&M class of 88 hat on. Absolutely no one is dressing that way. Flow for days and an ass that i've never seen it was the nicest ass in the in the bar it was god tier god tier it was goaded and just klein goes oh my god and i'm like yep wow and i can see him saying that too yeah yeah and so i i had to document the i'm sorry that you had your girlfriends with you man i'm sure they were like just like breading ain't shit. Were girls talking to this dude, like walking up to him? No, nobody was talking to this dude besides his boy.

He's too intimidating. You can't approach a guy like that. Yeah, he's an unapproachable ass. Right. Yeah. Goodness gracious. He went about his business and just kind of hung out with his buddy at the bar. You know who's been real quiet since we've been talking about the ass?

Yeah, Randy. Randy. Yeah. He's so intimidated by this guy. Sorry, dude. Who wouldn't be? Suddenly, no. Randy? Yeah. He's so intimidated by this guy. Sorry, dude. Who wouldn't be? Suddenly, no one's talking about Randy's dumper. This dude looks like the fake Tom Cruise ass in that movie.

It's exactly what it looks like. Yes. So. If this guy does video, let us know. He wants to get into the podcast game. We might have an opening. I was hoping he was going to be like, yo, what's up? Big fan of the pod type of thing.

We could get a positive identification. You would have said, I'm a big fan of that ass. Yeah, I would have. I would have been like, that's an incredible ass. Is that real? What were the girls saying? They were as dumbfounded as we were. They were like, I kind of want to just give it a little boop.

He's just dummy thick. He was. It's available on Twitter for the time being. It is. Other than this guy's just bodacious booty, as Dylan would say. Do you have any breaking news? I do, Dave. Would you like to go one of three routes?

The Russian alcohol industry, super volcanoes, or oceans on fire? Does Russia do anything other than vodka? Well, yeah. Let's start there because I think this might be the only positive one. Sure. Well, yeah. Let's start there because I think this might be the only positive one. Sure.

I guess you want to call it the ministry of whatever in Russia. Culture? Has signed a law, and more specifically Vladimir Putin has signed a law on Friday that requires all foreign producers of champagne to call it sparkling wine. So there's no champagne allowed in Russia anymore. It's sparkling wine. How does that make you feel? Unless it's produced domestically. Then it can still be called Chapinskoye.

What the heck? Are they saying that they are the originator of the beverage? I don't understand here. It's hard to say. This is just very nationalistic. Isn't champagne one of those liquors that are alcohols that is only allowed to be called champagne if it comes from the Champagne region of France? I believe that's correct. That's why it's called sparkling wine in the United States.

Right. Or Prosecco in Italy, Dave. I prefer Prosecco personally, but that's just a subjective thing. I don't care. So how is Putin doing this? Saying that if it's made in Russia, it's now champagne. The guy kind of makes his own rules. He's just cucking the champagne region.

There could be actual champagne from champagne imported to Russia. You would have to call it sparkling wine. Correct. But I could make, if I was a Russian making sparkling wine in my bathtub, I could call that champagne. Correct. Well, that doesn't make a whole lot of sense. Well, he makes his own rules, Micah.

He's kind of a crazy man. He also looks like our host here. He does not have a mustache. He doesn't have a mustache, yeah. Yeah, good try. He should grow one. He looks good with his shirt off, too, just like Dave. He looks okay.

I mean, look for an older guy. He looks okay. He likes having his shirt off. I mean, look for an older guy. He looks okay. He likes having his shirt off. Of all the things Putin has done in the last couple years, this is possibly my favorite. He's kind of toying with it at this point.

This is just stirring up a little, just some drama. That's one of his buddies. He's like, hey, can we call our shit champagne? He's like, yeah, yeah, I got you. I like that move. Friday news dump. He's like, no. can we call our shit champagne? He's like, yeah, yeah, I got you. I like that move. Friday news dump. He's like, no. Tell me about the super volcano. You're aware of the Yellowstone caldera, Dave?

Honestly, every six months a story comes up and it gives me anxiety for a couple hours. Well, earthquake activity is up four times above normal at Yellowstone. All right. So what does that mean? Unfortunately, Dylan, at some point in the near future, which could be decades, could be hundreds of years, could be thousands of years, Yellowstone is going to blow the fuck up. You're saying, what are you saying? Yellowstone just been edging all these years?

Yellowstone's dope, man. It is dope. It is going to be an absolute ground zero for a horrendous environmental catastrophe at some point. Again, but it's overdue by a good couple of 40,000 years or so. I'm trying to bust. I'm trying to bust. Right. That's Yellowstone currently.

It's trying to bust. Dylan was saying the Yellow Rose is where he's trying to bust. Oh, come on. Anyway, as many as 445 earthquakes have been experienced during the month of June, which is up over 150 normally. That sounds like a lot of earthquakes. Yeah, which is usually a sign of impending eruption. And this is like ash covering the entire United States. The west of the Mississippi is more or less in for a pretty good night.

That's us, isn't it? Fuck. What's this going to happen, Brett? I need to know. What about the western part of Virginia? Hard to say. Ah, damn it. Hard to say.

Do you have family up there? No, and it's just, I like the song. Oh, right. But no cause for alarm here, boys. So it's going to be, probably nothing's going to happen from this. Nothing's going to come from it. Okay. According to weatherboy.com.

Okay. Is that your new weather app of choice? No, it's actually MyRadar, which you should get on. It's fantastic. You're a MyRadar. I need to dump the AccuWeather. Yeah. AccuWeather's radar maps are all over the place.

Okay. Oh, okay. Now I know where we're going with this. Tell us about the ocean. Randy. The Gulf. Okay, now I know where we're going with this. Tell us about the ocean.

Randy. The Gulf. Well, you heard of the Mexican state-owned oil company, I think it's Pemdex? Pemex. Pemex. Yeah, they had a little bit of an oil, a gas pipe burst in the Gulf of Mexico, and now it looks like a Roland Emmerich film in the Gulf. I'm no... The ocean's on fire, Dylan.

Well, they put it out, to be fair. But the Kings of Leon song. Can you tell me why they're spraying water on this? It's a great question. I'm not sure that it's water. I would imagine it is a chemical substance. Fire retardant. Okay.

There were some funny memes going on with a little boat that's just shooting a little jet 30 feet from its bow. I saw some people doing the memes about this, yeah. I was just like, what is, when the analyst, the first-year analyst chips in on the big. Expanding? Yeah, I don't know. Do we know how hot the water around it got?

I know that's probably, like, the least important in all this, but, like, I'm very curious. Like, how close could you get to that without, like, you know, boiling? I would imagine that anything in the white inner circle is probably pretty much boiling. Okay. I feel like a hot tub probably, Dave. You know, you put a little salt in your water to make it boil faster. And you know that this is the Gulf, so it is salt.

I heard you put olive oil in after it starts boiling, not before. Really? Yeah. And salt. I normally don't salt mine that much. Some people do. They say your water should taste like the ocean. What, Randy?

Randy's shaking his head. What are you, like an expert? Randy, can you go to the second video that we had pulled up? He's shaking his head. Yeah, this is another pretty good view where it looks like the gates to hell. Ah, yes. The apocalypse. Yeah, that looks like pretty good view where it looks like the gates to hell. Ah, yes. The apocalypse. Yeah, that looks like a movie.

Yeah. Because, you know. It's not what you want to see. It is a movie. Was anybody injured? Nobody was injured. Nice. Well, some fish perhaps.

Well, yeah, that probably. You going over with the net later on? Being like, we got some perch ready to go. Just, no, you know why? Because, dude, like cooking in the kitchen is far superior than on the grill or in the ocean. Right. We did that story earlier. Remember that?

That's cool. I'll listen back. The fireball has been contained. So what now? They're just going to have to fix the gas leak below the surface. Micah, you're a big fan of state-owned industry. What do you have to say? Yeah.

Especially PMAX. Because a lot of people are saying this is a glaring indictment on capitalism, and then people are countering and saying, well, this was state-owned. So what is it? President Andres Manuel Lopez Obrador said oil is the best business in the world recently. I think that, well, I mean, like $75 a barrel. Hard to argue at the moment, yeah. That's a lot of oil that's on fire literally right now.

That's many millions of dollars. What does this mean for gas prices? You know what? I'm not an expert on Mexican gas prices and what this means to their market there, but it can't be good. Sheesh. It's tough.

Well, Brett, thank you. Yeah, that's just a whole lot of fun breaking news for everybody on this. Have you got any leads on this dude's ass? No leads. No leads. Nobody's got. He lives in Austin, presumably. That's not a guy in town on vacation.

You don't wear that. That's a local. The vintage A&M Class of 88 hat. You don't go beer to the Dirty Bills if you're an out-of-towner? No, I haven't done that particular style since high school. What's that? You have done that style before? The beater.

Yeah, we were warm in high school. Beaters? Yeah. It was a no-show undershirt. Tucked into dress? No, no, no. Never tailored dress slacks. Never tucked it into dress slacks, I don't think.

The shoes, you can't really tell, by the way. They're either really nice boots or really nice dress shoes. I'm going to go with boots just because I think it just makes it that much more comfortable. It appeared to be boots to me on first glance. No fur. Glaring lack of fur, but good boots nonetheless. His buddy next to him, the guy in the photo you can see, he's not rocking the same level of athleticism or outfit or ass for that matter.

Still a good-looking guy, though. Those pants look to be tailored to fit his ass. Yeah. Either that or they're like, where are those stretchy jeans that you guys used to promote? Mugsy? Yeah. Oh, those are horrendously fitting jeans.

No offense to Mugsy. It's an old, old sponsor. That's never going to be a sponsor alert now because Brett just trashed them. Do you want ill-fitting jeans as a sponsor, Dan? I want ill jeans, not ill-fitting. Big news from social media. Cole Kamel just pinned my comment on his post. What?

What was your comment? Let's go. You dropped this with the crown emoji. What? It was a good comment. Oh, so did you report the big news from the ranch? This unfortunate news from the ranch? Oh, I haven't yet.

Oh, man. I don't mean to tease it like that. You're breaking news. I have to now. Kittums, unfortunately, has passed away. Kittums is no more. Rest in peace to a real one. R.I.P.

She broke her hip. Oh, man. I hate that. She was older, right? 19.i.p she broke her hip oh man hate that yeah and uh she was older right 19. 19. oh my goodness what's that kid was a fighter cat ears i you gotta think it's up there i don't know probably like 800 years old right something like that r.i.p kittens or why not for kittens i will thank you ah geez sorry i ended up on a rough note. Condolences. That's okay. Tough scene. That's all right.

We'll just pull up a picture of that guy's ass. Change the vibe in here. Always make things better. We'll see you guys on. Praise the spirits and maybe something else. See you guys Wednesday with Cactus Jack and noted New York Times bestselling author W.R. Bowen. And tomorrow with mystery guest on The Bachelorette.

Only on Patreon. Bye-bye. Do it, Dylan. W.R. Bowen and tomorrow with mystery guest on The Bachelorette only on Patreon. Bye bye. Do it, Dylan. Outro Music